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queen-pudi · 2 years

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I Want You

Kyotani Kentaro x Reader 18+ MINORS DNI TW: sex, biting, teasing, uuhhhh I think that's it At the time of posting this, it is my birthday so therefore I have gifted myself this fic. I am such a giver 😪🤧 I hope you all enjoy this!

Masterlist

You were excited, to say the least Your birthday was in just a few hours and you had a party planned with all your favorite people. Nothing huge, just a little house party and a cake. You really didn't need anything too fancy. Honestly, if you had it your way you'd just be having a nice dinner with your longtime crush and best friend Kyotani. Ever since you went to a Seijoh game to support your friends' weird obsession with the setter you couldn't take your eyes off him. At first, you couldn't understand why he didn't have just as many fans as Oikawa. That was until he missed a set and went completely apeshit. That didn't stop you from doing everything in your power to be near him. At first, he thought you were an annoying first year with nothing better to do but get on his nerves. Yet over time, he grew to like your presence and often reached out to you more than you did him. He'd never admit it though. Afraid your head would somehow get bigger than it already was. All you wanted was him and 5 years later you're still just the annoying best friend. You didn't even want any huge gifts. Maybe some money and a few clothes here and there like usual but you really just wanted his love. You never really liked to share what you wanted and would rather be surprised. Even if it's something you've never even thought of having it's the idea that they took the time to think of you that makes it special. All your friends have been hounding you for days trying to get you to crack and share at least an Amazon wishlist. Right on cue, you receive a text from your friend Naomi not so subtly asking what your favorite color, food, clothing brand, music genre, and author was. I'm telling you id love and would use anything you get for me I know but that's not the point! I want to get you something that I know you want not just something I think you could possibly want. I'm not gonna stop texting you till you tell me You rolled your eyes at your friend's childish tactic. There was no way you'd spill the beans and besides that's what Do Not Disturb is for. However, it seems as though your friend was already 10 steps ahead She called your phone 12 times in a row before moving on to emailing you, before going back to calling and then even going as far as to message you on Instagram, Tik Tok, Twitter, hell even Wattpad Deciding enough was enough you decide to reply to her with a request you knew she'd never be able to pull off in a million years. You wanna know what I really want? I want Kyotani to come and fuck me until the clock hits 12 and my birthday is over. She soon went silent. Thinking that it was finally over you go to get something to eat before you hear the infamous ding of your phone Aight, bet You scoffed, there is no way in hell she would ever do that. That's not her place and besides, it's not like Kyotani sees you that way. You're the annoying 1st year that followed him around like a puppy up until your sophomore and junior year of college. You are nothing more than a pest to him and after a while, you grew to accept that and take what you can get from him. You went to bed that night still thinking of the exchange. While you were 95% sure it would never happen, that 5% still haunted you into staying up well past 2 am. ⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰ Waking up you were greeted with birthday messages and even a croissant and coffee from your favorite place all the way across town from your roommate. Scrolling through and replying to the messages you came across Kyotani's Happy birthday 🎂 Short, simple, and straight to the point just like him. It really wasn't much but it still was able to get your face burning at 100 degrees and a

smile unable to leave your face Thank you, Kyo!💛✨ Don't think that just cause it's your birthday ill let you call me that. You somehow found a way to smile even bigger than before. You knew that even if it wasn't your birthday you'd get away with it. Even if he never said it he valued you as a friend, especially for sticking around as long as you have. The rest of the day went by in a blur. You got ready, went to your party, drank, talked, opened some strange but beloved presents nonetheless and before you knew it it was over. Nothing really eventful happened but Kyotani was acting strange the whole day. I mean he's always strange but today he seemed… more jittery? Anytime you went to talk to him he'd immediately start talking to someone else or left to get food when he already had a plate. You thanked everyone for coming as they walked out the door. Shocked to see your own roommate leave as well "Hey, where you going?" You asked, head tilted with confusion "Oh, my boyfriend said his roommate is gone for the weekend so I'm gonna be with him for the night," They said, fidgeting about. "Oh ok well have fun and be safe!" You said, still confused but it's not like it wasn't a valid excuse. "I will! I hope you had a good birthday!" They replied. Halfway out the door, they turn around, a small smirk threatening to make its way onto their face. "I hope you thoroughly enjoy all of your presents" and with a wink, they leaped into the hallway and made their way to the elevator Now you were fully confused and worried. The way they were acting definitely means something was up but you can not figure out what. Deciding to let it go for now you go to greet your last 2 guests: Naomi and Kyotani. "Well this has been fun but I gotta go before I miss my train! Happy Birthday and I love you! Bye!" Naomi blurted out in a rush, hugging you quickly and then dashing out. Realizing it was just you and him all the pieces started to come together. Fuck, Naomi is so dead Deciding to play it cool you go to see Kyotani out, hoping to make a swift and firm exit. "Well, tonight's been fun! Thanks so much for coming, I know parties aren't really your thing" you said, nervousness laced in your tone yet you continued to fake your confidence. "It's getting late so you should probably get goi-" "I never gave you your present" you froze. This can go 1 of 2 ways and honestly you didn't know which one you wanted "Oh, it's fine! Don't worry about it" trying to get him out as fast as possible you lightly nudged him to the door, a hand rested on the doorknob ready to turn and push him out before you were pressed up against it. Your eyes looking everywhere but his. Unable to focus on anything except how his breath hit your face and good his cologne smelled. "I'd really rather give it to you now" he replied lowly, voice dangerously close to your ear as you tried everything in your power not to melt. "Look Kyotani I know Naomi told you to do this but you really don't have to if you don't wan-" before you could finish you felt a hand grip your chin before you felt a pair of soft lips meet yours. Too shocked to move you stood there until he pulled away, hand still holding your face, eyes staring deep into yours filled with a passion you've only ever seen when he was playing volleyball. "I don't care what she has to say, I want you" voice filled with lust and maybe even a bit of longing. His other hand had moved to your hip and slowly started to grip yours as his knee inched higher and higher between your legs. "Do you want me to?" He asked, to anyone else he would sound confident and cocky yet to you you knew that there was a level of hesitation and uncertainty that had your resolve melting on the spot Deciding it was now or never you flung your arms around his neck and pulled him in for a proper kiss. Putting everything you've been wanting to say but couldn't into it. It took no time for him to respond as he kissed you back with a drive you've never seen. Hoisting you up so your legs were wrapped around him as he

slightly ground into you. Without a word he moved you into the bedroom, lips never leaving yours as he made his way through. Finally, he dropped you onto the bed, eyes filled with lust as he bent down to attach his lips onto your neck. Hands traveled up to the zipper on the back of your dress, stopping right at the top before turning to you for one last confirmation that this is what you wanted "May I?" He asked, voice so close to your ear you felt a shiver through your whole body. "From here on out stop asking dumb questions and just fuck me" you moaned out. Hands reaching under his shirt to feel the same body you had been thinking about for 5 years. He chuckled before quickly removing the garment and throwing it across the room. Staring down at your now semi-naked body, only a pair of panties were in his way and that just wouldn't do. "Fucking gorgeous" he growled out before attacking your breasts, teasing them to the point where for a second you thought you'd cum from how much pleasure he was giving you. Soon after his hand trailed down to your thighs before finally reaching your panties. Stroking over top of them he could feel just how wet you were and he wanted to fuck you right then and there. Starting with a finger he pulled your panties to the side and dove in, pumping in and out at a slow pace before deciding to add another finger. You started grinding into his hand, moaning out his name like a pornstar yet you were too far gone to be ashamed. He picked up the pace resumed his sucking on your breasts, aiming to leave a hickey or 5. Mark you as his and only his. Not long after you came while borderline screaming out his name. Hands gripping the sheets to ground yourself. Deciding enough was enough Kyotani ripped his clothes off and reached for a condom out of his pocket. Slipping it on and lining up with your dripping entrance. He paused for a moment, locking eyes as if to say 'last chance'. Wrapping your arms around his neck to kiss him once more you locked your legs around his torso and pulled him in. Groaning at the stretch. He was a lot bigger than you had expected, which is saying a lot cause you already pictured him quite endowed, to say the least. He started slow, trying to restrain himself from the pace he actually wanted. Your walls were squeezing him so tight his strength was lessening by the second "Fuck Kentaro you're so big" you moaned into his ear. Nails lightly tracing his back. That was the last straw He lifted one leg in the air as he started fucking you even harder than you had asked for. Relishing in the picture before him. Your head is flung back as your mouth is wide open and screaming his name like a prayer, breasts bouncing with each thrust and littered in bites and hickeys. Your pussy dripping and squeezing him as tight as possible to keep him in. One hand went to your hair as he began pulling on it, eliciting a whimper from you. Another hand finding your clit as he started tracing circles on it. This had you bucking your hips like wild, feeling the tension in your stomach grow faster and faster with every second. "Fuck Kentaro I'm gonna cum" you screamed, not caring about who hears you, you wanted people to know exactly how good he was making you feel. Leaning down he placed a kiss on your lips before moving to your neck to leave one last mark "Then cum" he said, voice strained as he focused all his energy on making you orgasm. You didn't need any further permission as finally, you succumbed to the feeling. White blurring your vision as you felt Kentaro still pumping into you. Not long after he came as well, groaning your name into your ear as he slowly helped you down from your highs. Pulling out he rolled onto the other side. Silence filled the room as you both caught your breath. With a clear mind, you started to think about what had just happened. You instantly went to pinch yourself over and over again before a hand caught your arm. "Would you fucking stop that" he grunted out, hand-making his way into yours. "Sorry, just wanted to make

sure I wasn't dreaming" Honestly, you still weren't sure this wasn't a dream but honestly who cares. Although your happiness only lasted for a second before doubt and guilt-filled your mind. Taking your hand out of his you sat up, on the verge of tears you gathered the courage to remain calm in your voice. "I know Naomi told you to do this, you don't have to stay or anything… I can pretend this never happened" you whispered, silent tears running down your face. Going to leave you were suddenly pulled back down, back meeting a strong chest as arms circled around you, attempting to comfort you. "I already told you, I don't care what Naomi said. Yes, she told me what you said but that's not why I did this." Voice hard yet still held a softness that was always there for you. "I was already planning on confessing to you, I don't know if you've noticed but I don't keep many people in my life, you're special to me even if you are a fucking pest." He muttered out, you elbowed him in annoyance at being called a pest before turning to face him. Hand reaching to graze his cheek, his hand wrapping your's as he pressed a kiss into your palm. Smiling you leaned up to give him a kiss. "I love you Kyo" "I love you too" he whispered before meeting your lips in a kiss. This one was different from the rest, this one held all the unspoken feelings you both have been too shy and afraid to say. Breaking apart you went get up before once again being pulled down. "Ken?" Suddenly you were flipped onto your back, Kentaro slowly making his way down your body, lips stopping just inches away from your folds. "I believe your present was for me to fuck you until your birthday was over," he said, a smirk gracing his face as he inched his way closer. "And I never like to disappoint" before finally licking a stripe onto your cunt causing you to gasp at the overstimulation. You grabbed your phone from the nightstand to check the time only to be greeted by a new message from Naomi Enjoy the next 4 hours😘 Sent 1 hour ago… Fuck

IF you enjoyed this then feel free to leave a like and check out some of my other works mainly under the tag 'puddin at night'. Im not a writer so my posting will be sporadic af and I'm sorry if this was not the best. Im still new to writing and everything. HAVE A GREAT DAY AND I LOVE YOU ALL

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bennyboyjones · 4 years

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The Getaway (Ben Hardy FanFic) Chapter 2

A/N: Hi! So, here is chapter two to my Ben Hardy AU Fanfic! There are currently several chapters written, which you can find on Wattpad, but I’ve decided to also upload it here as well. It might be a bit behind, but you’ll still get all the chaps eventually.

What it is: basically, a girl from a small town who is bored of her life decides to take a trip to Nice where she runs into ben, who is also running away from some shit and some romance ensues.

Word count: 4.7k

in this chapter: our main lady meets ben

WATTPAD LINK IF YOU WANT TO READ AHEAD

Spotify playlist

In case you missed it: MASTERLIST

here we go:

day one

My limbs felt heavier than the luggage I was pulling behind me as I trudged through the small airport, following the signs to the buses. I was a lot more relaxed now that I was here and knew what I needed to do and where to go.

When I stepped out of the airport and into the warm sun, I was greeted by the familiar sign: NICE, in huge red letters, stacked on top of one another a few feet away from where I was standing. I let out a sigh of relief and turned to my right, where there was a tiny ticket booth with a woman in a red cap behind the glass.

“Bonjour! Can I have two tickets for bus number seven? To Nice. Please?” I held my phone screen up to the window, knowing that this worked better last time instead of stammering for five minutes, trying to tell her where exactly I was going. She nodded her head while telling me the total. I handed over €10 and took my tickets, shoving one into my wallet and the other into my pocket. “Merci.” Admittedly, I didn’t know much French—barely any at all—but I had tried my best to learn the absolute basics in the three weeks before coming here, something I wish I had done the first time around. I knew how to ask for a cappuccino, how much something was, where the bathroom was, how to ask for several pastries, and more polite phrases such as “how are you” and “have a nice day”.

I stretched my arms out and shook them, then tied my hair into a messy bun before grabbing the handles of my luggage and walking over to the waiting area for my bus. The only other people waiting for bus #7 was a couple, probably mid-fifties, who were acting like they were on their honeymoon. I stood a few feet away from them, sat on my bigger suitcase and pulled out my phone to send a quick text to my mom letting her know I was alive.

I kept the bus route pulled up on my phone, with all the stops that would come before mine, and gripped it tightly in my hands while my eyes scanned the time table for the buses behind me. It was 12:30 now and the next bus wouldn’t come for another thirty-minutes. No one from home was awake at this hour so I had no one to talk to but I hadn’t been on social media for a while and so I turned on my data, opened up Instagram and started scrolling.

I had several direct messages, all from Liam. I rolled my eyes and opened them; every message was full of drunk ramblings: him telling me he didn’t need me, wouldn’t miss me, I was the one losing something, not him, I was making a mistake, but he still loved me and would be willing to forgive me and it went on and on for another ten messages. On impulse, I clicked on his profile and blocked him completely. I planned on posting about my trip, about the fun I planned on having and I didn’t need him storming into my direct messages every time I did so, or texting me his opinions, or commenting on any of it. Whatever we had wasn’t worth the stress anymore.

After exactly thirty-six minutes of mindless scrolling, my bus pulled up and I was the first one on. I smiled at the driver as I handed over my ticket and took a seat in the front row, right next to the doors. Last time, I got on this exact bus and when my stop came I pressed the red button but the bus never stopped and I was stuck walking forty-five minutes back the way the bus had come. That was not happening again.

I sat at the edge of my seat, holding onto my stuff so it wouldn’t roll around the bus as the driver took fast and tight turns, my body rocking back and forth with every one. My phone was in my lap and my eyes darted from the small screen that showed the stops, to the window as I watched stop after stop whizz past me.

I wrapped my legs around one of my suitcases to hold it in place and lifted my hand, poising my thumb over the red button, getting ready to push it. The second Gare de Nice Ville was announced by the lady with the mechanical voice, I slammed my thumb down on the button—twice, but the driver didn’t slow down and I could see the stop coming up through the window. There was another ding as the couple also pushed the button, panic in their eyes. I couldn’t believe that this was about to happen again. I stood up and slammed the red button three more times, the panic rising in my throat. I could feel that I was going to cry, really cry, because I was tired, and anxious, and fucking frustrated that this was happening a second time and I couldn’t understand it.

“Excuse me?” I called as I took a few steps forward in the direction of the driver. The couple was still pressing the button as my stop whipped past the window. “Excusez-moi!” I raised my voice and the driver finally turned his head to look once we were at a stop light. I didn’t know how to say, “you made me miss my stop, dickhead” in French so I settled for looking angry, raising my eyebrows and pointing to my thumb on the red button, which had not stopped pushing on it since he passed the stop. The driver didn’t say anything; he simply nodded, turned back towards the road and started driving again. I refused to sit down and stared at the back of his bald head, taking slow deep breaths in and out, afraid of losing what little composure I had left on this fucking bus.

At the next stop, he let me off and I had no idea where I was. It looked like a pavilion with a fountain in the center of the patio, shops and cafes situated around it. People were outside sipping from coffee cups and laughing, families strolling in and out of the small shops and I stood there watching it all—the people, the water shooting up from the large fountain—and felt myself take a huge breath. As frustrated and tired as I was, I was happy because I was here again. I could feel the sun beating down on my forehead, the warmth causing goosebumps up my arms before a light breeze rolled through the loose strands of my hair, fluttering my blazer behind me.

I took that moment to remind myself that I was safe, that a short walk wouldn’t kill me and that I was in fucking France for God’s sake and I shouldn’t let a bus driver’s lack of brain cells drive me to hysterics. I was never good with dealing with stress that wasn’t of my own creation; as in, I worked really well under pressure and often procrastinated projects or school work in order to induce said pressure, but when my stress came at the hands of the universe or of other people, I always nearly combusted or cried.

After pulling up Google Maps (again) and mapping out my route (a whole twenty minute walk), I pulled off my blazer and shoved it into my duffel and started on my way.

When I finally found the AirBnb I was way past out of breath and sweaty, so, so sweaty and my arms felt like they were going to fall off. I looked around at the shops next to it, Hermes and small bakery and already knew I made the right choice. I punched in the code the host had emailed me the day before and walked in. The small lobby was all beautifully tiles in blue and cream. Thankfully, there was an elevator straight across from the entry way and I wouldn’t have to figure out how to get all my stuff up three flights of stairs. I stopped in front of the wall of mail boxes to the left of the elevator and searched for mailbox #2B. It was left slightly open, just as the host said, and I reached in and pulled out the small key. I hit the “up” button of the elevator and waited until the door unlocked before opening it and stepping inside the tiny elevator. It was a short trip up and once the door unlocked again, I stepped out into the narrow hall. The apartment was the first one on the right and when I opened the door, I was happy to see it looked just as it did online.

It was a studio, with clean white walls and minimal furniture, all natural wood. There were a few pendant lights hanging from the ceiling every few feet; the full size bed was directly to the left of the door, a door leading to the small balcony directly across from the front door, on the left wall there was a small clothing rack and a book case filled with what looked like super old novels. I pulled off my duffel bag and purse, let my luggage tip over onto the floor, kicked my sneakers off and walked towards the balcony doors. Next to the doors, in a little alcove, was a very small kitchen with just a countertop, a toaster, a small stovetop, and a relatively small fridge; right off the small kitchen was the bathroom with a standing shower, toilet and washing machine.

The first thing I did was shower; airplanes and airports have an uncanny ability to make a person feel dirty and in-between that and my stress sweating I knew I smelled.

Once I was clean, I helped myself to a coffee in the kitchen and stepped out onto the balcony. I shouldn’t have been out there in a towel; there were other people out on their balconies and I was only on the third floor, not very high up and it was midday. I was sure at least some people could see me, but I didn’t care as much as I should’ve. This particular moment fit right in with my romanticization of this trip and so I was going to see it through. I stood there for a long while, sipping the coffee (because it was black as there was no milk in the fridge), leaning against the cool metal railing whose light green paint was slowly chipping, my hair being lightly dried by the small breeze that passed every few moments.

Later on, after I unpacked my luggage and managed to locate an iron, I started getting ready to go out. I curled my hair into waves before slipping on a loose, long sleeved, low-cut, white linen top and a pair of light blue cigarette trousers. In the spirit of the French, I stuck with minimal makeup, just some mascara and a bright red lip. Once I was ready, I grabbed my phone off the charger, my purse, and one of the disposables and slipped on my tan leather mules.

I walked straight ahead to the Promenade de Anglais so I could walk up and down along the water. This was my favorite thing I did the last time I was here. My first night, I walked back and forth for three hours just enjoying the chill of the wind blowing off the sea, keeping my scarf wrapped tightly around my neck with my hands deep in my pockets (it was mid-January). This evening, the feeling was so different but still so familiar. I remembered walking this exact path, passing benches, kids on skateboards, people sitting on the ledge before the promenade dropped into the beach, couples walking along the beach, the restaurants nestled on rocks, the wind traveling through my hair, the salty smell—but I wouldn’t be able to get that first time back. The feeling I had was no longer accessible and active; instead, it lived in nostalgia and imagination.

I wrote about that first time a lot; my journal was filled with poem after poem about the water, the promenade, the sounds of the waves crashing and the voices of people mingling, how I felt like such an outsider but at the same time so welcomed—how I felt so much like myself in a way I had never experienced before. Ever since then, I’ve been chasing her, the girl I was when I was here. Back in New York, I wasn’t the same and I felt as if I was always itchy in my own skin; it didn’t always feel right—the way I acted, spoke, dressed, cared about both others and myself. I wanted to get her back and I was so convinced that coming here would help me find her.

After about an hour or aimless walking I decided to take a seat on one of the many benches on the promenade that faced the beach. It was getting cooler out now, the faint breeze picking up and passing by more frequently.

I watched as a young couple ran around the rocky beach, playfully chasing one another, their mouths opened in what I imagined was laughter, but their voices were drowned out by the sound of the light blue waves coming down on the rocks. There was a longing that formed in my chest; a feeling that I was growing more and more familiar with the past year. It bloomed often, when I saw two people who looked so in love, a girl my age experiencing success, my friends running off to internships and career opportunities, families that were whole.

I pulled out the disposable and snapped a picture of them; him behind her, arms wrapped around her waist, her feet of the floor, hair blowing around like a halo, her eyes shut tight and mouth open in glee, and his head buried in her hair.

I cleared my throat, forcing the longing back down and put the camera away, exchanging it for one of my favorite books, The Bell Jar. My copy was slightly tattered and every page was covered in notes. I really needed a new one, but there was comfort in reading this same copy over and over, rereading the thoughts of an old self.

I was softly reading my book aloud when my stomach growled so loud I checked around me to see if anyone else had heard it.

I hadn’t eaten since the plane, but I also hadn’t been hungry since then because the time difference was messing with my body’s time clock. My eating schedule and sleeping schedule were going to be a bit off for the next few days until I got better adjusted. I checked the time and saw I had around thirty minutes until most of the restaurants opened for dinner service and decided to roam into the winding roads in search of somewhere to eat.

As I walked away from the sea, I kept my eyes trained upwards, locked on the buildings I passed; taking notice of the pale pinks, yellows, and oranges they were painted, the iron window sills and balconies, the soft blues and greens of their window shutters. My eyes roamed over flower shops and bakeries getting ready to close, cafes still packed with people sipping from tiny cups, cigarette smoke floating between them. Every few feet I stopped to skim a menu plastered to the outside of a restaurant, making a mental note when I could read it and found several things I liked and taking a picture of the name with my phone when the whole menu was in French so I could go back to it later.

I stopped at a small stand to buy a post card to send to my mom and brothers; “Merci,” I said as I took my change, postcard and stamp from the large man’s hand. I turned around with my head down and my shoulder hit into something hard.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” I shook my head and repeated myself, “Je suis désolé.”

“Oh my god, hey!”

I squeezed my eyes shut before slowly raising my head, painting on a smile and looking at the man in front of me. I was sure the universe was out to get me; I knew Nice was small, but what were the odds of running into enthusiastic Eric—they had to be miniscule.

“Hi.”

“I can’t believe I’m running into you! This is crazy. It really is a small world, isn’t it?” He smiled and ran a hands through his thin hair.

“It must be,” I muttered.

“I know I gave you my number but are you busy right now? Are you hungry? Would you want to grab a bite?”

“Actually,” I hiked my bag further up onto my shoulder and pointed towards the entrance of a restaurant behind him, “I actually have dinner plans. I’m meeting a friend and she’s expecting me any minute.”

His smile faltered slightly, “Oh, well, enjoy!” I started to step around him before he said, “Don’t be afraid to give me a call!”

I threw a thumbs up in his direction and turned to see him still watching me. I had no other choice but to pull open the door and step into the small restaurant I had pointed out.

It was dark inside, the only light coming from the small candles sat atop every table, the overhead lights giving off only a hazy glow. I wasn’t sure if they were exactly open yet, since there was no one in sight, but door was open and the dining room looked set up for dinner.

I reached forward and rang the tiny bell that was on the host stand in front of me.

“Hello?” a man’s voice called out in a thick French accent.

“Hi!” I smiled when he came around from the corner where I assumed the bar was placed. “Are you open?”

“Yes, just still early,” he said while grabbing two menus.

“Oh, no, just one,” I held up a finger and sent him a sheepish smile. I followed him through a labyrinth of empty tables, finally stopping at one that was against the wall on the right side of the room. The man pulled my chair out for me, the dark wooden legs screeching against the deep wine tiled flooring. He placed the menu on the white tablecloth, careful to move the small candle away and collected the extra place setting. “Merci,” I said before he walked away.

I ordered a class of red wine and as I waited for my waiter to return, I heard another person enter the restaurant. Out of pure instinct, I turned my head to look but turned back quickly when I saw the man’s eyes flicker to mine. After a few short murmurs, I heard footsteps as the maître d’ led him to his table—right in front of mine. I kept my eyes trained on the menu trying so hard to keep my nosiness at bay.

“Thank you.” The accent was English, I noted.

Café Gustav turned out to be an Italian restaurant, which I didn’t mind since Italian food was my one of my favorites, but it partially felt wrong to be eating pasta my first night in France. There were so many things that looked so good and so many words I had to punch into Google Translate that, by time my waiter returned, I still wasn’t ready to order. Too embarrassed to ask for a few more minutes again, I scanned the menu quickly one more time and ordered the rigatoni truffes blanches et girolles because truffle was always a good idea.

As I gave the waiter my menu, I snuck a peek at the man in front of me and noticed his eyes glued to his menu, giving me the opportunity to take him in; he was blond, his hair long on top but short on the sides, and he was muscular, I could tell from the way his biceps were outlined through his thin white t-shirt and from the veins lacing the back of his hands. He had a nice jawline, square but slightly heart shaped, and his nose was masculine—not too big and not too small—his lips were small but pink, his cupids bow pronounced, I noticed, as his tongue slipped over them. Look up, look up, look up, I begged, wanting so badly to know what color his eyes were.

“Seems we’re a bit early aren’t we?” I jumped at the sound of his voice, my eyes snapping away from his lips to meet his—green.

My cheeks flushed and embarrassment crawled so far up my neck I felt the tops of my ears burn, “Seems so. I forgot how late people had dinner here.” I grabbed my glass and took a sip, attempting to cover my blush.

“You’ve been here before?”

“Well, not here,” I placed my hands on the table in front of me, “but here,” I started waving my hands around me, “as in Nice.”

He chuckled, “Yes, I assumed we were talking about the city.”

“Oh,” I took another quick sip of my wine and thankfully, my waiter arrived with my food and saved me from embarrassing myself further.

It smelled amazing and my mouth watered as the steam tickled my nose, but I could still feel his eyes on me and was so worried that I ate like an animal that I moved the contents of my dish around with my fork until I heard him place his order with the waiter, “I’ll have whatever she’s having.”

A few moments later, another glass was placed in front of me even though I hadn’t ordered one and wasn’t finished with my first. I gave the waiter a confused look and he pointed to the Brit across from me. When I turned my eyes to him, he held up his own glass and gave me a wink before bringing his drink to his lips. I smiled and raised mine back.

I ate slowly, making sure to savor every bite and not wanting to leave before he did. He was hot and so far extremely charming and British. I wanted this flirtation to go on for as long as possible. We both ate in silence and I periodically stopped to look at him every time his eyes went to his food.

It wasn’t until the waiter took his plate away that he spoke, “You have great taste; the food and the wine were great.”

I had finished a bit before, but had ordered a third glass of wine. The restaurant was about half filled by then, the low murmur of the people around us causing him to slightly raise his voice.

“I know,” I gave him a smile and played with the stem of my glass.

“I’m Ben.”

“Josie.”

“Care to have a drink, Josie?”

I tilted my head to the side, turning his offer over in my mind. “I don’t know…” I trailed off. I didn’t know him, as hot as he was. He was confident and charming and I couldn’t tell where the confidence was stemming from. Was he confident because he saw me as an easy mark? Did I look lonely? Did I look desperate?

“One drink.”

I held up my almost empty glass, “Three is my limit,” I downed the rest, “and this was my third.”

He laughed, letting his head fall back, “A coffee then!”

I hummed as though I was considering it. I watched his face, the hope in his eyes and knew I couldn’t say no. I told myself that I would be crazy to pass up a drink with a man who looked that good, with that accent, in a place like Nice. “I think I could do coffee.”

He broke out into a smile and waved me over. I paid for my meal and slipped into the seat opposite him. He reached out and shook my hand before calling the waiter over, “Deux noissettes, s'il vous plaît.”

“You speak French.” I observed, slightly impressed by the accuracy of his accent.

“Only the basics.” He corrected, “I know how to ask for certain things and make very simple conversation, but that’s about it. I used to go to Paris for work once or twice a year so I learned a little bit to get me through.”

“Oh, what do you do?”

“Right now, nothing,” he let out a sigh and brushed a fallen blond lock out of his eyes, “I was in advertising, but it’s not really for me. I mean, I was good at it but I don’t know…” he trailed off and narrowed his eyes at me, “Sorry, you don’t want to hear this.”

“No, I do.” I assured him, “If I didn’t I wouldn’t have agreed to have coffee.”

“What do you do?” he asked once our coffees were placed in front of us.

“Nothing.” I laughed and shook my head when I saw the look on his face, “I swear I’m not making fun of you. I literally do nothing. I’m still in college so I’m a student which means I don’t really do anything.”

“Well, what do you want to do?”

“Write—and maybe edit, maybe be a professor? I don’t know it’s all kind of up in the air right now.”

“Hm, the bookish type.” He took a drink from his small cup and watched me roll my eyes in his direction.

“I wouldn’t say bookish. I read, but I’m not a nerd or anything.” I thought for a moment, “At least, I don’t think I am.”

He chuckled before asking me questions about what I liked to read, why I wanted to write. I kept trying to bring him back to his “nothing,” curious as to what it was he left advertising for but he always deflected and so I dropped it; I didn’t know him well enough to push and I didn’t want to completely obliterate my chances of seeing him again—because I would like to see him again, I found myself thinking. He was sweet and he smelled good, he looked great in his t-shirt and his hair looked soft and his lips looked warm and his eyes were bright and I wanted to see him again.

I found myself disappointed when our cups were empty and the check was on the table, neither of us really able to find an excuse to stay. I could see his eyes searching for something, looking for a reason to stay and I really hoped he would find one because I couldn’t. We needed a reason because we were strangers—we weren’t friends or lovers or business partners, we were two loners who just so happened to end up across from one another. We couldn’t stay simply because we wanted to, it couldn’t be that easy.

“I guess that’s it then,” Ben said before pulling his black leather wallet out of his pocket, dropping money onto the mini tray where the check is.

“I guess it is.” I sighed as I grabbed my bag from off the back of my chair and brushed my hair out of my face.

“It was really nice meeting you,” he said as he scribbled what I assumed was his signature on the receipt.

“You too,” I smiled at him but didn’t walk away.

He slid a piece of paper over to me, his phone number slightly illegible. “We’ll both be here for a while, it would be a shame if you didn’t give me a call.”

I picked it up, “It really would be, wouldn’t it?” I folded the piece of paper neatly, careful not to rip it or smear the ink and placed it in between the pages of my book before tucking it into my bag.

He walked to stand beside me, placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed, “Goodnight, Josie.”

#ben hardy #ben hardy fanfiction #ben jones #ben hardy fanfic #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy fic #ben hardy blurb #ben hardy one shot #borhap cast #borhap #borhap imagine #borhap fanfic #borhap fic #borhap on shot #borhap blurb #four 6 underground #billy 6 underground #6 underground

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queenmorgawse · 5 years

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transmigration for dummies

mdzs scum villain au, chapter two. read chapter one on tumblr. fic on ao3. as always, credits for the og idea to @lee-luca.

Here’s a life lesson from yours truly : if you don’t give yourself time to think about it, you won’t worry about it.

Getting into Gusu Lan’s white robes is so much of a hassle that, as he struggles with the unholy number of layers and conventions, Jingyi has no time at all to mull over the OOC function or how to get rid of it as soon as possible. To think he used to complain when his mother wanted him to wear a dress shirt and a tie to family events — if she could see him now, she’d probably tear a muscle laughing.

Fortunately, Sizhui seems to take it all into stride. Or, more accurately, he thinks Jingyi’s still too out of it to properly function, and therefore sees nothing wrong with having to walk him through the process of putting his own clothes on step by step like he’s a toddler learning about shoelaces for the first time. He imagines the original would feel humiliated, but Jingyi himself is all too glad for a plausible excuse to ask for help to care. The System grants him this one favor, and stays mercifully silent as Sizhui secures his hair into a high ponytail and shows him the proper way to tie his forehead ribbon (I really can’t do it for you, he says, and Jingyi understands. There’s no helping the virginity ribbon.)

Speaking of hair, he’s got to figure out what to do with his. He hasn’t had a chance to look into a mirror yet, but he knows that this body’s hair reaches his waist. From the looks of it, it’s lustrous and well-cared for, but it’s still a huge change from Jingyi’s style, trimmed whenever it threatened to grow past a finger’s length. His head feels heavy.

Right as Sizhui pats a speck of dust off his shoulder and declares him ready to go, the chime of a bell echoes through the Cloud Recesses, which Jingyi guesses means breakfast is served. Oh, well. His hairstyle’s a problem for tomorrow-Jingyi.

Their dorm’s disciples make their way to the common hall in orderly fashion. In Jingyi’s opinion, they look like a row of ducklings toddling after Sizhui, to whom the younger boys cling to like he’s their father, mother and brother all wrapped into the same person. Truly worthy of being the protagonists’ son! Perhaps in someone else, he’d dislike the model student, can-do-no-wrong attitude. In Lan Sizhui, though, it’s endearing — admirable, even.

They reach the dining hall before Jingyi can elaborate on that train of thought. On the doorstep, he has to take a moment. The donghua’s version was gorgeous, but even it pales before the real thing. The hall is all dark wood, draped in blue and white and delicate silver, the cloud patterns of Gusu Lan running across the banners. There’s something engraved on top of the doors, which Jingyi assumes is the sect’s motto, Be righteous.

One of his fellow disciples squints at him and he realizes, belatedly, that the original has probably seen this place a million times before and wouldn’t bat an eye at the scenery, no matter how enchanting. He immediately puts on the most dazed look he can manage, letting his eyes go blank, until the other boy turns away with a shrug.

Damn right, I’m a weirdo! Leave me alone!

The most anyone here seems to open their mouths for is to exchange quiet greetings, and Jingyi’s not quite comfortable enough with his surroundings to attempt it. What if he accidentally offends someone important? That’ll be the end of him for sure. Instead, he busies himself with trying to identify characters among the gathered disciples.

As it turns out, the task isn’t much of a challenge at all. The main branch of the Lan clan sits at the same table, though it does not particularly stand out among the others save for the cloud-patterned banners hanging directly above it. The guy in the middle must be Lan Xichen, Jingyi guesses, if only because of the respect others address him with, obvious even though he can’t hear their voices from where he stands.

From what he can tell, the unsmiling man sitting to Lan Xichen’s right is Lan Wangji, the main love interest. The intuition is further confirmed when Sizhui excuses himself from their group and flits to his side. Father and son barely exchange a few words, their dark heads bent together, but Jingyi could swear he sees Lan Wangji’s eyes soften a little.

He really does look sad. It’s not like Jingyi didn’t know, having read an entire novel about it, but seeing it for himself still makes his heart tighten in his chest a little. Worry not, Hanguang-Jun! he wants to say. Your future husband is coming back real soon! But of course, the System would probably nuke him instantly if he tried to, so Lan Wangji will have to be miserable for a little while longer.

“Come sit with me,” Sizhui’s voice says, and for the second time in less than two hours, Jingyi snaps himself back into reality to come face to face with the other junior’s kindly face.

It’s pretty wild how much effort Sizhui puts into being nice to him. Is it because he was there when Lan Jingyi was hurt? Does he feel responsible for him now? It’s not like the original was exceptionally pleasant to be around. He really does have to do something about it ⎯ or at least, he’ll take care of it when the System’s no longer on his ass about remaining in-character.

When Sizhui doesn’t seem to come to his senses and retract the offer, he hesitantly settles into the seat on the other’s left. Hopefully, everyone will just chalk up the delay in each of his movements to typical post-traumatic event confusion. What even happened on that night-hunt?

The silence that reigns in the dining hall is eerie, only disturbed by the clink of chopsticks against ceramic bowls and the occasional whispered thanks when a dish is passed down the table. It reminds Jingyi of an exam session, which does nothing to help his nerves.

He’s in the middle of his second bowl when the alert chimes in his head.【OOC behavior detected : -10 points. Current balance : 90 points. 】

What the hell? I didn’t do anything!

【The original Lan Jingyi never manages to stay silent during meals, effectively breaking Gusu Lan Sect’s two hundred and fifty-third rule. Points were deducted accordingly. 】

Was this even mentioned? Now you’re just pulling canon out of your ass! When the System doesn’t answer, Jingyi adds, plus, he’s sick, he doesn’t feel up to talking. It’s weird to refer to someone who’s technically himself in third person, but he can’t help it. He and the other guy probably wouldn’t be friends if they met, nevermind body roommates!

【... 】For the first time since Jingyi arrived, the System sounds somewhat irritated.【Objection considered : +5 points. Current balance : 95 points.】

A wide smile worms his way onto his face. So he can negotiate, huh? Jingyi’s always been pretty good at debate ⎯ he verbally wiped the floor with Huan Hua High’s team last competition, okay? He can definitely duke it out with an omniscient AI!

...Put like that, it sounds a little more daunting than before. But if he doesn’t want to end up booted off into a potentially dead body, he doesn’t exactly have a choice either.

Out of sheer spite, Jingyi finishes the third and last bowl of his breakfast in stubborn silence.

He shouldn’t have underestimated the soporific effect of a never-ending lecture. God, and he thought two-hour classes were bad. It's been three, and his soul feels like it's going to throw itself out of the reincarnation cycle.

Jingyi steals a mournful glance towards the window. The sun is shining outside, dammit! This is no time to keep children indoors! Yet Lan Qiren drones on, pacing back and forth in front of them and reading from one of too many foot-long scrolls, seemingly oblivious to his students’ boredom.

Why does he even have to be here? He was born a Lan, he’s supposed to know these things already! Jingyi conveniently ignores the fair point his brain raises (how the original must have known, but Jingyi himself could only recite a handful if he tried) in favor of complaining that, if pointless, is at least relaxing.

One of the Jiang guest disciples is dozing, head strategically propped up and brush in hand to give the illusion of attention. Lan Qiren hasn’t noticed yet. God, I wish that were me.

As if to offer convenient narrative contrast, Lan Sizhui and perhaps a couple others are making a valiant effort to stay focused on Jingyi’s other side, dutifully taking notes. Even Sizhui’s eyes have started to glaze over, though, and when their gazes meet (the umpteenth time Jingyi lets his sweep over the room in an attempt to spot something of interest before he bores himself to death), the other boy actually slumps a little before sitting up ramrod-straight again, just in time to look pristine when Lan Qiren’s eyes sweep over him.

It’s kind of reassuring, to see that even the Lan clan’s resident golden boy is a little imperfect.

Just as Jingyi glances down at the dregs of his notes, wondering if it’s worth it to pick them up again, chaos erupts on his right. Random-Jiang-Extra’s steadfast elbow pose has finally failed him, sending him crashing onto the table. Ink spills everywhere, drenching his notes, the lapels of his robes and even the hem of his neighbours’. Jingyi saves his in extremis by scrambling back, almost knocking over his own desk in the process.

The guest disciple blinks, like he doesn’t realize yet the magnitude of Lan Qiren’s wrath about to descend upon him. There’s a rather large smudge of ink on his chin. From a distance, it could pass for Lan Qiren’s goatee.

Jingyi snorts before he can think that decision through.

Beginner’s mistake. Lan Qiren turns towards him, eyes narrowing, and his laughter dies in his throat. “Do not laugh at others’ plight,” their teacher fumes. “Three thousand and fourth rule, Lan Jingyi! I postponed the punishments for your previous offenses on the grounds that you needed time to recover, but since you’re obviously well enough to embarrass our sect again, you won’t need that delay after all!”

I don’t even know what the other guy did! Jingyi almost protests, but since that objection just sounds like it’ll get him hit with another rule about not telling lies or whatnot, he keeps his mouth shut. Instead, he bows his head and says, “Sorry, Teacher. I’ll try my best not to do it again.” Screw his pride! Anything to escape copying rules! Especially not while doing handstands!

Not to the original’s credit, Lan Qiren looks, for a moment, genuinely surprised. Not for the first time, Jingyi feels a small stab of resentment towards Lan Jingyi. He’s been trying not to, given that he has no idea what happened to the guy’s soul and he may be in a worse situation than Jingyi is right now, but why couldn’t he have been a good, well-behaved student like Lan Sizhui?

...In retrospect, maybe it’s just as good that he wasn’t. Jingyi would have gotten way too many points deducted just because he couldn’t sit still in class.

【OOC behavior detected : -10 points. Current balance : 85 points. 】

Ouch. Must be for the apology. Well, if it saves him from the dreaded handstand copying, he can make up for the loss later.

Against all odds, it works. Lan Qiren rubs the bridge of his nose, stifling what Jingyi is fairly sure is meant to be a long-suffering sigh. “One copy of our sect rules, to be done in the Library Pavilion. Lan Sizhui will supervise you...after his guqin lesson, is that right?”

“Yes, Teacher.” If Sizhui’s annoyed to have to take time out of an assumedly free evening to watch him butcher calligraphy, he doesn’t show it. From the look in his eyes, though, it may not be the first time.

Jingyi tunes out of Lan Qiren’s next tirade, directed at the hapless Jiang boy, who’s still staring at his ruined notes as his martial brothers make sympathetic noises. Can’t say this day started out all that well, but it’s not that bad for a beginning. It definitely could have been worse.

Then Lan Sizhui gives him a tiny smile that carves a dimple into his right cheek, and maybe today really is going to be a pretty good day after all.

strolls in with starbucks almost a month later,,, hello, i haven’t abandoned this fic, mini exam period just punched me harder than expected. i hope this chapter wasn’t boring - i’m trying to set things up before the actual mdzs plot kicks in, but we’re in for some zhuiyi fluffTM. also, i made a twitter! feel free to follow me over there for random au ideas (but mostly crying). still taking questions + prompts, both here and there. and finally, would you guys read a more serious / plotty / angsty fic with ljy x jl as the main ship (though romance would probably take a backseat to the plot)? i wrote a small premise over here, but i crave feedback and validation.

#mo dao zu shi #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #mdzs #lan jingyi #zhuiyi #kim's fics #transmigrator!ljy

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rubyeyeproductions · 5 years

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See Ya Around

Every Friday I go to the Starbucks near my office for lunch. I used to think the boy behind the counter was nice. He looks maybe 18, 20 at the most. Last time after getting my stuff, I said to him, “See ya around.” I thought it was a normal thing to say since I come in once a week, but he just stared at me, the ends of his lips slightly turned up into a smile, and said, “Okay.” I thought that was a strange response but who cares. I went back to work, and the rest of the day was fine.

But then I actually started to see him around. I didn’t think anything of it at first. I’d see him at the grocery store walking past the isle I was in or walking out of the bank as I’m walking in. Just silly stuff, like how you run into your neighbors or old friends. Who knows, I might’ve crossed paths with him many times before and just never noticed till now.

I only started to realize things were weird when I saw him while picking my girlfriend, Emily, up from work. She’s an elementary school teacher, so I was parked outside the school as all the kids were leaving and I saw him sitting on a bench maybe waiting to pick up a little brother or sister or something. He was looking my way, so I waved to him. He didn’t react. He just kept staring. And smiling?

It wasn’t quite a smile. The ends of his mouth were raised just slightly, almost like the beginning of smile that froze. I kept waiting for his smile to widen, but it only ever stayed halfcocked.

That’s when I noticed that he was still in his uniform. Same black hat with the logo, black shirt, and a green apron in the front. And he just stared. And smiled. At first it was funny. He felt very out of place in his uniform and he just sat so still, it looked silly. But then his friendly face started to look sinister. He didn’t change his smile or expression, it was just, the more I looked, the creepier his face became.

My girlfriend got in the car and asked me what I was looking at, so I pointed to the guy on the bench and asked her if she knew why he was there. She kept saying she couldn’t see anybody, but I thought that might’ve been because of all the kids walking out, but she finally said, “Honey, there is nobody sitting on the bench.” I turned to look at her and when I turned back, he was gone. She asked if I was okay and I just made up an excuse about a long day at work.

As the week went on it got really bad. I’d be driving down the street and see him on the side of the road. Not even 10 minutes later and he’d be on the side of the road again, a few miles down, waiting for me. He’d be on the bus next to my car, looking at me through the window. In store fronts where the mannequins are as I walk down the street. Everywhere.

At work, I sit right next to the vending machines and people often stop and talk next to them when getting something. I looked up and saw two of my coworkers talking as one of them got a snack and standing in between them was the Starbucks employee. He was still staring at me. My coworkers took no notice of him, but he was standing right in the middle of them. Not even six feet from me.

I understand this sounds funny, seeing an out of place Starbucks employee everywhere you go, but the humor starts to get lost pretty quick. I never felt alone. I always felt like I was being watched. Actually, it felt more like I was being observed, almost like some sort of experiment. One time I tried walking up to him, but when I got within arms-reach of him I blinked and he was gone. Whereever I go he’s just there. He’s never walking towards me, never says anything, I don’t even think he blinks. He is always just there!

Luckily Wednesdays are date night, so I was excited to go out with Emily and not think about it. But when we got to the restaurant and sat down, a few rows back and off to the side, was the same guy, just sitting alone, at a table. Staring. Emily must’ve noticed I was freaked out because she turned around and tried to see what I was looking at but didn’t notice anything. I tried to point him out but she saw nothing. She sked me if I was okay, but I just told her I was fine. She must’ve understood I didn’t want to talk about it and we moved on.

Yet he was always in the corner of my vision as I looked at her. I could feel his eyes on me.

When we left, I rushed us out of there as fast as I could. When Emily asked why I was rushing, I just said I wanted to take her to see a movie and I didn’t want to be late, she said it was sweet, but I could tell she didn’t entirely believe me. She seemed concerned.

At the theater we got our tickets and some food and the entire time I saw him in the lobby. No matter where I walked his body would just turn in my direction. He wouldn’t move, but his body would, almost like he was standing on a turntable or something. I could see Emily wanted to ask me if I was okay, but she never did.

Once in our seats and with the lights off I started to relax. There was no way to see him now and the movie should distract me. And it did. Until about halfway through I saw him in the background. Still in uniform. Still staring at me.

When the angle changed, he was still in the same position on the screen, just closer. And when it cut again, he was closer. Cut, closer. Cut, closer. Eventually he was in the center of the screen, taking up the whole frame. All he was did was stare. And I don’t mean, like, staring at the camera, but me. He was looking down at me, like he was 40 feet tall on the screen.

I couldn’t even hear the movie anymore. I just heard silence as I stared back up, too scared to move. Everyone in the theater laughed at a joke I couldn’t hear. But all I wanted to do was scream. Emily leaned over and asked what was wrong and I told her I felt sick and ran to the bathroom.

I went to the bathroom to try and clear my head. I could see his eyes staring at me through the crack in the stall. I charged out of it ready to swing, but he was gone, just fucking vanished. When I walked out of the bathroom Emily was waiting for me. She said she could tell I wasn’t okay we should probably leave. I said okay probably more enthusiastically then I should’ve but I couldn’t help it, he was in the poster on the wall behind her.

When I dropped her off at her place she said she was concerned. She said, “I don’t know what’s going on and I understand you don’t want to talk about it, but I’ll be here when you’re ready. Until then take care of yourself. Do whatever it is you gotta do to fix this and give me a call.” As she opened the door to her apartment, I saw him sitting on her couch.

That night I was on my phone before bed going through Instagram and I saw him in the back of the pictures people were posting. And just like at the theater, he was getting closer. I tried to swipe past them as fast as I can, but it really just turned the pictures into a flip-book-like animation of him approaching the screen. I kept scrolling, which kept the animation going. That’s when he waved.

I turned my phone off and tried to go to sleep, but I felt like I was just seeing him with my eyes closed as if he was painted on the inside of my eyelids. I didn’t get any sleep.

The next morning, I started to notice him in the photos in my apartment. Pictures of me and my girlfriend on our first date, my sister’s wedding, my family on vacation in Italy, he was always there with us. My sister even has her arm around him and his around her.

I saw him on the way to work. I saw him at work. I saw him on the way home from work. At one point I slammed on my brakes because I saw him in the rearview mirror in the back seat. When I looked up to drive, he was in front of my car. I just stared at him, but then I decided to take action. I floored the pedal and drove straight for him. My car went through him like he was mist. I sped all the way home.

I am terrified and don’t feel safe. He’s everywhere, all the time! Home, work, streets, mall, computer, phone, pictures. I feel like I’m losing my goddamn mind. I want to call a priest and get an exorcism. I want to get a witch to lift this fucking curse off me. I just want this to fucking end! This sounds funny, I know, but trust me, this is horrifying. This feels like I’m living out a joke that lost all its humor. I don’t want to live like this anymore and I just want to be left alone. I’d stay home, but he’s in the photos at my apartment, I’d take them down, but he’d be in my phone. I’d gouge out my eyes, but then he would probably be all I ever see for the rest of my life. He’s always there and I’m no longer ever alone.

I hate Starbucks.

#starbucks #scarystories #nosleep #G'harvey #jake maurer #Reddit #Jacob H Maurer on Reddit

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pointy-hat-witch · 5 years

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Title: Teach me how to love Show: Haikyuu!! Pairing: Iwaizumi/Oikawa Summary: Oikawa is a lone wolf and needs company and fate has it that brings Iwaizumi and him together so they can learn to love. <3 College AU/Slow Build A/N: Took me way too long for this omg. It’s a really, really late birthday present and I’m so happy I could finally give it to them!! I hope you all enjoy it!

You can read it on AO3 if you want to! :)

The poem at the end/beginning is inspired by this post!

Once upon a time, a boy loved another boy god, how he loved him and the other boy loved him too more than he could say

Oikawa was in his 3rd Semester when he was on his way to his only 8 a.m. lecture. Fortunately, his professor seemed to like it as much as their students, so everyone knows they always show up about 15 minutes late. Oikawa didn’t have to hurry.

He bought his coffee to-go at the train station and absentmindedly looked at his phone, scrolling through some news. He just put the cup to his lips, blew the steam away that always clouded his glasses, when someone ran into him from behind.

“Ah!“ Oikawa fell flat on his face, the coffee, fortunately, spilled mostly away from him. The other person tumbled over one time and almost was on his feet again when Oikawa sat up, scratching his nose.

“Look where you’re-“ Oikawa spat out until he looked into the deepest brown eyes he had ever seen. “-going.” He finished.

“I’m sorry!” the other boy yelled as he sprung to his feet and sprinted away.

Oikawa blinked a few times until he got himself up again. He groaned. His coffee was done for, his coat sprinkled with coffee stains. Great. That’s how his day had to start.

He grabbed his bag, pushed his hands deep into his pockets and tramped to his class. This encounter woke him up more than any coffee probably would and with his frustration, Oikawa was the only one who actually paid attention in class and discussed a few things with the professor, earning him a clap on his shoulder, when he left the classroom.

“Haa.” Oikawa exhaled when he went outside again. He still had 2 hours until practice and since he didn’t have his morning coffee, his stomach was growling for something. The cafeteria it is. The way to the cafeteria was a short one since his department had their own cafeteria because it was more secluded from the other departments and most of the time there weren’t a lot of people. Oikawa welcomed this especially at 10 a. m. in the morning without coffee.

He entered through the two-winged door and rummaged through his wallet to find his student ID card. When he looked up his eyes met the deep brown eyes from this morning. He stopped dead in his tracks as did the other one.

He averted his gaze and for a moment Oikawa thought, the boy would dash. He crossed his arms and tapped with his foot on the floor, like a scolding mother. The other man exhaled and slowly closed the distance.

“Hey.” He greeted through gritted teeth, making Oikawa raise an eyebrow.

“Hey.”

“So”, he scratched the back of his head. “This morning … I didn’t mean to, uhm--“, he seemed to look for the right words.

“Didn’t mean to run into me? Didn’t mean to spill my coffee all over me? Didn’t mean to sprain my ankle?”

“You’re hurt?!” The brown eyes lit up with panic and he was already about to bow in apology.

“No.” Oikawa tutted. “But I could have been!” Theatrically Oikawa put his hands against his forehead and leaned back.

“Oh.” The other one stood up straight again. “You’re just a little shit. No need for an apology, I guess.”

Oikawa audibly snapped for air. “How rude!” he pouted.

The other student scratched his head once more and groaned. “Alright. Can I make up for it?”

“For running into me or for being rude?”

The dark brown eyes flared up and Oikawa rowed back. “Yes, you may. I want another coffee. And”, Oikawa already walked past him and gestured him to follow, “I’m Oikawa.”

Oikawa could feel how the other one rolled his eyes but he followed nonetheless.

“Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi Hajime.”

Oikawa smiled his most perfect smile. “Nice to meet you, Iwaizumi.”

Iwaizumi followed Oikawa disgruntled to the counter at which he already placed his order. “Hello, one black coffee, please.” Oikawa could feel the raised eyebrows and looked back to Iwaizumi.

“What?” He narrowed his eyes a little but kept his smile on his lips.

“Didn’t think you were one of the polite ones.” Iwaizumi shrugged, already fumbling with his wallet. Oikawa let out a fake gasp and stemmed his hands at his hip.

“Because I’m not as rude as you. It’s called decency.”

“Whatever.” Iwaizumi handed the cashier, a blonde young girl, 500 Yen with the remark “Keep the change”, and nodded Oikawa with him.

“Alright, so you’re just rude but generous. Noted.” Oikawa grinned and followed Iwaizumi through the few tables to one at which two people sat already. They looked up when Iwaizumi approached the table.

“Back already?” asked one of them and cocked his eyebrow when he sees Oikawa directly behind him.

Iwaizumi motioned Oikawa to sit down.

“Run into some … trouble.” He gestured between the three males back and forth. “Oikawa, Hanamaki, Matsukawa. Greetings and all of that.”

Oikawa was uncharacteristically silent when they approached because he had to brace himself with the sudden social interaction he wasn’t prepared to handle. He put on one of his best smiles on and sat down next to Iwaizumi, leaning back into his chair as relaxed as possible.

“Nice to meet you.”

The other boys nodded at Oikawa and at the same time giving Iwaizumi a more than questioning look which Oikawa more than happy answered.

“He had to pay a debt from this morning. Charming, isn’t he?”

Iwaizumi huffed. “If I were you, I would be careful what I’m saying. The coffee is still hot.” Iwaizumi’s eyes narrowed as he leaned on the table with his elbows. Hanamaki and Matsukawa kept their snickering hidden by their hands, but Iwaizumi still shot them a glare.

“Do you want to say something?”

“Nope. Everything’s fine.” Hanamaki continued to slurp at his coffee and Matsukawa tapped on his phone. Both highly exaggerated.

They kept talking about an hour which was more relaxing than Oikawa expected and more than once he genuinely had to laugh. With their outgoing personality, Matsukawa and Hanamaki got their hands on Oikawa’s number and made Iwaizumi share his one as well.

The next day, Oikawa either deliberately or unconsciously, he didn’t even know himself, wandered to the cafeteria at the same time as the day before and found Hanamaki and Matsukawa alone, this time. The day after he found the three of them together and the day after that he was alone with Iwaizumi who was studying intently.

Oikawa sat down on the other side of the table and looked at Iwaizumi expectantly.

“What?” Iwaizumi huffed. One of his books lay open next to his coffee and he didn’t even bother looking up.

“Aw, I was waiting for a cheerful ‘hello’ or ‘good morning’ and this is what I get?” Oikawa gasped theatrically.

“You didn’t deserve one, yet.” Iwaizumi slurped on his coffee, flinching as the hot beverage burnt his tongue. Oikawa blinked and leaned over.

“Want me to kiss it better?”

Eyes wide and with a tinge of pink on his cheeks, Iwaizumi looked up. “What the fuck? No.” He shoved his hand into Oikawa’s face and pushed him away.

“Rude, Iwa-chan!”, he cried and rubbed his nose.

Iwaizumi, unimpressed, kept reading, his lips a little pursed. He already got used to Oikawa’s nicknames, since Oikawa did the same to ‘Mattsun’ and ‘Makki’.

They spent their lunch in silence, which Oikawa felt rather pleasant to his surprise. When Iwaizumi finally closed his book, exasperated leaning back, Oikawa smiled fondly at him.

“Such a dedicated student. You should get a reward.”

Iwaizumi pinched his nose and blinked but Oikawa had already left the table. He came back within a few minutes and presented Iwaizumi with a croissant sprinkled with chocolate chips.

“Thanks.” Iwaizumi said before stopping himself and Oikawa gave him one of his genuine smiles. Sometimes it felt good to do someone a favor without an ulterior motive.

“Well, then. Have to go. Don’t study too much, Iwa-chan, your brain wouldn’t take it.” He waved goodbye and as he turned around, he heard a growl and a second later a scrunched-up paper hit his head.

“Rude!” he cried with a smile on his lips.

In the next two weeks, it was almost routine to run into each other at that cafeteria. Oikawa wasn’t sure they did that on purpose or if he just never paid attention to his surroundings. But it was a welcomed change. Oikawa had resorted to keep to himself so much, a defense mechanism he adapted for not being hurt by people who were wandering out of his life in a second.

Most of the times, it was all four of them but sometimes it was just him and Iwaizumi and whenever that was the case, Oikawa’s chest filled with warmth despite the cold autumn season.

It was on a Friday, Oikawa already done with his studies he wanted just a relaxed weekend when he woke up about an hour before his alarm was set. A pain crawled into his chest, clinging around his heart, robbing him from his breath.

Oikawa sat up, leaning over and grabbing at his shirt. He gasped for air and what seemed to be an eternity but actually just a few seconds, the pain faded. Oikawa grunted, sweating. He rubbed his chest and took a few deep breaths.

“Already?” He huffed to himself. He will never get used to this pain.

It took him about all his energy to get up and get ready for uni, already braced himself to play his part for today. On his way to his class, he put on his best smile and whenever he passed someone who’s eyes lingered for a second on him, he gave them a flashing smile and a wink as he passed by.

After two lectures, his cheeks hurt from all the smiling, and when he finally got to the cafeteria he was excessively happy to rest them for a while.

He slumped down next to Iwaizumi who tried to explain Matsukawa and Hanamaki the interaction between muscles, stress, and pressure. He didn’t look up when Oikawa leaned back and slurped on his coffee.

“Hey, wanna go on a group date with some girls?” Oikawa interrupted his explanation and earned a ‘tch’ from his side.

“Where does that come from?” Hanamaki and Matsukawa almost asked in unison. “Lonely at night?” Hanamaki wiggled his eyebrows.

“I can’t hide someone like this forever”, Oikawa made a wide gesture to himself, “this is made to make people happy. In more than one way, if you know what I mean.” A smug grin on his lips. He glanced over to Iwaizumi who was surprisingly silent and just looked at him.

Matsukawa leaned back. “Well, if you want someone why do we have to tag along if you just get away with all of them?”

“Mattsun! I would never! I am a good friend and want my friends to be happy as well. And who am I do deny you such pleasure yourself?” He grinned, pulling out his phone. “I have a few numbers on hold, so, four for us?” He glanced around the table, somehow awaiting some reaction from Iwaizumi who just folded his arms.

“Four it is.” He decided and began tipping furiously and within a minute he pushed his phone back into his pocket. “Tomorrow, 2 p.m., Café Crow’s Nest.”

“How…?” Hanamaki shook his head. “How can an asshole like you get a date, four dates just like that?”

Oikawa leaned his chin on the palm of one hand and circled the rim of this cup. “First of all, I’m not an asshole, excuse you”, he blinked in played offense, “and secondly, I’m only an asshole to you all.”

His grin was smacked away by a hit to the back of his head by Iwaizumi. “Don’t feel all high and mighty ‘bout that, Trashykawa. You’re not as special as you think.”

“Iwa-chan!”

Matsukawa and Hanamaki snickered behind their hands and Oikawa looked at them equally feeling betrayed.

“Here I am, showing you the way to adulthood and this is your thanks?!” He pouted and leaned back with his arms folded.

“We can climb that staircase just fine, thank you very much, your Majesty.” Hanamaki threw scrunched up paper beads at him which Oikawa chose to ignore.

The next day, Oikawa woke up to a similar pain in his chest, heaving for air when the sun started to rise. He rubbed his chest and got up, no way he would get any more sleep. He had more than enough time to go for a run and had a nice, warm shower. He needed some time to tame his hair but after half an hour he was happy with it.

He put on some clothes that were not his usual taste, but he already knew that most people he went out with didn’t like his choice of colors and patterns. Boring.

Oikawa stood at about 1:45 p.m. in front of the station and waited for his friends. It didn’t take them long to show up and with a small, small flap to his heart he saw Iwaizumi dressed up, even if that meant, he didn’t just wear a hoodie but a button-down shirt with his sleeves rolled up. Oikawa swallowed down whatever he was feeling and grinned at them.

“You all ready, boys?”

As answer, they all groaned in unison and walked past him.

“Oi!” Oikawa spun around and fell in line. “Why are you so mean?!”

“Because we love you, Oikawa.” Matsukawa deadpanned, eyes on his phone. He didn’t see the fright that was visible on Oikawa’s face for just a split second.

“Mattsun! Did you just confess your undying love to me? I am so flattered, but, y’know, I think we need more time.” Oikawa put his hand on Matsukawa's shoulder and shook his head. “Please don’t be too upset.”

Hanamaki grinned at Matsukawa. “You just got rejected my friend, from no one else but Oikawa. How does that feel?”

Matsukawa made a face and even Iwaizumi snorted at them.

The Crow’s Nest wasn’t far away, and Oikawa didn’t hesitate and entered first of them. He took a look through the room which was roomier than the outside presumed. He spotted a table with four women, all sitting side by side and were watching the door. A winning smile found its way on Oikawa’s face.

In the few seconds it took him to cross the room to them, he scanned their reaction to him. Oikawa had learned to discern between superficial and genuine interest. The woman to the far left looked at him with a spark in her eyes and Oikawa made his choice.

He started from the right to introduce himself and gave everyone his best smile. When he reached the last one, his eyes lingered just a second longer and she noticed, and Oikawa noticed that she noticed by her flushed cheeks.

Iwaizumi took the chair next to him followed by Matsukawa and Hanamaki.

“I hope, you didn’t wait for too long, my apologies.” Oikawa looked at them with almost honest concern for what Iwaizumi kicked his foot.

“Did you already order something?” Oikawa overplayed his aching foot skillfully.

“Not yet, we wanted to wait for you.” The woman in front of Oikawa, Aiko, replied. Oikawa nodded.

“Well, then it’s our duty to get you something! What do you want?”

With Oikawa at their side, the conversation went on smoothly, even though they wouldn’t admit to it, and the conversation in which all took part slowly faded to smaller conversations between two each.

Oikawa couldn’t help but glance over to Iwaizumi from time to time, but to his surprise, Iwaizumi was able to hold a smooth conversation on his own.

“Everything alright?”

Oikawa blinked, and his eyes found Aiko’s again which looked at him in confusion.

“Yes, sure, sorry, I was just thinking about something.”

Wrong thing to say. Aiko cocked her head. “Do I bore you?”

Oikawa could hear the little teasing in her voice and smiled. “On the contrary. I was just thinking about getting out of here for a little more … privacy.” Oikawa intentionally paused to give it more weight and was more than pleased when he felt Iwaizumi tense up next to him.

Aiko’s smile went back up. “Sounds good to me.” She leaned over to her friend and whispered something to her and they both giggled.

Oikawa nudged Iwaizumi at his arm and grinned with a wink. “Good luck to you, you’ll need it.” Iwaizumi’s hand darted up before Oikawa could react. “Ouch!”

They both said their goodbyes to their friends and Oikawa offered Aiko his arm when they went out of the café.

“Such a gentleman”, Aiko quipped but couldn’t hide her red cheeks. Oikawa felt how he was winning at his self-proclaimed game.

They spent the rest of the afternoon and the early evening together, walking around and talking about everything and nothing. Oikawa made sure to always steered the conversation back to her and compliment her in every way possible but tried not to overdo it. And he genuinely had some fun.

Aiko was ambitious, funny, stubborn. Everything could be perfect.

Oikawa brought Aiko back to her apartment and they shared a short kiss. Aiko smiled behind her hand and waved as she went in. Oikawa waited until she was out of sight until he dared to stop smiling.

On his way back to the train station he pulled out his phone and opened his messenger app.

-- Hanamaki changed the group name to: 3 aces and Oiks --

You (8:21 pm): rude!! y?

Makki (8:22 pm): you just came home? y not stay over? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

You (8:22 pm): in contrast to some other people I have sth called class

You (8:22 pm): how did u guys do when i was gone?

Mattsun (8:23 pm): good

Makki (8:23 pm): dont play it down you make everyone else jealous

You (8:24 pm): what did I miss?

Makki (8:24 pm): Matsukawa made the biggest catch

Iwa-chan (8:25 pm): ugh

You (8:25 pm): ???

You (8:25 pm): is it himself

You (8:25 pm): makki do you mean mattsun came home alone and he made out with himself?

Mattsun (8:26 pm): wtf oikawa

Makki (8:26 pm): lol almost

You (8:27 pm): well i don’t wanna boast but i don’t think anyone than i made the biggest catch

You (8:27 pm): so you can’t make me jealous!!!!

Oikawa pocketed his phone and buried his hands with it in his jacket. He didn’t want to think about these girls for the moment. It was too exhausting.

When he came home, he changed and dropped down on his couch and finally took another look at his phone. Hanamaki and Matsukawa spammed their group chat, probably with some bad puns, and another message notification blinked in the background. From Iwaizumi. Oikawa blinked. It was pretty rare that Iwaizumi messaged him first and in private.

Iwa-chan (8:42 pm): oi

Iwa-chan (8:42 pm): so u had a good evening?

You (9:23 pm): iwa-chan!!

You (9:23 pm): were you worried?

You (9:23 pm): next time i text you when i get home!!!

Iwa-chan (9:24 pm): jump in a lake for all I care

You (9:25 pm): so mean!! youll regret saying that when i AM in a lake

Iwa-chan (9:25 pm): what? thats not what it means stupid

You (9:26 pm): i still stay correct

Iwa-chan (9:27 pm): whatever dont care

You (9:27 pm): i know u do

Iwaizumi didn’t answer, and it was read in his app that he was offline. Oikawa exhaled. Today was more exhausting than the rest of the week combined, and he was wondering why. It wasn’t for sure the first time he had to play gentleman to get his way but today was different. Oikawa felt he was way too distracted and had to concentrate more than ever.

Oikawa had to be more tired than he anticipated because he fell asleep without noticing and only woke up late in the night when his phone lit up in his hand.

His eyes cracked open and he shut them immediately, the bright light blinding him.

“Ugh.” Oikawa fumbled with his phone and through the smallest slit, he managed to dim his display.

Oikawa unlocked his phone to see a message notification by ‘Iwa-chan’. A smile crept onto his face when he opened the message.

Iwa-chan (2:13 am): go to bed

You (2:15 am): iwa-chan r u psychic?

Iwa-chan (2:15 am): I just know you

You (2:16 am): awww yes u do

Oikawa had to gather all his strength to get up from the couch, his joints stiff from laying in a wrong position. He scuffled through his apartment to flop down on his bed. Oikawa winced by the cold bedsheets and curled up under the blanket in hope it will warm up quickly.

He pulled out his phone and opened the message app with Iwaizumi.

You (2:19 am): am in bed

You (2:19 am): u should 2

Iwa-chan (2:20 am): i am just wanted to remind you aswell

Iwa-chan (2:20 am): gn

You (2:21 am): good n8 iwa-chan!!

Oikawa felt a warmth in his chest he couldn’t correlate but it didn’t feel bad, so he didn’t bother. One has to enjoy the little things. He put his phone on his nightstand and fell asleep almost instantly.

The next day was relaxed and Oikawa could sleep in, could go for a run and had a small breakfast. He checked the time when he was eating and still got time before his dinner date with Aiko. He knew he was moving fast. Most of the time, Oikawa took his time but with Aiko, he wasn’t sure. He didn’t want to spend more time on her than he had to.

The day went by pretty uneventful and Oikawa found himself right on time in front of Aiko’s door. Aiko opened the door and Oikawa gave her an honest smile.

“You look gorgeous.”

Aiko’s cheek turned the slightest pink and then smiled. “Thank you. You don’t look too shabby yourself.”

They walked the way to the restaurant since it wasn’t that far away from her home and the already dark sky looked stunning with all its stars. Their breath formed small clouds in front of them and by the time they arrived at the restaurant, their hands were freezing. Still, they both grinned at each other when they entered. Oikawa thought, if he would be born differently, he could be friends with her.

They were brought to a table in the back and were handed the menus.

“Wow. I’m impressed. Do you take out all the girls to such fancy restaurants?” Aiko had a sparkle in her eyes which told Oikawa that she wanted to pick on him a little bit.

Oikawa replied with the same playing smile. “Only the girls that I like.”

“I feel honored.” Aiko winked and shifted her attention to the menu.

They both ordered some pasta and a dessert and while they were waiting for their food, they made some small talk. Oikawa tried to pay the utmost attention to Aiko and always responded to everything she said.

Dinner went by almost in a blink for Aiko and like a day for Oikawa and their dessert was brought to them. Aiko exhaled in delight when she saw their soufflé.

“Wow. This looks stunning!” She had to pause for a moment to take in the beauty of their dessert but then a frown found its way on her face. “Actually”, she hesitated.

Oikawa looked up and cocked his head to his side. “Is something wrong?”

Aiko didn’t meet his gaze and fumbled with her spoon. She laughed a little nervous.

“A-are you”, Oikawa stammered, “on a diet? I mean, do what you want to do, but believe me, you really don’t have to!” He had grabbed her hand as he stumbled through his assumption.

Aiko giggled behind her other hand. “No, don’t worry. I think I can say, I’m pretty healthy.” She looked down at her hand that was held tightly by Oikawa.

“I just”, she squeezed his hand slightly which he reciprocated. “I just wanted to make sure, you take this serious.” She looked at him with determination that almost made him falter. Just almost.

Oikawa squeezed her hand a little tighter and looked her in the eyes.

“Believe me. I wouldn’t dare to just waste your time. I think”, he swallowed and licked over his dry lips, “I was never this serious about any other girl. I really … I really do like you.”

A slight blush appeared on her cheeks and her lips twisted in a smile unconsciously. She squeezed his hand as well.

“Good, because I really”, she giggled once more, “I really like y-“

Oikawa looked at her. Her eyes were pinned on him and were glistening. He gave her the most earnest smile he could muster at this point.

The glistening in her eyes stopped and a spur of confusion crossed her face. She looked at their hands and pulled her's away.

“I’m sorry, I-“, she grabbed her bag which hung over the back of her chair. “I have to go.” Almost in panic, she rushed out of the restaurant leaving Oikawa by himself. He exhaled. His heart grew warm and full and the underlying pain in his chest faded away.

By now, he was used to this but the whole ordeal still hurt nonetheless. Oikawa grabbed his fork and finished his dessert, paid their meals and headed home. On his way, he deleted Aiko’s number from his phone. She wouldn’t text him again anyway.

Oikawa was exhausted by the time he came home. He threw his coat over the back of his couch, peeled out of his clothes and fell into his bed. He didn’t want to think about Aiko and their dinner anymore. He searched with his hands for his nightstand without looking and fumbled inside the drawer. He pulled out a small bottle of pills, dropped one of them in his palm and swallowed it dry.

The sheets were still cold which made him shiver, so he rolled himself in a small burrito with his blanket and welcomed the dullness which laid over him and dragged him into a deep sleep.

That night Oikawa had the longest dream since forever. He usually never dreams or at least didn’t remember. This time, however, he did remember. The dream started with his earliest memories of his mother and him. They always had only each other but it was more than enough.

The dream fast forwarded through his childhood how they moved from place to place, his mother always meeting different men, but no one ever stayed. He saw flashes of his mother’s face smiling at him but with a hurt in her eyes, he never had understood until now.

This rather peaceful time ended when he turned 13. The pain he was already used to now, had woken him at the dead of night, rushing him into the arms of his mother. She held him crying. For him or for herself, he couldn’t tell.

Another rush of memories flashes in front of him. The girl from fifth grade in the class next to his had always talked to him with a blush on her cheeks and laughing at almost everything he said. She was okay, but he only talked to her because he had to.

“Our hearts, they always want more.” It echoed through the images.

Oikawa talked to the girl more often now and one time, it was raining heavily when they both stood outside the school. Oikawa had an umbrella in one hand and offered it to her.

“We can’t be loved. Yet we live off of love.”

Fast forward again. He sat at the table in front of Aiko, looking at her bright smile and the blush on her cheeks. He managed a smile for her as well. But he knew what will happen eventually. Aiko’s face blend together with the face of the girl from elementary school. They both looked at him with such a beautiful smile as if everything would fall in place but the next moment the ground opened up under him.

They looked at him and every ounce of warmth ceased from their eyes. And they left. Left him falling.

“We steal their hearts and as soon as they fall in love with us, they un-love us.”

He dropped onto the chair again. Blinking he reached for Aiko’s hand again just to hold another hand. He looked up and the face of Iwaizumi greeted him with the most perfect smile. His eyes were gleaming and glued on him.

Oikawa wanted to say something, but his voice refused to work. Iwaizumi threw his head back and laughed, squeezing his hand. Oikawa wanted to scream.

Iwaizumi looked back at him. Warmth and a feeling of security in his gaze. He opened his mouth and … Oikawa saw the sparkle in his eyes disappear. He let go of Oikawa’s hand. He stood up and walked out of the restaurant. Out of his life.

“We are thieves of hearts.”

Oikawa woke up with a cry on his lips and wet eyes. His heart was beating hard in his chest and a different pain settled in. His breath was hitched, and the afterimages of his dream lingered in the darkness.

When he finally calmed down a little, Oikawa pulled up his knees and buried his face in them.

“Iwa-chan…” it was only a shaky breath, but it filled his room and Oikawa felt a longing he didn’t know. Without realizing he had grabbed his cell phone and opened the chat with Iwaizumi.

You (3:34 am): u awake?

Iwa-chan (3:34 am): wtf

Iwa-chan (3:34 am): I was just about to write you to go to bed

Iwa-chan (3:35 am): go to bed

You (3:35 am): aww thanks mom

Iwa-chan (3:36 am): fuck off

You (3:36 am): y r u still awake btw?

Iwa-chan (3:37 am): had to study.

You (3:37 am): iwa-chan i know u r stupid but u shouldnt study this late

Iwa-chan (3:38 am): fuck you

Iwa-chan (3:38 am): im out

You (3:38 am): no!!

You (3:38 am): wait

You (3:38 am): pls

Iwa-chan (3:39 am): …

You (3:39 am): <3

Iwa-chan (3:39 am): whats going on?

Iwa-chan (3:39 am): i think thats the first time u said please to me

You (3:39 am): rude

You (3:39 am): i am always polite

Iwa-chan (3:40 am): so?

Iwa-chan (3:40 am): whats the matter

Oikawa pondered about answering. He had two options: either downplay it and making Iwaizumi mad to the point he really goes offline. Or he could be honest and hope Iwaizumi won’t make fun of him.

He sighed. Iwaizumi had slowly developed the ability to see through his lies, so it would be best not to anger him too much. Especially not at this time.

You (3:42 am): nightmare

Iwa-chan (3:42 am): oh

Iwa-chan (3:42 am): that sucks

Iwa-chan (3:43 am): do u want to call me?

Oikawa chuckled. He didn’t imagine Iwaizumi to be this considerate.

You (3:43 am): aww no thx

You (3:43 am): talking to u cheered me up already <3

Iwa-chan (3:44 am): then go back to sleep

Iwa-chan (3:44 am): u need all the beauty sleep u can get shittykawa

You (3:45 am): !!!

You (3:45 am): i am speechless

You (3:45 am): this is next lvl rude

You (3:45 am): i have u known that i already got scouted for various model agencies

You (3:46 am): sth u can only dream of

Iwa-chan (3:46 am): sounds like u r fine

Iwa-chan (3:46 am): now sleep

Iwa-chan (3:46 am): goodn8

You (3:46 am): good night iwa-chan!!

You (3:56 am): thanks

On Sunday, Oikawa decided to stay in. He could only handle so much social interaction and the last night with Aiko depleted his energy completely. He didn’t set an alarm and slept in. When he woke up at about noon, the sun was shining through the half-closed blinds.

He groaned. Still sleep drunk Oikawa pulled up his blanket over his head and sighed. It took him another 10 minutes to peel out of his cocoon and fished for his cell phone. To his surprise, he got a message from Iwaizumi.

Iwa-chan (10:15 am): u got lectures tomorrow?

You (12:23 pm): good morning to u too

You (12:23 pm): one in the afternoon

You (12:23 pm): y?

Oikawa closed the messenger app and scrolled through his social media pages to have a small update but when he saw everyone having a good time, his mood was soured and he pushed himself out of his bed. He took his time in the bath, made himself a generous breakfast and sat down on his couch to watch something, anything, while eating.

His phone lit up after some time and flashed ‘Iwa-chan – 1 new message’ over the screen. Oikawa didn’t bother with the TV and unlocked his phone to see the message.

Iwa-chan (1:09 pm): got some time tonight?

You (1:10 pm): iwa-chan

You (1:10 pm): r u asking me for what i think u r asking for?

Iwa-chan (1:10 pm): what are u

Iwa-chan (1:11 pm): hell no!

Iwa-chan (1:11 pm): i already regret asking

You (1:11 pm): u didnt even wait for my answer!!

Iwa-chan (1:12 pm): ?

You (1:12 pm): of course id like to spent my free evening with u iwa-chan!!

Oikawa already learnt that spending time with Iwaizumi didn’t cost any social energy and he could spent all his time with him. He kind of hoped it was the same for Iwaizumi as well.

Iwa-chan (1:12 pm): it would be late

Iwa-chan (1:12 pm): there is a meteor shower at about 11:30

You (1:13 pm): !!!!!

You (1:13 pm): iwa-chan!!!

You (1:13 pm): yes!! where?

Iwa-chan (1:13 pm): the forest behind my apartment

Iwa-chan (1:14 pm): there is a clearing and we could get a good view

You (1:14 pm): u r an angel <3

You (1:14 pm): I bring blankets

You (1:14 pm): and food

Iwa-chan (1:15 pm): sure i bring flashlights

Iwa-chan (1:15 pm): and sth warm to drink

You (1:15 m): cant wait!!

You (1:15 pm): see u ton8 <3

Iwa-chan (1:16 pm): see ya

Oikawa felt giddy. It was one thing meeting Iwaizumi at the cafeteria about every day and another meeting with him in the dead of night to watch the stars. Sometimes even he could have some luck.

He finished his breakfast with a great appetite and right after he looked for some food he could make and bring for tonight. He looked through his fridge and cupboards and after some online research, he decided to make some sandwiches, sausages, some vegetables, and rice.

Fortunately, Oikawa had everything at home and could get to work right away. The sandwiches had different toppings, some had cheese, some had tuna, and some had meat. He wasn’t sure what Iwaizumi liked so he prepared a bit of everything. The sausages he cut in and when they were roasted, they curled up and formed small octopus. For finger food, Oikawa cut some cucumber, carrots, and tomatoes.

When the rice was cooked, Oikawa wanted to fill it in their bento boxes but at the last minute decided differently. He found some leftover nori leaves and tried forming onigiris. It didn’t work as easy as he thought, but he was satisfied. He grinned to himself.

Their bento boxes were ready, and it was only early afternoon. Oikawa groaned. The time was crawling so slowly, it drove him nuts. He packed his bag with some blankets and everything was ready in front of his door, if only it wasn’t just past 5 pm.

The next two hours, Oikawa spent sitting on his couch, watching TV and checking his phone every other minute. These were some very, very long hours. But, alas, the time finally reached about 10 pm and Oikawa sprung up. He decided he’s going to be fashionable early at Iwaizumi’s apartment and then they can go together.

The bus drive to Iwaizumi took about 20 minutes and about 10.30 pm Oikawa stood in front of Iwaizumi’s apartment, ringing the doorbell obnoxiously until Iwaizumi’s voice growled through the intercom.

“Stop it, Shittykawa.”

“Aww, how did you know it was me?”

“Only one person that can be this annoying with just ringing.”

But even though there was a small bite in his voice, the door buzzed open and Oikawa chirped “Thanks!” before entering the apartment complex.

When Oikawa stood in front of Iwaizumi’s door, he realized that his palms were a little bit sweaty and with a confused look on his face, wiped them dry on his pants. He knocked on the door and when Iwaizumi opened, still with a small scowl, a smile found its way naturally to Oikawa.

“Good evening, Iwa-chan. Don’t you want to invite me in?”

Iwaizumi sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’m beginning to regret this”, he mumbled but, again, despite his words stepped aside and beckoned Oikawa with a nod to come inside.

Iwaizumi’s apartment was pretty much what Oikawa expected. It was a one-room-apartment with an open kitchen to the living room. It was small but enough for one. There were no unnecessary items, no décor, no plants but it was mostly tidied up and everything had its place.

“You’re early.” Iwaizumi remarked as he put a flashlight into his backpack which looked already packed as well.

“Nothing to do anymore. And then I had the brilliant idea that I could come over in case you’re bored.” Oikawa roomed through the small space and inspected everything with curious eyes, to which Iwaizumi crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.

“Y’know, people text each other to ask stuff like that beforehand.”

“Where is the fun in that? I surprised you!” Oikawa exclaimed and beamed at him.

“You sure did.” Iwaizumi sighed. “Well, if you want, we can either spent another half an hour here or can go outside already.”

Oikawa was inspecting the awfully small bookshelf and cocked his head to one side.

“Let’s go outside. You have nothing fun here anyway.” With a spring in his step, Oikawa darted away from Iwaizumi who was already on the verge to throw a punch outside the door.

Oikawa stifled a laugh and walked slowly towards the stairs, slow enough for Iwaizumi to catch up. Iwaizumi was dressed similarly to Oikawa with a scarf and a hat but instead of a coat an oversized hoody which looked as comfy as it was warm. Oikawa tried not to stare too obviously at how cute Iwaizumi looked in it.

They stayed quiet in the staircase since it was already late and despite Oikawa gladly stir up some trouble, he wouldn’t want Iwaizumi to get noise complaints.

Outside, Iwaizumi tucked on Oikawa’s sleeve and nudged him around the apartment complex which was right in front of a sinister looking forest. Oikawa swallowed hard.

Iwaizumi huffed what could only be interpreted as a laugh and Oikawa shot him a glare. Ostentatiously Oikawa walked in front of Iwaizumi through the trees and adjusted his course when Iwaizumi tucked again at his sleeve.

“Wanna hold hands?” Iwaizumi teased behind him and Oikawa pushed his hands into his pockets.

“Well, if you’re afraid because it’s dark or something, I could consider it.”

“I’m not the one who’s afraid.” Iwaizumi mumbled under his breath which Oikawa pretended not to hear.

When an owl, however, flew up the trees, flapping its wings rapidly and “Uh-hu” ’d, Oikawa jumped a little only to get Iwaizumi bumped into him.

“Oi…” Iwaizumi started but was interrupted by a flustered Oikawa, babbling out: “I’m not afraid! You are!”

For a second, Iwaizumi reconsidered but shook his head to himself. Without looking at Oikawa, he grabbed his hand and now led the way. Oikawa was too startled by this action that for a moment he didn’t remember to move or to breath, for what matters.

He stumbled behind Iwaizumi, eyes fixed on their hands which gradually got warmer and with a defeated huff, Oikawa squeezed their hands together. Iwaizumi didn’t look back, but he didn’t let go, too.

They probably walked for only about 10 minutes which felt like hours to Oikawa. For one, because he was so fixed on their hands, which felt oddly good. Then again, it was cold and it slowly crept through their clothes and Oikawa just wanted to wrap his blanket around him.

As if his prayer was granted, the trees opened up wide and a small clearing appeared. Oikawa’s eyes went as wide as the moon that illuminated their way and gaped at the sky, which was clear and presented its stars like there was nothing else in the world.

“Wow.” Oikawa whispered. It felt wrong to speak too loudly in this setting, well, at least for him.

“Oi, blankets?” Iwaizumi shuffled his feet to warm them up and his face was already red from the cold.

“Ah, yes. Wait just a second.” Oikawa had to tear of his gaze from Iwaizumi’s red cheeks and fumbled with his bag. He pulled out one thin blanket to sit on and two thicker ones, which he handed to Iwaizumi. It took them less than a minute to spread the blanket and bundle up in their blankets beside each other.

For a while, they sat in silence, neither uncomfortable nor forced. The sky was clear and their little space between the trees felt kind of sacred, so they didn’t want to disturb the silence.

At least, until the cold crept into their bones and Iwaizumi pulled two flasks out of his bag and without looking at Oikawa mumbled: “Didn’t know if you liked tea, too. You’re always drinking coffee but I thought … y‘know, tea fits this a bit more.” The last bit was one word muttered together and Oikawa felt already warm inside without anything to drink.

“You’re so thoughtful!“ he grinned. “Then we start with tea and when we’re getting tired, not me just for your information, we can switch to coffee. Sounds good?“

Iwaizumi nodded and pulled out two mugs as well, in which he poured in the hot liquid.

“I only had green tea, deal with it.”

“As long as you didn’t put in any sugar.” Oikawa took the offered mug and blew at the steam. His fingers finally felt alive again.

“Why would somebody do that?” Iwaizumi cocked his eyebrow as he poured himself a cup of tea as well.

“Good answer.”

They both blew on their tea and sipped it occasionally, burning their lips but neither complained. A few minutes later, Oikawa put down his mug and pulled out of his own bag two bento boxes and with a slight blush on his cheeks gave one to Iwaizumi.

“Just some snacks … I didn’t know what you liked. And my first try to make some onigiris, feel honored!” he exclaimed. Without looking at Iwaizumi, he opened his own bento box and his face fell a little.

The onigiris weren’t formed properly, so after being pushed from side to side with the other food, they fell apart.

“Well, that calls for some more practice.” Oikawa looked over to Iwaizumi and started to say: “You don’t have to--”

But Iwaizumi was already in the process of pressing the onigiris together some more and ate them. When he felt Oikawa looking at him he turned to him, his cheeks stuffed.

“Whaff?“

Without warning, Oikawa burst into a fit of laughter. Relief and the view combined made his eyes tear up. Iwaizumi narrowed his eyes and had to hold both their mugs out of danger of Oikawa’s trembling body.

„You’re so dumb.“ Iwaizumi shook his head and gave Oikawa his mug back when he whimpered his last bubble of laughter and swept away some tears.

“Says the right one.” Oikawa giggled and earned a slap on the back of his head but it lacked power, so he just yelped a reflexive “Ouch!” but it didn’t hurt at all.

Just when Iwaizumi was about to say something, the first yellow stripe flew above them. They both jerked their heads up and within seconds, a next meteorite flew through the sky. And the next one. And the next one. And then there were a few next to each other and they illuminated the sky like flashlights.

In awe, Iwaizumi and Oikawa forgot to eat and drink for a few minutes and just stared until their necks were stiff. They started slurping at their tea and snacked on their food and every so often when an especially long tail on a meteorite flew above them, Oikawa breathed out an excited “Oh!” or “Ah!” He didn’t notice that when that happened, Iwaizumi’s eyes rather looked at his face than at the meteorites.

For about half an hour the meteorites showered above them and it grew colder by the minute despite their hot drinks and without really noticing, they scooted over to sit nearer together. So, when the meteorites finally faded back into the night sky and they grinned at each other, their faces were so close they almost touched each other.

“Uhm…” Oikawa’s heart stuttered for a second and his usual eloquent self showed its worst side.

Iwaizumi’s eyes glanced down for a split second, but of course, Oikawa noticed and finally broke his stare and skidded back a few centimeters. Iwaizumi cleared his throat and took another sip from his now empty cup.

“Well … that was amazing!” Oikawa ignored what just happened and stared at the sky. “Just amazing!”

Iwaizumi nodded in agreement. He wasn’t one who cared about such things, but he had to admit it was nice to see something like this in person once in a while.

“Yeah, it shuts you up pretty good.” Iwaizumi shrugged.

“Iwa-chan! Rude!” Oikawa gasped in surprise. “Can’t you just say something nice for once?” he pouted.

Iwaizumi continued plucking on his sandwiches and stayed silent. Oikawa sighed and finished his drink. There were just two sandwiches left so he grabbed one and took a huge bite from it.

“I like spending time with you.”

Oikawa almost choked on his food and his head spun around, he almost got whiplashed. Iwaizumi kept his eyes on his hands which were just pulling bread and letting it fall to the ground.

“Iwa-chan …” Oikawa swallowed. “That’s wasting food! If you’re not going to eat it don’t just throw it away!” Oikawa tried to grab Iwaizumi’s sandwich.

“What?!” Iwaizumi, on the other hand, just hold his arm upwards so that Oikawa didn’t reach it. They both had slightly red cheeks but ignored it. “I’m not … what? No, I’m not wasting anything?”

“You just threw bread away!” Oikawa pointed at the crumbs on the blanket which were now scattered all over it.

“I’m … oh. Sorry.” Iwaizumi scratched the back of his head. “Didn’t realize I was doing that.”

“Hmpf.” Oikawa pouted and continued eating his sandwich but this time with a smile on his lips.

They stayed there for about 20 more minutes, finishing their sandwiches and then staring at the sky for a little bit longer until the cold finally won and they packed their stuff. Again, Iwaizumi lead the way with his flashlight followed by Oikawa. He noticed after some time, that Iwaizumi’s free hand was always pointed towards Oikawa. Another smile found its way on Oikawa’s and stayed there for the rest of the way.

When they arrived at Iwaizumi’s apartment complex, Iwaizumi shouldered his bag to the other side and fumbled at its straps.

“So, uhm, are you getting home alright? It’s pretty late already.”

Oikawa blinked and finally pulled out his phone to look at the time. “2 am?!” he almost yelled. Time flew by like nothing. Oikawa smacked his own forehead.

“Well, yeah, no. The last bus was at 1:45.”

Iwaizumi nodded slowly and nodded at the building. “Wanna stay over then? I mean, you’re welcome to walk home or to take a taxi.”

Oikawa arched an eyebrow. “If you’re already that courteous, don’t end it with being a dick!” But despite his words, Oikawa couldn’t help but grin and walked towards the building. “But yes, I’m gonna take that offer.”

They walked upstairs to Iwaizumi’s apartment, which Oikawa once again, eyed dismissively and earned another hit against his arm.

“Are you gonna be picky, now?”

“No, no!” Oikawa held up his hands, laughing nervously.

“Hm.” Iwaizumi disappeared in his own room shortly and came back with a pillow and a blanket which he unloaded on the couch.

“Don’t even think about asking for the bed. Do you want a shirt to sleep in?” Iwaizumi shot Oikawa down who was already opening his mouth in protest.

“Uh, yeah, a shirt would be nice.” Oikawa placed his own bag against the couch and hung his jacket up on the wardrobe. Iwaizumi came back with one of his shirts and threw it in Oikawa’s face.

“There you go. Bathroom is there”, he pointed at the door opposite to his room, “if something’s wrong try to solve it yourself first and then wake me up.”

“Iwa-chan, charming as ever.” Oikawa giggled. “Don’t worry, I won’t disturb your beauty sleep.” Oikawa earned another scowl from Iwaizumi.

“Good night, Shittykawa.”

“Good night, Iwa-chan.”

Oikawa waited for a few more seconds after Iwaizumi went into his room before he exhaled. Why was he so tensed up? He shook his head and changed into the other shirt and threw his clothes over one of the chairs.

The couch was comfortable to some degree and he was thankful, that it was rather warm in the apartment and the blanket and pillow were almost as fluffy as his own. Another warmth spread out within him and Oikawa stared at the small coffee table in front of him.

His eyelids were heavy, and he felt sleep coming, but this strange warmth kept him awake for some time. This will be a problem for his future self.

The next morning came way too fast and the sun shined through the thin curtains, waking Oikawa up. It was still early, so Oikawa, a rational human being, bombarded Iwaizumi with text messages, that he is, in fact, awake and bored.

It took about 5 minutes until Oikawa heard some dull steps and then Iwaizumi’s door was pulled wide open.

“Assykawa.” Iwaizumi growled.

“Oh, you’re awake, too? What a coincidence!” Oikawa grinned his dazzling smile but then had to run away from Iwaizumi who chased him through the whole apartment.

The rest of the morning was rather calm. After they finally settled, mostly Oikawa admitting defeat after Iwaizumi pushed him outside the balcony and closed the window, they had a hearty breakfast with coffee, rice, eggs, vegetables and a little bit of meat.

They ate in silence, took turns with the bathroom, changed and then Oikawa headed home. It was almost domestic.

On his way home, Oikawa felt the same warmth in his chest again but he couldn’t place this feeling anywhere. So, instead of really thinking about it, he put it into a box and pushed it deep inside his head where he never had to think about it again.

------

After this day, his heart ached in shorter intervals than ever. Oikawa hooked up with girl after girl, made them fall for him as fast as he could and after about a week the pain already came back. It made Oikawa panic a little bit.

Normally, he could live with it for a few months without problems and now he burnt through all his contacts in two months. Between his hook-ups, he met up with Iwaizumi on a regular basis. They spent more time together, eating lunch at the cafeteria, studying at their apartments, went to the cinema or shopping. And every second, Oikawa felt this warmth and the pain was gone for a little while.

Of course, Iwaizumi, as well as Hanamaki and Matsukawa, noticed Oikawa’s increase of dates and the shortness of these girls. But whenever they asked him about it, Oikawa just made excused and was pretty evasive about the topic. Since he didn’t know what was going on either.

Until.

Oikawa was sitting with Hanamaki and Matsukawa at one of the tables at the back of the cafeteria when Iwaizumi walked inside followed by some girl. She held his hand and smiled at something he said.

All three of them saw it this instantly and both Hanamaki and Matsukawa grinned while Oikawa froze up inside. Literally. His chest cooled off so much he almost choked.

Iwaizumi let go of the girl’s hand and pointed at their table and she nodded. She went to the front desk while Iwaizumi made his way to them. When he came up to them, his cheeks were burning red, no matter how hard he tried to calm his nerves.

“Aha?”

“Ahaaa?”

Iwaizumi both shot them a glare which they just ignored and kept staring at him.

“Th-that’s Harumi.” Iwaizumi ignored that he just stuttered but it didn’t go unnoticed.

“Your—

--girlfriend?” Hanamaki finished Matsukawa's question, both with a disgusting smile on their lips.

Unconsciously, Iwaizumi’s eyes found Oikawa’s and he swallowed.

“Yeah.”

Oikawa didn’t know what to do. It didn’t happen often that he was totally at lost at what to do or what to say. So, he smiled. He just smiled the most bright, dazzling, fake smile he could muster.

“Congrats. Finally growing up, I see.” He slurped at his coffee and ignored his burnt tongue. It wasn’t what he wanted to say anyway. Better shut up.

“Uh, yeah.” He sat down next to Oikawa and a minute later, Harumi walked up to them a little shy.

“Hi, guys.” She waved at them and sat down on the other side next to Iwaizumi, handing him a coffee.

“Thanks.” Iwaizumi took the cup and his thump nervously played with the lid.

The rest of the conversation went by in a haze for Oikawa. He recognized Harumi from their group date a few months back and couldn’t hate himself more. He had introduced them basically.

He kept slurping his coffee and answered question mostly with a nod or at least as short as possible. He didn’t trust his brain at the moment.

20 Minutes went by as if they were days and Oikawa finally stood up. “Gotta go. It was nice meeting you, Harumi-chan!” he said brightly and nodded to the other guys, and without looking at Iwaizumi walked to his next class.

Or at least wanted, a few moments later, Iwaizumi caught up and kinda cut off his way.

“Hey.” His hands were pushed deep into his pockets.

Oikawa blinked and grabbed his cup a little more tightly. “Iwa-chan? What’s the matter? It isn’t nice to leave your girlfriend alone with your friends. You know, Makki and Mattsun are gonna ask her very personal question right now.” He talked without thinking. He didn’t want to hear what Iwaizumi was about to say.

“Yeah, sorry, I just”, his eyes roamed the room, “y’know, I’m sor—”

“Don’t.” Oikawa interrupted him. He knew it was too hasty, and his voice broke a little. “Don’t be, Iwa-chan. You can do whatever you want and, contrary to popular believe, don’t have to report back to me.”

Iwaizumi nodded and finally looked at Oikawa. They stared at each other in silence for a few seconds until Iwaizumi nodded again.

“Yeah, uhm, have fun at your lecture, I guess.”

“Thanks.” Oikawa walked outside, or rather, fled the scene. Outside, he had to take some deep breath to push back the stinging tears in his eyes. Why would he cry? Shouldn’t he be happy for his best friend?

-----

The next weeks were hell. Whenever they met up, Harumi was part of them. It was like Iwaizumi couldn’t do anything without her anymore. She practically lived with him already and it made Oikawa sick.

At first, he tried to be nice and just accept it. Tried to be nice to her, to make her laugh, to make Iwaizumi not feel sorry anymore for whatever he thinks he had to apologize for. But it was so, so exhausting.

Every time, Oikawa came home tired and burnt out. There was nothing left, that could help his aching heart. It hurt almost every day. Not the pain he felt when his heart craved love but some other pain. And nothing, just nothing, could sooth it anymore.

He grew distance. He couldn’t bare seeing Iwaizumi and Harumi together anymore. He made excuses when they agreed to meet up, buried himself in his books and his sport. Running away was something, he was pretty good at.

At one morning, it was pouring cats and dogs and Oikawa was already awake at 5 am, sitting in front of the window and watching the rain, when his phone lit up.

Iwa-chan (4:58 am): U awake?

Oikawa considered ignoring it for the moment but, like so often, he couldn’t just ignore Iwaizumi.

You (4:58 am): Good morning! Since when are you an early riser??

Iwa-chan (4:58 am): since u made it ur goal to always wake me up at this godforsaken hour

You (4:58 am): the early bird catches the worm!

Iwa-chan (4:59 am): the early bird can fuck itself

You (4:59 am): Iwa-chan! Language!

Iwa-chan (4:59 am): whatever

Iwa-chan (4:59 am): …

Oikawa looked at his phone, knowing that Iwaizumi didn’t just text him for fun. And he dreaded what was coming. He didn’t want to talk about anything.

Iwa-chan (5:01 am): can we meet up today?

Iwa-chan (5:01 am): just us 2

You (5:03 am): why? dunno if i have time

Iwa-chan (5:03 am): I know you have time

Iwa-chan (5:03 am): we need to talk

You (5:03 am): about what?

Iwa-chan (5:04 am): about you

Iwa-chan (5:04 am): and the way ur acting

You (5:04 am): ??

Iwa-chan (5:04 am): don’t give me that

Iwa-chan (5:04 am): u know exactly what i’m talking about

You (5:05 am): sorry iwa-chan

You (5:05 am): maybe some other time

You (5:05 am): gotta go

Iwa-chan (5:05 am): don’t you dare

Oikawa locked his phone and threw it on the couch. This was something he couldn’t deal with right now. He exhaled deeply a few times but his racing heart wouldn’t calm down. He grabbed a thin jacket and put it on as he walked outside. He needed to get whatever this was out of his system and nothing worked better than a run. Even though it was pouring.

As soon as he stepped outside the front door, his hair and shoulders were soaked. He made a grimace and grumbled under his breath.

The first steps were just light walking to warm up but he soon was running at a fast pace. He sure wasn’t running away, not him. No.

He made a turn to the right on the next crossroad and about 10 meters in front of him, Iwaizumi was on his bike.

Iwaizumi hit his breaks and Oikawa sprung to the side and both stopped next to each other.

“What the-? Are you crazy?!” Iwaizumi almost shouted at Oikawa. “Get inside, you’re gonna catch something in this rain.”

Oikawa looked at Iwaizumi’s wet hair and soaked clothes. He must have texted him on his way here. His lips almost curled up to a smile. But he didn’t.

“Same to you.” Oikawa shrugged and was about to continue his run when Iwaizumi grabbed his arm, stopping him.

“Don’t you dare walk away from me.”

“Iwa-chan, I can do what I want, you’re not my mom.” The fake carefree tone of his almost made him vomit. Iwaizumi probably thought the same, judging by his face.

He got off his bike and leaned it against the brick wall, still holding onto Oikawa as if he could run away as soon as he would let go.

“Tell me what’s going on. You know, I can’t read people, let alone minds. Especially not yours.” The last part was more silent and coated with something akin to hurt and it clenched at Oikawa’s heart.

“Nothing’s going on. You must imagine things.”

Iwaizumi shot him a glare. “Don’t fuck around, Oikawa.”

“I’m not.” Another shrug. “I have a lot on my plate right now, so, I’m sorry if I rubbed you the wrong way.”

Iwaizumi shook his head. “No. You’re not the same. Since I”, Iwaizumi swallowed, “since I started dating Harumi, you’re distant.”

When her name fell, Oikawa clenched his jaw. He didn’t want to hear Iwaizumi say her name with affection and what not.

Oikawa snapped his arm back. “I’m not.” There was nothing but defense in his voice and Oikawa knew, there was nothing he could say to convince Iwaizumi otherwise. He turned around and walked back to his apartment. His skin was finally feeling the coldness of the rain.

Iwaizumi was not having any of his shit. He took his bike and shoved it into Oikawa’ back.

The rain poured down on them and Oikawa could laugh at the utter ridiculousness at the situation. He turned around and stemmed his hands into his hip and glared at Iwaizumi.

“Now what? Are you happy?!”

“Why would I?! You are making a big deal out of it!”

Oikawa gritted his teeth and looked up at the sky. Frustration, anger, jealousy … Oikawa couldn’t place his feelings that were all over the place and it made his eyes sting. He wasn’t sure what was rain and what were tears that were streaming down his face and he didn’t care.

“Yeah, well, I don’t want to! But you-“

“I what?! Huh?” Iwaizumi raised his arms, tossing his bike to the side. “Yes, I went out with this girl. You do it all the time!”

He was right. Oikawa was painfully aware that Iwaizumi was right, but he just didn’t know what to do. He just wanted to get this out of his chest whatever it was. He looked back at Iwaizumi and he couldn’t tell if Iwaizumi cried as well. Did he ever see him cry? All he could tell was the poufy eyes and the red nose.

Oikawa was about to say something when time seemed to slow down for him.

Ba-dumm.

It was then that he realized. He looked at the deep brown eyes, that were looking at him so furiously but hurt at him. The usually spiked up hair that was drenched with rain and hung down sloppily. The hands that were clenched to fists. Every little detail, Oikawa absorbed at that moment.

And the little box he stored away in the back of his head, snapped open. He couldn’t deny it anymore and he finally, finally, realized all his feelings. The warmth, the pain, everything.

“I’m in love with you.”

It was only a whisper, but he knew Iwaizumi heard it.

Ba-dumm.

Iwaizumi’s eyes widened. Oikawa looked at them growing bigger than ever and almost saw that inside of Iwaizumi the same box sprung open and his eyes filled with tears and warmth and everything good. Oikawa almost felt it oozing out and unconsciously his hand reached out, he just wanted to hold Iwaizumi right now. Nothing more.

The next moment, Oikawa’s chest was filled with so much joy, warmth, and utter happiness, he never felt in his life before. He felt whole.

Iwaizumi’s hand loosened. The brown eyes, that were just looking at him with a glimmer in them, went dull. And Oikawa knew. He stole Iwaizumi’s heart.

but the world didn’t love them.

#Haikyuu #Haikyuu!!#HQ #IwaOi #Oikawa #Iwaizumi #Oikawa Tooru #iwaizumi hajime #fanfiction #college AU #first love #slow build

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