#i'll never be done crying

[kahootqueen69]

really looking forward to the filler episode where Joel and Ellie go back and have lunch with Bill and Frank in the front yard and they’re all fine and dandy and having a good time together!

#the last of us #the last of us hbo #bill x frank #ltou bill #tlou frank #artists on tumblr #digital art #fanart #stuff i draw #the last of us spoilers #man i'm fuckign-- #they occupy all of my brain rn #soon as i watched this episode (and got done crying) #(just kidding i'll never be done crying over them) #i got started on this #feeling absolutely insane in this arby's tonight

[crimeronan]

having dinner with my dad tonight. gripping the sink staring into the mirror muttering "fear of the thing is worse than the thing itself fear of the thing is worse than the thing itself fear of the thing is worse than the thing itself" as if that's gonna prevent a resurgence of post-traumatic nightmares. WOW i don't want to do this.

#i'll keep you guys posted on whether i get through it without crying and/or throwing up. that'll be a win. #then i'll have done my due diligence and never need to see him again. #negative

[its-a-me-mango]

Hi Mango! Liz here, I just wanted to say that I love how amazing your arts are and I'd love to see more of it if you ever post another one ^^

- ☆ @lizaluvsthis

LIZ FROM VARIOUS SMG4 PROJECTS, AU'S AND JUST EPIC ART IN GENERAL??!?!?!?!??!??!?!!

WHAT THE HELL, HI!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR STOPPING BY AND LIKING MY STUFF, I'M A BIG FAN OF YOUR ART SO HEARING FROM YOU IS SO AWESOME!!! Don't worry I'm cooking up a few things right now so there's no stopping me from posting soon bUT THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN FOR YOUR KIND WORDS WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

#SMG4oc: Mango #mangos mystery ask box #Might be my favourite image of Mango crying that i've done so far and i've done a lot of them #you're all so amazing and nice and i'll never get over it

[peridots-pixiwolf]

sketches from @mipexch 's whiteboard a couple days ago!!

also feat. a very small reference to @onlineviolence :]

#peridots-art #bugs #bots #ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #swordsmachine ultrakill #bugzapper ultrakill #minos prime ultrakill #v2 ultrakill #plus the rest of the fumos but those weren't done by me. someone was drawing v1 so i put a v2 beside them and came back later to like 5 mor #hence why they are out of frame. anyway this was a LOT of fun I lost track of time and stayed up till dawn even #there were so many cool and/or recognized artists.... i keep checking the ultrakill tag to see if anyone else posts their own sketches #it was posted at like 2am my time though so i didn't get to stay very long.... i checked in today on the fumo drawings and there was #just so much new art over there and in general. so many people doodling and having fun and complimenting each other and bonding over #the things we all like. im gonna cry #anyway. i think this is the longest period of non-posting (not inactivity. lol) on tumblr i've ever had #so might've forgot some tags. also i think i'll use alt text for multiple images and regular id for 1-2 #edit also i wrote 'today' in the tags up there but it was in fact two days ago. regardless #ALSO. sorry if the alt text is hard to read or anything. never used it before + penchant for lengthy descriptions #can you tell i'm really proud of the beetle gabe btw. men will see a character say 'anyone gonna buggify that?' and not wait for an answer #WAIT i've already made that joke haven't i. whatever turn your blorbo into an insect or some sort of gay bug today

[fantastic-nonsense]

one surefire way to kill me stone dead at any given moment is putting the opening lines of the Revenge of the Sith novelization in a photoset

#matthew stover opening that fucking book up with 'this is a greek tragedy. you are reading a book where everyone dies #this is a story about the fall of the jedi and the murder of thousands. nothing can be done to change it. you are reading the end' #just makes me go INSANE every time I think about it #it makes me want to pull my hair out #it makes me want to scream and cry and shout about the injustice I'm about to witness #which. of course. is the whole point #I love him for it and I'll never forgive him for it and god if that isn't the experience of someone doing justice to the Purges as a writer #matthew stover #revenge of the sith #star wars #rots

[ravi-617]

🧡

#無職転生 #無職転生 ～異世界行ったら本気だす～ #理不尽な孫の手 #rifujin na magonote #mushoku tensei #jobless reincarnation #zanoba shirone #juliette (mushoku tensei) #light novel #my art #I love them....so much.... #never in my life would I have expected zanoba to end up being one of my favs LOL #mushoku is constantly ~subverting expectations~ #the day julie finally appears in the anime.. I am done for #there better be a whole slew of fan art of these two this year #I'll cry

[katyspersonal]

It is only first month of 2024, and I've already lost not one but two subjects of nightmares, paranoia and reoccurring emotional torture. I really wish there was another way to get rid of these besides having extremely painful conversations.. but at least these scars are closing, one by one

#/vent #personal #and this time was like.. opposite of the previous one #previous one absolutely wrecked me with very ugly insight and basically made all puzzle pieces fall together #this one was just pain and crying and having my worst suspicions about other person AND self faced and confirmed #but again it got solved #I really want the power to move on without having a closure. #I hope I will be strong enough for it one day. #I just need to think.. #I think I really should avoid other depressed/traumatised people until something can be done with how I react at perceived threats #(which is eternity because hell I know when I will be able to afford therapy. probably never with how my life situation is going) #as jarring as being close only with 'healthy' people would be I just can't make things worse for both me and them #until I can change my default response from aggression into avoidance I'll just stay away from anyone with depression #I say very terrible things when I feel threatened and it is way too easy to make me feel threatened. it is THE easiest thing in the world. #I won't survive without close friends anyhow but there is category of people that can't recover from these words normally #I mean I am ALSO this 'category'. I also hurt from awful words thrown at me for MONTHS don't I #it is very hard to be aware of my glaring flaws when everyone that points them out is outright malicious and wants me bullied off the Earth #and then everyone who does think I deserve my human rights either doesn't see my flaws or doesn't mention them #so at least discussing it without outright intention to harm me was helpful for a change #maybe one day I'll have a friend that can be open if I've hurt them a lot so I can work on it but that's another story I guess

[criscura]

I wish I wasn't so exhausted and I could make more art.... I even planned out a whole prompt-a-day month for Saigenos/Genosai, TWICE, but the first time no one seemed like they could participate when I asked about it, and the second time I friggin lost the damned plan. I could remake it a third time, but I just....I don't know.

I've been really struggling to get along for a while, and I think if it didn't hit it off--or even if I just got really productive and it seemed like I was reaching crickets--I'd be so incredibly discouraged that it would bring me down even further. It usually takes my stuff a few months to a year to get reach, and that really doesn't do anything for me when I need the support immediately.

It's not that I don't have a billion ideas for so many different things, but my battery has been taking longer and longer to charge up and it's been running out faster and faster, and it's been like this for....a year?? Ish?? Maybe longer, I don't know.

I wish I could just stop needing so much fucking time to bounce back.....

#written from my bed as I'm almost crying from exhaustion and hopelessness #I'm PMSing and I had a really tiring day so i know this feels worse than normal #but when you've been struggling to fall asleep for months because waking up means being disappointed in yourself #for everything you failed to do the day before and everything you know you're going to fail to do again today #it's really hard not to feel like shit about yourself #trying to be constantly hopeful but never living up to your expectations #and then the few times that you do you completely crash for days #and then the only way to not crash is to have your big accomplishment be 'i went to the gym' 'i took a shower' 'i answered a message' #and just. again #to have the be the way you're living for months and months and months #it's so embarrassing to admit how little i can do and it makes me so ashamed knowing how much I've done and see what everyone else around me #is constantly doing #and then when i do share things it just kind of dies off because I've been too exhausted to maintain most relationships #which ALSO makes me feel like absolute fucking shit because i think people think i just don't care about them #when it's really that it takes me hours to get out of bed and I'm lucky if i remember to eat before 4 #and I hate so much of myself and see it as such a huge waste of time that it uses up almost all the energy i have to take care of myself #but if i don't do it I'll just hate myself even more #i know i keep on complaining about this but I'm. I'm trying to fix it #i have BEEN trying to fix it actively for so fucking long #but it's.....i think I've stopped believing anything i do has significant worth and it makes it hard to keep trying #and i know people will read this and say take something for it but when you're only interactions with medications and drugs #are one experience that scarred you so bad you didn't go to the doctors for ten years and one experience so bad #that you couldn't even explain it at first without HARDCORE disassociating #it's hard to convince yourself that anything will ever be any better and that it won't make everything intensely worse for years

[cubicpeebles]

I have been re-attempting Enot, and I've actually managed to get to Chimney Canopy!

It is actually one of the easier places to be, as you have infinite yeeks as either food or lizard bait, though it sucks that you kinda have to use them to do anything (if you don't have a yeek you get exhausted after a single jump, which makes moving around miserable. Luckily, they spawn every time you leave a pipe. Except when they randomly don't. It is very inconsistent).

I have not managed to get to the echo tower spawn yet though. The combination of unfair creature spawns, and guaranteed pre-cycles (which forces you to move to a new shelter every cycle in the rain, in a region full of open spaces and bottomless pits. It is totally super fun.) has made consistently staying at max karma very difficult.

#yes I am actually trying to beat enot's campaign #I am either very determined or insane. Perhaps both. #I was tempted to just turn off pre-cycles but I decided not to. #This is like the Path Of Pain of rain world. Yeah it probably isn't worth it at all but I'm still gonna try. #Even if just for the sake of knowing I managed to beat it #Though I never actually did beat path of pain. it made me cry a lot. anyway. #I've started working on the Enot Soft Fuzzy Man animation thingy #So far it is just a few basic sketches but I have actually started it! #I don't know if I'll ever finish it but hopefully I will! #I really hope there aren't any super yeek fans here. I've killed like hundreds of them. #for some reason they have a habit of clipping into the floor. #like 40 percent of them have done that

[kimchokejin]

Tagged by @seoksao to do the "which character" personality test and post my results and honestly thank you so much for tagging me this was so fun because i'm obsessed with comprehensive personality quizzes (shocker) and i got a bunch of my coworkers to take it too and i loved seeing everyone's results! i could fit my top 46 in the screenshot so that's what you're getting

i could also see which character i was like from specific shows so they're not on the list but i was also similar to eric from that 70s show, jonah from superstore (a callout), peeta from the hunger games, and reid from criminal minds <3

Tagging: don't be nervous you can do this @courtthisdisaster (if you wanted to post it!), @blueside-hobi, @cheekyquokka, @hopeinthebox, @mutedstring, @not-so-secretly-mairon, @stardiviner13, and anyone who sees this!

#tag: i'm it! #seoksao #courtthisdisaster #blueside-hobi #cheekyquokka #hopeinthebox #mutedstring #not-so-secretly-mairon #stardiviner13 #i haven't done this in so long sorry if the tagging doesn't work #if you've already been tagged just message me i'll tell you where i live so you can come punch me in the face #i thought charlie swan at number 1 was the funniest possible result until i saw the guy from ratatouille was an option #dr. james wilson is also a callout. for me and all my fellow type 9s #i watched degrassi religiously and idk why i scored so high for connor the ONLY storyline i remember from him was the panty raiding #why yes i do have an excessive amount of repressed internal rage thanks for asking #i don't agree with my score for ann perkins but i sure am flattered! #i've never seen arrested development but i immediately knew i got michael cera #please never ask me to make a decision. i'll cry #the text is all different sizes but fixing it seems complicated #if you're reading this you should probably drink some water <3

[claitea]

finished the dlc! enjoyed it a lot :D

#clai speaks #i'll talk abt it in tags so dont open these if you havent played #first of all. no other mentions of unova at all other than the mention that blueberry academy is located there ok </3 #not a big deal ofc i just. really like unova if you couldnt tell HJSBDHHD #actual story was great! its no main story but it didnt need to be. sv's story was already brilliant the dlc didnt need to save it for me-- #--like swsh's dlc saved its main game in my eyes. ily calyrex shoutout to my buddy calyrex #lots of little details added like borders for menus that matched your location or phone case and chairs for your picnics!!! #always a sucker for minor aesthetic changes thank you pokemon #carmine made a bad first impression but i warmed up to her i like her a lot :) #kieran...... :( poor guy #weeping sobbing crying about the fact that the last protag sees of him is him crying and running from them #never have i been so upset that i dont have full control of my characters actions within the story #the way carmine and protag kinda just... dismiss kieran so protag can catch ogerpon #talk to him he's distraught!!!!!! he's gonna turn sour in pt 2 no!!!!!! kieran!!!!!!!!!!!! #also speaking of ogerpon. little guy :) very very cute love its mask gimmick #i named mine Kino after the xe/noblade nopon bc i cant think of anything else But a nopon when it keeps saying Pon lmao #also!! sinistcha!!! love how it uses a whisk as hair. also Matcha Gotcha has to be one of my favorite move names now #i'll get around to catching enough pokemon for perrin eventually i'm done for tonight #in summary teal mask was very good i'm very pleased :)

[kh-marriage-material]

From the maker of literally no other tournament or battle or anything (so please be nice I've never done this before) comes…

Kingdom Hearts Marriage Material Tournament

Who HASN'T seen at least one character in Kingdom Hearts and gone 'I want them in my life. I want to show them how wonderful they are, and how much I adore them, and how good life can get when you're spending it with someone you love. I want to fold laundry with them and grocery shop with them and do taxes with them. I want to go on little dates with them. Maybe I even want to have kids with them, or help them take care of their children. I want to be a part of their family.'?

Okay well if you haven't, get thinking. This tournament is all about that sentiment. Who is the ultimate Kingdom Hearts waifu(gender neutral)? And why is it Terra?

Thank you to @fuckable-kh-men-battle for the inspiration!

Follow the form below to submit the person you want to marry. Anybody who's been featured in a Kingdom Hearts game is a viable option! This includes Disney and Final Fantasy characters, but I will favor ones who are original to the KH universe. We'll see how long it takes to get enough different submissions, but the form will be available for at least 24 hours. Once I have enough I'll close off the form and create the bracket.

#kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts poll #kh marriage material #kh marriage material tournament #please reblog! #i've never done this before so be nice #if you aren't nice i'll cry and then you'll FEEL BAD

[mrs-theirin]

grabbing my period by the throat. leave me the fuck alone

#rambling #vent #i have been super extra uber emotional this cycle #and it's pissing me the fuck off. #i hate being that 'god sorry it's my period' person but AAAAAAAAAA #i'm so stressed and the littlest things piss me off and i'm just so miserable #i wanna go home but i have two more fucking hours here #and then i have to fill up my tires #and i'm tired and it's gonna be cold and i've never fucking done that before!!! #what if i do it wrong. what if i fuck it up and fuck up my car because i'm too dumb to put air in them #i just wanna cry so bad but i'm still at WOOOOORK and i'll be trapped here FOREVER #with these dumbass stupid confusing calls and angry customers #and shit idk how to do yet. blarg

[youremyonlyhope]

why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up

#i'm overthinking something that i did and was told off for doing by my director #and on my way home i was thinking when was the last time i was even talked to like that during a production #and then i remembered the costume experience from hell of only a couple months ago that i've already began blocking out #but the thing is that that person was someone i knew i'd never have to work with again #i mean at first i thought i would have to work with them more. then they announced they were moving away immediately #so i only had to deal with them face to face for another weekish after that point and anytime they yelled at me #i was like 'cool. i'll do exactly what you say to do. and nothing more.' but then of course me being me #i did some extra stuff and they initially were like 'oh that's pretty' and then days later told me to cut everything i added #and like sure i get that the show was frozen but girl. that costume was unfinished. i was trying to finish it. it was frozen but looked bad #anyway. whenever they yelled at me and had actual malice in their heart i was like whatever. i was hurt. but i didn't care as much. #but this time it's someone i've worked with many many times before and it was about a habit i have that i know isn't great #but at the same time the thing that prompted it wasn't even me doing this habit it was something else #but she interpreted it as that habit and said that i can't do that on a production she's directing #and that if i couldn't stop then i could pull out from the production and there'd be no hard feelings between us #and honestly i think her reassuring that she knows i'm valuable and that she wants me there while also telling me not to do this thing #and the fact that she's someone i like working with and will continue to work with just made it all hurt so much more #especially since she referenced another past production we've done where i didn't even realize she had noticed that i do this. #and i found myself in near tears. and still am kind of in near tears. i can't decide if i need to cry or not. #and i had NO sleep last night so i was looking forward to sleeping tonight but now i'm just overthinking EVERYTHING #and like. i know everything will be fine. if i just stop inserting myself and stick to just my specific tasks. it'll be fine. #but this is one of the ways my ocd manifests. i feel like i have to personally fix something i notice going wrong. or it'll be bad. #because every single time i choose to sit back and not be nosy when i notice something it ends up bad in a way i could have prevented #if i just inserted myself in a situation i technically wasn't part of but knew i could help or fix. so i just need to not do that. #but then i feel guilt if it does go wrong in the ways i immediately assumed it would and in a way i could prevent. #and i've been trying to work on this for like 6 months and aaaahhhh it's hard and being called out on it from her just really really hurt #i still may or may not cry. i don't know. the irony of me telling my therapist THIS MORNING that it's been a while since i last cried. #and the universe being like 'i took that as a challenge' and handing me this situation for me to spiral over. #i need to leave things alone. i need to stare straight ahead. and ignore whatever isn't specifically for me to do. but ahhh i want to help #and then of course my mom has this same habit and it annoys me when she does it yet i do it to other people and ahhhhhhhh #brain please just shut up. i need to sleep. i have to work tomorrow.

[byanyan]

what ghost haunts you?

the ghost of vengeance

ㅤyou ache for revenge and little else. red paints your vision, and it has grown so thick that it has grown so hard to see. somewhere within your ribs is a child longing for comfort again. you will never let them see the light of day. for now, there is blood on your hands and your teeth. before you were a human, you were an omen with a heart constructed of thorns. when audre lorde wrote, “i feel it’s my anger that helped keep me alive.” when ashe vernon wrote, “isn’t this rage so ugly? and isn’t it mine, still? good god, isn’t it mine?” you will never find peace within your own anger, but you bathe in it anyway. the way you always have.

tagged by:ㅤ@metrictita ty!! ♡♡

#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ dash meme. #ouggghhghghghghghhh #yeah. YEAH. very real. #that 'somewhere within your ribs is a child longing for comfort again' hits especially hard ngl #byan CRAVES revenge for everything that's ever happened & been done to them... #but just as much they crave everything they should have had yet were never given #thanks i'll be on the floor crying abt this for the rest of the night if anyone needs me

[p-andore]

it's crazy how i thought i escaped the usual teenage years depression phase, only for it to come back ten years later in my young adult era and kick my butt

#incredible isn't it #i've been spending my last few weeks crying #trying to understand how the hell did i end up this way #and why #realising i'll never get to know true love nor desire #because i have nothing worth loving or desiring #because i'm not pretty or beautiful i'm not interesting i'm not nice and i'm not easygoing #i'm not sensible i'm not soft i'm not feminine and i'm not agreeable #i have nothing good for myself and it took me years to get it #and it's all my fault #and i guess its a done deal by now i'll definitely stay alone my whole life #eris.txt