#you can say no anytime and consent is sexy and important but not all of my yes'es are a verbal “yes” y'know | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lu-lus-duckies · 2 months

Text

Hi, here's about me and some questions you might have!

Updated: april 26th 2024

MINORS DNI please

Important!! Please don't use real money to do things for me in any capacity. It makes me uneasy, uncomfortable and puts a lot of pressure on me. Thank you for your understanding <3 also Important: I can not and will not take anything seriously, if you want to say something serious to me, send me a DM, I'm more likely to respond seriously there

Who are you?

@ nunalastor's emotional support white boy™

People just call me lulu on here. I'm 20 and go by any pronouns. AFAB (and cis). my gender is whatever makes you gay. somewhere on the ace spectrum.

Also CEO of forcing people to get some fucking sleep!

important note: I respond in the horniest ways to @ nunalastorscursedkitten, but they have explicitly stated they don't want sexual stuff directed towards them without their consent. I have confirmed that they are okay with me responding in a horny way and you should make sure before doing it too

tags (will not sort these out at all):

lulu is delulu - my posts babygirl anon fest - asks specifically from babygirl revoke lulu's art license - my art stuff nunwhiskers - the ship of nunalastor x huskers-bar lulu is feral - reblogs where I am feral lulus nun reblogs - I just tend to reblog everything of nunalastors so it's a tag now lulu reblogs - art/theories/incorrect quotes ect lulu convos - me interracting with peeps here lulu crooks - going into detail about things i shouldn't be going into detail of. (maybe infodumping) cursed polycule - me and the 100+ husbands/wives interracting (xxx-angie list in their pinned) lulu asks - me answering asks this is a nunalastor simp blog - anytime I openly bark for nunalastor lulu lore - me accidentally dropping irl lulu lore lulu fun facts - exactly what it says lulu polls - polls lulu is a boomer - me not knowing basic pop culture things cuz I live under a rock lulu loves nunalastorscursedkitten / and paincaat too / lulu loves paincaat / and nunalastorscursedkitten too - my interractions with @ paincaat / @ nunalastorscursedkitten lulu loves getting called slurs - me getting called the f-word lulu infodumps - infodumps about stuff that might not always be hazbin hotel fools being sexy - @ the-aprilfools-bitch tag

who is safe here?

everyone except minors. I don't judge. This is a safe space regardless of race, gender, sexuality or anything else. Be as cringe/not cringe as you want

What is this blog?

Used to be a hazbin blog, now turned to me simping for daddy nunalastor and interracting with the cursed polycule

What can I ask or share with you?

Literally anything you want to share, no limits. I respond to everything, even hate so if I haven't responded I'm either asleep or the message didn't appear in my inbox.

One thing I don't respond to is chain sends cuz I can't be bothered with that shit. Anything else is a yes

What's with the bad English?

English is my second language. I pride myself on being able to read it fluently, but I might have problems with talking in a way that flows naturally to native speakers. So sorry bout that

What time are you active?

Honestly, all over the place. Don't look too much into it, but I'm from the country of Georgia if that helps

Can I use your ideas?

Absolutely! You don't even need to ask. I won't say this is a necessity, but If you decide to use them, I'd love it if you'd tag me. I love seeing all kinds of things people make and I'd love to see yours too!

Why are you so unhinged and sexual? Aren't you ace?

Asexuals aren't all sex-repulssed and can enjoy it too. I am uncomfy with the act of sex but I love joking and shitting about it. Me saying something is hot/sexy/makes my dick hard is just me saying "I love this and i think it's cool" when that isn't enough to express my love. (I think I'm being funny)

Is the art on nunalastor's blog you sometimes repost yours?

Yes, the art posted on their asks by mylz-flick is by me. It's my primary blog and i don't use it for anything so all my asks are submitted through there

Why don't you post as often anymore?

Because all my posts go straight to nunalastor's blog. Go check them out, it's great

By nunalastor s request:

Who hurt you?

Nunalastor did when they rizzed up my mom

What's with the worms? That's disgusting

Well, nunalastor made this post and it turned me on a little ngl

What is the cursed polycule?

Well, I spontaneously decided that my go to funny (not funny) joke would be to start asking everyone who agreed with me or had similar tastes to kiss me. Long story short, now I'm a whore™ with 100+ husbands that I can't keep track of and that's the cursed polycule

Why do you keep calling nunalastor daddy?

Many reasons. First, Nunalastor saying they would fuck my mom in the DMs when I told them about her. So naturally, if my mom and nunalastor got married they would be the dad hence, daddy. Also, nunalastor is unapologetically my favourite blog on here and the title "daddy" is reserved for them. Also their word is law to me and they deserve the respectful title

The way you interract with minors is disgusting

I have minors please don't interract in my bio for a reason. I expect a decent human being to see that and kindly leave my blog. I don't check who I'm responding to most of the time so I probably didn't even notice it was a minor. I'm just trying to be fun.

If you are a minor and I responded/reblogged your art or post with some batshit crazy shenanigans like I do with everyone, send me a DM and I'll delete it. I'd rather it be in the DMs instead of out in public because out here I have people acting like they hate me and I don't want to accidentally take something that's meant to be a serious request to stop like a joke.

What's with that one pregnant anon stuff at nunalastors blog?

Listen, I don't care what shit people send me, but if you even dare harm, harass or just in general be an asshole to the ones I consider nice people, I will not take that lightly.

To everyone: if you get haters, tag me so I can draw them pregnant.

Is the cursed polycule an actual relationship or just a joke?

It's just a joke between us.

Can I join the polycule?

Daddy has revoked my marriage license so you'll have to consult with the other members. I take what daddy demands very seriously

You can however, talk to the other members of the polycule and join. We could also have a platonic relationship going on in the polycule if you want

What is up with you and pronouns?

Sorry, in my native language there are no gendered pronouns. We just have a singular he/she/they for everyone. I use he/him for me (despite being a woman) because it's what rolls off the tongue easier for me. For everyone else I use they/them because you can never go wrong with neutral.

Are you actually attracted to nunalastor?

Honestly, the only time I've experienced attraction (i think? Still unsure if it was that) was with one girl at my uni and the feeling I have for nunalastor is very similar. It's not the exact kinda feeling but I have a very strong desire to make them proud. Not sure exactly what it is but no, I don't want to actually fuck them and I don't want to kiss them either. That seems gross. I do however wanna hold their hand and recieve headpats from them. Idk just know me as the nunalastor simp, that's easier to explain.

(and yes both mods)

Why do you keep mentioning nunalastor calling you the f-word?

Because I genuinely /gen /srs loved it. This isn't a joke. It made me overstimmed and honestly was a little overwhelmed with giddiness. keep in mind though, that while I enjoy getting called the slur, I will not be calling anyone that because that makes me uncomfy.

why haven't you responded to my reblog/comment/ask?

I generally respond to everyone I can. but either it was

lost in my notifs

was posted by a minor and I don't want to attract minors here

If it was on a reblog of something, I assumed it was meant for op

I just couldn't think of anything to respond with (which is rare)

feel free to let me know if it was either 1 or 3 but I won't respond to minors

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solemnly-mischievous · 3 years

Note

Could pls you write something where the marauders and you are taking about your safe word and boundaries?!

Thanks! <33

hell yeah! remember kids, if you're gonna engage in Practices of Dominant and Submissive Dynamics, these talks are always very important and essential and good. consent is sexy. stay safe. all that.

also, i'd never claim to be an expert on the topics they talk about - if i get anything off or word anything poorly, do tell me and i'll amend that.

anyway also the things they put on their hard limit list are not off the table for future fics, so keep that in mind :)

Contains: Fluff, discussion of bodily fluids & cnc, mentions of degradation and praise

Word count: 1.5K

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It's about one AM in the Gryffindor common room, and all your housemates are asleep—the only sound you can hear is the crackling of the fireplace and the sound of pages turning as Remus flips through his book.

You're laying in Remus' lap, his fingers combing absentmindedly through your hair and massaging your scalp. It feels so good.

"Oi—watch the cakes—"

"You watch your stupid feet, Prongs, you're stepping on my cloak—"

"—I swear to god if you drop the pumpkin juice, I'll throw you and your bloody cloak into the fire—"

"Merlin, James, shut up, you're so loud—"

You hear Remus huff a soft laugh and you smile along: Your boyfriends are many things, but stealthy and discreet are not one of them. One would think the infamous pranksters of Hogwarts would be better at sneaking around in the dead of night—but then again, who needs to be light on their feet when there are charms and Invisibility Cloaks?

James and Sirius enter the common room as quietly as they can manage—which is to say, not that quiet at all—each bearing a large plate full of midnight snacks and drinks they've retrieved from the kitchen. (The house elves are always more than happy to see them.)

"Aw, look at them," Sirius murmurs to James, and he nods, a soft smile tugging at his lips as he looks at you and Remus. It's certainly a heartwarming scene, and you'd be content to stay there forever, but something's missing.

"C'mere," you whisper to the boys, holding your arms out and making grabby hands. "Cuddle."

They're more than happy to oblige, setting the plates on the table in front of the couches and piling on, Sirius leaning against Remus' shoulder and James sitting on the floor in front of you and Remus. You reach out and tug at his curls affectionately—he leans into the touch.

"We brought you your favorite chocolate cakes," James murmurs to you. "The elves made more just for you—even they know you love them. Oh, and Remus—there's pumpkin juice for you."

"Thank you," Remus says warmly, ruffling James' hair as he reaches by to grab a goblet. "Did you say hi to the elves for me?"

"Yeah," Sirius says, "they miss you and they're going to file for divorce if you don't visit them soon."

"Divorce? From all of them?" Remus' tone is laughing. "I don't think I could handle the legal fees."

"Who'd get custody?" you wonder.

"Besides, Moony knows he's married to us, if not legally but in spirit. When you think about it, Moony's a homewrecker," James jokes, and Sirius cackles in delight.

Your eyelids droop as Remus scratches along your scalp lightly, and Sirius catches you. "Hey, hey, wait, we're not sleeping yet. We have things to talk about."

"Talk about them faster," you mumble, and James laughs.

"Alright, alright," Remus says amiably. "We'll make it fast so you can get to sleep soon, alright? But you're gonna need to be coherent and awake right now, okay?"

"Fine," you whine, and you ease into a sitting position so you aren't tempted to fall asleep right there.

"Good girl," Sirius murmurs, and you shiver involuntarily.

"Okay, none of that right now—clear heads, all of us," Remus says. He looks at you and gives you a small smile. "There'll be plenty of time for that later."

"So how do we start?" Sirius asks. "Do we just... talk about what works, what doesn't?"

"I think we should start with the safeword." Remus hums thoughtfully. "You guys know the stoplight system?"

You and James shake your heads; Sirius nods.

"Green for go on, yellow for slow down, red for stop," Remus explains. "It's important to check in consistently, so we can be sure everything's alright."

"Wait, so yellow is..." You trail off.

"Yellow is, er, we don't need to stop, but I'm not one hundred percent comfortable or confident in what we're doing right now, so can we slow down and talk about it or change what we're doing?" Sirius explains, and you nod.

"Ah." You think about it. "Right, yeah, I think the stoplight system sounds fine."

"Same," James says, and Sirius voices his agreement.

In all your time at Hogwarts, the early years especially, never in a million years would you have thought you'd be here right now—in a polyamorous relationship with the troublemakers of the grade, discussing safewords and kink negotiations.

But what's life without a few surprises?

"We can all use the colors," Remus adds, "even if we're not the one subbing. Anyone can check in at anytime. Okay?"

Once that's been established, he pushes forward with, "Okay, so nitty-gritty: What are our boundaries? What do we not want to touch with a ten-foot pole?"

"No bodily fluids," James puts forth, "except for, well, you know. Just spit and come, I think. No blood or piss or anything like that."

You nod. "I don't wanna draw blood. Pain is okay, like bruises and bitemarks or the like, but I don't know about actual... wounds and stuff. For now, at least."

Remus nods. "Absolutely."

"Oh," Sirius says, looking vaguely bashful—which is a sight, because the Sirius Black, looking shy? "Um. I like to dom, right? Like usually, I do. But when I switch and sub, er, I don't like to be degraded. I love doing the degrading, but I don't know about being the degraded one."

Knowing Sirius' past, you understand completely. The rest of the Marauders nod as well, and James shifts towards Sirius, leaning against his leg in a comforting gesture. Sirius smiles at him, soft and affectionate.

"How about you, Moony?" you ask Remus.

"Hm." He thinks about it for a second. "I don't think I would want to do consensual non-consent."

"What's that?" James pokes at Remus' leg.

"Like, when you agree beforehand that a scene is going to be... Non-consensual. Usually, it's so the sub can pretend to struggle and protest and fight back and such. It's a fantasy, kinda like a coping mechanism, and I get it, and I respect people who do like it, but I don't think it's for me."

"So, all in all," Sirius summarizes, "No bodily fluids, no blood, no forced fantasies."

"Sums it up about right," James agrees. "And no degradation for when you're subbing."

"Yep."

"If at any time we think of something that we want to add to the hard-limit list," Remus says, "just say it. Even if it's the middle of a scene or anything, consider this a priority."

Sounds of agreement and understand come from the three of you.

"Also, just for a semi-reference," Sirius says, "I'm a switch, with a lean for being dominant. Remus is... I think, just dominant?"

Remus inclines his head. "I've never had the urge to sub, yet. Again, things might change."

Personally, you thought the idea of Remus on his knees, begging for the three of you, was very appealing, but that's up to Remus to decide.

"I'm also a switch, but I don't know if I have a lean," James pipes up. "I enjoy both equally, it just kind of depends on the moment."

Sirius nods, then looks at you. You're in the middle of leaning over James' head to nab a chocolate cake from the platter—the epitome of grace and dignity.

"I'm a switch," you say, chocolate cake in hand, "with a submissive lean. Like, I think... I think one day, I'd like to try to dom. Maybe. But usually I'm more than happy to sub."

"What a well-balanced group we are," James comments, and Remus snickers.

You yawn right on cue, and Sirius laughs. "Getting too tired, are we?"

"Yeah, but! I was absolutely clearheaded through all that. Fully concentrated. No distractions."

James eyes your chocolate cake.

"One distraction."

"I suppose we can talk about other things another night," Remus says, as your eyelids flutter again with tiredness.

"Other things?" James asks.

"Yeah. Specific kinks, stuff we'd like to try. Rules, corresponding punishments..." The werewolf winks at you. "Rewards."

"I like rewards," you murmur sleepily.

"For another night," Sirius agrees, yawning as well. He looks sadly at the two plates of goodies stacked on the table. "We got all that food for nothing."

"Nah, we can bring it back up to our dorm and charm it so it doesn't go bad," James says. "No worries."

"Right, right. Alright, you grab one plate, Remus grabs the other, I'll take her back up."

"Hey, why do you get to take her?"

"Because I said it first," Sirius maintains, like the dignified adult he is, and scoops you up before any of the other Marauders can protest.

You fall asleep that night on James' bed, in his warm embrace and surrounding by the calming sounds of your boyfriends' steady breathing. All in all, it hasn't been a bad night at all.

#marauders #marauders era #harry potter #hp #remus lupin #sirius black #james potter #marauders x reader #remus lupin x reader #sirius black x reader #james potter x reader #remus lupin imagine #sirius black imagine #james potter imagine #marauders imagine

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amysubmits · 3 years

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Hi Amy! I am in a serious, loving, long-term D/s relationship. I have been having an issue with my Dom during sex lately and thought you might have some advice.

Basically, often times during sex, I feel really silenced. We talk before and after about what I like, we have our safe words and non-verbal cues, but it's really hard for me to communicate what I want in the moment because he ends up feeling like I'm telling him what to do.

For instance, he was getting too heavy with impact and I told him I was too sensitive for that today. But I was thinking that I still wanted to him to be a little rough in a different way that he had also been doing, so I started to say "you can..." And he was immediately like "don't tell me what I can do." I honestly think he was just trying to be sexy here in a way that he thought we'd both like. Like I don't think he genuinely does not want my needs to be met. But I still felt silenced.

Other times when I communicate if I want something different, it's sort of treated as like a "break in the scene." He listens and changes things up but then there's like this "let's pretend that didn't happen" vibe. I don't like feeling like sex is a "scene..." I don't like that term because I don't want it to feel like role play. I want it to feel like us because it is us. Especially since D/s extends outside of sex for us. And I don't want to feel like using my voice is an "oops" moment or somehow an error.

So my question is... How can we create the space where he is still able to be dominant and mostly in control while still taking "feedback" from me throughout? And how can I help him let go of his pride which is resulting in this kind of sexual authoritarianism lol?

Thank you so much!

Hi :)

Maybe there are ways that you can communicate your boundaries in different scenarios, to avoid having to communicate them as much in the moment.

For example, if you know that you don't like doing impact play if you're still sore from a previous session, you could share that and then he'd know that anytime you're still bruised or sore that impact play should be avoided.

Or if there are certain kinks you sometimes enjoy but that are more emotionally vulnerable so you don't like doing them if you're stressed or sad, if he knows what those kinks are, he'll know to not try them on days where you've had a rough day.

So the general idea is to just express how your boundaries changed based on different scenarios, so he'd know upfront what is off limits and when, rather than trying to do them and you having to stop him.

Of course, it's not possible to set boundaries for every scenario so there's almost certainly going to be situations where you have to just say sorry, can't do X today, regardless of how many scenarios you try to negotiate ahead of time. I don't mean to suggest that is bad at all, but if you can reduce how often that happens it might feel better to you both.

Another idea would be to discuss with him if he'd rather that you just safeword if he's doing something that you can't handle that day. Maybe if you were to safeword rather than asking him to not do X, that might 'throw him off his game' less or let him maintain more of a feeling of dominance? For some people the wording (safewording vs using plain language) can make a difference in whether it maintains a feeling of D/s or not.

Those are my main two ideas for how to handle things you need him to not do.

As far as things that you'd like him to do, I think that is a lot messier because it comes down to your kink style, I think? I think some doms want their subs to not really request what they want in the bedroom very much in the moment. They'd rather lead the situation and have their sub go along with it most of the time. I think for some doms it's that submitting to the doms whims/wishes that really makes it exciting for them. If that's how his kink style works, but that makes you feel too silenced, and your kink style is that you want to be able to make requests fairly often, that may be tricky to work around. You'll have to discuss your different needs, how your different sexualities/kink styles work, and so on. You'll also want to consider if the feeling of being silenced by him having most of the say in what is done in the bedroom is hurtful to you and is something you can't tolerate, or if it's something you can be open to if it is something that is important to how kink works for him. Of course, the goal would be to try to find ways to mix your kink style and his.

If you do find that there is a difference in kink style, maybe you can do something like agreeing ahead of time if any particular day (or session or whatever) is one where gets to deciding what happens as much as possible as long as it isn't a limit, and then other times have days where it's more catered to you and you give more requests. Kind of a 'this one is more for you, the next is more for me' type of an agreement or something?

Hope something in here helped! Also just to repeat...the latter half of this is all based on the assumption that a lot of what is being requested/negotiated is wants/wishes/preferences, not limits. Consent is mandatory, of course. :)

#asks #d/s

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yesimgoingtopeacecorps · 5 years

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A Woman Is Not An Object or a Prize

As a female Peace Corps volunteer, there is no escaping it.

The sideways glances, the stares that last too long in your direction, the sigh you feel leaving your body when you're asked, yet again, if you are married or if you're dating anyone- and if you're not, "why not?"

There is a lot a person can get used to and become accustomed to when living in a foreign place. I am no longer phased by the fact that my toilet is simply just a hole in the ground, or that I have to wash my clothes by hand, or plans don't work out, or a three hour long car ride could end up taking me almost an entire twenty-four hours. Those are things that are easy to adapt to.

But the one thing that I will never fully adapt to? The one thing that continues to wear on me and chips away at the patience and acceptance I have built for other things in this experience? It's the feeling that no matter what, I am constantly looked at by men as an object, and I'm spoken to as if I have a buying price.

"Where is your husband?"

"Why are you not married yet?"

"My love, I love you, I want to marry you."

"Don't you want a husband? You need to start having children"

"Please, my darling, love me. We can go back to America together."

"If I was to marry you, you would be worth 1,000 cows. I would pay your father and he would be very happy."

"Hey baby, you are so sexy."

"Why are you not talking to me everyday? Is it because you do not want to be with me?"

"He is saying that because he wants to be with you, he does not mean any harm."

Let me be clear about something here, these aren't things I have heard from just Guinean man. I've heard it in all of my travels across the world. From my creepy rickshaw driver in Cambodia who picked me up from the airport, to the safari car driver in Tanzania where I worked for a summer, to my female host mother during my rural homestay in Uganda, who told me basically that “men will be men” when a drunk neighbor came by and wouldn't leave me alone. After awhile, this gross objectification starts to get to you.

However, I think the difference for me now is that in the past, the trip always ended. I would go home and was able to surround myself again with male figures and close friends who respect me as a human being and don't look at me like I'm a walking vagina and breasts.

I was able to build those walls up again and rebuild stronger each time, so that each new foreign experience, I started to care less about the stares, the crass comments, and the creepy actions towards me. I grew, I learned how to recognize these men and these situations, and I would brush them off or I would say something really brash and straightforward like "I want a husband someday but it won't be you." or I'd ask "Why is it necessary for me to have children?". I could say what I wanted and be as cold and detached as I needed to be if someone was making me uncomfortable or was being disgusting to me because, 9 times out of 10, I was probably never going to see them again.

I had these walls, these safeguards, and these skills I gained from over a decade of dealing with men out there who feel as if myself and other women are something that is owed to them. I came into Peace Corps with that fortress of self reliance under my belt and I was ready to take on what Guinea was going to throw at me. And let me tell you, in the last 17 months, the constant objectification has been bombarded on me.

The stares from men anytime I go anywhere, the constant comments from taxi driver asking me where my husband is (or if I want a husband, or can they be my husband?), having my photo taken without my consent, having to refuse invitations to men's homes, the persistent feeling of never fully being safe in a crowded male dominated space… the list could go on, and I know for a fact most other female volunteers I know have similar stories to share with you. It's gotten to the point where many of us just find it necessary for our sanity to straight up lie about being married or engaged to avoid further questions because, after the hundredth time of hearing "So if you are not married or engaged, you need to find someone here to marry." you stop wanting to have the argument of women's rights and choices.

But, all that said and done, those are the sort of instances and people I can deal with. Sure, they're exhausting, but I built those walls on purpose and they've kept me safe here. These sort of things exist everywhere in the world; as much as I individually do what I can to change those actions and inherited traits of these sorts of people, I try not to let them affect my life.

What exhausts me in the end, are the alarming number of men here whom I've put my trust in to not act that way towards me, and then having them betray that trust. They are the cannonballs among the pebbles being thrown in my direction and they are the ones that are wearing me down to a point of burn out.

Guinea, like almost all of the rest of the world, is a male dominated society. Unlike the culture I grew up in that has adapted and begun the journey of social equality for all, many Guinean men do not see women are their equals. It’s a culture where a bride price still exists, meaning simply that a woman literally has a monetary value assigned to her and her rights, her choices, and her body can be sold to the highest bidder. It is also a culture where, for the most part, the thoughts and feelings of the males in society are seen as the only ones that matter. But because I want to get work done, and because I want to make a difference, I grit my teeth and I grin through my gut-wretching feeling of wanting to run the opposite direction. I try to make friendships, develop work relationships, and have casual conversations with the opposite gender.

...Obviously the director of a branch of a major non-governmental organization in our area who works with my health center would be willing to work with me on helping to improve the capacity building of the community. We have so much to work on and he'd be a great work colleague. At least that's what I thought until I went to his house once on my way to my regional capital, just to chat, and he told me he wanted to "marry a beautiful American woman" and would leave his wife to do so, staring at me the whole time like a vulture waiting for his chance at the roadkill. Uncomfortable, I left and ignored his phone calls after that. He's since been moved to another posting in the lower part of the country.

...Of course this guy in my community who wants to work on organizing sessions for malaria trainings wants to just work with me because he cares about what I'm here to do… unless of course he's decided that by doing this with me, it was his way of telling me how much he loves me and wants to be with me. He said this to me over text message after a campaign that we did. When I didn't answer him and I started getting his six phone calls and fourteen text messages a day for a week, I finally had the doctor at my health center get involved and the harassment ended.

...There's no way that my friend and French tutor, a young, well educated, guy, would want anything more than my friendship and to hang out- until he asks me to dump the Peace Corps volunteer I’ve been dating so I could date him and when I said no, that I just wanted to be friends, he proceeds to stop speaking to me.

I’ll reiterate again, this sort of thing happens to women in America and all over the world; I'm aware it's not just a Guinean phenomenon of culture. But when my Peace Corps service has consisted of over ~80% of my interactions with male acquaintances always leading to me hearing a comment about my marriage status, or the 99.5% chance of me being nice to the taxi driver and then giving him my number to contact him for rides later, result in him constantly calling me asking to hang out, or, when I have at least a 1 in 2 chance of a man I'm trying to develop a professional friendship with, is thinking that working with me is eventually a way to get in my pants- you really begin to question whether you’re going to be able to make any difference at all.

So, what keeps me going on days that I feel like this? And feel like venting out about how I don't think things will ever evolve in this testosterone filled space I find myself currently apart of?

Every single day is a constant struggle to keep pushing back against these norms and keep allowing myself to trust people and let my guard down- despite being hampered with so many reasons to be jaded and shut the men out all together. But the reason I don't give up is there are men who are an exception the rule. By forming friendships with these men and having them embrace that fact that I am a human being, not an object or a prize to be won, it empowers them to teach others group them how to act and behave towards the opposite sex. It gives me hope that they will be the ones to change the ways of the next generation.

I see it in my friend Cissé, who's marriage I was a part of and who has constantly been working with me to start a girls' sports club.

I see it in my Chef de Santé, Dr. Bah, who always tells me about the importance of educating women and calls me his teacher.

I see it in my counterpart Mamadou, who has never once asked me about a husband or has ever made a pass at me in our year and a half of working together.

I finished writing this, and I went and stopped by my health center and sat down with Dr. Bah. Frustrated, I explained my feelings to him about how men act here. He said something to me that gives me hope. “Les hommes qui ne respectent pas les femmes ne sont pas des hommes bons.” The men who do not respect women are not good men.

So, because of them, and Guinean male role models like them, I keep moving forward. I keep finding ways to, cautiously and carefully, let the other gender into my life while I'm here. I keep going so that, maybe one day, men like my few Guinean male friends who respect me and respect the rights and choices of women, will no longer be the exception but will instead be the rule.

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circleknife14 · 2 years

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Bondage Rope For Sex

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#BDSM:Rope bondage:Kink:Fetish

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erhiem · 3 years

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Already pandemic memorial tattoos are on the rise: sound waves from the last voicemail before undergoing COVID-19 complications; a masked nurse like a god; “I survived a global pandemic and I just got this stupid tattoo.” But the coronavirus also changed how we’re getting tattooed in less obvious ways. A year of trauma has imprinted on us thoughts of solidarity and empathy, and shops and studios flooding in as customers – artists across America with doubling of inquiries and bookings compared to the summer of 2019 – have been a trauma-informed one. The approach is taking hold.

The country’s 20,000 tattoo shops close their doors for months, some all year. With the reopening, they are making up for lost income and postponed appointments. Clinical counselor and trauma therapist Jordan Pickel wasn’t surprised to hear that the Instagram bios of many tattoo artists read “Books Closed” for another reason. Not only did we experience a pandemic, but the global death toll continues to rise. Survivors’ guilt and surrounding anxiety are feelings that settle in the body and stay there, even if we don’t notice them. Covering the body with symbols to see is a form of resistance and an act of recovery after a crisis.

“When something traumatic happens, it can shatter a person’s sense of security or stability, the idea that the world is a just place. Tattoos communicate ‘I have changed’ or ‘my worldview has changed,'” ‘” says Jordan. “Healing from trauma is multi-layered and self-determined, which means you get to decide what your healing process looks like. Getting a tattoo can totally play a role in emotional transformation.”

Photo courtesy of Alicia Chung

“I protect myself by decorating myself. It’s armor,” says Alicia Chung, a 24-year-old art student and accountability facilitator in Vancouver, Canada. Since restrictions were eased last fall, he’s been getting new inks almost every week, often occupied by his growing network of friends in private tattoo studios who run a rotary machine. A lot of his pieces make no sense, and he thinks he might as well be stupid — a spider on his elbow, a mud gun with a halo, a sexy peanut, “fast and furious” above the crotch — but the point is Alicia Chosen them. “It’s my weird, twisted way of gaining autonomy.”

The sudden and complete absence of autonomy is the hallmark of the pandemic era. This is at the root of complaints from anti-mascars and anti-vaxxers. This seemed to be the central conflict – even more powerful than the disease – of the quarantine essays written from vacation homes. Our newfound autonomy in a now-reopened society is stressing us out, creating FOMO in some and a fear of being left out in others. Emphasis on self-determination has always been a reason for getting tattoos, but in the post-pandemic scenario it has taken on new meaning.

“When my studio reopened in August, I was worried that people wouldn’t come,” says Ocean Sing, an artist based in Brooklyn, New York. “But more people wanted tattoos than before the pandemic. I think there was a zest for practicing agency, and I ended up getting tattooed on a lot of designs that people said they wanted for years. “

Psychologically, periods of separation and pause can act as a value reset. “Many of us had never faced the reality of ‘life is short,’ which leads to ‘why not’ decisions,” Jordan explains. For those who had money left over from government stimulus checks after paying rent and debt, getting a tattoo was something exciting.

Part of why Alicia has been under the needle so often is that the restaurant they work at has temporarily closed, the school has gone virtual and parties have been cancelled. They had too much time and too little socialization. “That’s when I can take a little rest or allow myself to rest,” he says. “It got to a point where I didn’t mind spending the money to get them all” [tattoos] Because I’m paying for those four hours to be on the table and get professional service. We become intimate and vulnerable but it maintains this customer relationship because I am paying for their trust and interaction. And the isolated pain of a billion vibrations.”

As social beings, we have suffered the loss of non-pod contact. Ocean could still sketch in lockdown if he had the energy, but couldn’t tell Miyazaki to chat with a stranger about movies while by the bathroom. spirited Away on their back. (“I prefer customs these days because they’re so cooperative,” he explains.) We remembered our third-tier friends, the people we laid eyes on the subway from and the professionals we called expertise. was paid instead.

Photo courtesy of Ocean Sing

“Tattoos are an experience you’ll never forget,” says Detroit artist and shop owner Chrissy the Butcher, who’s engaged anytime in her 13-year career. “You’re nervous, the adrenaline rushing. People want that feeling again. i have designed [my shop] So that it’s so quiet, people can bring their friends… there’s a vibe to it.”

According to Jordan, physical intimacy is an important part of restoration even after trauma. “Being around other people is a way that we co-regulate, which means our bodies go back into a sense of groundedness and security. It’s not something we really do on our own. ” For artists who see themselves as healers, this understanding comes first.

Jude Le Tronick specializes in flora and fauna – as nature was “a major healer” in his life – and does freehand blackwork exclusively from private studios established in Seattle. “Freehanding is for me and for the client. I think it’s a respectful process to be fully present.” Judd, which provides free scar cover-up tattoo services to survivors of domestic or sexual violence, believes that tattooists are not therapists, but still have stories of inner pain emanating from their clients. There should be room for

In Tamara Santibanez’s phenomenal manifesto/guidebook/love letter Could this be magic? tattooing as emancipation, published in March and developed from discussion groups conducted during the pandemic, they claim that a tattoo shop has the potential to be a significant site of community building and change. Historically, that ability has been undermined by a masculine culture lacking tenderness. There’s a dispute between street shops and DIY private studios, between artists asking you for consent to shave and between artists who photograph your lower back while you’re oblivious. Lily, 20, knew that for a memorial tattoo of her cousin who died by suicide during the quarantine, she wanted to patronize a queer-led shop and get a tattoo done by a non-male artist. “When I was doing this I didn’t have to worry about anyone maybe attacking me,” she says.

We are in a unique moment of systemic change and the impact of the pandemic on the future of tattoo spaces is beginning to show. For many, this is taking a trauma-informed direction; For others, a selfish fight-or-flight. Pat Fish has been tattooing for 37 years, and she estimates that the dozen tattoo studios around the Santa Barbara Valley have shrunk to six since Covid hit. “I think everyone else is advertising on Craigslist that they’ll be visiting a house, a completely unwell condition. The major effect of the pandemic is that people realized ‘I’m going to have to inspect me once a year. Why should I pay $380 to the health department?’ They are not taking their responsibility as an agent of change seriously.”

“The old thing was you were grassroots because you want someone randomly walking to hear the sound, buzzzz, and to intrigue in the door,” Pat continues. “Now I think, ‘I don’t want you to move, who are you?’ If I’m going to have face-to-face contact with people, let it be that.

A safe space requires acknowledging the dynamic force between the tattooer and the client. When Ocean holds a stencil, for example, they tell the client it’s not a big deal to move or replace, they won’t go crazy. “When I was getting my first tattoo, I was afraid to ask for what I wanted. Even if you’re not traumatized, it’s a scary thing to be in a situation where a stranger might notice your presence. Changes forever.”

Getting a tattoo has always been scary for some people. Jade Bell is a Los Angeles tattoo artist and illustrator who grew up seeing her mother being deprived of shops for being a black woman. When they found an aspiring artist, they weren’t necessarily trained appropriately. “I literally saw a girl give my mom a keloid scar because she didn’t know how to work with darker skin tones,” Jade says.

America’s “plague years” included one of the largest protest movements in the country’s history, making it impossible to close the ongoing racial count. This resonated throughout the tattoo community, as Instagram infographics circulated resources for inking various skin pigments and white artists were singled out for a culturally appropriation flash.

Photo courtesy of Chrissy the Butcher

“People started to realize they had no black art [tattoo] collection,” says Jade. “I asked my partner, ‘Hey, can you name five Blacks’ [tattoo] artist’s?’ we could not. ‘What about five famous tattoo models who are black?’ We couldn’t think of anyone at all.”

Luckily Jade is a Virgo, so she was fearless at the idea of changing the culture herself. “I like to represent myself in the things I love. I had never seen black women drawn in the portrayal style that I see other women drawn all the time. I’m four-eyed black girls.” I am developing my universe.”

Chrissy the Butcher lives and works in Detroit, America’s largest black-majority city. Over the past year, she has seen ideas about race and society make their way onto the body. “Tattoos help people heal from generational trauma. It causes you to research the imagery presented by our ancestors. I see people getting African symbols with the turn of 2021, and I’m getting that tattoo. I’m building what I love and know, anything that relates to the black female form.”

A common counterargument is ‘Why remind yourself of your hardship on your body?’ “I’m thinking about it anyway,” says Kansas City physician Jesse Lee. “My trauma defines a lot of who I am and I was offended by it. Now I’m really happy [for it] Because I love who I am now.”

In February, Jesse got a bicep tattoo of a plant blooming from a can of tomatoes. For years, she pointed to her “nonsense childhood” without actually addressing it. When someone described her trauma to her as a jar of rotten tomatoes that gained more and more pressure over time, until the lid burst and the juices spilled everywhere, Jesse summed it up in a poem. Changed. After a one-year hiatus, in which she finally stuck with therapy and did things she wouldn’t allow herself to do as a fat woman – like roller skating, wearing crop tops, and considering her body a canvas – She was ready to make it a permanent reminder.

“People have experienced more trauma in the last five or so years than I think we have ever experienced collectively. Just by going to the Internet we are constantly digesting other people’s traumas,” Jesse says. A tattoo becomes a positive part of your story.”

It is beautiful to see collective grief metamorphose when we heal individually. “So much healing from trauma involves humor, at least for me,” Alicia says. “People ask me what I’ll think of my sexy Peanuts tattoo in 30 years. Maybe I look back and say to myself, ‘You could probably love yourself a little more, apparently it’s yours’ There was a way to compete. I think it’s nice to have a mark of remembrance for being a wrinkled old woman with a portrait made during a crazy time in the world.”

Follow iD on Instagram and TikTok for more culture.

The post The tattoo artists healing our collective trauma post-pandemic appeared first on Spicy Celebrity News.

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ouraidengray4 · 4 years

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So, You’re Interested in Sex Play (but Don’t Know Where to Start)

Compared to our swipe-right dating scene and all the totally NSFW shows on TV (looking at you, The Affair), your own sex life can seem as bland as a saltine cracker.

You’re just not quite as 4K as what’s on the screen — and that’s absolutely fine.

Ashley Armitage / Refinery29 for Getty Images

While you should never get wild just because pop culture tells you to, there’s nothing wrong with getting creative in the bedroom. “Research suggests that openness and spontaneity will lead to a lasting relationship,” said the late Kat Van Kirk, Ph.D., a former sex therapist and the author of The Married Sex Solution. “Don’t get caught up in judgments in your own head.”

And as you get used to talking candidly with your partner(s) about what you want to do (and what you’ve already done), it only gets easier. “A lot of partners really like empowered partners,” she said. “That exchange builds communication and respect.”

So, go ahead and be adventurous. After all, it’s sex play — emphasis on play. Here are a few tips to get you started.

1. Bring it up casually

All the experts we spoke with agreed that if you’re having trouble broaching the subject, you can let a movie, piece of erotica literature, or even a sexy song inspire you.

Jane Greer, Ph.D., a marriage and sex therapist, and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness From Ruining Your Relationship, suggests broaching the topic with I was reading this in an article or I saw this on TV.

Or the next time you’re strolling through a drugstore (it can be a little less intimidating than a sex shop), stop by the condom section, which often contains lubes and other small toys.

“Say, ‘Is there anything that you’ve always wanted to try?’ or ‘We’ll each get to pick one thing,’” says Logan Levkoff, Ph.D., sexologist and member of the Trojan™ Sexual Health Advisory Council. “You’ll get a little variety, and you get to see what someone else wants to try.”

2. Ease in with lube

One of the easiest things to incorporate is a lube. Usually water- or silicone-based, lubricants help everything feel more slippery.

“Water-based lubes are easy to clean up because the main element is water,” Levkoff says. They’re also usually cheaper than other kinds. The one drawback? Water-based lubes dry up faster than silicone-based lubes, which are thicker and tend to last longer.

“So, if you are engaging in water-based sex, such as getting it on in the shower, you’re going to want something that doesn’t wash off,” she says. “Or if you’re having anal sex, where lubricant is going to be important consistently, silicone-based lubricants can be a good option.”

Lubes come in a variety of flavors and sensations (think hot or cold), but it’s really all about personal preference.

One thing you should probably avoid? Anything with oil — including coconut oil or whatever else you’ve got in the kitchen. “I would never recommend anything genitally that isn’t designed to be used genitally,” Levkoff says.

Plus, oils erode latex (the material most condoms are made from). No bueno. If you’ve already used lube, you’re not alone. About 65 percent of women reported that they’d used lube before,Herbenick D, et al. (2014). Women’s use and perceptions of commercial lubricants: Prevalence and characteristics in a nationally representative sample of American adults. DOI: 10.1111/jsm.12427 and roughly 70 percent of men reported that they’d used lube too Reece M, et al. (2014). Men’s use and perceptions of commercial lubricants: Prevalence and characteristics in a nationally representative sample of American adults. DOI: 10.1111/jsm.12480 — usually to make sex feel more comfortable or pleasurable.

Give Trojan™ Lubricants H20 Closer™ a shot. The advanced water-based formula enhances your experience without getting in the way — or creating a sticky mess — allowing you and your partner(s) to feel closer.

3. If you want to try a toy, start with something simple

Gwyneth Paltrow would have you believe that you need a $15,000 gold-plated vibrator (you don’t). But there are way more accessible options out there.

“If you’re in a drugstore, you can try a vibrating cock ring,” Levkoff says. Vibrating rings fit over the penis and are safe to use with condoms.

“A lot of penis-owners end up really liking [vibrating] rings,” Van Kirk said. “And because they vibrate, you’re going to have clitoral stimulation, so no matter what position you’re in, everyone’s a winner. It’s not about one person or the other.”

No penis in the mix? No problem! Vibrating rings don’t have to be used genitally — they can also double as a massager, Levkoff says. Now that’s versatile (although they may draw the line at electric toothbrush).

4. Or skip toys altogether

While it can be exciting to introduce something new, you don’t need a toy to crank up the heat.

“It doesn’t have to be about bringing things into the bedroom,” Levkoff says. “It could be about changing the location. It could be pornography or an erotic book. It could be making the greatest playlist of songs that really turn you on — and two songs in, who knows what can happen?”

One other fun idea that won’t cost a thing? Sexy talk. Though it can be a little tough to get started — what can I say that won’t sound stupid!? — there are ways around that.

“If you read erotic lit or watch porn, you might find a phrase that makes you say, ‘That’s kinda hot,’” Van Kirk said. “Put it in your phone, write it down, whatever you need so you don’t forget. Start getting a script together.”

The main thing, Van Kirk said, is “you don’t want it to get too complicated.” She suggested aiming for one or two phrases that you feel comfortable saying, and trying those out first.

If talking seems like too much, “just start verbalizing during sex,” Van Kirk said. “Groans and moans — that sound response helps to get people used to using their voices during sex.”

Bonus: It also lets your partner(s) know they’re doing a good job.

5. Remember, communication is key

This one should hopefully be a no-brainer, but consent is key anytime you start pushing bedroom boundaries.

“If you’re into any kind of fantasy play or verbalizing play that involves saying stop, you need an option to actually stop play,” Van Kirk said. Simply put: You need a safe word. Even if you’re not into bondage or discipline, you may still need a way to let your partner(s) know it’s time to call it quits.

And if your partner(s) brings up something you’re just not into? Greer suggests saying, “I appreciate your fantasy, and I’d be willing to explore it with you by talking about it. But for now, that’s not something I’d be comfortable trying.”

By keeping it about your own discomfort, Greer says, you’re letting your partner(s) know there’s nothing wrong and no need to feel guilty or ashamed about bringing something up.

Sexual activity without consent

If a partner(s) refuses to stop when you ask them, initiates sexual contact without consent, or becomes physically or emotionally aggressive when you say no, you have experienced sexual assault.

If this happens to you, account for your physical safety first by leaving the premises, then contact 911, if that’s possible.

We’ve compiled a guide for people who’ve gone through sexual assault with the next steps you should take, organizations that can help, and crisis counseling contacts.

The bottom line

At the end of the day, it’s about what’s comfortable and pleasurable for you and your partner(s).

“There’s no way to be ‘advanced’ at having sex,” says Levkoff. “If you and a partner have sex in the same exact way every time, and it’s fun and fulfilling, then it’s kay.”

(And remember, research suggests that most couples have sex for an average of slightly more than 5 minutes — not a lot of time for boot-knocking creativity.) Most importantly, don’t agree to try something new just to avoid a breakup.

“Whatever you’re exploring should be done in the context of enhancing your relationship — building on what you already have,” says Greer.

Relationships change over time, as well — what turns you on at the beginning may not do so at the end. So, while you might want to try new things, you shouldn’t feel undue pressure to reinvent the wheel every month.

from Greatist Health RSS Feed https://ift.tt/35PwvJ8 So, You’re Interested in Sex Play (but Don’t Know Where to Start) Greatist Health RSS Feed from HEALTH BUZZ https://ift.tt/3mCr474

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rofics · 7 years

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Hidden omega (part 59)

Fandom: Bts (Got7 + Big Bang + B.A.P + Monsta X + Seventeen + Block B+Vixx+TVXQ+Exo) Who doesn’t love a good ensemble Pairing: Namjoon x Everybody Genre: Smut/Fluff/Angst Au: Canon / Omegaverse au Length: 4k

Chapter 1 ! Previous Chapter ! Next Chapter !

So when Namjoon entered the studio he had very specific things he expected to see when he entered the studio. He expected hard work, music and maybe some laughter. When he did not expect was Yongguk on his chair legs spread, head thrown back, eyes closed and his hand stuck in Himchan’s hair while the beta was eagerly sucking him off.

All three of the them all kinda froze, had somebody looked in it would probably have looked ridiculous. Namjoon having dropped all his thing standing with the door open and mouth open as well, Himchan looking with big open spelled eyes with Yongguk’s dick right next to his face and the alpha’s hand still having a firm grasp in Himchan’s hair.

While all 3 looked at each other like a deer caught in the headlight Himchan was the first one to speak up. “This isn’t what it seems like!”

“So… you were just washing his dick? With your best cat impression?” To be honest, yes he was a little shocked, which was mainly because the studio was a holy ground for Namjoon, and that couldn’t be hygienic!

While yes, it did still make him shy the thought of sex and stuff like that, but he wasn’t gonna run away at the sight. He knew that the rest of BAP was having smexy times! He had walked in on Jongup and Youngjae in the shower, which Namjoon was 90% sure was planned since normal people would lock the door. He had gotten dragged into the shower with them, which had almost caused him to be late for practice!

Himchan opened his mouth as if to speak, then closed it again… tried for words one more time, before once again closing it. In the end it was Yongguk who spoke up. “Are you sassing us?” his tone was full of well meaning humour.

Which made Namjoon feel more comfortable pushing his stuff into the room and closing the door behind him. “Are you about to have sex in the studio that other people have to work in, with the door unlocked so anybody could walk in?”

“There was a do not disturb sign on the door!” Himchan piped up, face still right next to Yongguk’s still hard dick, tip angry red and leaking precum showing that he had been close before Namjoon had decided to make himself known.

Yongguk just shrugged, he couldn’t stop his hips from chasing the warmth of Himchan’s breath as the other spoke. “And we weren’t having sex, we are just blowing each other… Bro jobs you know.”

That caused both Himchan and Namjoon to look at him with a raised eyebrow a frown that said ‘really?’ “Geez I’m sorry, don’t mind my bad jokes. Sorry for trying to lighten the mood it’s not like I am sitting here with my dick out feeling awkward.”

Namjoon had to agree that he was feeling slightly awkward as well, he had felt really swag and in control when he had walked in, feeling that he really had the hand up on the rest of them. But now that he was actually in the room he felt mostly awkward and not really sure what he was supposed to do. Luckily Himchan seemed to be more in control than both of the leaders. He cocked his head a little to the side and looked over Namjoon with an eyebrow raised. “Do you want to help me?” he gestured towards Yongguk’s dick that was still standing proud, also oh my god how had he not gone soft yet?

Namjoon was sure that he wasn’t suppose to still be hard, he looked surprised at Himchan. “Me?” at the sametime as Yongguk more or less squaked out. “Himchan!”

“Don’t act like you have never thought about it when we have been sitting here late at night working? Tell me that you don’t want me and Joonie to both be drooling over your dick sharing it like a lollipop?” So yeah Himchan turned out to actually be a leading expert in dirty talking.

And Namjoon would have to be lying if the thought didn’t turn him on, he already knew that he really enjoyed eating people out and while he hadn’t sucked a lot of dick he was pretty sure that he would really enjoy that as well, and that he would enjoy sharing with Himchan, yes that actually sounded really hot.

“You… shut up.” Yongguk mumbled, now having his hand covering his eyes like he couldn’t look at them and his deep voice somehow becoming even deeper with arousal.

Knowing that he more or less had gotten consent from Yongguk Himchan instead turned his attention to Namjoon. “What do you say Joonie? Wanna help?”

Namjoon couldn’t get himself to answer, feeling shy again. Well at least this time he had a good 5 minutes where he made it sound like he wasn’t a shy tall bean. That was progress, instead a small bump was heard as Namjoon’s knees hit the floor next to Himchan. Instead of answering the question he leaned forward to press a kiss to Himchan’s soft lips.

Well it didn’t really stay soft for more than a few seconds as Himchan eagerly took control of the kiss to map out Namjoon’s mouth and engage his tongue in a dance of passion. Namjoon could feel a hand being placed in his hair as well, more comforting than control, and he didn’t need to open his eyes to know that it was Yongguk’s, who seemed to have decided that he wanted to be part of it somehow.

For a few moments he let himself be completely controlled by Himchan and Yongguk. The hand in his hair guiding him and Himchan’s hands on his hips pushing him closer until air was needed for this to go on. Both Himchan and Namjoon’s eyes were hooded with lust as they looked at each other.

A light nip more onto Namjoon’s full bottom lip before the beta finally decided to give some mercy to Yongguk. He placed a kiss on the tip of the still very hard dick next to their faces, running his tongue over the tip Himchan managed to get a deep guttural sound out of Yongguk and a more soft moan out of Namjoon as the youngest saw the precum disappear into the beta’s mouth.

He couldn’t stop himself from taking Himchan’s mouth in a harsh kiss sharing the bitter taste between them. The taste of alpha exploding in Namjoon’s mouth as Himchan wrapped his tongue around the youngers.

Another moan from Yongguk and Namjoon could feel how his own erection was starting to push on his zipper at the sound of how deep the alpha’s voice became when he was aroused. “God you two looks so hot together like that,” his hand was still resting on Namjoon’s hair, but it was soft and not too hard especially compared to the matching one he had in Himchan’s hair guiding the beta.

Namjoon finally broke the kiss as he looked up at Yongguk eyes glazed over with arousal. “Harder please,” he couldn’t stop himself from asking, he wanted to be treated like Himchan, he could take it.

He couldn’t explain why he found it so arousing to have somebody control his moments. To let somebody else have the control. He had found the same thing with Daehyun, that while he loved eating out the other omega he prefered to do it while Daehyun had a tight grip on his hair and was grinding down on his mouth.

For a moment it looked liked Yongguk was gonna question it, but it seemed that he was smart enough to know that it wasn’t a good idea to question the omega. Instead just doing as the younger asked of him, tightening his grip on his hair. It was the first time Namjoon had actually vocalized what he wanted to anybody that wasn’t Daehyun and he wasn’t going to question it. It wasn’t like it was a weird kink for omegas. For majority of them submission came natural, and it really seemed to be a turn on for Namjoon.

Guiding the two youngers heads together again Yongguk couldn’t stop himself from moaning. The two were making out right next to the head of his cock and as the kiss was broken a string of saliva was connecting to two.

Both were going so easily turning their heads towards Yongguk as he guided them “You know that you can say stop at any time.” It was so important for consent, while yes Himchan knew that he could back out at anytime, it was even more important that so early on in Namjoon life as a sexually active omega he understood that he could back out.

Namjoon just nodded, licking his kiss swollen lips eyes fixed on the erection right in front of him. It was kind both cute and sexy as fuck to see the younger omega clearly wanting to suck him off. Yongguk was not going to lie that he had found Namjoon attractive even before he had presented as an omega, but he found many people attractive and he was never going to push himself on a dud. He was more than happy just being friends with Namjoon.

But as Namjoon presented everything changed, he could thank Jiho for the notice of telling them about the younger presenting, it was kinda impressive how quickly the news of Namjoon having presented spread in the idol world. Which shouldn’t really have surprised Yongguk, he still to that day had no idea how the information had reached Big Bang, but he guessed that he should be happy it did. Namjoon had told them about his conversation with Daesung and how the older omega had helped him realize that he didn’t ‘owe’ anybody anything, and it was important for his own health that he gave everybody a chance.

It seemed that Himchan the cheeky fuck had lost his patience as he stuck his tongue out to kitten lick at the tip once again. “Focus,” he teased Yongguk “you have two pretty guys on their knees in front of you and you decided to have a deep thought session instead?”

Yongguk tightened his hand once again in Himchan’s bleached locks having relaxed his grip a little as he had his little thinking session. Himchan was right though, his thinking session about how they all ended like that and how they all seemed so happy with Namjoon there and how he fit with them so well could really wait. “Oh I’m sorry that I want to make sure that I have consent.” His tone might sound snappy, but he knew that Himchan understood him as the beta licked his lips.

“Can we get on with it then, before Joonie drools on himself?” The omega seemed to wake a little bit up at the mention of his name as he raised his head looking directly into Yongguk’s hooded eyes.

“I understand,” good that Namjoon already seemed to understand that verbal consent was one of the most important things there was.

Yongguk smiled a little, which was hard because he was still so fucking turned on and he had two really hot guys close to his dick. “Good boy,” Namjoon almost lit up at the compliment and Yongguk might have filed that away for later.

Finally letting himself have what they all seemed to want he guided the twos head to his erection, letting Namjoon close his soft lips around the tip as the same time as Himchan was guided to the side.

After that it was pretty hard for Yongguk to really focus on what was happening around him. He did his best at helping guide the two heads while enjoying both the feeling and visual in front of him.

The two on the knees in front of him made an amazing picture which was only made better when Yongguk noticed that they were jerking each other off at the same time. Namjoon’s tiny omega dick almost completely disappearing in Himchan’s hand.

Namjoon was clearly doing his best to give back as much pleasure as he was getting, but with how little experience Namjoon had he was clearly struggling between focusing on jerking Himchan off while wrapping his tongue early around the tip of Yongguk’s cock. The alpha was more or less sure that if hadn’t been for the hand he had buried in Namjoon’s hair the omega wouldn’t have anything to ground him and help him focusing on the task on hand.

The picture of Namjoon and Himchan making out around his dick would without a doubt be forever stored in his brain for jerkoff material. While yes Yongguk would be lying if he said that it was the best blowjob he ever had (that honor went to Youngjae who wanted to see how it felt with Yungguk fucking his mouth while he was lying on the bed with his head hanging over the edge… which… yeah that had been amazing, he had fucked away Youngjae’s voice, but the beta seemed to think it was worth it. Then again, it would probably not have happened if Yongguk hadn’t lost control like a pup and knotted Youngjae’s mouth, which Yongguk could not be blamed for. He had tried to warn Youngjae, but he was not letting him go)

“Fuck close,” his body was fighting against itself, on one side it wanted him to close his eyes and enjoy the orgasm incoming another part of him didn’t want to tear his his eyes away from the view in front of him.

That seemed to make both of the younger much more eager as the did their best to push Yongguk over the edge. Himchan resting his hand on his naked thigh softly massaging it as to show him that it was okay.

A deep moan was released from Yongguk as he couldn’t keep it in anymore and he came, at the same time as Namjoon pulled of the tip which resulted in Namjoon getting a full facial and looking generally surprised at Yongguk with big wide open eyes.

Cum was hanging of Namjoon eyelashes, cheekbones and lips, and that was when Yongguk noticed that both of the younger had reached their climaxes as well. Or at least he thought so if the wet cum covering their fingers was anything to go by.

Namjoon licked his lips swiping the cum covering them into his mouth keeping eye contact with Yongguk. “Salty,”

“Yeah… you need to not do that.” Yongguk mumbled closing his eyes and leaning back in his chair head falling back. “You two might actually be the death of me.”

Of course Himchan didn’t seem to let him get away with that as Yongguk heard him push Namjoon down flat on the floor, and when he opened his eyes he was greeted with the sight of Himchan in his best erotic fashion licking the rest of the cum off Namjoon’s face while being a gentleman and tucking him back into his pants while zipping him up.

So yeah they were pretty much out to kill Yongguk’s sanity as he quickly closed his eyes again. Moaning low in his throat as his dick made an effort to get hard again. “Don’t you fuckign dare, just because they are being teases.” He mumbled half heartedly to his dick, because yes talking to your dick was a completely normal thing to do when one of your packmates, plus the guy you hoped to be one of your pack members were licking YOUR cum of each others faces. How was he suppose to deal with that?

Namjoon laughed at Himchan finished his cleaning with a kiss placed on his lips. With arousal having died down after his orgasm the kiss was soft and sweet instead, until Namjoon had to push him away. “Too hot.”

That just caused Himchan to laugh. “You know it.” before finally deciding to clean himself up as well, before getting up to kiss Yongguk as well. “Are you still alive or did we finally manage to suck out your soul through your dick.”

“Fuck you,” was all Yongguk mumbled dick still out as he was rubbing his eyes trying not to get hard.

Then there was Namjoon who spoke up. “Aw come on! I like these jeans now there is a wet spot!” Only for Namjoon to turn around and show that yes indeed he had somehow managed to produce enough slick to actually make a wet spot.

Needlessly to say. They got a good amount of work done that day, yes most of the things they managed to write was 18+, but technically it was work? Right? They wrote songs… Okay they didn’t get much work done.

Also it turned out that Namjoon got a little (a lot) affectionate after smexy time and he was happy sitting on Yongguk’s lap while writing. Which yes Himchan got a lot of pictures of which was happily shared in a group chat with other idols emotionally invested in Namjoon’s life.

There was food when they got home, which made everything much better because food. The mood in general was nice, warm and comfortable. Namjoon had spent multiple years now not getting the closeness he needed after returning home from a long day, and it was nice and relaxing to just standing brushing his teeth having Junhong wrap his long arm around his waist resting his head on top of him smiling to him in the mirror. Or Jongup pulling him into a game of Overwatch without complaining that Namjoon was to bad, instead just enjoying the time with him.

He had started to get used to his time with B.a.p. He enjoyed spending time with them, he liked going to bed and waking up with them , but everything was temporary until Namjoon made a choice. As he was dragging his shirt over his head because god knows everything was being too warm Daehyun spoke up. “Don’t see this as me wanting to get rid of you, because if it stood to me we weren’t going to let you go, but you said you wanted to spend some time with everybody before you had to leave for Japan.”

Namjoon had said that, he wanted to be fair not just to himself but to everybody else as well. He wanted to split his time between the packs who had all somehow decided that they actually felt that he would maybe fit into their pack.

“Yeah… you are right,” he had already been with b.a.p a few weeks, but it felt like so much more since so much had happened and everybody had been so good to him.

He sat on the edge of the bed. “It’s the right thing to do… I… I want to be fair, but I don’t want you guys to think it is because I want to leave, or that I haven’t enjoyed my time here.”

For a second everybody was silent and still in the room, until a certain baby alpha decided he was done playing a game of silence. “Namjoon we all knew that this was temporary for now.” He wrapped his arms around the omega hugging him close from behind, it was the first time in a long while they had actually called him by his name. Normally he was just sweetcheeks or just Joonie. “We don’t expect you to just want to join us now, nor at anytime. Yes we hope for it, but if you told us now we would know you hadn’t thought it over. We know this is important, and we care about you. We knew this would happen and we are okay with it, go spread your wings.”

The rest of B.a.p agreed and that night Namjoon slept in the middle of a giant puppy pile, knowing that this would be the last time in a while that he would be sleeping with B.a.p and he wanted to keep them close.

The next day Namjoon was to leave, he had already had a call with Block B since that was where he was gonna stay next, and they had seemed happy and eager for him to spend the time with them.

Namjoon had decided that he first of all was going to spend a day or two home alone getting his stuff and thought in order. He knew that he had been terrible at being alone last time, but he was pretty sure that he would be better this time.

Going down the line hugging the members and getting kisses and nuzzles in return was kinda sad in the end. While Namjoon wasn’t sure if B.a.p was it for him, because nobody could really explain what knowing that it was YOUR pack really felt like, but he knew he really liked them if not loved them.

His hug with Junhong was extra tight from both sides as Junhong mumbled a very quiet thank you that only Namjoon could hear. Namjoon couldn’t stop himself from smiling like a proud little bean since Junhong had actually taken his advice.

His goodbyes with Daehyun, Youngjae and Jongup was while still sad a lot more cheery as well. They reminded Namjoon that even if he didn’t end up with them, this wasn’t goodbye forever, and even if everybody else found Namjoon terrible at video games Jongup and Youngjae would still play with him. Why he had no idea, but bless their souls. And he knew that he would forever have a bond with Daehyun since he kinda felt like his Omega teacher in a same way that Daesung did… It had to be a Dae thing.

The last in the line was Yongguk who’s hug was somehow even more fierce than Junhong’s and another thank you was given and Namjoon knew what it was from as he whispered back. “Remember you promised to tell them, but I also understand why you can’t right now. Just… I think it is going to work with Junhong now, tell them after. When I come back to Japan you better how told you or I will whup your ass.”

“I’m taller and stronger than you.” Yongguk teased as he lifted Namjoon off the ground teasingly.

It caused Namjoon to laugh before he kissed his friend one more time. “Admitting you need help isn’t being weak, it’s being strong. And even if you need a break… everybody will understand, they love you.”

One last group hug was shared between them before Namjoon was on his way home. It was bittersweet leaving, while he didn’t want to leave. He also looked forward to spending time with Block B, it was always easy to forget that two of the members knew Namjoon longer than ANY of the BTS members… Yeah maybe that was gonna be good for Namjoon, but he also kept Bang PD-nim’s word in mind. A pack wasn’t just the two he knew for so long, but all of them. He couldn’t forget that.

He smiled for himself as he threw his hoodie across the room because fuck the heat, it was going to be okay… he was going to be okay…

While Namjoon might be okay, Hoseok was planning murder in the other end of Seoul…

Target: Hyunseung

Authors note:

Boi oh Boi, Hoseok here we come! bap arc done!

- Prussia

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