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#you've got lust for a person and their station so much that if you can't have them you'll consume everything and still be left wanting
the-nettle-knight · 4 months
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Saltburn makes me wanna throw up. Not because it's perverted (it's not really, it's just got a little cinnamon). No it's got so much symbolism and folklore in that it makes me wanna vibrate out of my skin and I'm not even a folkorist
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olderthannetfic · 14 days
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You recently mentioned that you've been out since your teens. As a person who managed to overlook a shitton of signs and only realized she was bi in her early 20s, I am wondering how you realized you were bi and also how you found out bisexuality exists?
Sorry if the phrasing sounds weird, I only noticed I was bi because I stumbled over the term on tumblr in 2016 and was like "oh, that's possible??" and then my earlier identity crises during my teens due to feeling attracted to multiple genders and being like "I'm crushing on [female person]. Am I lesbian? Nah, I've also felt attracted to [male person]. But I can't be straight either because this attraction feels the exact same. Am I broken?" were suddenly resolved with the realization that bi is also an option and that I'm not broken due to zigzagging between heterosexuality and homosexuality, but rather just bisexual. In retrospect, it's absolutely ridiculous that it took me so long, considering that as a kid I had crushes on Anna and Carter and Doctor from Harvest Moon: Friends of Mineral Town, and Vitani from Lion King 2, and back in primary school, I used to go to the kids' section in the library and look at the first pages of a sci-fi comic which had one or two women get out of a lab or space station thingy and go bathe in the nude in the first few pages. I don't remember what it was called or what it was about, but tbh I'd love to find it and actually read it properly this time lol.
--
Horniness. The hornier you are, the easier it is to notice.
But also... well...
The 80s were all about combating the AIDS crisis and trying to get basic recognition of the humanity of gay people (at least in the US circles I was familiar with). The 90s saw the rise of a much more organized bi rights movement.
And then we backslid.
In the 2000s and 2010s, interest in bisexuality as a distinct thing fell off a cliff as far as I can tell. The "hey, it's not just cis gays and lesbians" energy moved first to trans topics and then to asexuality but without bisexuality joining the stodgy old guard.
The 90s were different. I was hitting my teens just as Anything That Moves hit its stride. I bought that shit at the bookstore. Yeah, this was the Bay Area, but they carried it at all the regular bookstores, not just the gay ones.
On Usenet where I spent a lot of my tween years, one of the big groups was soc.bi. I even spotted them having an in-person meetup in a restaurant in Berkeley where I happened to be having dinner with my parents. I didn't go say hi because I was like 14.
My big eureka moment, though, was on alt.tv.x-files when two groups were having a satirical argument about who enjoyed The X-Files more: people who got to lust over David Duchovny or people who got to lust over Gillian Anderson. Someone showed up and was like "Hah! I get to enjoy it twice as much as all of you! I'm bi!"
I was like "That's a thing????" I'd grown up with very liberal parents and lesbian neighbors, but like a lot of boomers, my mom was pro-gay and deeply clueless about all other queerness.
--
So the answer is unsupervised internet access in an age with no algorithms plus things like bisexual magazines actually existing.
RIP Anything That Moves.
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ry0chann · 2 years
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No. 84 from smut list 2 with service Dom! Erwin x fem reader? Thx bby(~ ̄³ ̄)~
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#84 — “If we weren’t in public right now I’d have my head between your legs.”
WARNINGS: fem!reader, smut, modern au, established relationship, public sex (technically), a bit of fingering & clit stim, orgasm denial
WORD COUNT: 0.9k
NOTES: this ended up so much fucking longer than i wanted it to be but it’s fineeee
send me prompts!! | m.list
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It wasn’t often the two of you went out like this — work kept the man busy, which unfortunately meant you didn’t get much time for evening outings. Tonight, was the exception. Erwin had come home at a decent time, and quite enthusiastically asked you out on a date to some fancy restaurant. It was a simple gesture, but endearing nonetheless.
Here you were now, sitting beside him in the comfort of a booth towards the back of the restaurant. Normally you’d sit across from him, but he wanted you next to him tonight. You didn’t question it, you figured he just wanted you close. Though perhaps sitting so close was a mistake.
His palm rests on your knee, his thumb lightly caressing your skin. The food had already been ordered and you’re both now waiting for it arrive, sipping on the white wine Erwin so kindly purchased. There’s an incoherent chatter in the room, filling the silence of your personal space until the man beside you decides to break it.
“I know I’ve already said it, but you look gorgeous tonight.”
You smile at his compliment, turning your head towards him. His other hand comes up to cup your cheek and he leans in for a kiss. The hand that rests on your leg suddenly starts to drag up your thigh as he kisses you, calloused fingertips brushing against your soft skin and making you shiver.
Erwin’s lips part from yours, just enough for him to whisper close to them.
“If we weren’t in public right now I’d have my head between your legs.”
Your face heats up at his statement, your heart suddenly beating much faster. He chuckles deeply, as if he hadn’t just said something lewd, giving you another quick peck before giving you some space. Erwin wasn't the type to joke about things like that — if he said it, it's because he meant it.
"I think you've had too much to drink, mister." you tease, trying to laugh off his comment.
He simply shakes his head, taking your jab too literally and informing you that this glass is his first. His eyes appeared dark somehow, holding a lustful glare. It intimidated you. You couldn't help but get a little antsy thinking about what he'd be doing to you if you were home.
Erwin kisses you once more, unable to contain his urge to. His hand remains stationed on your thigh, inching under the hem of the dress you wear, dangerously close to your panties. You don't mean to, but you whimper into the kiss he has you trapped in, pulling away embarrassed.
"Something wrong?" he asks, smirking knowingly.
"Not here..." you murmur, sipping on your wine in attempts to calm down.
He steals a kiss to your cheek, staying there a moment.
"What is it you want, darling? Because I have no problems toying with you now..."
His words weren't doing your nerves any favors, your leg beginning to anxiously bounce under the table. You'd think he was kidding, but he wasn't — that's what had you conflicted. It'd be a lie to say he wasn't working you up and you wanted him, but would it really be smart to act on it?
Well, whether it was smart or not was a concern you quickly forgot. One kiss to your neck made you melt, luring you in and getting you to beg him for more than what he was giving. Erwin was delighted, to say the least. The man wastes no time brushing his fingers against your clothed sex, eliciting a whimper.
"Dirty girl," he purrs in your ear, "Knew you couldn't wait till we got home."
You sigh shakily, poorly attempting not to squirm too much. He'd avoid kissing your neck the whole time, wanting to avoid being that couple that can't keep their hands off each other in public. Little did everyone around you know though, your seemingly modest boyfriend was currently slipping his hand into your panties under the table.
You gasp, chewing your lower lip as he rubs your bare clit. It was embarrassing how wet you were from such little contact. His fingers would drag through your slick folds, tantalizingly. You close your legs but he swiftly hooks his ankle with yours, keeping them open.
"Ah ah, let me make you feel good." he coos, pushing a finger past your dripping slit.
Your hand comes up over your mouth, muffling the squeak you let out. A tiny kiss is placed at your jaw, Erwin groaning softly when he feels you tighten around his finger. It pumps in and out of you agonizingly, slow enough to make you antsy. He inserts another finger and you swore you'd moan loud enough for everyone to hear.
Not once did he speed up, maintaining his unhurried momentum. Your hips rock back and forth slightly, trying to feel him a little deeper. It was nearly impossible not to whimper out his name, not to let yourself go and truly enjoy the pleasure. You mutter out a "please," needing him to give you more.
He chuckles at your eagerness, starting to quicken his pace. His thick fingers stretch you perfectly, drawing out quiet whines from you. You hold onto his wrist for any type of leverage, feeling orgasm growing nearer. Perhaps it was the setting you were in that made it come so soon, or maybe it was just the excessive adrenaline running through you.
Erwin could tell you were on edge, disappointingly removing his fingers. He wipes his them clean on your thigh, kissing you softly.
"You're not allowed to cum here, sweetheart. Wouldn't want you making too much of a mess, now would we?"
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r0-boat · 2 years
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a thing thing for youuu
imagine abo submas 'assisting' omegas going into heat/pre heat in the subway by hiding them away in their office. one keeps watch and calls for assistance, while the other keeps them busy via intensive oral. they can't get too involved with them, as they could fly into a rut regardless of the suppressants they're on. it's considered an honor and experience to be in heat on their subway, and no omega is left unsatisfied.
that is, until you. a repeat subway user who'd gotten friendly with the bosses because of their pleasant personalities. both of them seem very fond of you, eagerly awaiting your arrival and departure each day.
you've finally run out of suppressants today. you're halfway off the tracks to get a fresh supply. pre-heat burns low in your belly, igniting your scent and it's potency makes your eyes water in embarrassment.
both bosses are on the other station when you depart, and they're both staring at you intensely.
You left this A little unfinished bestie I got you💕💞
They quickly rushed to the office. ingo holding you close to his chest while Emmet growls straight Alphas that are stepping out of line and getting a little too close to you.
When they reach the office Ingo seemed like a little too excited to eat you out. Emmet heared low growl coming from his brother that was satisfying you...he's getting on top of you?!
Emmet immediately put down the phone and pulled his older brother back. Ingo's eyes were clouded over with lust was now whimpering begging in it to let him go to let him mate with you. This was... uncharacteristic for his older brother usually he's the more reserved Alpha.
Your heat has fully taken you over "please! I need alpha please!" Ugh your sweet scent begging does not help.
Emmet must stay calm no matter how much the idea of another Alpha claiming you makes him angry, no matter how much his brain is screaming at him to "claim them now, finally make them yours"
Fuck you...smell so good, and you're cute begging, maybe just the tip?
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his-saiko · 1 year
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The Summoning
— Past the Edge
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"Raise me up again. Take me past the edge!"
You weren't supposed to be anywhere near this man's path. But there was something about you that seems so compelling. Curiosity? Lust? Threat? He just has to know. Whatever it is, there's one thing he is definitely set on. He wants you and he's not so easily distracted from that goal.
— Dabi x f!oc/reader. Enemies to ?
C/Tw. themes of harm, intrusive thoughts [All possible triggering content will be enclosed in !'s]
3.1k+
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You wake up from where you were last night. You rub and wipe the traces of your sleep off your face and turn on your telly. It was already on the news talking about a burn victim near the train station.
"Just a few blocks away from XO Station is a burn victim, leaving almost only its skeleton behind. DNA tests say that this is a 38-year-old villain, "Gombei" Yamada Taro with a history of robbery and public misdemeanours."
"Like most of the victims, he seems to have suffered temperatures surpassing 3000 degrees celsius but unlike the others, the fire was controlled and isolated. Nonetheless, we suspect that this is made by the same culprit from the Cremation Case."
You take a moment to process what you are taking in. You swear that you only knocked the thief out. Your mind comes back to Dabi.
You look at the scene and evidence shown on the screen. You are sure yourself it was him but the flame was controlled. Does that mean he burned the victim while he was unconscious? This murderer definitely has no limits.
You question how you even got to studying this criminal in the first place. But how can you not? You really like true crime topics and the League of Villains is one of the trending topics right now. Their whereabouts, their possible plans. The rise of villains flocking to them. But why him?
You look down at your hand and move your fingers. You were so sure you'll be getting a fire quirk or a blood quirk like your parents but when Hysteria manifested everything just went downhill.
Your mind replays Dabi's words. "Maybe he is right about me..." You shake your head. "No, he can't be. You never have any records of felonies like him. You're not a criminal. You don't do anything to intentionally harm people like them."
You push yourself off your seat and start making your breakfast. You start to dread the day that hasn't started yet. It's been months like this where you push yourself into doing the most mundane things as if you're forced and in the past few weeks the burden of it has been worst. At least you're working from home as accommodation from your employers.
Dabi waits by his latest scene away from the eyes of other people. He has his hands folded over his mouth as he anticipates for your arrival. He can't help but grin as he feels his heart beating so much as if it will burst out of his burned chest. Who knew he can also feel a different kind of heat like this?
He plays your encounter in his head over and over again. Your show of strength isn't just physical. There was something about your mental strength. Living like any other person was difficult enough for him that he had become a villain but you... You've been enduring this for almost all your life and you're still blended in with these losers. Like a spark among the tinders. A little push and he can see how big the flames will be once you start setting them. The thought of it just heats his whole body that he feels like he could lose control of his quirk.
He keeps waiting but hours go by and he is not a patient person. "Fuck this." He leaves his spot and goes back to the base. He shuts himself in one of the spare rooms and lets loose.
Skeptic opens the door and almost gets flamed. Dabi stops and looks at Skeptic. "What?"
"I got information on her. You're lucky the picture was clear. She's just an office worker."
"Nothing else?"
"Her quirk was undetected for most of her life but it seems to be manifesting only now. It seems to be some sort of hysteria. There isn't any medical or psychological records that indicate anything about it."
"What are these then?" Dabi points to a file with a logo of a hospital.
"Some lab results. She came in for a possible heart condition but the results say everything is fine. Why are you so interested in her?"
"Are you sure she isn't a villain?"
"No. The police don't have any records."
Dabi huffs. "I'm going out again."
"We are supposed to lay low."
"That just means to not get caught. Relax."
You finally come back to the scene. A place that shouldn't exist. "Am I going to get linked into this? God I hope not." "Dammit—" you hang your head and massaged it— "A person died and that's the first thought you make." "What the hell is the dead going to do?" "They can't do anything anymore... It's unfair..."
"What is?"
You jump and see Dabi. "You are." You blurt out. "What did this man ever do to you?"
"Wasn't he the one who was about to do something to you? A thank would be appreciated."
"I scared him so he'll be scared to do anything like this again. You killed him."
"So he won't kill anyone else after." Dabi rolls his eyes. "See? Problem solved."
"No, it's not a problem solved it's just another problem made. I was the last person he saw. I can't have this be linked to me."
"You don't seem like a fire type."
You hold back your tongue. You can't make up anything to make a point. This man already saw your quirk.
"Well, if you do get caught, I know a place you can go to."
"What? Your League?" You snide. "I'm not a criminal."
"You're right. But you're definitely misunderstood." He leans in closer so you could see eye to eye. "Has anyone been on your side your whole life?"
You dart your eyes away and turn your head. "I never saw you here." You quickly walk away. You feel your heart pounding. You seek shelter from the hood over your head. You run until you bump into someone. You swing your arm instinctively but you are met with a red feather. "Hero!" You immediately deactivate your quirk. "I'm sorry."
"Sorry. I guess I really shouldn't be going to people's houses unannounced."
"Are you here for my report last night?"
"Yes, I was going to ask if it was the one that got burned last night."
"Yes..." You hang your head. You hold on to yourself as you ready yourself in facing the consequences. "I thought that he'll be fine after I knocked him out but I didn't know he was killed. I'm sorry."
"You... knocked him out? With your quirk?"
"No." You shake your head. "I just scared him with my knife." You pull out your blade. "Do not mention details." "Ca— Can I ask for a favour?"
Hawks waits for you to tell him what you want. "If heroes are what the people say they are, then this wouldn't be a difficult thing to ask of them right?" "Please catch the man who burned him. The villain who robbed me wasn't supposed to die."
Hawks smiles. "We'll do what we can miss."
"Fake smile. Fake." You lose heart at your own thought. "Who am I kidding? They're humans. Just like us." "Thank you." You bow your head.
"You can have this." The feather aimed at your head softened.
You hold out your hand and let the feather fall on your palm. "Wouldn't you need this?" You ask but immediately question your own logic. You're looking at a man who has wings. Feathers can grow.
"I have more." Hawks's expression changes. "Don't worry." He looks to be stifling his laughter but his eyes are gentle as he looks at you.
You watch as his wings spread and fly away. You would understand to cross paths with a hero. But someone as prominent as Hawks? Even more unnerving is Dabi crossing your path more than once.
You look down at the feather. "Why would you leave your feather here?" You stare at it intently. "Are you some kind of calling card?" You brush your finger against the tip of the feather. Doing so made it feel like you are doing something wrong. "Sorry. I'll just put you on my desk." You tell the feather like it's another sentient being. You do as you promised.
You lay down and stare at the ceiling. You feel something. Like some sort of anxiousness or excitement about what could happen. Something like this makes you feel like you're in a movie or a book. You raise your hand and move your fingers. "I'm real, right?"
Your mind goes back to the blue flames. Your brain didn't need to form a thought you felt what you want. "I wish I could see them again." Your mood sours as you acknowledge it. You need to find a different subject to pour your attention to.
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"Thief!"
You stagger as you get shoved by a runner. You grab their shirt but your grip isn't strong enough. You would have fallen if you hadn't caught yourself. "Dammit!" You look around and see the bystanders just looking on. "Is this really our reality now?" You pick yourself up and prepare yourself to run but you see everything being brought back to where they come from.
"It's Hawks!" People cheer as he descends down.
You huff and go on your way.
"Oi~"
You feel the breeze shift as he passes you. "I meant to check up on you."
"Sir, You have been doing so these past few weeks. It's starting to feel like I'm under surveilance."
He chuckles and scratches his head. "You caught me. You sure have sharp senses."
You feel your face fall a bit at the compliment. You feel as though your sharp senses can be credited to your paranoia.
"Hmm. Are you bored?"
"Sir?"
He chuckles again. "You really shouldn't call me that. Hawks is just fine."
You think for a bit. "Did I do something to be under probation? Is it because of the Cremation case?" "Did he find out that I met Dabi more than once?"
"Well, you are a person of interest."
"Are you after Dabi?" You both stop. His silence was almost deafening. "Am I really a target now?" You say as you drop your shoulders. Hawks doesn't say anything. You feel your chest starting to tighten. "What's happening? Is this really happening? What's going on?" "I need air." You hold out your hand to excuse yourself and look around to see where you can run to.
Hawks grabs you and lifts you off the ground. You hold on to Hawks and look down. "Si—Sir— Hawks! I didn't mean 'take me to the sky!'"
"Relax. I won't drop you." He puts you down at the top of a tall building.
You look over to see how high you guys are then give Hawks a look.
He shrugs. "No one will bother you here."
"You could have sent your sidekicks to watch over me. Why are you here?"
"Because it's faster to apprehend the villain if I'm the one on stand-by."
"So I'm bait?"
"No. You're— a person of interest."
"But I didn't see anything or know anything the public doesn't know."
"No, but someone did take interest."
"Should I tell him it was Dabi? I guess he already knows about it. But I can't just give out information unless they asked. And not until I know I'm safe." "Hawks... What is a hero to you?" You look at him.
"Someone that gives people a chance for a brighter future."
"A brighter future." "A brighter future..." "A brighter future?" "What does that look like?" You take a step. "A brighter future... Bullshit." "I think I'm just gonna go."
"What? Wait—"
It was a despicable thing to do. You knew a pro-hero would save you from this. You honestly don't know exactly why you did what you did. For a moment though it's as if all your troubles are blown away by the wind. Though, something was faster than that.
Hawks catches you. "What did you do that for?!"
You held your tongue. He might start to think it was out of guilt or something but you just really don't know why. You know how it might have looked in his eyes as well. "Manipulator. Attention seeker." "I... I don't know..." You say truthfully. You stare at each other for a moment and there you both know. You are telling the truth. "I wanna go home... Please..." You mutter. Hawks doesn't say anything else and carries you home.
You quickly open your door and shut it close behind you as you go in. You collapse and try to calm yourself down. "What was that? What was I trying to do? Why did I do it?"
You've been plagued with such thoughts for the majority of your whole life but you thought that you would never do it because you never had a history of attempts.
"Why did you do it? Is it because a hero was there?" "Fuck..." You bury your face and cry.
You wake up in the same position you remember you were in. You scramble for your phone and see that you only dozed off for a moment.
You stand up and look in the fridge. It was empty. "Has it been that long?" You look at your sink and see the lone pot that you have been using more than anything so you could avoid washing multiple things. You wash the pot and put it on the stove. You look for a pack of ramen but you're all out of it too. You hang your head low and stop yourself from breaking down even further. "It's okay. It's okay. It's fine. We can just go to the store and buy a pack."
You change your clothes and get your wallet and keys. Your eyes land on your phone. Something tells you to bring it but you know that you wouldn't be out too long so you brush it off and take note to be back immediately.
You do your errand quickly and hurry back to your place. You set everything then wait for the water to boil. Your mind plays back to what happened earlier but your brain is changing the details. You're imagining that it was the villain who saved you.
You catch yourself staring at the boiling water. You scramble to get the noodles and soup packet in it. "Fuck this isn't right. What is going on with me." You hold your head. "I can't be getting fixated on a villain."
Your mind plays the blue flame dancing around you during your first encounter. It was warm and part of you believes that they weren't there to hurt you. It felt like they were there to protect you. You shake your head to let go of the thought. "That can't be right. He's a villain." "A monster..." "And you're not?"
"I can't be..." Your eyes blur.
You leave your place after eating through your tears. You need time alone— as if you never got that— so you go to sit under the bridge.
Your time here is different from any other when you're on your own. The water shining, the cars passing over you, the cold breeze but you forgot to bring your hoodie.
A spark makes itself known to you. You try to figure out what or who it was but you recognise it immediately the then spark turns into a blue flame.
You gasp and hold your breath. "Dabi."
"Hey. Cold?"
Your mind was telling you to run but for some reason, you couldn't move. Is it fear? But you're not actually breaking into a sweat here. Is it curiosity? What more do you want to know about a criminal? Your eyes look at the fire blazing in his hand. "There it is..."
He walks closer and holds his hand out. You raise yours but your voice of reason makes you step back.
"C'mon. I'm not gonna hurt you."
"Even if you don't, your fire will." You retort.
"Well, at least you're not stupid. But you do seem to like my flames."
"If you see it as that I guess..." You murmur.
"So where have you been?" Dabi gets to the point as he tilts his head at you.
"What?" You look at him in confusion.
"Haven't seen you snooping about where I was. I had to follow you just to see you again." Dabi clicks his tongue. "But you seem to be preoccupied with someone else."
"What I do is none of your business."
"Don't be like that." He smiles.
"I'm already putting myself in harm's way by pretending I never saw you. I've done my part. Now, do yours."
"I never asked you to not report me to the heroes but, you know—" he shrugs— "be my guest. They probably know already that's why they're watching you."
You choke. He's right. A top-rank hero wouldn't let this slide easily but if Hawks wanted to you'd already be under full probation. Unless... "I'm bait." You look around but you'd feel it if someone is watching you. Then again, you didn't notice Dabi until he made himself known.
"You need to leave... me alone." You walk away. "Whatever war you have with society has nothing to do with me."
"Oh does it now?" He cackles. "So you're not trying to hide anything from the rest of the world so they can be comfortable at your expense?"
You stop.
Dabi walks towards you. The hairs on your neck stand on their ends. Shivers run down your spine as he is inches close to you. You try to take a step forward but your body wouldn't move.
Dabi activates his quirk. The warmth of his flames is undeniable but that's not what you're really after. You stare on as the flames dance around you.
"I actually wanted to see you..."
You blink and took a moment to process what you heard. "What?" You turn to him. "He HAS to be lying. This is all a tactic to get what he wants from me." "What do you want from me?" You feel your blood boiling.
"To see your future."
"Future?" You activate Hysteria and push him. "Future?!" You send him flying back.
"Wow... That's a push..." He groans.
"My future?!" You pick him up by the collar. "What do you fucking know?!" You slam him to the wall almost cracking the bridge to a very dangerous state. "Who are you to tell me about my future?! I have NOTHING to begin with! NOTHING!"
"That only means you have everything to gain. Don't you think?"
You pause but shake your head and hiss. You let go of him and fix yourself. "Leave me the fuck alone..."
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