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#just realized i tagged wrong lol

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#warning for VERY long tags ahead lol, #so i uhhh, #trying to figure out my violent mood swings/sensitivity to getting extremely frustrated or depressed, #found an article about adhd in girls, #am doing a research deep dive and now im. wait maybe., #like im not a girl (but i grew up as one) and i knew before that adhd presented differentlh in girls but i never actually looked into it in-, #-depth., #i always thought i was the further from having adhd bc quite honestly i pay too much attention to details and i remember things? but i think, #about it and i had a HUGE problem with accidentally interrupting friends all the time and i realized i *do* spend WAY more time on homework, #than anyone i know and i remember i literally lost so much of my childhood days to daydreaming and i entirely forgot i used to do that., #i like to think i can stay focused but i realized i actually can’t. and i’ve always blamed it on an addiction to my phone but i realize, #yeah no. i literally cannot focus., #or like. i focus on entirely the wrong things (lmao youtubers), #there was a thing in one of the articles about ‘inefficient student’ and about how studying tons and tons and still getting no good grades, #is common. and that’s me . 100%. i get so so frustrated all the time because of it, #idk i dont want to self diagnose i’m just suddenly realizing maybe the things that’s wrong with me is this. it’s a possibility, #im gonna do more research and find people with similar experiences, #it’s difficult to figure out bc i’m not independent so i can’t tell if im disorganized or cant balance a checkbook or keep a schedule bc, #my parents help me do that, #but im not a child either and i can barely remember my own childhood so im not like. disruptive in class or wildly daydreaming anymore bc, #i have a phone as a distraction now, #idkidkidk, #sorry this was a longass ramble, #maybe i just need sleep hdhfh, #maybe it’s just anxiety?? hahfhsjjd DUDE IDK sure wish i had access to medical profressionals, #my rambles, #if you somehow read all of this i apologize for taking up your time and ily
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///tw hallucinations + body horror (?)

ok i am so tired that i have hit the point of hallucinating,,, and I’m fine dw!! narcolepsy just be like that sometimes it’s genuinely not a big deal and it doesn’t bother me at all, it’s kind of interesting seeing what my brain comes up with.

but like!!! if it could be less creepy stuff thatd be great!!! i rly don’t enjoy havin a dude with dead fish for hands chillin in my bedroom. it’s rly like not my first choice of people i want in my bedroom tbh.

anyway i forgot what my point to this post was bc, per my previous statement, I’m fucking SLEEPY so. have this disjointed mess of a text post thanks for existing u guys i just rly love u all 🥺

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