#doesn’t make me a bad person

[quiet-butch12]

They are roasting u in the chat acting like they know u stay away good king. For one I don’t think ur a bad person scared for life if u cheated even tho cheating is wrong and I don’t even wanna be friends with someone who does that (I’m a purist) I think u can learn like I’ve seen good people and they admitted they cheated once and I’m like but ur such a good person! Growth homie

Thank you, I actually appreciate this. I’m trying to stay out of it and it feels like I’m on the playground with the girls whispering about me again. I did a bad thing and I owned up to it straight away and now I want to grow and become a better person. People don’t know me or what happened so they assume and drag me through the mud.

#ask #I don’t want to get involved and start a she said he said #I did a bad thing #doesn’t make me a bad person

[courtofterrasen]

Alright, clearly some of you guys are just not getting it. So no more emotion from me; I am simply going to write in factual terms.

It takes a VAST amount of work to go into creating a series like Bad Batch. You have to go through writing, scene painting, 3D modeling, rigging, lighting, SFX, voice lines, editing, final production, etc; just to name a few. It takes hours upon hours upon hours of work for those animators to create all of the nuances in a scene, let alone in Bad Batch where there is an extremely high level of attention to detail. It’s not like anime where a character and background are mostly stationary while they talk. There’s constantly stuff happening in the background and they intentionally make choices that provide extremely little to the overall story and, in all honesty, take up a significant amount of their time and can be argued that they’re wasting their time and money and effort (I don’t think so, but I’m sure people could argue it if they thought that effort should be allocated elsewhere). But they do it because it provides a deeper sense of realism to the story as a whole and make it feel like a living, breathing world. For example, when a character trips a little bit or they animated them doing something slightly harder than it would have been otherwise or eyes darting around and studying someone. These are all very little things that take them hundreds of hours to get perfect. And those are the kinds of things that go unnoticed by the vast majority of people watching the show. Either because they don’t noticed the little detail that was put in at all, or they don’t understand the level of work that goes into creating little minute decisions like that. And all of those decisions that they make, both big and tiny, are given to them in specific instructions by the directors. When you think about the insane amount of work that goes into creating a show like Bad Batch, you realize that every single little detail that they choose to add in is intentional and was given to them via specific instruction. It’s not like in live-action shows where the actor can choose to make a subtle decision on the fly. There are hundreds of thousands of hours of work that go into this and every choice that they make is intentional. The lighting dept. has even confirmed this for us, saying that all of the lighting that they did was done very carefully and intentionally and to pay attention to what’s happening in the scene. Because there’s an extremely high level of detail that’s put into the show, based off of very detailed instructions that were presented to them.

Now. Taken all of these points into account, it’s critical to look at all of the little choices that were made when it comes to her character and the way that both she interacts with the world and the people around her, as well as how they, in turn, respond to her. Because, like the lighting dept. has already made very clear to us, every design choice they has been made in the creation of the show is 100% intentional. Even if that’s not something that they had said or wasn’t something you were aware of, when you focus on the aspect of animation, it’s sometimes hard to get a clear grasp on just how long it takes them to do these things. And that every little choice that they made was carried out under specific instruction. And that’s not even getting into the nuances of voice acting and understanding the subtle distinctions in the way someone talks and being able to discern the meaning behind their words based on dialect and the instructions they were given. And for someone who just casually watches the show, absolutely none of these are important. They’re watching it to watch it and no further thought is put into it. And there’s nothing wrong with that. People are allowed to watch things at a surface level and get enjoyment out of it.

For every character, they can be broken up into various parts:

•Their visual appearance

•Their behavior

•Their interactions with others and the world

•How others respond to their character

•Their small, subtle behaviors (such as a particular twitch or repetitive body movement that can be used to convey a deeper meaning)

•And their internal motives

In that order from the least to most complex. And these topics can also be used to understand the complexity of a character. For someone like Cid, all of these topics are touched on in a variety of ways.

•She’s different from them

•She’s gruff and money hungry

•She speaks to the Batch like they’re a bunch of kids and she knows better than them

•They never fully bring themselves to trust her and, at times, they see her has a burden

•Towards the end of their time together, she gets snappier, and whenever she’s around them her movements slow ever so slightly and she furrows her brows slightly a lot more than in the past

•And in the end, she betrays them

And that’s putting her character into a single sentence for every bullet point, which, for well written characters like Cid or Hemlock or Rampart or Nala Se, cuts a lot of things out.

When it comes to the way that Phee is written and what she contributes as a whole to the show, she is not a very complex character. I’m not going to go into every single scene with her, but I am going to touch on a few. And if I need to continue the discussion further to cover more scenes, then I will. On multiple instances, she puts the Batch into very dangerous situations, and overall appears to care very little for them as people unless it gets her something that she wants. This is made very evident when, for example, she gets Omega, a child, excited about a big grand adventure and Omega then convinced the Batch to go along with it. Even though they were very adamant about not doing it. This is said with both their words and their tense body language. They don’t want Omega to get hurt and they know it’s a bad idea; but in the end she’s able to convince them. Then, when they get to the site, she shows clear lack for them or their safety and proceeds to put them in a very dangerous situation where someone could have gotten seriously hurt or killed. And she shows no remorse for it. Her language, both verbal and bodily, are very loose and nonchalant, assuring them that she had everything under control and that they were able to handle it, despite their very clear frustration. This type of behavior is shown again and again and again as they continue to interact with her. Her actions relay to the viewer that she does not respect their boundaries, or arguably, them as people. Her words are designed to be rocks with a pretty bow on them. And again, this is not personal opinion or speculation. Every single word and action was carefully designed by the team. All the tensed muscles were created by a team of people working very hard to convey that to the audience. Every thinly veiled word was guided by a director when the VA came in to record the sessions. Every single choice was intentional for a very specific reason.

Tech likes things in a very specific way. He likes his ship to be in a particular order and takes very good care of its maintenance and upkeep. He prides himself on being able to maintain a good ship. He spends a lot of time on his data pad. It’s how he was designed on Kamino. That’s his link to his role in the group. He can do everything he needs to from there and, in certain scenarios throughout the show, you can see it provides him with a sense of comfort and stability. You can see this, not only in his subtle body language, but also in his fairly obvious body language with how he hunches over it. It’s reminiscent of a child hunching over a toy to bring it closer to them and protect it. It comforts him. You can also see, when he interacts with the rest of the Batch, his aversion to touch. It’s not significantly often that you see it, given that the rest of the Batch knows him better than anyone, but there are still times when physical contact or even just very close proximity happens and he either has a reaction by tensing up slightly or leaning away from it, or sometimes he doesn’t react to it at all and almost seems to not register it; such as when he’s focused on his work. Every little reaction that he has with his brothers was scripted and orchestrated for a very specific purpose. It conveys the nuances of who he is as a unique and individual person.

Keeping that in mind, when it comes to the way she interacts with Tech specifically and the Batch, it’s very clear to understand the dynamic behind them when you look close enough. To recall a few instances, there was a time when she was recounting a story about finding a big treasure and Tech says something along the lines of “she changes this story every time she tells it”. He’s conveying to both the people in the show and us as viewers that she is a liar. She is either changing the story to make herself seem cooler, or maybe it didn’t happen at all and she’s making the entire thing up. Which, I will briefly mention again, are traits synonymous with narcissists. In another instance, Tech, Omega, and Wrecker were having a conversation where Tech is reprimanding them for bringing items back from a junkyard that they were in that they thought were cool instead of what he asked them to go find and bring back for him. I’m this conversation, Phee inserts herself and tells Tech that it’s not junk; also, in that same instance, not calling him by his name, which I will get to in a minute. Tech, in that moment, is trying to work, and his conversation with the other two was interrupted and fizzles out as Omega gets excited about the idea of a treasure map. A third is when the group is on Pabu and Phee is trying to get Tech to converse with her. His body language is hunched, tense, and he averts eye contact with her. When she prods him further, he is unsure how to engage in the conversation. And when he doesn’t respond in the way that she’s wanting him to, she talks about him to the rest of the Batch as he stands there around him and says to them how he “doesn’t know how to have fun”. And then they proceed to laugh at him. And again, you can see in his body language that he is confused as to why they’re laughing at him as well as uncomfortable being in that situation. And going off of that for another small fourth instance, there is another moment when they are getting ready to leave Pabu and she approaches Tech, who is working alone and trying to avoid contact with anyone, and says to him “So you’re just going to leave without saying goodbye?” His body language immediately tenses, he hunches further in on himself around his datapad, and his words make it clear he is both unsure and unwanting of the conversation. And when he does not respond in the way that she wants him to, she moves the datapad away from him to make him focus on her. She removes the item that brings him the most security to force him into engaging in a conversation he is uncomfortable with having. And again, these are all very intentional choices. They are not left up for interpretation. They are there to tell us what the character is feeling in that moment. They are trying to convey to us that he is uncomfortable. Not that he’s shy around a girl he thinks is pretty. And given on other scenarios that have happened throughout the show, it’s very clear that interpersonal relationships with anyone outside of Omega and the Batch is not something that he’s interested in. If they wanted to convey that he found her attractive, there are routes they could have taken to ensure that that comes across correctly to the audience, such as a faint little blush or rubbing a hand through his hair. But they didn’t do that, and instead chose for him to shy away and hide from certain situations or tense up and keep his head down in others. They are conveying to us that he does not like being around her. Because every single action they made him carry out took hundreds of hours of work to execute, and they would not go through all that trouble for no reason.

Branching off of that, we reach the topic of Tech’s name. When you watch the series as a whole, you can count on one hand the number of times that Phee refers to Tech by his actual name, while she refers to the others as their actual names. This is different from Cid in the way that Cid made that intentional choice to call them different things as a way to maintain distance from them. It’s clear from both her body language and her words that she did not want to get close to them. And really, wanted nothing to do with them unless they made her money. These are intentional choices. Phee’s character is designed to be flighty and unbothered. And she wants what she wants when she wants it. The choice to call Tech names and refer to everyone else by their names is an intentional choice. Him not understanding why she does that is an intentional choice. She does not respect him, which is why she does this. She can see that he doesn’t know what to do about it, so she keeps doing it. Like when a person presses on a bruise. These are all intentional choices made by the directors.

There was also a comment that said she behaves exactly like Crosshair does. And there are a few things I think did not entirely process when they made that comment. The first being that Crosshair was written to be one of the main antagonists for the first two season. I know they appeared in Clone Wars as well, but I’m talking specifically about Bad Batch. He was designed to be a bad guy that goes through a redemption arc; just like Zuko did in ATLA, for those who enjoy it. They both started out as antagonists, had horrible things happen to them, realized along their journey that maybe they were wrong, and are able to redeem themselves in the end and side with, or in Cross’ case, return to, the protagonists. In the beginning Cross was very sharp and defensive and thought he knew what was best. But he grew over time and learned how to care for people and share his weaknesses instead of putting on a facade all the time. And that’s the difference. We are reaching the end of the series and Phee has never had character growth to the level that Crosshair has and softens and opens up to the rest of the group. She hasn’t had any character growth at all. She is still the same exact person she was when we met her. There have been characters who have appeared for significantly less time that her, and if you pay attention to them, they have had significantly more growth than her as well.

The problem that I have begun to notice with people who are so quick to defend her actions is that they seem to be focusing more on her than on anything else. When you focus on just her, I can see how someone could mistake these interactions for being positive. Because all they’re focusing on is someone who’s having fun, and of course that would translate to something positive for him. But for the people who focus on Tech, it becomes very evident that these interactions are not positive. When you watch Tech, and I mean actually pay attention to him and not just watch him, you see all the subtle signs that you would otherwise miss. Him being annoyed and uncomfortable and confused and tired and generally not enjoying being around her. And this, unfortunately, happens a lot in real life too. People don’t take the time to absorb both sides of what’s happening. And since we as humans are quicker to pick up on people who are happy as opposed to people who are not, it’s so easy to miss the signals and just assume that what you’re watching is a happy interaction and put forth no further effort into making sure that’s actually what’s happening.

There is no other way to say that these things are all intentional. They wrote, designed, and sent out something that they have spent the past few years creating. When you understand the level of work that was put into it all, there are a lot of things that become very clear. And sure, headcanons exist and people can speculate what happens between the episodes. But headcanons can only go so far before it becomes ridiculous. We cannot confirm that Echo didn’t run off to go have a quiet life with Cid, but that doesn’t automatically mean that it’s true. Inferring things that are not within the realm of possibility is not conducive. Assuming that Phee spent a lot of time talking about her adventures that she may or may not have had with the Batch between the episodes? That’s conducive and we have clear evidence that would support that. Assuming that her and Tech had a very close relationship and she always listens to what he had to say between episodes? As much as some people want it to be true, it’s just not. There is no evidence that supports that line of thinking, and, in fact, there is a vast amount of evidence that would actually conform the opposite; such as Phee talking over everyone and commanding the conversation, not respecting things that Tech says, etc.

I’m going to wrap this up by talking a bit more personally now. There are plenty of people assuming that I’m a racist or a misogynist or that my literacy skills are lacking or whatever, but because you’re upset that someone is calling out the awful behavior of someone you like doesn’t make it any less true. And that applies to both this type of situation and in real life. I know who I am and what I stand for, and you trying to tell me that I’m otherwise changes nothing. And defaulting to assumptions like that shows that either you do not watch the show with a more attentive eye, or that’s all that you see Phee for. A black woman. Both of which are issues.

People are allowed to not like black characters, even if they are black.

People are allowed to not like Asian characters, even if they are Asian.

People are allowed to not like female characters, even if they’re women (or AFAB people).

People are allowed to not like LGBTQ characters, even if they are queer.

People are allowed to not like neurodivergent characters, even if they are neurodivergent.

People are allowed to not like characters that display particular traits or thought processes, even if they share those same traits or thought processes.

People are allowed to not like characters if they think that the character is bad.

Also, for the people saying I’m using my autism as a shield clearly don’t understand how autism works? I don’t say that to be an excuse. I say that to provide context and reasoning behind the things that I say. Like many other neurodivergent people do. You all are getting pressed about the wrong things. If you want to debate the time and study I’ve put into the show because I genuinely enjoy it, then be my guest. But don’t throw out petty insults and waste everyone’s time. At least put forth some more critical thinking behind it and try to figure out why someone could be saying the things that they’re saying

#phee is a bad character #you can try to argue all you want but that doesn’t make it any less true #she’s not good for them #you can try to insult me but it’s not going to work #try using some critical thinking #I’ll wait #I know you’re going to try to argue with fact #I’m not going to sit around and let a bad person be praised for the bad things they’re doing #this is not an opinion #formal analysis #critical thinking #star wars #the bad batch #tbb #tbb season 3 #bad batch #the bad batch season 3 #tech and phee #tech x phee #the bad batch phee #phee genoa #tbb phee #tech bad batch #clone trooper tech #tbb tech #tech #technology #technically #ct 9902 #clone force 99

[zeb-z]

I just think Tallulah gets to be upset about this. “It’s not Wilbur’s fault” “He’s not a bad dad” “He loves his daughter so much” yes! These are all true! And it’s not his fault! But he’s still not there. And Tallulah has gone through so much and still hasn’t seen him, the one time he was around was the one time she wasn’t, and all she has are letters and “I’m thinking of you always” and things that used to be theirs together, but he’s still not there. She’s waited and she’s been patient and she’s loved him all the same, and he’s still not there. Like yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, from the happy milestones to the traumatic events, he’s still not there.

She knows that it’s not his fault, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s absent. That in and of itself just adds to the sorrow, because she knows why he’s gone, and she’s been told time and time again it doesn’t mean he doesn’t care, she knows this - it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting, that it doesn’t hurt, that she doesn’t yearn for her father to be there more than anything in the world, and he’s just not there.

So yes, she gets to be upset, and be caustic, and stomp her feet and write bitter messages, and be angry and vitriolic, because she’s a little girl missing her father, who feels things with her whole heart and soul - and that means she gets to feel the ugly parts of it, too.

#it’s like no wilbur isn’t at fault. especially if we’re talking about cc wilbur. but fuck man of course she’s gonna feel like this #this doesn’t make wilbur a bad person! he’s just a missing one. and Tallulah feels all the misery and bitterness as a daughter left behind #where is her father kissing her injuries and reassuring her? where is her father protecting her? hugging her at the end of the day? #Wil isn’t around to do this and she wants him back and he’s not going to be back. not for a while. and it’s not his fault but it doesn’t #stop it from being upsetting. she’s a little girl #and at least she has phil. her dad. who’s there time and time again. and it doesn’t make him somehow morally better or wtevr. he’s there an #Wil is not. and he’s going to continue to be there as a solid figure in tallulahs life that she needs #idk man like. fuck #lmao relating my own experiences from here below in the tags ✌️ #as someone who’s been in that position? a parent absent for reasons outside of control? yeah it’s sucks. and I love them and they love me #*with a parent I mean I wasn’t the parent lmao #and it will never be the same. and when they were gone and missing things I was furious at them #that resentment grows and then it fades and sometimes bitterness strikes again and it’s how it goes. love is still there #and it’s no one’s fault. it just is. and what is is messy #anyways #mcyt #qsmp #q!tallulah #q!wilbur #z speaks

[figofswords]

wow I didn’t think reblogging that tea post and then seeing people’s tags would deal me such strong psychic damage. come over I can fix you I can find a tea you will like. “I don’t like tea” how can you say that as a blanket statement when there are so many vastly different kinds of tea. head in hands

#‘it’s like coffee but not good’ #while a cup of black tea does have a great deal less caffeine in it than coffee #it also has a stimulant called l-theanine which is NOT found in coffee #and the more complex combination of the two stimulants hit your system much more slowly #which is why tea doesn’t give you jitters like coffee does #anyone who’s like wow I need my coffee to survive but I hate that it makes me nauseous and gives me heart palpitations and bad breath #to you I say. wean yourself off coffee and onto tea!!!!!!! #but WAIT I can keep going. nauseous? ginger tea. sore throat? peppermint contains menthol which works as a numbing agent #green and black teas are both very high in antioxidants #chamomile and lavender do both have a calming affect #BUT WHAT ABOUT THE TASTE I hear you say #IT TASTES LIKE GRASS. try a floral tea or a black tea or chai or Thai tea #ITS SO BITTER you’re either steeping it for too long or the water you’re using is too hot #not to sound like I’m fucking uncle iroh or something I just apparnerlt have strong thoughts and feelings about tea #I can’t handle ppl going ugh I hate tea and it’s like. overbrewed lipton in microwaved tap water. #anyway MY favorites are jasmine and lavender earl grey #and currently I’m really into this corn silk tea my brother bought me at h mart #it’s like gen mai cha but even more #congrats for making it this far into my tea rant tags. if you comment your tastes I can give you a personalized tea recommendation

[calamitydaze]

tbh “people hear about legitimate dream fuckups and it colors their worldview to exaggerate and misconstrue harm in everything he does” is just the opposite side of the coin to “fans hear about dream being legitimately fucked over and treated badly and it raises their defenses to react to every perceived slight like a personal betrayal” literally nobody is capable of being normal about that man

#bella talks #while the former is worse on twitter i think the latter is worse here #because we’re so close knit and self contained so one person getting (maybe reasonably) upset about something #can spiral into the whole dash dooming #and i’m not saying it’s never warranted— while the q hate spiraled a little out of control i think it was mostly proportional #but then we also get things like karl dropping the panel #(in fairness from what *i* saw it wasn’t as bad as how i see people acting but maybe my dash is just well curated #and i have a higher tolerance for d.tblr shenanigans than most people i think) #like i really don’t mind if people get a little rowdy LMAO it doesn’t bother me but it does make the overall environment more toxic

[itsafternoonpast5]

thinking about their friendship so hard

#camp camp #cc #David #jasper #fanart #DUDEEE nobody gets them like i do theyre so good #theyre so tragic.. they never truly got to know each other. the last time they ever seen each other they were angry with the other :( #but there’s so much regret that comes with it too. they never got to talk it out. be on good terms #they could see each other at any moment but they other doesn’t know #they call each other best friends yet we never really see them being best friends.. but maybe they get each other like no one else does #their personalities did a complete swap with each other - they understand how the other is thinking and feeling. #David hated the camp but after one good thing he loves it. viseversa with jasper #when they last saw each other they were clouded with their views and didn’t try to understand things from their lens #yet even if they didn’t - they still understood each other. if you get what I mean #theyre foils. but so is max and david and that’s what makes both relationships compelling for me. theyre so similar to each other #no wonder david is so attached to max. he sees himself in him and he sees jasper in him too #i know jaspers just a character to show how bad the camp is. but there’s so much depth to him too #he has a lot of missed potential.. i hope he’s in season 5 at least. id like to see him again #srry for the character analysis im insane #jaspvid

[thepenguisalive7]

honestly my timeline on Twitter is very clean 😆 I barely see anything, because I muted every single thing qsmp related, almost every single cc name, and anything that might be brought up by cc, and if I see anything qsmp related tweeted I just instantly mute the account (positive or not). There’s the exception of my close friends, and one or two accounts, but other than that? Nothing.

so I don’t really see any bad things on Twitter, and honestly I’m glad for it :’))

if I need updates I can just check the update account or tumblr, and my psyche can remain blissfully ignorant

#Like #I don’t need to see people arguing #regardless of what pov #even if it’s in defence of the ones I watch #it’s bad for me cause I get so heated and it ruins my day and i get toxic too 😆 which is not a good thing #This is supposed to be a hobby and I’m trying my best to make sure ut doesn’t take over my life #and poison other things #Cause at the end of the day #it’s just a minecrfat server just people on the screen that I don’t know personally

[waywardstation]

WIP FRIDAY

I apologize for getting this out two days late, I’ve been busy with lots of packing and events! But I have a little reprieve, so I wanted to post another WIP; this one is from Heart Full, Bowl Empty.

BE AWARE THAT THIS SEGMENT INVOLVES A CONVERSATION REVOLVING AROUND UNWILLING BUT INTENTIONAL STARVATION. I know there are people who say they can’t read this fic because of themes like this, so be aware of this before reading this WIP!!

I included this snippet in today’s WIP because I have like three versions of the entire segment this snippet is from. I feel like it’s a really important segment with a really important conversation, and I’ve had a hard time balancing all the emotions the way I want to between Ingo and Akari, with frustration, sadness, anger, and empathy, to realistically get them to the resolution I want at the end of it.

The final version will probably only include a few parts from this particular segment.

Enjoy!!

—————

“I knew it! You’re doing it again!” Akari’s eyebrows scrunched, trying to understand through the frustration. “You said you wouldn’t!”

“Circumstances will improve soon.” Clearly done with the conversation, that was all Ingo said, but it was confession enough that he had fallen back on his word. Shame contaminated his voice, but if there was any regret, he hid it well.

“No, it won’t!” They were not even half-way through winter yet. “And you know it won’t!”

Ingo said nothing as the kits carefully moved around his slumped form, finding comfortable places to settle around him. She didn’t know if he intended to snuff the conversation out with angered silence, or if he was just too exhausted to care about arguing with her anymore. If it wasn’t for his small occasional signs of movement or acknowledgement, she’d think he was actually sleeping.

Akari carefully stepped into the nesting layers, moving to sit down next to Ingo. She settled with her back against the cavern wall, pulling her knees close as a few kits shuffled around to accommodate her. “You know I’m right.”

Huffing out an irritated sigh and nothing more, it didn’t seem like Ingo had any intentions to engage with her argument anymore.

“You couldn’t even pull yourself up over the ridge,” She prodded at him again, trying to motivate more conversation out of him. “I had to help you!”

“There are many, many factors that go into that.” A reluctant answer, perhaps a reflexive attempt to quell her worry; Ingo feebly rubbed his wrapped hand, almost as a display for his excuse.

“I’ve seen you do more when you’ve been hurt worse.” Akari retorted, a little softer now but still cold.

Ingo’s eyes remained closed, though his hardened expression implied that it came across as more accusatory than she’d intended. But perhaps it was precisely the time to be accusatory.

“Ingo, you’re so tired all the time now – you stopped coming to the training grounds because you just can’t make the trips all the time anymore! And you’re sleeping so much more than you used to, and it’s like you’re always hungry all the time, even though all I see you doing anymore is gathering food!” Akari’s voice grew more jagged as she continued to jab at him, entirely uninterrupted.

It was getting difficult. With Ingo’s tunic still sopping by the bucket, still somewhat red from the exhausted effort of washing out the blood, it could not hide the ribs that pressed out just a little bit more, or help fill out what the waistline had lost under the loosening belt. The abject dread of directly acknowledging that was too much.

“And- and look! You aren’t even willing to hold a conversation with me anymore, and I don’t know if it’s because you just won’t, or because you can’t!” The kits shifted uncomfortably as Akari retreated back into her own frustration instead. “People think you’re sick, Ingo! They’re asking me about you! What are you doing?”

The exhausted man remained where he laid in the nesting material, only moving his hands to rub at his face and sigh — a deep, forced sigh that swelled his side before releasing. Akari almost didn’t think he’d answer her, but with some effort, he propped himself up first onto his elbows, then slumped forward. The teen watched him run shaky fingers through his hair as he sat next to her.

“…I don’t know what I should do.” The guilt. The weary guilt cracked his voice and tore Akari’s anger down to heartache.

#ref for fic #BE AWARE THIS IS DISCUSSING INTENTIONAL BUT UNWILLING STARVATION #tw starvation #just in case #cause I know not everyone vibes with this story #and I’ll say it’s been weird myself returning to these segments I wrote months ago and re-reading them #AND TO BE MORE CAREFUL I talk about a personal situation sort of dealing with this below #a lot has happened in the timeframe of originally writing this and coming back to this #at the end of fall I got very very sick and it lasted well into February #I unwillingly shed thirty-five pounds because I could not eat #and I didn’t notice at all until I stopped and realized just how tight I had to make my work belt #even when family members pointed it out during the holidays when they’d hug me #it wasn’t until someone got very concerned and did something about it that I realized just how bad it was #I’m sure people remember when I mentioned I had gastritis #that’s what all this was I just never really went into detail about how bad it truely was here #so coming back and reading this segment specifically #having written it months before I went through any of this #felt really really weird and a little uncomfortable #I edited Akari’s accusations a little to fit my situation more about a month back #because I did not realize just how much more stuff like this would make you want to sleep #at least in my experience #but it’s been very very just #strange I guess coming back to this #it doesn’t make me want to not work on HFBE anymore it just feels very weird

[randomminty]

blease gib johto e4 hcs and dynamics chart its the only thing I have I love em sm I need sparks to put immmmm fanficc bc the situation is so dire. (nothing exists in this fandom for my interests, this is one of the only bigger things that get. some attention.)

Absolutely here you go please enjoy. This is insanely self indulgent

#some of them didnt get dynamics bc 1. there was no room 2. idk </3 #will/bruno i imagine is just brains/brawl. will thinks brunos a brute. bruno doesn’t think anything bad abt will tho he thinks hes strong #koga/bruno get along. bros as well #i had to include janine/silver theyre sooo important and integral. the e4’s special little guys #i didn’t realize how insane they make me until i made this wow. something in me has been awakened #a lot of these clearly go deeper than just what i wrote. im trying to seem normal. #it sounds like i think bruno is just a friendly guy but i think as the kanto e4 he was v quiet/intimidating and only opened up w time #like. pokespe brunos personality. everyone here is v inspired by pokespe. ok im done #ask tag

[lucreziaborgiagf]

i don’t talk about bridgerton on here but just to clarify. i will not be having ANY eloise hate on this account. i will bite.

#eloise bridgerton they could never make me hate you!! #addressing the normal talking points one by one to get them sorted: #- ​no i don’t care that eloise called pen some names after the discovery. she was devastated and furious. #she can apologise in the future but in the moment of course she said it #- ​yes pen did write about eloise as a way to save her but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t possibly ruined eloise’s life #- similarly: eloise isn’t (just) angry that she was written about. daphne also went through whistledown and it very much terrified her #so have many other women including marina #- eloise is betrayed because she told pen everything and is realising pen told her nothing #(and she’s probably thinking about any secrets she might have said to her best friend that could now be used against the ton and her family) #- as claudio said: being regency gossip girl isnt a moral girlboss thing its deeply harmful tbh #- ​pen did have reasons to become whistledown! that doesn’t mean that she’s innocent or right! #- eloise isnt now friends with cressida to spite pen lmao she’s alone and scared and cressida was the last person who offered her friendship #she has no idea how to manage society by herself #(and she needs someone to improve the reputation of her and her family) #- im also convinced she has other ulterior motives for befriending cressida. like she’s keeping an eye on her or smth #- eloise didn’t just ignore anything pen said and that’s why she only just figured it out. pen deliberately didn’t speak like lw to hide it #the moment she did eloise was like huh that’s weird she doesn’t normally talk like that. and THATS when she figured it out #- eloise just found out her best friend has betrayed her and been hiding this massive secret #but she hasn’t told anyone. not even her own family. im not hearing out any accusations of HER of being disloyal #- also pen clearly wasn’t that upset at writing about eloise bc the moment eloise and colin upset her she went straight back to it lmao #side note but no i don’t think the queen is going to name her the ‘emerald’ or anything because she’s suddenly in the spotlight #eloise is tbh the only debutante she actually consistently recognised (for good or bad) #a new dress is not going to be interesting for charlotte to change her whole tradition #tl;dr i love eloise and i will die on this hill #eloise bridgerton #bridgerton

[solargeist]

I am in fact thinking of the implications and I'm choosing to interpret it as Griande having a (fake) pregnancy scandle 😞 (from her own accord or otherwise, who knows)

She took the imaginary kid in the break up

I don’t think it’s a scandal or anything, maybe a friend’s kid or something, but Mumbo misses this very important detail and almost dies of shock

The kid just like wearing a fake moustache.

#ask #if it’s in person he’d be sweating so bad #she makes a joke like he looks like me doesn’t he lol ! And then sees mumbos face like WAIT NO ITS NOT- #It turns out to be her nephew or something

[fiveminuterice]

controversial take i think but i don’t like when artists say “don’t like without reblogging” on their posts or say they’ll block people who like their art without reblogging. i say this as an artist, if you feel upset often enough by people who like without reblogging then that’s not on them that’s on you. and i say this is gently as possible. you are not owed engagement.

#this is not targeted at a specific person or post btw this is just something i’ve been seeing a lot recently #also does not account for people who like and put posts on queues #i’ve had mutuals like one of my posts and it was on queue for like two months #obviously for people who say ‘if you only like and not reblog i’ll block you’ that’s fine because you are more than welcome to curate #your own experience on here. however you kinda just sound like a dick lol #a lot of my art doesn’t get that much engagement but like. i’m not gonna tell 2/3s of the people who see my art and like it to #fuck off and reblog or else or whatever #it’d make my post a place of assumed hostility instead of something i just want to show people who may or may not enjoy it #[insert paragraph about how people still will feel bad about spending hours on something only for it to get 1:4 likes to reblog ratio] #i see this and i feel you but you start sounding like a youtuber lmao yknow? #it makes me think you view your art more like content than art

[stuckinapril]

.

#I think people treat others on here who share any sort of news like they’re actual professional journalists and we’re not #I genuinely don’t think a single person on here is #We’ve just taken it upon ourselves to share the news bc the actual journalists are the ones who mince words and have ulterior motives etc #But usually if someone on here makes a mistake it’s an honest one & they will rectify it if you notify them #You do not have to attack them or say they’re misleading on purpose like I think most ppl on here #Don’t have that sort of agenda. At least the ones who’re fighting for legitimate causes like Palestinian and Sudanese genocide etc etc #I just hope no one on here gets attacked in light of the Samara situation #I just think we should be more open to making mistakes instead of jumping to bad faith interpretations #News have to be accurate but mistakes r also ok and usually a simple communication resolves it #Tumblr is the bad faith interpretation website so I’m not surprised but I also think we need to be more graceful #Bc how else can anyone improve / learn more etc etc #Whenever someone on here shares an opposing opinion it’s not that I dislike that or want to intentionally suppress it #It’s usually just framed in a very inflammatory way that doesn’t even give me the opportunity to give my side and might motivate other ppl #To think I’m basically like a normal journalist who intentionally misleads 💀💀 I am An Iraqi Girl Who Is Trying To Help #At least this has taught me how to gracefully own up to mistakes and take accountability etc that’s pretty cool #Bc even w all that said I think it’s important to hold urself accountable if u do make a mistake regardless of intention. #We just shouldn’t demonize making mistakes bc how can someone grow Ok I’m done

[quietwingsinthesky]

Dean is such a paradox for me because on the one hand, I have been actively triggered by him in the show, there are moments where, intentionally or not, the writers managed to create a portrayal of manipulation and abuse and control issues that it sets off actual alarms for me. And on the other hand, I would not have him any other way. There is something — not comforting, that’s too soft a word — about knowing where Dean’s actions stem from, having seen and learned all that we do about his childhood neglect and parentification and the trauma he goes through repeatedly in the show, and that he doesn’t come out clean. He comes out a goddamn mess who ends up hurting the people around him in reaction to his own pain!

There’s a reality there that’s. Almost nice, actually. Distressing to watch, but it is a fucking mess, it’s a good mess! He’s got zero healthy coping skills and a healthy relationship with say, his brother, is terrifying because it leaves him open to abandonment!

I’m not sure I’m wording this correctly. There is a way to be a good abuse victim. Take the pain, martyr yourself on it, and then, even if you have no support or idea how to, then you have to become a Good Person who never hurts anyone the way you have been learning to your entire life. Simply toss everything that shaped you out the door and emerge a saint with a tragic backstory. And Dean is not that. And that’s so fucking good. Everything that he has gone through continues to effect the way he treats the people around him, and he can’t fight the behaviors he might recognize as harmful because he also sees them as protecting him (or protecting Sam by keeping Sam with him.)

And sometimes, idk. It feels good to see a guy who didn’t heal the “right way.” Who mostly didn’t heal at all, just keeps the wound open because it’s easier that way.

#there’s a whole other bit to this about how like. it’s hard for fandom to hold the idea that someone can be both a victim and abusive #at the same time. that the ways someone has been hurt don’t always shape them into kindness and wide-eyed sympathy. occasionally it just #makes them hard to live with. and I think most obviously is the thing that a lot of what Dean does is an expression of love. of protection. #he’s very much his father’s son in that way. that’s why Sam. the guy he’s been Told to protect his whole life. is also the person he ends up #hurting the most. it’s tragedy. it’s realistic. it’s a good fucking mess. #and that’s why I don’t get interpretations of dean that are determined to shave off the ugly parts of his character. to me those are the #parts that make him a character worth revisiting. he’s so full of love. and he uses it to hurt people. he means to sometimes. a lot of the #time he doesn’t but hurts them anyway. he has been shaped by violence his whole life. and it’s just. I get why someone might take this #part of him away. to make him easier to love. because I get that he’s stressful to watch also like I get that. but he is. #he is compelling. in his anger and his controlling behavior and his strangling love. he is compelling in all the ways he has become this. #Dean’s degradation into these behaviors can be both a failure of a show that ran to long but also the believable trajectory of a man who #can’t heal. and I love him for that. I love him for emerging from pain as a angry sharp thing. I love that it brings the glimpses of him #being gentler and recognizing his actions as bad into stark relief. I love that this recognition often only lasts until he is hurt again and #then he backpedals into the safety of behaviors he knows will allow him to control a situation through force or manipulation. #it’s good fucking mess. you know? dean winchester everybody. #maybe I should have put all that in the main post. oh well. too late now. #spn #dean winchester #tw abuse

[artschoolglasses]

If you use mods in video games that make characters look younger, remove wrinkles, smooth out skin, make them thinner… etc, etc…I hate you. 🙃

#I’ve hated the mods I’ve seen for odyssey and valhalla with a passion #I’m hating the ones I’m seeing for baldur’s gate just as much #people who wanna remove karlach’s scars and make her smaller? #people who need astarion to be more sexually attractive oh my god did you even pay attention during his cut scenes? #and this doesn’t even get into that one person whO MODDED WYLL INTO A WHITE MAN #make jaheira younger #give lae'zel a babydoll face #you people disgust me #you don't deserve to be in the company of other human beings ever #no friends no romantic partners nothing #can't even handle fictional people who don't look like lifeless over-airbrushed ai renders #how do you even manage in the real world looking at real people with GASP imperfections? #(not to mention the people who think these mods look better have just objectively bad taste I mean they're absolutely hideous and tacky...) #(you think jaheira should look like a kardashian? I spit on you) #artschoolrambles

[struungout]

doll maker: *creates a doll barely thicker than their other skinny/thin dolls* i’m making a chubby body. :)

me:

#i’m confiscating the word ‘chubby’ from doll people until y’all learn to use it correctly #don’t make me put ‘thicc’ and ‘curvy’ away too #youpladolls describing a muscular-ass doll body as ‘a bit more chubby’ jfdkalfjalk lmao #is the chubby doll body in the room with us? #the body doesn’t even look bad or anything but girl! that isn’t chubby #gonna be forever laughing about the popovy venus body too #painting!venus isn’t even close to being chubby and they still made a runway model skinny body #personal bloggity #i know we all got brainworms about this stuff in the doll hobby #but it’s getting ridiculous lmao