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#especially when stede isn't looking
captain-flint · 2 years
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Ed + lingering gaze
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iggy-hands · 2 years
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I still can't believe ofmd is a show set in the 18th century, and they Went to a party of aristocrat's together, And we STILL didn't get to see them dance together
They did all that prep about which fork to use but no - "okay! I'll quickly show you some very basic dances just in case!"
they denied us awkward clammy hand holding, stiff jilted movements, stepping on toes, not yet familiar with each others patterns, the spinning and spinning and the thrill of finally getting it right, bodies moving as one, faces inches apart hot breath intermingling, lingering eye contact, dizzy from the spinning and perhaps something more, holding each other that second longer than needed not wanting to be the first to let go, not wanting to be the first to break the illusion because they are, in that moment, the only two people in the entire universe, distant canon fire suddenly requiring attention, a final awkward laugh and a bashful glance upward, both secretly wanting more, both hoping for a next time
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izzy-b-hands · 1 year
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I was thinking abt the occasionally fun but mostly frustrating tradition(in the states at least idk for sure if anywhere else does this?)of valentine's day boxes made for school.
That led me here. steddyhands and the dilemma of the valentines day box assignment for louis and alma, special feature on izzy and his rising blood pressure (sorry izzy bby akdnfjgn), which I'll be real i talk more abt in my tags on this since this probably isn't gonna be written out any further, so yeah. More plot talky izzy stuff in my tags.
Noting this in my tags too, but a moment to specify that ed and stede aren't trying to have like. a shitty parenting moment in this, they're just human and excited abt the situation and sorta fuck up a bit.
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"The point is that they make the box themselves," Izzy says, for what feels like the hundredth time. "The only grade they get is 'did they do it or not'. Their teachers bolded that part of the email, remember? Said to mind getting too competitive about it?"
"Now I think Frenchie would happily take on the commission," Stede continues, thumbs tapping at his phone keyboard. "He'll reply quickly; he always does for me."
"It's a cardboard box," Izzy says. "To hold paper and cardboard valentines and cheap candy. That's it!"
"Money will help, but the overall design needs to be good," Ed says to Stede, as if Izzy and the kids aren't still standing there. "Money can buy resources, but it can't buy pretty, no matter how nice those resources might be."
"Oh that's good! Applies to other things too, I like it!"
"We bought them new shoes last week," Izzy sighs. Why does he keep trying? He couldn't say. "They each have a box already. We just need to help them decorate the boxes. That's it. That is all the teacher means with this project. I even asked Mary and Doug how they read it, and they agreed with me!"
"Ooh Frenchie has mock ups!" Stede cheers softly. "I knew he'd come through."
"It's okay," Alma pats Izzy's hand. "You tried really hard to make them understand. They're just excited."
"Can we go to the art stuff store now?" Louis whines, tugging at Izzy's other hand. "They won't even notice if we leave!"
"We should leave a note at least," Izzy says.
"Dad does love well written notes and random acts of abandonment," Alma sighs. "You dictate and I'll write. I want to practice my cursive."
"Really?"
"Dad can't read my cursive well yet."
"That makes more sense," Izzy says. "Louis, what are you-"
He watches as Louis tugs Stede's wallet from the countertop, and bolts outside, prize held up over his head with both hands.
"He won't notice," Alma reassures him. "You shouldn't have to pay for our stuff for this anyway."
"You've done this before."
"We'd be stupid if we hadn't," Alma tears a page from her notebook. "Here, I wrote it myself. I'm gonna get Louis in the car."
She's out the door after Louis, hands clapping to get his attention just like Mary did with them both.
"Either of you want to help me address that?" Izzy asks Ed and Stede, who he realises have indeed not stopped talking to each other the entire time. "She's a bit young to be acting like that, yeah?"
They're in their own world. Normally, he wouldn't care, but he's Guardian Five out of many and it feels like Parent/Guardians 1-4 could and should have already noticed it ahead of him.
"Fine," Izzy drops Alma's note by Stede's hand, deciding not to read it. That she actually went through with writing it is kindness enough. "I'm going to let her rack up a ridiculous bill on one of your seven credit cards, and they'll make those stupid fucking valentine boxes so fucking ornate..."
His anger fizzes out mid-sentence. Stede isn't listening. Ed isn't listening. Alma keeps honking the horn in the car and how did she get the fucking keys?!
"You know what? Fast food and ice cream for dinner too," Izzy adds. "On your dime. We'll bring you something back."
He turns his attention to Alma and the frank abuse of the car's horn. "Alma! The neighbours already don't like us, let's not make it worse! Not unless you've got something worse than this planned for later-"
--
The door thunks shut.
"Oh," Stede looks over to it. "Didn't Izzy just say something?"
"No idea," Ed replies, looking through design ideas on his phone. "Why?"
"They were just here," Stede continues. "Him and the kids. Right?"
"Maybe they went out for an after school snack," Ed shrugs. "To get inspired for this big art box project thing."
"Is that what this is? What was this for again?"
"Dunno for sure, but look at this," Ed turns the phone to show Stede the screen. "For Louis?"
Stede lets his concerns drop again. Izzy will mention if they're missing any key details about the kids' projects and what needs to be done. "I think he'd love it! Save that."
The house is getting dark around them, and he wonders if Izzy and the kids will be home for dinner.
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forpiratereasons · 7 months
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ok so here's the thing about izzy imo. narratively speaking, izzy's adoption into the crew in eps four and five is more about the crew than it is about izzy.
the crew is at each other's throats, suspicious, angry, ready to snap. conflicted. they only come together and work through their trauma by coming together and doing a craft project to help someone who clearly needs some help. it's not that izzy especially earned their acceptance or their adoption or their forgiveness. it's that the crew chose all these things regardless. that's healing for the crew. they saw someone hurting, who needed help, and they helped him. offered community. offered stability. they could still do that together.
even stede does this imo. the whole "training montage" thing, when you really look at is, is like, pretty limited? izzy tries to teach stede two things and stede is not at all shown to improve at either. i would eat my shoe if ed actually said izzy taught him everything he knows. frankly i'd eat my shoe if ed had actually said anything to or about izzy since izzy shot him. but izzy is only happy (...in his own way) when he feels needed, or useful. stede knows that he and izzy aren't in a place to have a conversation that would end in a helpful place. instead stede lets izzy feel needed and useful, puts him in a position where he can prove to himself that he's still worth something.
why?? why bother?
because they recognize that izzy's suffering. because they recognize izzy devolving into his own kraken era. because they've learned something about people in crisis through ed's experiences, and they're trying to do something to help. because they're the kind of people who help. because they're embracing stede's culture of kindness. because it heals something in them to do it.
sometimes, and i don't mean all the time, god knows, but sometimes. life will give you people who need to be forgiven even though they haven't earned it, maybe even when they aren't sorry, because you need to do that for your own self. sometimes you need to do it to heal, or for closure, or to cut off the last thing tying you to an ordeal. sometimes you need to do it to prove there's still something inside you that's capable of it. that you are still capable of goodness or kindness or even just fucking. moving on. this isn't true for every case, not for every person or every truth, but sometimes. and izzy is that sometime.
notably, this does not extend, thus far, to ed. ed and izzy have not spoken since izzy shot him. i guess i would be surprised if ed and izzy didn't eventually have A Conversation About Alla That, but at the start of ep 4, neither ed nor izzy were in a position to have that conversation. ed needs to do his healing with stede. izzy needs to learn how to exist as a separate and distinct entity from ed and from blackbeard. izzy could never have gotten there without being shown that he can be that by the crew; his arc is not, for lack of a better term, self-powered. they show him how it can be and he allows himself to be brought into change. then ed and izzy can heal what they need to heal. to stop hurting each other.
the narrative is just setting the two of them up to get there.
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Another thing I just adore about Ed and Stede's dynamic is Ed certainly does not NEED anyone to protect him. He's a very competent person who is extremely successful and has a reputation built on being brilliant and a tactical genius. It would be so, so easy for Stede's desire to help and protect Ed to come across as condescending at best and racist at worst.
But it doesn't, because Stede isn't perfomative about it. He doesn't walk around acting like Ed is helpless or stupid. He just responds, earnestly and genuinely, when he sees Ed is in distress.
Take the party in s1e5 for example. Ed is visibly very upset, and even though Stede stops him from going back in there, we know that Ed could probably easily find a way to terrify the people who were so cruel to him. He's only got one single-shot gun, sure, but we know Ed's smart enough he could figure this out. But Stede tells Ed that he'll deal with it, and he embarasses them, gets them to light their ship on fire, and Ed looks at him like he just hung the fucking stars in the sky.
Has anyone ever stood up for Ed like this before? Ever? Is it any wonder we first see Ed thinking about kissing Stede right after this?
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And then Ned Low is the other obvious example. Other people have rightly pointed out that the moment Ned died was when he was playing with Ed's hair, mocking him, and we see Stede's furious face. Ned just signed his own death certificate, he just didn't know it yet, because Stede was never going to let him leave his ship alive after that. They go out of their way this episode to show us how Ned is insulting, mocking, and racist towards Ed to make sure we know exactly why Stede was never going to let him live.
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And, yes, Ed did tell Stede that he shouldn't kill Ned, trying to protect Stede. But Ed isn't surprised when Stede does it - at worst, he feels bad that Stede thought the "poison" of killing someone was worth it because of Ed. I think Ed knew, at least on some level, especially after what happened to those rich racist dickheads - he can count on Stede making people who are awful to him pay for it.
I love that Stede will take people insulting him without blinking an eye all day, but the second they're mean to Ed it's fucking on sight. No one insults his princess and gets away with it. And I'm sure Ed feels bad that Stede does these things for him, but I hope he's starting to realize that he deserves to be cared for the way Stede looks out for him. These two want to protect each other so bad.
In conclusion, I guess: if you're staying at their inn and you say a single mean thing to Ed, you better start fuckin' running
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celluloidbroomcloset · 5 months
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To talk a bit more about submission and especially Ed's trust in Stede and the erosion of that trust...
There's a fairly clear implication that Ed has never felt safe in his life - not as a child with an abusive father, not as a boy or young man on Hornigold's ship, and not as Blackbeard. He's very much the impossible bird, increasingly exhausted and sick of flying until eventually he'll just drop out of the sky. But when he meets Stede, he thinks he's found a safe place to land.
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His desire to relinquish control is right there from the very beginning, though he may not even know it. He's tired, he's bored, he's not having fun being a pirate or even being a person.
He tries to show some vulnerability with Izzy, only to be first misunderstood, then bullied back into Blackbeard. But it’s revealing so much of himself to Stede, and then being hurt, that drives his heartbreak and eventually his depression. Ed trusted Stede with his darkest secrets, but also with his softest feelings - the murder of his father and his mother's silk.
What’s harsh in Stede not showing up on the dock is that he said he was Ed’s friend, and then Ed kisses him and their relationship shifts. The kiss is a declaration of desire; it's moving from the relationship they can still treat as friendship and into the space of romance and sexuality. Stede not showing up on the dock seems to say, “I was your friend but I can’t be your lover.”
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Ed starts seeing those moments of tenderness and kindness throughout the first season in a different light. He felt how tenderly his vulnerability and his fears were treated, and now he wonders if he never understood the meaning behind that tenderness - that Stede really did fear him, or was just being kind, because Stede is kind.
That rejection isn't what makes Ed spiral, but it is what he dwells on throughout those first three episode of Season 2. Stede broke something open inside him, and he thinks that what he felt was never really reciprocated, that Stede was frightened of him and that Stede saw him fully and what he saw was a monster. So when Stede comes back and offers that gentleness again, Ed's naturally wary of it. He wants, badly, to give in and let himself be vulnerable again, but he's scared that he will be hurt if he does.
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I've said it before and I'll say it again - the fact that Stede stops saying "I love you" when Ed asks him to, and that he slows down when Ed asks him to, and that he asks to hold Ed's hand is important. Stede is nothing if not emotionally attuned to Ed. He's saying "you're safe with me." He's not going to do or try to do anything that Ed doesn't want, and he's not going to get pissy about it.
A lot has been said about Calypso's birthday, because it is certainly the most vulnerable Ed has ever been, likely with anyone. When he's sitting on the bed and looking at Stede, you can see that in him - it's a moment where he's finally willing to trust Stede again, and let him take control, and trust that Stede won't hurt him.
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That look is of such exceptional vulnerability, not just because they’re going to have sex but because of what that means as an expression of the love and trust that Ed is willing to give. He’s really letting Stede see all the softest parts of him, even allowing Stede to have control over them, and he’s got to be certain that this very gentle man isn’t going to use that to break him.
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amuseoffyre · 6 months
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Things worth remembering:
All Stede knows about Ed's breakdown is that it was because of him (You broke him/he took my leg cos I mentioned your name), He doesn't know about Ed's other trauma aside from his dad and while he knows Ed is disillusioned with pirating, he doesn't know the specifics about why.
Ed tends to speak in metaphors and while Stede tries to understand them, it's clear that sometimes he's missing the mark. Sometimes Ed isn't even sure of the metaphors himself, but once he has them, he holds onto them - the fish thing has got him especially.
And the thing is that Ed's only just learned to sit with himself in episode 5 and it's overwhelming him. At the beginning of 6, he's the stillest and quietest we've seen him and is gazing out to sea while having flashbacks to things he's done and people he's hurt (hello 1x09 callback).
And the thing is he's okay at the start of 7. He's made a decision about shedding the Blackbeard stuff. He doesn't say anything to anyone and he's ok until Jackie points out Stede is the rising star just when Ed wants out
He doesn't begrudge Stede being excited and happy with his new fame. He is afraid of what his presence has led Stede to: the conversation with Jackie is very much his "you defile beautiful things" moment, especially his presence brought Ned to Stede ("It's me you want").
He also doesn't understand why Stede killed Ned because Stede bottled up his trauma like his love letters. He doesn't even know why Stede a) became a pirate or b) went back to Mary, especially since Stede never actually told him where he'd been directly. He had to hear it from Anne - and Stede is betrayed by that as well ("I told you that in confidence")
Right now, he's feeling unmoored by his own identity and now Stede has taken a step that has fully changed him as a person too and dragged him straight back into the heart of piracy. He tells Jackie he wants out and she asks if Stede knows that and Ed's face just drops and he whispers "shit".
And he spends of the rest of the day thinking and quiet and realises that to process any of this mess, he needs to be away from the pirate world for a bit so he can get his head on straight because now it's roaring back in for him. He sits, he thinks, he realises he needs that space - he should speak to Stede but he tried that the day before and Stede still killed Ned.
Stede also lashes out, which definitely doesn't help. He's right. Ed is panicking, but Stede is also missing so many little clues. Ed never told him about dropping his leathers and Stede just sees him as Ed in other clothes. He doesn't understand the significance, even when everyone around them realises something is off. If even the Swede picks up on it, you know it's an obvious flag.
They both need to use their words and explain wtf is happening with both of them, but they are also both ridiculously traumatised by their past experience. Ed is afraid he's unlovable and now Stede is talking down his coping mechanism, so maybe he's right and Ed-as-Ed is unlovable, while Stede has been told his entire life he isn't enough, so becoming the ultimate pirate should be the win he's been looking for, only Ed isn't happy and Ed is leaving him, so maybe it's him that isn't enough after all.
They are both tangled up so much in their own histories and don't know enough about each others and that's why they keep lashing out and hurting each other so much - they each don't realise what they're saying is a different kind of weapon to the other.
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teeny-tiny-revenge · 29 days
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Came across this in a fic again and I have to vent for a moment here: Ed's hair isn't unclean or not taken care of. Ever. Even at his lowest, in the first two episodes of season two, his hair is light and blows with the wind, it's got perfect waves, there is zero grime in it. Impossible Birds Ed hair has clearly been fairly recently washed, combed out and conditioned. Ed canonically loves soap, and you don't get that hair without owning a comb or brush and frequently working oil into it. He's at sea! The air is salty! It'll dry out your hair, but Ed's hair doesn't ever look dried out. The day he decides to commit suicide he puts his hair up into a lovely bun, with whispy stands framing his face. I have no idea what some people are watching, because Ed taking meticulous care (and most likely also putting pride and love) into his hair is clear, on-screen canon.
Like, if you want to write about how he was neglecting himself in his depression Kraken era? There's plenty there for you on screen as well! He sobs all night, probably sleeps on the floor if he sleeps at all. He doesn't wear his knee brace. He drinks and does drugs (and admits to that being poison to Frenchie!). He's pushing everyone away, he's pushing himself hard into a role that made him passively suicidal even before the breakup depression. He doesn't watch his back during raids At All. There's so much self harm there to address. If you want to, it would probably be plausible to add him not bothering to properly care for any wounds he might obtain during a raid. But he clearly doesn't neglect bathing and hair care. They're probably the only elements of self-care he actually still does during this dark time!
Even rock bottom Ed doesn't neglect his hair. And that says things about him! It's also something I'd love to see actually addressed in fic (will probably write it myself one of these days...): Taking good care of his hair, putting on jewelry, doing his makeup, these are things that seem to bring Ed joy or relief in his darkest moments. Where's my fic about these quiet moments of self-care being a straw he clutches to when everything else is terrible?
I love a good bathing together/doing each other's hair fic. It's intimate and loving! And Stede and Ed are prime material to write a mutual caretaking and bonding over it couple! Ed canonically loves soap and taking care of his hair! And Stede brought an entire fucking bathtub on a ship, the wonderful madman. S1 Stede's hair is always carefully curled, and we know that's not its natural state (it's wavy but not in this manner) from seeing him in S2, away from his certainly plentiful bath and grooming equipment. Stede probably has an hour of daily hair routine! We know he has nice smelling, probably expensive soaps. Where's the fic where they share in this?
There's so much potential! They can show each other their favourite care products! Sometimes they'll work on each other and sometimes not at all! Ed's rich hair oils will make Stede's hair all sticky and weird! Ed will think it's hilarious and adorable, he'll try to ruffle his hair and make it stick up worse and Stede will pout! 🥺 He'll look like this, just with weird spiky hair! One ill-advised day they try putting Stede's curlers in Ed's hair and then they almost can't get them back out because Ed's hair is so long and has lots of natural wave and it'll cling to the curlers and it's awful (they laugh about it afterwards, once Ed has very carefully brushed his hair out again and it no longer pulls at his scalp).
Makeup was a thing done by men and women at the time, especially for aristocrats (as seen in Episode 5), so Stede will know his way around hoity toity makeup, meaning rouges and whites (contained lots of lead, yuck!). Meanwhile Ed does pirate costume makeup for Blackbeard endeavours, that's a whole different thing. And both of these are makeups they don't actually enjoy doing (Stede avoids heavy makeup for the party, and Ed's Kraken makeup is part of his whole Everything Is Awful And I'm Making Myself Feel That look). But we see Ed do nice makeup that seems to be him! On his supposed to be final day on Earth, he cleans away all the Kraken coal, he cleans up his cabin, he gets rid of drugs, booze, Izzy (everything that was harming him), he does up his hair really nice and in a style that's very much Not Blackbeard, and he puts on a gorgeous bit of eyeliner that really brings out his eyes. And now that they're safe and happy together, when Ed decides he wants to look pretty today, not only can Stede lose his marbles over the look, Ed can also show him how to make his own eyes pop like that. They can stand in front of their mirror together, giggling and trying not to poke anyone in the eye.
Like. This is a fancy bathroom items for fancy bathroom items couple. They will bond over their love of bubble baths and nice smelling soaps and soft oils for hair and skin! They will learn each other's routines and how to do them just right for them. Let Stede learn that Ed loves his baths scalding hot (Stede has to wait a while for it to cool before he joins him in the tub because he'll get all pink and lightheaded). Let Ed learn how to put in Stede's curlers for him if Stede wants his hair to look extra fluffy the next day. Let Ed learn to massage Stede's back and Stede learn to massage Ed's knee. There's so much potential for loving caretaking with this ship. The trope doesn't at all require Ed to not know or not want to take care of his hair and hygiene. Fuck's sake.
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avelera · 7 months
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OFMD S2 Meta - Stede's Garbage Self-Worth with regards to Ed is still unresolved
(And I'm so hyped for this plotline)
H'ok! So of all the scenes in episodes 1-3 of OFMD S2, this is the one I've been most hyped to discuss but I've been putting it off a few days so people had at least a little time to watch the new eps.
Gifs are courtesy of @ratchet from this gifset:
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Hoooo BOY this is such an interesting scene to unpack! Because to me there's at least 3 levels going on here.
What Lucius hears
What the audience "hears"
What Stede literally said
Thing is, I believe when Stede says, "I'm not ready to believe that," the tone that Lucius hears and that the audience is at least 50/50 expected to hear based on the sort of cadence of the scene is, "I'm not ready to believe that Ed's best days are behind him. I'm going to change that."
But I'm not convinced that's what Stede is saying, what Rhys Darby is portraying, or what is literally on the page.
Literally, on the page, Stede says he's not ready to believe that. And given that Stede is very neurodivergent coded, Rhys is self-confessed autistic, and I believe Rhys is bringing that to his portrayal of Stede, I think we really should look at literal words as written and not just run with they're implied to say. This could be read as a declaration that Stede refuses to accept a reality where Ed's best days are behind him or the literal reading: he still can't process that Ed Teach's time with Stede Bonnet was the best Ed's life is ever going to get.
I believe this is for multiple reasons:
Stede isn't going to throw off a lifetime of low self-esteem and bullying overnight just because he's realized he's in love. Especially when the manner of realizing it (end of S1) was hurting the person he loves pretty badly by abandoning him without a word. He's determined to fix his mistakes but each step of the journey is revealing just how big of a mistake it actually was. Not exactly the stuff of sudden self-confidence and positive self-image change.
It requires a full re-write in Stede's brain of every single assumption he had about his relationship with Ed before their separation. Stede in S1, to my eyes, very much saw himself as the junior partner in the relationship. He saw Ed as taking pity on him, to some extent. He felt blessed to have Ed there. It informed so much of their relationship and it especially informed him taking off when he thought his presence was an active burden on Ed. Basically, what Lucius is saying here attacks the very foundations of Stede's understanding of the happiest part of his life so far. To learn that Ed wasn't just the happiest part of his life, but that he, Stede Bonnet, was the happiest part of Ed's life? Whew. Fuck. Not good. Very not good.
Because it's really not good if he was the happiest part of Ed's life, that he so fundamentally misunderstood their dynamic because of his low self-esteem, that he ended the happiest period of Ed's life without warning, without a note, prematurely, and left Ed with the inescapable conclusion that Stede doesn't care about him.
I think worse, even worse, is that Stede has evidence that Lucius is right that he was the best part of Ed's life. But in S1, we're heavily in Stede's POV and Stede's POV of himself is that he's a joke, pathetic, garbage, lucky to have someone like Ed in his life. But Ed's literal actions, louder than words, are that he chose Stede. He gave up piracy for him. He stayed by him. He offered his life for Stede's. Stede wasn't ready to hear that then, he couldn't hear it over the sound of his own low self-esteem whispering poison in his ear, externalized by the Badmintons (both real and imagined). He took their words as fact, rather than Ed's actions as fact. Reexamining Ed's actions shows just how wrong they were. Just how wrong Stede was. And just how badly he hurt Ed because he didn't listen to Ed, the person he loves, over the voices of his own trauma, self-doubt, or of the Badmintons, people who literally hated Stede.
It's a lot. It's a lot for Stede to take in. He's not there yet. But I love that we've had it said aloud: this is a major plot point still. Stede's end-of-S1 glow-up didn't signal that he's self-confident now enough to realize he might be as good for Ed as Ed is for him. He's still grappling with that. It shatters him to even begin to realize this. They have to work through that still. Stede is ready to start listening but he still doesn't, can't literally can't, believe it just yet. It's just too big.
And I am absolutely salivating to see how the rest of the season deals with this thread.
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portraitofadyke · 18 days
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what's been bugging me is how some people, especially steddyhands shippers, seem to ignore Stede's complete blind spot that is Ed. I've been rereading some post s1 fix-its, and it's amazing how almost every one of their reunions had Stede blaming Ed for marooning the crew and attempting to kill Lucius (same with ppl's expectation that there would be some sort of physical fight). And then he just. Doesn't.
Stede obviously cares for the crew. A lot. But the moment Ed's well being is in the picture, he becomes hyperfocused on Ed and Ed only. Obviously the crew told him about being marooned, but we don't see him mention that once in his letters. They reunite with Lucius, and yet all Stede talks about is Ed (and his poor portrayal on his wanted posters)- Lucius confesses about Ed throwing him overboard, and all Stede does is question 'why?', because he knows Ed wouldn't just randomly attempt to murder Lucius. The moment Lucius tells him Stede broke Ed, Stede is back to blaming himself, never Ed. He clearly cares about Lucius, because later in the ep, he tries to reconcile with him by giving him 'dating advice' and trying to save him from what happened to him and Ed, but Ed comes first.
We actually see it in s1 too, if only briefly, in s7 when Stede desperately tries to keep Ed abroad and becomes oblivious to the crew's concerns and problems and we get the iconic line "Eat and apple, for God's sake!" Stede cares, but Ed is at the front of his mind and it's hard for him to understand what could be more important.
In s02e03, he gets his ship and the rest of his crew back, but Ed is nowhere. Izzy is literally missing a leg and Stede just tells him to piss off.
And I've seen people questioning why Stede never questioned that, why he never bothered to ask about Izzy's missing toe or back scars or why he didn't care about the leg more. Izzy clearly lies again and tells Stede Ed shot it off because he told Ed he loves him, and yet stede just. Doesn't care.
And i mean, that question is valid. Because people see Stede as someone who's much more caring, more hero-coded. But Stede is far more a romantic hero to Ed than he is your general hero to the rest of the characters. Stede is selfish. Stede is blind-sided. Stede is willing to abandon his morals when it comes to Ed.
I think there are two reasons Stede doesn't question Izzy's Ed-inflicted-injuries, or any other, for that matter. First one is, Stede's blind spot for Ed. Yeah, Izzy got his leg shot off by Ed (not entirely true, but I digress), but there must have been a reason why. Yeah, Izzy got his toes cut off and hand-fed, but Ed had a reason. Stede knows Ed is not violent by default, so he knows something must have prompted him to do that. Is it completely justified? That's a differenr convo about people trying to portray Izzy as a victim rather than someone who kept pushing Ed over the edge until they were both too far.
The second is... Yeah, Stede just doesn't care. Especially about Izzy. Lie it's been pointed out, Stede just thinks izzy is a dick. He misnames him. He's rightuflly mad at him for selling them out to the english. He literally dreams about killing Izzy for that. Stede blames himself for abandoning Ed and everything that happened after (and yes, Ed's actions are Ed's actions, but that's how Stede sees it), but he clearly also blames Izzy for setting them up.
So, Stede sees Izzy's missing leg? Probably deserved that. Back scars, missing toe? Eh, probably deserved that, too, Ed would look absolutely lovely in a braid. Is that morally correct? No, but Stede isn't written to be a moral character. That's what makes him so real, and that's why so many other actors than Rhys would struggle making Stede sympathetic and likeable to the audiences.
That's not to say Stede doesn't see Ed's wrongs. He absolutely does. He just. Doesn't care that much in the end, because his love for all of Ed is that bright, to the point of being absolutely, utterly selfish. DJenkins said it from the beginning; this show is about Ed and Stede's relationship. Stede doesn't question Izzy's injuries bc in the end, it just doesn't matter to him when Ed is in the picture
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fairfowl · 6 months
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As promised! Izzy-centric fic recs!
These are all gonna be pre S2 (and all Steddyhands because I was obsessed for like a year)
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@crabgrave
Starting off strong with
1) Battle of the Boyfriends
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This fic makes you laugh before it makes you cry. A steddyhands centric dramady mostly from Izzy's point of view, and I love this Izzy very much.
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Isn't he precious? They absolutely hurt his feelings
2) Doldrums
This one is a two part series that starts with Izzy leaving the Revenge as Stede and Ed reunite post S1. He recruits Calico Jack and becomes captain of his own ship while he and Jack have a lot of sex (I actually enjoy Jack in this one lol) Ed and Izzy eventually partially work things out
The second part involves Izzy back on the ship in the beginning stages of steddyhands
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I think the real strength of this series is Izzy's interactions with everyone, but especially Stede and Oluwande
3) The Nook is for Talking Shit
This is a Calico Jack hate!fic and I'm here for it. Also steddyhands because I've got a problem
In this fic Stede and Izzy bond offer a mutual enemy, and Izzy teaches Stede how to craft the perfect insult
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I like that they laugh together, and I really like it when Stede stands up for Izzy ♡ (I also like that Izzy has a very good reason to hate Jack that involves him having been injured very badly)
4) Navigating By the Light of Your Stars
A delicious sandwich of a trilogy where the bread is BlackHands and Stizzy relationship studies, and the meat is steddyhands smut.
Featuring: GrayAce!Izzy, whump, Stede’s introduction to BDSM, and discussions of mortality ♡
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5) A Pirate Triptych
Another steddyhands trilogy!
This is one I've seen on many recommendation lists and it is worth it. These men and their guilt I swear ♡
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Post S1 Izzy schemes to get Stede back into Ed's good graces at his own expense.
If you like Izzy whump this is the fic for you
6) More Vivid than Sunsets, Brighter than Stars
On a shorter and sweeter note this little steddyhands bdsm fic explores Izzy running his mouth and Stede and Ed going a little too far in order to punish him. Everyone gets their feelings hurt ♡
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Everyone is characterized well here but Ed is kind of the star of the show, he has to mediate this incident and he's hilarious
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7) House of Mirrors
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This one is pure Izzy whump with steddyhands caretaking. Izzy is sick, Ed spirals, Stede is Exhausted (tm)
I reread this one often
anyway I think this is what I have for now, I might post another list at some point because there are a couple of longfics that are very near and dear to my heart, plus S2 is not gonna stop me from reading new fic. I look forward to seeing more amputee!Izzy
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tizzyizzy · 7 months
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Izzy's Feelings Matter Too
As a fandom, I find that Ed's feelings are often front and center. How hurt he was when Stede apparently abandoned him. Whether he was healing or not healing in s1e10. How hurtful or triggering or frightening Izzy's threat to him was, and to what extent it motivated Ed to destroy himself and everyone around him.
But what about how Ed's behaviors hurt others' feelings? Like Izzy's? Especially in s1e9 and s1e10?
From season 2 episodes and promos, we now know:
Ed and Izzy loved each other.
Ed and Izzy have been together most of their lives, and they know one another like no one else does.
Izzy taught Ed everything he knows.
Keeping that in mind, let's look back at the Act of Grace scene.
This isn't just Ed sacrificing his old way of life for a new love. Ed is severing his longest lasting, intimate relationship with Izzy for a future with Stede.
So for Izzy, this is his closest, most beloved friend ending their relationship to be with someone new. Someone Izzy said would ruin him.
Then Stede disappears, and Ed comes crawling back.
The man Izzy loved most left him for another man, and after Ed's heart broke, Ed walked back into Izzy's life like he belonged there.
Ed needed time to heal from the heartbreak? Well, I'm sure Izzy would have appreciated a bit of time to himself. Maybe a show of appreciation or apology. Literally any attempt at all to make up for the fact that Ed had picked someone over him (who ran off).
Instead, while Ed is crying in his blanket fort, it's Izzy who has to handle the crew. A crew he is clearly struggling to manage.
Then, without warning, Ed radically changes his leadership approach, if he's even consciously making a decision about how to lead at all. He proposes that they stop being pirates.
Remember, we are now aware that Izzy has known Ed ages. Izzy has been Ed's first mate for a long, long time. Izzy's career and livelihood are deeply intertwined with Ed's.
People tend to forget that Ed is not an independent agent. Izzy Misunderstanders like to paint Izzy as controlling, but Izzy is the one being ordered by a superior. When Ed decides that, actually, the crew is going to become a travelling ship-based variety act, who do you think Ed expects to help organize these plans? Who is going to have to implement these orders? Who is going to be dealing with the consequences when it turns out this may not a practical idea?
And sure, we can say that Ed is free to choose his path, and Izzy is free to leave. But I think most of us would agree that this would require a serious, likely emotional conversation where they both talk about their expectations and needs. Remember how long these two have been working together.
But Ed doesn't think he needs that, because he assumes that Izzy will come around and do what he wants, because until recently that's what Izzy has done.
So, yeah, Izzy said some hurtful shit to Ed, shit that struck a chord. But Ed isn't, and wasn't, the only one hurting in that scene. Izzy's closet friend left him, came back expecting to resume their own partnership without apology, and turned Izzy's entire career and way of life upside-down without warning.
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I have thoughts about the clip and especially about Fang and generally all of the scene so yeah, an analysis-like tangent full of spoilers below cut
Out of the entire crew, I think Fang and Frenchie (especially Fang) are literally the best people to recieve comfort from. It's double true for Izzy.
Not only do they have like. The least invasive and violent trauma out of the crew, but they're both very empathetic and want to help others in distress. Even when that person isn't a particular ray of sunshine... like Izzy.
It also makes sense for Fang to be the main comforter. He knows Izzy. He's known him for a long while. And he's known Blackbeard for a long while too.
Watching him from the beginning of the clip, he seems to be the first one to notice Izzy's not feeling great. Far before the others do!
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This is the first we directly see Fang in the clip and yeah he looks surprised that they're throwing loot overboard - as you should be but... even more than that he looks ALARMED. He knows something's up.
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After listening to Izzy for a few seconds he is completely sure something's up. He checks in with Frenchie to know if he's seeing it too. We don't know where Frenchie is looking, but I'd assume he reciprocates the look.
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Izzy stops mid-sentence. That's not like him. The others will have noticed it too now. Sure enough, here's Jim, thoroughly confused and/or taken aback at least.
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Fang protection mode ACTIVATE! His first thought is to ask how Izzy's doing (i am so soft for them oh my god-) and to touch him - reassure him. Ground him.
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we then get a "I'm fine, unhand me" which Fang does, to give Izzy some space and checks in again with a "you really don't seem fine". He waits for Izzy's response. He wants to make SURE Izzy's okay, or rather, is patiently waiting for him to admit that he's not.
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The others join in saying that they've noticed. They've noticed how destructive his relationship with Ed is. I can't even imagine what's running through Izzy's mind at this moment. Probably like a waterfall of emotion - shame and anger and sadness and everything is too much - he's soon to break. He's trying so hard to hold it back, but he can't. He can't, when the truth is being thrown directly at his face by his own crewmates.
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Frenchie comments "he's cut off at least two more of your toes hasn't he?" and Izzy almost flinches at that sentence. He quivers. That's his breaking point. And I. have to stop a bit to look at the implications of this. Form this scene at least, I understood taht when Izzy fails to make the crew follow orders, he gets physically punished. As we heard earlier: "It is your job to f-" *he stops, he shakes slightly* he's thinking about the consequences of them not following his orders - more of his toes cut off. That's horrifying. I'd start crying too, jesus...
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Fang knows it's his breaking point and goes back to comfort him - even forcing it a bit on him, because he knows Izzy will struggle, but needs it. God, does he need it. He's always pushing people away, but Fang won't let him this time. He won't let himself be pushed away, because he cares. And he wants to show Izzy that he cares. So he persists.
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And after only a few seconds of a very feeble struggle, Izzy accepts it. He's been strong for so long. He's been brave and hurting and isolated and repressed for so. So long. And he needs to let go. And he does. He whimpers. He sounds like a puppy who's been kicked. And he is. He is a puppy. A puppy that's been severely hurt and doesn't WANT to be hurt anymore. (god, i am weak at the knees, someone call the ambulace, i think i'm dying)
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Frenchie steps in as secondary comfort to show that Izzy's really not alone in this and that none of them actually hate him. Even if he thinks he deserves it. Not even Stede's former crew hate him. That's what Frenchie represents here - to me. Fang and frenchie together show him that love isn't meant to hurt so much. It's not meant to be like this. And they also ground him in that moment. Izzy looks at Frenchie several times as he whimpers, perhaps checking in - seeing if Frenchie leaves after seeing him weak. But he doesn't. He stayes and he waits for Izzy to be okay and I think that means the world to Izzy. It means the world to me too. Izzy deserves all the comfort by this point.
Also I want to throw Edward overboard.
11/10 i need Izzy to have more hugs
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starks-hero · 1 year
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Noceur (n.) - to find comfort in the dark
Pairing: Izzy Hands x Reader
Summary: You'd reached the genius conclusion that you couldn't have nightmares if you simply didn't sleep. Izzy isn't a fan of your logic.
Word Count: 1.6k
a/n: Stede may be Edward's lighthouse but Izzy is Reader's anchor. Because I'm a sucker for symbolism.
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You stood on the quarterdeck, arms crossed carefully over the rail. It wasn't often you experienced nights like this, quiet and peaceful; nights where you could look out over the water and feel certain that nothing was hiding under the waves or lurking in the fog.
The clouds that had rolled in from the east had swallowed up the moon and sent Buttons away in turn. Once he'd disappeared below deck it was just you and the sea. You could hear the waves kissing the hull beneath you, the wind occasionally rippling the sails. Each subtle creek and groan of the ship steadied your mind.
You matched your breathing with the coming and going of the waves, the salt of the sea air filling your lungs. You'd almost mastered it, using the sounds of the ocean and the way of water to ground yourself.
You were so focused, in fact, that you failed to hear the splintering of the deck beneath heavy footsteps until a hand had already reached out and brushed your shoulder.
The stranger may have found your yelp of fear somewhat amusing if it weren't immediately followed by the cocking of a loaded pistol.
You turned and were met by the bemused first mate.
“Fuck, Izzy–” You lowered your weapon. “I told you I'd take the watch tonight.”
"Since when did I take orders from you?" the slight intimidation in his tone was discredited by the fond nudge of his shoulder against your own. He settled beside you, glancing out over the waves. He stood so close that your knees brushed and the floorboards groaned beneath your shared weight. You smiled despite yourself.
Only in the dark would Israel Hands allow himself be so soft. It was an odd sort of honor, you thought, to see him like this. You had shared enough night watches with the first mate to have been offered a glance beneath the sullen stares and stern hand. Spent enough hours in the dark together sitting in the crow's nest to have caught sight of his smile and see how it made him look ten years younger. On nights like those you could only be glad that the waters around Tortuga were generally quiet as you would have failed to see the entire Spanish armada if it were lined up in front of you. Izzy kept you steady, an anchor preventing you from cracking up on rocks of your own making.
You wished the crew knew him as you did but you were not one to tempt faith, especially not when it had already been so generous.
“What's going on with you?” Izzy asked eventually. The breathy tone of his voice seemed at one with the wind.
You shifted your weight. Behind you, the foresail beat faintly against the mast.
None of the crew had noticed yet. And if they had, they'd decided against saying anything. They stayed quiet as you agreed to the night watch night after night. And you were happy with that system, it was the easiest way to keep the nightmares at bay.
“I'm tired,” you said. It wasn't a lie.
Izzy hummed, an unconvincing sound that hung in the air between you. He glanced your way and when you still said nothing he reached for his pocket. The orange he produced was small, jagged scars running along its skin and already adopting a green hue.
You made a small noise of amusement.
Wordlessly, Izzy began to peel the fruit. He dug his thumb into its center and tore it in two clean halves before offering one to you.
It was somewhat of a tradition, Roach had prepared you rations for your night shifts but upon realizing that you were asking for larger portions solely to share with the first mate he'd stopped the service altogether. The chef's pettiness truly knew no bounds.
Izzy decided the next course of action was to just steal food from the kitchen instead. It was something he got oddly excited about; a feared pirate that pillaged dozens of merchant ships in his lifetime smiling like a young lad as he showed you the stale biscuits and ailing fruits he'd stolen from under the nose of your chef.
You accepted the orange with a small smile.
Izzy cleaned the citrus juice from his fingers with his tongue before tearing the fruit into segments, examining each before pushing one past his lips. Just like when running the ship, Izzy had a particular way of doing things. Vaguely or half-arsed wasn't his style.
As he ate, you traced the groves of the wood in front of you. The orange sat untouched in your palm.
“Nightmares,” you said eventually. “They keep me up most nights. Sometimes they're so bad I don't want to close my eyes so I figured if I just didn't sleep then...”
It was quiet for a moment, your confession growing stale the longer it hung in the air. You already wished you'd said nothing.
Izzy tossed the last of his fruit overboard.
“For someone so clever, you can be a right fucking twat.”
You couldn't help but laugh. “And you're a pioneer in self-care all of a sudden? Being Blackbeard's lapdog–”
“Watch it.” Izzy's tone readopted a sharp edge. You stood with a resigned sigh, an undeserving crate earning a sharp clip of your boot as you turned.
“Just leave it, Iz. Forget I mentioned it,” you said. “I don't need you of all people lecturing me on how to look after myself.”
You made your way down the steps that led onto the main deck, ignoring how Izzy called after you. In your haste and frustration, and certainly no thanks to your lack of sleep, your boot missed the next step and you began a sudden descent toward the ground.
A hand grasped your shoulder and a harsh yank backward recentered your point of gravity.
“You're a fucking wreck,” Izzy said, moving his hold to your forearm.
“I'm fine.”
“Bullshit.”
You didn't look at him as you steadied yourself. Instead you aimed your focus on the splintered wood beneath your boots.
You missed Izzy's expression soften, as if he were finally seeing the true extent of your exhaustion. The dimness in your eyes, the poorly hidden fatigue, and the way you swayed on your feet when you didn't have a wooden rail to support you. You were coming apart at the seams.
“Fuck,” Izzy cursed. “How long has it been since you've slept?”
“Three days.”
“Fuck,” Izzy cursed, again. This time with slightly more anger.
You waited for his ranting to begin, to be scorned like the rest of the crew and sent away like a misbehaved child. You wouldn't be surprised if he went to the captains first thing tomorrow and had your duties changed.
“Come on,” he said instead. His words were surprisingly faint. You let him lead you below deck, the dim glow of the ship's oil lamps doing little to light the way. The hand still hesitantly pressed to the small of your back was very possibly the only thing stopping you from keeling over.
Silently you walked through the gallery, past the sleeping crew and the hammock you left empty every night. When you didn't stop you offered the first mate a confused glance.
“Izzy, what-”
“Just-” he sighed. “Keep going.”
You eventually stopped in front of his own cabin and said nothing as he steered you inside and shut the door behind him.
“What are we doing?” The irritation was clear in your tone. The seventy odd hours without rest making your voice heavy.
Izzy loosened the handkerchief around his neck and kicked off his boots. “You are going to lie down,” he said plainly. He grasped the small stool that sat idle in the corner and pulled it towards the bedside. “And I'm going to make sure you get some fucking rest.”
He sat down and crossed his arms. When you didn't move, he sighed again. “You're not the only one. You don't live this life for so long and then get to sleep easy at night. It... it's just not how it works.”
At Izzy's words and what they implied, you caved. Wordlessly, you kicked off your boots, undid your belt, and removed your coat. It was as comfortable as you could get without undressing further. When you lay down on the mattress, you couldn't help the noise of contentment that escaped you. It was by no means the laps of luxury but having a somewhat soft base pillowed against your aching muscles was much nicer than what you were used to.
The fatigue washed over you in heavy waves and you were reminded of just how tired you were.
“If I think it's a nightmare I'll wake you,” Izzy promised, his words were genuine.
“Why are you doing all this, Izzy?” you asked. “I'm fairly certain if Lucius or Roach was having bad dreams you wouldn't invite them into your cabin and offer to play night guard.”
He shrugged. “You're neither of those twats.”
Izzy's words were transparent. 'You're not them. You're you, and you're different.' You laid back in the bed.
The quaint silence that filled Izzy's cabin was similar to the deck during watch, the same safety net there, the same guarantee that nothing said or done would go any further than you, him, and the waves.
You parted your lips to speak. Izzy reached over and dimmed the oil lamp and the dark swallowed your words before they came.
“Thank you, Iz.” You settled for instead. “I mean it.”
Izzy nodded. A quiet 'of course' accompanied the hesitant brush of his fingers against the back of your hand. In the dim light, Izzy was grateful you couldn't see how he looked at you as though you were the reason the sun rose every day.
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Thank you for reading <3
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sarucane · 5 months
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Why didn't Ed always protect Stede?
I'm a bit late to the party and only really got into OFMD with S2, so I've started watching S1 really thoroughly only recently. And I've noticed that there's this narrative in the fandom that Ed and Stede are super protective of each other, particularly Ed--but as I've gone through S1 (number redacted) times, it's been driving me nuts how much Ed doesn't protect Stede.
Sure, there's the meme we all love when Ed stands in front of the firing squad--but for most of the scene before that, he's been standing and watching Stede beg for his life. He's upset, but he doesn't intervene until it's nearly do late. And before that, Ed doesn't say or do a thing about Calico Jack treating Stede like shit--sure it's believable that he just doesn't notice the passive aggression, but not even catching the "Steve" thing? That's something that isn't even intervening, Jack could be making an honest mistake. But the thing no-protection moment that's really driven me nuts is this moment
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In the scene before this, Ed and Stede have just had an incredibly emotionally intimate conversation. Ed is clearly at least half in love with Stede at this point. This is a relationship that means something important to him, this is a person he cares for deeply. And…and Izzy almost murdered Stede in front of him, because of him, and he just looked away.
But at the same time, Ed does love Stede, he does intervene to protect him from the English--at great personal risk and cost. By the end of S2 Ed's much better about this kind of thing (though I'd argue he's never as super-protective as I've seen suggested).
So what was going on here? Ed's a total softie inside, especially with Stede, so why was he like this?
And I've got a theory! Here goes:
Mr. "greatest pirate who ever lived" is, in fact, an overachieving rule-follower (cough teacher's pet cough).
Ed doesn't intervene to help Stede because Ed conforms himself to the rules set by whoever has the strongest personality in a room, or whatever "code" is being pushed on him/is easiest to follow.
I think this is part of why Ed often struggles to identify what he wants, or hold onto a firm sense of his self-identity. And I think it's a lot of why he's so attracted to Stede, and why that relationship is so important to his development: Ed is much less likely to follow the rules when he's one-on-one with someone, and spending a lot of time alone with Stede gives him much more mental space to understand what he wants.
And just like Stede is most successful when he doesn't try to follow the traditional rules of pirating, Ed is most successful--in his relationship with Stede and outside it--when he doesn't obsess over bending to the rules, and instead picks and chooses which ones to follow and which ones to discard.
I have a partly-written super-long version of this where I go episode by episode looking at how the rules theme works with Ed's character mechanics, but I'm just going to focus on the topic question here (I might get around to posting the long version, but I also might be distracted by something shiny;) )
So let's start with The Art of Fuckery and the thing that was driving me crazy.
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Ed's core conflict in this episode was whether he'd going to send Stede to "doggy heaven." Why would he follow Stede to doggy heaven? Because according to Izzy, Stede is categorized as a pet, and Ed has "a policy regarding pets aboard your vessel." It's a rule. Ed has to follow it.
And Ed fully intends to follow it, right up until the kraken turns up and the rules go out the window. And then he's in a safe space with Stede, drowning in memory of the good rules he broke (don't kill people you love). But Stede rejects the idea that Ed breaking that rule makes him a bad person. He appeals, instead, to friendship. And offers his own rule: that they could pretend the murder thing never happened.
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Because that's the amazing thing about Stede: he lives at the intersection of aristocratic and pirate rules (which isn't supposed to exist, and which drew Ed to him), and he makes up his own rules.
When Ed's with Stede, he can follow different rules, unlike anything he'd imagined. Can even sometimes make up his own rules. Can actually pay attention to himself, think about what he wants, what he likes and fears.
But when Ed's in a crowd, or alone with someone trying to impose something on him, he conforms. So when Izzy invokes Pirate Rules and steamrolls Ed ("no you're not doing this,") Ed lets him.
It's a character flaw, and it's a serious one...but it's also one Ed works on when he stops complaining about the treasure hunt business. And when he and Stede discuss the idea of co-captains, and arrangement that would break the rule that "a ship has only one captain."
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Which Ed is able to do because he's in a safe space. Calico Jack disrupts that, and introduces a succession of games with clearly defined rules, which Ed follows one after another. And Ed has so little self-awareness, is so easily swamped by Jack's personality, that he doesn't notice how Jack's treating Stede, let alone defend him, and he bows to every hint of pressure.
And all that culminates in Ed having to make a decision: follow pirate rules, where everyone's just at "various stages of screwing each other over," or do what he wants. Go help his friend, the guy he loves.
Which just ends up with him being absorbed right back into the pirate system of rules. He tries to use this at first, faking a confession on the grounds that he's a "life is cheap sort of guy." But Izzy's outsmarted him, and Izzy invokes pirate rules again: that Ed told him the rule for a first mate was "above all loyalty to your captain."
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Ed doesn't call out for the Act of Grace until the last minute. He could have done it at the trial--he didn't. This is a hard thing for him to do, because he's surrounded by rule-following pressure, from Izzy and from Chauncy. The last time he was in a situation like this, Ed just looked away and let Stede die (he thought).
But the thing about Ed is that he's "half insane." For years, he used the combo of being considered "mad" and also having Izzy around to have his cake and eat it too with rules, to be the world's greatest pirate and also hang onto his own authentic self.
As a result, Ed got good at finding loopholes. Places where you can follow the rules and break them, at the same time. Getting run through, but in a place that missed "all the important bits." Being sentenced to death, but asking for an Act of Grace.
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It's a big deal when Ed steps in front of Stede like that. He's acting against pirate rules, risking being absorbed by the rules set by the English.
He does it for Stede--and that starts to set him free. After that, Ed's never just following the rules again. He actually can't, even when he tries: his going kraken at the end of S1 and start of S2 is doomed from the start and full of contradictions, starting with the fact that he's on Stede's ship, the ship with hidden passages where rule-breaking can be hidden until it's needed.
Ed struggles a lot to figure out which rules to follow ("I will abide by the guidelines"), which rules to set aside ("Can we take it slow?"), when to make up his own rules ("So we're innkeepers now."). And Stede helps him, telling him things like "This can be whatever we want it to be," and "you're not a dick, life's a dick."
I don't really have a clever conclusion to this particular meta. It's a messy thing, and individual figuring out how to their life does and does not intersect with society. This theme doesn't resolve neatly, it just stops at the end of the season, like the tension between Ed/kraken/Blackbeard.
But there's a lot of hope here, I think. When Ed acts to protect Stede, and to fight alongside him, he's not just being a protective partner. It's a learned action, the physical manifestation of a decision Ed's made about who he wants to be in the world. Rules be damned.
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A little thing that kinda annoys me in the popular OFMD fandom headcanon sphere is that it often seems that Ed is presented as the jealous, possessive type, and I just don't think that makes a lot of sense with how we actually see him act.
When Ed thought Stede abandoned him, he barely even fucking questioned it. He waited all night, heartbroken, of course, but his assumption was that he just deserved that. Our boy has negative self-esteem and thinks he's unloveable, his reaction to thinking that Stede is flirting with someone else or cheating on him is going to be to melt into a weepy puddle of self-doubt.
On top of that, even when Ed is upset with Stede in s2e4, these boys trust each other so much. Ed doesn't believe Stede willingly kissed Anne because Stede is Super Gay, yes, but he also doesn't believe that because Stede told him so. He doesn't even entertain it, doesn't get jealous for even a second. Ed and Stede do not make habits out of lying to each other and they are heartachingly earnest with one another, I genuinely think a little reassurance would be all Ed needed to believe Stede isn't cheating on him or planning on breaking up with him.
I just don't buy the idea that Ed's much of the jealous type, especially when it merges with ideas that he'd get violent with anyone hitting on Stede. It just doesn't hold up. Ed's reaction to being sad and upset isn't violence, he's going to be pouting and crying about it.
Stede, on the other hand? I could absolutely see Stede acting jealous if he thought someone was hitting on Ed. I mean, look at him spying on Jack and Ed all night in s1e8! He's telling on himself already, and when they're actually a couple? Imagine his "that's the captain's chair!!!" voice but "he's MY boyfriend!!!" instead.
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