#hhhhhhh im so fucking gay

[aggressively-selfships]

BRO

THATS MINE AND CHARLES HEIGHT DIFFERENCE

(I'm the short one ajxjskxnsk)

#hhhhhhh im so fucking gay #AND HE BROAD TOO #omg i need him #poison arrow

[cottagecryptic]

EXCITED DXCITED EXCITED

#Yall have no idea how fucking psyched i am to put together this fucking gift #beef follows me so i cant spill but HHHHHHH THEYRE GONNA LOVE #ims o gay i love my bf #tez talks

[paruparucream]

YOURE DOING AMAZING QUEEN

#WHEN THEY SAID TWO COSTUMES I LITERALLY SCREECHED #IM SO HAPPY FOR HER!!!!SHE FINALLY GOT A MAGIC CANDYYYY #HHHHHHH IM SO GAY RN #cookie run #cookie run ovenbreak #sea fairy cookie #not art #ally shut the fuck up

[thecoolestmoe]

me @ wayhaught

#hhhhhhh im so fucking gay holy shit that scene was so good and beautiful and GAY #wayhaught #waverly earp #nicole haught #wynonna earp #wearp #wearp spoilers

[synchlora]

why r men pretty

#/j but also pls hhhhhhhhh how r boys so fuckin cute dude what the hell #it is once again dumbass gay hours (but then again when is it not honestly) #i just hhhhhhhhh #im like okay im immune to guys looking cute and then i immediately am like WAIT but this guy rly is cute and i just hhhhhhh #ahvksckscsckscsjcsckdcd my brain is all over the place man help #im too fucking gay for this godamn world #why is everything so confusing and why r men so fucking PRETTYYYYYY hhhhhhh #dumbass thots #caps in tags

[victory-cookies]

kinda wanna change my name to max....................

#i see one gay skater boy and one unhinged lagomorph and i latch onto the name huh? #i just like it bc then i could have a cool sophisticated full name like maximilian or maxwell #and max is nice and short and somewhat andro #hhhhhhh but name changing is such a fucking process and i do like my current name #idk #im not coming out anytime soon so ill have lots of time to think about it

[itsvs-moved]

"STOP BEING GAY!"

No, I'll stop being gay when you stop being so cute.

#my feelings hhhhhhh #im so fucking gay i just can't stop #staring at girls 🥺 #wlw #sapphic #lesbian #lesbian pride #lgbt #lgbtpride #sam rants #gorls #i love gorls

[lickingteeth]

nsfw also mainly me thirsting over my boyfriend lmao v

#so basically #my dick twitches at any giy i see atm #cause my gay ass is like HhhhHHH BOYS BOYS BOYS #and also #im affection starved from my boyfriend right now #cause we havent hung out one on one in a while #and like holy shit i just want him to give me a hicky my man!! #fucking suck on my neck and let me just AHHH #please #ugh i hate this bruh #deadassery i need to him to just fucking bite my neck and fucking have his hands roam my back like i #need it bruh #i need him #so badly right now

[sensesdialed-a]

I will be watching captain marvel in approximately 25 hours

#(BITCH!! IM SO EXCITED!! AND GAY!! AND READY!!) #(hhHHHHH) #(carol and fury and goose the cat already own my heart what the fuck) #(I WONT BREATHE FOR A SINGLE SECOND TOMORROW) #{ my secret identity; ooc }

[embers-burning-bright]

my hyperactivity is offf the shITS tonighht!!!!!!!

#embers-hoots #gonna keeep the typos im making for a change bc i feel it adds to the affect!!!!! #i watch!!! one!!!! dnd game with bdg and!!!!!! dopamine shots babey!!!! #hyperfixation time and now i can NOT turn off my energty #it was so fucking good you guys #so good #and GAY #i fuckin am HERE for it!!!! #god the ending was realoly sweet too!!! and ALL THE CHARACTERS WERE GREAT #obv hargis is wonderful but also gorgug owns my heart too #all such good characters #and the gm was so fun and stuff!!! hes a really good gm #god im so. hyped up i wanna jump around again #im like gliding when i walk dasjhgdj im just... i really am jsut an adhd bastard aint i #i wanna do everything ever right now #im listening to mika rn #i was gonna play celeste tonight but!!!! im way too pumped hhhhhhh #i might play some rhythm games with like. pure ravey junk #bc i need smth TO CRUBNCH MY ENERGY but its also late night #i came down stairs earlier and my mum asked me to stop being juumpy lmao #why am i. why cant i consume content i love without getting PUMPED #its the adhd and hyperfixations but also my dude #come on its just dnd #gay dnd #gay dnd with bdg #like come on #thats like three good things at once im going to die #im v hyped and MAN its good #today we dine like kings #and by dine i mean have dopamine for once dihaskdhk

[jack-owo-valentine]

.

#if you like him and he likes you #why are you trying to ignore your feelings #any of you sensible mfs might ask #and the answer is im fucking stupid and 2 gay for this shit #i cannot handle feelings #i just nah #cant do it #theyre 2 much and im legit having panik attacks over this shit or paranoia bc oh god #like- aaaaa #also i cannot handle doing anything wrong #and obvi i fuck up n do dumb shit wayyy more often around hc n him n ppl i like #so like #its just #a fucking mess #honestly like i just hhhhhhh #also honestly hes just way 2 cool for me. sir plz

[tackysapphic]

I just started watching Wynonna Earp and oh my godddd Wynonna is so fucking hot oh god

#kj.txt #hhhhhhh #im so fucking gay

[coridallasmultipass]

.

#no ones talking to me so im just gona gush on here #im so high rn and blasting A Like Supreme and im about to cry bc i love c77 so fuckin much #im gushy for v and kerry and johnny and kerry and v and johnny and #i just wanna play a like supreme on guitar its fuckin sick as hell and im just so gay #i am gay #gay gay gay #i want to be on stage playing it with them like aaaaaa i needa replay that mission i s2g #this fucking game has been hitting me with so many feels im so fuckin obsessed #i cant get enough and i havent finished the game yet #i only played a few mins this morning bc ive been busy all day and just listening to the music #im right there #qaaahhhh i love it so much #i m gonna cosplay johnny i s2g i gotta dye my hair black tmr and make an arm sleeve and itll be sick as hell #hhhhhhh ok im ma stop gushing im probably embarrassing future cori

[farmersliga]

hottest players for you?

HMM OKAY sorry this took way more time than you probs expected but ive been thinking abt this very hard. disclaimer some of these guys i dont know a lot abt i just found them hot when i watched them so if anyone’s problematic im so sorry skdhdkjd. in no particular order:

(under the cut bc holy fuck this got longer than i expected. i feel like i dissected my own brain and also i think i have too much thirst…….)

robert lewandowski - he has sculpted abs okay im not immune. like every time he pulls off his shirt? after making the hottest goals look easy? hell yes. and also his eyes hi hello let me stare at them forever.

manuel neuer - listen,,,,, he’s tall and blonde and has an ass to die for. his face looks like it was sculpted by the gods. esp schalke manu holy fuck i love him now but back then? he looked like an angel and i want to ruin him, i want to do unspeakable things that will result in his fall from heaven

marco reus - controversial ik but there’s Something about him. i can’t place it. he’s just rly hot at specific angles. like in that one specific gif i did of him with the leather jacket and the styled hair my god

thomas müller - similar to the above, at certain angles my mind goes hmmm hello. also his whole energy is so hot like wow. AND he’s so expressive and when he opens his mouth in frustration? well i think Thoughts

kevin trapp - listen. he’s unreal. like objectively, what the actual fuck.

mats hummels - exactly like the above, with the added bonus of being a pathetic little sexy man

serge gnabry - esp when his hair is fluffy. i just love his cheeks and also the way he has a fashion sense

benjamin pavard - i blame the benjigate of a few weeks ago

benedikt höwedes - when he had hair. sorry im not into bald men SKDHDKDHKD and also the old germany nt vibes are mwah

miroslav klose - speaking of old germany nt vibes,,,,,, this guy was sexy in such a pure kinda way it’s insane. i didn’t always like his hairstyle but when it was done right ugh take me now

kostas tsimikas - i blame the kostasgate of a few weeks ago. and also his tattoos are surprisingly also rly hot (unlike every other goddamn footballer)

virgil van dijk - his face? wow. unreal. and the height mm yes im into it. moreso when he’s wearing jackets v specifically

simon kjær - i miss him and his sexy strong presence. there’s like this one particular gif of him grinning as someone who’s about to help him up strokes his face and it lives rent free in my mind

alvaro morata - im so sorry i don’t know why either but somehow he’s honest to god my type. but only when his hair isn’t too short.

son heung-min - not a spurs fan but i. don’t even know what to say. he’s just hot. if you don’t see it then you are wrong. and also i was hooked ever since i saw that puskas goal.

paulo dybala - i probs know this guy the least out of these names here but god he’s just so so so hot goodbye what a face

james rodriguez - similar attraction as with the above and i also don’t know him v well. his career died but he’s still so hot in a boyish way

xabi alonso - jesus what i’d let this man do to me. he’s just so fucking sexy and the spanish is not helping. and when he puts on a suit? yeah hahahahahaha im unwell

iker casillas - also retired but at the start of my football obsession i started watching stuff on spain’s golden era and he was my first player crush okay i don’t understand either. specifically when he was wearing those short sleeved kits back when long sleeves were the standard for goalies mmm yes

BONUS: olivia mcdaniel - goalkeeper for the ph wnt and god her thighs could crush me. and she wears these short fucking shorts and the way she looks on the ground making saves hhhhhhh im unwell. i’ve been kind of obsessed for the past month tbh (shoutout to sami for listening to my gay af rambles)

i may have forgotten someone but this is already so long so. well.

aaaaand special mention to all the other players whom ive thirsted for on this blog but aren’t on this list bc my attraction is such a fickle thing that is easily influenced by particularly good photos of them <3 and sometimes ppl are objectively hot and look good and all but just aren’t my type rly

#god this is long whats wrong with me #I DIDNT EXPECT THIS OKAY #i didnt even put the most cursed ones here #like yeah some of these are probs slightly questionable #but i tried to keep this one as legit as possible #thank you for asking anon i think i went thru several crises thruout the making this list #of* #asks #anon

[sagegreensage]

"ay yo tell us all the reasons that Pirate is the top-tier most smoochable boi in your eyes"

(me, if I were a deep sea telescope fish, upon seeing this ask in my inbox /pos)

OKAY. SO UH. To save all who read this, im going to do this in bullet format so to minimize the risk of there just being a Humongous Wall Of Text. Also, I don't know how to add a 'read more' on mobile, so I'm sorry about how long it is regardless.

Reasons That Pirate Is The Top-Tier Most Smoochable Boi In My Eyes

Okay, so why is he so goddamned cute?????

I'm nearly in literal tears everytime i see a picture of him... He's so fricking cute.

I smile everytime I see or read that he's smiling.

And he has such a beautiful eye color! A warm, rusty red, his iris is black, and his pupil is white. Oh, gorgeous... So gorgeous.

I want to cup his face in my hands and tell him that in doing that, I'm holding my world in my hands.

He just looks so soft and holdable. I want to hold him. Not just his hands (which, btw, are so very cute~!) but all of him. I want to be the big spoon and cuddle him and hhhhhhh. he is so cute and soft lookingggg! Me want hold. (update: *hand. If he'd like, I can design him a hand. Or hook, if he wants. Or both! he can interchange 'em :) For the material of it, I was thinking an arsenic-free alloy consisting of cold-cast bronze and aluminum.)

i bet his lips are soft too... Really soft,,, I would very much so like to smooch him 👉👈 idc if we kiss and his lips are a little dry because of the beach air or the salty sea. I just want to kiss him. Above water and under water. (actually he likely uses chapstick... What flavor of Chapstick does he use..?) (Update again: mwah mwah >3<. yeehaw. he was not wearing Chapstick because he had just woken up so... Next time. but hhhhhhh. the rp. kissie kissie in rp :D)

I would literally swoon/happy panic (is it a gay panic if I'm male But Also female?... Pansexual panic) receiving his good morning and goodnight texts. Or just almost any text from him for that matter... Basically, it'd go like this. Every time.

[over text]

Sweetie Pie (Pirate): Good morning 💖

Me irl, before replying: ASDFGHJKL bro he so cute,,,,,!?

No but, for real: he so cute. How so cute?

The way he shows his trust... Being around someone with his gloves off and or his eyepatch off. An unspoken, subtle show of him trusting that you won't judge or think less of him.

I love his interests asdfghjkl. I've been hyperfixated on marine life and the ocean since 2nd grade. idk how long I've been interested in pirate stuff. It started before Pirate101, which was made in 2012, that just helped me express it. My grandma used to tell me she wanted to be pirate, so I think it was around when i was 4 or 5 that I began thinking pirates were awesome. hhhhhhhhh me want ramble about nautical stuff with him.

me want ramble with Pirate pls.

And Please. Please, let me introduce him to Pirate101. It was the center of my pirate phase when I was younger, which by the way, never died and Pirate just nursed it back to health. I'll pay for his Pirate101 membership. We will co-op fight our enemies together. The big bad stands no chance.

his aestheticccc. fucking Superb!!! Aw, man.... Seeing him dress in his pirate attire gives me Confidence. I would like to dress up a bit more extra. My aesthetic is either tired nerd with a decent closet or near full on steampunk techwear depending on how I feel. He makes me want to dress in more steampunk techwear.

lkjhgfdsa ANYWAYS. His aesthetic!!! I love seeing art of him wearing his aesthetic. Everytime I show my friends his drip they're like, "wow, he looks so fancy," and like, yes he do. His drip is fancy in that old way, which has then been stolen and worn by a pirate. And basically, that's the pirate drip. Except, unlike your average pirate wearing fancy vintage clothes, Pirate isn't dirty. Pie's clean and they smell very nice.

And the reason he likes pirate paraphernalia is just,,,, yessir! Yes! You love that ocean, bro! The ocean loves you too :) and so do I.

and he's a trans icon :) and not only that, he goes by he/him and they/them pronouns. Amazing!!

iiiii would die and revive for a trip to a store with candles/perfumes/colognes just to look for what I imagine Pie smells like. Odd? Okay, perhaps. but listen. I would die and revive for someone irl to love me like Pirate would. If i buy that scent, you best believe im either spraying the perfume/cologne on some of my pillows and clothing or lighting that candle whenever wherever. Anxious? Lonely? Sad? Empty inside? Pirate's scent fixes all, my friend. a lifehacc, if you will.

I know he has a slight accent, although he suppresses it: i would love to hear it. And when he just wakes up or is drunk, man, oh man. pls, me want hear his accent. (WAIT. when he woke up after he got his arm fixed and i came in the room, was his accent more prevalent at that time? 👀)

I want him to trust me someday enough to not suppress things about himself, like his accent and his purring.

why does he suppress his purring, btw? that's so fricking cute why suppress that? Well, I mean, I know he's ashamed of the fact that he isn't human, and that most humans wouldn't want to be involved with a monster, much less, love and date one. but he's so cute tho. seriously, he could for real just be a scallop with sapience, but if he still was himself I would still fucking love him.

he allegedly gets some of his things out of the trash? yesss. (insert (non)gendered word of choice)boss, this is me: "bb, let's go dumpster diving imma get a ring out of there and use it to be engaged to u someday " terrible no-good very-bad date idea: let's go to the dumpster of Dunkin Donut's. (no but they actually throw away hundreds of perfectly fine donuts every damn night. mind-boggling.)

celebrating Spooky Month together would be great. I would wear whatever he designed, heck yessiree. Man, it would be so cute.

Maybe I'll add to this list later but I think I kept you waiting long enough :3

didnt manage to get all the flustered pansexual panics he gives me or how my thought-process goes everytime I fricking see him but this was a list more for reasons Pie is a total cutie. not me, my butterfly-filled tummy, and my incessant simping 👉👈

#sorry this took a bit. theres so fuckingg much i love about himmmmm. #tw spooky fish #tw spooky #deep sea fish #deep sea tw #tw deep sea #spooky fish tw #deep sea telescope fish #pirate!lemon #fnf pirate!lemon #pirate!lemon fnf #fnf #friday night funkin #tw fnf #fnf tw #fnf lemon monster #lemon monster #lemon monster fnf #tw alcohol mention #tw drunk mention #drunk mention tw #alcohol mention tw #drunk tw #tw drunk #alcohol tw #tw alcohol #tw long post #long post tw #long post

[cybertranny]

Hiiiiiii Neptune, no idea if my previous ask sent, but how's it going?????? Is your break going well???? Unrelated, but the rate at which omfd consumed your brain is truly impressive💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛

noooooo tumblr must have eaten it :((

im going good!!!! (I think.) i currently have 4 whole interests infecting my brain (website, x files, magnus archives, our flag means death) so it has been A Struggle to focus on education but hhhhhhh only two terms left. my break was insanely busy but at least I didn't have to deal with my classmates so it was nice. today is my 2nd day back and i thiiiink I'm going ok w homework

GAY PIRATE SHOW. sam it's SO good you have to watch it. it's better than the x files it's better than tma. fucking OBSESSED it's incredible I haven't stopped thinking about it for WEEKS. dreamt abt izzy hands in drag last night. i promise it's good it's not like succession where the whole site watches a serious depressing show and then talks abt it like it's a comedy ofmd is ACTUALLY a romcom and it's the best. just the best. ed and stede my beloveds I would kill for them. also if you have the ofmd brainrot tag unfiltered that's very impressive i must b very annoying /lh

anyways. rant over how have u been !!!!! are u back at school yet?

#creepy-dolls-are-not-a-crime #💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛