#but say no fruit juice ever. and that's insane.

[basshole-astard]

PSA: i keep seeing posts about staying cool in extreme heat that include advice like "gatorade is bad actually!" and "don't drink fruit juice it'll just dehydrate you!" and neither of these are true!

regarding fruit juice: there's apparently a misconception that Any Sugar At All will dehydrate you, and that's simply not true. yes, sugar will make you pee more when consumed in large amounts, but 1) the natural sugar in fruits won't do this to you 2) great news! a lot of fruit juices exist without any added sugar in them! 3) honestly even having a glass of the fruit juice with added sugar won't completely dehydrate you as long as you're also drinking water throughout the day. if its hot you deserve a cold treat of a drink!!! can't go wrong with fruit juice!!!

regarding gatorade: maybe this isn't an every day drink, but guess what: if it's 110F/40C or hotter outside, and you don't have AC, or you're moving around a lot outside of the AC, and you're sweating buckets: that's when you drink a gatorade.

gatorade exists to replenish all the electrolytes (salt) and glucose (sugar) that you sweat out. YES it is meant for athletes to drink during intensive work outs and not necessarily for people who aren't doing that kind of exercise. BUT GUESS WHAT! when you're sweating buckets because you had to walk to the bus in extreme heat, that's intensive exercise. please feel free to drink a gatorade after that! that's its intended use case!!!!

no: neither of these drinks should be a total replacement for water. but drinking a lot of water and then treating yourself to a fruit juice with lunch is a good idea!!! drinking a gatorade becuase you just had to walk for 20 minutes in the heat is a good idea!!!

Please Stop Spreading Misinformation About Drinks!!! It's fine if you drink things that aren't water!!!! Yes you should probably always be drinking water but drinking something else As Well isn't going to hurt you!!!! okay!!!! its fine!!!!!!

honestly so long as you are consistently getting Any (non-alcoholic) fluids in you, you're doing great!!!!!! okay!!!! i love you stay safe <3

#also: drinking A Soda or A Coffee isn't going to completely dehydrate you if you're drinking other fluids tbqh!!! #its fine!!!!! its fine!!!!! #drinks #heat #dehydration #this post exists because i'm mad at misinfo but also #this is for my homies who hate the taste of water and struggle to stay hydrated #because people have told them over and over again You Must Absolute Drink Water And Nothing Else and so they just don't drink anything #listen!! hey!!! whoever told you that was lying!!!! #drinking Any Fluids At All (yes even with caffeine!!) is better than Not Drinking Anything #please hydrate!!!! it's okay if that hydration isn't water!!!! #honestly i tried to be extremely non confrontational in this post but im pretty sure i've seen people suggest flavored water packets #but say no fruit juice ever. and that's insane. #it's all fluids baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #so long as you are drinking fluids you are combatting dehydration #YES water is the best option HOWEVER. if you drink things that aren't water that's also okay! i promise!!!!!!!!

[sguidwards-bestfriend]

Dp x dc thoughts and stuff

New Dimension, Who's This?

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

Okay okay wait what if ghosts sort of feed off their own energy supply or like humans make our own blood they make their own ecto.

But Danny is a halfa.

Maybe he doesn't make any or just not in his human form. So when his powers use it up he has to find a way to get more.

In Amity that isn't really a problem, but if he's not in Amity? If he's not even in his dimension?

...

Danny is king, he has been for a few years now. Lets say he's 20 something and he's still learning his og powers as well as his new kingly eldritch ones.

He makes a portal, goes in to check it out, and gets stuck when he doesn't have enough juice to make another one to go back.

Portals aren't simple, even a portal for something human at a lower power level needs a lot to make a portal in their own dimension.

Creating one for an eldritch being, the king of the infinite realms, to another dimension requires an insane amount of energy. so he's stuck... somewhere, with no energy source. Transforming back into something vaguely human looking is taxing so he sits on the ground to take stock. The extra arms, paper white skin and hair, and the many ever shifting eyes are gone, but he can still feel the fangs and pointy ears, his crown shrunk down to a broach keeping a cape in place, it's covered in a frost so cold the fabric around it crystalizes, and his clothing is an odd mix of ghostly regalia and a black hoodie. It doesn't look bad, but he doesn't know how this dimension works just yet and he doubts this will help him "fit in".

Thankfully invisibility and intangibility come so naturally to him it's just the switch that requires ecto, similar to transforming, once he's there that's where he'll stay.

He needs to find a power source, wherever it is he's ended up, so he goes looking. He finds Lazarus pits but they aren't bottomless like the lakes in the zone. Some are like a dripping faucet, sure it'll fill back up at some point but who knows how long that'll take. Others were artificial, someone ripped a hole between realities, probably a small one since the leftover feeling of a portal wasn't there.

Danny stays invisible for nearly 2 months as he searches for a way home, time can act differently between dimensions, in Amity he might be gone an hour or a decade. The best thing to do for now is to get in contact with Clocky and hope they can figure it out together.

While emptying another pit he hears an angry man yell "You said this one wasn't empty."

An obviously nervous voice answers, "It was full this morning, Sir."

"This is the last one we have any record of!" there's a crash that intrigues Danny so he pops above the surface to catch a glimpse.

His stomach falls when he sees a Vlad looking fruit loop tearing apart a makeshift lab in a cave. Equipped with the same ridicules cape and beard.

There is a woman sitting on a folding chair, her legs are crossed and she very obviously is done with whatever fruit loop 2.0 is doing.

He was expecting to find more than 4! If that's the last of the leaks he needs to find another source asap.

"We can head to Gotham." the woman says, still uninterested as she pulls at a thread on her sleeve. "That place has always been a cesspool for everything weird."

"Nyssa." the man takes a breath, no longer yelling he continues, "We've tried that."

The woman stands, she looks scarier calm than the fruitloop does angry. "No, we tried to find one. We couldn't search there cuz of the bats, but if there are a few diversions we could get enough equipment into the sewers and we'd continue our search unnoticed."

Danny doesn't care much about the rest, he needs to get to Gotham before they do. He just needs to find where that is.

...

Jason Todd came back from the dead a few years ago. [We can leave him at around 23, idk what age he was when Talia plopped him into the pits.]

He's angry ALL the time, it fogs his mind so much it feels like he's no longer in control of his body. He knows he nearly killed one of his brothers, possibly two, but they ignore it so he does too.

He hasn't seen his family much since he was... brought back. As always, something pushes him to take action when he would rather not.

This time it's a rumor amongst his lackeys about someone planning on killing Redhood. They don't know he and Red are the same person, so he was planning on leaving the helmet at a safe house and sticking around to give orders and keep an eye on things.

That plan falls through when a group of three come up to him, they think he spends the most amount of time with the boss and want to keep their leader safe, but don't feel they have that kind of relationship with him to show how worried they are. They push Jason to take Redhood and hide.

His way of doing things creates a pretty even playing field amongst the lackeys, other than Redhood himself. If he refuses he's not a team player, if he tries to advise against it they'll think he's the one trying to kill his own alter ego.

He has to go somewhere none of his enemies know of, but also where none of his allies know.

That's how he's ended up being shuffled into the manor by Alfred, duffle bag in his arm and a headache so horrendous it's hard to understand what Alfred is saying.

~

Jason had been at the manor for two weeks, in that time he'd heard of two territory fights by crime alley, someone emptying the Lazarus pits around the world, and the assassination attempt on him hasn't played out yet.

He was going insane with his family on him at all times. No matter what he did someone was with him.

He knew telling them he felt ill and didn't want to hurt an innocent if the rage took over wasn't the best idea, but he couldn't think of one that would work as well to get them on his side.

That meant, however, that he wouldn't be able to go out on patrol at all nor leave the manor alone.

Damian, of all of them, was the one that helped him. He still acted like the spoiled brat he always was, but he'd grown. He was calmer, not by much, but it took him longer to be set off than he used to.

It wasn't hard to convince him not to say anything, he still knew his brother after all he came prepared. An intricate knife from 15th century china he nabbed off a man with a sword collection that could rival Damians and a story of wanting to get back his cat that he had to leave at his main safe house was all it took to get Damian to agree.

With his needed entertainment (books and videogames), his cat stuffed inside his jacket (which yes, Emma did exist), and ice cream; they were making their way back to the manor at dusk. Jason froze, someone something was following them.

"Dami, do you have your sensor turned on."

"Of course I do." he puffed out his chest and stopped to push back his sleeve.

"Don't stop walking, check what's to my left." the building was boarded up. It hadn't been like that last time he was here.

"Don't tell me what to do." Damian caught up with him before adding, "The building has no electricity or anything in it, but it's weirdly cold."

Just as they both look over to the building something phases through the boarded up window. "Run, now!"

As they take off towards the manor the creature follows them. He can't hear it, no footsteps, no heartbeat, no breathing, but he can feel it. And he wants to fight it.

"It's still following us." Damian whisper yelled. then Damian answered a question he didn't ask. "We're half a mile from the manor, on the road with the ice-cream shop."

"You have your com on?" His need to fight this thing only grew.

"Just with Tim. We should never have them fully off, something could happen."

Of course, he knew that, he suffered those consequences. He was probably the reason it was so enforced... and why it was followed.

Suddenly the roaring of an engine and a black car with all it's doors open comes racing down the road. Damian jumps in first, with Emma stuffed in his jacket he can't just throw himself in so he chucks his games and slides in feet first, hugging his chest to keep her safe.

The doors shut and the car speeds off past the entrance to the manor.

The winding roads should have shook the creature off their trail. It's not long before the car takes them down a secret entrance to the bat cave.

There's yelling before he's even out of the car.

"You could have got hurt!" Tim is yelling at him, "I don't care who you think you are, you put our brother in danger!" The rage starts back up, he was here first, he was the one who could protect Dami not him.

"Timmothy I fight crime."

Tim swivels on his heels, "That thing wasn't human. How would you have fought it exactly?"

Jason can feel himself being engulfed in it again, he's vision going green and his whole body tensing. "Listen here replacement."

"I am not!" Tim turns back around, the steam in him vanishes when he looks at Jason's face.

"Boys," a calm voice echoes through the cave. "No fighting in the cave. Go up stairs to breath or finish outside."

Jason ignores Tim and Dami as he walks to the elevator. He can't look at Alfred, can't let him see him like this.

Once out from behind the bookcase he lets Emma down gently, then flops onto the couch. If they know what's good for them they'll find another way up.

They don't apparently and all three walk out the same exit, bickering.

The noise erases the effort he'd made to quite the pits, as he stands to shut them up the creature floats up through the table.

A terrifying creature with long teeth, pointy ears, long curved nails and a cap hiding a thin hunched figure leans towards him. As he jumps away the thing grabs him and latches on.

Jason tries to shake it off, but it's almost like it's stuck to him. Not physically, but there is something holding them together and it's not the creature.

Suddenly a bright light flashes and the creature turns onto a young man.

"Why's the ecto in this dimension so shit." It... he looks tired, there are bags under his eyes and his skin looks sickly. He's draped over Jason, at first he thought the man was holding Jason in place, but it seemed more like he was holding himself up.

Tim stopped in his tracks. "What the fuck?"

"Language."

"Sorry Alf, but uh... What's happening?"

The man mumbled something, he rested his head on Jason's shoulder, he could see the effort it took to speak louder. "I'm so hungry dude. Why are you the only liminal person I've come across? It makes no sense."

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

#eldritch danny #Dp x dc thoughts and stuff #dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc au #danny phantom #jason todd

[mouschiwrites]

hi hi! can I request some headcanons about the ninja (+pixal, if you're up for it) having an artist s/o? okay thank you, also I love your writing!

Oooh yess!! Where my artist ninjago enjoyers at⁉️ I’ve come to nourish you <3

Ninjago - Ninjas (+ Pixal) with an Artist s/o

Jay

Immediately asks if you can draw/paint/etc him

If you agree, he will ask again in the future

….honestly he’ll probably keep asking even if you say no

What can he say? He wants to inspire you ;)

If you have art block, he immediately jumps to pose dramatically or arrange a bowl of fruit or something

He’s equally enamored with the quality of your work and the fact that it came from your hands

He loves all your work, even the pieces you decide to scrap/re-do

“What are you doing?? That was perfect!”

“Jay? How long have you been standing there-”

On that note, he loves to watch you work

Even when you don’t know he’s watching… (he’s a little obsessed)

But the plus side of this is that he knows the exact products you use, and he can see when you’re running low

He makes sure to replenish your stocks for you :) so you won’t ever have to worry about running out mid-project

He also makes sure to flaunt your work as much as possible, especially the pieces he “inspired”

He truly thinks you’re the best artist in the world, and he WILL fight someone over it

Cole

I see Cole as a pretty artsy guy himself, so he’d be thrilled to have an artsy s/o

You might not expect it, but he’s really in tune with his feelings, so to me it makes sense

He’s not quite as artsy as you, but he knows how to appreciate it

He’s more into the performing arts himself, but he has no less respect for other types of art

He’ll totally arrange work sessions for you both, which vary depending on the vibe you’re working with

Feeling like doing something a little dark or moody? Dramatic piano. Candles. Wine/grape juice in wine glasses.

Feeling colorful? Open windows. Flowers in vases. Candy and fruit. Maybe some cartoons playing in the background.

Point being: he knows how to get a vibe going

He really loves to work alongside you, even if you’re not doing the same thing

Sometimes he tries to sketch or paint, but more often he’s just watching you work or practicing moves

(You guys totally have a shared studio btw; wood floors and barre for him, easel/supply cabinet/whatever you need for you)

You guys definitely help each other out too

He’ll teach you a few moves so you can be his dance partner every now and again, and he’s more than happy to be your muse in return

He doesn’t really do performances or anything (dance is just a side hobby), so he has all the more respect for you if you publicize your work

He loves all your work, but he’s also a great source of constructive criticism

“I like this one. It’s darker than your other pieces, though, isn’t it? More drab.”

“Yeah, that’s kinda what I was thinking. I think I was just in a mood when I made it.”

Kai

He’ll make requests, but mostly for things he thinks would be cool

“What if you did one with, like, a car shooting flames from its exhaust pipes? Oh! And the driver is super handsome with a flaming cape and swords and sunglasses that are made of pieces of the sun!”

“That is insane. …I’m starting right now.”

He really admires your art, and he’s honestly a bit jealous of your skill

He actually has a pretty creative mind, just not the means to express it

So he’ll be shy about it, but eventually he asks if you can give him some pointers

He doesn’t want to keep asking you to bring his sharks flying in jets over volcanoes to life forever, after all

He’s gotta learn to be independent!

So he’ll quietly join you while you work, watching you closely and trying to follow along

He gets frustrated when he isn’t instantly as talented as you, and you have to laughingly assure him that skill takes time

He only gains more respect for you as he tries to stay calm

He learns to truly admire your work this way

And with his admiration came a tenfold increase in support

However you share your art, he’s the #1 supporter

Posting online? He’s already liked, commented, and shared on 7 different platforms. At a showcase? He’s dressed sharply, stationed not-so-inconspicuously in front of your piece(s) and getting others to talk about them

Zane

He also has a deep appreciation for art

He doesn’t always understand non-logical things, but art has a way of resonating with him

So to have a partner who makes art…

It adds a whole new level of emotional depth to your relationship

You already make him feel complex things, so seeing art that’s from you is truly an experience

The wistfulness he gets when looking at normal art is only amplified when he remembers that your hands produced it

He likes to be with you when he admires it, squeezing your hand while he takes in the little details

He’s a quiet admirer, but he’ll absolutely attend any events you’re featured in/support any online presence you have

He never gets tired of looking at your work; or looking at you work, for that matter

If you let him, he’ll watch you work

He’s dead silent, which is either a blessing or a curse depending on how easily you get creeped out

Eventually, when you finish, he’ll stand up and join you at your side, admiring the final product

You know he likes it when he reaches for your hand with a smile, letting you rest your head against him

The most you’ll get verbally is “it’s beautiful,” but trust me, he feels so much more deeply about the piece (and you <3)

Lloyd

Lloyd is more curious than anything when he finds out you’re an artist

What kinds of art do you do? Can he see your work? Have you always liked art?

He’s eager to see your work, but he’s not sure he can “appreciate” it properly

You have to reassure him that there’s no one way to “appreciate” art, and however he feels about it, that’s just how he feels

Your response only increases his interest

He ends up getting more into art because of you

The art of appreciation, if you will

He wants to be able to understand your work more so that he knows how to support you

He mostly spends hours just staring at your work, trying to notice the little details

He’d love to watch you at work, too, if you’ll let him

He asks questions all the time, but still tries not to annoy you

He’s actually already a natural at “appreciating” art, but the fact that he’s always trying to learn only makes him better at it

So you can do nothing but smile while he tilts his head, carefully formulating his next question

They’re surprisingly deep at times:

“Do you think this piece uses smoother shapes because you were feeling relaxed, so you moved more slowly? Or perhaps you were just emulating your calmness subconsciously..?”

“That could be it. I hadn’t thought of it like that.”

“Oh, sorry, am I overanalyzing? Sorry-”

“No, no, you’re totally right.”

You’ll ruffle his hair affectionately, and he’ll wrap an arm around your shoulder while he continues to examine your piece :]

Nya

I’m gonna be honest, I don’t see Nya as the type to get all deep over the meaning of art

Like, if it’s pleasing to the eye she’ll appreciate it, but she doesn’t think about it too much

It’s just too abstract for her tastes; the pseudo-reasoning of art critics gets on her nerves

But for your work she makes an exception

Well, not really an exception—she doesn’t take to pseudo-reasoning

She knows you, she knows your feelings, so when she sees your work, she sees a piece of you in it

It’s something she doesn’t see in other art pieces; she doesn’t know the artist, so it’s nothing more than a visual piece for her

But with your pieces, she can dig deeper because she knows deeper information

That’s why she loves your work, and why she loves watching you work

You’re the only artist that makes her feel like she really understands art, and for that she appreciates you

(She still thinks that most critics talk out of their asses though)

On that note, she will fight your critics. She will hunt them down and make them regret ever trying to “understand” your work

“Tch, look at this idiot. He doesn’t even know what he’s talking about! He doesn’t know you!”

“Nya, he’s complimenting my work-”

“But he doesn’t understand it!”

Honestly you think it’s a little funny how she’s unintentionally become one of those critics who argue about a piece’s meaning

Only for you though ;)

Pixal

She has a vast trove of knowledge, but feeling is something she often struggles with

There are few things that actually give her profound emotions

Your art is one of those things

The fact that it came from you, that your hands crafted it…

It stirs something in her, and suddenly the shapes and colors come to life

She asks you about it often, trying to understand

“Why is it… calming?”

“Well, I suppose I used some pretty muted colors, and the imagery is kinda peaceful… I dunno, does it calm you?”

“Yes. It makes me feel calm.”

Obviously you’re proud of her for better recognizing her emotions

And she’s proud of herself!!

Your art helps her understand a part of her that she’s only beginning to explore

And, since it comes directly from you, she credits you with the help :)

She loves to see your finished work, but she also finds herself mesmerized by your creative process

Watching the piece come together, each motion bringing it closer to completion, helps her understand the art itself

She tells herself that it helps her understand her feelings, too

Even though she knows that not every piece is dedicated to her, she always thanks you for showing her your work <3

Thanks for this request!! And thank you for reading, take care you little rockstars <33

(divider by saradika)

#ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago headcanons #ninjago x reader #kai smith #kai smith x reader #kai x reader #cole brookstone #cole brookstone x reader #cole x reader #jay walker #jay walker x reader #jay x reader #lloyd garmadon #lloyd garmadon x reader #lloyd x reader #zane julien #zane julien x reader #zane x reader #nya smith #nya smith x reader #nya x reader #pixal x reader #pixal borg #pixal borg x reader

[sequinsmile-x]

Leap of Faith

It's a leap year, so Emily decides to propose.

But it's Emily and Aaron, so it's never quite that simple.

-x-

Hi besties,

it's a leap year - which means you get a whole extra day of me being insane about these two.

I had a lot of fun writing this one, so I hope you enjoy reading it. It got really soft because of how much these idiots love each other.

Please let me know what you think <3

-x-

Words: 3.5k

Warnings: Pregnancy, so fluffy in parts you will need to floss after

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

It’s Penelope who gives her the idea. Yet another girl's night that descends into her drunkenly asking Emily when she’s finally going to marry Aaron, a question that had lingered in her mind longer than it usually would. Her inability to drink along with her friends, due to the baby girl kicking along almost on beat with the music in the bar Penelope had dragged them to, means Emily can’t stop thinking about it, unable to shake it off as she’s passed a shot of tequila like she usually would. 

“When are you and Hotch getting hitched? It’s been too long since we had a BAU wedding,” Penelope asks, almost spilling a cocktail all over herself as the glass just about makes it back onto the table when she puts it down, “I never thought I’d say this but stop making babies and just get married.” 

Emily chuckles and shakes her head, sipping her alcohol-free cocktail and wincing at the overly sweet taste, “We’re happy as we are, Pen.” 

It wasn’t that she didn’t want to marry Aaron, it just hadn’t ever really had the chance to come up. Their relationship had moved quickly from the start, both of them well aware they were it for each other from their first kiss. Things had only accelerated when they found out she was pregnant just over a year after her return from Paris. She’d found out just before JJ and Will’s wedding, the check-up that Aaron had forced her into after the bank changing their lives more than either of them could have anticipated. 

They’d got lost in finding a home after that, the arrival of their son, Elliot, only happening just weeks after they moved into their house. Life had, as it always does, just carried on. Days turned into weeks, into months and then years as they raised their sons and loved each other. Before she knew it, it was almost four years later and she was pregnant again, something that she had planned this time, both she and Aaron aware they wanted one more baby, and the only people who ever brought up marriage were her mother and Penelope. 

She’d always dismissed their comments, saying that she didn’t need a piece of paper to show her love for Aaron, to prove that they were a family. She’d thought when she was growing up that she’d end up married to someone that she didn’t truly love, doomed to repeat the cycle she’d been born into, and when that hadn’t happened she’d been relieved. It was relief that turned into defiance, making her sure for years that she’d never marry anyone. But it would be a lie to say she didn’t want to call Aaron her husband, that she didn’t want to share the name both he and their children had, and all of a sudden it’s all she can think about. 

Penelope rolls her eyes, “I know, I know. You always say that,” she says, pushing another shot towards JJ who looks at Emily for help, but doesn’t find it, narrowing her eyes at Emily as she drinks her glorified fruit juice, “All I’m saying is that it’s a leap year, and tradition says that means you can propose to him if you want to on leap day,” she says, waggling her eyebrows playfully, “Speed things along if bossman is dragging his feet.” 

Emily’s back immediately straightens as she furrows her brows, her hormones going into overdrive as she feels defensive of the man she loves, of their relationship, even though she logically knows her friend means no harm.

“He isn’t dragging his feet,” she says, crossing her arms so they settle on top of her bump, “He’s been married before and it didn’t work,” her hand drops to where she can feel her daughter shifting under her skin, a feeling that was no less amazing than it had been when she was pregnant with Elliot, “Thats a big thing to get past.” 

“Em,” JJ says, cutting in before Penelope can make it any worse, a warning look thrown at their enthusiastic friend as she places her hand on Emily’s arm, “We know that. And we all know what it took for me to even consider marrying Will,” she says, smiling kindly as she squeezes Emily’s arm, a flash of something in JJ’s eyes that disappears as quickly as Emily sees it, “And whether you’re married or not, everyone can see how much you and Hotch love each other and the kids.” 

She smiles and nods, placing her hand over her friends and squeezing briefly before she looks over at Penelope, “I’m happy the way things are.” 

The conversation moves on, largely due to JJ forcing it onto something else, but Emily can’t stop thinking about it. When she finally excuses herself to leave and gets into her car she texts Aaron to let him know she’s on her way home and her eyes linger on the date on the screen.

February 8th. 

She smiles as she sees Aaron’s response come through, a picture of him and the boys snuggled on the couch, Elliot fast asleep against him and Jack halfway there, and for a reason she can’t explain thats what makes her decision for her. The image of her Hotchner boys all waiting for her, the roll of her baby girl in her belly, and Penelope’s words rolling around her head. 

She was going to propose to Aaron, and she had 3 weeks to plan it.

___

It’s Dave who makes it all come crumbling down. 

It’s two weeks later, vague plans running around her head about everything she wants to do that distract her from work. It means she’s behind on her paperwork, so she used that as an excuse to stay behind after Aaron left, leaving exactly the second work ended for once. He didn’t even try to argue with her, didn’t try to make her leave with him like he usually would, but she barely pays any attention to it her focus on her computer as she tries to finalise her choice of restaurant to take him to. 

She hears footsteps behind her and she knows it's Dave, and she sighs, raising her eyebrow without turning to look at him, “You can’t sneak up on me,” she says as he sits on her desk, “Even when I am 6 months pregnant.” 

He chuckles and sits and looks at her computer screen, “I thought you were meant to be working, not looking at DC’s finest restaurants.” 

She rolls her eyes and then looks back and forth between him and the computer, looking at him curiously before she speaks, desperately trying to sound casual, “You’ve proposed four times-”

“Three times-”

“How did you do it?” She carries on, acting as if he hasn’t spoken. She watches as the realisation dawns on him and he leans back slightly. 

“Who are you planning on proposing to, Bella?” He asks, his eyebrow raised as she rolls her eyes. 

“Well, you but you’ve just ruined the surprise,” she deadpans, “Obviously it’s Aaron.” 

He smiles at her, a look in his eyes that she can’t entirely place and he crosses his arms over his chest, “Why are you doing that?” 

She huffs out a breath, a hint of nervousness planting in her chest. She places her hand on her belly, the movement of her daughter calming her slightly just like it had when she was pregnant with Elliot. 

“Well, it was Pen’s idea initially,” she says, clearing her throat, unsure why she feels embarrassed, “But it’s a leap year and there’s a tradition where women propose on the 29th,” she says, smiling at him, “So I thought I would,” She says. Dave’s expression is unreadable, something she hates, and she starts to worry, her eyebrows furrowing as he tries to figure out what to say, “What?” 

He hesitates for a moment before he smiles sadly at her, “Are you sure Aaron wants to get married?” 

The question throws her, stunning her into uncharacteristic silence for a moment as she stares at her friend. The nerves that had planted in her chest start to bloom, the flowers of it taking up space in her chest until she feels like she can’t breathe. 

“Yes…” she says, clearing her throat, “Why? Has he said something to you?” 

He stares at her again for a moment and she wants to scream, but he sighs, “Don’t you think if he wanted to, he would have proposed to you already?” 

She laughs humourlessly, all the excited hope she’d felt for the last couple of weeks disappearing with one question, replaced with doubt she wasn’t used to and an ache she hadn’t expected. 

“You know what,” she says, avoiding his gaze as she abruptly stands up, shoving her things into her purse, “I promised the boys I’d be home earlier today so I should go,” she puts her back over her shoulder and walks away, knowing if she so much as looks at Dave she’ll cry, and she’s determined not to until she gets to her car, “See you tomorrow Dave.” 

She leaves so quickly she doesn’t see him shake his head at himself or pull out his phone, already sending Aaron won’t see until tomorrow morning. 

You’d better follow through with your plan. I think I might have just made things difficult. 

___

She cries all the way home.

Her hands tight on the steering wheel as she tries to steady her breathing, well aware that she has to pull herself together by the time she gets home. 

She could accept it if Aaron never wanted to get married, no matter how much she might want it now she’s thought about it. More than anything, she wanted him to be happy. And if that meant never being his wife, if it meant that they never took that step, she could live with it. Even if it hurt for a little while. She curses Penelope internally, furious at her for putting this idea in her head in the first place. She was fine before, she was happy. And she knew she would be again. 

She sits in her car in the driveway for a couple of minutes after she arrives to gather herself, wiping away the tears that had escaped from her cheeks. She blows out a steady breath and shakes her head before taking a moment to check her make-up in the rearview mirror. Once she’s satisfied it’s okay she she places her hand on her stomach and looks down, smiling sadly when she feels the baby kick.

“Come on, sweet girl, let's go see Daddy and your brothers.” 

She pauses again for a moment when she makes it to the front door, putting up the defences she usually didn’t need here, forcing a smile onto her face she hopes Aaron doesn’t see through, so she can fake being okay until she actually feels okay again. She pushes the door open and her smile becomes real the moment Elliot runs towards her, his excitement palpable as he throws himself at her. 

She bends down and picks him up, hauling him into her embrace and settling him on her hip. She kisses the side of his head, breathing in the scent of his shampoo, “Hi, sweet boy. Mommy missed you.” 

“I missed Mama,” Elliot says, pressing his face into her neck. 

She hums contently as she kisses the top of his head again. It’s only then that she realises she can smell dinner, the scent of her favourite meal on the air, and she sighs, love for her boyfriend overriding anything she’d felt on the drive home.

“Where are Jack-Jack and Daddy?” She asks, tilting her head to look at her little boy and he smiles, an almost coy edge to it she’d never seen before. She narrows her eyes at him and tickles his belly, laughing along when he starts to giggle, a quieter, high-pitched version of Aaron’s laugh. “What are you up to, huh?” 

“Dinner is ready,” he says, tilting his head in the direction of the dining room, “I helped.” 

She smiles and starts to walk towards the dining room, adjusting her hold on her 3-year-old so she doesn’t waddle quite so much between the weight of him and her bump, “I’m sure it’s delicious. It smells so…”

She drifts off as she steps into the dining room. The table is set for the four of them, but there are artificial candles on every surface, a choice she would later realise when she thought back on it that Aaron had made so the boys didn’t hurt themselves. There are a bunch of wildflowers set in front of the seat where she usually sits when they eat, and a bottle of sparkling cider next to two champagne flutes and two plastic cups, the faces of the boy's favourite superheroes staring up at her. She looks at Aaron and Jack, both of them standing proudly in front of her, smiles matching the one Elliot had given her moments ago spread across their faces. 

“What’s all this?” She chokes out, her voice shaking slightly, forcing her to clear it in an attempt to even it out. 

Aaron smiles and steps forward, taking Elliot from her and kissing his forehead before he settles him down on the floor. The little boy immediately walks over and stands next to Jack, linking his hand through his big brothers. Aaron turns back to her and reaches for Emily’s hand, squeezing it softly before he blows out a breath. 

“Emily, sweetheart,” he says, pressing his lips together in a clear attempt to stop himself from getting emotional, “You are the best thing that has happened to me in years. Before you I never thought I’d be happy again, but we’re standing here in our home, with our boys,” he says, looking over his shoulder at Jack and Elliot who are smiling widely, he turns back to Emily and reaches out to press his hand on her belly, “Our little girl, and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been, There’s only one thing that will make me happier,” his smile shakes slightly and her breath catches in her chest, her brain finally catching up with what’s happening as he reaches into his pocket. She places her hand over her mouth to capture a gasp as Aaron carries on, “So the boys have a question for you.” 

He turns and looks at the boys, smiling encouragingly, and they nod, speaking almost in unison, Elliot’s clearly rehearsed words coming just a second after Jack’s, an echo that reverberates around the otherwise quiet room. 

“Mom, will you marry Dad?”

“Mama, will you marry Daddy?” 

They fall into silence and she tries to suck in a breath but it shudders through her chest, catching on every rib. Her eyes meet Aaron’s and she can see the nervousness painted across his face, the treacherous hope shining in his eyes. 

Everything catches up with her. The excitement she’d felt in trying to plan to propose to him, the way it had turned bitter during her conversation with Dave, the joy that was threatening to break free from her chest, all mixed together with the pregnancy hormones that somehow felt worse this time around. And she promptly bursts into tears. 

“Sweetheart-” Aaron says as his eyes go wide and he steps towards her, his hand on her shoulder. A sob escapes her, painful and rough as it forces its way out and she all but collapses against him, her arms tight around his back as she sinks into him as closely as she can with her bump in between them, “I’ve got you.” He turns and looks at the boys, both of whom have matching shocked expressions on their faces. 

“Is Mama sad?” Elliot asks, his eyebrows furrowed, his little dark eyes shining with tears and Aaron knows he’s got to do something before everyone is crying. 

“Jack,” he says, looking at his eldest, “Why don’t you go take your brother to play that game he likes? I’ll come find you when it’s time to eat.” 

Jack frowns, his eyes fixed on a still crying Emily, “But Dad-”

“Now, Jack. Please,” Aaron says, rubbing a circle on Emily’s back, “We just need a few minutes.” 

Jack eventually relents, nodding as he leads his little brother out of the room. Elliot is just as resistant, looking over his shoulder at his parents, but he follows Jack willingly, his comments about how he thought mommy would be happy fading as they get further away. 

Aaron returns all of his attention to Emily and he kisses the side of her head, still rubbing soothing circles on her back as she calms down. 

“You know,” he says softly, kissing the side of her head again, chuckling wryly, “You could have just said no. I wouldn’t have been offended.” 

His attempt at a joke, the dry humour she usually loves, pulls her out of it and she stands back, still keeping her connection to him, her eyebrows furrowed, “What?” 

He clears his throat, “If you didn’t want to marry me.” 

She releases a noise somewhere between a laugh and a sob, “I thought you didn’t want to marry me.” 

It’s his turn to frown, and he reaches up to tuck some of her hair behind her ear, his fingers lingering on her cheek, “Where on earth did you get that idea from?” 

“Dave said…” she drifts off and she narrows her eyes, shaking her head as she wipes tears from her cheeks, “He knew didn’t he?” She asks, tilting her head at him, “He knew you were going to propose.” 

He nods and wipes away another tear from her cheek, “He knew. What did he say to you?” 

She blows out a breath and shakes her head, “He said…he told me you didn’t want to get married again. So when you…when the boys…” she chokes on a laugh, unsure how to put it into words, how to explain how overwhelmed she feels. Her lower lip trembles as the laugh turns into a sob, “It’s been a hell of a day.” 

He feels a wave of anger rush over him at his friend, even though he knows Dave would have simply been trying to throw her off the scent, well aware that Aaron was at home setting up to propose. He pushes the feeling away for now, knowing it isn’t the time, and he focuses all of his attention on Emily. Aaron notices as she adjusts her gait and he guides her over to one of the dining room chairs. Once she’s sitting down, one of her hands on her bump, he crouches in front of her, putting himself in her eye line as he rests his hand over hers.

“Why did he say that to you? What were you even talking about?” 

She feels embarrassment wash over her, her cheeks burning with it, and she sighs, “I was going to propose to you,” she says, clearing her throat as she avoids eye contact, “On February 29th. And I asked him for advice on something,” she smiles tightly as she briefly looks at him, “I guess he was trying to throw me off the scent.” 

“You were going to propose?” 

She nods and laughs at herself, “Yeah, I was. Pen put the idea in my head, and I realised I really just want to be your wife.”

“Penelope put the idea in your head?” He asks and she nods, laughing at herself. 

“Yeah on girl's night a couple of weeks ago,” she admits, furrowing her eyebrows as she thinks about JJ’s behaviour, how she’d changed the subject so quickly and she sighs, “JJ knew too didn’t she.” 

“She helped with the ring,” He says, and he smiles softly as he cups her cheek, making her look at him, “I really want to be your husband, you know that right? I want that more than anything.” 

She places her hand on his on her cheek and links their fingers together, “I love you,” she says, sniffing as he wipes away a tear again, catching it before it barely leaves her lashline, “I love the kids. I love our life together.” 

“I love you too,” he says, leaning in to kiss her, “I love the boys,” he laughs, the sound catching in his throat as he clenches his jaw to stop himself from crying, “I love this little girl,” he says, his hand back on her belly, “I love it all,” he smiles as she leans forward and kisses him, her hand on the back of his head as she holds him in place. When they pull back she rests her forehead against his, both of them enjoying the silence for a moment before he speaks again, “You didn’t answer.”

She pulls back and tilts her head at him, “What?” 

His smile gets wider and he shifts into a kneeling position, pulling the ring box he never got the chance to show her out of his pocket. She presses her lips together to suppress her smile as he opens the box, a ring she would have chosen for herself staring back at her. 

“Will you marry me?” He asks, his smile nervous again, as if he didn’t already know her answer. As if it wasn’t written all over her face. 

“Yes.” 

-x-

....i guess i could write the wedding if y'all wanted it. And, more importantly, them getting their revenge on Dave.

-x-

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#emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner fanfiction #emily prentiss fanfiction #hotchniss fan fic #hotchniss fanfic #aaron x emily #hotchniss fanfiction #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #hotchniss

[wordy-little-witch]

Okay so I have been…. Thinking big thinks about Agere!Buggy I can’t really put anywhere else so don’t mind me if I just drop this here. Tw for involuntary regression and Buggy having a not so fun time being little tough.

Personally I can really easily see as Buggy being someone who you… wouldn’t necessarily pick out as being regressed when it happens, partly because his upbringing was more unusual, living on a pirate ship and all, which means what he wants and needs tend to be different from people who grew up with a relatively normal childhood on an island or similar.

Buggy gets even more of a temper when he starts to regress, flips out more, seems to be ticked off at the smallest things, but not in his usually flamboyant, constant screaming manner, but more in a way that insinuates that he’s five minutes away from completly shutting down. When he finally retreats to a place where he’s alone he will most likely wreck parts of his room in anger and frustration, before breaking down quietly sobbing, because what Buggy longs for during those times aren’t toys or games specifically. When he feels small he longs for the feeling of someone playfully ruffling his hair and telling him „It’s gonna be fine kid.“ he longs for the times someone lifted him and Shanks on their shoulders while his family their crew was celebrating till deep into the night, he misses gruff men with calloused hands teaching him how to tie a decent knot. He misses a time before he had to grow up way, way quicker than even he would have thought, a time where Roger dying seemed like a nightmare you half remember the next day thinking to yourself how you could even come up with something like that. A time where Shanks would drive him to insanity but he also was certain he would sail him to the edge of the world. And no toys and no games will ever give that back to him.

Closing this angst fest out with saying that I actually do believe he could still gain some comfort from being little if the circumstances allow it. Both Mihawk and Crocodile fill in roles that in some ways would have fit in well with the Oro Jackson back in the day.

Crocodile is a big and intimidating man, not really cruel to him anymore but it would be a stretch to call him „nice“, yet little Buggy immediately feels relaxed in his presence, maybe even more so than big Buggy. He can count on Crocodile to protect him, even if he’s scolding the clown for being a pain in the ass, he doesn’t have to worry about anyone when he’s with Crocodile, strong, smart, wise Crocodile, who always seems to hug him just a bit closer when he feels small, even if he tries to play it off as casual pda towards his lover when they are in public.

The same goes for Mihawk, who’s imposing in a different way, but who has a natural knack at finding out what Buggy needs. Who can snark „Your bad mood is intolerable. You should lay down until you cooled off.“ and Buggy can whine and moan all he wants about that, his big side even haughtily proclaiming he doesn’t need to listen to Mihawk seriously assign him „Nap time“, but who more often than not find himself waking up next to Mihawk on their fancy couch, the swordsman reading a book next to him and seemingly paying no attention to him, but also Buggy doesn’t remember that he laid down with a blanket when he first slinked up next to Mihawk in the first place.

And if there was ever any room for a happy ending including Shanks, their crews would definetly see them emerge from the woods of an island they have just docked at, late in the evening. Both of their captains bantering and laughing, carrying a bucket of fish they just caught. They both look like messes, full of dirt and apperantly fruit juices, and Shanks just laughs when Yasopp asks what on earth they where doing. „We found some blackberry bushes and had a blackberry fight.“ neither of their crews fully get it but they do notice that their captains seem lighter after those days.

Jesus christ on a motorbike YES YESYES GIMME ALL YOUR THOUGHTS I will hoard them like a dragon I SwEaR!!!!!

Buggy would absolutely have really hyperspecific needs that he can't articulate or even fully grasp, big OR little.

Like.

The bit with Crocodile?? That makes him teeter more than most things. Big, Warm, Calloused Hands make him melt in every way imaginable but when Croc pats his head or gives him a squeeze, part of him just unfurls a teeny tiny little bit.

Mihawk just showing his care casually and quietly is always a good tale, especially with "assigning nap time" and the casual little blanket bit, just aaaaAAAA♡♡♡♡

And the TEMPER tes, Buggy has negative emotional regulation skills, but regressed?? That threshold just EVAPORATES. He'll slip sway, rage, and shatter alone because solitude is the safest thing to him. Maybe a few HIGHLY trusted people know, but... honestly, I think it'd be wild if Cabaji and Mohji knew, but once the Impel Down Thing happened and they went with Alvida as a captain, it fundamentally Altered Buggy's trust in them. Like. On the one hand, absolutely survival, he gets it, but on the other hand that's his crew, his people, and it stings ((and reminds him of another crew, one he trusted with his heart and soul and safety, who left him in pieces, bloodied and hunted because his father was killed and nobody was enough of an adult to help the literal children in their care)).

Also:

Buggy having weird little things he associates with childhood and the sensation there, it all being unusual to most is absolutely true 110%, no 1000000%. Learning knots just AAAAAAA Buggy regressing and his favorite toy being a rope kinda kills me /pos AND /neg.

Just. Imagine fir a minute all these small things culminating up until Crocodile and Mihawk get faced with smth mundane and typical like a stuffed animal or a certain toy, and Buggy just.... doesn't understand. He doesn't even recognize it. He's not entirely sure what the heck this thing is even meant for. Crocodile bought it, bc he's the type to spoil people, and Mihawk helped pick it out bc it was a generic thing, but there's zero recognition. And that hurts.

They knew Buggy's regression went hand in hand with the traumas and experiences he had, but this... it just slots all these pieces together in both men's heads that this honestly happened. Buggy was hurt as a child; an innocent child was stained in fear and blood and grief.

As for Shanks, I can see Buggy and him being aware of the stints where Buggy goes NUCLEAR even as a child, and them having a tentative system set up because they were Red and Blue, Shanks and Buggy, the literal embodiments of Ride Or Die. They are a package deal, Do Not Separate. So when it was just them after Roger disbanded the crew, they already had a solid basis. Roger helped somewhat, but nearing the end, he was sicker. They began pulling back, trying to let him rest as much as they could. So on their own, not much changed.

I'm also incredibly soft for the Shanks-And-Buggy-Never-Really-Separated concept ((#Thanks-Stereden)) so just. Them having frequent calls over Denden, safe and protected from prying ears, where Buggy was Big, Little, In Between and Shanks delighting in it all.

The day they all meet up, crews mingling, they go into the woods to look for a treasure maybe, and Buggy is always the safest with Shanks, can actually let loose a little more, can just BE. And one thing leads to another and they find the blackberries and Buggy drops because who else can he trust but his Red? His Red who is so very vulnerable, looking off to the treeline... they come back a mess, tired but happy, and Buggy's still not quite Big but not fully Small, but he's comfortable, he's happy, and he's very very excited to drag Red over to Hawky and Croccy because the got SO many fishes and berries and it isn't beri, but they're still good-!!

Ough I'm feral, shaking the bars of my cage THANK YOU ILYSM this ask made my dayyyyy ♡♡♡♡♡♡

#little buggy #agere buggy #agere one piece #sfw agere #buggy the clown #buggy headcanons #he's just a little guy #i will project on the clown #asks

[marisoft-paint-adventures]

Pgs. 309 - 384

so there’s this guy.

he has an intro.

and

he’s pretty cool.

he’s so cool he has a shitty galaxy reflection in his shades.

his name is David and his room looks like this.

Dave’s room is the most kind of guy room ever, I can just feel his entire personality here, and I can also feel the “this dude has no parental guidance outside of an equally unorganized brother” energy.

Dave is just a hyperspecific Guy, a real type of Guy, he’s even described as liking obscure bands and shit, Hussie was airing something out when making him.

Anyway, these are your copies of the beta you received in the mail recently. You've labeled them with your name in BOLD RED PRINT to distinguish them from your BRO's copies, who labeled his in kind. Neither of you really gives a shit about this game or has any intention of playing it, but you'll be damned if you'll let that get in the way of your campaign of one-upmanship.

the Lalondes and Striders have a lot of parallels going on between each other with their dynamics and situations. 1 thing that sets them apart is that the perception of an insane mindgame rivalry seems to be more truthful on Dave’s end compared to Rose. Rose thinks that even a fucking fancy pillow is some kind of symbol of scorn and spite in the waterfall of irony and insincerity. while there’s not much seen out of Dave and Bro’s relationship on a normal day, the stupid ass stealth moves that Bro pulls out in order to get Dave’s goat really implies that there is a genuine absurd rivalry going.

also they’re just brothers. when there’s brothers in fiction, they either hate each other or like each other but still fuck with each other just for the sake of Being Brothers.

Dave: Bleat like a goat and piss on your turntable.

You would never consider allowing any fluid even remotely resembling urine to touch your beloved TURNTABLES. That would risk breaking them, and a world without the gift of your godly science just doesn't sound like a place you want any part of. While you're at it, you might as well wipe out human civilization with a meteor or something ridiculous like that which will probably never happen. That sort of thing only happens in stupid idiot movies for stupid idiots.

You will however contemplate bleating like a goat for IRONICALLY HUMOROUS purposes at a later date.

Dave is so lame.

FUCKING APPLE JUICE BABY. YEAH LOVE THAT SHIT. TOP 3 FRUIT JUICES ON THE TIERLIST WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

he’s gonna say it, he’s gonna say the thing.

yeah this is the OS design I’m attached to the most, I grew up with Windows 7 which basically did everything Vista did but a bit more glassy, so this is up my fucking ally. look at those GRADIENTS, look at all that GLOSS, it’s so fucking good.

HE SAID IT.

I love Hussie’s fake UI I love it.

I also love Dave Strider’s blog, he said the n-word on it

not joking you can check for yourself.

FUCKING SWEET BRO AND HELLA JEFF YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

SBAHJ is so damn interesting because it’s the Homestuck thing that has the furthest reach out of the entire comic but at the same time people don’t even know it’s Homestuck.

true story: my 1st ever exposure to Homestuck without even knowing it was when I was like 12 years old and watched a fucking VanossGaming GMod video in which they played that masterpiece SBAHJ map.

seeing a giant shittily compressed texture that just said AIDS which spun around in a circle and fucking instantly killed anything it touched was literally formative for my sense of humor.

the backstory is also absolutely beautiful, imagine dropping your armature Gamer Webcomic™ on the Penny Arcade forums only for Future Homestuck Artist Andrew Hussie to come in and completely shit on your comic by turning it into the worst form of art you have ever seen which would then turn into its own popular comic.

I really like the utility of SBAHJ as an in-universe source of memes and in-jokes for all the kids to reference rather than forcing relevance by shoving in memes that were popular at the time. it really helps make Homestuck feel... not exactly timeless per say, but more relatable in way that supersedes generations.

I say this because I fucking know for a fact real ass memes come in later on in the comic and they get really fuckin annoying.

I would kill someone for a Midnight Crew adventure, you would not believe how far I would go for this to be real.

TT: In some cultures the persistent refusal of a lady's invitation to play a game with her would be a sign wanton disrespect. TT: Either that, or flagrant homosexuality.

STOP JOKING ABOUT DAVE LIKING MEN YOU DO NOT KNOW OF THE FUTURE CONSEQUENCES IT HAS.

it is here where Dave and Rose immediately become the best fucking character dynamic ever.

TT: Sometimes I wonder how you are ever allowed to pay for meals in restaurants. TT: It must be hard to keep a low profile when you're always overhearing awed voices whisper, "It's that guy who has a blog." TG: seriously TG: dudes be worshipping me left and right TG: i cant hardly walk down the street without stepping over torsos of the prostrate TT: Navigating the urban landscape I'm sure is difficult enough without an obstacle course of deferential flesh and skyward asses. TT: Perhaps adapting the art of parkour to your unique environment would help? TG: yeah! TG: i mean damn TG: like theres this scruffy little shit at my feet TG: an orphan or something i dont know TG: face flush on the pavement TG: im like dude you listening for a stampede of buffalo or something? TG: he braves a look at me then gives my shoe a little kiss and scurries the fuck off TT: Heavy is the crown. TG: yeah TG: not kicking oliver twist in the fucking face every day is my gift to the world i guess

also the little "yeah!" he does in excitement of parkour before he corrects himself back to serious coolguy mode is fucking perfect.

aw what the fuck put that shit away.

Dave’s Phat Beat Machine may be a silly joke about shitty fucking DJ machines that have weird pre-made beats and sound effects but some of this shit slaps when you play them at the same time ngl. 11 and 12 together is really fuckin good.

also Captain Planet is in this flash.

maybe Dave is cool, no one else could catch and open that apple juice with such finesse.

this is a really great series of expressions, he is so mad. he can’t stop thinking about PISS.

HE’S SO MAD.

oh god.

oh god they’re here.

You glance at one of the many RADICAL PUPPETS in your BRO'S collection and nod in approval. Is there anything not awesome about your BRO? No, you think not.

this is not cool this is very not cool.

why is the little man in the SHOWER, bro does not BATHE, he is made of WOOD.

he is simply having a terrible, terrible day.

why did he do this.

HOLY SHIT IT’S DAVE’S IRONIC SELF PORTRAIT.

this is why Dave’s sylladex shit is the best sylladex shit, sheer frustrating mathematics leading to renaming items into weird synonyms and yelling out shit to fucking send out swords.

LOOK AT HIM.

he changed his tune so fast, he went from imposing and about throw down to just...

:o

now how will he play the funny Sburb??? what will he do to get out of this situation- WIZARD.

GIANT, STONE, WIZARD.

girl is not having it.

it is here we get the entire downlow of this maddening mother-daughter relationship through the totally not biased eyes of Rose. I mean look at this shit:

Your mother clearly has no real affinity for these damnable things. She only collects them to spite you. If anything, she finds them even more repellent than you do. She's just a committed woman.

A while ago you gave this as an ironic gift to your MOM for mother's day. You even customized it with a drink holder to support one of her ubiquitous ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES. She "liked" the gift so much, she had it bronzed and put on this pedestal. She even left it plugged in so it can still be turned on now and then. But never to do any cleaning. It never leaves this display.

The PRETTY PRINCESS DOLL has been sitting there for months, ever since your mother got this abomination for your birthday as a totally PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE gesture. You decided to make it much less abominable by knitting Her Majesty a new head and new arms. Now it brings a mischievous smile to your face whenever you walk by. Your mother hasn't removed the doll yet, and probably never will. She would never be the one to blink first.

This was a drawing you did of your cat JASPERS when you were younger, along with a poem about him. Your mother bought this ostentatious $15,000 frame for it, and had it welded to the door.

Using the colorful MAGNET LETTERS, you recently left a succinct message, which may or may not have been directed toward anyone in particular. But you couldn't find the letter W, so you just stuck two V's together.

Your mother then purchased a fresh pack of W's and left them there for your convenience. Appreciative of the thoughtful gesture, you left her a sincere THANK YOU NOTE, which you had legally notarized, and then marked with a drop of blood.

But part of it was touching the floor, so your mother was kind enough to lift the lower portion of the document with a VELVET PILLOW.

this entire cavalcade of fucking overly professional stupidity really just symbolizes the daily Lalonde struggle. again, way more of an actual thing compared to the baking menace in Washington, Rose does not feel loved enough, she projects contempt onto every action of her mother, even if they’re completely genuine, who’s also literally an alcoholic. but at the same time, this is ridiculous. I can bet that the mere thought of any of this coming off as mean-spirited to Rose is just flying over Mom’s head because she’s too busy cleaning shit or getting drunk. she’s so sincerely nice but also too damn ignorant, while at the same time going completely overboard in every sense just because she can. “oh look at this!! my daughter’s very own drawing!!! it’s so nice!!! let me put it in an expensive frame and then weld it straight onto the fridge!!! :)))))” and then Rose sees this and just goes “SHREW!!! DAMNED SHREW!!!” meanwhile Mom’s just taking this as “oh she’s spelling words on the fridge!!! :))))) but she has no Ws..... :((((( I’ll buy some for her!!! that will satisfy her needs!!! :)))))” and I guess Rose takes a break from the absolute scorn she’s building up in her system to make the most polite ass note all like “Dearest Mother Lalonde, I thank thee for this humble present.” and notarizing it with BLOOD. of course this has to end with Mom walking in, seeing this note and going “how thoughtful!!!” and then sliding a god damn pillow just for the presentation.

it is my firm belief that the Lalondes are just kind of off the fucking wall inherently, literally all of them just do wacky shit like this without question.

fandom mischaracterizations are so frequent that they’re not even a surprise, but this concept of Rose being this completely serious and levelheaded girl who’s always moody and brooding and never puts up with stupid shit is something I cannot understand how anyone picked up from her. she has a sense of humor, a really damn good one, a lot of the comedy can be attributed to her dialogue. she’s not dead serious, she literally knits Lovecraft monsters in purple for goofs and does something like the above while no one is around. and in no possible way is she running on full logic and reasoning because she plays weird mind games with her mom and later on just goes insane and destroys shit for the hell of it. there really is more to Rose than just “goth = serious smart.”

a lot of this extends to Kanaya as well because I guess people just write the 2 of them as the same person, as we all know, couples can’t be together unless they completely overlap on the Venn diagram of their personalities, hobbies, and interests, but that’s for later.

AND THEN SHE PAYS FOR THE FUCKIN MAGNET. WHO DOES THIS.

MOTHER JUMPSCARE.

And of all things to be doing during a power outage. She's up to her IRONIC HOUSEWIFE routine again. That mop bucket doesn't even have any water in it! What an absolute madwoman.

I like how Rose calls this some kind of weird irony chore that no sane individual would do without a hint of joking, she really expects too much out of Mom. a real core part of this relationship is how Rose assumes that her mother is operating on the same high level thinking as her, when in reality she’s just doing actual housewife stuff genuinely. the bucket being empty is even part of Rose overthinking all of this, Mom’s using a Swiffer, she doesn’t need water, she just brought the bucket because it completes the housewife look.

I don’t know if that latter part was intentional or if Hussie just didn’t know how Swiffers worked.

NYOOM.

SICK TRICKS.

ah fuck.

the Strider household is such a very specific home aesthetic of “complete fucking disaster, the likes of which you have never seen, owned by 2 dudebros who like Eminem.” this visual style is so poignant that the best way Dave fixes a window is with straight black tape, how classy.

big fan of how everyone talking to Jade starts to smile, she just has that energy. I mean look at Dave, you see that single raised pixel? that’s him smiling! he’s got joy! and he’s so much more genuine when he’s talking to her too, she’s literally the one person in the friend group where he can drop the whole image of “I am so fucking Cool and Real and Awesome and Swag.” they play off of each other really damn well, no wonder DaveJade is a really big ship.

TG: say hi to your grand dad for me too ok GG: ._. GG: yes i guess an encounter with him is almost certain GG: it is usually........ GG: intense!!! TG: well yeah isnt it always with family

this is the non-embarrassing parallel to John talking about Dad with Rose. Dave’s probably thinking to himself, “ah yes, she too knows of the struggle of high octane anime fights in the middle of the house.” meanwhile Jade’s talking about yelling at a corpse.

also JADE KNOWS THE FUTURE??? HUHHHH???? HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE???????????

#homestuck liveblog #hs liveblog #hs reread #liveblog #reread #live read #liveread #homestuck #hs1 #hs #home22tuck #Act 2 #flash #rose lalonde #dave strider #jade harley #Beta Kids #mom lalonde #guardians

[henreyettah]

I NEED TO SPEAK MY TRUTH OK LISTEN UP.

(let me preface this by saying that I myself am an american, so its fine if I say things like this. I dont live in the states).

The WORST thing ever for me is when US-Americans “discover” “new” things. Things that have been around for decades, if not centuries, in other parts of the world. Like that flavored water thing y'all got going rn. First of all, that is not water anymore. Secondly, it isn't juice either because theres no fucking fruit in there. Third, it’s not a substitute for water!! I see y'all chugging it like crazy but theres so much stuff in there!! all those syrups!! what the hell!!

Babygirl. Babes. You are drinking saft. Water with flavoring syrup. is just STRAIGHT UP SAFT. god this is like when they “discovered” reusable dishcloths. or reusing plastic bottles. it drives me INSANE. not to mention when y'all found out about hot glue and started using it for everything (listen it is useful but I’ve seen some of y'all make shelves out if it. ITS NOT GONNA CARRY WEIGHT. ITS GOING TO BEND AND SAG).

It’s fine that y'all are drinking saft. Great even, I’m happy y'all are trying new things! We drink it here too. It’s nice, it tastes good, theres different flavors, you can choose how flavored you want it to be by adding more of the goop. But, and I cannot believe this needs to be said, its not interchangeable with water. YOU NEED TO DRINK ACTUAL WATER 

#rant #most importantly: ITS NOT FLAVORED WATER. ITS SAFT. GOD #sorry I just #it gets me going #flavored water is when you put like some lemon or cucumber or pieces of fruit in the water and it tastes faintly of the added thing. #it is NOT 5-7 pumps of syrup! that's saft! #'flavored water' gå och LÄGG DIG #jag klarar inte av det längre!!!! i cant do it!!!! det är saft!!! jag blir galen asså im gonna scream #I know y'all are sheltered from the outside world over there and that it isn't your fault #but honestly

[sureuncertainty]

i'm sorry i just.

oral allergy syndrome already is so not talked about ever that whenever I bring it up people act like i'm insane, and they're like WAIT YOU CANT HAVE ANY FRUITS? YOUR'E ALLERGIC TO FRUITS? WHAT? HOW? and dealing with waiters making snide comments to me when i order hamburgers without lettuce and tomato and having to force myself not to eat foods that I used to love because of how many times i did it anyway making my reactions get worse and worse to the point where my throat and lips swell up if i even get some of the juice on something i'm eating, and how I can't even cut fruits and vegetables without gloves on bc if even a little bit of juice gets on my hands they break out in burning hives, and I'm constantly having to educate people on it

so it's just suuuper great (/s) to read someone's post saying point blank that it's "not a real allergy" or "just" oral allergy syndrome and just overall downplaying its severity on a post that's otherwise great info and important!

i've dealt with OAS since I was twelve, and it's gotten EXPONENTIALLY worse bc of how many times I would still eat foods i knew would trigger it bc i didn't think it mattered. bc i didn't think it was a real allergy. it completely undercuts the ENTIRE POINT of a post that's supposed to be about how important it is NOT TO DO THAT by saying that OAS is not a real allergy. it is literally an allergic reaction, and it literally gets worse the more you eat food that triggers it and it is a real allergy that matters and deserves accommodations and respect

Im constantly educating people on it and it's hard enough having no one know what it is to have people going out and making allergy PSAs that acknowlege it but then say that it's 'not a real allergy'. fuck you

#win rambles #okay rant over

[satoriberry]

miscellaneous tokimitsu aoshi headcanons (currenty exploding with love for this guy lets just do this)

watch out for: shidou ryusei, maybe slight tokiaryu but its platonic lol

has stomach issues from being so stressed all the time. give the boy a laxative pls :(

his favourite fruit is mangoes. sits in his home all summer eating them to the point where you could see mango juice stains all over his face (yknow, like spaghetti sauce on lil babies)

since he doesn't like cream based desserts (source: in the manga books somewhere, not sure cause i got this from twitter translations lol), he can't really join the guys when they're getting icecream which makes him sad but aryu insists on getting sorbet with him because "dairy causes me to breakout". in reality, its because he doesnt want aoshi to feel left out

used to have braces from ages 11-14 and literally gets flashbacks of that era

almost had his first kiss during a spin-the-battle game at a party in his first year but chickened out last second

doesn't like chewy candy like starbursts or hard gummies because the amount of force needed to chew on them puts him edge (calm down its just candy lmfao)

kind of popular between the girls, but not the ones from his class cause they know how much of a worry-worm he is

does not understand shidou, like, at all. especially his hair. they were in the showers once and tokimitsu attempted to compliment the blonde dye in his hair, but then shidou was like "its not dyed, its natural". tokimitsu proceeded to physically turn 180° and pretend he didnt open his mouth in the first place

even though he's really proud of his physique and muscles, he sometimes gets jealous of those guys that can rock really baggy clothes without their body's silhouette being visible :(

has a fascination with hair textures, eg: wavy, curly, coily. he has plain hair so he finds it so interesting how hair can have different shapes

a good swimmer but the idea of drowning overpowers his want to swim more often

if you asked him 'who's the hottest player you've ever seen' he'll say aryu cause he has no real answer. but, subconciously, he knows its oliver.

helps old people cross the street, even if its inconvenient for him

a bitch for noise-cancelling headphones. they save his life when public noises are too stimulating

likes collecting cute socks as a hobby but doesnt tell anybody about it

INSANELY jealous of people with nice nails or simply decent ones because his are so worn down from all the biting and stress chewing

favourite type of clothes are basketball shorts and crewneck sweaters

his skin is so soft its crazy. he doesnt even care about it but at all times he's??? just??? shining???? glistening and bright.

#berry.writes <3 #i cant contain myself he's so PERFECT #i want to kiss him so bad #cute lil guy #an adorable one #i am normal about him. #aoshi tokimitsu #tokimitsu aoshi #blue lock #blue lock headcanons

[tangledbeast]

I watched the end of a Peppa Pig episode because I’m a glutton for punishment. It was more insane than I could have ever imagined.

Ms. Rabbit is giving smoothie samples at the grocery store. Peppa is dumb as fuck and asks what a smoothie is. Rabbit says it’s a drink made of fruit and you can put any fruit you want in it. Peppa gets her smoothie. Now George gets to pick what kind of smoothie he wants.

“Strawberries” he says

Fucking Peppa says, “No, it has to have lots of types of fruit”

Bitch, the rabbit just said you can put whatever you want in it. So what if he just wants strawberries in it? But Peppa is God, so the rabbit puts a bunch of random shit in the blender and calls it ‘dinosaur juice’ so George will drink it. Then Peppa asks for some dinosaur juice. After already having her smoothie! Give everyone else a turn you greedy hog. But then. BUT THEN

A sentient family of fruits and vegetables appears. “We love fruit and carrots!” says Peppa. After drinking them blended up in a glass. What the fuck. That’s like someone going up to Peppa and saying “I love ham and bacon” Did nobody consider the implications of this?

But everyone just laughs and the episode ends. Horrifying.

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #008

“if there’s a god, why did he let the devil do his work on me?”

Are you currently mad at anyone? Nah, not actively. Do you like drawing on cement with chalk? I loved drawing with chalk as a kid. I mean I probably still would, but my fat ass and inadequately-muscled legs are NOT letting me get on the ground if I want back up, haha. When was the last time you went tanning? I've never deliberately tried to tan because I hate the feeling of heat literally cooking me. Do you like the smell of fresh cut grass? No. Have you ever worked at a party store? No. Are you creative? I think I am and have been told I am. Do you know how to play poker? Haha, it's funny, I did at a certain age as a kid, but now remember nothing as an adult. Do you always wear your seatbelt? Yes, always. Do you sing in the shower? No. Showers are fucking torture for me because of my legs so I get in and get the fuck out as fast as possible, I'm not concentrating on anything else. Have you ever been called a slut/whore/something along those lines? Only playfully by friends, never seriously. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly/didn't even know? Yes. Do you do drugs? No. Where do you want to get married? I have a few ideas. The absolute dream wedding would be in some sort of beautiful gothic building, like an old mansion, in the ballroom. I'll tell you right the fuck now I couldn't even dream of affording a venue like that though, so a more realistic option would be in some autumn woods, maybe by water or even a waterfall. Have you ever made yourself throw up? So, uh... I have tried. At my last job, when I was in the restroom having a panic attack and crying, I stuck my finger down my throat trying to force myself to vomit to give myself an extra reason to go home. And let me add how fucking TERRIFIED I am of the sensation of vomitting, if that helps give you an idea of how severely I was panicking. It didn't work. Honestly I probably would've kept trying if my co-worker hadn't come into the restroom making sure I was okay. Approximately two hours of fucking disaster. Have you ever fallen in love with a really good friend of yours? Haha yeah, I'm dating him rn. Do you own a blacklight? Not to my knowledge. Do you like fruit better than vegetables? Oh, absolutely. Have you ever been expelled from school? No. Do you believe you've met your soulmate or one of them? I don't believe in the concept of "soulmates." When did you last have grape juice? Literally the worst flavor of juice, ugh. I tried some back in March at the hospital because I really didn't want water, but I took one fuckin sip and got some water lmao. Have you learned anything today? Yeah honestly, but I don't wanna write an essay about it. Do you like the smell of coconut? Sure. It's not a favorite or anything, but it still smells fine. Do you prefer longer or short socks? Oh god, I used to be ALL over ankle socks, not feeling the sock stop there drives me FUCK-ING insane, like I can't wear them. I like socks that are at a normal length, really. Not terribly high, not very low. Do you like to leave your window open at night or do you use a fan? I have two fans that are always on in my room. If you find a spider in your home, do you set it free or kill it? I actually haven't been in this position in a very, very long time, considering these days I would want to catch it and let it out. How many pets have you had in your lifetime? I literally couldn't count, especially when we had a cat problem growing up. Do you sunburn easily? Ludicrously easily. What did you get into trouble for as a kid? Mostly for reasons related to being on the computer too much, fighting with my younger sister, and uhhh... idk. I was a good kid. What's something good that has happened here recently? Uh... idk. Like, there's stuff ig, but nothing remarkable. Who did you last say "I love you" to? My boyfriend. When did you last feel beautiful? Ugh I never do. ^ tries his hardest to assure me I am, but I just honest to god don't see what he does. Are you currently frustrated over something? Yeah. I just don't feel like getting into it. Have you ever had a yard sale? Yes. Do you enjoy going to yard sales or garage sales? It's not something we really *do*, but Mom and I both do like looking at random and obscure stuff. Do you like gummy bears? I do, gummy candy is the best. Do you ever get room service when staying in hotels? We barely ever, ever stay in hotels, but any time we have, we haven't gotten room service, to my memory. Who knows you better than anyone else? My mom. Sara. Have you ever caught a fish? Many, growing up going fishing all the time with Dad. Can you honeslty say you love the last person you kissed? I can very very confidently say I'm in love with him. What does your last text mesage say? I don't feel like checking, but I think it was Dad sending me a picture from the plane he'd just boarded to go to Michigan (or Ohio?) to see family. What does the last person you kissed name start with? "D," though I don't call him by this name. How many people have you kissed in the last 5 months? One. When did you last have sex? Still never lmao we just haven't gotten to that point yet for multiple reasons I'm not gonna elaborate on. Like we're perfectly comfortable doing it, there are just a number of reasons why we haven't. When did you lose your virginity? ^ Does anyone call you baby? Girt, sometimes. It's not a regular, and I prefer it that way. What do you currently hear? "Armee der Tristen" by Rammstein. It's never going to end y'all Who was your first love? Jason, my high school boyfriend. What would you do if your doctor told you, you were pregnant? Well, given what I just said a few moments ago, I'd tell them they physically couldn't have the right person because I don't believe in immaculate conception. Do you still watch MTV? "Still?" I never did to begin with. Does the person you like know you like them? I make it pretty obvious. If you're dating someone how long have you been together? 10 months. What’s the longest relationship you have ever been in? 3 1/2 years. Do you know anyone who has gotten an abortion? Yes, and I promise you do too. It's not rare. People just don't talk about it because of the stigma. Have you ever kissed in the rain? Yeah. Have you ever spent the night with the last person you kissed? He literally spent the night a couple days ago. He's done it in the past too. I've never stayed at his place yet, though. Do you have a bad reputation? I wouldn't know, go ask people I associate with. Have you ever gone through a bad breakup? *performs Sign of the Cross* Has anyone ever used a cheesy pickup line on you? Idk, maybe. Would you ever want a statue made of you? Uh, ew. Has anyone ever called you dumb? Probably at some point. If we're including myself, then yeah that's like, daily. Do you have any cats? We have one. <3 Sometimes I want one more, but more often I'm content with just Roman, especially considering he would get out-of-this-fuckin'-world jealous. Have you broken anyone's heart? I don't know. Jason chopped me off and out of his life like a gangrenous limb, completely and entirely ceasing contact that I really don't have any way of knowing exactly how the breakup affected him. Tyler ACTED like I broke his heart after two fucking weeks when I can absolutely assure you I did not. He just had insane attachment problems. God I'm glad I said "fuck this, I'm out" when I did. What’s the craziest rumor you’ve ever heard about yourself? I've only ever heard one, which was basically that Jason and I magically had a baby over one summer. It was started by his ex, who had a grudge against me even BEFORE we dated, and she clearly did not think this shit through considering I was very slim in high school and clearly NOT pregnant at any point. Anyway, I'm friends with this person now. Things sure do change, haha. What’s the coolest name you’ve ever heard someone have? Ohhhh let's see... Well, I did have a friend named Journee (like "Journey") which I always thought was a beautiful, brilliant name for a person just going through and experiencing life. I am sadly 90% sure though she committed suicide because of something very serious she was dealing with at way too young of an age. No one should go through what she did, but never mind a child. She confided in me a lot, and during our last few messages, she was saying some concerning things and then just disappeared, permanently. What’s your least favorite genre of music and why? Rap, probably. I just don't like what is typically sung about and just the whole style of it. There are rap songs I love, but in general it's just not for me. What did you last complain about? I actually don't know. Did you ever like nursery rhymes as a child? What was your favorite? I did. I remember liking "The Itsy-Bitsy Spider" as well as that "This Little Piggy" one, whatever its proper name is, because it involved Mom tickling me. What do you usually purchase at gas stations? (aside from gas of course) If I get anything, it's likely to be a certain flavor of Mountain Dew, and then I'll sometimes get a sort of candy. Do you drink regular or diet soda? Only regular. The artificial sweetener in diet sodas gives me a headache, but diet is also just gross imo. What’s one of your favorite artists/bands, and least favorite song from them? All right let's go with Ozzy. There are a few of his songs I'm just sorta "meh" about, but if I remember it correctly, I believe I wasn't into "Diary of a Madman" at all. Have you ever seen them live? Bitch I would cry lmao. I would LOVE to see Ozzy, especially with it being so clear he's in his twilight years with all the health issues he's been fighting. Seeing Ozzy live would without a goddamn doubt be a very strong highlight of my life. Mom and I actually WERE planning on seeing him, all the way in Charlotte, but then that tour had to be cancelled due to the arrival of health problems. Can't say I know if he's planning another, but I would think so with a new album in the future. Do you consider graffiti to be true art or just messy? I mean, it can be both. Depends on where it's at, the content itself, everything. What last overwhelmed you? In a recent survey I mentioned that I don't know what really qualifies as sensory overload, but dear god I think I experienced it at Girt's place when Mom and I went there for an early 4th celebration. SO many people were talking about different things and I was trying to be aware and listen to everyone, but it just wasn't possible. I was so overstimulated with all the noise that I literally didn't even process what my mom was eventually saying directly to me; like I just stared at her blankly and had to come back to just me and her to understand anything. What did you last watch on TV? Girt and I were watching a Five Nights at Freddy's: Security Breach speedrun via YouTube on the TV the other night. We were curious because of the insane amount of glitches in that game how fast you could really do it. Do you know anyone who keeps a Christmas tree up year round? I mean I might, but not that I know of. What’s the strangest video you’ve ever seen? Oh brother, who knows, I've been on the Internet too long. Though I will say I actually haven't seen like... *any* of the notoriously gross and/or shocking videos because I cherish my eyes. They suck, but I cherish them lmao. Have you ever received a present that made you cry? Oh jeez, that's easy to do. Do you know of any haunted buildings in your town? No. I know of a location with false origins that portray it as haunted, but it's just literally not true. What’s the most random song on your playlist that people wouldn’t expect? HAHA at Girt's place, Mom was VERY surprised to learn Brittney Spears is on my iPod lmaooo. When did you last receive a business card from somebody? I haven't the slightest idea. Would you try that Flaming Hot Mountain Dew? ... I do wanna try it... lmaooo. I love both so I mean... leave me alone, haha. When it was first revealed, all the reactions made me feel horrible about myself, ahaha. Do you own any adult coloring books? Yeah, somewhere. What did you last draw or write down? Uh, probably my signature. Have you ever played pinball on a machine or just online? I've played it on machines before. Have you ever had a bad sunburn? I once had sunburn so bad it was actually sun poisoning. It was fucking excruciating.

#lyrics: ''patient no. 9'' by ozzy osbourne #survey #surveys #random questions

[aajjks]

y/n’s outfit! https://pin.it/508SD1wZq

BC!JK

I don't know why I run away

I make you cry when I run away

Take me back 'cause I wanna stay

Save your tears for another

Save your tears for another day

you sing to your toothbrush as you brush your teeth and listen to songs that makes you love and hate eunwoo in the same breath. you’re trying, you really are trying to move on.

last night, you cried til 4 in the morning all because you couldn’t stop looking through the old pictures and videos of you and eunwoo together. but today, or rather tonight, danielle said she’d come pick you up from your job so the two of you could go out together to clear your mind so you’re kind of excited.

you’re definitely late for work but you’re okay with being late because “save. your. tears for another daaaayyyy!!! ooohhhh yeaaahhhh” you’re saving your tears for another day or rather later tonight.

you keep your outfit simple, coveralls, a cardigan, and cute shoes for the chilly spring weather. your hair is in low twin space buns and you think you look pretty cute. you look like an art teacher and as you’re getting your belongings together, there is jungkook standing outside your door with a tray of food in hand.

“good—oh! oh, wow. good morning jungkook, did you make all of that for me?” you ask as your eyes widen at the yummy steaming food that is calling your name, begging you for a taste.

blueberry waffles, diced steak, a veggie omelette, a little cup of mixed fruits, and orange juice. what the hell? are you both married or something?

now that you think about it, no one has ever done this for you. eunwoo wasn’t much of a cook so it was you who did a lot of the cooking and you find it very interesting to see how well jungkook can cook. the beef last night was really good and looking at the tray, you’re sure the breakfast is just as good.

to say you are impressed is an understatement because who would have thought jungkook was this good at cooking? he really is a catch and any woman would be lucky to have him yet all he wants is you.

“this is so sweet, jungkook! thank you so much” you say as your hands cup your freckled cheeks in awe.

“are you coming in here to eat with me?”

Stop being so cute

No seriously for the sake of insanity. He hopes that you will stop being yourself because everything about you just gets him so soft he almost melts in a puddle.

Just look at you. You’re like an angel. So effortlessly beautiful and jungkooks favorite part about you is your spectacles. You look so adorable in your glasses, but his favorite physical feature of you are definitely your adorable, freckles.

You’re like a book character come to life that’s the only way he can describe you. “Oh yn I would love to, but I actually have to get ready for work. And I can’t really eat too much in the morning.”

He cannot believe that he is passing the opportunity to have breakfast with you, but he just wants to focus on his career as well, and he wants to prove to his father that he can be responsible and a great future businessman.

“my father he’s quite strict… and I like to be punctual as well so… I gotta go. And before I go, I have to give you the keys to the house.” He laughs, he hands you the tray quickly, and he takes the keys out of his pocket.

Of course, this is your home now too and he wants you to feel like that. “Okay sweetheart Have a good day at work yeah? and text me when you get there so I know that you’re safe.”

He can’t help but worry about you. “ I’ll try to be home early today so we can spend a little time together and maybe I’ll be of some help to you?”

He doesn’t even know what he means by that, but he just wanted to say it… he wants you to completely rely on him. He wants to prove to you that he can be the best partner for you and he is better than your last one..

He hopes that you will see his effort and appreciate him. Because that’s all he wants from you.

“Okay yn… I’m gonna go and a shower but don’t try to miss me too much while I’m gone, eh?” He winks.

#ask: bc!jk #The Weeknd supremacy

[quinndelion]

2023 was a lot.

I can't say I learned anything I didn't already know. I think it was just filled with a lot of disapointment really, and that's sort of the thing that comes with life. That's nothing new. I don't think I was wishing for anything in particular this year. Or maybe I was and I've just forgotten it now. I lose all of my memories to time. I think maybe in 2024 I should start to write my memories down in a notebook or something so I don't continue this cycle I have of forgetting everything that's happened to me.

I started this year in the hospital because I had lost all of my will to live. I seriously think I went insane or something because I went from having something to nothing and apparently nothing was too much but also not enough. If I think back really hard I can remember the food I ate when I was there. I would have the same exact thing every single day. A cheese pizza (it always came in a circle form with it cut into 4s) with extra parmasan, kraft mac and cheese and mashed potato on the side. Sometimes I'd have fruit punch or apple juice or lemonade. On the very last day I got sick of it and got a buger instead, and I only ate a few bites before I had to leave. I met a lot of people there. Some older than me, some younger, all with stories I had never heard. None of us had really wanted to be there, but I can recall so many times where we laughed. We wanted so badly to stay up past curfew and talk to eachother, so we just sat by the doors with our pillows to cheat out way out of it. I was room 13. We could change the color of our room lights. The boy next to me, his lights were always green, and he had been there so long he had pictures of his family on the wall, and album covers he had gotten printed out. My room was a complete mess. My lights were always off. We would sit by the window and look at all the cars below with people, and wonder when it would be us in those cars, leaving that place, becoming normal people again. Then we'd go to bed.

I remember thinking when I left, "I will never see any of you people again." It was sort of painful and relieving at the same time. I think about the boy, in the room next to mine, the most. He changed my vocabulary. His story changed my life. I wonder if he ever made it out of there. I wonder if he remembers the signs I taught him. I will never see him again. I will never see him again.

I got out of the hospital 2 weeks later. I went back to school. I did everything the same as I always did. I never told anyone where I had been. I never told anyone about room 13. I think this is the first time I've ever told anyone about what it was like. It doesn't really feel like anything. I guess it's nice to know that if I ever forget what it's like, it'll be here, written in a tumblr post.

I think I want to thank Mark and Kyon especially, because admitedly drawing comics really helped me through a lot of tough things I went through this year. I don't think they understood the gravity of how much it meant to me. I always got the notion that because I am so passionate and I get super into things that people think I'm odd or strange, but they never made me feel like I was odd or strange. It's why I had the confidence to continue doing fan art, or to give my opinion on things, even if I thought it was embarrasing. I'm really thankful for them, and I hope they have a great new year.

I'd like to leave everything that happened to me this year behind. I don't want to forget it, and I don't want it to disappear, but I want it to stay here where it happened, so I can truly and authenthically move on. My last piece for 2023 was a simple drawing of myself holding a sparkler. It's simple. This year I started out with no spark, and now I have one.

In 2024 I'd like to choose love.

#long post

[suckitsurveys]

How do you feel about tomato sauce with chunks of tomato? I like it. My dad makes a chunky sauce and it’s SO good.

Do people think you look like either of your parents? Does that offend you? I look more like my dad but recently someone told me they see my mom in me and it made me happy.

Do you prefer regular bacon or turkey bacon? I’m fine with either.

Are you more of a talker or a listener? Listener, but it really depends on who I’m around.

Do you think it’s weird when people talk to their pets like people? Not at all.

Where do most of your relatives live? A good handful of my dad’s side live here in Illinois. There are some on my dad’s side in California and Hawaii. And lot of my mom’s side is in Tennessee and Florida.

What is the last place, other than home, that you stayed overnight? My dad’s 2 weeks ago when my friends came into town for Lollapalooza. He has three extra rooms so he let us stay there instead of them having to get hotels.

Would you ever buy a motorcycle? No.

What is the most unusual thing in your reach right now? There’s a lot of work-related things in this room that would be considered unusual to outsiders.

Are you sitting by a window right now? Kinda. I’m not directly next to it, but it’s like 10ft away.

Do you have anything other than posters or pictures on your walls? On the walls in the office I am in right now there is a bulletin board and a calendar and some decals with the logo of the school I work for.

What is the furthest you have traveled alone? Utah.

Have you ever ridden a train? Yes.

Have you ever done something you told yourself you’d never do? Haven’t we all?

Are you tattooed? Or does it freak you out? I am tattooed.

Are you attracted to or put off by people who are heavily pierced or tattooed? I love tattoos.

Have you done anything productive today, anyway? Work shit.

Eaten anything delicious today? Not really. Just a banana. I love bananas but i wouldn’t really say that was “delicious” if that makes sense.

Have you ever taken in a stray animal? We had a kitty that lived on our back porch for a bit when I was a kid.

Do you have or want children? Nope and nope.

How do you feel about marriage? Ever been close? I am married. I love being able to share my life with someone.

Are you confident in your appearance? No.

Do you enjoying taking pictures? Sure.

Do you take pictures of THINGS, or are you just a camera whore? xD This survey is old ahaha.

Do you believe in “the one” or “soulmates”? I think there are people who end up being perfect for you, but I don’t think that’s predetermined by something.

Have you ever dated someone simply for their looks? No.

What about dating someone simply because you felt too bad to say no? Nope.

Are you eating anything right now? Nope.

Does it drive you INSANE when people chew with their mouth open? It’s gross but I don’t usually notice it tbh.

Does any food always make you sick but you love it too much to not eat it? Not really.

How do you feel about alcohol? I think it’s fine to have a drink every so often and I do, but I can’t drink heavily anymore. It makes me feel like shit. Also, my tolerance for overly drunk people has gone down DRASTICALLY recently.

Have you ever been drunk? I have.

Do you like orange juice with pulp? Sure.

Do you scream for ice cream? Yes, I love ice cream.

Which orange came first; the color or the fruit? I have no idea.

Are you in school? If so, for what? Not in school.

What is your dream job? Beach. Like Ken. Hahaha.

Have you ever experienced a natural disaster? Sure.

Do you feel bad when bad things happen to other people? Or do you not care? If you don’t, do you feel guilty about that? Definitely depends on the circumstances/situations.

Aren’t you a little nervous about posting photos online? Eh.

Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness? Mental Illinois.

What was the reason you washed your hands last? I peed.

Is there something you should be doing? Working. But I am kinda just killing time before our company picnic this afternoon.

#surveys

[survey--s]

585.

How do you feel about tomato sauce with chunks of tomato? I actually prefer it to the smoother stuff, it tastes better.

Do people think you look like either of your parents? Does that offend you? I definitely look like my dad and no, it doesn't offend me in the slightest. My dad is a good looking man.

Do you prefer regular bacon or turkey bacon? Regular bacon.

Are you more of a talker or a listener? It depends on the circumstances.

Do you think it’s weird when people talk to their pets like people? No, I do it all the time.

Where do most of your relatives live? Australia.

What is the last place, other than home, that you stayed overnight? Tracey's house while I was on a pet-sit.

Would you ever buy a motorcycle? No.

What is the most unusual thing in your reach right now? I don't know - a cat? lol.

Are you sitting by a window right now? Nope.

Do you have anything other than posters or pictures on your walls? Fairy lights.

What is the furthest you have traveled alone? Tasmania. From the UK.

Have you ever ridden a train? Sure, loads of times. I rode the train all the time as a teenager/student.

Have you ever done something you told yourself you’d never do? Sure, who hasn't?

Are you tattooed? Or does it freak you out? I have a tattoo and I actually weirdly enjoyed it. It didn't even hurt all that much and I got it done on my spine.

Are you attracted to or put off by people who are heavily pierced or tattooed? It depends on the types of tattoos and piercings.

Have you done anything productive today, anyway? Sure, I was up at seven, did laundry, vacuumed, sorted the animals, had breakfast, went to work, picked the dog up, came home, showered, had lunch and now I'm just chilling.

Eaten anything delicious today? The leftover pizza was pretty good.

Have you ever taken in a stray animal? Not a stray, but we've had two farm cats and one rescue - and we're about to take in my sister-in-laws senior cat too lol.

Do you have or want children? I have zero desire to have children lol. I remember being really broody a few years ago and I am eternally grateful it never happened.

How do you feel about marriage? Ever been close? I am married.

Are you confident in your appearance? Sure, confident enough.

Do you enjoying taking pictures? Yeah, of certain things.

Do you take pictures of THINGS, or are you just a camera whore? I used to take a constant stream of selfies but nowadays it's mostly photos of scenery, nature and animals.

Do you believe in “the one” or “soulmates”? No.

Have you ever dated someone simply for their looks? Yeah, in the past.

What about dating someone simply because you felt too bad to say no? No.

Are you eating anything right now? No, not at the moment.

Does it drive you INSANE when people chew with their mouth open? It's not really something that registers with me, in all honesty.

Does any food always make you sick but you love it too much to not eat it? No.

How do you feel about alcohol? I'm not really a big drinker.

Have you ever been drunk? Yeah, I drank a lot as a teenager/student but nowadays I'm not fussed.

Do you like orange juice with pulp? Not really. I'll drink it but it's not my preference.

Do you scream for ice cream? No. It's okay but it's not my favourite.

Which orange came first; the color or the fruit? I did know this at one point lol. I think the colour.

Are you in school? If so, for what? Nope.

What is your dream job? To never have to work ever again in my life, lol. < This is very real and also very relatable. I'd have to say same. <---- haha yep.

Have you ever experienced a natural disaster? Floods and storms, but that's it.

Do you feel bad when bad things happen to other people? Or do you not care? If you don’t, do you feel guilty about that? I mean, I don't really feel bad unless it's someone I really care about. I don't feel guilty about it, no.

Aren’t you a little nervous about posting photos online? Nope.

Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness? Yes - depression and anxiety.

What was the reason you washed your hands last? Because I'd been eating popcorn and my hands were dirty.

Is there something you should be doing? No.

#survey #surveys

[coll2mitts]

#85 The Wayward Cloud (2005)

Back in 2020, I was attempting to review the movies on the Rotten Tomatoes list by the order that they appeared (separate from the muppet side-project, cause that needed to be dealt with all at once).  It was because of this one, #85, that I gave up on that notion entirely because I could not find this movie anywhere.  The Wayward Cloud wasn't offered on any streaming sites unedited, I couldn't pay to rent it, and I couldn't buy it anywhere because the DVD was region locked.  Even attempts and um... *acquiring* it online were futile because they did not contain English subtitles.  Every time I would schedule out what movies I wanted to work on next, this was a uncompleted black spot in a sea of easily attainable media... that is until a few days ago when I found it on internet archive for free, god bless.

This is not the most bizarre musical movie I've ever watched (it's pretty tame compared to Dancer in the Dark and The Lure), and to Oklahoma!'s credit, not the only one about pornography.  It is unique in the fact that I'm pretty sure it's the only one with a 10-minute real-time rape scene.  I'm incredibly fascinated how this very quiet movie that features a lot of softcore porn shares a spot on the same list as 8 muppet-based movies, is all I'm saying.

The Wayward Cloud focuses on two protagonists, Hsiao-Kang and Shiang-chyi, who live in separate apartments of a shared building.  In the opening scene, an unknown actress dressed as a nurse is being force-fed watermelon before getting railed by Hsiao-Kang on top of it.  We discover, because of a legendary drought, that watermelons are cheaper than buying bottled water, so people are encouraged to eat or drink the fruit to hydrate themselves.  The symbolism of the watermelon is pretty overt, as a television news program states that gifting this big red fruit means you're wildly in love.   Shiang-chyi is scarfing watermelon down in her living room alone, while Hsiao-Kang is literally fingering one on top of a moaning lady.  We discover that Hsiao-Kang works as an actor in seemingly very low-budget porn films, so his passion is only faked for the benefit of the camera.  He reveals how lonely he is with his situation through a lamenting love song.

Shiang-chyi discovers Hsiao-Kang asleep on a swing in the park, and after stealing his drinkable water she decides to wait for him to wake up so she can ask him if he's still selling watches for money.  Afterward, he assists her in removing a key of hers that has been stuck in the asphalt outside of their building, and once freed, the pavement gives way to a spring of water, representing the desire that has now been released.  Her internal monologue reacts in a completely normal way, by interpreting this act of kindness as a declaration of love.

The musical numbers are a dramatic contrast to the rest of the movie, as they are colorful and surreal.  The juxtaposition between the lived reality of the characters and their energetic inner monologue is really vast and jarring.

I'm not quite sure why this statue of Chiang Kai-shek gets all Shiang-chyi's love and affection, unless it's ironically, or to symbolize her giving everything to a man who's literally giving nothing in return.  Taiwan has been gradually moving the several statues they've erected of Chiang to a specific memorial garden in Cihu as their attitude toward the exiled military leader has changed.  This one at the National Palace Museum has migrated locations since this movie came out, living in a much less conspicuous place outside of a different building.

When Hsiao-Kang goes back to Shiang-chyi's apartment, he attempts to open a locked suitcase of hers while she gives him insane amounts of watermelon juice he ultimately pours out the window when her back is turned.  They make a meal together, and we discover she is very bad at cooking, setting the greasy noodles on fire and attempting to douse it with water.   The hot veggies they place on the noodles make them move in a very unsettling way.

I'm genuinely curious if they started a fire on purpose, because it sounds as if the director writes a very loose screenplay and a lot of shit is improvised.

When the two part he doesn't kiss her or anything.  In fact, he manually presses her elevator button to send her on her way.  Then she gets to lay in bed and listen to him have sex with someone else from the apartment upstairs.  Honestly, I don't know how more clear this guy could be that he's not interested in her.

It's impressive how absolutely unsexy they make the softcore porn look in this movie.  It's mechanical and awkward.  The director himself describes sex as difficult and "rarely joyful", which, I feel, says a lot about him and less about society in general. He believes filming sex this way exposes it for what it really is as opposed to how Hollywood makes it seem.

Because the pacing of this movie is so slow (this is on purpose, put a pin in it), here's a rapid fire interactions list to keep this moving:

Hsiao-Kang climbs up a wall and Shiang-chyi force feeds him watermelon.

Shiang-chyi proves to be the worst cook ever yet again by freeing a bunch of crabs in her house.  After Hsiao-Kang comes to the rescue, they then eat the crabs in such a disgusting manner that I'm forced to believe this is someone's fetish.

Hsiao-Kang smokes a cigarette from in-between Shiang-chyi's toes before falling asleep under the dining room table.  This is the first inkling that perhaps he does like her as he touches her legs in a comforting manner as opposed to his usual indifferent demeanor.

The two protagonists go on a date, I think?

Hsiao-Kang avoids Shiang-chyi in the hallway because she's wandering around pretending to be pregnant with a watermelon.  Imagine you're some random tenant and you hear someone screaming from the stairwell and you discover it's some lady pretending to give birth to a fruit, istfg.

Hsiao-Kang is having problems getting it up, so he imagines his co-star with a traffic cone bra pleading for him to get hard.

Hsiao-Kang and Shiang-chyi make out in the Adult Film section of a video rental place, and I am in my own personal hell because watching people kiss is the grossest thing ever to me.

On their way home from gettin' freaky in public, they walk around town with her standing on top of his feet.

The end of this movie is... something else.  I was pretty much just letting this film happen to me up until this point. Like sure, it's slow and a little strange, but whatever, it's got to be someone's jam. But then... but then.

Shiang-chyi finds one of the porn actresses passed out in the elevator, and instead of calling for help she drags her into her apartment.  While this poor woman is laying passed out on the floor, Shiang-chyi starts eating watermelon while slowly realizing that one of the videos she rented features this mystery woman and Hsiao-Kang.  Shiang-chyi finds one of Hsiao-Kang's co-workers, and they drag the actress up to his flat and try to rouse her.  When that fails, the men take her clothes off and position her on the bed to film a movie anyway.

The climax of this film is the rape scene, where Shiang-chyi watches Hsiao-Kang film a video with his unconscious co-star, seemingly bearing his baggage to Shiang-chyi.  This is perhaps a way for him to explain why he's been so distant, or to reveal a part of his life he hasn't overtly told her about.  Shiang-chyi assists with the movie, moaning loudly to help Hsiao-Kang get off, and he rewards her by abruptly grabbing her face and making her swallow his cum, as if to say, here, now you can have all of me.  Literally.  She cries out of relief I'm assuming, and it's awkward as fuck to watch.  It's also framed like we should be celebrating that these two have finally discovered and accepted each other, because the credits come in with a happy song, which I guess could be read as ironic?  Maybe this whole thing is intended to be horrifying and not merely uncomfortable, but Shiang-chyi's active participation in the act makes me think that it's not meant to be read that way.  And if that's the case, I'm left wondering why we had to witness a rape for their mutual understanding to happen. Did the director think this was rape?

I tried to search for the directors intention from this but all I could find were reviews of this movie that described how the last scene is meaningful and touching like a bunch of people didn't just rape a girl on camera.

The important story here isn't necessarily the romance whatever the hell is happening between the two main characters.  The director of this movie Tsai Ming-liang, is one of the standout auteurs of "Slow Cinema", so the point is more about the vibes than the plot.  There are a lot of shots in this movie of characters unceremoniously eating watermelon, staring at the ceiling, looting through garbage, walking through hallways, and they're all designed to convey how lonely these characters are.  He absolutely succeeds at this, as the great majority of this film is well-framed wide shots of Shiang-chyi existing alone in the world, rarely encountering other humans, and having no friends to speak of.  Hsiao-Kang seems to want to be left alone, but is constantly pursued by this woman, and by nature of his job, begrudgingly performs sexual acts on camera. Tsai Ming-liang's movies focus on this dichotomy between wanting to find someone to relate to while being comfortable being alone. The two protagonists are filmed with a wall dividing them in several scenes as if they want to connect, but are incapable of doing so.

Watermelons represent the passion one feels, and Shiang-chyi is constantly sloppily eating it, forcing its juice upon Hsiao-Kang who doesn't want it, making out with the rind and pretending to give birth to it in an hallway.  When she discovers the porn actress passed out in the elevator, when retrieving water from the fridge, a watermelon rolls out and cracks on the tiled floor, forcing her to eat it when she drags the woman inside her apartment.  She gluttons herself in it, and only stops when she realizes that this actress has been fucking the man she's been lusting after. Conversely, Hsiao-Kang only partakes in the watermelon in his or Shiang-chyi's fantasies, as he must feel as if his current lifestyle prevents him from acting on any genuine feelings. It isn't until the last scene that he is open to having a real human connection with someone.  Y'know, directly after raping his costar for money.

But in being alone, it seems like both the protagonists completely disregard the wellbeing of those around them, since their singularly focused on themselves.  Shiang-chyi hordes an insane amount of drinkable water to the point where she cannot store anything in her refrigerator and is forced to bathe with toilet water in her bathroom because her tub is filled with bottles.  In a decidedly unchill move, Hsiao-Kang decides to bathe in the building's water tower since his body is covered in watermelon juice and the taps are turned off, contaminating a considerably valuable and finite resource for his own personal comfort. I can only assume their treatment of the porn actress is only further evidence of their disconnect to humanity in general.

I'm not necessarily sure if we're supposed to root for these two crazy kids to figure this shit out, because ultimately I left this movie feeling bewildered and slightly angry. I'm not writing off all slow cinema, but I'm not sure I'm interested in watching any more Tsai Min-liang films lest I'm confronted with another 3 minute shot of a woman crying with some dude's cock in her mouth.

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#100 best musical movies of all time rotten tomatoes #unwarranted opinion