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torturedblue · 4 months

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Just got to the end of season 1 of Rise yet again, and this time it’s really given me some extra thoughts and perspective about Leo’s behavior in the movie…

So we know at first Leo is goofing around like he usually does after the Dark Armor spits Draxum out. Undoubtedly with a huge boost of confidence from just defeating their Big Bad season 1 villain by merely creating total chaos and throwing plans out the window. After all, “we be we” right? Which leads Splinter and Raph to yell at him a lot while he just constantly insists “they’ve got this”. Which, sure, but Leo baby you have to actually fight and get focused for that to be true 😂 But it keeps Splinter’s doubts up all the while they’re moving through the Battle Nexus arc, and Leo doesn’t really get Splinter’s approval for his while big plan until he proves he knew what he was talking about all along and the Nexus crowd is cheering them on

“They love ya, Pops!”

“It was all you my son!”

They spend scene after scene with Leo insisting they’ve got this while working his Face Man routine on the Spiderwoman up until he gets thrown in the “kraken’s den” with Rat Jitsu and it’s not until then after he says it was all part of his plan and Splinter again doubts him, that Leo’s had enough of his lack of faith and failure to really pay attention to his strategies enough to say “How come no one trusts me? None of you have any faith in me, why?” Which, ouch.

And it’s kind of the same when they get back to the rest of the team. We know Raph was very unhappy with Leo bouncing on them even though the plan was actually Splinter’s, and as soon as they get back he chews Leo out for leaving them high and dry. Thus Leo’s “when I said you guys got this I meant that” speech. Raph remarks about how accurate Leo’s guesses were about how things went when they were gone, and when Shredder shows up again Raph asks if Leo’s sure about this to which he replies yet again “Trust me.” And while it may be with a confident grin, after all the previous events of the episode it makes me sad to hear the way Leo asks for trust again.

(Which, I love my guy Raph, but after watching him also doubt Leo for the whole episode it does make it hard to believe when he finally says he does)

And I could go off on a whole other tangent about Bug Busters and how Leo saw everything that Big Mama did coming beforehand unlike his brothers—like altering the terms of the deal Raph made with her at the last second—which allowed him to expect exactly that in Many Unhappy Returns and outsmart her… but I don’t think I need to.

So even though Leo doesn’t see it as much with Raph, he really had to work to earn his Sensei’s and his leader’s trust as a reliable team member. Now to be fair, he did keep his plan on the DL from Splinter up until the end, which makes it a little more unbeatable, but I always felt like he did that because someone who worked for Big Mama was always around and blabbing about what he was going to do around any of them wouldn’t have been smart.

And interestingly enough, the only episodes Raph does use him to do his Face Man thing are after all this, in Todd Scouts and Pizza Puffs, but I don’t think Raph ever did that in season one. “Go in there and do what you do best: face!” This leads me to think it’s the season 1 finale events that showed Raph Leo’s people skills and cleverness really were more useful than he thought

Looking back on all of this it really makes clear now more than ever why Leo had such hesitation about accepting his promotion to leader and acting accordingly.

Because Leo’s proven to know his family a lot better than they know him… which is actually really saddening

Even if you set aside all the other aspects of Leo being used to getting to take it easy, or seeing how when things get really serious the pressure of leadership can really get to you, or how people can actually die, like in the season 2 finale. At the end of the day we know Leo’s insecurity comes a lot from thinking his brothers or family don’t believe in him, so even after being given the leader role, how is he supposed to believe in himself?

#oops really didn’t mean to write this much #also tumblr hates me it won’t fix the video that’s supposed to be gif #this post is mad cursed I can’t edit the mistake out :)#rottmnt leo analysis #rottmnt analysis #rottmnt angst #rottmnt #tmnt #rise tmnt #save rottmnt #unpause rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #save rise of the tmnt #unpause rise of the tmnt #tmnt 2018 #rottmnt leo #rottmnt leo angst

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hotmothsummer · 2 years

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I’m gonna bet that the events of rottmnt s2 ep1 ‘Many Unhappy Returns’ is why splinter chose to make Leo the leader in finale. I’m not super happy with that decision, (even tho leo is always the leader, I liked it being raph this time!) but I really appreciate how it was set up through Many Unhappy Returns. The whole ep is basically Leo proving how clever and strategic he can be! Throughout the entire episode everyone doubts him and his abilities, and by the end he shows his competence by outsmarting Big Mama, the antagonist whose whole thing is her wicked intelligence. Leo is the face-man, he doesn’t take things seriously, he quips and makes bad puns mid-battle, that’s what rise!leo is known for, but he’s also really smart when he applies himself. I just really like this episode because you can tell that splinter starts to see what Leo can do and what he’s capable of. Also the fight scene in the battle nexus is kickass!

#moth talks #rottmnt #i just love him a lot more than I expected to #and I love this ep a lot!#is this meta?#rottmnt leo #rise leo

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danzinora-switch · 4 years

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Typing the Turtles (ROTTMNT) Part 2 - Donatello

This started out as an investigation into the turtles’ insecurities, because one thing the show does so well is demonstrate that they are still teenagers. And being a teenager is a confusing experience - there’s angst, drama, exploring one’s identity, a lot of growth, and overall figuring out who you are. That’s a messy process, too! And we see this mess in our turtles: they mess up, they’re learning, they self-doubt, they have fears and insecurities, but they’re also discovering their strengths and how to overcome their inner obstacles.

So after thinking about all this way too long, here’s my psychological breakdown of each turtle (I’ll be referencing MBTI and the Enneagram, but will include links for more general information on those if you don’t know what I’m talking about).

Donnie: INTJ, 5w6

The Architect, the Investigator, the Problem-Solver, the Observer

Firstly, getting into this analysis means that we have to step away from the stereotype that all INTJs are cold, aloof, and unemotional. INTJs, especially Turbulent ones, do express emotion, and we’ve all seen Donnie’s dramatic ‘theatre kid’ side. I’m not going to ignore that. He manages to be both thanks to the INTJ’s tertiary function Introverted Feeling (Fi). Extroverted Feeling (Fe) really allows one to connect and empathize with others’ emotions. Fi, however, is a more internal experience of feelings, and has trouble connecting with others without having been in their shoes. I happen to think Donnie is in a strong Ni-Fi loop, as well, which would make sense because fighting bad guys every day while trying to save the world after discovering a Mystic City which upbends everything you ever knew is pretty stressful. https://www.psychologyjunkie.com/2017/06/21/intjs-loop-understanding-ni-fi-loop/

And it’s super interesting that he often expresses his emotions by literally saying them. “Evil laugh! Relishing chuckle! Gasp!” (Mind Meld) and, one of my favorites, he literally says “Sad face emoji” in Many Unhappy Returns.

So while we DO see Donnie experience and display his own emotions, we also DON’T see him all that affected by other people’s emotions. He’s still pretty stoic in Mystic Mayhem after the delivery guy gets mutated, cracking a joke about imitation crab. He’s unaffected by Todd’s puppies in Repo Mantis, and the only one immune to Warren Stone’s sob story in Warren & Hypno Sitting in a Tree. Pizza Pit shows it best when he’s unaffected when Mikey’s favorite pizza place collapses until the same thing happens to him. Fi at work vs Fe.

As for Donnie being a 5w6, keep this core motivation in mind: “[Fives] Want to possess knowledge, to understand the environment, to have everything figured out as a way of defending the self from threats from the environment.” https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-5

Donnie at his Worst: Donnie vs. Witch Town gave us this gem of a line: “Because I’m the science guy! If mystic powers can do everything I can do, but better, then why would you guys even need me?” And while people have pointed out his need to be needed, I argue it’s a little more accurate to say he has a need to belong. His role in the group is the Brainiac, the Science Guy, the Smart One, and so his very identity is tied into fulfilling that role. A 5’s core fear is of being useless, helpless, or incapable. Mystic powers rendering his tech redundant, and thereby him useless, would be a pretty big threat to the security of his role in the group (that 6 wing kicking in). And remember a 5’s core motivation: to understand the environment as a defense. And he still doesn’t understand mystic energy. It’s pretty infuriating, so he’s pretty insufferable about it.

[Note: seeing mystic power as a threat probably didn’t kick in until their fight with Shredder in Many Unhappy Returns. Prior to that, his brothers were still learning how to use their magic weapons, but Donnie already understood his tech well enough to use it effectively (see their first fight against Baron Draxum in the pilot). But against the Shredder… all his tech was useless. Only the hanky, the hanky, was even marginally effective. His brothers’ weapons were now way more capable than anything he had to offer… core 5 fear. And to cope? Learn all you can about your fear/threat. Except he still hasn’t figured it out; we see even in Air Turtle that he calls Draxum for the mystic expertise instead of formulating his own hypothesis].

We’ve seen this insecurity about his place in the group before. In Mind Meld, as his brothers become more like him, his role is challenged. “Hey, you’re trying to get rid of me, that’s what I do to you!” “But, I thought purple was my... my thing.” When he first meets the Purple Dragon he immediately wants to join them because he sees them as tech peers. In Man vs Sewer even though he professes that it’s his day off, he doesn’t react well whenever Leo does ‘his thing’: analyzing the situation and drawing a conclusion. His self-worth seems to be tied to what he has to offer the group, and we hear that even in his song in The Mystic Library about proving himself.

Besides his insecurity, Donnie is practically allergic to blame. (Interestingly enough, he’s more okay with being wrong and others being right sometimes… sure he’ll deflect, but it doesn’t seem to get under his skin the way being at fault does). He will repeatedly deny fault and shift the blame to someone else when something goes wrong. He denies creating AlBearto in Al Be Back, says the incident with the Purple Dragons in The Purple Jacket is entirely April’s fault (she is not amused) and puts the blame for ditching Todd off on his brothers in Todd Scouts. The one time we see him own up his mistakes is in Mind Meld when no one (except Shelldon) is around to see it. “Yup. I beefed up.” This is definitely an area he needs to work on.

Average Donnie: Donnie cares for his brothers, but that doesn’t always get across in the best of ways. Take the episode Donnie’s Gifts, for example. Donnie never actually got a chance to explain how the gifts work, but we can see protective elements in each of them. Raph: please use your head and don’t just blindly rush in! Mikey: ohmygosh that is so dangerous, please be careful and don’t get hurt! Leo: stop poking the bear, Leo, it only makes him angrier! It makes sense that a 5 who has external fears of the world and has their own protective equipment (the Battle Shells) would extend that to his brothers. And Donnie was able to recognize that even though his brothers got the wrong message, he could move past that and call for a group hug. In the Purple Game he is super anxious to make sure his brothers are okay and not mostly hurt. Insane in the Mama Train also reveals the invention of the Panic Button… and who designed that?

Donnie also seeks a lot of validation. He takes pride in his work, and when his work is appreciated he gives that appreciation back tenfold [such as when he shows off the Turtle Tank to his brothers (Fast and Furriest), or when Splinter says he’s proud of him (Turtle-dega Nights: the Ballad of Rat Man)]. The flip side is that when he’s not getting the validation he needs from others he’ll create it himself, which comes off as arrogant and egocentric. See Smart Lair, when Sheldon 1.0 plays messages of Donnie’s self-worth all night, and is programmed to favor him. Or when he takes full credit for defeating a bad guy: the silverfish in Donnie’s Gifts, and scaring Draxum away with his disco ball in Shadow of Evil. When he gets the recognition for all his hard work from the right people, though, it inspires him to do great things. There is danger in getting validation from the wrong people, however, as we saw in Big Mama’s case in Bug Busters.

Donnie at his Best: Donnie’s at his best (and most relaxed) whenever he’s learning or building something. He gets super excited and happy attending April’s school (The Purple Jacket) or going to the library (The Mystic Library) and wants to attend college someday (The Mutant Menace). The INTJ/5 seeks to absorb information and he’s constantly energized by it.

He’s also energized when he can put that information to use, such as when building something. Did Albearto need a total tear-down in War and Pizza? No. But Donnie had fun making him ‘dazzle!’ How did Donnie cope being in the woods in Todd Scouts? By building an impressive tree fort. Donnie’s projects actually relax him, because he’s exercising his strength and capabilities.

This also works for his method of attacks and plans: Know Thine Enemy. He studies Warren Stone in Newsworthy when they meet him and is the only one who remembers he regenerates by Warren & Hypno Sitting in a Tree. Donnie and Mikey are able to successfully scam Repo Mantis in One Man’s Junk because they know how he thinks. Donnie thwarts everything the Purple Dragons do and can bring Shelldon home because he knows how they operate (The Purple Game, Breaking Purple). He can restore his brothers to their rightful minds in Mind Meld because he knows himself.

Also: music. The fact that one of his Battle Shells has a music mode (Mascot Melee), that he remembers things in song form (The Mystic Library, Donnie vs Witch Town), and that he likes to dance (Stuck on You) is so pure and adorable.

Donnie Relationships:

(while Donnie does see his brothers as dum-dums at times, he admits they’re fun and pretty great to have in Mind Meld)

Raph: We really need a Donnie and Raph episode, but even without one there’s some moments we can look at. I already discussed in Raph’s analysis their general similarities. Donnie doesn’t think Raph always has the brightest ideas, but still has soft moments with him such as giving him $20 at the end of Mind Meld, designing the ‘captain’s chair’ of the Turtle Tank to Raph’s lumbar settings, and appreciating Raph’s pirate accent in Snow Day. They are both protective of their brothers, Raph with his fists and Donnie with his tech. It’s interesting that (I believe) they’re the reverse of each other on the Enneagram: Raph is a 6w5, and Donnie a 5w6. So they both understand the risks involved in what they do (mostly: Donnie still ate poison and Raph still goes on ‘smashcapades’). I really want to see a team-up between them.

Leo: I’m all for the Disaster Twins trope, but to me an episode that epitomizes that isn’t one like Lair Games, where they’re at each other’s throats, but Operation Normal. They’ve apparently done the grandma-getup before. They wind up playing as good cop, bad cop in Fast and Furriest. Sure, one’s high-strung, and one’s laid-back, which can get on each others’ nerves, but there’s also a lot of making up. Brotherly betrayal passes back and forth between them, but never crosses a line. And the numerous times they unconsciously mirror each other can be found with a simple search of the Disaster Twins tag. I’m interested to see more episodes where they work together, even in the background, just because they can get up to wild shenanigans.

Mikey: Mikey’s probably the turtle Donnie most gets along with. They’ve had several episode team-ups: Repo Mantis, One Man’s Junk, Turtle-dega Nights: the Ballad of Rat Man, Breaking Purple, etc. Donnie may be the team academic, but Mikey has strong emotional intelligence. They get along pretty easily, making plans together (One Man’s Junk) and protecting each other (we see Donnie protect Mikey in Repo Mantis and Bug Busters, but we see Mikey protect Donnie by pulling him out of the way in Smart Lair). Donnie helps Mikey focus on the goal at hand, and Mikey helps Donnie communicate better with others. They’re a good team with a pretty solid foundation.

Ultimately, Donnie’s an inventive turtle who wants his brothers to be safe but is still wrestling with a lot of insecurities and unhealthy stress levels. I’m excited to see how he grows into real confidence and utilizes his strengths as an integral member of the team.

For more information on the INTJ and Enneagram 5 personality types, click here:

https://www.16personalities.com/intj-personality

https://www.crystalknows.com/enneagram/type-5-wing-6

https://thoughtcatalog.com/heidi-priebe/2016/01/mbti-and-the-enneagram-2/6/

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #donatello #tmnt donatello #tmnt donnie #tmnt 2k18 #essay #personality #mbti #myers briggs #enneagram #teenage mutant ninja turtles #INTJ #enneagram 5 #5w6 #i spent way too much time on this #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt donnie

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volunaryroom3 · 3 years

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CHAPTER 4

My keys rattled in the door as it locked it behind me. It clicked shut and I rested my head on the door, hair tangling over my ears. Thank fuck that was over. Being a slave to the wage crushes your soul, some more days than others.

Now I was home. My sanctuary. A place where I was safe from the anger of the public, complexity of the world and could batten down the hatches with my favourite human before I had to once more put on my armour and head back into battle.

“What are you doing” said Jamie from the kitchen, who could see me resting my head on the front door, sighing in my zombie like state.

“I don’t know” I muttered into the wood. I straightened my back and walked through the to living room, kicking my shoes off and flinging myself onto a chair.

I took my socks off a wriggled my toes above the carpet. There’s something about bare feet that’s so rebellious. Being completely naked, free from the constraint of polyblend, gives you the pleasure of freedom but is also attractive and conventional. Feet were meant to be covered. They can be ugly, toes utterly offensive and fragile so they must be protected and hidden. For them to be naked feels so audacious, to feel carpet fibres beneath was so unruly and these small rebellions got me through the day.

“Here” said Jamie, entering the room and grabbing my naked big toe as he walked past and placed a mug on the table.

“Is that for me?” I said perking up.

“Well I don’t drink tea” he answered, not looking but gesturing with one hand and scrolling through his phone with the other.

“Okay, what do you want?” I asked, raising one eyebrow and looking at him with a wry smile.

“Just drink it” he said laughing.

We both looked at each other and smiled and I felt my heart skip a beat.

There had been a lot of heartache but then there was Jamie.

In my life there have been many boys, many girls, many people and subsequently much loss and sorrow.

My last boyfriend cheated on me. One minute he was one the phone telling me he loved me and the next he was snapped in an incriminating photo with someone else.

It was early morning when I saw the photograph online. I hadn’t been able to sleep, i was scrolling through my phone under the sheets when I saw his hand on her thigh, my eyes widening in the glow of the screen. A series of incidents flashed in my head; the missed calls, his phone vibrating accompanied by shifty glances, disappearing from the room to take a phone calls, whispering in secrecy, always carefully placing his phone face down on the cabinet, me touching my hand on his and him recoiling, leaving me cold. All these images flickering, falling on top each other like dominos until the last one dropped- he’s cheating on me.

My confrontation was subtle. “It looks like you’re having a good time haha I miss you” I text hoping my agony and urgency would feed through the phone.

No reply. Message read. No reply.

Hours passed as I laid in bed staring at the ceiling until the light of dawn rolled over the walls, White noise humming in my ears.

I went to work that day and I smiled, drank tea and did my job but I wasn’t there. I was on a autopilot. I was trapped in my mind, those images flittering past, unable to escape like a slideshow I could not take my eyes off. The pieces of a puzzle were falling into place, my head putting them together and I was lost in my thoughts, nipping and clawing at me through the day. My stomach tight and head spinning.

That evening I was staring into the TV set, blind to the screen and still arguing with myself. I was paranoid. Yes I was paranoid. This isn’t real. The words all muddling together and stacking on top of each other until it just became noise.

Suddenly a text.

“I’m sorry”

My world crashed around me. I felt my hands tightly grip onto each other and my tears fall in slow motion.

“Why?” I cried softy.

A numbness fell over my entire body and I collapsed onto the sofa, my tears running down the tip of my nose and staining the cushion.

After a while the numbness wore off and was replaced by pain. A sharp slice from neck to stomach not visible to the naked eyes but real to my nervous system. I didn’t eat. I didn’t sleep. I was just an exposed nerve; open with excruciating pain.

Weeks passed and I was still spiralling into oblivion. I was in trouble at work for mistakes and absence. I was worrying my family and friends but even that wasn’t enough to stop me slipping into the black hole. The dark pit of depression is all consuming and once you are stuck in the tar, you sink further down, you gasp for air until there’s no return.

“What a bastard” everyone said

“What a loser. His loss!” They chanted

And they were right of course. However this did not help me. I loved him. Somehow he subconsciously became my whole world and now I was lost. Lost and isolated in my loneliness but I knew I had to stop. This wasn’t healthy behaviour.

Grief has a timescale. Death can be a lifetime but the breakdown of a relationship? You are limited. You have the get on with it. You have to bare your teeth and show the world how strong you are. You have to prove to others that you are leaving it behind and if you aren’t moving on? You are weak and you can’t show weakness. You can’t be the one to lose.

So I moved on. I washed, I put clothes on and pushed myself back into life. I had an amazing few months embarking on journeys and weekends away by reconnecting with my lost friends. I immersed myself in live music, healing my soul with the beauty of beats and sound with pilgrimages to gigs and festivals. Wild, drunk nights in the sun building hundreds of memories to last a lifetime. The evidence consisted of a mosaic of Polaroids pinned around my desk: my favourite a muddy photo of me grinning ear to ear, hands in the air which screamed look at me! I’m living life!

When I talked to people I laughed. When I looked at people I smiled.

But every night I still cried in the shower.

Later I found out the girl that in the photo was his ex. They have a child together now. In the end it was all for the best but that still doesn’t stop that painful twinge whenever it crosses my mind.

Every time you are hurt a part of your heart breaks and creates a gap. Tiny shards splinter off and disintegrate into tears. You heal, you recover and you fight but there’s now a hole there that will never close up.

Once I am hurt, I am hurt forever.

He wasn’t the first but he was the last one who took a sledgehammer to my heart and shattered the remaining pieces. With the fragments I had left I swore I would never do it again, that I wouldn’t open up because I could cope, the pain would kill me. From then on I lived my life as half a person. Content but never allowing myself to fully feel. I was comfortable in my solitude but always empty.

That was until I met Jamie.

After lounging around the living room for a while I heard my stomach rumble.

“I’ll make tea” I said stretching. I got up and padded through to the kitchen.

I laughed as I heard him yelling at the tv. I know the match was on and I loved how passionate he was; the same amount he showed about everything in his life, including me.

I opened the cupboards and reached for the pan on the top shelf. I stood on my tiptoes, unbalanced and stretching, my fingers fumbling on the tip of the handle. Just as I felt my hand grip the handle they all came crashing down. Metal clanged onto the worktop, thundered to the floor and onto my bare feet.

I didn’t even make a noise, I just bit my lip and fell to the floor.

“What’s happening?” Yelled Jamie running into the room, seeing me rolling around on the kitchen floor.

“Ow! Sorry” I laughed but still grimacing in pain.

“You’re an idiot” he laughed

“I know”” I said rubbing my toes and frowning.

“It’s not funny” he snapped, his tone angrier than before. “I keep telling you to be careful. You’re so stupid. We were having such a nice time and now you’ve done this’

For a moment he stood over me, towering and serious with disappointment. I felt so small looking up at him and feeling shame wash over me.

“I’m really sorry, its been a long day”” I replied, looking at my feet in remorse.

He helped me up and marched me back to the living room in silence. I sat down on the sofa, raising my injured foot and resting it on the table. Jamie sat down on the other side, his attention brought back to the match.

I’ve always been clumsy. Bruises, broken bones and bangs peppered my childhood memories followed by reckless behaviour as an adult. He was right I needed to be more careful. He was only stern because he cared.

I turned my head towards him but he was still fixed on the tv, unwavering and stoic. I looked down at my feet and felt tears well up in my eyes.

There hadn’t been any trauma, no life changes and nothing worthy to make me unhappy but recently I’d started to feel a weight press down on me. My head had began to feel heavy as tiny bits of stress had started to drip on me and one by one it was building up. I was starting to feel cold and disconnected. Sometimes I’d suddenly freeze in time, stare at the wall, feeling like I was floating away until a friendly face asked if I was okay and brought me back down to earth. I was finding it hard to fall asleep and sometimes I was waking up with a bolt in the night, sweating after a bad dream and then worrying about insignificant things until my alarm called me to work. The other day it rained and I didn’t feel it. I saw the rain fall and land on my face but I didn’t sense it dripping down and onto my collar. I couldn’t feel anything anymore.

It was just a few bad days and I was being dramatic.

I sucked the tears back into my eyes and reached for the cold cup of tea on the table.

Things will get better soon.

#booklover #bookaddict #bookshelf #bipolar disorder #bipolar #mentalheathawareness #mentally ill #mental health #writer #writerscommunity #writing #writerslife #heartbreak #heartache #living with bpd #bpd problems #borderline personality problems #borderline personality disorder

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teamwynn · 7 years

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The Night Voice Retrospective, Pt. 11

Just put me in my fucking grave, I can’t deal with this.

Thirty Years Under the Mountain (a.k.a., the world’s most elaborate attempt to wound me, personally)

I am without words. I am without them because I have so many that I can’t decide which ones are most fit to express my utter and complete disdain with the conclusion to this book, this series, these characters’ stories that I have loved so dearly for so many years. I am betrayed--in the sense that my expectations as a reader were woefully, almost comically, disappointed; in the sense that I paid money to bear witness to this complete wreckage of all established characterization and every sense of quality storytelling techniques; in a sense that is purely cosmic and beyond the abilities of my feeble mortal brain to translate into linguistic phrases formed of black alphabetical markings.

Thirty Years Under the Mountain, which in retrospect I now regard as the first warning sign of the coming apocalypse that was the year 2016 on our miserable hell planet. It was, if nothing else, thematically appropriate to all the other betrayals and disappointments in the real world that we’ve all been forced to endure this past year.

But let’s get into the problems with this, for as limited as my abilities to speak on it are.

So, the battle is won. The Night Voice is defeated and contained. Il’Sanke, Brot’an, the wraith, the specter, and the necromancer are no more. Leesil planted a tree on top of the Spirit Orb and Ore-Locks shoved all of the other orbs into undisclosed hiding places in the earth where no one else can ever find or reach them. Wynn is blind, Magiere is in a poison-induced coma, and everyone else is more or less fine. After some deliberating of how to heal Magiere (“We should pull the arrow out,” “But what if it doesn’t work?” “Well, it did work, so that argument served no purpose but to waste everyone’s time”), the only question left is what Our Heroes intend to do with their miserable, miserable lives now that the evil has been defeated trapped under a tree.

Well, now that everyone is rejoined, the surviving cast of the book can reform back into Team Magiere and Team Wynn in whatever configurations work best for them. You’d think, given how the Teams has historically shaped the whole saga with Team Magiere leading Series 1, Team Wynn leading Series 2, and them coming into conflict and/or partnership throughout Series 3, the most narratively satisfying conclusion would be to bring at least the core the Teams back together now that the threat has been neutralized. But here’s how the breakdown actually ends up going:

Team Magiere does reform and is resolved to go home. At this point in the book, this is the most expected and satisfying conclusion Magiere, Leesil, and Chap could have gotten, but I will have more to say about this a little later on.

Team Wynn remains dissolved. Wynn--after acknowledging that Chap ruined Shade’s life by dictating “what’s best for her” and exiling her from her family--decides that the best thing to do for Shade is… dictating what’s best for her and exiling her from her family. With Team Wynn now permanently splintered:

Wynn and Chane resolve to live in a fucking hole in the ground guarding the sun crystal staff over completely fabricated concerns that it will go out without Wynn watching over it

Shade goes to live a normal dog life in the forest, despite not wanting to do this

Wayfarer is adopted by Magiere and Leesil. But also intends to keep studying under Vreuvilla. And also Chuillyon?? Wait--

Osha….. is sad??? He decides not to go back to the She’ith so…. what is he doing besides being sad? And why is he sad? Because he almost killed Magiere? Because Wynn never made out with him again (because why would she, you’re the one who stopped talking to her, asshole!)?

Chuillyon is apparently cleaning up everyone’s loose ends for them, by dealing with the aftermath of il’Sanke and Brot’an deaths and the fact that they need to keep the Spirit Orb’s location a secret. Fuck all if we know what he plans on doing with his life beyond that.

The book didn’t even pretend to give a shit about Ore-Locks once those orbs were in the ground. Which, by the way, took away the job he had before this book, so we can’t even assume that he would just go back to work with the Stonewalkers, so his ending is a complete blank slate. Did he devote his life to helping the needy? Did he go to art school? Start a garage band? The book never suggests anything he does do, so those guesses are as good as any, as far as I’m concerned.

Any surviving character who is not physically present in that final scene before the epilogue gets absolutely jack shit in terms of conclusion. Not Most Aged Father, Nein’a, Freth, En’nish, Ounyalam, Aupsha, Nikolas, Hawes, Pawl, Li’kan, the Duchess, any of the sages, any of the Stonewalkers, anyone involved in any of the three active civil wars that are occurring in this world, and not any of the side characters from Miiska--and that last set of characters is another thing I will get to a little later.

So, that’s where we’re at with everyone’s retirement plans. Time to roll into the epilogue, where we get a nice, long reminiscence from Chane about how that all turned out for everyone over the past 30 years.

Well, there’s a few immediate problems that spring out with the narrative he gives us. I’ll try to go about it in chunks so I don’t overwhelm us all. First, he explains how he and Wynn have been living in that creepy cave with the giant dragon skeleton and the bottomless chasm all by themselves for three decades. Wynn and Chane live there for the express purpose of checking on the status of the sun staff crystal to make sure it doesn’t go out, causing the tree to die. Chuillyon and his sage minions teleport in via underground tree from time to time to deliver food and essentials, and Magiere, Leesil, and Chap visit Wynn once a year (except for when they don’t) and they’ve all learned to be civil with Chane (except when they’re not.) Wayfarer, Shade, and on one occasion Shade’s babies visit, too. Ore-Locks built a bridge over the chasm, and that was all that was mentioned of him ever hanging out with Wynn and Chane again. I don’t think it was outright stated but strongly implied that Osha never visited. We learn from Chane that he and Wynn mostly spend their time playing cards, drinking tea, and reading books. Chane feeds automatically off the Spirit Orb. Both Wynn and Chane are apparently relieved to be living in isolation so they don’t have to worry about anyone judging them for their gross relationship. Wynn sometimes still plays with her mantic sight and sometimes uses it as a loophole around her blindness to see Chane. We also learn from Chane that Osha and Wayfarer have returned to the Elven Territories in the Farlands.

Problems:

Why do they have to live under the mountain to check on the sun staff? They don’t even check every day. Chuillyon could teleport Wynn there from Calm Seatt like, once a week.

Wynn and Chane are the least equipped to be responsible for this task. Wynn is blind and wouldn’t be able to see if the light went out. Chane will die if he’s exposed directly to the light. This was a poor tactical choice.

Why is Wynn supposedly the only one who can relight the staff if it goes out? Il’Sanke taught her how to do that, and he had other non-sorcerer pupils who probably knew how to do that, could figure it out, or could be taught by Wynn. For example, Mujahid, who was last seen at the Elven Sage’s Guild, which is where Chuillyon lived, making it a very simple matter to teleport Mujahid periodically to the cave to check on the staff. Like… there literally is already an established character in the book who is set up perfectly to handle this task.

No one ever had a legitimate reason to expect the staff to go out, anyway.

And even if it did, what does it matter? The Night Voice could only be destroyed with all five orbs, and Ore-Locks shoved the other four into the crust of the earth. Even if The Night Voice’s minions could find the other orbs, they would never be able to reach them. And trapping the Night Voice didn’t destroy its minions, ‘cause Chane is still there, so all this entire ordeal with the tree and the staff is even accomplishing to begin with is getting the Night Voice to shut up.

Did Chuillyon get his job back? Obviously he’s working with the Sages Guild (but is helping Wynn without their knowledge, apparently?) but when and how did he get his job back? Does the Sages Guild not care that he keeps walking off with resources and delivering them to an unknown location? I feel like if the Guild higher-ups knew about Wynn still being alive, they would give several unhappy shits about it.

Team Magiere has access to teleportation trees and they only visit Wynn once a year? Those guys are shit friends.

Ore-Locks isn’t mentioned visiting at all once the bridge is built. Am I??? honestly supposed to believe that he and Chane just stopped hanging out? Again, he no longer has a job, essentially, and he has historically jumped on the slightest of excuses to run off and hang out with Chane even when he did have a job. And if anything happened to the tree, wouldn’t they want him there to re-hide the Spirit Orb?

While I deeply and sincerely appreciate that nothing was ever said in regard to vampire sex, up to the point of outright insinuating that Wynn and Chane actually had a chaste relationship, what the fuck were they doing for 30 fucking years? Drinking tea does not count as an activity, and reading and playing card games would get boring pretty fucking fast. Not only that, BUT WYNN IS BLIND! Even if Chane read everything to Wynn, how the fuck did just the two of them play cards if Wynn is blind!?!?!?!? And it’s not like living in a cave gives either of them hot new dinner conversation topics. That would be an unsurvivable level of boredom.

Who the fuck was judging Wynn and Chane for their relationship aside from the few people who still visited them under the mountain? We know from way back in Series 1 that Welstiel assumed they were dating, we know the dwarves in Through Stone and Sea all assumed they were dating, the sages mostly seemed to make the same assumption. Most people don’t even know that Chane’s a vampire, and those that do don’t really seem to have any issues with vampire-human relationships. And this concern has never been raised before now, so?? Why is it A Thing now?

With regards to the mantic sight, please read this post. I know I’m trying to distance my main blog from this one, but I think it would literally kill me to type that out again.

How does Chane know about Wayfarer and Osha’s living situation, why does he care, and why does he point out in the narration itself that it doesn’t make sense that they went back there given that they were both exiled? Since the elven rebellion arc was never finished, we have no reason to believe it would ever be safe for either of them to move back there. Not only that, neither of them had anything left in the Elven Territories to motivate them to go back. And Wayfarer was also living with Team Magiere, studying under Vreuvilla, and starting up her own sage’s order. That puts her living in literally four different locations. What the fuck?

Wow, that’s a lot of problems! Let’s continue with the events of the epilogue and see what else we can find.

Except, whoops, this post is already too long! Tune in next time for Part 11.5, where I will continue screaming about Wynn and Chane’s ending, because there is still so much ground to cover on that topic alone.

#The Night Voice spoilers #TNV Retrospective

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