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midnightsnyx · 3 years

Text

Mathew Barzal - A Year In The Making

pairing: mat barzal/reader

word count: 5.5k

warnings: fluff, angst (me writing sad stuff?? shocker), and there may be a couple swear words? also, this is not edited so i apologize in advance lol

a/n: so this isn’t the soulmate mat fic i am supposed to be writing lol but its still mat! i’ve been working on it f-o-r-e-v-e-r for @hannahmb so hannah, i hope you like it!

my masterlist

Mat Barzal

Summary: Y/N looks back on an entire year with Mat.

January

When you say that meeting Mathew Barzal swept you off your feet, you mean he literally swept you off your feet. It was cold and icy when you were walking to your favorite coffee shop. You weren’t watching where you were walking so when you ran in to him, his foot accidentally (and you question to the day whether it was truly accidental) tripped you up, he managed to catch you before you fell and when you looked at him and saw warm hazel eyes and brown hair sticking out from under his gray hat, you knew you were a goner.

. . .

You knew the reputation hockey players had. They slept around, didn’t give girls a second look after they got what they wanted and you were dead set on never giving Mathew Barzal a second thought but when you ran into him at the grocery store and he asked you to go for coffee, you agreed.

Looking back, it was probably the dumbest and smartest decision of your life.

Coffee led to lunches which led to a movie night at his place which led you to your first hockey game. You knew absolutely nothing about hockey but what you did know, was that Mat loved to celebrate after a win. Whether it was heading to the bar with a couple of his friends or spending the night home watching a movie, he was always in the best mood after.

After your first game, he decided that the best way to celebrate was to go for a walk and get hot chocolate with you. Despite only knowing each other for a little under a month, it felt like the two of you had been the best of friends forever. It was something that attracted you to Mat. How easily he was able to get you to open up to him and vice versa - how much he trusted you with his thoughts and feelings.

It’s definitely how you found yourself standing under a lamppost, snow falling around you like some cheesy romance novel and Mat kissing you softly.

And thinking back, you wouldn’t have changed a single thing.

February

Things between you and Mat were… interesting to say the least. You weren’t a couple but you know that both of you weren’t seeing other people either. Labels were messy anyways. They caused more tension between the two of you than good. Your friends, however, had their opinions.

“I just think it’s a little weird that he hasn’t asked you to make things official yet.” Your friend said. “I mean, you don’t know what he does on the road or during the nights you don’t spend together.”

Her words certainly hit a sore spot but you tried to brush it off. “It’s casual,” you said. “We don’t want to jump into anything.”

“If you say so.” She hummed, going back to eating her pasta.

Her words were in the back of your mind though, no Mater how hard you tried to push them out. You and Mat had been open about not seeing other people, it was a lengthy discussion that made you feel better about not putting a label on anything. But, there’s always the possibility that he would change his mind. You didn’t know what he did on the road. Maybe your friend was right, and even though you and Mat had talked about it, perhaps it was just his way of making sure you stuck around while he was home.

Maybe you were just the pathetic girl that waited at home for him while he did whatever he wanted while on the road.

March

You’d swept your uneasy feelings about Mat under the rug until a Snapchat video surfaced of him on the internet. It was him with the other guys sitting at a table in a bar with some girls sitting with them.

They were sitting with Mat and not on him is what you kept telling yourself. He didn’t look like he was interested in them but you couldn’t get rid of the awful feeling in the pit of your stomach that he would take one of them home with him.

You knew that letting your friend’s words about him would ruin things but you couldn’t help it. So you ignored him when he called you the next morning. He knew that you had early classes and wouldn’t call you after games when the time zones would be too different.

You ignored his call and then the texts he sent. He would be home the next day so you decided he could wait until then because you still weren’t sure what exactly to say to him. What would you tell him? That you didn’t believe him when he said that he only wanted to see you? That you didn’t trust him, or that you let your friends words get to you?

You still didn’t know what to say when he showed up at your apartment. He looked worried and mad and you weren’t sure which was worse.

“What’s wrong?” was the first thing he asked. There was no hello, how are you?

“Nothing.” You lied but he shook his head.

“I know you better than that.” He said. “Something’s wrong.”

You wanted to lie to him again, tell him it was nothing, and to forget about it but you needed to know.

“Those girls in the video.” You said, and he looked confused for a moment before his expression turned into understanding. “I know we aren’t a couple, technically,” you said quietly and watched as he slowly walked towards you. “But it bothered me.”

You waited for his reaction, watched his face warily. What you weren’t expecting was for him to take both your hands in his and squeeze them gently.

“Can I be honest with you?” He asked softly and even though you weren’t ready for his honesty, you nodded.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you that entire night.” He chuckled and shook his head. “Tito kept asking me why I wasn’t making a move on one of them.” His head tilted a little as he studied you. “But all I could think about that night was how much I wanted you to be there with me.”

You couldn’t hide the smile that crossed your face and you wrapped your arms around his waist and hid your face in the crook of his neck.

“I kinda wished I was there too.” You whispered and your smile widened when he picked you up and spun you around. He was laughing when he put you down.

“Let’s go out tomorrow night. A couple of the guys and their girlfriends or wives are going to Joe’s.” He gave you a hesitant look but continued. “I want to introduce you to them.”

Your brows furrowed. “I’ve met your teammates.”

“I want-” he cleared his throat. “I want to introduce you as my girlfriend.”

Your smile could have lit up the room.

April

You quickly learned that being exclusive wasn’t all that it was cut out to be. There was a certain pressure that came with dating a professional athlete and as time went on, you felt yourself begin to crack under that pressure. You weren’t sure if it was the media, intense fans or the fact that it was difficult to spend as much time together during the Playoffs but you started to question things with Mat.

Your mother always told you that you were an over thinker and always managed to think of the worst possible scenarios and though you would never admit it to her, she was damn right.

Your overthinking is what typically caused an fight between you and Mat. You were never one to pick fights but it just felt like every single thing that happened made you upset. Whether it was you feeling that he played video games too much when the two of you hung out or that he thought you made a big deal out of small things, the two of you were arguing all the time.

It left you spending many nights questioning whether being with him was even worth it when all it seemed to do was cause stress. You wondered if he ever thought the same things.

. . .

The loud cheering in the Barclays Centre did no good to your mood on a Monday afternoon game. You weren’t even sure why you went to the stupid game in the first place after a terrible argument between you and Mat the night prior. It might have been Tito’s many, many texts that day asking you to come because “Mat is always in a bad mood when you don’t come to games” that had you sitting in the stands sporting your Barzal jersey. You knew that you were welcomed in the Wives Lounge but sometimes you enjoyed sitting surrounded by random people you didn’t know and not having to socialize.

It definitely was a good idea at the time because yours and Mat’s fight had unfortunately been in front of some of his teammates and their other halves so you didn’t feel like getting questioned about it.

A loud bang caused you to nearly jump out of your seat and when you looked up, Tito was standing in front of you, grin on his face and waving. You had been distracting yourself on your phone so you wouldn’t look at Mat during warm-ups but you caught his eye when Tito had made you look up. You couldn’t really read the expression on his face. Part was probably irritation and the other maybe relief that you had shown up. The door slamming in his face the night before was probably still fresh in his mind.

Tito waving his hand in front of you brought you back from the memory and he had a puck in his hand, pointing it to you. You furrowed your brows at him because you already had a few pucks from games when you and Mat had first started dating because he had a habit of gifting you with a lot of Islanders things. So you caught it when he chucked it over the glass, intending to give it to the kid sitting next to you until you caught sight of some scribbles on the back. You flipped the puck over and your heart warmed when you realized it was Mat’s handwriting.

I’m sorry with a small heart was written messily on it and when you looked up and caught Mat’s eyes, you smiled and nodded and that must have been enough for him because he grinned and winked at you.

It was enough for now.

. . .

Meeting him at the locker room doors was not anything unusual but you were on edge that evening. You were pretty sure Mat had forgiven you for slamming the door in his face the night before but you were still nervous. When the guys started coming out of the locker room, dressed back in their game suits and grins on their faces, you kept your eyes trained on the doors waiting for Mat.

“He’ll be a few more minutes.” Tito said, stopping in front of you. “He’s doing an interview - game winning goal scorer and all.”

You smiled and let him ruffle your hair like you were his little sister despite the age difference between you two being minor. He always treated you like a sister from the moment you met and you liked that compared to some of Mat’s other young teammates who tried flirting with you in the beginning.

“Thanks, Tito.” You said, waving as he smiled again and walked away.

A little longer than a few more minutes, Mat walked through the doors. He was dressed in his suit again and his hair was wet from the quick shower he must have taken before coming out.

“Hey.” He said quietly, hesitating as if he had been trying to decide whether to approach you or not. When you held out your arms, he walked straight to you and wrapped his around you, lifting you off the ground slightly.

The two of you stood there for what felt like longer than it probably was before he loosened his arms and pulled away a little.

“I’m sorry.” He said, resting his forehead against yours.

“Me too,” you told him and stood on the tips of your toes so you could reach his lips. The kiss was gentle and slow and when you pulled away, you took a step back. “The fight was stupid and we both know it.”

He nodded and ran a hand through his hair. “I know. I just… I feel like sometimes we fight for no reason and it frustrates me. I hate being mad with you.”

Deciding that Barclays Centre wasn’t the right place for his conversation, you took his hand and pulled him towards the exit.

“Let’s go home and talk.” You said and he nodded, squeezing you hand gently and pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

As you both walked to his car, you idly wondered when home stopped being a place and instead became a person.

May

The Islanders got put out of the playoffs during the second round and although you knew Mat was upset, he shrugged and said, “there’s always next year.” You wondered if that was what got professional athletes through the losses in their careers.

The end of the hockey season meant Mat going home to B.C and it left you in an odd place. He didn’t directly ask you to come with him for the off season but the way he described his summer plans, made it seem like you were involved.

But you being you prevented you from outright asking if he wanted you to come home with him. It was a big step and you weren’t sure you could handle the rejection.

As the date he was leaving quickly approached, he asked if the two of you could talk and your stomach plummeted at his words. You agreed though and during the drive to his apartment, you mentally prepared yourself for the rejection.

He greeted you at the door with a kiss which eased some of your worries but when he started making you your favourite ice tea, you started getting worried. He was mindlessly babbling about random things until he sat on the stool next to you and when you looked at him, he was uncharacteristically serious.

“You could have told me you didn’t want to come to B.C,” he said. “I wouldn’t have been offended, I know you have friends here and probably had summer plans-”

“Mat.” You said quickly, cutting him off. “I want to come with you. To your home.”

He stopped his babbling and looked at you in shock. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah.”

“But you didn’t say.”

“Well I mean, you never asked.”

He rose his eyebrows comically high. “I didn’t think I had to.”

A smile broke out across your face and you leaned forwards so you could kiss him. He chased after you when you sat back making your grin widen. “I just didn’t want to push. We spend nearly all year together so I didn’t know if you wanted space for the summer.”

“Y/N.” He said seriously. “I want to be with you. Forever.”

And if that wasn’t the sweetest and most romantic thing a man had ever said to you, you weren’t sure what was.

June

Summer with Mat was, well, amazing. Days spent on the lake and nights spent under the stars ended up making that summer one of the best in your life.

Meeting his family for the first time was equally frightening as it was exciting. His father, Mike and mom Nadia were two of the kindest people you met and you quickly bonded with his sister Liana. They took you in as if you were their own and Mat frequently joked that they were stealing you from him.

You didn’t mind though. You loved spending days shopping at the mall or going to the beach with Liana. Brunch with his mom was always lovely and she always managed to tell you the funniest and most embarrassing stories about Mat. It gave you a little leverage when you needed it and on top of that, Mat was overly cute when he would pout at you jokingly poking fun of him.

Every single day, you realized you fell a little more in love with him and that realization nearly knocked you off your feet.

July

“Let’s go out tonight together.” He said one morning. “Just the two of us.”

Not having spent much alone time together as you would have liked, you quickly agreed. Mat didn’t tell you where he planned on taking you but he must have told Liana because she chose an outfit for you. It gave you a small idea of what he might have been planning.

She didn’t pick out a fancy dress which told you that he wasn’t bringing you to a high end restaurant which you were secretly pleased about because you never quite felt like you fit in at places like those. You much more preferred to go to a small diner so when she chose a cute romper with a pair of sandals, you had a bit of an idea of where you might be going.

“Any hints?” You asked, placing a hand over his which was resting on your thigh.

He shook his head and grinned. “It’s a surprise.”

You pretended to be bothered by it but you felt giddy inside that he was putting so much thought in to your date. It was also fun playing a guessing game, throwing ideas at him of where he was taking you even though you knew he wasn’t going to tell you. You had carefully watched his reactions to your guesses so you weren’t overly surprised when your ride ended at a park.

It was pretty late in the evening, getting close to dark so there were very few people out and around. He parked his car and reached in the backseat to grab a bag before climbing out of the car.

You knew he liked opening the door for you so you waited until he opened it before getting out as well. He took your hand and lead you to a park of the park that was empty and then dropped the bag on the ground and dug around, pulling an old blanket out.

“Picnic?” You asked, grinning from ear to ear.

“Is it okay?” He asked and you sat down when he spread the blanket out.

“It’s perfect.” You told him, watching as his face lit up. He sat down next to you and started pulling different snacks out of his bag, handing you some of your favorites.

“Mom helped pack the lunch.” He paused. “I had to stop her when she tried to cook a three course meal for us.”

You couldn’t help but laugh because it was a very Nadia thing to do.

“I love your mom.” You said. “I love your entire family.”

He smiled, looking at the ground as if he was concentrating on something. You knew the look enough that it meant he was going to say something but was either nervous and was working himself up to saying it or would decide not to say it at all.

But you wanted to know what he was thinking so you nudged him.

“What’s going on in your head?”

His cheeks were red when he lifted his head and he shrugged, smiling.

“I love you.”

Your smile was as bright as one of the stars and he met you halfway when you leaned towards him.

“I love you too.”

August

August was one of your least favourite months because it meant that summer was coming to an end. It also meant that off season was coming to an end and it meant that you and Mat would soon be heading back to New York. You loved it there, you really did. You missed your friends and your job but you knew you would miss B.C even more so when the day came that the two of you had to leave, you weren’t ashamed of the tears that were shed. Nadia made you promise to visit again soon and it was an easy promise to keep.

As soon as you got home, Mat was right back at training for the new season. It was a big change from spending basically every single day together to having to share him again with hockey. You loved Mat and you loved that he did what he loved but sometimes you did wish he had a normal nine to five job. He knew you felt that way some days and you could tell he sometimes felt a little bad about it but what you came to learn throughout your relationship with Mat, was that hockey nearly always came first. It was something that you struggled a lot with in the beginning of your relationship but it got a little easier as time went on.

On your best days, you would watch Mat train and feel pride in how determined and hard working he was.

On your worst days, you laid in bed at night and tried to think of your first kiss with the snow falling softly around you, warm sunny days at the lake and late nights under the stars.

Sometimes it was enough but sometimes, it wasn’t.

September

Wake Me Up When September Ends is the most played song on your playlist for an entire month.

October

You never know the biggest fight of your life is coming until it happens. It’s something that starts as the smallest of things until suddenly it hits you like a freight train and the impact is devastating.

That’s what the biggest fight of yours and Mat’s relationship was like.

You hated shouting and screaming. You hated threats to give everything up and walk away. You hated how easy it felt to do just that.

But what you hated most of all, was feeling like you were never enough. Like no Mater how hard you tried, failure was bound to happen and there was no way you could stop it.

And that was exactly what happened.

Slamming doors was your thing. It was childish and immature but it was a way of you making a point when you were angry about something so when Mat slammed a door, you knew he was past anger.

Mat rarely got angry with you. It could be counted on one hand the amount of times he even raised his voice at you but that night, the two of you yelled at each other until your voices were hoarse.

“Why can’t you understand where I’m coming from?” You snapped, watching him pace back and fourth across the living room. His hair was a mess, he had been running his hands through it and tugging enough that you thought he would tear it out.

“Because it makes no sense!” He yelled, “you knew what you signed up for when we started dating! I can’t be your typical nine to five boyfriend who comes home every night.”

“I’m not asking you to be that! I’m asking you to try and put more effort in to this relationship!” You shouted, not caring about the noise complaints you received from your neighbors a week later. “Do you know what it feels like when you feel that you’re the only one putting any effort in? What it feels like when you look at your friends relationships only to realize that yours isn’t even close to how good theirs is?”

“So you’re calling me a terrible boyfriend.” He said dryly.

“That’s not what I said and you know it. Stop putting words in my mouth, Mat.”

“I’m not putting words in your mouth if that’s what you’re saying. If you’re so unhappy, then why are you still with me, huh?”

His words stopped what you planned to say and you stared at him in shock. A small part of you wondered what the answer to his question was. Were you really that unhappy that you considered leaving?

“I…” you began but trailed off as you watched any emotion leave his face. The hurt and even anger disappeared and you didn’t realize how quiet the room was until he shook his head.

“I’ll make it easier for you.” He said, grabbing his coat and keys. “I’m done.”

You felt like you were frozen in place as you watched him leave, slamming the door behind him. Minutes passed before you slowly walked towards the front door, opening it in hopes that maybe just maybe he was standing on the other side but when you opened it, the hallway was empty. It was dead silent and when you looked at the floor, you saw Mat’s key to your apartment laying there, the little heart and smiley face you had drawn on it staring up at you as if it was mocking you.

You knelt down to pick it up and suddenly it felt like you couldn't breathe, like all the air was pulled from your lungs and your heart was cracking open.

If meeting Mat felt like breathing for the first time, then losing him felt like drowning.

November

You thought that heartbreak was something that passed eventually, that it got easier every day but it was a lie. You didn’t get over Mat quickly, in fact, it felt like every day got harder and you always told yourself you wouldn’t be that girl. The girl who gets her heart broken and can’t get over him. You wouldn’t cry yourself to sleep some nights or be afraid to turn the TV on in case it was the sports channel and you saw his face.

You scrubbed your apartment clean of him, everything he gave you and anything that reminded you of him sat in boxes on the top shelf of the spare bedroom. It didn’t help though because the memories, those were impossible to forget. They were engraved in your brain forever.

You hated him for how easily he left, how easy it was for him to walk out of your life as if he was never here.

Tito texted you a few time in the beginning, first asking what happened and then asking if you were okay or if you needed anything. You guessed he got the message when you didn’t answer because you haven’t heard from him in weeks and you weren’t sure if that made you relieved, or sad.

Falling in love was easy you realized.

Falling out of love was impossible.

December

A year passes swiftly. Especially when it’s both the best and worst year of your life. You hated yourself for it, but when December hits, you wondered how Mat was. You wondered if he got over you quickly or if he struggled the same way you did. You suspect it was the former.

At the end of every year, you liked to go through your things and donate what you don’t need or want. You started with your clothes and as you went through it, you noticed that you were missing several of your favourite outfits and your heart sank when you realized they were at Mat’s.

It left you with a dilemma. Leave them, or be a big girl and go ask for them back. You could go through Tito to get them back but you don’t know if he’s upset with you for ignoring him just because you broke up with Mat. He was your friend and it was unfair what you did but at the time, you were hurting.

But still, you decided to do it yourself and go get the clothes from Mat’s apartment and whatever else you might have left there. You did your best to get ready and look presentable and when you felt ready, you grabbed your keys and headed for the door. When you opened it, a hand nearly collided with your face as the person standing there was starting to knock. They jumped back and when you looked up, you found yourself staring in to the eyes of the exact person you were going to see.

“Mat.” You whispered, feeling like you needed to reach out and touch his face to make sure he was actually standing there and you weren’t hallucinating. But you didn’t because that would just make you look insane.

“Hi.” He said quietly and the two of you stood there for an unknown amount of time staring at each other.

Eventually, you found your voice.

“What are you doing here?” You asked, not harshly but confused.

He opened his mouth to say something but it was if he couldn’t get the words out. Like they were stuck in his throat.

“I’m sorry.” He finally said and you looked at him in shock.

“What?”

He scratched the back of his head and looked at the floor. “What I said to you… it was unfair. I know I fucked up, and I don’t deserve a second chance but these past two months, I missed you like Hell.”

You were lost for words. You couldn’t lie and say you didn’t miss him too but were you really willing to put your heart on the line again and it got broken so easily last time? Could you even handle another heartbreak like that?

“Can we… can you give me a second chance?” He asked so timidly and quietly that you barely heard him.

You let yourself think back over the past year, remembering every single detail. All the joy, laughter, love and heartbreak. Was it worth it? Risking everything again even though you could end up broken again?

You found yourself looking at Mat again, hazel eyes warm and hopeful and it makes you think of the very first time you met. You were faced with the same decision - to let him in or let him go?

You knew you could live without him but you realized standing there, thinking about the past and what the future could be - you didn’t want to live without him.

So you stood up on the tips of your toes and pulled his lips down to meet yours and it felt like you were whole again.

“I can.”

(a couple years down the road, you’ll be saying I do in front of your friends and family with the love of your life and you’ll realize that yes, the risk was worth it.)

#mathew barzal imagine #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal imagines #mat barzal fanfiction #nhl imagines #nhl imagine #hockey imagines #hockey imagine

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oh-sweet-mama · 3 years

Text

Leaving my side Pt.2 (Ben solo at the end)

T.W:Sex, talk of death, slight angst

TROS spoilers

3rd person

Awaking with a soft sound of an alarm ringing through the room, y/n stretched, only to be pulled into a warm embrace.

"Don't leave." Kylo mumbled against her neck.

"I have to go on your scouting mission." She retorted.

"Mhmm 5 more minuets. That girl can wait." Kylo mumbled back.

Y/n reached out and set the timer for 5 minutes. Sighing in content Kylo rests his head on her chest. Listening to her breathing and soft thud of her heartbeat.

Y/n played with Kylo's soft raven hair. It was fluffy in the morning and silky. Kylo's nimble fingers lazily danced along the smooth skin of y/n lower stomach.

The alarm went off in a blink of an eye.

"Don't go." Kylo mumbled. "I have the day off!"

"Well- you wanted me out there finding your girl." Y/n stated.

"Wha- you're my girl." Kylo mumbled sleepily.

"Sure Ren, I'll be back shortly, enjoy your day off." Y/n kissed Kylo's forehead before walking into the bathroom and starting her shower.

Her stomach twisted. There was something wrong.

Listen here child-

Y/n's heart beat quickened.

Your boy will die at the end of this day- so will that girl- and it will be your fault.

She shook the voice out of her ears. Quickly getting dressed and rushed to the door. Before exiting the shared room y/n looked over at Kylo. Fearing this is the last time she will see him.

She knows this is true deep down, but she decided to not accept the fact. She boarded the tie fighters and set out following the coordinates.

Kylo awoke feeling nauseous. He got up and got ready for the day.

Walking up the bridge of his command ship he announced his brief speech.

"I'm going on a mission, tell me at once when Y/n gets back with the girl at once." Kylo's voices modulator boomed.

Boarding his tie fighter Kylo set out for a planet, hoping to find a way finder he'd been looking for far to long.

——— (skip to the battle of exogol)

Kylo's heart races he never heard from his command ship weather or not y/n got back. Fighting off the knights of Ren. Rey appears.

Nodding in reassurance, Rey passed Luke's lightsaber to him. A new fire burned in Ben. Eradicating Kylo. He sprints to the throne room.

A force brings him to his knees. His life force being ripped out of him. Evil cackles fill the room as palpatine rises.

Ben motionless on the cold stone. His breathing was shallow.

Rise Kylo you've got this I love you.

Y/n's voice rings in his ear. Getting up onto his feet he swings his saber only to be flung back.

——

A orange x wing swings in knowing an exactly where to hit the star destroyers.

Her gut churred. Kylo? Ben?

She reached her mind out.

Rise Kylo you've got this I love you.

She sensed Rey.

"Shit!" Y/n slammed her fist down on her dash board. "Fuck!"

Her heart was shattering. Knowing Kylo had found the girl. She punched her X-wing in to advanced war mode. Taking out yet another star destroyer alone.

The rest of the X-wing fleet watched in awe as the rouge plane took down star destroyers.

"Some one radio that X- Wing!" Poe demanded.

Y/n opened her radio to all channels.

"Listen. Resistance. First order. Rebels. I don't give a fuck. I will take every singe one of these star destroyers down. One. By. One." ———-

Ben cradled Rey. She lay motionless.

Ben slowly passed his dwindling life force to her.

"Ben?" Rey whispered.

"Yea- yea it's me."

Rey cupped Ben's cheek and leaned into to gently kiss him.

"Shit shit shit-" y/n muttered. Time seemed to slow. Her X- Wing was out of fuel. She had to land. Y/n felt the connect between Ben and Rey complete "Goodbye Ben."

She took the landing to hot.

Ben felt the gaping hole in his chest. Tears poured.

"No!"

"Ben? Ben what's wrong?" Rey asked.

"Nothing- nothing- I've got to get you home." Ben felt lightheaded, before letting go he falls back as the world fades out. Rey catching his head.

Ben- my son- rise. Your fight is not over yet.

The noise is the cave was silent. Rey watched in anticipation.

Ben took a breath. Opening his eyes. His face was colorless. Rey stood Bens' arm over her shoulder. Most of his weight on her. Limping back to Reys X-wing Ben settles Rey on his lap, taking off glancing over for one last look at the dying planet before jumping into hyper space.

Rolling onto her back, y/n watched as the last X-wing jumped into hyperspace.

"Ben?" Y/n whispered. She felt his pull slowly fade away. She couldn't feel her legs. Where are my legs? Limbs felt like they were cemented to the rough planet.

"Hey! Kid!" A figure loomed over her. "Y/n! Kid! What happened?"

"Perit? My- my X-wing..." the world was getting darker, and the surrounding world started to fade.

"Shit- kid! Let's go." perit gently picked the frail girl up and set her down on a cot back on the ship. "Damn kid we need to stop the bleeding on this leg."

———

"Alright master Ben, here are your personal quarters, meal time is anonymous and you may join when you wish." The small aid instructed.

"Thank you." Ben said softly.

"No problem master Ben, have a wonderful evening." The aid Instructed.

He sat on his bed after he heard the aid leave and her boots recede down the hall. That's when he let it all go.

Sobs bounced off of the walls. Bens entire being trembled with pain.

"Y/n... please-" Ben sobbed. He curled up into his pillow, on top of the covers and let the tears flow. "You- can't leave me here alone." —— Ben spent days in his quarters alone. Often crying silently. Only wandering the halls late at night to find small packaged snacks.

"Shit- ow-" y/n grumbled rubbing the back of her head. "Wha- where am I?"

"You're back at the resistance base kid- ya' did it kid- that wars' over." Perit congratulates.

"You got me back here?"

"Yea- I uh saw your X- wing go down- so I went down to scoop you up- I'm sorry about the X- Wing kid- I got your droid out fine though. An your-"

"Shit my leg!" Y/n panicked.

"You're fine kid I made you a prosthetic. Just try to wear shorts or baggy clothing I'll make you a better one promise." Perit soothed.

"Yea- we can rebuild the X-wing too, I've had my eyes on an old one from the first war for a while." Y/n chewed her lip. "Want to go back to base? I need to speak to a few people, how long was I out?"

"About a good 4 weeks, I feed you and got an Iv in but that's about it. I'll stick around here and fix up your leg some more."

"I- wow. Thank you Perit." Y/n slowly rose to her feet, regaining her bearings. She slowly waded out of the ship, often stopping and leaning on a nearby tree. Y/n had rightened her posture, slowly making it through a small crowd of people.

Ben followed Poe, Rey, and Finn. Quietly observing. Feeling lingering stares. His mother had left them a small 'scavenger hunt' to help them meet some of the important places and people around the base.

"The girl you're looking for stays at a ship outside the boundaries of the base. I haven't seen or hear of her since the battle of exogol." Demi explained.

"Shit- fuck!" Y/n stumbled around her leg getting caught on random items on the ground. "Hey! Lore!"

"Oh my stars you're ok!" Another blonde girl embraced her.

"Oh- there she is- her is name is y/n," Ben's stomach dropped. Y/n? "you should follow her back to her ship- she doesn't look to good. Make sure Perits' around."

"Thank you Demi." Poe thanked. "Damn Leia really has us following a drunk girl back to a ship."

Ben noticed her leg. It seemed to be a piece of hollow metal with very basic joints, connected to the base of her knee.

After collecting supplies, y/n had better bearings. Now walking straight and seeing clearly. However her force connection was still off, unable to sense the party of people following.

"I'm back Perit-"

"Hey uh- y/n-" Poe reaches out.

"Yea? Fuck! I don't have anything for you!" Y/n turned around to be faced with Poe's confused one. Her features dropped. "Sorry for my tone Admiral. I- I thought someone else was following me."

Y/n bowed at the waist.

She turned around, but tripped on a spare part. Dropping all of the supplies she had bundled under her jacket.

"S-sorry- I'll go get the letter." She stumbled away. Picking up loose supplies.

Ben watched in awe as his nimble lover walked away, she seemed to be raised from the dead.

She dug through a small basket of journals. Drawings falling out occasionally. Y/n retrieved the lose artwork.

Beep boop trill?

"Yes the letter I'm looking for the letter from Admiral Leia." Y/n explained to her droid.

The droid opened the panel on the belly then a formally wrapped letter popped out.

"Here sorry for the delay." Y/n apologized "I'm Y/n y/m/n Kenobi, I assisted Admiral Leia, I am not at your service, however I was formally asked to assist master Ben."

Ben's heart skipped beats when his named rolled off of her tongue like honey.

"You! You're the one that is messing with me and Bens' bond!" Rey stormed up to y/n.

"What do you mean?"

"Don't act stupid! You know!"

"Rey sit!" Ben demands.

"I didn't do anything. 3 years ago, admiral Leia sent me on a spy mission straight into the lions den. The first order. I knew she wanted me to bring her son back, but that was never an order. When I first came into contact with Kylo Ren I felt a pull to him. The force wanted me and Ben together. Not Ben and Rey. However I would never get Ben back to The light if I told him this. The force bonds began to connect us. I sensed Reys power of a palpatine." Y/n paused, rubbing her palms together.

Poe, and Finn leaned into Y/n intrigued in her story.

Y/n continued, "I forced a connection between Rey and Ben. To get Ben back. I sacrificed my life for this. I wasn't even supposed to make it off of exogol. Leia knew that Rey was just a scavenger with a complicated past. I was once a scavenger too, on planet of Tatoonie. I'm sorry. I was think about the fate of the galaxy. Not feelings. If I wouldn't have eradicated Kylo Ren, the entire galaxy would be gone."

It was silent. Quiet. Even the droids were holding their breath.

"Oh Y/n" Ben rose to his feet walking over to her. And wrapping his arms around her, "I- I thought I lost you. I felt you go down- I felt the X- wing go down. I felt the bond too, but I didn't know if it was just me falling for you. Which I did anyways."

Light airy chuckles escaped Ben.

"Ben. Ben not here. We must get you back to base. Quickly before the creatures roam their native land." Y/n quickly taking Bens hand and a flashlight. Her prosthetic was uneven from the other real leg. Causing her to have a limp.

——

After wishing goodnight to Poe and Finn. Ben felt Rey's lingering stare. She had fallen for him. But Ben is confused and hurt. He needed someone he could trust.

Y/n had controlled the information passed between the force bond.

Ben punched in his code gently pulling Y/n into his quarters.

"I- I thought I lost you." Ben repeated.

"I know, I know." Y/n soothed. Ben sobbed softly before gently pulling Y/n into his lap. Gently caressing the cool metal of her prothetic, it reminded him of when she used to kiss his mask.

"Be careful of my leg I don't want to hurt you."

"You'll never hurt me."

Flipping positions, Ben gently kissed down her neck.

"I better mark you up." Ben growled lowly.

Pulling her shirt off over y/n's head he kissed a faint line of hickeys down her chest. Before unclasping her bra.

Ben attached his mouth to her right nipple while applying pressure to the other one.

"Shit Ben-"

He traveled down.

"Only shorts huh?"

"Oh shut up- I can't wear pants till I get a better prosthetic."

"Mhmm trying to temp me?"

"Hmm no."

Ripping her shorts and panties off in one slide, Ben crawled back up to kiss her lips hungrily. Y/n wrapped her arms gently around his neck pulling him deeper into their kiss.

Though he kissed down her jaw leaving light hickeys.

"I've missed you." He moans lightly against her collar bone.

"So have I Ben-"

Ben makes dark hickeys down her sternum and along the valley of her breasts. As he makes his way to her heat, gentle love bite shook pleasure through Y/n.

"Shit- Ben." Y/n moaned. Truth be told Ben loves her moans, even as Kylo. He's never heard something so sweet and innocent even when he was sinning between her thighs.

Ben continued down her stomach and onto her thighs. Passing her throbbing core.

"Ben please-" Y/n hated to beg, but she needed. The burning desire and passion she's held back so long was finally freed. She was Bens' and Ben was hers'.

Ben finally landed a simple kiss to her clit. Before launching his attack of love. Licking a long stripe up her core she clutches the sheets. Every whimper goes straight to Ben's cock.

His pants getting tighter by the second. Teasing her entrance with his finger he sucks harshly at her clit. Earning her Moans and whimpers of pleasure to bounce off the walls.

Y/n's nimble fingers rake through Ben's hair lightly tugging.

"Ben- please." She lightly tugged him up to her face. The tip of his nose and lips slick with arousal .

"Always so good for me baby girl." The praise goes straight to y/n's awaiting core.

"Please- fuck me Ben."

"As you wish." He slips his pants off followed by his shirt tossing them somewhere in the room. Ben laces his fingers into hers, before slowly pushing into her.

"F-fuck. Shit- princess- always taking this cock so good." Ben moans. The praises wet y/n further.

"Ben!" Y/n moans, feeling complete with his hips flush against hers. "Please go-" Y/n whimpers.

Ben starts a slow maddening rhythm before starting to pound into her. Releasing his grip on her hands, on hand flies to her to the other resting on the head board.

Stars dance in y/n's vision. Before she knew it her high was within reach.

"Ben I'm close." She moans.

"I know princess go ahead I'm almost there." Ben bucks his hips into hers before coating her walls with his seed. Gently pulling out her fishes a new pair of boxers out of his drawer and one of his tunics. Followed by a damp cloth to clean the arousal off of both of them.

After getting cleaned up. Ben hands y/n his tunic, relishing how small she appears in them. He pulls the Boxers up his strong legs, the. Retrieved a fresh warm blanket to wrap themselves in.

Slipped into the bed with the drowsy Y/n.

"Cuddles?"

"Of course princess."

Ben cradled her in his arms the blanket snuggled close to them. Ben felt- happy? His heart was warm, just like her. He was truly happy and in love, for the first time.

#ben solo redemption #ben solo angst #kylo to ben #ahhh the feels #ben solo smut

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rynhaswritersblock · 4 years

Text

tiktok famous (hc) - part four | p.p.

summary: episode four of tiktoks with y/n and peter ayooooo

warnings: cussing. what's new LOL

+ + +

- BACK AGAIN

- these are the imagines that i can pretty much just pump out because the plot line is like already layed out for me

- in conclusion i like writing these lol

- okay SO

THESE ARE ALL THE PEOPLE WHO GAVE IDEAS::: spideybparker starbabez mrose12623 elliedevotee lilcassipuff buckybigbutt

THANK U! <3

^^ if you've changed your username i'm so sorry whenever i get requests i write down the username and it's lowkey difficult to track who is who and if they've changed it ahhhhh

- aight

- lets get into it

- yuhhhhhh get into itttttttttt

- i'm gonna be saying yuh get into it so much in this imagine i apologize in advance

- like it's kinda bad

- oops

- so y'all know those audios that are like the fake calls

- it's like that man's voice he's like "hey whassup shorty your man around?"

- THAT ONE

- so naturally

- y'all know where this is going

- you and pete are just chilling (this is how all of them start. i feel like a broken record. help)

- you're like FUCK IT LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS

- you start recording

hey whassup shorty

- peter goes into FIGHT OR FLIGHT MODE

- he's just playing video games (fortnite aye) but the S E C O N D HE HEARS THAT RANDOM MAN'S VOICE

- fuckin RIPS OFF THE HEADSET

- EYEBROWS FURROWED AS HE LOOKS AT YOU HE'S LIKE

- huh wHAT NOW

- ????!!!!!!!!!!

- you fail at keeping a straight face cause the fucking AUDIO

your man around?

- a wheeze FLIES out of you mouth as peter SHOOTS UP FROM HIS CHAIR

- big "FUCK NO!" energy

- mans practically jumps on top of you

- he's like angry and confused at first but then he sees how hard you're laughing and just gets even more confused

"what was that?"

- his voice is all high cause it does that in tense situations

- puppy face is loud n clear!

- babey

- meanwhile you can't catch your breath for SHIT

- so you show him the video as you continue to literally die

- as soon as he realizes he just melts

- he's like laying on top of you and buries his face in the crook of your neck before bursting out into laughter and holding you tighter

"you can't do that!"

- god me thinking about that happening irl is giving me BUTTERFLIES

- sexc

- okay this one is another fake phone call

- just gonna jump into it it's pretty much the same situation

- in this one you two are over 18 btw

- for ~legal reasons~

- the audio starts playing with the ringtone and peter just glances over

- he's too busy watching b99

- naturally

hey this is dr. alvarez! we received your pregnancy test results

- WHAT

- peter has never jumped so hard in his LIFE

- tv is PAUSED even captain holt has the shocked expression (who am i kidding it's holt his facial expression is as dead as a brick)

- 🅱eter literally yells

"WHAT"

- audio keeps going

is there a time next week you could come in and talk?

"y/n what"

- he runs over to you and you bust out laughing as he looks at your phone and realizes it's a tiktok

- an annoyed smile pulls at his lips and he groans and wraps his arms around you

"you had me there for a second"

- let's just say peter parker had family on his mind a LOT more since then

- wink wink

- k SO

- queso

- haha

- anyways

- y'all know that one sound

pussy so good i could save that shit for later

- welcome to straight tiktok!

- so y'all just chillin on his bed as best friends do

- on ur phones and shit

- and peter parker is a basic bitch so he has the led lights

- which i want SO BAD btw ugh my room would be such a vibe

- update i'm editing this and i just ordered some ayooooo

- anyways they're currently blue so like

- innocent

- chill

- but THEN

- the audio starts playing from peter's phone

pussy so good-

- you gAsp as the lights turn red

- ur like

- holy shit i didn't know parker could do that

- next thing you know peter's hand is on your chin/jaw (just about ur neck OOPS)

- his mouth is practically ON your ear

- you see him holding his arm out in front of you recording and you can't help but laugh

- but DAMN

his jawline is out and everything and he's fucking SMIRKINGGGG as he whispers the lyrics into your ear

- BUTTAFLIESSSSSSSSSSSSS

- big mattia vibes (btw that man is NOT attractive i'm sorry)

- moving on

- i know i've written one of the ones where you kiss your best friend

- but time to turn the tables

- oh how the turn tables

- time for y/n to be a bad bitch cause WE MAKING THE FIRST MOVE!!

- hell yea!

- so it's late right

- like late late

- at least midnight (sleep schedule is MESSED from quarantine though so honestly late rn is like 2 or 3 in the morning yikes)

- and ur hella bored

- on tiktok

- the fuck else do you expect?

- and you start doing the thing where you start thinking about getting up and doing something and you think about it so much that you physically can NOT sit there any longer and must Move or Die

- i KNOW i am not the only one

- so that happens

- and you're like FUCK IT

- so you walk out of your room and into peter's next door

- oh to live at avengers headquarters and live next to peter parker

- you just fucking stroll in

- peter's fat ass just goes "hey thanks for knocking"

- meanwhile you can't even stand to look at him because you're afraid that if you do all of your confidence will VANISH

- so you set up the camera and start recording

- at this point peter's sitting up and just watching you cause he's so confused

- and

- (HERE WE GO)

- it takes everything in you not to RUN OUT

- but you walk over to him

- wrap a hand around his neck

- tilt your head and lean down

- when peter realizes what's going on he's like OH MY GOD

- fight or flight response HITS except its JUST FLIGHT

- HIS BODY CHOSE FLIGHT

- he fucking REELS back

- can't even process that his best friend and crush since EVER just tried to kiss him

- sdfjksdkfjsdfg

- DKJFNHSKDFNSLA

- you're like fuck! so you turn to start r u n n i n g a w a y

- but then his hands wrap around your waist

- you FLY backwards and laugh as the two of you flop into the bed

- and he kisses you

- mwah ha ha haaaaaa

- don't ask why the evil laugh just accept it

- i am tired yes it is only 8:43pm i am still tired

- NEXTTTTTTT

- so y'all know those povs where it's like you find out your soulmate's first words on your bday

- well

- ha

- you and peter are bored because ~ q u a r a n t i n e ~

- chilling at headquarters

- bored in da house and i'm in da house bored

- and peter's like "imma make a pov!"

- okay!

- so i'm just gonna lay it out for you HERE WE GO

- he has the generic countdown thing (text boxes saying 3...2..1! you know the deal) and then he looks at his wrist and it says "hey spider-boy!" and he gets so flustered - next clip it's him running into "you" (obviously you're not actually in it but he does the text box thingy) - you're asking about what it says and try to get a peek but he pulls away - next clip it's right before your bday - and then you find out your quote and it says "it's spider-MAN! cause i'm a man!" - and peter is just looking anxiously/happily at the camera

- PERIOD

- i hope that was a good visual idk i tried

- and uhhhh yeah that one stays in the drafts bc he doesn't wanna expose himself

- moving right along by the way it's raining rn and i'm listening to my kind of woman by mac demarco and UGH this song makes me so...... jkdfhsdk

- OKAY THIS IS ANOTHER STRAIGHT TIKTOK ONE

- but it's cute so

- fuck it

- y'all know it

i wanna put you in seven positions for seventy minutes babe

- mischievous as ✨hell✨

- oh my god i got another idea okay i'm writing that after this one

- anyways!

- you and peter are chilling

- note: i yell at myself every time i write that because the AMOUNT OF THESE THAT START THIS WAY GOD

- he's watching netflix or something idk

- fyi outer banks is overrated sorry not sorry

- yell at me if u want but

- it's riverdale for vsco girls

- you set up the camera and start recording

- audio starts playing and you climb into his lap and he's like WOAH

- you like put your hands on his cheeks/jaws lol and you start mouthing the lyrics

- but the THING IS (pt 1)

- homeboy catches on pretty quick

- and

- fuck

- he starts MOUTHING THE LYRICS BACK

- you deadass have to take a second and reel back to catch your breathe

- but the THING IS (pt 2)

- HE'S GOTTEN ALL INTO IT

- SO HE PULLS YOU BACK IN

- UR FUCKIN FOREHEADS ARE TOUCHING AND YOU BOTH JUST START REALLY AGGRESSIVELY MOUTHING THE LYRICS

- kinda hot doe

- something for u to think about at night

- hey bitch this is a reminder to write about the fairy comments

- thanks past me

- SO

- hmm lemme think

- okay

- so

- okay yes

- so peter-man posts a tiktok of him doing flips n stuff

- like very generic white boy look at me doing things

- and it's very impressive

- but

- you decide to just GO AT IT IN THE COMMENTS

- LIKE TOTALLY ANNIHILATE HIM

- i'm just gonna write some examples

- fuck me for writing this on a computer finding all these emojis on here is very difficult

- oh well

- here we go:

- oh my god a squirrel just climbed up the tree in my front yard and it caught me so off guard my heart skipped a beat

- wait okay irrelevant

- for real this time here we go:

you ate that 💕🧚‍♀️⚡🌟next time make it me instead 💖🧚‍♀️✨ omg peter you came on my fyp 🧚‍♀️💖✨but make it on me next 🧚‍♀️💕✨🦋 a necklace 💕✨🧚‍♀️⚡but make it your hands ✨💖🦋😌

- and so on

- lets just say when peter saw those

- his face got SO RED

- TOOK HIM AT LEAST TEN MINUTES TO COMPOSE HIMSELF

- AND THEN HE RAN INTO YOUR ROOM

"y/n what is this"

"uh fairy comments"

"but they're so-"

- you just stare at him and like

- shrug

- but knowingly

- HAHA OKAY NEXT ONE

- okay i took a break to go sit in the rain and eat hawaiian rolls 10/10 experience def go do that next time it rains

- i think i wrote one like this but with the supalonely dance

- so this time

- we doing the savage dance

- first of all that song is a BANGER

- second, the dance is SO FUN

- so it's the same thing as last time

- you set up the camera but have it face peter instead of u sneaky sneaky

- and then u start doing the dance of course

- and obv peter is like yuhhhhhhhhh get into itttttttttt

- clapping along and smiling and whooping

- supportive bby

- but THEN

- YOU THROW IT BACK

- HOMEBOY DIDN'T EVEN SEE IT COMING

- HALF OF HIM IS LIKE OH FUCK I SHOULD'VE STOPPED HER

- OTHER HALF IS SAYING holy shit !

- once you finish you look at peter and he's just like 👁👄👁

- lol

- anyways

- you watch that video MULTIPLE TIMES afterwards

- okay in this one you and pete are 18+ because

- we like being legal 😌✋

- but it's one of those where you walk out in front of your boyfriend naked

- so peter just got home from patrol and climbs in through the window of y'alls shared apartment

- oh to live in an nyc apartment with peter parker UGH

"y/n? i'm home babe"

- the camera is shaking because you're laughing so hard and kinda nervy

- but you walk out of y'alls room and peter just turns to you

- nearly drops his fucking mask

- he's shocked for a second before he gets such a big smile on his face and throws you over his shoulder

- hehe

- okay last one i love this one sm this tiktok came up on my fyp and i immediately though THIS IS Y/N AND PETER

here it be::

https://www.tiktok.com/@wizqueifa_/video/6826567570116611333

god i hope that works and y'all can watch it lmk if u can't like if the link doesn't work or anything

- okay basically it's that tiktok but u and peter

- like that video EXACTLY everything about it is perfect

- that's it lol

- and i recommend watching her other tiktoks with her boyfriend bc their relationship is adorable and it's totally y/n and peter

- okay i think (hope to god) i've written all the ones that y'all requested

- i think i might only do just one more part of these???? idk i feel like if i just keep going on with them (cause obv trends keep coming) half this book would just be the tiktoks lol

- ANYWAYS

- peace out homies i love each and every one of you

- be kind to urself and try to be productive

- i'm gonna go try and write some more so

- yes

- MWAH <3

+ + +

hi i hope you guys are doing well

ily

#peter parker #tom holland #peter parker imagines #marvel #mcu #spiderman #peter parker x reader #spiderman x reader #fanfic #fluff #writing #peter #parker #thomas holland

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