#i just had an oh shit fuck moment

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

#oh wow... #i just had an oh shit fuck moment #wow #i usually complain about the one therapist i had in my entire life and how she wouldn't just listen to what i was saying #if it didn't fit her textbook definition of whatever she was thinking at the time #and how i talked to her about my anxiety and how that made me feel and she would only focus on how i acted #so the example i gave her was the one time i went into a shop to buy something by myself #because my mom didn't want to go in for me and arguing with my mom in front of the shop in public and then inevitably have to #go in myself either way was way worse to me #because of the embarrassement of arguing in public. the fact that my mom was gonna spend the entire walk home telling me how i have to #''just suck it up and learn and just overcome my anxiety because i don't have a problem'' or whatever #and then having to go into the shop where the lady had been watching me from inside the entire time how i clearly didn't want to go in #and possibly be even more awkward with teary eyes because of the anxiety and awkwardness i already bring to the table any day... #all of those things that were going inside my head were trumped by the fact that i did go in and did buy what i needed #although my heart was coming out of my chest the entire time... all that didn't matter to my therapist because in her words: #''if you had anxiety. you simply wouldn't have gone in'' #which is ridiculous #but anyways... i just had an epiphany... that was masking wasn't it? #forcing myself to do something that brings me major discomfort to make my mother and the shop lady not judge me? #pretend i'm a normal human being just doing normal things instead of someone who's about to have a heart attack buying embroidery thread? #panicking the entire time because i wasn't prepeared and hadn't scripted the entire transaction in my head? #yet still going in and putting on my ''normal person'' mask to try to seem like i wasn't just dying seconds ago (and still was)? #isn't that literally what masking is?! #and the ''autism specialist'' ass therapist was like ''if you did it then you don't have a problem'' #when i'm literally telling her how much of a problem it actually WAS?! #you know what's the best part about all this #that when i told my mom after i left that therapist that she didn't listen to me because [insert everything above] #my mom's response was ''well sometimes therapist will say things that you don't want to hear but you have to accept them''.... #same woman who's always saying how much she hates therapists because they ''will say whatever and pretend they know shit'' #ok so it's only The Truth when I tell you it isn't...

[fujii-draws]

OKAY! Chatot rant in tags below! Read at your own discretion.

#okay starting from the beginning of where ppl usually dislike him. apple woods chapter. #he doesn’t give hero/partner the CHANCE to explain themselves despite them being relatively good recruits up until that point. #and that legit might be my only gripe with that chapter bc!!! stories need conflict! I LIKE the conflict in apple woods!!! #hero and partner being punished so something they didn’t do! #the misunderstanding! how team skull (Skuntank) actually outplays the main duo with a clever yet rotten trick. I LOVE that it segways into- #one of the more sweeter scenes of guild members looking out for eachother. I LIKE APPLE WOODS CONFLICT. #but chatot just. not giving them a chance. is so dumb. #I’d personally fix this by having a lil montage of hero/partner fucking up on jobs. A LOT. and chatot giving them a pass every time. #and let the perfect apple incident BE the one where he puts his foot down and doesn’t listen to them. bc he’d given them loads of chances. #and doesn’t want to hear any excuse. #but yeah. I legit dont mind him during that chapter except for that really stupid and frustrating moment. #NOW. CHAPTER 17. #UGGGGHHH WHERE DO I BEGIN #Him not believing hero and Partner about Grovyle and the future being in ruin? FINE. ACTUALLY GOOD. BC CHATOT WOULD BE SKEPTIC. #IT FITS HIS CHARACTER!! #BUT WHAT DOES SUCK. IS HIM GOING ‘Dusknoir isn’t the bad guy. he didn’t do anything wrong’ #WHEN HE LITERALLY KIDNAPPED HERO AND PARTNER RIGHT I N F R O N T OF HIM. #(​NO LITERALLY. HIS CHARACTER IS IN THE FRONT ROW WHEN IT HAPPENED.) #and him. having the GALL to tell hero and partner they must’ve been ‘seeing things’ and downplaying the HELL they went through. #despite them being missing for hours/days. his own guild recruits. and his angry sprite showing up. #like. I think that’s when I genuinely despised him. #that and him going ‘OH I BELIEVED YOU THE WHOLE TIME HEEHOO :)’ shit was so fucking annoying. #just playing it off as a joke the second the guild started to believe hero and partner. #IMAGINE IF HE W A S ACTUALLY TESTING THE GUILD’S TRUST. SHOWCASING HIM AS THE MORE RESPONSIBLE AND RESPECTFUL RIGHT HAND OF THE GUILD. #and yes. Brine cave he saves hero and partner. but at that point I just didn’t care anymore. #he fucked those two over so much. that I didn’t care what ‘valiant’ sacrifice he had. #and he grills Team Skull for what they did OFF SCREEN. they couldn’t even give us THAT. #<<< THAT or him outright saying sorry would’ve been nice. IKIK his ‘actions’ or whatever but. #eughh again this is all imo. I’m not trying to make people hate him or change their mind. #I’ll get into positives in the second post cause I’m running out of tags

[inamagicalhallucination]

i know i say that atsushi likes to spend his extra cash on kyouka but i also dont think kyouka lives there for "free" like she could, atsushi wouldn't mind, but i feel like it makes more sense for her to contribute since its not like atsushi's rolling in cash

maybe atsushi wouald be hesitant at a 50-50 thing becuz she's so little and he cares so much about her but i dont believe its 0-100 ya know?

#like i feel like in fics there'll be throw away lines the author probably didnt over think about atsushi deciding not to eat becuz he spent #his last change on kyouka #i think kyouka would pull a 36th before she let her brother go hungry even for a moment if she had the money #which i mean she works a job so she probably gets paid #i feel like their financial burden is becuz they don't have anything ya know #like its different spending ur money on bills and food and shit vs having to buy furniture and get new things #like do u guys know how expensive a fucking mattress is #insane #what else #oh right its not becuz she would just let him spend all his money on her and be broke #and suffer #anyway i need u guys to put respect on kyouka's name and kyouka and atsushi's relationship

[blackashbluephoenix]

Offscreen season 5 conversation between Mike and Harvey, probably.

(Sweet, forgiving, too decent) Mike: Hey I know this bit with Trevor's gonna be tough and I understand you have to attack his credibility but he did used to be my oldest friend so maybe try to leave some shread of his dignity intact?

Harvey: (with a shark like smile and a malicious glint in his eyes that suggests he has been preparing for this exact moment since birth)

Harvey: No.

#marvey #mike x harvey #harvey specter #mike ross #suits marvey #suits #harvey is a protector first #and he's been waiting for this moment for a long time #like basically since that day at the hotel #like foaming at the mouth to get his teeth into Trevor #jumps right out of his seat at the hearing like #“LETS FUCKING GO YOU LITTLE SHIT” #meanwhile Mike is facepalming like #fucking knew he was going to have a field day with this #oh well I warned him #should have just stayed in bed Trevor #but no you had to piss off my Harvey #expanding this scene for my AU was fun af #fuck Trevor Evans

[puppetmaster13u]

so tempted to do a thing for @phoenixcatch7's possessed doll au Because I am just stuck with this image of B's puppet body being damaged, his gas mask off, and him going straight up Feral. Am I saying I want to draw him mauling the joker? Maybe. Maybe I do. He'd deserve it.

#batman au #dc #dcu #batman #possessed doll au #cryptid batman #Like he'd have to be very pissed so its probably around when Barbara & Jason were injured or whatever happened in thi au #Like I want to say someone straight up tried to blow him up but he's just Not Stopping #I want people to realize he's not stopping and just going to keep coming #I want for like #like they all know the bats aren't human #but I want for it to *really* suddenly sink in #I want the joker to realize he Fucked Up #which i mean in the original comics he knew he fucked up & the next day or two he got diplomatic immunity #because he killed jason as a spur of the moment sort of thing- and afterwards had an Oh Shit moment #Because he just beat Robin and the bat is going to come after him #he canonically blew up the warehouse so the bat wouldn't know it was Him #Bruce Didn't know it was the joker at first #remind me to ramble about this because I want to like #write or draw a scene based off of it

[moghedien]

i swear if you people start uwuifying OCD like you did with ADHD and autism I'm going to start attacking

#the general idea of what OCD is already so fucking wrong and harmful #if you start being like 'oh my little meow meow is so OCD' or 'its not a disorder its just a different way of thinking uwu' #I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL #ALL OF MY EARLIEST CHILDHOOD MEMORIES FROM AGE 3 AND UP ARE OF HAVING PANIC ATTACKS #PLEASE GO FUCK YOURSELVES THIS IS A MISERABLE FUCKING DISORDER ITS NOT CUTE ITS NOT QUIRKY ITS THE REASON I HAD GRAY HAIR AS A TEENAGER #i saw this like 'i let the intrusive thoughts win' isn't something people use all the time for like dying their fucking hair #its exhausting how many people what to be all 'mental illness needs to be more accepted' #and then in the next sentence want to deny that your mental illness is actually harmful to you and doesn't negatively affect you #and its just because society doesn't accept your different way of thinking uwu #NO I LITERALLY WOULD HAVE KILLED MYSELF AS A TEENAGER IF SOMEONE HAD CONVINCED ME THAT MY MENTAL ILLNESS WAS NORMAL AND FINE #figuring out that something was Wrong with my brain was like the best moment of my life #and this 'no you just think differently don't try to change' attitude may be helpful in SOME CASES #but that shit needs to me pulled back on A LOT online because that framing can be extremely harmful to some people (like me) #knowing exactly what is wrong with my brain is literally the only way I'm able to not let it affect me #and it not affecting me is literally the only way I can function and live happily #like you understand that some people do genuinely have things wrong with them #and telling them they don't is beyond cruel

[shortmexicangirl]

do you ever think about how marinette never found out adrien had feelings for ladybug and how adrien never found out that ladybug had feelings for him. because i do. never forget what they took from you.

#miraculous ladybug #marichat had their discovery moments in glaciator/elation SO WHERE'S LADRIEN'S????? #i think especially now that adrienette are happily dating and ladynoir are so supportive of each other's relationships it would spin them #adrien being like oh shit ladybug liked ME. she was rejecting me for ME. how different would things be if i'd known how she felt earlier? #because now he can't imagine his life without marinette. like yes he wanted ladybug to return his feelings for so long buttttt #if he'd dated lb then he never would've started dating marinette???? the love of his life???? the butterfly effect is REALLY fucking him up #meanwhile marinette is just like. damn ur telling me i could've kissed him wayyyyyyy sooner???? #ladrien

[quietwingsinthesky]

no wonder missy is insane about him. she just mindmeld trauma bonded with him and got confirmation through him that she was right the whole time about the thing that happened to her, AND then they traded life-saving moments. of course she wants her friend back. she needs him to see her again, as clearly as he did in that moment. she needs him to be like her, because among time lords, she is alone, but with the doctor, she isn’t.

#and also he looks like peter capaldi now and she wants to fuck that old man so bad #missy is very. masterlike in her affections. of course she is. but she’s also so so sincere about them too? #its jarring compared to simm!master because you have similar moments right u have like. ‘oh davros is your archenemy now? ill scratch his #eyes out.’ and yeah i could see simm!master saying that same thing same tone. because they are both freaks about the doctor #but this is the same scene where she tells the doctor he’s walking into a deathtrap and when he doesn’t back down. she walks into it with #him. it’s like she made a decision at some point that Of Course They’re On The Same Side Now. #that’s why she offers him the cybermen. that’s why she gives him clara. this is their side and it’s going to be the side that. if the #hybrid shit had come together as expected. would have destroyed gallifrey. and then there would be no time lords. just them. and they would #not be alone because of this. #and the thing is that. again havent started s10 im getting to it. but the thing is that missy decided this was true. #the doctor is not on the same page as her at all. #and that’s why its soooo! okay <3 break my heart forever then <3 #the doctor thinks missy has to earn. has to work at. being on his side. and missy thinks she already is and that it’s so so obvious. #u understand? #missy dw #the master #doctor who

[camellcat]

WTFFF I thought thirteen would be my new girl crush love of my life heart eyes wife you-came-after-twelve-you-must-be-better-than-they're-all-saying bbygirl and then I had to sit down and watch as she told a man who (if he were not a murderer, of course) literally every regeneration before her would've LOVED and FULLY SUPPORTED that "the systems aren't the problem. how people use and exploit the system, that's the problem. people like you" </33333 !?!?

#WHERE IS THAT POST THAT SAID NINE WOULD KILL THIRTEEN FOR BEING A CLASS TRAITOR #WHY WOULD YOU SAY “ERODE PEOPLE'S TRUST IN AUTOMATION” ALL WORRIED AND CONCERNED LIKE THAT??? #WHEN DID YOU START LIKING AUTOMATION OVER PEOPLE THINKING AND DOING THINGS FOR THEMSELVES??? #AND WHY ARE YOU TRAVELING WITH A COPPER??? WE HATE COPPERS?????? #did we FORGET into the dalek?? how about how he treated danny?? god there's so much more I can't even remember off the top of my head #(I understand soldiers are different from cops but c'mon don't even PRETEND twelve would've been any nicer if blue or danny were just COPS) #also a bit off topic bUT MAY I JUST TALK ABOUT ARACHNIDS IN THE UK FOR HALF A GODAMNED SECOND— #I know the companions are usually the ones to do the doctor's dirty work here but like #I just can't see the other doctors NOT having the business man lure the spider for being so fuckin annoying about it #like I was genuinely surprised when they had him do that whole song and dance about not doing it and then he actually just. didn't do it #the doctor LOVES fucking with evil rich business men this is PERFECT. plus why not get back at him for being awful to their companions? #absolutely gobsmacked thirteen let him act like that. I am wrong in thinking that the others would've shut his shit down a LOT quicker?? #anyways. I love jodie whittaker and it's just so upsetting to have her doctor do something so wildly off #THIRTEEN PLEASE I HAD SUCH FAITH IN YOUUU I WAS IGNORING THE HATERS AND FOR WHAT #I can SEE the other doctors in her still I can FEEL them they're there she's doing an AMAZING job but. oh my god. what did they make her do #I can't even say she feels ooc as a whole because jodie is bloody brilliant. it's just these... moments. that don't make ANY sense to me... #especially coming off of twelve?? I get the radical personality switch but that belief is a core part of the doctor. or at least I THOUGHT #thirteenth doctor #doctor who #I still love all of you who love her and reading ur posts/fics but I. will not be making any myself. I do not think.

[strawberry-peach]

I'm still not over him nor this character of his like holy fuck man

#listen i know there are plenty of pretty boys and hot men in the world and we have our little moments of awe and go oh oh wow #but then sometimes you lay your eyes on a guy that just hits different and this dude... this fucking dude #this dude messed with the fabric of reality it broke the time space continuum for a moment #i think i legit lost some minutes of my life while my brain rebooted after crashing bc of the massive sudden input #funniest thing is that happened after i watched the whole of aqotwf like i had noticed he was cute but then i took a good look #without the emotional turmoil hogging brain space and lo and behold i was gone #like i simp over all my babygirls but he just asks for some time of reflexion #i feel like a renaissance poet i could write pages attributing the meaning of our whole humanity on his existence or some shit like that #i mean he pretty yeah? #albrecht schuch #stanislaus katczinsky

[blackcatanna]

When you're chatting about Skyrim with the new guy and are looking forward to having a new nerd buddy but then he casually drops that he thinks black women are inherently violent because they have the wild blood of Africa flowing through them.

#racism #aaaaaaaaaaaah #record scratch moment #I did tell people what he said and he will be REMOVED #I've never had anyone just come out and say shit like that so blatantly #so now I'm like... why did he think I'd be okay with it? #does he say shit like this all the time and no one ever calls him out on it or did something about me make him think I was his racist ally? #tbf I am extremely WHITE #anyway glad I won't be seeing him again #hopefully #I hope he doesn't lurk around at work after the managers rip him apart #he'll definitely know it was me who reported him but oh well #hopefully murder isn't also in his fucked up repertoire

[catastrxblues]

—

#okay i actually want to rant a bit 😭 - not advised to read this because then you might get brain damage #because oh my god??????? weird #(was going to write an entire diary but nvm here’s the gist of it) #basically i was coming home from this chem thing right #i used the train as i always do when it comes to this. and because the new station just got a shiny renovation it is now connected to the #new mall in front of it (we have two now it’s an addition to the first one). and guess what 😭 #i had to go in and get to the first mall because my dad said he’d just pick me up at the lobby instead of the bus stop in front of #the station entrance right. #and when i was on the elevator going up on a call with my mom about food orders 😭 #the guy i used to have a very very VERY heavy crush on in middle grade got to the elevator leading down just as i was on the landing 😭😭 #and i had to make sure i wasn’t hallucinating so as he was descending and his back turned to me i examined the back of his head and i’m #pretty sure it was him. curiosity killed the cat i should’ve remembered that shit because you know what my stupid ass did?? #i was already walking away on my way to cross to the first mall but then that curiosity got the better off me and i steppedonto the elevato #leading down 😭 and followed him out into (apparently) the fucking bus stop #oh my goddd I JUST REALIZED this is my the one moment help #except i don’t think he recognized me because i was never even friends with him lmao. wrote tons of poetry about him ✅ #actually had one proper conversation with him ❌ #i was delusional and kept alone with my thoughts living in my head do not judge me #but seriously even though i don’t really care about him anymore this would’ve been (unfortunately) SUPER important to middle grade me #she would’ve taken it as a sign or something and write like five pages about it #and i just keep thinking about that #funny how things change because IF YOU KNEW how many credits and exaggerated compliments i gave him in my old journal #oh you would’ve laugheddd #like i used to SPEND SO MUCH TIME pondering over him it’s so 😭 #i used to have an oc and i think i based it on my idea of him and then i think that idea of him was even the reason i started to TRY to #write poetically. and i used to relate every taylor swift love songs to him (esp the ones in debut lover and rep and fearless) IT WAS SO #FUNNY LOOKING BACK AT IT NOW #i think he did see me though. i put on this act as if i was searching for someone confused and then (my go to) pretended someone called me #and then i whisked off as if to find that someone #i’d like to think i look pretty cool though. not because of anything (def not my looks because i was SO TIRED from that extra chem lessons

[heartsburst]

WHY MUST I ALWAYS GET INTO THE SADDEST FUCKING SHIPS WHY DO I KEEP DOING THIS TO MYSELF

#frankie yells #like fucking. sure any ship can be made sad if you try harder enough but also. fucking. why must it always be tragic little gays #im not complaining but also i keep fucking doing this to myself man why do i keep making myself sad over fictional gays 😭😭 #like do i just only interact with the shit that makes me sad??? do i only really get engaged with sad fics etc. for them???? #is this a me problem???? #like. um. griddlehark. destiel. hannigram (sort of). ash/eiji. satosugu. aziracrow. zukka (in certain directions). shory. aaronneil. #most of my ao3 bookmarks are me sobbing my eyes out... #OH WAIT ALSO FUCKING. REDDIE 😭😭😭😭😭 I KNEW I WAS FORGETTING SOME BUT OMG REDDIEEEE #me like what if none of the mfs had a happy ending together? what then? #like babygirl are you okay??? why do you always want to be so sad?? #oh god also fucking [REDACTED] and [REDACTED]... both of which i had to stop reading fics for bc i was making myself too sad #like genuinely there is a certain very long fic that i had to put down bc i was making myself depressed #OHMYGOD I FORGOT WANGXIAN AND BINGQIU.... honestly mdzs and svsss in general... kicking my feet 1 moment and sobbing the next #there are sooo many ships in both of those that make me so very sad... too many to remember or list atm tbh #i should go to bed 💀 lmao #it's too late for this nonsense ans i shouldn't have been watching destiel and hannigram compilations in the first place... of course im #just making myself sad...

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

[pericky; a look into ricky's head during their meeting.]

---

"I'm glad you came, I wasn't sure you would." The wine pours, the sound of it drowning out the missing word in that sentence: back.

Of course, is the response, and the part of Ricky that's spent twenty years tearing itself apart to understand why vibrates with relief. It doesn't matter anymore. Of course, of course, he thinks giddily along with the words. He never needed to wonder why Pericles wasn't coming back in the first place; he was always going to.

I'm happy you invited me, and of course he thinks again. A lifetime of pretending he wasn't always going to either falls away. However harsh and lonely the world has been, all's right with it again; and the shy voice of the boy inside him that he's tried so hard to kill says, so quietly, I missed you.

#sdmi #scooby doo: mystery incorporated #pericky #ricky owens #professor pericles #anyway fucking end me actually. lay me down to die #i said i was gonna write more pericky and by fucking god i did #the 'why did you do this to me' to 'oh thank god you didn't actually do this to me' pipeline of abuse folks 🥲 #which like. their last conversation is yet another devastating example of ricky finally standing up to pericles' bullshit Too Late #ricky denounces him in the strongest terms he knows; based on his own feelings and opinions and the way he sees the world #(which: even then he can't bring himself to say 'i don't love you anymore') #(the closest he can get is 'i chose you and i can't take it back; the only way i can imagine not loving you is if i never had at all') #and pericles tries to go 'nyeh nyeh whatever i don't care' (and does a real bad job of pretending he is not obviously hurt lmao) #and ricky doesn't try to understand his logic; he doesn't try to reconcile a world where pericles didn't *really* mean to do anything wrong #his response is MAYBE YOU *SHOULD* CARE. #pericles' view of the world and what's right and acceptable are warped and *wrong* and he's the one who needs to get his shit together #'you shouldn't have abused me you shouldn't have killed cassidy you shouldn't have murdered a child in cold blood' #that is MASSIVE and i think it is really telling that pericles' response is to shut him down with force instead of trying to argue any more #and that in the end is the real true fucking tragedy of it all #ricky is making huge strides one after the other to take back his freedom from pericles emotionally #....and materially it makes no difference to improve his situation in the moment; because pericles doesn't have any less power to abuse him #he never has a triumphant moment where he Overcomes His Abuser and Breaks Out of His Control #there's nothing he can do to fight back until pericles is too Literally Dead to control him anymore #it is one of the rawest depictions of the reality of abuse i've ever seen and just. God. i love it so much #(at the same time i REALLY want to explore a version of events where he got the chance to expand further on that growth) #(the 'all witches are selfish; make all things yours; i have a duty' speech from the wee free men comes to mind) #whosebaby makes things #whosebaby writes #SDMItag #dyn: when i die i want you to die too

[pepprs]

halfway thru my first drivers ed session. idk if i can do this aftually lol

#purrs #there’s like 30+ ppl in the class and most of them are high schoolers who already have like at least 20-30 hrs and i have 3. also the #instructor is really nice and means well but she is also a little clueless and she embarrassed me in front of everyone (or maybe i #embarrassed myself) bc she had us all introduce ourselves and say what we like to do and i said play video games and she was like oh are you #a bit of a gamer 👀 have you been to any of those conventions. LIKE 💀😭 NO I JUST PLAY SILLY LITTLE PET GAMES….. #but ajyways um. i don’t have enough driving experience to start behind the wheel lessons yet 💀💀💀💀💀 and we r watching videos rn and it’s so s #scary like istill have such trouble even maneuvering the car around how am isupposed to develop situational awareness and be driving on high #hihways and shit. this is so overwhelming. it’s like ‘every moment ur behind the wheel u and the ppl around u are at risk’ well idont want t #to be at risk or risk others lives. but also i need to move out. help 💔💖 #anyways this class has INSANELY long breaks (like 15+ mins thank god) and we might be able to end early every day too so. fingers crossed it #wont be that bad and i’ll actually retain stuff and learn to drive fucking finally. but im so scared #also on thursday we are watching a video depicting a graphic c*r cr*sh so. that’s just fucking great #drivers ed tag

[waluigisgaybf]

Im still stuck in the fact that I technically had a perma-death and was DEAD DEAD right in front of my party and absolutely not a single one of them had any sort of reaction or thing to say about it afterwards ?????

#bg3 spoilers #Like no one was like #Oh man I was scared for a second #or like I #I thought I/We lost you #i was fucking DEAD #Withers just pulled some Withers ass shit and showed up #BUT I WAS LEGIT FUCKING DEAD AND THERES NO WAY ANY OF THEM KNEW WITHERS WOULD SHOW UP #Also cant stop thinking about the fact that the narrator says #that in the moments you are DEAD and GONE #your soul and being had finally for the first time ever #felt true peace and at ease #bg3 #The Dark Urge #Durge #Dark Urge #Durge spoilers