#yes i posted this a few days ago but as usual tags are fucked up <333

[mimsynims]

Fool For Love

part 9

~~~

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8

~~~

Author’s Note: Aaand it’s finally done! I always have trouble wrapping up a story, and this one was no exception… but I hope you’ll enjoy it!

This will be posted at AO3 at some point. (In fact, if I write more BG3 fics I’ll probably post it on AO3 instead of Tumblr, as usual. And I do have a few ideas actually…👀)

Thank you all for the likes, reblogs, and comments <3 it has definitely helped me keep going!

~~~

Astarion x reader/Tav

Tags: (mildish?) angst, pining, pining while fucking, jealousy, minor Karlach/Dammon, finally a happy ending for these two knuckleheads

Summary: You thought you knew what you were doing when you let Astarion into your bed. He doesn’t have feelings for you, and vice versa. Only…now you do.

To begin with, you didn’t handle it well. You tried moving on, and that seemed to work. At least you told yourself that it did.

Then something happened that gave you hope. Perhaps he feels something for you too, after all?

~~~

You find him on the path close to the archway, in almost the same spot where you talked to Bex mere days ago. You take a moment to study him from afar. It’s hard to be sure when there’s nothing but the light from the moon illuminating him, but you think his shoulders look tense. Is this your doing?

You wish you could hug him, offer to him relax in your arms.

“I’m afraid your personal blood bank will be closed for a while,” you joke as you walk closer, hoping it will lighten his mood. “For restocking purposes.”

Astarion doesn’t turn around, and when he remains silent for several tension-filled seconds, you wonder if your quip was a mistake.

“Did you mean it?” he finally asks.

The question takes you by surprise and try as you might, you can’t figure out what he’s talking about. “I’m sorry?”

“You said that you’d do anything for me. Did you mean it?”

Oh. That. “Yes.”

Your heart starts pounding as he shifts to look at you. Silvery beams of moonlight caress his beautiful face, a face painted with apprehension — and possibly hope.

“And what does that mean?”

“What do you want it to mean?” you ask in return, because you’re not ready to say those three little words. Not yet.

“Nice try, Tav.” His jaw tightening, Astarion suddenly looks closed off. “If you’re going to play coy with me you might as well leave.”

With that, he turns away from you again — and it feels like a stab to the heart. “It means,” you amend quickly, “that I care for you.” You’ve never been good at expressing your emotions. Never been good at opening yourself up to other people. And it’s scary to do so now. “Deeply.”

Astarion scoffs. “I bet you said that to Gale too,” he says, and the bitterness in his voice stings.

“I– what are you talking about?”

“I saw you. You went to him.”

Acting without thought, you rush forward to place yourself in front of him to make sure that he looks at you; he needs to fully understand what you say next. “It wasn't like that, we only talked. Astarion, you’re special to me.”

You steel yourself for another cutting remark, but you’re helpless against the sad expression that replaces the anger. “So special that you decided to end things between us?”

Fool. You’ve been a fool. “I ended things because I didn’t think…” Taking a deep breath, you tell yourself to be honest. “I did it because I was jealous and I couldn’t handle the possibility of you breaking my heart.”

His brow twitches in confusion. “You were jealous? Of who?”

You desperately ache to touch him, but you hold yourself back. “Shadowheart. Halsin. Anyone that I thought was sharing your bed besides me.”

“Tav. Darling.” He sounds exasperated but hearing the endearment again sparks tingles of joy and hope inside your chest. “I haven't invited anyone to my bed since we started sleeping together.”

Oh. Oh. “Really?”

“Yes, really.” For the first time since you found him, a small smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. “I thought you knew that.”

“No. No, I didn’t.” To say that you’ve been an idiot is an understatement. You’ve let yourself see things that aren’t there because you are insecure. “I haven’t either, you know. Been with anyone else since you.”

The smile twists into something teasing and sultry that feels more like Astarion. “Is that so?”

“It is, and I honestly can’t believe you’d think anything different.” It’s true. While you wouldn’t call yourself unattractive, you’ve never really been one to draw the attention of potential lovers. You’ve had a few before Astarion of course, but in general, people have been more inclined to remain your friend rather than try to pursue something more. “You wouldn’t have looked twice at me if you had seen me on the streets of Baldur’s Gate.”

“Now that is just untrue, my dear Tav.” He reaches for your hand, taking it in his. “As you so bluntly pointed out that night, my motives for seducing you may partly have been driven by self-preservation, but I chose you for a reason — and not because you're our reluctant leader.”

His slender fingers grip you tighter and the touch is exactly what you need just then. “Is that so?” you echo, attempting to sound teasing. You fail spectacularly.

“I was drawn to you even before I started to develop feelings for you.” Lifting your hand, he presses a lingering kiss on the sensitive skin of your palm before resting it against his cheek. “At first, I thought it was the need for your body that kept you in my thoughts night and day. But as I got to know you better, I realised it was your mind — you — that held my attention.” Closing his eyes, he leans into the touch with a sigh. “What Cazador had me do… It taught me how to read people. But you…?” He opens his eyes again to look at you, and what you see makes your heart skip a beat. “I thought I had you figured out, but you continuously prove me wrong. And I appreciate that more than I can express.”

“Astarion.” There’s so much you want to say. So much you need to say. But in that moment, you finally find the courage to tell him what you should’ve told him weeks ago, so the rest will just have to wait. “Astarion, I love you.”

His eyes widen in surprise as something vulnerable flashes across his face. After five heartbeats — you know, because you counted — he lets go of your hand to gently cup your neck.

The kiss is soft and gentle. Careful. In a way, it feels like a first kiss.

“Why didn’t you tell me that instead of breaking up with me?” He kisses you again before you can reply. “There you go again, doing the unexpected.”

You don’t even try to hold back a smile. “Have to keep you on your toes, you know. And I didn’t tell you because I wasn’t sure it would be welcomed, you silly goose.” To your surprise, it no longer hurts as much thinking back to that night. “First you disappeared and then when I found you, you were sitting between Halsin and Shadowheart.”

“My my, were you jealous, darling?” he drawls in mock surprise. The bastard.

“Of course I was!” You very carefully wrap your arms around his waist, ignoring the ache from your injury. Because you need to feel him against you, pain be damned. “Why do you think I gave Gale so much attention?”

“And got yourself decadently drunk, too. It was a glorious sight.”

“Oh shush, you.” Despite yourself, you laugh.

“I have to apologise, though, my darling. I, too, was jealous.” His breath is warm against your cheek as he leans forward to rest his forehead against yours. “I could tell something was troubling you, but you kept being so elusive. I assumed… I thought that meant you only deemed me worthy of getting access to your body, and nothing more.”

“Astarion.” The sincerity and sorrow permeating his words make you feel like a villain. “Gods, I’m so sorry, too. At the time, I didn’t think you’d be interested in anything else.”

“I want anything and everything you give me, Tav.” You feel his fingers slide down your uninjured side, gripping you as firmly as he dares to. Lifting his head to get a better look at you, his eyes lock with yours. “I love you, with everything that I am.”

You can see the truth of it in his gaze, can feel it in his touch. He loves you. Was it always there and you were just blind to it? Or did he hide his feelings, just like you did?

It doesn’t matter, you decide, because all you need to know is that he’s in your arms.

“You have all of me, Astarion.”

“My beautiful Tav.”

You share another kiss, and then Astarion insists you both go back to camp to let you rest. The thrumming pain of the wound is there, but it’s easily overshadowed by the warmth blooming in your chest every time Astarion throws a smile your way on your way back. His hand is still linked with yours — it’s such a small detail but it feels infinitely more intimate than anything else you’ve shared with him so far. It’s impossible to stop smiling — not that you’re trying.

He follows you to your tent but to your dismay, he tries to leave after he has made sure that you have everything you need.

“Please don’t leave,” you say, refusing to let go of him. “I want you to stay. Stay the night.”

“Tav, my love, you’re in no condition to have sex.”

My love. It almost throws you off course to hear the new endearment. “Astarion, my love,” you counter, and oh, it’s worth it to see his reaction, “I wasn’t suggesting we’d have sex. I just want you close. Assuming that’s alright, of course.”

“Really?” He sounds just a tad surprised; that’s something you and he will need to unpack before going any further. But not tonight. “Well, that I can do.”

It takes a bit of careful shuffling around, but you manage to find a position that’s comfortable for you both without putting pressure on your injury.

He’s here. In your arms. You didn’t think you’d get to have this, but he truly is here. Your contented sigh is nothing but a muffled exhale into his curls but he doesn’t seem to mind, giving you a fond chuckle in response.

“Are you sniffing my hair, darling?”

“No.” It doesn’t sound convincing even to your own ears. “Well. Maybe a little,” you confess. “I can’t help that you smell nice.”

“Oh, I don’t mind, pet. Your scent is quite enticing too, you know.” You feel his chest expanding as he takes a deep inhale. “Drives me crazy sometimes.”

“Since you drive me crazy on a regular basis, I’d say that’s only fair.”

“Why, you little cheek..! Just watch me be even more annoying from now on.”

“You’re not annoying,” you say, trying to hold back a yawn. “You’re just a handful.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Of course–“ you lose the battle against another yawn. “…you will.”

You feel the press of his lips against your skin. “Quite right.”

“Astarion?” Your eyelids start to get heavy, and for the first in what seems like ages, you feel completely safe and relaxed. “I’m so happy I have you in my life.”

“Me too, darling. Me too.” His hand slides down to find yours, lacing your fingers. “Now go to sleep, my love. I’ll watch over us. And tomorrow we will face whatever comes next. Together.”

~~~

#astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #bg3 fanfiction #bg3 fic #bg3 tav #bg3 astarion #bg3 spoilers #no longer a wip because it’s finisheeeeed

[brisquad-unit-4402]

hihi may i request number 37 for kyo for the 100 followers thing!! congrats btw :3

Maybe kyo said something sweet to the reader but feels embarrassed afterwards,?

damn. i rlly didn’t write this until the very last day of his life huh. my condolences on our oshi. but still! send him off strong and happy and be sure to celebrate both the times you've had and the ones he's about to invite after he graduates!

tags: pre-relationship, fluff, gender neutral reader, teasing

#100 followers for 4402 - 37. embarrassed

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Something in Kyo’s gene pool made his height spring up nearly overnight. You’d even be happy for him—

“How’s the weather down there?”

—If he didn’t rub it in your face any chance he got.

It’s karma. You were taller than him just a few weeks ago and watching him react to you poking fun at his height is what kept you going. Now he towers over you (nothing to be ashamed of) and leans down while he speaks (everything to be ashamed of).

You scoff and roll with the punches. “Nice and shady while your beanstalk ass stares directly into the sun.”

“Nah, I’m having the time of my life up here,” Kyo says. You walk side by side with him, and now that today's classes at the Institute are over, it's at your own pace, without any of the rush of the school day. “Is this what it’s like to be the tall one?”

“Something like that. If I knew you would be this obnoxious about growth spurts, I would’ve told the moon to pick someone else.” You poke him. “Should’ve made me even taller than you.”

“You wish, being shorter suits you. It's cute.”

“You saying I’m cute?”

Kyo is quick to retort whenever any of your friends insinuate anything around him, but as his mouth opens, no sound comes out. His lips are slightly parted.

"You are!" You bump up against his arm to bring his guard down. "Aww, I had no idea you thought of me like that. You're not an asshole like you insist, are you?"

"Fuck off. I'm talking about your height, not you."

"Same thing! Besides, didn't you hate being called cute when you were smaller than me?"

"Woah, this isn't about me."

"Exactly." You smirk. "You want me to call you cute too?"

He doesn't say anything to that either, so between your footfalls, you look right up at him and his stupid height, ready to banter right back at whatever he says next.

What isn't expected is how he stares straight ahead, too focused on something that doesn't exist to watch you. The dyed streaks in his hair, usually tucked behind his ear, hang in front of his face instead, as if the pink would suggest the color over his face as a trick of a light.

When was the last time Kyo was speechless like this? You can't recall any of your other friends winning over no matter how they tried pushing his buttons. Perhaps he's the type that can dish it out but can't take it—after all, you're the only one in the Institute that can go toe-to-toe with him and his biting wit.

Curious to test the hypothesis, you bump up to him again. "You aren't denying it."

He tilts his head away, but now there's no mistaking the blush as anything else, just as bright as his hair along his cheek and over the corners of his ears, and a grumble under his breath you can't understand.

"Sorry, can't hear you, speak up please?" You tease, feigning innocence.

Kyo's brows scrunch together as he snaps his head to you, but despite the height and the many conversations you've had with him, he looks smaller than ever. "I said fine. You're cute. Happy now?"

Now it's your turn to forget how to speak, but luckily, you recover faster than he ever did. "Yes, actually."

"Great."

The pathway goes from pavement to dirt, and the crunching gravel under your shoes takes up the space your words can't fill. A tiny feeling of victory spreads through you.

"Are you embarrassed?" You ask.

"No," he says.

Neither of you buy it.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

✧. ┊ event post ✧. ┊ masterpost ✧. ┊ kofi

#kyo kaneko #kyo kaneko x reader #iluna x reader #iluna #nijisanji en #nijisanji x reader #kyo kaneko fluff #4402 writes #100 followers for 4402 #damn. i should've written him more when i had the chance

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Hello my maggots (especially the tumblr maggots whom I haven't seen on Discord recently), I've missed you so much and I'm sorry I haven't been posting the past few days.

It appears I used up all my XP in being a Funny Little Guy and left none for health (I'm not a gamer. I don't know why I tried that joke. The most experience I have with XP is learning Italian on Duolingo).

And I'll probably be taking a break for a few days more. Why?

Well, no, unfortunately, not love.

It's that stupid motherfucker, Tommy the Haematoma of my ankle.

But Asmi, you ask, didn't you fall down the stairs more than a month ago?

Why yes, yes I did. And out of that, two weeks were spent in bedrest/floorrest/whatever you call not being allowed to walk at all.

But thanks to the wonders of our Lord and Saviour Bildaddy, I am now resigned to two more weeks of bedrest.

WELL FUCK YOU TOO, BILDADDY. TO THINK I USED TO HAVE FAITH IN YOU.

But yes. A bloody fracture would have healed sooner than this. But no no no not Tommy and his buddies called weakened and swollen ligaments and heightened nerve sensation (not as catchy as Tommy, are they?) who are here to overstay their welcome like a couple of Indian aunties dropping in during festival time to gossip.

Now, I'm not someone who exercises, okay. Au contraire. I'm more sedentary than the coins that Crowley superglues to pavements.

But I did like being able to at least walk around my room to pick up my art supplies. Or go to the kitchen for a snack without maneuvering a cane (Kaz Brekker era coming up for realsies) (but less sexy and more legless chicken style). I also now can't really go outside unless I'm staying in the car. The car hurts, too. So I have only attempted that once. All hail.

So that is how I have come to be resigned to spending two more weeks (after already spending two) in bedrest and pain during the month before my birthday in the year 2024 of our Lord and Saviour Bastard and Damner Bildaddy.

It does tend to lower morale a bit. And I'm kind of active on the Discord server (I need to be, because otherwise my social interaction comes to a grand net total of 0) (just like the number of times Crowley and Aziraphale talked after Season 2) (ahaha sorry).

But being on Tumblr I feel like I should be making posts and I start getting stressy about notes even though I know I shouldn't. And thus my absence the past few days, and probably for a few days more.

C'est la vie. So it is farewell for now (I say dramatically about a few days break).

But don't worry my maggoty loves, I shall return with chaos. As usual. And I'll still be on Discord unless the pain gets really bad. I love love love love love you so much.

At the end of 2023 I wished so bad that I wouldn't be alone anymore and now I'm not. And so neither are any of you. Like that meme said, we're not a fandom, we're a deeply unwell family. Applies both to the Good Omens fandom and to my own. My fans are rather more incestuous, but that's part of our, er, charm.

Sending you all the hugs and forehead kisses and love that you're okay with. I'll see you soon.

Meanwhile, I want you to promise to cause chaos on my behalf. Keep the Good Omens tag trending. Make cursed headcanons. Try not to murder anyone. Byebye, my little maggoty fly larvae.

#good omens #good omens fandom #good omens mascot #weirdly specific but ok #asmi #maggots #crowley #bildaddy #the little fuck #life update #taking a break #fuck you tommy #i love you maggots #why? love. #neil gaiman

[insanityandstars]

The ramblings of a dying adolescence

(yes.. that is taken from a current joys song title) tw: slight mentions of hospitals, nurses, drips - but this is under the scream/stuilly tag so.. you probably expect things like this

Silly scream ideas (1996) P.3

I feel like Stu had his share of near death experiences,it's usually a 50/50 bet wether it was by his own hands or not. It would be unknown to anyone but Billy and maybe on occasion Randy, but it would leak through to Dewey through obviously his job, then to Tatum and then Tatum would tell Sid.

But either way, Billy would always be first to know and first to visit him, he'd probably put it off for a day or two before actually going, to prepare himself- not like.. cuz he'd be sad? But because he'd 100% insult the shit out of stu if he didn't take a moment to recollect himself.

Stu absolutely adores when Billy did let an insult or two slip because Billy would have this - though very faint and somewhat played off, still there - tone of worry

Back to the title of this-- Stu would absolutely talk up a fucking storm, if he's conscious, on the way to the hospital? Rambling to the medics or his parents, getting prepped for a room? Ramble to the nurses. Taken to a room? Continue.. getting bandaged or having the drips n shit put in? Rambleeeee..... Semi-asleep? Mumble absolute bullshit to the night nurse. Friends visit? Talk their heads off, some psyche worker comes round? Don't shut up

It's not much different from his usual self but it would definitely be hightened because he always gains this post-near death-clarity and starts talking about ideas or things he just thought of or that he had forgotten long ago. Once he gets back home, he definitely fills up an entire notebook with random bullshit during the next few days

#scream #scream 1996 #billy loomis #stu macher #skeet ulrich #tatum riley #dewey riley #sidney prescott #mathew lillard #stuilly #stu x billy #billy x stu #Silly scream ideas

[deedala]

🌱Macy's Tag Game Twosday🌿 (x2 actually because i have some other tag games i need to catch up on and im mashing them all togther in one post) so thank you for tagging me to play one or more of these following tag games!! @celestialmickey @crossmydna @mmmichyyy @creepkinginc @lingy910y @energievie @suzy-queued @metalheadmickey @mickeysgaymom @ardent-fox @m4ndysk4nkovich @rereadanon @mikhailoisbaby @tanktopgallavich @scurvgirl 💖💖💖 name: deanna🌱

your birthday: Nov 17

where in the world are you? O Hi O 🌽

when did you join tumblr? 2011

do you have any sideblogs? yeah not very active though

mobile or desktop? both both both

your perfect sleeping conditions: 70 degrees, flannel comforter, face mask and bonnet, cozy sweatshirt and socks. Yes i sleep in fuzzy socks dont at me.

a movie you think everyone should see at least once: hmmm... The Fall (2006)

what shoes do you wear the most often? slip on sneakers

describe your keys to me: key to my house with a pink cover, key to my parents house with no cover, my car key, my husbands spare car key, a loop wrist strap made from a piece of a limited run woven baby wrap design that was dedicated to the FB babywearing group i helped found like 8 million years ago, and my red wallet attached by TWO carabiners because listen you just never know when you'll need a second carabiner. Also i have a picture of my kids in the little wallet window where you're supposed to put your ID (ig?) 😊

find the book closest to you. turn to page 7. what’s the 7th word? "was"

what’s your favorite snack? popcorn

one of your aspirations: inner peace

and finally, tell me a random fact about yourself: ive been white water rafting a few times. as a youth...i dont think i'd ever go again though lol

rest of the tag games under the cut!

next up this picrew

(i need a fucking hair cut)

Favorites Collage: (as always my favorites change based on mood and day but these are pretty common favorites!!)

animal: house finch movie: The Fall (2006) season: autumn character: today right now its Mickey color: mint hobby: vidja gams book: The Masked Empire by Patrick Weekes song: The Boxer by Simon and Garfunkel drink: lemonade

and finally... this or that? ABO or Soulmates // fake dating or secret dating // fix-it or post-canon // mutual pining or friends-to-lovers // slow burn or angst // smut or romance // Reality TV au or Porn au //Enemies to lovers or Enemies to friends to lovers // Domestic Fluff or Hurt/Comfort // Coffee Shop au or College au // one-shot or multi-chapter // Crossover or canon compliant // mpreg or adoption // online romance or workplace romance // single parent au or sports au // neighbours or roommates // sci-fi au or magic au i was thinking of picking fix-it..but i think the fix-it type things i usually end up reading fall more under AU canon divergent rather than what is probably simply fix-it. also excuse me but smut IS romantic imo lolol. also also slow burn tends to be angsty so i felt like i could secretly pick both of those by picking slow burn haha.

and okay time to tag some nuggets to do any or all of these games!! 😆 Everyone up top + @harrowhark-a-vagrant @michellemisfit @too-schoolforcool @juliakayyy @heymrspatel @gallawitchxx @callivich @thepupperino @transmickey @grumble-fish @gardenerian @imikhailo @jrooc @milkmaidovich @grossmickey @sleepyfacetoughguy @themarchg1rl @sickness-health-all-that-shit @babygirlmickey @sweetbee78 @xninetiestrendx @vintagelacerosette @purplemagpie @squidyyy23 @sirrudo @alihendrjx + anyone else seeing this and wanting to play a thing 😋

#tag game tuesday #tag game #picrew

[fangirleaconmigo]

I am feeling all kinds of stuff tonight. So I'm taking a break from my regularly scheduled fandom programming and bringing you this, my post ,as a feminist, about trans rights. I feel like with all the shit going on right now, it's good to let people know where you stand, damn the consequences.

Alright.

Those of you who follow me know that I lost a dear friend to suicide a few weeks ago. She was a caring, kind human being, and a butch lesbian woman.

I was just sitting here tonight going through all of the facebook posts she ever tagged me in, just crying again and missing her. And I came across one very very long post she made a few years ago that I had completely forgotten about.

One day in 2017 she poured out her heart about being kicked out of a women's restroom at the Y again. She was very tall and athletic and had short hair, and this was not the first time it had happened to her.

Her post is lengthy and the heartbreak she felt being rejected from womanhood for her 'unfeminine' appearance is so visceral and so painful. She had experienced an intense amount of violent gender based and homophobic abuse in her life. She felt a deep, deep connection with her womanhood and with other women.

If you've read my other posts about her, you know that she liked to call her woman friends "warrior women" and have "yaya sisterhood" bonfire parties at her house. She always built us up. She gave a shit about other women, so sincerely.

So to see her pain again about this, about the way that she was constantly being 'defined out of' woman hood and treated as a predator made me enraged all over again.

I don't get involved in arguments online if I can at all help it (you all have noticed that I'm sure, I'm here to have a good time). But please let me share something personal here for a moment. If you follow me and were ever curious about where I stand, (being a feminist online during these horrible times) here it is.

Transphobia. Hurts. All. Women. Transphobia. Is. Not. Feminism. Transphobia is hate.

Mari is not the only butch friend I have who has been treated like a predator, kicked out of bathrooms, and been treated as an outsider to woman hood for visibly 'failing' a visual femininity test. It is such a stab to the gut to be rejected by your own people.

Yes, she was a cis woman. But she was still rejected by those who define women down to 'femininity' and 'clocking' as a woman, and being small and dainty and shit. She suffered from that. We all fucking suffer from that. I have another butch queer friend who this happens to. She gets kicked out of bathrooms. It's never happened when I'm there, which is probably better for everyone, because I get so enraged on her behalf just hearing about it. I'm a deeply nonviolent person but in person, I don't know what I'd do.

So let us be clear. All of the anti-trans bullshit going on, all the transphobia going absolutely bonkers online right now, makes literally all of this even worse and more hostile for women. All women.

For as long as we require women to 'clock' as uber feminine, for as long as we police women's genitalia when they walk into a restroom, for as long as we make queer women feel like predators for not conforming to social pressures of femininity, WE WILL BE ABUSING OURSELVES. WE WILL BE POISONING OURSELVES TO FIT IN WITH THE CONSERVATIVE, TRADITIONAL, HOMOPHOBIC MAINSTREAM WHO FUCKING HATES US.

Let me say that again, so this is clear. THEY FUCKING HATE US.

I don't give a shit what they say about feminism. "Oh, we are here to protect you from trans women"

Shut the ENTIRE fuck up. Just stop. I've lived on this earth as a woman for 46 goddamned years. You cannot pee on my leg and tell me it's goddamned raining.

Every time I've been politically disenfranchised, oppressed, underestimated, exploited, IT HAS BEEN BY THE RIGHT WING POLITICAL ESTABLISHMENT. IT HAS BEEN BY MISOGYNISTIC CISHET MEN AND THEIR HELPMATES, USUALLY CISHET UPPER CLASS WHITE CHRISTIAN WOMEN.

The thing that oppresses women are the systems and cultures of misogyny. Are you telling me trans women built those? lmaooooooooooooo get the entire fuck out.

They always say...oh, trans women can't be women because of the 'female experience'. So let this experienced female tell you that I fucking see you. I see you lying through your teeth about suddenly giving a shit about us.

I see you.

Young cis women, budding feminists. Do not let these people tell you that it's feminist to reject trans women. Do not let them say it's feminist to lament trans men and the 'loss' that purportedly represents to womanhood. Fuck that. It isn't feminism. It regressive. It's bigotry.

Do you not see how, every fucking time they talk about trans women they bring up rape?

Why? Ask yourself why?

Are trans women more likely to rape? No. Statistically, factually, they are most likely to be raped.

Is there some fuckn loophole somewhere that says trans women can legally rape people? And we gotta do something about that?

NO! In fact, in the US, it's functionally legal to assault and even kill trans women. These dudes are always fucking getting away with it, they just have to claim they were 'surprised' or some shit.

So then why do they always bring up rape?

Because they are trying to create an association between trans women and predatory behavior. To vilify them. As a Mexican American woman let me tell you that this is EXACTLY like when Trump brought up Mexican people EVERY FUCKN TIME he immediately brought up rape and drugs.

It's creating a connection in the minds of your audience. It is a process of hate. It is a process of dehumanization. And what does it directly precede? An oppressive action. They do it when they want to persecute a group of people and they don't want anyone to stop them.

It's hate and it should chill you to your core. They are out there killing these women! They are abusing and killing trans women, and trying to make you hate them so they can accrue even more clout and power. If you claim to be a decent human being, I'm gonna need you to give a fuck about that.

Then they act like they do it out of feminism.

They say...oh, we support women being 'unfeminine'. Trans men, for example, should just be butches and not trans their genders...

Oh fuck you. I was there. I was called every name in the book for not being feminine enough. It was right wingers who told me I should have been born a man. That I needed to change. To conform.

And now these same people are saying...oh we're on your side. We think we should get rid of gender stereotypes, not have all this trans-ness going.

Fuck you, you don't care about gender stereotypes.

Kids, never, ever, ever, ever trust someone who allies with alt right, far right, homophobic conservatives. They don't care about you. They aren't feminist.

Every election period I am reminded of who my sisters are. My cishet so called sisters who vote right wing with their husbands and ally with their whiteness and their class are not my fucking sisters. (I'm American, but I know this isn't unique to us)

If you support autonomy for women, and I mean ALL women, then you are my sister (or brother, or sibling, I claim you, I fuck with you is what I'm saying). If you lift up other women, the way my friend Mari did, then I claim you.

But if you claim to believe in improving the lives of all women, then that simply must include trans women.

Your so called feminism simply cannot include mocking women for looking masculine. It simply cannot include defining women by their genitalia. It simply cannot include policing women's genitalia or child rearing capacity.

They say...oh define women. Give us a definition then. You lose because you can't define women.

Fuck you.

I don't need to define women. I just need to love women, to be in solidarity with women. And I do. I support us. I volunteer for Planned Parenthood. I give money to pro-choice women who run for office. (again, women who support women) My home stays open to women leaving abusive relationships. I've housed at least five women over the past five years. I don't talk about it online because that's not why I do it. I do it because we need to stick together. So that's what I do. I march. I care. I give a shit.

And I appreciate anyone who stands with us of any gender you've got. Men? Awesome, stand right here. You've got a new gender? Fucking awesome. Stand right here. Hold this sign.

And as for trans women?

They are trying to legislate trans women's rights to medical procedures, to access to their own bodies.

I know what that's like.

They want to humiliate trans women for not meeting this high standard of 'feminine'

Shit, I know that what that's like too.

They want to define trans women by their internal organs and demean them for not functioning as a womb?

Me too, sister.

The thing is, I believe in trans women. In all trans people. Do you seriously fucking think that seven billion unruly human goddamn beings can (or should) neatly fit into ONE OF TWO FUCKING BOXES AND STAY THERE OBEDIENTLY NO MATTER WHAT THEIR OWN COMFORT AND HAPPINESS DICTATES? That's the most implausible, deranged thing I've ever heard.

Gender and social roles exist to serve humans. NOT the other way around.

I will always believe this. Human well-being first. Human dignity first. Social roles if they help, if they fit, if people like them. If not, chuck em.

So, yeah. I know this is a fandom blog. But I'm sitting here reading my friend's pain posthumously and I'm so angry. I'm just so angry.

How do I wrap this up? I don't know. I don't know everything. I'm not an expert or a scientist. I'm an Old and I have to google half the words I see online that people use when they talk about their gender or sexual orientation. (I've learned a lot these past few years on here!) So I'm not the expert. I don't understand it all. (who does??? LITerally NO ONE). I've made mistakes, I'll keep making mistakes. Unproblematic? I don't know her. No one does. Our asses are all problematic.

I just know that I give a shit about people, that I care about my fellow women, and that is literally all you have to do. And anyone who harasses, abuses, or just makes their lives miserable in general is on my shit list.

So yeah. Trans rights, folks. And feminists? If your feminism includes genitalia checks, it's not feminism it's fucking bigotry.

Thanks for reading x

#transphobia #feminism #random irl post #getting to know me i guess #had to get this off my chest #long post #remembering mari #tw: suicide #suicide

[ikissjesse]

could you do some aaron t/aaron z headcanons pls!

omg yes ofc !! ty for the request <333 since 3 ppl requested aaron² hc's (nothing specific) im gonna put all ur requests into this once post !!

tags: @i-need-a-slurpee @hrts4ariana ( note as of writing: this was a draft from 1719817282 years ago so if u forgot abt this n no longer wanted to be tagged im sorry🥲 )

as i mentioned in this post, they both adore musicals, especially hamilton

aaron² hc's !!

reblogs appreciated + reqs open <3

they like listening to the soundtracks together when they hangout

sometimes when there's a musical near where they are on tour they go together in their free time

u didn't hear it from me but they held hands during one of these musicals bc the room was dark n they thought noone would notice

as bros, ofc.. homies hold hands during musicals !!

they totally sing non-stop from hamilton together its cannon bc i say so

anyway enough abt hamilton for now

there was def mutual pining

they were both like "fuckidishcoaoxjaoa he just thinks of me as a friend"

"friend" NO HE WANTS U SO BAD -God probably idk

the way they attempted to "drop hints":

t tried to make z laugh a lot, even more than he usually did

pranks became less extreme than they normally were, he wanted to surprise him, not scare him to death like he used to

z would, although he denies this, try to do basketball tricks to impress t whenever he is at the basketball court w him

both of them went to jesse for advice, not knowing the other was doing the same

"hey jesse uhm- what should i do if, theoretically, ihavearlybigcrushonsomeonewhoiveknownforawhilebutithinktheyseemeasafriendandireallyreallyREALLYwannabemorebutidontwannaruinourfriendship????" -t

"...what?" -jesse

needless to say jesse was confused as hell

he sent him off w some advice after t slowed down enough for him to understand, then about 15 minutes later z came rambling about the same thing

"JESSE YOU'RE A HIT WITH THE LADIES, AND THE GAYS, AND..BASICALLY ANYONE. HOW DO I FLIRT WITH SOMEONE IVE KNOWN FOR AGES WHO IM PRETTY SURE SEES ME AS JUST A FRIEND?????" -z

thats what made it click for jesse, n he just laughed at the realization

giving him the same advice he gave t, he snickered at the idea of the aarons having a crush on eachother but being too stupid blind to see the feelings were mutual

"thanks jess!!" -z to jesse, running off

"yeah no problem man hehehshshehsh goodluck! HEHEHHEHE"

building up as much courage as he could, z eventually made the first move a few days later

he asked t if he'd like to join him for a musical that would take place at a nearby theater, n he gladly accepted

little did t know where this would lead <33 achoo anyways

as the lights dimmed during a 'romantic' scene, aaron z took t's hand in his own n (quietly) confessed his feelings towards his long-time bestfriend

saying t was happy would be an understatement

the energetic boy yanked him into a hug, leaving his stoic counterpart(ner) highly confused and extremely flustered

choking from t's tight embrace, his face became beet red

"Im, uhm- assuming you feel the same?"

well NO FUCKIN WAY SHERLOCK WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT -God again probably

"yeah dumbass, ofcourse i do!" t whisper-yelled, trying to keep his excitement down as they were still in a theater after all !!!

after that, z just smiled n wrapped his arms around t's waist, returning the hug

but wait !! theres more !!

what kind of ikissjesse ship post would this be without cute couple hc's ???

the quiet stoic boy x loud energetic boy dynamic UUGF MY HEART I THINK IM DYIBG from how much i love this duo😔😔

z buys t a baseball cap in EVERY city/country they go to. every fucking one

even if its not a band tour, if z is out somewhere n sees a cool cap he thinks t would like, yall better believe this boy would cut off an arm n sell a kidney just for t to get that hat

t has a whole side in his closet dedicated to these hats z buys him, he finds it absolutely adorable

z actually thinks he isnt good at gift giving, so he was afraid t wouldnt like it at first, but t's reaction is enough conformation that he adores it

now what kinda aaron² hamilton lover truther would i be if i didnt mention the musical again 💪💪

they have FREQUENT hamilton marathons together, sometimes the other members of 4*town will join in too !!

they still sortve act like they did before, like friends n what not

however theyre also 300% more flirty

by that i mean T is 300% more flirty

z might be a LITTLE bit but def not as much as my boy aaron t (the r in aaron stands for rizzler -aaron t)

z isn't a big fan of PDA himself, however when t does little displays of affection when theyre in public he loves it ( he doesn't say it out loud bc he's shy but he does smile at t or to himself, holding t's hand or draping an arm over his shoulders )

when theyre in private z will hug t from behind, hold his waist, kiss his forehead, etc .... yk... bro stuff......

t surprises him by going BOO!!! and jumping up to put his arms around his shoulders from behind, which at first scared z shitless n earned t a lecture about why he shouldn't scare him like that bc z WILL swing but z is okay with it now n actually smiles ALBEIT A VERY SMALL SMILE when he does it

dates include but r not limited to playing basketball late at night together, movies, watching musicals, roadtrips to literally anywhere long or short they just wanna be in eachothers presence OUGHG I LOVE THEM

i forgot to mention !!! t is definitely the one who asked to be boyfriends, but z accidentally said "I love you" first

t was doing something dumb again, and z shook his head as he laughed, accidentally mumbling the words "I love you" out loud

t stopped dead in his tracks n snapped his head in z's direction, n yall this boy was STRESSED he did NOT mean to let the world know this information

z covered his face with his hands n his face was PINK pink bro but t just laughed n walked over to him, cupping his face in his hands and staring at him with a very VERY smug but genuine n happy grin

z scoffed, but soon glanced back at the other boy and smiled shyly

theyre so cute im throwing up in class

there's more but i think this is long enough for now, sorry for the wait pls snack on this while u wait for the rest of my jesro + aaron² content i have planned WINK WINK

thank u for reading <3

#4town #turning red #4townie #4town aaron z #4town aaron t #aaron² #aaron t x aaron z #turning red headcanons #4town headcanons

[callsignspark]

soft-tober | 03 | Callie Bassett

soft-tober is about experiencing the joys of October with loved ones. each day is a fall-related one-shot for one of the couples from my Dagger, Sword & Shield universe, plus a few extras! today is Callie and Kelly with “Do you like cinnamon” from this prompt list.

If you’d like to be tagged for soft-tober, please send an ask!

word count: 1.3k

soft-tober masterlist | main masterlist | divider credit here

warnings: extreme fluff, discussions of breast cancer diagnosis, chemotherapy and side effects from treatment, pining and yearning

callsignspark disclaimer: my blog is an 18+ space; minors do not interact - you will be blocked. I do not consent to my work being copied, run through an AI generator, translated, or posted elsewhere. I do have an AO3, where I eventually will be cross-posting my works.

03. "Do you like cinnamon?"

Callie is sitting on the entryway bench, lacing her boots, when a thump catches her attention. It’s not the dog, she thinks as she watches Rupert pad toward the noise, his nails clicking across the wood floors. Finishing the knot on her right boot, she peers down the hall, trying to figure out if Kelly is awake or if it’s Emma trying to steal treats again.

“God- fuck!”

The breathless cursing lets her know it’s not the cat making all the noise but, in fact, the human she married. She walks into the kitchen to find her wife sitting at the breakfast nook table, hunched over and breathing hard.

“Kelly? What’s wrong? Can you breathe?”

“Yeah.” Callie isn’t convinced by the way she gasps the word, something Kelly notices because she grabs the edge of Halo’s flight suit before 911 can be dialed. “Couldn’t reach the oatmeal, and it took it out of me. Just need a minute.”

Immediately, she feels guilty. Kelly had a chemotherapy session two days ago, and treatment always exhausts her, but Callie had been so busy at work that Aliyah had been staying at the house to help out. She hadn’t even been thinking about how it was day three, the day when Kelly’s appetite usually returns.

You should have known. It’s been four months of this. Are you even paying attention?

Callie continues to berate herself as she rubs Kelly’s back; it doesn’t do anything to help her catch her breath, but it makes Callie feel like she’s doing something. Like she’s actually helping.

That’s been one of the worst parts of this. The worst obviously is Kelly getting diagnosed with Stage 2 breast cancer, but the constant helpless feeling. She’s not a doctor or a nurse; she’s just a WSO. The Navy's basic medical training can’t do anything to help against mutating cells. She can’t do anything to help the woman she married.

“Okay, other than the breathing, how do you feel? Dizzy? Sore?”

Kelly shakes her head, “Just need to catch my breath. Hungry, though.”

“Yeah? That’s good. You still want oatmeal? Or I can make something else? Whatever you want.”

“You’re going to be late to work.”

“It’s okay. I just texted Mav that everything is fine, but I’m going to be a bit late.”

Kelly’s head pops up, her brown eyes wide with concern and much clearer than when she got back from the treatment center, Callie notes with relief. “You can’t do that!”

“Yes, I can. Mav understands.” Callie adjusts the brown beanie Kelly had chosen to keep her shaved head warm, centering the little cow before pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. “You’re a little warm; you sure you feel okay?”

“Yeah… tired.” Kelly hums, leaning into the hands cupping her face, both of them enjoying the closeness of the moment. They linger, not pulling away until a rumbling stomach interrupts them.

Callie reluctantly pulls away. “Still gonna take your temperature, just to make sure. You want oatmeal?”

Efficient movements get her from the bathroom to the breakfast nook to the kitchen in record time. Pulling the jar of rolled oats from the baking cabinet and measuring everything out as the water starts to heat up. If she’s going to make oatmeal, she’s going to do it on the stove. It’s best to save the microwavable stuff for when Kelly needs to make food herself.

The thermometer beeps, and it’s a relief to see it says 99.5° - slightly elevated but consistent with the other treatment sessions.

“Do you like-” Callie cuts herself off as she catches sight of the wedding photo that was put on the fridge the week after they got married.

It’s the two of them from five months ago, standing in front of the chapel. A smiling Callie is dipping a grinning Kelly, who hadn’t lost her hair yet, both of them laughing at some dumb joke Fritz had made while Aliyah took the photo.

They agreed it was their favorite photo from the day, easily choosing that one to use as the photo on their announcement cards. It was harder to decide on what to write inside the cards. How much of the truth to share.

Hi everyone! We know this is sudden, but we got married in Vegas last weekend! Turns out Kelly has cancer, and her insurance is total shit, so Callie proposed to her pet-sitter-turned-friend after knowing her for less than a year so she doesn’t die! We’re sorry we didn’t let everyone know, but we’re actually committing insurance fraud, so we’re just trying to make it look like a whirlwind love story! Thankfully, we’re lesbians, so no one questioned us hitching the U-Haul to Kelly’s Subaru for our third date! And now to answer the unasked questions! No, we didn’t register anywhere; we feel guilty enough as it is! Kelly’s prognosis looks good; they caught it early, and she’ll be able to get good treatment with Callie’s Tricare coverage! We’re just friends! We sleep in different rooms! But if anyone official asks, we share Callie’s bedroom because it has an ensuite, and Kelly’s room is the guest room. It’s not suspicious because she’ll need space after chemo treatments! Yes, we kissed when the Elvis impersonator said; no, you cannot see the photo. Don’t worry about sending stuff for our first anniversary; we’ll probably be divorcing by then!

They had gone with something very different on the massive stack of announcements they sent out. The newly married couple spending the week traditionally reserved for a honeymoon filling out piles of paperwork to get Kelly coverage as quickly as possible, telling friends the truth, and asking them to lie if questioned by investigators. The worst had been filling out the envelopes, the sober mood turning more and more sour by the second as they realized how many people they were lying to.

Despite the bad taste it left in her mouth, Callie didn’t care. Kelly only had a few more treatment sessions left, and at her last checkup, the oncologist was optimistic about the progress. It’s not how she had imagined getting married, but her friend was going to live, and that was the important part.

“What were you gonna say?”

“Oh!” Callie blinks, grabbing an egg from the fridge and checking on the oatmeal to stall. To shake away the thought that she barely knows anything about the woman she married. About the woman she was going to ask out before the diagnosis came down. “I was gonna add a little brown sugar and cinnamon. Do you like cinnamon?”

“I do, that sounds good.”

Callie nods, distracted as she scrambles the egg and fancies up the oatmeal. She feels guilty for enjoying moments like this. Where she gets to spend time with Kelly, take care of her, but they don’t happen very frequently. Even being married doesn’t get her much quality time with the woman she’s had a crush on for months.

“Here you go. Oatmeal and a scrambled egg - for protein - with your meds as an appetizer. And I moved the microwave food down to the counter for now. We’ll reorganize the cabinets this weekend so everything is easier to reach.”

“Yum.” Kelly grimaces at the medication, but her face smooths out as she gets a whiff of the food. “This smells great, Callie. Thank you.”

“Of course, any time. Aliyah is going to stop by later. And let me know what you want from the store; I’m stopping after work today.”

“Okay, have a good day.”

“Thanks, Kel.” Callie murmurs as she ducks down to kiss her wife’s forehead. “Call me or Mav if you need something, okay? He’ll take care of it if I’m in the air. I’ll see you tonight.”

Callie forces herself to leave, only looking back once to see Kelly digging into the oatmeal. Her heart softening at the sight of the dog by her feet and the cat curled up on her lap, wishing she didn’t have to go to work.

Maybe I’ll finally get to ask her out for real after we get divorced.

@gretagerwigsmuse | @hangmanapologist | @hangmanbrainrot | @princessphilly | @hangmanssunnies | @thesewordsareallihavetogive | @a-court-of-roscoe-and-baby | @katieshook02 | @hellojameshowyadoin | @aristotles-butthole | @atarmychick007 | @whatislovevavy | @kmc1989 | @sometimesanalice | @laracrofted | @yuckosworld | @mika-darling | @bradshawsbaddie | @bobblebobsbae | @ohtobeleah | @withahappyrefrain

#elle’s soft october #top gun maverick fic #top gun maverick au #top gun maverick imagine #top gun fic #top gun au #top gun imagine #DSS universe #callie halo bassett fic #callie bassett fic #callie halo bassett x oc #callie bassett x oc #callie bassett imagine #halo imagine #An Unexpected Proposal fic #AUP fic #elle writes

[greaseonmymouth]

tagging games

hokay so I've been tagged in a bunch of these over the past few months weeks, by different people, so let's have some memetic fun

1. fanfic writer's bingo

I was tagged by @mslanna !

well, i did get one bingo! I have never commissioned fanart but I have received it. i debated whether to tick off that last square - 'wants to be a professional writer some day' because eh, i could take that or leave it? i do write original fiction and i have at times dreamt about getting it published, but also, i don't actually care. i write because i enjoy writing and getting paid for it i think is highly likely to make me hate it, so.

2. get to know you better game

I was tagged by @love-lays-bleeding !

get to know you better game! answer the questions and tag 9 people you want to know better.

last song i listened to: Danser Med Drenge - Alt for at beholde dig. it's on my Carl x Assad playlist but also Danser Med Drenge are just genuinely enjoyable in general

currently watching: 9-1-1, Grey's Anatomy, and Station 19. clawing at my face waiting for new episodes for all three shows. aside from that, nothing really, though I think I'll watch Dead Boy Detectives when it drops

currently obsessed with: 9-1-1, Afdeling Q.

3. nine people to get to know better

I was tagged by @foxesonstilts ! some repeat questions, but we'll manage.

last song: TV-2 - De første kærester på månen. this is also on my Carl x Assad playlist which makes no fucking sense because this is a song about teenagers in love and first heartbreak HOWEVER it is a banger and when spotify queued it up after my playlist finished, I was like, you know what, I'll just put it on the list.

favourite colour: considering how many blue items i own it must be blue. honestly though i love a lot of colours and am also partial to green, yellow, orange, pink, red, purple

currently watching: see above

sweet/savoury/spicy: all of them? they each have their time and place but most of all they belong in my mouth

relationship status: single and not willing to mingle

current obsession: finding a pair of hiking boots/shoes. i had ordered a pair THREE WEEKS AGO but UPS lost my parcel so i finally got refunded today but i'm leaving on holiday in less than a week and i still need fucking hiking shoes and i'm losing my mind

last thing you searched: "outdoor sport store london"

4. 20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged by @palavapeite !

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 

117 on my main, but not all of them are fics and not all of the fics are written by me, or just me (some are fanbinding posts, some are fanart, some are collaborative works). including my other two accounts, we're talking 224 works in total.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

on my main, 867,037 words, but that includes about 120k not written by me.

3. What fandoms do you write for? 

currently: Afdeling Q, BBC Shetland. though for the latest yuletide I went back to Volstovic Cycle for a stint and i wrote my first ever Ocean's 11 fic after years and years of only reading.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

that's 4 Harry Potter fics plus one Avengers/Batman crossover I wrote in 2012 on a whim after seeing the Dark Knight Rises and which became unexpectedly popular for a bit. I still love that fic though:

How to become a superhero and gain a family (minus the picket fence) - 7k, Tony Stark & Bruce Wayne, Steve/Tony. 2,758 kudos

the HP fics are:

Don't Blame Me (It Was All a Blur Last Night) - H/D, 7,468 kudos I'll Tell You a Secret (Just Don't Tell) - H/D, 5,209 kudos Here Now, Gone Yesterday (or Back to the Future) - R/S, T/J, 3,078 kudos Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them (or Draco Malfoy's Guide to Stop Dying and Start Living Instead) - H/D, 2,607 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments?

yes, usually. I stopped responding to comments on my HP fic a while ago because I couldn't summon the energy to engage with them, and more recently I turned off all comments for HP fic so that I wouldn't have to bother at all. I'm glad people are still able to enjoy these fics, but I need some distance.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I've written some dark fic in the past and I think what comes closest is this old thing I wrote for HP nextgendarkfest back in like 2011, in which some of the nextgen characters (including Harry's sons) were criminals who staged their own murders to cover up a heist they did but it implies that Harry was on to them, nearly caught them in the act, and was devastated about it.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

almost all of them??? most of what I write has a happy ending because I want happy endings, damn it. if by happiest you mean 'least complicated' or 'unadulterated joyful' or something like that, then maybe...I don't know, god, I could name at least 50 fics like that just off the top of my head.

You know what, let's do the most recent one:

Et Afdeling Q Julemysterie - this is pure fluff and happy ending and it makes me smile like a fool in love, so.

8. Do you get hate on fics? 

not in a while - I used to get some nasty comments on this one old HP fic that had a nextgen teenage character working out his sexuality, and some people took offense at the character being asexual/not being asexual enough/turning out to not be asexual in the end. like, make up your mind about what the problem is at least? I also got nasty comments on another HP fic which featured aromantic polyamorous Harry in a V relationship with Ginny and Draco (and Ginny herself was in a V relationship with Harry and Blaise) for various reasons, including but not limited to people not understanding that one can in fact be both polyamorous and aromantic at one and the same time. by the time i posted the everybody is trans HP fic I was anticipating nasty comments so I turned comment moderation on for that fic.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

sometimes. in the past I would include it (and hate writing it) because I thought you had to, but these days I only write it when I feel like it. more often than not it's some kind of character moment rather than a horny thing, though I do usually try to approach the smut writing from the angle of 'what would this character enjoy about having sex with this other character? what are their focus points? what are they horny for? what are their coherence levels? what are their sensitivities? how well do they know their own body? their partner's body? how do they communicate? etc. etc.' you'd think that leads to some very unsexy smut writing but if i'm honest i think those bits of writing actually wound up being both the horniest writing i've ever done AND the most true to character (according to my interpretation of the characters anyway).

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

a few - crossovers don't hold a lot of appeal for me in general, so when I've done crossovers there's usually been a 'what if?' spark that set if off.

aforementioned how to become a superhero fic, Avengers/Batman crossover, in which Tony Stark and Bruce Wayne are longtime friends.

it's pure filth that i hide (time for genocide) - Volstovic Cycle/Pacific Rim crossover (or possibly just fusion?). Volstovic Cycle characters pilot jaegers and fight kaijus, no pacrim characters appear.

Dragons - Volstovic Cycle/Harry Potter crossover (...or...fusion?) I can never remember the difference between crossovers and fusions. Harry Potter characters ride dragons á la Volstovic Cycle, no Volstovic Cycle characters appear.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes! the full list of translations (and podfics) of my fics is here. I've had fics translated into Russian and German.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes. @palavapeite mentioned this but we co-wrote an absolute deranged behemoth of a 'social media' fic (really, it was a 'livejournal' fic, but same difference) back in like 2008/2009 and it was honest to god some of the best fun I've ever had writing something and also, it was a work of ART.

I have since participated in fests like big bangs and reverse big bangs where I've written or made art, which is not quite the same as co-writing. I once ran a collab fest where I co-created a comic with three friends, which we cowrote and each drew various bits for, which was a lot of fun. and! with @gkkri we co-wrote (and illustrated) a R/S fic (but really it was a Sirius & Regulus fic in R/S disguise) back in 2017 as our last hurrah to the Remus/Sirius fandom as we were both feeling like we hadn't anything left to say for this ship and let me tell you, that co-writing process was like a dream and I'm still really proud of what we made.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? 

I don't have one??? I'm a multifandom person, I enjoy a LOT of ships for various reasons and I don't think I have an all time favourite? some ships I cycle back to over time and some ships I never even write for, just read a shitton for. like I enjoy Steve/Tony still even though I haven't written any fic for them in over a decade? and I mean, despite my misgivings about JKR and general HP fatigue, I will never not love Remus/Sirius. and so on and so forth. the beauty of fandom is that there are so many great characters and dynamics out there to love

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

er, wellllllll there's this one Matt/Foggy wip languishing in my gdocs drive that I'm not convinced I will ever finish, but I really want to. I'll cycle back to it eventually probably. I also have this one Space AU for Caius/Al that I have officially abandoned, but I still think about it!! and yet!! that wip is probably approaching a decade old at this point. I don't know man.

I only have one active fanfic wip atm and that is my current Afdeling Q wip and I WILL finish it, I swear to everything that is beautiful in this world.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I have a lot of strengths and I'm not too humble to admit it, but I think my number one strength these days is that I Do Not Care what other people think anymore, I will write whatever I damn well please, the way I want to. if other people like it: great! if they don't: okay!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

plot sjkdgkfljsgd especially of the crime solving variety. I will never ever be a crime fiction writer. I'm also not great with action-type of plots because....well, I like reading plotty stuff but when I'm writing? I don't care, I just care about my characters and their dynamics and arcs and development and I will hang it on the thinnest scaffolding possible I can get away with to make the story go.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? 

the kind of another-language-dialogue i see in fic most often seems to be weirdly pointless or out of character, just dropped in (usually by a monolingual English speaker) who thinks it adds flavour to the character, when really, that character has never once in canon slipped into their other language in dialogue. because, well, most multilingual people don't? speaking as a multilingual person I'm far more likely to say something like 'shit what is that called in English' than just say the word in Danish. i mean, tell me you don't understand codeswitching without telling me you don't understand codeswitching.

as a counterpoint to this actually i read a Buck/Eddie fic the other day where Eddie had lines in Spanish, and that I had no issue with because a) he speaks Spanish in the canon b) with his family 3) who also speak Spanish. in the fic he spoke Spanish with his family, who also had lines in Spanish. that author did kindly provide translations but tbh I didn't check the translations because the other thing about this fic was, it was clear from context what was being said without the translations because the dialogue followed canon-levels in this regard.

generally though, my preference would be for the tried and tested "A line of dialogue here," said character A, in Language. "The dialogue continues." it gets the point across.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

band RPF. before that I was writing fanfiction without knowing it was fanfiction or what fandom was, for stuff that Didn't End The Way I Wanted It To or similar. but first actual fandom writing? band RPF. it's backed up on a secondary ao3 account now, but this shit was first posted on forums and livejournal a billion years ago.

20. Favourite fic you've written?

listen. 224 fics written (that I know of, because the heavens only know what's been lost to the sands of time at this point) and you want me to pick ONE favourite? absolutely fucking not. also, recency bias is a thing.

i don't know man. let me pick at random:

Of Gilded Wallpaper and Meddling Dragons - Temeraire, 5,068 words

No Archive Warnings Apply, William Laurence/Tenzing Tharkay, William Laurence, Tenzing Tharkay, Temeraire, John Granby, Iskierka Augustine Little, Romance, Fluff and Humor, dragons being dragons, bisexual awakening, agony aunt!granby, an excessive amount of gilded wallpaper, laurence blames the weather for his being hot and bothered, Laurence POV, tharkay brings sexy back 

Summary: Laurence and Temeraire have been living with Tharkay for a scant two weeks when Laurence sends Granby a letter that essentially boils down to hi John how did you know you're gay also plz help I am in trouble.

5. animal crossing picrew

I was tagged by @dejlige-dage !

i have never played animal crossing but this was fun

i am tagging: YOU. if you've read this, you're tagged.

#memes

[imminentinertia]

Today's the day when everyone is required to add their thoughts on The Eighth Sense ep. 6, yes? Here are mine, and I'll throw them under a readmore because there are spoilers.

It would be nice to be the kind of person who carefully screencaps and illustrates their posts, but alas and alack, there's only text.

I've seen a lot of theorising on most/all of ep. 6 being a dream or a hallucination, and while the cinematographic choices certainly point in the direction of the trip not being entirely real (the bright and slightly fuzzy filters, the sudden jumps, bringing nothing -> suddenly having all the camping gear you could wish for, the dreamy (hotel?) bed room, the shift from both of the guys sitting on the beach to Jae Won sitting alone in the exact same position), I think it might be an unreliable narrator twisting the "real" events of the episode. Not a dream, I think, but not quite a hallucination either.

I raised an eyebrow at the rest stop shop guy (side note: who is he. I want to see more of him in other shows/films) giving Ji Hyun the memory stick, and both eyebrows at him giving Jae Won the fireworks, because it made no sense at all.

But it does make sense if a narrator is edging into an idealised version of his story, where everything is bright and inviting.

From the rest stop on, I (and everyone else...) found the episode very unsettling, and the sudden camping gear really threw me - spare boots, really? When a few hours ago nothing was ready and you'd buy any thing you needed? At the entirely too bright and perfect morning on the beach I was practically squirming. It was so off compared to the cinematography up to the trip starting.

The unreliable narrator is most likely Jae Won. He's teetering on the brink of something, with his therapy and his meds and his father and the broken camera coming to a bit of a crescendo, and while he might not be all out hallucinating, he may be glossing over some things and blowing other things vastly out of proportion. We haven't been shown any hints about Ji Hyun being this unreliable.

So what sort of reality will we get in episode 7? I'm not even going to try and guess, it could go any way from a SKAM type mental crash and return to near normal and happy ending to all out horrible heartbreak and loss.

SKAM (I wonder which version(s)) was apparently used as an inspiration/preparation, according to a live they did, and SKAM's happy solutions for the mains was not necessarily the couple lives happily ever after (Eva breaking up with Jonas because that was the best for her at that point).

However, I note that the domestic trailer is far more upbeat than the international one, it seems from that like it's supposed to be feelgood overall. So maybe an open or happy ending? Yes please?

I also wonder why the tone in the domestic and international trailers are quite different. Could be something about what tends to lure the domestic audience in vs. what gets the international attention, and I don't know enough about the Korean audience to guess whether they enjoy getting a cheerful trailer and then a horrible heartbreak episode.

As for SKAM, back in the remake bonanza days there was indeed talk of making a Korean SKAM. It never came to be, and I absolutely don't want to call The Eighth Sense a Korean SKAM, but a beautiful Korean show that deals with sexuality and mental health? Yes fucking please. Also the reminder that SKAM lurks in the background here gives me a hope to cling to for a reasonably not-unhappy ending. It was utterly horrible watching Even's manic episode and Isak's panic at Even's text in O Helga Natt, but it turned out well.

Life is now, and don't trust your five senses too much?

I don't usually tag my poor mutuals in rambly posts, but perhaps @mynameisnotthepoint and/or @lurkingshan may be interested?

#the eighth sense #jae won x ji hyun

[luvrlou]

What are my Flaws

Pairing: Dinger Holfield x Fem!Reader

Warning: Swearing, Underage Drinking, Use of Weed

Summary: After being invited to a party some truths come out after a silly drunken conversation.

A/N: Not posted in absolutely ages sorry about that!

Word Count: 2.8k

Lainie Diamond, the school's popular sweetheart, most people feel a streak of jealousy when they see her walk through the halls with a herd of teenage boys, sometimes even girls, i"m not one to judge, trailing behind her. Although I should hate her, I mean she pretty much stole my ex from me, it's not her fault though, she's honestly breathtaking. I love her more than anything, we've had this bond like no other since she moved here about 4 years ago and ever since we've been attached at the hip.

Of course always being with the school's, hell maybe even the state's, wow girl can have it's downsides, like bringing her with me to meet a boy and him totally falling for him, or having to third wheel almost all the time!

Even though there are a few downsides I would never change her for the world, she has the most golden heart and intriguing personality, what is there not to like?

"Hey Y/N!" Lainie shouted across the classroom as I walked into maths, earning a hush from the balding teacher at the chalkboard, she rolled her eyes.

"Is that Lainie Diamond? In the flesh?" I laughed as I walked towards my desk.

"Yes it is, now be shocked," she teased back, causing me to faux gasp.

When I sat in my seat I immediately felt the presence of a certain redhead sitting behind me, I rolled my eyes, as much as I love my friends. Dinger and Joel always seemed to get me riled up, more so Dinger, he just always knew how to push my buttons.

"Good morning, Y/L/N" Dinger whispered from behind me.

"Dinger," I nodded, while trying to copy down what's on the blackboard.

"Not even a good morning, wow, fuck you too then." He gasped and muttered, making me huff in frustration.

"Calm down it's nine in the morning jesus." I groaned, I could hear him snicker to himself, he definitely knew that he got a rise of me. I just know there's going to be a long day ahead.

By the time lunch had rolled around I was on my last nerve with Dinger, I guess I'm feeling really irritable today, usually, I can keep my anger in until last period before he truly pisses me off.

I don't get how one person can have that many annoying characteristics, he's not even that bad a person to others, but he just has something out for me, I'm telling you. For example, when Bobby first introduced us, he was nothing but nice to me, mind that was about five or six years ago.

Ever since we were 15 he just seemed to have it out to annoy me, which influenced Joel to tag along and piss me off, it's two years later and they're still doing it, you'd think they would mature a bit, but no, only seems that me and Lainie have.

I mean even Bobby is more level-headed than him and trust me Bobby is a nutter and a half.

"If you glare any harder holes might actually burn in his back," Bobby chuckled, snapping me out of my hateful thoughts.

"How come I'm the only one truly irritated by his mere existence?" I question, facing the black-haired boy next to me.

"Maybe you like him!" He teased, nudging my shoulder.

"Yeah, no," I deadpan, now I'll admit he is a decent-looking boy but his personality is definitely off-putting. Bobby then gives me a knowing look, "as if, have you seen how he acts, I'd rather drown in scolding hot lava than date him for more than five seconds."

"Woah, that was a bit harsh princess," Dinger hummed. Great just great, why does he have to be near me whenever I don't want him there whatsoever.

"Don't be such a smart ass then Holfield and maybe my opinion on you will change," I scan his face for a moment, seeing a trace of a smirk, I continue, "which is extremely unliking since the thought of being with you is simply revolting."

I smiled to myself watching him give up and turn away to go talk to Joel, finally I had gotten a rise out of him.

Before I knew it lunch was over and I had to go back to class, I trudged through to halls toward my Physics room, dreading the next hour of my life. Luckily I sat next to a sweet girl, Evie.

"You don't look too happy," she commented when I practically flung myself in my seat.

"How could you tell?" I replied flatly.

"Well what's pissed you off, or who?" She questioned, slight humour in her voice.

"That stupid fuck, Dinger Holfield, god knows why I keep him in my life he's so incredibly frustrating!" I huffed, crossing my arms.

"I mean at least he talks to you, I would die if a boy with his looks even spared me a glance." She reasoned, a day-dreamy look in her eyes.

Her comment made me feel a bit distasteful, I don't really understand why but I pay it no mind and reply. "Sure he's ok looking but his personality is his main downfall."

Before Evie could reply the whole room was silenced by our teacher, she finally seemed annoyed by the class's constant chatter. After a treacherous class, the bell finally rang signalling it was the last period.

"What class are you off to?" I ask Evie as we gather our stuff.

"English," she groaned, "you?"

"Art," I answered happily, I honestly quite enjoyed art, well it's better than maths or english.

She quickly smiled at me when we parted ways to go to our separate classes.

Sadly my peace had been interrupted by none other than Dinger Holfield, who was slinging an arm over my shoulder.

"Dinger, what are you up to?" I inquired, my eyes flicking between his face and the arm over my shoulders while my cheeks flushed red.

"You looked quite lonely there, like a small puppy, so I'm here to walk you to class!" He cheered as if he was the kindest person in the world.

"Well I'm Mr Mackal's room, so we're nearly there," I told him, hoping to get away from the encounter as soon as possible.

He took his arm off my shoulder and started to fiddle with the zip of his army green jacket, "Me, Joel and Bobby are going to a party tonight, come with us will you?" He spluttered out. I just nodded in response, face still flushed, "and- uh- bring Lainie!" He finished his sentence, while trying to redeem himself.

I nodded again and chuckled as he practically sped-walked away, I didn't realise I was that scary. I shook off the slightly odd behaviour and entered my class.

Before I knew it the time of the party, Dinger had invited me and Lainie to, had rolled in. The boys were going to pick us up at seven so we had just over an hour to get ready.

"What are you wearing?" Lainie asked you slightly panicked at the time.

"Just a mini dress, or maybe a nice top and a skirt." I answer, rummaging through my closet, "you can wear one of my outfits, yeah?"

"Yes, please! You are honestly a lifesaver!" She smiled widely. I picked her out a black fitted skirt and a silver sparkling cropped vest to match, it was more my style than hers but it didn't matter, she suited everything.

While she changed into her outfit I started deciding between a dress to wear, I was thinking a black one with mesh arms, and perhaps some silver heels to match so that me and Lainey would be somewhat corresponding.

I changed into my outfit and we started to jokingly model about my room, "You have the best clothes, Y/N, I swear," Lainie praises, her comment made me beam, I was infatuated by her mere presence never mind her sweet words.

Lainie reached over my bed to glance at my alarm clock, "we have fifteen minutes, give or take, before the boys come." she commented, I hummed in response.

Lainie sat on my bed fawning over the photos of Ralph Maccio and River Pheonix in my newest edition of BOP, while she was engrossed in my magazine I took the last of my curlers out, I adored doing this to my hair it always added just the right amount of volume.

"Thats the boys!" I cheer as I watch Joel's red mustang pull up infront of my house, I quickly fix my hair and then the straps on Lainie's top before we leave my front door. "Bye Dad!" I shout up the stairs.

We swiftly exit my house and walk towards the car. Lainie obviously sat shotgun next to Joel, meaning I had to be stuck between Bobby and Dinger. "Hello honey," the redhead boy laughed, leaning close into my side.

The car journey was about twenty minutes, I didn't talk much although Bobby, Lainie and Joel seemed to keep themselves occupied and Dinger was trying to understand how to work Joel's new lighter.

"Come on man, I just want a smoke!" He groaned still flicking the side of the light.

I hummed, "hand it over," he obliged and I flicked on the flame and signalled for him to put the cigarette in his mouth. He watched me with open eyes and his cheeks a shade of rose. I quickly lit his cig and moved back, registering how close to him I was. When I sat back Bobby sent me a knowing look, making me mouth 'shut up' to him.

When we arrived at the party Bobby offered me his hand and pulled me out of the car, I walked to Lainie's door and helped her out, "Dinger didn't seem too happy about Bobby helping you out the car," she whispered with a teasing smile across her lips.

"Oh shut up Lainie," I mumbled as she laughed and linked arms with me.

We walked towards the front door of the house, I didn't really know whose party this was, apparently, it was one of Bobby's friends from the neighbouring school.

The first thing we did when we entered the house was find the stock of drinks, "what are you thinking Y/N?" Lainie asked, eyes roaming the display of vodka, beer, tequila, whiskey and even some rum.

"I'm thinking of a vodka coke," I pondered, grabbing a red solo cup. Lainie nodded in agreement grabbing the vodka and a cup of her own, she poured some vodka into the two cups while I grabbed the coke and added it to the vodka in both cups until it was mainly full.

'Okay I'm away to mingle, you want to come?" She asked me, I took a swig of my drink and shook my head.

"I'll catch you up later, yeah?" I smiled.

I am honestly so confused with Dinger, sure he's annoying but we have these moments, it's as if the world stops spinning and it's just me and him. Before I knew it my drink was finished, I poured myself a new one, this time with a more generous amount of vodka.

"I really need to go talk to more people," I mumble to myself, I really had to get this prick out of my head. I walked into the crowd and started talking to some girls.

"Hey! I love your dress, where did you get it?" A girl I've seen around school asks.

"Thank you, I got it from Tommy Hilfiger! Only $70 can you believe that?" I grin before taking a gulp of my drink.

"Hey Y/N!" A girl shouts, a big group walks up to me, Evie standing at the front.

"Evie! You should have told me you were coming!" I grinned, "oh my god, are those Guess jeans! I need them!"

"Yes, the fit of them is honestly amazing!" She fawned. "Want to come and get a drink with me, there's this one whiskey that tastes just like the apple juice in the mall!"

"Hell yeah!" I beamed, the other girls followed as we made our way to the kitchen, I poured the whiskey that Evie handed me into my cup and took a drink. "Evie how much percent is this?" I asked.

"It says twenty-seven, tastes like there's none though!" She laughed, gulping down the last half of her cup.

"So introduce me to your friends," I coax, eyes scanning the group of about seven girls behind her.

She turns around and points to the first girl, "This is Chanel, her mum really likes handbags," she whispered the last bit before pointing to the next girl. "This is Tracy," she makes her way down the line saying the name of each girl. They all looked nice enough but I was really wanting to mingle with more people, my mind wasn't exactly deterred from the thought of Dinger's face.

"I'm going to head, I'll talk to you all soon!" I smiled softly, added some more whiskey to my cup and walked into the crowd, hearing a chorus of 'byes' and 'see you laters' from the girls.

"Hey beautiful, where are you going?" An unfamiliar boy said, looking into my eyes.

"Oh no where," I giggle, I don't know if he's honestly attractive or if it's just the alcohol.

"Maybe we can talk a bit," he suggested motioning me to sit on the couch. "I'm James."

"Y/N, I haven't seen you around here before," I smiled, situating myself on the couch.

"Well I would remember seeing such a pretty face so I'm assuming you don't go to ACU?" He replied.

"Yeah I don't go there, I go to the school for the dumber part of town. I joked, downing the last of the liquid in my cup, feeling it slide down my throat. "I'm going to get a new drink, I'll be back in a second."

"Wait, give me your number just in case I miss you," he offered me a pen off the nearby table, I wrote my number onto the palm of his hand and walked to the kitchen.

While I was on my way towards it a pair of hands grabbed my waist, I whipped my head around to see Dinger with a clenched jaw. "Dinger, what the fuck!" I mutter sternly. He stayed silent while he guided me into the room.

While he walked me I felt over whelmed by his redolent scent. "What do you thing think your doing," he whispered through clenched teeth.

"Getting dragged by you to the kitchen, duh!" I drunkenly laughed.

"Don't even think about fucking with me Y/N" He threatened.

I grabbed more whiskey and filled my cup to the brim, " I'm not doing anything you're the one grabbing me and dragging me away!"

"That guy! Why are you talking to him?" He questioned getting close to me, I could smell the strong stench of beer and weed in his breath.

"Cause I'm a single girl who can talk to whoever she pleases!" I babble, looking at him with the most menacing eyes my drunken state can muster.

"God you're so stupid! I like you Y/N!" He practically yelled.

"No you don't" I whisper, looking at his pleading eyes.

He backed away from me and sat on a chair at the drinks table. "What's my flaw?"

I laugh, until I realise he's deadly serious. "Well you're irritating, you have a bit of a jealous streak, clearly, and you always push my buttons." I giggle.

"So nothing physically is wrong with me?" He ponders.

"No, you're hot as hell!" I admit, feeling his eyes glued to me as a finish yet another cup of whiskey.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I mean I would be in love with, like head over heels, if you were less annoying." I chuckle grabbing the bottle and pouring the drink right into my mouth instead of a cup.

He groaned and grabbed my face, "you're so fucking confusing," he crashed his lips right into mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he trailed his hands down my back to my waist.

He pulled back as we heard a set of footsteps walk into the room. "Thank god! I thought you died Dinger!" The voice belonged to none other than Bobby Keller. "Y/N?"

"Hey Bobby," I replied cautiously.

"Hey girl!" He shouted, well more squealed. Yes he was definitely high. "Want to come smoke with us!"

I hummed before nodding and grabbing Dinger's hand and following Bobby towards the back garden. He handed each of us a joint and we sat on the grass while gazing at the abendrot sky while the drugged smoke filled our lungs.

#lou writes fanfic #dinger holfield x reader #dinger holfield #dream a little dream x reader #dream a little dream #corey haim #corey haim x reader #Spotify

[asyouleft]

Thank you @ctrsara for the tag! I'm pretty sure I've done this one before but why not! \o/

How many works do you have on AO3?

96! But I have a lot of stuff on LJ that I never moved over to A03 and I recently discovered I put up a few fics on FF.net that I never moved over either, haha.

What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,249,703!

What fandoms do you write for?

In my fanfic career, I have written: Marvel Comics, X-Men, Harry Potter, Doctor Who, Supernatural, Torchwood, Stargate Atlantis, Marvel (Irondad), Heartstopper and a few misc ones in other fandoms.

I recently found a Boy Meets World fic I wrote like 15 years ago, so that's fun. Have no memory of writing it!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Five Time Faculty Members Had to Call Peter's Emergency Contact + One Time He Shows Up Anyway

Five Times Tony Stark's Fabled Intern Just Showed Up + One Time He Was Invited

The Hero of Our Own Story

There Is Always One Last Light To Turn Out

For We Are Bound by Symmetry

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, all of them! It's usually just a thank you <3 but I will talk to people if they talk back.

What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hm, I think it's If You Find That You Feel Lost, I'll Be Your Ticket Back.

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

lol, I mean, all of them end pretty hopeful, yeah? That's the best I can do.

Do you get hate on fics?

On a few of them, yeah. People can think what they want, I know sometimes I walk a thin line when it comes to the "happy" bits or I sometimes make characters a little more unlikeable (I mean I consider it more realistic) but I sometimes get push back on it. Usually it's when I'm doing Irondad and they are like aren't father/son within seconds of seeing each other, lol. Opps, sorry I like realism in my superhero fics!

On Edge of Your Name, some people found Charlie unrealistic but I didn't think so at all.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes! Slash mostly but I've done het and femslash in the past.

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not really! Maybe one day I'll consider it

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

A looooooooong time ago, someone poached a SGA fic I wrote and posted in, get this, in an LJ community I posted it in originally, lol.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

YES! Oh my god I was so excited, two fics of mine are in RUSSIAN. HOW COOL?

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! Me and @royalhearthuff did a chapter in their, Through The Years Narlie fic and me and @brbrbeatrice are hovering around a Narlie colab right now too. <333333

I'm also open to collabs!

What’s your all time favorite ship?

Ugh, so hard to answer this because I have so, so many OTPs, lol. I mean McShep is always at the top of my heart, but Narlie since it's fucking canon and oh yeah Ineffable Husbands will never not make my 12 year old heart beat faster.

What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Hm, there are a few. I've got an Irondad that's a Tony presumed dead that I'd like to get finished but it's so hard to keep Tony Stark presumed dead and not escape wherever he's at.

I've got a Charlie at uni fic that I really want to eventually finish but I lose steam on it everytime I try!

What are your writing strengths?

I think I can do dialogue pretty well at this point, I think I've mastered the flow of it.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Everything else? Ha.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I don't, lmao. I mean, I have but it's only small things that I can google.

First fandom you wrote for?

I think it was honestly something like Rainbow Brite or X-Men comics, to be honest. I also may have written self insert Power Ranger fics and Inspector Gadget lol oh and Captain Planet.

Don't judge me lol I was writing fic before I really understood what I was writing. I just liked adding myself into adventures with my favorite characters!

Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

I dunno, it's so hard to pick sometimes. I really love my SGA Disaster It Strikes On a Daily Bases, for Irondad it's always Just An Intern and I think I'm obsessed with my Narlie, And You Know For Me It's Always You.

And I tag whomever wants to do this because tagging people gives me anxiety.

#fanfic asks #fanfic

[asiandra-dash]

Hi i saw u wanna rewrite akikasa hcs PLEASE WRITE ME SOME I BEG /nf /lh

HJKJSKDKHS AKIKASA anyways I was referring to a short story I wrote a while ago but THIS!!! IS (I think) MY FIRST AKIKASA RELATED ASK!!!! I MUST WRITE!!!!!! All I have to do is figure out which thoughts are based on canon and which ones are AUs-

I took 18 days to finally post this because I kept getting ideas and had to force myself to stop because this is way too long 888 words man this ain't fanfiction also if this is illegible I'm sorry none of my headcanon posts will ever be organized no beta or read more we die like my grades after my orchestra field trip

Starting with basic shit Akito is SO so in denial about his feelings and when he's finally fed up with it he chucks it down to infatuation (It is not)

And Tsukasa is an oblivious idiot to everything even though he has a stupid crush on this ginger he just refuses to say anything because he still thinks Akito despises his guts

My guy every little bit of physical contact you make with carrot head makes him look like color hex #ff0000 RGB 255, 0, 0 how do you not notice this

Tsukasa fell first, and they both fell harder >:)

You know Tsukasa'a 1* card where Akito saved the poor man from a spider or something that's when it happened Tsukasa didn't know at first cause like haha who the hell falls in love with someone over something so small I barely even know the guy

If Akito confessed first, after a long moment of awkward silence and Akito wishing the floor would eat him alive, Tsukasa is suddenly hugging him and crying (That's a yes btw)

If Tsukasa confessed first, it would take a bit (probably a few days or weeks) but eventually Akito with the support of everyone finally accepts his feelings for Tsukasa (He didn't tell anyone about the confession btw it was probably Akiyama or one of Tsukasa's friends that told everyone also the threat of Rui was probably another reason he couldn't deny lmao)

Every date, and I mean EVERY SINGLE DATE, Tsukasa will always bring or buy some cheesecakes or pancakes for Akito

And if he doesn't the next time he brings lunch for Akito he'll bring him more cheesecake than he usually does to make up for it

When Tsukasa found out Akito's favorite flowers were sunflowers, he sometimes brings one for him too :D

Tsukasa probably got a pair of sunflower clip-on earrings too (Or whatever they're called)

Tsukasa loves to tackle hug Akito and it never fails to make the ginger laugh <3

Tsukasa borrows Akito's jackets a lot (At least twice a week).

Akito complains about it but let's be honest he loves it when he gets it back and all he smells on it is Tsukasa's scent

Tsukasa loves giving gifts to Akito even if there's no special occasion, usually some type of jewelry like earrings and the next day Akito's most likely wearing it

Obviously, they invite each other to their shows, and sometimes their other bandmates too

During WxS shows Akito's supportive and is internally loud but during VBS concerts Tsukasa is HOLLERING Akito's name and singing along if he knows the lyrics it's embarrassing but if you look closely enough you can tell it hypes up Akito a little more and he tries even harder (An has taken note of this and teases him nonstop about it)

Neither of them are a huge fan of PDA but if you stare long enough you'll probably miss a sneaky little kiss when you blink

That or if Tsukasa's in a really good mood he'll practically cling to Akito (Which is like 50% of the time tbh)

That one post I made on my side blog is real and so is the first tag

Yes Ena and Saki are supportive but holy shit Akito wants to fucking strangle Ena whenever she brings it up (This applies to An as well)

Tsukasa helps Akito be more open with his feelings and Akito helps Tsukasa deal with negativity better

Around people, Akito still treats Tsukasa how he would (if Tsukasa isn't being clingy) but once they're alone Akito acts like he's touch starved and refuses to leave Tsukasa alone

Akito sometimes helps Tsukasa with practicing for his shows. He's obviously not as good but he's trying and Tsukasa appreciates his efforts

Tell Akito to say wonderhoy and he'll look at you like you're fucking insane but have Tsukasa tell him and he'll say it as unenthusiastically as he can manage

And then Tsukasa will look at him all :((( and Akito does it with more energy and "jesus fucking christ the things I do to make Tsukasa happy" (It's just a wonderhoy idk why you're so pissed /hj)

I do not understand Japanese and I am not caught up on that one event story with furry Akito so correct me if I'm wrong (about the italicized part) but before Akito gets over his fear of dogs Tsukasa always made sure they would steer clear of them and if one suddenly appeared this blond pink theatre kid is going to protect his pathetic fucking boyfriend with his life

Rui: Is that a hickey? | Tsukasa: No! It’s just a mosquito bite. | Akito, walking into the room: Hey, guys. | Rui: Hi, mosquito.

Whenever one of them stays up really late when staying over. the other tries to convince them to go to bed and cuddle/snuggle with them and it works.

Tsukasa practically begs meanwhile, if possible, Akito hugs Tsukasa behind and basically just collapses onto him half asleep mumbling into his ear (Can you tell I'm tired it's 1 AM and I got 3 hours of sleep yesterday I'm running off of a power nap rn)

Obviously, Tsukasa can't do anything with Akito like that so he basically carries Akito to the room of whoever they're staying at

Akikasa supremacy WHO'S WITH ME AKIKASA!!!!!!! (I'm dying on a hill please)

Divider / Reply Icon made by me! ( 1 | 2 )

#the brainrot is strong #it is real #(ﾐ ᵕ ﻌ ᵕ ﾐ)┆Wanderer Writes #project sekai #pjsk #prsk #prosekai #pjsekai #project sekai colorful stage #hatsune miku project sekai #hatsune miku colorful stage #akikasa #shinonome akito #akito shinonome #tenma tsukasa #tsukasa tenma #headcanons #pjsk headcanons #I'm gonna die doing as much homework as I can now I haven't been here mentally for the last three weeks I am so far behind

[tellthatbrokebitch]

life update:

so i’ve been here for six weeks now, and honestly? i think they’re going to discharge me soon. i have made… tremendous progress. six weeks ago i couldn’t stand, i couldn’t walk, i was in pain any time iattempted either of these actions, and i’m not gonna sugarcoat it - i was super fucking depressed, to the point where my own thoughts scared me some of the time. everything felt hopeless. i had been dealing with this for a year, and every time i looked to the future, i just wasn’t there. i couldn’t fathom living the rest of my life like this. event hough it all happened over the course of a year, it felt like i was on a slow-moving train headed over a cliff, and i couldn’t get off

every time there was even a glimmer of hope, it was quickly extinguished. and then i came here. and it hasn’t been perfect; it’s been a huge adjustment, and i’ve had to face some harsh truths, and i’ve had to overcome a lot of my own insecurities and fought my anxiety and impostor syndrome every step of the way - literally - but i did it. and yeah, i had setbacks. there was a day last week when i think i spent most of the day crying. i’ve woken up in the morning and been in such pain that i didn’t think i could possibly put any weight on my good foot, let alone the bad one

but i started with a single step. i went from only being able to take five steps, to taking ten, to fifty, to one hundred, and now i can walk all the way to the pt room/gym, do my pt, and walk back. i went from having to - TMI - use a bedside commode to being able to walk to and from the bathroom without help. and yes, all of this is with a walker - but i actually just yesterday tested taking a few cautious steps without it, and i didn’t fall. there’s a set of fake stairs in the gym, and i’ve gone up and down with minimal assistance, the last two times with a cane. my last goal is gaining confidence using the stairs, so that when i finally go home, i’ll be able to use our stairs without worrying i’ll fall. maybe by the end of the year, i’ll be able to forego the walker/cane altogether. maybe next year, i’ll be able to work again

the point is, i’m doing better. and i know i’m not the most engaging, and i’m not all that sociable, and usually i would rather rip out my hair than make the first friendly overture. but to my mutuals, to my followers, to anyone who’s ever left a nice comment in the tags of a post or engaged with a post i made… the byler fandom, for all that i feel very much on the outskirts, you’ve all made the last fifteen months of my life more bearable, less soul-crushing. these two little guys have given me so much, bc before season four, i hadn’t written anything in… years. and now i’ve published over 200k just in the last eleven months, and i’ve had several lovely conversations with lovely people, and it’s all collectively kept me from drowning. so thank you

oh gosh this got so sappy

#tellthatbrookebitch

[4th-make-quail]

Asks for a Fic Writer!

Tagged by @eemamminy-art and @nateharmonica thank you!!

--

1. how many works do you have on AO3? 138! Which is weird cos it feels like only 2 minutes ago I was excited about hitting 100 lol

2. what's your total AO3 word count? 401,149 total

3. what fandoms do you write for? My top 5 written for fandoms are FFXIV (27), Resident Evil (26), FFXII (15), inFamous (13) and FFXV (13)! But I have a load of others as well - atm it's Baldur's Gate 3, alternated with my perennial beloved FFXII

4. what are your top five fics by kudos? Point of No Return - Resident Evil, Chris/Wesker, time travel fix-it fic Aphrodisiac - Overwatch, Reaper/Soldier 76, collaring and gloves kink Like a Drug - Resident Evil, Chris/Wesker, STARS era drug bust Filters - FFXV, Prompto/Ignis, 5 things fic about Prompto's photo taking Between Death and Ascension - Magnus Archives, Jon/Gerry, post season 3 fix it that got immediately jossed upon s4 releasing lol. Honestly I'm amazed this one is here, considering Jon/Gerry is a bit of a rarepair. Or at least, it was back then!! I have no idea of the current state of TMA fandom (and don't wanna know, ugh lmao)

5. do you respond to comments? Always as a rule, but usually quite a long time after I get them lksgfg

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Has to be From the Flames of the Fire, I Feel You, part 4 of my Sartauvoir/Basch series, because it's the fic where Basch dies at the end, and it finishes off with a notice from Noah about the death and funeral arrangements. I cried on my lunch break at work writing this fucker lmao

8. do you get hate on fics? I've not had anything since my ffn days, where I got a very mean comment about OOC. I mean, it was true, but MAN.

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind? It's very rare that I don't write smut! I think the yuletide fic I wrote was the first time in years lol. Either way, I like to write kinky porn with feelings and character study shit

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written? Not any more, but the craziest crossover with the most specific-ass audience was a British Comedy RPF crossed with FFX, where David Mitchell is a summoner and Charlie Brooker and Robert Webb are his guardians. It's called Spira Infinita, and I never did end up finishing it lmao. Oops. Either way, I had a blast writing it and I still think it was fucking good, all 9 kudos of it!! God... this just made me remember I also wrote a brooker/mitchell crossover with mgs. I was on some shit back then I tell you what

11. have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of! I'm not big enough for that, I think

12. have you ever had a fic translated? I thiiiink someone once asked me, but I forgot which fic it was tbh!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes!! I co-wrote one of my fave Ashe/Basch/Vossler fics with my friend when we got assigned each other for an ff_land exchange - Five Moments of Desire. It was really fun, we had a great time!

14. what's your all-time favourite ship? GOD this is hard!!! I think Nero/Credo tbh, I never get tired of thinking about them, even as sadly underrated as they are. Also Sartauvoir/Basch is highly up there, I've never been seized with such an insane streak of inspiration for a ship. They got me in their clutches and no mistake!!

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I don't actually have much in the way of wips, but I do have 5k of a Sart/Basch AU where Sart channels his fenex summoning to bring Basch back to life, but it stalled a little due to a combo of scheduling for other things, other ships taking over my brain for a bit, and honestly the general lack of fandom for them? I have a few close friends I met because of the ship, but getting such low response to things is really demoralising and makes it hard to continue. I DO want to finish it for sure, but atm I am too gripped by other ships so idk if it'll happen.

16. what are your writing strengths? I think dialogue for sure, and characterisation.

17. what are your writing weaknesses? Fight scenes x_x Which is annoying, because I love them and have a lot of sparring/fighting related kinks!!! I persevere, but I hate every moment of writing them lol

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Uhh nothing I've ever done! I think it'd be fine if you're fluent in that language OR if you have a trusted friend who is, who can give you actual sense-making sentences, but otherwise, do not!

19. first fandom you wrote for? Baby's first fandom was handwritten Redwall/Discworld crossover in reporter's notebooks as a very young child, but my first fandom-fandom was ffvii, where I wrote a frankly terrible Reno/Vincent fic! And idek why cos I don't ship it at all? I think I just had a boner for both of them and wanted to get it out. It is still on ffn alas, but eugh.

20. favourite fic you've written? Honestly I think it's my SartBasch series, Body Politics. It caters directly to my own id, and I think it's really good! I actually planned it out as a cohesive series AND actually finished writing it! Proud of myself lol. And I just.... *clenches fist* love those old men.....

----- tagging people, if u wanna do this, then consider urself tagged!!

#quailfic #ask quail #thank u for the tags!!

[mareastrorum]

i thought matt said essek's goal was to ingratiate himself to guide the nein away from the truth of his crime, not to kill them?

Correct! He did! I also realize looking back at my post that I didn't quite elaborate on something--mostly because I did not realize just how many people would read it. I'll take this chance to clarify a few things.

First, context. A short while ago, a post cycled a few times through my mutual group, many of whom are Essek fans/lovers/haters for various reasons, before I added in some sauce. For those who don't want to click, here's a screenshot:

Then I received an ask noting that they didn't think it was proven that Essek had given the Scourger a shiv:

Then I received another ask, which was the long post about why I thought Essek would have wanted to give the Scourger a shiv:

Which led to a bunch of other asks because, despite main tagging the characters, I didn't actually expect anyone to pay any mind to the post. I don't usually do meta posts, so I didn't anticipate all these responses. That's how we wound up here.

All that said, because my focus was on making a persuasive case for why murder was one of the options available to Essek and therefore why he had motive to ensure the Scourger had a shiv available to attack Caleb, I did not do the best job at emphasizing that murder was one of the options available. I don't think killing the Nein was the only option, the first option, or even the favored option. I think it was one of many and the Scourger just happened to be convenient.

So time to finesse. Next, yes, Matt absolutely chimed in on Essek's motivations of getting to know the Nein in the Campaign 2 Wrap-Up:

Marisha: Well, I'm curious, because-- and you've kind of loosely touched on this before-- that Essek was kind of supposed to be a bad guy, and then we made friends with him, and his heart grew three sizes that day? Matt: Yeah, you totally Grinched that motherfucker. ... Marisha: What was his plan? Matt: Essek-- Essek was designed not to be a major antagonist but an antagonistic force in the world. You guys kind of barged into the Kryn Dynasty and gave this extremely sought-after, thought-lost artifact that is intrinsic to their entire culture and religion. And as soon as you did that, Essek was like, "Well, first off, I know how they got that beacon, and I'm attached to this. I'm the one that smuggled it out, so I need to get in real close with these people and keep an eye on everything they do, because they're now the biggest loose end on my guarded person." You know, like-- like-- you know, if-- it's like committing murder and someone walks in and is like, "I found a boot in your yard," and he's like, "Fuck, fuck, fuck fuck!" You guys brought this in, and he was like, "I have to get to know them well." He immediately was like, "I'll take care of them. I'll work with their business. I'll figure out what they're going, and I'll be their-- their--" you know-- Laura: Liaison. Matt: Chaperone, essentially. And so it was him just trying to cover his ass while also trying to figure out what you were up to, what your connections were, how much you knew. And then the more he got to know you guys-- because his whole goal was just to keep this thing going with the Dynasty. He was fed up with a lot of the political structure of the Dynasty, or-- come to think of it, sorry, with the-- with the Assembly. He was fed up with a lot of the Dynasty's zealotry and he doesn't really have any formal interest in the Luxon, and he thinks that it's misguided. He thinks that there's a lack of interest in seeing what Dunamancy can actually do because everything is regimented instead by the cultural history of it, and he just wants to advance to see what is possible, and he found partnership in the Assembly in that way. But you guys kept, like, inviting him over for dinner, and asking about his-- Liam: We really scrambled his eggs. Matt: Yeah! Liam: For real, when we left him, I was like, "Well, I really hope that-- I see things that I have in common with him and I empathize, but he's going to need years to unpack his shit, or he's not, or he's just going to bend back and do all the things he was doing before without us." And then the time we met up with him again, he was a changed man. Matt: Yeah. Well, he was still struggling. He didn't know who he was, and at a certain point, your guys' interaction kind of showed him that he could be better, and he was struggling with the-- with being convinced that it was too late for him. And so it was this idea of like, "I've already fucked up my entire life, and I didn't realize it until I found people that actually cared to look past my position and my abilities." And he'd been a solitary figure his whole life except for his relationship with his brother. He didn't get along with his parents. He didn't get along with most people in the Dynasty unless they helped him maintain and advance his position of power and influence, and so you guys fucked him up. ... ... a large part of his early times was just trying to deflect and misdirect and like, "Don't look at me. I'm just here. Just here paying attention. I got nothing to do with any of this. That's weird, huh?" Then the more you got to know him, he eventually let that fall away. Yeah, I was not expecting any of that.

That's all the stuff from the wrap up specifically on Essek's intentions with the Nein. (I trimmed a bit about consecution since it's not directly relevant to this topic.) Note that, among all the things Matt said, he didn't write off any particular option that would have been available to Essek, but at the first interaction, he knew he needed to keep the Nein close. However, close doesn't necessarily mean friendship, and considering his position, experience, and cold attitude, Essek probably intended to foster a more formal and politically-minded relationship from the start.

Rather than restate everything from my earlier post that I should have finessed, the part that I really should have fleshed out was this:

Regardless of which situation this is, the best outcome for Essek would be neutralizing the interlopers before they come upon, intentionally or not, his involvement in the theft of the beacons.

By neutralizing, I meant specifically making sure that the Nein were no longer a threat, not necessarily killing them. That could have been sabotaging their status as Heroes of the Dynasty, distracting them, getting them out of the Dynasty permanently, setting up a scapegoat, or any other option of ensuring that these specific people--who somehow obtained a beacon he stole and returned it--would not further jeopardize his situation.

Still, the rest of my post focused on why and how killing them--specifically, setting up the Scourger to attempt to kill Caleb--would have been possible and even likely because the history of the posts I had been responding to were questions about why and how I thought he would. Unfortunately, I got so wrapped up that I failed to notice some (though not all) of my language dipped into sounding like I thought that was his plan all along.

No! I thought that was one of many potential moves Essek was arranging as an attempt to keep the Nein off his trail without losing control of their presence in the Dynasty. As their liaison, they went to him for help and advice even though they clearly didn't trust him. He had a position of power over them and used it well. He racked up favors so he'd have some leverage to pressure them if he so chose. He directed them to Waccoh, who had nothing to do with the beacons and would certainly request things of them that would help the war effort because her job was designing war machines. He encouraged them to investigate the Angel of Irons because that wasn't related to the Beacons either. Neither was their quest to the forge in Caduceus' s dream in the Flotket Alps nor the trip to Mythburrow.

You want to risk traveling to Bazzoxan and didn't even ask me to teleport you to save time or avoid risk? EXCELLENT, have fun on the death trip, make me proud! You want to go investigate a volcano in bum fuck elsewhere? EXCELLENT, have fun maybe freezing or burning to death. You want to find a dragon? EXCELLENT, have fun maybe getting eaten and/or frozen. You want to talk to the Scourger that hates you? EXCELLENT, gimme some time, I need to get that bitch a shank.

I'm sure that every time the Nein went off on a dangerous mission that had nothing to do with the beacons, Essek was relieved and hoped that some of them would die along the way. It was a temporary distraction and hopefully a permanent solution.

And it wasn't until episode 77, right before Essek escorted the Nein to see the Scourger again, that Essek told the Nein that the Bright Queen wants them to find the other beacon in the Empire. Whether you agree with me or not that Essek arranged for the Scourger to have the shiv, at that point, the risk the Nein posed to Essek had risen greatly when she made that decision. That mission inherently carried risk that they would learn about what he had done because it necessitated investigating the Cerberus Assembly. Time and time again, they had demonstrated their skills by doing all these missions in the Dynasty. We don't know exactly when the Bright Queen told Essek her wish, but considering the timing, it wouldn't surprise me if that was one of the reasons that Essek shifted from hands-off options to setting up a potential assassination.

All that is to say that I don't interpret Matt's exposition in the Wrap-Up as Essek wanting to be friends with the Nein. I interpret it as attempting to keep them from fucking him up, and as much as Essek makes a turn around in Eiselcross, he got the title of Shadowhand and the Bright Queen's trust for a reason. He was evil for a reason. And that would include the willingness to risk someone else's life for his own sake.

#my asks #essek thelyss