#we're calling it

[moshieee]

hElppp

I was playing a gartic phone game with a friend and we ended up accidentally making a new crack ship ?????

#its grimace and Garfield #we're calling it #grimfield #and it works???? #if anyone wants to the art we made just ask #gartic phone #crackship #moshieee tales #old post

[nerdyqueerr]

couple qs!! your latest project 8 & 17

woo ok have i said anything about this project on tumblr yet? no! am i gonna answer these questions as if everyone knows what im talking about? yes!

8. What do they find physically sexiest about each other?

ok so Stella (fortune teller and occasional real prophet, also a human lie detector) obviously cannot resist the buff sword arm charms of Rose (runaway noble pretending to be a fully qualified knight) but i had a really hard time figuring out what Rose finds physically sexiest about Stella. and then i remembered they have a homoerotic haircut scene so i'm going to go ahead and say her hair and you can take that however you want

17. Do they believe in marriage?

At the beginning Rose is probably really into marriage considering her whole schtick is following antiquated rules (partially in order to game the system but also bc she kinda believes in old ideals). By the end of the story they might consider a kind of commitment ceremony bc it's important to celebrate and Show Your Affection Even When It Makes You Vulnerable but i havent really decided what happens to them down the line. doubt they'd get legally married unless utterly necessary

#maybe Marvelle is allowed to officiate weddings #he's the ringleader at stella's circus which is also a secret magical agency #anyways theres a big theme of Showing Your Affection Even When It Makes You Vulnerable in this story #if u hadnt noticed #hm i should write the homoerotic haircut scene #also important to know that they are butch4butch and this is vaguely medieval fantasy but also theres circuses dw about it #imagine this a girl who lies to everyone including herself meets a magical human lie detector #and then they are gay about it #thats the story #theres some cool sword stuff too probably and like lots of prophecies #stella's prophecies are broken atm but its totally fine and not at all worrying #i also have an actual worldbuilding map for this project #its the most ambitious ive been in a while #it also has no name #we're calling it #butch4butch medieval fantasy adventure #but thats too damn long so lets go with #stella and rose #oh wait #the star and the rose #what a corny name. oh well i'm stuck now #my shit

[ot3]

“there are plenty of fish in the sea” = there are more people out there who you could get with

“sleeping with someone” = having sex with them

“sleeping with the fishes” = got murdered

my proposal: “there are plenty of other fish to sleep with” = next person you fuck will kill you

#we're working on a sex = death = fish cosmology here. #thats why they call orgasms 'the petit mort'. #because of the fish connection.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so how about that update, huh

#this is all i have to offer rn </3 #im working on Actual Art but for now all you guys get is Half Assed Meme #eddie dear. eddie. eddie dear. Eddie Dear. EDDIE DEAR- #oh man. oh boy. oh fuck. its so over (we're so back) #scribble salad #welcome home #welcome home puppet show #eddie dear #i feel like i just walked into a disaster recovery group a week late w/ a smoothie #heely-ing in here Whats Up Fuckers #ok that was a creepy glitch #for a second every button i pressed created a new tag that said #'Who Else Is Traumatized!!!' #a little unnerving and Very on brand! one could call it WHcore... or somethn...

[thatmightyheart]

recently watched this fresh hot new anime called fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood for the first time and i absolutely loved it! also these two made me deeply unwell (positive)

#fullmetal alchemist brotherhood #fmab #riza hawkeye #roy mustang #royai #fullmetal alchemist #fma #i already knew i would like roy. like come on. my black-haired anime man senses were alight #but riza............. WOW #riza: [screaming crying ripping her heart out over the colonel] #riza: [tokyo drifting with her hair down+glasses disguise] #riza: [whole ''when we're alone the colonel calls me riza'' stunt] #me: [twirling my hair giggling] WOW... wow.. wowoo😍 hi... 😍 #i've started the manga and it's already even more of a riot. the bonus pages take me out LOL

[canisalbus]

Everyone talks about the angst of ye olden times vaschete and the coffee shop AU but i love the little puppy versions of them you draw sometimes. The baked potato and crinkled tissue are so cute!

The Adventures of Baked Potato and Crinkled Tissue

#you're my friend now we're having soft tacos later #own art #own characters #CanisAlbus #Vasco #Machete #cawsket #Angst of Ye Olden Times is what I'll be calling the canon from now on

[nientedal]

What progress at home has biden enacted? What policies of his show that he is making progress that prove he is actually different than trump?

I like to pretend I have faith in humanity, so I'll answer as if you're asking this in good faith.

Biden's DEA has lifted restrictions on telehealth prescriptions to make appointments and assistance more accessible.

He put a funding package into place to help unhoused people get access to mental and physical healthcare, as well as short-term and long-term housing.

He has attempted and is still attempting to get student debt relief through - this was blocked by Republican judges appointed by Trump, but he's still working on it.

Infrastructure repair - his administration has budgeted funds to actually fix some severely-damaged and frequently-traveled bridges.

Trying to expand access to healthcare to include undocumented immigrants who came to the USA as children (Dreamers) under the Affordable Care Act. Support for Navigator programs and outreach has also been increased.

He has vetoed Republican-led bills that were attempting to overturn environmental protections - one that would have forbidden investment fund managers to consider climate change in their portfolios (I have two degrees in accounting and this is actually huge), and another that would have overturned restrictions on agricultural runoff into our waterways.

He and his administration worked for ages to get rail workers paid sick days.

This is just some of what he's been doing. Meanwhile, Trump and other Republicans want to criminalize the lives of LGBT people like you and me. They want to eliminate no-fault divorce and force births that will kill parents or devastate them financially. They have stated flat out that they want to install a military dictatorship in the USA. They attempted to put that in motion on January 6th, 2021. They failed once. They will do better next time.

One party wants to house the homeless and expand social safety nets, while the other one wants to criminalize homelessness. One of them wants a future in which I might be able to vote to change how much of a war machine my country is, while the other one wants to eliminate my ability to vote entirely. Those are not the same. Those literally are opposites.

At the end of the day, all you and I can do is choose to do the least amount of harm possible. You and I cannot choose to do no harm. This is the USA, we sell war, you and I cannot choose to do no harm. I wish we could, my god do I wish we could, but that is not an option. So we grieve for the harm we couldn't eliminate and work to minimize the harm that is done. Despite all the crap they support, Democrats are the minimum amount of harm right now. Acting like they aren't is exactly what brought us to an election where our options are a future where we are either wading in blood or drowning in it.

Not voting for Biden will not help Palestine. Not voting for Biden will guarantee a Republican president who will make the situation in Palestine WORSE. AND it'll hurt a lot of other places as well, both at home and abroad, because Republicans are about business and the USA is in the business of war! And I would very much like that to change someday! I would very much like to someday be able to choose to do no harm! And I know what I have to do to try for that future, so what are YOU going to do? There is no standing off to the side in this. If you aren't helping pull, you're the dead weight we're pulling. Are you going to dig your feet into the mud and blood and drown us there? Or are you going to get the fuck off your ass, grit your teeth, and help us pull free?

#askbasket #iam-the-wild #us politics #israel #palestine #if you do not vote blue you do not get to call yourself an antifascist #i HATE that that's the case; don't mistake me #but that is the reality we're working with #there isn't any other #do nothing and kill five people or act and kill one. #so what are you gonna do? i can't choose for you. but i know what my choice is. #i'm part of this world. and as much as i hate it...turning away is not one of the options. #we fight on ALL fronts #we protest we donate we write we call #AND WE ALSO FUCKING VOTE FOR THE LEAST OF THE EVILS. BECAUSE NO EVIL IS NOT AN OPTION.

[iravaid]

Mumma's boy

#simon riley #ghost mw2 #call of duty #modern warfare 2 #ghost comics #oh mitski class of 2013... we're really in it now #my art #digital art #iraart #codposting

[starcurtain]

One of my favorite things about the game's writing of Alhaitham and Kaveh:

The basic game text goes out of its way to convince us that the house is Alhaitham's--it is literally called "Alhaitham's Home" even during Kaveh's hangout.

But in-universe, we never see Alhaitham in his house unless Kaveh is there.

Throughout Sumeru's archon quests, we run into Alhaitham practically everywhere: in Port Ormos, in Aaru Village, in the Akademiya, at the Grand Bazaar. But never, despite the fact that the story wants to sell him as a homebody, in his own home. In fact, the only references we have to Alhaitham's house at all throughout the entire lead up of the archon quests are mentions of Kaveh.

Alhaitham doesn't suggest going there, doesn't ever go home himself (at least that we're explicitly told about) until the end of the archon quests, and has no cutscenes in his own house until Kaveh returns from the desert.

Then, all the sudden, Alhaitham literally can't wait to go home and walks off in the middle of a conversation.

From that point on, every time we're permitted to enter Alhaitham's house, in story quests, the hangout, and the event, it's either when he and Kaveh are together or with Kaveh alone.

Even during Alhaitham's birthday skit of all things, they went out of their way to tell us that Alhaitham's home, so of course Kaveh is there:

The map tag tells us the building is Alhaitham's Home, but the story reinforces a different idea:

It's Alhaitham's home when Kaveh is in it.

#genshin impact #haikaveh #kavetham #kaveh #alhaitham #the game really said #we're going to give you an area called Alhaitham's home #but he's never going to be there #except when his roommate is there #so whose house is it really #we have private conversations with Kaveh there #but not Alhaitham lmaooo #I'm not saying Kaveh is 9/10ths of Alhaitham's impulse control #but Kaveh left and Alhaitham said fuck it #I live in the back allies of Port Ormos now #the streets chose me!!

[egophiliac]

another one that I'm not super happy with, but continuing to mess with it isn't going to help! so here he is! 🦇 there was a lot I was trying to get across in this one, so uhhhhh hopefully it reads.

we're almost out of unique magics now...just Ace (and maybe Grim?) left!

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #unique magic posters #drawing lilia slightly more on-model than i usually do feels so wrong #i just want to draw the tallest spikes #lilia: (writing down his height) 5'6“...5'2” in a hat #(actually i'm pretty sure he would just write 'fun-size' but i digress) #anyway lilia. hey lilia. your magic is not cradle-specific so WHY is it called that #did it come in like 'so in like 500-ish years we're going to have a significant moment with a cradle. just trust me bro.' #'in the meantime enjoy having the weirdest magic name ever' #probably came in useful for raising kids though #don't put that in your mouth don't you know where it's BEEN #because i do #(long stare off into middle distance) i know where it's been

[beyondthisdarkhouse]

When I started choosing embroidery patterns for my store, I was really focused on relatively small, simple designs. Things that would be quick and easy for beginners. But honestly... I think I underestimated just how easy the printed interfacing would be, since it's the needlework version of completing a dot-to-dot patterns. They take time, but none of the constant counting and ripping stitches out.

So that meant I've started to get ambitious. Little designs are still great, but what about a few designs that are dazzling from the other side of the room? As a treat?

Maybe just one of Giovanni Ostaus's shirt opening border designs from 1561?

Some fancy chickens and um... tulips? pomegranates? water fountains?

And just for me, a pattern you won't find in any history book, a little confection I made that I like to call: "Strawberry Fieldmice Forever"

That's only like, half of them. I just dumped a whole bunch onto my Etsy.

Interested?

Beginner-friendly historical and fantasy embroidery patterns, right this way!

#haberdashery #crass commercialism #I'm even having a Month of Darkness sale! #yes that's right we're giving up the pretense of Black Friday and calling November what it is.

[blushweddinggowns]

Idea expanded, Rockstar Eddie falling head over heels for Bartender Steve working in a high class club type of joint. He sees him working one night and thinks God damn, he's hot. I'm taking him home tonight.

Except bartender Steve has developed a significant distaste for celebrities and rich people in general because of getting cut off from his homophobic parents for coming out and the general bad way many have treated him at work whilst sloshed. But lucky for Eddie, Steve doesn't recognize him. And even though he started off in a trailer park, the fame has gone to his head a little and he asks Steve out with the full intention of getting into his pants and never seeing him again.

But oh no, would you look at that Steve isn't easy. And what Eddie thought would be a booty call ends up being a ten hour date around the city where he has more fun than he even thought was possible. Just from talking with Steve about anything and everything, flitting to parks and museums. And Eddie doesn't even realize until he's back at his hotel that they didn't even kiss.

And they go out more and more, and Eddie likes him more and more and he finds out where the rich people hate comes from. And it scares him. So he keeps lying. Like an idiot. And he tells Steve a fake last name, he tells him a fake job (which is only half fake because he did used to be a tattoo artist) and he rents an air bnb that he pretends is his own place. And the lies keep getting more elaborate to cover up more lies. And he keeps refusing to meet Steve's friends out of fear that they'll recognize him. And he really just drove himself into a corner here because he is absolutely in love with Steve at this point but how the fuck can you have a normal relationship when you are pretending to be someone else?

Turns out you can't, and Steve finds out the truth despite his efforts. But the twist is, he thinks it's fucking hilarious. After a normal period of What the fuck reaction time he gets over it. But never let's Eddie live it down.

------------------------------

6/27 Edit: Welp, now there's a fic.

Two fics actually. The other is by KikiZ on ao3 which is great if you're not looking for an explicit fic! Because mine will be. It's also a bit more introspective than what I got going on, and also thus far, hella romantic.

#steddie #steddie ficlet #steddie fic idea #that i am getting too interested in #rockstar eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson #just...ideas #we're just talking #steddie drabble #steddie fic #i just like the twist of avoiding classic angst #i find it very funny #all that work and stress and axiety #just for your boyfriend to call you a dumbass with affection #it...intrigues me #if I did write this I think a one shot basis could work #in theory #just in theory

[lightningstar1389]

Sonic Frontiers DLC art because I think it's been long enough imo

I'm just really excited to see new forms again :> so here's a doodle of the dude™

Trying to slowly upload my backlog of art onto here, so expect a bunch of art the next few days :)

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic frontiers #cyber sonic #super sonic #super sonic cyber #idk what we're calling him?? #i think thats it idk

[hellenhighwater]

Genuinely being a single woman in my thirties, living alone, is such a mixed blessing sometimes. I do love my house and when I'm here I literally never want to leave. But on the other hand, I do get tired of leaving to go hang out with people, even though I love seeing them. Especially because I have such a great group of friends but they live all over the place, geographically, and therefore most of them don't know each other. And I actually really love hosting? But I never have people in my house because logistically it's always more practical for me to go to them than vice versa.

But sometimes I buy new old dishes and wanna just have a little fancy wizard party, but all my guests are far away. Please may I have the teleport spell. Or a high-speed commuter rail system.

#Hazard of moving to a city where i dont have people locally i guess #a very insular city at that #and honestly i am not lonely! I have lovely freinds! But I do miss the college days of everyone basically living in walking distance #in one city #as opposed to now #where DND takes me the width of the state on a weekly basis #usually the only time there are groups of people in my house is around christmas for the family holidays #and like...in the overall balance of my life this works #me going to my people is the logical choice #and its not a bad thing #but most of my friend groups are...local clusters where I am the out-of-towner these days #which again: fine; i knew that going in when I decided to move where I did and overall its the best call #but also sometimes I want to just load up the whole crew in detroit and tell them we're heading to mine this time #dont worry there'll be fancy little finger sammiches when we get there #just give me an excuse to use the wizard plates

[myersesque]

wanna run lines in ur trailer

#hello lgbtq community i've been a casual scott pilgrim enjoyer since like 2016 #here is my first shitty contribution to the fandom. enjoy #og #spto spoilers #scott pilgrim spoilers #scott pilgrim takes off spoilers #scott pilgrim #scott pilgrim takes off #spto #wallace wells #todd ingram #envy adams #wodd #toddace #or. whatever we're calling them #mlm

[konigsblog]

as my favorite könig smut writer you’re the only one i trust to do dbf!neighbor!könig x early 20s!reader with the dirtiest, sloppiest, most toe curling age gap smut 💗💗

dbf!neighbour!könig?! sign me the fuck up, i could write a whole series for that filthy man!

synopsis; your father's best friend, könig, has been struggling to get himself into a stable, loyal relationship lately. luckily for him, you offer him some sort of release.

tw/cw; age gap/difference, early 20s! reader x late forties!könig, weed use, blowjob, mutual masturbation, PinV, tell me if i missed anything. MDNI 18+ 🍃

photo credits; @ave661

You've had the hots for your father's best friend for quite a while.

He doesn't live very far from you at all. In fact, he lives next door and visits your father pretty often to smoke together and talk about whatever is bothering him, which usually includes topics like König's failed relationships and inability to hold a woman for longer than a week.

Aside from wanting to rant about his horrible, fucked-up love life and to smoke weed with your old man, he wants to see you as well—maybe even more than speak with your father.

When your father is busy doing something else, like washing the dishes or cleaning his car outside, König will excuse himself to the bathroom and will sneak into your bedroom to admire the place. You have plans to move out soon, but currently, you stay with your father inside of your childhood home. König's hand "mysteriously" sneaks into your clothing hamper and begins looking for a pair of panties.

It's alright, you won't notice surely...

And you can't deny your attraction to him. The sound of his familiar, accented voice leaves your knees weak and your panties damp and soaked with the thoughts running through your dirty mind at the moment. You smile at König and talk to him about your plans for college, watching as his eyes flicker from your chest to your eyes, your nipples turning into little stiff buds at the cold breeze in the living room.

Today was like any other saturday; your father was away down the road for some beers with his other friends in the afternoon while König had just arrived home from another fucked-up date, ending like the rest of his dates have. He looks dishevelled and in dire need of some sort of release. He's visibly and clearly pent up and exhausted, rolling himself a joint to relax, leaning against his porch and closing his eyes tightly. He's deep in thought and doesn't realise that you've sneaked up on him, practically jumping out of his skin at your sudden presence.

“Shit, Mäusi— I didn’t see you there... What’s wrong, dear?” He smiles forcefully. He doesn't want to bother you with his shitty life since you're probably all worked up from college and stressed out, but you insist that he tells you what's bothering him. It doesn't take a lot of convincing since it's hard to deny you, especially when you say that you can help him if he explains.

He invites you inside and offers you a joint, in which you gratefully accept and seat yourself beside him, ready to act as a therapist for him.

“Another fucked date with another woman who seems interested in me, but actually isn’t. It seems like I can’t please any women.” He admits through gritted teeth. At the sight of his frustration, you place your hand on his thigh teasingly. “Do you think there is anything I can do to help?” You ask quietly with a mischievous and playful smile plastered on your face. Your voice is seductive and sultry, eyes half-lidded and lustful. God, You really are a tease, huh?

“And what are you hinting at, Liebling?”

König always thought he'd be the one to initiate, but right now, he was struggling to keep his composure and quickly found himself falling for your acts of seduction. You lowered yourself onto your knees and began to unzip his jeans, cocking your head to the side at the sight of his aching cock springing out in your face. You giggled while König pulled his large hands into fists, throwing his head back at the wet sensation of your lips wrapped around his swollen, weeping cock. He'd been dreaming of this moment for months, Liebe.

The things you do to König fucked-up head, Good Lord. He couldn't help the sounds of pleasure running through his lips, his dick painful at your tight grip and pleasure.

His sounds came out pained and guttural, pleased but so on edge and anxious of what your father would think about him after being so touchy-feely with his best friend's daughter. He curses himself out for agreeing to this, feeling like such a pervert despite yearning for more of your addictive, sweet touch. “Feel good?” You question him, knowing he'll get frustrated and will force your head down onto his leaking boner. He huffs and puffs, gripping your hair in a tight fist and pushes your head down with a loud moan leaving his mouth, choking on his groans and grunts.

You coat König's lengthy shaft in your spit to get him slick enough, before seating yourself onto his big lap, your hand stroking and fisting his dick. He slides his fingers into your hole with his eyes wide at the sensation and texture of your gummy walls. He chokes on his pleased sounds as you tease his tip by rolling your soft thumb over his uncut, creamy tip and feel as your folds are stuffed with his thick digits. He pumps them into your soaking cunt and admires the sticky mess left between your fingers, curling his fingers deep inside your gummy cunt.

“C’mere, Taube—Kiss me, please.” He grumbles out, getting obsessive with the pleasure you offer him. He places his lips against yours, making out with you messily and sloppy, the effects of the marijuana leaving him relaxed and at ease with all his concerns and worries forgotten about. His tongue rolls over your bottom lip while you squeeze his dick, whimpering into the sweet kiss. König's fingers begin to pump into you even faster, pulling away to beg you to sit on his cock. You're on edge and shaking pathetically, nearing your orgasm but not quite fully there.

“Sit on it, dear. Don’t be so shy, not now you can’t.” The smell of nicotine sticks to his skin, your thighs shaking as you begin to ease down onto his weeping, veiny dick. König doesn't hold back the sounds of his arousal and euphoria as it burns through his large body, bucking his broad and sturdy hips into your body while cursing you out for being such a dirty tease. You leave König totally obsessed after finally receiving some action after so long.

You bounce on his lap while he fucks his bulbous cock deep into your drooling slit. You gasp and roll your eyes to the back of your head at the ache andd pleasure between your thighs, unable to stop letting out the most perverted and pleased noises. You can feel as König hits your cervix with each thrust and his heavy balls slap against your rear as he drives his hips against your tight rear. Your eyes fill with tears at the pain and stretch, his girthy dick leaving you breathless as you admire the state he leaves your pussy in; raw and sensitive.

König can't hold himself back when you begin to lose control. Sweet, pearly droplets of your sweet arousal run down his boner and coat his length, allowing him to fuck you even harder and deeper with ease as he uses your sweet juices as lube.

“That’s it, little one—God, look how well you’re taking’ me, princess. You’re a mess, such an addictive mess, huh? You’re gonna be an obsession of mine, that’s for sure.” König grits his teeth as he bucks his hips into you even harder, his eyes shut tightly as your walls clamp down around him one last time, filled with ropes of his white creaminess. You pant and heave at the stomach bulge caused by his loads and ropes of his hot release. You grip his jaw to make out with him, your body sweaty and hot with König's cheeks flushed a rosy pink.

You have to sneak back home before your father comes back and asks what you were doing over at his best friend's house. König would be slaughtered if he found out the truth.

You just have to act all innocent, as if König's milky and potent load is oozing out of your hole and dampening your panties at the dinner table.

#also i'm honoured to be your favourite könig writer my dear 🥹🥹 #means so much to me (glad we're all depraved for this man...) #könig x you #könig x reader #konig x reader #konig x female reader #konig x reader smut #konig x you #könig #könig call of duty #könig fanfiction #konig call of duty #cod konig #konig mw2 #konig #tw: age difference #tw: age gap #orla speaks