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jadeittic · 1 year

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HS + Y/I: 2022 (SERIES)

EXTRA (8) -- mb i keep procrastinating i swear its not my fault (it is) LMAO

PREVIOUS. NEXT.

HARRY STYLES + PLATONIC!EX-1D MEMBER!FEM!READER

WARNINGS: will be changing face claims for every post ! hope it won't be a bother.

yourinstagram

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yourinstagram perth, get ready.

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username THE AMOUNT OF HARRY CONTENT IS MAKING ME 😫

username o h my god i get to be the first people to hear hs + y/i as the aoty

username DELETE THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME TO HADNLE

harrystyles We praise the people who get drunk the night before anything.

yourinstagram i'm literally going to die from alcohol poisoning because of you

harrystyles Yeah well it's not my fault you keep tagging along with me

yourinstagram SHUT UUUP i only tag along because you cry like a baby if i say no

username the bickering even through texts 😭😭

username LMFAO

username yn can i bring pizza to the show please 🙏

yourinstagram YES PLEASE i deserve a snack from time to time because SOMEONE refuses to let me

username we dont even need namedropping atp we all knowwww who it is

harrystyles WHAT DID I DO?!

username YNRRY IN AUSTRALIAAA EHFSGSEGGSEF

username the amount of adrenaline in me i cant even go to sleep

ynrryupdates

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ynrry YNRRY spotted walking around tourist shops in Perth, Australia just this afternoon. Are we all ready for the show tomorrow night?

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username PARENTS /p

username im so excited im driving to the park jsut to visit

username SO EXCITEDE EEFEGRE

username actually ordering her pizza rn

username I HOPE YN REMEMBERS OMG

username we're listening to the aoty tomorroooooow

username every show feels so unreal

username IRSHEGGESOJR

yourinstagram

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yourinstagram rehearsaaaaals

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username THERES A VIDEO OF YOU GUYS SOUNDCHECKING WOMAN ARE WE GETTING WOMAN TN

yourinstagram huh

username YN

harrystyles NO WONDER WHY YOU'VE BEEN GONE FOR SO LONG

username THEYRE SO GLSEIFJGG

zendaya i miss youuuu

yourinstagram z i miss you so much it hurts

username IM SO EXCITEED

username OHHSG SRIGRGH

username 2023 is treating ynrry so well and im here for it

username I HAVE THE PIZZA YN

yourinstagram it better be my favorite one

ynrry

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ynrry first look at ynrry onstage at perth!

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username WHAT THE FUCK

username i love how they're matching but not matching at all

username ITS SO GOOD TO SEE THEM AGAIN OMG I MISSED THEM SO MUCH

username i am IN TEARS

username SUE AND HIS BESTFRIEND AT PERRRTTTTHHHH

"Okay, so tonight's dinner will be pizza, as I was informed. "Where are you?" Not knowing what she should be looking for other than a pizza box as she makes her way down the catwalk, YN says, "Is there a pizza box I should be looking for, really? — A sudden cheer could be heard from the other side of the stage, where Harry appeared to be pointing down to someone in the audience. Harry said, "C'mere, I think I found her. I'll even check my imaginary watch on my wrist to see how long it'll take her to get here," he said, motioning for YN to come over to his side.

"I actually believed a turtle was with me on stage," Harry jokes with a smirk on his lips, "YN finally made it over, much slower than anyone, actually." By this time, the two are arguing once more and have forgotten that they were looking for the pizza a fan had promised YN she would get at tonight's show.

"Well, I wouldn't really like the opportunity to slip and fall down as I'm running to you, no? - I'm simply being safe, unlike you." YN says with a cheeky grin plastered onto her face, to which Harry replies with a playful, offended look as he dramatically starts crying and places his hands over his eyes to stop his "tears" from falling out.

YN decides to move on, away from the conversation, and approaches the fan, who is holding a pizza box in the air. "Are you the one who promised me dinner?" The fan's head nodding told her everything she needed to know, even though she couldn't really hear what she was saying due to the audience and the earpiece placed in her ears. She then reaches over to the fan, carefully grabbing the box from the fan's hands without falling. As YN holds the box, her excitement quickly builds as she remembers how hungry she was before the show.

"Better hope it's your favorite pizza. If not, the pizza will be mine before you know it!" Harry approaches YN with a sneaky grin on his face. By turning away from the audience to hide the pizza they would be eating on stage, YN and Harry created needless suspense. — The boy standing next to YN laughs as she says, "Don't let me down, please," into her microphone.

It was YN's preferred pizza, which surprised her. As she crouches next to the fan, YN exclaims, "You are now my favorite person ever, I love you so much." — "You certainly made her happy, I suppose. Sincerely, I believed she would eventually cut off my head." Harry says as he squats down next to YN and receives snarling looks in return.

"Harry, I hate you so much." She pushes him in a playful manner until he falls to his back, at which point she turns to face the fan while grinning widely. — "You have my undying love. I adore you. Because of you, dinner is served!"

"Speaking of Adore You," Harry teases into his microphone as he motions for YN to stand, the upbeat instrumental playing through the speakers.

YN was spotted eating pizza while seated close to her and Harry's band.

iuploadtweetsaboutynrryonig

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celebnews

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celebnews "Y'wanna do it with me?" -- "Pass. I don't want to barf out the pizza I just ate. And besides, you're not even drinking it with beer!" -- "Well, this is a family show, is it not?" YN LN and Harry Styles on doing a shoey at their concert at Perth.

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username ITS THE WAY YN'S FACE LOOKED LIKE WHEN HE PUT HIS SHOE BACK ON 💀

username he drank it out of a GUCCI SNEAKER

username SOMEONE SEDATE ME RN

username yn just munching on her food in the back while harry does all of these 😭

username "this is one of the most disgusting traditions" -- "THEN DON'T DO IT" I LOVE YN SM LMFAOO

username yn shaking her head in disappointment like a mother for him doing it and him not doing it right 😭

username I JUST WOKE UP HES DOING A SHOEY??

ynrry

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ynrry more of ynrry tonight at perth!

harrystyles

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harrystyles Love On Tour. Perth. February. 2023.

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username WE MISSED YOU BOOOTHH

username had the time of my life im so thankful

username i miss you already

yourinstagram this is the face of someone who DROPPED A SLICE OF MY PIZZA ON THE FLOOR.

harrystyles I SAID I WAS SORRY

username CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU AGAINN

username 2023ynrry is such a sight to see

username LOVE LVOE LOVE

username SOMEONE POST A VIDEO OF THE SHOEY PLEASE

yourinstagram

liked by dualipa, chrisevans, and 2,132,001 others

yourinstagram taught this man how to use a phone once, and he can't let go of it. PERTH I LOVE YOU

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username the thought of yn teaching harry makes me giggle a bit

username i barely see this man holding a phone this is a rare sight

username I'M GLAD YOU ENJOYED THE PIZZA !

yourinstagram i love you i love you i love you

username tonight felt like a dream omg

username IM COMING TO SEE YOU TWO AGAIN SOOOOON

username the best duo in the whole universe no one can tell me otherwise

yourinstagram via ig story

#harry styles fake instagram #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic #harry styles story #harry styles writing #harry styles au #harry styles one shot #harry styles fake ig #harry styles instagram blurb #harry styles blurb #harry styles x reader #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles headcanon #harry styles x you #harry styles instagram au #HS + Y/I #jadeittic

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tu-es-gegg · 5 months

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i wish charlie uploaded the end of purgatory vod so i can rewatch that moment in teh bunker where qslime just stands there looking at all the others and them trying to get to their eggs

like, he's aimless, he does care about the kids at least a little bit but he's not that close to them. because none of the kids are his daughter, so he's not clawing at the barrier blocks to get to them. they already have more dedicated parents, caretakers, guardians to care more about them and do a better job than he can do

all the meanwhile the other lonely player in the boat as him is qmaxo, announcing he has a bomb, he unlike slime he managed to find at least a driving purpose to escape the island, his grief though painful, fueled his dedication to found the theory bros and work on every which way to fight back. he's the only proactive one out of the two.

its like a moment he just stands on his own for like a moment, looking around, maybe trying to figure otu exactly whats going on by observing quietly, but it still feels sad to see him jsut stand in the center on his own while most of the rest stand near their kids.

it hammers home how at the end of the day, he wasnt fighting through purgatory at the possibility to save the kids, he's surviving to get to the end of it all and go back to (code)flippa, he will fight for hsi friends but it still hurts when all his friends still in a way are parents and he's without flippa again. that moment is a repeat of the time before the eggs went missing, when all the parents were happy with their eggs and he cant relate to that joyous feeling of being a parent with them anymore.

#sorry this has been stuck in ym head for days #qsmp #qsmp slimecicle #txt post

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deerlottie · 1 month

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omg please tell me ur thoughts abt big sister lottie 🥹 can’t stop thinking abt her

this was so cute to do :( kind of all over the place but!!!!!!!!!

she's like 5 years older than you and was the most excited child ever to hear that she was gonna get a new sibling ^_^

talking to your mom's belly and saying how she cant wait to meet you :(((( cried for hours after your mom said you couldn't come home right away and demanded she sleep in the nurseries with you 😭

slight angst but thinking of her watching you in the bassinet while ur moms 'busy' downstairs and she's shaking the rattle at you to get u to stop crying :(

OHH!!!!!! lottie being elementary school friends with the rest of the yjs and whenever they'd sleepover she'd LOVE showing her baby sibling off ☹️☹️☹️ nat messing with you and trying to get you to say "poop" or the worst bad word ever... "frick."

timeskip because i cant think of anything else rn

the older you get, the less you see of your parents

by the time ur like 10, lottie's practically your mom now. she doesnt want you to be sad so she always tells you that "mom and dad are just busy building you the coolest house ever!!!! with robot maids and a slide and all you can eat pizza!!!"

making you breakfast for school :3 literally whatever you ask for, she'll make. she learned how to cook just for you. and how to drive. usually the butlers would take you, but you said you hate it and miss when mom would do it, so she learned like a year early so she could drive you :(

big sister lottie picking you up from elementary and ur so intimated by her cool friends that you barely remember. (jackie is the aunt that's ALWAYSSS like "remember me, kid? i made you eat sand that one time." (u were like 4))

oh she'd for sure play roblox, club penguin, msp with you whenever you want...buys you all the robux in the world too like ur avatar is PIMPED out

bullies kids with you and rps in brookhaven

idk jsut thinking of playing guitar hero with her :3

buying u a proper laptop so you can play poptropica without ur knees burning up

teaching u how to play soccer because she's ur big sister and u wanna be just like her :(( threatens coach ben to let you on the team when you get into high school 🤭

going to ur soccer games when you were younger :((((((((((((((((( u were always sad mom and dad werent there but lottie's there cheering you on and taking you out for ice cream after

idkkkk she'd just be the best sister everrrr :( always there for you to listen or talk to and when ur parents try to get back in ur life for some reason, she's there to protect you and yell at them for never being there for you. they weren't even at ur middle school graduation and she had to skip class to take you

she loves u so much she'd genuinely kill someone for you ☹️

#lottie matthews thoughts 💭

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lincolnmkicks · 2 years

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more hero is larks daughter ramblings and predictions under the cut spoilers for s2 of dndads!!!! also this was like. at 1am. so any typos or anything are just bc i was soup brained sorry ;;

people forgetting hero exists drive me crazy. i cannot see a way that norm is actually larks son unless hero was born out of wedlock (bc i think they mention explicitly lark slept with rebecca the night before sparrow married her???? or smth??? let me go back. OKAY WENT BACK AND HOLY SHIT apparently lark just only now told sparrow abt fucking rebecca and larks like “oh i knew but it was too awkward to talk about so i let it slide :)” and lark explicitly states he fucked rebecca while shr was engaged to sparrow) which. idk i feel like. sparrow is so desperate for normality would he really not jsut. marry rebecca the second he realizes shes pregnant with hero?

so to me. i think narratively my prediction. if we go with the hero is larks kid theory. and not scary is larks kid. is that. so hero was an unexpected baby. hero wasnt intentional. maybe she was born on a day that made it plausible she was either of their kid. sparrow, never quite sure and never able to BE sure bc he and lark r twins obv. named hero. well hero incthe most petty move EVER. a constant reminder of what lark Did. not just sleeping with his wife but a reminder of the unsung hero needed to release the doodler. hero is not just a reminder of larks guilt snd mistakes. shes a reminder of *henry*. and maybe that inadvertently makes sparrow distant from her as well. i dont know which way sparrows relationship with henry went. part of me wonders if maybe lark was closer wjth mercedes and sparrow was closer with henry. who knows. im ramblings and off topic but anyway.

maybe sparrows distant with hero bdcause shes not his daughter. becaude he *knows*, potentially, she might Not be his. and sparrow doesn’t want that because thats not *normal* its not *conventional*. this also explains him marrying centrist rebecca (does not explain what wa sin her pussy to make lark wanna hit it too if im correct abt him being closer to mercedes. maybe im off and he was closer to autumn. idk). maybe hero already felt eldest daughter syndrome, compounded by the fact that her birth dad feels shame and guilt not just bc of her name and the circumstances of her brith but also bc he just doesnt feel worthy of bejng a father. arms length and all that.

and so. NORMAL. normal is guaranteed sparrows son now. in this version of events. and its perfect now its fine because normal is his normal is his son and not larks. sparrow is happy. forget about hero she doesnt count because shes mayeb not his. forget her. and then normal isnt. normal. hes weird. he wears a mascot suit all tbe time. he doesnt realize people laugh at him not with him. and thats not okay. thats wrong. thats Out of the Ordinary that interrupts the daily flow and its JJST BARRY AGAIN. its JUST barry but maybe even WORSE. because barry believed his son superior. sparrow thinks his son is lesser.

sparrow likes his son fine but hes not proud of him. he doesnt wanna show him off. LARK. though. uncle lark is Everytbing. theres no shame attached to normal liek there js to hero. hero’s his brith child and hed mess it up but hey. he cant do worse to normal than sparrow has. and maybe lark sees a bit of himself in norm. sees a kid who wasnt accepted by his father. who wasnt as Respected because sparrow was a love wolf and lark wasnt. lark looks at normal and can see him get crushed under a giant pyramid. lark looks at normal and worries hed be the next lord of chaos.

so lark. co parents. he cares for norm. he pretends fo be his brother to apologize for the bullshit he said. he does—in his fucked up, traumatized way—his best to prepare norm for things he might experience. theres no shame attached to norm like there is hero because hero’s birth almost ruined sparrow. ruined his perfect life with hsi perfect wife. so lark can step up when sparrow. cant. or doesnt. lark supports norm. maybe to make up for whst he cant do for hid actual daughter.

also im biased but i like lark having a daughter a lot. in a show where everyone has sons ofc the one who has a daughter (a BIRTH daughter, too, so still a first even if i love terry and scary) is LARK. fhats prob why i prefer lark ebing hero or scarys dad to norms. anyways.

where does that leave hero? who doesnt have sparrows adoration and attention because she might not be his. who doesnt have larks because she MIGHT be.

well…………………. maybe scary breaks free from willy’s manipulation. maybe willy needs somebody to help him pull the strings from his side. maybe willy can step up not for taylor, but for somebody else. somebody who has TWO male adults in her life who push her aside for her baby brother. and willy really needs daddy magic. so maybe. maybe just maybe.

willy finds an unsung hero in a different way.

#dndads #dungeons and daddies #dndads spoilers #lark oak #sparrow oak #normal oak #hero oak

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evansbby · 1 year

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In poyt 4, i have to know, even if they never made up or omega never forgave him and didnt adore him anymore, would he still have kept her? I imagine things wouldve taken a dark turn. Maybe a little dark AU drabble? Wink wink ;) I imagine he wouldve really locked her up in his room and anywhere he goes, she's literally stuck to his side. And he cant risk anyone making her fall in love with him so he's double paranoid and double protective and he just lashes out at everyone at every minute. I imegine he goes dark and all he'll think about is losing her, obsessing over her. And shes so numb she barely registers anything anymore. And at some point steve jsut starts doing the wildest shit to see what will get her reaction. Hurting himself,hurting others to the points he is arrested just to see her bail him out (though the lawyers would keep that record clean) Maybe he'd threaten to drink until he's an angry drunk, or take drugs. Maybe even cheat again. HAHAHHA I FEEELLLLL EVILLLL

Spot on! He would’ve gone crazy and paranoid!We already got a taste of this in poyt 4, when he was accusing her of cheating on him with Sam 😭 and he’d get even more obsessed, literally not letting her out of his sight EVER. And he’d be so confused inside his own head, half the time trying to win her over by buying her expensive gifts and she’d just stare at him blankly and then he’d get mad and lash out at her 😭

Oh and I can totally imagine him turning to alcohol and drinking and being reckless jus to get her attention and make her care for him again! Bestie this is sooo interesting bc I never thought of it this way! Steve getting drunk off his ass, speeding while he drives home, getting in a minor accident, spending the night in jail, yelling at omega to just talk to him and go back to the way she was, threatening to kill himslef if she didn’t go back to being how she was 💀 a lot of crying and throwing up and just being super super dark 😭😭😭 I can totally imagine it!

#tw suicide #anon #poyt ask

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ganondoodle · 7 months

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random thought about the memory system

a big difference between why botws memories worked so well but totks didnt is mainly bc in botw, there wasnt that much plot, you kinda knew what was up by the time you left the tutorial, all memories serve you just as well as link, sending you around a hyrule you dont know, the few scenes of main characters do a good job of giving you an idea of who they are, but the majority is focused on zelda and link, why she acted to cold to him at first and later became friends, the characterization being not jsut in memories but also in how people remember them, their diary etc, when you meet their ghosts theres a familiarity to how they talk to you, they know and care about you, its like giving you late friend one last visit; getting memories out of order really doesnt hurt that characterization and overall it really just serves to flesh out the past and what made this world the way you see it now but mainly it gives you characters

in totk, its ... the main plot driving thing, you are here for the story now more than the world bc you know the world already, besides the sages stuff (that isnt much either besides some legends that apprently were always a thing but never popped up until now), its basically the entire plot and it all hinges on it, its trying to be both plot and character introduction AND characterization, which it simply cant do; we already know zelda and what shes like, but its like the game itself doesnt know what to do with her now, she doesnt do anything, she stands around listenign to strangers talk, whenever she says anything shes dismissed or it simply doesnt matter, the most she does is go around to faceless and nameless sages of old we dont know nor care about in a damn near copy paste scene begging them to help link of the far future somehow even tho they really have no reason to and then she swallows a stone bc she has literally no other choice; fleshing out the past doesnt work either bc this past is so far removed from anything of the world and people you know that theres simply no meaningful connection to make you really care, there are no characters alive that knew the people of old ...except mineru and rauru are still there, but then dont tell you shit, theres so much you dont know about them, their world or history and they dont tell you anything bc *gestures vaguely* ?? even ganondorf only says some standard villain stuff that tells us pretty much nothing about him nor rauru, no one in your time asking you who the hell that ghost powered robot is? no she sits in her robot somewhere deep underground (how does she even get out of there at the end, she needed you to drive her around to her own temple after all) given how straight up obsessed hyrules entire population is with sonau stuff they sure dont do anything with a literal person from that time and then at the end she jsut goes poof, welp, guess we will never, sure, fine keep your secrects; getting the memories out of order destroys literally any kind of story that was there, like it wasnt predicatble from like memory 3 to where it would go (predicable can be good but in this case its boring as hell) anyway

.. theres more i could talk about but this is already longer than intended and i want to do other things but this with my evening, you probably heard most of my problems with this game in my rants by now anyway

#ganondoodles talks #ganondoodles rants #zelda #totk #i dont quite know why i suddendly wanted to mention this #also too tired to add my equally long tag rants lol

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caruliaa · 2 years

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girls when the world around them cant decide if it thinks freedom comes from adulthood or childhood but you never had a free childhood and in order to earn your freedom as an adult youre going to have to give up your other freedoms and you are never going to win .

#its either stay trapped in this stupid house or become trapped in a stupid job. and im probalby never even going to learn to drive #its not fucking fair everyone else gets to learn how to drive and go out with their friends and fucking.#jesus christ the main thing everyone talks about with uni is how great of an experince it was with getting to fucking know people #and getting to have freedom by moving out but im probalby never even going to go #because even if i fucking do i wont be able to move out or have any personal freedom or even be able to socialize and make friends there #and then what i somehow manage to move out and then i spend forvever barly scraping by #probably not even able to get a job of any kinds bc not only have i not gone to uni i also cant even drive #im sorry ik im kinda spiralling idek whats happening like.#i was so hopeful aobut moving out for a a while there but now im just suddenlyy not #and its jsut not fair everything so scary #and everyone is always gong to have thier parents but i just dont #its just not fair i want to be able to be a proper adult but i never even got to be a proper teenager or a proper kid #im just so sick of everything #and i prob wont have the time or ability bc of being so busy with working to actually like. make any friends anywere #or actually do anything. whatever.#idk im sorry im just suddenly so. idk . im sorry #vent #flappy rambles

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gayspock · 4 months

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ok 1 menty b for me

i dont know. i think its just always been so alienating. i think theres something wrong with me and its unfixable. and sometimes, if i cant have anything else, i just want at least the fucking chance to express that without people thinking even less of me. and ik in reality nobody even gaf or sees me. but i also know know that if they did, 9times out fo 10 people would be rolling their eyes. whatever. idk. i feel so lonely and i dont think im ever not going to be lonely and its never going to get better because even when given the resources, the opportunities i just can never manage . i just cant . i swear i try . but every single time. my whole fucking life . i just walk away from everything with even less, it feels like. and its getting so much harderand harder. and i dont know how to express it liek ... i fucking feel myself SEETHE as ppl keep insisting "theres still a chance! there's still hope!" like sure bro. but i dont want to fucking keep living my life along the fucking asymptote of getting consistently closer to dying alone but "haha technically its not a certainty" and . like theres just something so fucking repulsive about me and i just cant seem to fix it no matter what. and im so exhausted all the time. and i genuinely dont think theres any way out of that . i go to work and i come home so burnt out and tired. and people are nice there but i dont think i can really connect with anyone . i just cant seem to get close to people . and i dont have it within me to meet anyone else because im so fucking tired all of the time .

and even if i did and i mustered all the energy and spent all the little time i had left in the world i dont think theyd have time for me. not just bc nobody in their 20s does but also because i dont know . it just never seems to work . and i cant do it again where i try to invest every little piece of me into it when its jsut always left me fucking miserable and pathetic. bro do you know what i mean. not to be 16 and lame as shit still. i feel like im always the idiot ppl take pity on at best . i dont think ive ever been real to anybody. like alwaysssssss...... and even now i feel like every time I HAVE existed within circles of others. its literally 10 times out of 10 just constantly fighting to be included and seen as someone whos not a fucking joke and i just feel like such a fucking . loser for caring so much about it when. REALISTICALLY. pretty much all the people ive met in life will have forgotten i exist. and ok. ok. i just dont think ... like its not like some trait within me right like ... im not As melodramatic to be like oh . oh theres an actual innate trait within me thats activated and stops people liking me. just. the contrary like. i just think theres nothing within me to actually like . or to gravitate towards. so likeyeah sure . that makes sense. why WOULD you want to bother with someone whos just kinda hollow or whatever.. something something or other. and i kind of wish i was more resilient about tht. but i jsut . i guess as is a Guy of that Nature, its just ... im trying to fucking not fucking spiral but i just feel myself fucking filling up with fucking . miserable SHITTY bile or whatever because i just wish i felt normal or whatever. its such a fucking human fucking thing that other people can MANAGE. but i cant . its so so fucking hard and i cant do it and i cant handle it. and i just feel so angry sometimes anyways . bc i hate it . and i keep trying bc i wanna make peace with it because i know theres no out . like ive long since given up on ever thinking its going to work out . because nothing fucking helps but makes it so much worse . anyways. i dont know. but i dont know bro. it drives me fucking insane when people always spout some bs about how "haha everyone has someone! everyone will find someone! like no they dont no they wont . its so .. so much more isolating. or like "EVERYONEEE feels lonely sometimes" like HOW does that help. HOW. and it makes it so MUCH FUCKING WORSEEEE when people tell you about how lonely they are too!!! like cool . i dont have a chance then. sorry i know thats such a bitter bitch thing to say. but idk if it rlly matters like ... at the end of the day idc when ppl have partners. or people they talk to. family who loves them. and youre still lonely. cool. thank you for letting me know, dude. go back to the people who will look out for you and love you whilst i sit in the dark and not speak to anyone for weeks whilst not a single person would even notice im gone .

or like. bro. i dont think a single person has taken me seriously for long enough to ever fucking like me or hold me in enough regard to like... want to talk to me again nevermind like be with me in a certain sense so i jsut. i dont know. sits alone. every fucking day for years maybe. i dont know. i feel so fucking sad and angry knowing deep down that i can know all this and know its true but even then . i cant even have that . people wont even take THAT part of me seriouslyand think im just some fucking idiot whos not even trying. when i really reallyhave but its just so... worthless it feels like . it feels like im never getting anywhere and everyone thinks i just gave up when i didnt. and i dont know. thar makes it sound like people actually see me and really are laughing or something when i dont think its nearly that much. i think its like oh people see me make that as a snap judgement and i fall out of existence again. and i dont know. it shouldnt matter but i feel so fucking strung out and exist between these instances only and idk. idk bro. im trying to be okay with it. but as im getting older i just feel like theres so many more things that are revealing themselves as worse and worse. and im going crazy. im going crazzzzzzyyyy . whatever . insert the mental breakdown gifs . the funny ones where those guys aremoving really fast

#egg.txt

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isekaisyouwithmyforearmlaser · 10 days

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its just so not fair. like im over self pitying at this point cause its just the nature of all things. and being sad about it isnt going to fix it. but i take in my moms kid and i send basically half of all the money i eanr to her to help her and its not enough, my boss at my sales job makes a bar work meeting mandatory and corners me and steals my phone and threatens me, i become a cna but in order to make close to what i was making i have to work doordash in the mornings and cna job at night, my little sisters grades start slipping cause im working too much to really be there for her, then my car breaks down and im unable to get my little sister to school and back, unable to work in the mornings which is half mu income currently and the only person who can help me is my grandmother whose already pushing her age and its supposed to be me looking after her but she said shed come stay with me to help drive me around but even then she cant be here friday saturday and sunday so im gonna have to walk 2 1/2 hours home everyday, all my dad says in response to this is that hes too depressed to deal with it. like as if i didnt inherent his fucking mentally ill genes and my mom. and my mom has the gall, after i tell her about our situation, to ask me.to buy her groceries. im jsut so mad. im so mad. im so insanely mad because the last thing i will ever do is be homeless again. i just hate that im becoming like my mother and i dont want my little sister to habe to live like.how i used to have to. BUT also on a lighter note. imagine my calves after all this walking... hoooo boy

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hirik0 · 5 months

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False Reality Part 2

Soap/Ghost, SiFi AU

When Ghost is opeingin his eyes again for the secound time this day, hes blinded by brithe hospital eyes. He makes a displeased sound holding one of his hands in front of his eyes. NExt to him someone is moving. "Simon, how your feeling?", a female soundig voice is asking him and why is he thinking he must imagening this voice? He moves his head and hes lookig at his mother Helena Riley. HE blinks a few times, while tears are filling his eyes, why is he sad this just dont make sence. Its his mum he just saw her last sunday for family dinner right? RIGHT?!? "What happened?", he ask confused. "Price said you had a really bad migraine when you spoke over the phone, he also said your confused about living here in London. I had to let the EMTS in", his mother sound woried and tears are gathering in her eyes and he hates this. "Yeah, I dont know, just have a wiered feeling, maybe i dreamed bad and thats why im confused", he says to sooth his mother worry. "Of course sunshine, I will get a nurse yes", Helena says before leaving the room. Sunshine, why the fuck is she calling him sunshine? His mum only ever told him Simon his hole life hes sure of that. His mum returns with a nurse and a young Doctor. Ghost has to press his teath together to not call the Doctor Gaz and ask him what he is doing here. "Im Dr. Garrick", the young Doctor is intrudusing himself and Ghost acts like he in fact dont know Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick. Jsut the Gaz in his memorys is in the military. "We did a CT scan and MRI of your brain and we found nothing. He dont know where the headache was coming from but it for sure was not a migraine. The good news is also no tumor. Just i dont no what happend right before you passed out?", Gaz ask taking a pan in his hand his left hand, Ghost notices Gaz is right handed hes pretty sure about this. But does it really matter. "I was on the phone with my boss John Price and I dont know for some reason I thought i dont live on earth, but that clearly cant be right", Ghost explains feeling stupid. "I mean the mars colonie from Elon Musk failed after just 5 years and the only other posibility is the moon base, and Im sure your not an astronaut", Gaz says still writting down eveythink Ghost said. For some reason Ghost has the feeling failed is an understament and that after Elon Musk got killed at the mars revolution the colonie recovered really fast, but he keeps that for himself. "Well you can go home Mr. Riley, we cant do anything for you, besides making sure you get some sick days", Gaz says with his big familier smile. "Thanks... Doc", He nearly called Gaz Sergeant what the fuck.

His mum drives him home looking worried. "You are sure you dont want to stay in your old room, sunshine?", she asks for the 5th time. "Yes mum its fine, if thinks get worse i will call you", he ansered for the 5th time. "You sure you can come to dinner on Thursday?" "Yes, Mum of course its with Joes girlfriend and her dad, right", Ghost says confused why he knows this. "Yes, Emma MacTavish and her dad John, the mum sadly past away. Cant imagine to raise you both with out your dad." Ghost bites his toungh to not say they infact would be better off with out their loser father but he has the feeling this will upset his mother. He dont want to upset his mother, he hates when she is upset. He also has the feeling that Emma is Soaps youngest niece and not his daughter. "What is Mr. MacTavish doing for work again?", Ghost ask nearly saying Soap, feeling wired to call Soap Mr. MacTavish having the feeling Soap would tell him thats his dad. "His Joes chemestry teacher, Simon do you even listend when Joe told us for 3 months how cool the new chemestry teacher is?" "I maybe turend my brain of becasue he repeaded the same thinks over and over again", Ghost lies through his teeth. Chemestry teacher oddly makes sense to him, knowing that Soap is good in chemestry for other reasons then beeing a teacher. His mum is smiling at this. "Well, it was that or him just talking about Emma, for 3 months i understand. He just like Tommy was with Beth at the beginning. Ghost start feeling sad having knowing that he infact didnt know this. He knows that Tommy is loving Beth with all he got, but for some reason he dont know he talked about nothing but Beth for months. Because he was not at home, why was he not at home? They reach Simons apartment building and Ghost kisses his mother on the cheek as a thank you. He gets in the building he enters his code the 4th November the day... the day its an important date to him he knows that but why? Was important thing happend on the 4th November?

He opens the door to his appartment, walking straight in to the living room he didnt inspected yet. Like in the bedroom, this room feels to big for just one person. He loves the wall with books shelves, the sofa looks comfortable, the tv looks like a ancient relict to him, tvs got replaced 20 years before smartphons. It looks to lived in, he also hates the open kitchen, but it's what he has to work with. He looks through all the drawers till he finds a pair of scissors. Time to fix his hair, while he walks to the bathroom he sees photos of him having a man bun but his brain tells him this is against regulations, he just dont know what regulations. He stands in front of the giant mirror and start cutting away big parts of his hair, till he has short easy to maintain miltary style hair cut. He has the urge to shave the sites down more but he thinks that it's maybe to much change for his mum. He's also pleasantly suprised that the cut dont look like a 5 year old that cut their own hair, the feeling of him cutting his hair regularly on his own is popping up in his head. He cleans the scissor before returning it to the kitchen. He inspects the fridge and its full. There are fruits he oddly only knows from books in a fruit bowl. To his horror he don't find any bourbon, but lots of whine and the worst he sees a coffee maschien and he has no tea. He takes a apple out of the bowl, before he goes to the last room in the appartement. It's a small office and he instantly feels the need to move his bedroom in here. He nearly drops the apple when he sees the law degree with his name on right behinde the desk. Hes a lawyer? If Price is his boss does that mean PRICE is also a lawyer? Guess instead of resting he needs to catch up on British law... and how your supost to follow it. Why does he has the feeling he broke a lot of laws in the past? He laughs at the conflicting feeling of him being a lawyer and him not haven follow a law atleast his hole adult life.

Supect: Simon Riley, Human space marine

Days in simulation: 4 standard galactic days

Time till ascending: 8 standart galactic days

Today he would meet Soap and for some reason that makes him really nervous. The last few days he looked at his work suprised that he understood everything. He is up to date with all his cases, he's ready for court on Monday and at the same time he feels like a big imposter. He watched some earth TV, oddly already knowing the plot of most movies and series even if said series is allegedly just premiereing. Sometimes thinking about how Gaz would react to sertain plots and jokes. The music even if it's allegedly just released feel like they are old and should not be at the top 100 charts. He's questioning if everything is in fact okay with his brain since he passed out 3 days ago. He just showered and is now standing in front of his dresser. The lack of black cloths is the biggest pain in his the ass. Every shirt being in a light colour he has to dig in there every fucking day to find some dark colours. He choose a dark green button up and black dress pants, no lack of these at least. He has the need to cover up atleast the lower half of his face. He also every morning is looking for something to blacken the skin around his eyes being iritated ever time he dont find it. Why does he has this need to hide his face? He talks with nobody over this not wanting to worry them or end up in the hospital again. He also start to work out really iritate by the limits his body is setting him, feeling like he is suposed to be able to do more.

He stands at the front door of Beth's and Tommys house still unsure why he even knows the address. The same feeling he had with his mom is also here. As if Beth, his mom, Tommy and Joseph are all supost to be dead. He rings the bell and Beth is opening the door with a big smile that turns in to confusion. "Did you cut your hair Simon?", she asks confused. "Yes." "But why the man bun was really a good look on you", Beth say while letting her brother in law in. "Just didn't liked it anymore." Beth is narrow her eyes before slowly nodding in understanding. "I get it long hair is a pain to take care of, looks good Simon just suprised." Footsteps are stomping down the stairs and a teenage Joseph is looking around the corner disappointed to see his uncle instead of his girlfriend. "Hi Joe", Ghost just greats. "Hi uncle Si", he says before disappearing to his room again. "Teenager", Beth sighs fondly. The adults move to the living room. His mother and Tommy sitting on the couch talking about something. "Si", Tommy says with a big smile that makes Ghost heart arch. "Tommy, good to see you." He supresses the need to hug him, clearly he sees Tommy on a regular basis. "A shame that Dad, cant be here", Tommy sees and Ghost blood frezzes in his veins. A shame? A shame, this man better never comes near them ever again. "You okey sunshine?", his mom ask seeing his for her very unusal face expression. He slipped from Simon to the Ghost something his family just never saw. He need to take several deep breaths before he can answer his mum question getting concernt looks from everyone in the livingroom. Hes rescued from an answer by the doorbell.

Joe is sprinting down the stairs, its only one person that can ring with all his family downstairs. Emma and Mr MacTavish. He nearly falls in his haste and honstely the scene is mealting the cold rage inside of Ghost. Joe pulls the door open probably with a big smile. "Hey", he says a bit arkward and his mum mutters while shaking her head: "Just like his dad." "Hey, Joe", a girl is answering a her smile clearly can be heared in her voice. "Mr MacTavish", Joe greets his teacher after hugging his girlfriend. Emma MacTavish has the same big, lightening ther room up smile as Soap, but her Hair is red instead of brown, probably from her mother. She goes Joespeh nearly to his chin, perfect to rest the head on when you hug. Soap steps in and his long hair instead of a stupid mohawk is iritating the shit out of Ghost. Also Soap is way to tiny, no visibel bulk at all. Soap has shoulder long hair, just like Ghost before he cut his, he imgine its put up in class but at the moment its down. He has the same blue eyes he rembers from somewhere and this smile that punches the air out of Ghost chest. Thank fuck he dont blushes, because his mum will likely notice something early enough. "Well you know my parents and than is my nana Helena Riley and my uncel Simon", Joeseph intedudec the two. John heard is skipping a beat when he looks in Ghost brown eye the fuck he will do falling on love with the uncel of his daugthers boyfriend. Emma will probably never forgive him that.

They sit at the diner table the adult Rileys one onside and Joseph and the MacTavishs on the other. Beth cooked a vegetarian deep dish to the displeasement of Ghost with fucking eggplant in it. So while everyone is kinda busy talking with each other he picks the offensive plant out of his food. "Joe told us your really in to music from the 2000s", Beth says making Ghost turn in the conversation again. "I had to listen to a lot of it for a essay and it stucked", Emma says clearly exited about the topic. "What's your favourite song?, Helena asks intresstet. Lady Gagas Bad Romance Ghost thinks being so suprised about this knowledge he accidentally eats a piece of eggplant. "Bad Romance form Lady Gaga", Emma answers. "I never heard this song I think", Helena likes listens to older music. "I can send you my playlist Mrs Riley", Emma offers. "Call me Helena or Nana dear and that sounds lovely." "I think you also would like Karma from Taylor Swift", Emma says while inspecting her food also picking out the eggplant. "Oh what's the song about?", Helena ask intresstet. "That if you do good things Karma will make sure good things happen to you and the people you care for", Ghost answers automatically getting the attention of the hole table. "That sound lovely", his mother says with a smile on her face. "Could not have said it better", Emma says smiling. It's because that are you word Ghost thinks while drinking from his water glass. They go on to the dessert that are deffently made by his mom. Littel lemon tarts, Simons favourite. "So how is living with and I quote: Londons best and hottest lawyer", Soap asks as a joke getting a drop it look from Ghost and a emberest look from his daughter. "We heared thats technically illegal a lot", Tommy says punishing Ghost shoulder playfull. "It's because you always ask me oddly specifically if scenario x would be illegal which it is 90% of the time. The other 10% is it will be if you get caught", Ghost says while jabbing his elbow in Tommys site. "No disgusion of Law at diner", Beth reminds them annoyed. "Well technically diner is over Mum, dessert is not diner you told me that a lot", Joseph says imitating Ghost lawyer talk. Ghost just nods proudly using the own words against someone is important in law, while Tommy takes a big sip of his wine to not laught. Helena and Emma are chewing their tart suspiciously long. John has to take a deep breath to not laugh. "Sometimes as you know Joseph Riley diner has more then one course like today and then dessert is infact part of diner. So no law questions", Beth says stern. Joseph opens his mouth to say disagree and desites last second to say something else. "Emma also want to be a lawyer." "Oh really?" Ghost ask intresstetto his knowledge Emma wants to specialise as a alienspecies vetenarian. "Mum was the best family lawyer in Glasgow and I want to step on her foot steps", Emma says with a shining in her eyes like Soap when he is allowed to blow up something. "Family law is hard but important", Ghost just says getting a site eye from Beth. They change subjects after this till the last piece of dessert is eaten.

The teenager are sitting on the couch while the adults still talk at the diner table. "Well I thought Joe will never stop talking about Emma the whole school year, he hardly talks about anything else", Beth says a bit tipsy from the whine. "Mum!", Joseph protest from the couch. "Ah same here a have a check list of thinks Joseph Riley does by now", Soaps says loudly over the protest of his daughter. "DAD!", Emma says as a warning a familiar look of challenge in her eyes, that Ghost know all to well from his Soap. "Don't worry bumblebee I will keep the really embarrassing stuff for another time so that Beth can coordinate with storys about Joseph", Soap jokes and it clearly the wrong answer because Emma is narrowing her eyes pulling her lower lip on while thinking about a response. Ghost just smiles hearing that Soap uses the same nickname for daughter Emma as for niece Emma. "Well atleast I don't got called Soap by everyone because I blow up a soap dispenser at uni Dad", Emma answers clearly not pleased with her dad's answer. It seams that Soap is still Soap after all even as a teacher instead of... God he will figure that one out later. "Was an accident and technically not my fault", Soap protests. "Oh so what happened then?", Ghost asks with a raised eyebrow looking Soap directly in the eyes for the first time. Soap feels how his heart is about to jump out his chest, his hands geting sweaty and how his ears are getting warm, all just because Simon Riley is giving him his full attention. Fucking hell, he had his fair share of hot parents as a teacher but Simon Riley will be the death of him. "Well...", he starts never ever he had the problem to tell this story before, its likely because he's a lawyer and not because he's hot Soap lies to himself. "We tested a chemical reaction and I maybe put a bit to much of it in because I was distracted and then the dispenser exploded." "So it was your fault", Ghost concludes while shaking his head and Soap has to repress the urge to just agree with him. "No, I was distracted by a fellow student and he is,atleast half the reason it happened." "And still they only called you Soap." Holy fucking shit the way he says Soap is sending shivers down his spine. He hated this nick name but when Simon Riley says it it sounds like so good he wants to fall down on his knees. He's lucky he sits because he maybe would have done it embarrassing his daughter in front of Josephs family.

#call of duty #simon ghost riley #ghostsoap

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