#i'll ask them when i feel better

[thronealigned]

no it's fine this mind flayer is totally my friend and 100% honest with me all the time it's ok it likes me everything's so normal

#bg3 spoilers #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #i love how raphael directly calls you out on this. 'if id have known you were so gullible i wouldve tricked you into selling your soul for #a bowl of beans when we first met' #and then just keeps insulting you more if you keep insisting emp's really your ally #oc: impulse #sure this'll go in their tag #everything about impulse's Thing with the emperor is so funny to me. and then deeply fucked up if you think about it long enough. and then #really funny again if you think about it even longer #one day i'll do their 2.0 playthrough so i can fully form all my thoughts. and get better screenshots and the ceremorphosis ending #i mean there's nothing stopping me from loading an impulse 1.0 save and going ceremorphosis from there but idk it'd feel wrong #impulse has more tadpoles in their brain than synapses by act 3 and it does really fundamentally change them as a person #tfw your chaotic neutral act-first-ask-questions-never no-impulse-control 17 CHA bestie becomes one of the most detached calculating people #you've ever met. all their old casual wit and humor is still there but they think before they speak now and that really shouldnt feel as #sinister as it does. they have this look in their eye and it feels like they view everyone around them as lesser beings #not because they view other people as subhuman or worse than they are but because they view themself as something *more* #if they have any raw unfiltered emotion left you haven't seen it in weeks. there's one person(?) who gets Unrestrained Feelings privileges #and it's the fucking illithid that lives in their mind and not any of their actual non-monster normal-ish-person friends. that human #connection is fading so fast now. when did they change so much? it happened so slowly in the moment but suddenly now they seem like they #were never the person you became friends with at all #and like impulse is a pretty selfish person from the start but they *did* genuinely like and care about the rest of the party. they were #friends. and by the end of act 3 that friendship should be the deepest and most meaningful it's ever been. but. it just isn't. #so on and so forth etc etc like that. All That Bullshit makes their relationship with lae'zel so interesting (and upsetting) too #they encourage her to side against vlaakith and then they never even try to free orpheus for her and her people's sake. they never even #think about it. they never consider it as an option. they just don't care. and then they EAT HIS BRAIN. #very possibly RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER. #and she's just left adrift. a rebel with no rebellion to lead and very little hope #i'm unwell. #ok i'm done this is a silly meme post. but god i have so many thoughts i have barely been keeping contained

[transmechanicus]

Really fucked up that two ppl can care about each other and make their best efforts to communicate and still end up hurting each other so badly they cannot stand to be in the same room.

#my stuff #i feel soooo bad talking to my therapist about the same topics over multiple weeks #like i feel like they're sooo sick of it like damn can this bitch get Over It alreadyyyy #hi yes actually can we talk about the near catastrophic sense of betrayal and loss that has haunted my soul for over a month? #can we talk about how I overcompensate for other's possible feelings and emotions to desperately mask my terror at feeling out of control #can we talk about how even when I know ppl acted with logical reasons necessary for their situation it still hurt me? #and that this pain fills me up with so much anger and frustration that I'm powerless to put anywhere that won't hurt someone #so it just cooks me inside and makes me grind my teeth constantly for weeks #im so angry i did not deserve to be treated like this it's not fair and I have no capacity to fix it or control when it feels better #i just have to survive and wait until i forget about it and hope they don't decide to reach out and fuck it all up #cause i can see that happening #i'll finally be free of thinking about them and generally going about my day unbothered and they'll ask to get coffee or something #and I have no idea what I should do in that scenario. because I don't think we can be friends. #and you have not treated me with the compassion and warmth I treated you #i would want to say mean things. hurtful things. I would want to bite back for once. #and that's not me. that's not who I want to be. #i don't wanna see you. go away. don't talk to me if you're not going to make the pain go away.

[cerise-on-top]

Hiya! May I ask for a fluff alphabet for Price, if you haven't done that already. Since I saw in a recent post you only do 8-9 letters at a time now (which is okay!), may I specifically ask for: A, B, C, F, G, H, N, & Q? Thank you! 💗

Hey there! Sure you can! I've been in the mood to write something for Price anyway, so this came at a good time ^^

Fluff Alphabet for Price

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

On the one hand, he really loves going out to do something with you. Something along the lines of the occasional short hike, taking care of your shared garden or even just taking a stroll through the city, taking in all the sights and finding new ones you weren’t previously aware of. Those are things he likes to do when he’s been home for a while now. However, if he’s gotten home not too long ago then he’d much rather just stay in and sleep a little bit. Will want to cuddle you or just have you be his background noise. Don’t be mad at him if he dozes off while you’re watching a movie together, he’s just extremely tired and needs that rest.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

He admires how resilient you are. Price knows that life isn’t easy, that it always makes an effort to throw one impossible thing after another at you, but you never seem to give up. No matter how rough life gets, no matter how often it knocks you down, you always get up, dust yourself off and continue to smile. Even if it really took its toll on you, you strive to make your life better. Although it may get you down when you’ve had the worst day of your life, you still won’t stay down forever. You do what you can, and that’s what Price loves about you.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

When you’re sad he’ll give you a hug, provided you’re okay with it. He’s a very good hugger, his hugs are very comforting and warm. Afterwards he’ll put on your favorite movie or series and watch it with you. If enough time has passed and you still feel down, then he’ll cook something you really like. Although he knows he can’t make the sadness go away forever, he’ll try to temporarily cheer you up. If you need to talk, if you need some advice, he’s also your man. If you have a panic attack then he’ll try to calm you down by taking you to a location with few people. Price can talk for a while if he needs to, so he’ll ask you to focus on his voice. Might also give you a rather simple task to take your mind off of things, such as counting backwards from 100.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

If it’s you, then he would forgive pretty easily, as long as it’s not something too big. If you accidentally knock down a mug he likes, then he might sigh and be annoyed, but he’ll forgive you. If you cheat on him, then he won’t. He’s usually calm and collected, even while fighting. Sure, he could be aggressive towards you and snap at you, but he loves you, so he tries not to. It’s sort of obvious when he is annoyed, his sentences become much shorter and he’ll actively try to get away from you. Won’t yell at you, won’t do any erratic movements either, but if he’s too angry then he’ll simply walk away from you until he’s calmed down.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Yes, he is aware and he is very grateful. How could he not be? You have the patience of a saint when it comes to him. He knows it’s rough to be with someone who is part of the military, he’s away more often than not, but you still decided to stay with him. You cook for him when he’s tired, you draw him a bath when he’s sore, you reassure him when he feels like you deserve better than him. You’re so much more than what he deserves, he doesn’t feel like he could ever repay you for everything you’re doing for him. He tries, though, but it’s never enough. Price could give you the universe and it wouldn’t suffice.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Aside from the obvious, such as military intel, he doesn’t really hide anything from you. Price doesn’t see the point in keeping secrets from you. You’re together, aren’t you? You deserve to know just about anything about him. He might not tell you everything from the get go, but once you’re close enough you can ask him about anything. You wanna know about his time as a private? Sure. How he came to be a captain? Yeah, he can talk about it. Just ask and he’ll likely tell you. But in the same vein he hopes that you trust him enough to tell him just about anything as well.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

He doesn’t really use very many nicknames. Just the classic ones, such as “love”, “sweetheart” and “dear”. Sometimes he feels the urge to call you “sunshine”, but he usually represses that since that’s what he’s called his soldiers before. As much as it would fit you, he tries not to bring work home. He likes to call you by your name too, though. But aside from that there’s nothing he really calls you.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

He can keep calm in just about any situation, so he won’t lash out on you. He has an air of authority to him, so it’s not too often that someone is being a dick to him. And that extends to you as well. Price is a well respected man, so not very many people will come up to you and demand something from you. You, too, will be respected by most people, he’ll make sure of that. Regardless of whether you’re shy and timid or loud and boisterous, no one will bad mouth you. Price can fight, he will protect you. He will also fight for your honor if he needs to. He may have self restraint most of the time, but no one should ever talk badly about his partner.

#cod #cod x reader #john price #john price x reader #I didn't think I'd receive any more requests for the fluff alphabet but I don't mind either #I think a hug from Price could heal broken bones #okay that's an exaggeration but I do believe that his hugs would be so very healing. he's warm he's tall he's strong #what more could you possibly want? I've been talking about hugs again a lot as of late haven't I? but I just can't help it they're so good #I hate it when men touch me but I'll make an exception for some of the cod men. I am just so touch starved #some praise from Price would also make me feel better. just a small “you're doing so good love” and I could keep going #I've also commissioned someone to draw Price for me. once I have the full tf141 set I'll post it #I already asked her to draw Ghost and Soap #now only Price and Gaz are missing #I asked for the four of them with a turtle each. turtles are just such cute and precious little creatures #definitely my favorite animals. I wish I could give one a little kiss on its head. but alas there's salmonella to worry about #anyway Price with a turtle. cute. show stopping. very much needed in my life #I don't care about canon they will be turtle owners and love and care for them. they will build them nice things and take pictures #they send each other unsolicited turtle pictures

[jerich0two]

How do you feel about al's VA confirming that Al's aromanticism isn't yet decided on?

Fairly neutral, I'd say! I'm pleased his asexuality has been completely, 100%, bonafide, guaranteed, confirmed, because it's a big win for the ace community -- it'd be disappointing, but I don't expect I'd mind that much if it turns out he isn't aro.

Then again, it's pretty strongly implied that he is, and I don't really like how vague Viv is about it. Al's her character and she gets to decide what aspects of him she wants to reveal (makes sense!), but like I've said before, I think she does it partly for shipping purposes. Honestly a nice sentiment, but Alastor is one character out of a veeeeery large cast (comparatively), so avoiding confirming his aromanticism because it might "ruin people's fun" or whatever the logic may be is a bit dodgy. What about the AROS' fun, huh? Huh?! /lhj

(Addendum)

TLDR for the addition: Viv was much more mild about her original "let people have fun shipping" statement than I thought, and said she would prefer that people have more respect for his identity (the actual quotes are listed in a transcript found in that reblog). Nevertheless, she (at least 3 years ago) placed shipping above confirming his aromanticism /neu

#hazbin hotel #aroace alastor #alastor #jeri's ask tag #apologies for the lack of art lately! I've been busy and when I do get free time I've been working on ideas for my OCs instead of Hazbin #but if anyone reads these tags #feel free to drop some (sfw) Hazbin-related requests into my ask box and I'll see whether I can get around to them! (no promises) #(i know better than to make deals with the hazbin fandom /j)

[miabrown007]

going crazy about kaz brekker hours

#HE'S JUST *screams into a pillow* #Inej wants him to be better she NEEDS him to be better and shed his armour and be emotionall vulnerable and honest to her #and every time he tries it life delivers a right hook into his solar plexus and knocks him to hell and back #and time and time again he is made to come to the incorrect conclusion that being vulnerable and soft and caring about anyone ever #is a mistake and a weakness that he isn't allowed that he doesn't deserve #and his only way of getting what he wants and keeping the people he loves safe is if he becomes something that can't love them #like life just continues to punish him for having any kind of feelings #and he can only love them if he kills the part of himself that loves them. like COME ON MAN #i'm literally unwell about this kid (KID HE'S FUCKING 17 LET HIM LIVE) #someone sedate me (well actually don't i need to start reading CK tonight) #Kaz I Am Ruin And Ruination Brekker #and it's so tragic because he has come such a long way during SoC and when Inej asks him to be hers you know he can't do it. he would like #to but he's unable of it like his walls are still built up so high. #and it's fair of her to ask because she needs that and keeping her always at arms length is not viable of Kaz but also that's all he can #currently give her. that's his all and it's not enough and my heart is breaking for them ohmygod #they make me think so much of felonies love square I'LL EAT GLASS #okay. anyway. finished six of crows. i'm normal about them. #mia's reading

[mastersoftheair]

Sorry but am I the only one that thought that episode…sucked? Like it was straight up bad. Horrible pacing, no wrap up of all the random characters and plot lines they’ve thrown around all season (the tuskegee airmen, Westgates spying, literally all the guys beside like the main 4). (Seriously it makes me so mad that the three redtails got all of 5 seconds of screen time, almost no lines. Literally what was the point of introducing them other than to pretend the show was iNcLuSiVe) Even at the end of BoB and the Pacific you get a much better idea of what happened to all the remaining guys. In this they’re like what happened to DeMarco or Hambone or Brady or (insert character here) we don’t know! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The concentration camp scene felt shoehorned in compared to how it was done in BoB. Unless that actually happened to Rosie (which i haven’t heard anything about) but it was just like.. ok? It all felt so rushed and emotionless to me. Maybe I’ve just fallen out of love with MoTA but it’s been downhill for me since episode 6 or so.

i already made a little (read: long) post-finale write-up here, where i talk about the use of the tuskegee airmen, l'sandra, and overall editing/pacing issues i felt the show had. but i don't agree with the notion that adding the redtails was in any way insincere or trying to halfass being "iNcLuSiVe", i just think they suffer from this show's obvious time constraints. and to summarize what i wrote in my linked post, there's a limit to what white writers/directors/producers can do when creating a story about black people. there are some stories i'd feel uncomfortable with them telling on their own, truth be told. dee rees wasn't the sole nonwhite director, but she Was the only black one. i think she did her job well given the limitations and i appreciate that they let her direct those episodes, rather than leaving it up to a team of white people trying their best to tell a black story.

the worst i can say about the finale is that it didn't feel like That strong of finale, tho i wouldn't go as far to say it "sucked" or call it "straight up bad". i liked it plenty, it's just the weakest of the hbo war finales imo.

as for the concentration camp scene, artistic license was taken with both shows. unlike what's seen in the BoB, easy company wasn't the first to arrive at kaufering, and there's 0 mention of the all-japanese american 552nd who helped them liberate it). similarly, rosie rosenthal did assist in liberating those camps, though it would've been after the events shown this episode. idk if he saw one in that up-close way seen in this episode, but he could've (i should research this when i have time). plus, it would've felt weird Not having him acknowledge them at all. "shoe-horned" is an odd term to use here imo, as both scenes more-or-less center a jewish character (BoB's liebgott and MotA's rosie). the former show has survivors the characters can help, the latter shows no one left to help. the former has all of easy company there, the latter has rosie there all alone. rosie's scene felt deeply personal in that way. at the end of the day, both scenes are communicating different things. that doesn't make one better than the other when they aren't trying to be identical. (disclaimer, i'm not jewish, so i'd be interesting hearing from the perspective of someone who wrt whether or not they felt it was "shoe-horned")

i can understand if you've disliked the show post-episode 6 (and episode 6 was a very strong episode i'm ngl). eps 7 and 8 were weaker in many ways, even to me, so i get it. everyone's entitled to their own opinion (i'd be a hypocrite saying otherwise). just understand that this blog is run by someone who overall enjoys this show despite its flaws! basically, i encourage you to take this energy and make your own posts.

#masters of the air #hbo war #e9 #asks #long post #masters of the air spoilers #mota spoilers #all the hbo war finales are different. i don't think MotA's is as strong but like #my fav hbo war show is still BoB and even Then i don't think it has a better finale than TP. and i dislike a lot of TP! like A Lot! #and Even Then we don't get a good idea about what happens to a lot of the minor-er characters in TP once they leave #anyone who isn't sledge or leckie (rip basilone) is hand-waved-'they went home'-away #not every show needs a sandlot ending w/ a voiceover going: #'[NAME] got really into the [INSERT DECADE] and no one ever saw him again' like they did to webster (rip webster) #and again! i'm mixed about the redtails. but i can Very Clearly See this show getting released without including them #which wouldve left many people (justifiably!) upset that they weren't shown when they were Literally there in the same pow camp #i'll give the hbo war team a lot of shit about a lot of things (despite the enduringly positive energy i try to keep up here) #but i Have to give MotA props for Trying. i don't see faux inclusion i just see it as not quite hitting the mark but an attempt was made #and i think that's worth Something given neither BoB or TP bothered trying #(like i think there was a missed opportunity in TP not mentioning what's happening to japanese americans on the home front) #this got away from me (i'm also opinionated) but while i can agree with you about how the show feels rushed #i do take issue with the idea that they were pretending to be inclusive. i'll blame money time and covid19 before i blame bad intention #maybe that's controversial here but it Is my blog. so.

[imminent-danger-came]

Hi I’m also an avid httyd 3 hater I think this video was a pretty good summarization of most of the things that were wrong with it if you wanna check it out

https://youtube.com/watch?v=bcFMEs177i0&feature=shared

"The director wanted an end from a different story". SO FUCKING TRUE. SO REAL.

From the httyd3 art book (which I'm so happy the video references):

"In general, it's more difficult to create a female character than it is to draw a male. For a female, any incorrect line and the shape can go wrong very quickly. We had to control all the shapes while keeping her both powerful and graceful so that she didn't fall to much into the reptilian category, like a lot of dragons. We wanted to explore how the Light Fury would walk and how to make her feel like a female, so we referenced lionesses and big cats."

What misogynistic bullshit am I right.

I'm going to go ahead and also show off the hearts on the light fury's forehead because it's just abysmal (this is a normal picture of the light fury with the saturation increased):

Thanks for sending this video my way anon!

#I'm only 25 minutes in and I am going to finish it #can you even believe. this movie smh #OMG THIS PERSON IS POINTING OUT HOW TOOTHLESS ALREADY DEVIATES FROM THE REST OF THE DRAGONS #LIKE DESIGN WISE #HE'S WAY SMOOTHER THAN THE REST OF THEM #NOT AS SPIKY #HOLY SHIT I AM IN LOVe #I've said it once and I'll say it again: toothless is already a round dragon #And they then took that dragon. And wanted to make it ''rounder'' so it could be ''feminine'' #Like hello #Stormfly and Meatlug are right there #*ahem* my apologies I have a lot of feelings about httyd3 (dragons if you see this look away) #httyd #httyd3 critical #asks #when. when the first two movies are about building a better world TOGETHER and the last movie is. the opposite of that #hahahahahahahahahahaha #*kisses httyd1 & httyd2 on the forehead* ilu you guys so much #I don't entirety agree about this person's view of httyd2 but I also totally respect her opinion I get it #Different interpretations and all that #(<- will defend toothless becoming the alpha as a parallel to hiccup becoming the chief until the end)

[spocks-kaathyra]

.

#vent #wow I will never be able to let myself have friends huh #I am unwanted and inherently unwantable #I have it all figured out I just can't DO anything right. why is breaking silence the hardest thing to do #I can't bring myself to make/maintain/deepen friendships bc I'm convinced that I'm unpleasant to be around and unpleasant to be friends with #my company is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy #<- completely unjustified belief. I am kind and friendly and capable of responding appropriately in the majority of social situations #they reach out and I shrink back every time. no matter how much they reach towards me I can't believe that they actually want me around #and ofc the reasonable thing for them to do is stop reaching! when I never reach back! why would they expect a different outcome this time #so I can't blame anyone. I can't sit around waiting for a saintly mindreader who can see that my actions contradict my feelings #I know I just need to reach out. but how could I do that when I'm convinced it'll only hurt them? #my presence makes their day worse. I'm a mangy dog begging for scraps I don't deserve at their table. I am harming them with my presence #how can I beg for their attention and company and time when I know their life would be better without me in it #<- false belief. when I reach out I make them feel wanted and they feel more comfortable reaching out to me when they know I like them. #everyone appreciates being reached out to. I am pleasant to be around. they like being liked by me. my company is a desirable thing #company in general is a desirable thing. my company is better than no company. people like being liked. #logically I know all this to be true. emotionally? they hate me and I deserve it and the more I show I like them the more they'll hate me #sigh. what a banal problem to have. I'll stop being 18 years old one day. I can't wait until I have better things to worry about #replies appreciated. btw. in the interest of asking for what I want instead of expecting ppl to read my mind lmao #narcissus's echoes

[lovesickgoose]

Bear with me re: your asks. I'm feeling generally Very Bad at the moment

#pretty sure someone gave me covid and that's what the illness i got mid december is #I've got basically no energy or focus at the moment #as my rule regarding answering asks has always been: I'll get to them when I get to them. thanks for your patience #don't feel like you have to say get better soon or anything. im just saying this so people know I'm not ignoring them🫡🫡 #not scribbling

[unreadpoppy]

Saw a video and it got me in a mood so i'm making this post.

I don't think people who have never been fat knows how fucking hard it is to find clothing for bigger bodies.

The first issue is finding stuff in your actual size. Because time after time after time and time again I've gone to a store and they only had small and medium sizes. Not even large. And this was not for a few clothes, no. It was for MOST clothes that I found interesting. And then the ones that were marked as large were simply not big enough.

And I know that the reason for that is that brands simply won't make clothes for fat people. It's that because it surely isn't because the large size is selling out fast. They just don't do it. And some people have the nerve to say 'well brands are not obligated to make sizes for everyone' yeah sure, but also, I can't walk naked on the street can I?

Like I don't get it. 'oh but we want our clothes to fit a especific body' so fucking make clothes that are supposed to fit bigger bodies. Doesn't have a to be a whole ass collection.

And then we get on the second problem which is making clothes for plus size people that are ugly as hell. It's always the same stuff: ugly florals, animal print that belongs in another decade, cold shoulders, that weird extra fabric at the end of a shirt to hide the belly, or just black/muted colors.

Like fun fact. If you have big boobs, the hardest thing in the world is trying to find a bra that comes in a color that isn't white, black or beige. Because trust me, I've spent 3 hours walking in the shopping mall and I couldn't find anything that fit my breasts that was like pink (and in that situation I needed a pink bra for a play).

It feels like most clothes made for plus sized people are designed with like 50+ year old white women in mind, and not even that demographic of people are wearing those clothes (my mom is a plus sized 50+ year old white woman and often talks about how ugly some clothes made for people her size are).

It's hard trying to develop your own sense of style when none of the clothes around you are in your size, and when they do, they are just not good looking to you.

But you wanna know what's the down right worst part? Do you know what fucking brand has clothes that look good and are amde for bigger bodies?

The goddamn cancer on this earth that is Shein.

I fucking hate shein. Fast fashion is killin the fashion industry, they literally have people working as slaves and many influecers buy shein clothes by the bulk only to then throw it in the trash. Shein is awful.

But. Unfortunetly, shein is the only place that I found that had clothes that fit me and looked good. I don't like that. I avoided buying from shein for the longest time ever, but jesus christ, when you can't find clothes anywhere else you get desperate.

I tried looking for other places. I tried looking at my local clothing stores and everything was too small for me. I tried looking at online small bussinesses but they either didn't make my size, or it was sold out, or the prices were very high. Tried looking at thrift stores, also didn't find my size.

I try not to buy too much from shein or to spend long periods of time in between buying, because again, I feel bad about buying there. I don't want to buy from there.

Clothing brands/stores gotta do better. And I don't think that's asking for too much.

#this is less polite as i usually am because i'm so fucking tired of this shit #like these brands make probably millions every year #why is it apparently too much to ask for clothes in bigger sizes???? #like idk i think everyone should be able to buy clothes that fit them and look nice??? #and like god i don't want anyone to come on here be um actually it's very hard for the clothing industry to be inclusive #bc this post ain't about that #this post is about how frustrating it is to find clothes when you're fat #and also don't come for me bc of where i'm buying some stuff from ok #i feel so fucking guilty every time i buy from there #and like my friends buy from shein like every other week practically #i usually buy from there every 6+ months or so #and it's usually like a dress or two #at least i know that I don't throw clothes in the trash #if there's something here or there that doesn't look amazing but it's workable i'll go to the seamstress #if it doesn't fit me at all (which is a risk that can happen with online shopping) i donate it #and i will wear clothes until i can't wear them anymore #and even when i can't wear them anymore they they are usually still in a good enough condition that i can donate it to charity #or to someone close to my family who might give it a better use #this is a very big rambling sorry about this it's just aaaaaaaaa #i probably should go sleep

[polarisbibliotheque]

Little Updates! + Music-Fics-Requests

Hello my dear angels, devils, humans and in-between creatures of the day and the night, I hope you are all doing wonderfully :)

So. I'm still behind on my writing/posting schedule because, to put it very mildly, I've been going through a breakdown hahahaha last month, it was my birthday which I don't quite enjoy, and a few days later my dad suffered an accident - and that, my dear cryptids, triggered chaos and crisis in my life HAHAHAHA

I used to be a skeptic of the earth-shattering powers of Saturn's Return when you reach your 30s, but lo and behold, it didn't take Saturn even a WEEK to make itself known

My dad is fine health-wise, but it was quite traumatic for me and I'm still trying to figure things out regarding the repercussions of everything that happened. So, things have slowed down a LOT when it comes to EVERYTHING in my life while I'm trying to put it all back into place.

I'm tip-toeing around the details 'cause I really don't want to openly talk about it, like I said, still going through the motions

I DO WANT TO WRITE THOUGH, I MISS IT.

I've said it before, writing is my therapy. I'm finishing last year's Vergil Halloween special, and I will be posting soon, I hope.

But I've been wanting to do the music writing thing again! SO!

For now, I'm gonna take my last year's Spotify Wrapped playlist as I've done before, but I want to add some songs didn't make the cut last year Ghost I'm staring at you, so I'll just make a playlist for writing here, with a bunch of songs I think would be nice/fun/interesting for the Spardaverse HAHAHA

SO! HOW ARE WE GONNA DO IT?

Just send me an ask, with a number and a character - just remember, I write Dante and Vergil with y/n s/o and Nero with Kyrie.

For now, I'll be doing just the three of them, but if you are an unhinged little fella and suggest something with another character that ends up having an interesting song attached to it, I might write it as well, ask at your own risk *side eyes*

Let the memes come

That's it. I just wanna go back to having a little fun with writing again and once I'm stuck again in survival mode after all that happened in the last couple of weeks, this little music game might help ^^

And it might be fun for you too! Oh, do put something like "hey, it's for the music-fic ask" so I know what's about as well! I might get lost on my asks forgive me

Hope to write a lot more so I can get back onto my bigger projects soon, like Nemesis and Survivor's Blood! I won't give up on them, I just need some ~time~

Hope to see you guys on my asks!!

#polaris speaks #update #life update #writing update #music fic requests #I've to come up with a better name for that #also don't worry too much about me #I don't do well with feelings and oversharing them or even sharing #so the best thing I can do for now is getting back into writing I think #eventually I hope I'll figure things out #(that dean line 'if someone else asks me how I'm feeling I'm gonna start throwing punches' is real) #(this man raised me to be tough and go through the motions when I was a teen HAHAHAHA he's here for a REASON xD)

[cxpperhead]

Like all snakes, Copperhead sheds his skin several times a year. It's an uncomfortable experience and one where he'll secret himself away in one of his many hideouts until the process is over and done with. After shedding, his scales become much more vibrant for a time so it's easy to tell when he's freshly shed therefore operating at peak health.

#🐍 || headcanons #🐍 || musings #Gonna whack out yesterdays asks while I can! #Thank you all for sending them <3 #It's ya gorl's b-day today so I'll try and be here instead of AWOL #Still got work later tho bleh #Tried to get the week off but was denied #Might try and get a week off soon now it's September #Have not had any holiday this year!! #Copperhead has obligatory shedding days off tho #Feels so much better when that old skin comes off

[gxlden-angels]

Do not stop talking about Palestine. Do not forget about Palestine. This is not a battle of religion and I do not think it should be treated as such. From the river to the sea, they will be free 🇵🇸

Disclaimer: I am not an expert. I am just some guy in the US. I am not a direct source of information. Please listen to Palestinians. Please help them directly. Please help with protests if your country is supplying Israel with weapons like the US.

#but wait there's more #it may take a while for me to gather my thoughts so not immediately #I have so many thoughts specially about holy land experience type shit #my personal belief is that Palestinians should be given back their land #Israel will become a part of Palestine and would receive full citizenship #and all of them will be treated as equals #Aid will go to Palestinians as the country and rebuilt as much as it can be after so much tragedy #Since the idea of Israel was to have a protective Jewish state #I think the better option would be for the world to agree collectively to be a place for refugees #if there's another situation like the holocaust #all refugees should be given that opportunity to escape #there's so many conspiracies against Jewish people which is why I think it needs to be declared by countries to protect any Jewish person #that is fleeing antisemitism in their current country #it doesn't need to be a Jewish state especially with so many Jewish people being pro-Palestine #and living outside of Israel #I know people currently living in Israel and I want them to be safe #And they will be if their government just lets Palestinians live #but yea later on I'll talk about the holy land experience thing I'm pissed about rn #I feel like I haven't said enough on the blog. I have terrible OCD where I'll ruminate about this until I panic #I do not want to be a source of that for others so I encourage you to educate yourself without ruminating #It does not help Palestine to shame yourself and others for not being able to do a specific thing #So instead I ask you to look it up when you are able to and do what you can #I usually do the daily clicker and I wanted to join my university's protests but couldn't #since I was the only one working my job which is monitoring the queer safe space on campus #and I didn't want to close that area just in case it was need by protesters or queer students #just found out today ppl at my school will be expelled if caught so that's why it's at the front of my mind rn

[its-captain-sir]

oh my gosh, genuinely- PLEASE tell me about your turtles/zelda crossover

YESSSSSS I HAVE BEEN ENABLED ok ok ok so. don't have any explanation for Why it happens but the turtles end up in Hyrule at some point before the calamity. They're not together when they arrive, but rather split up amongst the four major regions. I'm sure you can see where this is going as to me drawing connections between the turtles and the champions hakdhskdjs I'm still missing a lot of the plot reasoning for all that to make this a truly solid au idea, right now it's kinda just been me thinking about who would be best matched with who, though it does get a little more complicated than just magically appearing in front of a champion and going from there

Meeting Mikey is point where it all sorta starts in my head. It's actually Zelda and Link who run into Mikey first on their way to Gerudo Town! He's just kinda been wandering the desert for a day or so after getting turned away from the town, and up until this point he actually has no idea that he's in a different universe, he honestly thought there was some kind of portal mishap and he ended up by another hidden city somewhere else in the world. Getting everything actually sorted out is a bit of a mess, but Zelda promises to help him search for his brothers, he and Link become cooking besties, and then they have him tag along to meet Urbosa. These two I paired together mostly because I felt like their powers of fire and lightning complimented each other well, and Mikey's chains might just be fast enough to help prevent something later on...... :)

Raph ends up in Goron City! In the hot springs more specifically, as it's the only place protected from the heat as Death Mountain becomes more active. Luckily Daruk was out and about though, so he finds Raph pretty quick before he spends too much time alone and takes him back to the city to get fireproof elixirs and eventually a custom fit set of fireproof armor. Raph has a BLAST with Daruk and they definitely spend a lot of time sparring (without having to hold back too much!) and showing off their different protection powers! Eventually though they do set off towards Hyrule Castle hoping someone there will have the answers to how Raph got here and where everyone else is.

Leo ends up in the Hebra Mountains and his first meeting with Revali is Absolutely Horrible. for Revali. Kinda like Mikey, Leo was on his own for a bit wandering around, except he ran into wayyyy more monster camps. Just bokoblins so nothing too bad, but it does mean his new motto becomes stab first talk later which makes for a bit of an issue when he runs into a Rito patrol spearheaded by Revali. They think he's a monster, he thinks they're monsters, it's a mess hdkdhdkfhd just as he's about to enter a really serious fight with Revali he finally gets clued in that these are People rather than monsters, so he drops all pretenses in his usual manner and backs off instantly and Revali's just left scrambling like "what." And really it only gets worse for him from there cause here's yet ANOTHER blue coded sword wielder except this one. this one tries to be annoying to him on purpose. Leo has absolutely no qualms about throwing all Revali's bullshit right back at him and pesters him beyond that just for fun (he's just similar enough to Donnie that Leo knows alllll the right buttons to press). Revali wants to get rid of him right away, but who knows, maybe Leo's portals would be enough to make a difference in the final hour if Revali had him on his side.......

Donnie is the only one to appear right in front of a champion right in the middle of Zora's Domain, so there's no escaping meeting Mipha hskfhskdhsj she's very nice to him though! And he likes how thoughtful she can be and that she's not overly loud. There's also something to be said about being long ranged weapon buddies <3 it's honestly just a very nice match up that quickly comes to be built on a lot of respect for each other, and so Mipha is the one who offers to accompany Donnie out of the domain and to Kakariko Village where hopefully the researchers there will have some answers (but Donnie will have fun exploring their whole entirely new form of tech regardless hskdhskdjs and he definitely becomes close with Robbie and Purah)

Eventually everyone heads back or gets redirected to Hyrule Castle and an actual reunion can happen! As for what happens after that point.... I don't know really. The only other ideas I've tossed around are how the blight fights could potentially go if they all had a little extra help on their side. If anything, I think this crossover would be in a similar vein to hwaoc, just not as easy and without time travel forewarning hskdhskdhsj it's something to keep thinking about though! Thank you for indulging me in my ramble cause I really do have so many thoughts and ideas about this hakdhskghsj

#i had also tossed around the idea a bit of the turtles disappearing right as ganon appears and showing up again 100 years later #when link's by himself and kind of guiding him while there even though he doesn't remember much of them #and idk i probably could do something with them confronting all the failure in the world they weren't even there for #and assisting link with the divine beasts to help everyone find a sense of closure #but idk i just think i can do something better with their purpose for being there #eh I'll figure it out eventually hsjdhskdjs #ANYWAYS if you made it to the end of all this thank you for listening and feel free to ask more questions <3333 #loveeee getting to talk about this idea :) #rottmnt #breath of the wild #asks? #jastertown

[sevicia]

That year I also wasn't eating much and the day we went on a field trip I hadn't eaten for two days and felt really weak and sick (DUH) so when I was walking from the bus stop to the school entrance I had to lean on a building to throw up and people looked at me like I was some sort of abomination. If you're not gonna help me then don't look at me damn

#that being said when I almost fainted on the bus and had to get off before my stop #an old lady bought me candy and two girls from another school asked me if I was okay #I was like (dying) ''yes I'll be fine I called my mom'' #when I think about them it literally makes me feel better about people in general. #diary #emeto #ed mention #ed m

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: March 26

"Songs About Rain" by Gary Allan

#song of the day #you might think that this is the opposite of 'Groovy Little Summer Song' but nope! closer to same because (drumroll) #they are one of the very best categories of thing: Country Songs About Country Songs #I love them. I adore them #'Songs About Rain' is one of the strongest and best examples of type I have (also 'Cheatin Songs' by Midland. impeccable) #'and it sure ain't easin my pain / all these songs like / Rainy Night in Georgia / Kentucky Rain #Here Comes That Rainy Day Feelin Again / Blues Eyes Cryin in the Early Mornin Rain #they go on and on and there's no two the same / oh it would be easy to blame / all these songs about rain' #what a gift. what a delight. legitimately hard to sing this song in a mournful voice because it makes me so damn happy #anyway as you might glean from how this is posting at 3 pm my time: my sleep schedule is /fucked/ #I did have part of the bad conversation with my boss on Monday (immediately followed by garden times #which so overtook me that I spoke only about the garden and good spring feeling in my song post. what a blessing the garden is) #but mostly what happened is I said 'hey it is technically possible for me to make this but it will not help it will not do anything useful' #and my boss said 'but you can make it' and I said 'yes but we shouldn't. it will be a waste of time' and she said 'make it by Thursday' #and I said 'I absolutely cannot make it by Thursday. if I finish instead this better thing I've already been working on--' #and she said 'no we don't care about that thing. make part of the useless thing. by Thursday morning' #and I said 'if I bring you part of the useless thing and part of the good thing and I directly compare them in front of you--' #and she said 'we'll look at whatever you have Thursday morning but it's the useless thing we care about' #so the meeting is scheduled and I'm going to plead for the life of my better thing and probably the best I'll get is permission to do both #which is. I mean the useless thing is going to be a time-waster for sure but at least it won't be actively detrimental to anything? #it'll be fine I'll make it be fine. the inherent problems of when your boss doesn't actually know what you do for them I guess :/ #(also maybe. maybe if it comes down to it. maybe I'll just make the good thing for myself and use it to make my own life better #and someday maybe they'll ask for a project that works and then I'll be able to dramatically unveil it but either way I'll benefit from it #hmm maybe yeah)