#it’s just a sense I get which is totally fine

[anemoiashifts]

mental health check-in for reality shifting.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

as we all know, reality shifting is generally neural thing but tends to be glorified & romanized by a select few due to people wanting to have a better situation or a more desirable life.

that in itself is totally fine but this post is created with the intent to make sure the community has a healthy relationship with shifting & if not possible solutions.

if mental health is left unchecked it can lead to destructive behaviors & can worsen preexisting mental health concerns. for me personally, that’s not what shifting is about. you can learn about yourself & grow without even shifting. the expansion of your perspective & becoming more empathetic to yourself is something i believe is extremely important.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ how often do you think about shifting ?

while it’s fun to daydream & think about your desired reality — does it consume your life or take away from other tasks that need to get done in this reality? if you’re somebody who has maladaptive daydreaming disorder (like myself!) it can exacerbate the fantasy-like aspect of thinking about shifting.

if you’re someone whose mind wanders a lot do something productive. this could be finishing some homework that you’ve been putting off for a long time or rearranging your bedroom. stuff like partaking in hobbies while listening to youtube videos in the background may help too.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ why are you shifting ?

is it because you’re searching for something bigger ? maybe you’re looking for friends ? while you probably aren’t going to be able to meet your favorite characters here, you can meet lots of other people & make new connections at anytime. if it’s in person or even if it’s in an online space , i bet there are lots of people in this comment section or any shifting video who would love to be your friend.

defining why you want to shift can do wonders for uncovering more about yourself. 90% of the things people want to shift for are & can be found here & you’re more then worthy of them. just because you want something like love or a sense of belonging doesn’t mean you have to travel the multiverse for it.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ “i want to k!ll myself because i can’t shift.”

while i understand frustration, extremes that result in life altering & ending choices are never good and quite frankly, frightening for a creator to see in their comment sections. most sv!c!des are committed on impulse. we go through so many emotions on the daily & process so much information a day. taking a moment alone to think & break down thought process & long term effects your actions will have is a nice way to come back down to earth.

meditation is also a great tool to calm down. you can even use shifting guided meditations without the actual intention to shift. breath work has also been helpful to me.

i understand these suggestions aren’t long term fixes but if you’re someone who has echoed these words & truly meant it then i cannot recommend therapy & possible taking a break from shifting even more to focus on yourself right here where you are. this may not be the answer you’d like to hear but it’s the one that is possibly needed.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ timing.

there is no specific time frame that you have to shift. both children & adults do hold the capability to shift. if someone tells you, you can’t shift because ___ or that you’ll age out of something its simply not true. things take time & it’s okay if your journey doesn’t look like everyone else’s. there’s no need to stress yourself out. try to enjoy the journey as well as being excited for the outcome. essentially, a large part of the shifting journey is meditation & affirmations which are both beneficial to your mental & physical self. try to sprinkle in some self love affirmations or general positive thoughts too. even if you need to take a step away from shifting & pick it up at a later date, i encourage you to do so if it’s stressing you out or you’re only focusing on shifting or neglecting your life / responsibilities here.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ shadow & trauma work.

answering questions that are meant to make you think & deeply reflect are tools that hi light some issues you may not even realize you’ve had. i have a tumblr post here with some, but for tiktok, ill list some on the next side. these ones are specifically for shifting but i encourage you to venture out to discover some more personal ones to expand upon your answers to these.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

i should also mention, i’m not a therapist so take what i say as non-professional advice & mere suggestions & a starting point to truly expand what shifting has done for you, negatively & positivity. im a huge advocate for therapy & if you feel comfortable enough expand upon these conversations in sessions if you feel comfortable.

i understand my audience is varied in age but i do notice a lot of you are younger then myself. it’s hurts to see people who are so young stress themselves out this much over trying to shift. i really do care about you & want to see all of you happy — with or without shifting.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

#reality shifting #desired reality #shifting #shiftblr #shiftok #shifting motivation #shifting realities #shifter

[ot3]

tangentially related to 30 rock... i just finished watching girls5eva because its the level of sitcom that's fine for me to watch while working and someone brouht it up in my inbox a week or so ago. but when i saw the tiny fey EP credit i was like ahhh okay that makes sense.

showrunner of girls5eva was meredith scardino who was a writer on kimmy schmidt, which also tracks. the 30 rock dna is really trickling down through those shows and i can't tell if its getting weaker as it goes or if its just that since this style of humor is no longer novel it doesnt hit as well

girls5eva was fine i watched the whole thing (i accidentally started on season 3 and did not realize until it was finished. i dont know why netflix decided to start this show at season 3 for me when i hadnt watched the previous ones?) and it definitely had some funny moments but i felt it just like it wasn't quite getting where it needed to humor-wise for me. like all of the ribbing about the horrible misogyny and shit that was just Everywhere in the 00s was fun but i think over all just nothing about it was fresh in a way it would have needed to be to make the show stand out

i never finished kimmy schmidt but i do remember it being pretty funny. havnet watched it since the first few seasons were originally airing, maybe ill go back and do that to compare. but theres also something to be said for how much shorter every show has to be now. girls5eva is 3 seasons with 22 episodes total (dont know if its getting a 4th but it's still listed as 2021- on everywhere), kimmy schmidt was 4 seasons with 51 episode. meanwhile 30 rock had 7 seasons and 139 ! episodes. that's a pretty fucking significant difference. so it may be that just having more leeway to throw spaghetti at the wall gives you the chance to be funnier.

im not exactly tapped in to the sitcom market but i feel like it's been probably around a decade since we've gotten a new one that's really managed to produce what i view as stand-out and novel humor. definitely the best one since 30 rock has been community, but i also do think brooklyn 99 managed to really nail a lot of good Bits even if the way it made people act was intolerable a lot of the time. captain holt you will always be famous. but other than those 2 i don't think anything really groundbreaking has been done in the US sitcom landscape since the aughts

im sorry abbott elementary stans its perfectly enjoyable television but it's just like Doing a Parks and Rec again which was in turn Doing An Office But Twee itself.

[iwritesickfic]

Where I Need to Be - part 2

it's been a while since I put out part 1, but here's the conclusion! hope you enjoy :)

While the day has been miserable, Theo’s pretty sure he’s over the hump of whatever illness he has. He hasn’t thrown up since this morning, and his fever’s been under control (mostly) since he’s been able to hold down ibuprofen and water. He’s still got a pounding headache, and his stomach is puffy and tender, but all in all, it’s not as bad as it could be. And he knows how bad it could be.

He’s been in and out of sleep the last few hours, and he’s woken up most recently to a hushed phone conversation happening on the other side of the bedroom door. He’s only getting bits and pieces-

“Kelly, I told you…sick, that’s why…fever…Ok fine…One hour…Ok. Bye.”

Then the door opens, and Seamus is walking in. His smile is strained, but it’s there.

“Hey, love. How are we?” he asks, same gentle voice as always. It’s so different than the one he was using on the phone just a moment ago.

“Not bad,” he says, and for once he's telling the truth. Seamus sits down the edge of the bed, laying his hand on Theo’s forehead.

“You still feel pretty cool. Not cool, but not…not too hot,” he says, and runs his thumb back and forth over his sweat slick skin. They sit in silence for a while before Seamus speaks again. “So. I’m going to ask you something but I need you to be really, really honest. Ok?”

Theo nods. This will have to do with the phone call. Kelly is the artist whose album he’s working on. And who deeply, deeply dislikes Theo. Needless to say, she was not pleased to find out Seamus was missing a day of work to be with Theo, fever of 104 or not.

“There’s a dinner tonight with some people from the label, and Kelly- they want me to go.” There’s an expression on his face that Theo can only describe as shame. It makes sense he’d feel that way, but Theo doesn’t hold it against him. Work is work, they both know that, and some part of Theo was waiting for this conversation to come. And he can't even fully focus because his head is throbbing.

“Ok,” he says, voice shaky. “What did you tell them?”

“I told them I’d have to see about it but it’d only be there for an hour, tops. So be honest, if I was gone for two hours, do you think you’d be ok? Do you feel like it’s getting worse?”

“How big of a deal is it? Contract, or?” He already knows it’s a very big deal or Seamus wouldn’t be asking, but his answer will pretty much depend on it.

“That’s not…” He bites his lip. “It’s not contracted, but if they don’t like what they see…” He trails off before shaking his head. “It’s ok either way. If I stay or go. Just be honest.”

Honestly, he doesn’t want Seamus to leave. Not at all. That said, he doesn’t feel sick enough to justify making him stay. If sleeps for the next few hours, which is likely, there’d be no point in making Seamus stay home.

“Go. I’ll be fine.” A wave of relief seems to wash over Seamus, though the look of guilt doesn’t totally leave.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I’ll be fine for a couple hours.”

“Ok. Two hours. Tops.”

He’s asleep before Seamus even walks out the door. But when he wakes up, he realizes that this virus is far from done with him.

His whole body is shaking, sweat pouring off him, his clothes plastered to his skin. His stomach is in knots, and when he opens his mouth to take a gasping breath he immediately heaves up a mouthful of bile. He’s so hot. He’s never been so hot in his life. His chest is tight with it, his breath is shallow.

He knows he needs to get to the bathroom, but the minute he pushes himself up with trembling arms, the world spins, and he vomits again. God, his stomach. He moans and forces himself out of bed, and quickly finds he’s way too weak and dizzy to stand. He nearly faints before catching himself on the bedframe. Somehow, he finds his way to the bathroom and falls hard to his knees before leaning over the toilet and heaving again.

The cold of the tile almost hurts his fevered skin. It feels raw, just like his throat. His chin is sticky with drying vomit, and he peels off his shirt. When his hand goes to touch his cramping middle he can't hold back the whimper that escapes. It's so tender - the touch feels like a stab. He also can feel that he’s very, very bloated. The normally concave expanse of his abs is jutting out from his hips, puffy and aching. The waistband of his shorts presses uncomfortably into the swell, and combined with the pressure of his touch, it makes him retch.

In between heaves he can’t hold his head up, so he slumps against the toilet bowl, forehead on the cold porcelain rim.

Sweat drips from the tip of his nose on the floor below him. His breath is gasping in and out, and he's not sure whether he's shaking with fever or sheer exertion.

“Seamus!” He calls as loudly as his voice will let him, which isn’t very loud at all. It's cracked and thin. In that moment he remembers Seamus isn’t here. The thought wrenches a sob from him.

God, he’s so pathetic. A quivering mess, crying for his boyfriend, vomit on his chin. There are a few minutes of respite where he just sits there trying to catch his breath, chest jumping up and down, praying for relief from the fever and the throbbing in his skull. Praying it’s almost… What time is it? What time did Seamus leave?

Before he can think much harder on it, he’s vomiting again. There's only bile now, nothing else is left in his stomach. But once the bile is gone, it doesn’t stop. It’s wringing him out. He’s dry heaving until he’s too weak to. He’s still dripping sweat. It burns his eyes, stings his chapped lips.

He needs to get his phone. He needs to call Seamus. It has to have been two hours by now - it feels like he’s been in this bathroom for 5. But it can’t have been, because Seamus would be back.

The bedroom. His phone is in the bedroom.

He’s no stranger to being this sick, but it doesn’t make it any easier.

He stumbles back down the hall, having to stop and lean against the wall every few steps when his lightheadedness is too much to handle.

He gets the phone. His hands are shaking so badly he almost drops it. He taps Seamus's perfect, smiling photo. Immediately, he hears his voicemail message - "Hey, it's Seamus. I don't really check my voicemail so just shoot me a text! Thanks." There's a dial tone, and Theo hangs up. He calls again. The phone is sticking to the side of his face. Same thing.

This is a nightmare. It has to be. He looks at the time. It's after 10, Seamus should've been home by 8.

Theo is slumped on the floor, back against the wall, just trying to breathe evenly enough to avoid throwing up any more than he already has. The last bout of vomiting had quelled the nausea slightly, but it's back, despite him still not having anything in his stomach to purge. His mouth is dry and sour but the thought of even rinsing it out makes his stomach churn.

He opens his texts. It takes a long time to type a message. It's riddled with typos but his hands are shaking too badly to do any better. It's something along the lines of "where are you? i need you". Normally he wouldn't be so direct, but he's desperate.

Then the world is spinning, spinning, spinning. And then he’s asleep.

Every extra minute Seamus is sitting at this table he's nervous. But, he reminds himself for the thousandth time, Theo would've called if something was wrong. He's probably asleep. His phone has been silent all night, tucked in the pocket of his coat where it hangs from the back of his chair. He's glanced at it a few times, but nothing's come through.

Still, he promised Theo two hours. It's been four. And even if he leaves now, it'll be four and a half.

He's glad he came though. As much as it would've gone just fine without him, he has way more experience dealing with execs than Kelly does. Zeke even flew in from New York. The meeting started at a restaurant in the city and migrated to some random pub a few doors down after the execs were on their way.

At about 11 he goes to the bathroom and grabs his phone as an afterthought. There are absolutely no notifications, which seems strange.

Upon closer examination, he sees it's set to "do not disturb." He definitely did not set it to "do not disturb." He stops in the doorway of the bathroom as he sees the notifications flood in. 6 missed calls. Five unread texts. All from Theo. He has to stop himself from sprinting back to get his coat. He's immediately in panic mode.

Kelly, Zeke and a few other acquaintances from the label look up from their conversation.

"Whoa, what's up?" Zeke asks as Seamus throws on his coat with shaking hands.

"I just - It's an emergency," he manages to say. Zeke furrows his eyebrows but doesn't protest. Kelly huffs.

"Seamus, please. He can take care of himself," she says, and he freezes in place. Zeke looks very confused now.

"Theo?" Zeke interjects, but Seamus doesn't bother responding.

"I told him I'd be home at 8 and it's 11 and he's been trying to call me since 10. I don't know why my phone…" He trails off. He can barely think straight. Kelly crosses her arms and looks at Zeke, whose lips are pressed into a line. "What?"

"Well, we agreed it'd be best if there weren't any distractions," Kelly says. Seamus isn't someone who ever really gets angry, per se, but he's angry right now. Furious. But everyone is staring at him now, and it'll only look unprofessional if he loses his shit. He turns his gaze to Zeke, who looks extremely guilty.

"I didn't know something was wrong, I-" He starts and Seamus clenches his jaw. He starts to stammer out a reply before realizing that every minute he spends here is one minute he's wasting.

"I'll see you guys Monday," he says, trying to keep his voice as even as possible, ignoring the shouts of his name as he leaves.

He tries to call Theo. It rings, but there's no answer. He calls again. Still nothing. He's going about 20 over the speed limit, his knuckles white on the steering wheel. When he walks into the house he doesn't even bother taking off his coat or shoes.

"Theo?" He calls. No answer. He knows logically that Theo's not dead, but the panic in his chest does not seem to know that.

He stops in the doorway of the bedroom. Theo's on the floor, half curled up, shaking like a leaf. Seamus is frozen for a moment before he rushes to him.

Theo's skin is hot - so ungodly fucking hot - and so incredibly pale. Seamus shakes his shoulder lightly, and though Theo moans softly, he doesn't open his eyes.

"Teddy?" Seamus asks, running his hand up and down Theo's arm. Theo's eyelids flutter, and another small sound of pain escapes his chapped lips. Seamus taps his cheek gently. "Teddy, baby."

Theo's eyes finally open, only halfway but enough for Seamus to know he's conscious. When his gaze lands on Seamus's face he lets out a sobbing breath.

"Shh, you're ok," Seamus murmurs, trying to keep his voice steady. He lifts Theo so he's sitting upright, almost all his weight on Seamus. His forehead rests on Seamus's shoulder, his breathing shallow and labored through sobs. He smells like vomit and sweat, and his hands are immediately clinging to Seamus's shirt. "I’m gonna lift you up, alright?"

Theo doesn't reply, but Seamus wasn't necessarily asking for permission.

He maneuvers Theo's limp body so he can pick him up, and tries to ignore the spike of panic when all of his body is pressed against him. He's on fire, trembling, letting out little whimpers of pain at every movement. Theo doesn’t cry like this. Ever. And it’s making Seamus very nervous.

He's glad he works out enough to squat 250, because Theo is only a little over half that. He doesn't bother trying to get his shorts off before placing him in the bathtub, his long legs bent in the small space. Seamus turns on the water and rummages to find the thermometer.

Theo doesn't even make a sound as the cold water hits his skin, and doesn't even seem to notice when Seamus slips the thermometer under his tongue. As the water rises and he waits for the thermometer to do its job, the guilt really starts to set in.

He should've been here. Instead, he was out at a bar, drinking and laughing and assuming everything was fine. He should have noticed his phone was fucked up, he should've left when he said he would. He doesn't know how bad the fever is exactly, but he would wager a guess that it's really fucking bad. Odds are all the vomiting made him dehydrated, which made his fever worse, which made the nausea worse, and around and around until they got here.

He takes one of Theo's limp hands, and with the other, calls Zeke. It's only a ring or two before he picks up.

"What's up?" He asks, and Seamus suddenly feels like he might cry.

"I think I need to take him to A&E." His voice is shaking.

"The-" He cuts Zeke off before he can finish.

"The ER."

"Ok, ok. Uh…" Zeke trails off, clearly flustered. The background noise of the bar softens and a door closes. Seamus cuts in again.

"Do we have anyone here who could come give an IV?" In New York, Theo has people who'll come to wherever he is and give him the basics without having to go to the actual hospital, but Seamus has no idea what's at their disposal in Ireland. He kicks himself for not thinking to find out before now.

"Uh, I can check. I'll call around. Maybe. Is he-"

"I might be able to get it- get the fever down, but he's really dehydrated, so…" Seamus trails off. "You have people here, right?"

"I mean, yeah. In theory. It's just-"

"Just find out what's faster. I can drive him to A&- the ER, or someone can come here. Either way, just find out what's quicker, ok?"

"Ok. I'll call you back in a few, just hang tight." He doesn't hang up just yet. "And I'm sorry, I never would've let Kelly have your phone if I knew what was going on."

"Well she shouldn't have my phone anyway."

"Right."

"Yeah. Just call me back when you know, ok?"

"Ok, hang tight."

The line goes dead and Seamus checks his watch before taking the thermometer out of Theo's mouth. 40.5. He stares at the reading for longer than he needs to, feeling the panic in his chest spike.

Theo’s eyelids are fluttering now, and the hand Seamus is holding tightens around his.

“Oh my God…” Theo breathes out, his voice ragged and thin. “Fuck.”

“You’re ok, you’re ok,” Seamus says, and dips his hand in the cool water before laying it on Theo’s forehead. A towel or washcloth would work better, but he can’t make himself move from this spot.

“Shay, I…” he murmurs, before trailing off, “I had the worst nightmare.”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got you,” he says back gently, wiping Theo’s chin. It’s taking so much effort to maintain this facade of calm, but he knows if he starts to freak out, it’ll only make things worse.

“I…In my dream…I kept calling you and calling you,” he mumbles, and Seamus is immediately sick to his stomach with guilt. “But you wouldn’t answer. And I was alone.”

It takes everything in him to speak around the lump in his throat.

"I'm here now," is all he manages to choke out. He can't bring himself to lie outright. He'll need to come clean eventually, but not now when Theo's still half delirious. "You've had your appendix out, right?"

Theo nods.

"Burst. In college.” Despite the cold water, Theo doesn't seem to be getting any cooler. He's not even shivering.

He's gathering Theo's hair into a little bun when Zeke calls him back.

“What did they say?” He asks, and Zeke sighs.

“They have people in Dublin, but they wouldn't be able to make it to you until tomorrow morning. I could call you a car but I think it'd just be faster for you to drive him in. If you feel like that's what he needs.”

It's a horrible drive. Then a horrible night.

When they drive home the next morning, Theo's still running a fever, but it's not as bad as it was. The insides of his arms and the backs of his hands are bruised - he was so dehydrated they had to jab him about ten times to find a vein for the IV.

He's able to walk inside from the car, which is a major improvement, but he collapses on the couch as soon as he walks in.

“I'm gonna make some tea, alright?” Seamus asks, carefully stroking some of his hair back from his face. Theo just nods, closing his eyes.

As he makes the tea, he knows he needs to tell him. Not today. No, he’ll wait, he thinks, and tries to convince himself it's for Theo’s benefit. He doesn't quite manage.

#my writing #whump #sickfic #illness kink #oc theo #oc seamus #fever #emeto

[siflshonen]

https://twitter.com/arthurianmaiden/status/1629170457608876039

Have u watched the cooking extra with the live actors ? 🥺 cue katsuki cuteness time...

I love (and cringe at) the played-up-even-more-with-real-people-beyond-what-the-cartoon-ever-did-overtly-without-other-prompting nature of Katsuki’s fixation on Izuku and I LOVE how he is SO upset at Ochako’s observations and input.

Way of the Househusband Kacchan-Tacchan AU…

And most of all I love the “I’m gonna try to be a punk about even this!” big-eyed “you can eat it” he gives Ochako as he slinks off to lick his wounds and think about how he made a fool of himself about this. This actor is really doing his best cartoon shitty punk for Katsuki and it’s incredible! It’s the kind of cringe that warms my heart. He’s truly giving it his all, and of course Ochako is a delight, too!

#BNHA #bnha ultra stage #ultra stage #Bakugo katsuki #Uraraka Ochako #I wanna watch the full shows but am also afraid #I love camp but these are SO intentionally camp that it makes me embarrassed #like the goal is to be as cheesy and adorable as possible #but sometimes it’s too much! #yes! it’s faithful to the show and stuff and that is charming #but with real people sometimes that can be a bit too much you know? #I suppose it’s because I feel like the anime and this stage adaptation care not for subtext #it’s just a sense I get which is totally fine #still has fun and cute characters and antics #but without it a lot of my favorite things and favorite characters are not quite the same #yanno???

[sydmarch]

anyway this is what i was actually trying to find. fucking thinking about this.

#NEED to know about their young adulthood. acele is described as 'late teens to early twenties' & we have no fucking clue how old evrart #is beyond 'around the same age as harry' which could mean anything when klaasje thinks hes 44 & kim thinks hes 56 #but i imagine they ARE actuslly very close in age bcus it'd just make sense wrt the timing of the revolution & all & yknow the parallels #so like they definitely could have been somewhere in their mid or late 20s when they came into power? & this 'at her age' as just a handful #of years before that? (choosing to just believe this line rather than taking it as him only trying to 'kids will be kids'ing away the drug #lab thing & making something up. so i can totally just like imagine lots of anger. at the state of things. about powerlessness. what do we #DO about it? probably getting into trouble & getting in fights for a long time. like leo says they ALWAYS came to help it wasn't just a one #off thing where they defended him it was just that one incident where the bullying stopped. bcus they beat him until he NEEDED STITCHES #like god i can just imagine their childhood & then the adolescent & young adult frustration & all of that coalescing into ok we WILL do #something to make things better. whatever it takes even. coming to the decision it's worth killing for #'your honor it's fine that my little meow meow had someone assassinated he had a bad childhood you see' #im chewing through concrete im throwing up im pacing my enclosure #anyway. me when i'm normal about the video game men #texticles #de #disco elysium #evrart

[butmemostly]

there is not enough 92sies sprace. i know what you all are doing. 92sies fans did not get on their knees and pick up crumbs to ship spot and race for the rest of us to run off with it and apply it to livesies where not only do they not even directly interact, but fanon prefers because they find the actors more attractive, and then proceed to boil their characters down to 1-2 traits each and ship them in a weird almost f/tishy "dumb feminine man x angry masculine man" way. guys this is a class war not the yaoi war.

#& dont get me wrong NOT all sprace content is like this. it's just Enough #i know this is gonna be controversial but as much as i love sprace ive finally realized why a lot of the fan content doesnt appeal to me #or is just straight up uncomfortable #and it kind of goes with the sexification of funny characters in general which race has fallen victim to #in which ppl remove their depth; give them more sex appeal; and add a pinch of frat boy to the mixture #to make this unhinged sexful comic relief #now im just as in love with btc as the rest of yall but race fell victim to this because he was in the proshot and ppl were attracted 2 him #which is fine #BUT leads to a lot of like. #misinterpretation of his character or just heavily exaggerating certain aspects that made him initially attractive to ppl #which then ends up consuming fanon like a poisoned water supply #it's kinda a variation of sexymanification. fanon making a character stereotypically queer but in a way that is attractive and consumable #and completely overtakes canon aspects of the character. it is not inherently f*tishy but it can definitely acquire those vibes #source: kuroo tetsurou warrior who survived 2016 era haikyuu fandom #92sies sprace is a funny rarepair while livesies sprace is like when the bbc sherlock fandom shipped lestrade and mycroft for no reason #but with the vibes of the ppl who Made Up A Man to ship moriarty with. does that make sense. #the never-interacted rarepair mixed with the yaoiful (derogatory) vibes of 'if this man has no one to ship with i'll just make one myself' #and again i dont think all (livesies) sprace content falls victim to this nor do all people Intend to characterize them this way #i can totally get Not realizing you're portraying them this way until someone points it out #and i couldnt even articulate why i didn't like a lot of sprace content until i saw some passing mentions of this like. An Hour ago #newsies #sprace #dontlistento me

[scrawlingskribbles]

still endlessly fascinating to me that the whole "Casanova"/"romance" angle of Raymond's character is just a word-of-god informed trait that we never actually.... see, in-show?? Like, if you're Just watching the episodes without any other contact to fandom/Krew stuff, Raymond is purely just a haughty sports-themed bot with a bit of a flair for the dramatic, so Ernesto's jab at him in Let's Watch The Boxmore Show about needing to "pick a lane" between Sports or Romance feels like it comes?? completely out of left field????? 😂😂 (yes, sports pun intended lol) Like... is it just because of his whole roses/flowers motif??? Is that really all it takes to somehow constitute "romance" here?? Because I call BS on that honestly xD 'Romance' as a concept has way more depth/complication than simply "the existence of roses/flowers"; not to make another pun so soon, but It Takes Two To Tango as the saying goes, and the only person Raymond ever (sort-of?) tangoed with was Rad but that dance battle was definitely Not romantic-coded, so?? xD (Insert joke here about Second First Date largely consisting of a date-fight with a focus on flowers which Was supposed to be romantic-coded but SHHH x'3c) But at the same time, if the flowers aren't supposed to be the reasoning then W H E R E are we supposed to have seen any kind of ""romance"" from Raymond for Ernesto's line to make sense??? Please, I am genuinely asking to be shown the logical thread here, it's been killing me for years now and I simply Cannot see it jhgjshgkjsg x''3

#OK KO #baffled. absolutely *gobsmacked*. like I know it's a kids cartoon and he's nowhere near a Main/focus character #but you can't go making claims of Casanova and Romance-Bot and then NEVER actually show that at all??? #I mean my Actual theory for why they refer to him like that is that it's like. a workaround/codeword for The GayTM #which then makes Ernesto calling him out for it even more rude & tbh kinda hilarious but I digress xD #''oh no he's totally flamboyant & dramatic & XYZ because he's a ~RoMaNcE~ robot; don't worry Censors there's nothing to see here <3'' #and yeah again this is Specifically about Ernesto calling him out for something that we Never saw on-screen in-show #so like if there were other PlansTM or whatever that didn't make it in then fine I get that but then you need to cut Ernesto's line too #because otherwise it just doesn't make sense 😂 #OKAY I'm done with this ramble for now; my apologies for taking up your dash/screen space with this nonsense x3c #shut up Wisp

[reconnecting]

rambling dont mind me

#thinking about how the difference between me n my other indigenous friends is like a border or two #thats it #and how that really just can totally remove everything i have to say from relevancy with other indigenous people #like my yukayeke vs my cousins tribe n clan #function completely differently #which makes sense like we're ages apart #literally different countries and opposite sides even if we werent #but i think like #as soon as you get south of the border the 'rules' that northern dudes have made kinda stop applying how you think they do #like my cousin is metis and taino because theyre my cousin #or more theyd be a part of my yukayeke if theyd learn about it i guess is more accurate like #its a bit more complex than how im saying it but yk #but i cant be part of their clan or tribe #which mind you is FINE like its not a bother or anything like that and i dont necessarily even know if id join given the choice #but i find it really interesting like #something about the timezone of when you got colonized and where that border is really changed us #i dont think we need to be this divided in our views is kinda the other thing but also i think that we currently need how certain things ar #like how theyre different #just in order to deal with the surrounding population of people #like shit my boyfriend's family would NEVER admit theyre indigenous even though he wants to reconnect #whereas white cherokee grandma is a whole thing here #well excluding the aztecs but his family considers them dead so im not counting that rn #versus like my taino ass #we're having a whole resurgence of people trying to be proud of their blood in puerto rico #its a HUGE thing to say 'oh fuck we're not dead' like its a MAJOR event thats been happening for the past few years #and its great! its like actually fantastic! #and i really GENUINELY hope it doesnt end up with our yukayekes becoming even more closed off #i hope it ends with 'youre taino? come learn then.' and then we learn #because fuck if i dont love my people but fuck if im not sick of people claiming shit for fun too #idk

[buysomecheese]

Preventing myself from freaking tf out by remembering that even my hormones don’t want to be in my body even my body is trying to prove that it’s Wrong and it’s funny that everything agrees with me except my mom and the government

#boyfriend I’m ok I promise lol #context for my dear friends here on Tumblr I got diagnosed (?) with a complex ovarian cyst today #it hurts and I’m upset about it because it’s Just Another Reminder that this body is female!!! #I used to say ‘yea it may not be the body I’m supposed to have but at least it works just fine’ #no I have chronic issues with synthesizing hormones or something #like this body knows the hormones and shit are wrong and keeps rejecting it but that doesn’t Help any #and being on testosterone will actually probably be very helpful to my literal health y’know #because otherwise I’d have to be on bc my whole life to prevent unnecessary pain and shit #and I’ve already lived that it caused Other issues lmao (irregular menstruation even when on the pill blood clot risk No period for >6- #-months sometimes etc.) so testosterone will. be very healthy for me to be on once I get there. #but before I start now I have to figure out so many Things and my hormone levels will have to be So totally tested #which was gonna be needed anyways it’s just gonna be annoying #and I would be so ok with just having a hysterectomy (partial or complete) and taking gahrt being done with it #but NO no of course not. never would it be that easy. my MOM- #it’s fine like of course she doesn’t want her 18 year old unmarried childless daughter to have a hysterectomy that makes sense #doctors would agree with her and they’d be Not Incorrect #but I don’t want or need bio kids I’ll end up getting a hysterectomy anyways #but I had to explain Every Little Bit of the surgeries used for ovarian cysts they’re all so easy (like laproscopies and such) #it’s just tedious that she doesn’t know how to do research so it’s All on me to explain it but she also thinks I’m an idiot #like girl pick a struggle #either listen to me or don’t make me do your research #I’m gonna explode I’m fine. I’m gonna take a shower and then write an essay and apply to beta-reading jobs and go to sleep #speaking of. if anyone knows anyone who’s hiring beta-readers uhh give them my tumblr let them Hime #*hmu #I would love to be paid extra for reading and commenting on books lmao #especially if I’m gonna be paying my own hrt without my insurance (which is paid by my mom) then. well. #my $12.50 an hour for 8-12 hours a week job isn’t gonna cut it

[nomaishuttle]

mad abt the taz graphic novels again. sighhhhhh

#literally if taako wasnt grreen thats like soo many of the problems i have with it gone. granted i havent read them in ages #it is wild to me that theyre knly up to eleventh hour #bc i feel like the first 3 of them came out like one after the other bc i had all 3 of the first ones #and then just like..kdk what theyve been doing for 4 yeaes #sigh. i think the graphic novels r a rly fun idea i love the idea of seeing taz in a visual medium and ikk no design would satisfy #everyone. bc its a podcast we all picture them differently #but like cmon. i feel like everybody on earth hates green taako itd be so easy to just not do that. at least #i will say i do like merle and magnus #designs in the gns grabted i havent looked at them in a while but i remember thinking they were fine. lucretia was fine like literally #most of them were fine if like. very... idk they just felt like the most safe versions of the designs which makes sense #its the same as like #how everybody in the tma fandom pretty much drew jon and msrtin the same way. yk. #like thats how i feel abr the gn designs which like i totally get. yk... but also -_- whatever #idk. basiclaly

[aeide-thea]

still picking my way thru s3 of the witcher episode by agonizing episode but it's going SO slowly bc every time i watch one it's just like. right. this show is a B movie now and not in a good way

#like it's not like NONE of it has been fun but it's just like. i enjoy the fandom but the source material is. not actually good #and people SO badly want to credit it with all this depth and sophistication it just absolutely does not have #but s1 was at least like. coherent and fun if unsubtle #s2 and s3 have just been this big spiral into like. an attempt at Fantasy Saga #which would be fine if they were good enough at storytelling to do that coherently #but unfortunately it's just like. disconnected scene after disconnected scene strung together by mediocre action and worse humor #all of which have looked weirdly pastede-on-yay in a way i don't know enough formal film language to articulate #but it's just like. it doesn't feel like the characters are actually moving through the world‚ visually #it's just costumed ppl shoehorned into backgrounds that are either (1) cartoonishly stagey (2) dreary irl countryside somewhere (3) bad CGI #and then geralt gets whumped and it's like. wait NOW you want us to care abt him? after sidelining him all season? #like. idk. structurally and emotionally the writing just sucks #and then the acting and visuals are. largely also bad. lol. #jaskier is probably one of the best bits really but then they give him so much material that's absolutely clownish #and it's like. i'm not opposed to humor but it's remarkable the way the juxtaposition of his tone with the overall tone of the show #manages to make BOTH vibes seem stupid somehow. honestly an achievement #however. big fan of predicted-by-me-but-still-good betrayal scene. like. he didn't even seem surprised which was perf honestly #'obviously you lived down to my expectations‚ that's just how life goes and has gone ever since geralt blew up at me on that mountain' #just like. makes total sense and also grants him some actual depth and dignity #now do that the whole time with all the characters challenge… #tvblogging #(i realize no1 currs but like. i do like 2 record my Thots On Media otherwise they all fall out of my head like a sieve)

[sochilll]

Sometimes being an English major is the biggest burden because I read movie reviews and people say “this story sucks because x y z doesn’t make sense” when those things were exPLAINED IN THE BOOK THEY DIDNT HAVE TIME IN THE MOVIE BUT ITS IN THE BOOK READ THE BOOK

#i just finished never let me go and now I’m watching it #spoilers coming in the tags #and I will say there are some pretty big changes I didn’t particularly care for #but SO many reviews were like ‘why didn’t they run away’ like and do what??? Get jobs? they can’t they r literally clones bred for organs #The entire society is built on this where would they go #and people getting mad when someone pointed out that Ishiguro said that wasn’t the story he wanted to tell because it ‘makes more sense’ #like yeah maybe it’s expected some people would try to run away but most of them don’t. this story is about the ones that don’t. #Also people saying ‘so no one questions raising people just to kill them ://‘ #which is ALSO addressed in the book #that by the time moral conversations started people were more worried about their loved ones potential illnesses than clone children #There’s a really great line about like once you cure cancer you can’t just go back to a world where it’s incurable again #Plus a lot of people didn’t believe they were real people/had souls that was the whole POINT OF HAILSHAM #like why are you reading/watching dystopians and going ‘ya but that’s not how society is why don’t they just stop?’ #same energy as people who complain that everyone bursts into song in musicals #Anyway the movie was fine. i know when books span several years like that you have to cut it down for the movie #but it was very …. idk… the relationships were different #Ruth got totally nerfed as a character #everything happened too fast #:/ #🦝

[bmpmp3]

a lot of anime opening single b-sides get kinda overlooked but Everyone Should Listen to the b-side of fabiniku’s opening Refrain this song has been consuming my mind for the past 48 hours LIKE listen to it

the weirdass white noise/ darth vader breathing noise in the beginning and the quiet parts, the jazzy drums in the verses, guitar riffs that will make any dad who listens to too much classic rock air guitar his heart out, the vocals at around the 3:20 mark, the fantastical synth melody, THE FLUTE ASS SOUND are you listening to me are you listening to the FLUTE? the WOODWIND INSTRUMENT in the ‘refrain... refrain... refrain...” sections and the DISTORTION on the “refrain“s in the final seconds LISTEN TO ME listen to the woodwind instrument

#i havent actually watched this show (i've seen a couple clips tho!) but 1) im a big fan of anison in general like #there's a bajillion anime ops and eds i straight up know NOTHING about but i just like the tune or maybe a seiyuu i like sings it lol #and 2) i HAVE read the manga (its fantastic) and i do this like weirdass thing #or maybe its not weird? it might be normal. getting me to watch a television show is an exercise in futility #so whenever im interested in an anime i just read the manga or light novel if there is one #and then i just... look up the music for the anime later JKFKDSLJFLKDS i like tunes!!! #in practice i usually get a similar or somethings even better experience than the anime watchers #but sometimes some animes source material is like REALLY BAD and the anime basically toned down everything that sucked #so a totally different experience in some cases..................... BUT luckily it seems fabiniku is not one of those #i thought the manga was great at least. i get it now. i understand isekais #i always understood modern isekais in theory but in practice i couldnt quite get there #i was too stuck in proto isekais like old shoujo manga isekais or early mmo isekais so this new reborn in another world style #confused me a lot. i figure it was just wish fulfillment that wasnt for me. but fabiniku... i understand now #who knew the way to get me to fully deeply and completely understand isekais was to make the main character lgbt (every letter at once) #actually that makes sense like i love characters that have clear defined identities a lot BUT #i dont connect deeply with them the same way i do with characters like tachibana hfkjdsdfjkds which is fine!! its good to have both #types of characters because some people connect more with defined labels and some connect more with ambiguity (me lol) #and both are always interesting to read about either way~ #anyway. fabiniku is absurd and hilarious and has one of my favourite romantic relationships ive seen in a manga ever thank you and goodnight

[backslashdelta]

Sometimes I come across someone I have never heard of who has me blocked and I always wonder. What was it? What post of mine did you see that made you think, "nope she's got to go"?

#to be clear I don't have a problem with this #if someone would prefer not to see me as part of their tumblr experience I absolutely accept respect and am okay with that #but also I am soooooo curious I cant help it SORRY #usually I can make a pretty good guess just based on their blog #but sometimes I just have no idea #which. again. totally fine nobody needs to justify that to me anyway!! they can block me just because they dont like purple if they want #and then sometimes I get unblocked and think: what changed? 👀 #although that doesnt happen too often tbh which. fair enough makes sense. #anyway it just makes me wonder is all #mine #personal

[violetclarity]

becoming increasingly concerned/convinced that I’m destined (doomed?) to be (romantically) alone, not out of any particular desire to but because dating requires so much energy, and how does one do it safely in the era of covid and now mpv, and the world is on fire so shouldn’t I be focusing my energy on other things? but also the world being on fire makes me even more scared about facing it alone. I just want someone (or someones, I would be happy w a platonic community too) who I know will be there with me when things get hard, to put down roots and make plans with even though the future is so uncertain.

like logically I know that I’m not too old to find love and/or a partnership, I’m not saying this in a “well I’ve reached age X so no one will want me” way, honestly I think I’m a catch and I bring a lot to the table! but given the state of the world, the pandemic, where most of my friends are at in their lives, it does feel like I’ve either missed the boat, or am about to miss the boat when it comes to finding a serious relationship/life partner. but how does that urgency translate into action when I’ve only just got a handle on dating during covid and now there’s another virus to worry about? and trying not to burn out while still nurturing my friendships and many other activities? it’s not like I want to be alone, I want a community but don’t know how to find the people for whom that is also a priority, and then it all goes back to the question of meeting new people and nurturing relationships - how do I go out and make platonic connections that I can trust enough to face these scary times with either? how do I balance a desire for a romantic partnership with valuing my friendships as well? how do I live in a way that demonstrates my value of community, when circumstances have forced me to be so solitary?

#covid cw #mpv cw #monkeypox cw #personal #ranting about my love life (or lack thereof) #I know this is small potatoes in the grand scheme of things but /also/ #really starting to feel like I've missed out on whatever window I had to shack up with someone #like dating during covid last summer/fall was one thing #felt like I had figured out what I was comfortable w and how to do it safely #but omicron is so much more contagious and even though I just had it I don't want to get it again #plus now there's mpv to worry about as well #most people I know are partnering or partnered up and therefore prioritize their romantic relationships #which cool fine makes sense but where does that leave single people like me? #hard to make long-term plans when the future is super scary AND you don't have anyone to coordinate with #not to mention dating in general just exhausts me like #where are my fellow monogamous not-party people?? #idk if I'm just on the wrong apps but seems like everyone is very into drugs/going out or polyamorous #which is totally fine obviously but that's not what I'm looking for #and trying to find a place where lesbians congregate irl? HAH good luck #venting over I'm going to get back to cleaning my apartment now

[allpromarlo]

ok i'll break the ice and say i don't understand the point behind the mandalorian s2. they spend the whole 8 episodes trying to get grogu to a jedi that can train him, in the end they do, and the whole emotional ordeal rests on the fact that mando & grogu are separated now.

eight minutes later they reunite in tbobf and we're back to the start again.

wtf was the point of all that if they were gonna have a reunion before s3 anyways? like we ain't have to go thru all of that if that was how it was gonna end altogether lmao

#i just think that having them separate for two days in total before going 'suprise! they're together again' makes no sense #at least not in the context of dedicating a whole season to parting them and then reuniting them that soon ON A DIFFERENT SHOW #which conveniently takes place before s3 so there was basically no development in mando & grogu's story #like we coulda just skipped the whole 2nd season and be fine with it. cuz it doesn't amount to anything #other than 'remember this character you used to love as a child? please clap' #but ngl they got me with that too because i was up in my damn seat when i saw ahsoka i'm sawry #anyways #it would've been great to see how mando deals with being alone again and the whole thing with the mandalorian creed rules and whtv #for at least half a season namean #but nah. they had to put that annoying ass green rat back in there #they couldn't have left him out for ONE SEASON #smh #star wars #the mandalorian #the mandalorian s3 #just a thot. a lil thunk #on this beautiful thursday afterno- how the fuck is it thursday again. #this has probably been said before by some people but it just crossed my mind and i gotta get it out there #don't start an argument in my notes for the love of GAWD