#its an important part of the experience.

[jennyfromthebes]

the minute and a half of silence at the end of absolute lithops effect is a vital part of the song and no I'm not joking

#you ARE going to listen to this song thats about healing and then you are going to sit there in silence for half as long again. #its an important part of the experience. #every time i listen to my ahwt vinyl i get sad about it not having the long silence at the end #like. cmon dude thats important to me personally. didnt you know i wanted that #txt #orig #tmg #the mountain goats #all hail west texas

[swordsonnet]

lately, i've seen more people in the online autistic community acknowledging the struggles of people with higher support needs, which is of course an important development. but for some, that seems to come with the implicit assumption that low needs autistics "have it easy" or experience no stigma at all, which is just wrong??? people with low support needs are still disabled by their autism and still face discrimination because of it. sure, they are impaired to a lesser degree than those with higher support needs, but that doesn't mean you can just erase their struggles, y'know?

#sometimes i see posts that are like 'its unfair to say that autistic people have it easy and arent really disabled...' and go yes! exactly! #but then they'll continue like '...because not all autistic people have low support needs' #and i'm like. okay nevermind you dont understand this at all #i have comparatively mild autism (was diagnosed with aspergers back when that was still a thing) #and my autism has still significantly impacted and impaired my life #i think its important to acknowledge the huge range of experiences in the autistic community #and that many others have struggled much more than me #but that doesnt mean its all easy breezy for me and other lsn autistics yknow? #(i guess i would technically be considered medium support needs or something but that's because of my chronic illness not my autism) #i wish people would just. like. listen to other peoples experiences before just assuming that they know everything about their lives #ofc a huge part of this is also some lsn autistics distancing themselves from hsn people and pretending that they're not actually disabled #but not every lsn autistic is like that. and even the ones that are are usually (consciously or unconsciously) downplaying their symptoms #autism #actually autistic #actuallyautistic #this isn't really about the post i just reblogged btw it just reminded me of it #because some of the notes on it went in that direction

[trainingdummyrabbit]

maybe we'll try again next time.

#pikart #projmoon #(LONG TAGS..) i talk a lot about that latter part of poems of a machine but the first chorus never fails to break my heart too #i can never remember what ive talked about and what i havent so ill do it again anyway. #specifically the line 'so here i lie; reading you my poetic stupid rhymes.' especially in conjunction with the very first lyric. #all this built up... mess and madness; concepts of impossible scope and importance for just a few words. #its the desire to express a truth outside of your reach. to tentatively try to identify; to speak; and only managing so much. #clumsy; basic; small; but it still holds a piece of your heart anyway. its not enough; but its real; its tangible; and thus important. #am i making sense? its the first steps into writing poetry / into self expression / into self acceptance / into healing and growing. #and the implication these words are being shared; despite all of this; despite all of Her. augh. #i really do think a lot about th stark difference btwn her Knowledge and her Experience. how she feels she Should function vs how she Does. #knowing how something should be vs how it Is. yknow. #anyway Oops ! Lyric Rambling In The Tags Again ! <33

[commsroom]

i think there's something to be said about what exactly it means to be "non-human" in a story that is as much about humanity as wolf 359 is, where even the dear listeners are defined less by their own perspective and more by what they fail to understand and therefore reflect about the human perspective - to the point that they don't even have their own voices or faces or identities that aren't either given to them or taken from humans. they speak to humanity as a mirror.

even pryce and cutter are "very much humans" - pryce defined by her resentment of and desire to transcend its limitations, and cutter by his aspirations to redefine and create a "better" type of human - and find the idea that they might not be human laughable. it's interesting that they have distinctly transhumanist aspirations when their goal is the narrative opposite of common science fiction fears: that we will expand the definition of humanity so much that we'll lose whatever it is that makes us human. pryce and cutter's transhumanism narrows the definition of humanity to the worthy and the useful, as defined by them; "there will still be a humanity; it'll just be our humanity."

in direct opposition to that, i think it's meaningful that the show instead expands the definition of humanity in ways that include lovelace and hera, who in another show with different themes might be considered (in the descriptive, non-moralistic sense) non-human. i will always make a point of saying that personhood and humanity are two often-related but meaningfully distinct concepts, especially when talking about sci-fi and fantasy. i am talking about humanity.

the question of how hera identifies, and what social pressures influence that, is a complicated one. i've talked about it before and i will talk about again. what's important for the purposes of this post is that i think the show considers her fundamentally human. think about her role in shut up and listen - consider jacobi's lion example and the concept of different paradigms - that even things that are close to humans, comparatively speaking, understand the world in different ways. whatever differences hera may have from the others, it's primarily in experience, not fundamental understanding. she shares their emotions, their concerns, their values, their thought patterns. she has an appreciation for music, which the show considers a hallmark of humanity. she fits within the framework of humanity as the show defines and is, in her own words, left feeling "uneasy" about how difficult it might be to communicate with beings who don't. and it's significant that this takes place in shut up and listen, of all episodes, specifically because the way she is clearly and unambiguously included in the show's understanding of what it means to be human highlights the ways she and lovelace are othered by eiffel's careless comments that suggest otherwise.

(i don't want to get too into these details for this particular post, but it's worth noting that hera will refer to 'humans' as a category, often when she is upset and feeling isolated, but has never said that she 'isn't human' - she has never been upset that people are treating her 'too' human. i've seen it said about the line "you need to get it through your heads that what goes for you doesn't always go for me", but that's a frustration related to ability and safety, not identity. far more often, she will refer to herself in 'human' terms - referring idiomatically to experiences or body parts etc. that she doesn't literally have - and is upset primarily with comments referring to her status as an AI. it does not diminish how being an AI influences her perspective and experience, but again, so much of that is in terms of ability that it feels almost inseparable from a discussion about disability.)

lovelace's humanity and hera's humanity are so interlinked and directly paralleled in the text that i think it's impossible to really argue one of them is "not" human without making implications about the other. in desperate measures, lovelace tells kepler he's "not human" and he responds "you're hilarious. on a multitude of levels." later, defending lovelace against kepler's repeated dehumanization, hera very pointedly uses the phrase "that woman." in out of the loop, hera says she's never met anyone who "worked so hard at being inhuman" as jacobi, who says "what do you know about being human?" hera very emphatically responds, "i know plenty." later, defending hera against jacobi's repeated dehumanization, minkowski pointedly uses the phrase "that woman." with the care taken towards language and the way scenes and turns of phrase will parallel each other, that's not a coincidence. it might seem strange to have the "non-human" characters be the ones to express criticisms based on perceived "humanity" (something hera will do in other contexts as well - "we don't have funerals for animals" etc.) but in the broader context of the show, i think it's the point.

so, whether hera would ever call herself human, or be comfortable with that, is a complicated question for another time and depends on a lot of other factors. but wolf 359 is a show about humanity, it includes her within its definition of what it means to be human, and i wouldn't be comfortable definitively saying she's not human because of that. it can't be a neutral statement within the particular context of this show.

#wolf 359 #w359 #hera wolf 359 #there are so many concepts here that could be posts on their own #but this is already too long. sorry. #i think it's also worth noting how often i see the discussion of hera and humanity conflated with the discussion of #whether hera would want a body and while i think there's some degree of influence in that. if she has human experiences without human form #there's something uniquely isolating about that that could influence her decision. BUT. the form she exists or doesn't exist in #is separate from whether the show includes her within its 'in group' of humanity. which thematically it does. #hera can be considered equally human without ever having any type of physical form. that's part of expanding the definition #and i think that's an important distinction. #anyway sorry i'm kind of passionate about this it just. doesn't quite sit right with me i guess #in a lot of cases i think it's important to acknowledge that non-human characters have different experiences from human ones and #a lot of science fiction will (or should) decentralize the human experience. but it's core to the themes of wolf 359. it's different. #i think hera is so interesting as a take on the 'human AI' character because. the mistake a lot of them make is having a character #'learn how to be human' and it feels patronizing. but hera is. a fundamentally human person who has been told she isn't #and internalized that. and i think that's much more complex and. well. human. i know she's just a fictional character but #i can't help but feel a little defensive sometimes #it's also part of a larger discussion but feeling inhuman is a not uncommon human experience. it is within those bounds

[athiestpaladin]

if (when) byler becomes canon, i feel like (on full rewatch) it'll end up feeling like the core of the stranger things plot with how much of the story can be seen as parallels or double meanings about them; molded to them

#byler #like sure st is about monstas and psychics and why you shouldnt steal children and experiment on their mind and open a rift to another world #but its also about THEM and their lil journey #also the part about el (probably) ending up on her own will b VERY pawesome and important #it's always been a self discovery story #conforming to social norms then discovering you dont have to and sometimes its better not to #stranger things #stranger things 5 #st5 #mike wheeler #will byers #disclaimer that im not saying the only important arc in st #but its really is the purest form of the message st is telling

[gammija]

i think what defences of barbie against feminist critique on here seem to miss, is that, while yes, a lot of girls grew up with barbie and had fun with her and didn't feel as if her unrealistic body type had any influence on them... that doesn't mean this product wasn't made to appeal to young girls and used a specific body type and aesthetic to do so. Like, it can be both 'barbie empowered lots of girls' and 'barbie, as a huge influential brand, both broke some sexist standards and expectations for women but perpetuated several others'

#as an aside. implicit discrimination also exists and might be more pernacious. #have you as a kid EVER seen a commercial in which a boy plays with barbies? #perhaps those have come about in recent years but i sure havent. and even if those exist now id bet that no such commercial exists with #ONLY a boy or several boys playing with barbie #Joos yaps #probably a #delete later #but you know. i DID feel a sick feeling as a little girl walking through the Girl Isle in a toy store and seeing just pinks and yellows #so neither experience is universal #just because a lot of girls broke the basic template their barbies came with doesn't mean BarbieTM didn't put that template there #and it's fine to discuss the more nuanced and less fun and girlpower parts of culture. in fact id say its somewhat important

[blazeball]

are you fucking kidding me the parker tweets channel is gone in the blaseball discord???? when did that happen??????

#i'm actually a little mad about that because that channel held some lore important tweets that he deleted #and i can't scroll back far enough on the actual blaseball twitter to get to the season 24 tweets (which i want to see really badly) becaus #of twitters bonkers ass horrible 600 post limit or whatever. i scrolled as far as i could and i only got to january #i'm actually like a little upset right now... the twitter is such a big part of the experience #poking through the sibr discord for an archive but its very cluttered so. we'll see if i have any luck? #quincy.txt

[ariadne-mouse]

they really committed to making every Vax and Gilmore interaction Like That and it's really sweet

#i remember seeing 2nd-hand accounts of complaints that they'd somehow not given that aspect of the character relationships its due #and first of all i'm very pleased to have curated my media experience that i never saw any of that directly #but also... are we watching the same show?? #the chemistry and care between vax and gilmore underscores every interaction they have #endgame schmendgame this aspect of them is just as important #and again I'm not a c1 scholar but it seems to me they are honoring that part of the story really well in the series! #the narrative holds space for that affection without diminishing it or vax's journey with keyleth #tlovm #critical role #c1 #tlovm spoilers #op #vax #gilmore #vaxmore

[neolxzr]

Literally a genuine question no ill intent

What do you like about Aira? As much as people are absolutely adamant Akira is projecting (I really don't think he is (I'm not saying Akira is innocent) I just think he's trying to address the prejudiced thoughts the average Japanese person will have on the Ainu) Aira's weird comments and behaviour to Hiiro have been there since day one. And I also think Aira being the one who says all this is because he's supposed to reflect the fans and the average Japanese fan probably isn't that educated on the Ainu + there can be a good few racist enstars fans...

I'm not trying to sound heated about this I'm just coming from a genuine place, what appeal is there in Aira?

Also, as much as the Aira fans are talking about blaming Akira, I feel like there should absolutely be a focus on Hiiro right now considering that comment was... yknow said to him. I just think we should actually be talking about the Amagis considering that comment was intended to discuss the Amagis and their culture and the discrimination they go through.

i had someone ask me a similar question once but not in the context of all thats happening currently so you can read that here if youre inclined

buuuut what made me like aira so much in the first place was honestly that his concept as a character is really funny. i made a post a long while back that went into the funny meta jokes that you could make using aira as a character before i really knew much about enstars at all. having a character in your idol series that loves idols and canonically reads fanfic about them is just a funny concept in general. and as i continued to read more he continued to be funny and annoying and endearing (his little mini interaction with midori comes to mind immediately. there is something wrong with him)

also i tend to gravitate towards characters that give me like. little sibling energy. i love having a favorite little guy to dote on

but afterwards what really drew me to him was the main story!! thermometry specifically comes to mind (ouuugh,,,,). his feature scout stories are also great and so is feather touch! i wont like. go into detail really cause my blog is covered in me talking about aira already

his dynamic with hiiro is one of my favorites too, especially in mainstory. their dynamic isnt JUST aira says shitty things to hiiro and thats it. their relationship develops really far to the point where aira admits that he needs hiiro as much as hiiro needs him. they're young and inexperienced and kind of codependent as they're trying to keep themselves from going under in a sort of cutthroat industry. i think thats really neat. their relationship is really sweet to me and aira is a great tsundere type of character. he regularly is shown to actually like hiiro a lot as mean as he can be to him sometimes i.e. here. and you know the whole holding hands thing (which they also fucked up in the climax story but Whatever)

theres also this. which i think about regularly. the hiiai shipping fuel is vast

and additionally i think aira has some really great relationships with other characters too, alkaloid especially. feather touch develops his relationship with tatsumi a lot and its one of my favorite aira moments. i couldnt find my screenshots for this one but basically aira gives tatsumi his unlocked phone (something VERY important to aira since hes a little screenager) and it shows tatsumi just how much aira trusts him and he realizes how important aira is as a friend to him. being someone with a history like him aira's friendship is sort of new to him and it helps them both grow

he loves his friends so so much and he’s had a positive impact on all of alkaloid. he is its heart after all

but in any case i'm not going to like, defend myself for liking aira. i am aware that the shitty stuff has been there from the start but i've said something similar in the past that was like. aira isn't real and he cannot take accountability for what he says. he's a character written by real people who doesn't have any control over how he acts. so i guess that's why when i think the writers write something i dont think he would do or say in my own personal aira opinion i can sort of brush it off as just bad writing.

and not in the sense that i dont recognize that enstars sucks, because it does. enstars can be terribly racist sometimes and not just when concerning aira, and thats important to talk about (i.e. the orient cards, the king of thieves cards, etc). but at the end of the day the most important thing to recognize is the people and company behind the game as well as the real people who play the game and are affected by it. and not like, the specific characters in the game. cause they didn't actually do anything or feel anything you know

#cryn answers #anon #enstars #media analysis #im a miraculous ladybug fan im used to pretending that the thing i like is better than it actually is lmfao #was including sources for what im saying too much?? #anyway i didnt even touch on airas own experiences with racial discrimination #i dont think its written perfectly so thats why i didnt talk about it but its an important aspect of his character too #and an important part in his place in alkaloid #also i hope i dont come off as rude or upset in this anon #i appreciate you being respectful #but also im a little tired of talking about this ill admit it #i enjoyed rambling about aira again im just like :( that its cause of all the discourse and whatever happening right now #blegh #i think its kind of like. i mean if you only hear little tidbits of what a character is like through twitter screenshots #youre not gonna have a full picture #and i think thats how it is for a lot of enstarries with aira #and thats not a jab at anyone i dont know jackshit about like. mama or undead or fine or akatsuki. and thats fine #theres too many characters for me to know everything about everyone #but with aira specifically his only character trait to the people who dont produce alkaloid is 'the racist one' #and that sucks #but anyways. thats all i have in me for now

[dullahandyke]

You guys keep falling for people going 'lol you're identifying the wrong way' wrt queer identities so I made you a flow chart

Is your anger against this label because it facilitates genuine harm towards others (eg. MAPs)? Godspeed and good luck to you.

Is your anger against this label because it is Using The Label Wrong and doesn't gel with your personal definition for this label (eg. MOGAI, bi lesbians, lesboys)? I'm sorry, but there's always gonna be people who identify in ways that you disagree with, and with something as intangible as queer identity, their stance has as much merit as your own. If you get ticked seeing someone IDing as both homosexual and bisexual, ask yourself if they're genuinely hurting anyone, and if not, let them be. You will never know the intricacies of someone else's identity, and if that's how they choose to define themselves, well, tough shit.

#like i id as both mspec and lesbian bcos i am genuinely unsure where the line is in my experiences #or if i even wanna draw the line #btw this isnt some holier-than-thou I Know Better thing this is also a reminder for myself #its been years and im still working on not reacting with vitriol when an american has irish heritage so they id as irish #like you do genuinely have to ask yourself 'what do i stand to gain from isolating myself from these people who want to bond with me' #and like its EASY to go 'i hate irish americans acting like they know ireland waheyyy fuck the yanks' #'theyre not even from here they dont know what ireland is like theyre not irelanders' #but at some point i realised that man. this just feels mean. i dont like this #irelands identity is based upon the people who live on the land. not the land the people live on #according to myth the first settlers werent the celts and they died out long ago and yet theyre still irish #and hearing someone discussing that myth go 'i think its wonderful that so many people share a heritage and appreciation for ireland' #'there are people in america and asia and africa who all have a claim to being irish' #'and acknowledging that is an important part to being irish' #and i thought man i WOULD like to acknowledge that it sounds nice #so when i see plastic paddy irish americans i Keep My Fucking Mouth Shut! #this is a memory but its also a metaphor for the queer community. hashtag words

[bijoumikhawal]

"Biden is the best choice and he's actually really empathetic and reasonable but also you can't wait for a candidate that won't do genocide and war crimes because to become a presidential candidate you have to be willing to do that" see what you fundamentally don't understand is I'm not waiting for a candidate that won't do war crimes, because I know that. I cannot morally stomach this system, it's a joke to claim its democratic, and AMERICA DELENDA EST. this country is a plague on this Earth

#cipher talk #It's baffling because okay so you know how fucked up this is but you're behaving in a way that clearly indicates you want that this shambli #Disgusting empire to cling to life until after you're dead because it'd make /you/ uncomfortable and inconvenienced #To live through its destruction (the wealthier classes and more privileged experience lesser material changes in state collapse so long as #They aren't too highly ranked/involved in politics. A Sri Lankan wrote an article specifically addressing Americans about this) #It's so dehumanizing! People's blood is so cheap to you! You've just accepted its inevitable that genocide will happen! #Because of how the US operates! You can see no other future! It hardly matters to you! #You say this like the death of Palestinians of Yemenis of Syrians is someone else's dropped ice cream cone #You understand why people hate this country and you understand we deserve it but it just. Hardly matters to you #It feels like madness to watch this. It's disgusting #I keep thinking- it'd be so easy for you to justify my people being killed if violence broke out and it was in your favor #It's unlikely because. Well. America loves 'the church of the martyrs' #But you'd do it if that was favorable. You wouldn't think twice. You might feel a twinge in your heart but that's all #Because we aren't people to you! #We aren't all that important! Not important enough for you do anything more than 'well let's vote a blue in and do some protests' #What's a protest worth if you perpetuate the system and can't see a way out and don't try for a way out? #That's killing a man then putting flowers on his casket. It's /perverse/. #You get used to the idea that Africans die that West Asians die and that's just the way of the world. My g-d do you understand anything?? #I watch necrosis take hold my parts of my culture and I watch every good person I know be ground to dust under a military regime #I talk to my friend who got drafted and is trans and may never come out because if they do they can get arrested as a 'prostitute' #I watch the wild hope for the future I was introduced to over radio at 9 years old wither #I watch people risk it anyway because just past the fence they can see they know there are people there #I watch my neighbor to the south crumble and weep because our hands are bloody and it's in part because we bloodied them for the west #And you just think that's how things are. #Fascist white death cult mindset

[kj-munch]

the girl… IS REAL!!!!!

#not fully happy w how her face came out esp the eyes but its OKAY #learning experience :3 #her face has eluded me for a whiiile anyway its why i dont just draw her very often #most important part nyanyway is that shes REAL and can hang out on my desk #since i have all the supplies now too hopefully ill make more to keep improving

[konfizry]

ahhh i just remembered alphen and shionne are gonna be at the next tales of festival again and damn that's three times in a row for them!!! that's amazing (for me specifically)!! like genuinely i assumed last year would be the last time they were gonna have both of 'em on, bcause, well it can't be the arise Celebrity Couple all the time, everybody's probably sick of them already and the hype's gone down and all that, and heck they even hinted at that in one of the kagenare, but!! against all odds i get yet another year or shimoji and satotaku performing together

#they've only been announced for day 2 and i'm being so brave about it #and to think we probably have BtD to thank for that......... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaahhhhh #anyway i gotta enjoy this while it lasts until arise eventually fades into obscurity byyyeeee #but *will it* fade into obscurity tho #because like as a matter of fact it very much did sell 3million copies #so you could argue thats like. a Milestone. a Whole Thing. Arise has left a permanent mark on the series #and is on its way towards becoming one of the quote unquote Important Titles like symphonia or uuhhhh symphonia!!! (vesperia???) #but on the other hand. is that *really* the case like #like ok thats a LOT of sales but. that doesnt mean it's necessarily gonna have the cultural IMPACT like. #the tales fandom dislikes it for one #and so like. like statistically most of the ppl who bought it are like. they're not in the fandom right. like. they played it and moved on #(god i wish that were me) #like that's what im asking is arise gonna be a cultural milestone in the series even #and like. yes and no??? lmao. because like. there's a high likelihood that the upcoming games are gonna be more like arise right #since that sells. and so. well those subsequent games are gonna draw in ppl who like that type of experience :))) so #uh. YEAH. yknow like WHAT IM SAYING IS #as much as zestiria broke the fanbase it's more likely that there's gonna be 2 distinct pre- and post-arise eras #right. uuuhhh. the pre-arise fans and the post-arise fans are just not the same ppl. (for the most part) #anyway so probably arise is not fading into obscurity aaaaaaarrgghhh noooo #but at the same time like. less and less side materials (manga; drama CDs; comic anthologies etc) are being made so what does it matter #what does it matter if they keep arise alive if it's just to routinely sell figurines and uhhh *checks notes* booze and acrylic stands #anyway i'm so excited for the next ToFestival!!!!!!! #toarise hate #im this close to saying arise has destroyed the fandom for good in favor of casuals who are not interested in the Fandom Experience but #im not saying it. i dont know that.

[vaniellia]

since when did spotify have a fucking lyrics limit

#nah what is that shit #that lyric box thingy is literally one of the most important part of my spotify experience #spotify what is this #AND ITS A MONTHLY LIMIT?!?! #it would be okay or smth if it was daily but MONTHLY?!? #bro i aint waiting a month to view lyrics #and like i need to export the lyrics or whatever like yk #spotify. i have no money to buy premium i sweaR JUST STOP #im not sure if this update is old or not #i dont focus unless it is inoperable #txt #just me ranting

[lovelyrotter]

yknow i think a lot of the really far-gone transfemme vs transmasc people who still play by the 6th grade milquetoast "trans women are targeted way more than trans men cause femininity is bad and masculinity is good In Our Society, so trans men get free acceptability passes" feminism forget that trans men/transmascs started life. as. little girls. we were mistaken, from birth, for baby girls. and we were raised by our parents to believe that we were little girls.

a lot of trans men and transmascs then grew up to be teenaged girls

a lot of trans men and transmascs were adult women too

and for a while we *believed* we were girls and women. some of us even WISHED we were girls and women (points at myself). and much more importantly, we were continually seen as girls and women. a lot of the time, we are STILL seen as girls and women, even with full fuckin beards and baritone voices. especially if we need to go to any kind of medical professional. this is what our free acceptability pass looks like?

its just so much more nuanced than these 'boys vs girls' people ever seem to care to think about. even binary trans folks dont have the same sense of cisgendered binary that cis people do. we literally cross from one fake end of the fake-binary to the other. thats where the trans in transgender comes from. i dont know how some other trans folks seem to forget that?? i don't know how, somewhere along the line, we forgot that trans men and transmascs also directly suffer under misogyny?

#my t #sorry for more gender based griping i saw smth on twitter that reminded me of this. #the bright spots of Little Girl euphoria i had in my childhood were rare and beautiful. i refuse to forget them. #my perception of myself i had as a child is important to me. #possibly in a different way to others because. yknow. i am plural. #and plural folks have a different brain and sense of understanding of themselves that singlets wont have. its just a neurological differenc #but my little girl self is an important part of my present day adult man self. #and looking at the adult trans men in my system who are still under my care today- #the little girls they were - however fucking briefly - are still important to me and to them too. #and i fully understand that a lot of other trans folks cannot think of themselves this way #but trans mens experiences of being mistaken for little girls are as important as trans womens experiences being mistaken for little boys #we are all trapped in the same systemic cycle of gender-based abusive conditioning. #really we just have to do away with assigning gender to baby bits completely. its weird. #trans men are either eternally confused women or just invisible #and crushed under the weight of maintaining a cis-man image. #i mean for fucks sake #my partner system and us have been talking about having a kid for ages #if i were to get pregnant i'd just have to accept the fact that i have to masquerade around as a woman for 9 months. #because there is NOTHING for pregnant transmascs. #nothing. #there aren't even a lot of gender neutral options for maternity clothing. #even the term 'maternity' denotes femininity and motherhood. #paternity clothing isn't a thing that exists for me for look forward to or even mildly worry about. #and i'm just talking about a *planned* pregnancy involving a trans man. what do yall think happens to transmascs with unwanted pregnancies. #what a privileged life i lead as a no-op no-hrt trans man. big cishet loves me because i am obviously exactly like a cis man now #just want people to stop infighting and being stupid tbh. #breaking: bro strider fictive gets really fuckin pressed about gender and systemic abuse again!

[dandyshucks]

yall this old lady craft group is the best thing ever and i want to cry thinking abt how grateful i am to have it fjfkdl i think this might be the one group that i feel wholly welcomed into and actually a real part of for the first time in my life ;-; ♡

the group leader always seems to want me to sit next to her and her daughter is always interested in seeing what im working on when she comes at the end and she also tells me abt different crochet patterns she's seen on fb marketplace or she brings in old patterns for me to look through and take what i want, and then the card maker lady is offering to give me this big old crocheted clown doll that her mum made her years ago and she immediately offered to give me a ride home without me even saying anything (so that i wouldnt have to try take it home on the bus fjdkdl), and they were all super excited for me when i told them I was able to fix my accordion, and they just... treat me like an equal and a human person and fjdksl man ... it's so nice

AND IM JUST 😭💗 about it all !!!! it all feels so foreign to me !!!! i do not know when I've ever felt so fully part of a group and an equal to everyone there !!!

#and theyre always so happy to see me when i arrive fjfkdl #I've had coworkers be happy to see me but thats always been bc i was like... useful and made them feel good LMAO #its so easy to have coworkers enjoy ur presence if u do ur job well and compliment them when they do things well #or even just like. hey i like ur shoes. just simple things go a long way #so ppl have been happy to see me in the past but its only been bc i was useful to them ;-; #BUT THIS !!! this is just me being part of a group !!! i am an equal !!! its such a wild feeling !!! #im like... a full person !! its crazy !! #now granted. idk if they'd treat me the same if they knew that im queer and like. very mentally ill but DHDJDLL #thats okay idk i can live with not sharing those aspect of me bc it doesnt feel important in that setting #AUGGHHH it is just such a good feeling idk fjfldl i wish i could express it better #when u have been lesser ur entire life it is so incredible and wonderful to be treated as an equal #i did not realize how EASY it could be to socialize and feel safe with ppl if they'd just ... treat u like a human and an equal #like idk if I've ever felt so safe in my life around other ppl before fjfkdl this is crazy #ANYWAYS IM GETTING TOO DEEP ABT IT MAYBE SORRY FJFKDL im just soooo in awe that i get to experience this #and i wanted to share this bit of joy djfkdld #dandy.cmd