#sorry I’m always so obsessed with how her first word was bouncy

[bigboobyhalo]

dapper’s first word!! <3

#sorry I’m always so obsessed with how her first word was bouncy #like not only is bouncy such a badboyhalo thing to name a pet #but also it was dapper naming his first of many MANY pets #it’s so cute and so fitting

[just-a-poor-boy-queen]

I've had a really hard day today and I saw someone wanted more Jimary crack, so I decided to write it to cheer myself up. I hope three fics in a row isn't too excessive. (All credit goes to the anon who suggested this.)

--

‘She’s drunk.’ Joe said very matter-of-factly, lifting his wine glass to his lips, only to discover there was nothing left in it.

‘Very drunk.’ Replied Phoebe, reaching for the bottle nearby and giving them both a refill.

It wasn’t as though they had never seen Mary drunk before. She was usually all giggly and bouncy after a few drinks, perhaps more talkative than usual and, in Joe’s opinion, far less uptight. But they had never seen her like this; her eyes heavy lidded, downing her wine like it was water and clumsily swaying to the music that filled the busy lounge, stumbling every now and again to keep her balance. She was clearly taking her break up with Piers very badly.

‘Freddie’s livid.’ Joe murmured, glancing over at the singer who appeared to be deep in conversation with Peter Straker, but kept glancing over at the intoxicated woman who was trying to coax Brian into dancing with her, much to the displeasure of Anita. ‘Prepare yourself for a screaming match later on.’

‘I already have the popcorn ready.’

Mary eventually gave up on Brian and loudly announced she was heading into the kitchen for another bottle of rosé, almost stepping on Delilah as she staggered through the door. She surveyed the kitchen a moment, the room spinning as her alcohol consumption finally caught up with her, before she noticed Jim sitting alone at the kitchen table, trying unsuccessfully to uncork a large bottle of champagne between his knees.

She had always been a little jealous of Jim. Before he came along, she had always held out hope that Freddie might return to her one day, discover he wasn’t actually into men or something daft like that. But then this Irishman appeared, who wasn’t like Freddie’s other boyfriends; for the first time, it seemed like Freddie was in love and ready to settle down, happy in a way she had never seen him before. It had been hard for her to accept; but when Piers had finally had enough of her obsession and left her, she realised that she would never be able to properly move on with her life if she kept latching on to the past. She had to let Freddie go. She had to accept that, while they would always be friends, Freddie was gay and what they had all those years ago was over.

Jim noticed her hovering and looked up, giving her a small smile. ‘Enjoying the party?’

Mary hummed in response, going to the cupboard where the booze was kept and digging around until she found the rosé she was looking for. When she looked back at Jim, he still hadn’t managed to remove the cork and was quietly cursing under his breath in his thick Irish accent.

It was quite a nice voice, her inebriated mind told her.

‘You have a lovely voice.’ She suddenly said aloud, her words slurred. She wobbled up to him, heels clinking against the kitchen tiles as she unscrewed the top of the rosé bottle. ‘Where is it you’re from again?’

Jim blinked at her dumbly. He wasn’t used to Mary initiating conversation like this; she was usually so reserved. ‘Um, a town called Carlow. It’s near Dublin.’

‘It is, isn’t it?’ Mary drawled and without any warning, she suddenly plopped herself down in Jim's lap, making him jump in surprise. ‘Ireland is sss-such a lovely place. Lots of sheep there.’

Jim’s face went red, and he carefully set the champagne bottle down on the table. ‘Yeah, I suppose there are.’

Much to his horror, Mary put the bottle of rosé to her lips and began downing the drink ruthlessly, not stopping until it was almost half empty. When she finally stopped, she carelessly abandoned the bottle next to the champagne and turned around to stare Jim directly in the eyes, her smile disturbingly wide.

‘You have beautiful eyes.’ She garbled, moving her finger as if she was going to poke them out, but she instead ended up giving him a weird boop on the nose. ‘And your arms are so big.’ She reached down to squeeze his bicep, giggling like a schoolgirl. ‘I bet you’re really strong. Remember when you lifted me up at Freddie’s birthday party?’

Jim remembered. He was so plastered that night he had almost dropped her on her head.

‘Are you feeling alright, Mary?’ he asked warily, not comfortable with how close their faces were.

‘I’m wonderful, Jim.’ Mary giggled again, though it sounded a little manic. ‘I really, really want to dance. Will you dance with me, Jim?’

‘I’m not much of a dancer, Mary.’ Jim coughed, glancing over his shoulder in hope that someone might come through the kitchen door and save him.

‘That’s not true! I’ve seen you dance!’ Mary insisted, pulling at his hands, ‘come on.’

Jim didn’t have the energy to argue with her, already a little tipsy himself, and he allowed her to drag him into the middle of the kitchen, face filling with colour as Mary threw her arms around his neck and sagged all of her body weight against him. He realised rather quickly that if he let her go, she’d probably fall face first onto the floor and never get up again.

The next five minutes had to be the most uncomfortable of his entire life, as he swayed in awkward circles with his husband’s ex-girlfriend, mindfully trying to keep his hands off her waist. He wasn’t a religious man, but in that moment, he prayed to every God in existence that someone would call him from the lounge and rescue him from this predicament.

Mary suddenly lifted her head from his shoulder and whispered in his ear. ‘Marry me, Jim.’

The Irishman stared down at her, eyes comically wide. ‘Beg your pardon?’

‘Marry me.’ Mary grinned at him, leaning so close that for one horrible moment he thought she might try to kiss him. ‘We can have lots of beautiful Irish babies together.’

Jim sighed. Next time they had a party, he was going to replace Mary’s wine with Ribena. ‘I’m very flattered by your offer, but there are two problems; I’m gay and I’m married to Freddie.’

‘Oh bugger.’ Said Mary, as if she had forgotten that detail. ‘You can still marry me though. We can run away to Cardiff together.’

‘Carlow, Mary.’

Her face suddenly fell and she stepped away from him, looking betrayed. 'Is it because of the cats?'

'The what?'

‘That's why you don't want to marry me, isn't it?’ Mary's lip trembled as if she was about to cry. ‘Freddie has cats and I don't!'

‘Mary, I’m going to get you some water.’ Jim replied, making a beeline for the sink.

‘No, don’t leave!’ Mary grabbed his sleeve, trying to tug him back. ‘Stay with me, Jim. I'll buy you all the cats you want!’

‘You’ll feel much better after drinking this.’ Jim said firmly, pouring a glass of water and turning around to hand it to her. As soon as he did, her lips were suddenly pressed against his own, arms locked around his neck so there was no escape as he yelled against her mouth in surprise.

‘Mary!’ he roared, as soon as she released him, half the water having spilled onto the floor during the struggle. ‘What the bloody hell are you playing at?!’

Mary grinned; lipstick smudged across her face, so she looked like the Joker. ‘I’ve never kissed an Irishman before. Does that make me Irish now?’

Before Jim could even answer, she suddenly dry heaved; he grabbed her and stuck her head into the sink as she vomited up the contents of her stomach.

--

‘What the fuck happened?’ Freddie demanded, as Jim walked into the lounge, his shirt ruffled, a smear of red lipstick on his mouth and a very drunk Mary giggling uncontrollably in his arms.

‘Your ex-girlfriend asked me to marry her, then threw up.’ Jim replied, as if this was a normal occurrence. ‘I’m going to put her in one of the guest rooms so she can sleep it off.’

He turned and walked out of the lounge before anyone could respond. Freddie clenched his glass so hard it was a miracle it didn’t shatter in his hand.

‘I’m going to murder her!’ he growled, lunging towards the door, only for Phoebe to grab him from behind and hoist him up. ‘Let me go! That backstabbing homewrecker is trying to abscond with my husband!’

‘Take it easy, Fred.’ Phoebe said calmly, holding onto the man effortlessly. ‘You can kill her tomorrow.’

‘Yeah, we haven’t even had dessert yet.’ Said Joe, holding onto Freddie's legs to stop him from kicking. ‘I spent all fucking day slaving over that baked Alaska, you’re eating it whether you like it or not!’

Firstly, I am so sorry you are having a hard day. I feel terrible that whilst you are doing so much to entertain us with this outrageous crackship, you are not having a good time. I can just hope that writing these stories bring you as much joy as they bring us.

And now, the fic. I AM WHEEZING. First of all, I fucking love Joe. Even though we've never heard him speak, or ever listened to his words through his own perspective, I feel that your characterisation is so realistic. His dessert comment slayed me lmao.

And oof, Mary being drunk off her ass is my new favourite trope. And lmao her thinking that Jim doesnt want to marry her because she doesn't have cats😂😂😂 Leave him alone, Mary. He doesn't want to have irish babies with you.

And hahahahaha Freddie's reaction is as epic as I had envisioned. And god, this is another nightmare that Jim isn't going to recover from soon.

This is such a fantastic crackship, omg. I absolutely loved this💙💙

(More drabbles by writer anon)

Also anon, if you ever want to talk, you can always dm me, if you are comfortable of course🧡

#ask response #jim hutton #freddie mercury #jimary #crack ship #anon writing #phoebe freestone #joe fanelli #brian may #anita dobson

[tellmealovestory]

That Summer (1/?)

Summary: You’ve spent every summer since you were a child in the idyllic beach town you call home three months out of the year. This summer should be no different except for the addition of Bucky Barnes. Sparks fly upon first meeting, but it’s only a summer fling, right? Modern AU.

Notes: Also posted on my ao3. The beautiful divider I used is from @whimsicalrogers​

Warnings: Surprisingly no swear words and a very brief mention of sexy times. 

Mosquitos battled with the scratchy blanket beneath your body in a fight over who could do more damage to your sensitive skin. So far it was a tie. Music drifted out of your car speakers, a bouncy pop song, something meant for being blared at top decibels in a darkened club, sweaty bodies moving together, colorful drinks filled to the brim of expensive glasses. Not something for laying in a field an hour outside of the city stargazing.

It was a warm night, a promise of what was to come as summer began its lazy descent. Summer. Just the word always conjured long days, lazy nights, uniforms of shorts and tank tops, bare feet. Frozen slushees from the local convenience store staining lips and teeth and tongues blues and reds and purples, bags of potato chips and handfuls of candy bars. Windows rolled down, music turned all the way up, singing off key to lyrics that seemed as if they were written for you and only you as you drove aimlessly through the city before venturing onto the back roads that would take you far from the bright lights and the familiarity of your life to somewhere else.

The crinkle of a candy wrapper being balled up, the obnoxious slurp of a straw searching for the last remnants of a cherry slushee mixed with vodka had your teeth grinding in annoyance at your sometimes friend sprawled out next to you on the blanket.

“This is your last night here and this is how you choose to spend it?”

You didn’t have to take your eyes off of the stars shining and twinkling above you, winking like they held secrets, like they knew what the future, more specifically what this summer would hold for you to know she was rolling her eyes at you.

And while you tried to tell yourself you didn’t care her tone still stung.

“You didn’t have to come,” you pointed out, leaving out the part about how she only came because her sometimes boyfriend ditched her again. “And it’s not like I’m not coming back. It’s only for the summer, remember?”

“Whatever. Have fun with your summer friends,” she sneered, tone icy, piercing straight through the warmth in your chest.

It was harder this time to hide the physical way her words stung. Flinching you inched away from her on the blanket. You weren’t a mean person, but you still thought about getting in your car and abandoning her here.

Ignoring her huffed sighs, the slurp of the straw, the way she boldly reached across you grabbing your plastic cup still half full with the blue raspberry slushee you kept your gaze focused on the sky above you.

A bright streak danced across the sky, so quick if you had blinked one second sooner, if you had turned your head away from the sky you would have missed it. Your heart sped up at the sight, awe and doubt mixing in your mind. Blindly grabbing for your friends arm you excitedly pointed at the sky, blabbering about the shooting star.

Obsessed since you had learned about them in school books had been consumed, online articles inhaled, paintings painted, stories written, but you had never expected to see one.

In the blink of an eye it was gone and you were left wondering if you had seen its beauty at all.

Closing your eyes you inhaled damp grass, the alcohol infused breath of your sometimes friend, the sugary sweet slushees, the salty potato chips that swirled around you and made a wish on the brightly burning shooting star that had streaked across the sky for that one glorious brief moment.

I wish to fall in love this summer.

“You’re not mad are you?”

Your eyes were glued to the scenery that shot past your windows. The large mansions that sat dotted on the beach before giving way to gift shops and tourists traps. The ocean that glittered and shined when the bright sun hit it. The sand that had you itching to beg Wanda to pull the car over so you could run through the burning heat before dipping your feet into the still cold ocean water. Tires hummed on the road, salty ocean air inhaled, wind rustling against your hair and ruffling your shirt.

After stepping off the plane, smile on your face, sweat soaking through your shirt at the heat that hit you as soon as you had stepped out of the air conditioned terminal you had run straight into your best friends arms squealing like preteen girls at a boy band concert.

The conversation had flowed easily with her pointing out the new shops, restaurants, the gossip you had missed out on when you had left at the end of last summer. It wasn’t until the conversation had drifted to the evenings plans that it began to stall.

Your first night back had always been a girls night with take out food, homemade desserts you had brought with you, bottles of soda when you were younger that turned into shared bottles of wine, trashy television shows as you caught up with each other’s lives in person instead of over texts and skype.

This year however plans had changed.

“I’m not mad.” It was hard to be mad when you would be spending the next three months in paradise, but you were disappointed.

You had always looked forward to the first night together to unwind, to catch up, but now you were going to be spending it with their friends feeling like the awkward out of towner struggling to keep up with their inside jokes, their familiar banter.

Tearing your gaze away from the scenery you turned your attention to Wanda offering her a small smile. It was only one night.

“It’ll be fun!” Wanda chirped.

Showered, fresh faced, damp haired, bags piled high on your bed in Wanda’s spare room a quick girls night had commenced with Natasha. Gossiping over chips and dip the three of you had made plans for the summer before piling into the car heading to the party.

Christmas lights were strung throughout the house and on the back porch leading the place to have a whimsical feel. When they had told you a party you had been expecting wall to wall people, red solo cups, couples making out, drunk people stumbling and laughing.

What greeted you instead were motorcycles parked in the driveway, along the tree lined streets. Loud music spilled from the peach two story house. A few people stood outside, bottles of beer held between fingers, thumbs furiously scrolling through phones, leather jackets adorning shoulders despite the oppressive heat.

Everybody seemed to know who Natasha and Wanda were. It was impossible to take two steps without someone coming up to say hey. Introductions were made, but the more people you met the more the names and faces blurred together.

Ending up in the kitchen leaning against the counter, a bottle of warm beer pressed into your hand your eyes swept over the small crowd that clustered around the keg. More leather jackets placed on shoulders, animated conversations swirling around you, cigarette tips burning bright orange, smoke exhaled leading the kitchen to be filled with a hazy fog that made your head ache with fatigue.

Weight shifting from foot to foot, beer bottle sweating with condensation in your hand, strangers nodding in your direction in lieu of hellos. You were used to standing on the sidelines, watching everything and everybody with a keen eye, but it didn’t make it any less lonely.

Pushing through the scattered bodies of the kitchen you slid open the patio door inhaling the pine trees that surrounded the back yard, the salty ocean air that could be faintly smelled in the distance. The night air was muggy, the sky dark, the stars twinkling and as you stumbled to the railing you closed your eyes willing the fresh air and the stars to ease your loneliness.

“Careful there.”

Your body froze at the husky voice that dared to break your peaceful solitude. Shoulders tensed you exhaled, slowly opening your eyes to see a tall man, dark hair pulled into a man bun, cigarette dangling from kissable lips. He was beautiful standing there in the glow of the Christmas lights that were strung along the railing.

Convinced he was talking to someone else you turned your head, gaze inspecting the patio, the yard, but it was just you and the dark haired stranger.

A long drag off the cigarette, a quirk of an eyebrow and he was speaking again, voice low and gravelly. “You good?”

“Uh yup, yeah, great, thanks,” you rambled, loosening your hold on the railing. Worried that he’d think you were drunk you whirled around to face him, watching the way his beefy body leaned against the porch railing a few feet away from you. Caring what people thought about you, trying too hard to make everyone happy around you were were faults you had yet to overcome. It didn’t matter that you didn’t know him you still found yourself, to your horror, blurting out, “I’m not drunk!”

Exhaling a stream of smoke he stubbed out his cigarette. “Never thought you were.” His lips tilted upwards, a ghost of a smile on his face, a wisp of hair falling from his bun and framing his face.

“Right,” you said slowly. Shifting your weight from foot to foot you cleared your throat determined to start over on a better note. “I just... my friends left me alone for a couple minutes and I guess I sort of panicked and needed some fresh air and I didn’t know you were out here and... you’re laughing.”

It was rich, the kind of laugh a person could fall in love with. Throaty and hoarse like he had used his voice up on talking all day though you suspected it had more to do with the cigarettes. So far he appeared to be a man of few words.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to.”

The only thing better than his laugh was the way he stepped closer, the floorboards of the porch creaking beneath his clunky black boots as he closed the gap of space between your bodies.

Up close he was even more striking. Sculpted jaw, cheeks painted the lightest shade of pink that reminded you of spring roses, eyes so bright they rivaled the color of the ocean. Tight black tee shirt that you hinted at the built body beneath it, black leather jacket that matched the other ones inside of the house. Blue jeans that you somehow knew hid a perfect ass.

It was impossible to take your eyes off of him, but the feeling appeared mutual as his eyes lingered on your hair, your makeup free face, the thin strapped summer dress you had thrown on with a pair of sandals.

Had it been any other man standing before you, stare lingering you would have felt self-conscious, would have crossed your arms over your chest and cleared your throat before politely making an excuse and scurrying away.

It was reckless and dangerous. You didn’t know him, but instead of being put off by his staring you felt strangely... okay with it. You didn’t know him, had never seen him during any of your previous summer visits, but there was something familiar about him tugging at your heartstrings as if you already knew him, as if you guys had known each other your whole lives. It was a feeling you had never experienced before. You didn’t even know his name, but you couldn’t help feeling that this man was somehow going to be important to you.

Maybe it was jet lag, too much cigarette smoke, thrown off your usual first day rituals, but being in his presence made you feel alive, made you feel like you could truly be yourself. You didn’t have to be the perky, can fix anything, people pleaser that made you a such a good fit working at your moms wedding planner company. And you didn’t have to be the awkward fly on the wall third or fifth wheel when out with your friends. You felt like you could be yourself, whoever that was and it was freeing.

Inhaling the muggy night air you met his gaze. It was electric, inviting and you found yourself wanting to plop down on a lawn chair and spill to him all your secrets.

“Can we start over? I’m Y/N.”

“Bucky.”

Cheers erupted from inside the kitchen, but neither of you turned to look. In a matter of minutes the party was forgotten and you were fine with that.

“You new in town?”

“It’s that obvious?”

There it was, that smirk again, gentle lift of his shoulder in a shrug, another piece of hair escaping his man bun. In a way you supposed it was obvious. It seemed as if everyone at the party were wearing leather jackets with the words Howling Commandos stitched on the back and everyone had known who Natasha and Wanda were.

“Small town,” he said. “I know most of the people here, but you I don’t know.”

“Not true. I introduced myself before,” you quipped, feeling a sense of pride when he let out another throaty laugh. “Are you the welcoming committee in town? Cause if you are I gotta say you’re not doing too good of a job hiding out here.”

His laughter filled the porch and in that instant you knew you’d do anything to hear it again and again. It was so warm like feeling the sun on your bare skin the first time after the end of a long winter.

“Maybe I was monitoring the situation out here. Gotta make sure no one comes barreling out and runs into the railing. Don’t want anyone getting hurt on my watch.” His eyes drank you in slowly, a smile cracking through his smirk waiting to see your reaction.

Biting back a laugh you shook your head at the banter feeling both out of your element, but somehow so at ease. “I’d say you need a little more work.”

“You do, huh? I dunno I thought my methods worked. Got you to stop didn’t it?”

“Total fluke.”

“You sure about that, Y/N?”

The way he said your name had your heart beating straight out of your chest. He said it slowly, letting it roll across his tongue, confidently as if he was used to chatting up girls, making them feel special for a night or two. His hand moved to the railing, his pinky finger nudging yours. It was a light touch, barely a touch at that, but the electric sparks it was emitting had you itching to grab him by the collar of his leather jacket and kiss him.

Consumed by the way his barely there touch had you feeling you didn’t notice at first the way he had stepped closer, close enough that you could smell the smoke from his earlier cigarette, the beer that he must have been drinking mixed with something woodsier. Your favorite scent had always been coconut, but now... now it was whatever was wafting off of him.

“So you know why I was out here, but why are you out here?” You asked softly, not wanting to speak too loudly and break the spell. Your gaze flickered from his eyes to his lips and back. His gaze followed suit.

“Told you why I was out here,” he murmured, voice just as low, fingers ghosting over your hand, circling your wrist.

Your eyes darted down to watch the way his long fingers danced over your bracelet. Resisting the urge to close your eyes at the relaxing touches you flinched when the patio door slid open, loud music spilling out, louder voices shouting in the distance, a drunken couple stumbling out the doors, lips attached, hands roaming.

“That’s why I’m out here,” he grumbled.

His words could have been referring to anything, but when his head turned to stare disdainfully at the couple tearing each other’s clothes off oblivious to their surroundings you murmured an ah understanding.

“Should we...?” You asked, words trailing off when the woman let out an embarrassingly loud moan that rivaled that of a pornstars.

“C’mon.” His large fingers circled your wrist giving it a gentle tug.

You didn’t know him, but that didn’t stop you from following his lead as he led you down the patio steps and around the house to the front yard. The grass was cool when it rubbed against your ankles, laughter and bottles mixing and clinking together could be heard drifting from the open windows. The moon was only a crescent, but it somehow seemed to shine brighter out here than it did back home.

The front of the house was empty, but the line of motorcycles still lingered. Leading you to the front porch steps he sat down, gesturing for you to do the same.

“I’m disappointed, Bucky.” Turning your head to the side you caught a flicker of that beautiful smile that laced his lips and your only hope was that with your next set of words you could coax out another hearty laugh.

“Yeah? Why’s that?”

“As head of the welcoming committee in town you really should have welcomed them instead of running away.”

Bursting into laughter at the groan he let loose you nudged his shoulder trying hard to settle the way your heart sped up at the contact.

“Stick around long enough and you’ll be seeing more of them than you ever wanted to.”

“I feel like there’s a story behind that.”

“Maybe I’ll tell it to you sometime.”

“Maybe I’d like that.”

A motorcycle roared to life before racing off down the street. A group of guys carrying cases of beers stepped around you and Bucky entering the house, their raucous and drunken laughter filling your ears. The moon subtly shifted its position in the sky. But through it all, the distractions that flitted around you urging your attention elsewhere your focus never left each other’s eyes as if you were magnets drawn to each other and in a way you supposed that was true.

“Bucky!”

The voice was impatient as if they had been trying to grab his attention for awhile now. The spell you had fallen under was broken. A muttered curse word under his breath, a thin line of his lips, his head tilting to the side glaring at the man who had interrupted him, another piece of hair slipping from his bun.

For a minute no words were spoken and you felt caught in the middle, torn between ushering him towards the man calling his name and staying out of it.

“When you get done making googly eyes at your girl over there we could use your help in here, man.”

Staring down at your lap you tried to hide your smile at the way he had referred to you as his girl. You barely knew Bucky, certainly didn’t know his friend, but that didn’t stop the pattering of your heart or stretched smile.

“Sounds serious,” you commented, eyes lifting up to his.

“Probably a fight,” he muttered. Running a hand through his hair he heaved a sigh. The reluctance to leave was written across his face and you were pleased that the feeling was mutual.

“You should go. You know make sure nobody’s barreled through the railing out back,” you teased. The last thing you wanted was for him to leave, but it was the right thing to do. Even so that didn’t stop the stinging in your chest or the worries that this would be it, the first and the last time you saw him.

Standing up he exhaled a slow stream of breath. “Yeah,” he murmured lowly, more to himself than to you as if he had to talk himself into leaving.

Still, he didn’t make a move to leave. It was only when that impatient voice yelled for him again did Bucky yell back that he was coming.

“I’ll see you around, yeah?”

It wasn’t what you had been hoping for. You had hoped he’d ask for you number, maybe ask if he could see you again. Swallowing your disappointment you painted a smile on your face.

“It’s a small town, right?” You called out to him.

His smile was bright, lighting up the front porch steps. His laugh was rich, sending your heart racing. And when you turned around to get a final look at him your heart almost burst out of your chest when you saw him watching you too before he disappeared into the house.

“Wow,” Natasha smirked, arm looped through Wanda’s they strolled down the front steps coming to a stop where Bucky had been only moments before. “For someone who wasn’t excited about the party looks like you were enjoying yourself quite a bit.”

Keeping quiet for a second you struggled to gather your thoughts as Wanda looped her arm through yours and you began an unsteady walk back to the car. Choosing your words carefully you said, “It was... better than I expected it was going to be.”

Most of your experience with parties involved attending wedding receptions and those weren’t for enjoyment, those were part of your job working quickly to settle feuding family members, making sure to hand out coffee to the people toeing the line of tipsiness and embarrassingly drunk. In high school you had only ever gone to a couple parties too worried about your classmates would think of you to ever truly let loose.

“You should have given him your phone number,” Wanda said. Unlocking the car and unlocking your arms you slid into the backseat your head resting against the headrest, your fingers pushing the button that lowered the window.

“All done.” Natasha’s smirk was wide as she stared at you in the rear view mirror before starting the car.

“Natasha!” You yelped. “You can’t just give guys my number and don’t you think if he wanted it he would have asked?”

The radio blared to life as the car started, a semi familiar song blasting from the speakers, tires thrummed on the road, the mugginess of the night rushing in through the open windows.

Wanda reached forward to turn the volume down, but Natasha swatted her hand away. Their laughter mixed with the pumping bass flowed to the back seat where you smiled softly at them though they couldn’t see you.

“He was going to. I’m sure of it,” Wanda said. Twisting in her seat to face you her expression was open, tone confident and despite your own doubts about his intentions or lack there of you believed her.

Closing your eyes you let the music wash over you, your mind replaying the nights events over and over again.

Tags;

@nacho-bucky​

@redhairedfeistynerd​

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky x reader #my writing

[currently-in-fanfiction-hell]

Days at the Hunter Base, CHAPTER 5: The Zero Fanclub (originally from my Quotev account)

It was a normal day at Hunter Base.

Too normal, in fact.

Despite it being so long since the last major Maverick incident, X, Zero and Axl still weren't used to the peace and quiet. Funny, since that's what the Hunters strive for, but they'd become so accustomed to the havoc that peace seemed to worry them.

So whenever an opportunity comes by for them to do anything at all, they'd take it up, in this case, it was going grocery shopping for Dr. Cain.

"Man, ever since when did we become his personal caretakers?" Axl stretched his arms out, all that shopping tired him out, all of them never expected a grocery list to be so long, in fact, they were taking a break at a nearby cafe, they were that tired.

"Axl, it's not his fault that his actual caretaker turned out to be sick with the flu, besides, it's not like he'll be able to manage all of this grocery shopping by himself, be considerate." X scolded him.

"Besides, you told us that you wanted to tag along, so it's not like you didn't have a choice, so stop complaining." Zero added, "At least it's all over now, all we need to do is drop this off at his place, right?"

"Yep," X nodded, "I haven't visited him in a while, so I hope you don't mind if we stick around a bit longer."

"No problem at all." Zero said, then he proceeded to look at Axl with a stern gaze, "Right, Axl?"

"R-right!" Axl stuttered, while he'd been a Maverick Hunter for long enough to get used to Zero's glares, they still, and always felt...intimidating.

"Great!" X smiled, "Let's not keep him waiting."

_______________________________________________

They proceeded to walk out of the cafe, enjoying the nice afternoon breeze, when suddenly...

"OHMIGOSH!!! IS THAT ZERO?!" The high-pitched squeal of a teenage girl was a complete surprise to all of them, a moment later, a young, female Reploid ran up to them, or to be more specific, she ran up to Zero.

"Ohmigosh, are you really Zero?!" Her squealing became even more high-pitched, to the point where it sounded like she practically lived on helium.

She was bouncy, energetic, and couldn't stop fidgeting, she was also sweating all over.

And they thought Axl was energetic, this was a whole new level.

"Uhhhh...Yes...?" Zero responded rather cautiously, he was used to getting attention from journalists and the press, but for all of...this to come out of a young teenage Reploid?

...Wait, he thought, oh, great, not one of those again...

The girl's grin grew even wider, if that was even possible, "OHMIGOSH! IT REALLY IS!!!" she then motioned a signal to something behind her, yelling, "GIRLS! IT'S HIM! IT'S REALLY HIM!! COME HERE!!! WE FOUND HIM!!!!"

...a whole group?! 

X and Axl proceeded to back away slowly, but unfortunately for Zero, he wasn't able to do the same, a storm of teenage girls (both humans and Reploids) came out of an alley and ran up to him, bombarding him with squeals, questions, and adoration.

"I LOVE YOU, ZERO!!!"

What?

"KISS ME, ZERO!!!"

Huh?!

"ZERO!!! SIGN MY FANFIC!!!"

F-fanfic?!

Zero's face just stayed in a state of shock, this wasn't the first time he met someone like this, but to see so many in one place... it was overwhelming, to say the least.

X was watching this disaster unravel before his very eyes, his face in a state of pure horror, someone needed to help Zero, but X was the one carrying the groceries, which meant he had to choose between helping him or keeping the groceries safe, being the good person (or Reploid) he was, he dropped the groceries on the ground and ran up to help his best friend.

"Take care of the groceries for me!" X called out to Axl, who quickly grabbed the bags, without thinking, he rushed to where Zero was and grabbed his arm, Zero, who was understandably sweating bullets by now, turned around and saw Axl mouthing the words, "Follow me!" they looked at X, who nodded, knowing what to do.

_______________________________________________

While Zero and Axl ran from the angry crowd, X tried desperately to calm them down, before the angry teenagers could chase Zero down, X blocked their way, the entire crowd stopped and went quiet.

Thing is, now he couldn't tell whether he made things better or worse.

The Reploid leading the pack clenched her fists, "Grrrr.... LET US SEE ZERO!" She yelled, the rest of the pack raising their fists in the air.

X would rather be anywhere else right now, but he learnt from experience that you'd have to stay calm if you want to handle hyperactive teens.

X sighed deeply, then said as clearly and sternly as possible, "Not until all of you explain yourselves." he paused, "I don't want to resort to violence, but I will if absolutely necessary, so can all all of you co-operate with me?" He took another deep breath and hoped that things would slowly resolve peacefully-

"HOW DARE YOU INTERFERE WITH OUR PLANS OF MEETING ZERO?!" One of them yelled, the others shouted simillar things in agreement.

They started trying to push past him, but he somehow managed to keep them from going on a rampage.

...Unfortunately, life, as he should've figured out ages ago, was never that simple.

_______________________________________________

MEANWHILE...

_______________________________________________

The two were escaping the crowd so quickly that it was all a blur to Zero, all he knew was that he needed to run, fast.

Eventually, they found a hiding spot in an alley, Axl put down the groceries that he had held in one hand, the other he had used to hold Zero's hand as they were running away.

After a few moments of catching their breaths, Axl turned to look at Zero and said, "Zero, I've never seen you like this before, you'd usually keep your cool around admirers, but I've never seen you- well, you know what I'm talking about."

"Well... yeah, I would, but there's just...so many of them." He panted, still exhausted from running.

"Heh, I suppose so." Axl said, "Y'know, Zero, to be honest, I think it's kinda obvious that you'd have obsessive fangirls stalking you."

"Hm? What's that supposed to mean?" Zero asked, what was so special about him? He was just another Hunter doing his job, that was all.

"Eheh, Zero, it's actually kinda suprising that you don't know." he said,  "You've just got those qualities that fangirls seem to love."

"O-okay..." Zero stammered, he didn't know why he was the one people seemed to be attracted to, and he didn't care, he just hoped that X could manage the mob all by himself.

What was he thinking? Of course X could manage it, if he managed to defeat Sigma multiple times by himself, then of course he could manage a crowd of screaming fangirls.

"...Hello? EARTH TO ZERO!" Axl yelled, Zero immediately snapped out of his thoughts.

"Zero, this is no time to be zoning out!" Axl told him, "We'll need to get back out there before X becomes roadkill!"

"Yeah, you're right." Zero said, "I don't want to give him any more trouble than I already have, besides, I think I've calmed down a little." He paused, looking at Axl, "So? Hurry up, we don't want to keep him waiting, do we?"

"Y-yeah, right!" Axl grabbed the grocery bags and quickly followed behind Zero, he hated being rushed, but it was understandable in this case.

_______________________________________________

Eventually, Zero and Axl caught sight of X, who was currently holding back against the tackle of an angry fangirl (and resisting the pull on one of his feet thanks to another), they stopped and let go at the sight of the two other Hunters.

"Zero, Axl! Thank goodness both of you are back! I was really worried about you two, plus I wasn't sure how much longer I could hold b-" X was interrupted by heaps of incomprehensible screaming, "ZERO!!! OHMIGOSH, I'M SO HAPPY THAT YOU DECIDED TO COME BACK! CAN YOU TAKE A SELFIE WITH ME?!"

X yelled out loudly enough for the two Hunters to just barely hear him, "I'm sorry, Zero! I tried reasoning with them, but I think they'll only listen to you!"

"It's alright, X, I'll handle this." Zero stepped forward, the fangirls were  getting closer, "Okay, can any of you explain this?" He said as sternly as possible, something he was thankfully very good at.

One of the fangirls stepped in front, she seemed to be a mixture of shy, anxious, nervous and timid at the same time, she might've been the most sane of the crowd, "'Uh, Ummm, w-where do I start?! Uh, it's just t-that we're all your biggest fans. a-and w-we started a club dedicated to fangirling, all a-about you, of course," she was getting red in the face, obviously embarrassed, "I-it started off with just t-talking about you and writing s-silly fanfiction, but over time. we started doing m-more, ummm, questionable things, like..." Her voice trailed off, "Like...what?" Zero asked, not realizing that he had probably made one of the worst mistakes in his life, he could hear Axl give him a sigh of disapproval in the background and X backing away slowly.

The girl was a stuttering mess by now, the words at the tip of her tongue, but they wouldn't come out, perhaps it was for the best, Zero thought.

"You don't have to, it's fine, if it makes you feel that uncomfortable, then you should stop." he said, everyone sighed a breath of relief, Zero was glad that he dodged a bullet there.

"Anyway, I suppose I should ask you, how'd you manage to know where I was?" He asked, hoping that it was just stalking, and nothing else-

"Um- uhhhh.... I-we...ermmm..." her face was getting hot and sweaty, and was almost, if not redder than Zero's armor, suddenly, one of the fangirls from the crowd raised her voice.

"It was only a matter of stalking, sheesh, why are you such a mess?"

Someone else spoke up, "...And in order to do that, someone thought it was a good idea to break into Maverick Hunter HQ."

The club leader was getting red in the face, "H-hey!  It's not l-like we had any other options! Besides, it w-was a decision we a-all agreed on!"

The timid fangirl, the first to speak up inhaled, and then said, "No, it wasn't!  You FORCED us to agree! And even then, only two others volunteered for the break-in!"

Axl decided to speak up, "Besides," he said, "Wasn't there a better, more sane option? Wouldn't any normal human being- or Reploid just, I dunno, walk up to the nearest person and ask, 'Hey, do you happen to know where Zero was headed?' You know, something that DIDN'T involve breaking the law?"

"NO ONE ASKED FOR YOUR OPINION, LOSER!' The club leader screamed.

"Okay, I just want everyone to stop," X raised his voice, "Can we just talk it out without a second of shouting?"

"..."

"Alright," Zero continued interrogating the group, "So you broke into Hunter Base, and how'd you find out where I was?"

"Oh, we broke in, grabbed some purple-haired Navigator chick by the neck and asked where you were headed." 

Purple-haired Navigator... could it have been... Layer?!

"Y-you what?!" All three of them were shocked beyond any further wording.

One of the fangirls also decided to speak up, "You almost got arrested there! We saw it all through the side window!"

"But at least we didn't!" The club leader yelled, her sapphire eyes giving an angry glare.

Finally, X decided to get his point across, "So, what I'm getting here is that you broke into HQ without any sort of authorization and threatened a Navigator who had little to nothing to do with this, on the chance that she knew Zero's location, that's punishable by law!"

"Yeah!" Axl joined in, "You could get arrested by the police at any time now- wait, we basically are the police!" He smirked.

Zero smiled, "There's no need to arrest anyone, Axl, look at who's coming."

They all turned their attention to several Ride Chasers with the Maverick Hunter logo on them, Zero flashed a quick thumbs up towards a Hunter he recognized from his own unit.

"Sorry 'o keep 'ou waiting, sir." He apologized, "There was a bit o' a delay tracking 'em down, Didn't even expect you to be involved in this! Did anything bad 'appen to you, sir?"

Zero shook his head, giving another small smile, "There wasn't any trouble at all, don't worry." X shot him a look that was somewhat angry and teasing at the same time.

"That's good to hear, sir, now if you don't mind me, I'll 'ave to arrest these folks, HQ's probably gonna let 'em off with a bit o' the ole' interrogation, well, minus the ones who broke in an' threaten'd that Navigator, 'ope that lass is alright."

While a few members were kicking and screaming as they were being handcuffed, the rest accepted their punishment with no problem.

Before they were taken away, Zero decided to say one last thing, "You know, if you asked nicely without the aggresiveness, I would've been glad to give an autograph or something."

One of the fangirls turned around and said, "We know, well most of us, anyway, but thanks for putting an end to Liz's madness, most of us were too terrified of her to object to anything."

Liz turned out to be the Reploid leading the club, she was screaming agressively, trying to free herself of the handcuffs.

Zero laughed a little, "No problem, I hope this'll be an important lesson for all of you."

_______________________________________________

"Hey, Axl, Remind me to request higher security once we get back to HQ." X said as they were walking to Dr. Cain's house, it was already late in the evening, he was probably already worried sick.

"Sure, we don't want anything like that to happen ever again, after all!" He grinned.

"By the way, Axl, I remember you telling me that I have qualities that fangirls seem to love." Zero said, "What exactly did you mean by that?"

"Hm? What's this? Something I missed out on?" X smiled.

Zero told him what had happened in the alley.

"Well, I can certaintly see what Axl meant by that." X nodded.

"Hm?"

"Well, to answer your question, Zero," Axl grinned, "You're insanely cool, and not just character-wise, they probably have a thing for your hair and the rest of your appearance, too."

"Oh, this?" He looked at himself, "I really don't see what's so appealing about it, looks too flashy to me."

"Riiight, clearly whoever made you cared more about your design than fixing your agonizing unawareness issue." Axl groaned.

Axl took out his phone and opened up some sort of social networking app, X and Zero stared to look at what he was doing.

Soon enough, he opened up some sort of tabloid profile, one of their latest posts was a poll titled, "Which of these Maverick Hunters is the Hottest?" And surprise, surprise, all three of them were the poll options.

It hadn't even been out for a day and the poll already had over 10,000 votes, Zero ranked first with 71%, X with 10% and Axl with 19%.

"See? Told ya, Zero, people go crazy for the hair." Axl grinned.

 Zero wasn't sure whether to be flattered or embarrased to rank first, he didn't look that good to people, did he?

No matter, it didn't matter if he was the most attractive or not, what mattered most was whatever he was tasked to do in the present.

Eventually, they reached Dr. Cain's house, way later than they thought they'd be, of course.

"So all of you are finally here! I was getting very worried, did something happen?" The old archaeologist asked.

"Let's just say that we ran into a bit of...trouble." Zero forced a smile.

"No matter, I'm just glad you managed to come, thanks for taking care of the groceries, I'm sure I can count on you again, right?" He chuckled.

"Dr. Cain, I'm sorry, but with all due respect, never again." Axl said.

_______________________________________________

(Author's Note): I had a bit of writer's block writing this chapter, but I managed to get it done! I wanted to write a chapter with the kinda-4th-wall-break about Zero having fangirls, it took a long time to finish this one because I had to change some major plot points along the way, it was tiring, but I think it was worth it!

#rockman x #megaman x #mega man x #mmx #mega man #megaman #rockman #fanfic #fanfiction

[speckofglitter]

crush culture - crs

- requested by @animejaem -

Word count,, 2k

Genre,, fluff, not that angsty but still kinda emo i guess

You absolutely hated crush culture. Every single one of your friends had spent the majority of their teenage years hung up on a guy or a girl that they thought was ‘the one’. Ultimately none of those relationships ever lasted. You didn’t understand why people would waste their time trying to make someone else fall for them when they would have to deal with heartbreak sooner or later. Having to be in a romantic relationship with someone just felt too suffocating anyways. In short, you didn’t understand everyone’s obsession with romantic love, forcing chemistry when they knew the equation wouldn’t add up in the end. You were content with your love for your friends, family, role models and hobbies. You didn’t mind feeling lonely once in a while.

You throw on a yellow hoodie, blue jeans and converse on, grabbing your bag as you get ready for another grueling day of college classes. You were majoring in visual communication. As soon as you got to class, you looked for your friends chaeyeon and eunbin who usually saved you a seat. You spotted them in the middle of the lecture hall, sliding between seats to reach them. On your way, you accidentally bumped into someone.

‘Oh i’m so sorry’ he immediately apologized, reaching down to pick up your fallen belongings.

‘No worries.’ you smiled at him, walking off to go join chaeyeon and eunbin. You greet them, taking out your notebook. Throughout the entire lecture, you noticed someone kept giving you looks. As you turned to your right you saw the same boy you had bumped into immediately put his head down, blushing furiously. You giggled, amused at his shyness. Chaeyeon immediately poked your leg with her foot.

‘Hey, what are you laughing at?’ she smiled at you, taking a sip of her iced coffee.

‘Oh nothing, it’s just that i bumped into this guy earlier and i saw him staring at me. What a cutie.’ you laughed, looking back at him to see him eagerly taking notes. You had never seen someone look so interested in a marketing lecture before.

‘I’m pretty sure everyone would agree that raesung is cute you’re not special sis’ she retorted following your eyes as she shamelessly winked at raesung who just smiled back.

‘Wait, you know him?’ you tilted your head, confused.

‘Oh my god y/n you must live under a rock. Raesung is well known on campus. He has a youtube channel and he posts covers. He’s an amazing singer, rapper and dancer. In conclusion, you just met an icon and it seems like he likes you.’

‘We just met, i highly doubt it. Besides i’m not interested in dating anyone. I will check out his channel though’ you retorted, turning away from chaeyeon’s nosy ass to pay attention to the lecture again.

-

You were in your bed about to go to sleep when you decided to search up raesung’s channel name ‘gongjuboi’. You had no idea what that meant but as soon as you listened to his music, you realized the name didn’t matter because damnn this boy was talented. You stared out of your dorm room window, wondering if you would ever be this talented. You had decided to study visual communication against your parents’ will but you didn’t seem to be improving much since classes had started.

-

The second time you met raesung was at the campus bookstore. You were looking through the racks of books on visual communication for your next assignment when you both grabbed a book at the same time. He immediately took his hand off, apologizing.

‘I’m so sorry you can take it’ he muttered.

You recognized him immediately, ‘you know, for a youtuber you’re really shy in real life huh? It’s really fine you can have it raesung. I’ll probably illegally download a pdf or something’ you commenting. You waved at him before walking away, your platform doc martens clunking away.

Raesung’s heart was beating so fast he could probably use it as a beat for his next song. You had watched his videos.

Raesung was the complete opposite. He was a hoe for romantic love. All of his songs had been inspired by someone that he either had feelings for or at least a crush on. He was the type of person who went to sleep and dreamt of falling in love. It was now happening all over again, because of you.

-

Raesung was at the studio, dark lighting looming over him as he finished up a song. It was about you. He had been producing the track for 2 hours and writing lyrics for 1 hour. He recorded the track, immediately uploading it onto his youtube channel.

Meanwhile, you were in your room getting ready for bed. Fridays were usually the start of the time of your life. For you, that meant eating pizza in your bed as you caught up on the latest episode of grown-ish before falling asleep. You mindlessly scrolled through your subscription feed as you got a glass of water. Your finger came to a stop as you saw the raesung’s username appear on your phone. You immediately clicked on the video, curious to see what magic he had made.

The song was slow and sensual, his voice giving you chills as he sang the words. The lyrics dripped off his tongue like honey.

‘Let’s take our time tonight girl, above us all the stars are watching.’

You heart was beating fast as the song came to an end. You were completely unaware of how you had gotten into this mess. You thought you were loveproof. Maybe you had thought wrong. It wasn’t just physical attraction. You had always known raesung was attractive. He was tall, he had a charming smile and an athletic body. But now… now it almost felt like there was a gravitational pull between the two of you. You had never felt this way before. A fire was brewing inside of you and there was nothing you could do about it.

‘There's no reason to hide, what we're feelin' inside’

Those words resonated in your mind the entire night. That night, you fell asleep with someone on your mind for the first time.

-

The next morning you decided to act like last night had not happened. You got dressed, getting your camera and strolling out of your dorm, steps bouncy as you looked for a target. You had an important assignment for your advertising class and you were determined to make it amazing. You were thinking of going for a vintage style ad. You went around the city, taking photographs and videos of various things. As you walked in the art building, you came across an old television with a broken screen. It looked nothing like the perfect and ideal image that a vintage ad would want and yet you decided to take a picture of it. It reminded you of yourself.

After a few more hours of the same ritual, you decided to head home and start editing your project. You settled on a completely different vibe, using the television as a background as you edited the words ‘crush culture’ in a retro font on top of it. You were really liking how it looked but it was definitely not enough to impress your professor. You needed audio. You thought of what would fit the concept, your mind immediately wandering to raesung’s voice. You placed your head in your hands, ruffling your hair. You were frustrated that you would have to see him but it was the obvious choice. You decided to call him before you could change your mind.

He picked up after three rings.

‘Hey, who’s this?’ he asked brightly.

‘Um hi, this is y/n. I just wanted to ask you a favor if that’s ok with you…’ you trailed off.

‘Oh y/n? um yeah sure whatever you want.’ he coughed out.

‘So i have a project to do for my advertising class and i would love it if you could narrate my ad. I listened to your music and i think you have a beautiful voice’

Raesung paused for a second, shocked. He wished you could feel how fast his heart was beating right now.

‘Thank you.. And um i’d love to narrate your project. Do you have like a script or something?’ he questioned.

‘Well i have an idea but i wanna know how you feel about it. How about we meet up at 5pm at the campus café?’

‘Sure, see you there y/n.’

-

When you got to the café, raesung was already sitting down, scribbling intensely in a notebook as he sipped what you assumed was a matcha latte. When raesung wrote, he had a special kind of hunger in his eyes. His fingers moved fast, almost like he was typing. You sat down across from him, waiting for him to notice your presence. You peeked over at his notebook.

‘The girl with the heavy steps’ you cocked your head, reading aloud.

‘OH MY GOD YOU SCARED ME’ he yelled out, rushing to close his notebook.

‘I’m so sorry you just looked so focused.’ you laughed heartily.

He smiled, scratching his neck nervously.

‘So… my concept is about crush culture. I’ve never really understood the concept of dating. I feel like i’ve been surrounded by couples that had their relationships and were happy for a while but they all eventually ended. I feel like love is so temporary that i’m not sure there even is a point in dating at all. All this love just seems so suffocating. I want to express that idea in my ad.’ you explained, taking a sip of your black coffee.

Raesung listened attentively as you spilled your guts out to him.

‘Well, i had no idea you were so skeptical of love. I don’t personally agree with everything that you said but i think i know how i can make the audio for the ad. Is it okay if i take you to my studio?’

‘Of course.’ you jumped up from excitement, sliding your bag over your shoulders.

-

Raesung got straight to work as you arrived at his studio. He sat in one of those rolling chairs, scribbling a few notes in the same notebook while you got your laptop out working on the editing. A short 30 minutes later, he was finished.

‘Ok, i’m gonna sing the song i wrote for the ad, just let me know what you think’ he explained.

You nodded, sitting patiently as he got in the booth, ready to record. You fell into a trance as you watched him sing. You literally couldn’t take your eyes off of him.

‘I’m not falling for you, cause this baby is loveproof.’

You slightly shivered as he glanced at you while singing this particular line. As the song came to an end you smiled, clapping loudly.

‘That was… everything i wanted and more. Thank you so much.’ you complimented, excitedly grabbing raesung’s hands.

‘Thank you. So i’ll send you the recording and we can look at the final product.’ he replied, blushing as he realized you were still holding his hands. He looked down at your hands on top of his. You followed his gaze, promptly putting his hands down.

You watched the final product together, the both of you amazed at how good you were at your different art forms. Your vision had finally come together.

‘Thank you again raesung. I’m positive this is one of my best works and i couldn’t have done it without you. Especially since the message behind it was kind of personal…’ you mumbled nervously.

‘No problem. I love working with you. But i just wanted to say, love isn’t always temporary. I hope you find someone who can make you feel like you deserve to be loved everyday.’ he gently stated.

‘Like you?’ you whispered.

‘HUH? ME?’ he yelled out, confused at your sudden question.

‘I mean, you’re the only person who’s ever made me feel like romantic love was worth it. I’m sorry if you don’t feel the same, that would just be confirming my original hypothesis anyways.’ you sighed out.

‘No no i do feel the same. That’s why i was so surprised. I’ve liked you since i met you. Since you walked away from me with your loud ass boots. Since you laughed at me in marketing class.’ he chuckled.

You smiled up at him, squishing his cheeks before you leaned in and kissed him. Raesung was your first kiss and it was a lot better than you had expected. He held you like a prized possession, lips sweet like cherries. Kissing him felt like summer. You weren’t used to feeling like this. You’d never felt so alive.

-

heyo hope you guys like it 🎀🌹love you all 💖✨

••

masterlist - requests are open !!

- ya girl tiyi 💖

#choi raesung #millennium #yg entertainment #yg silver boys #yg silver boys scenarios

[letspartyrightnowplease]

Yes, Chef

ao3!

Chef Lester was everything Dan wanted. To be. Everything Dan wanted to be. Obviously. That’s why he was here to learn and not gawk at the very, very good looking chef, who, if you asked Dan, was an exceptionally good teacher. Dan would know because he’d been here a month and yeah, now even he can make food that’s pretty damn great. And he used to burn noodles.

Chef Lester was obviously a miracle worker, as well as a miracle. Seriously, how does someone look that good in a chef’s outfit? Dan didn’t know if he had a thing for men in uniforms. There was that policeman at his school that one time. Safe to say Dan had to leave quite abruptly after that convocation.

And okay, so maybe Dan wanted the chef just a bit. Alright, a lot. He couldn’t deny it at this point. Unless he was seriously thinking about becoming a professional cook one day, he definitely didn’t need the extra classes. He had finished the beginners class last Friday, the day he had told himself he’d move on, and look at him now: Starting the next level of cooking lessons taught by yours truly, Chef Lester—possibly the most beautiful man Dan had ever had the chance to meet. So yeah, he was a bit gone for him, but honestly he had reason to.

“Now maybe if we all stare at him, he’ll pop back into this universe.” Dan heard, his gaze settled unblinkingly at where he presumed the last place Chef Lester had been. “Or, you know, he’s a lost cause.”

At the sound of laughter Dan tuned back in, blinking a couple times and then meeting the eyes of one Chef Lester. He smiled automatically. “Sorry, Chef. To be honest, today’s lesson just seems a bit boring.”

Chef’s face contorted to one of small shock and then into a toothy grin. “Or maybe you’re just on your last two brain cells.”

The room erupted into laughter once more. And this is where he felt like his feelings were valid, because standing in front of him, dusted with flour and other ingredients, his bright smile set on Dan, was Phil and the whole room seemed to just fade away. It’d been a long month and an even longer three years since he’d had that kind of someone, and maybe he missed it, but he couldn’t deny these flowery, bouncy, glowing feelings. He couldn't deny that trying something new and falling for this silly man, who sometimes messed up even after literally being a professional, had been the best month of his life.

He offered up a wink to Chef before he turned and continued the lesson. Dan admired and respected him too much not to pay attention, and that’s another reason. He made Dan, literal embodiment of failure, into a pretty decent cook. Because he did pay attention, and Chef Lester was seriously good at what he did. He wasn’t like other teachers; he made things interesting and fun and laughed when he did mess up and took things maybe not as seriously as he should, but that’s what made him so great. He was real. He was real and up front and just generally a great chef all around. And maybe Dan was a little biased.

How could Dan not watch him knead dough? His forearms flexing, his shaky hands moving and rubbing and patting. How could he not watch as he measured so carelessly, his long fingers wrapping around utensils and spices like they knew their way around? How could he not listen to every word and instruction leaving his plump lips? Answer: he couldn’t.

Dan had this weird obsession with always needing whatever he made to be good enough, and when he first started cooking, he was absolutely terrible. Chef didn’t even try and sugarcoat it. He was just plain bad. And one day, when he hadn’t signed up for the next week’s cooking lessons, Chef had come out to talk to him before he left.

“Don’t forget to sign up for next week, I’d hate for it to fill up without you knowing.” He had said.

Dan had felt so guilty and his cheeks had flared red. “Actually, I was thinking on, not doing it anymore?” He knew that it sounded like a question, but he really hadn’t known what to say.

“Oh.” Chef had sounded disappointed. “Any reason?”

Dan had debated his next words wisely, not really knowing how to explain. “It’s just, I’m not very good at it. I feel like I’m embarrassing myself. And I’m falling behind now, too. It’s just not working.”

Chef had looked at him long and hard. “You’re quitting my lessons, my cooking lessons that are here to teach people who don’t know how to cook, to cook?” Dan had groaned and Chef had smirked.

“Well, when you put it that way—“

“What’s your favorite food?”

“Why is that—“

“Just, tell me your favorite food.” He had said, and Dan had once again thought about his answer.

“My mum makes a mean stir fry.”

“Send me the recipe, yeah?”

“Why?”

“I wanna show you what cooking and learning can really be like. And I’m signing you up for next week.” He’d left with that. He’d just stepped back inside and left Dan standing there with a racing heart that beat so quickly just for him.

After that, Chef Lester had paid a bit more attention to him, stepping into his area more and helping when he could and directing when he wanted Dan to do it. And Dan stared, and watched, listened closely, because sometimes Chef would say things just for him, he’d step closer just for him, he’d wrap his hand around Dan’s and help stir or knead or whatever just for him. And Dan loved it. He lapped it up like Chef Lester was his owner and Dan his loyal pet.

There had been a lot of trying to convince himself he wasn’t into his teacher. Like, way too much. Until Chef Lester had made things pretty clear.

It was after that class, the one where they had teased each other when Dan had stared off into space. They had finished making the pastries and Dan always stayed after to help Chef clean up. He’d always say that he didn’t need it, that he could do it by himself, but Dan never listened. Any time he could get alone with Chef was better than any long ride home alone.

“Hey Chef, where do you want these pans to go? The other cabinet is full.” Dan called out.

“Hey Dan, how many times do I have to say Chef isn’t my name?”

Dan shrugged. “It sounds cooler to be honest.”

“Your mum sounds cooler. And over there, under the pots, please.” He pointed into the direction of the other shelves and then went back to sweeping.

“Damn, man. Sick burn. I’ll be sure to slide your number to her.” He said while squatting down to place the pans onto the shelf.

“I’d rather you take it.” Chef had said. Dan had frozen when he has stood straight up. He felt himself blush and he turned around to find that Chef had walked just a bit closer. “Honestly, I’d give you anything. All you had to do was ask. I’ve been waiting for you to, but you never did.”

“What?”

“For anything. My number. My home address.” He smirked.

Dan could literally feel the gears in his head turning. His heart was beating as he watched Chef lean the broom against a counter and step forward.

“You know?”

“You don’t?”

“Ch—“

“I swear to God, if you call me Chef one more time…” He said as he walked even closer. He was right in front of Dan now, who was leaned against the shelves.

“S’what everyone else calls you?”

“You’re not everyone else, are you?”

Dan scratched the back of his neck. He felt like he was blushing all over. How does a person take a compliment like that? Phil really was too sweet. It was weird referring to him like that. He felt like he didn’t deserve to, but he wanted to. He really did.

“I guess not.” He finally replied. “You gonna do something about it?”

“If you’ll let me. If you want me to.”

Dan just nodded, taking a step to Phil, backing him up against a counter.

“I’ve wanted for too damn long. It’s more like a need now.” He was so close to Phil, he could feel his knees hit the other’s. He looked him in the eyes and felt a warmth wrap itself around Dan’s body.

“Yeah?” Phil said, leaning his head in, his voice quiet and deep.

“Yeah.”

They kissed. It was soft and tentative, a thing that they had been waiting for too long and finally they were experiencing it. Dan didn’t want to mess up. He wanted it to be good and God, it was. It was sweet and lovely and made his heart flip in his chest, but he wanted more. He leaned into the kiss and wrapped one hand around the base of Phil’s neck and the other slotted two fingers in his belt loop and they both tugged. The kiss got deeper and they got closer.

Dan pulled away at the first feeling of Phil’s tongue. That was too hot, too much. He didn’t know if he could handle that without getting worked up.

“Alright?” Phil asked, his hands squeezing Dan’s soft hips as he licked his lips. Like he wanted to taste Dan too badly to wait for his lips to come back.

Dan blushed, a zing ran through his body and he felt himself twitch. He leaned in further, and connected their lips in an open mouthed kiss, tongues immediately meeting together, and Dan moaned. It felt like Phil was licking his way down his body. He felt Phil hands slide further back and pull so their bodies were completely pressed to each other. Dan let both of his hands glide into the soft hair at the back of Phil’s head. He pulled away to catch a breath, but Phil didn’t stop. He continued his way to Dan’s jaw and scraped his teeth lightly on his neck and Dan moaned even louder and squeezed his legs together appreciatively.

“Phil.” He sighed after a moment of Phil’s neck kissing turning to pecks. He let his hands drop from around his neck, but Phil’s went up to cup each side of Dan’s smooth face. He leaned in and grazed his lips lightly to Dan’s before leaving one last kiss there.

“I think that’s the first time you’ve ever said my name.” Phil said, pulling back. He leaned against the counter again, but one hand wrapped around Dan’s so they could continue to touch.

“What, you don’t like it when I call you Chef Lester?” He batted his eyelashes and bit his lip. He watched Phil’s pupils dilate as he watched Dan and he smirked.

“Maybe sometimes.”

They were quite after that, just staring with fond eyes at each other.

“So, I guess I like you a bit.” Dan said finally.

“Me too. A bit.”

“Just a bit.” Dan confirmed.

“Can I, like, actually give you my number?” Phil said and they both laughed.

“Of course. All you had to do was ask.” Dan said and Phil rolled his eyes.

They exchanged numbers then finished cleaning up the kitchen area. It was mostly in silence as usual, except this time they kept catching the other staring, and when they passed each other they’d push the other against a wall or counter or shelf and kiss them senseless. It definitely took far longer than normal to clean up but neither seemed to mind.

When Phil was locking up, Dan stayed firmly behind him, just waiting.

“You promise you won’t quit my class now, right. I can’t lose my best student.” Phil said.

They walked down the steps and stopped at the end.

“Of course not, do you know how many chicks I can get with these cooking skills? So many.” Dan teased.

“Ah, I’ve taught you well my pupil.” Phil laughed. He smiled at Dan fondly then. “I really do like you. You’ve had my attention for far too long now. I was scared I’d missed my chance.”

“Well you haven’t, you’ve well and truly gone for it and it worked.” Dan said happily. He didn’t want the conversation to end, but it was late in the afternoon now, and he had to get home. They walked different directions from here, so this was goodbye. “I’ll see you next week, yeah?”

“Maybe sooner? What are you doing Saturday?” Phil asked boldly, hands in the pockets of his uniform.

“Nothing, actually, what did you have in mind?” Dan’s heart was beating fast again, unable to believe this was real.

“Dinner, and then maybe we can go back to mine.”

“Chef Lester! You think I’m putting out on the first date?” Dan said mock offended.

“A chef could only dream.” Phil joked.

“Well then, yeah, yes. I’d love to.” Dan said seriously, a light blush on his cheeks.

“Great, I’ll text you.” Phil said, the same blush creeping up on him, too.

Dan didn’t know how to say goodbye. Should they hug? Kiss? He liked the sound of that so he went in to hug Phil and felt warm arms wrap around him. When he pulled back, it was only a little so he could land a smooch on Phil’s lips. They smiled and pulled apart, then they walked their separate ways, turning back with equally dorky grins on their faces.

Dan sighed as he walked home. A long, but wonderful day. He couldn’t believe it to be honest, but then again he knew that they had been playing a game of cat and mouse for quite a while. He couldn’t wait for their date, and he couldn’t wait for after their date. He blushed just thinking about. He wanted it, he wanted Phil, and he was glad he could finally have him.

#phandom fic fest bingo #phanfiction #phan fluff #cooking lessons #phan #phandom #dnp

[biskarsgards]

In Essence

Summary:I got a suggestion that I should write about Bill breaking up with his ex and wanting to be with you.

Warnings: sex and language

Pairing: Bill x Reader

Bill had been outside with her for hours. It was always so interesting how a person could piece a whole conversation together without hearing a single word.

His jaw was clenched when he was talking to her and he was passionately gesticulating. You tried to listen to everything Jonah was saying to you but you kept turning back to the conversation. You wondered why they were fighting this time around.

Even in your mind you never said her name out of the pure jealousy and contempt in your soul. You had been in love with him before her beautiful green eyes and bouncy blonde hair had even met him. She was crying, sobbing into her palms. You wanted to go outside and see if she was alright but you sat and drank your Chai latte.

He shook his head and went inside the cafe. She wiped her eyes on the back off her hand and looked at the pavement. You finally gave in and walked outside to console her.

“ Are you alright?” you inquired. The sun was setting and the whole sky was pink and red like it was on fire. You heard the sounds of the city and was almost taken away by the soft cool breeze.

“ I’ll be okay,” she sniffed. It was hard to see her like this, especially since you both knew each other for a few months.

“ What happened?” you tried not to sound to nosy.

“ I hurt him again,” she admitted. She played with her hair as she spoke, her eyes red and bloodshot. Even as tears rolled down her pale cheeks she looked beautiful and pristine. She was like the pinup girl that all the boys in high school drooled over.

“ Again?” It was getting chilly and you wrapped your cardigan tightly around your body.

“ He’s in love with you anyway,” she sighed. She crossed her arms and looked up at you.

All you could do was swallow and stare at her blankly because you doubted that was true. You and Bill shared a thousand phone calls where he confessed his love for her. You thought that she said it out of spite and you chose to ignore her.

“ I’m sorry, and if you need me to drive you home I will,” you offered.

She shook her head,“ I have my own car.”

“ I’ll see you around?” you hated saying that to people that you would never ever see again. She nodded and looked at her phone, probably looking at jade rollers or something because Bill told you that she was obsessed with them.

You went inside and saw Bill putting money on the table. “ We are just about to leave.”

“ Are you okay?” you questioned. You were surprised at his nonchalant attitude and mannerisms. He was talking and laughing with Jonah like nothing had happened.

“ Jonah has to leave but I was thinking that we should have a sleepover,” he said, winking. You rolled your eyes, you hated how he snored whenever he was over and how he took all the blankets.

“ Perfect,” you mumbled. You replay were planning to home and watch a lame documentary and go to bed.

“ I’ll ride with you since my driver left me,” he explained. He picked up your car keys off of the table and you both said your goodbyes to Jonah.

“ How are you today?” he asked. He was never one to ask a question unless he intended a full and deep conversation, but you wanted to think. You wanted to think about what she said to you and how to process it.

“ I am good, and you?” you replied. He put the key in the ignition and started to back out of the parking lot. It was weird how he always insisted to drive your car even though it was yours.

“ She cheated on me again,” he said dryly. There wasn’t any tears in his eyes or even a mournful expression on his face. He just focused on the road and clenched his jaw.

“ I’m so sorry Bill, you don’t deserve that,” you sighed. Your heart broke for him and you wondered how she could break his heart like that.

“ Don’t be sorry.”

If he was yours you would never get him and make sure he was always happy and beaming. You wanted him so badly that it hurt but you had to let go so many times that it left you numb.

“ She said something crazy,” you laughed. There was an acoustic song with a lot of whining on the radio and you turned it down.

“ Oh my God, what?” he was smiling and you were happy to see it.

“ That, um, you were in love with me.” The car was engulfed in silenced and the smile on your face instantly melted. He kept driving and didn’t even acknowledge you.

“ Bill?” you wanted him to laugh it off and say that she was being crazy, but he didn’t.

You pulled up in the parking lot of your apartment complex. “ Let’s talk about everything when we get inside.”

You nodded in response, suddenly filled with a mixture of paralysis and anxiety.

It was always so interesting how he remembered the little things about you like your favorite ice cream flavor or your favorite parking spot. He parked and took the key out of the ignition. You wanted to ask him more questions but you knew he wouldn’t answer.

The walk to your apartment felt like you were walking up a mountain and your head was spinning with questions. Your hand was shaking as you tried to turn the key to unlock your apartment.

“ It’s a little messy,” you said.

He shrugged,” It always is.” You jabbed him playfully on the shoulder but he didn’t reciprocate your smile.

“ Yes,” he said it so quickly that you instantly became confused.

“ Yes to what?” you inquired.

He filled his eyes and took off his jacket.” I’m very in love with you.”

You stood in your foyer stunned and you kept reminding yourself to take deep breaths. You wanted your lips and vocal chords to produce a coherent phrase but you were so tongue-tied.

He walked over to you and grabbed face. “ I- I- I’m so confused and happy,” he whispered. When his lips touched yours your heart beat so fast you felt like you were going to pass out.

“ I’m sorry for kissing without asking,” he apologized. He was waiting on you to say something but you didn’t know how to say that you loved him too.

“ I want you,” you finally said.

Bill nodded,” I want to give you everything and I know it’s overdue.”

He you kissed him first this time, it was anxious and violent kisses. You were both pulling each other’s belts and knocking things over before you even got to your room.

“ I’ve wanted this so long,” you admitted.

“ I’m all yours,” he replied. He slid his hand down your pants and you whole body shook with a pleasure you never felt before.

Your legs brushed against his jeans and you felt his throbbing erection.

“ You really want me?” you asked.

He kissed your collarbone gently. “ I want you so bad.”

There is a certain excitement and anticipation associated with peeling someone’s clothes off.

You couldn’t wait to have his skin touching yours. You grew wet with anticipation. He had no idea of the times that you touched yourself before you went to bed at night, craving his kiss.

He pulled your panties down your legs and kissed down your thighs. You never felt such pleasure and warmth from a single action.

His fingers brushed against the lips of your pussy before he delved his tongue inside of you. You trembled with pleasure as he licked against your clit.

“ You taste so good,” he mumbled. You where in heaven and all you stared at was his bobbing head. With every bob he was pleasing you and giving you life. You held on to the sheets and started perspiring.

He paused his godly deeds and looked up at you,“ Do you want me inside of you?” You nodded weakly, you were so tongue tied. You tried to recall all the events of the day but everything happened so fast that you couldn’t pinpoint one particular memory.

He crawled up your body and kissed your lips. He was kissing you so deep and long that you could taste yourself.

He entered you gently and put his hands on both sides of your body. His rhythm was slow and and satisfying.

“Am I pleasing you?” he breathed. You mumbled in response unable to speak.

“ I love the way you’re so tight for me,” he sighed

He buried his head in your neck gently kissing you as he thrusted inside of you. Your noises were so loud but it felt so good that you didn’t even care.

“ I love you,” he breathed. You didn’t care how he came to this realization that all you wanted was him. The thrusts were blissful and passionate. Every thrust felt like it was bringing you closer to God.

You felt the tingling begin in your toes. You didn’t want to cum yet, you wanted to prolong everything. You stifled back your moans and tried to control your breathing.

He smiled, his hair was dripping with sweat.” Don’t you wanna come sweetheart? he asked. You swallowed and shook your head.

“ Don’t hold back, you deserve it,” he whispered. His breath and rhythm were staggering, he was close as well.

“ I-I just can’t hold on,” you stuttered. The sensation spread across your body and time felt like it was slowing. All you could think about was Bill. His soft kisses and thrusts or how he always made you laugh and gave you kisses on the cheek.

“ Oh-oh my God I love you,” you squealed.

His warmth filled your insides. You never wanted anything more than to be with him. He filled you up and brought air into your aching lungs.

“ Was I good enough for you?” he inquired.

“Perfect,” you said, panting. You were rubbing your neck before he took your hands off and did it for you.

His hands rubbed out every knot in your neck and it was almost as intimate as the lovemaking.

“ Why are you in love with me?” you asked. You were waiting for a watered down and diluted answer.

“ I always have been, even when we were kids,” he explained. “ You never gave me the time of day.”

You rolled your eyes,” If you looked past all blonde white girls, I was always there.”

He laughed,” I told her I loved you when we were outside. It made her cry.” You turned to look at him suddenly feeling guilty.

“ I think that this was the best sex I’ve ever had,” he admitted.

You nodded, “ I’m starving now.” You didn’t have a lot to eat today.

He thought for a moment,” I’ll take you out today.” You smiled at the thought of going out with Bill.

“ Do you think we’re going too fast?” you were concerned about what people might think.

“No, I’ve been waiting for this all my life,” he whispered.

#bill skarsgård smut #bill skarsgård #writings

[sakurablossomstorm-blog]

teacher/single parent au

Here you go!

Also on ao3

~~~

It felt weird being back in a school, waiting outside of a classroom like he had been sent out and was waiting for the teacher to scold him.

It wasn’t like that at all. In fact, it was a parent/teacher night. And for Ben, he would be meeting his daughter’s first grade teacher. HE received the letter a week ago, telling all parents that Ms Knope wanted to meet each of them individually to ensure that everyone got a fair chance to talk to her about their children.

Honestly, Ben was hoping he’d be in and out within a few minutes, that he was aware of his daughter, Zoey, was well behaved. He never got a letter home telling him that she’d been bad and she always left school with a big smile on her face.

Ben always assumed that Ms Knope would be a stuffy old person. She always assigned homework, not much, just little assessments that involved some form of a talking animal with a speech bubble coming out of it’s mouth, telling them what to do. They were first graders, did they really need homework?

The door to the classroom soon opened and Ben looked up.

There she was, and she wasn’t old and stuffy at all.

Ms Knope had a head full of bouncy blonde hair and bright blue eyes. She wore a floral blouse and sleek black pants. Ben found himself gawking at her.

She smiled at him. “You must be Zoey’s dad?” she asked.

“Uh, yes,” Ben said as he stood up, adjusting his tie before shaking her hand. “I’m Ben Wyatt.”

“Nice to meet you, Mr Wyatt,” she replied. “I’m Leslie Knope, Zoey’s first grade teacher.”

She motioned Ben to come in and he took a seat opposite her desk. Leslie tucked a curl behind her ear and looked at the shelf behind her desk. There was a row of coloured binders. She hummed for a moment and then picked one off.

“Ah, here we go.”

Ben smirked. “Do you have binders on all the kids?”

“Yes,” Leslie smiled. “I like to be thorough and these help me keep them apart.”

She thumbed through the pages. “First off, Zoey is a smart, talented girl, and you must be very proud of her.”

Ben beamed proudly. “I am indeed.”

“She’s good at spelling,” Leslie said as she looked back up at him. “Her week point at the moment is multiplications, so it might help if you go through them with her a few times a week. We’re not doing anything too tough, only up to four times tables.”

“Okay, sure,” Ben replied, making a memo on his phone.

“She’s very artistic too, and loves drawing. She’s obsessed with Star Wars, which I’m sure you know. So most of her drawings are Star Wars related,” Leslie continued.

Ben smirked and nodded. “Yep, we love Star Wars in our family, her middle name is actually Leia.”

Leslie smiled. “I love that. Why didn’t you make her first name Leia? Let me guess? The wife wouldn’t let you?”

Ben hesitated. “Actually… Zoey’s mom… uh… left us when she was just a month old.”

Leslie gasped horrifically. “Oh my god. She died? I’m so sorry.”

“No, no!” Ben jumped in. “She left us literally… as in just got up one day and never came back.”

He cleared his throat. It was still a touchy subject remembering that day six years ago where Jessica said she was going to get diapers and didn’t come back. He was so worried, he called everyone she knew, until her parents finally called him, saying that she couldn’t handle the post natal depression anymore and wanted out. He saw her a few years ago, covered in tattoos and drinking herself into an oblivion.

Ben didn’t take Zoey over, he couldn’t. In their household it was just him and her. No one else mattered. He’d never let anyone else come into their lives again. He dated, sure, but honestly, he was content with Zoey just being in his life.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything,” Leslie said, nervously fiddling with a page on her binder. “I can tell it’s a hard subject for you.”

Ben looked at her. “What gives you that impression?”

Leslie smiled sadly. “You haven’t said anything in like five minutes.”

Ben made a startled noise and shook his head, getting thoughts out of his head. “Sorry, it’s just weird talking about it, that’s all.”

“Look, Mr Wyatt – ”

“Oh, please call me Ben.”

Leslie blushed. “Okay, Ben. You don’t have anything to worry about Zoey; she’s a great kid. Smart, funny, she’s got a lot of wit to her. Maybe a little too talkative sometimes but hey, we all have minor flaws.”

Ben chuckled at that. He sometimes found himself having to tell Zoey to be quiet after hearing her talk for hours on end.

“I’m really honoured to have such a sweet girl in my class,” Leslie said, and Ben felt small tears pooling in his eyes, he quickly blinked them away.

“She really loves you too,” Ben said, and Leslie looked surprised. “She always comes home from school talking about Ms Knope and how great Ms Knope is. I really can’t thank you enough for making sure she’s happy at school.”

Leslie grinned. “Oh, I’m just doing my job. I wouldn’t be doing my job is these kids came home from school miserable. I’m dedicated to making sure they have the best few years of their lives here.”

Ben leaned back on his chair, feeling a little comfortable. “Do you have kids of your own?”

“No,” Leslie looked bashful. “One day, hopefully. I’m still waiting for mister right.”

She looked away quickly. “Oh god, I shouldn’t have said that. Why am I saying stupid things today?”

Ben chuckled, and Leslie giggled along with him. Okay, she was really cute, and Ben found himself unable to look away from her. When she laughed her nose crinkled up and her teeth nibbled at her bottom lip slightly.

He felt it, a swooning feeling inside of him, something he hadn’t felt in years. Not since Jessica…

His thoughts were interrupted when Leslie gasped, looking at her watch. “Crap on a cracker. I’m late to see Mr and Mrs Langman. They really don’t like me, if I keep them waiting any longer they’ll report me to the school board again.”

“Again?” Ben asked curiously.

Leslie sighed. “I was teaching the children about marriages, and said that men can marry men and women can marry women. Their child, Maxwell, went home and told them and I was reported for it. According to them, gay marriage ruins marriage for the rest of us. What am I supposed to do? I have little Cassie in my class, her parents are both men.”

Ben looked surprised. “Wow. They really need to get a life.”

Leslie agreed, and watched sadly as Ben gathered up his things. She stood up and shook his hand.

“It was really great meeting you Mr Way- Ben.”

“Likewise, Leslie… I mean Ms Knope.”

Leslie giggled again and Ben’s heart soared. “Please, Leslie is fine. Only the children call me Ms Knope.”

Ben nodded and went to leave, but something pulled him back. Maybe it was the urge to keep Leslie from having to see the Langmans. But he still turned around.

“I was wondering,” he cleared his throat nervously. “If there was a policy on parents asking out their child’s first grade teacher?”

Leslie looked up and Ben’s words slowly made sense in her head and she blushed and gaped at him. “Um… oh… n-no there isn’t actually…”

Ben grinned at her. “How about I pick you up tomorrow night at 8?”

Leslie let a shocked smile grace her beautiful face. “That would be great. I’d really like that.”

She jotted down her number and handed it to him, allowing her fingers to linger against his briefly. “Here, call me after 6, I should be home by then.”

Ben nodded. “I will.”

He placed his door on the handle and gave her one last smile. “Good luck with the Langmans.”

He winked at her, leaving Leslie looking giddy and flushed.

Ben chuckled to himself, gave the unimpressed Langmans a friendly nod and walked back down the hall. The paper with Leslie’s number on it tucked safely in his hands.

#parks and rec fic #c00kie28

[lafayetteslattes-blog]

House AU Chapter Two

Pairing: Hamlaf (Hamilton/Lafayette)

Word Count: 1475

Trigger Warning: Swearing, self harm, depression, anorexia, paranoia, and a whole lot of mental disorders.

Note: I completely forgot about this AU but I’m halfway finished with the third chapter and then I’ll go back to the WJHS AU. And alternate between the two. And I’ll be posting some side stories on here as well, for each of the characters :)

Alex was bouncy as ever when he entered the common room. “Here we are!” Alex turned to Lafayette with a large grin. Laf was about to thank him and walk away, hoping that this would be the last time the shorter man spoke to him. But, again, he was wrong. “I’ll introduce you to everyone!” Alex clapped his hands together.

“Alexander!” A girl, only slightly shorter than Alex (who is pretty short), ran up to Alex and pulled him into a large embrace. She was wearing a blue dress with sleeves that stopped at her elbows, giving Lafayette (and everyone else) a perfect view of the scars the littered her wrists. Alex’s smile shrank but it was still there. He hugged the small girl back.

“Hands to yourself!” Lafayette turned to see Dr. Jefferson, sitting in the corner of the room, eyeing Alexander. Odd, Laf thought to himself. Alex pushed the girl off of him and gripped her shoulders, staring down at her.

“Now, you know the rules, Eliza.” He rubbed her cheek and she blushed. Lafayette was both confused and intrigued. Didn’t Alex mention a boyfriend? Maybe he swung both ways? Or this Eliza character was just obsessed with him. Lafayette waved off the last one, he doesn’t understand what anyone would see in the guy. Speaking of, Alex turned to Laf, “This is Eliza, and she’s closer to sane than anyone in this building.” He leaned in and whispered, “including the doctors, if you ask me.”

Eliza blushed and swatted Alex’s arm before sticking her hand out, “Elizabeth Schuyler, and you are?” Lafayette looked down at her small hand and his brow lifted. Eliza put her hand back down to her side awkwardly and turned around to walk away.

Alex laughed, “What a jokester, this guy!” He shook his head and walked over to another girl, same height as Eliza. Lafayette instinctively (although he had no idea why) followed after him. She was staring at the piano silently, “Peggy! How are you?” She blinked. “Good to see you can still hold a decent conversation, this is my new roomie, Lafayette! You can call him large baguette, though.”

“No, you cannot.” Lafayette stated. Alex laughed again.

“Don’t worry, Laf, she hasn’t spoken since she put in this place.” Laf? When was that nickname established? Lafayette shook his head and walked to the couch, next to a rather skinny guy with freckles that covered his face. “John, bud! Have you lost weight?” Alex asked, squeezing himself in between Lafayette and John.

Does this kid ever stop? Lafayette tried to scoot away, but was already against the arm of the couch. He and Alex’s legs were brushing against each other, but the younger one didn’t seem to notice. He was too invested in starting a conversation with the John guy. His fingers were playing with John’s curls and he was blushing. Why was he blushing? Did they have history? Why was this guy so skinny?

John took Alex’s hand and turned towards him with a smile, “Hola Alex, quién es este?” John nodded to Lafayette, who was really wishing he knew Spanish.

“Oh! John, meet Lafayette. Lafayette, meet John! He was my old roomie when I came here the first time… And second. But now, he’s roomed with Mulligan so I’m stuck with you. But I’m totally not complaining.” Alex’s smile never left his face. This guy smiles way too much. Lafayette’s going to have fun figuring him out.

“Ah, hola, Lafayette.” John held out his fist. So this guy wanted a fist bump? It’s different from the usual handshake, but Lafayette still wasn’t having it. Alex nudged John and he put his hand down, “Your names foreign, where are you from?” When Laf didn’t answer, Alex took it upon himself to answer for him.

“Laffy Taffy’s from France,” He sing-songed.

“Laffy Taffy?”

“It’s this thing Lex does when he makes new friends, he gives them nicknames.” John laughs and pokes Alex’s cheek. And then Lafayette said it.

“So you’re anorexic, huh? Isn’t that, how you say, a girl thing?” Lafayette smirked at the glare John shot his way. John stood up and stared at Alex before going over to one of the chairs set in the middle of the room shaped into a circle. Lafayette looked over at Alex but the sight before him was kind of shocking.

This is the first time Lafayette had seen (given the fact the he’s only known Alex for like twenty minutes) Alex without a smile on his face. He was actually stone-faced and looked pretty ticked off. “That’s my friend, Laf, you shouldn’t say things like that to people.” And then he stood up and walked to sit next to John, Eliza soon joining them. Lafayette looked at the three with suspicion but shrugged, seeing that he was now free from an annoying little (teenage) boy.

He spotted a piano and stood up to walk over to it. It was beautiful, really. But dusty. “Hasn’t been used in years.” Lafayette jumped and turned to see a muscular but short man with a beanie on standing before him. The man jumped as well but offered a small smile. “I was pissed when I found out too, I’d rather have no piano at all than have someone like him,” He gestured to John who was pretending to have injured himself, most likely for pain meds, “banging on the keys 24/7.” The man laughed and Lafayette smiled. Who’s he?

“Bonjour, I’m Gilbert. But I go by Lafayette.” He held his hand out. This time he was the one getting denied the handshake. The man flinched away as if Lafayette was going to punch him. Paranoia.

“I’m Hercules Mulligan.” Was all he said before going to take a seat on the other side of John. Thomas went to the seat next to him and was soon joined by a few other patients, there were two seats left now. Lafayette was guessing one was for Peggy, who was still staring at the piano. Lafayette felt like her eyes followed him everywhere he went. The other must’ve been for him. One was in between Jefferson and some guy who wouldn’t stop hitting himself in the head, although both hands were covered in layers of socks. The other was in between a girl who was holding a stuffed rabbit to her chest as if her life depended on it and (you guessed it) Alexander.

“Gilbert,” Thomas called out, “Time for group.”

---

Lafayette was able to figure out everything about everybody in the damn room. Eliza has (obviously, if you ask him) depression. John was anorexic. Alexander was bipolar (and just plain delusional, again, Lafayette's opinion). That Hercules guy was paranoid, thinking that the government was watching their every move. And then there was this Burr guy and his little girlfriend (?), Theodosia who both think their some kind of indestructible super heroes. He could tell that Burr was more convinced than Theo. Compulsive liar, maybe?

The thing is, no one could figure out why Lafayette was there. The guy seemed pretty "normal", a total dick, yeah. But other than that, he seemed pretty sane. He (along with Alex) didn't even take any pills at the assigned time. He sat and watched whatever Alexander was watching on the TV at the small corner of the room. Alex, by the way, forgave Lafayette (even though he didn't apologize) and was buddy buddy with him all over again. Even tried holding his hand. He ended up getting yelled at, but Alex's endless smile was there to stay.

It was now lights out. Lafayette, didn't know what time it was, past midnight, probably. But he couldn't sleep because of Alex's constant mumbling about King's college and losing his scholarship. "Could you please shut up?" Lafayette asked. Alex stopped for a few moments but then turned to face Lafayette's bed.

"Hey, Laf?"

"No."

"Did you go to college?" Alex asked, he sounded like a two year old. And if Lafayette wasn't so tired (and didn't hate Alex) he would've found it adorable.

"Never finished." Alex didn't pry after that.

"Hey, Laf?"

"What?"

"Can I sleep with you? It's just that... When I was roomed with John, he'd always let me sleep with him if either of us were having trouble sleeping. And you seem to have trouble and I could always use a cuddle and..."

"Alexander?"

"Yeah, Laf?"

"I'm having trouble sleeping, because you won't shut up."

"Oh." Alex turned onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, "Sorry." Lafayette sighed and turned to face the wall, pulling his blanket closer to him. After a while he was almost asleep when Alexander spoke again. "Goodnight, Laf. Goodnight, mom. Goodnight dad." And then he was snoring.

And if Lafayette muttered a small goodnight in return, nobody needed to know.

#house au #hamlaf #hamilton #hamilton musical #lafayette #house md #tw/self harm #tw/depression #tw/anorexia #tw/paranoia #john laurens #eliza schuyler #hercules mulligan #alexander hamilton

[jamesgeiiger]

He’s a ‘tech addict’ who works in the tech industry

BELLEVUE, Wash. — The young men sit in chairs in a circle in a small meeting room in suburban Seattle and introduce themselves before they speak. It is much like any other 12-step meeting — but with a twist.

“Hi, my name is,” each begins. Then something like, “and I’m an internet and tech addict.”

The eight who’ve gathered here are beset by a level of tech obsession that’s different than it is for those of us who like to say we’re addicted to our phones or an app or some new show on a streaming video service. For them, tech gets in the way of daily functioning and self-care. We’re talking flunk-your-classes, can’t-find-a-job, live-in-a-dark-hole kinds of problems, with depression, anxiety and sometimes suicidal thoughts part of the mix.

There’s Christian, a 20-year-old college student from Wyoming who has a traumatic brain injury. His mom urged him to seek help because he was “medicating” his depression with video games and marijuana.

Seth, a 28-year-old from Minnesota, used video games and any number of things to try to numb his shame after a car he was driving crashed, seriously injuring his brother.

Wes, 21, an Eagle Scout and college student from Michigan, played video games 80 hours a week, only stopping to eat every two to three days. He lost 25 pounds and failed his classes.

Across town there is another young man who attended this meeting, before his work schedule changed — and his work places him squarely at risk of temptation.

He does cloud maintenance for a suburban Seattle tech company. For a self-described tech addict, this is like working in the lion’s den, labouring for the very industry that peddles the games, videos and other online content that long has been his vice.

“I’m like an alcoholic working at a bar,” the 27-year-old laments.

——

“The drugs of old are now repackaged. We have a new foe,” Cosette Rae says of the barrage of tech. A former developer in the tech world, she heads a Seattle area rehab centre called reSTART Life, one of the few residential programs in the nation specializing in tech addiction.

Use of that word — addiction — when it comes to devices, online content and the like, is still debated in the mental health world. But many practitioners agree that tech use is increasingly intertwined with the problems of those seeking help.

An American Academy of Pediatrics review of worldwide research found that excessive use of video games alone is a serious problem for as many as 9 per cent of young people. This summer, the World Health Organization also added “gaming disorder” to its list of afflictions. A similar diagnosis is being considered in the United States.

It can be a taboo subject in an industry that frequently faces criticism for using “persuasive design,” intentionally harnessing psychological concepts to make tech all the more enticing. That’s why the 27-year-old who works at the tech company spoke on condition that his identity not be revealed. He fears that speaking out could hurt his fledgling career.

“I stay in the tech industry because I truly believe that technology can help other people,” the young man says. He wants to do good.

But as his co-workers huddle nearby, talking excitedly about their latest video game exploits, he puts on his headphones, hoping to block the frequent topic of conversation in this tech-centric part of the world.

Even the computer screen in front of him could lead him astray. But he digs in, typing determinedly on his keyboard to refocus on the task at hand.

——

The demons are not easy to wrestle for this young man, who was born in 1991, the very year the World Wide Web went public.

As a toddler, he sat on his dad’s lap as they played simple video games on a Mac Classic II computer. Together in their Seattle area home, they browsed the internet on what was then a ground-breaking new service called Prodigy. The sound of the bouncy, then high-pitched tones of the dial-up connection are etched in his memory.

By early elementary school, he got his first Super Nintendo system and fell in love with “Yoshi’s Story,” a game where the main character searched for “lucky fruit.”

As he grew, so did one of the world’s major tech hubs. Led by Microsoft, it rose from the nondescript suburban landscape and farm fields here, just a short drive from the home he still shares with his mom, who split from her husband when their only child was 11.

The boy dreamt of being part of this tech boom and, in eighth grade, wrote a note to himself. “I want to be a computer engineer,” it read.

Very bright and with a head full of facts and figures, he usually did well in school. He also took an interest in music and acting but recalls how playing games increasingly became a way to escape life — the pain he felt, for instance, when his parents divorced or when his first serious girlfriend broke his heart at age 14. That relationship still ranks as his longest.

“Hey, do you wanna go out?” friends would ask.

“No, man, I got plans. I can’t do it this weekend. Sorry,” was his typical response, if he answered at all.

“And then I’d just go play video games,” he says of his adolescent “dark days,” exacerbated by attention deficit disorder, depression and major social anxiety.

Even now, if he thinks he’s said something stupid to someone, his words are replaced with a verbal tick – “Tsst, tsst” — as he replays the conversation in his head.

“There’s always a catalyst and then it usually bubbles up these feelings of avoidance,” he says. “I go online instead of dealing with my feelings.”

He’d been seeing a therapist since his parents’ divorce. But attending college out of state allowed more freedom and less structure, so he spent even more time online. His grades plummeted, forcing him to change majors, from engineering to business.

Eventually, he graduated in 2016 and moved home. Each day, he’d go to a nearby restaurant or the library to use the Wi-Fi, claiming he was looking for a job but having no luck.

Instead, he was spending hours on Reddit, an online forum where people share news and comments, or viewing YouTube videos. Sometimes, he watched online porn.

Even now, his mom doesn’t know that he lied. “I still need to apologize for that,” he says, quietly.

——

The apologies will come later, in Step 9 of his 12-step program, which he found with the help of a therapist who specializes in tech addiction. He began attending meetings of the local group called Internet & Tech Addiction Anonymous in the fall of 2016 and landed his current job a couple months later.

For a while now, he’s been stuck on Step 4 — the personal inventory — a challenge to take a deep look at himself and the source of his problems. “It can be overwhelming,” he says.

The young men at the recent 12-step meeting understand the struggle.

“I had to be convinced that this was a ‘thing,”‘ says Walker, a 19-year-old from Washington whose parents insisted he get help after video gaming trashed his first semester of college. He and others from the meeting agreed to speak only if identified by first name, as required by the 12-step tenets.

That’s where facilities like reSTART come in. They share a group home after spending several weeks in therapy and “detoxing” at a secluded ranch. One recent early morning at the ranch outside Carnation, Washington, an 18-year-old from California named Robel was up early to feed horses, goats and a couple of farm cats — a much different routine than staying up late to play video games. He and other young men in the house also cook meals for one another and take on other chores.

Eventually, they write “life balance plans,” committing to eating well and regular sleep and exercise. They find jobs and new ways to socialize, and many eventually return to college once they show they can maintain “sobriety” in the real world. They make “bottom line” promises to give up video games or any other problem content, as well as drugs and alcohol, if those are issues. They’re also given monitored smartphones with limited function — calls, texts and emails and access to maps.

“It’s more like an eating disorder because they have to learn to use tech,” just as anorexics need to eat, says Hilarie Cash, chief clinical officer and another co-founder at reSTART, which opened nearly a decade ago. They’ve since added an adolescent program and will soon offer outpatient services because of growing demand.

The young tech worker, who grew up just down the road, didn’t have the funds to go to such a program — it’s not covered by insurance, because tech addiction is not yet an official diagnosis.

But he, too, has apps on his phone that send reports about what he’s viewing to his 12-step sponsor, a fellow tech addict named Charlie, a 30-year-old reSTART graduate.

At home, the young man also persuaded his mom to get rid of Wi-Fi to lessen the temptation. Mom struggles with her own addiction — over-eating — so she’s tried to be as supportive as she can.

It hasn’t been easy for her son, who still relapses every month or two with an extended online binge. He’s managed to keep his job. But sometimes, he wishes he could be more like his co-workers, who spend a lot of their leisure time playing video games and seem to function just fine.

“Deep down, I think there’s a longing to be one of those people,” Charlie says.

That’s true, the young man concedes. He still has those days when he’s tired, upset or extremely bored — and he tests the limits.

He tells himself he’s not as bad as other addicts. Charlie knows something’s up when his calls or texts aren’t returned for several days, or even weeks.

“Then,” the young man says, “I discover very quickly that I am actually an addict, and I do need to do this.”

Having Charlie to lean on helps. “He’s a role model,” he says.

“He has a place of his own. He has a dog. He has friends.”

That’s what he wants for himself.

——

Online:

Internet & Tech Addiction Anonymous: http://www.netaddictionanon.com

reSTART Life: https://netaddictionrecovery.com

Children and Screens: http://www.childrenandscreens.com

——

Martha Irvine, an AP national writer and visual journalists, can be reached at mirvine//twitter.com/irvineap

He’s a ‘tech addict’ who works in the tech industry published first on https://worldwideinvestforum.tumblr.com/

[mikemortgage]

He’s a ‘tech addict’ who works in the tech industry

BELLEVUE, Wash. — The young men sit in chairs in a circle in a small meeting room in suburban Seattle and introduce themselves before they speak. It is much like any other 12-step meeting — but with a twist.

“Hi, my name is,” each begins. Then something like, “and I’m an internet and tech addict.”

The eight who’ve gathered here are beset by a level of tech obsession that’s different than it is for those of us who like to say we’re addicted to our phones or an app or some new show on a streaming video service. For them, tech gets in the way of daily functioning and self-care. We’re talking flunk-your-classes, can’t-find-a-job, live-in-a-dark-hole kinds of problems, with depression, anxiety and sometimes suicidal thoughts part of the mix.

There’s Christian, a 20-year-old college student from Wyoming who has a traumatic brain injury. His mom urged him to seek help because he was “medicating” his depression with video games and marijuana.

Seth, a 28-year-old from Minnesota, used video games and any number of things to try to numb his shame after a car he was driving crashed, seriously injuring his brother.

Wes, 21, an Eagle Scout and college student from Michigan, played video games 80 hours a week, only stopping to eat every two to three days. He lost 25 pounds and failed his classes.

Across town there is another young man who attended this meeting, before his work schedule changed — and his work places him squarely at risk of temptation.

He does cloud maintenance for a suburban Seattle tech company. For a self-described tech addict, this is like working in the lion’s den, labouring for the very industry that peddles the games, videos and other online content that long has been his vice.

“I’m like an alcoholic working at a bar,” the 27-year-old laments.

——

“The drugs of old are now repackaged. We have a new foe,” Cosette Rae says of the barrage of tech. A former developer in the tech world, she heads a Seattle area rehab centre called reSTART Life, one of the few residential programs in the nation specializing in tech addiction.

Use of that word — addiction — when it comes to devices, online content and the like, is still debated in the mental health world. But many practitioners agree that tech use is increasingly intertwined with the problems of those seeking help.

An American Academy of Pediatrics review of worldwide research found that excessive use of video games alone is a serious problem for as many as 9 per cent of young people. This summer, the World Health Organization also added “gaming disorder” to its list of afflictions. A similar diagnosis is being considered in the United States.

It can be a taboo subject in an industry that frequently faces criticism for using “persuasive design,” intentionally harnessing psychological concepts to make tech all the more enticing. That’s why the 27-year-old who works at the tech company spoke on condition that his identity not be revealed. He fears that speaking out could hurt his fledgling career.

“I stay in the tech industry because I truly believe that technology can help other people,” the young man says. He wants to do good.

But as his co-workers huddle nearby, talking excitedly about their latest video game exploits, he puts on his headphones, hoping to block the frequent topic of conversation in this tech-centric part of the world.

Even the computer screen in front of him could lead him astray. But he digs in, typing determinedly on his keyboard to refocus on the task at hand.

——

The demons are not easy to wrestle for this young man, who was born in 1991, the very year the World Wide Web went public.

As a toddler, he sat on his dad’s lap as they played simple video games on a Mac Classic II computer. Together in their Seattle area home, they browsed the internet on what was then a ground-breaking new service called Prodigy. The sound of the bouncy, then high-pitched tones of the dial-up connection are etched in his memory.

By early elementary school, he got his first Super Nintendo system and fell in love with “Yoshi’s Story,” a game where the main character searched for “lucky fruit.”

As he grew, so did one of the world’s major tech hubs. Led by Microsoft, it rose from the nondescript suburban landscape and farm fields here, just a short drive from the home he still shares with his mom, who split from her husband when their only child was 11.

The boy dreamt of being part of this tech boom and, in eighth grade, wrote a note to himself. “I want to be a computer engineer,” it read.

Very bright and with a head full of facts and figures, he usually did well in school. He also took an interest in music and acting but recalls how playing games increasingly became a way to escape life — the pain he felt, for instance, when his parents divorced or when his first serious girlfriend broke his heart at age 14. That relationship still ranks as his longest.

“Hey, do you wanna go out?” friends would ask.

“No, man, I got plans. I can’t do it this weekend. Sorry,” was his typical response, if he answered at all.

“And then I’d just go play video games,” he says of his adolescent “dark days,” exacerbated by attention deficit disorder, depression and major social anxiety.

Even now, if he thinks he’s said something stupid to someone, his words are replaced with a verbal tick – “Tsst, tsst” — as he replays the conversation in his head.

“There’s always a catalyst and then it usually bubbles up these feelings of avoidance,” he says. “I go online instead of dealing with my feelings.”

He’d been seeing a therapist since his parents’ divorce. But attending college out of state allowed more freedom and less structure, so he spent even more time online. His grades plummeted, forcing him to change majors, from engineering to business.

Eventually, he graduated in 2016 and moved home. Each day, he’d go to a nearby restaurant or the library to use the Wi-Fi, claiming he was looking for a job but having no luck.

Instead, he was spending hours on Reddit, an online forum where people share news and comments, or viewing YouTube videos. Sometimes, he watched online porn.

Even now, his mom doesn’t know that he lied. “I still need to apologize for that,” he says, quietly.

——

The apologies will come later, in Step 9 of his 12-step program, which he found with the help of a therapist who specializes in tech addiction. He began attending meetings of the local group called Internet & Tech Addiction Anonymous in the fall of 2016 and landed his current job a couple months later.

For a while now, he’s been stuck on Step 4 — the personal inventory — a challenge to take a deep look at himself and the source of his problems. “It can be overwhelming,” he says.

The young men at the recent 12-step meeting understand the struggle.

“I had to be convinced that this was a ‘thing,”‘ says Walker, a 19-year-old from Washington whose parents insisted he get help after video gaming trashed his first semester of college. He and others from the meeting agreed to speak only if identified by first name, as required by the 12-step tenets.

That’s where facilities like reSTART come in. They share a group home after spending several weeks in therapy and “detoxing” at a secluded ranch. One recent early morning at the ranch outside Carnation, Washington, an 18-year-old from California named Robel was up early to feed horses, goats and a couple of farm cats — a much different routine than staying up late to play video games. He and other young men in the house also cook meals for one another and take on other chores.

Eventually, they write “life balance plans,” committing to eating well and regular sleep and exercise. They find jobs and new ways to socialize, and many eventually return to college once they show they can maintain “sobriety” in the real world. They make “bottom line” promises to give up video games or any other problem content, as well as drugs and alcohol, if those are issues. They’re also given monitored smartphones with limited function — calls, texts and emails and access to maps.

“It’s more like an eating disorder because they have to learn to use tech,” just as anorexics need to eat, says Hilarie Cash, chief clinical officer and another co-founder at reSTART, which opened nearly a decade ago. They’ve since added an adolescent program and will soon offer outpatient services because of growing demand.

The young tech worker, who grew up just down the road, didn’t have the funds to go to such a program — it’s not covered by insurance, because tech addiction is not yet an official diagnosis.

But he, too, has apps on his phone that send reports about what he’s viewing to his 12-step sponsor, a fellow tech addict named Charlie, a 30-year-old reSTART graduate.

At home, the young man also persuaded his mom to get rid of Wi-Fi to lessen the temptation. Mom struggles with her own addiction — over-eating — so she’s tried to be as supportive as she can.

It hasn’t been easy for her son, who still relapses every month or two with an extended online binge. He’s managed to keep his job. But sometimes, he wishes he could be more like his co-workers, who spend a lot of their leisure time playing video games and seem to function just fine.

“Deep down, I think there’s a longing to be one of those people,” Charlie says.

That’s true, the young man concedes. He still has those days when he’s tired, upset or extremely bored — and he tests the limits.

He tells himself he’s not as bad as other addicts. Charlie knows something’s up when his calls or texts aren’t returned for several days, or even weeks.

“Then,” the young man says, “I discover very quickly that I am actually an addict, and I do need to do this.”

Having Charlie to lean on helps. “He’s a role model,” he says.

“He has a place of his own. He has a dog. He has friends.”

That’s what he wants for himself.

——

Online:

Internet & Tech Addiction Anonymous: http://www.netaddictionanon.com

reSTART Life: https://netaddictionrecovery.com

Children and Screens: http://www.childrenandscreens.com

——

Martha Irvine, an AP national writer and visual journalists, can be reached at mirvine//twitter.com/irvineap

from Financial Post http://bit.ly/2GGrQ2O via IFTTT Blogger Mortgage Tumblr Mortgage Evernote Mortgage Wordpress Mortgage href="https://www.diigo.com/user/gelsi11">Diigo Mortgage

#IFTTT #Financial Post

[lafayetteslattes-blog]

House AU chapter two

TW after the cut

Alex was bouncy as ever when he entered the common room. “Here we are!” Alex turned to Lafayette with a large grin. Laf was about to thank him and walk away, hoping that this would be the last time the shorter man spoke to him. But, again, he was wrong. “I’ll introduce you to everyone!” Alex clapped his hands together.

“Alexander!” A girl, only slightly shorter than Alex (who is pretty short), ran up to Alex and pulled him into a large embrace. She was wearing a blue dress with sleeves that stopped at her elbows, giving Lafayette (and everyone else) a perfect view of the scars the littered her wrists. Alex’s smile shrank but it was still there. He hugged the small girl back.

“Hands to yourself!” Lafayette turned to see Dr. Jefferson, sitting in the corner of the room, eyeing Alexander. Odd, Laf thought to himself. Alex pushed the girl off of him and gripped her shoulders, staring down at her.

“Now, you know the rules, Eliza.” He rubbed her cheek and she blushed. Lafayette was both confused and intrigued. Didn’t Alex mention a boyfriend? Maybe he swung both ways? Or this Eliza character was just obsessed with him. Lafayette waved off the last one, he doesn’t understand what anyone would see in the guy. Speaking of, Alex turned to Laf, “This is Eliza, and she’s closer to sane than anyone in this building.” He leaned in and whispered, “including the doctors, if you ask me.”

Eliza blushed and swatted Alex’s arm before sticking her hand out, “Elizabeth Schuyler, and you are?” Lafayette looked down at her small hand and his brow lifted. Eliza put her hand back down to her side awkwardly and turned around to walk away.

Alex laughed, “What a jokester, this guy!” He shook his head and walked over to another girl, same height as Eliza. Lafayette instinctively (although he had no idea why) followed after him. She was staring at the piano silently, “Peggy! How are you?” She blinked. “Good to see you can still hold a decent conversation, this is my new roomie, Lafayette! You can call him large baguette, though.”

“No, you cannot.” Lafayette stated. Alex laughed again.

“Don’t worry, Laf, she hasn’t spoken since she put in this place.” Laf? When was that nickname established? Lafayette shook his head and walked to the couch, next to a rather skinny guy with freckles that covered his face. “John, bud! Have you lost weight?” Alex asked, squeezing himself in between Lafayette and John.

Does this kid ever stop? Lafayette tried to scoot away, but was already against the arm of the couch. He and Alex’s legs were brushing against each other, but the younger one didn’t seem to notice. He was too invested in starting a conversation with the John guy. His fingers were playing with John’s curls and he was blushing. Why was he blushing? Did they have history? Why was this guy so skinny?

John took Alex’s hand and turned towards him with a smile, “Hola Alex, quién es este?” John nodded to Lafayette, who was really wishing he knew Spanish.

“Oh! John, meet Lafayette. Lafayette, meet John! He was my old roomie when I came here the first time… And second. But now, he’s roomed with Mulligan so I’m stuck with you. But I’m totally not complaining.” Alex’s smile never left his face. This guy smiles way too much. Lafayette’s going to have fun figuring him out.

“Ah, hola, Lafayette.” John held out his fist. So this guy wanted a fist bump? It’s different from the usual handshake, but Lafayette still wasn’t having it. Alex nudged John and he put his hand down, “Your names foreign, where are you from?” When Laf didn’t answer, Alex took it upon himself to answer for him.

“Laffy Taffy’s from France,” He sing-songed.

“Laffy Taffy?”

“It’s this thing Lex does when he makes new friends, he gives them nicknames.” John laughs and pokes Alex’s cheek. And then Lafayette said it.

“So you’re anorexic, huh? Isn’t that, how you say, a girl thing?” Lafayette smirked at the glare John shot his way. John stood up and stared at Alex before going over to one of the chairs set in the middle of the room shaped into a circle. Lafayette looked over at Alex but the sight before him was kind of shocking.

This is the first time Lafayette had seen (given the fact the he’s only known Alex for like twenty minutes) Alex without a smile on his face. He was actually stone-faced and looked pretty ticked off. “That’s my friend, Laf, you shouldn’t say things like that to people.” And then he stood up and walked to sit next to John, Eliza soon joining them. Lafayette looked at the three with suspicion but shrugged, seeing that he was now free from an annoying little (teenage) boy.

He spotted a piano and stood up to walk over to it. It was beautiful, really. But dusty. “Hasn’t been used in years.” Lafayette jumped and turned to see a muscular but short man with a beanie on standing before him. The man jumped as well but offered a small smile. “I was pissed when I found out too, I’d rather have no piano at all than have someone like him,” He gestured to John who was pretending to have injured himself, most likely for pain meds, “banging on the keys 24/7.” The man laughed and Lafayette smiled. Who’s he?

“Bonjour, I’m Gilbert. But I go by Lafayette.” He held his hand out. This time he was the one getting denied the handshake. The man flinched away as if Lafayette was going to punch him. Paranoia.

“I’m Hercules Mulligan.” Was all he said before going to take a seat on the other side of John. Thomas went to the seat next to him and was soon joined by a few other patients, there were two seats left now. Lafayette was guessing one was for Peggy, who was still staring at the piano. Lafayette felt like her eyes followed him everywhere he went. The other must’ve been for him. One was in between Jefferson and some guy who wouldn’t stop hitting himself in the head, although both hands were covered in layers of socks. The other was in between a girl who was holding a stuffed rabbit to her chest as if her life depended on it and (you guessed it) Alexander.

“Gilbert,” Thomas called out, “Time for group.”

Lafayette was able to figure out everything about everybody in the damn room. Eliza has (obviously, if you ask him) depression. John was anorexic. Alexander was bipolar (and just plain delusional, again, Lafayette's opinion). That Hercules guy was paranoid, thinking that the government was watching their every move. And then there was this Burr guy and his little girlfriend (?), Theodosia who both think their some kind of indestructible super heroes. He could tell that Burr was more convinced than Theo. Compulsive liar, maybe?

The thing is, no one could figure out why Lafayette was there. The guy seemed pretty "normal", a total dick, yeah. But other than that, he seemed pretty sane. He (along with Alex) didn't even take any pills at the assigned time. He sat and watched whatever Alexander was watching on the TV at the small corner of the room. Alex, by the way, forgave Lafayette (even though he didn't apologize) and was buddy buddy with him all over again. Even tried holding his hand. He ended up getting yelled at, but Alex's endless smile was there to stay.

It was now lights out. Lafayette, didn't know what time it was, past midnight, probably. But he couldn't sleep because of Alex's constant mumbling about King's college and losing his scholarship. "Could you please shut up?" Lafayette asked. Alex stopped for a few moments but then turned to face Lafayette's bed.

"Hey, Laf?"

"No."

"Did you go to college?" Alex asked, he sounded like a two year old. And if Lafayette wasn't so tired (and didn't hate Alex) he would've found it adorable.

"Never finished." Alex didn't pry after that.

"Hey, Laf?"

"What?"

"Can I sleep with you? It's just that... When I was roomed with John, he'd always let me sleep with him if either of us were having trouble sleeping. And you seem to have trouble and I could always use a cuddle and..."

"Alexander?"

"Yeah, Laf?"

"I'm having trouble sleeping, because you won't shut up."

"Oh." Alex turned onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, "Sorry." Lafayette sighed and turned to face the wall, pulling his blanket closer to him. After a while he was almost asleep when Alexander spoke again. "Goodnight, Laf. Goodnight, mom. Goodnight dad." And then he was snoring.

And if Lafayette muttered a small goodnight in return, nobody needed to know.

henlo! I wrote that all in a day wow, so my goal for each chapter is at LEAST 1,000+ words. This also on my ao3 @/lafayetteslattes

#House AU #hamlaf #hamilton #woo