It just occurred to me that whatever Theseus and Asterius have going on in Hades is a near match for what Tumblr thinks "toxic yuri" means.
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I said to my friend how i was gonna draw them making out sloppy style if i beat them first try so heres middle aged immortal frat boys yaoi (i still havent beaten the game lord save me)
THIS GAME IS CHEFS KISS, GO PLAY HADES FOR EPIC GAMEPLAY AND SO MANY GAY PEOPLE
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So, in the "Hades" video game (very light spoilers for Elysium) you play as the son of Hades, Zagreus, trying to escape the Underworld. There are different levels and the boss of the Elysium level (the afterlife for heroes) is Theseus PLUS the Minotaur. Apparently, Theseus found the Minotaur in the afterlife and Asterius (the Bull of Minos) now credits Theseus with "saving" him as a person in death. They're best friends forever now and it's kind of cute.
Zagreus receives "boons" from various Olympian gods on his escapes (it is expected that you die MANY times over in this game, it's built into the story) from the Underworld. There is a boon from Aphrodite called "Aphrodite's Aid" which inflicts "Charm" on your enemies, which briefly compels your enemies to fight for you.
I had this boon in the fight against Theseus and Asterius, and the "Charm" heart ended up hitting Theseus. I usually take Asterius down first, so the "Bull of Minos" had really low health. Theseus stabbed Asterius in the back with his spear and this ended up being the DEATH BLOW.
I felt SO BAD. It is the only time so far that I have felt sorry for my actions playing this game, like, "SORRY, BRO, I DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE YOU KILL YOUR FRIEND AND PROBABLY REIGNITE OLD TRAUMA FOR THE BOTH OF YOU. IT'S IRONIC, REALLY, BUT MY BAD, MAN. MY BAD."
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Let me give him nectar let me give him nectar let me give him nectar let me give hi
PSST. IF YOU LIKE THIS AND WOULD LIKE ART OF FANDOM STUFF/YOUR OWN CHARACTERS AND SUPPORT PALESTINE, CHECK THIS OUT
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figuring out tht based on mythology hypnos would end up being asterius' nephew in law is the funniest thing in the world to me. most awkward family gathering to ever exist
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