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spookytastemakercolor · 1 year

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CANNIBAL DAD

Dad! Bob x Baby/Kid/teen! Reader

Yes I have become a part of the Bob simps, BUT THIS IS NOT A FANFIC! No, THIS is Mista' Bob Velseb as a dad! Cause who doesn't want him as a dad? I know you heathens like me want him as a DA-, Ahem. Sorry for that. Anyway onto the post and enjoy! As a FYI some things may not be cannon.

Warning: Cannibalism, gore, mention of murder/killing, Abandonment, Cursing, Mentions of being drunk, Mention of trying to feed off of Bob (Don't.), Used as bait, knifes, bones, kid behavior but more unhinged

BOB VELSED

To say the least you're mother never even wanted you after getting drunk and sleeping with a notorious cannibal killer that was loose after he tried killing her one night.

Bob found out he had a kid when she just left you at the front door of his hideout in the winter with a simple note saying, " Here's your kid, I don't give a shit if you eat them or not but I'm not keeping them. " ( She didn't live long after that)

Definitely didn't know WTF to do once he got you inside (Man was not prepared). He stood in his living room holding you for about a hour debating whether to eat you or not.

Once you started to try and grab his sweater he decided to keep you and raise you, even if he was on the run or not you are his little ball of sunshine!

He sat on his slightly disheveled couch for about a hour trying to think of what to do. Sure he'd had one night stands before getting caught but THIS! This wasn't something he would have ever expected to happen as he looked down to the small infant wrapped in his sweater to keep them from the winter cold. He had just got back from killing that cursed woman who left you out in the cold but now he had no idea what to do, he was stuck between eating you or not.

Finally he decided to just eat you and as he went for his knife something snatched his 2nd sweater, he froze as his head slowly looked down at the small hands closed down on it as if asking to be held up closer to him. Slowly but surely he lifted you up and held you with one arm as his claw like hand went to grab your hands, you gave small coo's and babbles as you played with his fingers. He knew then and there he wouldn't let the world take you away from him.

Robbed a convenient store 5 hours after he realized he needs to get you food and supplies when you tried latching onto him. (Headlines were fucking CHAOTIC with the pictures and tape!)

Definitely experienced with some baby care knowledge. I will die on this hill.

Since he's on the run the house isn't in the BEST conditions. . . . . But he makes due with what he has and knows he can keep you warm through the winter!

He doesn't know how to handle you crying so he usually keeps a victim alive for help until eventually killing and cooking them. Can't have anyone see him be a softy

You're toys and chew toys consistent of bones, anything he steals off victims, his horns (Yes. He gives you the horns.) Any and all clothes, blankets, and victim hand's (Don't question how it stays fresh. . . .)

The girl kept screaming for bob to let her go as he made his way to his hideout, he was slightly running since he had gone out pretty far in the woods and was worried you had hurt yourself. He opened the door and could hear the little screams of his ball of sunshine, " I-Is that a baby? Oh god please don't hur- " " Quiet! Now I need ya' help and your gonna' help me or else I take ya' eyes and SHOVE 'em down your throat! "

Bob dragged her closer to the screaming as they entered and saw a little baracade of blankets with you in the middle screaming and crying. He let go of the girl and gently picked you up while turning to the girl slightly panicked " They been cryin' for 6 hours now and I can't find what's wrong, Now help me so they can stop! " she made her way towards you and held you close as they started to try and calm you down, which proved difficult from bob death staring them.

Slowly but surely you calmed down and looked up at the girl " Th-There we go, just tired aren't you? " she slowly rocked you back and forth to sleep as bob loosened up before taking you back and mimicking her movement while talking to you. She slowly made her way out of the door and bolted for the front door ' Finally! Freedo- ' it was short lived as they were yanked back by their hair and had their mouth covered " Now where do you think yer' goin'? I can't have you living after what you saw. . . . " she screamed, but being muffled, as bob dragged her to the basement.

As you grow older into the time frame of crawling or walking he had to start buildin' baracades!

Man saw you crawling for the first time and was starstruck! Until he noticed his knife hanging a LITTLE too close to the edge. Baracade numbro 1!

Now seeing as you are the child of a man who most definitely has ties to a certain cult and is definitely non-human in some way can he REALLY be surprised the first time you crawled on the ceiling and were over him while he tried to sleep?

Yeeeaaahhhh wall crawling? Be glad you haven't been stabbed or accidentally thrown when you fall off at random points

In total there are 13 baracades and 5 wall crawling stoppers (He got proper baby proofing materials later down the road, don't worry)

Ontop of the wall crawling is the, and in order of how he found out about them, Glowing eyes, Locking your jaw on anything that's flesh (R.I.P finger's from the chew toy) sounds like a demon escaping everytime you cry, demonic animal noises, and then finally you having surprisingly sharp teeth!

Bob held a camera as he set it up while setting you across the room " Ok, Come to papa! " you looked at him dumbfounded for a minute before starting to attempt to make your way towards him " That's it! Ya' can do it! " finally you started to crawling and his eyes got star's in them " There you go! Come on! " you were about half way before the lights went out and both your eyes started to glow " Oh shi- " before he could finish he heard you on the walls making those demonic noises that stuck in his nightmares " SHI-SHOOT! WHERE'D I PUT THE NET!!!! " he grabbed the little net bed as he tried finding you on the wall's.

" (N/N) WHERE ARE YA'! COME OUT FOR PAPA! " he went for the kitchen first until he heard you crawling on the ground in the living room then on a wall again, he went from room to room with you one step ahead of him until finally he decided to return on the power and look for you. " There now I can- " he covered his ears at the screech you let out from your guys room

' NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo!!!! ' he slammed open the door expecting to find blood from you getting his knife but instead found a broken bone and slightly chipped tooth. He let out a sigh of relief before cradling you and trying to calm you down ' I really gotta' get 'em some soft chew toys. . . . '

When you got to the stage of being able to speak and stand he is the type of man to try and make you say Dada but instead you say Mama. Also becomes VERY protective and cautious once you start walking.

Around this time he'll try to hunt more since when you were a baby he couldn't leave you alone so he was limited to hunt around him instead of far out. Also will refuse to take you with him no matter how big of puppy dog eyes you give him.

Never excluded sneaking out and following him when he didn't take you!

It was 8:00 and bob had finished getting his hair slicked back and painting his face, you were put to bed and should be asleep by now. He had been hungry for about 4 weeks now but can you really blame him? He had to take care of his little ray of sunshine that's you! " * Sigh * Finally, I can go out and get me some meat. Don't need to worry about littl' (Y/N) tryin ta' come along eitha' " He made his way out the front door not noticing two glowing eyes watching on the ceiling or hearing the little demonic giggle that came out of you while following after Bob.

------Time skip------

Bob pinned his victim onto the wall while digging his knife as far as he could into their abdomen while letting out a holler of laughter. " HAHAHA HAHAHA!!!!!! Oh how I've MISSED this! " he pulled the knife out as the victim sprayed blood from his mouth onto his clawed hand, they dropped limp as Bob released them to the ground before pressing his knee down into the wound while placing his knife into their neck. " Did you know- "

" MAMA! "

" W-Wha- " before the victim had more of a chance to speak bob squeezed their throat to make them pass out before turning to their littl' sunshine who ran up to him while making grabby hands " Mama mama!!!! Up up! " he picked you up with a big and slightly concerned smile, " Now how did you get here littl' lamb! " he could be mad another time. Rn, he just needs to take you home and bring the body with him " Mama, can I help? " bob was caught off guard but slowly he gave you a soft smile " Of course ya' can, just help papa with the body. " " MAMA! " he would have to find a way to break you out of the ' mama ' thing eventually, all that mattered at the moment was getting home and avoiding the approaching police.

He tries and take you out with him on peaceful walks and sometimes hunting since you will also most likely pick up cannibalism from bob and have his more sadistic traits, but you can cover them well like him too.

Since you now talk and walk he of course brings you little trinkets and gives you you're own room if you want one! If you don't he will build shelves from already broken ones or steal one for all your little gifts and finds. ( Has a secret compartment in his sweater where he keeps your drawings for himself 🤭)

He let's you keep whatever you want from a hunt and if you want something from a store he'll make sure to dress you up and wear a disguise so you can go shopping.

He also tries his best to pick up on sewing and knitting for you and himself. He remembered how much you loved watching people make things but never brought it up because you were so shy about it, so he surprised you with a semi wearable scarf! Since then he's been trying to do more but still needs practice.

You were waiting at the door for bob to show up again, you sadly couldn't got hunting with him but he promised to bring you back something special! Slowly you were loosing the battle of sleep until the door opened " Mama! " you never let him live the name down as you tried to jump up on him " Hey! How'd my little hell spawn hold up da' fort? " you straighten up while saluting to him " Guarded and secure! I even caught you a present! " you ran off to bring your gift over as bob set the multiple bags down on the fixed dinning table.

As you came back bob was slightly shocked to see the heavily bleeding and unconscious person you dragged along with you " I saw them in the woods lining the house and they tried to break in! " bob let a smile adorn his face, on that didn't look so crazy and forced, before picking you up and spinning you around as you giggled " Hahah! That's my girl/boy! " he set you down in a chair before pushing the bags towards you " Now you remember how I was gonna give you something special? Weeelllll I noticed you eyein' a few things in the store that you didn't grab sooooo- "

He didn't finish before you tore into the bags and started making excited demonic animal noises " Mama! Thank you! " you lunge to bob as he caught you and returned the hug " Anythin' for you my littl' sunshine. Now, how about I start dinner'? " " Yay! Dinner! "

Getting about 5-8 years old he allows you to venture out on your own but not to far to where he can't find you, but still you get to explore none the less. Of course you bring back things you find to bob which he cherishes with his life and makes sure to get you something back.

Buuuttttt your also a little rebel so you usually decide to go a LITTLE farther than allowed without him knowing.

This is also how you come across skid and pump one of the days you get lost and Bob's loosing his shit trying to find you and telling himself you're alright

Of course you make friends with the two and when you tell bob he is in a bit of a crossroad considering he tried EATING them last Halloween, But their your friends and he'll accept it eventually!

Are they allowed at the house? HELL NO! (Still sneak 'em in tho)

When he has a re encounter with the four people from last year because you were waving goodbye at the edge of the woods and he popped up to scold you for going out so far until seeing the four across the street. Cue awkward silence

Bob saw you waving towards the sidewalk across the forest and came up behind you with a worried but angry look " (Y/N) (M/N) Velseb. What are you doing out here? " " Mama! I was waving goodbye to my friends! " Bob turned to the sidewalk and froze as he saw the two familiar pumpkin and skeleton kid with two concerned parents. " Mama, can they come over for a play date PLEEEAASSSEEEEE!!!!!!!! " bob looked down at you with the biggest puppy dog eyes he could have imagined and felt his heart tighten as he looked back and forth between you and the others, finally he let out a sigh while looking at you " Fine. They can come but ONLY if you agree to tell me when to expect guest. Got it? " " Mhm Mhm! I got it! "

bob let out a tired sigh as you turned to tell skid and pump they could go over before happily climbing up to sit on his shoulders as you headed back leaving two very confused Lila and jaune behind with skid and pump feeling excited to have a new friend.

Now as I said, rebellious kid. Meaning you have gone into town which results in you getting both almost kidnapped by frank and having some very scary encounters with others.

Roy is a perfect example! Your first interaction was scary as shit for all of them cause you decide to pull the same did you know your old man pulled on them! Doesn't help you also have a Southern accent like him with a more deranged smile. Safe to say he don't wanna try shit with you

Other interactions that were tense at first are Frank, had tried bribing skid and pump with candy and you pulled off a head tilt with a smile which sent him driving, Dexter, you had met him when bob grounded you and he tried coming in through the front door, the cult, they had no clue of any ties between you and bob so they thought it was a good idea to try kidnapping you! Fucking. Not. Never came back to the house, and finally! Jack and john, you can use your imagination 🙃

Now of course once Jack and John find out you two are blood related (after you went to the police station because you lost bob on one of your hunts) they use you as bait every chance they get! Doesn't work out well though 🙂

You were currently sitting in a cell scared out of your mind and making the most eardrum bursting screeching anyone can imagine as you try to clue bob where you are. " Jesus! How the hell did that phsyco get laid and have this thing birthed! " John complained as you stopped and threw one of the pieces of the destroyed cell bed at him, he quickly ducked as you start giggling uncontrollably " That's not important! What is is that he shows up to try and get them out so we can catch him. " you started to actually loose your breath as you finally looked at the two with tears in your eyes while speaking " You can't catch mama! He's just gonna escape! "

You stopped laughing as the power went out and your eyes glowed as you started jumping up and down " Mama's here mama's here! " both men drew their guns as the turned on their flashlights trying to find him " Jack, get to the breaker box and turn on the- " before John could continue he was thrown across the room as Jack turned his gun and flashlight towards him, and oh BOY was bob pissed. He was in his signature costume drenched in blood and guts from what the flashlight showed.

" Did you know? " his voice was strained as his glowing eyes turned to jack before he was being held up by a claw around his throat " That you neva' fuck with a man who would do anythin' for his KID. " he blocked off more of Jack's airway before feeling a bullet got through his chest and hit Jack in the leg " MAMA! " you panicked slightly as you watch bob drop Jack and face towards the cowering John while smiling more pissed than ever " I'm alright sunshine! Just close yer' eyes and ears for me, well be home soon. " you followed his instructions as he lunged at John more determined than every to rip him piece by piece for putting you in a cell and trying to use you as bait.

This next section is for girl things, I'll do one for the boys but girls gotta be done first so I can get it out of the way

You have now entered teen years (11-18, sorry if you disagree) and guess what? You now have a period! Yaaaaayyyyyyyy........ Yeah god have mercy on anyone who hears the screams of demonic pain in the woods or enters the woods.

Bob has no experience whatsoever ever dealing with this subject so he is going to probably be the equivalent of a new dad panicking that his wife/girlfriend went into labor.

Tell him exactly what you need or this man will pop back up at the house with a human sacrifice ready for you to consume if it means he's safe from your wrath.

Be thankful he never dropped his sewing and knitting hobby cause you getting custom shit if it's certified help material

Bob had been pacing back and forth as he tried to think of how to help you as you were currently curled into a ball on his bed with blood all over your legs. He knew this day would come but he didn't think like this! Slowly you started to groan again as bob heard the slight clicks in it " Ok bob, what do you remember your ma' telling you and how ta' handle it. " he perked up when he thought he heard meat painfully came out of your mouth " Ok, I'll be back sunshine. Just stay tight and I'll bring ya' somethin' to help. " he exited the house now on a mission.

------Time skip------

You had been waiting for bob for about a hour now, the pain wasn't there anymore so you found it easy to shower and go about trying to stop the blood from getting everywhere. " I wonder why dad's taking so long..... " you chuckled slightly as you remember how you'd always say " mama " instead, just then the door opened with bob having a giant bag in his mouth while dragging a body behind him. He set the bag down before placing, who you recognize as a cashier, on the table.

" Ok I got whatever I could possibly think of before the police arrived and took me to a cell. " bob started pulling out all sorts of materials to help you before turning to look at you to see you facing the body " Dad, why did you bring a cashier? I thought we had enough meat? " he picked up the cashier before turning to you with a smile " For a offering so you don't kill me of course! " you almost laughed before composing yourself and looking at bob " Dad I don't need a sacrifice! Why in the world would you think I need a sacrifice???? " he scratched the back of his neck as you face palmed yourself not believing what was happening right now. " It's the thought that counts dad " you gave bob a hug as he hugged you back before turning to the now conscious cashier and punching them unconscious.

Hormones is 100% something he can't help you with even if he tried, but he's 100% gonna be your gossip buddy and do runway modeling for you if you pick up a habit of designing clothes or do things to help in anything you pick up (I can't help but imagine him striking a pose with duck lips as you laugh your ass off at his attempt at looking hot in a dress you made)

Having " The Talk " has got to be the only other time you've seen him visibly have to take more mental breaks than when he told you about cursing. Man was praying you'd stay little forever

He makes sure you drink your setting boundaries and respecting people who respect you juice 👏! (If you a Top he's gonna give you the finest gentleman juices in👏the👏world👏!)

One thing that's a constant he tells you is that no matter who or what you want to date he's gonna be happy as long as you are, so long as they pass his test! Also tells you if you do a secret relationship you better make it worth keeping it from your old man! And if they do something to hurt you or they weren't worth it YOU will be able to get all the revenge you want!

He really is just that dad who may not know anything about what happens when a girl matures but will happily try his best ever thought he knows absolutely nothing. Just don't bring up people drama cause you both gonna go and kill that person for dinner.

Bob heard the house door slam and saw you running up the stairs mumbling nope under your breath on repeat and red faced. He set down his book and glasses as he made his way up to your room that he gave you once you become 11, hearing you pacing and panicking made him slightly jog up and knock on your door as softly as he could. " Littl' lamb? Are you alright? Ya' ran up the stairs and were kinda' red. " " I-I'm fine dad! Nothing's wrong! " Bob was about to say alright but then something struck him like a hammer as he realized what was going on ' Right, she probably has a crush or her hormones must be going crazy. ' he opened the door as you stopped pacing and looked at him with some slight panic but tried to play cool as you smiled at him

" (F/N). I think it's time I talked to you about something. " you visibly tense as you sit on your bed while bob sits to your right " What do you need to talk about? " bob could see how tense you were before letting out a sigh and placing his hand on your shoulder " Listen kid, I know it might be hard now with all ya' hormones and feelings going haywire right now but, no matter what I'll always give ya' the same love I give ya' now. "

It was confusing to understand what bob was saying but you guessed you got it " Thanks dad? " that's when bob put on a smile before getting serious " But just so you know, if anyone hurts ya' or don't pass my test I ain't hesitatin' to kill 'em. And make a secret relationship' worth it! " finally you got what he was saying before and start laughing while bob tried to stay composed " I mean it! And make sure to get me some grandkids! " you laughed harder as bob slowly joined in.

Finally you both calm down and you give bob a hug as he wrapped his arms around you " Thanks dad. . . " " Anytime sweety'. "

Ok now that I've ran out of ideas for the girls it time for the boyz!!!!!!

First and foremost he is 10000% more prepared for this than anything for a daughter, I mean he had to go through this as well!

Boners and stuff of that nature is the easiest talk he's ever had to talk to you about. Man probably will give you the secret holy grail of how to hide a boner in any type of pants in this world

He still has the sewing and knitting hobby and I see him just crafting shit every teen boy would need to survive teen years. (ESPECIALLY if you get achne!)

He also gotta show you the groom my friends 🤌

It was around 10:00 and bob was on the verge of passing out from watching Kitchen Nightmares

(Fight me but he definitely watches it)

Until the scream of his son woke him up and had him running upstairs. He slammed open your rooms door as he searched around to find you sitting with the blanket over your head " (M/N)! Is everythin' alright!?!?!?!? " He made his way towards you and tried pulling down the blanket but you retracted and pulled it further on " Yup! Just a nightmare! " now bob knew this to be a lie so he had to think for a minute until remembering how old you were now.

" Son, pull the blanket off yer' face. It can't be as bad as some of the victums' I've seen. " Slowly but surely you pulled the blanket down to your shoulders as bob sighed with a slight smile on his face making his way towards you " Son I know you probably already know what's happenin' and I know this is probably scary but it's not as bad as it could be! " knowing how embarrassing but comforting this would be he pulled out a photo and handed it to you. " No way. Is that- " " Yup! That's my' freshman year picture. . . . " It showed a much younger bob with much longer hair than what he has now, slightly skinnier but still chubby body, and OMG he had a punk phase.

(YUP!, I feel like starting shit and just like with Kitchen Nightmares you can fight me because I'll die on these hills!)

But the one thing that had you in shock was to achne that lightly went all over his face " Go on, get it out yer' system! " and get it out of your system you did. When you finally calmed down as bob re-took his very much embarrassing high school photo, you look up at bob as you sideways hug with a smile on your face " Thanks dad, you really are the best dad someone could ask for. " Bob smiled as he hugged you back to the best of his abilities " Anytime. Now I gotta show ya' some tricks I learned for groomin'! "

Now, same rules apply with hormones. He may be able to give advice but he's not going to be fully there. Also applies with the interests, he will play basketball like he's 19 again until his leg gives out and your now trying to get him in the house so you can have him sleep like he's 80.

" The Talk " was so weird for you because he was bringing shit up that you ain't never fucking image goes with puberty. He just got no filter between what is happening simplified and what's happening with too much detail!

You getting your respect women juice and your gonna get your beat anybody's ass if they disrespectful juice! Man raising a gentleman! (If your a bottom he's gonna make sure your a power bottom, Mama don't raise someone who don't say what they want)

Dating rules and secret relationship rules still apply along with the revenge. This man is VERY supportive

He's all and all better at handling a boy than he is at handling a girl because this man is one of the most unprepared people possible for a daughter than you can ever imagine.

Bob had set down some plates as he made his way up to your room knowing you would have sneaked into the window to avoid him, but can you blame him? He's gotta worry when you have a temper that's almost got you and sometimes him caught (But he's proud). Getting to your door he heard you throwing things around the room while talking to yourself. He knocked as loud as he could which caused the room to go silent. " (M/N)! I'm coming in the room! " " Dad NO! "

Bob opened the door to a absolute mess, everything was thrown about or some destroyed as you stood in the middle gripping at your hair " (M/N)! WHAT'S WRONG!?!?!? " Bob ran to you, grabbing your shoulders and turning you towards him. You froze and went stiff as you started to well up tears " N-Nothing I just- I- " bob wrapped you in a tight hug as he tried to calm you down while you cried, calming down bob looked at you again and asked what was wrong. Letting out a sigh you looked away from him " I. . . . . I got a crush...... "

Bob got a smile on his face as he let you go and put his hands on his hips " Well who's the lucky gal'! " You rubbed your arm feeling nervous as bob looked confused, then he slightly went wide eyed as he let out a sigh putting his hand on your shoulder " Son. Listen. " you tensed up expecting the worst " I don't care who ya' love or what ya' love. Your still my kid. I'll be there for ya' no matter what. Just know if they dare hurt ya' anyway possible or don't fly with me I'm killing 'em. "

You smile as he hugged you, slowly returning the hug and looking up at him " Thanks dad...... " " Of course, just get me some grandbabies! " you laughed while going red as bob joined in with you before letting you go " Now, tell me about the boy who got my littl' devil's heart! "

Now gender neutral teenage stuff because I've got what needed to be divided slightly (Of course it's gonna be short so I can end my misery because my fingers hurting)

Kidnapping and going out hunting is going to be the most common things to happen.

Bob doesn't always go to your rescue every time though cause you handle yourself pretty well sometimes, RIP Jack and John's goddamn wallets from the hospital trips 💀

You honestly just get alot more freedom than expected but he still worries so you always gotta keep him updated every 6 hours

Bringing anybody home you like so he can meet them or a photo is a MUST. Don't want them getting accidentally killed!!!! Although it might sometimes be on purpose......

I imagine him starting to get you to be more social and him also trying as well while also being in disguise (I realized I forgot to mention this but bob will age just not as quick as you think he will)

You both walked down the park path making jokes and enjoying some quality time before night, since bob or you both would leave on your own seperate hunts. Sitting on a nearby bench bob gave you a tired lazy smile as he tried to catch his breath " I told you the hoodie was a bad idea. Besides nobody's here! " you opened your arms to make a point as bob let out a breathy laugh " I know kid, but I ain't as yong' as I used to be. I'm almost 100 you know? " you rolled your eyes at Bob's over exaggeration before sitting next to him " Lies. You look like your in your 60's. "

" Oh really? " bob looked at you before narrowing his eyes " How old do ya' think I was when you were a kid? " you crossed your arms as you looked at him " 34 " bob gave you a smile before leaning back on the bench " Wrong kid, 61. " you sprang up from your spot and got in front of him " WHAT!?!?!? How are you just now getting streaks of gray in your hair!?!?!? "

Bob let out a short laugh before looking back up at you " Have ya' ever wondered why ya' can do what you can do? " " Yes but I ju- " then it clicked " You were a cult member!?!?!?!? " bob stood back up again before giving you a smile and walking into the woods " It's almost night. We betta' head back. " you stood in stunned silence before quickly running up to bob sputtering on your words " HOW CAN YOU BRUSH THIS OFF!?!?!?!? "

Now to the faithful day somebody steals his baby's heart! Aka the day he becomes the most hardest man to please when you try dating someone.

Partners are a VERY hard thing to come across when you are the daughter of a notorious killer and killer yourself, plus the police and everything doesn't help either.

So saying you ACTUALLY found someone who isn't trying to collect some sort of bounty or apart of the cult he is V E R Y on guard. The first interaction feels like a stand off in the wild west between the two.

Now of course he'll want to know how you met up, so for your sake and theirs lie. Say you met in the park or somewhere instead of the truth which is you saw them on a killing spree and they saw you.

Staying for dinner is like a spin the wheel for how you will compromise dinner with bob. Human meat is DEFINITELY off the table so finding a substitute is key to them actually staying.

Overall this man ain't gonna chill until he's certain they can be trusted

The air in the room was heavy and felt like a snake, almost ready to tear out the poor boy/girl next to you who had a all cheery look. Bob sat across from you two and was silently death glaring them while you tried to think of a way to defuse the situation " Dad, this is (R/N). There my Boyfriend/Girlfriend. " bob looked at you briefly before looking back at the boy/girl next to you " So, (R/N). How did ya' meet my daughter/son/kid? " he was trying to scare the kid in hopes he'd give bob a reason to gut them on the living room floor.

" Oh! I had met them one night when taking a stroll around the park, they were alone and I was curious so I introduced myself and the rest is good memories. " you could hear the imaginary hammer hit one nail into a coffin with their name on it as you decide to quickly chime in to stop another one being hammered " It was after I left to hang out with Skid and Pump! It was beautiful outside and I didn't want to head home just yet. We hanged out for a while until I headed back and we just kept meeting up there. " That's when Bob's eyes got a sadistic look before he started rapid firing questions at your boyfriend/girlfriend.

" How often would they stay at your house? "

" Sometimes for 2 day's. "

THUMP. 2 nails

" How did ya' know where to meet up? "

" They would text me when and where before 6. "

" How did ya' already know where we live? "

" I've been inside before "

4. Bod started going for his knife.

" Do you know what we do for a livin'? "

" I've been told "

5. You kept your hand stead on your own knife.

" Do ya' know who I am? "

" Bob velseb. Wanted serial killer and cannibal. "

6. Bob started drooling as he prepared to stab him.

" And tell me young' man/woman. Where exactly do ya' work? "

" The butcher shop right by your old restaurant! "

Bob smiled and looked towards you " They can stay fer' dinner! " you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding as you hugged bob with a goofy smile before turning around and saying " Welcome to the family! "

FINALLY!!!!!!! FUCKING. FINISHED. This has been in my drafts since 2022 and I have poured way too much energy into this that I'm about to cry in joy for finishing.

Anyway I hope you enjoy this read and that it isn't disappointing for how long this has taken me. Request are open and pinned with all my rules and such if you want to request something. BYE!!!!!

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ponys-girl · 4 months

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Dally punks Ponyboy

so based off of a thing I saw where pony gets Darry to punk anyone who annoys him or his brothers.

dally and pony were just messing around at the drive in when a similar scenario of what happened to cherry happens to another girl and dally is the source. the girl is telling him to buzz off, but he's Dallas Winston, who is she to tell him what to do? well, pony pulls a Johnny and tells dally to knock it off. so, pony not being the pet of the gang, dally punches him in the eye and spits on him. and, man, did dally regret that. bro completely forgot about the chick and focused on ponyboy. yk how siblings would be like, "nonono, don't cry, hit me back! don't tell mom!" well that was dally.

when they got back home, pony kept his mouth shut because he and dally are actually pretty chill, but Darry was livid and wanted to know who laid a finger on his baby brother. then, Darry starts accusing STEVE, and that makes soda mad and he confronts Steve like:

Soda: did you hit my baby brother?

Steve: Wtf are you talking about

Soda: admit it, Steve. you hit him.

Steve: WHY WOULD I HIT HIM.

so that resulted in Steve telling two-bit about the entire conversation, and that escalates to two-bit telling Johnny, but nobody actually knows WHO HIT PONYBOY. and pony isn't gonna just tell them, right? so, he and dally make this entire story that the socs stopped them and dally was handling 2 of them and ponyboy had to fight off the other one, giving him that black eye.

it worked pretty well until dally was a big mouth and was mocking pony by saying, "gEt OfF hEr, DaL," and that sounded a bit too familiar to Johnny.

so, they tried bribing Johnny to not tell anyone, but Johnny obviously told Darry because it was driving my guy NUTS.

when Darry found out, ponyboy made sure dally was at a party because he usually stayed a couple nights over when at parties anyway. Darry was like a bull. he was flaming.

oh, you don't think soda was, too? two-bit, also? AND Steve?

they all wanted to go get dally in that instant. soda was arguing about how dally was twice ponyboy's size, while two-bit was trying to find his switchblade.

eventually, ponyboy got all of them to chill out, but when dally came home a couple days later, everyone was yelling at him.

Darry: why would you hit a 14-year-old!?

Dally: in my defense, he didn't care much!

Ponyboy: guys, it's okay-

Soda: you better sleep with one eye open, Winston.

Ponyboy: Soda!!

#the outsiders #ponyboy curtis #dallas winston #johnny cade #sodapop curtis #darry curtis #two bit matthews #steve randle

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twstmagica · 5 months

Text

Magical Girl Yuu's First Day pt 2

It doesn't look like Fire Dude (Idia?) is gonna speak first

“So what did he mean by orientation?”

Muttering: “WTF are you stupid, how do you not know?”

“What was that”

“Ahhh, nothing”

Yuu gets the sneaking suspicion that this guy isn't going to be super helpful.

Fire Dude hunches further in on himself.

So orientation. That's like an introduction event for group stuff.

But what's with the robes?

Oh geez, is this a cult thing!?

Okay Yuu, gotta stay sharp. Play cool. Don't let him know you're onto them.

“Soooo will the leader be at orientation?”

Nailed it

“Huh?”

Did not nail it

Muttering: “what's with this weirdo.”

“Umm the headmaster will be there.”

bluff check passed

“Oki-doki, then I'll just save my questions for them. Please lead the way.”

Muttering: “I thought it couldn't get any worse than Malleus, but now I’m stuck with an escort quest for this newb.”

Well sorry Fire Dude. I didn't want to be kidnapped by your cult but sometimes these things happen.

They do eventually make it to a giant room with heck-ton of people in robes

Actually all these people seem to be guys.

Huh. That probably means something.

Yuu doesn't get a chance to ponder this mystery before a tall figure captures her attention.

Dressed differently from the others, this man has a snazzy tophat and bird mask hiding his identity, and wears a fancy suit and feathered jacket combo.

But the sleeves are hanging off his shoulders? Why not just wear a cape??

Uh oh. Bird-mask-top-hat man is heading straight for them.

Crowley is *!!!* at sight of the missing new student while Idia absconds the fuck out.

Fire Guy nooooo! We grew so close, why would you abandon me!?!

Birdman is gesticulating wildly as he talks.

“The nerve of kids these days!”

Ugh. This Birdman is squawking at Yuu about impatient students and she can't get a word in edgewise.

“I wasn't the one who-”

“Really, it seems each year students get worse!”

“No listen, there was this flaming raccoon-”

“Despite my hard work there's always something!”

“Bruh”

The child keeps trying to make excuses, but Crowley won't have any of it.

Fortunately the Headmaster of Night Raven is so generous, and only sends the delinquent to the back of the sorting line as punishment.

At this point Yuu is just going with the flow. Surely if the strange cult meant her harm they would be more menacing?

Yeah the birdman is super rude but he isn't actually hurting anyone.

And if Yuu was listening right this is apparently some kind of school, so there should be staff or teachers around who can actually help.

Yuu figures she can just wait until another, less wacky adult, shows up.

Oh hey! Horn Guy from earlier is standing with Fire Dude and a few other fancier cultists (students?).

They make eye contact and Yuu smiles and gives a little wave

Horn Guy nods back with a slight smile.

Smile plus a nod means we’re basically allies now.

Yuu is pretty sure that's how this works. If this is a school then the same technique used for choosing a worksheet partner should apply here as well.

Meanwhile the other dorm leaders are wondering why tf this freshie is waving at The Malleus Draconia

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst yuu #disney twst #twisted wonderland au #Magical Girl Yuu #she's about to go undercover #Night Raven Academy vs the cult allegations #Yuu still doesn't know Horn Guy's real name #She won't be finding out for a while #Idia wants to leave #Ortho is THRILLED #twst writing #twst drabble

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candied-boys · 6 months

Text

@stardazzler thank you so much for coming out of hiding to ask about Luke 😭 he's my bestest boi everrrrr

So I'll give you a summary of everything I can recall from the "My fiancee has turned into a kid and she's got me wrapped around her finger" event below the cut

So Luke walks in on a kid facing off with chevalier in a staring contest when suddenly she bursts out in tears.

Luke: "wtf bro? Whadya do to the kid?"

Chev: nothing. Hmph.

Luke: who are you and where'd you come from anyway?

Emma: I'm emma! And I dunno. I just woke up in the palace? Maybe this is a dream.

Luke: huh.. yeah a dream. Okay I can buy that. The fact that you look just like my gf and have the same name definitely has dream written all over it...

Luke: So what did the big meanie do, bb? What's wrong?

Emma: the book!

Luke: Book? What book?

Emma: I wanna see the book...

Chev: hands over book and walks away with a big hrmph.

Insert Clavis and Jin!!!

Clavis: is that Luke's secret love child?!

Jin: oh!!! Can we call him papa Luke now? I wanna be papa Jin 😎

Luke: oh fml.... Not these two... They are the absolute worst influence a kid could ever have!!!! Mr pranks and mr only-eats-candy. Oh no. They are not getting within an inch of this kid!!!

Luke: you see those two, bb emma?

Emma: yeah?

Luke: take a good look cuz if you ever see guys like that, RUN. got it?

Emma: Run. Got it. 🫡🫡🫡

Jin + clavis: 😰😰😰😰😰😰😰🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡😢😢😢😢😢😢🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

(Safely) Back at Luke's room...

Luke: so what's this book about anyway? *Reads cover* ECONOMICS?!?!

Emma: Will you read it to me 😍😍😍

Luke: wouldn't you rather I read you a nice story about a bear that loves honey or something??

Emma: no i wanna read that one!!!

Luke: why....

Emma: because it looks cool 😎

Luke: hoooboyyyy... Okay then...

Luke: so you see, you have to use the country's finances wisely. You can't just spend the money as you like.

Emma: oh!!! 😍😍😍😍 Why not?

Luke: well you see... I love honey. So I would spend all the money on building lots of shops that sell honey. What would happen then?

Emma: the city would be a mess of honey!! 😍😍😍

Luke: Yeah!!! Heaven for me, but what about the people who don't like honey? How would they feel?

Emma: oh I think they wouldn't like it 🥺

Luke: yup, that's why you have to think carefully about how to make everyone happy when spending money for the kingdom

Emma: wow you sure are smart, mister!! Like a Prince!!!! 😍😍😍😍

Mmmm i forget exactly what happens here but maybe he's like cuz I am a prince :p

Emma: OMG A REAL PRINCE?! LIKE THE KIND IN FAIRY TAILS!!!!

Luke: yup

Emma: I KNOW ALL ABOUT BEING A PRINCE 😍 THEY GO TO PARTIES!!!!!!!!!

Luke: oh yeah?

Emma: yeah yeah!!! And dance!!! And wear fancy clothes!!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍 I wanna go to a party and get dressed up!!!!!!!!

Luke: maybe when you're a bit bigger

Emma: like this big *stands on tippy toes*

Luke: more like this big *holds hand out to gf Emma's real height*

Emma: :((((((( I'll never be that tall

Luke: sure you will someday

Nokto: *pops in*

Luke: oh thank god it's only Nokto... He's not great with kids but at least he's no harm 😮‍💨

Nokto: yeah we gotta go buddy. Also what's with the brat?

Luke: dunno. She just showed up so I'm keeping her safe from the two troublemakers

Nokto: right then 🫤 welp, party isn't gonna wait for us. Let's go

Emma: A PARTYYY?!?!!! I WNANNA GOOOOO TOOOO 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💗💗💗

Luke: sorry bb, but you're missing the one thing you need in order to go to a party...

Emma: an invitation? 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Luke: yeah... An invitation 😢😢

Emma: 😥😥😥😥😥

Luke: hey emma, I gotta go to work now, but if you're a real good girl and stay right here, I'll do your hair up all pretty like you're going to a party, okay?

Emma: REALLY?! you promise, mister? 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Luke: promise, and maybe I'll even be able to get you an invite to the next party.

Emma: 😍😍😍😍😍 okay I'll be a good girl and stay right here and read this book!!! *Climbs back on bed and looks at book in fascination*

Luke: there is absolutely no way she understands a word of that.. but oh well 乁⁠(⁠ ⁠•⁠_⁠•⁠ ⁠)⁠ㄏ as long as she's entertained. Gotta ask the maids to keep an eye on her while I'm out tho...

Luke: *walking down the hall to the party* Leyla... :(

Nokto: you ok bud?

Luke: :/ meh

After Party.... Luke returns to his room to find EMMA IS MISSING!!!!!!!

*insert panicked Luke who finds emma in the kitchen with the two troublemakers*

Luke: *about to rawr at his brothers*

Emma: *sniffle sniffle* 😭😭😭

Clavis and Jin: Don't cry!!! We can make another batch!!! *Absolute panic* 😱😱😱😱😱😱

Luke: !!!!! 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 *Picks up emma and huggles her* the fuck?!?! What did you do to her!!!????

Clavis and Jin: NOTHING 😰😰😰😰😰 WE SWEAR!!!!

Luke: THEN WHY IS SHE CRYING?!!!!! 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

Emma: the cookies 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Luke: the cookies? What cookies bb? 😰😰

Emma: the cookies didn't turn out well!!!

Luke: we can get you more cookies bb. Anything you want!! Please don't cry 🥺🥺

Emma: noooo not the same!

Luke: 😰😰😰😰😡😡😡😡

Emma: because I wanted to make the cookies for you 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Luke: 😳😳😳😳🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

Clavis and Jin: told you we didn't do anything wrong 😮‍💨😮‍💨 we were just trying to help the kid out 🙄🙄🙄

Later when Emma falls asleep after the maids give her a nice bath 🫧

Luke: Hey Jin, is it wrong to forget or is it a good thing?

Jin: I think it means you're growing up. You're moving forward, so naturally things in the past get farther away. It's not a bad thing, just a fact of life.

Luke: I guess you're right... I feel bad that I thought of Emma first when I saw her and not Leyla... I guess that means I'm not trapped in the past anymore, but still...

I think it basically ends here and picks up in the epilogue, which I will translate tomorrow

🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

#ikemen prince #ikepri #luke randolph #ikemen luke #ikemen prince luke #ikemen prince luke randolph #ikepri luke

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randomgentlefolk · 1 year

Note

Do you think we’ll get to see the Pastel Princesses realizing the Plaid Princes are in trouble? Will they try to mount a rescue mission? Or what if the Pastel King becomes their savior? He might go to the Plaid Kingdom and stumble upon the torture Plaid King has put his sons through? Make him realize just how insidious his old friend has become. He rescues them and finally realizes his own toxicity in how he approaches his own children. Maybe Frederick is the one who saves his brothers, becomes his own Angel of fortune and he and his brothers are the ones to tell Pastel King their father’s true nature.

Probably! Though I'm not sure the Pastel Princesses will find out, it is possible that Jack will find out.

I would imagine it as Jack accidentally went in the room with Leland's secret dungeon, and he was interested in the books and pulled THE EXACT CORRECT BOOK being like "Omg this is my fav book!" And then the dungeon opened and he's like "what" and goes in. He saw the princes and like "wtf.." and then maybe Lance will slip out (again) and tell Jack everything. Or maybe Blaine instead will tell Jack everything because he feels really guilty. At first Jack went into overprotective mode. But upon seeing the princes being literally tortured he thought "this isn't right.." and saves them. He also has a redemption moment where he realizes what he has done to his daughters. He's like "I'm hella mad at you and would kill you but you're also hurting and I'm quite literally the most shocked I've ever been so I can't do that." And then they search around for Frederick and found him. Either they found him in the hole or they just bumped into each other in the middle of Frederick trying to escape lmao.

Orrr if Frederick save his brothers then that can happen too, due to his.. llama training. So I'm sure he has the strength. We haven't got the full view of the hole he's locked in, so we can't be too sure yet that he's gonna climb out of that hole (even though it makes sense considering the parallel with his favorite book). Who knows, perhaps there's a door there and he does the classic "steal the key" method? But how will he rescue his brothers? There's probably still some resentment, and I SERIOUSLY hope they will talk about it in the future. But they don't hate each other, I'm sure of that. Maybe at first, Blaine will be pretty upset with Frederick (I'm not sure how Lance feels about Frederick), but they can't stay mad at each other for too long. Frederick definitely feels really guilty and apologize. Everything is still bitter but wait.. How will they escape from that dungeon?

First of all, is the dungeon door locked? We only saw Leland went to the dungeon through the bookcase, but what about vice-versa? Even if it is unlocked from the inside, how will they know that Leland isn't waiting outside the dungeon door, ready to jumpscare them? Or will they get out from the little holes on top of where Frederick was locked? (Aka climbing)

#cursed princess club #cpc #cpc blaine #cpc frederick #cpc lance #prince blaine #prince frederick #prince lance #cpc jack #plaid princes

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birbfeeder2artisticboogaloo · 1 year

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thousand autumns donghua, episode 9~

shen qiao is COUGHING UP BLOOD NOW OH MY GOD!!! FETCH A DOCTOR!! FETCH A PRIEST!! FETCH HIS CRAZY HUSBAND!! FETCH SOMEONE!!! wtf his cab is taking him out of the city, what terrible servi--OH NO IT'S BAI RONG D: bai rong: why are u asking about that old driver for, when there's a pretty lady in front of u??? 😘😘😘 shen qiao: ….i'm blind :( (also gay) OH NO SHE KILLED THE OLD MAN ;A; poor old man, rip lao wei, we never saw u but i assume u had friends or family who are missing u rn…. f in the chat for the tart's victim 😔 ahh she was hiding the sexy outfit under the plain one!! clever!! no one EVER expects the Double Outfit Gambit!! 👘👗 bai rong: come nowww yan wushi is so old and weird!!! i don't like ur boyfriend!! but i could be ur girlfriend!! i want to be ur girlfriend! hEY. HEYYYYY >:) shen qiao: pls stop touching me :( GIRL STOP THIS IS WEIRD THIS IS WEIRDDDDD ;A; oh SHIT GET EM SHEN QIAO!! THAT'S RIGHT!! DON'T LET HER BULLY U!!! everyone thinks they can take advantage of u bc ur a nice lad!! i hate it when ppl do that!! just bc he's nice doesn't mean u can hurt him! it doesn't mean u can mistreat him!! he may be KIND but he's not a fucking door mat!! >:V HE EVEN APOLOGISES TO HORSES FOR FUCK'S SAKE. HE'S SUCH A GOOD BOY ;A; shen qiao: *swoons* the old man arrives just in time to catch him again lmaooo shen qiao be looking at the sword of woe like it's a sword of WHOA D: yws: ur dying lol. why don't u be evil with me?? it'll be fun~ remember how ur pet hobo betrayed u??? didn't that suck?? aren't u tired of being nice?? don't u just want to go apeshit??? >:D SHEN QIAO JUST WANTS TO BE TRUE TO HIMSELF ;A; aww yissss more evil laughter :D ngl i really missed it, it never fails to make me laugh as well 🤣 AWW THEYRE BOTH HAPPY NOW!!!! OH MY GOD THEY'RE SO ADORABLE!!! THEY'RE BOTH JUST. SO HAPPY. I LOVE THEM. I LOVE THEM ;A; oh good he's got his stick back!! i was worried, since that twat broke it before!! poor shen qiao just can't catch a break smh 😔 maybe a broken arm, the way things are going for him 😔 THE MONK!!! i remember him!! is he going to say it?? IS HE GONNA SAY THE THING??? I'M WAITING FOR HIM TO SAY THE THINGGGG yws: i'm gonna go fetch what's his name, u go on ahead ok?? sq: wh-- yws: VIBE CHECK!!! *yeets shen qiao into the building* UH WHO IS WAIT YUWEN YOU???? IS THAT THE FUCKING EMPEROR WHAT THE FUCK I'M SO CONFUSED??? A GO DEADLOCK??? WHY ARE WHY ARE THERE SOLDIERMANS HERE??? ARE THEY MOVING?? IS THIS HOW EMPERORS PLAY GO?? BY MAKING SOLDIERS KILL EACH OTHER??? WTF???? well it's a good thing shen qiao can just. jump onto the life-sized game board. i. i sort of thought that would be cheating but. i guess not??? WTF HE WON HOW???? WHAT JUST???? WHAT JUST HAPPENED???? shen qiao beats the emperor and then politely compliments him like it was nothing. shen qiao who are u. shen qiao WHAT are u. shen qiao are u single OK WE'RE GETTING AN EXPLANATION THEN???? yeah no totally didn't understand at all :D i'm not even sure what go is called in chinese?? i think i heard.......qi?? something??? idk. also wHY ARE THERE SUCH COOL NAMES FOR GAME MANOEUVRES. WHAT IS HAPPENING emperor: lol ur good at board games, u want a job?? shen qiao, thinking: i'm in danger :) OH MY GODDD THE OLD MAN IS CALLING HIM ~A-QIAO~ IN FRONT OF THE FUCKING EMPEROR. IN FRONT OF EVERYONEEEE OH MY GOD uh-oh the monk made emperor angy. somebody better say emituofo for HIM now O_O seeing yan wushi acting polite is. EARTH SHATTERING. so strange. i'm…..shocked??? weird 👀

yws: anyway here are my evil plans. u should stay and help bc ppl will keep trying to kill u without my protection >:) sq: no thanks :) if i just let u shelter me, isn't that the same as being sheltered by mt xuandu?? i'll head out on my own :) yws, thinking: ppl keep treating him badly, but he just perseveres!! it makes me want to……HURT HIM MORE >:) wtf yan wushi u are a strange man. u are a weirdo. pls don't step on shen qiao. he's wearing white the stains will never come out yan wushi PLS lmao yan wushi trying to tempt shen qiao into going to dongkang with him is hilarious, i love the bg music as well!! it's so whimsical~ WELL WELL WHO MIGHT THIS BE??? idk him YET but he's??? kinda hot??? ngl i have a Type and it's. embarrassingly obvious smh rip birb….😔 also: the monk did NOT say emituofo. heartbreaking 😔

#birb watches #thousand autumns donghua #qian qiu #im rly having too much fun with this lmao #i hope my jokes are still funny bc i intend to continue #i have internet access and im going to make it everyone else's problem >:)#birb still says

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kkyaka · 1 year

Note

Omg how was it bro lmaoo

Bro anon LMFAOO, I got you (kinda tmi under the cut, so warning for kinda sexual explicit content LOL), this got really long I'm so sorry 😭

(takes a deep breath) okay, SO lol first things first

I had actually seen this guy at a Halloween party I went to last semester, but right as I was gonna tell him that I thought he was cute, he left. And then I saw him on hinge and we matched! He goes to the same school I do, and he doesn't live too far away.

So, I matched with him and started talking to him, and he wanted to come over at like 10pm on Monday (today is Thursday as I write this) and I had come from a volleyball scrimmage and I was NOT in the mood to hook up

So I told him that, and he said that wasn't his intentions (which was a SHOCKER) so I let him come over 💀 LMFAO and we just cuddled and watched anime. And he didn't stay long cause I was tired asf, but like towards the end, he said that he had lied about not wanting to do anything, but I think that was because I wore really short shorts lmfaooo

We held hands for a while and then he had to leave, so I walked him to his car (he held my hand the whole time) and then he drove me back to my apartment. And then he told me that he really wanted to kiss me, but he never made a move lol, so I did. I made the first move! I kissed him first! Who would've thought? But yeah, he like never made a move on me or anything and that made me feel better

So then he said he was free the NEXT day (Tuesday) and I said he could come over lol cause I was gonna be gone for a whole week and I wanted some fun lmao. So, we just cuddled on the couch watching TV again (I'm not gonna tell you what we were watching bc you'll judge me LMFAO)

Anyway, fast forward like an episode later, and we're making out on the couch and then like five minutes later, he's eating me out LMFAOOOO, and his head game was pretty good honestly

So then, we move to my bed but then he goes an gets a condom, and not once did I ever think to like stop him, which isn't bad! I've messed around with a lot of guys, but I've always stopped it before it gets to this point, but with this guy I was kinda nervous but not enough to where I wanted to stop it

Bro he ate me out so much, I was like I mean sure, if you want to lmfao. I didn't cum, but he made me feel really good, so I'm not really upset about that honestly, and I'm pretty sure I'll see him again when I get back.

So, I was kinda worried because he wasn't very long, but he was lowkey really thick, so I was like 😬 sir you might rip me in half no lie. And the whole thing was like kinda awkward, but we laughed about it. But we did it in missionary, cowgirl, and doggy and in missionary, he had my legs shaking lmfao

And in cowgirl, my legs didn't get tired as soon as I thought they would, and doggy??? Whew chile, y'all.

I was SO LOUD. SO FUCKING LOUD. Like, I was almost crying. I could've cum from that, cause he was hitting good but not like the best spots. But honestly, I think doggy worked best because my whole like vagina (???) is tilted forward lol

So, after the first position, I thought we were done, so I slipped on my sweatshirt lol, but HE WAS NOT, and after I got on top, I thought we were done lol but he had flipped me over and eat me out for a bit AGAIN??? And he had already taken the condom off and tried to put it in RAW??? HELLO??? and I stopped him like instantly, I was like no sir you can't do that bc I haven't been on birth control in a couple of months lol

So after I told him that, he said that he was gonna look for another condom because, and I quote "I wanna fuck you again"

HELP??? HELLO???

In my head, my jaw was on the fucking floor, but I guess the 😺 is pretty good LMFAOOO🤭

And so after THAT, he asked me if I wanted to go AGAIN, I was like wtf this man's stamina. I know he's gonna wreck my shit when we have more time together lol

And surprisingly, I feel very normal (?) about everything that happened. Like then next time we hang out, I'm gonna ask him what he wants out of this whether that's a relationship or just fuck buddies, idrc, but we were both kinda tired, but he cuddled with me like for an hour

And he had to be up at 5am and I had to be up at 7am, but I told him he could stay over if he wanted to, I would set an alarm for him, but he said that he felt it would be better to just go home, which I was fine with.

Anyways, that's the rundown, but yeah, I honestly wasn't expecting to punch the v-card any time soon, so this is a massive surprise lol. It's not a big deal to me, and virginity is a social construct, but for a while I just wanted to get it over with, and this time I wasn't nervous or anything and I didn't really have any negative thoughts

We'll see if I see him next week, I REALLY want to because I haven't been able to stop thinking about him lol, so I'm hoping he comes back over. Also, anon, this is probably WAY more than you asked for, and I'm sorry lmfao

#im sorry this is so long lol #but the next time he comes #i'll probably get my shit ROCKED #🥝.ask!#🥝.no sticker kiwi!

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marvellousinternethideout · 1 year

Text

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

Season 2

Ep 4 - Inca Mummy Girl.

Xander still has a thing for buffy...? I thought we were over it, but apparently not lol.

Don't worry xander I am pretty sure there would be a real human sacrifice don't worry.

Is mummy is gonna wake up!? Is she alive or...yup she did, and killed our blue shirt guy.

Damn xander. Willow baby move on, he's an idiot.

The breaking of the 4th wall in this show lol. How casually they're like, 'I hope he didn't wake up with mommy and break the glass(or something)' and then just connect the dots that this is what happened. Alright lmao.

Stop with jealousy xander.

Not the south America stereotypes. Also he just died. Damn that was fast. Also, became into a girl, which I am guessing is the princess mummy.

Ah, the classic 'you speak very good English'.

Wait, WAIT, WAIT, IS THAT OZ!? YES, IT IS. OH FUCKING MAN, HE'S HERE.

He's also a lead guitarist. DAMN!!!

Yes, babe oz, your type is willow, she is coming.

Willow baby, Xander isn't worth it.

Jesus, how many chosen ones does this show has?

She just killed the BODYGUARD!? Damn.

Oz and Willow have to meet in this episode. I am so fucking excited!!!!

Xander STFU. Oz you better hurry up.

YESSSS OZ JUST ASKED WHO IS THAT GIRL! YESS. That's your girl willow and also one of your love lives (not your future wife tho).

OZ fell in love with her at first sight. Damn boy.

Okay, the princess mummy is a bad person. Is she gonna try to kill xander...

Don't kiss her Xander...welp, he did.

Willow, oz is behind you, don't run, who cares about the supernatural, stay with him.

LMAO, the Princess mummy just broke. Wtf!

So, I loved this episode. Wished Angel was in but no problem we got OZ baby. Finally, we have someone for willow. My guy fell in love at first sight. Knowing how it ends between oz and willow, I am still excited to see them and watch their chemistry. Although little heartbroken that *spoiler alert* he will not end up with her and well...get married to someone else but I'll take what I can get.

Nothing much happens, another supernatural but not connected to the main plot. Still a great episode.

That's it for this episode, see ya in the next one. Cheers 🥂

#buffy the vampire slayer #Btvs #Buffy #Willow #Xander #buffy x willow x xander #s2 #Season 2 #btvs s2 #btvs s2 episode 4 #btvs commentary #btvs s2 review

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violaobanion · 1 year

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Hello, Succession Anon again with my last message til I can watch more in the who-knows-when future! Ah, the family cycle of abuse pit. A trope I shall never tire of watching!

LMAO yeah, not everyone has had a chance to be terrible yet, so currently I have some characters I only feel sorry for. I imagine that will change very easily (except for the dog I saw for like 5 seconds in this ep; BEST PUPPER, 100/10, NO DRAMA FOR THEM).

Anyway, here is my liveblog! May you enjoy my ridiculous amount of rambling, and also a light scattering of screaming. And a silly amount of em-dashes to separate scenes.

———

Kendall: [lights a cig, has one puff, then stomps it out to drama walk into a building] Arresting him for littering and for being wasteful. Jail for 50 years!

(After everything else I watched in the first ep, though, this is so far down on the 'people saying/doing bad stuff' things that it'd be a footnote on Santa's naughty list.)

———

Kendall: Does anyone want to talk to their dad?

My headcanon here is that Logan sneezed and instantly went 'Hmm, sounds like I need to call one of the little shits'.

———

Logan: [says he's excited full of an emotion that expresses he'd rather watch paint dry]

I'm beginning to see why these kids have daddy issues.

———

RIP Greg in the mascot dogsuit. It must not have been pretty or smelled good in there.

Also, I completely spaced out from what Greg was saying the moment I saw a dog. PUPPY!

———

Roman: 'Hey hey, motherfuckers!' Refuses to elaborate ANYTHING except mockery. Leaves.

I don't know whether to like him or not, but I would steal his last french fry.

———

I have no idea how to comment on Logan not only knowing about his 'surprise' party but also trying to have a say in it.

Like, relatable on the part of not wanting people in my face because anxiety. But it isn't abt anxiety for Logan, it's abt control, right? Sir, a surprise party is meant to have surprises!

———

WHAT THE FUCK IS A PREEKEND?! Why can't they say Friday; Shiv, I'm with you on this.

———

Kendall casually saying he'd give a bj without knowing his dad is in the room OH GOSH THAT POOR MAN it'd be like my fam finding my smut list. I'd jump out the window instantly.

———

Tom/Connor: casually tells a kid that he's got water pumping rights and people are gonna kill each other for said water some day

SIR, WHAT THE ACTUAL F

I can't believe 'hey motherfuckers' Roman was the sane man there, but THANK FUCK HE SHUT TOM/CONNOR UP. Well, tried to.

(Edit for Clarification: Roman called Connor 'Tom' for some reason, so I got confused and just put Tom/Connor here. RIP Connor.)

———

Shiv: What's that; Date R*pe by Calvin Klein? Roman: You wish. Shiv: …'You wish'???

SHIV, WTF. 2. ROMAN, DOUBLE WTF. 3. FORGET WHAT I SAID; JAIL FOR ROMAN FOR 100 YEARS.

———

RIP Greg, gets slammed into a door the moment he meets Logan.

Currently feeling the most sorry for Greg here; if he gets pushed out of a window at any point, I'm not even gonna be surprised.

'Yeah, that's Greg, bad shit happens to him a lot. You get used to it.'

———

Logan: Where's Tom? Shiv: He's right here. Logan: Oh, well, nevermind.

Logan, you can't just murder a man like that.

———

Kendall's ex(?): I'm just hoping [her date] doesn't leave coke smeared all over the kids' iPads.

EXCUSE ME WHAT?!

Oh, that was a dig at Kendall. Uh, I'm sad for everyone now, wow.

———

Logan: In the event of my demise (hi s4), I'm adding Marcia and leaving her my seat.

WELP. THAT'S A BOMBSHELL.

Shiv: Uh, I'm gonna need my lawyers to look at this. Logan: Sure. By 4:00, ok? Logan: Also, I discussed this with Kendall, but I'm staying in power as CEO. Kendall: Wh-what? Logan: Let's eat!

I see where Roman got his 'go in, throw shit at the wall, then leave' tendencies from.

'Fuck this shit I'm out' started playing in my head as Connor left too.

———

The longer Logan is on screen, the more I start… losing emotions. He just called rehab 'the nuthouse', and is generally insulting his son.

Logan: Is that why you're paying a billion dollars for a gay little website? Kendall: It's a portfolio of online brands and digital video content.

So Logan is Succession's Elon Musk, and Kendall is his son buying Instagram.

Now Logan's egging Kendall into punching him/mocking him for nearly crying, and poor Kendall is having a breakdown in the bathroom. Good lord, I want to hug him.

———

The past few moments they've mentioned a game, drove off in SUVs, and now there are helicopters. I have no idea what is going on.

OH, IT'S A BASEBALL FIELD. Now I know what's going on. There are so many shots of Tom holding a box, and I think that's the gift he's been trying to give to Logan. I feel sorry for the dude, and I get the feeling that's gonna sum up the show: me feeling sorry for characters.

Yep, it was a gift. Logan doesn't care. Continuing to feel sorry for Tom.

———

Tom: You need any help, any advice, just don't fucking bother, ok? Just kidding! [later] I'm a terrible, terrible prick. Just kidding!

Greg: [confused and clearly has no idea wtf is going on]

Don't worry, bro, me too.

Tom: Would you kiss me?

SIR, ARE YOU TRYING TO SPEEDRUN ANY% STRANGERS TO ENEMIES TO LOVERS?!

———

Ooh, did Kendall just go straight to the media about his family? 👀👀

———

Roman: Can you hit a ball? Kid: Yeah… Roman: Great, I will give you $1mil if you hit a home run.

WELL, THAT'S NOT GONNA PUT PRESSURE ON THE KID! But dang that is a lot of money, good on you, Roman.

———

Roman: [tears up the check right in the kids face, then gives him the torn pieces]

Roman, every time I say something nice about you, you fuck it up. I'm getting a spray bottle full of water, just for you.

EVEN LOGAN WAS NICE TO THE KID! You know you fucked up when Logan was (temporarily) nicer than you.

———

Kendall: I'm gonna stuff your mouth with so much money you're gonna shit gold figurines.

So Midas kink?

Kendall: [goes into graphic detail abt gold cages and silver d*ldos]

WHEN I SAID KINK I DIDN'T MEAN I WANTED A WHOLE ASS SUMMARY ABOUT YOUR FANTASIES, KENDALL

———

…I don't even know what to say about Logan making the kid and his family sign an NDA. Like, at least maybe the kid is getting money after all, but W O W.

I should probably get multiple water spray bottles.

———

Logan: Do we have a deal? His kids: No Logan: [instantly collapses from insubordination]

WELP. EVERYTHING WENT STRAIGHT TO HELL IN A HANDBASKET, AND THIS IS ONLY S1 E1.

———

Everyone else: [chaos, drama, and depression] Frank: [resting on a chair after getting fired]

Be free, Frank. Get away from this! …OH, THE KID AND HIS FAMILY GOT TOM'S GIFT FOR LOGAN! Like, kinda happy for the kid/family 'cause they could sell that or whatever, but rip Tom. Logan loves hurting his family more than your Brand watch.

———

That's everything from my liveblog of ep 1! Sorry for only one ep liveblog, but hopefully it was an amusing read. This is gossipy hen/Succession Anon, signing off! salutes

Hi my dear anon!

Haha I love to see your liveblogging, this was a very amusing read indeed. You're observations are pretty spot on and hilarious, and it made almost nostalgic thinking about the time when I watched the shitshow (affectionately) for the first time 😌

A few comments:

Tom and/or Greg: There's a fine line between feeling sorry for and being annoyed by these two fellas. I think you're gonna cross it many times (and hopefully soon). Still love them both btw. But god. UGH!

*sigh* What would this show be without daddy issues, amarite or amarite? 😏

I would steal Roman's last french fry too 🤣

Fun fact: Roman's "you wish" at Shiv's perfume comment was unscripted, and so Shiv's reaction is actually Sarah's reaction. For a split second she falls out of character and looks at the crew. But when you don't know, it just looks like Shiv fucking baffled. I love that for her and I love Kieran's improv. It's not the last time he does that (but sadly not all his attempts make it. One of them was even too good???)

"SIR,WHAT THE ACTUAL F" is one the most accurate descriptions of Connor I've ever heard. That man is so out of touch. Send help.

Logan is the male equivalent of a Karen 🙂🔪

Frank is love, Frank is life. That man? *chef's kiss* right there

I remember last time I rewatched this (right before s4) thinking "LOGAN COULD'VE DIED IN THE FIRST EPISODE??" and then thinking what dream scenario that would have been. But oh well!

#succession anon #answered #long post

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years

Text

Carly & Ali

Carly: heard from drew? Carly: long shot Ali: Ha, good one Carls Ali: God no Ali: he's AWOL? Carly: yea Carly: gimme calebs number? Carly: longer shot Ali: 'Course but doubt they're chillin' Ali: and he might act like saying his name invokes him to pop up like a demon but you know Ali: Have you spoken to Meena? Surely he's keeping her in the loop Carly: shes not picking up Carly: to me Carly: same as my mum and dad Ali: That's not like her, she's probably just busy, keep trying Ali: As for your 'rents, where have they gone? And why do you need Drew so urgent? Gah, sorry, so many questions Ali: Just go with this one, are you okay? Carly: ive been trying ages Carly: shes not on spanish time idk why she cant answer Carly: idk wot to do Carly: how do i get it to stop ?? Ali: Spain's only an hour ahead of us anyway, not an excuse Ali: I'm 8 hours ahead and I've managed Ali: get what to stop babe Carly: the crying Carly: i cant think Carly: its all it does Ali: You've had the baby Ali: how long ago? did you go to the hospital? you need to if you haven't, like now Carly: what Carly: why would i go there Carly: its over with Ali: Because you both need to be checked over Ali: its really important Ali: have you birthed the placenta? Is it all out? If not you could die Ali: Never mind if there's anything wrong with the baby Ali: Call a cab and give me your deets, I'll transfer the money now Carly: that alien shit Carly: yea Carly: it screams healthy Ali: that is a good sign but there could be something you're missing, maybe that's why its screaming? better safe than sorry, they're not allowed to ask you about shit unrelated, so if you're high, sober up and then go, yeah? Ali: When did you last do a feed? Have you been able to? They'll show you how, it can be tricky Carly: id scream if i was born here Carly: gonna be stuck Carly: sober up? i need more Carly: shit hurts dont need to tell you Ali: They'll give you stuff at the Hospital Ali: why do you think anyone goes? Ali: and fo free baby gurl! please Carly: i cant Carly: gotta be hear for when my mum rings back Carly: & drew might come Ali: Give me your mums number and I'll tell her where you are Ali: then she can ring the hospital and they'll let you know Ali: I bet Drew has a key, no? Ali: Leave a note Carly: he left it when he went Carly: threw it at me Ali: Oh bab Ali: I'm sorry Ali: but you gotta focus on you Ali: and the baby now Ali: Not him, he knows where you are Ali: I can text him if you want, or try to call Ali: I swear nothing bad will come out of it Carly: but its his Carly: and i am Carly: he should be here Ali: But he isn't Ali: maybe he'll come back but you gotta keep going 'til he does, alright? Carly: i need to find him Ali: Not right now Ali: next step Ali: he's not lost, he doesn't want to be found Ali: i know that's harsh but its the truth Ali: he'll come back when he's ready, alright? Carly: what about me Carly: im not ready Carly: he doesnt care Carly: why should i Ali: he cares about himself Ali: AT LEAST do that Ali: if you can't the baby then the people at the hospital will help with that too Ali: you can't just leave it Ali: boy or girl? Carly: its a girl Carly: another one Carly: hes gonna be mad Ali: I don't think he's salty about not having a male heir babe Ali: If you really won't go...I'll do my best to tell you what I know and I'll send you links Ali: we'll do our best health check and then you've got to try to feed her, yeah? Is that okay? Carly: mad that shes here Carly: i said i wasnt having one Carly: you want me to read? cant hear myself think Ali: But you were Ali: and if you were doing it without protection then he was fully aware it was a possibility Ali: I'll voice memo you then Ali: it'll stop the crying Carly: he says its not his Carly: maybe not Carly: idk Carly: its got blood on it but could look like him when thats gone Ali: He said that to me when it definitely was so kind of his go to Ali: but even if it isn't, doesn't mean he has to be a dick to you about it Ali: Its not right regardless Ali: Especially not when you're alone Carly: how do i make it sleep Carly: im tired Carly: should i sing? Ali: That might help yeah Ali: Skin to skin to, that's comforting Ali: Lemme break down how you feed it, yeah? Hold on Carly: i cant pick it up what if i drop it fuck no Carly: gotta stay where it is Ali: You won't Ali: its your baby, its safer with you than it is on the floor Ali: get a towel, that'll keep it warm and put it to your chest Ali: [Sends 38 sec video] okay, if that's easier this vid shows you how but I'm here to talk you through Carly: all the towels are wet Carly: it can have my tshirt thats warm Ali: Good idea, see Ali: you know what you're doing Ali: you've got this Carly: its too small Carly: i have to put it back down Carly: ill hurt it Carly: fuming about me coming near it Ali: She's just hungry and confused Ali: Understandable, right? Dunno about you but I'd be pretty fucked off too if I'd just been pushed out my nice comfy home of the last 9 months Ali: You'll be her best friend in my time at all Carly: id put it back if i could Carly: whyd you wanna do this 3 times Ali: 'Cos I'm a bossy bitch and I want underlings to do my bidding and I get to tell 'em what to do Ali: speaking of, time for your masterclass Ali: get her and get comfy on the sofa or your bed or wherever is bed Ali: best Carly: k Carly: shes heavy wtf Ali: That's good! You did a good job cooking her then Ali: and if she's a lil chunk, this should be easier Carly: shes small but im sleepy Ali: you can both take a snooze when this is done, usually conks 'em right out Ali: is your tiddy out? Carly: knew you fancied me Ali: you know Ali: getting in there while your defenses are down Carly: im single Carly: you too Ali: Lets do it mama Ali: cutest fam ever? i think so Carly: shes not cute like yours Carly: weird coloured thing Ali: she's probably covered in the gunk and pink from screaming her head off Ali: no ones finest hour i bet she's beautiful Carly: ill get it to take a selfie Ali: yay! get it on the nip 'cos i gotta see my boo too 😍 Ali: line her nose up with your nip, kinda tickle her top lip with it, she should open her mouth wide Ali: then you can shove it in Carly: done that before Carly: weird Carly: [Sends pic of tiny baby Indie] Carly: does she look like him idk Ali: Definitely Ali: Looks a bit like Edie Carly: ill send him the pic Carly: probs should take a better one Carly: how do i look? Ali: Like you've just given birth Ali: so a goddess Ali: but a knackered one Carly: youve got a fetish Carly: cant trust that Ali: me??? Ali: didn't impregnate myself Ali: look at Caleb! Carly: and drew Carly: wont see him Ali: Clearly its his thing too Ali: but he's more about the before than after yeah Ali: he can't stay away forever Ali: he wouldn't leave Meena Carly: youre smart Carly: if i go there he cant avoid me Ali: Exactly Ali: Camp out Ali: Ana will help you with the baby shit if you like Carly: why Carly: she doesnt know me Ali: Because she's a good person Ali: plus she's a social worker, it what she do Ali: and she knows Drew better than most, she raised him Ali: worth a shot Carly: shes not his mum Carly: but she can take this kid Ali: yeah she's better than Ali: is that what you want? Ali: she'll discuss it with you, make sure you both get what's best Carly: im not talking to her Carly: she can take it or not Ali: No one will just take her with no questions asked Carls Ali: for your welfare and the kids Carly: im not answering a social workers questions Ali: They're not entitled to judge you Ali: She won't Ali: and as far as drugs are concerned, if you want to give the baby up then literally none of their business at all after that Ali: and if you did decide to keep her then they work with you Ali: they're not gonna just shop you, it ain't like that Carly: make me go to rehab is how its like Carly: fuck no Ali: They can't make you Ali: there's no point Ali: you can only get sober if that's what you want Carly: my mum and dad'll make me Carly: i know theyre gonna Ali: well, where the fuck are they now? Ali: if they're so concerned about you they'd be here Ali: actually supporting you Carly: theyll come when they find out about her Carly: i never told them Ali: Good, I hope they do Ali: but how did that happen Ali: how could I see and they didn't Ali: or Drew Carly: they dont come back Carly: drew did see thats why he left Ali: yeah but they must talk to you Ali: your mum has obviously been there how did she not clock something being up Ali: and not soon enough in Drew's case Carly: i call them if i need money Carly: they gotta think its why im calling now Ali: When do they call you? Carly: if i call and they didnt pick up Carly: unless theyre busy Ali: I see Ali: how's she doing? done feeding? Carly: sleeping Carly: how are yours? Ali: best feeling ever, right? Ali: much the same, its late here Ali: I'm pulling an all-nighter lowkey, finishing up some work Carly: i miss junie Carly: whatever your on for it gimme some Ali: i'd be creepy and snap him sleeping but no doubt the flash would wake his highness Ali: he misses you too, i'll get him to facetime Carly: aw Carly: go work bitch Carly: i shouldnt kept you this long Ali: don't be daft Ali: queen of multitasking Ali: and not just junie who misses you is it Ali: #massiveLESBIANcrush Carly: my tits are gonna go down Carly: snap me up now Ali: Trying, like Ali: make it facebook official Ali: that'll get the lads attention ey Ali: why else do it Carly: yea Carly: my parents too probs Carly: lapsed catholics Ali: be on the next plane over to get you back on the dick like Ali: i'll get on it #longdistancelesbians Ali: my ex gonna be so mad Carly: mine too Carly: wtf am i gonna do Carly: I dont want him to be an ex Ali: even though he's fucked you over like this? Carly: i fucked him over first Carly: i lied Ali: not really Ali: if anything, you lied to yourself Ali: but you didn't wanna hear it, couldn't Ali: and that makes sense Carly: cant block it out any more Carly: fuck Ali: it gets really real really fast Ali: doesn't it Ali: but you have got this Ali: i've got you, however i can, yeah? Carly: i dont want it to be Carly: i dont want it Carly: i cant do this Ali: okay, that's okay too Ali: but she isn't going to just go Ali: whether it was getting an abortion earlier or what you have to do now Ali: you have to do something Ali: there's no quick fix for it Ali: ana can get you in touch with the right people who will make it as easy as they can for you and her Ali: or my mum Carly: if i leave her she'll get found Carly: why does nobody ever call me back wtf Ali: Yeah but they'll still try to find you Ali: or Drew Ali: and his DNA will be on the system so Ali: and I reckon if they got to him, he'd sell you out Ali: when's the last time you slept? Carly: idk Carly: what day is it Ali: Tuesday Carly: sunday Carly: saturday Carly: idk Ali: fuck girl Ali: you shoulda been banking up on it before Carly: ha Carly: easy fix Carly: need my dealer Ali: not if your gonna be breastfeeding Ali: unless he gonna bring formula too Carly: i can go myself for that Carly: get a car Ali: you getting enough cash in, yeah? Carly: ha no Carly: no student loans for this bitch Ali: you'll have to look into getting help with that Ali: there's funds and shit, i'll find out the info Ali: that or tap Drew up for child maintenance Carly: yea cos hes declaring his earnings Carly: i wish hed talk to me Ali: exactly, bribe him like Ali: he's got a lot to lose Carly: hed never forgive me Carly: i cant Ali: but you can forgive him for all he does? Ali: got it bad honey Carly: yea Carly: its fucked Ali: is there anything he could do to make you stop loving him Carly: idk Carly: why Ali: cos you'd be happier if you didn't Ali: right Ali: like, he treats you like shit Carly: i wasnt happy before Carly: & he hasnt this whole time Carly: it got bad Carly: me too Ali: but you could be Ali: you don't have to give up hope of ever being Ali: and he did for the majority of the time though, that should outweigh the good Carly: with what Carly: this kid Carly: im not you Ali: no Ali: of being happy Ali: with just you Ali: or someone else who treats you better Carly: i dont have a job or friends here and i live in a caravan Carly: not gonna happen Ali: you can get both Ali: you're cool Carly: ha Carly: youre dreaming Carly: fucked the allnighter Ali: i'm not the only one Ali: and why not? Carly: drew says im a junkie Ali: what does he know Ali: and anyway, functioning junkie Ali: shits possible Carly: he knows me Carly: he loved me til i fucked it Ali: you haven't DONE anything Ali: a baby happened to you BOTH Ali: you're both reacting, right or wrong now, whatever Ali: and he probably still does but Ali: love ain't always enough Carly: why are you my friend? Ali: I said, you're cool Ali: funny, smart, nice, you already know i fancy you so no need to kiss arse any more, yeah? Ali: you're SO friendable, babe Carly: shoulda fallen for you Ali: yeah well, the tragedy of being straight and feelings not following logic Ali: sometimes, you gotta fuck feelings tho, do right by yourself Carly: i dont feel anything when he isnt here Carly: nothing happens Carly: cept today Ali: make stuff happen Ali: its only chaos darling Carly: youre not here either Carly: what am i gonna make happen on my own Carly: this shit Carly: idk Ali: what do you wanna make happen Ali: anything, however unlikely you think it is Carly: i want him to come back Carly: my parents too Carly: but none of them are Ali: can't control other people nah but you can do all YOU can to make it happen Ali: what would make him come back? who would he wanna be with? and you can try to talk to your 'rents and tell them what is up...longshot but maybe they don't realise how shitty they're being Carly: they're not Carly: theyre busy Carly: and im not a kid Ali: busy with what? Ali: living it up in spain? Ali: they kept you, you're their kid for life Ali: they don't get to peace at 16, 18 whatever the fuck Carly: they didnt vanish Carly: i know where they are Ali: yeah but they should be here rn Ali: you need them Ali: maybe if you ask, when they answer, they will come back Ali: i'm not slagging on 'em, its just facts Carly: i dont want to go live in spain Carly: fact is theyll try and force me Ali: well, they can't make ya, tell them why you wanna stay here Ali: they could still be supportive Ali: even if they're not physically with you every day like Carly: they wont let me stay for him Ali: okay...make something more parent friendly up then Ali: what they don't know won't hurt 'em Carly: youre so smart Ali: so i've been told Ali: with varying levels of sarcasm Carly: yea Carly: same Ali: You are though Ali: One of the many reasons we get along Carly: youre such a mum Carly: bigging me up like Ali: s'what i do best right Ali: shoulda been a cheerleader, fucking irish schools not letting me shine Carly: thats what schools do best Carly: be shit Ali: true dat Ali: even if my uni is pretty swish Ali: and full of nerds like me Carly: looks it Ali: still, miss the homeland like Carly: switch places Carly: shes crying again what does she want this time Carly: headfuck Ali: think its a bit too early for her to have shat, maybe wee but Ali: probably wanting her next feed Ali: you do it roughly every 2 hours for the first month Carly: ffs Carly: howd you get anything done with 3 of them Ali: ask myself the same question Ali: luckily they're not all on the tit 'cos form an orderly queue lads Carly: not getting my tit out again Ali: its that or formula run to get her to stop crying Carly: i cant put her in the car Carly: she'd fall out Ali: that solves that then honey Ali: get 'em out get 'em out get 'em out Carly: perv Ali: 🤷 Ali: single mum, gotta get my kicks where i can yo Carly: get fucked Carly: not offering Carly: one of the nerds would be up for it Ali: no need to tell me Ali: desperation station Ali: bless 'em Carly: do you go to class with your shoulders and knees out Ali: its boiling here, not even trying to be a shameless hussy Ali: can't be swooning erryday, got places to be, shitty bums to wipe Carly: yea Carly: cant steal that excuse myself Ali: sadly not Ali: can use breastfeeding though Ali: you're just out here feeding ya kid, looking hot as a by-product, fight me world Carly: don't Carly: how is this happening Carly: im looking at her and idk Ali: i can't believe you did it all by yourself Ali: you're a right tough nut Ali: but you don't have to keep doing it alone Carly: but i have to do something Carly: wtf Ali: yeah, keep both of yas alive until you figure out your next step Carly: make it sound simple Ali: 'course Ali: i'll allow you some melodrama but i can't claim hormones as hard Carly: u can Carly: and homesickness Ali: alright, lets have a good sob Carly: this kids done enough Carly: has you beat bitch Ali: rude Ali: already winning fresh out the womb Carly: what you naming it Carly: said you would Ali: you're serious? Carly: idc Ali: probs think on that a bit longer, whether you wanna name her or nah Ali: but my lists be ready don't fret Carly: k

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sunofrainbowdash · 7 years

Conversation

The Metaphorical Death of the Sun

Sophie: [Sophie's been avoiding everything having to do with the Dae's. It was a hard, realizing that she couldn't even go two measley? weeks without seeing one of them. And it was the mother, of all of them. Let's ignore the fact that she'd pretty much cut Mina out of her life, and Sun, forget him as she tried, she still found herself thinking about him. Moreso as she was sitting down in his house chatting up with his mother. It was like old times, as if nothing happened, but this time, sitting at the coffee table she was wishing he'd actually not turn up. There wasn't any hint of hope for a ~surprise sun~ anywhere in her thoughts. It was obviously so opposite, and though she'd already felt a little more happiness in her life with her chat of Miss Rainbow Dash coming to an end, she knew that was about to be over with. So the Mrs? excused herself with a phone call, swearing to come back after-- which is probably what she never did-- and as Sophie was about to pick up her purse and make her way out, well I'm assuming Sun is there to metaphorically slap her in the face. wait i'm lying, there's a suzy for that lol]

Sun: [Sun's been at his internship all day, and he's ready to relax, and have a nice time hanging around his house (Suzy is in fact coming over, but he's, again, gonna find a way to sneak her in, like he probably has been all of this time. Yike.), but AS IT SEEMS, his family does not tell him when they will be having company, and I'm sure there's something about the air that gives it away immediately that Sophie is there. So when he walks into the living room and sees that she actually is there, his shoulders sag over, and he just sighs, thinking of the last conversation they had. He says nothing to her, as he figures, yup, she probably wants that. He's on his couch. There we go.]

Sophie: [She looked away immediately, having to tear her eyes away from the gorgously dressed Sun. And on the inside she wanted, and almost acted on impulse to swing that bag of hers at him. She would have rather GONE BLIND, than to see him so fine and dandy, and dresed almost too much to her appeal. So with a sinking and feirce eyeroll, she gritted her teeth to force back the, well, the betrayal, and the sadness inside of her. And though she knew it wasn't an outright betrayal--something he could not have done purposely, he had to have known what he did to her. He had to have known how insanely he made her feel, and if he didn't well, she would surely tell him.] I just don't understand... [She takes a step towards him.] how you sleep at night. [She scoffs.] How can one person treat someone so... [and she stops there because she's trying to find the word.] Disgustingly. If you didn't want anything to do with me, why would you push me so hard?

Sun: [He definitely had not been expecting her to say anything to him. He honestly thought she'd just pick up her stuff and leave. So when he heard her speak, he might have jumped a little, and he sunk into the couch when it registered that he was being, well, chastised. She confused him /so/ /much/. She'd taken everything back, right? So why was he still being yelled at? He looked away from her, casting his eyes to the floor. Normally he'd be throw the attitude back at her, but he just couldn't right now. So, all while she was speaking, he didn't look at her. Though, when she presented a question to him, which he presumed was not rhetorical, he looked back to her, and sighed. He ignored the statement before the question, because it was ridiculous to say that he'd not wanted anything to do with her.] Pushing you how, Sophie?

Sophie: Do I really have to go over this with you? [She's shaking her head right now, because honesly she's vibrating with a small rage because wTF sUN.] I never wanted any of this. I told you I didn't, and you pushed me. You p l a y e d with my mind, and then finally when I had fully convinced myself that you were right, entirely right for me [EXASPERATED SIGH.] You know I was mean, REALLy mean to you, but you can't even fathom-- you can't even comprehend how you've been treating me. And I thought we were friends. Friends don't do this to each other. So now what, Sun? I have to apologize to Mina and your mom, and explain to them that I can't stand their ~Sun enough to even come over? Is that fair Sun?

Sun: Sophie, that's not even... [He wanted to argue that everything she'd just said wasn't fair for him either; that she gave him no inclination of liking him for any reason other than what he might have on that day, and that her behavior was /confusing/ for him. But she appeared to have it in her head that only he was in the wrong, and it wasn't possible to fight Sophie when her mind was made up.] I don't know what you want me to say to you. I'm sorry, but I don't know what to do, okay? I wasn't /playing/ you. It's- It's complicated.

Sophie: Complicated? No. You don't get me to realize I have feelings for you and shove them down the drain when you want. You don't get to use my own words against me. You weren't just a lapse in judgement, and you fail to see that. But I see everything now, and you can sit there and diminish it all to one "complication", but it doesn't change the fact that I cared. And it wasn't fair to you to turn me away like that, not when you and your family are such a big part of my life. And you don't get to just say "sorry", Sun. Not if you're going to be this much of a jerk. [So huff, and there's a turning away because she's sad again, and let's not say anything more because she's gonna cry like an enormous baby heading towards the door bye sun.]

Sun: [So he feels bad. Really bad, as he should, because he's a lying, triflin' ho. He's frowning a really big frown, and he still isn't sure of what to do, because Sophie showing emotion was still a foreign thing to him, and so he didn't know how to react or what to say to her. All he did know was that he didn't want her feeling whatever way it was she was feeling. (Robot Sophie was easy to deal with. Sophie with feelings? Yikes.) So, when she turns to go to the door, for the first time I'm guessing, ever, he's gonna get up off the couch, and start to follow her out.] Sophie. That's-- I didn't mean it like that. I'm just-- it's--. [He just makes a face, because he's not sure how to finish that sentence. She's taken the ability to speak from him. How lovely.] I will /never/ be able to do that. Ever. Not really. [I think it's clear which part of her rant he's answering, but boy saying that is gonna bite him in the butt in a second.]

Sophie: [Not once did she turn around, okay. Not once, because she was too busy finding her own composure. So she really didn't see that wierd face he made towards her, she couldn't even force herself to turn around a take his words in, and she couldn't make herself spin around to see if they were true or not by the look in his face. Because they probably weren't, that was her opinion. So the muttering shadow behind her fought with his words, and her eyes were on the door in front of her. Before twisting the door knob, however, she had decided that maybe it was time to face that ice cream boy. So she did. There was a tiny spin, face to face, and so yeah, maybe she did believe him, because she felt like she was seeing a completely different part of the guy. Maybe they were capable.] Either way, it's too late isn't it? You've already made it evident that you're not to be trusted. [So with a nervous sadden laughter she shrugged.] There's nothing you can say to make me f e e l any better.

Suzy: [SO, somebody had sent Sun a text in between the time he got up from the couch and now. (HE LEFT HIS PHONE IN THE LIVING ROOM, ROOKIE MISTAKE.) Suzy assumes the twisting of the door knob is Mr. Dae coming to open the door, because Sophie has impeccable timing. So when the doorknob stays stationary, she is confused. She just k n o c k s on the door, like 'hello????', and perhaPS, she calls Sun's name, like 'wyd bf?']

Sophie: [As if to cement her last statement there is a voice heard from outside, and she cuts her eyes at that Sun.] I'm sorry, am I interrupting something? [SO THE DOOR IS OPENED. THANKS PARRIsh, and the ReVEALING OF SUZY IS LIKE THE REVEALING OF THE PHANTOMS BIG UGLY BURNT UP FACE. THANKS PARRISH, Actually it's not even like that, beause Sophie is not surprised. So arms folded across her chest there is an eyeroll and a sARCASTIC ADDRESSING.] Mina's friend, wonderful of you to join us. [though her eyes are occupied on Sun as they are shooting AVADA KEDAVRAS AT HIM.]

Sun: [Sun's eyes go wide. Like, terror spreads across his whole face, for real. When he sees that face of his ~girlfriend~, now looking confused because of the fact that Sophie is standing there with him, he wants to run up to his room and lock the door. But none of that terror could have amounted to the PURE TERROR he felt when his eyes landed back on Sophie, who was looking at him with a face akin to that of this https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/image...] S-Suzy. [He gives the most awkward and scared of smiles. And then he mumbles.] You're early.

Suzy: [As I said, Suzy's looking at Sophie with much confusion, because WHY is she here? Why is she standing here ALONE with Sun? And WHY is she speaking to her in such a way. She looks to Sun.] I texted you to tell you I was here. [And then back to Sophie, because reALLY. She's giving the biggest upside down smiley emoji face right now. AND THEN BACK TO SUN AGAIN.] I'm still Mina's friend, am I?

Sophie: [And though the girl looked at her with much confusion, Sophie stood her ground, not even taking a step backwards to let the SUZY IN. And honestly there was a scoff at the idea, having to text someone when you're at the Dae residence, rather than walking right in as Sophie did. So to Suzy: http://33.media.tumblr.com/953dfa1f74743..., just because] She asked a question Sun. Answer it.[There is an eyebrow raise towards him, and more of those evil stares, but imagine a softening because, answer it Sun and don't be wrong.] What else, no, who else could she be?

Sun: [Under the gaze of both of the women in front of him, Sun was starting to sweat. His eyes kept flashing back and forth between both of them rapidly, because, boy he was in DOO-DOO.] She's-- uh... She's-- uh... Suzy? Just Suzy... [He gives Suzy this look like WHY ARE YOU SAYING THESE THINGS. IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE /SECRET/.]

Suzy: [Now this, as you could imagine, has Suzy annoyed, angry and V V UPSET. She gives a look expressing all of these things to Sun in response to what he'd just said. So she huffs, angrILY, ANNOYED at the idiot known as Sun Dae. With no regard for Sun, because there has to be some UNDERLYING REASON as to why he didn't want Sophie to know, she turns back to the other girl.] I. Am. His. Girlfriend. So, maybe, you should let. me. inside. [Said through grit teeth, oh jesus.]

Sophie: [Have to admit that word has got a Sophie real sHOOk THANKS PARRISH. So sure, she WAS looking at Suzy with a wild condescending look before because step off, but now it appeared she was the one to be stEPPINg OFF. So again to Sun trying to hide the hurt in her eyes, but come on, she REALLY LIKES HIM AND SHE CANT DO THAT OMFG.] Is it true? [And turn to Suzy.] Don't speak. [Holding up a hand to that one, like no.] I'd like to hear a confirmation because a second ago there wasn't a complication, right? [A THIS LOOK http://i.imgur.com/dryDpEy.gif ALRIGHT.] I guess I didn't realize it was Mina's friend.

Sun: Suzy! [And he's gonna sound angry, and mean, and v pissed, because how daRE she take that into her own hands, and just decide to tell someone (especially Sophie) that they were together? He looked at Sophie when she spoke again, and seeing the look on her face- one he'd never really seen before- it was like his heart sank just a little bit, because onlY NOW does he see that, yup, he was cruel to her as well. Just in a different way than she had been to him.] Soph... I--... Y-Yeah. Yeah she's-- it's true. Yeah.

Suzy: [UNFAZED BY THE BOY GETTING ANGRY WITH HER, TBH.] Right. His /girlfriend/. So, if you could let me in please?

Sophie: [And cut those eyes back to Suzy.] Congratualations. [A this look. http://i.imgur.com/3WJbUV5.gif] You seem perfect for each other, I could go for punching you both in the face right now. [BUT SHE DOESN'T, though there is a WONDERFUL SHOVE, and she makes her exit.]

#private #yike

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koalala1031 · 7 years

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Winter 2017 First Impression-thingy

- all of 'em are 1-episode in –

Akiba's Trip: Dropped. Too cringy. The premise is somewhat interesting but they just have to go for the generic route for the execution. I thought I'd at least enjoy it ironically but nope. The characters are cringy too, especially that Engrish-speaking bitch who's basically the worse version of Mari from Love Live Sunshine.

Masamune-kun no Revenge: Pretty much what I expected. Pretty sure the plot is the usual "from hate to love" rom-com. HOWEVER, according to my brother who already read the manga, MC-kun is basically a mix of "generic harem lead" trope and "shoujo hero" trope. Plus Hanae Natsuki's voice also adds more fun xD

Shouwa Genroku Rakugo Shinjuu S2: THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!! I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!! IF YOU FOLKS HAVEN'T WATCH S1 GO FUCKING WATCH IT!!! IF YOU'RE NOT WATCHING IT WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN YOUR LIFE?!!! But seriously, given that S1 set the bar (sorta) way too high, I also have to anticipate that S2 will, albeit still brilliant, not be able to live up to S1. But it could turn out to be Empire Strikes Back-tier sequel for all I know (which might be asking too much, even for Rakugo standard ._.)

Demi-chan wa Kataritai: I came here expecting discount MonMusu, but actually it's pretty cute and fun.

Little Witch Academia: I kinda watch the web movies beforehand, so I already have some idea about the world building. But don't worry, story-wise it's not obligatory. As in the series itself, well, it's EXTREMELY well animated #SasugaTrigger. The premise is pretty Harry Potter-esque, not that special, but it's still fun anyways. Also Sucy best grill.

Hand Shakers: Okay WTF did I just watch? The plot isn't that promising, the characters aren't interesting either, but most of all, the visuals are the most unwatchable one I've seen for a while—to the point Konosuba looks like it's made by KyoAni and Berserk 2016 looks like it's made by Madhouse. Plus the fanservice is straight up cringy, and this comes from someone who enjoyed Keijo. THAT'S👏NOT👏HOW👏BOOBS👏WORK👏DAMMIT👏 Pretty much the only redeeming things about this shit is the VA lineup and (potentially) the OP song. Nevermind, I'm staying only because I wanna see how much of a trainwreck it's gonna be.

ACCA: Pretty okay I guess. Not much happened, mostly just introduction and build-up. But hey, since the manga already ended, I think a complete adaptation isn’t outside the realm of possibility.

Konosuba S2: Kazuma & co. are back with their shenanigans yaaay. Explosion ensues. That’s all I could say about the story. The animation still looks terrible, but at least it’s still more bearable than Hand Shakers. Last but not least, KAZUMASREALLYTHEBESTKONOSUBACHARACTER.

Kuzu no Honkai: Well that’s... that was kinda... *lenny face x3* But seriously, I can’t help but get interested thanks to the NTR premise.

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warnerbro · 7 years

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can't keep my hands to myself.

Boo: [So Boo's walking. FINALLY. He feels like he can run. He can, but he's supposed to take it easy. RigHT. He's out and about. Buying groceries. Cleaning his parent's house, working on the plants outside. I guess it's summer? Cilla's apparently has been around, and I'm sure they've agreed to hang out, which is what they are doing??? She walks up. There is a grin. Because it never fades okay. And somehow they've never touched upon that last conversation at lunch right? right. But I'm sure like Celine Dion it all came back, and yeah, Boo's totally remember why, how and exactly when he fell in love Cilla all over again. And it's painful, because he knows he should stay away but fight him, he won't. So she's walked up, Boo gives her a ~Hey, and crossed his arms over his chest.]

Cilla: [Cilla's walking a veRY thin line right now, heading over to Boo's parents' place again and again, especially with her fiance not knowing that that's what she's doing, but now that it was the position she'd put herself in, she couldn't imagine wanting to change it. It wasn't like she was doing anything wrong. They were just friends again, that was all. Donnie would freak out over just that, but that didn't make it wrong. Just friends. No big deal, right? None. So, she comes up to the house, and sees Boo, that big grin on his face as usual nowadays, and she gives a soft smile back.] ~Hey back.

Boo: So, i'm gonna need you to change your shoes. [he looks down at her feet.] No holes in my grass. Fresh new, nice grass. [There's a sigh and an ulterior motive. An idea in mind-- because member that one lake? they gOIN.]

Cilla: [She looked down in confusion, then right back up to Boo.] You say that like I bought an extra pair of shoes with me. [GOD THE LAKE I DIE.]

Boo: Well I'll just have to carry you then. [because when isn't he carrying Cilla at this point?]

Cilla: [And, as I'm sure it has multiple times in these past few months, her face heats up.] You're supposed to ~take it easy~, Boo.

Boo: [he shakes that big head of his,] Nope. Don't believe in that. Plus, I'm sure I could run a mile right now. But I did have some plans in mind. [ ... for us.......... to hang out.... only.... no other ideas... i swear. ]

Cilla: [She doesn't care, she still feels concern. Like, geez, dude. R E S T.] Plans, huh~? [There is a /hint/ of innuendo in her voice, but honestly, she doesn't mean for it to be that way.] Alright, then. Just don't hurt yourself.

Boo: [So he makes her cover her eyes the whole way fyi, though I'm sure she's been here reCENTLY WITH DONNIE IRPRIp, and I don't know how they get there. maybe cil just walks like a normal person, maybe boo carries her, maybe they take a car because i'm sure it's not actually walking distance but either way Cilla has a blindfold okay. And they arrive because fastFORWARD. ]

Cilla: [Her eyes are still covered I'm presuming, and she's getting this air of deja vu, because this has totally happened before, and she's being lead by Boo, I suppose. She has an idea of what this might be, because, okay, Boo. I see you. But not really, I'm blindfolded.] Can I take this off now?

Boo: HOld, on. Just a minute, Cil. [ so he hurrieS AND CIRCLES THE CAR, OPENS HER DOOR.] now. [REMOVES THE BLINDFOLD. AND LET'S SAY THERE IS A NICE SUNSET LAKE In FRONT OF HER GDI.]

Cilla: [The blindfold drops, and YUP, it's the lake. Good deja vu instincts. She gets this REALLy big smile on her face, because, no, she probably hasn't been here in awhile. Take that. Then she turns her smile from the pretty sunset, back to Boo.] You dweeb.

Boo: [car door slam.] Says the one who was just wearing a blindfold...............................

Cilla: [And she's just gonna INFORM HIM of the fact that it's been awhile.] I haven't been here in ages.

Boo: [So i'm gonna say they are walking towards now? he picks at some plants along the way sure.] Before I moved back home, I would have said the same thing. [ NEW YEARS EVE ] I had forgotten how great it is. How pretty the sky gets, when you're gone for so long you just lose a certain appreciation for some things [THINGS AND YA MAYBE HE MEAN SPEOPLE. OR ONE SPECIFIC ONE WHO IS RIGHT NEXT TO HIM MHM.]

Cilla: Yeah, it's gorgeous. [And she's nodding in agreement with him, and though Parrish sees that double meaning, Cilla does not.] It's like practically nothing's changed. Like, all this time, and it all feels-- looks the same.

Boo: [did i mention he's carrying a blanket, because he is. and they are gonna sit. okay. well he does at least. he leaves room for her. let's watch the sunset k. he nods at her words, though, I'm sure he disagrees to much of an extent. Things are completely changed. And somewhere along all of that time spent away from Cilla and the lake, it's almost too much of a memory that once was. It's something he definitely wants back, but he doesn't press.] It feels the same... [he agREES to tHA TFINE.]

Cilla: [Yup. And that's really all she meant. That it feels the same, but she backtracked on herself yikes. So, she takes a seat on the blanket, almost wearily, because, sitting on a blanket at sunset together? Yikes again. There she is, looking at the pretty sunset, contemplating what the hap is fuckening. She's gonna contemplate and enjoy the view. Sorry bro.]

Boo: [fine we can do silence. we can do painful silence. Because Boo can just sit on with her while contemplating ALL of his horrible life choices especially where they all started... which was ThanKSGIVING A LONG TIME AGO.]

Cilla: [Cilla is now growing tense under thIS WEIGHTY SILENCE, because silences... never good, man. Sometimes worse than screaming. Yup. She shifts a little uncomfortably, throwing a side-glance at Boo who doesn't really seem all that fazed by the fact that they are /just sitting there/. 12 years ago this would have been no problem; normal even. Now it spoke volumes more-- because was he in the middle of thinking too hard too? Geez. More silence growing on.]

Boo: [he feels said side glance, k, he chooses to ignore it for awhile, as his eyes are pressed on the sunset in front of him, but he's having his quiet time. Contemplation runs wild, because yes, he is thinking way too hard, as I'm sure he has been since he tore his god damned acl, and so finally addressing Cilla's side glace he speaks.] What..? [there's a half smile half laughter because stop being weird]

Cilla: [She's torn away from her hap fuckenings because of Boo's voice, and so she turns to him, shifting yet again so she's angled towards him fully.] I'm just-- thinking. I don't know.

Boo: Oh. [he sighs a little too contently because nothign can ruin this moment for him. okay. he's happy. watching the sunset with his old best friend.] Penny for your thoughts?

Cilla: [She sighs, not so contently, because she's SO LIKE, WTF TO EVERYTHING, AND SHE CAN'T GET OVER IT.] I... don't know, Boo. I don't know. I'm thinking about too much. I don't know.

Boo: So... stop thinking? [ya because life's so easy when you're boo warner.]

Cilla: [Nothing but a straight up look of 'are you joking'?]

Boo: [he laughs.] Fine. [retract because bad advise.] What are you thinking about?

Cilla: [She pauses. What exactly does she want to divulge about her thoughts? Geez.] I don't know. This. Right now. Everything. I don't know.

Boo: [it doesn't occur to him, any one of her thoughts. They do not occur to him, because all this time it was one sided. His resurfacing memories-- it was just his guilt, his regret all coming back.] I... [hopefully it was.] I feel it too. [ he picks at some grass at the edge of the blanket I'ms ure.]

Cilla: ... What do you feel? [that's what you get. just that.]

Boo: Just... Memories. [there's a shrug.] That's it. [downcast look. he goes quiet because that's what you get.]

Cilla: [She sighs, because she thought maybe she was getting somewhere as far as him explaining why she was suddenly someone he wanted to see after all of this time, but, of course. No dice. So, maybe she needed to be more straightforward?] Boo... It's not like it was. That's-- clear. What-- What changed? [she didn't even look at him asking this question. I'm sure the sun's down by this point. I guess, so like, harder to see facial expressions now.]

Boo: ["What's changed?"] Ha. [There's a chuckle, a silent one, and maybe only air comes out of his mouth, as that question completely baffles him.] I think that's the thing. [he stares off into the sunset, as I'm sure they are avoiding eye contact.] Nothing ever changed for me, Cilla.

Cilla: [She shakes her head at that, too quickly. Way too quickly, like she's trying to press the escape button on the metaphorical computer of life, yes.] No, don't... Don't say that. You--... [she paused, taking in a breath. and suddenly she became much more serious. more allie on a dock in the rain kind of serious.] Then why? Why didn't you try to fight for me? Why didn't you say something-- other than-- other than how much you couldn't stand me. I know I didn't make it easy, but--... but that didn't change anything for me either! [we are the epitome of allie rn.]

Boo: You didn't make it easy??? You didn't make it easy? Ha. You made it really god damn hard, Cilla! [gives her an ARE YOU SERIOUS look because?!?] You'd made up your mind about me based off of one stupid mistake. [hands in his hair old boo warner is coming because omg he's gonna puLL HIS HAIR OUT ALL OVER AGAIn.]

Cilla: You don't have to remind me of the things I did. I remember. And I know all the things I said, and I know all the things I did, Boo, but... Just because I said one thing, it didn't mean that it was over for me. And it wasn't. It wasn't over for me! And I waited for you for /so long/. But now it's-- [she glances down at her engagement ring and then back to Boo.] it's too late. [she shrugs, probably holding back patented Cilla tears.]

Boo: Well guess what, Princess, it wasn't over for me, either. [deADPAn.] If that wasn't completely obvious. No matter what you did, no matter how much I tried to... No matter which Rocket got in the way...[ his weight on his now shakey palms bcs hearing this is, let's be completely honest, is music to Boo's ears. Not her tears-- though, he sure was used to them by now, but GDI, that was all he needed to hear for what was to come next.] It's not too late. [ shaking his HEAD BCS NOPE, and just to show her that is completely undeniably not over, he's gonna grab that stupid pretty face of hers and kiss those god damn lips.]

Cilla: [The back of Cilla's mind was screaming, but there was an even louder screaming coming from the front of her mind, blocking the things in the back that were saying 'stop while you're ahead'. Because, honestly, all she'd wanted to hear all these years were those words coming from him. She was ready to respond, but before she could realize what was going on, Boo was kissing her. And as much as she wanted to tell herself that she should stop, she couldn't. She just pressed further into him, because it'd been 12 years too long, man.]

Boo: [HERE WE GO AGAIN. With his hands in Cilla's hair there is some much kissing going on. and on a blanket, in front of the lake and the sun is going down. She's pressed all to close, and his heart is beating so hard and loud in his chest, that the only way to silence it, was too pull her closer. Yes, he'd die happy, there, and then, rolling around on a blanket and kissing the love of his life RIP.]

Cilla: [THERE IS BLANKET ROLLING AND SO MANY KISSING, and yes, all thoughts except for the ones about book warmer are all gone from her mind, just like that. She's weak, swooning even. But, nope. We can't continue this here. Because book warmer needs to do some lifting in this situation. SO. She pulls back, almost a mirror from Christmas, minus the snow. But that same ~look~ is there.] Take me back to your house.

Boo: [and as much as Boo wants to go on, as much as he wanted to continue everything good that was going on there on that goddamn blanket. He doesn't. All he needed was that one kiss to prove Cilla was right, and he got it, right? And maybe that oNE just so happened to turn into more than a kiss, and maybe she WAS looking at him with those big beautiful eyes, so just like normal old Cilla Dodgeson always had-- she left him breathless, weak, and completely under her spell. Huffing for air, and trying to still his heart, he nodded. So he stopped. He shook his head, he pulled away, and let out an inaudible groan and himself sure. He stared at her. His lips on a raging fire because they had been deprived of something so great, but rose to his feet, and held out his hand for her. like come on let's go find a kitchen table instead.]

Cilla: [So, without another word, she grabbed his hand and stood from the blanket. Logic, at this point, is all but turned off for Cilla, as it tended to do when it came to *coughcough* physicality with Boo Warner. So, she waited for him to lead the way, breathin all heavy, and all excited for the kitchen table. Yup.]

Boo: [So he leads her to the car, holding her hand all the way there. He stop to open the car door for her, but I'm just gonna say before letting her step in he gives her one more kiss. just becAUSE HE CAN. So the car ride I'm sure is going to be painfully silent, and so they arrive back home. Boo pulls into the drive way, and ya he's going to sit there and stare at her again. Keys out of the ignition. He sighs and plants them eyes on her, and gives her a look, like are we doing this.]

Cilla: [She doesn't ALLOW herself to turn her thinking back on, even while she's just sitting in the car. That would be far too dangerous. But, when the car stops, and Boo just looks at her, she reads that unspoken question, and with the biggest sigh, she says nothing, but she just grabs him by the shirt and pulls him towards her, pressing lips together, and holding that kiss for at least twelve long, hard seconds. Then she pulls back, raising an eyebrow like, 'dOES THAT ANSWER YOUR QUESTION']

Boo: [Boo Warner had never felt so in over his head in his life, that was until Cilla kissed him once more. Just as a car ride was easy to calm him, there were her lips to remind him of everything he had missed out on. And as cruel that reminder happened in a car of all places, the look in her eyes sealed his fate. So she pulled away, and he pulled on the car door handle, and he was out in a matter of seconds, because there was no more waiting. they weren't kids anymore, there wasn't time to waste. He had a lady to kiss, even more, so when he circled back around the car to meet her, he pressed his lips so hard against hers, that sure she was raised up, and sure he was definitely lifting her up and it wasn't BEFORE LONG UNTIL makING OUT against the car got old, so there they go ACROSS THE ThreSHOLD OF HTE WARMER RESIDENCE, and torn acl? NOPE, against, the car, against the front doorway, and YEP.]

Cilla: [Again, everything seemed to be calling back to when they were teenagers. The car, the way she felt, the way she was being lifted up into Boo's arms, the fear that something was going to interrupt them. Everything was the same. She was no longer in control. Every action was a reaction to Boo, and yup, she was against a doorway. Was she now trying to get clothes off? You guessed it. Difficult, given she's pressed against a door. But she's trying with all of her might to get some form of clothing off. Oooooooh boy.]

Boo: [Where were his clothes? Mostly gone, yep. Her's? Surely, some were being ripped off now? And where were they? It was hard to keep track from all the bumping into furniture, and into hallways and out of them. There weren't words to express 1. how passionately, 2. how carefully, and 3. how intensely that boy-- or rather full grown man was handling that lady. There were too many emotions boiling over and he'd be cruel to stiffle any of it from that woman, so he didn't. With every kiss, with every touch, with every breath, he made sure that she was aware of how exactly he was feeling, felt, and would always feel. As there were so many emotions for her in the past- he'd admired her, he loved her, he hated her, but in every moment of his life, he'd always just wanted her. He was thankful that there on that kitchen table she was giving herself to him, or rather-- just her clothing, sh, in returen and surely if she wanted to she could take his heart and lock it away in that old locket of hers, seal it shut, and toss away the key. Just like their first time, just like every other time they had spent together with their bodies entwined it would never be enough to fully express how much that wonderful human being meant to him. So he placed careful nibbles at the nape of her neck as the wooden table served as a pillow to his head, I GUESS>]

Cilla: [Her head was swimming. With what? Too many things, and all of them about how she was feeling in this moment. Emotionally, that is. (Though...) She couldn't keep track of where they were, where various pieces of clothing had fallen, when the last time she took a breath in was... She was lost; one hundred percent, completely lost. And, really, it all felt too much like a dream. (One that she'd had-- too many time over the past 12 years.) But it had to be real. It had to. Because while it felt like a dream, it also felt too /real/ to not be reality. The dreams never felt like this; never had this much pure emotion. Because, suddenly, she was sixteen again, and every touch Boo gave felt like the first one all over again, and it was like she was floating. Because, everything made her remember just /how much/ it had never been over, or would ever be over. It made her realize that this was an inevitability. So, when his lips moved to her neck, giving her a chance to speak, though completely breathless, here we go--] I want to make you-- forget you've ever /ever/-- been with anybody else. It's just me.

Boo: [She spoke, and her words sent tingles up his spine. TINGLES. HELP. BUT Little did she know that it was already just her. Or it would be, from now until he was old and dead. Nail in the coffin, as he nodded, because, Princess, go on, and make me forget, k. so in between breaths his lips found their way back to hers, and his hands surely pinned hers against that stupid dumb kitchen table-- until finally he scooped her back up in his arms and they were moving again, and headiNG toWARDS THE BEDROOM. with her legs wrapped tightly around his waist, help bye. ican't]

Cilla: [Ups-a-daisy she goes, wrapped up around him again in a lovely quick trip to the bedroom, with lots of kisses along the way. Then she's on a bed, and now that she's not pinned down somewhere, she's going to take this opportunity to roll herself on top, and this is where the forgetting starts, because boy howdy, she's not a little sixteen year old anymore, damn it. She is a GROWN-ASS WOMAN, and she knows what she's doing. So, her hands are going to his hair, and her lips are going to his neck. And forget chaste pecks, son. That's not happening here. Nope. The goal here is to leave Cilla marks. M a n y Cilla marks. This is her territory. Deal with it.]

Boo: [So, sure, there they went, crashing down into the soft mattress, or rather-- there went Boo. He was joined,of course, and in her natural state, Cilla Dodgeson was driving Boo Warner completely insane. Mark after each and every mark, he grew restless, and it probably showed as his fingers were completely tangled in her hair. So he dealt with it. Yeah, because he had to, but it wasn't for long, as he was determined to rip the remaining clothes off of that woman. And once they were, he kissed her once more. It was a peck of a kiss, and he pulled away to catch his breath, but somewhere in between, his eyes landed on hers, and even more so, it all came flooding back. The memories. That feeling inside of him, that juvenille, young feeling of complete happiness-- the one feeling he'd lost so long ago, when he lost her. It came back. So he stared for as long as patience allowed, until he finally kissed her, tenderly as he pressed her closer to him and definitely rolling them over and definitely bye]

#locked #needed it here #apologizin for spam

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