#ive been on a one shot writing streak lol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

scottspack · 4 years

Text

SO YOU JUST FINISHED THE UNTAMED AND YOU WANT TO READ SOME FIC

Congratulations Jen @jlf23tumble on finishing The Untamed (tomorrow)! Now that you’re done with the show (tomorrow), you can finally dive into the wide and wonderful world of untamed fic!!! I’m ecstatic to be personally curating your reading experience! LET’S BEGIN!

I’ve started off with a list of 5 fics I think you should read in this specific order to 1. get some resolution from the end of the show and 2. get you acclimated to untamed fics! Then, I’ve listed a bunch of fics in different categories for your perusal to read at your leisure! This is an unbelievably long post holy shit brace yourself.

I’m like fairly certain that all of these follow the tv show canon BUT also its very typical for authors to combine many aspects of all of the different forms of canons to their liking. Therefore, I feel like I need to give a quick explanation of a couple things from the novel that show up frequently in fics that idk if you know already or not:

In the book, when Wei Wuxian is resurrected, he is brought back in Mo Xuanyu’s actual body and has his face and everything. Mo Xuanyu was pretty young when he died, I wanna say maybe 17 or 18??? and he was also short and pretty and flamboyantly gay. This is where the references to their crazy height difference come from, but again, I think I tried to include mostly fics that skew more heavily to the tv version where WWX keeps his same body and he and LWJ are more evenly matched physically.

Its novel canon that LWJ smells like sandalwood incense and has golden colored eyes. This is mentioned in like almost every single wangxian fic ive ever read, even if the author said they were strictly adhering to show canon lol

At the end of the novel wangxian run away together and elope! Obviously in the show that’s not how it goes down, but I think a couple of the fics I’ve recced might mention it in passing. (Oh also when they elope they make a pact to fuck “everyday,” a concept that might be mentioned as well.

Obviously, we have to kick it off with some fics that both reunite wangxian and give more resolution to the actual show. If you’re like me, it both took you a while to get all the way through the show AND took 100% of your brain power to remember all of the characters and plot lines. If that’s that case: these fics should be helpful in serving as a kind of emotional refresher for the show to wrap up some loose ends and to dive deeper into some of the things the show glosses over for one reason or another!

1. A Lot of Edges Called Perhaps by hansbekhart (Wangxian, E, 21k)

The funny part is - and it is a little funny, even if Wei Wuxian has no one left to share the joke with - they never have. Not anything. He has never kissed any part of Lan Zhan besides his slim hands; never been even partially undressed with him anywhere besides a miserable, xuanwu-infested cave. It’s always been like this between them, this simmering need, this desperate understanding: a knowledge so deep that it lives somewhere in his bones, that if he wanted to have Lan Zhan he could have him, and if Lan Zhan wanted Wei Wuxian he could have that too. But they never have.

I found this fic on someone’s blog when they said that it was the definitive fic to read directly after finishing the series so i saved it, read it directly after finishing the series, and felt COMPLETE. Beautifully written, seamlessly fits with canon, and has a super fulfilling resolution. The perfect way to kick off reading untamed fic!

2. One Rogue Spark In My Direction by hansbekhart (Lan Wangji/Xiao Xingchen/Song Lan, E, 5k)

He’d thought, in Yueyang, that they’d seen something in each other, something familiar. That maybe they’d recognized something in him. But it’s been many years, and many things have happened since, and he’s guessed wrongly at other people’s hearts before. Lan Wangji looks back down at the table, at his steaming, bitter tea. He’ll beg if he has to.

In “A Lot Of Edges Called Perhaps” Wangji mentions that he has had sex before and this is the in-universe story of that time and WHEW BABY!!!! AHHHHHH!!! While this fic is like, almost pure smut, I think there is a ton of value to it in terms of emotional perspective on how fucked up LWJ was after WWX’s death. Also, it’s very hot.

3. Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses by hansbekhart (Laz Sizhui & Lan Wangji, G, 19k)

Later, when he’s older, it’s this that A-Yuan will remember most: the stretch of silence, the two of them both dirty and shaking with fever, as he looked at Brother Rich, and Brother Rich looked back at him.

This is a fic about Lan Wangji raising Sizhui from when he rescues Sizhui from the Burial Mounds until they bring WWX back to the Cloud Recesses after he’s resurrected. It made me cry about 18 times and I consider it fully canon in relation to the show. I think this gives a lot of emotional depth to the Wangji/Sizhui family relationship that is very important in most fics, so this acts as a good base since the show doesn’t really talk about it too much.

4. Your Name, Safe In Their Mouth by astrolesbian (Lan Sizhui & Wei Wuxian, G, 10k)

“You’ve got a fever,” Wei Wuxian says soothingly. “You just keep still as well as you can. We’ll have you fixed up soon.”

Lan Sizhui recognizes his tone—this is the voice that Wei Wuxian uses on hurt people and young children, a very calm and no-nonsense voice that has none of the mischief and cheer of the way he sounds the rest of the time. Lan Sizhui looks up and meets his eyes, and they are dark, stormy gray, muddled and concerned.

“I’m all right,” he croaks.

“Hush,” Wei Wuxian says, in a low croon, like someone quieting a baby. Then he blinks, and looks away, awkward. “I mean—you shouldn’t speak. You’re tired. Rest if you need to.”

or: lan sizhui gets sick on a night hunt. wei wuxian comforts him. they both have a lot of feelings about it.

The Wei Wuxian and Sizhui bonding fic that I so desperately desperately needed to read. Since we got the emotional depth to Wangji/Sizhui in the last fic, here’s some emotional resolution for Sizhui and his other dad!!!!!!!!!! Scratched the very particular itch of “but have they REALLY talked about what it means that they’re reunited after 16 years???”

5. climbing up that coastal shelf by Sour_Idealist (Jin Ling, Jiang Cheng, & Wei Wuxian, T, 15k)

Jin Ling had begun to suspect years ago that there were parts of his family history that had been crossed out; long streaks of black where Wei Wuxian had been. The truth is more like whole books being brought up from their hiding places again.

Or: Jin Ling tries to figure out what family means, now.

OKAY!!!! Last emotional resolution before I send you on your way to explore! This is the emotional resolution for the other half of WWX’s family. Featuring just a FUCK TON of family feels and a lot of TALKING that this fucked up family needs so damn bad. *chefs kiss* muy delicioso! ALSO i think this is a good introduction to a lot of the naming conventions that are used frequently in untamed fic that took me a while to pick up on!

WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now that you’ve gotten some post-show catharsis in the form of a few extremely well-written fics, it’s time for a full rec! I’ve divided it up into seven categories: long fics, smutty one-shots, 3zun (lan xichen/nie mingjue/meng yao) fics, fics about the juniors, family fun fics, some miscellaneous fics, and then some yizhan RPF! I wouldn’t have put any of these fics on here if I didn’t think they were worth reading, BUT! I did mark my particular favorites with asterisks to demark the crème de la crème of the bunch. SO! LET’S DIVE IN!

EPIC TALES (LONG AND/OR IMMERSIVE)

My Age Has Never Made Me Wise by idrilka (Wangxian, E, 63k) ***

“We hear that His Excellency might be married by summer’s end,” the merchant’s wife says and Wei Wuxian freezes, his heart in his throat. “The Gusu Lan sect has been buying enough red silk and brocade that the merchants in Caiyi can’t satisfy the demand.”

He feels himself grow brittle inside, like a flick of a finger to his temple might make him shatter. His ears are ringing.

“Who’s the lucky bride?” he asks despite himself. His tongue sticks to the roof of his mouth.

Or: The story of a marriage.

I LOVE THIS FIC. YOU MUST PROMISE ME YOU’LL READ THIS FIC. The absolute best kind of slow burn and I think such an extremely accurate representation of the canon material. I’m always surprised by the authors in this fandom’s ability to write shit that is so concretely grounded in the universe. This could and should be a real companion novel. Amazing. I love it. (Also I know you said you’re not into fics that are long just to be long and I think this fic is the exact opposite of that, it’s long but for good reason and has such an insanely satisfying payoff that it’s completely worth dedicating a few hours to!)

The Year of Drought by idrilka (Wangxian, E, 24k)

Wei Ying could not be contained by the walls of the Cloud Recesses, alive again and overflowing with it, bursting like a dam in spring with the force of two lives unspent. And so he had to go. Lan Wangji understands that—he understood it when Wei Ying told him of his plans, looking at Lan Wangji above the rim of his cup with an apologetic smile, like craving freedom was something to apologize for.

Wei Ying would go, and Lan Wangji would see him off; this has always been the only way it could be.

Or: In the absence of Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji waits.

The previous fic but from Wangji’s perspective. Absolutely required reading if you read the other one. Wangji baby.......i love you.....

further than the grave by idrilka (Wangxian, E, 32k)

There is something about grief that turns Lan Wangji numb. He cannot be certain if it is not some kind of defect inside him that makes him so. But just as he grieved his mother’s passing with dry eyes and a stone in his chest, so he grieves Wei Ying: quietly, frozen inside, without tears. Beyond the Jingshi window it might be spring, but Lan Wangji’s body and mind are still held within the winter’s grasp.

As the anniversary of his leaving seclusion approaches, Lan Wangji ponders the nature of grief and healing.

One last fic from the same verse as the previous two, this talks about Wangji post-WWX’s death and then them dealing with the past post-marriage. Its just as good and immersive and amazing as the previous two parts, but this is the only untamed fic that actually made me gasp out loud and if you read this and can guess what it was we will be best friends forever. (There are two other fics in this verse that are also good but these three in particular are god-tier in my eyes.)

Vagabond by xantissa (Wangxian, E, 66k)

Wei Wuxian comes back to Cloud Recesses after a year of wandering the world, hoping to start a relationship with Lan Zhan. He doesn’t expect to come into the middle of a case of sleeping sickness mysteriously killing people, nor does he expect what follows, putting everything he holds dear on the line once again.

OOOWEE CASE FIC! CASE FIC! This is truly the twisty turny intense and INTERESTING type of fic from this fandom that blows my mind. This could fully be a stand alone novel its that good and there’s that much to it. Another one that isn’t long just to be long, it has so much PLOT!!!!! REAL GOOD SHIT!

Seldom All They Seem by Fahye (Wangxian, E, 25k)

or, one hundred and thirty-three principles of the Gusu Lan, pertaining to the state of marriage

***

He bows to Wei Wuxian, sword in hand, sleeves falling properly. Wei Wuxian bows in return, and the sect leaders begin the opening courtesies, and for all of ten minutes Lan Wangji is under the impression that he is betrothed to a boy who is perfectly normal and acceptable apart from an unfortunate tendency to fidget with his clothes.

That impression does not last.

A canon-divergent fic exploring “what if Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian were betrothed from when they were young like Yanli and Jin Zixuan?” It’s extremely good and very compelling and also made me cry multiple times. (The confrontation in the rain doesn’t get any easier even if they’re betrothed!)

Half Cloak & Half Dagger by Fahye (Lan Xichen/Meng Yao, E, 13k)

Jin Guangyao lifts his head and smiles. "I'm considering a problem."

"Can I be of any assistance with it?"

He drops a kiss on Lan Xichen's chest. With the nail of one finger he lightly traces the characters for irony on Lan Xichen's side. "Not this one, er-ge."

A follow-up fic set in the “Seldom All They Seem” universe but focused on xiyao. Has hands down the best written characterization of meng yao in any fic ive read so far. I continuously come back to this fic just to read the absolutely genius way this author writes the Head Bitch In Control of the cultivation world.

The Absolutely True Story of the Yiling Patriarch: A Manifesto in Many Parts by aubreyli (Wangxian, T, 20k)

Wei Wuxian’s hand jolts, spilling a drop of wine onto the tabletop. “Love?” he croaks, then clears his throat and tries again. “Lan Zh— uh, Hanguang-jun, in love?”

“Have you not heard the story?” the other young woman asks, looking pitying. “You must, it is a truly heartrending tale of star-crossed romance and mutual pining — go to any storyhouse in town, everyone has been requesting a reading of this book.”

“There’s a book?” Wei Wuxian says blankly.

In which the junior disciples (namely, Lan Jingyi, Ouyang Zizhen, and a reluctant Lan Sizhui) turn to RPF in an attempt to rehabilitate Wei Wuxian's reputation so that he and Hanguang-jun can get together and get married and live happily ever after. It's... surprisingly effective.

I kept avoiding this fic, even though it was really high up on the list of most popular fics in the fandom, bc the premise sounded pretty goofy BUT I finally bit the bullet one day and AHHHHHHHH!!!!! Very very very cute and fun, made me smile like an idiot throughout the entire thing. Heartwarming and very well written!!!

never let me go by yiqie (Wangxian, E, 69k)

Wei Wuxian has certainly hoped so ardently in his two lifetimes, for so many different things, in so many different ways, that he could have summoned the demon to his front door with his bare hands. His eyes wander to Lan Zhan, settle on the back of his head, the blue-black curtain of his hair. Oh, how he has hoped.

Another extremely good and super immersive case fic. If you ever just want to sink really deep into an untamed fic, this is a great one for it.

hunters seeking solid ground by Attila (Wangxian, E, 24k)

“Hanguang-jun,” Wei Wuxian repeats. His heart clenches. He wants—but he’d really meant to have this nightmare stuff down before they met again, so he wouldn’t find himself relying on Lan Wangji’s nearness. He’s not supposed to go back yet. But he’s so tired, and his will crumbles. “Yeah,” he says. “All right. Take me back to Gusu with you.”

You want hurt/comfort? I gotcha hurt/comfort RIGHT HERE!

shadows in the sun rise by Yuu_chi (Wangxian, E, 25k) ***

“Wei Ying,” Lan Wangji says, voice slow and a pitch too quiet. A second later Wei Wuxian understands why. “I cannot hear.”

Or; Lan Wangji is cursed into internal isolation. Their ability to understand one another remains as unwavering as ever.

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD. I have been thinking about this fic nonstop since I read it. It is…..fucking incredible. One of the best qualities of wangxian is that they’re so in tune with each other and able to work so cohesively with little communication and this fic is like “what if we take that and DIAL IT UP TO ELEVEN” and i was like AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

I hope that you will come and meet me by feyburner (Wangxian, M, 28k) ***

The second time Lan Zhan said Wei Ying, come back, Wei Wuxian did.

okay so this is literally getting added to the fic rec one day before i send it to you because i just finished it and WHEW BABY!!!!! YES it is just another wangxian post-canon reunion get-together fic, BUT 1. i cant get enough of that specific brand of fic and 2. ITS SO GOOD. ITS. SO. GOOD. achingly tender and incredibly soft but also funny and sweet and very in-character! i love it!

THE BONE ZONE (WANGXIAN SMUT)

Sweet Night by corteae (Wangxian, E, 10k)

It was like coming back to life again, like being restitched into existence, cell by cell, nerve by nerve. From the surface of his skin to the marrow of his bones, everything new and purposeful. Like being pulled back from oblivion into an embrace of pure light. A feeling of absolute asylum.

That’s what it felt like, to realize Lan Wangji was in love with him.

An in-show au of “what if they just admitted they’re in love and fucked during episode 43?” Soft and romantic and hot!

the crucial point by dissembler (Wangxian, E, 7k) ***

Months after parting on the mountain, Lan Wangji makes up his mind, plots his course on a map, and has faith.

I LOVE THIS FIC! Very realistic and sweet wangxian reunion fic from wangji’s perspective. Has so many good little details and is very true to their characters. Good shit. Great.

Stainless by Fahye (Wangxian, E, 6k)

"I'm starting to feel," says Lan Xichen, "that this was a counterproductive suggestion."

Wei Wuxian looks down onto the pristine, tranquil cold springs of the Cloud Recesses. Sitting in the water, their bare shoulders rising like dumplings carefully spaced in a steaming-basket, are a large number of Lan disciples.

"They seem to be doing better," he says, encouragingly. "If they--oh, no, I see what you mean."

At the near bank, someone has pressed someone else against the rocks and is kissing them frantically.

What is getting into a new pairing if not an excuse to read sex pollen in new and exciting ways!

To Recklessly Confess by la_dissonance (Wangxian, E, 8k)

Lan Wangji has a fantasy. Wei Wuxian gets several clues.

The “what if they just fucked in episode 43” au but from a different angle.

all the depths of me, real by northofallmusic (Wangxian, E, 15k)

Wei Wuxian is dealing with a curse a little worse than he'd like to let on, and Lan Zhan is a little less than willing to let it slide.

Another “what if they just fucked in the show” fic, this time set when WWX has the curse on his leg and Wangji has to carry him back to the inn.

Every Day, Learning More by phnelt (Wangxian, E, 6k)

The pink was high on Wei Wuxian’s cheeks. “I mean I haven’t been able to… that I can’t. Not without you.”

Lan Wangji stared. “In this body, the whole time you’ve had it -- you’ve never…”

Wei Wuxian kicked his heels into Lan Wangji’s back. “I just said that!”

I knew at least one of these was more book verse than show! WWX hasn’t been able to jerk off in his new body, LWJ helps him out :-)

the meaning of the ritual by newamsterdam (Wangxian, E, 8k)

“Lan Zhan… wants to bed me?”

The hand on his chest is shaking, slightly. “Mn.”

“Oh,” Wei Wuxian breaths out.

There’s something— something powerful, about that. Lan Wangji wants to bed him. Lan Wangji wants to sleep with him. Lan Wangji wants to touch him, and kiss him. The immovable, implacable Second Master of Lan, with a face and principles both carved from jade, wants him.

“Is this a fantasy of yours?” Wei Wuxian asks. “Forcing all the demonic energy out of me with your—”

Lan Wangji claps a hand over his mouth. “Silence, now.”

When the entire cultivation world turns against the Yiling Patriarch, Wei Wuxian makes a risky gamble— he'll agree to participate in an ancient ritual for cleansing the spirit, so that his character can no longer be called into question. The catch? He has no idea who his partner for the ritual will be.

This is also book-verse! As the tag says “Let Lan Wangji Fuck the Yiling Patriarch”!!!!!!!!!!!

Hurricane by gdgdbaby (Wangxian, E, 6k) ***

"Haven't you heard?" Nie Huaisang replied, clicking his tongue, though he was clearly pleased that he could be the one to break the news. He leaned in to announce with a dramatic flourish: "Lan Wangji just took emergency family leave this past weekend."

WANGXIAN AS SPIRK STAR TREK PON FAR AU!!!!!!!!!!!!! WEEWOO WEEWOO WEEWOO!!!!!!!! This was actually recced to ME by CHI and I have not stopped thinking about this fic for a full month. It’s like author gdgdbaby sat down one day and was like “Tumblr user Liv Scottspack deserves everything she wants in this life.” and then wrote this fic. Thank you author gdgdbaby, I love you.

WORLD’S WORST THROUPLE (3ZUN)

The body is a blade by rheawrites (3zun, E, 2k) ***

In which Lan Xichen is taken by surprise, Nie Mingjue takes what he can get, and Meng Yao gets what he wants.

This was the first 3zun fic I ever read and whew baby, got it in one! It’s actually a slight AU but it gets their characterization so right and is a very fun read. One of those fics I go back to frequently because it does so much with so few words.

shang tiantang by fuckwarlock (3zun, E, 4k)

They wanted so much, and with the way A-Yao gasps at the saber-calloused hand unfastening his belts, he does, too. The night air twirls with the scents of osmanthus and cinnamon and melon. Lan Xichen smiles, leans in, and ghosts his lips over the crook of A-Yao’s neck. What kind of brother would he be if he didn’t give A-Yao what he wanted? “I think it’s your turn to ascend, A-Yao.”

The Venerated Triad celebrates the Mid-Autumn Festival the best way they know how.

Truly the only way the venerated triad works is if meng yao gets Destroyed :-)

Favour and Fate by soulgusttheguardian (3zun, E, 8k)

There have been times in Meng Yao’s life when he couldn’t help but wonder how he came to be in his current situation. Found himself reflecting on the choices leading up to whatever misfortune had befallen him that day, and pondering why fate hated him so.

Granted, there had also been times when he couldn't help but wonder just what he had done to earn the favour necessary to be rewarded with certain things...

The current situation he found himself to be in, however, was definitely the latter.

More of the same! Truly I personally can never get enough of the 3zun dynamic in smut fics its just too goddamn motherfucking GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!

the stars do not take sides by everyearning (3zun, E, 4k)

Mingjue isn’t sure he’s ever seen Xichen do anything other than treat the boy like a porcelain doll and it’s laughable to him, to think of Meng Yao as something breakable, instead of the sharp, deadly object he is.

Okay one last “Destroy Meng Yao” 3zun fic! Enjoy!

never as alive as we are right now by ThirtySixSaveFiles (3zun, E, 12k)

Three perspectives on three sworn brothers, at three different times in their relationship.

(Or, three times 3zun got it on and some of the feelings they had along the way.)

Wait actually I want to end the 3zun fics on this one because it has true Emotional Resolution at the end and I think they deserve a little healing.

BABY BOYS. BABIES. (THE JUNIORS)

A Civil Combpaign by Ariaste (Jin Ling/Lan Sizhui, T, 20k) ***

“And,” said one of the pompous ministers, “there’s the matter of a marriage to consider as well!”

Jin Ling, who at the beginning of that sentence had expected to slam into the very last wall of his patience and lose his temper entirely, paused. “A what?”

Thing was… it wasn’t such a bad idea.

A MUST-FUCKING-READ!!! Jin Ling gets it in his head that as sect leader he should get married and sets his sights on Lan Sizhui. I cannot stress enough how FUCKING CUTE this fic is!!! Sizhui being the best boy! Jin Ling having more uncles than he knows what to do with! Jiang Cheng being the worst at relationship advice! It’s so fucking good it love it so much.

Anyway, Here’s Wuji by kakikaeru (Lan Jingyi/Lan Sizhui, T, 18k)

The melody gets a little clearer when he breaks out of the trees, and Jingyi changes course with certainty, barreling down the back hill and through the Cloud Recesses, dodging scandalized disciples left and right. He throws open the doors to the Receiving Hall without announcement and bows nearly double, eyes on the floor instead of on the shocked faces of the Mei delegation and the impenetrable gaze of the Chief Cultivator.

"Forgive this disciple," Jingyi shouts, because he's going to get punished for rule breaking regardless. "From the back hill, Hanguang-jun, there is a song in the wind!"

Lan Jingyi comes of age.

A Jingyi-central fic about Jingyi growing up and falling in love and being a hero and being the second best boy of my heart right after Sizhui. Not only is this fic sweet and romantic but it’s another one that explores a lot of interesting things within canon and all of the supporting characters are written very well and are just as interesting as second best boy Jingyi.

Ok, JiuJiu by kakikaeru (Jin Ling/Ouyang Zizhen, T, 16k)

Uncle's jaw works in the way that suggests he's about to say something irredeemable. Jin Ling, in a move of diplomacy he hopes the Chief Cultivator appreciates, distracts him with spicy food and his favourite subject: the incompetence of his own officials.

"I hear the lakes in the south east are having drainage problems?" he asks nonchalantly, sticking three big slices of braised pork belly into his Uncle's bowl.

Jin Ling just wants to get through the Discussion Conference with his Sect, his dignity, and his heart intact.

A follow up fic to “Anyways, Here’s Wuji.” I LOVE the Jin Ling/Ouyang Zizhen dynamic of Jin Ling having been raised by Jiang “I keep all my emotions right here and then one day I’ll die” Cheng AND being hopelessly charmed and smitten with Ouyang “President of the I Love Love Romance Novel Book Club” Zizhen! I LOVE IT! EXTREMELY CUTE!

Lan Sizhui's Guide to Courtship by Kimblydot (Lan Sizhui/Lan Jingyi, T, 23k)

In which Jingyi is a little oblivious, Sizhui is patient (and should have said something in the beginning), and everyone else is resigned to watching them dance around each other for far longer than necessary.

(Or: five things Sizhui tries to do in his courtship, and the one time Jingyi realizes there was one happening in the first place.)

I’ll stop describing fics about the juniors as being “cute” when they stop being SO FUCKING CUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

His Merit All My Fear by violettressed (Lan Sizhui/Lan Jingyi, G, 16k)

It’s too late for any of Hanguang-Jun’s rabbits to be awake -- one of the sundown chores for young disciples is to herd them back into their hutch -- but the rabbit field is as good a spot as any for quality sulking, so Lan Jingyi makes his way there.

Someone has beat him to it.

Lan Jingyi stares at Hanguang-Jun. Hanguang-Jun stares passively back.

When Lan Sizhui is swept away with the Ghost General, off on a new adventure, Lan Jingyi is the one who returns to Cloud Recesses alone.

Not only another extremely cute Sizhui/Jingyi fic BUT one that includes a Wangji/Jingyi friendship??? Incroyable! *chefs kiss*

spirit running wild by idrilka (Lan Sizhui/Lan Jingyi, E, 17k)

He doesn’t know, exactly, when the friendship he shared with Sizhui over the years has changed into something that’s made Jingyi finally understand why Hanguang-Jun always wears that expression whenever he looks at Senior Wei. There hasn’t been one single moment that he can point to and say, yes, this is where it started, because the thing about falling in love with your best friend is that it happens gradually, until it’s impossible to tell which step has been the deciding one.

Jingyi goes to Baling with a crush.

Written by the same genius that wrote the first three fics I made you read so you know it’s good. Its truly the childhood best friends to lovers of it all! Sizhui is adorable and Jingyi is a mess! *muah!*

FAMILY FUN TIME (NO ROMANCE, JUST FEELS)

Grow by cafecliche (Lan Sizhui & Wei Wuxian, T, 14k)

“Okay,” Jingyi says, as Sizhui puzzles this out aloud. “Okay! So the demon has been turning its victims into children.”

“I think so,” Sizhui says.

“To make them easier prey,” Jingyi says.

“Yes,” Sizhui says.

“So—” Jingyi’s voice cracks here, “this kid is Senior Wei.”

Wei Wuxian, still tangled in his own massive robes, blinks politely at them.

(Or: Wei Wuxian is cursed on a night-hunt, and the junior quartet rapidly finds themselves in over their heads.)

What I expected to be a goofy, silly fic turned out to be extremely emotional and made me FULLY CRY! It’s a very moving fic about Sizhui coming to understand himself and Wei Wuxian a lot better AND features all of the juniors arguing over who’s turn it is to hold 6 year old Wei Wuxian. A true win/win of a fic.

To The Act of Making Noise by words-writ-in-starlight (Lan Sizhui & Lan Wangji, G, 19k)

His father in white plays the song late into the night, and when A-Yuan wakes up confused and afraid, the guqin lulls him back to sleep.

Lan Sizhui hears his father play the same song every night for his whole life, and never, ever get an answer.

Another very moving and heartwarming fic about Lan Wangji raising Sizhui and Sizhui figuring out Wangji’s past and then eventually reconnecting with Wei Wuxian. It’s cute and soft and Sizhui is my best boy!

History (Proud To Call Your Own) by words-writ-in-starlight (Wen Ning, G, 5k)

“A-Yuan? Um—Lan-gongzi,” Wen Ning corrects, trying to set a good example. The children are young, seven and eight, exactly a dozen of them lined up in two crisp lines of tiny blue and white robes. Wen Ning can feel them staring at him, even though most of them have already mastered that Lan trick of neutrality. The smallest, a little girl with liquid dark eyes, is clinging to her nearest shijie’s sleeve and half-hiding. “Can I—what can I do for you?”

Wen Ning gets himself recruited for services, while he and Sizhui are visiting Cloud Recesses. Wei Wuxian gets a fan club.

Set in the same universe as “To The Act of Making Noise,” a very cute fic about Wen Ning finding his place in the post-canon world and being proud of Sizhui and being the world’s best substitute teacher. As the official Wen Ning Fan Club President, I had to include this.

the stone-filled sea by yukla (Lan Sizhui & Wei Wuxian, T, 9k) ***

He forgets how quickly Wei-qianbei changes faces, sometimes. Like pulling a theater mask over a bruise—color over color, a diversion with the swipe of his hand.

Lan Sizhui navigates a world that hates his father, one endless wave at a time.

Oh man oh man. I will never get enough of the fics where Sizhui (and the rest of the juniors) get ANGRY on Wei Wuxian’s behalf!! That’s their dad and their teacher and their friend and they will DEFEND HIM!!! YEAH BAYBEEEEEEEEEE!!!

PICK & MIX (MISCELLANEOUS)

This Side of Paradise by greenfionn (Wei Wuxian/Wen Qing, E, 3k)

Wei Wuxian does some very quick math in his head that goes something like this: He is pretty sure he’s in love with Lan Zhan - Lan Zhan is not here and likely never will be here - Wen Qing is here, not to mention very hot and let us not forget, actually interested in sex with him - there’s a solid chance he goes genuinely crazy or dies, or both, in the next few months and really, who wants to die a virgin?

Listen.......the fic premise is “Wei Wuxian and Wen Qing, noted bisexuals, figure life sucks enough at the Burial Mounds, they might as well have any fun they can before they die” and........I Am Looking Directly At It. It features Wen Qing bossing Wei Wuxian around and Wei Wuxian’s canon he-wants-to-be-pregnant kink. It’s........I liked it.

palm to palm is holy palmers’ kiss by iodhadh (Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen, M, 15k) ***

The realization strikes Song Lan like a bolt of lightning: Xiao Xingchen laughs, and he wants with a sudden, stunning desperation to kiss the mirth from his beautiful mouth. How, precisely, he is meant to manage that—that, he has no idea at all.

Or: introspective meditations on touch, trust, and the problem of desire.

I Am Baby and for some reason cannot handle how sad the entire Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen storyline ended up so I rarely read songchen fics, and when I do they’re always soft pre-canon fics like this one. Luckily there are some very beautiful and moving pre-canon songchen fics!!! I love you fandom!!

purpose and ritual by iodhadh (Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen, E, 8k)

Song Zichen has beautiful hands. He's a powerful swordsman, strong and skilled, unfairly impressive and unreasonably handsome. He is devoted and self-disciplined and he takes direction like a dream. And he doesn't touch people—no one at all, if he can help it, except for Xiao Xingchen.

The poets might call him a saint, but Xiao Xingchen is so very, very human.

More of the same :-)

born to sweet delight by la_dissonance (Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen, E, 10k)

Xiao Xingchen lightly jumps into the center of the pool, the water a shock that cools his sticky, heated skin, and does nothing for the heat building inside him. When he surfaces, pushing the hair out of his face, he finds Song Lan's gaze and meets it. Between them, everything goes both ways. What Song Lan will offer, Xiao Xingchen will freely give too.

Or, Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan meet, pledge their lives to each other, and then fall in love.

This is about the angstiest I will go for songchen and its still absolutely Baby Soft lmfao!!!!!!

Pin it down by rheawrites (Jiang Yanli/Jin Zixuan, Jin Zixuan/Nie Mingjue, E, 2k)

“Yanli, I did not lie on our wedding night. You are the only woman I have gone to bed with. But… there was a man.”

“Oh?” Yanli blinks up at him. She does not appear horrified, or betrayed, which is surely a good sign.

Jin Zixuan swallows. “It was Sect Leader Nie,” he says quickly, as though that will make it easier.

“…Oh,” says Yanli, and her eyes are dark.

Jin Zixuan tells his wife a war story. Or, two thousand words of Jin Zixuan getting railed.

Have you ever looked at Jin Zixuan and been like “I bet that mf likes getting PEGGED!!!!!!!!” Well here’s the fic for you.

*YIBO VOICE* DIDI LOVES YOU! (YIZHAN RPF)

never really over by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 10k)

The thing is: it would be good to see Xiao Zhan again — if Yibo could just trust himself to be normal.

Author gdgdbaby is the yizhan master, so here are five of my personal favorites of their fics, starting with this post-filming reunion fic that was the first yizhan fic I ever read and HIT real good after having just finished the show myself.

pedagogy by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 17k) ***

Yibo opens his mouth and says, "I want to learn," barreling past the rapid rise of Xiao Zhan's eyebrows. "To last longer. Will you teach me?"

Quick-fire Yibo comes too easily and Xiao Zhan helps train him to last longer :-)

you’re the reason that i just can’t concentrate by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 10k)

Xiao Zhan hears about it from Yu Bin, which probably should've been the first warning sign.

Yibo was only 20 when they filmed the untamed, which lends itself perfectly to fics like this.

a truth so loud you can’t ignore by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 5k)

It's their last day of filming in Hengdian when the secret comes out.

If yibo has to be a fictional virgin than SO DOES XIAO ZHAN!

if you would only let you by gdgdbaby (Yizhan, E, 32k) ***

"Well?" Yibo demands. Past the severe frown tugging at the corners of his mouth, a flicker of the old him slips through, the persistent boy who shoved his way into Xiao Zhan's space without a second thought and made a home for himself there. "Are you coming or not?"

Xiao Zhan's heart twists. He forcibly settles it back in his chest. He's only told Yibo no once in his entire life, and it was already the hardest thing he's ever had to do. "Okay," Xiao Zhan murmurs, quiet but decisive, and thumbs his phone off. "Let's go."

Like I said, all gdgdbaby fics are incredibly good, super well written, and very hot, but this one does stand out from the bunch for being a Full Epic Romance! This is one of Chi’s favorite fics so that should speak to it’s quality!

baby, who’s counting by nobirdstofly (Yizhan, E, 12k)

Xiao Zhan gasps, trying to rein in another peal of giggles. “What do I owe you anyway?”

Yibo shrugs one shoulder, and his smirk deepens. “Haven’t decided.”

Xiao Zhan’s still staring at him, laughter gone in his dry throat, when he hears someone yell for a reset. Yibo’s eyes are so, so dark, and he hasn’t stopped watching Xiao Zhan this whole time. Xiao Zhan swallows, nods, and pushes every dirty thought out of his head.

(Or: Yibo bets Xiao Zhan he'll break first during a take, Xiao Zhan loses, and it's all downhill from there.)

Ah sex bets, who doesn’t love sex bets!

Mystery Dance by mrsronweasley (Yizhan, E, 16k)

"That? That's your confession?" Yibo's toppled onto Xiao Zhan's side and is clutching his shoulder, trying not to fall over. "That's pathetic!"

"Oh, what, you can do better?" Zhuocheng is pretty flushed and there's a challenge in his voice that Yibo just can't walk away from.

"Hell yeah, I can. Hit me, Yu Bin." Yu Bin cheers and refills Yibo's shot glass. "All right!" Yibo downs the shot, gags only slightly, and says, "Everyone! I'm a fucking virgin!"

WHAT’S better than a Yibo virgin fic? A SECOND YIBO VIRGIN FIC!

This author also writes extremely good yizhan threesomes so here’s three of them!

Some Nights by mrsronweasley (Yizhan/Xuan Lu (Jiang Yanli), E, 2k)

Xuan Lu opened her legs to him and Xiao Zhan wasted no time diving in. He pressed his mouth against her pussy, licking her out steadily as her thighs trembled around him. She was nestled between Yibo's legs and if Xiao Zhan looked up, not only could he see the planes of her body, her small breasts going up and down with her breathing, ribs expanding, her tipped back head and open mouth, but Yibo, gaze boring into Xiao Zhan's as he ate Xuan Lu out.

The entire cast is hot and there is no reason they shouldn’t ALL fuck! Not one reason!!!!!!

gege loves you by mrsronweasley (Yizhan/Wang Zhuocheng (Jiang Cheng)), E, 7k)

"We are very sorry," Xiao Zhan murmured as he unbuttoned Zhuocheng's jeans while Yibo kissed his ear, "for how we've been acting."

"Is this how you apologize to everyone," Zhuocheng panted, hands already going for his zipper to help Xiao Zhan along, "or am I special?"

WHEW LORD!!!!!!!!! WHEW!!!!!!!

Talking in the Dark by mrsronweasley (Yizhan (Side Xiao Zhan/M/F), E, 14k)

Xiao Zhan has a light-hearted romp of a threeway with some friends, then makes the mistake of telling Yibo. It goes down.

A non-yizhan threesome BUT features jealous!yibo which is a ton of fun.

Finally, a couple AUs!

With Joy and Purpose by feenwitch (Yizhan, E, 30k) ***

Yibo has been alone for approximately five Earth years when Xiao Zhan crash lands on his planet.

YIZHAN ANDROID AU!!!!!!!! This is a very star trek-esque universe which is fun, but the fic itself is also CRAZY interesting and moving and beautiful!!!!!!!!! It’s A LOT! This was a rec from Nina, so thank you Nina!

Bound With a Same-Heart Knot by mrsronweasley (Yizhan, E, 59k)

London, 1892. Xiao Zhan, a promising young attache at the Chinese embassy is tasked with showing the new ambassador's son Wang Yibo around London. The inevitable happens.

Victorian AU! I actually think you already read this, but included for posterity.

AND SCENE! This is the result of two months of daily fic reading, having 50 tabs of fic open at any given time, reading truly anything and everything, and Loving The Untamed. I’m SO EXCITED you’re diving into fic for this show and I can’t wait to talk to you about all of them and to have someone to scream with! WOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

#the untamed #fic #the untamed fic rec #holy gosh diddly darn moly #this is long as hell and has approximately 950k words of fic in it #my magnum opus!!!!#what's even more wild is that this literally doesnt even scratch the surface #i am constantly reading more #from the time i started putting this rec together until now #i added two new fics that i read and thought were amazing #there is no dearth of good shit to read in this fandom #ANYWAYS congrats on finishing (tomorrow)!#i cant wait to talk fic!#i hope you enjoy this list!#sorry it is genuinely absurdly long!

72 notes · View notes

frogmentarii · 4 years

Text

QUESTIONS FOR OC CREATORS

Haaaa ok so I am doing this cause i saw @fallout-lou-begas steal it from @tarberrymentats and they both looked like they were havin hella fun so i am commandeering this for my own purposes. So lucky for yall its Emi time (art by the dearest @yesjejunus because yall need to see more of her work)

A) Why are you excited about this character?

Because she's an older woman (57) that breaks a lot of moulds and I love to see it. Aside from just enjoying older characters, Emi isn't a sweet old lady and she isn't here to try and mother anyone. Her drives are entirely her own and while she prioratizes herself and her sister before anyone else, its not always due to complete selfishness and just due to growing up in the wastes (I try to keep her character true to a fend for yourself setting as possible). I think Ill go into detail in another question with this, but I went through a lot of concepts and personalities for Emi before settling on someone who was seasoned and very much a product of the wastes. I think after seeing a lot of other couriers I finally figured out what I wanted to do differently, and that sort of helped guide her to become what she is today.

B) What inspired you to create them?

I think my last line there sort of short answers this. I wanted someone different from the other couriers I saw, and wanted to make one that was distinct or even juxtaposed against some tropes. She's a woman in her late 50s that doesnt try and play mom/granny to the companions, she very much has no stake in what happens to the Mojave, she doesnt care about Benny or that he shot her in the head (such is life in the Mojave, but she did have a job to complete so ripperoni him), and a lot of her motivations are selfish or exist to benefit her sister. She doesnt act 'old' in the fact that she isn't a wise caring soul or a grumpy old man, but rather her age is shown through her experience, and this also shapes her personality. She's never had to formally 'grow up' so she can come off as immature and irritating for her own entertainment, but she doesn't have youthful ignorance for how the world works. She knows how to be responsible but she doesnt have to act like it outwardly, even with her Tragic Caregiver Backstory.

C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story?

To a large degree in the beginning, yes, and to specific degrees now, also yes. Writing in general isnt my strong point though I did know what I wanted for her. The main image is there but the details are funky, and Ive been slowly hammering those out as I work along with her and Camila's stories. There's been some huge changes along the way that help push both of them towards an ending I like and that fits them, and even if it takes forever and I never actually write a fic, I'll be happy when she finally feels completed in New Vegas.

Aside from that, she kind of fits in anywhere in regards to AUs. My friend @yesjejunus and I have probably like 40000 fucking aus for our OCs and all of them feel just as organic and their canon stories.

D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?

So I know I have an 'original concept Emilia' art on here where she looked like Laura Croft and had aviators but that wasnt even her first concept. I had originally wanted to make a petite southern belle type from Louisiana who used a shot gun and had a mean streak, but as I kept playing with concepts Emi really started to lean other places. Another huge change was her personality. Even when her concept got settled as a sniper from Mexico, she was suppose to be an early 30s caravan guard who was way too sure of herself. While there are reminents of that concept still in her, she has a lot more experience in the wastes and in think-on-your-feet situations to back up her attitude. Another thing she required was dropping her "take me seriously" personality with more goofy "i do what i want cause why not" traits.

E) Are they someone you would get along with? Would they get along with you?

Emi can get along with anyone at a surface level, for a small while, if it will benefit her or she wants to pass time. She really doesn't have interest in folks who arent interesting or beneficial in some way. Since I don't really offer her much, and am a bit of a wet bag, she might yank my chain for her own funsies or she'd have no interest.

And while I did indeed give Emi my go with the flow attitude, I think I wouldn't be able to keep up with her. Emi is very fast paced and doesnt necessarily have regard for those she decides to pick up as drinking buddies for the night. Def dont trust her with my life, and knowing the shit she gets into I'd def want to steer clear of it....like a trainwreck its much better to watch her from a safe distance, lol.

F) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

A lot of affection from a meta standpoint? I've worked with Emi and Cam a lot since creating them, and they've def come a long way since their original concepts. I wouldn't say their story is quite where I want it yet, but I am quite happy with it overall.

That, and Ive met so many awesome writers along the way with Emi. Not all of my friends have posted fic but the amount of world building and having our characters interact and talking OCs ive done with them has placed both Emi and their OCs in a special place for me. Sure her having her own story is fun but I much more prefer the bonds Ive created with people over OCs and I think thats a bit more of a cherished component to character creation for me.

G) What trait of theirs bothers you the most?

Literally? That she likes to be irritating if she feels she can get away with it (or even if she cant). Actually? That she has a very "I shelter you and feed you therefore I make the rules, period." stance on how she takes care of her charge. She lets a lot of shit slide with Camila but things get very Rapunzel-esque at times.

H) What trait do you admire most?

How sure of herself she is. Even if its to a fault, she trusts herself and her judgements. That sort of confidence is something I strive to have haha.

To a lesser degree, and more of a meta point I wanted to make with her, just...her appearance I suppose? To me she's attractive, but she also has a lot of traits that aren't conventionally attractive and that's played a lot into how Ive wanted her to be. Again she's 57 years old. She has age to her body, her skin wrinkles and droops, her tits sag, she has the body of someone who uses chems, and yet despite her age and breaking of beauty standards ive made it a point to show that she is desired or thought of as attractive in non fetish specific circumstances. She herself, while aro, also still has an active sex drive and I really wanted this to be a backseat part of her character, as I feel like fandom in general shafts older women in this department (this also goes for a lot of her non 'old lady' traits I give her too). She still has sexual needs and is still very much sexually active, and she is still found to be a regular sort of attractive and is desired by those she gets involved with.

J) Did you have to manipulate or exclude canon factors to allow them to create their character?

Yes? Ish, to a degree. I didnt have to but I wanted to. I also did a lot of headcanoning with post Mexico for her early life which, afaik is free real estate for lore/nothing super detailed has been given in canon.

Given that she and Camila both shape their stories as individuals, I did have to split up some canon elements to follow two seperate characters, but other than that I really just had to make sure Emilia's story wasnt "boring" in the fact that she again, has no real stake in what happens to Vegas/the Mojave.

I) Do you prefer to keep them in their canon universe?

Cackles in 'which au will I obsess with today'

For the most part yes, however I love placing her in new things or different stories. She may be 'my courier' but really shes just the frog granny that goes into whatever au I am feeling at the time.

#courier six #emilia #emi #emilia vazquez #fnv

47 notes · View notes

ghostbustermelanieking · 5 years

Text

phantom weights (pt 1 of ?)

season 11, post my struggle iv. part of my series that i write as i rewatch the x files.

Summary: In the wake of their second encounter, Mulder, Scully, and Jackson reconnect (both by accident and on purpose).

note: i am posting this in parts simply because it is way too long so far, and it’s easier to post it in small chunks instead of a couple big ones. this story basically examines the aftermath of msiv, and how jackson and m&s come together. there are some references to events occuring in the lies told and praescitum, particularly the scheme that CSM puts on in lies, as it debunks that msiii garbage. (there are some indirect references to a mountain in colorado; it is, of course, AU, but i see parts of it as canon compliant, which make an appearance here.) additionally, i reused some parts of proelium and pervicacia, mostly because i am too attached to these old fics, and didn’t want to change some things. although i promise this fic is different than these two.

warning up front for some slight discussion of suicidal ideation (as shown in MSIV), some references to death and violence, and discussion (in the name of debunking) of CSM��s paternity claims. it’s bullshit, but i had to address it somehow. now let’s forget it lol.

---

He was supposed to be dead right now.

That was the whole plan. He would die for the man who said he was his father, for all the people he'd hurt, for the future he'd never have. For his parents, who they buried without him months ago, who died because of him. He would die in place of Mulder and give his birth mother the chance to start over. (What the fuck would she do if it had really been Mulder and she was stuck with Jackson, great disaster that he is? What would happen to Sarah, to Bri, to anyone else he tries to connect with? What would happen to him?)

But he didn't die. He took a bullet straight to the forehead and sunk deep into the brackish, salty water, salt and copper at the back of his throat, but he didn't die.

He heard the man who shot him—the man he'd thought was his birth father—get shot himself, multiple times. He fell into the water feet away from where Jackson was drifting, his blood in the water, and Jackson was still waiting for death when he felt something like a release. Like something snapped loose in his head, a taut wire breaking, something set free. A weight gone, and something coming in to replace it. A rush of emotions from a man Jackson had never, ever felt before; the grief of the man standing up on the dock, like a crash overwhelming his brain. It hurt, almost worse than the bullet in his head.

As Jackson drifted, waiting for death, he understood suddenly. It all became clear. Mulder wasn't making it up when he said he was his father; he wasn't ignorant to everything that had happened. He was telling the truth.

It was too much to take, and Jackson didn't want to think, and he didn't die. He drifted far away from the docks, the harbor, before rising out of the water like the newly baptized.

---

Mulder and Scully told their story to the police again and again on that dock in Norfolk. Scully was quiet and numb, teary, her head bent forward as she answered questions in a murmur. Mulder would barely answer their questions, tense and nervous and furious. He asked about Skinner several times before he got an answer, his voice rising towards a yell before they finally told him that Skinner was alive and had been taken to the hospital for surgery. Scully sniffled behind her hand, her eyes squeezed shut, swaying slightly in place.

The police gave up and told them that they could go. There was no sign of Spender's body, of course, and no sign of Jackson's, either. If Mulder knew how this works, he suspected that they'd never find the bodies. (He flinched at thinking of his son as the body, as a lifeless corpse somewhere out there in the deep. It felt like a betrayal. It stung, the casualness of it. He couldn't believe he was gone.)

They got into their car, but Mulder didn't move to start it. He had a headache, his skull pounding, tears building at the back of his throat. He was as shellshocked as Scully, his stomach rolling with nausea, his muscles tense with protest. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. He leaned forward abruptly, burying his face in his hands as his eyes welled with tears. It wasn't fucking supposed to happen this way, goddamnit, it was supposed to go differently, and he wanted to shout with the unfairness of it. He wanted to scream until his throat was raw, he wanted to pull this dock apart board by board. He wanted his son back. He wanted his son back.

He'd been hallucinating a little since all of it; he'd had flashes of currents, of freezing cold and salty wetness and the taste of blood in his mouth. Of his son's face, still in the black-green water, a trickle of blood across his forehead. His eyes shutting, he saw it again: William's pale face in the depths of the murky saltwater.

He shuddered, biting back a scream of protest—he didn't want to upset Scully further, sitting quiet in the passenger seat with a hand pressed over her mouth and her eyes wet with tears. He pressed his face harder against his fingers, his palms intended to muffle the sound, and sobbed.

---

They drove to a hotel. Mulder was quiet the whole time, his eyes red, his face pale and streaked with tears. Scully thought, absently, that he was probably mad at her. Maybe he resented her for the things she said, or the things she didn't. Maybe for sending their son away all those years ago.

She didn't have the headspace to process any of this. She was shaking. She was shivering, wrapped up in her coat in the passenger seat, her chin trembling like she was going to weep again. She had a hand instinctively over her belly, but she was mostly not thinking of the baby; she was mostly thinking of him, of her first baby. Her William. And she was also thinking about nothing at all, her mind blank. She was so cold, her jaw quivering, her cheeks wet and salty. She felt scraped raw, stinging; she couldn't breathe.

They drove in silence. A sharp pain began at the center of her forehead and spread, jarring her as it rattled against her skull. When she shut her eyes, she saw water lapping at murky sand, cars and headlights on the highway. She gritted her teeth and shook her head until the pain subsided. A hot tear escaped from under her eyelid, trickling down her cheek.

It wasn't until they got to the hotel, until they entered the room and slid to opposite sides of the bed and Mulder flipped off the light and did not reach for her that she realized what was happening. She was in shock. That was the only explanation for it. She was in shock. She couldn't explain the things she said, the words spilling out of her mouth on that dock, but she knew she did not mean them. She knew almost as soon as she said them that she didn't mean them. She was in shock and she couldn't get warm; she was shaking, huddled under the thin hotel comforter. She felt so nauseous, the pillowcase cool and uncomforting under her cheek; the room was spinning. She wanted her baby. She wanted her son back.

She suspected that Mulder—Mulder, lying on the other side of the bed with so much space between them and a hand pressed to his temple like he had a headache, his eyes squeezed shut—was in shock, too. After everything, she didn't see how he couldn't be. He had killed his own father just a few moments after seeing his son get shot. His son. His baby, who he had only seen twice since the day he was born. His son, who he could not save, who neither of them could save.

Scully made a sharp, keening sound and buried her face into the pillow, clutching it hard. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. They were supposed to be safe, both of them. She'd been terrified all this time that she would lose Mulder all over again, that he wouldn't come back like last time and she would never get to tell him about the baby or do all the things that she was supposed to do with him, but somehow she never really thought she would lose William. Not again. She thought she'd be able to save them.

She kept seeing her baby with a bullet in his head, hearing Mulder's primal shout. She felt the loss of him in a way she hadn't felt in years, aside from the horrific few hours when she'd thought he might be dead before realizing that he wasn't: she was thinking of the weight of William as an infant in her arms, his soft skin and downy hair. A phantom weight she hadn't quite felt since she'd given him up for adoption, yet one she'd still carried with her for years. She couldn't believe the things she said on that dock. That he wasn't their son, that he was an experiment and she was never his mother. The words didn't feel like they were coming out of her mouth. The shock of the things Skinner told her, and William asking her to let him go, and Mulder telling her that he was dead, had manifested into that, but she didn't mean it. She didn't know what she was saying, a betrayal to everything she felt and everyone she loves. She didn't want to tell Mulder about the baby this way.

Her teeth chattered involuntarily as another wave of cold washed over her. She curled into a tight ball, her hand back over her belly before she realized what she was doing and pulled it away. Was it a betrayal, she wondered, to love this child after everything that has happened to her first two? She wanted her son back. She wanted to tell him she was sorry; she wanted it more than anything in the world. She pulled the edge of the comforter tighter around her and wiped tears away, just as another piercing headache hit her.

Scully gritted her teeth to keep from crying out. She was dizzy, her head spinning, but she didn't realize what was happening until she saw it: the darkened road, the headlights blurring like starlight. The coldness, the wetness, the roar of cars echoing in her ears, the sound of wet shoes squelching on the pavement. And a voice, hard and angry and sad: Just so you know. Okay?

She realized all at once what was happening, and the shock of it nearly made her shoot up in bed. “Jackson,” she whispered, gripping the covers desperately, realizing too late that she'd spoken out loud. Beside her, Mulder made a pained, wordless sound and turned over. She pressed a hand to her mouth and tried, I'm so sorry. But she had no idea if he heard.

She needed to tell Mulder. She closed her eyes and crawled closer to the warm mass of Mulder's body. He was tense and rigid, but when she burrowed under the tent of his arm, he didn't pull away. She pressed her nose to his side and whispered, “Mulder.”

He grunted in response, his eyes squeezed shut.

She pressed a hand to his chest, swallowed back her tears, said, “Mulder, I think William is alive.”

He opened his eyes, dark and wet, and looks down at her. “You can see him?” he whispered tremulously. She nodded.

His eyes slid back shut, and he shook his head hard. “Jesus Christ, I thought I was imagining it,” he murmured, gathering her up in his arms, bundling her against him. She rested her cheek against his chest, sniffling and dizzy.

“I-I thought I was going insane. I… I think I've been seeing him, too,” Mulder whispered to her in broken disbelief, and she blinked with surprise. “But I didn't know… I've never seen him before… how is this happening, Scully? I saw him fall, I…” His voice broke; he squeezed her tighter, choking out another sob against her scalp.

“I don't know. I don't know how,” she said, her voice shaking. She was crying again, tears sliding down her face. “I just… I can feel him. He's safe.” She didn't quite understand how Mulder could see William now, and she could barely believe it herself, but she didn't want to question it. He was alive, and if Mulder saw him, too, that made it real. He was alive, and that was all that mattered. Her baby was still alive.

“Thank God,” Mulder breathed, stroking the back of her head. “I didn't believe it when I… I didn't want to believe it in case it wasn't true. I-I am so glad that you feel it, too.” He pressed his lips to Scully's forehead, shaking in her embrace, tears falling on her hair.

She felt a sudden, desperate need to apologize for everything she said to him on the docks. He was the one who met their son, who hugged him, who saw him twice with a bullet in his head (twice, twice now, goddamnit). He was the one who never got to be with him as a baby, who didn't get to hear that his son wanted to know him better. (He had to be William's father. He had to be. She did a test when William was a baby, and she thought that Mulder might've done one again when they were in Norfolk, but she knew she was going to do another one as soon as she got a chance. First fucking thing. But somehow, the fact that Mulder could suddenly, miraculously hear Jackson was comforting to her, was enough to convince her that he was William's father. It had to mean something, didn't it? She held onto that hope tightly.)

She didn't mean what she said, not one bit of it. She was in shock. She didn't mean it. She felt like she was going to throw up. She had already thrown up once tonight, retching over a trash can by the water while Mulder whispered her name helplessly and rubbed her back, and she didn't think it was because of the baby. She heard the gunshots Mulder fired into the smoker's chest, every single one; she'd felt them deep in her bones.

She wasn't going to tell Mulder what Skinner said—especially now that she was nearly sure that Mulder was Jackson's father—but she needed to apologize. She needed to tell him she didn't mean what she said. She needed to tell him right now.

“Mulder, I didn't mean what I said,” she blurted, and his arms went stiff around her. She sniffled, burying her face in his neck. “I didn't,” she murmured, balling a hand in his shirt. “I was scared. I was in shock. But I didn't mean it, Mulder. He's our son. He'll always, always be our son.” She had to believe that, she had to.

His fingers brushed over his spine. “Are you saying this because you know he's alive now?” he asked quietly, and she knew that everything she'd said had hit him hard.

Wincing, she shook her head, frantic and immensely sorry, digging her fingernails into his shoulders. “No,” she said quickly, nearly stammering. “No, Mulder, no, he's our son. For God's sake, he's our son. He's our son.” She was crying again, near hiccupping, clinging to him like he's a life raft. “He's my son,” she whispered hollowly. “He's my baby, and I just… he asked us to let him go. I didn't know what to do. I… I couldn't lose him again.”

“Shhh,” Mulder was saying, his voice trembling. He was still crying. He was stroking her hair again, her back, her neck. “Shhhh, Scully, it's okay. It's okay.”

“I'm his mother,” she said. She was remembering the cold feeling of fear, of surprise and uncertainty just a few days ago, when she took the pregnancy tests and saw the results, sitting on the grimy tiles of a bathroom floor inside the handicapped stall. Of guilt, even. She didn't know how to do this again and it scared the shit out of her. She thought that she might want to do this again, be somebody's mother, but she had no idea how. She was Jackson's mother, even if he would never think of her that way, and now she was a mother all over again.

Mulder clung to her and she clung to him and they cried. She held onto the image of William—of Jackson—walking in the rain, huddling for warmth under a bridge. I'm here, she thought desperately towards her son as she started to drift off. I'll always be here, if you need me. Always.

---

They had breakfast next morning, at the continental breakfast in the lobby. Scully didn't exactly feel like eating, but she made herself. She was thinking about the baby, about proper diets and protein and three good meals a day, when she got a spoonful of scrambled eggs, three strips of limp bacon, a cup of yogurt with berries. She ate gingerly, thinking of the pregnancy tests that she lined up along the toilet paper holder, the rush of emotions that she'd felt when she saw that they were all positives. Her baby. She was going to have a baby.

She could feel Mulder's eyes on her, watching her as gingerly as she was eating. “Honey…” he said softly. He reached out to touch her shoulder, his fingers hovering, before he lowered them to touch her stomach.

She reached down and covered his hand with hers. “I know,” she said. “It's a lot to take.”

“It's… it's wonderful news,” he began, before something like guilt passed over his face and he shook his head. “I mean, I'm not sure how it's… how—how do you feel about this, Scully?”

She looked down at her plate, at their hands together. She curled her fingers around his. “I… I don't know,” she whispered. “It's… it's not what I would've chosen for myself. Not now. Maybe years ago… but… I don't know, Mulder.” She squeezed his hand. She lifted her head to meet his eyes. “I… I think I might want this. I do. I can't not. Mulder, I can't lose another child. I can't.”

“I know,” he said softly, and she knew that he did. They had both lost so many people. They had lost their son again and again, seen him dead far too many times. Neither of them could endure another loss.

He rubbed a gentle thumb over her abdomen, where it was slightly rounding, and she felt like crying all over again. She sniffled, wiping a tear away. “I suppose…” she said in a tremulous voice, “that I should ask you how you feel about this. If… if this is something you want.” She'd considered every possible response when she was trying to figure out how to tell him, and she had tried to focus on the ones where he was happy, but she kept coming back to the ones where he wasn't.

His eyes widened, his thumb moving over her stomach again. “Scully, of course,” he whispered. “Of course it is.” He lifted her hand in a fluid motion to kiss the back of it, and she sniffled again, her eyes shutting.

“I… it's scary,” he admitted, his voice breaking. “The prospect of another child… I think we're both a little apprehensive. But I want this as long as you want this. I've always wanted this with you.”

Her eyes filled abruptly, and she jerked forward in her seat towards him. He had his arms around her immediately, her chin on his shoulder. She made a shaky sobbing sound, one hand over her mouth and the other pressed hard into his shoulder. He put a hand to the back of her head, whispered soothing things into her ear. She knew that people were staring, but she didn't care. She held him tightly, nearly in his lap.

“I-I think we should go to the doctor,” she whispered in his ear. “Right away. To make sure everything is okay.” They both knew all the things that could go wrong, all the possibilities that they wouldn't be able to see this through. She didn't want to say the possibilities out loud; all she wanted was to know that everything was okay.

“Yeah. Yeah, we'll go right away.” He kissed the side of her head. “Everything's going to be okay, honey,” he whispered. “I promise.”

You don't know that, she wanted to say, but she didn't. She just held onto him harder and nodded. It was all too much, too much to process; all she wanted was for them to be okay, for everyone to be okay.

When they'd finally pulled away, when Scully was wiping her eyes with a napkin and taking another tentative bite of yogurt, Mulder spoke again. Spoke in a hesitant voice, as if he was unsure of what her reaction would be. “Scully,” he said, carefully, “do you… do you think we'll ever see him again?”

Her jaw clenched automatically. She looked back down at her plate. All she really wanted right now, she thought, was to go home. To get into their bed together, slip back into that sweatshirt of his and crawl under the covers and sleep for a week. She wanted her son safe and at home, and she wanted her baby to be okay. She wanted her family to be safe and together.

“I don't know, Mulder,” she whispered. “But I hope so. I really do.”

---

Jackson never really wanted to kill anyone.

He kept trying to tell himself that in the wake of his fucked up rap sheet: that he never really wanted to kill anyone. He put on a tough persona—he had to at that stupid school they sent him to—but half of the stuff he'd done was just a stupid prank that went too far. The car accident, the tantrums that exploded (sometimes literally) into chaos, the stupid fucking prank on Bri and Sarah that gutted him to the core. Fucked up pranks, horrible pranks, but just pranks, pranks he would always regret right after he did them.

But he had killed people now. His parents, if only indirectly, and those fucking lackeys who came after him. He killed them; that was him. It was under his control.

He could tell himself all he wanted that his parents’ deaths were not his fault, but he knew they were. They came looking for him, the bastards who shot his mom and dad; if his parents had adopted another baby, they'd be alive and well and probably happy right now. (With a normal kid who didn't play shitty, horrible pranks and destroy half their house, who didn't pout and act sullen, and who told them how much he loved them.) He knew that people blamed him for his parents’ deaths, that people thought he was a murderer. (He had gone to his grandmother's house in Wyoming after a week on the run, and she had slammed the door on his face. She acted like she didn't know him. She accused him of murdering her son, and he'd cried like a baby on her porch before running away in a panic.)

He used to tell himself that he wasn't a murderer, no matter what people thought of him. He might've been something of a monster, but at least he wasn't a murderer. And then he killed those people before they could kill him.

Now he tried to tell himself it was all in self defense. But it didn't work. He still woke up screaming most nights, images of blood and gore and his parents in body bags on either side of him imprinted on his eyelids.

He didn't know where to go. He thought about calling Sarah, that first night sleeping under a bridge, but he couldn't bring himself to pull her into this. Not again. He was going to put her in more danger if he did that. Aside from that, she was probably pissed as hell he didn't meet her, if she didn't think he was dead all over again.

How many people thought he was dead at this point? He knew his birth mother didn't. Scully, Ginger, whatever her name was. He'd showed her he wasn't dead. He thought that he might've showed that guy Mulder, too, if inadvertently. (He didn't entirely understand what the hell was happening with his birth father, but he thought it went something like this: the creepy smoker fucker had put some kind of telepathic block in his mind to keep him from connecting to the Mulder guy. To make Jackson think that he was his birth father. And when he died, it stopped working. He didn't even want to dig too far into that fucking mess, but he was pretty fucking glad that the smoker wasn't his birth father, as far as he knew now.)

He didn't know where to go, so he headed west again. Stole a car from a Walmart parking lot and just fucking drove. Maybe he should head north, go to Canada, he thought at one point. Maybe get out of the country completely. Maybe settle down and get a damn job before he ran out of money. But truthfully, he had no idea where the fuck he should go.

There was a small, traitorous part of him that offered, You could go stay with them. Mulder and Scully, his weird-ass birth parents who called each other by their last names. Who apparently loved him a lot. Who fucking gave him up and never came looking for him, who had no rights as his parents. They gave that right up, and they were not his parents.

No, he told himself furiously. Absolutely not. Only as a last resort. Never. He could not do that to his parents.

So he drove, moving into the Midwest. The furthest he got last time was Wyoming, back to his childhood home, before he turned around and slunk back to Virginia with his tail between his legs. This time, he told himself, he was going to go further. All the way to the fucking Pacific.

---

A few days after Mulder and Scully got home, they went to the hospital to meet with one of Scully's old friends from the hospital to confirm the pregnancy. Just to make sure. Mulder held her hand while the blood was drawn, staying right at her side, whispered in her ear that it would be okay no matter what. Grateful for his presence, she tried her best to believe that.

While they were waiting for the results, Scully slipped downstairs, found another friend and asked her to run William's DNA against Mulder's. She had to know, she had to know for sure. The fact that Mulder could hear Jackson now coupled with the DNA test he ran against both of them back in Norfolk gave her some comfort, but she was still uncertain enough that she needed to check. She had to know for sure. Just to reassure herself.

She hadn't told Mulder about it, and she wouldn't if she didn't need to. The entire idea made her nauseous, made her want to find the smoker’s corpse and put ten more bullets in his skull. It couldn't be true. It couldn't be true. It wasn't true, not until it was proven. She had refused to believe in so much, and she would refuse to believe in this until it was anything more than a rumor. And she wouldn't burden Mulder with it if she didn't have to.

She made the request, spent the next few minutes in a bathroom, forehead pressed into the metal of the stall, breathing uneasily. She went downstairs to find out if she was going to be a mother again.

The pregnancy was confirmed. She was over three months along, the doctor estimated with a cheery smile. Behind her, Scully heard Mulder's sharp intake of breath, felt his hand clamp hard around hers. Her heart was beating too fast.

She insisted immediately on doing an ultrasound to make sure that everything was okay, and it seemed that everything was. The doctor reassured her as she moved the wand over her abdomen, telling her that everything looked good, everyone looked healthy She could see the image of the baby on the screen (her baby), could hear the pulsing whump-whump of the heartbeat, and she couldn't help the rush of tears. She couldn't believe this was really happening. Looking at the screen, she felt a powerful rush of love pulsing through her. This was all happening so fast she could barely process it, but she knew she loved this baby already, without being able to help it. She loved it more than words.

Mulder wiped away her tears, wrapping his hand around hers; he was crying, too, she could hear him. He asked where the baby was, pointing to the screen, and she showed him. She showed him their baby, and she felt his lips press gently to her hair.

---

When everything was done with, she slipped back downstairs to get the results of the DNA test.

It was what she wanted to hear, to her great relief; William was hers and Mulder's. He had always been hers and Mulder's. It was the best news she could've gotten, and she nearly sobbed with the relief of it all. Crumpled the results in her hand, trembling from head to toe. It wasn’t true. It was a lie, a horrible lie, but Jackson was their son. She cursed the smoker in his watery grave, but she felt a little lighter now, the weight of Skinner's confession off of her shoulders. It wasn’t true. William was theirs, and Mulder would never know there was another possibility.

She found Mulder down in the lobby, lingering by the gift shop with a plastic bag clutched in one hand, looking at something on his phone. He looked up at her with soft, relieved eyes when she approached, said, “Hey,” in a gentle voice, and held up the bag. “I, uh… I bought you something. From the gift shop.” Surprised, she took the bag as he explained. “I was poking around in there, and—yeah, that, check it out.” She pulled a small cardboard box out, and he nodded eagerly. “That's the brand you drank before, right?” he asked. “When you were—with William? The caffeine-free tea?”

Scully nodded, stunned, turning the box over and over in her hands. “You remembered?” she whispered in astonishment, although she should not be astonished. Mulder remembered things like that, held onto the memories like they were something precious. She could remember the first time she'd drank it in front of him—wearing his sweatshirt on her couch, him sitting beside where she was sprawled, his hand on her knee as she'd drank from a Georgia On My Mind mug—but she had no idea he did.

“Yeah.” He smiled again, reaching out to touch her elbow. “I couldn't believe they had it. I grabbed three boxes of that, and, uh, something else I thought was kinda cute…” She rummaged to the bottom of the bag and found a small stuffed cat, tiny enough to be tucked into the corner of a crib. “For the, uh, baby. I dunno if you like it,” he continued, “but, uh…”

She cut him off, moving forward to hug him hard. She seized his face in her hands and kissed him thankfully. She was nearly shaking with the weight of it all, of this baby and of their son, out there somewhere, and of every single thing that he missed out on last time. “I do like it,” she whispered, smiling, her face hidden against his neck. “Thank you. Thank you so, so much.”

---

Jackson used to want to travel all the time. He hated Virginia, he'd whined, and he wanted to go somewhere else, somewhere exciting. And then they'd sent him to that school, and it had been anything but exciting, and he'd felt even more trapped than before. He wanted to go places, he wanted to be free and not have to answer to anyone and do anything he wanted to whenever he wanted it.

Now he had that. He was alone, he had no one telling him what to do or where to go, and his future could be whatever he wanted it to be, barring the fact that people were actively trying to kill him and that a lot of people thought he was a murderer. And he hated it. He wanted his parents back more than anything in the world. He kept expecting them to be there, telling him what to do: No, Jackson, don't do that. Don't be stupid, son. Be careful, be smart, be safe. He wanted to ask their advice on things, wanted them to be with him. The one time in his life he wished he was Haley Joel Osment. (In Sixth Sense, not in that stupid Pay It Forward movie.) He'd give anything to be haunted by his parents at this point. He'd give anything to have them back.

He made it all the way to California without any major hitches. It was uneventful; miles of driving on empty roads, stopping to see sights, eating fast food in the driver's seat of his car and sleeping curled up in the backseat in parking lots until some cop told him to keep moving. In Arizona, he considered going covert, dying his hair and getting a bunch of piercings, doing something besides just projecting so he looked like someone else, but the most he did was give himself a haircut because his hair was getting too long. A horrible, horrible haircut that he could practically see his mom cringing at. It looked like he was attacked by a lawnmower. He bought a baseball cap at the next visitor center and pulled it low over his head.

He made it to California. He went to San Diego for no particular reason, and found himself in a cemetery for no particular reason, and that was about when he realized that there was probably a reason he was here. He mulled around the gravestones for a long moment before arriving at a small, shiny one that read Emily Sim. Died when she was three years old, a week after her parents did.

Jackson winced, leaning forward to put his palm on top of the stone. As he did, a rush of images swept over him, images that made him sick with nausea, dizziness. Emily Sim, a little girl sucking her thumb before a bathroom floor streaked with watery blood; Emily on the floor of a children's home, a much younger Mulder and Scully knelt beside her; Emily Sim in a hospital bed, eyes screwed shut, face coated in sweat. Dying.

Jackson staggered back from the headstone, his heart in his throat, coated in sweat despite the relatively cool temperature. He was breathing hard. He knew immediately what this was. He'd had a sister. He'd had a sister who somehow wasn't Scully's, either, and she'd been an experiment like him, and she had died. No wonder Ginger seemed so protective of him, so panicky at the thought of his death; it wasn't just because she was his birth mother, it was because she'd gone through it before. He'd had a sister, an experiment who suffered her whole life and lost both her parents and died before he was even born. He swayed on his feet, fell to his knees in the graveyard. He was crying, and he didn't know why, but it made him furious, that he'd had a sister who was dead now because of these bastards who had murdered his parents. He'd always wanted a sister as a kid. A little sister he could protect, or a big sister who would stick up for him.

Her name was Emily. Emily Christine Sim. He resolved to remember that as he climbed to his feet, brushed dirt off of his jeans. Half his family gone, her entire family gone. A sister he would never know. Emily Sim. He pressed his palm to the stone and thought, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that this happened to you. I'm so sorry I'll never get to know you.

After that, he didn't want to stay in California. He was getting flashes of other things, of a dark-haired girl that looked like that Mulder guy in pain, running, dying. Bad things had happened here. He looked out over the Pacific, at the great westward spread of the ocean, and then he got into his car and drove back east.

#it's gonna be painful but then it's gonna be not painful i promise #xf rewatch #xf fanfic #i wrote this

135 notes · View notes

aerinmelina · 5 years

Text

Magic Touch Part IV

Read part 3 here. This is the final part to this ficlet series. I didn’t think it’d wind up being this long. :) In which Brackendra fluff unfolds. Plus some silliness from the boys.

@fairyprincesskendra sending love!!

Let me know what you guys think. Should I write more ficlets? These are apparently easier for me to sit down and write rather than longer oneshots. Or I can just shut up and keep these things to myself I suppose LOL

——

I promise I’m not angry.

Kendra held onto a communicator coin Bracken had given her ages ago. Are you sure?

Positive, he answered. I’ve just been busy here.

It’s just... you haven’t responded to my calls, and I thought you were going to visit a couple days ago, but you didn’t show up... Kendra rubbed the bridge of her nose while she contemplated what she wanted to say.

I’m not angry, Bracken confirmed once again.

I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have told Warren about what happened.

I overreacted. It’s really not that big of a deal... I was just embarrassed, and I apologize for the way I behaved.

And I shouldn’t have betrayed your confidence like that, Kendra insisted.

Well, then I suppose we both learned lessons, Bracken responded. Perhaps some things should not be disclosed to others, and perhaps I can be a bit of a drama queen at times.

Kendra giggled at that remark. Bracken the drama queen. Who knew?

My mother, he answered. She knew. Knows. I went to prison because I didn’t listen to her, remember? I believe my exact train of thought was something akin to, ‘my mother’s failure to investigate is surely in need of correction, regardless of the fact that she has warned me to stay away. I’m going to find out what’s happen— oh, wait, maybe Mother was correct after all.’

Bracken’s words were accompanied by a sense of mirth, and Kendra laughed at both the feelings and the words which he had conveyed to her. I hate to break it to you but that’s not drama, Bracken. That’s just plain old rebellion.

Hmm. I have been on a bit of a rebellious streak as well, I suppose...

Sure. Whatever you say, Kendra teased. Bracken the dramatic rebel. For some reason, I just can’t picture that in my brain.

That’s because you’re picturing it wrong. For one, you didn’t give my title enough flair. It should be thought of as ‘Bracken, the Dramatic Rebel.’ Also, imagine some jazzy guitar music in the background and perhaps fireworks.

Jazzy guitar music?!

The stuff that Seth listens to.

That’s not jazz!

Whatever he called it. I liked it.

Bracken proceeded to hum the tune of some Lenny Kravitz song that Seth listened to when he was thinking about doing something brash for the sake of having something to do, and Kendra nearly lost her mind with laughter.

You are not my brother, she advised.

Thank heaven for small favors like that one.

What? You wouldn’t want to be my brother?

She could feel the sigh of exasperation which came from the unicorn boy. I would prefer to be your date.

That caught Kendra’s attention. Date?

Correct.

...so are you going to expound on that one, or am I just supposed to guess at what’s to follow?

Would you like for me to expound?

Yes. Yes, I would.

Well, perhaps if you made your way down to the back yard, I’d be willing to explain myself a little more.

Kendra sat up on her bed and walked over to the window in order to peer outside. Sure enough, Bracken was walking up toward the porch.

You sneak, she thought. Before she could deposit the coin where she usually stowed it, however, she received Bracken’s response.

I told you I was dramatic.

She grinned and ran out of her room toward the back yard in order to collect her unicorn.

——

Seth knew that Dale had been a long shot, but he couldn’t resist.

“You want me to what?” his cousin asked.

“Distract Bracken. Or I’ll distract him, and then you can rub the back of his head,” Seth answered.

Dale gave Seth an incredulous look. “Uh-huh. And why would you want me to invade his personal space like that?”

“Kendra said it makes him fall asleep, and I want to know if anyone else can do it!”

“Why don’t you just ask him?”

Seth blinked. “Where’s the fun in that?”

Dale shook his head. “You said Warren recruited you?”

“Yeah.”

“And you think I’d somehow be successful when you and Warren weren’t?”

Seth nodded. “You have the element of surprise. He’d never expect you to join in!”

“How old are you again?”

Seth folded his arms across his chest. “Look... if you don’t want to help me, you can just say so.”

“Oh, no. I’m in,” Dale committed.

The boy blinked. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah. I’m in. Now where’s Warren? We’ll need his help for what I’ve got planned.” He was wearing a straight face, which made him very difficult to read.

“Really, really? Seriously?”

Dale rolled his eyes. “Yes. Are you going to help me find Warren or not?”

Seth stood up from where he’d been sitting, a large smile across his face. “He’s over here! Follow me!”

——

Kendra and Bracken were sitting on the couch watching another movie with a bowl of popcorn between them. She’d taken it upon herself to make sure he saw all of the Disney classics, and they were currently viewing Aladdin. Bracken was positively captivated by the screen, which caused her to smile to herself.

He was adorable.

She picked up the bowl of popcorn and placed it in her lap, then scooter closer to him and rested her head on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around her and smiled at her before returning his attention to the television.

Maybe five minutes later, Dale, Warren and Seth walked into the room, with Dale holding the other two by their ears. Warren and Seth were complaining and creating so much noise that Kendra paused the film and she and Bracken both turned around to see what the ruckus was about.

Dale released his hold on Warren and Seth and said, gesturing to Bracken, “You two owe him an apology.”

Warren and Seth looked annoyed, but Warren recovered first. Bracken, for his part, appeared to be slightly bemused.

“You’re right, Dale. I’m sorry, Bracken. I shouldn’t have acted the way I did. I’m old enough to know what crossing a line looks like, and I definitely crossed it.” Warren nudged Seth with his elbow, prompting the boy to speak next.

“Yeah, yeah, okay. Sorry, Bracken.”

The unicorn bowed his head toward them. “Apologies accepted. We’re watching a movie. Would you care to join?”

Warren clapped his friend on the shoulder. “The day I want to sit down and observe a kiss fest between you and my baby cousin is the day I ask you to please kill me first. No thanks, man, but you two have fun. Just... keep it PG.” He winked at Kendra, who flushed bright red.

“We’re just watching a movie!” she cried.

“Sure.” Wink. “Watching a movie.” Wink.

Seth cackled, and Dale stepped forward and cleared his throat. “Perhaps it would be a good idea for you two to leave Kendra and Bracken alone to enjoy the rest of their show?” The way he delivered the question clearly indicated that it wasn’t a suggestion.

“Good going, Seth. You’ve activated Mom!Dale,” Warren remarked. “Enjoy your movie, you two,” he added, then left the room.

Seth remained rooted to the floor. “I’ll leave,” he promised, “but I gotta know - does Kendra really have magic fingers, or will it work for anyone? Ow!” Dale had lightly whacked him upside the head at that question.

“I brought you here to apologize, not pester,” the older man insisted. “You’re done apologizing. Now leave him in peace.”

Seth rolled his eyes and let out a frustrated sigh as he allowed himself to be escorted out of the room by his cousin.

Bracken started shaking with mirth once the intruders departed. “Remind me to thank Dale later,” he said. “That was highly amusing.”

Kendra smiled at him and picked the remote control back up again. “Let’s finish our movie. But I admit... I do have the same question as Seth.”

“Well... you have magic fingers,” he explained. “They don’t.”

“So it’s a fairykind thing?” she clarified.

Bracken leaned his head to the left a bit. “Eh... kind of. Let’s leave it there for now.”

She could sense that he was starting to feel a little embarrassed again, so she dropped the subject. Mostly. As she pressed play on the movie and they resumed their snuggled position from earlier, Kendra whispered to Bracken, “I’m your weakness.”

He chuckled at her comment. “Yes, you are,” he answered.

#fablehaven #brackendra #aerinm writes #fablehaven ficlet #im tired so good night #no i didnt proof read this much

26 notes · View notes

punjabaex · 7 years

Text

Apologies: Klaus x Reader

request from anon// Klaus cheating on reader with Caroline

warnings// minor language, reader feels unworthy, but fluff and angsttt! also, my first Klaus one-shot, so I'm sorry if this isn't great!

You were siting on the bed in your hotel room, staring at the dark walls. Your phone had been going off for a quite a while now. You immediately turned it off with aggressiveness. You’re quiet sobs now filled the emptiness in the room. You tried to reprocess everything that had happened in the past few hours of your life. And the reason for it all; Klaus Mikaelson. Where the name would give some shudders, to you, it gave butterflies. Klaus was this unexplainable, complex, intricate being. Everybody thought of him as this self-centered, murderous ego-maniac, but nobody knew him like you did. He was this kind, caring, and loving person, and you loved your hybrid with every piece of your heart. You had been the happiest with him, here in New Orleans. The Mikaelsons were like family to you. You were treated like a Queen by everybody, but you never took that position. You were far too self-less, compassionate, kind, and loving. And that was the exact reason Klaus loved you. You put everyones happiness ahead of yours, never put yourself above anyone, and did whatever you could to make sure that people around you were untroubled. He also loved how cheery you were. Always smiling, incredibly intelligent, being awkward, and not caring of what other cared of you. You never let your sadness be shown to the world. That was just not the light you wanted to offer people. You bottled up your feelings, and you were so good at it, faking your pain, you could’ve won an Oscar. For the past few months, you had been breaking apart. Klaus Mikaelson had broken your heart, piece by piece.. You found your boyfriend of 3 years, on top of Caroline Forbes. Although you were trying to convince yourself that Klaus couldn’t have done this, you truly knew he did. A FEW HOURS AGO: You walked in to the Mikaelsons home after shopping with Rebekah, also one of your best friends, for what seemed like hours. Rebekah had decided that she wanted to go visit Marcel, so here you were lugging in tons and tons of clothes, accessories, and other foolishness that either one of you didn’t need. You knew that today, every Mikaelsson, except Klaus, wouldn’t be home today. Elijah with Hayley, Freya and Kol, out and about, so you had the mansion to just Klaus and yourself, and you were very excited. You both did not get a lot of time alone, so whatever you had, you really did cherish. You put down the bags on the sofa, and quietly walked up the stairs to the room you and Klaus shared, ready to change out of you maxi-dress, and into some sweatpants and a tank. You could’ve sworn you heard a girl in the room with Klaus. You tried to use your vampire hearing to hear, but nothing was clear enough. You walked closer to the door, you could’ve sworn that anyone from miles away could’ve heard your heartbeat. As you peered in through the door, that was opened the slightest, tears welled up in your eyes. Klaus and Caroline were in a intimate moment. You choked on your breath, and began to walk away, ready to sprint down the stairs. But Klaus had heard you. He chased after you down the stairs, trying to slip on his clothes.  He was yelling your name. “Y/n! Love, come back, please, I am so sorry, just let me explain”. But your thoughts filled up your mind, blocking out his words. Tears were freely flowing down your face. Klaus grabbed on to your wrist, apologizing over and over again, and all you could do was stare at him. You were utterly shocked by his actions. And then it washed over you. “Let me go, Klaus. Don’t fucking touch me” you screamed, within sobs. He let go of your wrist just standing and staring now. He knew he was wrong, that he had made a mistake, that he had just lost the woman of his dreams. He had let Carolines and his old love come in the way of the woman he was going to ask to be his for the rest of his life. You walked out of the doors, you tears covering your vision straight into Kol’s arms. “What is it, darling” he asked with worry. You just buried you head further in to his chest. Crying so loudly now. “Just stay, Kol. Please, just stay”. “Don’t worry love, I got you, its going to be alright” he said as he rested his head on yours, hugging you tight. “I just want to go away, far, far, away. I need to go, now” you said, wiping your tears after a couple of minutes. “Y/n, please tell me whats up so I can help you. You do not need to go anywhere, I’m here with you”. “Klaus, he...cheated on me” your eyes welling up with tears again. You’re not gonna cry you told yourself, nope, not for him. Kol just stared at you, and engulfed you in his arms, saying kind words. “Ill come back” you said, “ I just need some time alone to rethink” “Let me come with you, y/n” “Thanks Kol, but I just need time alone, just me and my thought”. He hugged you one last time, and you left. Now here you were. In a hotel not to far away. You knew about Caroline. How much Klaus had loved her, and how much heart break he had been through when he wasn’t able to attain her love. You saw her, here and there, when you and Klaus took a little trip to visit the Salvatore brothers in Mystic Falls. The way Klaus looked at her, you knew that love was clearly existent between the two. Everybody talked about it, too. Klaus and Caroline. The tale of the two love birds. Some saying how she was dumb not to pursue him after how much he changed as a person after being around her, and other saying that she was intelligent for not going after the man. Whenever her name came up, you sulked a little on the inside. You had convinced yourself that she was far more gorgeous than you, and Klaus had every right to like her more than he liked you. But then, when Klaus had confessed his true love for you, you forgot all about her. And yet, here she was, with your boyfriend, proving yet again that Klaus would never feel the same of you, as he did of her. And that was the one thing that made you feel like utterly and completely useless. Minutes and hours passed by, and you feel asleep. Until you were woken up by someone gently pushing your hair back, you were ready to spring up and tear the person apart, but you knew the familarity of this person. Of their soft hands, and the scent of bourbon and leather. It was Klaus. And he was crying. He saw you slowly sit up, your red,tear streaked face. You looked away from him making sure not to make eye contact. “How’d you even find me” “The GPS on you phone, love” Klaus said. That damned phone, you thought to yourself Before you could even open your mouth to tell him to leave, he started to talk. “Y/n, I understand if you do not forgive me. I am truly unworthy of your love, undeserving of you. What I have done today, Ive never felt more bad about myself. I never wanted to hurt you, ever. That was one thing I told myself I never would’ve done. Caroline, and I, that was just the heat of the moment. I did not know what went over me. I didn’t mean to do it. The last thing I have ever wanted is to lose you, and when you walked out of that door, I’ve never felt a greater emptiness in my life. I have never valued your affection, warmth, and spirit more. I know that I am wrong, and trust me, I do loathe myself for it. For the man I am. In the past centuries, Ive been alone and broke, but when I was blessed with you, you healed all the sorrow in my life. I am beyond fortunate for you. I feel like the luckiest man for having you as my girlfriend, my lover, my support, and my happiness. And I know, I put a big tear in our relationship today, but I will do whatever it takes to make it up to you, to convince you that I am worthy of your love. Forgive me, darling” And a single tear fell down his face. You wiped away the tear, and pulled him into a kiss. One that meant, forgiveness, love, and new opportunities. “Klaus, what happened today, broke me in a way that I never thought it would have. You made me feel as if I was unworthy of loving, and that I was never good enough. Ive tried, tried so hard to not let the way Aurora, Camille, or Caroline looked at you. The fact that they were far more better for you, than me”. “Don’t say that. I have never loved anyone more than you. No one is as amazing as you, y/n, and it astonishes me that you don’t realize that. Your everything I’ve wanted to be, and more. And the fact that i wake up next you every morning, and that I get to call you mine, is unbelievable to this day. I promise you, with the enitirety of my heart, that I will never hurt you, ever again. I love you y/n, I love you so much”. “ I love you too Klaus, and I forgive you, but do that again, and I will surely put that White Oak stake through your heart, and drop your body at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean”. You both laughed at this, and you fell asleep in Klaus arms, till morning came.

a/n: sorry to the anon who requested, I literally procrastinated this until today, and sat and wrote in 2 hours, so sorry for any mistakes! I’m just trying to improve my writing more and more, so I'm very very sorry if this isn't great (or any of my writing isn't great lol). thanks for the support, and feel free to send something in my inbox, whether it be positive criticism, requests, or if ya just wanna talk! we are so close to 100 followers, so THANK YOU AGAIN FOR THE SUPPORT. Writing and reading here on Tumblr is something I enjoy doing. Not only is it a great de-stresser, but I get to see such talented and great human beings from all over the world :)))))))

tags: @tanjamikaelson

291 notes · View notes

kyetalksshit · 7 years

Text

GOOD EVENING!

Sorry it’s been so long since I’ve updated you, babes!

(I feel like I flip flop between babes and loves lol. Which is better? Ah, what it does it matter. HELLO.)

So ok it’s been a little while, that’s true, but I do have some updates!

Firstly, WE’VE MOVED! And it’s still not ideal, and I’m still frustrated with some things, but like mostly it’s better than the last place. Like the woman of the house here, she’s very talkative and loud and it irritates me sometimes but she’s not a bitch like Loretta (the last woman). She’s got a kid but he’s mostly very quiet and when we do see him (he spends most of the time in his room playing) he’s really sweet. It doesn’t smell amazing/isn’t the cleanest because/but there are a mILLION KITTIES. IT’S SO GREAT. I mean it can be really annoying too and again, it’s not the BEST smelling place, but! THEY’RE SO CUTE. And after awhile you really don’t notice unless it’s bad. Plus we’re keeping our window open most of the time since the central AC/heating doesn’t make a huge difference in our room as it is, and we keep our door shut partly to keep the other kitties out, and so that Dany can hide in here when she wants to. I’ve been trying to get her to go out and explore more but she’s intimidated by all the kitties. I mean she’s definitely been making progress, and I’m teaching her that when she scratches on the door I’ll let her out (I know I know I worked so hard to get her to stop at the last place but this door is already scratched tf up and Dany wasn’t listening anyway ok I just got tired of snapping at her and she’s more likely to do that than to meow at me. I don’t know how to teach her to meow at the door if she wants out) and she mostly is ok with that. I shut the door behind her when she actually exits the rest of the way, like when there’s not another cat waiting for the door to open, bc then she gets scared. I’ve left her out in the hallway for short amounts of time by now, and she’s getting braver. Very veeeerryyyyy minimally, but braver.

Also! I got to see Remi yesterday!!! She moved to Illinois back when I was still in Charlotte and I hadn’t seen her for like two years. I missed the shit out of her. Actually, it’s kind of funny because we were starting to hang out and talk a little more by the time she left but we still weren’t super close, like the most we talked was to talk shit about our shitty DM (also her ex and the “friend” who sexually assaulted me lol what a gREAT GUY) or rant about other shit, but like we’d still talk sometimes about other stuff. After she left, though, we started talking a little more? Lately we’ve been DMing on twitter every day. It may not be exactly every day, but I’m pretty sure that even on days where it’s been pretty quiet there’s been a message or two. So yeah lol the point is, we’re closer now than we were when she first left and I got to drive down to LA yesterday to go see her pretty early in the morning and I was SO EXCITED. I was a little stressed about gas but like I was not going to miss seeing her you know, and then she was rlly sweet and gave me a 20 for gas even though she isn’t working rn either and I just??? It was really nice and idk it made me a lil emotional but shh it’s ok. I wasn’t sure at first if she liked hugs, I couldn’t really remember and I don’t think I’d ever hugged her before, but I really wanted to hug her--but again, was a lil nervous bc I didn’t wanna make her feel weird, but then when we showed up she got excited and ran over to me and hugged me and idk I was v happy. I missed her a lot. We hung out and talked for two hours, and when I needed to move my car we just wound up parting ways because they had a lot of stuff to do. So we hugged again and talked about southern food and how she still says y’all and then we left and I was simultaneously v happy and v sad. We took a pic before we left, Remi, Con, and I. I wanted to be like “we should take a selfie too just the two of us” bc I like how my selfies turn out better and also idk it was the first time Con was meeting her but not me and idk, for some reason I just like... got nervous to ask for a selfie? I’m not sure why I’m like that, I feel like I LOVE taking selfies with people because it always feels like a “look at this person that I care about!!!” kind of thing but maybe because of that, I never wanna ask to take them, I just kind of hope that the other person asks? Maybe also stems from times where other people took selfies and I awkwardly stood to the side because they didn’t ask me to be in them. Wow I forget how awkward I can be in social situations. rip

Also another update, money situation is more stressful than before. Starbucks is still not transferring me, I’m hearing different reasons why from different people. Still convinced my old SM is trying to sabotage me like she has been for awhile because of me calling her out on her lies. I finally told her I was thinking of just quitting and applying as a re-hire and she was like !!! no!!! let me call one more time and give it one last shot!!! even though she had VERY CLEARLY given up and was like “idk man just call ur SM and have them figure it out bc idk what else to do” so I don’t know, hopefully she’ll do something about it this time. I got a v scary anxiety inducing phone call in which I was threatened with a cease and desist and shit because I haven’t been able to make payments on my car, and I explained the situation (without giving them an address bc tbqh idk where I’ll be living if I can’t start fucking working, and I have been filling out applications for places 45 minutes from me again because gdi I just need a fucking paycheck to sURVIVE ON) and they said I need to call as soon as I can with a specific date that I’ll be able to make a payment on. Unfortunately I ran out of phone service because I HAVEN’T BEEN MAKING MONEY so I’ll have to borrow con’s phone after hearing from my SM on monday. I’ll give them a date no matter what and just fIGURE SOMETHING OUT like I feel like even if it’s a 20 dollar payment or smth at least it’s SOMETHING you know? Ugh. Anyway. I don’t wanna think about this anymore, it’s just stressing me out. (Student loan payments are coming due too btw, so just added stress.)

BUT! I’ve been writing like a mANIAC. I’ve been working in my second novel, East Of Madness, based around my D&D OC Alyx Driftwood, and what started as an AU version of my other D&D OC Ari Dawne but turned into her own character whose name is Zvea (I don’t have a last name atm). I’m over 24.5k words already. We aren’t even quite mid November. I’M HALFWAY DONE WITH THE 50K WORD COUNT. Granted, I had like a 5k word head start bUT STILL.

Actually, remi’s part of the reason I got into such a writing streak in the first place, with all the writing talk we’d been doing. We were talking a LOT about d&d characters and somewhere along the line I just got iNSPIRED.

ANYWAY I’M EXCITED ABOUT SHIT.

ALSO I’VE BEEN FALLING ASLEEP AROUND 11:30-12ISH AND WAKING UP AROUND 7:30-8ISH AND I’M !!! IT’S SO PRODUCTIVE and ive gotten myself addicted to caffeine again making coffee every single morning AND I’M WRITING SO MUCH.

Anyway.

DAS IT FOR NOW.

LUH U GUYS <3

#blogging

0 notes

survivorelsalvador · 7 years

Text

FINALE - It Was Unnatural For Me To Have Any Moments Of Feeling Good About Myself - Richie

DANA

"It's me America, the QUEEN of winning F6 immunity and ruining everyone's plans. Thinking about how sad everyone was feeling when I won is honestly making me CACKLE.

So.. now what? Fuck everyone except Nicholas honestly. I'll be bored out of my mind if he goes home this round, so I'm not letting them happen. I won F6 immunity which is lit and means... IT'S TIME TO FIGHT without fear of what it might mean for my chances at getting further in this game.

Ashton whom? He decides to reach out to me tonight for the first time in the game. It's laughable, and honestly THE MOST™disingenuous thing someone could do at this stage in the game. This sketchy weasel pops into my pms trying to be all ~casual~

On 7/12/17, at 1:30 AM, Ashton wrote: > Hey. I can't believe we haven't talked once this whole game lol

LIKE. IT'S F6 U INSINCERE BITCH. WYD.

I can ABSOLUTELY believe we didn't talk. Let's just call it like it is Ashton, you didn't want to talk to miss me and I wasn't too hot on talking to you either. But at this point? King of inactivity is probably my best option at keeping Nicholas around, so i'll be a fake ass bitch and sell myself to him. That's fine I guess.

All I want is Lily gone and I'll plant whatever garbage lies I have to so I can make it happen. Catch me on the other side of the F6 Tribal Council though, fans. "

ASHTON

Okay I'm gonna tell you a little story about a useless goat named Ashton. He began the game on a tribe he doesn't remember the name of and swapped to another tribe he doesn't remember the name of and finally swapped to another tribe he doesn't remember the name of where he aligned with two powerhouses, Lily and Richie. Lily and Richie did everything for him, added people to the alliance, figured out who he should vote for and even kept him in the game with an idol. But Anakin turns on Obi-Wan, at some point an apprentice has to turn on their master. And for young, naive Ashton...this might be that point. Dana and Nicholas are two easy votes, this could be the time to make a move and take out the biggest player in this game, Lily...or not. Toon in later to see how it all turns out.

RICHIE

"i was so extra for zakriah's vote out smh.. dana went H A R D campaigning to me like i was impressed by her ability to talk and determination so iconic i was shook!!!! unfortunately for her our interests didnt line up at the time so what she was saying didnt work out in her favor but still damn she tried!!! she came to me saying that her/nicholas/zak had 2 vote negators and were voting out lily and how lilys such a big threat and if she makes it to the end the 3 of them are all voting for her......

so i played along and joined an alliance chat with them and i talked to dana a lot about it to the point where i told them i was with them and i said lets vote lily.. my hope was that if they thought i was with them then they wouldnt play both vote negators because i knew lily had 1 vote negator and if i convinced nicolas/zak/dana that i was with them they would have the numbers without playing both negators so that me/lily/chips/ashton would still have the majority or else if they played both it would have been a tie and gone to rocks....

i think my plan worked? i wasnt sure if they were bluffing about the double negator or what their deal was but in the end it worked out where zak played a negator and lily played a negator and i voted with my real alliance and betrayed dana/nicholas/zak and i felt bad about leading them on because it really wasnt THAT necessary but there hasnt been an idol played since i played it at the merge vote so i've been on high alert thats why we voted zak because we figured dana and nicholas would be more likely to play one (RIP ZAK IM SORRY AGAIN) but i couldnt vote out lily because shes a shield for me if i got rid of her last time i would be target #1 in final 6 and be at the bottom of the zak/nic/dana alliance so it just didnt make sense for me to flip... i dont usually lie like that and i hated doing it but it needed to be done to assure everything went down smoothly "

"dana desperately campaigns part 2: nicholas hasnt approached me once to save himself its been all dana and im still shook by how much shes trying like good for her i love it when people are here to play and dont give up she won the immnity when she needed it and doing everything she can to try and put herself in a better position next week impressive and legendary!! the only problem is its very transparent shes saying things that i know arent true shes trying to downplay her game like i str8 up told her shes going to win if shes in the end and she said ""I really… am not. I havent spoken to any of the jurors except Willow. I don’t know Austin or Josh.... like i have never spoken to them"" but i know these things aren't true because i was aligned with austin and he campaigned to keep dana and was giving her information and thats why i idoled him out and i know she talks to zak because i caught her in a lie from her campainging last week vs what she said in the tribe chat

[7/10/17, 4:07:52 PM] Dana Barry (Bouvet Island Host): i talked to zak for the first time in the game… mmmmm right after willow left

[7/10/17, 10:17:16 PM] Dana Barry (Bouvet Island Host): I have a 50 day snap streak with zakriah that I WILL NOT kill for this game so

so im sticking with my 4 of me chips lily and ashton and voting out nicholas... im hoping theres no idol and if there is an idol dana's fixation on lily will mean she goes over me "

ASHTON

I'm voting Nicholas this tribal. I wanna stay loyal to my alliance for now and that might come back to bite me but I think it's the right move. So I tell Dana that I'm not gonna be making a move with her this time and she goes full Ciera Eastin on me, "You guys are stupid, Make a move blah blah blah". Basically throwing a pity party because I'm not doing what she wants. I don't know what she expects when she has been feeding me bullshit about how she's not a jury threat when her whole fucking alliance is on the jury.

IMMUNITY LETS GO. WOO WE NEEDED THIS. BYE DANA PEACE OUT.

It all came down to this immunity challenge if Lily wins she wins the game and we need to stop that. So when Richie won the final immunity I was elated because that meant we could vote her out and actually have a shot at winning the game. It's gonna be a simple vote 3-1 Lily and she's not helping herself by coming after me. So Adios you turned on me in seconds so doesn't feel as bad to have to turn on you.

LILY

I really hate this bullshit. Richie is fake af. Bitch, I told me vote me out at 7 if you aren't taking me to the end. Fake af Richie I never would have done that to you if your ass was on the line. You are going to lose this game and I'm excited to hang this thing to chips or really switch it up and just give the win the Ashton. Proud that I won two of the challenges just wish I could have finished the job so I would finally get a chance at FTC. Really disappointed 😔

RICHIE

"well... i was going to write a confessional about how well everything has gone for me game wise... we got nicholas out then we got dana out and it was our group of 4 that ive been working with this whole time in the end and i won final immunity so i made it and it looks like me chips and ashton are going to the end together and out of us 3 i feel like i definitely played the most strategic and dominant game so i was basically prematurely celebrating my win the second immunity results came out but my .00003 seconds of self confidence faded quickly lmao which is okay because it was unnatural for me to have any moments of feeling good about myself im much more comfortable being back in a place of self loathing!!

i told lily i was voting her out because i really like her and shes so sweet and i didnt want to blindside her like i've been final juror multiple times in other games and its such a shitty position and i just wanted to tell her rather than string her along because i have immunity theres no reason to lie to her... but FUCK she's pissed and it makes sense she feels like ive betrayed her and i kinda have... i neverrrrrr made a final 3 deal with her and i was sure to always choose my words carefully about going to the end together because ive known shes a jury threat just by how likable she is and i know that ive fucked people over and in this game i havent been the most likable person so sitting next to her infront of a jury would be stupid of me but god she went off telling me that shes never going to vote for me that shes not going to be kind shes going to do everything to ruin my reputation in jury saying ""I do not respect disloyalty. I will destroy your game for this, you can't win solely on challenges. I will say and do everything in my power so you lose this game. That is your choice"" and ""You won't get my vote and I don't care what you do to try and get it. I won't ask you any questions and I will get to that jury and do what I want to ruin your game."" and a lot more.... so it sucks that i hurt her on a personal level and on a game level ive tried to do damage control and i was hoping by telling her this far ahead of the vote would give her time to decompress before going into jury pissed and have a chance to explain myself but i dont think theres any hope for that so RIP "

LILY

Chips, my favorite human? Yes.

#ididntconsent

0 notes