#ariana grande + avril lavigne packs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dbnightingale24 · 2 years

Text

The Idea Of Marrying Me

Ransom One Shot

Okay, so this is part 2 to ‘A Disaster From The Start’. I’m making it known now that there will be a part 3 and it’ll be the final part (so don’t yell at me too much). I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I really did try to make this shorter and by doing so, I made this longer. I really don’t know why my brain is like this. Once again, @maroonsunrise83 made and amazing moodboard and I love her to bits!! (Thank you!!) So, here we go and I hope you all enjoy it!

Word Count: 32,912 (I’m honestly so sorry, y’all)

Warnings: Smut (so much smut), MINORS DNI, arguing, public sex, public fingering, drinking, swearing, cheating, Daddy kink, heartbreak, angst, drama, crying (the fucking crying, holy shit), unprotected sex, family drama, lying, degradation kink, anal sex (slight), so on and so forth, I’m sure I missed something.

Song(s) That Inspired This Chapter:

Tears Dry On Their Own - Amy Winehouse

Back To Black - Amy Winehouse

You Know I’m No Good- Amy Winehouse

Love Is A Losing Game - Amy Winehouse

He Can Only Hold Her - Amy Winehouse

Too Little To Late - JoJo

Break The Man - Tears For Fears

Breaking The Girl - Red Hot Chili Peppers

I Don’t Wanna - Aaliyah

All I Need - Aaliyah

Only One - Ariana Grande

Dead Horse - Hayley Williams

Run The Road - Santigold

Fall To Pieces - Avril Lavigne

Summary: After taking some much needed time away from Ransom, you truly believe that you’re ready to head home, new fiancé in hand, and handle whatever he throws your way. What happens when he forces you to realize that you haven’t moved on as much as you think you have?

I do not consent to gave any of my works/stories posted elsewhere.

You sit in the bridal suite, looking down at the ring on your finger. It’s felt heavy since the day it was placed on your finger. It feels too heavy. How had you even gotten yourself into this situation? How is it that you always find yourself in the wrong situation?

“Babe, what is the problem with going back home? We’ve been together for 2 years and I’ve never seen where you grew up. It’s not even like it’s far from us,” your fiance, Ryan, questioned with a small chuckle as he drove you both to your childhood home.

“I just don’t liked going,” you sighed, looking out the window; a small sense of happiness coming over you as started to recognize the scenery around you.

You hadn’t been home for 5 years. It was the best move for you, even though it hurt like hell, its what you kept telling yourself. Ransom had finally promised everything you ever wanted from him, but it was just too late. Too much had happened, and there was too much pain. He begged for hours, only leaving when you were both too tired to cry any longer. You didn’t see him again until your graduation, where he surprised you with a bouquet of your favorite flowers: peonies.

After your parents took you out to dinner, Ransom picked you up and took you out to a movie, then for a walk, in which you two talked about everything except what was wrong. The night ended with you against his bedroom wall and him deep inside of you, decorating your neck and chest with hungry and desperate kisses.

You snuck out of his house the next morning and made your way back home, making sure everything you truly wanted was packed before leaving and driving to your new apartment. You hadn’t bothered to tell Ransom that you were moving or that you’d changed your number. You just couldn’t bear it. You forced yourself to block him on social media and did your best to not ask about him.

A clean break.

The crying didn’t stop for at least a year, but when it finally did, you were happy because it finally became easier to mask the pain.

You were finally able to get your mom to leave your father and you were the one to represent her in court. As much as it pained your father, he wasn’t surprised and he was more than fair with dividing up everything between them. Of course it didn’t surprise you or your brother when they started sleeping with each other a few months later. No, you both weren’t supposed to know, but it wasn’t hard to put two and two together.

In the time that you and your mother spent together, she’d tell you about Ransom even though you begged her not to.

“Mom, just stop,” you huffed, closing your laptop and gathering your files. “I’m just not strong enough. I’m not even strong enough to hear this.”

“But babygirl-”

“No mom, he did this. I hate that it’s hurting him and that he’s miserable, but how do you think I feel? He did this to me! For fucks sake, I don’t even go home now because I’m terrified of running into him!” you sighed, forcing yourself to hold back your tears. “He cheated on me, twice. He had everything he wanted...no mom. Just no.”

“Love always finds a way,” she smiled softly before getting up. “See you on Friday?”

“Yeah,” you said and cleared your throat. “I love you.”

“I love you too, sweetie.”

That night you decided to torture yourself and look at the photos you two took in the Hamptons, because it was all you had left. You told yourself a million times that you would delete them, but every time you thought you had the strength to do it, you just ended up in tears. However, you knew you needed to stop and you told yourself that you were gonna put yourself back out there. So after seeing your mom that Friday, you went out with a group of work colleagues and decided to at least try and have fun.

Insert Ryan.

He’d been trying to get your attention for some time, but you never paid much mind to him. It’s not like there was something wrong with him; he just wasn’t Ransom.

At least that’s what it was like at first.

You let him take you back to your apartment that night, and even let him kiss you goodnight. That was the limit, because you refused to let yourself move too fast or end up in another ‘friends with benefits’ relationship.

Ryan was patient and took it at the pace you wanted. In the beginning, Ryan was sweet and kind. He was considerate, passionate, compassionate, fun, and funny. God, he was so funny. You finally gave in after 6 months of friendship. He was a welcomed distraction from your heartache and maybe that’s why you ignored all the warning signs.

Sometime after 3 months of being together, between him meeting your parents, your brother (and his now family), and your friends, you noticed a shift in his attitude. He became more easily irritated, he lied about where he was going and who he was going with, and he became manipulative. Both Sam and your mother told you before it even got to that point that something was off, but you didn’t listen. You figured that after everything with Ransom, you’d spot any issues at the first sign.

You should’ve listened.

“No! I wanna know where the fuck you’re going!” you yelled at Ryan as he got dressed.

“I fucking told you, Y/N. I’m going-”

“Out is not a fucking place, Ryan!”

“So you’re gonna start questioning me because your last boyfriend fucked you over? Haven’t I always been good to you? Patient with you? After all the waiting I did to show you how much I want you and this is how you tell me you love me?” he scoffed, putting his jacket on.

You’d told him about your previous boyfriend (purposely leaving out his name), and you’d regretted it ever since because he used it against you every chance he could. “I’m not going to keep doing this with you, I swear to God. If you can’t be up front with me, I’m fucking done. You’re not going to make me feel like I’m being unreasonable when you’re the one whose changed!”

“Y/N, if you really wanna end this because you’re paranoid, there’s nothing I can do or say to stop you. I’ve-”

“You act like I haven’t seen the napkins with phone numbers on them and the fucking lipstick on your shirts!”

“I always come home you, Y/N. If I was out having all this sex with other women, I’d be pretty exhausted and just stay there, don’t ya think? I swear to Christ-”

“Even if you’re not sleeping with them, you’re fucking entertaining them!”

“I can’t stop women from being attracted to me just like you can’t stop the guys at the office from hitting on you.”

“Funny how I never let the guys at work get as close as you let these women get to you.”

“Do whatever you want, Y/N. I’m done arguing about this. I’ll be home tonight and I hope you’ll be here when I get back,” he shrugged before walking out of the apartment, slamming the door shut behind him.

That night, like so many other nights, you cried to yourself about not being able to just leave. You wanted to call Ransom and beg him to come and get you. You wanted him to hold you and take you away.

Back to the Hamptons.

However, you weren’t about to be the girlfriend who kept taking back her cheating boyfriend all because she loved him. You refused to be your mother. So you stayed, and just slept in the other bedroom. It took a few days of that, with you only going back to the master bedroom after he came in apologizing and promising to be better at keeping his distance from other women. You knew it was all horseshit but what else could you do?

Yeah, leaving was always an option, but leave him and do what? You’d left Ransom to try and find someone better and ended up with Ryan. You felt like if you left Ryan, you would just find a shittier version of just him and Ransom. Knowing your luck, he’d probably be a fucking serial killer. So, you stuck around and waited for him to end it, because you figured it would happen sooner or later.

Only it never did.

Ryan swore he loved you and wanted nothing more than to spend forever with you, and you just chalked it up to him telling you what he thought you wanted to hear....until he proposed to you one night after a nice night out to dinner. You wanted to say no and you meant to say no, but ‘yes’ came out instead. It didn’t help that everyone you were close to didn’t seem all that excited about it. Yes, they told you congrats and that they couldn’t wait to see you walk down the aisle, but it was very obvious that they were only saying it to be polite. You should’ve pumped the breaks then, but once again you didn’t because you were just waiting for everything to work itself out.

Months went by and Ryan was still doing the same bullshit, all while still telling you how he couldn’t wait to marry you. He was still staying out, entertaining the attention of women in the office, and telling you half truths.

One night you got so fed up that you almost did call it off. Almost.

You lit a cigarette at the kitchen table as you turned your attention to the stove clock. 1am and he still wasn’t home or responding to your texts or calls. You looked down at the diamond engagement ring on your finger and scowled. The damn thing wasn’t even your style.

“Oh hey, y-you’re up,” Ryan smiled awkwardly, but his smile was soon replaced by a scowl when he saw the cigarette in your hand. “Y/N, it’s late and I don’t-”

“Where were you?” you interrupted before taking a drag from your cigarette. You weren’t in the mood to entertain his little mind games.

“I went out with Tyler and James. You already knew that-”

“No, I knew you were going to dinner with them. It’s 1 in the fucking morning. How long does it take you to eat dinner?”

“We decided to hangout afterwards, what’s the big fucking deal?”

“Okay, if you’re not gonna be honest with me-”

“I’m being fucking honest!” he snapped as if you were in the wrong. “Why the fuck are you even marrying me if you don’t believe me?!”

“That’s a really good fucking question,” you scoffed before taking another drag of your cigarette then exhaling. “Why did you propose if you’re desperate for the attention of other women?”

“Baby-”

“In fact, why don’t you just call this whole thing off? Why don’t we just-”

“Don’t say that, baby” he cooed softly, making his way over to you. “I don’t want anyone else’s attention but yours. I just want you. I only love you,” he stated almost desperately.

It’s not like you really believed anything he was saying, and you were still so angry with yourself. Was it really all that bad to admit that you’d been in two failed relationships back to back? Were you that afraid that you’d go running back to Ransom so quickly? You were so much better and stronger than that, but you stayed anyway.

The pain quickly unraveled into something less dangerous, more like an irritation: maybe that’s what made it so easy. That pain never stopped with Ransom, it was as constant and debilitating as a migraine. You never deleted the pictures at the Hamptons, or his number, and you never stopped missing or loving him. Whereas with Ryan, you kind of just accepted the situation for what it was. Besides, it’s not like you were getting any younger.

Your mother offered to throw a celebration for the both of you at the mansion (which your father gave her in the divorce), and Ryan was all too eager to say yes.

“This is where you grew up?” Ryan wondered aloud in pure disbelief as he pulled into the elegant driveway filled with fine masonry. .

“It’s just a house, babe. Relax,” you sighed, unbuckling your seat belt.

“Hey, what’s going on? We’ve been doing really good lately and this was really nice of your mom to do. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” you lied with a faux smile. “A lot has happened here and it’s been a long time since I’ve been home.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine, don’t worry,” he smiled before getting out of the car and grabbing the bags.

You took a deep breath and looked over the place you once called home. The memory you had of that place was of you driving away, tears streaming down your face as you attempted to rid yourself of Ransom once and for all. You convinced yourself you were doing the right thing. In fact, you were still trying to convince yourself that you had done the right thing. In that moment, you found yourself comparing Ryan to Ransom. The Christmas that you’d gone to check on your mother after everything had happened at your father’s Christmas party, Ransom sensed your hesitation and offered to take you back to his place. He’d given a fuck about you and your happiness

‘He also cheated on you twice, Y/N. Snap out of it,’ you scolded yourself mentally.

You took a deep breath before getting yourself out of the car. You probably weren’t even going to see Ransom, so why the hell were you so scared? Even if you did, it wouldn’t matter because you were sure he’d moved on by then and you very clearly had, too. You were getting married after all.

‘Yeah, just keep telling yourself that, dumbass,’ you scoffed mentally.

“You’re here!” your mother squealed, opening the door before you even had a chance to even knock on the door.

“Hi Ma,” you smiled, wrapping her in a hug.

“What took you two so long? It’s only a 40 minute drive!”

“Someone was dragging her feet,” Ryan teased, nudging you softly.

“I bet she was,” your mother scowled before stepping aside to let you both in.

“Your home is lovely,” Ryan complimented, looking around at the high ceilings and all of the pictures and paintings that adorned the walls.

“You’re too kind! I’m still so jealous of your parent’s summer home! It’s gorgeous!”

“It’s nothing compared to this,” he laughed softly “but thank you. They should be here later in the evening.”

“That’s perfect! Everyone should be here by then!”

“Everyone? Ma, who did you invite? I told you I don’t want a big to-do-”

“Your brother, some of your friends, Harlan, a few family members-”

“Ma!”

“Stop! It’ll be fun!” she scolded. “Now, take Ryan up to your bedroom so you two can get settled.”

“Fine,” you mumbled heading towards the stairs.

“Sunshine!” your father called, right before your foot hit the first step.

“Hey dad,” you smiled softly, turning to face him.

You and your father’s relationship was on a steady road to recovery, and while it had a long way to go, you two had made steady progress since your parents divorce.

“It’s good to see you! How was the drive?” he asked, engulfing you in a hug.

“Good...long.”

“It’s been so long since you’ve been here. I’m happy you’re home, even if it is only for a few days. I’ll let you two get settled, but maybe can do breakfast tomorrow? I know tonight is gonna be crazy.”

“I’d like that,” you smiled, nodding in agreement before facing the stairs again and starting the trip up them.

The minute you and Ryan got into your room, the questions started. “Why are you so miserable about being here? Things are very clearly fine between your parents and they’re both extremely excited about all of this. What’s going on?”

“I’d really rather just not talk about it right now. There’s just a lot of weight that comes with being here. It wasn’t always this happy and welcoming. I just need some time to-”

“Babe, that may have been the case then, but that’s not case now,” he interrupted, very obviously annoyed with you. “They’re doing something insanely kind for us, so the least you could do is fix your attitude. I’m going downstairs and I suggest you get it together soon and join me down there,” he finished, dropping the bags before practically stomping out of your room.

You sighed and pulled out packet of cigarettes, quickly pulling out and lighting one up before opening the glass door and sitting in the doorway of the terrace. Why couldn’t you get it together?

“You know, Ransom cried in this room for hours when you left him,” your mother said softly, standing in the doorway of your room.

“Not right now, Ma. Please.”

“He cried for hours and slept on the bed, hoping you’d come back.”

“Why do you keep pushing Ransom on me?! He cheated on me and broke my heart! Leaving the way I did was the only way I’d really free myself of him!”

“It was cruel, babygirl.”

“Jesus, just let it go! It’s over!”

“I know why you left and I’m proud of you, because you’re smarter and stronger than I ever was. You didn’t want to become me and marry someone like your father. Ransom was young and stupid though. He had his own demons and he didn’t know how to deal with them. You and him weren’t the same as your father and I. However, you and Ryan?” she scoffed. “Stay with him and you’ll end up just like your father and I. I keep telling you that boy is awful.”

“I really can’t hear this right now. I just can’t,” you sobbed softly, taking another drag from your cigarette.

“Listen, I’m your mother and I love you. I truly just want what’s best for you. If you truly believe that Ryan is what’s best for you and that you’re over Ransom, then so be it. You know yourself better than anyone else, but I would advise you to really think all of this through. You saw everything I went through...do better than I did,” she stated earnestly before exiting the room, closing the door gently behind her.

You stayed out on the terrace and cried for what felt like forever before finally deciding that you’ve had enough. You needed to get ready for the party your parents had thrown together. You’d wanted to wear your sheer black dress, but you knew it would get under your mother’s skin and she would make a thing of it. Since she was the one putting everything together, the least you could do was look like you wanted to be there.

It hadn’t dawned on you that you were wearing an outfit that Ransom once told you he thought you looked beautiful in. You spent so much time getting ready; changing was just going to be an added inconvenience and take more time. You turned on your straightener, impatiently waiting for it to warm, and forced yourself to look at your reflection in the mirror.

You were truly angry and irritated with the person looking back at you. You didn’t want any of this, so why were you letting it happen? When did you become someone who just accepted the things they hated instead of standing up for yourself? Wasn’t that the whole point of leaving Ransom? Forcing yourself out of a situation that was no good for you because of how miserable it made you?

‘No, you leaving Ransom is what turned you into this. One man broke your heart, so you chose to surrender to fear instead of fighting it, because you’re too afraid of being hurt again. Too afraid of really living life without him. Don’t start playing dumb now,’ you mentally chided yourself.

You sighed in frustration and slammed your fist down on the dresser of your vanity. You just wanted to go home and hide.

You wanted Ransom.

“I heard someone is being a difficult little bitch,” a familiar voice mused from your bedroom doorway.

“SAM!” you squealed, getting up and running over to her before engulfing her in a hug. “What the fuck took you so long?!”

“Work bullshit,” she laughed, squeezing you back just as tight. “What’s going on babygirl?”

“There’s no fucking time to talk about it because of this fucking party.”

“Well, looks like you’re about to do your hair and makeup, so I’ll do it for you while I listen to you tell me all about what’s been going on,” she smiled, leading you both back over to your vanity and sitting you down.

You spilled your heart out to Sam about everything that had been going on between you and Ryan, both before and after the proposal. You told her about your feelings for Ransom that refused to go away, even after so much time had passed, and what your mother said. You forced yourself not to cry the entire time.

You would’ve felt awful if you’d have ruined her amazing makeup job, on top of everything else.

“I mean...your mother does have a point,” she sighed, grabbing a piece of your hair, combing it out before clamping the straightener closed and slowly pulling it down.

“For fucks sake! Not you too!”

“Just hear me out, babe. Now, I haven’t done anything with Ransom since long before you two hooked up, but even then I knew that he was destined to always be an asshole. He could be a Hall of Fame asshole, babe, but I was just looking for a good time and so was he. However, things were different from the start with you two. Ransom never had the same girl twice, and if he did, he waited at least two months before sweet talking her up again. Wasn’t it only a week with you? Maybe two. No, I still don’t believe he deserves you, but I know he loves you. He had to lose you to realize-”

“Sam-”

“Hear me out,”she repeated. “Now, he had to lose you before he really understood something he never really wanted to: you’re truly the love of his life. Something about you made that made man want to try and eventually change.”

“What do you mean?”

“When you left, he got his shit together. He started a business, stopped bar hopping as much, seemed to clean up his act...I mean, he still treats people like shit, but he’s barely ever at clubs. I have it on good authority that when he is out, he’s not sneaking off to do shady shit.”

“And how do you know?”

“He and Shawn are friends now,” she shrugged as if it were no big deal.

“I’m sorry, back the fuck up. Shawn, your husband, is friends with Ransom?”

“They get along well enough and Shawn doesn’t care that much that Ransom and I hooked up. He just says that the past is the past and I’m with him now, so why should he care?”

“Why didn’t you-”

“Because you didn’t wanna know. You didn’t wanna hear anything about it and I knew you were trying to move on, so I just didn’t say anything. Just like I never said anything to him when he asked about you. I was doing what was best for you because I love you. Now, that being said, I think you need to leave the both of them alone and just find someone new.”

“Sam-”

“No Y/N, neither one of them are good enough for you. You just need to start fresh.”

“No, I don’t need to-”

“Has there ever been a time in your life when you’re not stubborn? When you’re not putting yourself through unnecessary pain?”

“Yeah, when I finally fucking left Ransom, which you and my mom say was a mistake.”

“I didn’t say it was a mistake, babe,” she sighed, placing your grandmother’s blue diamond encrusted butterfly pin into your hair. “I was so proud of you being strong enough to leave, but its been how many years now? And you’re still hung up on Ransom? He’s still hung up on you?”

“What does that even mean?”

“He hasn’t been serious about anyone since you, babe. He hasn’t been and doesn’t care to be-”

“Hey, is it okay for a gentleman to enter?” Ryan questioned, softly knocking before making his way in with a tepid smile on his lips.

“Depends, have you seen any fucking gentlemen?” Sam muttered quietly as she straightened the last bit of your hair.

“Stop it,” you giggled softly, nudging her before turning your attention to Ryan. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everyone is just waiting to see the bride to be,” he beamed, shifting his weight from one foot to another.

‘Oh, he’s fucking wasted,’ you thought to yourself. “I’ll be down in a moment.”

“I was thinking we’d go down together,” he smiled hopefully.

“That sounds good to me,” Sam beamed, before turning her attention towards you and dipping down. “Think about what I said,” she whispered before kissing your cheek softly. “I’ll see you both downstairs!” she smiled before quickly exiting the room, softly closing the door behind her.

“Are you done with your little attitude?” Ryan questioned, irritation flickering in his eyes.

“Lets just get through the night, okay?” you huffed, getting up and smoothing out your dress, trying to ignore all of your anxiety and silent rage. ‘You’ve gotta get it together, Y/N,’ you told yourself.

“What the fuck is your deal? Y/N, I’m telling you that if you don’t-”

“And I’m warning you,” you countered harshly, grabbing your clutch, “this isn’t the night to piss me the fuck off. You be on your best behavior and I will be, too. Fuck with me, and I’ll embarrass the hell out of you,” you finished darkly. The sudden change in his demeanor let you know that turned him on. ‘Of course his toxic ass is turned on by that.’ “Lets go,” you muttered before he could act on what he wanted.

You both made your way down the grand staircase, faux smiles on your faces, and were met with cheers and applause. As people made their way over to you two, you did your best to hide all traces of irritation and longing.

Longing for him, as always.

As you made your way into the kitchen, trying to find a bottle of the good whiskey that your father always hid in there, you felt a chill run down your spine.

‘What the fuck is that all about? There’s no way...no. Nope. No. He wouldn’t do that,’ you think to yourself, quickly pouring a generous amount in your glass.

“Y/N! Darling, it’s so good to see you!” Harlan smiled, greeting you with a hug. “You look beautiful as ever.”

“Always the gentleman,” you laughed softly, returning his warm hug. You’d missed him so much.

“I’ve met Ryan, he seems like a nice boy,” Harlan beamed, but his eyes told you that he wasn’t falling for the ‘nice guy’ act. “Are you happy?”

“Yeah...yeah, I am,” you lied, trying to convince both him and yourself.

“Then that’s all that matters,” he nodded, giving you a knowing look. That man could always read you like a book. “I’ve gotta get back to your mother though, I promised her that I’d play a round of ‘Go’ with her.”

“Kick her ass,” you laughed.

“Oh, I plan on it,” he smirked, only causing you laugh harder, before he made his way out of the kitchen.

As the night went on (and you got more and more buzzed), you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was...off. You’d searched for him desperately, but there were no signs of him. Even if you had located him at the dumb little party, what the hell were you going to do? Nothing, because there was nothing you could do without making a scene, and you wouldn’t do that to your family.

“Why the hell have you been avoiding me all night?! This is our celebration party and you’ve barely been by my side!” Ryan whispered harshly. He roughly pulled you into what was once your father’s old study, but had been turned into your mother’s lounge area.

“Back off, Ryan,” you warned, yanking your arm free and taking a sip of your drink. “You aren’t the only person I know at this fucking get together. I have to make my-”

“Get together?! This is a party to celebrate our engagement! This is a party about us and you’re-”

“Who cares, Ryan? Honestly, who the fuck cares? We’ve been engaged 6 months. This is just a reason to drag my ass back to this place,” you scoffed.

“Are you gonna keep being a bitch the whole night or-”

“Is everything okay in here?” an all too familiar deep voice asked, stepping into the room.

‘Fuck, keep it together, Y/N. Keep it the fuck together,’ you repeat internally as you tried to keep calm. “Everything’s fine,” you smiled as sweetly as you could, before turning to meet Ransom’s heated gaze. His eyes were burning with anger. Had he been listening the whole time? “We were actually just-”

“I don’t believe we’ve met,” Ryan interrupted, plastic smile on his face, sauntering over and holding out his hand “I’m Ryan West. You are?”

Ransom looked at the outstretched hand before looking Ryan over. “Hugh,” he responded flatly as you did your best to stifle your chuckle, completely ignoring the outstretched hand, before returning his gaze to you. “Are you okay?” he asked again, his voice still sturdy and tough; his eyes were soft, showing genuine concern.

“I’m fine, Ransom. Thank you,” you smiled with a slight nod.

“Alright, your father’s looking for you.”

“Okay, we’ll make our way-”

“Just her,” Ransom snapped, anger returning to his eyes as he looked to Ryan.

“Where is he?” you asked, desperately trying to break the little confrontation that you were sure Ryan wasn’t even aware of.

“We’re out back, I’ll take you,” he responded, motioning with his hand for you to follow him, though his gaze was still burning holes into Ryan.

“Ransom,” you called softly, bringing him back to you.

“Yeah, lets go,” he muttered before leading the way to the back deck, leaving Ryan dumbfounded.

“Where’s my father?” you sighed, once you looked around the back deck and saw no one.

“I don’t know,” Ransom shrugged, placing a cigarette between his lips “probably making out with your mother, those two can’t keep their hands off of each other,” he smirked before lighting up.

“Jesus, Ransom!”

“Listen, it didn’t sound like things were going so great in there, so I thought I’d get you out,” he exhaled, finally looking at you.

“Thanks,” you muttered, grabbing his pack of cigarettes and grabbing your own.

“You used to only smoke when you were drunk.”

“Well, I have had a few drinks.”

“I’ve been out drinking with you, darlin’. I know for a fact that you’re not drunk.”

“Ransom-”

“You left me for him? You made a great improvement,” he chuckled before taking another drag of his cigarette.

“I didn’t leave you for him. I left you then met him. There’s a fucking difference,” you corrected harshly, finally looking him over.

He had a full beard, he’d grown out his hair, and his sweater was hugging his muscles in all the right ways. He looked older, but not old. He looked mature and a bit exhausted. Just being next to him had you thinking all the wrong things.

‘Do not do this, snap out of it!’ you chided yourself. “Why are you even here Ransom?”

“I had some business with your father,” he stated simply, looking you over and a small smirk played on his lips. “Nice dress.”

“Piss off,” you snapped. “Of course you have business with-”

“It’s not that kind of business. I don’t do any of that anymore.”

“What other business could you have?”

“He helps me manage my money, Y/N. That’s it. Whatever destructive things he does at this point have nothing to do with me.”

“Well, why would you come here of all nights? I’m more than positive-”

“I wasn’t supposed to be here this long,” he interrupted, taking another drag of his cigarette “but then...”

“But then what?”

“I saw you coming down that grand staircase,” he sighed and you could tell he wanted to end the conversation, but you weren’t ready to let him off the hook so easy.

“And?”

“All the feelings of anger and rage I had towards you just melted away. You looked gorgeous and grown up. You seemed different and yet the same. I just wanted to make sure you were okay, because then I’d be able to force myself to leave you alone, but...”

“But what?”

“I know you, Y/N. For better or worse, I fucking know you and I could tell the instant I saw your eyes that you’re not happy. You haven’t been genuinely happy in a long time.”

“Ransom-”

“How could you just fucking leave? Like it was nothing? You left only to find him? Jesus, I know I’m a piece of shit, but for fucks sake-”

“Stop it, Ransom,” you warned, ashing your cigarette.

“Why? It’s just us right now. No need to lie, no need to pretend-”

“Because my mother is in the middle of throwing Ryan and I an engagement party! Because we had our shot and you fucked it up! You don’t get to be mad at me right now!”

“You didn’t have to-”

“Yes I did! You wouldn’t have let me leave and I didn’t want you to! It was best for the both of us!”

“Is that the only way you can sleep at night? Selling yourself on that bullshit?” Ransom scoffed, ashing his own cigarette.

“I can’t do this tonight, Ransom. I can’t and I won’t,” you sniffled, wiping away the few tears that dared to leave your eyes. “I’m going back inside-”

“For what?!”

“Because my fiance is in there, Ransom! Because in 2 months, I’ll be his wife and this...you can’t keep sucking me in!”

“You’re not even happy with him, but you’re gonna marry him?!”

“Goodnight, Ransom,” you sighed before turning and making your way back inside.

“You know it isn’t gonna work with him,” he whispered hotly, following closely behind you.

“Stop it!” you harshly responded, rounding the corner and searching for Sam.

“It’s not gonna work because you don’t love him, not like you love me!”

“I don’t love you!”

“Bullshit! I may be a piece of shit, but at least I’m honest!”

“That’s enough!” you snapped, whipping around so fast you almost slapped him across the face with your hair. “We’re not doing this! You need to move on, because I clearly have!” Ransom’s demeanor quickly changed and a smug, shit eating grin came to his face. “What?!”

“You’ve moved on?”

“Obviously!”

“So, you don’t love or miss me at all?” he questioned, cocking an eyebrow as he slowly started to make his way over to you.

“N-no,” you stuttered, backing away from him.

“So, if I touched right now...?”

“It wouldn’t mean a thing,” you lied confidently, as your back hit the wall. All you wanted was for him to touch you.

“So being this close does nothing for you?” he whispered hotly into your ear. “Cause I gotta tell ya, Princess, being this close and not doing anything is driving me insane.”

“Ransom,” you breathlessly moaned, though, it was supposed to be a warning call.

“Missed hearing all the sounds you make for me when I’m deep inside of you, Princess,” he husked as his hand gently caressed the side of your face.

“Fuck...stop it, Ransom,” you weakly protested, your breathing starting to become heavy.

“I miss you, baby.”

“Ransom...please,” you begged softly, not really sure if you were telling him to stop or to keep going.

“Lets just go. Get the fuck out of here and-”

“Everything okay here?” your dad questioned, causing both and Ransom to to jump.

“Everything is fine,” you quickly responded, clearing your throat, smoothing out your dress.

“Y/N-”

“There you three are! I went out back but couldn’t find anyone,” Ryan smiled making his way over to you. You didn’t miss the quiet scowl that left Ransom’s lips. “Everything okay?”

“Everything is apparently fine,” your father responded, cutting his eyes at both you and Ransom.

“I think it’s starting to wind down, so I figured you’d wanna start saying goodbye,” Ryan smiled, but his eyes held so much confusion.

“I’ll get back out there then,” you smiled , quickly getting yourself away from Ransom and making your way to the living area.

You only got out a few goodbyes before Ransom decided to...well, be Ransom.

“Hey, everyone!” he called from the middle of the grand staircase, big smile on his face. You already knew this wasn’t going to be good. “I feel so terrible because I didn’t bring a gift and I didn’t even know about the engagement! So, tomorrow, I’ll be closing my restaurant on Boston Post Rd early so we can do an engagement dinner for the lovely couple! It’ll start at 7!” he beamed with a faux smile.

“That’s so kind of you!” you beamed, smile just as fake as his, “but I just wouldn’t feel right-”

“We’d love that so much! Thank you, Hugh!” Ryan enthusiastically cheered, as you face palmed yourself.

In that moment, you truly could’ve strangled Ryan. You did your best to mask your utter rage and made eye contact with Sam.

‘He owns a fucking restaurant?!’ you mouthed to her.

‘Three’ she mouthed with a nod.

“I guess I’ll be seeing you tomorrow,” Harlan smiled brightly, wrapping you in a tight hug.

“I guess so,” you laughed incredulously, hugging him back just as tightly.

“Are you okay?” he whispered sincerely.

“Who the hell knows?” you responded before pulling away. “Tomorrow at 7?”

“I’ll see you at 7,” he smiled weakly before letting go, making his way to your mother.

That night you let Ryan fuck you senseless. It wasn’t even that you enjoyed the feeling of his skin on yours; it was you needing relief from everything Ransom made you feel earlier. In the end, Ryan brought you off, but it wasn’t what you needed. Ryan was a good fuck, sure, but that’s all he’d ever be. You couldn’t ever get to the level of satisfaction that Ransom brought you, but that wasn’t his fault.

Every time you and Ryan fucked, you found yourself comparing him to Ransom. Not necessarily on purpose, but you couldn’t help it. Size difference aside, the skill wasn’t there. Nor the passion, and that was the main thing. You wanted so badly to make love to him, but it just wasn’t there. Every time you two were together it felt like a college hookup. Just something for fun and to take your mind off whatever was stressing you out.

It was all consuming with Ransom. You didn’t just want the sex, you needed him. Every part of him. Every part of making love to him felt intimate and soul stirring. Every time he filled you with his love, you felt like you two were one. Every time he was deep inside of you, it made you forget that anyone else even existed. Ransom always took his time with you, worshiped every part of you, and made sure to tell you just how much he truly and deeply loved you- no matter how filthy and dirty the sex was. Then, when all was said and done, he’d just hold you and press soft kisses into your hair. He’d ask you about your day or just stroke your back until you fell asleep.

Being intimate with Ransom always felt like you were finally coming home. Whereas with Ryan, he was ready to leave as soon as it was over. There was no care, no cuddling, no sweet talking...he’d just get up and tell you he had work to do or that he was gonna go and, “see the guys”.

By sunrise the next day, you were more than ready to go to breakfast with your father and get far away from Ryan.

“Sweetheart,” your father started as the waiter placed your two coffees down. “Are you happy?”

“That’s a complicated question,” you sighed, taking a sip of your coffee and leaning back into your seat.

“It’s really not.”

“What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to be honest with me.”

“No, you really don’t,” you scoffed, taking out your pack of cigarettes.

“Sunshine, we’ve been through enough bullshit that I think we can both handle anything at this point.”

“What’s going with you and mom?” you asked, pulling out a cigarette and placing it between your lips, waiting for the light Spring breeze to pass before lighting up.

“We’re...trying to see if there’s any way for us to get back to where we were. She understandably has her reservations. So we’re just going at a pace that works for her.”

“Men really make no sense,” you chuckled, taking a drag from your cigarette, then exhaling. “You all will have everything you want, then throw it away. Simply because you can.”

“That’s not what happened with your mother, Y/N. I did love her and I saw how much I was hurting her, but...”

“But?”

“Remember when you were younger and you couldn’t resist doing dangerous, dumb shit? Like climbing to the very top of trees or jumping off the roof of the shed into the pool?”

“Yeah?” you laughed softly, remembering how much your mother would scream at you whenever she caught you in the act.

“Remember how much we told you to stop? How much your mother would cry when you’d hurt yourself, and how much I would I worry?”

“Yeah.”

“You still did it though, because you got a thrill out of it. It was a high for you and you loved it, no matter how much it hurt us. That’s what it was for me. I met your mother when I was a kid and had nothing. We struggled and then I started to do better. When that happened, the only thing I wanted to do was something good for your mother, because she’d stood by me through everything. Then the attention started coming in, and that’s something I’d never had before, and I liked it. It wasn’t bad at first, but somehow it started to spiral. After you were born, I told myself that I’d stop because I didn’t want you to hate me like your brother did. I was fine with it at first, because I was truly happy to have all of you. John and I were getting along, your mother was actually happy to have me around, and you thought the world of me.”

“So what happened?”

“I missed it. The attention, the partying, the drugs...I missed the thrill of it. I wasn’t proud of it and I could see that I was hurting your mother, but it was fun and I was a selfish fuck. It took my daughter representing my now ex-wife for me to realize how much I truly fucked up. You and John hating me...it’s what I deserve-”

“We don’t hate you, dad,” you sighed, taking one final drag of your cigarette before putting it out.

“I know...you know what I mean. Anyway, that’s a very long winded answer to your question,” he smiled softly.

“Thank you for being honest with me,” you smiled with a slight nod before taking a sip of your coffee.

“Now, what’s going on with you and Ransom?”

“Nothing,” you sighed, running your hand through your hair.

“I thought we weren’t bullshitting each other, sweetie.”

“I’m telling you the truth,” you scoffed. “It’s been over between us for years.”

“Didn’t look like it was over last night.”

“That was just Ransom being Ransom.”

“I don’t know what you did to him, but he changed after you left.”

“That’s what everyone keeps telling me,” you scowled, as the waiter made his way back over to take your orders. You felt your father’s gaze on you and you knew what was coming next.

“Sunshine, do you love him?” he asked as soon as the waiter was out of ear shot.

You contemplated having another cigarette before answering, but opted for playing with your lighter instead. “I always love him. Like a fucking fool.”

“And Ryan?”

“What about him? I’m marrying him aren’t I?”

“Do you love him?”

“I don’t know...yes? Sometimes? “

“So, you know you love Ransom, but you’re basically in like with Ryan?”

“Dad please, it’s...I can’t be with Ransom, okay? Too much has happened there...I don’t want to end up like you and mom,” you huffed as your food arrived.

“You aren’t happy, Sunshine. You smoke like a chimney, drink like a fish, cry when you think no one is looking, and you’re more angry than not. You weren’t always like this. At least not when you were sneaking around with Ransom.”

“Too bad Ransom cheated on me. Twice.”

“He was a child-”

“Don’t okay? Just fucking don’t. He wasn’t a child-”

“Y/N, not everyone is you. There’s no excuse for what he did and I’m still angry at him for what he did, but I get it. If you’re still this in love with him and not sure about Ryan-”

“This is for the best. What’s wrong between Ryan and I is on me,” you lied, stabbing at your eggs with your fork like they stole something precious from you. “I need to let go and move on completely. Getting married will help me do that.”

“You know you the best,” your father scoffed as he poured syrup onto his waffles. “If you truly believe that this is what’s best, then I’ll be more than happy to walk you down the aisle, alongside your mother, and give you away, but you need to be sure this is what you truly want. Trust me, I would know,” he warned.

The rest of breakfast went off without a hiccup and was mainly spent talking about the arrangements for your wedding. Your parents were footing the bill, despite you begging them not to, and your father was insisting on you having the wedding closer to home. You told him that it made no sense to change venues so close to the wedding date, but he promised that he could make anything happen. After he pushed, for the 5th time, you promised him that you would discuss it with Ryan.

Too bad that turned out to be a pain in the ass.

“I don’t know, maybe we should ask Hugh how he feels about it tonight,” he humorlessly laughed as he buttoned his pants.

“You’re the one who accepted his invite.”

“Because he needs to be put in his fucking place!”

“Sure babe, sure,” you laughed as you tied your hair up in a bright red ribbon.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!”

“You aren’t gonna be the one to put Drysdale in his place. I’m not even being a bitch, it’s just a fact.”

“What makes you so sure?”

“Ransom loves conflict, he thrives off drama, and he lives to piss off and offend others. He fucks with whomever and whatever he wants, and he’ll make sure to humiliate whomever gets in his way. That’s his territory, so just stand down.”

“Oh? Did he fuck you?”

“My father would have killed him,” you lied with a chuckle. No need to add more drama to an already stressful day.

“So there’s nothing for me to worry about?”

“Not as far as I know,” you shrugged, giving a fake smile.

The drive to the restaurant was filled with wedding talk, work talk, and petty arguments about Ransom.

“Then lets just fucking go back to my parent’s place!” you snapped as he pulled into the parking lot.

“And let him win? No!”

“Let him win what? What are you even talking about?”

“This is clearly some ego thing with him! The restaurant is called ‘Sunshine’! Isn’t that what your father calls you?!”

“Exactly. It’s what my father calls me. I don’t know why Ransom named his restaurant that, probably because it sounds like the name of a porn star,” you shrugged, grabbing your purse and looking yourself over in the mirror.

“Whatever, I’m gonna put this asshole in his place tonight.”

“Whatever you say, babe.. Whatever you say.”

As you made your way inside, you can’t help but marvel at the masterpiece in front of you. Ransom really created a beautiful castle subtly filled with all of the things you loved. The warm colored walls, the pictures of friends and family (though you could tell that some of them were photo shopped), even the cutlery plates were your favorite style. You were torn between feeling overwhelmed with love and happiness at the gesture and feeling angry and resentful about it.

The center pieces on each table were beautiful; translucent frosted rose vases, filled with peonies. The fact that he still remembered- after all of the time and drama that passed- had you fighting back tears.

‘He had his chance and he fucked up! Why is he always fucking with my head?!’ you thought to yourself as the hostess seated you and Ryan at the head table, along with both of your families.

Ryan’s mother greeted you with a faux smile on her lips and a scowl in her eyes, as per usual, while his father looked happier to see you than usual.

“So Y/N, you’ve lived quite a life out here!” Mrs. West beamed as the waiter filled her wine glass with Merlot.

“I guess so,” you shrugged uncomfortably. You hated talking about money and hated people knowing that your parents have a ton of it. It made you feel like you fell into that role of ‘poor little rich girl’ cliche, which is the last thing you wanted.

You didn’t need or want anyone’s judgment or pity. As if on cue, Ransom showed up.

‘Always saving me. Always breaking me,’ you told yourself mentally.

“How is everyone?” he asked looking around the table, but his gaze settled on you, and you knew he could tell how uncomfortable you were.

“We’re all wonderful,” Ryan’s mother smirked, drinking him in. You couldn’t help but shake your head and chuckle.

“I’m glad to hear that,” he smiled down at her with his boyish grin that always made women feral over him. You knew he was having fun at Ryan’s expense, and the part of you that was still petty was enjoying every bit of it.

“Hugh, if you could just get the bill now I can settle-”

“It’s a gift,” Ransom smiled, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “Besides, I can afford it. No big deal,” he shrugged before turning his attention back to the table. “Just wanted to let everyone know that changes were made for tonight’s menu in honor of the bride and groom to be. If anyone needs me, I’ll be in my office,” he smiled at you before turning to leave.

“Why don’t you join us?” your mother chimed in, causing you to choke on your wine.

“Yeah, since you put all of this together, it’s only right that you join us. Besides, this is for friends and family,” Ryan smirked.

Ransom looked to you before he spoke and saw how uncomfortable you were, and whatever smart ass comment was about to leave his mouth stopped. “I’d love to, but unfortunately, I have a lot of work to get to.”

“Sounds like it would do you some good to have me pay the bill,” Ryan chuckled, taking a sip of his scotch.

In Ransom’s defense, he really had to tried to be decent, but they’re some things you just can’t change.

“Besides this one, I have two other restaurants that I own and manage, all three have just been voted in the top 5 best places to eat in Massachusetts. In fact, in order to put this dinner together for you two lovebirds last minute, I had to shut down a photo shoot that’s been planned for weeks and now have get it done before the end of next week so it makes the deadline for all the travel magazines and blogs. Just minor stuff, you know. So no, I don’t need you to pay for anything. What I need is for you to be more grateful and a little more fucking polite, while you sit here and drink my best scotch for free,” Ransom growled.

You just wanted the ground to swallow you whole as both you and Sam made eye contact, looking at each other with pure panic and dread.

“Auntie Y/N!” your niece, Sydney, called as she ran over to you.

“Oh thank God,” you mumbled before getting up and meeting her halfway. “Lovebug! How are you?!” you exclaimed, picking her up and showering her with kisses.

“I’m better today! Sorry we didn’t come to your party last night,” she sighed mournfully.

“That’s okay, peanut, you’re all here now,” you smiled at the sad 4 year old, who then instantly brightened up. “You wanna know a secret?” you whispered.

“Mhm,” she nodded furiously.

“You’re my favorite person here,” you smirked as she giggled, “but shhh!”

All she did was nod and hold a finger over her lips. Your niece truly was your most favorite person in the world.

“Hey sis,” your brother John smiled, engulfing you in a hug. “What the fuck is going on over there?” he whispered in your ear, and you knew he was referring to an angry Ransom and Ryan.

“Later. Much later,” you muttered before greeting Ashley, who couldn’t wait to hug you. “You all take a seat and order what you want, it’s very much on the house,” you mumbled to her with a soft smile.

“Why do I have a feeling that this being paid for by Ransom is part of the problem?”

“Because you’re not just pretty, you’re really smart too,” you smiled and Ashley couldn’t help but laugh.

You helped them all get get seated as close to the front of the table as possible, before Ransom stalked off to his office. You jumped a little in your seat when he slammed the door shut. You felt the eyes of Sam and your family on you, but you just kept your attention on the menu in front of you, which happened to be filled with all of your favorite meals and deserts.

‘Always the charmer,’ you thought to yourself while a small smile played on your lips.

“We’re talking about this later,” Ryan whispered to you, as the waiters came around to take everyone’s orders.

“No, we’re not,” you snapped back in a hushed tone.

“Something went on between you two-”

“Ryan, you were a complete dick to him. That whole exchange could’ve been avoided if you’d stop believing that the world owes you something. Your obsession with status and money is truly remarkable,” you huffed.

“Y/N, you’re one to talk-”

“So Ryan, how have things been at the firm?” John interjected, once he noticed how fired up you were getting.

“Things are amazing! Your sister is kicking so much ass-”

“That’s a bad word!” Sydney sassed and gave her a small smile and a wink.

“You’re right, I’m very sorry,” Ryan smiled at her as she held her angry scowl at him. “You’re aunt is doing amazing at work.”

“Of course she is, she’s the best,” Sydney nodded matter-of-factly.

“That’s amazing, sunshine,” your father beamed at you.

“Yeah, she may even make partner before the wedding,” Ryan grumbled as you rolled your eyes. He hated that you made more money than him.

“Really?! Sis, that’s awesome!”

“It’s really not a big deal. I’ve been told I love to argue, so it finally turned into something that puts food on the table,” you smirked, remembering when Ransom poked fun at you.

“Yeah, but with partner, you’ll making-”

“Can we table the money talk for a while? It really doesn’t matter,” you chuckled uncomfortably.

“Of course it doesn’t matter, you have it,” Ryan muttered.

“And so do you, so drop it,” you snapped, your irritation reaching its boiling point.

“Have you two talked about changing venues at all?” your mother questioned, wanting to change the souring mood as quickly as possible.

“We still haven’t decided,” Ryan smiled towards her.

“The wedding is 2 months out! The quicker you decide, the quicker we can make the arrangements!”

“I just don’t see why we need to change the venue,” you huffed as your plate of lamb and potatoes were placed in front of you.

You couldn’t help but smile at the fact that Ransom had placed your order for you.

“You’re already so far, sweetie. We just want one thing that’s closer to home,” your mother smiled sympathetically.

That made you feel a little bad.

“What venue are you two so dead set upon?” you asked her with a small smile.

“The 228 In Sterling!”

“That place is gorgeous.”

“It’s simple enough and I know you love simplicity! It’s a farm and-”

“A farm?” Ryan’s mother interjected. “I thought that we all agreed that a simple venue was the way to go.”

“If my daughter isn’t comfortable, I don’t want her-”

“I want everyone to be happy and comfortable,” Mrs. West quickly interjected. “I just want it to be in a civilized manner.”

“There’s nothing uncivilized about a barn wedding. Especially when you’re spending-”

“I need to take this call,” you smiled, happy that a spam call finally came in handy. “It’s the office, so it may take some time.”

“Of course,” Ryan scowled, “we’ll be here waiting for you.”

“I’ll be as quick as I can,” you smiled before you rushed off with your little purse. You pressed ignore on your phone then pressed it to your ear, “Erin! How is everything going with the Wilkes case?” you asked loudly.

You went to duck into the coat check room, but the coat check girl was still there.

“Hey, can you leave for like...30 minutes?” you asked as kindly as you could, pulling out your pack of cigarettes and taking one.

“Um...I really can’t. I know this party is for you, but Mr. Drysdale-”

“If he gives you a hard time, just tell him it was all my fault.”

“Miss Y/L/N, I-”

“Listen...?”

“Diana.”

“Diana,” you smiled, lighting a cigarette, “I’m having a really fucked day and none of it is your fault, but I really just need a few minutes to escape. If you’re really that afraid of Ransom, send him in here and I’ll talk to him.”

“You can’t smoke in-”

“Diana, really fucking terrible day,” you smiled, but your aggravation was starting to show.

“Let me just go and get Mr. Drysdale,” she smiled frantically before she practically ran out.

You took maybe two drags from your cigarette before Ransom burst in and slammed the door shut behind him. “What the fuck, princess?”

“You have your employees that afraid of you?”

“Only when I’m stressed the fuck out. What the hell is going on?”

“Why are you stressed?”

“Y/N, what’s the problem?”

“I’m just done for the day. It’s been argument after argument and I just can’t fucking do it anymore. I’m done.”

“How the fuck is what happened between that little prick and me my fault? He started it!”

“When did I say it was your fault? I’m well aware that Ryan is an asshole, I know that little outburst was his fault.”

“Oh,” he states softly. “Then why are you with him?”

“Ransom, I’m tired and I don’t feel like doing this right now,” you sighed before taking another drag from your cigarette.

“There’s no smoking in here.”

“Oh seriously? Fuck off!”

“Go smoke outside.”

“Ransom, if I walk outside that door, I’ll just fucking run away. I’ll run until my feet bleed and my legs give out,” you muttered, running a frustrated hand through your hair.

“Then explain it to me. Explain all of this to me, because I just don’t fucking get it. This isn’t you.”

“As if you know me.”

“I’ve known you since the first time I laid eyes on you.”

“Ransom, just stop. Fucking stop. Why are you even doing this?”

“I wanted to see what I was missing. What the fucking appeal of him is, if he ever treats you right...if you actually love him.”

“Stop it.”

“You don’t. He’s just a good time for you.”

“Go away,” you snap, fighting back tears.

“Then stop fucking smoking in my coat check area.”

“Why are you being such a dick?!”

“Because you’re being a bitch.”

“Fuck you,” you scoffed and threw your cigarette down, stomping it. “Just send me the bill for this little shit show and I’ll cover it.”

“I don’t fucking need you to cover it,” he snapped.

“Yeah whatever, fuck you,” you muttered as you bent over to pick up the bludgeoned cigarette.

You should’ve read the room. You should’ve seen the signs and noticed his mood, but you didn’t. The minute you bent over, Ransom’s hand was sliding under the bottom of your dress. You couldn’t stop the moan that left your mouth and you honestly didn’t want to. You wanted him.

You needed him.

“You had to fucking look like this tonight?” he growled as he hooked two fingers onto your panties and slowly started pulling them down.

“Ransom...don’t,” you warned with a quiet whimper.

“You come back here, looking fucking gorgeous as ever, and you’re telling me not to fucking touch you?”

“Ransom-”

“He’s not who you fucking want, princess,” he husked as he stroked your soaked lips with two fingers. “He doesn’t make you feel good like I do, does he?��

“Please,” you groaned, losing your resolve.

“No, you’re gonna fucking tell me the truth,” he grunted before sliding his two fingers inside of you.

“Oh fuck!” you whimper as quietly as you can.

“Does he get you off like I do?”

“No,” you moaned, leaning against the desk top, gripping it tight.

“He doesn’t even make you feel good?”

“No!”

“Quiet princess, you don’t wanna get caught do you?” When you didn’t answer him, you could tell that he knew he had you. “Don’t get quiet on me on me now, baby.”

“Ransom please!” you begged quietly, your release building up.

“You need to be fucked like a little slut, don’t you?”

“Yes...yes please!”

“Been so long since someone has treated you the way you deserve to be treated, hasn’t it?”

“You have no fucking idea,” you confessed with a silent sob.

“That’s okay,” he quipped, removing his two fingers despite your protest, before unbuttoning and unzipping his pants: “I’m gonna make you feel so good.”

“Ransom...fuck!” you mewled, suddenly remembering how wrong all of it truly was as he thrust himself inside of you. “We can’t do this!”

“Why not? What’s the problem?” he grunted, fucking into you as if he’d been alone in the world for thousands of years. “We both want this-”

“Ransom...oh my fuck! I’m with someone else!”

“Someone who can’t even satisfy you,” he chuckled before pulling the red ribbon in your hair loose, letting your hair fall freely. “You don’t even love him, do you?”

“I do!”

“Not like you love me,” he retorted, picking up his pace.

You knew that lying to him when he had you in such a position was pointless. “Ransom-”

“No princess, I need you to tell me the truth. I need to fucking hear it,” he almost begged as he fucked faster, more intensely.

“Please don’t make me-”

“You don’t love him like you love me, do you?”

“No!” you confessed breathlessly as you came hard on his cock.

“That’s my girl, such a good girl for Daddy,” he moaned, as he pulled you upright, pushing his cock even deeper inside.

“Shit!” you squealed, covering your mouth almost instantly.

“Oh, I think you want him to catch us,” Ransom husked against the shell of your ear before nipping on it. “You want him to catch us so he can finally see the right way to fuck you. Is that it?” You couldn’t stop yourself from clenching around him. “God, I missed how fucking filthy you can be,” he chuckled as he started fondling your beasts over your dress. “Fuck, I’ve missed this perfect little cunt so much!”

“Ransom...I’m so close!” you whimpered, wrapping an arm around his neck, your back pressing against his chest.

“Do it, baby!” Ransom whispered hotly against your ear. “Fucking cum for me!”

“Oh God!” you sobbed quietly, your orgasm washing over you so hard your legs almost gave out.

Ransom let you get yourself together before his own movements started to become erratic. “Where do you want it, princess?”

In that moment, you truly appreciated Ransom, because he knew. He knew you just needed a release; besides getting you to admit that you did still love him, it had been filthy and a good way to get rid of stress. He also knew that for him to cum inside you would be entirely too intimate for you. He knew you couldn’t handle that.

Not on top of everything else.

“My mouth,” you moaned softly. “Please...m-my mouth.”

“Gonna need you to get on your knees pretty fucking quick, baby,” he groaned, pulling out of you.

You were on your knees almost instantly, looking up at him with your mouth open wide.

“Shit, you look so good on your knees for me,” he moaned as you got your mouth around him. You started to massage his cock with your tongue as you sucked on him, “You’re so good at this, baby. So fucking good at pleasing me,” he grunted, grabbing a fistful of your hair as he lulled his head back and started breathing heavy. Once you started massaging his balls, Ransom legs almost gave out. “Shit!” he breathlessly moaned, his release quickly filling your mouth.

You took your time cleaning him up as an act of kindness. You made sure you got every last drop out before releasing him, wiping the sides of your mouth, and getting up.

“How do you feel?” he asked as he tucked himself back into his pants.

“I need to get back,” you said breathlessly. “Where’s my ribbon?”

“It doesn’t matter, do you feel any better?”

“Ransom, I just cheated on my fucking fiancee. I feel like a piece of shit because I am a piece of shit.”

“Princess, I’m pretty sure he cheated on you a few times.”

“That actually doesn’t make me feel better. Give me my panties,” you demanded.

“I’m keeping these as a souvenir,” he chuckled with a devilish grin.

The fact that it turned you on made you feel a brand new type of rage...and desire. “Fuck you!”

“You just did.”

You slapped him hard before storming out of the coat check area. Before walking back into the dinning area you took a deep breath and smoothed your hands down over your dress. You cleared your throat before walking back in the dining room to your seat.

“Jesus, that took forever,” Ryan mumbled as he kissed your cheek. “Where’s your ribbon?” he asked when he noticed your hair down.

“Oh, I decided to take it out when I was outside and dropped it at some point,” you lied with a small smile.

“That sucks, my mother likes your hair better when it’s up. I do too,” he faintly smiled before returning his attention back to a conversation between your father and his.

You tried to focus on the food in front of you, but how could you? What had you just done? It barely took Ransom a full 24 hours to get between your legs and get you to confess how you really felt about him. You really were weak whenever you were around him.

Just one touch...

As you continued to drown yourself in self hate and true disbelief at how easily you cracked, you felt a pair of eyes on you. You looked over at the table next to yours; Sam’s eyes are glued to you, one eyebrow raised.

She knew. Of course she knew. She knew you better than you knew yourself.

A few moments later, you felt your phone buzz and you already knew who it was.

Other Half: Tell me you didn’t.

Y/N: Please don’t make me hate myself more than I already do.

Other Half: WHY?!

Y/N: Because I’m fucking pathetic, and should’ve stayed far the fuck away from here.

Other Half: Stop it, it’s not the end of the world. It’s a one and done thing, right?

Y/N: Absolutely. I’m staying far the fuck away from him for the rest of the time I’m here.

Other Half: Then just...leave it at that. It’s not like Ryan’s squeaky clean and this is the first time you’ve ever done anything out of line.

Y/N: It’s still not right.

Other Half: It’s just Ransom, babe. Just think of it as a form of release and move on.

Y/N: You know he’s much more than ‘just Ransom’ to me.

Other Half: That’s why I said to move on, love.

You put your phone down and took a giant sip of wine, letting the events of the day and Sam’s words roll around in your head. You were so lost in thought that you hadn’t noticed that Ransom had started going from table to table asking everyone about their meals.

“Everything was amazing,” Ryan’s mother beamed at him, causing you jump a little as you went for another sip of wine.

“Y/N, you’ve barely eaten. Big meal earlier?” Ransom smirked with a cocked eyebrow and you choked on your wine.

“It was great, I just don’t have much of an appetite right now,” you sputtered, shooting a glare Sam’s way as she tried to stifle her chuckle.

“Ya know, you should cater the wedding,” Ryan’s mother smiled at him. She really was smitten with him.

“We have a caterer, mother,” Ryan all but growled through gritted teeth. “Besides, with three restaurants to run, I’m sure he wouldn’t have time for our little wedding, especially on such short notice.”

“It’s all up to Y/N,” Ransom smiled at you sincerely. “She knows there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her.”

“Thank you Ransom,” you smiled as sweetly as you while trying to silence all of the voices in your head telling you to run.

“I’ll let you all get back to it,” he smiled at the table before walking over to Sam’s.

You could feel Ryan’s glare on the side of your face, but you were just too tired to care. You didn’t even want to come back home, but he insisted. He was just going to have to deal with the consequences at this point.

As the night bore on, you got drunk. The list of reasons was long and growing: you were mad at and ashamed with yourself, you were angry with Ryan, you were angry with and missed Ransom, your parents and future in-laws wouldn’t shut the fuck up about wedding venues, and your shoes were too tight and hurt. By the time the night finally came to an end, both sides were happy to tell you that they’d agreed on a venue closer to your parents mansion; the reception could be held there.

Made sense, because when did anyone ever give a shit about what you wanted?

“I’m getting you two a car service,” Ransom said as he saw you stumbling past the coat check while Ryan started to look a little rough around the edges.

“No thanks, Hugh,” Ryan smiled sarcastically. “I’m fine to get my fiancee and myself home safe.”

“You had 6 glasses of scotch. You’re not driving either of you anywhere,” Ransom warned with a low growl.

“Guys, stop it,” you slurred, finally giving in and taking your shoes off.

“What is all this? Some big show for her? A final play to win her love? She’s with me, Hugh,” Ryan scoffed, pushing Ransom.

Oh, he was more drunk than anyone originally thought.

“Why are you picking a fight?!” you hissed at Ryan, quickly getting in between the both of them. “You’ve done nothing but be an asshole-”

“And you’re just eating it up!” he snapped at you. “You haven’t seen the way he’s been looking at you all night? The way he was looking at you last night?”

“Ryan, we’re both drunk. It’s been a long day and we both just need to sleep it off,” you sighed, too tired to keep going back and forth. You were also mortified that all of this was happening in front of your friends and family.

“You can sit here and pretend he’s not trying to get in your fucking pants if you want, but I’m tired of it!”

“Watch it,” Ransom warned.

“Everyone just needs to calm down,” John snapped, getting in between you and Ryan.

“She’s my fiancee, Hugh. She’ll never be yours and you need to accept that or we’re gonna have a real fucking problem on our hands,” Ryan growled.

Ransom just chuckled humorlessly and you knew he was doing all he could to not beat Ryan into a pulp. “The car will be here to pick you two up in 5 minutes. Enjoy the rest of your night,” he dryly quipped before he stormed off towards his office, slamming the door shut.

If looks could kill, Ryan would’ve been dead in an instant. Between your father, John, Sam, his parents, your mother, and you it was a wonder that he was still even standing.

The minute you two got into the car, Ryan went off. You just closed your eyes and clenched your fists. You couldn’t have another argument in front of a total stranger.

“Are you even listening to me?!” he snapped at you, slamming his hand down on the empty seat between you two.

All you did was open your eyes and glare at him in a way that made him cower slightly. He didn’t say a word for the rest of the drive.

When you two finally arrived at your parents mansion, all of the fun parts of your buzz wore off and all you were left with was rage. “Ma’am, are you gonna be okay with him?” the driver asked once Ryan was stumbling out the car and up the steps like a baby.

“I’ll be fine,” you huffed, your angry gaze following him.

“Mr. Drysdale will want me to-”

“Mr. Drysdale? Hugh Ransom Drysdale?”

“Yes ma’am, I’m his personal driver,” the man smiled weakly.

You let out an incredulous laugh, doing your best to contain the new wave of anger that washed over you. “Please let Mr. Drysdale know that I am perfectly fine and he needs to stay out of situations that don’t pertain to him. I know I sound like a bitch right now but my anger isn’t directed at you. I’m just sick of people today,” you huffed, feeling bad about the sharpness in your tone.

“Believe me, I understand,” he chuckled, “I’ll be sure to pass your message along to Mr. Drysdale,” he nodded before pulling off.

You quickly stormed up the steps and slammed the door shut behind you once you made your way inside. You could hear raised voices from your father’s old study and stormed ahead towards it.

“Where’s Sydney?” you asked Ashley as soon as you reached your destination.

“She’s sleeping, thank God,” she muttered, taking a sip of her whiskey.

“Good,” was all you said before storming to the center of the room, getting between your father and Ryan. “Are you fucking stupid?!” you screamed at Ryan. “I really wanna fuckin’ know! Are you fucking stupid?!”

“Y/N-”

“My four year old fucking niece was there, you idiot! Have you lost your mind?! To speak to me and Ransom like that in front of a fucking child?! It’s one thing if its a room full of adults, but a child?!”

“Sis-”

“Do I sound like I’m finished speaking?!” you snapped at John and he quickly went quiet. “If you ever speak to me or anyone else like that in front of her again, I swear to God that I will leave your ass on the spot! Am I fucking clear?!”

“Baby-”

“AM I CLEAR?!” you yelled at him with more force than you knew you had.

“Yes,” he responded softly, looking at his feet. “Can we just talk about this while we’re getting ready for bed?”

“You must be high as a fucking kite if you think you’re getting anywhere near me tonight. You’re sleeping in the fucking guest room, which is more than you deserve,” you bite before storming out of the room and up the steps.

The minute you get to your room, you close it as softly as you can so you don’t wake Sydney, before starting to pace as a weak attempt to calm your nerves.

“Hey psycho, I see you still need to get your anger in check,” John laughed softly as he made his way into your room.

“I could slap the shit out of him, I swear to God,” you grumbled through grit teeth.

“You need to calm down.”

“What the fuck do you think I’m trying to do, John?” you hissed at him.

“Yes, Ryan did everything wrong tonight, and dad had to hold me back from hitting him a few times, but Ransom was making advances towards you, sis. You had to notice that.”

“Who fucking cares, John? Honestly, who gives a shit? He doesn’t know my history with him and at the end of the fucking day, Ryan’s gaudy ass ring is on my finger! Who cares?!”

“You did disappear for a bit.”

“Ryan goes off for a bit more often than not. Now he knows how it fucking feels.”

“Come again?” John questioned, clenching his fists.

Too tired, angry, and drunk to lie, you just tell the truth. “He’s a fucking cheater, John! He cheats on me and then makes me think that I’m being paranoid and crazy when I know I’m not! He throws my past traumas in my face and tells me that it’s not fair that I project all that shit onto him! It’s not like he’s some fucking saint that I’m fucking over! This is the first and only time he has felt an ounce of what he always makes me feel!”

“I’m gonna fucking kill him,” your brother huffed, marching towards your door.

“No, because it’s been fucking resolved. We’ve been doing better, with the exception of tonight-”

“Y/N, this isn’t you. You don’t settle.”

“Clearly, I fucking do,” you mumbled as you made your way over to the drinking cart in your room. “I left Ransom and found Ryan. I’ll fucking leave Ryan and end up with someone worse.”

“You don’t know that.”

“John...please just don’t, okay? I’m gonna fucking deal with Ransom tomorrow and-”

“Like you dealt with him today?”

“Oh fuck off,” you scoffed, taking a sip of your whiskey.

“Everyone who knows the history between you and Ransom knows what you did.”

“Do you all want gold stars?”

“You can’t keep going back and forth, Y/N.”

“What the fuck does that even mean? I haven’t seen or spoken to Ransom in years. All of this has just been a lot and I needed the release. It means nothing.”

“Do you truly believe that?”

“Yes. I’m not the same person I was in college. Not entirely the same person. Yes, I do still love him, but too much has happened, John. Too much time has passed and we just aren’t in the same place we were in before. It’s over,” you sighed, wiping away the few tears that spilled out.

“I just want you to be happy, Y/N. If there’s anyone who deserves it, it’s you. Just make sure you’re making the right choice,” he sighed in defeat. “I’m going to bed though. I’m tired, I’m angry, I’m buzzed, my daughter cried for 2 hours because of that little display at Ransom’s restaurant, and my wife and sister are furious. I need to fucking sleep,” he laughed to himself.

“Sleep tight,” you smiled softly as he kissed your forehead.

“I love you.”

“I love you,” you stated softly before he left your room.

You showered repeatedly that night, trying scrub the day off of you. You knew it was useless because the memories weren’t going anywhere. You’d given yourself to Ransom, and no matter how much you tried to look at it as just a release, it was so much more than that. You’d told Ransom you loved him and that you loved him more than you loved Ryan. You told him that you didn’t love Ryan in the way that you loved him.

Why couldn’t you tell him no? Why did you always have to fall apart for him? Ransom had hurt you so deeply and it still hurt, so why couldn’t you just turn off your feelings? Why couldn’t you stop loving him?

Those questions and more wracked your brain as you tried to get some sleep, but you couldn’t sleep for more than an hour or so at a time. By the time the sun was up the next day, so were you; sitting up in your bed and smoking a cigarette. You looked out at your terrace, dreading what you were about to do next.

You at least had to try though.

You got out of bed before anyone was even awake and grabbed the keys to your father’s 2019 Aston Martin Rapide before rushing out, speeding to Ransom’s house.

“Open up!” you screamed, banging on his door, not caring whose peace you disturbed in the process. “I know you’re home! Open the fuck up!”

“Jesus Y/N,” Ransom answered groggily as he opened the door “what the-”

“What the hell do you want from me?!” you snapped, pushing your way past him and making your way into his house. You did your best to ignore the fact that he was shirtless and focused on your goal. “What the fuck was yesterday?!”

“I didn’t do anything you didn’t want me to do,” he yawned with a shrug.

You couldn’t stop yourself from slapping him on the chest. “You didn’t need to throw that fucking dinner, you could’ve told me no, you didn’t need to get your personal driver to drive us back to my parents, and you didn’t need to bait Ryan!”

“He started-”

“No Ransom, you knew what the fuck you were doing! You knew that he would eventually react and lose his shit, but you fucking did it anyway! What do you want from me?!”

Ransom sighed and was thoughtful before he spoke. “You just fucking left, Y/N. No warning, no text, no call, no fucking letter...you just fucking left!”

“What was I supposed to do, Ransom?! I told you that I’m done with you and you bought us a fucking house in the Hamptons! You were never gonna just let me leave! You would’ve always tried to find a way to suck me back in until you got your shit together!”

“Princess, I know-”

“No, you really don’t fucking know,” you sobbed. “I loved you. I loved you more than I’ve ever loved anyone and I defended you! I defended us! Just for you to turn around and betray me twice! I would have loved you until my dying day and you just...” you trailed off as the tears started to flow freely. “I gave you my heart and soul blindly, twice, believing that you truly wanted me. Wanted us...you don’t get to do this to me, Ransom. You don’t get to rock my world again and turn everything on its head. You don’t think I wanted a future for us? You don’t think I thought about our wedding time and time again? I didn’t do this and it’s not fucking fair!” you cried, stomping your foot like a petulant child.

“Baby...I know and I’m so fucking sorry,” he sniffled as he made his way over to you slowly.

“No!” you snapped, backing away from him. “I was weak yesterday and fuck, I’ll probably always be weak to you, but I’m going to put up a fight against you when I can! Don’t touch me and don’t get close to me, Ransom!”

“If you could just-”

“No, this is done. Leave me alone, Ransom. Moving on from you has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do and I refuse to let you push me back,” you sniffed as you cried.

“I never meant to hurt you. I never wanted to do this to us-”

“But you fucking did, so let me go,” you breathed as you dried your eyes, before turning and storming out of his house and speeding off in your father’s car.

When you finally got back to your parent’s place, you stayed in your father’s car and cried for what felt like hours. Most of what you had yelled at Ransom for he deserved, but what happened the day before...that was on you. Even though you knew that, you couldn’t bring yourself to come to terms with it.

Not just yet.

“Where did you go?” Ryan asked softly as you made your way back inside.

“For a drive,” you responded bitterly as you hung your father’s keys back up on the key rack.

“Baby-”

“I’m not ready to talk about it, Ryan and I’m nowhere near ready to hear you out. I just want to go home,” you sighed, knowing that you’d never actually be home unless you were with Ransom. “So, just pack up your stuff so we can go. Your car is out front, so I’m assuming Ransom had someone drop it off.”

“Can we just-”

“Not right now, Ryan.”`

You both said bye to your parents and brother, with Ryan apologizing profusely to everyone, and started on your journey back home. The car ride was tense and filled with a painful silence. Each time Ryan tried to place his hand on your lap, you just moved it away from him. When you two finally got back to the apartment you two shared, you went straight to the master bedroom and slammed the door shut. You got under the covers and cried until you fell asleep. Crying seemed to be the only thing that brought you any kind of comfort.

When you woke up, there were a ton of missed calls and texts from Sam and your mother, but you just text them both telling them that you didn’t have the energy to talk about your feelings.

You got up and made your way to the kitchen, finding Ryan on the sofa, mindlessly flipping through channels.

“You’re up,” he smiled weakly.

“Please leave me alone,” you sighed, continuing your trek to the kitchen.

“Just here me out, babe. Please,” he begged desperately, trailing behind you.

“What?” you huffed, not even bothering to look at him as grabbed the bottle of Buffalo Trace’s 1993 O.F.C. Vintages your father had gifted the both of you as an engagement gift.

“Whatever did or didn’t happen between you and Hugh...I shouldn’t have acted the way I did this past weekend and I’m truly sorry. All of the times I’ve made you feel like shit...you didn’t deserve that. I guess I just got scared because for the first time, I felt an actual fear of losing you. I get it though, everyone just needs to have their fun sometimes and I truly get it. I understand and I’m not mad, I just really want us to get past this. You forgive me and I forgive you,” he smiled at you sincerely.

You stood there completely dumbfounded at what he’d just said. He basically admitted to cheating on you, while also telling you that its fine if you did cheat on him, because you got it out of your system. You opened your mouth to speak, but nothing would come out. The best you could do was look at him, utterly confused, before storming off.

You got drunk off your ass that night.

For the next two weeks, you tried to just forget everything that had happened. Ryan’s heartfelt and well meaning confession, you cheating, both of yours and his parents basically taking over the wedding, and Ransom.

You always tried to forget about Ransom.

You were getting by, for the most part, until Ransom rocked your world yet again.

Shithead: I need to see you.

Y/N: Ransom, how the fuck did you get my number?!

Shithead: Oh, so you changed your number and kept mine?

Y/N: Ransom, leave me alone.

Shithead: We need to talk, Princess.

Y/N: We already talked.

Shithead: No, you came to my house at 6:30am and screamed at me. We didn’t actually talk.

Y/N: There’s nothing to left to say.

Shithead: So you get to say your peace and I have no say?

Y/N: Ransom, leave me alone.

Shithead: You at least owe me this.

Y/N: Fine. When and where?

Shithead: I want a week with you.

Y/N: You’ve lost your fucking mind if you think I’m spending a week with you.

Shithead: It’s gonna take longer than a day for us to work all this shit out, Sweetheart.

Y/N: Ransom, I’m not spending a week with you so fucking forget it.

Shithead: Ya know, Ryan’s mother has been begging me, almost every day, to cater your wedding. Maybe I’ll tell her yes.

Y/N: Why do you have to be an asshole all the time?

Shithead: To make sure I get what I want.

Y/N: Fine. One week and that’s it. Where?

Shithead: Our house.

Y/N: What the fuck are you even talking about?

Shithead: You know, it honestly does hurt how quickly you forgot about that.

‘There’s no fucking way he’s talking about the house in the Hamptons’ you thought to yourself. Y/N: You don’t mean that house in the Hamptons.

Shithead: That’s exactly what I’m talking about.

Y/N: Ransom...why would you still have that house?

Shithead: Because it’s ours.

You felt your swell and break at the same time and it took all you had to not breakdown and cry at your work desk.

Y/N: Fine, when are we doing this?

Shithead: This Saturday.

Y/N: I’ll meet you there.

You shut your phone in your desk as you tried to avoid a complete and total meltdown. That week went by faster than it had any right to, and by the time Saturday came, both you and Ryan were at your wits end.

“But why does he want you to represent him?” Ryan asked for what felt like the hundredth time.

“I don’t know, Ryan. I guess he just trusts me,” you sighed as you threw a travel bag into your backseat.

“There’s nothing going on?”

“Ryan, I don’t want to have this talk anymore so I’m not going to,” you huffed as you slammed the door shut. “Besides, you’re the one who said that everyone just needs to have their fun, right?”

“Baby-”

“There’s nothing to worry about, okay? I’ll be back before you know it.”

“You’re gonna be in the Hamptons?”

“Yeah, he has a place out there and I guess that’s where he goes to relieve stress,” shrugged as you got into your car and started it.

“Let me know when you get there. I love you,” he smiled weakly, and you could see the fear in his eyes.

“Love you too,” you smiled before driving off.

The entire drive, you felt every possible emotion possible. There were a few times you almost turned around and almost text Ransom that he could cater the damn wedding, but you in the end knew you two needed it. Maybe closure would finally help you move on and just maybe you’d find the courage to leave Ryan.

Maybe you’d find the courage to be yourself again.

When you pulled up to the house, your heart began to race as you fought back tears. That house had held so many promises for you two and so many memories. Though a small part of you was happy he chose to have the talk there. It gave you a little hope that you’d be strong enough, seeing as this house also represented what he threw away.

Ransom was standing in the doorway, smug grin on his face, as you grabbed your bag.

“Lets get this over with,” you muttered, pushing past him and making your way inside.

“Happy to see you too,” he chuckled, closing the door behind him.

The first two days were brutal. Doors were slammed, feelings were hurt, yelling was the only tone either of you had, tears wouldn’t stop flowing, and hearts were shattered.

“I told you that I’d try and that there would be a few bumps!” Ransom yelled at you as he followed you into the kitchen. “I was fucking trying, Y/N-”

“Jesus Christ! I fucking told you that I didn’t want to be your crash test dummy!” you shouted back as you grabbed a bottle of wine. “But you don’t fucking listen! You don’t think about anyone but yourself-”

“I don’t think about anyone but myself?! Jesus, it must be nice up there on that fucking high horse you put yourself on! You fucking left, Y/N! You just fucking vanished!”

“I told you why I left!”

“Horse shit!” he retorted, grabbing a bottle of whiskey and a glass. “You fucking left because it was the easy way out for you! You left because you’re a fucking coward!”

“I’m the coward?! You’re the one who let us crash and burn because you were afraid to change! Afraid of not being the shit bird they all knew you are! So don’t fucking-”

“I stayed!” he yelled, slamming his glass down on the counter top. “I stayed, I fucking changed, and got my shit together! What the fuck did you do, Y/N? Huh? Become a successful lawyer which isn’t even what you want to do, fucking meet Ryan and commit to that piece of shit?! Agree to marry him because you’re too much of a coward to leave and trust yourself to make a better choice for yourself? Too afraid to trust me again? Yeah, you’re doin’ real fuckin’ great for yourself,” he scoffed, taking a long drink from his glass. “I may be a real fucking piece of shit, but fuck all if I haven’t fucking tried to get this shit right! If I haven’t tried to be better for you! Don’t talk to me about being a fucking coward when you’ve let yourself become this,” he motioned towards you.

You just stood there and cried because he had you. There wasn’t a word that he said that wasn’t true, but he could also go fuck himself since he had a major roll into turning you into a shell of yourself. You went upstairs to the bedroom you’d been staying in and settled yourself in the middle of the bed. You curled your knees upward before hugging your legs to your chest and taking a huge gulp from the wine bottle.

There was soft knock at the door before Ransom opened it and slowly made his way in. All you did was glare at him as your tears continued to flow. “I’m sorry,” he sighed before sitting at the edge of the bed.

“I fucking hate you,” you cried before taking another swig from the wine bottle.

“Stop it, don’t say that. I know it’s my fault, okay? I did all of it.”

“Then why did you fucking say it?”

“Because I’m fucking mad at you, Y/N. I’m fucking furious with you, because that was the worst day of my life. I woke up one day and you were gone. No one would tell me anything, you changed your number, you blocked me on everything...you just left and it fucking hurt.”

“I had to leave, Ransom,” you sighed, wiping your eyes.

“I know that too. I guess I’m mainly just angry with myself,” he huffed before taking a sip from the whiskey bottle. “You were everything and I just...” he trailed off as his own tears started to come.

“I shouldn’t have just left like that,” you mumbled. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not like I gave you much of a choice.”

“I always had a choice and a part of me just wanted to hurt you and the other part of me...”

“The other part of you?”

“I saw us turning into my parents and I didn’t want that. I didn’t want to be my mother. Loving you with all I had just for you to continue to throw it away? I knew that if I stayed, I would’ve taken you back and you wouldn’t have changed.”

“Yes I would-”

“No you wouldn’t have,” you scoffed before taking another drink from the bottle. “If there’s no consequence what’s your incentive to change?”

“My incentive is that I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“You did it the first time and you felt bad then, too. You still cheated again, Ransom.”

“I also loved you and that meant everything to me. Your love meant everything to me.”

“Love clearly wasn’t enough,” you smiled at him meagerly.

You two spent the rest of that night drinking in silence, but not leaving each other’s side. At some point you both fell asleep, and when you woke up Ransom had cuddled you close. You knew you should’ve pulled away and ended the trip early, but you felt so happy and content in his arms. You hadn’t felt like that since the last time you and Ransom were happy and deeply in love in what felt like eons ago.

You decided that the third day would be pleasant one. Plus, your throat really was starting hurt from all of the screaming. Change was needed.

“So, a restaurant huh?” you asked as he made breakfast for the both of you.

“Someone once told me I had potential and that I’m a pretty good cook,” he smirked at you over his shoulder. “So, I decided to open up a restaurant. I knew how to manage it and run things, I hired some of the best cooks around and decided to give it a shot. I didn’t fuck it up so I decided to open up two more for the hell of it,” he chuckled. “Besides, I knew I couldn’t win you back with an ‘I’m sorry’ and bouquet of flowers. I had to really get my shit together.”

“Are they all named after me?” you teased, ignoring the happiness that was bursting from your heart.

“No,” he laughed, “but they’re all styled in a way you’d like and all of your favorites that I’ve made for you are on each menu.”

“I’m proud of you, Ransom.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, you’ve done well for yourself and you did it on your own. You did all this despite what your family thought of you and I’m proud of you. I always knew you could do anything.”

“That means a lot coming from you,” he smiled as he walked over to the table with plates in hand.

“You remembered!” you squealed with delight as he set down a plate of Eggs Benedict with a side of potatoes.

“Of course I remembered,” he chuckled. “It’s your favorite.”

“Because I’m so high maintenance,” you mused, remembering back to the first time he made it for you.

He’d called you high maintenance and said you had an expensive palate. In return, you told him not to fuck up your breakfast.

“Yeah, you’re one of the most low maintenance, high maintenance women I’ve ever known,” he laughed.

“How many women have you made swoon over breakfast at this house?”

“None. No one’s been here except you. No one even knows about this house besides you. I come here alone sometimes and just think, but it’s been here empty for the most part.”

“Why don’t you get rid of it?”

“Because it’s our home. You had to come back eventually, and when you did, I would’ve tried my best to get you back out here. The week I spent out here with you was the best week of my life. I wasn’t about to give it up so easily,” he smiled sheepishly.

“What do you wanna do today? I don’t feel like arguing today,” you questioned as you cut into your brunch, trying to ignore everything you were feeling.

“Well, the weather’s nice so we can go out on the boat if you want, or we can go out and shop-”

“What do you want to do?”

“I wanna stay in with you and watch movies, talk, and just...I want us to get along.”

“Then that’s what we’ll do,” you smiled.

You both spent the rest of the day laughing and talking, like the first two days of hell hadn’t happened. When it came time for a movie, he let you choose, but he did give you a hard time.

“Of course you chose ‘Roman Holiday’,” he teased as you pulled it up on one of your streaming accounts.

“You told me to choose my favorite movie, so I don’t know why you’re giving me a hard time,” you laughed as he came in with the wine and popcorn.

“You probably watch this every weekend.”

“I wish,” you huffed as the movie started. “Maybe I’d be in a better mood.”

“What? Ryan doesn’t like to indulge in the things you like?”

“Ryan is picky about indulging in the things I like.”

“Why are you even with him?”

“He wasn’t always like this, Ransom. Maybe it’ll change after we’re married,” you shrugged with a sigh before reaching for your glass of wine.

“He’s a fucking leach, babe. Nothing but another Joni.”

“Stop it, no he isn’t. He has money. His family has money.”

“Not like we do.”

“Ransom-”

“Think about it, princess. Your family is paying for the wedding, the venue change, you make more money than him-”

“How do you know so much?”

“He got my number from your father and sent me an apology text. He explained how he’s just feeling overwhelmed and a bunch of other bullshit,” Ransom scoffed, grabbing his own glass of wine.

“Still-”

“Is he encouraging you not to sign a prenuptial?” he asked, finally meeting your gaze. Your silence told him everything. “He’s marrying you for money and security.”

“Is that how got my number?” you questioned, returning your gaze to the screen. “My father gave it to you?”

“Sorta, I got into his phone and took it,” he chuckled before shoveling popcorn into his mouth.

“Ransom!”

“What? It’s not my fault your father’s password is so easy,” he laughed.

“What is it?”

“Oh? I thought I did something wrong.”

“I’m nosey, Ransom. What is it?” you chuckled

“Their anniversary. Your mom and dad’s.”

“That’s kind of sweet?” you giggled.

“You know they’re gonna wind up back together, right?”

“Yeah, I fuckin’ know,” you sighed “but they’re the adults here, right?”

“You’re finally getting it,” Ransom teased as you kicked him playfully.

You two went through three bottles of wine during ‘Roman Holiday’, and by the time he was ready to put on the second movie, you were feeling free.

“The second movie is your choice,” you smiled with a slight giggle.

“Oh, you’re drunk,” Ransom laughed.

“I’m a little buzzed, but I am not drunk,” you corrected with a head nod. “I just need to eat something besides popcorn.”

“Let me see what I have in the fridge-”

“Lets order something,” you interrupted, grabbing his forearm as he went to get up. “I want you to stay right here with me.”

“Why’s that?” he questioned, his gaze softening as he looked you over.

“Life’s better when you’re by my side,” you confessed softly.

In one swift move, Ransom was on you and you didn’t stop him. As his lips kissed their way down to your neck, his hands wrestled with buttons on your shorts before getting them loose and pulling them down.

“Ransom,” you moaned breathlessly.

“I love you,” he whispered hotly against your neck as one of his hands slipped down into your panties, quickly finding your most sensitive bundle of nerves.

“I love you!” you mewled, arching your back a little as your nails dug into his flesh.

“I just wanna make you feel good,” he husked as he picked up his pace. “I just wanna make you happy!”

“I just need to feel you, baby,” you moaned, unbuttoning his jeans and forcing them down as much as you could.

“Are you sure you want this?” he asked, pushing himself up to meet your gaze.

“You’re all I ever want,” you responded truthfully, brushing a strand of hair behind his ear.

“So fucking beautiful, baby,” he groaned as he thrust himself inside of you.

“Fuck!”

“Missed having you beneath me like this! Missed you so much, Princess! Dreamt of this for so long!”

“I’ve needed you so much,” you sobbed, wrapping a leg around his waist. “You’re all I ever think about!”

“I haven’t loved anyone since I’ve loved you,” he panted, fucking into you faster. “Just want you...just need you.”

“Baby, I’m so fucking close!” you cried as your toes started to curl.

“Do you know how hard it was for me to not cum deep inside this perfect pussy?” Ransom asked as he picked up his pace. “You looked so fucking good and I just...fuck! You’re mine!” he growled as he tightened his grip on you.

“Ransom! I need you to destroy me in the way that only you can!”

“Holy shit! I need to let go inside of you! Please!” he desperately begged.

“Do it, please! Just...just wanna feel whole again,” you mewled as felt yourself reaching your peak.

“Y/N!” he yelled as he spilled his hot seed deep inside of you.

“Fuck!” you cried with a gasp, cumming hard as your leg tightened around his waist.

Ransom had one arm around your waist and pulled you up with him, so that you were straddling him. He pulled your shirt off and threw it across the living area before kissing all over your chest, as you quickly undid the buttons on his shirt before practically ripping it off of him.

You were well aware of the crime that you were committing, but you didn’t care. You weren’t even going to blame the alcohol, because at the end of the day, the fact of the matter was that you loved Ransom and he loved you. You’d worry about the guilt and shame you’d feel later. For the time being, you just wanted Ransom and to feel whole again.

“I’m so fucking sorry,” he husked, looking up at you as he started to come to life again. “You don’t even know-”

“Don’t wanna think about that right now, baby,” you moaned looking down at him as you started to grind your hips against his. Your hair falling in front of your face. “I just want right now with you. Us, right now...that’s all that matters,” you breathed before dipping down to kiss him deeply.

As your tongues fought for dominance, one of Ransom’s hands traveled between you two and found the sensitive bud that always had you coming apart for him.

“Fuck,” you sighed, breaking away and leaning your head against his.

“Missed making you feel good, baby,” he groaned, picking up his pace. “God, I love you so fucking much. I’m gonna love you all over this fucking house.”

“Please!” you whimpered, feeling your release coming on again.

“What does my good girl need?”

“T-to..to cum! Please!”

“I don’t think so baby, not yet,” he teased, a devilish grin on his face.

“Please!”

“Will you be my good girl tonight?”

“I swear I will,” you whined before biting your lower lip.

“You’re so fucking sexy,” he grunted looking up at you, loving the beautiful mess you’d become. “Ride me, baby. Ride me and cum hard on this cock.”

“Shit!” you hissed, placing your hands on each side of shoulders as you started to ride him.

“So good for me,” he husked, doing his best to fight off another release.

“Always wanna be good for...you,” you whimpered, your grip on him tightening. “Shit!”

“Come apart for me, baby,” he encouraged softly before taking one of your nipples into his mouth, licking and sucking on it hard.

“Fuck Ransom!” you screamed, lulling your head back as your orgasm washed over you hard.

Ransom released your nipple with a ‘pop’ before chuckling darkly. “And we’re just getting started.”

Ransom did love you in every part of that house that night, promising you that he’d treat you right, never leave you, and that he’d love you forever. Your only response being that you wanted to be with him, but that you didn’t want to think at the moment. You just wanted to be in the moment with him.

The night ended with you two 69-ing in the master bedroom, you both finding your release together since neither of you wanted to give up dominance.

“What can I do to earn your trust?” Ransom sighed as you laid down next to him.

“I don’t know. I honestly don’t,” you mumbled, not ready to start discussing reality so quickly.

“You know I’m sorry-”

“Ransom please,” you huffed, turning on your side to face him. “I just...I don’t know what any of this means, okay? I just know that I love you and when I’m with you, I’m lighter. The world isn’t as scary as it actually is, I’m not stressed, I’m genuinely happy, and everything makes sense.”

“So then-”

“Because you hurt me, Ransom. You broke my heart twice that doesn’t just go away because we yelled at each other for 2 days and fucked a whole bunch on the 3rd. Plus, I’m supposed to be getting married in a month and I need to-”

“You can’t still be considering marrying that douche bag!”

“Ransom!” you huffed with a frustrated sigh. “Why are we doing this now? This can wait till tomorrow. All of it can wait till tomorrow.”

“Cause you’ll have time to come up with argument tomorrow and I can never win when you’re at your best,” he muttered, pulling you close to him and kissing your forehead.

“You never win either way.”

“Fuck off,” he laughed. “I do love you, Y/N.”

“I know baby and I love you,” you smiled before kissing his chest. “Lets just rest for now. I’m sure we’ll be able to argue about this after we sleep.”

“I don’t want to argue, Princess.”

“Me neither, but we will.”

When you woke up the next morning, Ransom was on the phone with what sounded like his actual lawyer, so you grabbed one of his white button up shirts and put it on, before quickly going into the other room and grabbing your phone.

‘3 texts from Sam, 2 missed calls from mom, 1 text from John, 3 missed calls from work, and 2 texts from Ashley. Nothing from Ryan, what a shock,’ you thought to yourself as you made your way back to the main bedroom.

You weren’t even sure why you were so upset, because it’s not like you were being a saint. You were well aware of the type of man Ryan was, but for a moment he seemed like he actually gave a shit about whether or not your relationship would make it.

‘Probably worried about the money going away,’ your inner voice scoffed.

“What’s wrong Princess?” Ransom asked as soon as he got off the phone, noticing how you plopped down on the bed.

“Nothing,” you lied with a faux smile.

“You know better than to lie to me, sweetheart,” he taunted before getting in next to you. “It’s about Ryan, isn’t it?”

“He hasn’t text or called and I don’t know why it’s bothering me.”

“Because you love him,” Ransom responded bitterly. “Fuck, I really did a number on you, didn’t I?”

“I thought I was being smart, discovered I wasn’t, and yet here I am. Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with me?!” you groaned, covering your face with your hands. “Why can’t any of this shit be simple?”

“Because I keep complicating things even when I don’t mean to,” he chuckled softly as he wrapped an arm around and pulled you close. “I know I can’t change or take back what I did and how much I hurt you, but I truly wish I could. I know I don’t deserve to be the one you choose, but I really hope you do.”

“Ransom-”

“However,” he continued gently “even if you don’t pick me, don’t fucking choose him either, Princess. He’s a piece of shit and a leach. You say you don’t wanna end up like your parents, then don’t choose him, baby,” he mumbled against your cheek as one of his hands started to massage your breast.

“Ransom,” you sighed “we need to clean up downstairs-”

“We can do that after. You don’t wanna start your day with me filling you up?” he questioned hotly against your ear, as his hands traveled down between your legs.

“Fuck!”

“I’ve loved watching you walk around in my clothes. You look so fucking sexy when you’re nothing but my shirt,” he praised as he rubbed your clit faster.

“Ransom please,” you mewled, gripping the sheets as you threw your head back.

“Be a good girl and cum for Daddy,” he demanded roughly and you followed orders instantly. “Get on your hands and knees for me, baby. I want you to face that mirror and watch me fuck you. I want you to see just how fucking beautiful you look when you explode for me.”

Ransom’s filthy words had you dripping and forgetting about what the hell you’d been so stressed about before. The minute you were in the position he wanted, he thrust himself into you.

“Never get tired of this fucking pussy,” he grunted as fucked into you relentlessly. “Never get tired of hearing the sounds you make for me.”

“You’re so fucking good to me, Daddy,” you whimpered, dropping your head as you felt the knot in your core tighten.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk, someone isn’t being a good girl,” Ransom taunted, grabbing a fist full of your hair and forcing your attention on the mirror in front of you. “You’re gonna miss the best part if you don’t listen,” he growled lowly as he bent down to whisper in your ear “and you don’t want that do you?”

“No,” you sobbed, feeling your release coming on.

“No who?” he questioned, slapping your ass hard.

“No D-Daddy!”

“That’s my good little slut.”

“Please let me cum, please,” you begged, his words and roughness making you clench around him.

“The way this cunt is squeezing me...we’re both gonna cum, shit!”

“Please cum with me!”

“You better keep your eyes on the fucking mirror,” he grunted, sitting upright as his movements became erratic. “Fuck! Cum for me, baby! Cum for me right now, Princess!”

“Shit!” you screamed, cumming hard as you felt him spill into you, forcing yourself to keep your gaze on the mirror in your blissed out state.

“See how fucking beautiful you look when you let me fill this pussy?” he moaned, riding out both of your highs.

“Yes baby, fuck!” you groaned as he pulled out of you.

“Fuck, I love having you like this,” he moaned. You watched him watch the mixture of your juices run down your thigh and drip on to the bed and you could feel yourself getting worked up again.

Ryan could never.

“Get your pretty little ass cleaned up before I keep you in this bed all day.”

“Maybe I want you to, Daddy,” you moaned arching your back.

“Y/N, I’m not gonna warn you again,” he growled.

“Fine,” you giggled, getting up “you can make it up to me tonight.”

“I’ll make it up to you in 2 hours,” he smirked.

You quickly cleaned yourself up and got dressed in your clothes, stuffed your phone in your pocket, before going downstairs and cleaning up the mess you two made the night before. You’d just put the clothes upstairs in the master bedroom when you heard a knock on the door. You were a little confused but thought nothing of it as you made your way to the front door.

“Hello, how may we h-help...Ryan?” you questioned as you stumbled a little. What the fuck?

“Hey babe!” he smiled brightly “I though I’d surprise you and Hugh!”

“Why?” you wondered aloud before you could stop yourself.

“I missed you and I figured I could make things right with Hugh by taking everyone out for lunch.”

“Ryan, we’re working-”

“I’m sure you both could use a break,” Ryan interrupted as he made his way inside. “This place is fucking gorgeous!”

“I know,” you muttered, closing the door behind you.

You knew you had no reason to be, but you were angry. Furious. The Hamptons was you and Ransom’s alone, and Ryan was ruining it.

“How did you even find us?”

“I asked Steve to look up a house in the Hamptons registered to Hugh Ransom Drysdale. He found the address within an hour.”

“Good old Steve,” you scowled, remembering how much you really couldn’t stand his cop friends.

“Okay, so I was thinking that maybe we’d...Ryan,” Ransom stopped short on the stairs, his entire demeanor changing instantly. He clenched his fists and his jawline tightened. “What are you doing here?”

“Wanted to take everyone out for lunch and I was hoping you and I could start over,” he smiled, hopeful.

“As great as that sounds, we both have a lot of work to do.”

“I’m sure you two have time for a break.”

“How did you even find my house?”

“One of his cop buddies looked it up for him,” you muttered, as you started picking at your fingers.

Ransom’s phone started ringing and he looked from you to Ryan before looking down at it. “Fuck, I have to take this,” he muttered before storming into the kitchen then making his to his backyard, slamming the door shut.

“He seems pissed,” Ryan scoffed.

“Yeah, and I don’t blame him. This is kinda fucked up, Ryan.”

“I’m just trying to do a good thing-”

“Ryan, you had someone look up his address, you come over unannounced, you’re basically trying to force a friendship on him that he doesn’t want-”

“I’m trying to make amends!”

“He doesn’t like you, Ryan! He doesn’t like you and he has every reason not to!”

“Babe, I’m trying to make things right. Besides, if he’s important enough to get you take a week off from planning our wedding, I should make the effort to make things right, shouldn’t I?”

“This isn’t how you go about doing it,” you muttered, grabbing your phone as it buzzed for the millionth time.

Shithead: This is our home, what the fuck is he doing here?!

Shithead: He can’t fucking be here, Princess. He just can’t be.

Shithead: Get him out of here.

Shithead: Listen, I know none of this is your fault, Princess. I’m sorry, but he just can’t fucking be here. He has to go.

“Fuck,” you muttered, putting your phone back into your pocket. “Let me go and talk to him. Just sit down and watch TV or something.”

“Baby, I didn’t mean to-”

“Yeah, I know, Ryan. I know,” you huffed as you made your way into the kitchen.

Ransom was pacing in the kitchen and you could tell he was doing all he could not to destroy everything in his path. “Who the fuck does he think he is?!” Ransom hissed as quietly as he could. “Who just shows up to someone’s house like this?! This is our house!”

“Ransom, it’s not like I told him to come here!”

“I know you didn’t,” he sighed, wrapping his arms around you.

“Ransom stop, he’s right out there,” you warned softly, weakly pushing him off of you.

“He’s in our house.”

And I’m his fiancee,” you countered with a sigh. Only you would get yourself in a situation like this.

“I want him gone.”

“Ransom, he’s not going anywhere until he takes us out for food.”

“Fine, but if he’s getting what he wants, I wanna get what I want,” he propositioned with a devilish grin.

“You just had me!”

“Yeah, and my fucking plan was to get you on that boat, talk a little then have you ride my face,” he whispered against your neck before biting it as his hands worked on undoing your shorts.

“Fuck,” you moaned softly. “We can’t! What if he catches us?”

“Just keep quiet. I know my good girl can be quiet for me, right?” he questioned as he got on his knees and pulled your shorts down. “Daddy just wants a taste,” he mumbled before diving between your legs.

A quiet gasp escaped your lips as you arched your back. If your past actions weren’t going to send you to hell, you were sure that this would do the trick. What made it worse was that you got off on it. A part of you wanted Ryan to catch you and Ransom because you wanted to hurt him. He’d hurt you so many times that if you could just make him feel an ounce of pain that he inflicted onto you, it would bring you so much more satisfaction than it should.

The other part of you just wanted to be with Ransom, and if Ryan caught you two, it would’ve made the breakup all that much easier. You knew Ryan would never really confess to cheating on you (he loved giving half truths), but you could deal with him hating you as long as you finally got to be Ransom’s again.

“Shit!” you cried softly as Ransom slipped two fingers inside of you. You kicked off one of your sandals and stepped out of the right pant leg of your shorts, before hooking that leg over Ransom’s shoulder. “So fucking close, baby,” you whimpered quietly.

All Ransom did was pick up the pace with both his tongue and fingers, using his other hand to grip you tight. You squeezed his hair tight and pulled him closer to you, and when you felt his nails dig into your thighs, you knew he was doing best to keep quiet.

“Fuck!” you breathed out as you came hard all over his tongue, your free hand gripping his shoulder extremely hard.

Ransom stayed in-between your legs, cleaning you up at a leisurely pace, as you slowly came down from your high. You relished every moment of his desperate desire to please you.

“I’ll go out first,” you exhaled softly with a small chuckle as Ransom kissed his way back up your body as he brought your shorts up with him.

“You sure you can stand?” he laughed before kissing your lips.

“Shut up,” you giggled, playfully pushing him off. “Just be nice for lunch and we can get back to where we were. Talking,” you pointed teasingly, before turning to walk away.

“Just,” Ransom called softly as he grabbed your wrist “just don’t change your mind. Don’t make a decision,” he pleaded softly.

That pulled on your heartstrings much more than you would’ve liked.

Ryan made reservations at ‘Si Si Mediterranean Restaurant’ and you all got there just in time. He wanted to take the boat there, but Ransom came up with a bullshit reason as to why you all couldn’t. Something to do with the engine or rudder. You couldn’t bring yourself to focus because you were consumed with guilt. Your fiancee had gotten you and your ex-boyfriend lunch reservations to try and make things right, and the entire time you were just waiting for him to leave so you and Ransom could get back to figuring out what you two were and what you two would do.

Because, at the end of the day, that’s all it was: you and Ransom, selfishly trying to find a way to work things out, to be together again. You were silly to think that you could spend a week with Ransom and believe that nothing would happen between you two. In all honesty, you always knew you’d fall easily for him again, but lying to yourself had become one of your new favorite things.

“I hope you don’t mind, Ransom,” Ryan smiled once you all were seated, “I’m not sure what kind of food you like, but I know Y/N love Mediterranean food.”

“I’ve been to a lot of outings with her family,” Ransom smiled condescendingly, “I know all of her favorite places in Marlborough and in general.”

“I could tell by the menu you put together for our little dinner party,” Ryan smiled as he squeezed your hand gently.

The second the waiter came by. You asked for a Si Si Tai and slipped him a $200 tip to keep them coming.

The entire time Ransom and Ryan basically kept comparing dick sizes, you kept your sunglasses on and eyes on the water, trying to imagine you were anywhere else. Trying to imagine a better version of yourself, that you hadn’t let yourself become someone who was okay with sneaking and lying.

A cheater.

You found it funny that the one thing you’d left Ransom for was the one thing you were willing to commit with him.

“Babe, you okay?” Ryan asked you, pulling you out of your thoughts, looking at you with concern in his eyes.

“Yeah, everything’s fine,” you lied with a faux smile. “Why, what’s up?”

“The waiter asked you for your order...like 3 times,” he smiled sheepishly.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you laughed, quickly glancing at the menu. It’s not even like you were all that hungry. “I’ll take the lamb burger,” you smiled up at the waiter.

“Funny. Ransom said that’s what you’d want,” Ryan chuckled humorlessly to himself as the waiter walked away.

“What can I say? The man knows me,” you mused before taking a big sip of your Si Si Tai.

“Yeah, how do you two know each other? I mean, I know he works with your father but-”

“Harlan, his grandfather, introduced my dad to the whole family, and he and Ransom really to hit it off,” feeling the slightest bit of anger at the memory of how you first met Ransom.

“What do you-”

“Y/N’s father used to be a real piece of shit, and so was I. I guess, in a way, I still am,” Ransom interrupted as you shifted uncomfortably in your seat. Ransom sensed your anger and uneasiness and continued. “Her father decided that he liked me because I could get him all of the things he wanted, whether he should’ve had them or not.”

“And you two still became friends?” Ryan scoffed, taking a sip of his scotch, clearly enjoying being the cause of friction between you and Ransom.

“Well, we had a really long talk one night and it helped both of us see things in a different light,” Ransom smirked as he took a sip of his whiskey. “Things changed from then on.”

You smiled to yourself, remembering the night Ransom was talking about, taking note of that’s when your feelings towards him began to change. “Can we talk about something else? Remembering how my dad used to be a flaming pile of trash isn’t something I really wanna do today.”

“You’re right babe, I’m sorry,” Ryan smiled regretfully as Ransom rolled his eyes. “What do you wanna talk about?”

“The Patriots lineup is looking pretty promising for this season,” you smirked before taking a small sip of your drink.

“Babe, you know I hate it when-”

“You really think they have a chance?” Ransom laughed. “After last season, with the way they played against the Chiefs...”

“It was a rough year, but it wasn’t completely terrible. They’ll bounce back!”

“Whatever you say, Princess,” Ransom laughed before downing his whiskey while he signaled for another.

The rest of brunch went off without a hitch, but that didn’t mean there weren’t uncomfortable moments. Ryan felt out of place, which in turn made you feel a little bad for him. He was trying so hard though. He really wanted you to see, to know he was trying.

After he settled the bill, Ryan drove everyone back to Ransom’s. Ransom was quick to get out of the car, telling you that he’d set up a work space for you two before quickly going inside, barely waving goodbye to Ryan.

“I don’t know how much work he thinks you’ll get done like this,” Ryan chuckled softly as he looked you over. “I know that me coming here threw a wrench in the works, but I needed to see for myself.”

“See what?”

“That everything was okay. That we’re okay.”

“Ryan-”

“Listen, I know I haven’t been the best boyfriend or fiancee, but we’ve been doing better. I’m trying my best to be and do better.”

“What’s your point?”

“I know you don’t believe that he has an angle, but please just trust me: I know he does and I know he won’t treat you right.”

“Stop it-”

“Baby, please just-”

“What was any of this supposed to prove, Ryan? What was the purpose?”

“That I fucking love you and you love me!” he snapped before stomping his foot.

“Why is it that you only care now? Why does it took someone else coming along for you to realize that you love me so much?”

“Because I never had a reason to worry! I’ve always known how much I love you, why do you think I waited for you? I’ve always known you were the one for me and then when I finally got you, I just got comfortable and careless. And I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry. I won’t take you for granted ever again. I love you and I can’t wait till we’re married,” he smiled weakly, tears welled in both corners of his eyes.

“I have to get inside,” you muttered as you turned to walk away.

“Just please,” he begged softly, grabbing your wrist, “don’t forget what I’ve said. Don’t fall for him, it’s all just a game to him. You’re just a prize to him and he’ll never love you like I do. No one will,” he finished softly, giving you a small kiss on the cheek as he let go of your wrist.

All you did was nod before turning and going into the house. Ransom was standing in the living area with a cigarette lit and you knew you couldn’t talk to him just yet.

“I need a minute,” was all you said before going into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of wine, and making your way out back.

You sat by the pool and let the events of the day, the ghosts of past words spoken, roll around in your head. It was only 4pm and you were exhausted.

You knew that Ransom truly loved you, but he’d truly loved you before and he still shattered your heart. Ryan really had been trying to do better, but Ransom telling you that he was only in it for the money had you seeing things differently.

Ryan had always been obsessed with money and status.

As you continued to drink and wallow in self pity, ‘Run the Road’ started playing and you couldn’t help but laugh. The first time you’d heard the song was five years ago while you and Ransom were out clubbing in the Hamptons. It was the second night that you two had spent in the Hamptons, and Ransom was extremely possessive over you. He practically growled at every guy that approached you on the dance floor while he loved seeing how much they all hated him for having you.

“You’re all mine aren’t you?” he whispered hotly in your ear that night, as you swayed your hips to the music, your back ironed against his chest.

“Mhm, all yours Ransom,” you drunkenly giggled as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

“Can any of these guys fuck you?”

“No, only you,” you moaned as his hands traveled up and over your clothed breasts.

“That’s right,” he chuckled, as one of his hands snaked up and around your neck. “You’re my good girl. Look and see how jealous they all are,” he demanded softly.

You giggled a little when you bothered to remember that you two were in public and looked around at all the guys with lust and envy in their eyes. “You like showing me off, huh?”

“I love showing you off, Princess. Get to do it for a fucking week,” he chuckled as he gripped your hip and pulled you impossibly closer to him and you felt just how much he loved it. “I’ll never get tired of this pretty little cunt. I’ll never get tired of you,” he husked against the shell of your ear before nipping at it.

“Keep this up and we’ll give them a real show,” you moaned, your excitement building.

“They don’t deserve a show,” he muttered as he took notice of all the guys that were watching the two of you. “If one more of those fuckers tries to dance with you though, I’ll break their fuckin’ neck,” he growled.

“Lets get you off the dance floor,” you giggled, reluctantly freeing yourself from his hold while you turned to face him.

The memory made you laugh and smile because you remembered what came after; it also broke your heart. Ransom was extremely possessive and protective over you before he had the balls to finally tell you how he truly felt. Meanwhile, only a few short weeks ago, Ryan basically told you that he’s fine with you cheating because people need to have their fun.

“I half expected to find you with a cigarette,” Ransom commented softly, breaking you out of your thoughts as he took a seat next to you.

“Give it some time,” you sniffled softly, with a sad chuckle as you wiped your eyes with the back of your hand.

“Princess-”

“Ransom please don’t. Please.”

“You can’t go back to him.”

“I should just go home.”

“Please don’t. Not yet.”

“Ransom, we can’t do this. I can’t do this! What the fuck is wrong with me?!” you exclaimed, finally letting your tears flow freely. “When did I become this selfish? This much of a coward? This isn’t fair to either of you and I’m just trying to pretend-”

“I’m the one who asked you here, I’m the one who kissed you, and I’m the one who is selfishly begging you to stay. I know how much you love me and I keep hoping that it’ll just be enough to...”

When you saw Ransom’s own tears starting to fall, it made you feel even worse. “I don’t want to hurt you and I don’t want to give you false hope.”

“Then just stay with me!”

“Ransom...if he’s trying, I have to try, too.”

“No, you really fucking don’t. He’s a piece of shit and fuck...just stay here with me. We can start over and we can make it work this time. I know we can.”

“I love you so much. God, I love you so much it fucking hurts,” you smiled weakly as you took his face in your hand.

All Ransom did was pull you pull close and hold you tight as you both cried. It felt like you were leaving him all over again.

At some point, you fell asleep and Ransom must have carried you back to the master bedroom, because when you woke up you were alone in the dark. You slowly crept out of the bed and tiptoed down the stairs, not wanting to disturb Ransom since you didn’t know what he was doing. You saw the TV light illuminating the living area and you took a deep breath before making your way in.

You were about to ask him to talk when you noticed your phone on the coffee table in front of him. “I didn’t go through your phone,” Ransom stated softly, as if he were reading your mind, but his eyes never left the screen. “Ryan wouldn’t stop calling and texting you, so I brought your phone down here with me and text him from my phone telling him that you were asleep.”

“Thank you,” you stated softly, starting to fumble with your fingers. “I’m gonna start packing and-”

“Please don’t,” Ransom begged softly, still not looking at you.

“It’s better if I do.”

“No, it really isn’t.”

“Ransom-”

“Y/N, I’ve come to terms with the fact that you’re not gonna choose me and it’s what I deserve, that’s fine. I have to accept that, but I’m losing you all over again and I’m just not there yet. I’m...” he cleared his throat before finally turning to meet your gaze, eyes puffy and red. “Just stay for the rest of the week, please? If this is the last time I can be with you, truly be with you, just let me have it, please?”

How were you supposed to say no to him? It’s not even like you wanted to go back anyway. You said nothing as you sat down next to Ransom and he pulled you close. Both of your hearts were breaking all over again, so why not stay with the one person who truly understood what you were going through?

For the rest of the night, Ransom just held you and pressed soft kisses into your hair and kept telling you how much he loved you, while he quietly sobbed. In return, you just sobbed into his chest and held him as tight as you could, wishing you were strong enough to trust him again.

The rest of the week was spent arguing, crying, making love, and pretending. Pretending that life as a couple went on after the week was over. Pretending that the wedding plans your mother was always calling to tell you about (you left her in charge after the venue change because you truly didn’t care anymore), were for your and Ransom’s wedding. Pretending that whenever you spoke to Ryan and told him ‘I love you’, you were just saying it to someone who was an on and off again friend.

Pretending that you two weren’t the people you actually were, and that things hadn’t gotten fucked up all those years ago.

When Friday came, you were determined to stay in bed, trying to hold off Saturday for as long as possible.

“No, we’re getting up and doing things,” Ransom chuckled, as he peppered kisses up and down your cheek and neck.

“No, because that will make the day go faster and tomorrow will get here-”

“Tomorrow can fuck off. I’m not spending today in bed and moping with you. We’re going on the boat,” he quipped before getting up and putting on the pair of boxers you practically ripped out of him the night before.

“And if I refuse to drive it?” you huffed, sitting up and crossing your arms.

“Won’t matter, because I got a boating license,” he smirked as you laughed and flipped him off.

Nonetheless, you reluctantly got out of bed and took a shower before slipping into one of Ransom’s favorite sundresses, and slipping your phone into your pocket.

“You remember what happened the last time you wore that dress,” Ransom smirked as you came down the steps.

“You will behave and treat me like a lady, Mr.Drysdale,” you taunted with a coy finger wag.

“We both know you prefer it when I treat you like the little slut you are.”

“Are you trying to end up back in the bedroom?”

“You started it, not me,” he laughed as grabbed a bottle of wine and a picnic basket. “You ready, Princess?”

You just giggled and nodded.

The ride to the marina was light and free. You forced yourself to put the next day off as much as you could. You just wanted to be with Ransom, in the moment.

“Alright, I have to ask because it’s been bothering me,” you sighed, settling into the boat’s center council as Ransom dropped anchor in the middle of the ocean. “I know your restaurants are successful, and you have money in stocks and blah blah blah, but-”

“How am I able to afford this house out here and my house in Marlborough?” he chuckled as the low growl of the engine slowly faded. He made his way over to you.

“Mhm,” you nodded as you poured both glasses of wine.

“I became a stripper after you left me,” he sighed heavily as you choked on your wine. “I couldn’t fucking help it, I’m so sorry, baby,” your hysterical reaction made him laugh so hard he almost fell over.

“You’re such a shithead!” you laughed, cleaning up any spilled wine droplets that landed on the wood panels.

“And you love it,” he smiled before kissing you. “No, in all honesty, Harlan gave me half of Walt’s inheritance,” he smirked, taking a drink himself.

“What?!”

“Well, after the last time I fucked up, I knew I had to make serious changes. Without going into detail, I told Harlan about my plan to open up a restaurant and wanting to branch off on my own. I didn’t go to him for money, because I needed to do this on my own to show both you and myself that I was capable of doing it. I just wanted to bounce ideas off him and get his feedback. When I finally got to work on the restaurant, he told me he was impressed and proud of me for doing something on my own. He was also pissed off at Walt, and has been for a while, because he won’t do anything on his own. He waits for whatever Harlan feeds him then wants to try and force his ideas on him instead of just creating something on his own. So, he told me that he wants to put his money to better use, so he gave me half of Walt’s inheritance,” Ransom finished with a shrug before downing the rest of his wine. He poured himself another glass.

“Why Hugh Ransom Drysdale, you little shit!” you laughed and smiled. “But how did you get him to give it to you early? It’s an inheritance.”

“I asked him for it upfront, because I wanted the mansion before I’d have to go into a fucking bidding war. I explained that all of my money was going into the restaurant and that I really wanted to make an offer. He was hesitant at first, but he saw how dedicated I really was and how seriously I was taking it, and gave me the money. Pissed Walt off and made Harlan proud at the same time,” he chuckled.

“I’m really proud of you, babe,” you smiled softly.

“Yeah? You wanna show me how proud you are?” He smiled devilishly.

“As much as I would love that,” you giggled, “we’re not as alone as we were the last time we did this.” you nodded towards the young adults laughing and going by on their jet skis and own yachts.

“They’re just a bunch of spoiled little fuck heads.”

“You were once one of those spoiled little fuck heads,” you laughed.

“Oh, I’m an old fuck head now?”

“Older, baby. You don’t fuck like an old man at all.”

“Then put my ego at ease right now,” he smirked as he put his wine glass down and slowly made his way over to you.

“Ransom, people will most definitely see!”

“It’s not like you give a fuck and you know I don’t,” he husked as one of his hands sneaked under your dress and started to rub your clit teasingly. “No panties? Oh Princess, you’re fucking begging to be fucked out in the open. You want everyone to know who this pussy belongs to, don’t you?” he teased.

“Yes,” you moaned, arching your back a little. “Fuck, Ransom!” you cried as he slid two fingers inside of you.

“Such a good little slut for me,” he groaned before dipping down and kissing you deeply.

“Take that inside!” one of the boys on a passing boat yelled.

“Can I join?!” another girl yelled.

“I fucking hate young people,” Ransom mumbled against your lips as he used his free hand to flip them off and you started laughing. “I’m gonna kill them. I’m going to kill all of them.”

“I thought you didn’t mind being watched,” you laughed, trying to catch your breath.

“I don’t give a fuck who watches, but be grateful you get to see at all and shut the fuck up,” he huffed, sitting up and pulling his fingers out of you.

“Oh sweetie,” you moaned with a soft laugh.

“Fuck, I am becoming a grumpy old man,” he groaned as you laughed harder.

“Oh baby, I have a surprise for you tonight that won’t have you feeling old at all. I won’t let you.”

“Does it involve me being deep inside that tight little asshole?”

“If you play your cards right,” you smirked before taking his two fingers into your mouth and sucking and licking them clean.

“Shit!” he groaned, palming himself over his shorts “keep this up and I’ll show every one of those little shits how to fuck!”

“Patience, my love,” you laughed after you finished cleaning off his fingers. “Lets go back home and get ready for tonight.”

“No, because I made your favorite for lunch and I-”

“You made me a Cuban melt?! I fucking love you!” you exclaimed, tackling him with a hug.

“I love you too, Princess,” he laughed, wrapping you in a hug that was just as tight.

“See? I want a love just like that!” a girl exclaimed as another boat went by.

Lunch went so well that neither of you wanted to head back, but you really wanted to take Ransom out. Yeah, it would be noisy and rowdy, but it would be worth it in the end.

“What should I wear for tonight?” he called from the bedroom as you put your makeup on in the bathroom.

“Fun casual,” you smirked as you touched up your lip liner.

“What the fuck did you do?”

“Just trust me,” you laughed, finishing up and making your way out of the bathroom.

“You look like that and expect me to want to go out?”

“Lets go, my little horn ball.”

“I fucking love you, did you know that?”

“I had a feeling,” you smirked as the car service pulled up. “Lets go, baby.”

The first stop was the first place he took you out for dinner, The Palm in the East Hamptons, and he was happily shocked. You both talked about your future plans as if you were going to be together when they happened. He took your hand in his often and kissed the top of it as much as you’d let him, before it was time to move on to the next place.

“You’re so fucking funny, did you know that?” he laughed as the car pulled up to MARS. The bar that changed everything for the both of you.

“I just wanted to see you smile, baby,” you laughed as you both made your way out of the car.

“You found the perfect way to do that,” he grinned.

You both spent the night pretending that you both weren’t as old as you actually were, dancing and drinking, ignoring the voices in your head that kept telling you that it would all be over in a few hours. All that mattered in that moment was Ransom and how you both made each other feel complete.

“I wanna take you home,” Ransom slurred slightly in your ear, as you continued to grind your hips against his as you two danced to whatever Ariana Grande song had been remixed.

“Home sounds nice,” you giggled, turning around in his hold and looking up at him as you wrapped your arms around his neck. “Our home.”

“That’s right, baby. Our home,” he smiled sincerely.

The minute you two got inside, Ransom was all over you, pulling your dress off as you furiously worked to unbutton his shirt. You both were toeing off your shoes instantly as you did your best to unbutton and unzip his pants. In one swift move, he was hoisting you up as you wrapped your legs around him, carrying you to the bedroom.

Ransom loved you repeatedly that night and it felt like heaven. At one point, you couldn’t help but start to cry, because you knew the fairy tale would be over soon. Ransom just kissed them away as he continued to thrust into you relentlessly.

“Just be here with me right now. Tomorrow can wait till just then,” he moaned with a weak smile.

You tried to fight off sleep, but Ransom held you close and whispered sweet nothings in your ear. You were fast asleep within’ minutes.

When you awoke the next morning, Ransom was awake and watching you, stroking the side of your face softly as the gentle Spring breeze kissed the room.

“I don’t mean to be creepy, I just wanted to enjoy this moment for as long as possible,” he smiled softly, though his puffy red eyes let you know that he’d been crying.

“No, you’re fine. This is nice...everything has been so nice,” you whispered, trying to fight back your own tears. “I should get up and pack,” you sniffled after you cleared your throat.

“I packed your things while you were sleeping, please just stay here with me for a bit. If this is it, I just want us to...lets just live in this for a little bit longer.”

“We can do that,” you nodded as a lone tear escaped your eye.

“You’re so beautiful when you’re asleep. You’re so peaceful.”

“That’s only when I fall asleep next to you,” you chuckled softly.

“Waking up next to you every day would be perfect,” he smiled, cupping your face in his hand as you kissed his wrist softly. “What do you think our wedding would’ve been like?”

“We would’ve eloped in Paris,” you laughed as he used to his thumb to wipe away another one of your tears.

“Paris, huh?”

“Mhm, we have to make something about it at least a little romantic. No annoying families, no unwanted guests, no big to-do...just us in Paris. Saying ‘I Do’ and living happily ever after.”

“I like that a lot.”

“I thought you would.”

“Y/N, please don’t go. We can do this...make this work.”

“Ransom, please don’t make this any harder than it already is.”

“If it’s so hard, you should just stay!”

“I can’t. I just can’t,” you sobbed, leaning into his touch.

Ransom said nothing. He just pulled you closer as he kissed you deeply, the pain in his heart evident by his grip on you.

“You are perfect to me...for me. I love you,” he whispered against your lips.

You and Ransom loved each other with all that you each had, leaving each other spent, as your lonely, quiet sobs and moans filled the room. After all was said and done, you forced yourself out of Ransom’s hold and got dressed. Ransom wordlessly watched you as he tried to keep his crying to a minimum. You gave him one final kiss before grabbing your bag and leaving.

As you sat in your car, you contemplated going back inside and just staying with him. You knew you couldn’t. For as much as you loved Ransom, you’d loved him that much before and it hadn’t been enough.

The entire drive back to your apartment you cried as if the most precious person in your world had been taken from you; because as far as you were concerned, he had.

From that day on, you did your best to force yourself into a roll that you just didn’t fit in to. You fake laughed and smiled as everyone in the office counted down to your wedding. You pretended to be happy every time your mother(s) told you about changes they’d made in designs and color schemes. You pretended it didn’t matter when they took out peonies from the bridal bouquet, because it didn’t matter to you anymore. None of it mattered.

When Ryan made love to you, you always pretended to be somewhere else, with someone else. When he showed you houses he was interested in, you barely offered any feedback. When he gave a heartfelt speech at the rehearsal dinner, you just smiled and nodded along with everyone else, because that’s what you were supposed to do. The tears you cried were real, however. No, you weren’t crying over Ryan’s words, but because everything was all wrong. Ryan was never supposed to be your husband. It was never supposed to get as far as it did; you just didn’t have the strength or courage to stop your life from taking the turn it did.

Which is why you’re currently sitting in the bridal suite, looking for a fire escape before the heat consumes you, but what choice do you have? At this point, you truly feel as if you don’t deserve Ransom, and Ryan is just...he’s just okay. There are much worse men that you could’ve settled for at the end of the day. You keep trying to force yourself to come to terms with your choice all while the last bit of fight within you keeps screaming: run for the hills, as fast as you can.

‘Run to Ransom,’ you tell yourself mentally.

Why can’t anything ever be simple? Why can’t love ever be kind to you?

Ransom’s P.O.V.

There’s a different kind of pain you feel when you know you’re about to lose the love of your life to entitled piece of shit. Then again, I guess I’m an entitled piece of shit; takes one to know one and all of that. That’s really the reason I treated Y/N like shit. I knew that I loved you and that I’d eventually get my shit together. I just expected you to wait.

Because that’s what I wanted, and I always get my way.

At least, I did before you came along and changed everything. In my defense (as if I actually have one), how was I supposed to know that you’d be all consuming and soul stirring? Yeah, I knew what I felt for you was more than lust, but I’d never been in love before. Love is for fools, but God what a fucking fool I am.

I took you for granted, but I swore that if you took me back (again), I’d never do it again. I finally got it. I finally understood why everyone searched for love so desperately. Out of all the drugs I’ve ever done, love was definitely the most addictive and consuming.

But then you left.

Just vanished into thin air. I told myself I had a reason to be angry. A reason to be hurt. In reality, I was only ever angry with myself because I pushed you to it. It took time, but I used that pain to do better for you. To be better for you. The only problem? You never came back. I kept waiting and asking, but no one would tell me anything other than that you were happy, and that I needed to leave you alone. Something inside of me told me that you weren’t. I wish I could explain it, and maybe it was just me selfishly hoping that you weren’t. Maybe I was trying to make it easier to get you to come back to me, even though I knew you wouldn’t.

I tried to move on, focus on other things and other women, but none of them were you. It all felt hallow.

Then, it was as if God was finally listening, because I found out that you were coming home. The only problem was you were engaged. I couldn’t believe it and I had to see it for myself. I set up a fake meeting with your father, just so I could see you. I needed to see for myself that you were happy and okay. I told myself that if you were happy, I’d force myself to be strong enough and move on; that seeing you one last time would be the end of it. The moment I saw you coming down that grand staircase, I fell in love with you all over again. It was the single most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen, and I truly believe God took more time making you than He did anyone else.

Even for as gorgeous as you looked, I saw the truth behind the smile you wore that night. It almost seemed overly rehearsed, and your eyes looked like you were on auto-pilot. So I decided to stay close by, but out of sight: I needed to find out what exactly was doing this to you, making you so unhappy. Then I heard how he spoke to you. How he yelled at you, spoke down to you, and dismissed your feelings. I didn’t mean to barge in on you two, but all of the raised voices sounded as if things were about to get violent. I would’ve murdered him on the spot if he would’ve laid a finger on you.

The way you looked at me that night though...it was everything, because you couldn’t just be angry. No, there was a hint of longing, of happiness. Love even dared to give a hint of itself away.

I truly hadn’t meant to bring up the past when I got you alone that night, but it had been so long and I had so many questions. So many grievances.

As if I had any right.

You lied and told me you didn’t love me, which I of course coerced out of you because I never know when to stop, but it pissed me off nonetheless. How could you try to lie to me like I wouldn’t be able to tell? Jesus, I know I hurt you, but telling me you don’t love me anymore? That was below the belt.

In all my rage, anger, and self-pity, I announced that stupid dinner party for you two because maybe there was something I was missing. Maybe he really was good for you, and I just witnessed you two having a bad night. The scowl on your face the next day let me know that was bullshit. He treated you like shit the entire time you two were there and it made my blood boil. I told you I was sorry and I meant it. I was trying to show you that I’d changed, and I was pretending that I didn’t understand why you wouldn’t even look my way. I was selfish, I was angry, and I was hurt. So when Diana told me that you were smoking in the coat check room, of course I had to barge in and make a fuss. However, the way you looked in that dress...how was I supposed to stop myself?

It was like the first time all over again. You were just as needy and desperate as I was, unable to control myself just like you had no control; an infinitely satisfying, irresistible, intoxicating chaos. You felt like home because you were home, to and for me. Everything that I had been looking for with other women finally made sense when I was with you, like you are an answer to the questions inside my heart.

I knew I pushed too far when I made you admit that you loved me more than you love him, but I needed to hear it. After you gave me what I needed with that confession, I tried to give you what you needed: a quick and easy release, no strings attached.

The only problem? I’m a selfish fuck.

There’s no way I could let you go after you finally admitted that you still loved me, so in my infinite wisdom, had to push and get you to come to our place in the Hamptons. Just when I thought I had you again, he came along and took you away. Well, he had you at least attempting it again, which meant that there was a chance that things could still workout the way we both really wanted them to.

However, you never cracked. You didn’t text or call me asking me to come and get you, you never showed up at my door and asked me to whisk you away. You didn’t even come by the restaurant. I kept holding my breath and hoping for the best until last night when I finally caved.

“You can’t let her marry him, Sam!” I exclaimed as soon as she answered the phone.

“Ransom, she’s in the other room! I can’t do this right now because she’s barely holding it together-”

“Which is why you need to convince her to call it off!”

“So what? She can marry you?”

“Sam, I know you hate me and don’t want her with me, but we’re on the same fucking page. You know just as well as I do that he’s no good for her!”

Sam let out a heavy sigh before responding. “I know you’re right, Ransom, but I’ve talked to her about it multiple times. She’s dead set on this because she feels like she has to do it. I don’t know what’s not computing in her head, especially after the week she spent with you-”

“She told you about that?”

“She tells me every thing, Ransom. Of course I know about the week she spent with you.”

“What did she say about that weekend?”

“Ransom-”

“Even you have to admit that I’m not the same man I was before, Samantha. You know that all I want for her is the best and that I truly do love her. I’m trying to look out for her and-”

“Ransom, I know! I fucking know but I’m torn! Neither one of you are actually worth her time, but in telling you what she cried to me about...I just know it won’t be good,” she finished with a sigh.

Sam was right. Here I am, sitting in my bed, cigarette lit, as I contemplate fucking up your life or not.

You may end up hating me, but sometimes love is selfish and confusing. I’ve accepted that you won’t choose me, but I love you too much to let you go and watch you destroy yourself.

I’ve gotta put a stop to this.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

‘You’ve come this far, you just have to go through with it,’ you think to yourself as you try to get yourself ready to walk down the isle. ‘This will work. It has to work.’

“God, you look so gorgeous,” an all too familiar deep voice practically whispered from the doorway.

“Ransom, what are you doing here?!” you snap quietly, quickly turning your attention to him. “You can’t be here!”

“You can’t marry him, princess. You just...don’t pick me, fine, but you know that marrying him won’t do you any good.”

“Everyone’s already here and everything’s been paid for-”

“Stop making excuses!” Ransom interjects, forcing himself to keep his composure. “You know you don’t want this! You don’t want him! Look at all of this shit! You don’t even like more than half of the people here!” he almost shouts as he makes his way over to you. “Y/N-”

“Ransom, please don’t make this harder than it already is-”

“It shouldn’t have to be hard! Baby, please don’t do this!” Ransom begs as he gets on his knees and your tears start to fall. “We can leave right now and you do whatever you want, be with whoever you want, but I can’t watch you do this to yourself. I can’t let you destroy yourself because of what I did,” Ransom pleads as his own tears start to fall.

“I can’t just-”

“Sunshine, it’s...oh God,” your father mutters as you both turn your gaze to the doorway and see both him and your mother standing there. “Son-”

“Don’t let her do this,” Ransom demands, his tears falling freely as he stands up. “You know just as well as I do that this marriage is going to kill her. It’s going to take whatever light is left in her and destroy it! I know this is my fault but-”

“The choice is Y/N’s,” your mother interrupts softly, trying to hold back her own tears. “If she says this is for the best...”

“But we all know this isn’t!” Ransom interrupts harshly. “She knows it isn’t, don’t you?” he asks as his gaze goes back to you.

You look from him to your parents before taking a deep breath. “I’ll be fine, Ransom. I’m not yours to worry about. We had our chance and now it’s time for me to move on-”

“This isn’t even about me, Y/N! I just...I love you so much and I can’t just-”

“My mind is made up,” you sniffle out before drying your eye with the back pf your hand. “I love you. Thank you, but I’ll be fine,” you smile meekly before giving him a soft kiss on the cheek, walking over to your parents.

“Y/N-”

“I have to let you go, Ransom. I just have to,” you sob mournfully as you adjust your posture and look straight ahead.

Why do you have to be so stubborn? Why can’t you just forgive and take him back?

‘Remember what happened the last time you did that? The only thing you can do is move forward and hope for the best’ you mentally tell yourself as you start to walk down the isle.

The heat of everyone’s gaze has you wishing you were anywhere else. Ryan flashes you a smile and you feel sick. All of it feels wrong. Your mother went with roses, which you hate because everyone has roses. The bridesmaid dresses are cream colored and you just want to set them all on fire, because who the fuck decided that was okay?

‘Probably Ryan’s mom,’ you scoff mentally.

The venue is loud and stupid, you don’t like half the people there, you hate the dress you’re in, and you’re not head over heels for the man that’s in front of you. It isn’t the man you want.

‘You’re already here, there’s nothing else to do but hope for the best. Love, genuine deep and soul consuming love, will come...I hope,’ you repeat to yourself mentally as the priest starts on his little speech about love and the sanctity of marriage.

As the priest goes on, you start to think about your future and all of the big moments that are to come, and Ryan was by your side in none of them. It was only Ransom.

It’s always Ransom.

At some point, you found yourself muttering ‘I do’, though you didn’t really feel like you were. Your heart isn’t committing to anything, and your brain sure as shit isn’t following in line with any of it.

‘Why are you doing this? There’s literally no reason for any of this. He loves the idea of marrying you, but he doesn’t actually love you. You know better than to fall for this! Just fucking run!’ you mentally yell yourself.

“If there’s anyone here who can find reason as to why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace,” the priest happily declares.

The room is silent but you can feel Ransom’s gaze on you. You know what’s coming without even looking his way.

‘Always saving me....always breaking me,’ you chuckle internally.

“Fuck it, I’m not good enough for her but neither is this piece of shit,” Ransom huffs as he lights a cigarette. “Besides the fact she spent almost a week fucking me, she doesn’t love him. Not enough to make this sham of a marriage work. Her heart belongs to me just like mine belongs to her. That’s just how it’ll always be,” he shrugs before taking a long drag from his smoke.

“That’s bullshit! There’s no way...right, babe?” Ryan questions as his incensed gaze lands on you.

With hundreds of eyes on you, it’s time for you to make a choice. Do you go back to what you know or do you branch off into another adventure? Do you take the safe bet or do you follow your heart?

Ransom and the rest of your guests are desperately waiting to find out.

Taglist: @fuckingbye, @maroonsunrise83, @whxre4cevans

, @sweetflowerdreams,

352 notes · View notes