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#sucks enough already having to get 6k words down before i can post a chapter for my current wip </3
vulpinesaint · 1 year
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want to post on ao3. don't want to write things to post on ao3. want to post on ao3.
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meltwonu · 4 years
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s n a k e     |     e y e s     [chapter 5]
pairing; snakehybrid!woozi x female!reader
this chapter’s notes; possessive!jihoon, dom!jihoon, marking, choking, restraints, dirty talk, impregnation kink, cream pie w/ minor cumplay ! whew! 🤪🥴🤤 also this snake-hybrid au isn’t following any of the blurbs/drabble game posts that precede it!! I know I did some drabble posts with snake hoonie but this doesn’t follow the same timeline as those otherwise it wouldnt make sense 🤣 kfhkdh also i do be laughin that this gets posted after the svt anniversary video and gose where jihoon was chan and teasing him bc 🥴 anyway! this is a long ass chapter and almost 6k words so strap in for the ride yall! 💕💕💕💕 
chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - x - x - x - x - x
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“Are you mad?”
“What? No, just… I mean, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”
You watch Jihoon from across the table at brunch as he picks at his food quietly. Minghao had texted again asking if lunch was still on for next week and you had asked Jihoon as soon as the two of you sat down to eat.
“If you’re uncomfortable with Minghao and Chan coming, it’s okay. You can tell me, Jihoon.” He sits across from you with a pout on his lips. 
“It’s not that I’m uncomfortable I’m just… shy. But it’s okay. Because I… If they’re your friends then they must be nice, right? I’m just shy around new people.”
“Okay, but like, if things feel off… Just let me know?” Jihoon nods, taking a bite of his food. It falls into a comfortable silence while the two of you eat; enjoying each other’s company after last night. The memories flood your headspace in an instant. Right, you needed to talk to Jihoon about that.
“Hey, Jihoon?”
“Hmm?”
“About last night…”
“Oh. Right. Did you hate it? I can stop if you don’t like it. It doesn’t make sense if we don’t benefit from it.” A flush covers your skin almost immediately as you place your fork down on your plate.
“I didn’t hate it… But I’m just curious… If--I mean, I don’t want you to think this is just a physical thing, I guess?” This time it’s Jihoon’s turn to blush as he meets your shy stare.
“I… I mean we’re still getting to know each other, right? And I like you. You’re nice and you care about me. We can just… think of it as the physical part of getting to know each other.”
You bite the inside of your cheek, thinking about his words. You clearly like liked Jihoon too and you didn’t want to take things too far too fast. But you also knew that he was aware of the sexual tension floating around the air now and the two of you couldn’t really go back to ‘normal’ after last night.
“Okay, yeah, that makes sense. I just don’t want to… go too fast, y’know? You’ve only been here a few weeks...”
“That’s true. But also in fairness, this is the longest I’ve been away from the adoption center so it seems to be going well if you ask me.”
Damn. He was right and you hadn’t even realized it. Jihoon had already been with you for over a month and you hadn’t even noticed the time passing. You feel your heart swelling at the thought.
“Huh. You’re right. I guess we really do work well together, huh?”
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“Ah, ngh, Ji--Jihoon w--wait, my phone’s ringing!” 
Jihoon’s grip on your thighs tighten, his blonde hair peeking from between your legs. Your hands brace yourself on the table where you calmly had brunch just 3 hours ago. Jihoon had clearly still been hungry.
“You can answer it?” He immediately laps at your clit after his comment, fingertips curling inside your pussy as your eyes roll to the back of your head. “I--I ca--can’t!” He smiles against you before applying pressure to the nub with his tongue. “Uh-kay them, dom’t?” Jihoon’s voice is muffled against your skin, a whimper escaping your lips at Jihoon’s unhelpfulness.
“Ji--Jihoon you’re so m-mean!” You whine.
You watch Minghao’s name disappear from your phone screen next to you on the table, a moan on your lips when Jihoon’s fingers curve up into your g-spot. “Oh, f-fuck, right t-there!” You tangle one of your hands in his hair, tugging him closer as you grind yourself against his tongue and fingers.
Minghao [3:14PM]: I tried calling but you’re probably busy?
Minghao [3:14PM]: Chan and I are free on Wednesday, lmk if it works for you.
You can barely catch the words on your phone screen before Jihoon sucks your clit into his mouth.
“Ugh, fuck, Jihoon I’m--” Your eyes snap shut almost immediately; thighs clamping shut around Jihoon’s head as you cum hard. He scissors his fingers inside of you, tongue still lapping at your clit until you start to come down from your high.
Your limbs feel boneless once your orgasm fades off, shaky legs unclamping as Jihoon slides his fingers from your pussy straight to his mouth. Letting your legs down as you sit up to catch your breath, you watch him still on his knees in front of you as he cleans your wetness from his fingertips.
“God, Ji. That was Minghao!” Jihoon pops his fingers from his mouth, getting up from his kneeling position.
“What did he want?”
“They’ll be over Wednesday so we have some work to do!”
“Okay but can we cuddle first? We can figure out the rest later.”
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Over the next couple of days leading up, you and Jihoon take the time to clean up the apartment and buy some ingredients for lunch. And since Chan was a bunny hybrid, he was strictly vegetarian which meant you and Jihoon had tried to cook a few recipes to decide what was best.
“Are they gonna come soon?” Jihoon munches on a stray piece of carrot, watching as you finish up in the kitchen. “Mmhmm, but knowing Minghao they might be a little late.”
You and Minghao had agreed on 12:00PM and it was currently 12:04PM; If you were lucky he’d be here by 12:45PM at the earliest. Jihoon helps you tidy up the kitchen once you’re finished, flopping onto the sofa once he’s done. And he won’t admit it but he’s nervous; eyes fixated on the ceiling as he twiddles his thumbs and sighs.
“You okay, Ji?”
“Mm? Yeah… Haven’t really met another hybrid since Mingyu and Seokmin so s’kinda weird. I’m okay though.” You start to make your way to the sofa but the doorbell rings just as you reach Jihoon. You shoot him an encouraging smile, running your fingers through his hair really quick before turning and making your way to the door.
When you swing it open, you're met with Minghao’s cheery face and Chan inquisitive one. In actuality, you’d only ever seen Chan in photos and you can’t help but immediately gush at how cute he is; completely ignoring Minghao’s presence once you take note of Chan’s cute bunny ears atop his head.
“Oh my god, you are just… So cute!”
You refrain from touching the cute caramel coloured bunny ears, noticing they match the colour of his hair.
“Come in! Jihoon’s in the living room!” Chan flashes you a sweet smile as Minghao raises an eyebrow at you. “You didn’t even say ‘hi’ to me. Rude!” You laugh at Minghao’s comment, giving them enough space to enter your apartment.
“Sorry, I’ve just never met Chan before. He’s cuter in person so I was distracted!”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, just tell me you’re tired of me, you don’t have to lie!”
“‘Hao! You know you’re my best friend but Chan’s… cuter. I’m sorry.” Minghao feigns hurt, wiping invisible tears as they stand in your hallway.
Now that you think of it, you weren’t sure how Chan and Jihoon were going to get along, if at all. It’d slipped your mind but technically Jihoon was a predator animal hybrid and Chan was a prey animal hybrid. Your mind blanks at the sudden epiphany as you gulp.
“Um, shall we move to the living room?” The two nod, waiting for you to lead the way. Taking a deep breath, you lead them to the living room; eyes meeting Jihoon’s as he sits up on the sofa.
“Jihoon, I want you to meet my friend Minghao and his hybrid, Chan!” You try to put on a cheery smile but you can already sense that Jihoon’s kind of on edge.
When you’d spoken to Seungcheol about him back at the adoption home, he had said that Jihoon typically got along well with every hybrid at the home so far and that the snake hybrid hadn’t gotten into any fights or threatened any of the other hybrids there. You really had no reason to be that concerned, and plus, Jihoon had already told you he was just shy more often than not.
“Hi, I’m Jihoon. Um… I’m a snake hybrid.” You can see the flush on his face, watching as he licks his lips. It was a nervous habit that you noticed he had. And for a second you worry about if Chan’s also going to be nervous about the snake hybrid but he shoots the shorter male a beaming smile.
“Hi! I’m Chan! I’m a bunny hybrid and I like to sing! And I like to dance, too!” Chan moves forward to shake Jihoon’s hand, backing off slightly when he sees the snake hybrid flinch. “Oh, sorry. Do you not like handshakes?”
“Huh? Oh, no I--I was just surprised that’s all.” Jihoon reaches a hand out instead, a tiny smile on his lips when Chan shakes it. “Oh, whoa, your hands are cold!” Minghao scolds him slightly, giving him a warning look as Chan sheepishly scratches his head. “Sorry, hyung always gets mad at me because sometimes I talk first and don’t think.” Jihoon laughs at this and you feel your heart soaring out of your chest. Thank god!
“It’s okay, I know someone else who’s just like that and he’s a big puppy hybrid named Mingyu.”
You and Minghao fondly watch the two interact, glad that they’d gotten along well despite their differences.
“Okay guys, shall we have lunch?”
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Over the course of lunch, Jihoon and Chan talk animatedly about music as you and Minghao delve into your own conversations about work, letting the two hybrids bond. Jihoon calls your name after a while, grabbing your attention.
“Chan and I are done with lunch and I was wondering if it was okay to bring my keyboard out? We were gonna do some music stuff.” Chan looks at you with pleading eyes, lips jutting out in hopes of swaying you.
“Yeah, of course! You didn’t need to ask permission for that.” They smile at you in return, Jihoon getting up to retrieve his keyboard from his work room. “I’ll be right back.”
The three of you watch Jihoon leave the dining area, watching as he disappears into the hallway.
“Jihoon is really nice, Minghao-hyung!” The smile on Chan’s face is sincere, eyes curving into crescents.
“You’re more than welcome to come over anytime you want, Chan! Ji could use the company other than myself sometimes, I think.” You laugh at your own comment, leaning over to pat his head. He leans into your touch, sighing dreamily when you start to itch behind his ears.
“That feels really nice…” You internally scream, face red as a tomato when Chan starts scenting your hand. He rubs his face against your palm, resting his cheek against it. Uh oh, Jihoon’s not gonna like that.
Sure enough, Jihoon round the corner, eyes fixated on the way Chan’s head is on your palm.
“Um…” Minghao’s eyes travel from Chan to Jihoon as he bites his nail; knowing exactly what the snake hybrid is thinking without even saying anything. “Hey, Chan?”
“Mmh?” Minghao clears his voice in a warning manner, Chan’s eyes fluttering open.
“I think Jihoon would like to go do music stuff in the living room now.”
“Oh… okay!”
In an instant, Chan gets up like nothing happened and walks up to Jihoon. “Okay! Let’s get it!” Jihoon on the other hand quietly nods, gesturing to the bunny hybrid to follow him to where he likes to set up by the window. You shoot Minghao a look as you share a sigh. “Shall we clean up?” He nods at you, getting up from his seat as he starts to collect the utensils. And once the two are properly distracted, the two of you move into the kitchen where you start on the dishes.
“I’m really sorry about Chan. He’s normally really up on skinship, I just, I didn’t think--”
“Shh, it’s okay! I don’t think… Jihoon’s mad. Just might be weird to see me around other hybrids since he’s used to it just being me and him.”
The two of you talk in whispers, not wanting the two to hear your conversation about them.
“Trust me, Jihoon is really about skinship too. I know he doesn’t seem like it, but he’s just as bad. Don’t be sorry about Chan.”
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Once the two of you finish up cleaning, you make your way to the living room as well. The two hybrids sit in the sun by the window; Jihoon’s music notes out while Chan tries to sing along to one of his melodies.
You decide to sit closer, wanting to be a part of their music session as Minghao grabs a film camera from his bag. “Might as well, Chan likes keeping the photos in his scrapbook.”
“Oh yeah! I put pictures of me and all my friends in it. All the pictures are from hyung, obviously. Now I can add you and Jihoon-hyung to it!”
The four of you sit on the floor in somewhat of a circle, Minghao and Chan next to you as Jihoon sits in front of you. Chan glances at you once before he shifts closer to you.
“Can you pet me again?”
You blush for a moment, but he inches closer again and you feel sort of bad. “He never pets me when he’s “working”...” Chan draws air quotes around the word, a pout on his lips as he looks at Minghao.
“How can I pet you if I’m taking photos? Do I look like I have more than two hands?”
Sighing, you raise your palm, placing it on one of Chan’s fluffy ears as he leans into your touch. You’d have to deal with the repercussions with Jihoon later; you’d just hope he understood.
Chan decides to lay down on the floor, using your thigh as a pillow as he listens to Jihoon play the piano. The snake hybrid plays a familiar song as Chan sings along, voice stable even when he’s laying down. You check Jihoon’s face for any signs he’s mad but he seems to be okay for the most part, albeit a little quieter than usual. He still makes an effort to speak to Chan and engage in conversation, praising his singing voice as Chan blushes.
You play with the soft fur of Chan’s bunny ears, admiring them as you coo.
“Your ears are just so soft! And so cute!” He nuzzles into your leg, scenting you again as Jihoon seems to flinch. “Thanks~ It feels nice when people pet them!”
He stays like that for a while longer, only getting up when he starts to feel sleepy. “Hyung, m’sleepy now…” Minghao sets his camera down, running a hand through his own hair. “Did you want to head back then? We can just come over another day.” Chan nods, trying to rub the sleep out of his eyes. “I’d like that. Jihoon-hyung is cool and I wanna come see him again!”
Jihoon blushes at the comment, accidentally pressing down the wrong key as he sputters. “Y-yeah, I had f-fun too…”
The four of you get up from the floor, stretching and gathering your belongings. “I’ll show you guys to the door?” Minghao and Chan nod, and to your surprise, Jihoon follows behind as you begin to walk to the doorway. “It was really nice having you guys over! And Chan, you’re always welcome here too. Maybe we can call up ‘Cheol and have him bring Mingyu along as well!” Chan talks animatedly about how much he’d like that, already asking when they could set up a date.
“Alright, slow down, bud. We gotta figure out when ‘Cheol’s got time and we still got work, y’know?”
“Yes, hyung…”
You side hug Minghao, only for Chan to launch himself at you right after. He nuzzles into your neck as he squeezes you tight. “Thank you for having us over today!”
When he lets go of you, he immediately looks to Jihoon, shooting him a smile and waving before running out the door.
“I’m really really sorry about him.”
“It’s okay, get going before he bounces off somewhere. I’ll talk to you later, ‘Hao.”
You shut the door once they leave, breathing a sigh of relief when you turn around.
Jihoon doesn’t visibly look upset, but you can see a glint in his eyes that tells you he’s thinking about it.
“Hey, Ji--”
“Mm, I’m gonna work on some music back in my work room. I got some ideas and I wanna hash them out before I lose the inspiration.” You nod, watching him as he grabs his keyboard from the living room and starts down the hallway.
“I dunno when I’ll be done but if you start on dinner, just call me.”
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You leave Jihoon to his work, tidying up around the house before you plop down onto the sofa to watch some TV. You’d figured that Jihoon probably just needed some time to himself to cool off, just in case he really was mad. But at the same time, you were really proud of the snake hybrid for being so civil and kind to Chan despite Chan’s need for skinship.
Not even realizing you fell asleep at some point, you sit up on the sofa groggily. The sky is already dark outside of the windows so you’d fallen asleep for quite a white, shutting off the TV as you stretch. Turning towards the hallway, you wonder what Jihoon is even up to; if he’s even still working on his music.
Getting up from the sofa, you stretch, already walking down the hallway to Jihoon’s workroom. You don’t hear any music and you don’t hear his voice at all but you knock, calling Jihoon’s name softly.
He opens the door gently after a minute or so, sleepy eyes meeting yours. “Oh, did you end up taking a nap too?” You can hear the sleep laced in his voice, reaching up to thread your hand into his blonde locks.
“Yeah, I fell asleep on the sofa. Guess we were more tired than expected, huh? I’m gonna start on dinner, if you wanna come keep me company or something.” He nods, letting you know he’ll be out in a few minutes.
You walk to the kitchen, already grabbing the necessary items to start on dinner. Jihoon joins you a few minutes later, walking up behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist as he rests his chin on your shoulder.
“You smell like him, y’kno?” Jihoon’s voice is soft but gravelly next to your ear. There’s a certain edge to his voice that has you shuddering against his form. “Do you want to know something?”
“H-Huh?”
“They say that some snakes can smell the fear in their prey. Do you believe it?”
“I--I don’t know?” There’s a soft but warning chuckle by your ear, Jihoon’s arms tightening around your body as he presses harder into you. “I don’t know if I believe it either. But wouldn’t it be an advantage? To know your prey is… submissive.” You can’t even tell what your hands are doing anymore when Jihoon takes the moment to lick the shell of your ear. His lips travel down, nipping the skin of your neck as you let out a shaky breath. You can feel the wetness pooling between your thighs as he continues his path, digging his teeth into the junction of your neck before he sucks the skin into his mouth to soothe it. His hands begin traveling up your torso, cupping your breasts in his palms before harshly squeezing.
“Ji--Jihoon the--the dinner…”
“I think I want to eat something else right now. What do you say?”
You moan in response, grinding back against his hardening cock. “O--okay…”
“Meet me in the bedroom in 5 minutes.”
You release the breath you didn’t realize you were holding when Jihoon steps back and starts walking towards the bedroom. Okay, maybe he was a tiny bit mad, if not territorial. You wash your hands, forgetting about dinner as you stand in the kitchen thinking about how potentially dominating Jihoon could be. The thoughts alone are enough to have you moaning out loud as you rub your thighs together. You don’t really know why Jihoon has you waiting but you obey his word, giving him a few minutes before heading down the hallway to your bedroom.
Not really knowing what to expect, you open the door to find Jihoon by the foot of the bed, 3 of your panties already torn and on top of the bedsheets. “Sorry, I didn’t really know what to use for restraints so I had to make some. Hope you don’t mind.” You feel a tingly sensation running all over your body; all the way down to the tips of your fingers.
“Um--Uh, no..”
“Good. I figured we could do a little learning exercise. What do you think?”
“I--Sure?” There’s no denying how wet you are just from the energy Jihoon was exuding. “I--I don’t know what to do…”
“I want you to strip and get on the bed for me. And lay back against the pillows.”
You nod, stripping your clothes off slow and quietly before getting on the bed. Jihoon follows suit, stripping himself bare before he joins you, spreading your legs and slotting himself in between. He scoffs slightly when he notices your wet folds. “You know, snakes aren’t typically known for being territorial. But when they feel threatened, they’re more likely to attack.”
Jihoon leans in, his chest meeting yours as he ghosts his lips above your own. “Chan’s a sweet kid. Such a shame he’s so blind with his actions.” You can’t help but gulp and hold your breath, shaky eyes watching Jihoon as he leans towards your neck instead. “Just to make sure we’re on the same page as he is, I guess I should let him know who really belongs to who, hmm?” He chuckles against your skin, leaving love bites blooming in his path. “Ngh, Jihoon…”
Placing your hands on his forearms, he stops and pulls away. “Oh, right. Let’s try these.” He pulls away to grab the torn material on the bed next to you. “I’m sure Seungcheol-hyung��s already told you specifically I’m a ball python hybrid right? And you must know that constrictor types like to, well, constrict their prey.” There’s a glint in his eye and a smirk on his lips when he drags the torn fabric up your naked torso. It tickles your skin, a whimper escaping your lips when the soft material ghosts across your nipples.
“But before we get started, I need to know a safe word from you.”
“Um, uh… l--lightning?”
“Interesting choice, but okay. Arms up and towards the headboard.”
He takes his time tying your wrists above you, admiring his work once he deems it’s tight enough and you’re comfortable. “In theory, I’d love for you to touch me but this is a learning experience on predators and prey. You understand, don’t you?”
“Y-yes…”
Jihoon smiles at you, hands gripping your thighs hard. “You smell so good. You’re so fuckin’ wet I can smell just how bad you want me to slide my cock right into that pussy. But you know what else? I can still smell that bunny hybrid on your skin.” You moan at his rough touch, squirming when he presses the shaft of his cock against your wet folds. “I can stand it when you come home smelling like other people because of work, but not this.”
He leans into you again, lips ghosting against your sternum. “I’m just gonna have to get rid of it myself then, huh?” Licking his lips, his tongue peeks from between them, already lapping at your skin. His tongue drags across your torso, flicking at a nipple before he wraps his mouth around it. You arch your back, leaning into his touch. He repeats this on the other side, laughing softly against your skin when he feels you rolling your hips against his. “Already so desperate for my cock? C’mon now, baby.”
The way Jihoon calls you ‘baby’ has your entire body flaring up, the breath getting knocked out of you almost immediately. “I have to mark you up all nice and pretty for your friends to see.”
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What you learn in the next 15 minutes is that Jihoon can be mean.
He takes the time to nip at your skin, biting and sucking at it to leave blooming red marks all over your torso and neck. Jihoon takes it even further by skimming across your lower abdomen, sucking love bites onto your hips and even on your thighs. You sob, tugging at the restraints above you as you beg him to do something more.
“I am doing something. I’m marking you.”
“B--But I want… mo--more…”
“Oh? Do predators usually pamper their prey before consuming or attacking them?”
The goosebumps rise on your skin at his comment as you quickly shut your mouth. “That’s what I thought.”
He slots himself back between your legs, wrapping them around his waist.
Jihoon runs his fingers through your folds, watching you squirm as he collects the wetness on his fingertips before inserting two fingers into your pussy. “Fuck, you’re so wet, my fingers slid right in.” You sob, eyes wet with unshed tears. The urge to cum is already so strong and Jihoon had barely started. He thrusts his fingers hard and fast, curving them inside of you to hit your g-spot. You can’t help but tighten around his digits, crying out when he adds a third.
You feel impossibly full when he fingers you and you can barely wait until it’s his cock instead. He was definitely much bigger than his fingers and you were slightly worried he was almost too big for you to handle. But he works you open, thumb on your clit while he thrusts his fingers in knuckle deep.
There’s no word of warning before you’re cumming all over his fingers, wrecked sobs the only thing you can manage while he continues to rub at your clit.
“Ji--Jihoon, fuck, I--”
“Mmh, your body is so fucking warm. Your pussy is so wet and hot around my fingers. I need to fuck you now.”
Whimpering, you watch through teary eyes as he brings his fingers to his cock, spreading the precum and your wetness all over the head and shaft of it before positioning himself at your entrance. Your body is still sensitive and your orgasm is still ebbing away when Jihoon starts to push in. 
There’s a slight sting when he does; he was definitely much bigger and wider than his fingers. And without even saying anything, Jihoon caresses your skin, quietly praising you for being so good for him.
“Jihoon, ngh, fu--fuck, your cock feels so good and so big…”
He smiles at the praise, watching as his cock disappears into your pussy. There’s an incoherent babble on your lips when he finally bottoms out; the head of his cock snug against your cervix. “Fuc--Fuck! Please fuck me, please fuck me, please fuck me!”
Jihoon can also be nice.
He starts a slow pace, letting you get used to his size. “Your pussy is so tight and warm around my cock. Fuck, I could stay here forever.” His grip on your thighs tighten, grinding himself into you between thrusts. You can feel yourself start to drool a little at the feeling. If you felt full with his fingers inside of you, this was a completely different high all together. “Yes, yes, yes, fuck! Your cock is so good, I--I can’t…!”
“Yeah? Gonna let me fuck this pussy whenever I want?”
“Yes, god…!”
The sound of your moans and skin slapping are all that can be heard in the bedroom. Jihoon starts a quicker pace, leaning down until he’s nosing at your neck again. He licks at your skin, sucking on the love bites he’d already left and leaving new ones right next to them. You can feel his nails digging into the skin of your thighs, a shaky moan leaving you when you feel him raking them down your skin.
In all honesty, Jihoon never really struck you as someone that’d be into marking. But by now, you realize that it just takes a certain situation for him to really want to.
“Fuck, baby, I hope you’re c-close. I wanna cum in this tight ‘lil pussy.”
“Ngh, pl--please cum in--inside of me… I want your cum…”
He laughs against your skin, pulling away immediately after. “Oh? You want me to cum in your hot ‘lil cunt? Get you nice and full with it? Fuck… fuck! You want me to breed you, don’t you? I’ll fuck my cum into your hot ‘lil pussy and get you nice and pregnant with my babies. Bet you’d love, wouldn’t you? I’ll fill you up with my cum everytime we fuck. Everyone will know you belong to me when they smell you, when they can smell my cum trickling down your thighs. And then I’ll fuck my cum back into you and keep it inside of you ‘til you can’t take anymore of it.”
You could almost die at Jihoon’s words, clenching around his cock impossibly hard. “Yes, g-god, yes please! I want it! I want y-your cum inside of me, please!” You tug on the restraints again, just wanting to touch Jihoon as well. One of his delicate hands travels up your torso, wrapping itself around the column of your neck before pressing down on the sides slightly.
“You’re so filthy. You want me to breed you so bad, don’t you? I can feel you getting so tight around my cock.”
The lightheadedness makes you feel fuzzy, soft moans spilling from you as your eyes flutter shut.
“I want you to cum on my cock, get it nice and wet for me before I cum inside your pussy, baby.”
Jihoon grinds against you, letting the head of his cock push up against your cervix. The feeling is almost too much combined with his hand around your throat and he can see the look on your face that you’re about to cum, thrusting into you hard and fast as you sob; his hand around your throat loosening when he feels your body go rigid.
Your breath stutters and you momentarily black out when you cum, body seizing up at the intensity of your orgasm. Jihoon thumbs your clit as you cry. He continues to thrust into you, groaning at the feeling of your walls throbbing around his cock. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum!”
He grinds against you, muttering incoherent curses under his breath the entire time.
Your head feels fuzzy but you can feel his warm cum inside of you and you can’t tell if it's a hybrid thing or just a Jihoon thing but there is a lot of it. He stays still while the two of you catch your breaths, his cum already trickling down the slides of his cock that’s still sheathed inside of you.
“J-Jihoon my… my arms p-please…” He nods tiredly after a moment, undoing the restraints and checking your wrists for any marks. The skin is red and irritated where you were tugging against them but you seem fine otherwise.
“The redness should go down in a bit.”
He kisses your wrists gently, massaging your tired arms as he brings them to your sides. And as much as he doesn’t want to, he pulls out, watching as globs of cum pour out of your hole.
“Damn, what a waste.” You tiredly laugh at him, bringing a hand up to wipe at your tear-streaked face. “Push my cum out, baby.” There’s a slight blush on your cheeks at his request, but you oblige, the warm substance dripping down onto the sheets underneath you. Jihoon watches it as it drips down, bringing a hand towards it as he scoops it up on his fingertips and presses it back into your pussy.
“Ugh, Jiho--oon~ I c-can’t anymore…”
“Sorry, must be a… hybrid thing maybe.”
“Is the amount of cum also a hybrid thing or?”
Jihoon laughs, sliding off the bed to get a clean cloth. “Dunno. Think that’s just me. I haven’t… been with anyone for a long time so… I mean, I dunno to be honest.” 
 “Oh…”
“Yeah, I dunno! Anyway, should we get cleaned up? I think the bedsheets need to… um, go.”
This time you’re so tired you can’t even begin to sit up in bed. “Ji… do you think you can carry me? I don’t think I can feel my legs.” He nods. “Oh, let me run the bath first so it can warm up.” 
You let him, watching as he disappears into the bathroom. To the best of your ability, you sit up, another gush of cum spilling out of you when you do. 
“Ugh, Ji, if you’re gonna cum this much all the time what are we gonna do about the sheets?”
He licks his lips when he walks back into the bed to come get you, scooping you up into his arms as he brings you to the bathroom with a smirk on his face. 
“I mean, we can fuck, get the sheets dirty and then fuck in the laundry room? Or fuck in the bath like I fully intend to do right now.” 
“Oh my god.” 
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tansypoisoning · 4 years
Text
(Un)Conditional - Part 2
I Came Out to Have a Good Time and I’m Honestly Feeling So Attacked Right Now
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You didn’t remember how or why you found yourself in Ransom’s bed in the first place, but now, poor, pregnant and desperate, you had your reasons for putting up with him, and they weren’t noble. His reasons for staying with you weren’t noble either.
Hey, long time no see... This took me longer than it should because I wasn’t sure about the dialogue. Still not sure about it. Some of you might have missed the polls I posted so you could help me decide the future of this series, so here they go: Whether or not I should redeem Ransom and What gender the baby (or babies, damn) should be. Democracy is important :)
Anyway: Reader meets the Thrombeys...
Story warnings:  Smut, abusive relationships, mentions of past sexual assault, talk of abortion, daddy kink, drinking, mention of drug use (Will add more as the story goes on)
Chapter 1 - Truce
Chapter 3 
Fandoms: Knives Out
Ships: Ransom Drysdale x Reader
Word Count: 6k
Chapter warnings: The reader and Ransom joke about incest and Ransom jokes about selling the baby to pay his grandfather back for all the money he lend him; people drink wine; there’s mention of drugs and people doing them; The Thrombeys are being particularly shitty.
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You were off to the clinic to get an urine exam the next day. Ransom had encouraged you to get a more reliable test to make sure you were pregnant, but he wouldn’t accompany you. He was busy, he said, but he didn’t say with what. Probably begging his granddaddy for more money or chasing after another pair of legs.
The clinic would call you in a couple of days to let you know the results. The wait was killing you. The longer you waited, the harder it would be for you to get an abortion. At some point the pill would stop being an option, and you would have to go under the… knife? Scalpel? Coat hanger? Whatever the procedure entailed, it was bound to be more stressful than just taking some meds.
What was most concerning, though, was the possibility of you becoming attached to the fetus. Your misgivings originated from a fear that you might be doing something you shouldn’t, but you had no particular regard for the thing growing inside you. You might as well be carrying a rock – it certainly tired you like one. Some day that could change, though, and the moment it did you knew it would be game over.
The first thing you did when you got home was take off your coat, kick off your shoes and fall face-first on the couch. That was also the only thing you did. According to the sources you checked, fatigue was an early pregnancy symptom, but you weren’t sure it was meant to be this bad. Good thing you weren’t behind on your freelance work; you didn’t think you could handle doing anything that evening. You were hungry, but didn’t have the energy to even go to the kitchen. Your cellphone started ringing at some point, but you had dropped your bag by the entrance. Maybe something else happened too; you didn’t know, you fell asleep soon after.
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You were roused from your nap by a cacophony of car honks right outside your window.
You jumped from the couch and stumbled to see what the commotion was about. You expected to find a car crash in front of your building, but all that was there was a familiar vehicle.
You stepped into your slippers and left your apartment. Ransom was still abusing the horn of his BMW when you came out onto the lawn.
“What are you doing?” You cried out, jogging to his car.
He put his head out through the window. “You don’t pick up your phone anymore?” He complained.
“I was sleeping.” The reason why you didn’t answer didn’t matter. This was a distraction. “Why are you here?”
“I came to pick you up, what else?” He seemed to notice you confusion and explained himself “I’m going to introduce you to my family. They’re having a dinner party tonight at my grandfather’s house. If I show up there with a kid before they even know the mother, my mother’s gonna kill me.”
That gave you pause. Introduce you to his family? That had never been in the cards before. Ransom had always been against anything that could hint to intimacy that went beyond sex, because intimacy entailed responsibility, and he was allergic to that. Your relationship was more of an arrangement, one in which he was the one with the most to gain.
Perhaps this would be your chance to really get something for yourself, something other than the occasional orgasm. Although Ransom’s charms and your proclivities were the biggest reason behind the start of your odd relationship, you’d be lying if you said his grandfather’s accomplishments didn’t affect your interest in him. Having been an avid reader of Harlan’s books back in high school (when you still had time and motivation to read) and now working as an assistant editor in the mystery fiction imprint of a large publishing company, you had hoped that maybe being involved with Ransom would give you the chance to meet him.
Even when it became clear Ransom didn’t like you like that, you still stuck around. He was inflexible when it came to your relationship’s dynamics, but you still had a sliver of hope that one day you’d get to meet his family. In the end you were right, and all you had to do to get your wish was let your idol’s grandson raw you after a couple of beers.
“I’m not even sure if I’m pregnant yet.”
“After five tests? Come on.”
“Well, I don’t know if I’m gonna keep it.”
“If you don’t, you don’t. Just let me introduce you before you decide. It’ll be awkward otherwise.”
You couldn’t argue with his logic. Ransom’s family wasn’t likely to think well of you if he introduced you as “the chick I knocked up by accident”. Your family wouldn’t be happy about it either, and yet you had to find a way to convince him to meet them at some point. You knew they weren’t going to like him, but it was better than trying to pretend it was a case of Immaculate Conception. They wouldn't fall for it anyway.
“Go get ready so we can go.” He said.
You nodded and ran back inside. He looked like he was in a rush, so all you felt comfortable doing was retouching your make up and putting on a different pair of pants. When you came back down, Ransom was pouting at his wheel.
“About time,” he said “I thought you weren’t coming.”
“I took like five minutes.”
“Eight.” He tapped the watch in his wrist.
You decided humoring him wasn’t worth it, so you got into the passenger seat without a word. Ransom took off, his tires squealing as he did a u-turn on your sidewalk. He always drove like a madman, most of all when he was in a hurry.
“How long ‘til we get there?” You asked.
“I can make it in half an hour.”
“I mean safely.”
“In that case, thirty minutes.”
Shame on you, forgetting Ransom was convinced he was immortal.
“Is there anything I have to know about your family before I get there?” You asked, trying to take your mind off the traffic lights flashing by at an alarming speed.
“I could never do them justice,” he snickered.
“At least give me something to work with.”
“You are going to have talk to my parents at least,” he mused “Just nod and agree with whatever my father says. You gotta be smarter with my mother, but avoid challenging her. Joni and Meg are annoying, Walt’s creepy, and there’s no point in talking to Donna and Jacob; they’re gonna hate you no matter what.”
“And Harlan?”
The question put a grimace on his face.
“Be honest. He’s gonna like you.” There was a minute pause before he added “We just celebrated his eighty-fifth birthday, so if you can bring up how good he looks for his age without being obnoxious, he’s gonna love it.”
“Eighty-five? When was that?” You liked Harlan’s work, but you didn’t like it enough to bother learning his birth year. You expected him to be younger, what with all the books he was still pumping out on a yearly basis.
“Last week.”
“Your family is big on get-togethers, then?”
He grimaced. “Unfortunately.”
“Familiarity breeds contempt,” you offered. You weren’t sure you’d get along with your parents as well as you did if they didn’t live in another state.
“Sucking does too.”
“But I thought you liked people who suck?”
That was a twelve year old boy joke, but it got you a chuckle.
“Already know what I’ll be trying today: Hey, Joni, blow me.”
“That’s your aunt right?” You asked and received a nod in response “I can’t wait to see you asking her for a blow job.” You didn’t really think he would go that far, so you weren’t worried you were goading him on. If he did it anyway, it would be because he decided the amusement he would get from pissing his aunt off would be worth whatever she could do to get back at him.
“Fuck, I’d accept one from my grandfather at this point.” You two had had sex just yesterday, but that was fine, you supposed.
“I think I’m going to regret this, but since we’re already in too deep and none of us knows when to stop, where are your parents in the Joni-Harlan blowjob scale?” This question might’ve offended anyone else, but Ransom was made of sterner, more horrible stuff.
He replied without missing a beat. “Oh, my dad wins easy. I don’t fancy getting bit.”
The throwaway line about his mother killing him if he just announced your pregnancy out of the blue came to mind. You wondered if she was as terrible as he made her out to be. You wondered if any of his relatives were as horrible as he made teem out to be.
“Hard to think you’d be scared of anyone in your family with all the money they lend you and you never pay back.”
He snorted. “I’m not scared of any of them. Wouldn’t be going if I were. I already owe Harlan more ‘one-pounds of flesh’ than I weigh.”
“Good thing he doesn’t charge interest.”
“Who says he doesn’t?” His eyes flicked to you for a moment, comically wide “What do you think I want the baby for?”
“You- you want the baby?” You knew he meant to jest about selling your child, and perhaps the bit about wanting it was said in the spirit of the joke, but you couldn’t help but hope it was a Freudian slip. Why did you hope that?
His Adam’s Apple bobbed as he considered your question for a few seconds. “I said I would help you with it.”
“No, you said that at first, but now you said you want it. I didn’t even ask for help, I just thought I should tell you. Why did you offer to help in the first place?”
He shrugged. Something about the gesture felt off, less cocksure than his usual self. “Because it felt right.”
“But do you want to do it? Do you even know what raising a child means?”
“Do you?”
No, you didn’t. You might have even less knowledge of the subject than Ransom, weird as that seemed. You hadn’t said you wanted to have the baby, though. You weren’t sure what you wanted.
“Do you want me to drop you off at a clinic? Because we can end this now.” Something about the way he’d said it made it seem as if he was talking about more than just the pregnancy.
“That’s not what I meant.” You whispered.
Edifices were replaced by trees as Ransom drove on. It was easy to focus on the changing view, now that he wasn’t talking to you anymore. You had broken one of his unspoken rules: never get emotional around him. You knew he wasn’t in it for something as trivial as feelings, but now with the pregnancy thing you thought… Well, you weren’t sure what you thought.
The rest of the trip went by in silence, seeming to take forever in spite of the scenery flying by. By the time you arrived at your destination you were disheartened – lucky you that the house Ransom parked in front of was the stuff murder mystery fiction dreams were made of.
Harlan’s mansion had been plucked from one of his books, it had to have been. With its red bricks and the Gothic Revival style, it looked like it’d been taken straight out of “Around the Corner and Down the Lane”. It was a magnificent, giant, mysterious house you could easily imagine multiple murders happening inside.
It was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen.
Ransom left the car, slamming the door shut on his way out. You had to hurry after him to get to the porch as he was knocking on the door.
You didn’t have to wait long to hear sounds coming from the other side. There were footsteps against a wooden floor and the shuffling of keys, and then time seemed to slow down. When you woke up that morning, you’d never have thought you would end up meeting Ransom’s family by the end of the day. Were they anything like him? What would they think of you? And what would they think about the thing? You weren’t going to talk about it today, but still…
The door opened, revealing a slim woman with an old fashioned bob-cut. She looked confused when she saw Ransom, and even more when she spotted you. She opened her mouth, but didn’t get the chance to say anything.
“Hey, Frannie,” Ransom greeted. If you didn’t know him better, you’d assume he was being friendly. “Take this for me, would you?”
He removed his coat with the speed you’d come to expect from him when it came to taking off his clothes and shoved the mass of fabric into her arms. He walked inside, brushing past her, ignoring the outraged look on her face. You followed after, and her expression was no kinder towards you. It wasn’t the first time someone got mad at you for something Ransom did, but what were you to do? It wasn’t as if you could control him.
As Ransom walked through an arch on the left and the woman scurried through a door to the right, you stood on the spot right in front of the entrance. The gargoyles sculpted in the wood of the stair railing paralyzed you, the lights from the ornate chandelier blinded you, and the memories of books read long ago, hiding under the blankets with a flashlight when you were supposed to be sleeping came rushing back to you. This was much more than you had been expecting.
The inside of the house was dark and sinister like the outside, but there was a sense of warmth you hadn’t anticipated. The soft lights, the lavish rugs, and the numerous trinkets scattered about gave it a lived in feeling. The decoration somehow split the difference between “home” and “haunted house” right down the middle.
Why was it that Ransom didn’t like visiting his grandfather again?
“What are you standing around for?”
Speak of the devil…
Your forced your feet to move and followed him deeper into the house. Something inside you screamed at you to just ditch Ransom and this stupid dinner party to explore by yourself, because you got the feeling he would end up dragging you to a place that looked much more boring. You needn’t have worried – the living room was adorned in much the same way as the hall, cluttered and discordant and fascinating. Every piece of decor seemed to selected based on its own merits rather than any common theme or style, but it somehow all worked together.
You had started making your way to a windowsill, from where a model of a carousel with fish instead of horses called to you, when a voice stopped you in your tracks – a voice you had never heard before.
“Who’s that?”
You whirled around to see a man standing just a few feet away from Ransom. The age was about right, and with the two standing so close together, it was hard to deny the similarities between them.
“That’s my date,” Ransom said with a shrug.
“Date? You brought a date?”
“Nice, Richard. We don’t want to make her feel too welcome.”
At that, the older man looked back at you with a grin that would be charming if not for the utter shock reflected in his eyes.
“Hey, there,” he greeted, extending a hand “Richard Drysdale, father of this,” he glanced behind himself to look at Ransom, who was busy messing with a figurine in the mantelpiece “rascal.”
You offered your hand to him (his handshake was strong, professional) and introduced yourself.
“I gotta say, this is really something else,” Richard said “Ransom hasn’t brought any girls home since high school.”
“I bring girls home all the time, I just don’t live with you anymore.”
The meaning of his words didn’t go unnoticed. You already knew he fucked other women on the side – or rather, there was no “side”; you guys weren’t a thing, and it wasn’t as if you only put out for him – but Richard understood him as well.
“Is that the kind of thing you say in front of your date? I thought we taught you better than this.”
“No, Richard. We really didn’t.”
You looked to the source of the voice, and spotted the woman who had to be Ransom’s other progenitor.
“Linda,” she extended her hand to you, but not a smile. Her handshake was even stronger than her husband’s.
Richard joined his son by the fireplace to fiddle with a pewter box, looking downright chastised. Ransom, for his part, seemed to be fighting the urge to laugh.
He had said his family was a mess, and that he found it all terribly fun. Up until now, you weren’t really sure you believed him.
“Whatever this” Linda pointed from her son to you, then back to him again “is about, I hope it ends soon, for your sake.” The last bit, she’d said while looking at you, then she left through a different archway than she’d entered from.
It seemed Ransom had inherited the charm from his father, but the ability to put the fear of God in those who crossed him came from his mother.
“Who else is here?” Ransom asked once Linda was out of earshot.
“Mostly everyone is in the library,” Richard replied, pinching the bridge of his nose, all the former friendliness leaving him like a deflating balloon “your grandfather locked himself in his office with the nurse, and who knows where they put Wanetta. Meg’s not coming.”
“What excuse did Joni come up with?”
“Schoolwork. Essays, whatever. I mean, it’s a Friday, it could wait.”
“She’s going to spend at least half of the evening doing drugs with a friend, easy.”
“Dope.”
Ransom snorted “Like she’s shooting up.”
Richard fixed his son with a disbelieving look. “No. Dope is weed. Dope was weed just yesterday.”
“It used to be.” Upon seeing the defeated expression on his father’s face, Ransom shrugged “World’s passing you by, man.”
That didn’t help. Richard looked back to the pewter box, turning it on his fingers like he was trying to find the best angle to see his reflection. Ransom stared at him for a second longer, then stepped away from the fireplace and exited through the same way his mother had.
He didn’t call you, so you assumed you weren’t needed at the moment, but then, what were you going to do with yourself – watch a man have an existential crisis?
You didn’t have to wait long to find out. You had been standing there, watching Richard sigh to himself for maybe a minute when three other people entered the room. The first was the woman who had opened the door for you; the second, a younger woman, with something almost doe-like about her, and the third…
Well, Harlan Thrombey didn’t need introductions – at least, not to you.
He was the first to speak, looking at the woman Ransom had called Frannie. “Seems like you aren’t going mad, Fran. Unless we all are, which is possible. Can you see her too?” And at that he turned to the other woman, who smiled at him. It was hard to tell whether her smile was fond or embarrassed.
Then, his eyes landed on you.
“Since you’re just standing around with this idiot,” He said. Richard gave a tight smile and tapped his fingers against the mantelpiece “I’m going to guess idiot number two left you to fend for yourself?”
This wasn’t the kind of welcome you’d expect when meeting your not-boyfriend’s family, but Ransom was eccentric, so maybe his relatives were as well. Maybe it was a rich people thing.
“I’m used to it, when it comes to Ransom” you offered.
Harlan grinned at you, but then again, he had been smiling since he entered the room. There was something very Ransom-like about both expressions.
He ambled to you, extending a hand which you rushed to grasp. His smile grew, but maybe that wasn’t good.
“I’m Harlan, the proprietor of this” he gestured to the room with both hands “little menagerie of horrors. And these,” he turned to the women “are Fran, my housekeeper, the only one who can keep this mess in order,” the woman who’d opened the door smiled and raised her hand in greeting, but she still seemed suspicious of you “and Marta, my caretaker. Heaven sent, I would already be dead if not for her.”
Marta had smiled at you as she was introduced, but frowned at the last comment.
“Don’t say that,” she admonished “you’re strong like a horse, you’re going to live for a million years, I’m sure.”
Harlan whimpered theatrically and extended a hand as if trying to grasp at something.
“Marta, is that you? It’s so dark, I can’t see. Oh, is that a light at the end of the tunnel?”
“Really? You’re impossible.” Marta huffed, and Harlan laughed.
They seemed close. Close enough that they’d forgotten all about you in their banter.
Once he was done with his joke Harlan turned back to you.
“I promise you I don’t get any more charming, but you get used to it with time.”
Time. Did he think you’d get to be around long enough to get used to anything there?
“Let’s... get this party started,” he said with a wink “I don’t ask you your name because I’m dying to see how my grandson will introduce you, and I don’t want to get attached.”
That answered that question.
You followed the party of three into another living room(parlor?), then another(fainting room? How many rooms for sitting could one person need?), then finally to what you presumed was the library (that could easily double as a living room), given the floor to ceiling bookcases in every wall that wasn’t occupied by a window. The room was large, large than any room in a house needed or had a right to be, and there were so many books on so many shelves there was no way Harlan would’ve been able to read them all, even accounting for his age.
Despite the exorbitance, the place was cozy and interesting, not at all a monochromatic art installation behemoth the likes of the Kardashian-West mansion (Which you didn’t care about in the slightest… one of your coworkers had shown you the pictures, it was all), the sort of thing you expected from people with too much money and no sense of comfort. The library was furbished with plush seats, nooks where one could hide in to read in peace, even a mezzanine, and– was that a sculpture inspired by “A Thousand Knives”?! Excessive, very excessive, and somehow also really cool. You were sure you could spend hours perusing books and examining baubles, but there were other people already in the room, and you had been raised too well to just ignore them when it was obvious you had already seen them.
Linda leaned against an open window, balancing an unlit cigarette between two fingers, and looking out, as if debating whether or not to have a smoke and whether or not doing so inside. There were a man and a woman on a pair of matching high-backed chairs, looking nervous and annoyed respectively as another woman talked at them, and a teenager speaking to Ransom in between typing things on his phone. He was the first to notice you’d entered the room and he directed a brief glare to you before his eyes landed on Marta.
“Well, no need to stand up or anything,” Harlan spoke from behind you, waving his hand as he passed.
“Dad, plea-” the sitting man began, but he stopped once he saw you. After a moment of confused staring by both parties, he looked back to Harlan “Is that-”
“Don’t know; she came with your nephew.”
All eyes were now on Ransom. He was enjoying the attention, if the stupid smug grin on his face was any indication.
“I brought a date. I figured I had to be the first to do it, since Meg thinks all sex is rape and Jacob’s an incel,” that earned him an elbow in the gut, which he barely reacted to.
“A date? Boohoo,” Harlan spoke, and you almost winced “I expected something more exciting from you.”
“Would you rather she was a notorious diamond thief and I brought her here to steal every red penny you own, old man?”
“That would be more on brand.”
“That’s it,” Marta said, placing her hands on his shoulders and directing him to an armchair in front of the knife sculpture “I’m putting you to bed earlier, abuelo.”
“Not without me throwing a tantrum, you’re not.”
Ransom’s uncle looked back and forth from his father, then to you, then to his nephew, before settling on you and standing up. He picked up a cane that was resting beside the armchair and wobbled toward you, smiling.
“Hello. I’m Walt, it’s a pleasure to meet you…”
You gave him your name, exchanged proper greetings, shook hands; his fingers were trembling slightly, but the length of the hand shake was very appropriate.
“I hope you like it here so far. Any friend of Ransom’s is welcome here.”
“You say that because you never met any of my friends.”
“You know what Ransom,” Walt turned gave him a sarcastic smile “I’m surprised you have any friends at all. You sure you not paying her to be here?”
You didn’t know exactly what it was that Walt had said, but something had set Ransom off.
“Why, you want a round with her? Don’t think you could afford it right now, pal.”
Walt’s lips were still pulled up into a smile, but his pupils were darting from side to side like he was searching for escape routes. That was fair, so were you.
“Don’t speak to my husband that way,” the woman who hadn’t said a single word to or even acknowledged your presence so far, gripped the seat’s armrest as she seethed at Ransom “it’s not his fault that-”
At that she fell silent and turned to Harlan, who was looking at everything with mild interest.
“Actually, you don’t have a job either, do you Donna?” Ransom continued. You knew that look; he was getting steam and you didn’t want to know what would come next.
“I think we’re all just a little stressed with everything that’s been going on,” the woman who had been silent so far – Ransom’s other aunt, you presumed, the one he wanted to suck his dick – mercifully cut in before he could get anything else out “I think we need to roll things back, maybe start over? I can go back to the car and get my crystals so we can do a-”
As if on cue, Fran entered again, a tray with a wine bottle and glasses in hand. She left everything on a coffee table, then walked by Marta, whispering something that convinced the younger woman to move to a more secluded corner of the room with her.
Donna perked up when the drink touched the table, and, smiling the well practiced smile of a hostess who did her duty with no joy, she started pouring drinks and handing them around. When one of the glasses was placed in your hands, you weren’t sure what to do. You rolled the stem in your fingers, pondering as the other adults drank and Jacob sulked.
“So,” Joni began, giving you an easy grin “you and Ransom have known each other for…”
As she trailed off, Linda chuckled, but she wasn’t looking at you.
“Eight months, give or take.” You answered.
The answer seemed to surprise her “Eight months? And how long have you been dating?”
“Oh, I’m not...” you turned to Ransom for help, but he was looking at his nails as if they were the most fascinating thing in the World or as if he really didn’t want to take part in this conversation “I’m not sure. We haven’t exactly made things official.”
It looked like she was fighting to keep her smile in place “And you met-”
“What do you do?” Linda interrupted, still looking out the window “Do you actually have a job or are you just expecting to scam someone here?”
You turned to Ransom; he had placed a hand over his heart and was looking at his mother as if he found her comment deeply offensive.
You hadn’t thought about what you would say if Ransom’s family decided to grill you, deciding it would be best not to overthink things as he’d suggested. A question about your job was expected – it was just harder to process it when it had been asked in such a manner.
“No, I- I’m an assistant editor at Little, Brown and Company.”
There was a splashing sound, and you looked just in time to see Walt trying to rub off a stain from his sweater with one hand, while holding his wine glass with trembling fingers. When he noticed you looking at him, he offered a stiff smile.
That was the wrong answer, it seemed. It was the truth, of course, but the reactions around you were discouraging. Linda huffed, Harlan chuckled, Joni nodded mechanically, Donna seethed as she wiped at her husband’s clothes with a napkin, Walt trembled, Jacob’s scowl deepened, the sound coming from Fran and Marta’s corner of the room ceased, and Ransom’s grin was the widest you had ever seen on his face.
“Really?” Linda asked, now focused on her son “Where do you find those people?”
He laughed. “What? I’m very charming.”
“I need to use the restroom,” you squawked. You didn’t really need the restroom, just any place other than there.
“I’ll show you where it is,” Marta said, as quickly as you had. Her eyes told you everything: she was also dying to get out.
You handed your drink over to Ransom and followed Marta out of the room, the two of you almost running down the hallway.
She led you to a lavatory, where you turned on the faucets to cover the sound of you whimpering and heaving inside. After splashing your face with some water, you exited the room to find her still waiting for you outside. She offered an apologetic smile.
“So…” you started, not sure of how to best broach the subject. Good thing she already knew what you wanted to get at.
“They aren’t always like this,” she said “they’re all good people, but things have been a little… you know how it can be with family, right?”
You nodded. “Yeah, it’s just a little… seems kind of a bad time for me to be showing up.”
“No, I think it helps. They are better behaved when there’s company.”
But that’s true of everyone.
“Ransom didn’t tell you about…? Anything?” She asked.
“No. He said it’d be fine.”
Marta’s expression was of doubt, but she didn’t say anything to discredit him.
“Are you okay to go back?”
“Yeah, I’ll be okay.”
She nodded and stared leading you back to the room.
“They’re good people, but can be a little much sometimes. You get used to it with time.”
“You- I’m sorry if I’m overstepping, but you don’t look that used to them yourself.”
She shrugged “I guess I just… haven’t been around long enough.”
The scene you returned to was different from the one you had run from. Linda had abandoned the window and reclined on one of the armchairs. Richard had made his appearance, leaning against a bookcase behind Linda; He kept a respectful (perhaps even safe) distance between the two. Walt, Jacob and Donna were squeezed in on a single couch, looking like they’d just been plucked from a stuffy family portrait. Joni lounged on a window seat, leaning her chin on one hand and swirling her wine with the other. Fran was nowhere to be found. Harlan, sat atop the chair in front of the halo of knives, looking every bit the magnanimous patriarch. Ransom had taken his place on an armchair, just beside another empty one. On his other side was a small table with two empty wineglasses. His legs were crossed and he had a wide, satisfied smile that you knew well – so you knew it couldn’t mean anything good.
You sat beside him and angled your body in a way you felt would rend a pretty picture, because that seemed to be the game they were playing, while Marta made her way to a corner and stood there, doing the most not to draw attention to herself. Smart.
“So,” Harlan began as you settled into your spot “I think you were telling us about your career?”
“Yes, but there really isn’t much else to say.” Unless they wanted to be bored, that is. You had more tales of spotting typos than of interesting literary works.
“You said you worked at Little, Brown and Co?” He asked and you nodded “How long have you been there?”
“Two years. It’s about all the experience I have working in the field, other than internships in college.”
“Ah, College.” He grinned, but didn’t explain what he found so amusing “What did you major in?”
“English literature, with a minor in communications.”
“Good, good. Topical. You two bonded over books, then?”
You turned to Ransom, who was looking at you with a lazy smile. You had never told him about your job, let alone what you had studied in college.
“Yep,” he said. You two talked about books sometimes, but you didn’t think those conversations had helped with any bonding.
“You know, I think it’s so good to see Ransom has found a positive influence,” Joni said. The affectation in her voice and mannerisms was suddenly much more noticeable, and it felt like an omen.
You turned to Ransom. His lips were pressed together into a thin line and his chest was swelling like he was gathering oxygen for a screaming match or something worse. The longer you spent around these people, the more you were convinced he wasn’t the only one who liked to needle others.
“Honestly, I-” the words tumbled out of your mouth and you could only hope they were the right ones “I’m not sure if he’s influenceable.”
Ransom was still scowling and for a moment you were afraid you had only made things worse, but then his mouth opened and he let out the air in his lungs with a low chuckle. Much better than being in the middle of another argument.
Fran walked back into the room before anyone else could start a scene and announced that dinner was ready. Apparently Harlan hadn’t been exaggerating when he said she was the only one who kept his house in order – all around you tense shoulders relaxed and frowning brows smoothed with the promise of a meal. You must’ve looked happy as well, given you hadn’t eaten a thing since lunch and your stomach was starting to hurt. There was also (and you wished the thought hadn’t run through your mind, but it did) the chance that Ransom and his family would be much less likely to speak if their mouths were stuffed with meatloaf.
You wished you didn’t have those sort of intrusive thoughts about people you had just met, but they weren’t making it easy for you. Marta had alluded to a “family situation” that had left them on edge, but you had never seen people react this badly to strangers. This was the stuff or nightmares, or at least of “Florida Man” news reports. They were supposedly worse when there wasn’t company? How much worse could they get?
Ransom had told you not to worry about dining with his family. Maybe he was so used to them he didn’t think the way they acted was all that strange; maybe he knew his family would behave the way they had but he decided not to warn you for purposes of fuckery; it didn’t matter all that much. The worst thing was knowing that they sucked as hard as he liked to say they did. If you chose to go on with your pregnancy, this is what you would be bringing your child into.
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inawickedlittletown · 4 years
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I’m With You (15/?)
Summary:
Having a crush was nothing to be ashamed of…lying to the family and friends of said crush about being the guy’s boyfriend, that was a whole other problem. When Buck saves the life of Andrew Diaz and accidentally makes a nurse think that he’s Andrew’s boyfriend, Buck soon finds himself lying to Andrew’s firefighter friends/coworkers as well as Andrew’s family including Andrew’s very suspicious and attractive brother, Eddie.
Based on the 1995 movie While You Were Sleeping.
Words: 3,384
Notes: This chapter was originally over 6k long, so during editing when I found a particularly good stopping point I decided to cut it into two. That also meant that i could post this today and not once I finish editing the rest of what used to be this chapter. So, here we are. Enjoy.  
Read on Ao3
Masterpost
Previous Chapter
The first person to call Buck’s new phone was Hen and he agreed to meet with her for coffee after he left the hospital because she insisted that they go and because Chimney had overheard the conversation on her end, he invited himself too. For good measure, Buck had gone ahead and invited Josh along. 
“I just wanted to see how you were doing,” Hen said. “Christopher getting hurt on your watch must have felt horrible.” 
“It did,” Buck admitted. And it was still bothering him a little. He knew logically it wasn’t his fault, but Christopher had been crying and whimpering in pain and Buck should have been able to protect him from it. Seeing him and how well he was handling his healing wrist had made Buck feel a little better. 
“What happened?” Josh asked. 
Buck explained with Hen piping in. 
“It was just a sprained wrist,” Chimney said. “Very minor, right Hen?” 
She nodded. “And things like that can happen at any time, especially with kids with CP. It’s really not your fault, Buck.” 
“I know,” Buck said. Eddie didn’t even blame him for it. “It still sucked.” 
Hen pat his hand on the table. “I know. I remember the first time Denny got hurt — I don’t know who was crying more, Denny or Karen.” 
Chimney and Buck grinned at each other and Josh laughed. Some of the weight from what happened to Christopher fell away as Hen started asking Josh questions about dispatch and Josh had plenty of stories. 
Eventually, the topic switched over to Andrew. 
“I stopped by last night,” Josh said. “He’s getting discharged tomorrow, right?” 
Buck nodded. He didn’t want to think about it too much. When Eddie had told him while they were visiting Andrew, Buck had tried not to show how panicked it made him to hear it. It was just that so far things had been a little strange. Andrew had to know Buck wasn’t his boyfriend...or if he didn’t know, he likely suspected something, and yet he wasn’t questioning anything and instead acting like Buck was his boyfriend. It was strange. 
Josh met his eyes and there was a question there about what was happening that Buck couldn’t answer.
“That’s good, then,” Josh said. “He’ll be back to normal in no time.” 
“Yeah,” Buck said. Everything would go back to normal. Including how much Buck didn’t belong. 
“We should throw him a welcome party,” Hen said. “I don’t want to overstep, Buck, but it’d be nice to get everyone together to welcome him home. Think it’s alright to do at his place?”
Chim looked like he was having too much fun with that going by the way he wiggled his eyebrows at Buck. Josh coughed to hide his amusement and it was lucky that Hen didn’t realize what they were on about. 
“Uh, that sounds like a good idea,” Buck said. 
“Good, good,” Hen said and then she started to plan. 
“She loves a good welcome back party,” Chimney explained. “In our line of work there’s always someone out for an injury. And I’m sure we’ll have another party when he gets back to work.” 
Hen nodded with a small smile. 
Buck was struck yet again by how much love there was among these people whose lives he’d shoved himself into. Something about it must have shown on his face because Josh nudged him. 
“Okay?” he mouthed at him. 
Buck nodded. Hen was talking about picking up a cake and Chimney was texting and presumably inviting anyone that should be at a welcome home party for Andrew. 
“Eddie says he won’t be discharged until sometime tomorrow and he can stall bringing him to the house for a little while if we need him to,” Hen said. “Good thing we’re not on shift tomorrow.”
“And look at that, neither am I,” Josh said. 
They looked to Buck. “Working early in the morning,” he said and it wasn’t something he could miss after the day of work that he’d already missed this week. 
“And we have to clean up the place a bit?” Hen asked, looking at Buck. 
“I did a bit of cleaning yesterday when I stopped by to feed Legolas but it’s still a bit of a mess after the earthquake.” 
“Okay,” Hen said. “So we’ll have to get there early to set up.” 
Buck nodded along and as all the details were ironed out, he tried to figure out if maybe this party might end up being the perfect time for him to come clean. They would all be there and he could explain the whole thing. And then when it was all over he could walk away and maybe things wouldn’t be that bad. If Buck mentally prepared himself for it, then it would be okay even if it hurt. It was definitely going to hurt. 
Josh hung back after Hen and Chimney headed off. “So, what is going on? Like, the truth?” 
“I have no idea. He doesn’t remember everything yet so I’m pretty sure he just thinks he’s forgotten me. The whole thing is messed up but I have to tell him, right? I can’t let him keep trying to remember me when he won’t be able to? I just haven’t been alone with him since that one day when he was pushing me to become a firefighter and I don’t even know what to make of that. I just — this is so weird.” 
Josh pulled him into a hug. “Everything will be okay, Buck. Even if it blows up in your face. I’ll still be your friend.” 
“Thanks,” Buck said and he meant it because he needed to know that he wouldn’t lose everyone.
“And I don’t think you’ll lose everyone either after it all comes out,” Josh said. 
Buck didn’t agree, but he didn’t feel like arguing that point. 
He and Josh parted ways and Buck headed towards his Jeep.
—-
Eddie went on his own to pick Andrew up from the hospital because everyone else including Abuela and Pepa were at Andrew’s house for the surprise welcome home party. When he arrived at the hospital room, Andrew hadn’t been discharged yet. 
“Waiting on the doctor,” Andrew explained. 
So Eddie sat down. “And how are you doing? Remembering more?” 
“A bit,” Andrew said and then after a short moment, “quite a bit.” 
“The dog? Buck?” Eddie asked at once and maybe he was a little too eager. 
Andrew chuckled. “I don’t even like Lord of the Rings, Eddie. I have no idea whose dog that is.” 
“I thought you liked the movies. Wait, you used to read the books when we were kids...and I remember a very long rant about The Hobbit movies”
Andrew just blinked at him. “I don’t remember everything,” he said with a shrug. “But, I remembered your ex. Christopher’s mother.” 
“You don’t remember your own boyfriend, but you remember her,” Eddie said incredulously. 
Andrew chuckled. “He’s great, though, isn’t he? Buck. I really like him. I haven’t gotten to spend too much time alone with him, but as far as I can tell he’s a pretty great guy and I wouldn’t be here without him, would I? I was actually trying to push him into joining the LAFD. I think it would be a great fit for him, wouldn’t you?”
Eddie nodded. “Yeah, I guess it would be.” 
“And he’s nice to look at, isn’t he? Really well fit, I’ve been meaning to ask him about his workout routine. Everyone seems to like him. I kind of get it, I guess, even if I don’t remember. Mom and dad seem to like him more than your ex.”
It wasn’t surprising that Andrew liked Buck. Somewhere deep down, Andrew probably did remember how he felt about Buck — his attraction to Buck. And that made Eddie’s jaw clench a little and make him want to snap at Andrew. Mostly it also made Eddie a horrible person and a horrible brother. He had no claim on Buck. He had no right to be upset about the way that Andrew talked about Buck. 
“Anyway, I don’t remember him, but what I know of him now I like. Did you know he lived in South America for a while? He didn’t say where but I think it’s so cool that he did his own thing and just went where he wanted to. I admire him for it.”
Eddie couldn’t remember if he’d known that about Buck or not. 
“And considering the coffee he makes, I can only imagine how good he is at mixing drinks,” Andrew said and he looked thoughtful for a moment. “Also, I keep meaning to ask if that’s a scar on his eyebrow or something else. I can’t remember, obviously, but it suits him, don’t you think?” 
Eddie tampered down the possessive monster inside of him that wanted nothing more than to stop Andrew from continuing to talk about Buck as if he actually knew him and as if he liked him or felt more for him even though of course Andrew felt that way about Buck. They were dating. Eddie was just...he was stupid enough to not have good control over his feelings. 
“It’s a birthmark, I think,” Eddie said and tried to be nonchalant.
“Must be why it fits him so well,” Andrew said with a decisive nod. 
Eddie wanted the doctor to get there and discharge Andrew already. He checked his phone. Hen was giving him the okay to bring Andrew home. Eddie couldn’t help but wonder if Buck would stick around at Andrew’s place, if he was looking forward to having him out of the hospital. Eddie had to push those thoughts away. 
“Have you spoken to mom and dad?” Eddie asked, making the effort to change the subject. 
“Yes,” Andrew said. “Got my phone charged so I got caught up on a few things and called them. She’s been texting me practically every hour.” 
“That’s mom,” Eddie said. “She worries.” 
“Yeah, I got that.” 
It was another twenty minutes before a doctor finally appeared with the discharge papers and instructions to do with the headaches that Andrew was still having. He had some meds to take for the pain, but he was essentially in good health other than the memory loss. 
“Finally,” Andrew said when they were out of the hospital and walking to Eddie’s car.
Weirdly as much as Eddie was glad that his brother was finally out of the hospital and okay, he also hated him a little. Eddie was cognizant of himself enough to realize that at least some of that was to do with Buck and the feelings that sat on his chest and didn’t seem keen on leaving. 
“I remember your car,” Andrew said somewhat cheerily. “And I drive—” he took a moment to think about it. 
The same moment in which Eddie had to wonder about why none of them had thought to think of Andrew’s car. Eddie should have been the one to think about that and maybe he would have if the hospital had given him Andrew’s things. And actually, come to think of it, Buck hadn’t given them Andrew’s keys even though he was probably the one that had them. 
“I drive a Jeep,” Andrew said. 
Until Andrew said it, Eddie hadn’t even thought about how Buck and Andrew drove the same type of car. Maybe it was yet another thing that had bonded them. Seeing all those connections, the way that Andrew didn’t remember Buck but already seemed entirely fond of him, it made him want to scream. 
“You do,” Eddie said but refrained from telling him that his car had probably been towed in the unlikely event that it wasn’t still wherever Andrew had parked it. 
—-
So maybe Andrew was messing with Eddie a little. It was just that Andrew wanted to know for sure if what he’d seen on Eddie the other day was more than admiration for Buck but something deeper. And from the way that Eddie seemed to be both a bit quieter and a bit stiff that he was in his head about something. Likely Buck. 
It was interesting. A bit ironic in a way, too, and Andrew had figured out how he was going to punish Buck for what he’d done. If it messed with his brother a bit too, well, that was just a nice side effect. 
The drive over to his house was a little familiar and then when Eddie parked, he knew which house was his. Slowly things filled themselves into his head. It was weird the way that things would just fit into place and he knew them. Maybe, it was going to be the same once he saw the dog. Legolas. His phone had given him next to no information about the dog. Andrew didn’t even have pictures of him.
“Familiar?” Eddie asked. 
“Yeah,” Andrew said. “It’s home.”
As the words left his mouth, though, they didn’t feel true and Andrew didn’t know what to make of that because this was his home.  
“My car isn’t here,” Andrew said when he paused at the bottom of the steps. 
Eddie grimaced. “About that,” he said. “We, um, we forgot about it.” 
“You forgot about it,” Andrew said. 
“Look, I will take care of everything. I think Pepa assumed Buck would have done it but we were all a bit distracted with you in a coma and everything. But I’ll figure all of that out tomorrow.” 
Andrew couldn’t even really be mad. It was the whole Buck problem rearing its head again. 
They walked up the steps and Andrew noticed that there were a few cracks on the concrete that he knew hadn’t been there before. And when Eddie opened the door, it didn’t glide in like usual. Andrew barely had time to focus on that though because the last thing Andrew expected was to step inside and have everyone yell “Surprise!” 
—-
Christopher still had a bandage around his wrist and it was a reminder to Buck of what he’d allowed to happen even if no one else blamed him for it. Not even Christopher who had hugged Buck when he first arrived at Andrew’s house with Isabel and Pepa and then followed him around and tried to help him with whatever Buck was doing. 
Isabel had recently been in the hospital too after a bad fall, but she was doing fine and she’d only gone because she hadn’t been able to get up on her own and she thought she might have injured her hip but she’d had her phone close by and managed a call to 9-1-1. Mostly, Pepa was keeping her seated and comfortable because the fall had left her bruised up. It made Buck hesitate on wanting to tell everyone the truth, but then again most things made him rethink it and too much time had passed. Buck needed to tell them. 
“You look like you’re worrying about something,” Josh said. 
“I’m telling them,” Buck said. “Today.” 
Josh raised an eyebrow at him and pat his shoulder. “Things have been going so well lately, do you really want to just blow that up?” 
“Andrew is going to remember everything any day now. Him coming home is just going to make that process even faster and then what?”
Josh sighed. “Look, there’s things you don’t—”
“Josh, I can’t keep lying,” Buck said. “It’s too...it’s different now that he’s awake. This has gone on way too long.”
“Yeah, I get that, but maybe wait a little longer or I don’t know, have you considered talking to Andrew and explaining.” 
The idea of talking to Andrew about it first had merit, but Buck just didn’t know if would be possible for Buck to do it during a party that meant that Andrew would likely be surrounded by people all the time. 
“Maybe,” Buck said. 
Hen was the one to get the text that Eddie and Andrew were on their way from the hospital which meant that the last minute details had to be worked out. 
“Is she like this at every party?” Buck asked. 
Athena chuckled. “Surprise parties, yes. Easier to go along with whatever she wants though.” 
Karen nodded in agreement. Buck took it in, the way that Athena smiled and the way that Karen nodded even while he eyes shone with pride and love for her wife. He was going to miss them. He was going to miss all of them. 
Legolas started barking when they heard Eddie and Andrew outside and Buck had to wonder if that was because the dog knew that his owner was home. When Eddie opened the door, everyone shouted “surprise!” and Andrew looked taken aback. 
“Seriously?” Andrew asked through a laugh. 
“We had to,” Hen said and she was the first one to rush over and hug him. 
Buck’s attention was on Legolas who did rush over but only sniffed at Andrew before jumping at Eddie who pet his head lightly before Legolas turned back to Andrew. It was curious. Legolas had been more excited to see Christopher when he first got to the house and if Buck was allowed to think it, the dog had been more excited to see him. But Andrew was his owner...his person and the dog was treating him just like anyone else. 
Eddie had said it a lot though, Andrew didn’t like dogs. Maybe Legolas could sense that. The whole it was getting more and more confusing. If Buck didn’t know any better that dog had insinuated himself into Andrew’s life just like Buck had. 
Andrew hugged Pepa and walked over to the couch to hug Isabel and then his eyes found Buck. Buck didn’t know what to do. Did he rush over and hug him or did he wait to see what Andrew would do. He decided to leave it up to Andrew. 
“Hey,” Andrew said. 
Buck felt like everyone was watching them. Tentatively, Buck moved towards Andrew. He smiled and went in for a quick hug, the kind that was awkward and unsure because Buck had no idea how familiar he was allowed to be. Andrew leaned into the hug, but he didn’t linger, pulling back and ending the hug quick as it had begun. 
“Really?” Hen asked. 
“What?” Buck said. 
“That hug was pathetic,” Hen said with a roll of her eyes. “It’s no wonder he doesn’t remember you if you can’t even hug him properly. Your boyfriend is home, Buck, you should be kissing him...I bet you haven’t even done that and he’s been awake for a while now.” There was judgement in her eyes at least instead of suspicion. 
Buck felt his cheeks go warm. He didn’t know what to say and over Andrew’s shoulder he met Chim’s eyes who looked like he found the whole thing hilarious and couldn’t wait to poke fun at the situation. No one else stepped forward to welcome Andrew home. 
“Uh, not doing that in front of all his family,” Buck said in a low tone. 
His eyes met Andrew’s and because they were still standing close enough, it didn’t take Andrew any effort at all to take Buck’s hand and pull him even closer. 
“What—”
Andrew made a show of rolling his eyes, he was smirking too in a strangely knowing way, the twists of his lips making it seem like he was accepting a challenge and then he drew Buck even closer and he kissed him. 
It was chaste, more of a peck than anything else and it lasted seconds and afterwards Andrew laughed and he threw an arm around Buck’s shoulders. Buck felt lost, like he had no idea what had just happened or why. The next few moments were a blur of standing close to Andrew who’s lips had felt fluffy and soft even while chapped, and who was still undeniably hot even after just getting out of the hospital. Kissing him was no hardship and a part of Buck — the part that still had a bit of a crush — wanted the kiss to last longer than it did. The trance was broken only once Andrew let him go and stepped back and then he was gone. 
Next Chapter
Notes: Sooo, did any of you expect things to go there? I just love Andrew sooo much and he was particularly fun to write in this chapter. Let me know what you all thought and thanks for reading. 
If anyone wants to be tagged in future chapters, let me know. :)
Tagging: @tranquility-or-chaos @diazbuckleysworld @stilesgivesmefeels
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Fanfic Author Meme
Tagged by @diligent-thunder and @rockmarina​ =)
Okay, so I’m me, and I talked way too much, so I’m putting this under a cut to save your dashes. You’re welcome 😘
Please do not reblog this post.
Author Name: 
Fleetofshippyships + Knowyourincantations + Legendaryroar
Fandoms You Write For: 
(in order of decreasing # of fics) Harry Potter, Voltron, Merlin, Yuri on Ice, Star Trek, Star Wars and then a few one-offs that aren’t really worth mentioning.
Where You Post: 
AO3 primarily, Tumblr, trying to post more on Pillowfort, I also post on a couple of sites for knowyourincantations
Most Popular One-Shot: 
Fleetofshippyships: Potter’s Insatiable Cock (Drarry, Explicit (duh XD), 20k (viewable only for logged-in AO3 users)).
Knowyourincantations: A Decent Start to Things (Pansmione, Teen, 7k)
Legendaryroar: Finding Time for Rest (Sheith (Voltron), Teen, 3k)
Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: 
RestraintNone of my old multi-chapter fics are available to read at this time and I don’t really write multi-chapter fics anymore.
If oneshot/drabble collections or two-shots count, then:
Fleetofshippyships: Vanilla and Sweet Spices (Drarry, Explicit, 2 chapters, 20k)
and this really doesn’t count, but technically it has multiple ‘chapters’ soooooooooo
Legendaryroar: Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships (Voltron), Explicit (duh), 31 ‘chapters’, 26k)
Favourite Story You Wrote: 
I don’t think I ever have a static favourite, I’ve just written too many things, I too quickly move on to the next (and frequently forget some of my own fics exist XD), but recently I re-read In Pursuit of Red Wine (Dreville, Teen, 29k) and really enjoyed that again, and I am really attached to it cos it was my first longish rarepair fic, kind of proving to myself that I can write longer rarepair stuff. 
I also recently re-read Unburdened (Merthur (BBC Merlin), Explicit, 2k) and really enjoyed that too, had a total disconnect from having written it since it’s been so long, so I was able to read it without self-judging, and oh boy that was nice. 
I’m also quite proud of Healing What’s Left (Parkgrass, Teen, 2k) for some reason, I dunno, maybe the dark political backdrop of the fic, or maybe just cos it’s the first time I’ve written Daphne as the main character and I’m happy with the result and now have some headcanons about her rather than her being an unknown blank character to me. 
I also binge read a lot of my Voltron stuff recently and had big feels over that so....I also specifically enjoyed re-reading The Perks of Skincare (Klance (Voltron), Explicit, 3k) again cos I dunno, I like how I wrote Lance XD and also the Sheith fic I linked earlier is a fav for sure. Shiro/Rest is the ultimate OTP.
It really depends how soon after I write something or when I go back to re-read it as to what my fav is at any given time (or people commenting on it and hyping me up for it again).
Story You Were Nervous to Post: 
Everything. But most recently I was terrified out of my mind before posting: 
Friday Night by the Fire (Harry/Neville, Teen, 583 words) because I have a lot of fears about screwing up trying to write ace characters and somehow not even making that a focal point of the drabble made it even more terrifying,  No More Waiting (TianShan (19 Days), Teen, 2k) because it was a new fandom to write in, Harry Potter and the Maudlin Merman series (Drarry, Teen+ Mature, 3k +6k) due to my feelings of inadequacy because it would be better as long fic but I struggle too much with writing these days to write long fics and can only manage short things. I’d rather write this as a long fic, but then I’d never finish it so connected oneshots are the best I can do right now, but I still feel it’s not good enough and have a meltdown whenever I post one. And speaking of which, I’ve been sitting on the next one for months and should probably just fucking post it already.
Actually, most recently: Minding One’s Limits (Cho/Ginny, G rated, 1.5k), because I gave Cho a disability modeled off my fibromyalgia and wrote a scenario similar to something I’d dealt with myself, it was incredibly uncomfortable to write in the first place, and then terrifying to post, even though it’s so short. But in the end I’m proud I finally wrote about it a bit? I dunno, might take me a while to work up the nerve again though XD (also was my first time writing that ship, so there was a lot of nervousness over that too)
Oh, and I was a super ball of anxiety posting  Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships, Explicit, 31 ‘chapters’, 26k) because for almost all of those it was the first time I was writing those kinks (and some were kind of squicks for me but I wanted to see if I could write them anyway cos I’m dumb like that) and in a lot of cases those ships were completely new for me to write too, in addition to trying to write and post 1 a day, so...yeah. Also that was my first time writing tentacle and human/werewolf smut so...yeah. I was an absolute mess that month and not in a fun way. But I’m still really glad I did it, it was fun =D
In summary, I’m always an anxious mess posting anything, but most especially if it’s something I’ve not written before or is personal to me XD
How Do You Choose Your Titles: 
Most of the time I’m staring down the empty title field in AO3 cursing like a fucking sailor when I choose titles XD Sometimes it’s a line/theme/feeling from the fic. Sometimes it’s totally random and just comes to me. Sometimes I just grasp the first thing that I can no matter how stupid it sounds cos it’s been three days and I still don’t have a title and I’m over it and ready to post before I lose my nerve.
And tbh, it’s only getting harder to think of titles as my number of fics increases, and I’ve now started thinking of the perfect titles only to realise I already have a published fic by that title so....TITLES CAN DIE A FIERY DEATH
Sometimes, not so much anymore, it would turn out that I would give a wip doc a name just so I’d know what it was, sometimes as a joke with whoever was reading it and cheerleading while I wrote it, and then I would refer to it by that and think of it as that so much that when it came time to actually give the fic a title, it was too late and I could not think past that stupid file name, and that’s how Potter’s Insatiable Cock happened, and how I very nearly called a Merthur fic Arthur’s Wanking Tower (saved that one at the last moment thank god cos the tone of that fic is actually really serious and emotional and wtf was I even thinking with that file name and actually I linked to that fic above XD it ended up being called Unburdened). 
Potter’s Insatiable Cock slipped through cos it’s actually relevant to the fic content and I could live with it.
But needless to say, I don’t give my wip docs joke names anymore XD
Do You Outline: 
Only if I never want to actually write the idea...once I outline, it’s over. I can’t write to a detailed plan. It stifles me. I’ll always get stuck having to try and think ahead to the plan, and then I lose the flow and nothing works because I’m a pantser/intuitive/instinctive writer not a planner. Sometimes I jot down ideas but in like, the vaguest of ways, usually more focused on emotional development than actual scenes or events or anything because then I won’t be able to write it (and I rarely stick to those vague ideas anyway). 
I can really only write when I’m staring down a blank doc with no idea where it’s going and discover it as I go (which is why writing is so fun for me). I can only finish a fic if I don’t think too hard about what’s going to happen next and just let it happen as I write. 
This of course means that editing is a fucking bitch when I finish anything, beginnings often get totally re-written, but if I plan, it just doesn't happen at all, so I’ll take the extra editing if it means I manage to write something.
I do have a lot of detailed plotty fic idea outlines...and I mourn them cos I’m never going to write them now, but they’re so goooooooooood XD
Complete: 
Online (across all 3 accounts): 381 (incl. my hidden drarry fics as they are technically online just hidden, not incl. individual oneshots/drabbles in collection ‘fics’, of which there are ridiculously many). Offline: 20 (I have the worst habit of just sitting on completed fics and I really need to stop)
In-Progress: 
Too many to name, last time I counted it was ~60 but that wasn’t even including my vld wips so...I don’t actually know. I hoard wips and just switch up what I work on all the time depending on mood/interest levels/effort required. 
Current main focuses are a 50k+ plotty Drarry (*fingerscrossed* cos this is my first time seriously attempting something long (will probably reach 80k at least) in a very long time and I put it down for a few months and thought that was it but then I picked it up again recently, yay!), and re-writing some hidden fics I can’t put them back up in the quality they’re in, I just can’t guys, they’re awful.
I’ve been thinking a lot about working on the longish 8th year Pansmione fic I started for the wlw big bang before I had to pull out of cos stupid life stuff. I might pick that up again for a bit too, couldn’t be more different from the Drarry one so it’d make a nice focus break =)
Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: 
I don’t even plan fics I’m writing, I sure don’t plan ahead to stuff I haven’t even started XD The only think I can think of for this category would be me re-writing my hidden long Drarry fics.
Oh, and there will be a Merthur oneshot coming (hopefully) soon, because @april-thelightfury115​ won my custom fic giveaway with a merthur idea. Just waiting for my brain to cooperate so I can start that and not suck XD but I’m so fucking excited to write some Merthur again, you have no idea.
Oh, and lots more Sapphic September drabbles coming too, I’m way behind and only just posted day 11 cos this month is literal hell for me, but I am still planning on finishing the prompt list, no matter how long it takes, but no plan for those, not even which ships, I just sit down with the next prompt and a blank doc and see what happens.
Do You Accept Prompts: 
Yes, I love writing to prompts, I’m take them via google form here, but I’m in such a bad space with my health I’ve been really struggling with writing lately, managed to do a bit of editing (fuck knows how), but writing new stuff is so hard, so there’s a long wait while I wait for my fibro fog to ease off to the point I can write new stuff with more regularity (and less stupid errors I have to edit out later).
Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: 
Again, I so don’t plan. But I really want to be making more progress on the long plotty drarry wip I’m trying to write. I’m still not sure I’ll have the guts to post it even if I do finish it, given its subject matter (it would make a great careers or consent fest fic tbh), but damn I’m really excited by it. Not sure I can maintain it being plotty and not revert to focusing on the relationship (which is easier for me), but I can only try and see what happens. (trying to write a non-relationship plot without planning is a nightmare but I don’t have a choice if I want to write it at all XD)
I’m also now excited for my longish pansmione wip too actually, just because it’s already longer than my Dreville long-ish fic and it’s exciting and scary to do longer rarepair stuff. I’m way out of my comfort zone with the fic itself, but I dunno, I re-read some recently and fell in love with it all over again, like, flustered lesbian-awakening, disaster for Pansy (but sure she still hates her) Hermione? YES PLEASE! and also, I am guilty of not writing female characters as much as I should because, well, canonically, they don’t have much depth and I’m very meh about them, but in this there’s a huge focus on them because they’re all determined to band together for 8th year and Hermione is making friends with them (Parvati is like, dragging her along all the time XD) where she once dismissed them so it’s scary but exciting =D I’m getting more practice with all the sapphic I do over on knowyourincantations, so I feel more confident working on this wip now =D
I’m also kind of excited about re-writing my old long fics, because they’re all 3 years old now, and my writing tastes (and skill, yikes) have totally changed, so it’s like I’m writing the story again but how I would write it now while maintaining the overall same plot, so it’s really interesting, like discovering the story all over again. Like in one (Making Malfoy Blush) I’ve gone as far as introducing a new side character to replace another’s parts because I no longer feel those parts are in character for them. It’s super terrifying, but it’s fun at the same time =) it’ll take me forever to do these though, so I dunno about ‘upcoming’ really, I only chip away every now and then when I’m unable to write new stuff but am still coherent enough to do something.
Eh, it is what it is, I can’t write like I used to, hence me being inactive more than active these days, but I’m trying to work within my new limitations instead of getting frustrated with them and just giving up entirely =)
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Now, who to tag....I think anyone I would tag has already done it, and if not..I blame the fog if I’m forgetting someone obvious, if you wanna do it just say I tagged you so I can be nosy and take a look =)
Again, please do not reblog this post
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