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ordinaryschmuck · 4 years

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What I Thought About “Enchanted Grom Fright”

Salutations random people of the internet who probably won't read this. I am an Ordinary Shmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

When I started doing reviews, I told myself to stay limited to specials, movies, seasons, and even entire T.V. shows. I didn't want to do reviews for regular episodes of a show, mostly because there wouldn't be enough to talk about in a single post. For me, an episode has to either be astounding enough or important enough to warrant a review. And low and behold, The Owl House did just that with the episode "Enchanting Grom Fright." Keep in mind that I am going to be spoiling everything that happens in this episode. So if you somehow haven't seen it yet, I highly recommend that you do so. And if you haven't seen The Owl House yet...what the hell is wrong with you?

With that out of the way, let's get started with-

WHAT I LIKE

Luz independently looking for new glyphs: This scene is excellent for two reasons. Reason number one: It shows how dedicated Luz is to learning magic. So far, we have yet to see Hexide teach Luz anything regarding her unique way of doing magic. This is why it's great to see Luz try to find glyphs on her own so she can at least attempt to catch up with everyone else. There's also the implication that it's not an easy task for her, given the multiple crumpled up pieces of paper, which must have been failed attempts to make the plant glyph. This scene adds continuity from "Adventures of the Elements" as well, proving that Luz had learned her lesson in said episode. As for reason number two for why this scene is excellent: It sets up how Luz and Amity defeat Grom. Luz could have used her other two glyphs to destroy Grom, but doing so would take away some neat symbolism with the tree that was grown (more on that later). Therefore, Luz finding the plant glyph was a great set up with a proper pay off. Which is what I love about The Owl House. It takes things you wouldn't think twice about and actually makes something beautiful. Case in point: A 'Grom Night' poster was shown in a previous episode, hinting to the glory that is this episode.

Luz barely texting her mom back: I like this because it finally addresses Luz's conflictions for lying to her mom (Something I may or may not have toyed around with https://archiveofourown.org/works/23321692/chapters/55864000). These scenes present moments of how Luz isn't always the happy go lucky teen that she is. And I like that because it adds layers to a character who is already engaging enough.

That Gromposal: I made a post of all the things Disney has approved of before approving Lumity. I guess you can add to the list a character presenting an anatomically correctly drawn heart with the word 'Grom' written in what I can only assume is blood!

(Jokes aside, I legitimately like the dark humor in this scene, as well as Skara saying yes to the poor boy. It was adorable, damn it!)

Amity’s hostility swapped with being friendly: Here's a nice bit of character development for ya! It's just a few seconds, but those seconds show how far Amity has come since episode FIVE! Which is why Amity is one of the best characters in the show. Her development is so impressive that it's legitimately jarring to compare the Amity who was angry to see Luz, to the Amity who immediately apologizes, to Luz. But she still has years of conditioning from her parents to deal with, so of course, Amity's first instinct is to bare her fangs. And I'm more than positive that that instinct is going to leave her pretty soon.

Eda: While we're on the topic of great characters, let's take a moment to talk about Eda in this episode, shall we? Eda, throughout "Enchanted Grom Fright," has fully embraced her role as a maternal figure for Luz. The way Eda attempts to warn Luz about the dangers of Grom is a testament to how much Eda truly cares about 'her human.' And it's not like Eda doesn't acknowledge Luz's efforts at survival. She knows Luz can take care of herself, but that won't stop Eda from drawing the line when she knows Luz is in over her head. The best part is that when Luz admits that she was wrong, Eda doesn't respond with anger or even with a smug "I told you so." Instead, Eda's reaction is calm and nurturing. A response that Luz needed at that moment. It's sweet and genuinely heartwarming to see.

(And I love how Eda constantly admires her own beauty throughout the episode. Which is something I'm sure most fans can relate to.)

Luz and Amity’s talk in the forest: There is a lot to love about this exchange, due to how adorable it is. So here's a quick list: The clearly romantic music playing in the background. The way Amity slipped in the mud and was inches away from accidentally kissing Luz when getting pulled up. The fact that Luz sits down into the mud so as not to make Amity feel self-conscious about being filthy. Luz's sweet, sincere, and instant "I would" when responding to Amity wondering who would take her place as Grom Queen. The fact that Amity was surprised that someone would be willing to take her place in the first place. The payoff to Luz learning that she really did have a spider on the back of her head (Alright, that one wasn’t adorable, but it was definitely hilarious!).

Amity “destroying” Hooty: While I do enjoy seeing Amity act all sweet and gushy, I will admit that feisty Amity is still best Amity. Plus, this scene was remarkably funny.

Training Luz for Grom: This scene was a fantastic showcase for each of the Blight siblings. Now, because I've talked a lot about Amity (and will continue to do so), I want to start talking about Edric and Emira first. When first introduced to Ed and Em, my initial reaction was that they were meanspirited versions of the Weasley Twins from Harry Potter. Sure, Fred and George are known to cause mischief, but they do realize that there's a line you don't cross when it comes to family. That is something that Ed and Em ignored during their debut episode, where they tried to reveal Amity's diary to the world. Luckily, the writers picked up on this quick and made a subtle detour in terms of Ed and Em's personalities. They're actually decent supporting characters, and it's legitimately sweet with how they willingly help Luz. As for Amity, it's great to see that she still takes things seriously despite crushing on Luz. Most shows fall into the trap of making characters a nervous wreck when around their crushes. And while Amity does have those moments, there are still scenes like this that prove she isn't just some smitten kitten-and I hate myself for saying that. Amity is the voice of reason to her and Luz's relationship. And I'm glad that the writers mostly focus on that aspect of her personality rather than write her off as a flustered girl with a crush.

Those boys dancing together: While it's nice to see Luz and Amity's relationship blossom, that doesn't mean we should sleep on great representation such as this. While it's great to see so many romantic pairings between females in the last few years, it's rare to see two boys liking each other, especially in animation. Sure, male pairings exist, but I haven't seen them as celebrated as often as female ones. This is why it's nice to see that The Owl House crew sprinkled in these two boys dancing with each other. Representation matters for everyone, and this little acknowledgment is something worth mentioning, even if it isn't the main ship.

The hallway scene: But let's face it, this is what we came to see. Now when you think about it, there's nothing all that special with this scene. It's a typical romantic moment with a heart to heart discussion followed with witty banter, all while a romantic melody is playing in the background. You see this in multiple types of media, especially in Disney cartoons. The only difference is that this scene features a same-sex pairing and that what makes it amazing. It's essentially normalizing something that has been seen as inappropriate for years. And the fact that Disney of all companies is the one that greenlit a scene like this? That just makes this moment all the more impressive. Plus, I mean, c'mon. You have to have a will of iron not to think these dorks are adorable with this little exchange.

Splash zone: There's not much to talk about or analyze here. I just think the dark humor of a kid waiting in the 'splash zone' is funny. Because what does the splash zone get used for? Grom? The fighter? I don't know, but the fact that a splash zone exists for either of those reasons is what gets a chuckle out of me.

Skara and her date getting hyped for Grom fight: That's it. Skara is officially the best background character. I'm sorry, but a character earns that title when they immediately switch from wanting to kiss their date to "WHOO! BRING ON THE GORE!"

I don't make the rules. I just abide by them.

Luz’s greatest fear: This is something fans could have seen coming due to rewatching and reanalyzing the promo that dropped a little over a month ago. But for fans who ignored the promo, the episode did a great job of setting up this reveal. From the two times that Luz practically ignored her mother's texts, it can be pretty clear that Luz's fear would be something involving Camilia. However, before the episode premiered, everyone jumped on the idea that Luz's greatest fear would be Camilia forcing Luz to come back home. Instead, the scene portrays Luz's greatest fear as her mother's negative response to Luz lying for weeks. That idea is much more interesting to me because it reveals how much Luz cares so much about what her mother thinks of Luz. And unlike Amity with her parents, Luz's fears are much more justified due to Camilia actually being a good mother. A mother who planned to send her daughter away to summer camp, sure, but still a mother who would do that type of thing out of love rather than to protect an image. Which makes me hope to see more of Camilia in the future, just to witness the mother/daughter relationship she has with Luz. Because honestly, it feels like I've been working triple time with portraying that relationship myself.

Amity’s greatest fear: Ah yes, the one thing none of us could have predicted...ok, that's not true. Some of us did predict this, but most of us didn't take those predictions seriously. And BOY, were we wrong to do so. Because the idea that Amity's greatest fear is being rejected by Luz is both sad, yet kind of adorable. It proves just how much Amity has come to care for the same human she nearly got dissected, in episode THREE. It's a nice bit of character growth that I just can't help but gush over how sweet it is. But again, it's also depressing knowing that Amity is afraid by being rejected by Luz of all people. Luz! The girl who's sweeter than honey and would absolutely let Amity down gently if Luz didn't feel the same way (Which she does. She just doesn't realize it yet.). What's even more interesting is that it makes so much sense as to why Amity is more afraid of showing her fear to the school. Not only would Grom reveal that Amity has feelings for Luz, but it also has the problem of outing Amity as a lesbian, presumably long before she's ready. And seeing how her parents reacted to Amity's friendship with Willow, imagine what would happen if word got out that Amity had a crush on a human girl. Yeah, let's just say that Amity must be really grateful that Grom morphed into a vague, shadowy figure.

(Speaking of, can we PLEASE calling Luz oblivious for not knowing that Grom morphed into her? Yes, to us, it's painfully apparent who Grom was supposed to be. But it also looks vague enough to the point where it isn't unbelievable for Luz to not know it was her. Because from where Luz is standing, the only similarity is the height and body shape. If the crew stuck to using Luz's more apparent traits, then I'd say it's fine to say Luz is oblivious. But as is, it's not too far of a stretch for Luz not to know it was her.)

That dance scene!: Remember how some fans have been hoping for a slow dance between Luz and Amity? This is better.

From the choreography to the smooth animation, to their expressions, to even pure epicness of this scene. Everything about this dance is just so astonishing that I am convinced that several fans have watched it over and over and over again since the episode's release. And you want to know the best part? This scene has so many problems that I don't care about due to how great it is. Why does Eda just stand there and do nothing? I don't know, and I don't care. Why does Grom stand there and do nothing? I don't know, and I don't care. How did Luz and Amity come up with this perfect plan without communicating? I don't know, and I don't care. How did Luz catch Amity, even though it looked like they jumped off of the abomination at the same height, and would've landed at the same time? I don't-Ok, you get the point by now.

Don't get me wrong, these are all valid criticisms. But that's the testament of good writing to me. Because if a scene can make me forget/ignore the problems within it, then it's ok in my book!

The cherry blossom: And now we get to that symbolism that I've mentioned before. Because according to a five-second Google search: The Chinese describe the cherry blossom as a symbol for feminine dominance and, of course, a symbol for love. Now the feminine dominance part is clear, but I'm confident that The Owl House staff concentrated more on the whole "symbol of love" thing. Because how else are they supposed to hint that Amity and Luz are meant to be the endgame relationship? Reveal that Amity's gromposal was meant for Luz? C'mon. That would be-

It’s revealed that Amity’s gromposal was meant for Luz: ...You know those moments that are so awesome, iconic, and downright perfect that you just can't help but give a grand old cheer to it? That's this moment right here. Speaking of which: WAH-HOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!

Seriously, some of you have no idea how big this scene is. It would have been so easy to cut the scene short at Amity throwing her half of the note, and leaving it up to interpretation for who the whole thing was for. But the fact that we get to see that it was meant for Luz, thus confirming that Amity has a crush on her, is absolute perfection. Not only is it because this is a big step for Disney in terms of representation, but to me, it seems like a normalization of gay culture. This type of reveal is something that would be done for several heterosexual relationships. So to confirm that Amity has a crush on Luz as if it was nothing...that's...that's just awesome. It's awesome, and I am so happy that Disney even greenlit this decision. And I'm not even gay! So I can not comprehend how some of you are feeling about this moment!

(Also, this does not mean that Lumity is canon. But it does at least mean that Lumity is going to be canon. Only now it's a question of when rather than if.)

Luz’s Text to Home: This was just a sweet moment. You get a better understanding of the love Luz has for her mother within these few seconds, then you did throughout the entire series so far. I also like that this implies that Luz is going to try being more honest with her mom about being in a whole new dimension. Which is again, is something I've been playing with.

Speaking of my aforementioned fanfic, during this entire scene, I was thinking to myself: "Man. Maybe I don't have to write a chapter based on this episode, after all. It pretty much did the job for me. I'm just glad that show didn't do anything that would make what I wrote completely worthless. Because that would just-"

Camilia is getting LETTERS?!: “...Well shit.”

Ok, gags and goofs aside, I honestly love this reveal. Because this presents a whole lot of questions. Like, how is Camilia getting these letters? When did she start getting them? And more importantly: Who the hell is sending them?! This is another thing that I enjoy about The Owl House. Just when you think you're satisfied with the episode you're given, the writers throw in something you could have never expected in a million years. This is why lately, it's a toss-up between The Owl House and Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts for the best show of 2020 for me.

(BTW, WATCH KIPO AND THE AGE OF WONDERBEASTS! It's SO GOOD!)

Those Grom pictures: These were just cute. Especially the last one.

WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE

...Uh...Oh! I know!

King’s B-plot: A small complaint that I have for The Owl House is that most of the b-plots in several episodes just feel unnecessary. Episodes like "The First Day," and "Adventures in the Elements" had b-plots that were pointless and not as engaging as the a-plot. What's worse is that they seem like padding for time, when most of that time could be used for significant moments in the main plot. And honestly, King's story in this episode is the worst one yet. It's filler that is poorly paced and wasn't really all that funny (aside from the other b-plots which at least offered a few good jokes in them). I don't know. Maybe it's because I have Lumity brain rot and wanted more moments between those two, but I just could not get engaged in King's story.

And...yeah, that’s about it.

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This episode deserves a well earned A+! Sure it has its fair share of problems, but the many, MANY, things it does right outweighs what it does wrong. On top of that, its one of the few episodes of any show I've seen that kept me up at night. Why? Because I couldn't stop thinking about how amazing it was. "Enchanted Grom Fright" is a worthy contender for the best episode of the season, and probably the entire series. It was heartwarming, engaging, and quite possibly the most important thing Disney has made in years. What else could you call it other than Enchanting.

(And no, this doesn’t mean I’m reviewing episodes of The Owl House from now on. Just the ones that are worth talking about.)

#the owl house #lumity #what i thought about

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pocket-monsters-precure · 3 years

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Chapter 20: A Lesson in Friendship! Sparking Kala’Au!

“Dys is starving…how dare you all deprive him.”

“We’re sorry, sir…” Entropy, Bedlam and Ataxia chorused as they knelt before Tumult’s shrouded form.

“It is not just your forces on this so-called ‘Unity Island,’” Tumult continued, “But the forces I have stationed across this accursed world. The Precure are growing in number, and they’re reinvigorating the masses. This will severely hamper the production of nega-energy to feed Dys.”

“But what more can we do?” Ataxia asked. “Using the nega-ring to nega-evolve humans causes the ring to break, though humans make much more powerful nega-evolutions…”

“And while we get the people and creatures around the target to panic, generating more nega-energy,” Entropy went on, “Precure show up almost instantly.”

“They’ve garnered a lot of support from those who lack their powers,” Bedlam added, “And it’s slowing down any sort of production of nega-energy. People believe in the Precure.”

“Yes…they are symbols of protection for their people.” Tumult seemed to ponder this for a moment.

“…sir.” Bedlam spoke again.

“What is it, Bedlam?”

“Allow me a chance to conduct an experiment. These Precure are almost all young ladies—they must have an adult supervising or guiding them. I want to track them down and see if I can nega-evolve them. But, I’d like to try it with two nega-rings.”

“Two!?” Ataxia gawked. “You’ve got a lot of nerve even asking for one of those! You’ve already proven you can’t handle the responsibility!”

“I have never granted two nega-rings to a soldier before,” Tumult mused. “And they, as they say, ‘do not grow on trees.’ However…”

Tumult’s ethereal form leaned forward, seeming to gaze deep into Bedlam’s eyes. Mist surrounded Bedlam’s wrists, as the nega-rings formed around them.

“I will allow this experiment. Just once. Locate and turn their support…and we have the chance to trample the Precure.”

===

Mewtwo glided slowly across the room, a tablet floating at eye-level in front of him. Precure, nega-evolutions, nega-energy…so much to update himself on; now that he had allied himself with Doctor Pierce and the Precure under her supervision, he had access to information he lacked previously from merely skimming the minds of the populace. It was a temporary truce, but a beneficial one.

…except for the matter of fascinated children like Kailani, who was watching him with stars in her eyes and a grin from cheek to cheek.

“Kailani…” Naomi sat at the table nearby, doing homework and looking very unimpressed. “Stop staring. You’re being all kinds of rude right now.”

Kailani shook her head a bit, and turned to face Naomi. “I’m sorry, it’s just that…well, a highly-intelligent, super-powerful legendary pokemon is right in front of us! And it’s reading a tablet!”

“He, not it. Male designation, remember? And calm down. Stop treating him like some kinda sideshow attraction; I’m sure he doesn’t appreciate it.”

“I don’t mean to be offensive…” Kailani glanced over her shoulder at Mewtwo as he raised a paw and swiped at the screen, changing the information displayed. “But…this is a chance to make an amazing ally and friend. In Alola, our culture emphasizes working alongside pokemon, and considering his intelligence is on par with a human’s, this could be a whole new kind of bond!” Kailani took a breath. “I’m…I’m gonna try and make friends with him!”

“….uh-huh.” Naomi looked back to her homework. “Just don’t get yourself horribly maimed.”

Kailani turned and went to approach Mewtwo. “Hey!”

Mewtwo glanced up. Kailani made an arch with her hands.

“A-loooo-la!” She gave him a toothy grin.

…beg pardon?

“The traditional Alola greeting! You try!”

I’d rather not. I’m busy. Mewtwo focused back on the tablet.

“Come on…I feel we’d be much stronger allies if you’d just open yourself up a bit more to us. We could be great friends—“

I have no interest in friendship with any of you. I merely agree with your efforts to solve this nega-evolution epidemic and am offering my strength in exchange for information.

“But…”

“Kailani, try not to press him too much,” Dr. Pierce walked over and placed a hand on her shoulder, “This is a huge step out of his comfort zone, and we’re all still strangers to him. He’s lived his life not trusting humans at all.”

“I know, but…” Kailani’s shoulders dropped a bit. Dr. Pierce noticed the tablet floating back to her; she took it in her hands as Mewtwo teleported out.

“Come to think of it,” Naomi spoke up, “Where do you think he goes when he leaves here?”

“I’m sure he’s doing his own investigation…” Dr. Pierce mused.

“Maybe we can help with that! We’ll investigate, too!” Kailani piped up, “I mean, all we’ve really done is just fight the nega-evolutions; we should do more!”

“Like what?” Naomi asked, not looking up from her homework.

“Let’s ask around town! Get all the information we can get from firsthand accounts!” Kailani grabbed Naomi’s arm. “Come on, let’s get started!”

“Wh—hey! I’m doing homework!” Naomi complained as Kailani pulled her out of her seat and out the door. Dr. Pierce sighed as she closed the door after them.

Getting an idea and immediately heading out the door, she thought, Reminds me of my brother.

===

“It’s like mega-evolution, kinda,” a shopkeeper was saying to a customer, “But….evil, I guess, is the word?”

“Y’know, it’s kinda like that dynamaxing thing that’s goin’ on in Galar?” one shopping girl said to another.

“It’s worrisome,” one nosy old lady sighed, “What if the Precure are the cause of the problem in the first place? Humans shouldn’t be fighting pokemon…”

“It’s no use…” Kailani sighed as she sat on a bench with Naomi. “It’s either info we already know, or speculation!”

“Why are we trying to help out a psychic who can just pick up information from scanning brains, again?” Naomi bit into a cookie she had bought during their search.

“I mean, he can’t scan every brain all at once, right? I just…” she sighed.

“Look, I get it. Where you’re from, working alongside pokemon is a huge cultural thing, right? But you can’t help people who don’t want help, Kailani.”

“He didn’t say he didn’t want it!”

“That’s not my point…” Naomi put a hand on her shoulder. “Look, we tried, and we got nothing. Let’s just call it a day.”

“I guess…” Kailani slumped a bit.

“How about we get some ice cream?”

“…did you not just eat a cookie?”

“It wasn’t that big a cookie; don’t judge me.”

The pair began to walk toward the ice cream parlor in town, Kailani still hemming and hawing the entire time.

“Look, if you wanna try and make friends with the guy, don’t get up in his face,” Naomi continued, “Maybe…small, subtle gestures are what work with him? Baby steps.”

“Baby steps, huh…?” Kailani mumbled, staring at the ground, only to become distracted as she noticed Naomi had stopped walking. “What is it?”

“Check out the ice cream parlor…!”

Kailani followed Naomi’s gaze, seeing the ice cream parlor in question was completely coated in ice. “Whoah! Did the blast freezer go haywire!?”

“That’s no haywire blast freezer…”

“Everyone, stay back!” A police officer declared, trying to keep the gathering crowd under control.

“There’s people still inside!” A bystander declared.

“We better call for the others,” Naomi said as she looked to Kailani.

“Call for ‘em, but we gotta get in there and help.”

“The ice is spreading!” A woman shrieked, as people began to flee; true to her word, the ice was spreading out, seeming to be trying to enclose the people outside.

“It’s full of typos, but a panicked, misspelled text should get them coming,” Naomi hurriedly put away her phone, grabbing Kailani’s hand and heading toward the chaos, against the flow of fleeing bystanders.

“Neeeeeegaaaaaaa…..” a loud, low voice rumbled. The pair looked to each other.

“And, here we go,” the pair said in unison, not sounding thrilled in the least. A wall of ice shot up behind them, and the two slowly turned to see a sinister, but distinct, trio of faces within the ice leering at them.

“NEGA-VANIIIIILUXE!” It bellowed. The girls let out a surprised yelp, scrambling back in surprise before pulling out their Cure Compacts.

“Precure! I! Choose! You!”

Sunrise and Starlight stood before the icy wall, as a massive spike of ice shot toward them. Quickly, Sunrise grabbed onto the end of the spike.

“Wake-up Shock!” she cried, as electricity surged up the spike and struck the three massive faces, but to no effect. “What!?”

“It might not be the real monster!” Starlight theorized. “It’s gotta be nearby, though!”

“Right…! Let’s get into the parlor!”

As the pair started to run, however, they immediately slipped on the ice, toppling atop one another.

“Forgot about that,” Starlight muttered sheepishly, “Whoops.”

“Come on..!” Sunrise scrambled to her feet with some trouble, helping Starlight up and heading toward the parlor. Though the door was frozen over, the pair teamed up with a powerful kick to break the ice and force it open. As they rushed through the door, they were struck by a full-body rush of cold air.

“…I don’t remember the ice cream parlor being this big,” Starlight spoke.

Before the two girls was a frozen wasteland; icy cliffs surrounded them, as the bitter cold chilled them to the bone.

“Wh-what happened to the ice cream parlor!?” Sunrise wailed.

“This is no ordinary nega-evolution,” Starlight muttered, deeply concerned. “And they said people were still inside!”

“There’s a cave over there!” Sunrise pointed to a hole in the cliff side, grabbing Starlight by the arm and, after testing her footing, running toward it, stumbling a few times from the harsh wind.

“Aaaand GO!” Starlight threw her weight forward, pulling herself and Sunrise into the cave as they landed in a pile. “Oof—!”

“P-Pretty Cure…!” A voice gasped. The girls looked up to see the parlor owner, as well as a few customers, all huddled together to stay warm.

“Is everyone alright?” Sunrise asked.

“C-Cold, but safe,” the parlor owner frowned. “What has happened to my poor little shop? And my Vanilluxe?”

“Hold on, that’s your Vanilluxe that got nega-evolved?” Starlight asked incredulously.

“Well, only as of recent,” he replied, “I received it in a trade with a dear friend—I hoped we would become good friends, but….it hasn’t taken to me very well.”

“That sounds like a recipe for nega-evolution, alright,” Sunrise muttered to Starlight, before looking back at the parlor owner, “What do you mean by ‘hasn’t taken to you?’”

“I’ve tried everything—making snacks for it, talking to it a lot, spending lots of time with it…but I feel like every time I tried to get closer to it, I just pushed it away.”

“I kinda get that,” Starlight reasoned.

“What…?” He blinked in surprise. Sunrise even looked to Starlight, confused.

“Think about it,” Starlight responded, “The Vanilluxe was in a new environment with a new trainer, who instantly acted like they were best friends. It’s basically like expecting a wild pokemon to love you right away.”

Sunrise stared back at her, her stomach twinging as she connected the dots. “So it was stressed and scared in a new place…making it right for nega-evolution.”

“Now you’re gettin’ it,” Starlight nodded. “Well, now we know what caused the problem, but now we have to solve it.”

Sunrise frowned, deep in thought. “Well, we need to find Nega-Vanilluxe and fight it, but it turned the ice cream parlor into a snowy wasteland! How do we find it?”

“Well, we’re Precure, and it’ll wanna fight us…I’m sure we won’t have to look for long. In the meantime, we should try and help the people here warm up. Do you have a fire-type on you? I admit I only have my Absol with me today…”

Sunrise clapped her hands together. “Yes! I had pulled my Torkoal from my PC for a class today!”

Not much later, the Torkoal was now standing in the center of the parlor, venting heat from its shell as the guests gathered around it, praising and thanking it. The two Cures shared a grin, before nodding to one another and running outside.

“Come on out, Nega-Vanilluxe!” Starlight shouted, the pair taking offensive stances opposite each other. To their surprise, what appeared to be eight vanilluxes appeared around them, giving off sinister auras.

“Shadowlings!” Sunrise exclaimed; the pair were caught by surprise as each unleashed a burst of Powder Snow.

“No you don’t!” Starlight attempted to throw a Comet Burst, only to miss completely as she was blinded by the snow.

“Wake-up Shock!” Sunrise clapped her hands together, unleashing a thunderclap that startled the Shadowling Vanilluxes into stopping their attack. “We’re here for the Nega-Vanilluxe! Stand down!”

“They’re not legitimate pokemon, Sunrise,” Starlight frowned, “Just imitation puppets. They’re not gonna listen!”

Suddenly, a snowball struck one of the Shadowlings, prompting it to look over. Some of the customers had come out of the parlor and were now chucking snowballs at the Shadowlings to distract them, all while Torkoal toddled out and putted out bits of fire to keep the Shadowlings back from the innocent civilians.

“Do your best, Precure!” A child customer cheered, “Find the bad pokemon!”

“Stay safe, guys!” Starlight said with a wave, the pair of Precure running through the group of Shadowlings to continue their search.

“Okay, have a look around,” Sunrise suggested, “I know it’s a wasteland, but there has to be SOMETHING of note here—“

“The mountain,” Starlight had stopped running and turned around, staring up. Sunrise soon followed her gaze—and she saw it. The three sinister faces peering out of the mountain’s three peaks as it loomed over the wasteland.

“How did we not notice that when we got in here!?” Starlight squawked.

“NEGAAAA!” Nega-Vanilluxe roared, shooting a storm of ice spikes at them; the pair opted to jump up, vaulting over and bounding off of the soaring spikes to get closer to the main “head” of the beast. As they successfully struck the creature’s face and bounced back, the leftmost head blew them away with icy wind, causing them to go sailing, screaming in alarm.

“Gotcha!” A pair of voices shouted; Wish and Willow had arrived and caught the pair, landing safely on the ground.

“Just in time!” Sunrise sighed in relief.

“Sorry, we had trouble getting through the wall of ice,” Wish admitted, “What are we up against?” She squinted at the Nega-Vanilluxe through the wind and snow.

“Recently-traded pokemon stressed and overwhelmed by everything,” Starlight replied. “I kinda don’t blame it—the new trainer just instantly started treating it like a best friend without getting to know it, apparently.”

Sunrise had fallen silent, thinking this over. She couldn’t help but draw parallels. Then, she nodded. “Well, we can talk to the trainer about it, but first we need to turn the poor Vanilluxe back to normal!”

“Look out!” Wish threw up a Full Moon Aegis to block another barrage of ice spikes. “First we need a way to get close to it safely!”

“I bet I can do something! Cure Ball!” Willow held out her hand, as a pastel-colored pokeball formed in it. “I’ll use a Cure Aura attack with my Cyndaquil!”

As Cyndaquil was released from the ball, Willow nodded to Wish, who dropped the barrier. As yet another wave of spikes was launched at them, Willow attacked.

“Type: Fire!” She shared a warm aura with her Cyndaquil, which jumped onto her back and clung to her shoulder. “Precure Passionate Inferno!”

The oncoming spikes were met with a wall of flame launched back at them, while the remaining three Cures ran underneath the chaos to get close to Nega-Vanilluxe.

“Wish Whimsy Pop!” Wish sent an attack at Nega-Vanilluxe; the balls of light exploded against the base of the mountain-shaped monster, prompting it to roar in anger. Mounds of snow began to rise up around them, taking the form of shadowling Vanillishes and Vanillites.

“We just made it angry…great.” Starlight threw a Comet Burst; she snapped her fingers and the ball split into five, striking five targets. Sunrise, meanwhile, was now jumping from ledge to ledge up the steep beast. “Sunrise!”

“I have an idea!” She called back, then yelped as spikes began to shoot out of the icy walls, narrowly dodging them and using them to jump and climb higher. “Keep fighting!”

“Keep fighting, she says,” Starlight muttered, releasing Absol from a Cure Ball to help keep the number of Shadowlings down.

It’s scared, it’s frustrated, it’s confused… Starlight thought, I wonder if…maybe it can hear me, like Mewtwo could hear Wish…

With one last spring upward, she found herself staring face-to-face with the main head of Nega-Vanilluxe.

“Listen to me!” She called, “We’re here to help you! We know the real you is locked inside this body, inside this mountain!”

“Negaaaa….”

“I know your story!” She landed on a spike that shot out. “I know you were overwhelmed with your new home and new trainer! He didn’t mean to upset you! He just wanted to make you feel welcome and overdid it!”

The creature stared back at her, a low rumble emitting from it.

“I promise…I won’t give up on you!” She declared, “None of us will! And things will get better!”

Nega-Vanilluxe rumbled and trembled, before unleashing a vicious roar, shaking the very air. Sunrise remained firm.

“Don’t shut us out!” She shouted, thrusting her arms out. It was then that she felt a warm sensation running down her arms, as two long, thin rods began to form in front of her palms. She grasped at them, as they took form into white sticks, orange gemstone lightning bolts running up their sides and small, winglike details emerging from the top of each one. As she stared at them, their name came to her.

“…Sparking Kala’au….” She whispered. Indeed, they resembled kala’au, a traditional instrument from Alola. She struck the sticks together, the lightning bolts beginning to light up from the bottom.

“Let’s go!” She struck them again, the light rising up the bolts with each strike. Lighting surged around her, and she felt the tempo come to her as she fluidly continued to strike the sticks together.

“Precure! Festive Ho’olaule’a!”

Sparks shot down from the sky like confetti, striking Shadowlings and chipping away at Nega-Vanilluxe’s defenses, as it seemed paralyzed from the numerous small shocks.

“Now!” She jumped back, landing in a crouch with her teammates down below.

“Precure Quartet Refresh!”

===

“I’m sorry for rushing you into things, Vanilluxe….” the parlor owner frowned, offering a pokepuff to the restored pokemon. “I’ll give you the space you need, but don’t hesitate to come to me if you need something, okay?”

“…Vaniiii….” Vanilluxe hesitantly ate the snack, then started to smile.

“Looks like things will be okay here,” Willow remarked with a smile as the group stood a ways away.

“Yep,” Starlight looked to Sunrise, “Shame we couldn’t find out any new information for Mewtwo like you wanted, though.”

“It’s okay,” Sunrise replied, “….I think I learned something, myself.”

“What is it?” Wish asked.

“I shouldn’t be rushing to try and get on Mewtwo’s good side,” she replied, “He’s got a history that makes it hard for him to trust people, right? So…baby steps.”

“Just like I told you,” Starlight pat her back. “C’mon, let’s head out.”

===

The next day, the girls were gathered at Dr. Pierce’s house again, doing homework, when Kailani arrived.

“I brought malasadas!” She declared with a big grin, “I made them in class! They’re a native Alolan treat!”

“Oh, I’ve had them before; they’re so good!” Fae beamed as she set down the plate of treats.

“Thank you, Kailani,” Dr. Pierce added, taking one for herself. Kailani grinned back, then noticed Mewtwo floating in a far corner of the room, again reading the tablet floating in front of him. She took a breath, then walked over, setting down a malasada on the nearby end table.

“Here. There’s one for you if you want it,” she said with a smile, before tipping her head and turning to go sit with her friends. Mewtwo briefly glanced up, watching her leave before looking to the snack on the end table. As the girls engaged in conversation, he went back to the tablet. But moments later, the malasada floated up to him. Kailani snuck a peek over her shoulder, grinning a bit before turning back to her friends.

The group was unaware that outside, Bedlam was seated in a tree, leaning against its trunk with a scowl.

“So, they do have someone acting as a guide….” He looked to his nega-ring. “I won’t fail Dys..I’ll destroy the Precure piece by piece, starting with their most ardent supporters.”

#pocket monsters precure #pocket monsters pretty cure #pokemon precure #pokemon pretty cure #precure #pretty cure #fanseries #precure fanseries #pretty cure fanseries #fancure #fanfic #magical girl #pokemon #chapter 20

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darcyfarrow2005 · 5 years

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Coleslaw and Daggers for @rumbellebigbang. Art by Mrs.-Stiltskin, story by DarcyFarrow

Pink. The mansion of the richest man in town, the fortress of the world’s most powerful sorcerer, the lair of the dark beast, is pink.

Only a trickster would paint his house pink. The god Loki, the Trickiest of Tricksters, folds his arms across his chest as he stands, feet firmly planted on the concrete sidewalk traversing the edge of Mr. Gold’s lawn--Mr. Gold’s freshly manicured lawn, with a riding Lawnboy parked beside the garage and a swing set and a Little Tikes Rider visible in the backyard.

The King of Chaos chuckles humorlessly. Oh, a fine trickster this Dark One is, projecting the guise of ordinary family man. A deceiver extraordinaire. A worthy adversary. Under Loki’s arm is the latest issue of this hamlet’s news/gossip rag, The Storybrooke Mirror, upon the front page of which is a photo of local businessman/mage extraordinaire Mr. Gold, a. k. a. Rumplestiltskin, a. k. a. the Dark One. In the photo he stands beside Mrs. Gold, a. k. a. the mortal Belle, a. k. a. the newly re-elected leader of Storybrooke (her inauguration is the article’s subject). Mr. Gold, in his three-piece Dolce & Gabbana, smiles proudly yet sternly in the photo; Mrs. Gold smiles tiredly.

Scattered throughout the rest of the birdcage-bottom liner are more mentions of their names, Gold more frequently than his wife: articles about Gold’s activities with the Chamber of Commerce, Gold’s plans to build a new apartment complex, Gold’s donation of a computer lab to the public library—then there’s the odd one, a second-page article about the Dark One’s easy defeat of a flying monkey attack on City Hall. Second-page? From the placement Loki surmises that flying monkey attacks are no big deal in Storybrooke—or at least, the Dark One’s defeat of them. In the classifieds are advertisements for Mr. Gold Pawnbroker, Gold Real Estate and Gold Rentals. It’s through this newspaper that Loki has figured out who’s the Big Mage on Campus here. It’s through some subtle questioning (and a bit of flirting with the wait staff) at the local watering hole that Loki has learned Gold’s whereabouts.

And it’s through his own clever scheming that Loki of Asgard has come to this town after his somewhat embarrassing failure to bring New York City to its knees. Licking his wounds (and wincing whenever the TV news mentions the Hulk, which occurs disturbingly often) in a Manhattan presidential suite, Loki reassessed his battle plans: where he’d gone wrong was taking a strong-arm approach. How he’d let Thanos talk him into charging in with an army, he’d never know (oh, he has his suspicions: whenever Thanos is around, Loki’s mind tends to go blank). A head-on Thorian attack isn’t the God of Skulduggery's style. The needle, the pen, the fine point of a deal, that’s more his style. A puppeteer, that’s what he is, using his magic to pull the strings.

Re-strategizing has led the Rightful Future King of Asgard to the only magic-drenched community in Midgard, where witches, wizards, sorcerers, fairies and lesser magic folk abound, just waiting to be turned toward Loki’s glorious purpose, whether by deals or by force. These folk, he’s learned from their lunchroom gossip, are exhausted from magic fights and nervous for when “the next Cora, Zelena, Pan, Hyde or Hades” will upend their town’s peace again. They need real leadership, not this paper-pusher they just re-elected. It won’t take much to bring them crawling to the God of Manipulation’s feet. A quick, humiliating, public defeat of their most powerful mage will do the trick.

Loki snorts. The Dark One, the most powerful magic user in all the realms, they think their Mr. Gold is. The front-page photo says otherwise: short, skinny, middle-aged. Not even big enough for a god to wipe Main Street with. And a pink house and a Lawnboy? The God of Disruption won’t even work up a good sweat. Without blinking an eye, Loki changes from his Armani to his leather battle gear and transports himself to the top of the garage to study the battleground.

Loki’s mouth drops open in disappointment. He finds his opponent positioned beside a barbeque grill, a spatula in hand, a pair of sunglasses shielding his eyes, and a “Kiss the Cook” apron tied over his three-piece suit. Mrs. Dark One is setting dinner places at an umbrella-protected picnic table while a toddler in a high chair is blowing and splatting spit bubbles with his grubby little hands. With a hasty glance over his shoulder to assure himself that his wife isn’t looking, Gold tosses a magic fireball into the grill to light the coals, then proceeds to lay out the hamburgers. Oh, so the Dark One keeps up this pretense of innocence for his wife, the God of Mischief thinks –as the aroma of grilling burgers tickles his nose and his stomach growls. Gold’s either very very tricky or. . . he’s a nerd in sorcerer’s clothing.

Magically transporting himself atop the picnic table (disregarding the dish of Grey Poupon his boots land in) Loki declares himself. “Dark One! I am Loki, Savior and Rightful King of Asgard, and the God of Magic and Mayhem!”

The wife grabs a dishtowel from her waistband and swats at Loki’s boots. “Look out, Mayhem. You’ve ruined the mustard and you’re trailing wet grass all over my picnic table.”

Entertained—and not frightened in the least—by the new arrival’s magical appearance, the baby bounces and claps his hands. Rumplestiltskin merely pushes the sunglasses up onto his head so he can examine the visitor more clearly. “The new paperboy, I presume?” Turning back to the grill, he salts the burgers as Loki announces his intentions, rather annoyed by the unfazed reception he’s received so far: “Didn’t you hear me? I said I’m Loki of Asgard, a God. Mayhem and mischief and magic.”

The Dark Cook glances over his shoulder long enough to make a rolling motion with his free hand, urging the god to get to the point.

Is this feigned boredom another of the Dark One’s tricks? “I’ve come to conquer this realm,” Loki insists. “I have powers beyond your wildest imaginings.”

Still intent on his grilling, the Dark One throws over his shoulder: “I have coleslaw.”

“I will crush you, this very afternoon, and I will drag you, bloody and mewling, down the street that bears your nemesis’ name, and toss your quavering, broken body across the town square for all those who once feared you to laugh as you beg for my mercy. And then when I’ve stolen every last scrap of magic from your shattered soul, I will finish you off with my daggers.”

The Dark One—Rumplestiltskin is his human name, and Loki will remind him of his puny natural state by using that name from now on—glances over his shoulder at his wife, who’s mopping up mustard and scowling. “Talks a lot, doesn’t he?”

Belle sighs in aggravation as she swipes her cloth over Loki’s boots. “Again? I'd hoped our villain-of-the-week subscription had expired.”

“It has been a while since the last attack, sweetheart. We’re overdue,” Rumplestiltskin points out.

Belle comes around to her husband’s side and pokes his ribs. “Just as well. You could use the workout.”

He kisses the top of her head. “It's because you spoil me, my love.” Annoyed at being ignored, Loki clears his throat. “Hello, danger over here or have you forgotten?” Belle reaches up to poke Loki’s ribs. “You, on the other hand, need to put on a few pounds. When was the last time you ate?”

Rumple waves his spatula at the grill. “Look, Lucky–“

“Loki,” the god corrects.

“My family and I are hungry. Can we do this magic-fight after lunch?”

The baby claps his hands.

“Now Ruuuumple,” Belle says in a warning tone, “you’re not being a nice host. You know, I bet Lucky’s so crabby because he hasn’t had his lunch yet.”

Loki is flabbergasted by this mild-mannered spousal exchange. “I appear before you threatening to destroy you and you offer me hamburgers?” Belle shrugs. “My husband’s an excellent cook. See?” She points at his apron. “He has the apron to prove it.”

Rumplestiltskin twirls his spatula. “How do you want yours?” Loki sputters. “My—?” “Burger. Rare, medium rare, medium well—” The god huffs. “I am here to destroy you and take over your kingdom, you fool.”

Belle whacks at Loki’s boots with her salad tongs. “Get down from my table before you break something.” When he’s grounded, she advises, more sympathetically, “You really shouldn't fight on an empty stomach. Look, we've got plenty: burgers, coleslaw, baked beans, salad, apple pie and homemade ice cream. Here.” She tosses a plastic ball at him. “Play catch with Gid while I toss the salad.”

With a flick of his wrist, Rumple conjures a beach blanket and plants his giggling son and the intruder in the middle of it. Befuddled (and just a little bit nervous that perhaps he’s underestimated his opponent’s power) Loki seats himself open-legged on the blanket and rolls the ball toward the baby, who claps his hands before rolling it back. As the game begins, the god mumbles, “I am a sorcerer, you idiot. I can move planets, crush stars, summon legions of demons with a single thought.” Rumple shrugs as he flips the burgers. “Okay.”

“I am a prince.” With his spatula, Rumple points one by one to his neighbors’ houses. “A queen lives there; she now sells shoes. Over there’s a former king. Three blocks down in a walk-up flat lives the Savior. In a ranch house outside of town you’ll find Queen Snow White and Prince Charming. She teaches elementary school; he raises sheep. My wife's a princess.”

Belle clicks her tongue as she drizzles vinaigrette onto the salad. “You can't turn around in this town without bumping into a blue blood.” Rumple continues, “Frankly I'd have been more impressed if you'd said you're a podiatrist. We need one of those.” “I’m a shape shifter.” Without blinking, Loki changes himself into Bruce Banner (okay, a slight misfire there: he meant to shift into the Hulk), then when Gideon yelps a protest, he quickly resumes his Asgardian form.

Rumple snaps his fingers and suddenly Thor stands in his place, the spatula having converted into a miniature Mjolnir. Looking on, Gid yawns and tosses the plastic ball.

“I always preferred you with long hair, darling, but not that long. It looks unkempt,” Belle complains, and Rumple changes himself back.

“That’s what I keep telling Thor.” Loki is growing red in the face, and it’s only partially because the baby has hit him on the nose with the ball. He tries again to impress. “I have daggers.” Rumple rolls his eyes, summons his dagger and slices a block of cheese with it.

Loki persists, “I am immortal.”

“Boring, isn't it?” Rumple scoops up a burger and slides it onto a platter. “Hey, what do you do about the gray in your hair? I notice you don’t have any. Magic or Clairol?”

The baby, apparently regretting his misaimed throw, crawls across the blanket and plops himself into Loki’s lap, then reaches up to pat the injured nose.

Belle throws another cautionary “Ruuuumple” over her shoulder. “That’s too personal a question. Besides,” she stage-whispers, “it’s obvious: he wears a wig.”

“I do no such thing!” the god sputters. But his insult cools as the baby leans up to kiss his nose and inquire, “Aw bedder?”

Belle ties a bib around the baby’s neck before kissing his plump cheek. “Good boy, Gid.” She straightens, a fond smile spreading across her face. “Say, Lucky—”

“Loki.”

“Would you mind if he sat on your lap while we eat? He’s taken a shine to you.”

“I am the God of Chaos! I don’t hold babies!”

Belle pats his shoulder. “There’s a first for everything. Here.” She ties a bib around Loki’s neck. “He’s likely to spill on you.”

Before the god can complain further, a cloud of purple magic has enveloped him, and when it clears he finds himself seated at the picnic table with the giggling Gideon securely perched on his knee. “I’ll fix your plate for you. Onions on your burger? Ketchup? We’re out of Grey Poupon.” She tosses that last comment out with a blatant glare at Loki’s boots.

“I could conjure—”

“No, you don’t, Rumple. You know how I feel about magicked food.” She spears up a pickle for Loki’s plate. “Magicked food is all calories and no flavor, don’t you think?”

“I’m sure I wouldn’t know.” Loki grabs the baby’s fist just in time to prevent him from slamming it into the potato salad. As the baby blows a raspberry, the god pushes the potato salad bowl out of reach.

“Now don’t be rude, Gideon. I’ll make your plate next.” She smiles at Loki. “I have to cut his food into small bites. Baked beans? Jello?”

The god’s stomach growls and he blushes as he relents. “I wouldn’t mind a scoop of that potato salad, Mrs. Gold. The burgers smell delicious.”

“My own secret recipe.” With a slight smirk, Rumplestiltskin seats himself across from the god, then cuts one of the burgers into tiny bits. “I’ll fix Gid’s plate, sweetheart. You sit down and eat.”

“Thanks, darling. I am famished.” For such a petite mortal, Loki thinks as he watches her load her plate, she sure can pack it away.

Suddenly she stands. “I really do want some mustard. We have a bottle of French’s in the fridge. I’ll be back in a minute.”

Politely, the men pop up on their feet as she vacates the table for the house. Once she’s inside, Rumplestiltskin passes his glowing hand over the pitcher of iced tea and it transforms into a reddish-brown liquid, of which he pours out two glasses. “Grunhelian whiskey. I understand it’s a favorite of you Asgardian gods. Just don’t tell Belle.”

Loki raises an eyebrow (this Midgardian knows more than Loki thought he would). He thinks about tattling to Belle: a domestic spat between the Dark One and the Missus could be entertaining. But after his first sip he decides the whiskey’s almost as delicious as the burger, so he’ll keep Rumplestiltskin’s secret. As Belle jogs back to the picnic table with a mustard jar, Rumple hastily swipes his glowing hand over the pitcher again, then blinks innocently. As she seats herself, he pours her a glass, for which she thanks him, then he forks up a bite of burger for his son. The boy giggles as he clamps his tiny teeth on the fork to yank the meat off. Loki almost forgets to eat as he stares, flabbergasted, at the incredible sight of this realm’s most powerful mage forking food into a baby’s mouth. Belle nudges Loki, offering the yellow bottle. “Mustard?”

“No, thank you; I prefer my burgers free of condiments.”

“A purist, huh. I take that as a compliment to my grilling,” Rumplestiltskin nods. He pushes the platter of burgers toward his guest. “Have another.”

The meal is tasty and filling, Loki has to admit. He’s beginning to feel replenished. Maybe it was a good idea to eat before fighting. He gulps down the last of his tea, then tilts his empty glass toward his host. “May I have some more of that refreshing tea, Mr.—ah, Dark One?”

Belle being occupied with her mustard, Rumplestiltskin fills the glass, then passes his hand over it with a wink. When Belle glances up, biting into her burger, her husband blinks innocently again. Belle smiles at him, a smear of mustard crossing her cheek. Rumplestiltskin reaches across the table and dabs it away with his napkin.

The baby on Loki’s lap grabs up a handful of Jello and pops it into his mouth. He then reaches up to offer Loki a handful of the green goo. The god accepts the offering with a weak smile—as a god, he’s quite used to receiving lame offerings. He swallows, then introduces a topic of conversation. “What is a dark one, anyway?” Rumple licks up a drop of ketchup before it can escape his bun. “Kinda hard to explain. What is a god?” “Kinda hard to explain.” “I suppose I could have ruled a realm or two. It just seemed like too much trouble. Hard enough being the town’s primary solver of magic problems. You'd be surprised how much trouble a town of two thousand souls can get into.” “I was the king of Asgard for a while. Sort of. I enjoyed it immensely, except for the ‘help me, Your Highness’ part. Yeah. Too much trouble.” “So why do you want to defeat Rumple and rule Storybrooke?” Belle asks. Loki shrugs. “It's what I do.” “Why?” “To have people kneel at my feet, of course.”

Rumple scowls. “Sounds like something Cora would say.” “And look where that got her,” Belle points out. “So Lucky, what else have you accomplished in life?” Loki tries to think, but Gideon’s now stuffing a handful of lettuce in the god’s mouth. “I led an army.” “We don't have an army,” Rumple remarks. “I wrote and directed a critically acclaimed play.” Belle perks up. “Oh, now that we could use. Regina wants to start a community theater. It would pay minimum wage but we could cut you in on the box office.” Having watched The Lion King on Broadway three times, Loki understands the concept of box office. “A theater director?” “We could upgrade the title: King of Thespians or God of Stagecraft or something like that.”

It’s almost tempting. He did have a lot of fun staging The Tragedy of Loki. But he shakes his head to clear it of the pleasant buzz that’s creeping in. “Thank you, but no. I came here to conquer and rule.”

“So unoriginal.” Belle clicks her tongue. Then she brightens. “Rumple, I hate to send him away empty-handed though. If he really wants to run things in Storybrooke, maybe we could give him a trial run, see how he does.” Rumplestiltskin considers. “Sure, why not? Everybody else has had a turn at being mayor.” Belle waves her fork in the air. “I'm on my third term and frankly I'm bored with it. I'd rather go back to shelving books.” The Dark One suggests, “Suppose you appoint him Mayor for a Day.”

Loki gapes as his fate cavalierly ping-pongs between husband and wife. “That's a wonderful idea, Rumple. Then the three of us could spend a day at the beach.” “Fine for us,” Rumple agrees, “but let's see how he handles the garbage collectors strike, the collapse of the troll bridge, the graffiti sprayed on the sheriff's office and rising unemployment among displaced royals.”

“Maybe a fresh perspective is just what we need.” Belle stands, removing a slobbered-on hamburger bun from Gideon. “All right, young man, now you’re just playing. Time for your bath.” She cradles her son against her chest, and the men rise again until she’s walked back into the pink house.

“More Grunhelian ‘tea’?” Rumplestiltskin offers. Loki nods. In silence they polish off their burgers and the pitcher.

“Look, you folks have been quite hospitable, and I hate to be rude, but I’ve got a job to do and I mustn’t be dissuaded.” Loki waves his hand over the pitcher, refilling it. He pours glasses for his host and himself. “I am, after all, burdened with glorious purpose.”

“Intent is meaningless, dearie.” Rumplestiltskin nods toward the house, where, from an open second-story window, a lullaby can be heard. “That’s what means something. You’ve never been married, have you?”

“Haven’t had time for it.”

“I get it. Needed to get your career off the ground, make a little money first.”

“Glorious purpose, remember.”

“Remind me, what is that purpose, again?”

Loki’s feeling a little lightheaded and it’s hard to focus. “I have to prove. . . something. To my father. That he was wrong about me.”

“Daddy issues,” the Dark One drawls, his speech beginning to be slightly affected by the whiskey. “Let me tell you about daddy issues.”

“Oh no, let me tell you. You know what I found out, the day after I turned 1400? The man I thought was my father actually stole me. Took me from my people, when I was a newborn. My real father abandoned me because I was a runt.”

“Mine named me Rumplestiltskin as a way of getting back at me for being born. And then he dragged me along to every con game, card game and pocket picking he got involved in. He used me as a distraction, because I was a runt and people felt sorry for me.”

“Odin promised me I’d be king when he stepped down. Instead he chose my brother—or, rather, the guy he’d claimed was my brother, before Odin told me the truth. But he really wasn’t, because, you know, the stealing thing.”

“The big, blond muscle head,” Rumplestiltskin says sympathetically. “I have one too.” He pitches his voice in a mocking, nasal whine. “Charming!”

Loki helps himself to a refill. “It was right after he announced that Thor would be king that he told me about that. Odin lied to me all those years. He never intended to make me king because I wasn’t his blood.”

“At least you got a childhood. When I was seven, my father took me to Neverland, then abandoned me so he could magically de-age himself and become Peter Pan.”

“My foster father was ashamed of me, because I was a Frost Giant.”

“My father was ashamed of me because I existed. He said it was my fault that my mother ran off and became a fairy.”

Loki mumbles, “I did have a pretty good mother—foster mother. That is, until I caused her death.”

“I killed my mother. Because she kidnapped my son and made him her slave and would’ve killed my wife.” Rumple shrugs. “And a whole lot of other people, but who cares about them. Lay a finger on Gideon or Belle, though, and I’ll rip your heart out. Literally.”

“You’ll have to show me that trick sometime. Assuming I let you live after I beat you to a pulp.”

“You mean, assuming I let you live after I turn you into a snail. A signature piece of mine.”

“Snakes, that’s my signature piece.”

Rumple magically refills the pitcher, then pours out glasses for the two of them. “Hey, did you ever try changing sides, becoming a hero?”

“Well. . . .” Loki runs a finger through the condensation on his glass, making a little river of it. “Those roles were already filled. Besides, Thor made it look so boring, all those push-ups and power shakes and the weight-lifting.”

“You could join the Avengers. That looks pretty exciting.”

“I thought about joining the Justice League, just to piss off my brother.”

“I converted, for their sake.” The Dark One nods toward his house. “Being a good guy is boring, but having a wife and baby who look up to you makes it worthwhile. But damn it, sometimes it gets on my nerves, the way this town treats me. They’re always running to me when they have a curse they need breaking. You know what the last one was? One of the nuns accidentally cast it: the Curse of Ingrown Toenails. Everyone in town got ‘em. Guess who they all came whining to.” He points to his chest. “And what thanks do I get for fixing their little problems? Today’s a local holiday. Take a guess who it’s in honor of. It ain’t me, that’s for sure. It’s Grumpy Day. The dwarves’ version of Chicken Little. A dwarf gets a day named after him, but do they ever think to thank the sorcerer who cured their ingrown toenails?”

“My brother gets fifty-two name days every year. Thor’s Day.”

“They named a street Captain Hook Way. When Hook married the Savior, three hundred people showed up for the wedding.”

“Would you really want three hundred people at your wedding?”

“No, but Charming could’ve sent a card. I kinda thought we were bros, at one point.”

“Here.” Loki squints as he stares at his hand. It takes some doing, and it’s not exactly what he intended—he was going to conjure a jack-in-box, but it comes out as a Jumbo Jack Cheeseburger. “A belated baby shower gift.”

Rumple looks perplexed, but he accepts the present. “Thanks.”

“Having a street named after me would be nice,” Loki considers. “Loki Lane.”

“Same here. In gratitude for the toenails.”

“Your name wouldn’t fit on a sign.”

“‘Rumple Road’ would work. Not that I really care for the glory, but it would give my son playground bragging rights. You know, ‘My dad’s the most powerful sorcerer in the realm so they named a street after him.’”

Loki almost reminds Rumplestiltskin that after their magic fight, there’ll be a new “most powerful in the realm.” But he’s not so sure that he’s ready for that fight just now; he’s feeling a bit woozy. Besides, a more irritating thought nags at him. “They named a radioactive element after my brother. What did they name after me? Woodlice.”

The Dark One sighs. “I miss the old days, when being a sorcerer really meant something, you know. When people would trade you their favorite cow for a spell to cure a toothache.”

“Yeah. Or when turning yourself into a snake could a rise out of your brother.”

A shout is carried across the summer breeze: “Lucky! Lucky! Lucky!”

“That’s my wife,” Rumple informs his guest. “She thinks if she calls a sorcerer’s name three times, your magic will make you appear to her. An old superstition that I’ve never disavowed her of. I’d be obliged if you’d go to her.”

“Sure.” Loki ambles, a bit unsteady, across the lawn to position himself beneath the second-story window. “You summoned me, Mrs. Gold?”

She leans her elbows on the window sill. Behind her, he can hear the baby crying. “He won’t go to sleep. He wants his Uncle Lucky to tuck him in.”

He tries to remember what he came here for, and how fierce he needs to be to pull off the threat. “Me? I’m the God of Upheaval. I don’t do tuck-ins.”

“Please?” Belle urges. “He won’t go to sleep without a kiss from Uncle Lucky.”

“A kiss?!”

“And a story. Just a short one. ‘Snow White and the Eight Dwarves,’ ‘Emma and the Beanstalk,’ ‘Rumplestiltskin and the Big Bad Bear,’ it doesn’t matter. He loves them all. Please, Lucky?”

With a huffed “My name is Loki,” the god swings open the screen door and plods, leaning against the walls, up the stairs to the nursery, where the baby suddenly hushes and begins bouncing on his crib mattress instead. As Loki enters the room, slightly disoriented by the dancing pink elephants and the prancing white unicorns plastered on the walls, Gideon stretches out both arms, leaving the god no choice but to pick him up, cuddle him and brush away the quickly drying tears. Belle ushers them to a rocking chair. “Here, sit here. You look a little unnerved. When was the last time you had a nap?”

The baby plops himself down hard on Uncle Lucky’s knee. “Tory,” he demands, then remembers his manners and asks more sweetly, “Tory, peeeeese?” When the lad reclines his head against Loki’s chest, the god relents. “All right. This is one my mother used to tell me and my brother when we were small. It’s called ‘Clever Loki and Crybaby Thor.’ Once upon a time in a land far, far away. . . .”

Before the story is finished, Gideon is fast asleep, drooling on Loki’s leather. Not that the god minds—though he’d never admit that aloud. He secretly smiles as Belle ports the baby to bed. In unison they lean over the crib, watching the toddler’s tiny chest rise and fall in peaceful slumber. “You ought to have one of these,” Belle whispers. “Now that’s a glorious purpose.” She wraps her hand around his arm and steers him back downstairs. “Get a job, a place to live—Rumple has some vacant luxury apartments—and I’ll introduce you around. We seem to have an unusually high population of unmarried young women in this town.”

They find Rumplestiltskin lovingly scrubbing down his grill. He glances up at them. “Did you get Gideon settled?”

Belle nods. “Lucky would make a wonderful babysitter.” She’s reaching for the pitcher and her husband’s eyes widen in alarm, for his secret is about to be exposed. Loki leaps to the rescue, transporting himself over to the rose bushes. “What kind of roses are you growing, Mrs. Gold?” She forgets the tea to escort her guest through the garden. With a sigh of relief, Rumplestiltskin converts the contents of the pitcher to Lipton’s. He mouths something at his rescuer, something that appears to be thanks, buddy.

Buddy. No one has ever called the God of Mischief buddy before. As Belle stoops to sniff her roses, Loki ponders. “Who would I talk to about that mayor job?” He’s feeling all soft and warm and hopeful inside.

Maybe it’s just the tea.

FIVE DAYS LATER

“And we haven’t had a raise in two years! Do you know how much a quart of milk costs these days? We need a COLA!”

“What about our fire truck? We asked for a new truck a year ago. The truck we have now, we have to push it downhill to get it started!”

“If Gold gets to build a 40-unit apartment complex on the west side, why can’t I build a moat around my house?”

“You think you got trouble now. Just wait until the Sanitation Workers Union goes on strike!”

“These zoning laws are anti-business and draconian. Keep up with the times, Mayor!”

“Your predecessor did a weekly story time for the first-grade class. What are you going to do to support education in this town?”

Mayor for the Day Loki Laufeyson Odinson flips a switch on his desk intercom. “Ariel! Ask Granny to deliver a pitcher of Grunhelian tea, immediately!” Then he lowers his head to his mahogany desk and slowly, deliberately bangs his forehead against the wood.

#rumbellebigbang #Rumbelle big bang #rumbelle fic #mrs.-stiltskin loki

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ladylynse · 6 years

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Hi! It’s me again :D Okay, this particular ask is gonna be a bit angsty and bitter but I really curious about it. So, there has been a few fan theories about how Chat Noir might go rouge and defecting to Hawkmoth’s side either because he found out the truth and sincerely shares those same goals or he’s going trick everyone by going undercover without letting anyone know. How will the rest of Secret Quartet react to his ‘betrayal’ and how will they cooperate with Ladybug in regards to this?

@queenofhearts7378 is probably the best person to ask about these sorts of things but I do enjoy giving my take on it (ie I’m still glad to be asked) so here goes nothing.

It would come as a shock, of course. They wouldn’t believe it of him until they see proof of it. He never let on anything the last time they worked together, and he was always so enthusiastic about defeating Hawk Moth with Ladybug whenever the subject came up. He wanted to prove to her that the two of them made a good team, that they should stay a good team. Partners. (Jake had pointed out that, as he understood it, she already did, but Adrien would always dismiss him. There have been too many times where he’s unwittingly left Ladybug to fight the akuma alone; being the one to help her defeat Hawk Moth would prove to both of them that he’s worthy of being her partner and always was, despite the occasional setback and moonlighting as part of the Secret Quartet.)

Ladybug hadn’t met them before this, and she doesn’t know their real identities. She just knows them as Phantom, the American Dragon, and the Ninja. The only reason she can contact them now is that Chat Noir—with their permission—had entrusted her with their contact info. In case he was away and she desperately needed him. In case something happened.

She had never thought something like this would happen.

She didn’t realize anything was amiss at first. He didn’t turn around and threaten her with Cataclysm. He just…missed a few more times than usual. Made a few more mistakes. Every time, it gave the person they were fighting an opportunity to get the jump on her. She didn’t think anything of it at the time. The attacks had gotten more frequent, and they were both exhausted. When she went to recruit other Miraculous users to help with a particular fight, he never questioned it, and she could see how tired he was. How his usual cockiness had become a bit more forced, his smiles more strained. She’d thought it normal. She’d been making more mistakes, too. They’d had a lot of close calls.

She didn’t suspect sabotage, didn’t realize the truth, until she was rooted in place by a villain who could control plants. Chat Noir was still free, and he hadn’t used his Cataclysm yet. She’d called for him to free her.

“I’m sorry, my lady,” he’d said. “I can’t.” And then he’d turned away. Left her to the mercy of the akuma.

Hawk Moth had nearly won that day.

Ladybug had done what she’d felt she’d needed to do. She’d gone to Alya and done an exclusive interview with the Ladyblog. She’d told Paris about Chat Noir’s treachery. She made it clear that they didn’t know his reasons, asked that they not condemn him too harshly until they knew more, but she warned everyone that he was not to be trusted. She didn’t want anyone following him in the belief that he was still a hero. This wasn’t a Copycat, this was her partner. Former partner.

When Alya asked who he really was so everyone would be able to keep an eye out for him, Ladybug was forced to admit she didn’t know. They had never revealed their identities to each other, made no contingencies to do so. If she had known Chat’s identity, she could have told everyone who he was—but if he had known hers, he would have had another way of defeating Ladybug.

When Ladybug asks to meet up with the trio, she tells them the story again and shows the account of the fight Alya has on the Ladyblog. They are still reluctant to believe the truth. They still think of him as their partner.

She asks them who he is. She knows they associate when they aren’t all wearing masks. She knows the American Dragon has a human form, knows Phantom can pass as human, knows the Ninja just needs to remove his mask to rejoin society, just as she does.

They all exchange glances.

None of them volunteer the information.

“He might be controlled,” the American Dragon points out. “This might just be a different form of magic. There’s…a lot of different kinds. Way more than just what you know with your kwamis. The Ninja deals with that kind of thing almost on a daily basis, and I’ve run into my fair share.”

“This has been going on for weeks. Would a spell last that long?”

“It would if it’s renewed,” the dragon replies.

“Or if the connection is just never broken in the first place,” adds the Ninja. “Like the Am Drag said, it depends on the kind of magic. What I’m used to? That would probably last if I didn’t stop it. I’ve seen animals controlled for a long time. Humans wouldn’t be much different.”

“Ghosts can possess people for ages, too,” Phantom puts in, “but there are some obvious tells with that, especially when the ghost in question doesn’t know the person they’re supposed to be impersonating very well.”

Ladybug thinks they won’t help her, and her desperation shows on her face. “We’ll check up on him,” the Ninja says. “Drop by for a surprise visit. See how things go.”

“He’ll know I told you.”

They looked at each other again. “We’ve been doing this for longer without him,” Phantom finally says. “He won’t be able to trap all of us, even knowing what we can do. We’ll find out what we can and report back to you.”

“If you find something,” she says, “don’t bother reporting back to me. Just stop him. I can find out the truth then.”

Danny winds up doing advanced scouting. He can’t identify anything terribly different in how Adrien is acting, so he finds Plagg. When he offers Plagg some camembert, Plagg looks devastated. He doesn’t take it. He also refuses to say anything, but that already tells Danny all he needs to know.

Something is definitely up.

They change their plans and decide to send Jake in alone with a story of being in town to meet up with the new French Dragon. Something about intercontinental relations in the magical community. Jake never did pay enough attention to that sort of thing, and Adrien would know that, so he figures the excuse will work.

Adrien doesn’t let on that he suspects anything out of the ordinary, easily deflects Jake’s tentative questions, and seems his usual self. He passes the few more subtle tests Jake manages to do to check for some sort of magical control, too—ghost possession included.

They decide not to take risks. They know how dangerous Adrien can be as Chat Noir and aren’t keen to battle their friend. The plan is for Danny to possess him, take him somewhere else, let him be tied up, and swallow what’s basically a truth potion brewed up by Fu before Danny stops overshadowing him.

That gets derailed the moment Danny runs into the ghost shield that blocks him from entering Adrien’s room.

That erases any lingering doubts they had. Adrien had planned for them even before he knew Jake was in town. Randy tries sneaking in instead, but he gets caught on the surveillance cameras Adrien never used to have pointed towards his bathroom window. He is dealt with as any intruder might be—burglars wear masks, too, after all—and he knows better than to say who he really is. Danny ends up breaking him out of prison while Jake uses his magic to impersonate Nathalie when they know she is out of the house.

Adrien’s father is the one to realize something is up. He wants to know why Nathalie is back already. Jake makes his apologies, saying he’d forgotten something, that it wouldn’t happen again and that he’d be quick about it— And then Gabriel says something that Jake later realizes is a reference to something. It is a test.

He fails it.

He just hadn’t realized he’d failed it at the time because he hadn’t realized Gabriel would know to test him, would know what he could do.

He hadn’t realized how much there was to this.

None of them had.

It isn’t until much later that he works it out. It isn’t until he finds himself on his hands and knees in a park, surrounded by grass pockmarked with chunks of ice and scorch marks and no idea how he got there, that he realizes what happened. The green shield in front of him drops as a flash of red passes over, erasing all the damage, and Jake looks up. He isn’t surprised to see the white butterfly flying away.

“I’m sorry,” he says to all of them. Then, to Ladybug, who had helped him to his feet, “I know what happened.”

Jake doesn’t know if it is just a ruse on Chat Noir’s part, doesn’t know if he is merely pretending to work with Hawk Moth to bring him down from the inside, doesn’t know if all of this has merely been a way to prove his loyalty to Hawk Moth and gain his trust before he makes his move to steal the Butterfly Miraculous—

But Jake does know why it might not be.

He does know what might have caused their friend to turn.

“Chat Noir is Adrien Agreste,” he says, “and Hawk Moth is his father.”

(That’s when they stop keeping secrets from each other. They’re more aware of the risks now, but they have a target—two targets—and Marinette fills in Master Fu. None of the trio wants a Miraculous for themselves—they’d rather stick with their own powers—so she recruits the other heroes, the ones who know how to use the powers they’ve been granted because they’ve helped before. They’re introduced to the trio only by their hero identities and vice versa, but they’re told the truth about Hawk Moth and Chat Noir. Queen Bee thinks they have it wrong—Gabriel would never endanger Adrien—and Carapace doesn’t want to believe that his best friend would ever betray them like this—especially Ladybug, since he knows how Adrien feels about her—and Rena Rouge hates the idea but doesn’t question its validity—because she’s realized that masks don’t need to be physical, and if Adrien has been Chat Noir all along, well, clearly he’s better at hiding behind one than she’d ever realized. “Sometimes you just don’t know a person as well as you think you do,” she says, and Ladybug swallows and starts to lay out a plan without meeting her eye.)

#secret quartet #miraculous ladybug #ml spoilers #danny phantom #adjl #rc9gn #fanfiction #fic ideas #my writing #snippets #ladylynse #asks #these are really fun to answer #thanks #pokibal2001

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akutagawaprize · 7 years

Note

You'll talk someday about how the Port Mafia is portrayed? ( not the bightest bulbs in the chandelier huh. Not the most subtle either) im not trying to rush you, it bothers me too and im just curious. I like your analysis. Have a nice day

Haha all kidding aside, I’ve been meaning to talk about them for quite a while now. It’s just that I want the stuff I write to make sense, because usually they’re self-indulgent rambles. And this one won’t be an exception, especially since I have so many feelings about Port Mafia.

Usually it’s the protagonists who are outmatched, outgunned, outnumbered, or just generally outclassed. Through sheer force of will and nakama power perfect teamwork do they come out on top. Even then sacrifices have to be made. At the start, the Armed Detective Agency seemed like it will follow this mold, but soon we are introduced to their abilities.

On paper and in practice, the abilities of the members of ADA greatly complement each other. This means that even with few active operatives who can work on the field, they got all bases covered. If this were an MMO they’d have Atsushi and Kenji as tanks, Atsushi again and then Kunikida for DPS, Tanizaki going for Assistance/Crowd Control, Fukuzawa as Buffer, Dazai as Debuffer and of course, Yosano as their Healer. Not to mention Ranpo, the formidable brains behind their operations (with Dazai as backup, or even vice versa).

Now let’s take a look at the mafia. Not counting Odasaku, in their group who doesn’t have an offensive ability? Ace? Sure, but his ability only applies to his subordinates, and anyway he’s also dead. See the problem? Chuuya probably has the most versatile ability in the mafia right now, but it’s either he takes great pride in his prowess as a martial artist or he just can’t think of creative ways to take advantage of the fact that he can, well, manipulate gravity. There’s also Elise, who seems to be “programmed” to be able to do feats no ordinary human can, but we don’t know much about her. Outside of these two, the one who impresses is Kajii. His ability sounded like a joke sure, but he knows how to make use of it and in the right circumstances, can be that one member to watch out for. There’s also talks about another executive member or two. Whether one exists we don’t know, but I can only hope they’ll possess an ability that is a supportive one, or something gamechanging like mind reading or memory wipe.

Don’t get me wrong! It is rather refreshing to see a team full of competent people, especially in their line of work where they’ll find themselves smack dab in the middle of dirty matters the police and the military would rather not handle. That they are well-rounded means it’s easy to imagine why the government would want their help, why they get the requests they do, and why they are favored to take on cases that will pit them against criminals/evildoers who have their own deadly abilities.

But at the same time, the agency members seem almost… overpowered. They have limits and restrictions, true, but these barely influence how they use their abilities. The times they get into action, the enemies have done absolutely nothing to counter them or anticipate their movements… which is a shame really! Heroes are only as good as the villains who oppose their ideologies and this time, Fyodor has Port Mafia beat in spades.

Imagine Chapter 47 with Tanizaki using Kunikida’s note (while he can materialize objects remotely we didn’t know if anybody else could activate it or if distance was gonna an issue, but this does not break previously established rules so it gets a pass) to materialize a switchblade. Wouldn’t it have been far more interesting if one of them saw the trap, retaliated, and then caught Tanizaki off-guard, causing him to use his illusion to play mind games, make them question each other, heck make them question their own senses. But we don’t see any of it, we just see Tanizaki tricking everyone and it’s frustrating to watch, especially since they are already aware of what Tanizaki can do and have taken no measures to ensure he won’t be able to pull the same trick twice.

You see this with Akutagawa and Chuuya too, both preferring brute strength over anything else. Would it have been too OOC to have a panel of Chuuya looking/glancing around, trying to eliminate any possibilities of a trap? I’m sure Ranpo would have succeeded in luring Chuuya regardless but no matter how hotblooded Chuuya is, he’s a mafia executive still! There should be an ounce of logic in that brain. If the one at the top is this hopeless, what about the others?

I wasn’t particularly affected by that scene in Episode 4/Chapter 5 where the ADA systematically wrecks Black Lizard and mops the floor with them because I knew they were the equivalent to Red Shirts despite being properly introduced and being called commanders of an elite fighting squad… Okay, okay, reading what I just typed and looking back, it does make you wonder whether the mafia’s full of jobbers like these guys or if the ones at the top are just much, much scarier. Akutagawa was beaten by an untrained and inexperienced Atsushi who had been with ADA in just, what, a month or two? Chuuya’s an executive who looks cool and has an ability that is even cooler, but stick him next to Dazai and he becomes a sheepdog who’s all bark and no bite. Let’s not forget how he can only activate the “true” form of his ability if Dazai’s there to cancel it or else his body will give up on him. Kouyou looks like she means business, but she goes soft for Kyouka. Despite saying she’d stay in the mafia to help run their organization, one couldn’t help but wonder based on her recent actions whether she’s having second thoughts. The Black Lizard… No comment. Higuchi… She’s a badass Muggle, but a Muggle nonetheless.

Mori? Now we’re talking. In episode 21/Chapter 30 we learn that the previous leader had gone delirious and started giving out illogical orders, resulting to confusion and punishing losses on the mafia’s side. Mori relieves the leader of his duty, with a young Dazai as the sole witness. Mori has ambitions, but the exchange also implies that if the leader hadn’t let things escalate to such a sorry state then Mori wouldn’t have needed to go that far. Remember, at the conclusion of the 3 Way War Arc, he gave Kouyou the option of staying or running away. He may be coolheaded, but he’s not coldblooded. All of the actions he takes are to ensure the continued survival of the mafia, which is why unless some other canon information comes out, I’ll choose to believe that until now Mori is wrestling with the idea of killing Dazai for good or letting him be. I won’t put it past Mori to think up of a plan to convince Dazai to go back willingly, even putting his life on the line. Just as he won’t kill Dazai, he’s sure Dazai won’t kill him because once that happens there will be no turning back. So as long as the chance of Dazai returning is not at 0%, Mori will keep Dazai alive until he is sure he won’t have any need for him in the future.

Moving on, this is all rather awkward, but one glaring weakness of Port Mafia right now is just how damn good Mori is at his job. His absence leaves such a vacuum that everything is thrown out of order. There is no one to assume command the same way he can; the successor he’d groomed has long jumped ship. All other candidates for his replacement are woefully inadequate and ill-prepared. It’s a fate which calls to mind those great conquerors whose kingdoms fell into ruin not too long after they have passed away. Again, this is probably why Mori had invited Dazai back even if he was the one who chased him out in the first place.The thing is, no one has shown awareness of this. There has been no talk about any fear for the future, about what would happen post-Mori. The way the mafia acts, they think they’re invincible, that the halcyon days would never come to an end. Never mind that the ADA and maybe even the police had cornered them with their backs pressed against the wall a few couple times. To maf members, their strength and number are enough; sense, caution and tactics can come later. Ironic, considering these are things Mori presumably values and holds in high regards.

The Port Mafia has no unifying goal, so to speak. Of course, the ultimate point of the mafia is to make money, with violence as a currency they are willing to spend on those who won’t bow their heads. It’s a choice of lifestyle for those who enjoy crime and the taste of power… for those who find it easier to be dishonest… and maybe those who simply have nowhere else to go back to like that kid who became Ace’s collared subordinate. The mafia is their home, but unlike with the ADA, they didn’t join to make friends or play house. Again, most of them are probably motivated by money. That’s why when Mori was incapacitated, they didn’t have the same desperation as ADA, even with Hirotsu saying they are fighting to prove their worth by protecting their boss.

Finally, while the Port Mafia are heralded as “wardens of the night” and are comfortable in monitoring and participating in underground dealings and criminal activities in Yokohama, outside of their jurisdiction they hold little power. They have no ties to other organizations, no allies to back them up. ADA can count on the government for support for example. Add to that, Lucy and Poe from the Guild are practically unofficial members now. So how about the mafia? Is it possible that other port cities like Kobe and Nagasaki have their own mafia, and are affiliated with Yokohama’s Port Mafia? What about international ties? Knowing Mori, they should have built up a network of clients and freelancers, ones the executives or the mafia’s Intelligence Division could have called upon once it was clear Mori was in grave danger and that the enemy knows mostly everyone in their organization. Outside help, one which the enemy wouldn’t have suspected, would have gone a long, long way and would have at least messed up some of ADA’s plans.

In wanting to give the heroes some spotlight, Asagiri-san has forgotten that the mafia has just as much as stake as the agency, but are not fighting like it. They are old dogs who won’t learn new tricks, while ADA has this “adapt or die” mindset. They have smartly split up into two groups (or 3, if you count Ranpo by himself) to explore all the options that could save Fukuzawa’s life. It’s probably this difference in their way of thinking that for a “rival organization”, the mafia has become bland and underwhelming.

scanlation credit: Dazai Scans, Easy Going Scans

#bungou stray dogs #port mafia #akutagawa ryunosuke #nakahara chuuya #mori ougai #everyone else #text #idk #asks

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becauseimsensational · 6 years

Text

Killing Eve rewatch: "I'll Deal With Him Later"

Of course, Eve remains as tangentially relatable as ever during her meeting with Carolyn: from the five seconds of awkward stuttering that seem to last five minutes because secondhand embarrassment is a REAL problem, to the point at which she explodes in her learned polite, British manner, Eve's frustration leaps off the screen and demands attention. I have to wonder how many times she's tried explaining this theory of hers to Niko, or to Bill and Elena, and how many times they'd tell her she was insane and grasping at straws. For once, someone is listening to her, believes her, and isn't calling her crazy. The line, "It's like I've stepped into my brain!" is massively important for both Eve and the audience. It shows Eve's intelligence and tenacity with these cases, but it also gives her a sense of agency and validates the extra secret work she'd put in at MI-5 that's now paying off. (Side note: God bless Phoebe Waller-Bridge for casting Fiona Shaw as Carolyn, because that line about the rat drinking from the can of Coke is so absurdly funny due to her deadpan delivery of it, and I'm not sure any other actress would've been able to do that line justice.) That whole scene is also a massive turning point, because Eve is finally allowed to investigate what she wants to, and she's got no boundaries or dickswab superiors telling her she can't.

I think one of the most endearing things about Villanelle is her sense of humor and the deadpan delivery of some of her answers. The exchange with Konstantin about the bruise on her eye is undeniably funny, but it's interesting that a hardened assassin uses humor to deflect any possible kernel of truth, even with someone she's so familiar with. The assessment scene is wickedly funny, too, in true Villanelle fashion. The line about the photo of the hanged man having "good legs" should not be funny, but somehow it is. Villanelle subverts all expectations, laughing at and making light of things that "ordinary" people should not—but don't we all know someone like that, who laughs at awfully morbid things? Who uses humor as a mask for their true feelings? (I personally use dark humor constantly to cover the trauma I experienced in the past, which may be informing my feelings toward the assessment scene, but I digress.) The appeal of using dark humor in stressful situations is a sense of control that I think most of us crave. It's a control that Villanelle certainly has—until Konstantin makes Jerome ask her about Anna and shows her the sketch of the woman. For me, there are two possibilities here: either she's lying and the woman is Anna, or she's lying and it is actually her mother.

Either would make sense, honestly. It's very easy to lie and bite out the first denial that comes to mind, even if it's just a direct reversal of what the other person said. At this point, the audience doesn't know who Anna is, but we can assume she was someone important to Villanelle, or she wouldn't have had such a hard time getting back to using humor to control the situation. I personally think Villanelle was, for once, being genuine when she said the woman was supposed to be her mother. It could make sense, given the fact that she keeps staring at older women with dark hair. It could be an unfulfilled maternal fantasy, or I could just be talking out of my ass and she was actually joking about it being her mom. Also, we don't know how long Konstantin had that sketch in his possession for, so it's unlikely the woman in the sketch is Eve. On the off-chance it is actually Eve (or Random London Hospital Woman, from Villanelle's pov), maybe Villanelle sketched it because her hair reminded her of Anna's. But who knows? That scene is still kind of ambiguous to me.

After the assessment when she hugs Konstantin, I sensed a bit of a disconnect. The hug looked inorganic, forced, and like it was a spur-of-the-moment thing she remembered that people do sometimes. This is definitely coming from beyond the constraints of just this episode, but I'd be willing to bet she's never hugged anyone without an ulterior motive. Ever. Call me crazy but Villanelle just doesn't seem like a hugger. Someone pointed out to me that Villanelle is very similar to an AI, a comparison I hate (because robots terrify me lol) but one that makes sense. She has no moral compass or ethical code, she's an efficient killing machine and, most interestingly, she mimics other people's behavior to fit in. I truly think she has no idea how to be a "normal" human, which explains the smiling battle with the little girl on the ice cream shop from episode one, the awkward way she hugs Konstantin, and then mimicking the laughter she hears on the radio when she's out with Sebastian.

Oh, Sebastian. Adorable, sweet, sensitive Sebastian. I actually was rooting for him to stay alive, but…well, we see how long that lasted. While the sex scene didn't come as a shock to me at all, the logistics of it were weirdly refreshing. For once, the woman was on top, in total control, and the man was begging for mercy. For once, the man was being used as a sexual object for the woman's gratification. I found myself audibly "aww-ing" for the fifth fucking time because I'm a sap when Sebastian assured Villanelle he'd never hurt her, while her hand was around his throat. Never one for sentimentality, Villanelle's cold, vacant eyes and flat affect tacitly told us all we needed to know: "This was fun, but I don't believe you. And I'm not going to let you get close enough to find out if you're lying."

The subtle recognition in Eve's eyes in the bathroom speaks to the nuance of Sandra Oh's acting. It's clearly just a passing remembrance, because I'm fairly certain the traumatic memory of walking into witness the carnage in that hospital room would outweigh a nurse in a bathroom, but for some reason the encounter stood out to Eve. She's almost constantly fiddling with her luxurious mane, and probably spends most of her time trying to keep it out of her face. And then a random beautiful young woman stares at her for a little too long, then tells her to "Wear it down," which may have been the first time anyone's ever told her that.

THE KILL: It might sound demented, but I think this one is my favorite. Villanelle is a master manipulator and knows exactly what to say to get Carla to smell her perfume. Not to mention all the preparation that went into that kill? Mixing that toxic perfume, having the correct outfit and wig, the "three weeks of catering training" she supposedly did, and the tampon in her pocket as an excuse to get to her target? She really thinks of everything when it comes to her job, and that's a determination I can support! (Well, mostly, I mean she is killing people…) But then there's the utter fascination in her eyes as she watches Madame De Mann die, slowly and excruciatingly. And then, of course, Villanelle makes it laugh-out-loud funny by grabbing the woman's hand and waving goodbye with it, once again using dark humor even though she's had control of the situation the whole time.

Yet again, Sebastian's the sweetest guy who didn't deserve what happened to him. He's not an idiot, of course he didn't believe that Konstantin was her brother. Not to mention he literally walked in on him choking her against the wall? His willingness to protect Villanelle (AKA "Julie") is adorable and noble, but it was his curiosity and desire to support her in her perfume business that got him in the end, poor guy. Also, Konstantin's lazy, half-assed "I'm her brother" never fails to crack me up, along with Villanelle's "Dealt with" when they find Sebastian's body. PWB's writing and Jodie Comer's delivery are the perfect match, I swear.

The final scene of both leading ladies trying to research the other has to be one of my favorites of the series. In a way, it's a little like the moment in You've Got Mail when Tom Hanks realizes the perpetual thorn in his side is the woman he's in love with—but Meg Ryan's still in the dark for the rest of the movie. The instant oh shit look on Villanelle's face is priceless. She's relaxing in bed after a glass of champagne, googling Eve's name to see what comes up, and then…it's her. She probably never thought she'd see Hospital Bathroom Woman again, but there she is! On her screen, and leading a department just for her; the cocky grin she had when Konstantin first told her is nowhere to be found. On Eve's end, she's poring over every photo of every nurse at that hospital; it's late, she should be home in bed, but she can't sleep until she finds a photo of the woman. When she doesn't, it finally connects: "I think I've met her."

Random observations:

-During the assessment, Villanelle speaks of her mother in the present tense: "I'm joking. My mother has really thin, shitty hair." To me, that line indicated that her mother's alive. (Because I've seen this show in its entirety four times already, this will definitely come up again later but for now it's just something to keep in mind)

-Frank's still a dickswab. God I can't wait until I get to watch him get murdered again

-Why national anthems? Of all the genres of music she could have thrown out, why that one? She was born in a post-Soviet Russia, so the anthem's been toned down a bit; also, Konstantin told Jerome that she doesn't speak Russian anymore, indicating a disconnect from her homeland. But the French national anthem? That makes a little more sense for Villanelle to like. It's defiant, it's triumphant, and damn it's violent. But just because you like one country's national anthem doesn't mean you like them all, and most of the rest of them are boring "I love my country" rhetoric that are sorely lacking the mentions of bloodshed that the French have. She's just a constant surprise, I guess lol

-Sebastian's got a dressform in his apartment, which I think is cool because hey, he did actually make his trousers like he said.

-Villanelle eats on screen, which is so refreshing for a female character. And they're not like important meals, it's snacking and eating junk food like real people do. (Yeah, the bar for women acting like humans on screen is that low)

-Who would I be if I didn't mention that infamous champagne cork pop?! The placement of the bottle right between Jodie's legs, and the fact that it explodes right after Villanelle says Eve's name? Iconic. There had to have been some deity that blessed that take because…wow, it was perfect. And totally unexpected and unscripted, as Jodie confirmed on twitter.

-Even in the photo Villanelle finds of her, Eve's got her hand in her hair, messing with it as usual. Maybe it's a manifestation of Eve's insecurities, either about her appearance (for which there is no reason, have you seen Sandra Oh?) or about herself generally.

-If you pause the screen while Villanelle's googling, some of the search results are hilarious!

The first one (from the not at all made up website 'powbangsmash.tv') advertises "Horrific Wrestling Accidents" featuring Polastri Pulverizer, which is just so random, even for a fake google search.

The second is about Niko who, apparently, tutors people in the world's most boring card game AND was the national champion in 1998, because of course Niko's really really good at really really mundane things.

The third mentions the origins of the Polastri family line which: "BEGAN IN THE 1880S WITH ERIC POLASTRI, WHO HAD THREE WIVES EACH NAMED JANE" which is just bizarre

The fourth one, my favorite, is a One Direction Fan Fiction called "A Hallow's Eve in the wrong direction" from the site 'fanfictionsandhomemadetales.org' which, sadly, doesn't actually exist. (Yes I did look that one up)

The last one is about a house fire and how the dad saved the family's puppy, named Eve. Pets with human names will never not be funny to me, and Eve is just so odd-sounding for an animal.

#yay time for more rambling!#welcome to the inside of my brain for the past hour and a half #yea i know the episodes are only 45 minutes tops but i have a LOT of thoughts to weed through and edit lmao #Killing Eve s1e2 #lmfao i know that literally no one else is going to read this unfounded and completely unhinged psychoanalysis but like…#idgaf really i just want somewhere to vent about how spectacular this show is #phoebe waller bridge is a goddamn genius and id compromise whatever morals i might still be clinging to just to be on the same continent #its so hard not to draw parallels from later episodes since ive seen it already lol

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