#i might've made this one before actually i'm just too lazy to go check

[evilkitten3]

resident evil? no. landlord evil.

#the litter box #shitpost #i might've made this one before actually i'm just too lazy to go check #resident evil #anti landlords

[cosmicstarlatte]

Sunburn (Obey Me!)

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My ~personal~ rankings of most to least likely to get sunburned at the beach!

»Characters: Demon bros + Dateables

»Tags: Rankings, Headcanons, Humor

»Notes: Made this for @solomons-poison summer event! Go check it out! ♡

1. Mammon

No matter how many times you tell him to put some on, he refuses. "It looks funny and I hate the feelin' !" Hours later he regrets it of course and whines about how much it hurts and how it'll affect his modeling gig tomorrow. "I would've helped rub it all over you!"

"W-well why didn't ya say that sooner!"

2. Levi

Actually applies sunscreen but it wasn't enough for the shut-in. He's use to swimming around in his room but he underestimated the wrath of the sun. "Well I'm gonna be in the water most of the time so it's fine!" ...Now he's crying in his room about how normie activities are always a bad idea.

3. Lucifer

This responsible™️ demon put on some sunscreen and laid under an umbrella. He admired the ocean view and shared quite a few drinks, laughing and chatting with Diavolo and the others. He fully relaxed! Once they left to do other activities he grabbed a book and fell asleep...unaware of the Anti-Lucifer Leagues plans. He woke up sunburned with no umbrella in sight. 😔

4. Simeon

Bless this angel, really. All he ever wants to do is help. While helping Luke and some of the others apply some sunscreen, the poor angel forgot about himself and everyone forgot to offer as they one by one went to partake in beach activities! (*shakes fist* a national outrage I say!!)

5. Belphie

Was too lazy to apply any but Beel and Simeon helped. Like Levi, it wasn't enough through out the day though. After a particularly long nap in the sun, he too woke up sunburned. (To Lucifers amusement of course lmao)

6. Beel

Might've sampled the sunscreen because it smelled really good. Small sunburn. Occasionally forgot to reapply and the poor thing should've gotten a stronger spf. He also missed a few spots when he tried to apply it himself when Belphie or Simeon were unavailable. 😔

7. Satan

Gets only a tiny sunburn, nothing too noticeable. He would forget to reapply every so often due to being so absorbed in his book but his sunscreen was a particularly good one, perfect for his skin type.

8. Diavolo (Everyone from here on is tied)

Barbatos would never let Diavolo get sunburned. He had the Little Ds help apply sunscreen to the giant demon before they left for the beach. If it weren't for Barbatos though, the demon would forget to apply some through out the day due to having fun.

9. Barbatos

Failing to apply sunscreen to Diavolo or himself would tarnish his name, it'd be unbefitting for a butler and he would never be able to forgive himself. He is meticulous on how it's applied and when and only uses the absolute best he can get.

10. Luke

There is no way Simeon (or anyone) would let the young angel play around without sunscreen. They make sure to apply every half hour & keep him hydrated. He complains about it of course and just wants to go back to play in the water or make sand sculptures.

11. Solomon

Asmo took his chance and helped the sorcerer apply sunscreen. There was not an inch that was not properly applied and he made sure to re-apply through out the day. 🤭 If it weren't for Asmo though, this man would burn and brush it off.

12. Asmo

You will never see this man sunburned. It does not exist. He brought all different types of sunscreen, re-applies, and still limits his time in the sun. The day he gets sunburned is the day he never gets seen again.

Who would you help apply sunscreen? 👀

⬦You might also like: Fire Alarm︱US State They're From

#minx summer fun 2023 #obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me crack #obey me humor #obey me shitpost #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #obey me simeon #obey me luke #shitpostcifer #◇˖・ﾟ— › cosmic obey me . ⊹

[aquanology]

SHE LI ANALYSIS CAUSE I CAN!!! (THANKS FOR 50+ FOLLOWERS AND NO THERE'S NOTHING MISSING IN HERE ITS 50+)

Yo so I've reached 50 followers a long while ago and I wanted to do something big but I hesitated and didn't know what to do...I thought a lot about it and it's here. The long awaited She li analysis, I was waiting for the new chapter so I can make this. Anyways I hope you enjoy it (or maybe not?)

So from far away people wo see She li as a Bully Mo and when they learn that his family posses good amounts of money, everyone would see him as a rich brat and I wouldn't blame them, Though that's not all there's to it. it's much deeper and yes I have 5000 IQ how did you know?

Now his childhood wasn't that great looking at how he was surrounded by maids and not his parents most of the time, mostly because they were busy working and when they weren't busy doing work they would be busy arguing about things that little She li didn't know much about.

It was pretty lonely even if people would surround him be it the maids, the other adults or even other kids he wasn't getting the attention of his parents. He might've thought that he wasn't important enough for his parents to spare a moment or two to spend time with him or atleast for his parents to look at his way. He hated their noisy fights and so, like any kid who didn't want to listen to his parent's loud arguments!that might've seemed like a broken record for him at the time, he would go outside to distracte himself. I don't know how many times he had to do this to ignore the pain that his parent's loud fighting has been causing to him, and I don't know how long he spent his time doing that (probably as long as the fighting continued) but I'm pretty sure that what we saw from She Li's flashback wasn't his first time doing so. And I'm sure he was trying to inflict physical pain so he can forgot the mental pain. At that point little She Li might've felt a bit...empty because no one really seemed to genuinely care for him or spend time with him and he didn't seem to have a special relationship with anyone either, he might've felt like he wasn't a human because of all of that.... he might've been sad and angry that he can't experience love and affection perhaps he thought that it's his fault for feeling down all the time, when in reality it was his parents fault for not using the spare time they have for providing She Li with affection and quality time instead of arguing most of the time. I'm sure he felt less of person because he didn't get what he really needed as a kid. But little did She Li know that he will feel less of human the next time his parents argue loudly.

That had started with the routine of his parents fighting and She Li looking for something to distract himself with, he ended up digging for worms and I suspect that he did that for a long while that day in which might've explain the bleeding. Later on he got diagnosed with Guillain-Barre' (Ghee-Yan Bah-Yan) syndrome this syndrome is a autoimmune type, in which a persons own immune system damages the nerves causing muscle weakness or paralysis, it can cause symptoms that last from few weeks to several years however most people recover fully while some have permanent nerve damage.

His thoughts were seemingly messy I wouldn't blame him if he still thought that his parents didn't care about him, I mean it was kind of their fault for not asking about what he does when playing outside or with whom, or for the least bit leaving a maid or two to check on him from time to time. But it was that day when he met a certain person in that hospital.

It was Mo Guan Shan that he saw at the hospital. A kid who was capable of feeling pain both physical and mental, not only that but he has a caring mother who seemed to care about her kid. At that moment She Li must've felt envious, a kid whom he didn't know had everything that She li didn't, he had the ability to feel pain and suffer and on top of that he had someone who cared about him who loved him and gave him attention when he needed it the most.

Perhaps She Li thinks that if Mo Guan Shan would become a happier and a healthier person then he would be superior to She Li, because then he would have something that is far away from She Li's reach and capability.

That's why he keeps on hurting Mo over and over again whenever Mo is feeling better or even worse. Maybe She li feels superior or on the same level as Mo when he stops him from feeling truly happy and at peace with his loved ones. As if only then the gap will become bigger than it was before. Because She Li thinks that he won't be able to be the same as Mo is, I mean he might get his syndrome treated and he might be able to feel the pain (both physical and mental) but She Li isn't sure of he can actually be truly loved or if he will be capable of loving and making someone as happy. And that is why he says things like this:

Of course it's not only to make Mo feel bad (cuz like no would want to be told that they are the same as She Li is) but to also make himself feel like they are the same (be it on the same level or the same type of people) when they are not.

I do think that She Li admires Mo for how human he is and he doesn't want him to be anymore of a human he wants Mo to be the same as him, someone who can't have anyone care about him, someone who might numb out and stop being a human for their own desires and someone who can be as hurt and heartless as She Li is regarding that he is hurt inside. I also think that She Li and He tian are similar I mean both of them were not met with love and affection from their family except He Cheng tried to rub the illusion of their fathers love on He tian, though it didn't work quite well. A relationship where you have to sacrifice everything to receive approval isn't and wouldn't be ideal from He tain's perspective, as well as She Li never talk about how he felt (he most likely didn't) the pain that he got from his parents inability to raise him properly like other parents do (by loving him and spending some time with him). However I'm not blaming everything on his parents they had their reasons yet that doesn't mean that it's justified to argue outloud most of the time and pay less attention for your kid than you with your job and arguments. Also I want to make that this post isn't here to justify She Li's bad actions against other people but to just look at him as something other than a snake, to look at him as a human and to hold accountable are both as important as the other is, and I don't want She Li to just have his actions bite him back but to also learn how bad his actions are. I want him to know very well that he hurt others and I want him to feel guilty and I want him to change, remember staying ignorant can not only hurt him but everyone else but learning where he made mistakes and holding himself accountable can help everyone not only the people hurt by him, us too will highly benefit.

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Hey so this is me- the present me since I don't do this all in one day (cuz I'm a lazy person) so I hope ypu enjoyed this analysis and I hope I made it clear enough that this isn't for justifieing She Li's actions but an attempt to try and understand him. Also I'm sorry cuz I made a post a long while ago about She li and I though he had a different illness than the one in the manhua and I linked a website for that illness, however I deleted the post and I apologize for the big mistake...

This is the link for She Li's actual syndrome if you want to know more about it.

Anyways this was my "Why is She Li a bitch" post- wait, shit this the wrong script...welp can't change it now I guess. Again thank you for 50+ followers stay healthy and don't be a bitch like She Li.

#19 days #She Li analysis #Thank you for 50+ followers❤ #this was long I'm sorry #does anyone even bother reading tags or is it just me who does so #be careful of snakes #Mo Guan Shan #He Tian #She Li's parents cuz I mentioned them in the entirety of this post

[hoopdiddies]

Rashes (J. D imagine)

A/N: I've added a few touches since I got carried away by the fluff @deakysgurl! Thanks for the request! I hope it's good enough.

14 +49. Road accidents + when they're injured

Warnings: Just mentions of a road accident and some rashes and a bucket load of fluff

Word count : 2k+

Xx Masterlist xX

Here you are, out in the terrace enjoying an egg sandwich in the middle of a heavy, evening downpour– something you ought to question yourself later on. After popping what's left of the sandwich in your mouth, you dust your hands together and make your way back into your room, coming to hear five frantic knocks echo from the front door.

Who could that be in this hour?

"Y/N! Y/N!"

"Please open up! It's us!"

The familiarity of those calls gets you rushing down the steps leading to the door and you hurriedly grapple the knob, swinging the door open to the lads dripping wet from running from the other side of the road in the misty storm with their arms draped around John who appears to be in an utterly bad shape.

"Boys! What happened? Thought you were doing a gig," You assist them in settling John down on one of the couches, paying no mind to the wet mess their soaked clothes are leaving on the tiled floor– and certainly on the couch.

You immediately go by John's side and kneel to check what went wrong. Nothing afflicting his head, that's swell considering the dangers that would have caused him although he's got his forearm and leg wrapped in dressings, hinting that they might have taken him to a hospital to get treated prior to parking at yours.

"He's got nasty road rashes– one running from the side of his left forearm down to the point of his elbow and the other from his knee down to the middle of his leg." Replies Brian who's got his arms crossed at the unfortunate events.

"What happened out there?"

"Motorbike accident. Right after the gig, he rode downtown on one of the sound engineers' bikes to fetch a few parts to fix two of his amps," he kneels down beside you and you tell Freddie and Roger to fetch the first aid kit from one of the cupboards, feeling John's temperature rise with your hand on his moist forehead– he's getting a fever from the rain.

"And?" You get up and settle down beside John, wiping his face free of sweat, combing his damp hair back to calm him down.

"A sudden halt. A man ran recklessly down the pedestrian and caused James to swerve. "

"Bastard," You mutter irritatingly and ask John how he's feeling. So far he's only shaken his head which gives away the obvious. Freddie and Roger return promptly with the kit, a damp cloth and a glass of lukewarm water to ease some heat into John's shivering body.

"Deaky, you'll be fine." Freddie coaxes softly in his ear to alleviate him of his current uneasiness, accidentally nudging his afflicted arm and earning a quick grunt from John. You tell the boys to dry themselves in the bathroom while you take care of him from there.

Some time later after letting him take an antipyretic to reduce his fever and mopping the slippery floor, John insists that the boys go ahead as they have a hectic studio session to push through tomorrow. You've assured them that you'll take care of him and they leave him under your unrelenting watch to which, of course, John cocks a slick eyebrow at in amusement.

Since he's feeling quite under the weather, you'll have to conjure up an activity to keep yourselves entertained through the evening deluge as the night is barely young and neither of you can sleep.

"Want to watch a film?" You crouch carefully between his legs, your elbows propped up on either of his thighs.

"And a cup of tea too, love." He smiles and you rise up to kiss him chastely before heading to the kitchen heat up the kettle.

Halfway through having it whistle, a clap of thunder followed by a power outage seizes all your chances of going through a movie night and you hear John scream briefly from the living room at the sudden spread of darkness.

He's always been that jumpy– and it cracks you up in the slightest.

The kettle whistles and you grab a lamp from under the sink to light up your space as you make John a cup, figuring it would be a hassle if you'd include one for you.

Speed walking to the living room with the lit lamp and his cup in your hands, you worry that he might've jerked his leg and disturbed the wound, rushing to him hastily and panting upon stepping foot into the space.

"John, are you okay? Are you hurt?" Lifting up the lamp to shed some light on him, you find him hugging a throw pillow with his head down, nodding.

He's so vulnerable like this and his position just craves for your hold. A tender smile forms on your lips as you position the lamp next to the couch and the cup on the coffee table within arm's reach.

"I didn't startle you with my fiendish screech, did I?" He looks up at you bashfully through his fluttering lashes, the light spilling from the lamp emphasizing the build of his nose and the refined curves of his lips.

Albeit a little frightened, his soft features outstands the weak shadows cast by them against the low light; giving him a delicate yet fascinatingly heartwarming image that just thaws your heart from the bottom up.

You shake your head and take the space next to him crossing your legs and weaving your fingers with his, brushing your lips over his knuckles. "Nothing's ever fiendish with you, Deaks."

He turns his head to you and smiles back, his lips pressed firm together almost in a pout. "Hmm, thank you for taking care of me. I'm sorry that I had to come home like this. We would've had an easier night, you and me. Don't worry though, a few days and I'll be able to get back out there."

"I'm sure you will and don't be sorry, the important thing is that you're home to spend this gloomy, powerless night with. Besides," you shift in your space and turn your body towards him, the distance between your faces sealing, "despite your rashes, I could use some body heat."

As tempted as you are to do some things with him that don't involve making him scream out bloody murder at the nudge of his dressed rashes, the corner of his lips rise and he shifts closer to you, planting a long kiss on your lips. You giggle into it as he begins chewing on your bottom lip and tugging playfully on it, his hands creeping their way to the back of your neck to draw you in deeper.

"Mmm, John- baby, not tonight. You're badly hurt and with a growing fever." You remind him as you pull away but not far enough to not feel his hot breath fan against your lips.

"You said you needed some body heat."

Your throw your head back in a giggle. "Not in that manner, silly. I'd love to but I don't wanna add to your injuries."

He pouts and his eyes narrow to lazy slits, sighing in defeat. "You're the best kind of medicine for me."

You cock a brow at him. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Alright, lover boy. We could go for a quick round but for now," you rest your head carefully on his lap and gaze up at him from that angle, his eyes gleaming in a pale glow against the low light as he peers down at you, his hand tangling itself in your hair, "why don't you sing us a little song to lighten the mood?"

Knowing very well that doing so was never his strong suit, he gives you an implying look yet you softly encourage him to go for it– with you being the only one who's going to enjoy the first-hand privilege. You know he can sing, he just doesn't have the confidence to push it out of him. His talking voice is already soothing, how much more if it were his singing voice?

"Y/N, come on. You know I can't-"

"John."

"But I have a fever, as you said."

"You do but you sound fine. When did an injury ever stop you from playing bass?" And you're definitely referring to the time he stuck his hand through a glass window drunk and had to get a few stitches afterwards. He stares down at you as he contemplates on it, drawing a deep breath in to start.

"Tonight the darkness seems so deep and silent stars watch as we sleep. The drifter cross the sky, never stop to wonder why," he has his eyes shut during the first line but as he goes on, his eyes open to you in awe at the sound of him finally singing.

"Million eyes could never weep, she lies dreaming like a child. Here beside me all the while. She'll just dream away, until the break of day and gently wake me with a smile." The touch of his warm palm against your cheek as he loses himself in your eyes as he sings sends you up high in cloud nine. Here you are, hearing his mellifluous singing cut through the sound of the harsh storm, unable to believe that this man is actually yours.

"She makes me laugh. She makes me cry. She brings down and takes me high. She fills my life and makes it real. No matter what she does, she makes me feel." And you are his. The air hangs thin between you both as he swallows upon finishing, just anticipating for your reaction. "Y/N?"

With no words to describe what he's made you feel all over again with his singing, you lift your head up to meet his lips and hook your arms around his neck to haul him in deeper. His skin flushed against yours feels heated, literally and it could be from his high body temperature. He whimpers into your mouth and shuts his eyes as he adjusts himself gingerly to feel you better while avoiding grazing his afflicted arm and leg against a surface.

You break away slowly with barely any breaths slowed down, his smile further radiating as he caresses your cheek lovingly through the temporary darkness enveloping you. "You make me feel."

"God, John... I love you so much."

"I love you too, Y/N."

"And I promise, the mark of your singing will remain sacred in this house." You put your hand up as a sign of swearing and he chuckles softly, brushing his thumb delicately over your cheek. "I honestly sound better when I'm looking at you. You really are my best medicine."

With his attention firmly set on you for the night, there's no way in the world he's going to touch the now cooling tea on the coffee table.

#queen #borhap #john deacon #john deacon x reader #john deacon imagine