#ive been drawing them for almost a year at this point and i still get embarrassed at the idea of posting abt them im sorry </3

[tianhai03]

❤️🧟💙

#bro the emojis look hideous as i am posting this i hope they look normal to everyone else LMAO #uhhh hi danteleon nation. i finally decided to be brave and post a proper drawing of them on main #ive been drawing them for almost a year at this point and i still get embarrassed at the idea of posting abt them im sorry </3 #anyways. giga's remix of deco*27's zombies is good go listen to it. and hope everyone had a good halloween! #devil may cry #dante(dmc) #resident evil #leon s kennedy #danteleon #allyart

[mischefous]

👆this is me when i see ur art

HJKAKFKEKKAKEHFJK this lowkey jumpscared me XD, just me scrolling through my asks and BOO! SKELETON WITH BULGING EYES

on the other hand, this is me seeing all the lovely kind words about my art, it brings happy tears to my eyes. THANK YOU EVERYONE!!! I LOVE YOU ⋆⭒˚.⋆💙

#also guys ive already got a ton of awesome requests #keep em coming! #i ofc wont be able to get them all done #but i am tryna get most done. im very slow with each one because im taking my time and enjoying drawing these #if i rush then i wont be enjoying it as much and ill burn out quicker #and if i dont get to yours at this point in time #i will come back to them later #but thank you to everyone who has sent me a request! #ALSO ALMOST FORGOR #some requests i just dont get a clear picture in my head for. but dont take it to heart if i never get around to your request #i usually have a faint image in my head that i try to replicate #i still really appreciate the time you took to put in a request💙 #yall should see my pen XD its literally being held together with tape #might go grab a new one on the weekend. ive been putting it off bc its really expensive to replace #its been taped up since last year XD

[arolesbianism]

Thinking abt the random card au again. Why must it go so crazy hard I miss it sm

#rat rambles #random card au #no matter how far I drift from my bndori and sekai peak days the random card au keeps hitting me like a truck every now and then #it just scratches an itch that I havent been able to satisfy since my cr days years and years ago #I wouldnt say the random card au has super similar worldbuilding to my old cr stuff as that was much more large scale #but it still has a similar appeal to me I think #I think its the building entirely new worldbuilding based off of designs and general vague starting concepts and bringing them all together #that gets me invested as it feels so satisfying slotting it all together and then actually getting to play out the story in this new web #I loveeeee jumbled webs of worldbuilding and characters that all tie together in a way that makes it almost impossible to completely #seperate one cast of characters from another #I love the feeling of a world with a bunch of intertwining plots like that even if it makes it near impossible to format a normal story #like my cr stuff was just so much man I still miss it sometimes even if I hate cr itself #Ive become a much better story creator too now so I know I could make what I had so much better nowadays and I already like my old stuff #it just makes me all the more sad that I went so crazy hard on worldbuilding for a franchise that sucks ass </3 #it may have been two of the worst years of my life but Ill also never reach that worldbuilding high again I think #oh also it made me actually start the slow slow process of getting more ambitious with my art and doing more digital stuff #rly thats the biggest reason the random card au pains me so since I wanna post stuff for it but man do I not wanna draw anyone from it #first of all human characters so already eh but also Id have to adapt the cards theyre based on into a design I can actually draw #so as much as I wanna make a billion random card au animatics I cant even bring myself to draw them normally #you see olivia and jackie are easier to draw because I just made shit up for their designs and as such made their designs very simple #but I cant just make shit up for bndori and sekai characters they actually have designs and hair that Id have to adapt to my style it sucks #I just wanna draw doggy arisa is that so much to ask for (yes yes it is I dont wanna figure out her hood) #also rip mygo yall will probably never get in but who knows maybe one day Ill have my second bndori era and then y'all will get in #its rly just the fact that they likely wont have enough cards to properly add them for another few years #especially if that other band also gets in if that happens neither are getting enough cards until the servers shut down lol #like I Could just pick and choose but thats boring #kinda ruins the point of the au y'know? #like tbf Ive cheated in the past by reroling two and limiting my options with several sekai characters #but thats just because at the time most sekai characters had almost no usable cards for this au and the two I rerolled were also unusable #like Im sorry but I couldnt just add normal ass hagumi and masking it wasn't happening

[utvarpcity]

went to the apple store to get two old phones recycled…… left longing for an ipad with apple pencil. sigh

#when i say old phones i really mean old phones i use mine until theyre almost falling apart #and apparently youre supposed to bring them to the apple store so they can take out reusable materials and stuff #one’s been stowed away in a steel box (bc swollen battery) in my wardrobe forever. finally went to the apple store #apparently there are only three in my entire country and two of them are in my neck of the woods so i have no excuse #third is in täby which is a rich people suburb to stockholm lmao i don’t even know how to get there #anyway i have an old piece of plastic tablet that ive prob used for 10 years now #i wish i could afford one of those w a screen but then i heard getting an ipad is cheaper + more convenient and works just as well #but i mean it’s still too expensive for me. and i have a small cheap laptop i use for school so when it kicks it i’ll make the switch #to an ipad i think. since i only use it for schoolwork anyway. so then i could get one for the dual purpose of school+drawing #tried out drawing on procreate at the store and i thought it was going to be difficult drawing on a screen like that when im not used to it #but holy hell it was so smooth and easy and great. if i had one of those i would never put it down #much easier to draw directly on the Thing rather than the disconnect of drawing on one thing and viewing another #like i’ve been drawing digitally almost everyday for more than half my life at this point but i’m still way worse than i am traditionally #it’s stupid. i’m stupid. and SUCK at drawing lol #but maybe i wouldn’t so much if i used the ipad……

[drdemonprince]

When other people say that they do not have enough time to get something done, they (often, if they're quite healthy) mean they are taking into account the time it takes to do the laundry and arrange new pieces of furniture and cook dinner and meet up with friends to see a movie and run to the post office or the hair dresser and take the dog for walks and do the dishes and paint their nails and drive to the store and go to their cousin's wedding and go to the barbecue their friend is throwing on the weekend

they don't winnow their life down to just spending time at the computer, working from when they wake up until they cannot focus their eyes anymore, granola bars, coffee, and bottles of water all around them because of course they did not take time to have lunch or breakfast, only dragging themselves away from work when they are truly too exhausted to do any of it anymore, and then lacking the energy to do much of anything that remains of life but to eat a tiny bit more, sponge themselves off, and go to sleep.

i just saw a video of a fursuiter on their bed, legs kicked back, head propped on their hands, delightedly announcing that after many years of hard work they had finally finished their Master's degree. And some part of me, some sick withered part, thought really? you had time to do a Master's degree while also getting a fursuit done? and going to conventions, presumably? you had time in the day to research fursuit makers, have a sona designed and drawn by someone else (or to draw it yourself), to contact a maker to make a duck tape dummy of yourself, and to have a friend over to help you make it and to cut it off of you, to send it in the mail to the maker, to then get it and make videos? you had time to set up this beautiful bedroom that i see in your video, with a soft pink sham on the bed and LED lights behind your bookshelf and lamps and all kinds of stuffed toys? you had a life? you were out playing, and dancing, and pursuing your hobbies, and you did a master's degree?

because when i was working on my doctorate, there was nothing. three layers of foam on the floor with a fitted sheet over it. a folding card table from aldi that had cost $40 that my grandparents got me. no food in the fridge. no time to even get the internet installed, just stolen wi-fi when my laptop could pick it up. i woke up, got dressed, and slunk into the office. i sat alone in the dark working until my hunger made me furious and i could not write another word. and then i walked to the grocery store, got something to subsist on, went home, ate, kickboxing video, went to sleep. every day. with almost nothing breaking the routine.

and ive gotten better, so much better, but my brain still kind of works that way. i feel like i have to quit my job and stop being a writer if i want to have hobbies. to paint my bedroom. to marinate a meat for longer than fifteen minutes. to get a driver's license again. to take a trip. but i dont want to be like that any more. how do people know when to stop? i feel like i have to give everything my absolute all until there is nothing left or else i have done nothing. i feel that i would have to treat a hobby like a job to get it done. I feel that anything that takes more than two minutes is a huge waste of time i must feel guilty for. i am working on all these things. jesus i have been working on them for years at this point. but because i have been so successful at telling people to do less, i get pulled in. interview. workshop invitation. email. urgent in the subject line. call from my agent. meeting request from my boss. new book idea, better sell it now while my sales figures still look good. recording studio session. deadline. writing. can you talk about this. can you talk about that. tag. email. book idea. deadline. long heartfelt email. still so often i have to take my own damn advice.

and this is why i am getting a fursuit made!! and going to cons! and going to leather and latex events! and making socials that are separate for these things!! i am going to let myself be silly and soft and do frivolous things. i am so sick of what i do to myself, all the pursuit of seeming like a strong mature adult.

[wiltkingart]

Do you have any advice on how 2 not overwork a drawing? Over-detailing my art (to the detriment of the final result) is a big weakness of mine, and ive been working on it lately, but simplifying my art is way harder than I thought itd be. I keep getting stuck in a mentality that less detail = less effort, even though all my struggling should prove that isnt true lol. & I almost always like my simpler drawings better, even though that makes me feel kinda lazy…as long as it’s fun tho, right? [1/2]

I’m asking here bc one of the things I adore about your work is how confident and striking your paintings feel. I really admire the way colors and shape language interact in your art…I always want to keep looking to see what I can find hidden in the details, but they don’t take away from the main focus of the image. How do you manage to strike that balance? [2/2] (sorry for the long question lol)

honestly this is still something i struggle with at times! but some things that have helped me are:

- identifying which parts i tend to overwork the most. for me thats faces so i have made it a conscious habit to render faces last. that way i can match my level of face rendering to the rest of the piece.

- working on all parts of the painting at once. some artists are able to work on a painting from section to section. this is not me, regardless of detail level. jumping around all over the place keeps me from focusing too hard on one section above others. i even take this one step further by working on 2+ paintings simultaneously but there is something wrong with me for this one i'll admit.

- staying zoomed out for as long i can. this goes in hand with the previous point but when you're zoomed out its easier to lay down the biggest/primary color blocks without the temptation to detail. once the main color blocks are nicely balanced its easier to pick out a few points of interest to add spots of detail to, and restrain myself to them. (easier said than done! but i try!)

- getting comfortable with backtracking / deleting overworked sections and layers. this might seem scary but this has saved my ass more times than you might think. i always save a version of my drawings before i merge everything / start rending so i can always copy over earlier sections if needed.

- cold turkey removing details from the equation for a while. i did this more from necessity than choice, because i was struggling with my health a few years back and had zero energy to sink into art for long hours. but looking on the bright side it helped me realize what details are/aren't necessary and how to build my features from big -> small. this progression of my patho art shows pretty well how i introduced details back into my work over time.

but yeah! sometimes i do still find myself creeping a little too close to overwork territory for comfort, even with all these safeguards in place. in that case i have to accept that not every piece i put out will be my 'best' and that perfection has no place in art. that's not the point of it!

simplifying forms isn't easy, the same way abstract art isn't lazy. but with all things it can be learned with enough practice. and if you decide at the end of it all that you still like drawing a lot details, it might be a matter of readjusting how / where you implement them. best of luck <3

#long post #ask wilt

[lab-gr0wn-lambs]

Hello! Do you have any tips on stylizing/drawing real people?? recently ive been trying to draw from my favorite shows but they either look too realistic or just not like the person at all. I love all your twd art and its really inspiring!

Omg thank you so much, it’s actually so funny you should ask this because this is exactly what I’ve been struggling with/researching for like 6 months. In fact I had an independent research project at uni that I told my prof was gonna be all about learning how to make background art for my final film project. But I got SO into learning how to stylize real people that I forgot to do the project at all and just submitted all of my walking dead fanart and stylization research and somehow got a B+ 

So strap in, you are about to get blasted with a hyperfixation that was so strong it almost lost me my bachelors degree but instead (somehow!!) got me one of the highest grades this prof gave out this semester

I’m still learning and trying to get better, this hyperfixation isn’t over it just has to be on pause because I WILL fail my final year of university if I let it take me lmao

First of all, here are my project slides (PLEASE ignore my cringe-ass writing, most of that shit was done in a panic at 5am)

this was a good leaping off point and now I know their features like the back of my hand, but they're missing a lot of character imo

"I thought highlighting his eyelashes and freckles would bring out-" blahblabla, truth is I just think he is very Eyes and his freckles are cute but I can't just be saying ''it's about the VIBES sir''

I highly recommend looking at an artist called @geitonas. They were actually my biggest inspiration in this project because personally I think they’ve mastered stylizing real people and their art is how I want my walking dead fanart to be. They know exactly which features to push and which to downplay, so if you’re familiar with the subjects you can recognize them immediately. 

But the biggest thing to note is that their features aren’t replicated exactly, they just have the right energy.

I guess my biggest advice is pick a focus feature. For Carol I think her most defining feature is her nose. It's an odd thing to say but she has very distinctive nostrils. So no matter how stylized I draw her I try to keep this feature in mind, even if everything else goes out the window

Keeping an eye on someone's unique mannerisms and facial expressions can go a long way too. Rick's squint, Michonne's stare, Daryl's scrunch...

This turned into a ramble. My thoughts were more coherent but too many of them wanted to come out all at once. Hope this was helpful anyway!

#asks #twd #the walking dead #scribbles #edit: these images were aranged better but I guess the ask format forces them into one long line sorry

[ge]

what do you like about rotmhs? like what draws you in?

GAHH IM SO GLAD YOU ASKEDDD at the top of my head thhe top three things i felt really drew me into and made me fall in love w rotmhs is the found family/bonds before blood narrative, the action/fight scenes, and the comedy..

rotmhs is not a romance and i feel like that really pushes people away from reading it, especially folks who were first introduced to east asian novels through bl (specifically mxtxs novels like mdzs tgcf etc etc) which i feel is incredibly disappointing because yallre missing out on a certain depth of writing and nuance you otherwise wouldnt get in a romance focused novel. (orv is another extremely popular knovel with no romance.. if you like orv PLEASE give rotmhs a shot)

rotmhs is about a dead man resurrected a hundred years into the future having to come to terms w the fact that everyone he loved is dead and that the only home he ever had was destroyed, its inhabitants and centuries worth of teachings burned to the ground, and that it was partially his fault these things happened, so in order to prevent a future catastrophe he knows is on the horizon, he trains the youth of this new generation and finds a new home surrounded by ghosts in the wreckage of his home of his past

⬆️…very dramatic but somewhat accurate barebones synopsis of rotmhs which is fairly faithful enough methinks.. rotmhs doesnt make a point of going ‘heyy these guys are family nowww theyre brothers and sisters and love each other like familyyy’ LOL the growth is very subtle and before u can really blink ur like ‘oh man.. chung myung would kill for these kids. obliviously though. i dont think he knows he even likes them’ all the while hes still aching w the loss of his loved ones before.. if we’re being really really honest chung myung, the mc, truly is the star of the show and a character i got attached to incredibly quickly.. hes so stupid but so smart he has so many issues i want to hit him with my car then nurse him back to health just to hit him again

chung myung himself is a whole other thing i could get into but he has so many layers.. so much depth.. on the surface ud look at him and think what a punk but look a little closer and then ud think oh this punk has depression ptsd survivors guilt hallucinations etc etc LIKE DAMN.. I THIUGHT HE WAS JUST A FUNNY LITTLE GUY WHYD I GET SUCKER PUNCHED

what was i even talking about. OH right romance. please please dont let the lack of romance dissuade you, imo it is soooo refreshing to read something that isnt focused on romance like i love yaoi like the next bl reading bitch but damn.. ive always been into found family and while the bl novels i have read did always have a little hint of it, i always wanted more and rotmhs fills that void

(that being said i cant stop yall from shipping if yall want LOL im guilty of shipping charas too despite everythiing i just said… if yall want yalls yaoiyuri fix may i direct yalls attention to the ‘doomed by the narrative, tragic best-friends-to-almost-lovers tangchung’ & ‘love at first sight sweethearts iseolsoso’ ….. :SMILES: I LOVE TANGCHUNG..!!!!!!)

NEXT, the action and fight scenes in rotmhs, even in written text form, are sublime to say the least.. my fail cis dudebro trait is that i love crazy insane adrenaline rushing heart pumping shounen-esque battles so much that i could typically care less for the rest of that specific piece of media as long as the fights are good.. FORTUNATELY FOR ME rotmhs is crazy good at balancing its comedy, action, and otherwise more ‘mundane’ scenes together so harmoniously that its such fun read even when theres no swords crossing or heads being beaten in

also important to note, despite being a knovel w korean naming of characters/places, rotmhs actually takes place in ancient china in a wuxia setting so jumping head first into it wont be all that confusing for first time readers/cmedia fans and u can use ur knowledge of cnovels to fill in the gaps.

theres not really much more i have to say on the topic of fighting, im just personally a huge fan of the crazy spectacles rotmhs brings to the table.

saved this for last but THE COMEDY…!!!!!!!! after being soo dramatic w all my previous points and comments ur probably thnkng rotmhs is heavy and somber w no breathing room.. WELL YOURE WRONG. ROTMHS IS FUNNY AS HELL quips and jokes and simple funny actions and scenes litter nearly every page. i mentioned this novel balances its action and comedy well and im NOT LYING youd think maybe the heavy action and light comedy would awkwardly clash but u cldnt be more further from the truth.. rotmhs wears action and comedy like a pair of twin gloves

rotmhs handles its action and comedy in equal doses and it all fits together like matching puzzle pieces, like i really cant stress enough how fun it is to read. not every fight scene is somber, most of the time its chung myung oneshotting someone by hitting them across the head so hard they pass out..

unfortunately im not really the best at listing instances so its be better for u to go read it for urself but this scene from one of the later chapters is soo funny every time i read it i start giggling

(LIGHT/MINOR SPOILERS FOR THE NOVEL it probably doesnt even matter u wont even remember this when u start reading)

right so i think thats most of it.. too lazy to read through everything i just wrote so if nothing makes sense… well. …well!

rotmhs deserves to have the same amount of fame as ORV and MDZS and TGCF have and it is my civil duty as one of the oldest mxtx novel outlets on tumblr to put yall on it..

my thumbs hurt from typing so im done now but if u have anymore questions PLEASE ASK IM SO DESPERATE TO TALK ABOUT ROTMHS ok byyyeeeeeeee

#rotmhs #rotbb #return of the blossoming blade #return of the mount hua sect

[gunmetal-ring]

anon again. i'm sorry that i keep coming to you with this depressing messages but you seem like one of the few sane ppl in this fandom and i appreciate your honesty.

truth is im feeling really disillusioned with hellcheer lately. we don't have a lot of "canon" content so after a while, it gets tiring going thru the same 2 scenes over and over again (especially when one of them involves chrissy's death). ive been relying on fandom but it seems like it's slowed down. fics arent updated as frequently, not a lot of new artwork.

heck, even joe and grace have moved on. joe's career is taking off. grace is leaving acting. it just feels like everything that happened last summer has come to an end :(

Aw anon thats okay. Ty for thinking of my feelings though 💓 (and also im flattered that you think im sane lmao)

Unfortunately its the way things go, especially with small ships, especially especially in a fandom as hostile as this one is. People come together and build community and share their love for characters and then g(r)o(w) their separate ways again.

But not everybody does! You and me, for example. And ive got plenty of hellcheer mutuals that seem perfectly content to draw, write, and rb their little hearts out.

I for one am absolutely astounded that theres even a fandom for hellcheer, let alone one with such talent and breadth and depth of love! Our characters had 2 scenes. Our girl was killed just as it all began. Our boy died with her name on his lips. In all likelihood we will never see them together on our screens again.

But somehow. Those ~10 minutes managed to foster an entire community of people and keep us engaged and in love w the characters for almost a year at this point! With no dangling promises or false hope or anything! Like we all know the score and we still go hard for hellcheer. Incredible.

Idk maybe it's just bc ive only had brainworms like this for 2 other ships and 1 of them is even smaller and the other one is a clusterfuck of unimaginable proportions, so im a little biased in terms of community/fandom, but im just like... idk. I think its really incredible thats all. And a testament to the very real power and truth of hellcheer 🥰

All i can say anon is that the best way to keep a fandom/ship going is engagement. Likes on tumblr and kudos on ao3 are great. But whats even better and more motivating (and i say this as a fic writer/meme shitposter so im speaking the total truth lol) is reblogs and comments. Tell people how much you love their work and how much it means to you, it goes a very long way. And on the flip side of that - stay out of the infighting. All it does is sap your mental energy and the fandom infighting bullshit is a major contributor to why people leave. The negativity and bitterness warp your perspective and make it really hard to remember what we're here for - it's not anti-st*ddie or anti-qu*nn stans or anti-anti-hellcheer or what the fuck ever. We're here for hellcheer!

Sorry my $0.02 is now $2.00 bc i ramble lol its a fatal flaw of mine. Anyway im sorry if this is annoyingly positive or dismissive but im in a strangely upbeat mood rn so there you have it

#im not getting into the whole joe/grace career stuff bc ive talked abt it a million times and i dont want to invite more bad faith anons #op #hellcheer #ask #anon

[choccy-milky]

Hi! I started reading your story sometime in the last week and I’m OBSESSED! I normally don’t have much patience and can’t get myself to read anything past like 15k or anything that’s still being worked on, but your story hooked me almost instantly! I really liked the description and decided to give it a try and I’m so glad I did. The detailed descriptions you give pull me into the story and the way you seamlessly switch points of view feels so natural. I just wanted to let you know how much I’m enjoying reading so far and I’m excited for more! ❤️

AW TYSM😭😭 this means a lot, esp since ive been kinda self conscious about the length of my fic lately (and also how long its gonna end up being once im actually done LMFAO) and ik my chapters have gotten ginormous BAHAHA so im glad that even if you don't usually read long stuff you still gave my fic a try and enjoyed it so much + are looking forward to more!!💖💖so ty again😭🙏 AND as usual i'll be using this to answer other asks:

thank you and AA im glad to hear it!! a lot of people have been telling me ive been inspiring them to draw lately and i love it (im just sorry i dont have any concrete tips to give people other than keep practicing LOL) but good luck and i hope you keep at it!!🥰🥰

GIRL IDK, IDEK HOW LONG THE STORY IS GONNA BE, but assuming im still brainrotted even when its done then YEAH u wouldnt be able to stop me if you tried😊 (im glad you like them so much as well, ty!!😭)

thank you!! and yes i usually have at least a vague idea of what i want in the story before i start, though a lot of it didn't become concrete until i started writing/things evolving from there. i made a big (slightly) vague timeline of the entire fic from beginning to (almost) end, and then i keep fleshing it out from there as the ideas keep coming to me/evolving, and for each chapter i make an even more detailed outline, and THEN i get started on the final chapter. so its a bit of a process bahaha, but the brainstorming is really fun!! as for any advice, im not sure. maybe just brainstorm/write down scenes and ideas that you know for a fact that you want to put in your fic, and then try to find a way to connect them to other scenes from there and work backwards. basically WRITE WHAT YOU WANT TO READ, cuz like im my own biggest fan fr, thats the most important part LMAO

LMFAO speaking of outlining future events.....this may or may not happen in the future/in an epilogue when clora is pregnant and she got those pregnant woman hormones that seb is fighting for his LIFE to keep up with HAHAHA

ive been drawing since i was 4 years old so...a while. LOL. and if you even look back to the beginning of my blog, my first drawings of seb were SO UGLY💀💀 so if you just keep drawing you constantly get better naturally (also in response to the other ask you sent as well, i use clip studio paint to draw!)

AW TYYY. AND YES CLORA WILL HAVE ANOTHER MC MOMENT, the ranrok confrontation is still coming, after all...👀👀 and true, idek who would win if clora and seb duelled again with neither of them holding back, but u are so right. even if clora DID win that would do nothing to change sebs mind about how protective he is LMFAO. THANK YOU AGAIN im glad you like my fic + drawings so much!!💖💖

BAHAHAH in my fic (for smut reasons and so that they could be 17 when they did the nasty) i made clora's bday april 3rd and sebs february 12, so clora is an aries and seb is an aquarius (and yes i just checked and apparently they ARE compatible, so seb can rest. also i just read up on aquarius and damn it unintentionally suits seb so well?? LOL "Aquarius is undoubtedly the most innovative, progressive, rebellious, and humanitarian. " and "They have incredible energy, though they may not always use it wisely. They find it easy to get through life on charm and good looks." LMFAO. ok king we love that

#ask #THERES STILL SOME I HAVENT REPLIED TO BUT JUST KNOW I APPRECIATE THEM ALL💖💖

[leorawright]

Ok Im very excited Ive been wanting to request again for months but I work the whole day on Fridays :') but im back to request another mashup cause things have changed since the last one!

i would like to request a TF2 mashup (preferably romantic) with any of the main mercs (might exclude pyro unless you want to make it platonic).

Some stuff about me:

Im a hetersexual cis woman who wants to be a freelance artist, either in illustration or in character design! Right now Im studying illustration and its really fun to learn new techniques! I do get insecure from time to time with my art, but Im very determined to learn what I can and just have fun making art

Personality wise, Im very stoic and serious-looking, keeping to myself most of the time, but once i get comfortable I cant stop talking, like sometimes I have to remind myself to tone it down a little heheh

Once I get into something like a tv show or other series, Im very focused on it and think about it non-stop. For example, Ive been into Seinfeld for almost a year now to the point where one afternoon I spent an hour planning what a Seinfeld video game would look like, yknow, because I could. Sometimes I think about not being as involved in my interests as much as I do, but at the same time thats what makes me happy and drives my creativity, yknow?

Ive also been developing some stories of my own! Im no writer myself, but I love creating storylines and developing them further, whether they're original concepts or based on tf2 or something

As for what Im looking for in a partner, I want someone who can make me laugh. I admire someone who can talk so openly to other people but still be gentle and comforting with me even though Im not a very extroverted person. I want someone who admires my creativity and can listen to me when Im saying something, whether its something serious or not. I want someone who can share in some of my interests, and even when he doesnt he can still appreciate my enthusiam and not say something along the lines of "you're still talking about this?", yknow? Whenever I feel at my worst, I want him to just whisper sweet nothings, without having to try to 'fix' my problems immediately, just letting me slowly feel my emotions and junk. Im pretty much rambling on at this point but basically i just need the bare minimum like opening the door for me to fall in love with someone heh

I have a bit more confidence after attending art school, and Im trying to socialize more, but its still a little draining sometimes, but its still worth it in the end I think!

Uhhhhhhhhhh idk what else to put, this is mostly the bare minimum but I hope you're doing well! Take care and have a good day!

I have the perfect person...

Demoman!

He has the strangest sense of humor but whenever he's able to make you laugh, he absolutely lights up

If you're having a bad day, you bet Demo will do everything in his power to comfort you, whether it's listening to you talk or just telling you terrible jokes until you feel better

Or if you're having one of those days where you just need to cry, Demo will lay beside you and whisper about whatever until you fall asleep

Whenever you talk about your interests, he pays as much attention as possible so you know he's interested

Also, he praises your art so much and loves watching you draw, he thinks it's mesmerizing

#matchups #tf2 demoman x reader

[facade]

art vent, kind of makes me look like a shallow person

FOR clarification i'm 20. turning 21 in two months. yippee! what an eye opener

the point of trying to profit your art, especially using your art to help fund for survival since you were 11 - you realize that while you want to improve your art for yourself, you're so consciously aware of what parts would appeal to strangers who see your art.

because you don't want to appeal to others to enjoy your art, you want to appeal to others to garner money and funds. i've ebegged on this site for almost a decade, on so many different accounts and even used my art as much as i could to get even more money. to pay bills, to pay for food, to help my mother in medical emergencies. since i was only 11 years old, by the way. a lot of the time, while it is a huge part of my reason to keep improving -- i don't actually think of reasons such as improving my art because 'i want to go to college' 'i want to be better' as much as my main reason being: i want this to sell to people.

that being said, my art style is something im so happy with right now for myself. but i think like. you have to really make your art your signature. that way, people will want to buy what you can give them. but algorithm is just, so hard to fight with now. the heartbreaking part is that, even if i'm at my 'peak' in art.

and my art has always been my one consistent interest, thats never faded. it's apart of my daily life. my routine, my medicine, my hobby, my enjoyment. i need this to live in many different ways. whether it be for providing my funds via commissions, coping art for trauma, or generally to express my happiness for things in my head, etc. i need this hobby or i will die. its the one skill ive had my entire life thats stuck, and its something i'm *good* at. and i've kept up with it to this day.

my art looks consistently good. flattering. i would say at some points it feels.. professional, sometimes. i am consistently proud and satisfied with my art and haven't struggled on pieces as much as i used to several years ago. it took me 2 months to come up with illustrations. now ive been pumping them out with ease. commissions are so much faster. quicker. ive really upgraded. i'm efficient, quick, and my stylization journey has been amazing.

yet..

this has been the hardest i've ever fucking struggled to make money, ever. since i was 11 years old. i've never.. had so much difficulty. i feel spoiled, honestly, when i know so many other artists struggle filling commissions too. but i've always had good fortune, i guess. good luck. but not since the year began. it's been so hard to fill in requests, so hard to fill slots. even when my prices are cheaper, it's still so hard. which is crazy, because 2 years ago i was consistently filling slots like crazy. i had consistent income, for the most part. i was able to help my family, avoid eviction, pay for water, clothes, food. emergencies like car wrecks, medical stuff -- god, its insane how much my art has helped me. it's scary. to think about what woulld happen if i didnt have this skill.

back then, like my art looked like this in 2021.

i look back and i wonder. this is fine, its definitely my art style. but how did i makee so much money off of stuff like this? so much more than i do now? i still draw fanart, and my art's been getting better. i think its honestly just bad luck, or maybe algorithm has flopped a lot of my stuff. either way, it's sort of humbling. Extremely humbling, that even with all this improvement - it still may not be enough to get me anywhere. i've never struggled before, trying to open commissions even when ive always focused on original content primarily. i know its hard to get popularity when you only draw ocs, but ive been fine for the most part. getting by, until lately.

i think i'll just have to keep working harder. see what people enjoy, but its just really ego crushingi think. And i could care less about popularity or anything. i think the really awful part is that im just stressed all the time about how i can keep making money off of this when its been so hard to even fill slots, let alone gaining peoples interests. Is this competition related? is this just a shit time for artists? am i just flopping. Who knows.. ohwell. ill survive

[thdramas2]

Forgive my language. But GOD im so fucking tired of people not finishing their commissions and still taking on more. Dare i say, complete dumbasses. Its so frustrating to me because ive been waiting for multiple commissions (which i paid upfront for), all over/almost a year old, and i still haven’t received any fucking sketches nor money back. Im normally a very patient and overacommodating person which is what got me to this point where i cannot file a charge back, and i feel fucking dumb for letting myself be scammed.

Hell, i used to even think for a while this was just the case with artists who are minors, but hell no, not even fully grown ass adults reach out to me with any updates. I’m so pissed. One of them literally won’t even respond because “they lost my dm” for several months after i shoot them a message every 2-3 months or so, and i just checked to see them be extra active all day today, yet still not responding to me asking ONCE MORE for any updates a few hours ago. I want my $90 back.

Look, i get that people find themselves in a long queue, but this shit is ridiculous, and i’m sorry to say this but if you struggle to finish art in a timely manner for someone who already paid you then don’t. Fucking. Take. More. People.

I’m literally furious, seeing them all complete so much art through the entire year yet not being able to draw me at least a sketch. I shouldn’t have to wait that long. If i knew it would take that long i would never comm. istfg.

i would say expose those bitches for scamming you

and maybe sell art of your own or characters to get your money back

im so fucking sorry that happened to you non :[

#vent

[agentsquirrelsgotrobots]

More for Little Nightmares x rescue bots!

Of course, Woodrow decided to drop in only a couple of days after Charlie took in Six and Mono.

Of course, he never checked his email.

"Oh, hello there." Woodrow said, to the small, alarmly thin child scribbling in a coloring book with a cardboard box on his head and wearing a trench coat in June.

"Could you tell me where Chief Charles Burns is? He has gray hair, a mustache -"

"Upstairs with Six. Knock first, bites." Mono went back to drawing, ignoring the man. Unlike Six, he didn't immediately jump to biting strangers.

"Okay. Cool. I should check my email. Hey buddy, is it OK if I sit on that couch behind you and check my email?"

"Go sit." Mono said, almost done coloring the puppy with Charlie's badge around its neck.

Woodrow kept an eye on the boy. This wasn't the first kid the Burns had fostered.

They were one of a handful of foster homes on the island, and before Cody was born, they almost always had a foster teen or a placement with high support needs in the firehouse.

Back when there were more firefighters than just Kade, of course.

It was highly unorthodox, but the guarantee of an adult in the house due to the unique dorm style of the house meant that even when emergencies happened, there was always someone off shift that could watch a kid, and the alarm could be customized to skip individual rooms. They would often get cases that had behavior problems or just didn't respond well to a typical family after whatever trauma brought them into the state's "care." (Nearly every single placement came with enough stuff to fit in a shoebox. A child's entire life, and the only thing they had with them was a shoebox's worth of personal belongings, the clothes on their back, and a file folder of legal documents. They left the firehouse, no matter how long they stayed, with two duffel bags and a good school bag. Woodrow packed light, but even then, he still lived out of two storage totes and his car when not traveling. Charlie has most of his mementos stored in his room)

Of course, then Cody was born, and the divorce happened and, of course, the bots, and though all the Burns made sure to keep up their licenses, they have been on emergency placements only for a good fifteen years.

Woodrow finally read through the email marked urgent in his inbox.

Through Griffin Rock weirdness, we have had to foster two severely neglected children, which has led to some changes to how we work at the firehouse.

The oldest, Mono (boy, approx between 7-9) is not to have his mask or coat touched, removed, or commented on.

The youngest, Six, (girl, approx between 5- 7) has severe malnutrition based aggression and should not be bothered or interrupted while eating. Only me and Dani are to be alone with her in any scenario, and Charlie has taken a break from work in order to care for her.

Mono is not allowed to watch TV alone as he has a teleportation ability that allows him to travel between computer screens that he can reasonably fit through. Yes, that's why there is clear duct tape on the TV. It sorta works.

Please knock on all shut doors, Six likes hiding behind them, and Mono likes to sit against them.

No, they don't have any other name except Six and Mono. Yes, we do see the pattern.

"Well, that was interesting." Woodrow remarked.

Woodrow heard the bots drive up the road and wasn't surprised when Heatwave poked his head in.

"Oh. Woodrow, it's just you and Mono."

Mono looked up when he heard his name. He pointed at himself, and Heatwave nodded. "Six get med." Mono said before going back to coloring.

Charlie stepped out with a girl with a raincoat tied around her waist. She was gaunt, her ribs peaking through her t-shirt.

"That's Six?" Woodrow asked. Mono waved to Six, and Six ducked behind Charlie.

"She's all done with her IV treatments. Today's was the last round. She doesn't like new people, and we are working on ways to leave people she doesn't like without biting, so I won't bring her down."

"So, I-C-E-C-R-E-A-M?" Kade asked.

"Yes." Charlie replied. "Mono, come eat. Woodrow, I will transfer some money so you can find somewhere else to stay."

Mono got up and looked back at Woodrow, a squeak slipping from his mouth.

"Mono, we have all the food you could want." Charlie said, clearly expecting a reaction out of him. Mono ran up to Woodrow, grabbed his hand, and pulled him out of the garage before sprinting into the elevator and pressing the button furiously.

"Mono -" Charlie sighed. "I'm sorry, Woodrow. He's just not convinced that there's enough to go around yet, and the kitchen is open to him at all hours. I've put snacks in his room that he hasn't touched, and he will try to share every scrap with Six if we didn't do separate mealtimes, so I know he doesn't just sneak everything onto her plate. I don't blame him, though, for what I've seen, Six does most of the protecting for the both of them."

"Yeah, I don't know either. Open kitchens and safe, hygienic food stashes usually helped hoarding and resource guarding, but Mono's definitely a character. I'll take a hint. It was nice seeing you either way."

"Take care, Woodrow. Can you wave too... Woodrow.... Six?" Charlie realized that he was holding the cuff of an empty raincoat, and had told Mono there's food.

Oh no.

He might have just incited a kitchen riot.

Charlie dashed back into the main apartment, being greeted by Six eating out of a dumped out package of oreos on the counter while Mono had swapped his cardboard box for a cloth mask and was presumably looking for matches for the stove. (He still didn't quite grasp the idea of an electric one)

Charlie was thankful that he had put everything flammable or sharp in a series of multiple locked safes, with an assortment of keypads, locks, and a fingerprint lock. (Mono didn't understand that one either. Six just tried to smash things or climb them. She was smart in a rock climber way, not in logic puzzles and combination locks)

Charlie picked up Six off the counter, brushing the oreos back into the package, taking both thd kid and cookies into Six's room. He set her on the bed with the cookies and her raincoat, throwing her a teddy bear Cody had given her as an attempt to get her to warm up to him for good measure.

Both Mono and Six completely distrusted him, Mono refusing to say anything except "trap!" and his usual clicks, whines, and sentence fragments. That reminds him. Both kids need to get on a waiting list for speech therapy. On second thought, he'd just call Optimus. He could probably get them both in by the end of the month with his contacts.

Soon, Charlie would learn what Mono meant by trap.

But not today.

Today, the kitchen raid is the biggest mess the two of them will bring to Charlie's feet.

He came back to Kade spreading peanut butter on toast and Dani cutting up bananas. Mono was obsessed with fresh fruit and vegetables and ate baby carrots and peas like they were candy. There were multiple times when Charlie took Mono grocery shopping or just outside to be around people when he would stop and stare at a case of water or a crate of apples or hot dog cart with a look of awe, like he had never seen a stocked store or full shelf just one product before.

Charlie had to remind himself that day th that he didn't know how long Mono and Six and the gnome had been on their own and probably never will.

Speaking of the gnome, it adored Cody and would shriek and run in a random direction if it saw Six.

When asked what Six did to the gnome, Six mimed ripping into something and then threw her toys off the bed.

Charlie assumed she probably ate one at some point.

Cody clutched the gnome a little tighter after it ran into his room that day and hid in its box, a broken birdhouse that he hot glued some old art projects to create a makeshift hutch. The snake tank Dani used to keep multiple generations of gerbils in (one at a time, of course) nearly gave it a heart attack.

Charlie came back to Mono eating from his bag of baby carrots with his cardboard box on and watching Kade mess around with the TV he had teleported through.

Mono had figured out how to plug it in, and had crawled through it when no one was looking, leading to him popping out of the downstairs TV while Blades was sitting in front of it on a video call with Bumblebee

They would never hear the end of it, and that was when the Autobots officially got involved in trying to track down where Mono and Six came from. (And the gnome, of course.)

#transformers rescue bots #little nightmares #rescue bots #maccadam

[21ate]

i got my new tablet and so far its pretty nice! here, i drew up some stuff for my sonic forces au hehe. someday id like to produce a legit comic for it, so if youd like to know more, ive put some context under the read more :)

i also have a separate blog just for sonic stuff which will be where i post the rest of my au art, so check out @mobianstrip as well!

SONIC FORCES AU (official title still pending)

okay, i think its fair to say that sega did a poor job writing a war story with any kind of point and the confusing tone is frustrating, so my au takes the dark themes present in the game and actually follows through on expanding upon them.

it always bothered me that sonic just lets eggman go even though he almost took over the planet in a literal war he started, displacing and killing (er, roboticizing?) thousands, if not millions of mobians. i dont care that infinite was the stronger threat - eggman is still responsible for finding the phantom ruby and teaming up with infinite to begin with. why would anyone allow eggman to get away with something on this scale of destruction???

obviously sega has to keep their games formulaic and they cant just kill eggman or something, but this is the one storyline where allowing him to get away doesnt work in my opinion. the unusually high stakes implied/explicitly stated versus the practically nonexistent consequences leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

this au takes a more realistic approach to the aftermath of the war. eggman has been captured by the resistance and imprisoned indefinitely and sonic, for whatever his reasons may be, doesnt believe eggman should be imprisoned. he advocates for his release and this causes massive backlash across mobius. soon enough, tensions rise so high that a riot breaks out in front of his home.

you could argue that this may not justify burning his house down, but sonic is not supposed to be in the right here either and his comment about peaceful protests is intentionally a pretty bad, tone deaf take. im sick of sonic's characterization as a perfect hero who is always in the right and always happy, so i decided that this would turn into a negative trait in the context of a war story.

so, being really into the superhero deconstruction genre lately, thats sort of the tone im aiming for here as well.

i dont want to give too much of the story away though, so youll just have to wait until i write and draw so more (or check out my sonic blog, though i consider the designs to be a bit outdated. also, it will no longer be called 25 years later! take the old stuff with a grain of salt, ive got lots of new ideas now hehe)

<3

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic forces #shadow the hedgehog #sth #my art

[magnoliamyrrh]

and another thing that chronic pain brings that i find is less talked about and that people without chronic pain can't wrap their head around, is the emotional pain and just straight up despair of feeling like your body is useless, knowing you'll never be able to do the things you want to that "normal" people can do.

^^^^^ Exactly

especially when it hits you when youre young. even if and when you manage to get used to the pain itself (tho even "getting used to it" takes a prepetual toll) theres still always that part of it too. of feeling trapped in a body that seems so weak and fragile, and there being things you want to do that you used to be able to at some point, or dreamed of being able to do that you just.... have to accept you either cant, or that if you do them theyre going to make you exponentially worse....... it feels like being forced to miss out on so many things, and its so damn hard and mentally draining and scary and,,,,yea,, a lot of dispair hits you. its hard to accept

i always lose it when i realize how much i can't rly do anymore. even when i had chronic pain some years back and my joints were going to shit, id still push myself and walk for hours upon hours almost every day, it was relaxing and one of my favourite things to do.... now there are many times when walking for 30-40 minutes a day or several times a week feels like it absolutely cripples me. such seeminly low effort things take it out of me for days on end.... i cant play guitar anymore because my hands cant handle it. when my pain was worse, thank god its better now, i couldn't draw anymore... theres so many hobbies i wanted to try, but cant because some part of my body wouldnt handle it. many times ive been too dizzy or exhausted to cook, despite it being one of my favourite things to do.... i had an entire weeks-long mental breakdown and spiraled horribly when i realized i couldnt really ski anymore, despite being very, very good at it. id rather die than think i could never ride horses again, but i know there is a high chance doing so will ruin my hips...... the list is fucking endless

it feels like some sort of nightmare you just cant seem to wake up from. past a point damned be the pain, but realizing your body just cant handle or do shit or doesnt have the strengh, or that the pain is just too sharp, its just... fucking horrible.... it almost breaks you more than the pain itself past a point. and idk personally its been a nightmare for me to see how fast a lot of my health issues have progressed. i was certain i wouldnt be as bad as i am now until i was in my 30s.... but in just a few years, its gotten so much fucking worse

..... its one of those things that i guess you cant do nothing about but accept...? and try to make the best out of??? because getting endlessly upset about it doesnt help, and being upset only feeds the chronic pain. but its very hard, especially when daily things in your life constantly remind you. i still havent been able to figure out some sort of way or mindset to do that at all

i assume from this ask you also struggle with this? im very sorry ❤️🧡❤️ it truly is a lot to handle to say the least. thank u for this ask tho, helps to feel less alone, and if u ever need to vent to someone who gets it ur more than welcome to 🌸 i hope this week will be easier on you and that youll feel a little bit better, and i hope with time you'll maybe be able to find some things which make it easier to bare. god knows what the chances are, but maybe with all the science nowadays well both have the insane luck for some cure or actual treatment, as far fetched as that seems at times

#also pls tell me if u want this deleted i didnt know if to publish it or not