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jackiequick · 6 months

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The truth hurts, doesn’t it? | Agents Of SHIELD Fanfic

Summary: Everything good must have been an interesting lie underneath it all, waiting to be uncovered, but the question is how will you take it?

Pairing: Grant Ward x OC, Grant Ward & Amelia Parker (WardParker)

Setting: Captain America The Winter Solider and Agents Of SHIELD season 1

Spoilers for Agents Of SHIELD 1x17–1x20

Warning: Blood, mentions of anxiety, heartbreak, a bit of manipulation, betrayal

Characters mentioned: Nikolai, Marlene, Melissa, Coulson, Fury, May, Skye, Fitzsimmons, Tripp and The Young Avengers

——

It felt like madness. The air was thick and colder than they would’ve liked. The team was tired, confused and more or less worried. Trying to figure out what to do next and how to stick together while doing so. There were some agents coming in and out of the bunker, they were even set underneath an lie detector and all passed with flying colors.

The cell service was better than expect, they had food, water, and shelter that’s what matters.

It was a late afternoon when it happened.

Practically night.

Everyone was doing their own thing. Some were trying to rest like Fitz and Jemma, some were on computers doing research such as Skye, and others were training themselves for the bigger fight near the locker area.

Amelia felt on edge, these last few weeks it was like a nervous twitch creeping up on her waiting to snap. She wasn’t thinking straight about anything, as far as they knew Fury is dead. Hell, she wasn’t sure if Nikolai, Marlene, or Melissa were fully aware of the situation in place, even though she sent an critical message to them.

She knew that none of the young avengers or adults one had any clue about what exactly was happening, due to the truth of Coulson’s death was kept from most of them. But HYDRA creeping around wasn’t something truly hidden per say…

Sometimes she felt like it was this shivering headache that reached from the back of her neck toward the front of her forehead. This whole situation bothered her to the inch of her bones, this chilling adventure she didn’t remember signing up for in the first place.

Maybe she needed a nap? Watch a video to relax her mind? Hell, splash some water crossed her face to try and clear her head?

Walking past the supply room, she left oddly enough weary like she was missing something. It was just her anxiety seeping itself, as she thought. An odd feeling recklessly filled the rest of the area, as she scurried into one of the restrooms.

Closing the door behind her, she let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. Her joints hurt, twisting themselves into her shoulders as she rested her arms against the bathroom sink. Her vision went blurry for a moment, her back arched froward as she unzipped her jacket to breathe and roll up her sleeves.

She turned on the knobs as she splashed some cold water on her face, wiping her eyes browns and rubbed her eyelids facing the mirror for a quick second. She mumbled a few things to herself, wishing she was back on the bus with her friends like nothing happened, but she knew it couldn’t do a blasted thing about it. She grabbed an towel to dry her face, as she wiped her face out of the corner of her eye she noticed something that set her off.

An automatic sliding painting that was supposed to set to afternoon, was lowing a hushed flickering light. She clenched the towel against her fist stepping forward to notice an dagger, a small knife, stabbed into the edge of the painting. It was waiting to bent over and break, there was a hatch breathe in Amelia’s throat as she removed it from the placing.

The painting slid upwards to display a horrific glint of flickering lights as the slashing words ran across the screen. The sunset frame brushed against the wording in deep gashes.

Amelia blinked, gasping a shaky breath that catches in her throat. She shakes her head at the wording in disbelief, as if she couldn’t do anything but freeze. Her fingernails were pressed so hard against her palm, she would’ve drawn blood.

“N-no..” She mumbled underneath her breath, “..no, no..no!”

Suddenly her voice became so small, her eyes waters and her mouth went dry. The denial sinks in so fast, she stumbled back hesitant to run her fingers across the painting.

“It’s not him..” She muttered softly accidentally dropping the towel on the floor, unable to breathe once again and laced in shock.

Ward Is Hydra.

The words ran by her eyesight in pure shock. She thought it was a trick, some sort of joke being made to use her own wits against the team. Amelia heard people saying that Coulson or May might be Hydra, that even one of their agents might play a game to see who’s loyal or not.

Someone knew about this before her, but they couldn’t. They all passes every single test with—

An loud noise startled Amelia, hands of her hips as she ran her hands above her waistline stumbling out of the room shaking her head taking another glance at the sign. She practically slid down the hallway, tripped over her steps stopped inside one of the supply closets to find Jemma racing out of the room at the same time as she entered.

She narrowed her vision in confusion, sending a odd look to her teammates. They were field agents but also scientists and technicians who weren’t used to this whole thing, so it was understandable if they was uneasy with whatever they saw. But it couldn’t be that bad, right?

Wrong!

The moment she wiped her head inside the room, the sight would’ve had her screaming if it weren’t for her biting her buttons lip and gripping the doorknob. There was a blush of heated dripping liquid slowly hitting the floor from above, as her gaze followed it towards the red drops, her eyes widened.

Blood from a fellow agent, laying dead against the ceiling and high shelves. Their eyes were closed, killed in the late hours of the afternoon in a dark supply closet. Amelia was left in utter tears, silence and shockingly loud noise ringing in her heads. She felt hurt and heavy, wonder where the hell is the rest of the team.

Amelia felt like she might throw up, fumbling with her pocket trying to reach her phone as her other hand cover her mouth. She tried reaching Nikolai and no response, Marlene and no response and even Melissa had no single response. There was a mole in the bunker.

Skye was still upstairs doing research, as Amelia raced upstairs to face her as she whisper yelled, “Skye! What do you know?”

She looked up with a gasping glare, “I’m guessing you know?”

“Yes! And it’s not him..it can’t be him!”

“You don’t know that..Ward has lied to us, Amelia..he’s Hydra.”

“He lied to the team! But I have known that man for 4 years, Skye! 4 years!”

“You think I like this?! I fell for the man, I kissed him..I still think I love him..”

“Oh god..okay, maybe this is just a game right? Ward treats us different, something’s not right..”

“…you still feel like you love him, don’t you?”

“Well the truth hurts, doesn’t it Skye? We just gotta play along.”

“I’m already doing that, I feel hurt Amelia. But I’m gonna follow Ward, see what’s going on in his head and if something happens.”

“Okay, yeah..okay. I’ll try to see who I can contact and prepare for whatever Ward thinks he might pull..”

There was an unspoken sense of urgency in their eyes. Grant Ward is Hydra but that concern and confusion hurt both of their feelings.

Mainly Amelia’s heart.

It felt like the five stages of grief, sadness and anxiety was rushing across her veins. She felt alone, betrayed and abandoned, even though she wasn’t, it felt that way.

———

The next 48 hours was a world wind..

So many things happened, from unexpected agents trying ambushing the bunker and buildings to the news about some of their fellow agents dying protecting the property of SHIELD. No one knew who was right or wronged here, who’s good and who’s bad. Fitz and Simmons were off doing their own thing for Coulson, May have gone with a couple of glares, Tripp rushed off to get extra stuff, and John Garrets got into a fight with Coulson.

Hell, Skye was sharing a few short moments with Ward himself.

Honestly Amelia felt bad for Skye, she knew she felt deeply for Ward since their chemistry climbed upon the time they all spend together on the plane. She also knew Grant felt some very similar feelings for her, as he was teased about it from the team.

She was still trying to contact her friends but nothing came up, tears rising to be released. She felt nauseous, a little numb and bruised. As if she was in the middle of a hot flash.

Currently, she sat nearby couch of a decently small room with her head in her hands, tiredly sighing. The door gently opened as in came the man of the hour, noticing her downing look as he looked at the girl in concern.

He sat down beside her, leaning against one of the chairs and asked, “Sweetheart..are you okay?”

“Hm?” She replied, peeking in between her hands to look at him.

“What happened?”

“You really asking me that?”

He scoffed, “Yeah, I know what’s happening. I wish it wasn’t like this but we can’t do anything about it.”

“It feels like I’m being caught in a horror movie.” She added.

“What? Like Scream? Who’s the killer?”

“One of our agents..we don’t know who’s on our side or not.”

“More like multiple agents, you don’t know who is really involved in SHIELD or HYDRA. You probably think I can’t be trusted, Ames.”

“Ward, honey, I trust you. I do. But the question is, will you actually be telling me the truth or not..”

“I alway try to tell you the truth, even if it hurts.”

At that moment, she removed her hands from her face and turned to face him, “Oh really?”

He straightened his shoulders seeing the look on her face as he sighed, “Amelia, are you seriously asking me that?”

“Grant, you lied to me before about missions to keep me and the team safe. You could be lying to me right now.”

“And you lied to me more than once to keep me in the loop. I’m being honest here. Do you trust me?”

“Do you trust enough to tell me the truth?”

~~~

And there it was again. The line that has been repeatedly said by one another the moment they trained, to the times the group was on the road for missions. Even in moments of daring action, where it might result in something serious or stupid.

The glances, the nods, the smiles or smirks, the pointing and the questions..

Do you trust me?

It hurts how much those words carried so much, such as a heavyweight question to them.

~~~

They both sat there in silence. The silence was so loud, it was painful to even notice the smell of their perfume and cologne that filled the room. Ward could see the oddly wave of emotions that washed over her face, it honestly felt like he was ripping her heart out of her chest.

He hated seeing her upset, it’s why Grant practically took a beating from his boss, Garret, when the man told him how soft he gets around the people he cared for. And he won’t admit it but it’s true. Deep down he cared about Amelia, Daisy, Fitz and Jemma. He respected Coulson and May. Especially with how much time he spent with the team was placed into.

“Do you trust us? Did you even love me?” Said a small broken voice that belonged to Amelia, looking down at her hands, her fingers were laced with cuts and small gashes.

“Oh my god, Ames..” He replied, standing up as he went to sit down next to her grabbing her hand gently, “..of course, I trust you. You know I love you, I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you if it meant you would feel like this.”

“I’ve known you for 4 years Grant. 4 years, I have stood by your side fighting on the ground and the skies to make sure everyone was safe, to come home safe and sound. As a team and now..”

“4 years and I don’t regret anything, none of our time together. I can explain whatever it is that is crossing your mind.”

She knows. He knows.

Amelia wiped her head over to see him and asked, “Can you?! Can you look me in the eye and tell me you are on the same team?”

“You weren’t meant to get hurt! You and I were always on the same team, don’t you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you!” Grant replied yelling, hesitant to let her hand go.

“I swear, you weren’t even on the same team to beginning with! You were loyal to HYDRA.”

“No. I wasn’t ever loyal to HYDRA, if anything I would say I’m loyal to Garret.”

“You killed people.”

“And you haven’t?”

“I..”

“The last few days you have shot down unexpected agents, not knowing if they were on your side or not. You and I are just trying to protect ourselves here! That’s all what we’re trying to do.”

“Were you ever gonna tell me?”

“Of course I was. Garret wanted you dead! I couldn’t let that happen! I’m trying to protect you here, I was just trying to protect all of us.”

“By keeping this secret from me? I know you are never one to talk about how you feel, but this..this should’ve been something you should’ve told me..”

“And have you act like this towards me? I told you years ago, I’m not a good man, Ames..and yet you stood by me. You and Skye decided to stay beside me no matter how bad it got.”

“And I said ‘yes you are.’ But right now, i just can’t imagine what I should and shouldn’t believe here. Was I pawned in your little lie, huh? Was I?”

At some point both of them were standing up, pacing the room grunting and groaning in annoyance. The room felt like it was heating up due to the argument that forming between them.

Tears were forever forming in her eyesight, running her fingers across her hair as her eyebrows furrowed as her glares softened. She was hurt, she more than hurt and her emotions were breaking in front of her. Tears that being hold back for more than 48 hours finally were getting to see the light of day.

He sighed deeply, wishing he didn’t see those tears, knowing that he will have to deal with Skye later on but this, he looked away from. His hands rested on his hips shaking his head, his anger was rising and his annoyance was taking form. This wasn’t the plan, she wasn’t supposed to get hurt. It wasn’t supposed to be personal for any of them.

“No. You weren’t ever part of the plan nor a pawn, Ames. Believe me, I didn’t expect you to come into my life and change things up!” Grant admitted closing his eyes shut, “It’s over. It’s done, i can’t do anything about it. For once in my life I wanted something that was for me, not Garret giving me orders here! And you came in, yes I lied to you but it wasn’t personal..I swear it wasn’t!”

“Oh, but i think it was! Please, Grant I’m begging you..you’re living a double life here! Getting so close, yet so far to people. I didn’t expect for you to come into my life but you did!” She admitted, “..you were..you lied to me. You lied to me. Don’t hurt Skye, more you than probably are already.”

“I won’t regret getting here and I won’t think about hurting Skye. But Ames, someday you will understand what i have gone through to keep you safe because I love you..”

“So why does it hurt so bad? What are you gonna do next? Lock me up in here? Because your definition of keeping me safe from it all sounds like a hell lot of lies..why?”

“Everything i ever felt for you was real, don’t you get it?! But I won’t betray Garret..”

“..because me and the team woke up a weakness inside of you. I..i don’t know what to think, or believe right now, alright?! I..i..”

Amelia felt weak, not like an agent of shield or anything. Just hurt, broken, betrayed as she crumbled underneath her feet about to walk away.

That was when Ward gently swiftly her back in effort to calm her down as she tried fighting back.

She tried pulling away, hitting him in the chest as hard as she could, causing him to stumble back regaining his stance. Grant just held her in his arms, grabbing her wrist as she repeatedly kept hitting his chest.

“Stop! Stop it, Ames!” Ward said, practically growled at her, “You’re embarrassing yourself here. I won’t kill you or our team, i promise!”

“You promise?” She said, mumbling and stopped hitting his chest, resting her forehead against his chest instead.

“I promise. You can tell them or shout it from the rooftops, but HYDRA is already here.”

“I failed..you failed me, Grant. HYDRA is here..oh god, there’s nothing else to say.”

“I know, baby. I know..”

She just cried into his arms, banging her fist softly again his best. He wrapped kept his embrace tightly, closing his eyes and kissed her forehead before walking away.

“W-where you going?” She asked.

“It’s for your own good, Ames.” He replied.

Without a second later, Grant speeded away out the door, locking the door behind him as you can hear Amelia screams and shouted trying to unlock it. He squeezed his eyes shut and made his out of the hallway.

Amelia grunted realized what he was about to do and scrambled to search for her phone, quickly she texted Skye a message.

‘He’s coming to you.’ She messaged

She responded, ‘On it. You okay?’

‘Will be..’

‘Okay.’

———

Amelia Parker was on the verge of tears once again, anger filling up her mind and conflicted onto what was happening next.

Her next move was informing Coulson, Hill and whoever else was online about what she knows from her research. At the same time, she tried finding a way out, possibly crawling across the vent.

“T-this is agent..Amelia Parker..we found one of the moles, Hydra is dead set of seeking into whatever corner they can. Garret is one of leaders, i don’t know who’s his boss but we need extra weapons, load up the power grids at every SHIELD Facility we can. You should know that Project Insight is part of it. Keep a-any updates coming from any scanners and detectors available. And most importantly, watch your six, you..you don’t know who is your friend or foe..” She said into her voicemail, messaging anyone on her contact list.

She knew that her voice message may have come out choppy or a bit rushed per say due to the sound of her voice, but it was all she can mange at the moment. It sounds like she was exhausted and most likely finished crying before starting that message.

She was practically locked in a bunker in what feels like the middle of nowhere, with not the best service but it manageable if you knew how to handle some technical problems. She just found out that the organization, she has been working for has a lot of issues and the people she thought she knew had more secrets than she ever expected…

Of course she was a mess!

Her only hopes were that she can get out here soon, and her message was sent out to her friends and fellow actual agents. Oh heavens, did she hope her friends and loved ones were safe..

——

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