#okay shaking out everything

[twinkodium]

Make sure you have a footage of everything he says otherwise he’ll try to deny it later 🫣

#f2 #f1 #oscar piastri #robert shwartzman #rob got you there Osc #he remembers EVERYTHING 🤭🤭 #the defeated sign he let out when he realised it was indeed his idea #he’s so awkward but damn comfortable with rob 🥺 #singing like that and giving his all 🥹 #naw one of the highlights of the f2 season that year 🥰🥰 #dying how he’s trying to defend himself with a smile and shaking his head😂 #‘I didn’t suggest it’ #‘you did suggest it. she proved it’ Angelina pulls out the video evidence 😂😂😂 #‘fine.. maybe I did suggest it’ with the 😐 face 😂😂 #you should think before you talk Osc 😂😂😂 #‘okay done’ runs off immediately 😂

[dazais-guardian-angel]

this torture we're going through with the anime must be divine karma for slandering Bones all this time...... they said "oh, you don't like how we adapt things? you say the manga does it better?? okay then, well now there is no more manga. it's Bones or bust, bitches."

#bungou stray dogs #they really said now either you get the story from us or you don't get it at all 😭😭😭😭💀 #screaming crying throwing up shaking HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CARRY ON FOR THE NEXT WEEK LIKE EVERYTHING IS NORMAL #NOT KNOWING WHAT THE FUCK 'TWILIGHT FAREWELL' MEANS #NOT EVEN A FULL WEEK BUT FIVE DAYS CAUSE THE PV ALONE WILL END ME #seriously though how can i be okay with getting canon content for the first time in the ANIME #they already do terribly with content that ALREADY EXISTS #HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FEEL GETTING /NEW CONTENT/ THROUGH /BONES/ #i guess looking at it another way though...... i should be glad if they deliver me some fucking hope a few weeks early #like obviously i'd rather none of this have happened and have gotten to this point in the last episode in the manga first #but since it did turn out this way....... if good things happen i'll take it i can't complain at this point just GIVE ME HOPE #mexican standoff with bones now that there's (basically) no manga content left like 'so it is down to you and it is down to me' #bones at the end of the fucking bsd world: 'never thought i'd be fighting side by side with a bsd anime hater' #me: 'how about side by side with a friend?' #bones: 'aye i can do that'

[goldkirk]

I'm so proud of myself about finances in the past couple months. I still struggle with money but I did enough meditation and journaling and practicing about it to make myself able to actually face my loans and credit cards and savings and bills and start really truly organizing and addressing them for the first time in years instead of just flying by the seat of my pants.

Like. This is a huge deal for me. I've felt like I'm in deadly danger every time I've tried to think about money for years and years. I'm finally able to look it in the face and stare it down and start to organize and plan on purpose instead of just keeping up with the minimum to stay afloat. I'm so proud of myself.

It's still a refrain of "GUILT (funny link)" every time I think about money but I'm able to actually make spreadsheets and face the numbers and monthly tracking again, and even make a new full budget which I haven't been able to do in ages.

still feel guilt, overwhelm, and helplessness, but no longer feel as much deep elemental shame and terror. that's progress baby

#we don't need to talk about how many months and months of therapy visits and doctor appointments I put on credit cards #among other things #but I had to put my foot down about it a couple months ago and shout at myself a little saying HEY #I AM SHAKING YOU BY THE SHOULDERS I AM SHOUTING FOR YOU TO HEAR #OF COURSE IT WAS A TERRIBLE FINANCIAL DECISION BUT YOU WEREN'T EVEN EXPECTING TO BE ALIVE #THE CREDIT CARD DEBT WAS NECESSARY TO KEEP YOU ALIVE AND IT DID AND EVERYTHING ELSE IS WAY LESS IMPORTANT THAN THAT #why the FUCK are you feeling SO ASHAMED for making the best decision you knew how to make at the time??? #just because you know NOW that you could have tried some other options doesn't mean you did THEN #you may have known enough to feel shame and guilt yes but you would never in a million years have gotten the help you needed fast enough #by attempting to go another route #you didn't trust anyone besides a very few handfuls of people and even them it wasn't fully #and the stress of running it through parental insurance was so terrifying to you bc you didn't know what that would do #and you never had cosigners for anything your whole adult life. it's OKAY #you fucking DID YOUR BEST #YOU HAVE LEARNED. YOU HAVE MADE CHANGES. YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE BETTER #YOU WILL CONTINUE TO LEARN AND IMPROVE OVER TIME #it is not the end of the world. even the utilities sending you to debt collections etc etc #YOU ARE FIGURING IT OUT ONE PIECE AT A TIME #MORE PEOPLE ARE ASHAMED AND AFRAID OF THEIR OWN FINANCES THAN YOU THINK #if the people who fought and argued with and shamed you for considering student loans much less taking them out #had wanted you to actually be financially safer and healthier #they could have just fucking helped out or cosigned your loans or actively helped you find other solutions #instead of spending months and months telling you it was the worst decision ever and would ruin you financially for decades and such #you made the best decisions you could with the level of terror and knowledge that you had. it was enough to keep you alive. #isn't that enough? #isn't it a victory to survive?? isn't that enough?????? #god i'm cringing at sharing this but if it's been this hard for me surely at LEAST one of you has also made financial mistakes or regrets #and seeing me be honest that I fucked it all up too and it's a mess and I'm just climbing back through it as best as I can as I go #will hopefully make at least one of you feel a tiny bit less alone

[warpedpuppeteer]

I don't know if it was the audio quality or not but it's so hilarious that Eddie just goes BUCK in such a loud voice. It's giving me 'I'm so cool with my queer best friend I'm so supportive' 😭✋🏽. "You look great together" and he sounds strangled, still talking in a high pitch voice. "Have fun, stay safe!", he probably says as he grins too wide while clutching his forgotten girlfriend's hand tightly.

#idk #it's just funny to think about Eddie being extra enthusiastic to show that he supportive and is A-okay with Buck being bi #but he just makes everything awkward lol #and buck's like what are you doing #and Eddie's like supporting you! #and also I'm a huge fan of Eddie spending his entire date talking about Buck #because he actually so would #mr i learned maths from my gf #also low-key jealous eddie #he'd be like: personally i wouldn't have chosen this place for my first date #and: oh! oh no i would NOT have chose THAT wine buck doesn't even like that one much #and marisol is there like be for real right now #and he's clutching the spoon so hard his fingers are turning white as he cheerily says: tommy's a-he's a nice guy he'd be good for buck #buddie #911 abc #911 spoilers #PLS i NEED unhinged eddie trying to be supportive but also low-key jealous #and keeps doing this until someone points out what he's doing #and he's like WHY AM I LIKE THIS #and someone shakes him like: because you're in love with him! #eddie diaz #evan buckley #evan buck buckley

[lovesickeros]

I also feel old whenever I look at the newer sagau fics

nah cuz what happened..i was there for the birth of this au when it was a handful of people vibing and everyone knew like. everyone now its everywhere and im walking back into it like a year later and everything is on fire LIKE....damn im just old huh. ya'll evolved while i was gone. not that its a bad thing but im like ????? tryna navigate all the new au's and content + writers..

#asks #the-white-void #img block #i was like what. 19 when i first joined....now i can legally drink who let this happen. im OLD and CREAKY now. #shaking this fandom around in a pringles can BACK IN MY DAY- #smh they have it good now finding sagau content for what u want was so hard depending on what u were looking for #no tsaritsa takeover either smh i gotta do everything myself /j #carving out tsaritsa sagau all by myself it aint much but its honest work #thats still my brand idc im her number one fan #furina is also my brand (soon) #OKAY ill shut up abt being old now zzzzzzzzzzz #taking my creaky bones elsewhere #(to nap for 24 hours)

[crybaby-bkg]

Dabi is surprisingly a lightweight. You honestly would’ve never figured by looking at him, but as you think back on it, you’ve never really seen him drink a lot. Not when there were celebratory parties, or when things didn’t go right for him. It’s why you’re so shocked when you convince two shots into his system, why he suddenly looks so loose, why his grin splits so wide.

He’s a clinger, you’ve also learned as you’ve started observing the blue eyed man where he shoves his face into the crook of your neck. His body bends over almost uncomfortably to fit into the position, and you can’t help but flinch a little when his damp breath blows a quiet little raspberry on your flesh.

omg wait my favorite thought is of you not even necessarily being a heavyweight, you can just handle your liquor a little better than anyone expects. you love to knock back drink after drink, convince Dabi into some stupid competition that he falls for because he’s such a little nerd and secretly wants to impress you. he does it thinking you’ll be the drunk one first, the one hanging off of his arm and hopefully his dick by the end of the night.

it belatedly shocks him when it’s the exact opposite. when he’s slurring a little and smiling at you, when you watch him through low eyes with a wide grin, when he wraps himself around you like a python, when you shake his face gently as you squish his cheeks together in hand. he’s just so utterly obsessed with you in these moments, and maybe it’s the liquor in him, but he knows his lowered inhibitions are only bringing forth the feelings he’s always suppressed.

drunk sex with Dabi where he’s the one too loose limbed and limp and weak. he flops onto bed like some rag doll with his arms and legs spread wide, but he musters up enough strength to release the heavy weight of his cock from its confinements. doesn’t do much besides lift his head from the pillows with a point to his crotch and a lazy grin, an announcement of, go ahead and hop on already before he’s flopping back down again, ready to lay back and get fucked like how he knows he deserves.

#at first I wrote about him getting whisky dick and not even realizing it and being so embarrassed about it the next morning #but it made me laugh too hard and I was like #no one will enjoy that dude shut up AJSHDKDJDJD #but omg lightweight baby that can only cling to you and whine to go back to your room to fuck #only to pass out immediately on the bed lmfao #I love him I’m gonna str*ngle him so bad #anyway I finished all my work for the week and now I feel empty so I will be moving onto next weeks work tomorrow LOL NERD #but everything next week is simple too so why not get it out the way ya know???? #after that I might sit down and actually write another fic since it’s been a little minute #everyone voted for therapist obsessed bkg next but I kinda wanna write something emotional for touya now lmfao #I’m becoming so obsessed with him and it HURTS!!!!! #I can only handle one ☝🏻 at a time or else I start getting the shakes #also omg my regular dr is making me go to the heart dr bc she said my anxiety worries her for my physical condition aksjdj embarrassing #okay bye I’m gonna read a little and sleep #—new treat in the streets! 🍫 #dabi treats! 🍬 #tw: alchohol mention

[mwagneto]

any time i remember time lord victorious arc i start shaking like a sick fucking dog

#having an extraordinarily hard time watching waters of mars rn literally episode of all fucking time #they dont make them like this anyMOOOOOOOOOORE OHHMY GODDDD #icould talk abt it for hours istg it's so. grips you shakes you shakes you shakes you shakes you sh #the WAYYDYDYDHDHDJDJDJDUJDJDHDJDUDJD THHHEEEE THE THE THE . HTHHEHEH #the way u can see glimpses of what's to come in all 4 seasons but especially in voyage of the #damned and then s4 onwards but u dont realise JUST how much he went insane until now #like there's echoes of this in votd but you might not even pick up on it if you dont Know #n here he's just fully gone it's sooo. IT'S SOOOOOOOOOOO. CHARACTER OF ALL TIME #man so profoundly tragic his entire story is abt speedrunning losing everything and #going insane and dying. and yet he still spends like 20 entire minutes crying and begging not to die. okay #i cant rank drs they're my best friends so idk who my fave dr is but 10's is easily my favourite story it's so. it's SOOO. #anyway sorry. stops shaking you and pats your arms down awkwardly. carry on #doctor who #dw lb #10th doctor #the waters of mars #time lord victorious #i was today years old when i learned there's apparently a whole audio series about it that #came out in the past few years. well i aint listenin to that. everything i need is on my screen already #also. the way most ppl havent even seen these specials coz they're impossible to find online.. #even tho waters of mars is like. not just extremely important but also yknow. extremely good

[imminent-danger-came]

I saw your tag that out of the 3 monkeys, macaque is the most mentally well, and i had a mini breakdown about the fact youre right. You shouldnt be right, but you are

IT FEELS WRONG RIGHT. Like, Macaque is the red and black edgy monkey with shadow based powers, and yet he's also the only one whose positive character arc has impacted the story in an undeniably constructive way. Who knows what would have happened had he not been there to help MK in both 4x10 and the s4 special.

And like, MK on the other hand has had a negative character arc for the whole show (with "Revenge of the Spider Queen" and "The Emperors Wrath" being small hills in the road, but knowing MK we're going DOWN next season). MK is still going to get worse before he gets better (I'm predicting mega guilt over having a hand in Azure's death, but we'll see—also everything about his monkey form/himself is pretty much unresolved soooo) and don't even get me started on Wukong. He ALSO has had a negative character arc the whole show, with his main improvement being his resolve to be more open with MK. But like, between Mei chewing him out in 3x10, getting possessed by LBD, and now his time spent in the scroll—let's just say I'm worried for the Monkey King.

At the start of the show I'd say MK, SWK, and Macaque are all mentally unwell in their own special and equal ways, but Macaque actually got somewhat better (thank you 3x13). He's the only one. It's ridiculous.

#Ready for the MK and SWK spiral. I really am #Macaque still has his own issues don't get me wrong but like. Clearly he's gotten a little better if he was willing to help SWK at ALL. #MK's little “better than we found it” spiel at the end of 4x14 there has me shaking his shoulders. IT'S A LIE AND I AM WORRIED FOR HIM OKAY #I swear in MK's mind that boy is like ''Great! Now I can never use Monkey Form again! Everything can go back to normal now!'' #and boy is that not going to pan out #''Kick this can down the old half marathon'' dude. Dude killing god is a half marathon to you now. OH GOD. YOU'RE JUST NOT OKAY. #HE IS SO UNWELL #AND I THINK HE SHOULD FIGHT WUKONG ABOUT IT. #READY FOR MY s5 TRAGEDY ARC ALRIGHT #I AM #asks #lmk #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lmk MK #lmk SWK #lmk Sun Wukong #lmk Macaque #lmk analysis #lmk speculation

[whentherewerebicycles]

it's good news thank god 😭😭😭

#iui tag #last time this was the first indication that things weren't going right #because it was only a 30% increase and it needed to be 60-100% for her to think everything was normal #but this time my levels went up by 216% 😭😭😭 #i am weeping in a study room #maybe it's all going to be okay #my ultrasound is next thurs (week and a half) #i am going to try SO hard to stay in the headspace of joy during this brief window where i have no medical encounters #she mentioned that if i am feeling really anxious about the utlrasound i can have one more blood draw done in the meantime #and i think i will try to be chill but will keep that in reserve if i really need confirmation that things are going ok #but JOY JOY JOY #anyway in other news i think i might have a bit of light pregnancy loss trauma 🫠 #the degree to which i was out of my fucking mind all weekend and all day today was just uh #it was a lot #i was so sick with adrenaline i was shaking on the drive to work #but okay #just gonna #focus on the joy of right now

[opikiquu]

im going to be so annoying all week

#agghagahah HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HYYESAAHHHH #★ arin rambles #BRO BRO PLEASLE #PELASE #my apology for everyone. I have to make it now . Sorry. If youre following me destroy that notif button you dont wanna hear how worse i will #get #actually no just Unfollow entirely #ITS THE ADHD #PLEASE. HE IS SO . COOL. his trailer is so awesome IVE REWATECHED IT 3 TIME SNOW. #I LOVE HIMMMMMMM SO MUCHHHHH #I LOVE HIM SO BAD I JUST ADORE HIM PLEASE #HES SO PRETTY. JAW DROPPING. ICONIC. LIFE CHANGING. THE TEARS IN MY EYES. GENUINELY SOBBING RITHT NOW IT S SO OVER #aventurine likers hold me. Nobody understands. Everyone is scared of me im too crazy #actually its everything wrong with me . Hes ruining my life #i dont struggle as an aventurine liker i actually excel at this its my full rime job now #‘9 to 5’ no i work 9 to 9. Every hour is dedicated to him #im glad uguys agree with me thannk uou i was starting to think i was a freak #Well i am but im glad someone else agrees hes cool #Hes so pretty im so happy #I CAMT WAIT RILL WENDENSDAY PLEASE IM GONNA FREAKIFN BLOW UP #I LOVE AVENTURINE. I LOVE AVETURINE. #i get so happy when i see him i get a little violent its unsettling . #like im like shaking my hands and jumping around my room and then u blink and im bashing my head against the floor #its carpet. Im ok. But like not but i am #DUDE. I LOVE. THIS GUY. EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM #i needto. Just. Okay brb gonna watch ir like 20 more times ill see u guys next year im going into a Aventurine induced coma #this makes me realize people read my tags. Oh dear. Sorry everypony #i apologize for my behavior. I will get so much scarier. #HES SO COOL. HES ACTYALLU SO COOL. LIKE HOW CAN SOMEBODY BE SO COOL. #oh god OH LORERDRDRDDDDDDD WHEN I GET YOU BOY WHEN I FIND YOU. WATCH OUT. WATCH OUT I WILL GET YOU.

[razzle-zazzle]

Fighting the first movie tooth and nail trying to figure out how it all goes down.

I am not winning 😞

#between au #dreamworks trolls #main issue is that poppy and branch DON'T KNOW EACH OTHER prior to poppy arriving at bergentown #so the true colors scene DOESN'T WORK the way it does in canon #but i need branch to sing again dammit‚ his whole arc in this movie is taking his ''i am a BERGEN i am NOT A TROLL'' mentality #and shaking it vigorously until he comes to understand that he's both and neither and that's okay #like i know what i want for AFTER the events of the movie (pop village and bergentown as allies‚ trollstice & chef dead & gone) #but i need to know how to GET THERE IN THE CONFINES OF THE MOVIE (chef finds trolls‚ trollstice almost happens #poppy negotiates peace between their kingdoms like the girlboss she is) #just branch BEING THERE in the scene where chef shoves creek into gristle's mouth could change everything so so much #bc would creek still be yoinked and shoved into gristle's mouth??? would he still get the chance to show his true colors????? #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #possible idea is to retcon the timeline so that gristle senior is still there in the movie‚ but slowly dying from illness while his son #is acting king and falling apart under the pressure #but then i still need to figure out how the fuck poppy's role fits into that #there's just. gdmt branch why must you make everything so much more complicated #branch and his complexity addiction smh

[sssusuki]

Holy shoot, okay, Luka is NOT what I was expecting. What expecting a man who wants to die but we got the BEST CHARACTER EVER AND I LOVE HIM. He's toying with Mizi, or perhaps it's genuine, but I think it's toying with her previous performance and specifically about Sua he's touching a sensitive subject and Miso rightfully lost her shit and attacked him. I WOULD HAVE TO. It really seems he is compliant with the situation and actively toying with his opponents. Feels like he is hiding much more beneath the surface due to our first scene of him (Opening him eyes and then vehemently shutting them) in Alien Stage: Sweet Dream, and then with the Rubik cube scene at the end of Round 3. Also, with WHATEVER happened as they dragged Mizi away (Not sure if that was a hallucination or not) as well as the ending Error, I refuse to believe they murdered Mizi. With the way Hyuna also held him at knifepoint, her being in cuffs, as well as, if the first time around watching says anything, I thought it was Hyuna turning around and disguised as an alien, dragging away an unconscious (not dead) Mizi. With the way Round 5 turned out, I am easily expecting Mizi or and maybe alongside Hyuna to have a burn it all down moment. Or perhaps I just really want a resistance in Alien Stage, BUT THAT WOULD BE SO COOLSHSSBSKSHSJ. Really feel like they have something up their sleeve with Mizi in this case and we are about to see a great revival/and or transformation on her part. Also, LUKA STOP TEASING THIS IS WHY PEOPLE WANT TO KILL YOU

#My god DO I LOVE HIM #yes. a million times yes #he is a horrible man that I LOVE #easily favorite character #I WAS SURPRISED BY THE WHISTLE HE DID AT THE START AT MIZI #like. KSBKSSHKSHSKSVK?????!!!!!! #surprised it didnt cut to Till clawing on the walls and Ivan shaking his head in dissapointment. #Another thing that might be completely stretching. Ivan and Luka might be more similar than I thought. #However. while Ivan protects himself under apathy and coolness. Luka uses EVERYTHING he has to hid advantage even at extreme detriment. #they sre both hiding themselves from the audience while Till. Mizi. and even Sua put EVERYTHING out onto the stage as its their last hurray #just. something I wanted to point out. #OKAY. NOW TIME TO POINT AND LAUGH AT LITTLE BLONDE MEOW MEOW #I am SO NORMAL. I SWEAR. PLEASE DONT LOCK ME UP AGAIN I PROMISE I WONT BITE PLEASE PLEASE #alien stage #alnst #vivinos #Spoilers #Swan Speaks #qmeng #Luka Alien Stage #Luka #Mizi Alien Stage #Round 5 #swan talks

[lunart-06]

Kamukura with emotions doesn't make him weaker than before, just because he's in relationship with Makoto doesn't mean he's gone completely *soft*. He's only gone soft in just one angle, the rest is still pretty much still the same except now he perfers to rest his head on Makoto's lap than anything else that was already available for him to simply just lean his head against.

The first thing he feels when being around makoto isn't *love*, it's simply the same feeling he always felt which is *boredom*. And the second that came along wasn't the first thing mentioned, it's *interest* (from the form of the prespective of boring normalcy that differs his own) that slowly by time turned into *obsession* (realizing this whole thing is much better than when being stuck in the tight room in his lab) and by then began to be sticking around the guy instead of the other way around and it'll be a surprise to Makoto one day and to Makoto that will only be taken as an invitation to be closer. A progress.

All in all *love* will be the LAST THING appeared even AFTER they were in a relationship because it is something that Kamukura HAS to come in terms or accept himself, or realising too late to stop it cause he only accept to be "in a relationship" (with the entitlement of 'lovers' or 'partners' and everything) with Makoto simply in a way so Makoto can stay close to him (knowing the guy's unyielding loyalty and used that to his gain), because Makoto continues to make himself intriguing to Kamukura in his own boring, simple ways because Kamukura has grow to hate and berated normalcy of the untalented by his teachers and developed it through there. Plus he never gets to experience or learn a lot more of it other than the lab staffs' explanation of how "boring" it is and it's seem to also be the reason *he* became Kamukura in the first place as well.

(So the beggining of their relationship itself, the "love" part was one-sided. Kinda. In a way)

Sure it *is* boring. The whole "normal lifestyle" thing is sure sucked away his life source (if he even had one) and it's already just as he expected even when he lets Makoto around for at least a few days, he only let the guy around cause his luck is unexpected at most times but then of COURSE Makoto would use those times to shimmy his way into Kamukura's life. Shortly yet slowly. A very strange pace it is but it worked well with both of them.

His sickening optimistic, motivating nature to upbring Kamukura's gloomy, unmotivated one to pull him in the most boring of activities eventhough he had stated either directly or indirectly that those are, obviously, *boring*.

But Makoto's other traits that has first caught him just *slightly* off guard (which is. Rare and almost to never) was his undeterred determination to prove someone wrong (either in a morality sense in what was naively generally right). Perhaps he has been too assuming of Makoto's commonly pushover antics, or maybe Makoto's usual everyday and everytime genuine optimism has put his guard down just a bit that it made him passed by the fact that Makoto- no matter how positive and hopeful- *can* get mad or bothered if being triggered in certain ways. Certain ways as in if it involves someone else or views of things morally in a negative sense (the reaction made Makoto look more.. real. Something along that line).

Im also thinking how at some point, that *stubborn* determination that *always* butts in whenever Kamukura try to state or refuse. To try and always attempting to change his mind and at some point it led to another breaking point leading to the next change and that would be Kamukura- in his still usual bored tone yet out of character dialogue, said, in *annoyance*; "can you shut up." And doesn't THAT caught them BOTH off guard.

Silence followed when both were lost in their own thoughts in trying to process it before Makoto snapped out of it first to apologise for crossing the line and in promise to not do it again. Which, Kamukura is fine with but at the same time- "no" he would say, "keep talking". Cause sure, Kamukura has a fair share of being annoyed sometimes, but THIS is different, because just *how* can he be so easily annoyed over something so... *simple* as Makoto to be able to *blurted out* the moment of thought? It's something worth to explore more. To *experience*. Because it's new and when it's new, it's usually *interesting and unexpected* to someone like Kamukura.

And sometimes it's not just usually some new emotion just popped up at certain times, it's also the fact how constant it is of how the emotions he had experienced off kept *shifting*. He'd be bored then suddenly feeling intrigued in something then suddenly be slightly fluttery-ish? ('Amused' he noted) or suddenly feeling heavy in his chest ('sadness' he thought), heck, even the feeling of something clawing his insides when Makoto almost get a brick crushed his own head ('fear' he whispered to himself) then suddenly sometimes shifts back to being bored, then intrigued, then over and over in an out of order cycle. It either shift back to the same things or it develops something new.

It was never just one thing everyday just like how things are before meeting Makoto- like continuously be bored of everything and that's what makes things both overwhelming and underwhelming at the same time.

I also think that another thing that pulls Kamukura to Makoto is that just from Makoto, wanting to hang out and stick to him, to befriended him, with the payment only be *spending some time with Kamukura* and not to use him for his talents and abilities alone. Is one thing Kamukura unmanaged to just *understand* or fully grasp. In the end though he resolved by thinking that perhaps this is just a Makoto thing. That Makoto is being too good or cared too much of others in a way. But it does put Kamukura in a good "hm..." moment though.

I have a funny imagery that Kamukura just seem to be more often being put *slightly* off guard more by Makoto (wether intentionally or unintentionally which is usually the latter) than anyone else does. To which he be more on guard than he is before and to not jump to the most obvious conclusions or assumptions on some people because, of course, the Makoto situation and all. To which also means it made him statistically *more* dangerous than before (congrats Makoto! You made him more cautious or more thoughts in than usual of what was around him!).

His obsession in wanting to keep Makoto close to him by time will become apart of his own conciousness that *I* believe to be the case. Because after everything?? Everything that happened for the last few months?? Wether before or after being together (though I believe the moment they are together is the moment where the feeling became more hecticly stronger)?? It would only be obvious that he would, for once, *accidentally* (cause really, since when does being with Makoto Naegi means anything gone as planned?) Putting the obsession from wanting Naegi close because he is the first and often only source of interest for Kamukura's own bargained to wanting Makoto close because suddenly he was in too deep in the pit he had been *still* continuously dig himself in and finding that he doesn't *like* it when Makoto was out of reach.

(Going from trying to keep the guy around for selfish reasons by means to keep himself out of his usual bored state [cause let's face it, Kamukura isn't a good person, nor a bad one either, heck doesn't even attempted in search to at least *try* to quench his boredom just because he lacks any sort of motivation. But if the interesting thing were to suddenly presented dangling just in sight he WILL grab onto it tightly.], to obsessively trying to not get the guy lost out of his reach figuratively or metaphorically sense cause he *knows* that he will never *feels* something like this again, to feeling just *right* to have Makoto close to him and not letting go just because he doesn't *like* it)

I doubt Kamukura even realised the moment he had been *attached* to Makoto, simply because he had never experience emotions in the first place other than just knowing the basic theories to diagnose others in. And when he did, it's too late by then (it won't be him unable to escape Makoto. No, no, on the contrary, Makoto will be unable to escape *him*).

So anyways. Love isn't the priority to Kamukura since the very beggining in the start of their relationship, because the other foreign subjects that is emotions (twinging sadness, light amusement, flickering annoyance, poisonous jealousy, and dare he not admit the clawing fear) *are* the foundations that build his own *version* of what was the concept of 'Love' is.

Love is different to everyone afterall, so far what Kamukura has learned and see, if there was anything the same about all of it is that; love is a form of passion, and the connection of the bonds, it can be different from others, but Kamukura *doesn't* feel anything a lot WITH anyone else in general more than he is with Makoto. So essentially to him, it was different. It's not love that was viewed *generally* but it was his own version nonetheless.

This is just *my* insight of how I see Kamuegi *in* Kamukura's prespective. Cause he is my favorite character to write. You can do so many things to him in certain situations no matter how impossible it seem to try and not break his character. But that's the thing. You NEED to break certain characters, but as long as you didn't break the fundamental core of their characters then trust me, it's more of a scratch or a rather small crack on a ceramic vase than it looking all smashed up.

Sometimes you GOTTA make a scratch or heck, added something on it, without it losing it's shape or material as a ceramic vase, in order to make it slightly more jazzam get it? Or to make it work for the theme of the room you placed it in. (Not me using the vase metaphor for all of this)

#another funny imagery is that since Kamukura lacked human touch #makoto showing the wonders of doing cuddles #wrapping his arms around his back and everything #kinda like snuggling. screw it he *is* technically snuggling the guy #rubbing his head and face against the other's chest cause might as well enjoying it too in the meantime #and *this* is different than just a small pat and quick hug #that this isn't just some skin and skin contact with one another #there was something else behind this that he can't really point out to #cause duh it involves something as foreign (still) as *feelings* #this is one of the “overwhelming and underwhelming” moment for Kamukura #and it is more sided to overwhelming but in a positive sense (probably) #well whatever it is. Makoto felt the other's body suddenly shaking ever so slightly as the arms wrapped around him #“uhh Kamukura. you okay..?” #“you're kinda shaky..” and it *is* a little concerning for someone like Kamukura #but rest assured when he tilted his head a bit to look up #he can't really see Kamukura's face since the guy placed his chin on the heair below him #and was looking away to the side. but he can see how tense the posture is a bit #he was about to pull away cause he thought he overstep the other's boundaries or smth #but rest assured once again when Kamukura wrapped those now more slightly composed shaking arms tight around Naegi #and he subtly noticed the slight red ears that was left uncover from the black strands #and all Makoto can do is just sighs in worry bht relieved smile and buried much closer to the other without a word #and they stayed like that for probably halfway from the day #now it's one of the only thing in Kamukura's “favorite” list now Makoto gotta bare with it #it's a win-win cause then Kamukura can keep Makoto close. metaporically AND *literally* #danganronpa #makoto naegi #izuru kamukura #kamuegi #lunardr thoughts

[altairring]

it's officially hallmark christmas movie season in my country which means im getting ads for them everywhere. which made me remember my hilarious revelation from last year that silvio / emma / rio can be fit almost perfectly into the 'rich and kind of asshole big city boyfriend'/'career driven but kind and independent woman'/ 'small town sweetheart' christmas movie archetypes

to be completely honest, the only christmas movie i know by heart is the first two Home Alone movies HAHA

bUT YOU ARE CORRECT!! those archetypes fit them so well and you got me freaking daydreaming about it the moment i saw this in my inbox.

particularly...rioemma

oh, you made my brain rot fURTHERRRR. but i shan't. ill keep my mouth shut.

silvio / emma / rio is a good trio for me. i like thinking about them ...be it their relationship purely platonic/familial. or one of the riccis got together with emma. their dynamic is just too good...

hihi, if they're in a typical Christmas movie. i would watch it.

#emma was busy fulfilling her dreams. it was tiring but she kept herself optimistic #rio making the best out of everything making his life dull and repetitive #they met when the snow was falling. it was a meet-cute. she slipped on a patch of ice that she didnt notice. he caught her. #she apologized and he told her it was okay. they small talk. that small talk became huge. big and got longer than it was intended. #they exchanged contacts and became friends #they talked through their socials...they talked about how the holidays leave them with an empty feeling... #joked abt spending it together #(plot twist: it was NOT a joke) #[insert them becoming closer and closer. their friendship flourishing. trusting each other the most than anyone else in their lives] #rio. whose life became brighter and full of color because of her. #emma. who found comfort in him. where she could let herself be tired and real in front of him. #*clenches fist* #[insert slow-burn romance. with tons of pining yearning and dreaming.] #it took a lot of time but they kissed. after years. while the snow was falling. #their lips warm. emma clutching his coat. rio holding her tightly by the waist. snowflakes melting on their cheeks and eyelashes #i am blabbering #what have you done to me. #my demirose/demian heart is shaking #alt rambles #alts inbox

[palmtreepalmtree]

You really don't know what noises your house is capable of making until you've been sitting in a gusty rainstorm for 24 hours, hunh?

#how do you people live with weather? #do you have everything lashed down like you're on an 18th century sailing vessel? #the patio furniture is destroyed #there's a weird noise every time there's a giant gust #i swear i can feel the house shaking #california people okay out there? #had to run out there and try to find some way to secure the back gate

[emkini]

Ahhh yes. Spring and early summer. The bees are buzzing (terrifying), the flowers are blooming (I can’t go outside without a hazmat suit), the sun is shining (let’s not get sent to the ER for heatstroke this year), the spiders and insects are emerging (oh god someone save me from this fucking hellscape)

#I HATE EVERYTHING #my entire body starts shaking of its own volition when I try to get off my bed because it feels like the floor is made of spiders #every time I see any sort of speck out of the corner of my eye I have a full panic reaction #nothing will be okay again until fall #nevermind em