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megan-loves-surveys · 16 days

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#26.

Do you have a large dog? If not, are you afraid of them? No, and it depends on the dog.

Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you didn’t say it back? No.

Who is your favorite photographer? No idea.

Were you shy in high school? Somewhat.

Did the last guy/girl you kissed have any piercings? Yes, my boyfriend has an earring.

Do you actually love your parents? Yes.

Do you know anyone autistic? Not that I know of.

Do you like your girlfriend’s/boyfriend’s parents? Unfortunately, both of them have passed away so I'll never get to meet them.

Do you like Polaroid photography? Not really.

Who was the last family member of yours that died? My Grandma.

Do you have any gay family members? Yes, one of my cousins. I'm also bisexual myself lol.

Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn? No lol, I watch it too xD

What is your favorite type of cat? Any, cats are adorable.

Who of the opposite sex has seen you at your worst? My boyfriend... and my Dad.

Were you raised by someone other than your parents? No.

What’s the last chore you did? Just cleaning up in general.

What is your favorite jungle animal? Dunno.

Is your father injured? No.

Are you part Native American? No.

What are your pets’ names? -

Have you ever worked two jobs? No.

What are the names of all the dogs you’ve ever owned? I've never owned a dog.

Would you ever get a face tattoo? God no.

Who in life have you felt the strongest need to protect? Dunno.

What is the cruelest thing a person has ever said to you? That I looked retarded.

Who have you most feared in your life? Dunno.

What is your strongest reason for your opinion on abortion? I dont want kids, so I always want the option if I accidentally get pregnant.

What one natural thing would you most like to see? Hmm.

Do you like the game Tetris? Sure.

What’s the most rebellious thing you’ve ever done? Oh, don't ask, I'll get in trouble.

Have you ever wanted to be a model? No.

Do you like your name how it’s spelled? Yes, it's the proper way :P I don't like when they add all the extra letters to it, like H and A and that.

Who was your first online friend? Zoe, probably. Not the Zoe I knew in NZ, she was from the UK and was a Blue fan - we met on a Blue fansite haha. We were friends for years! I wonder what she's doing these days.

Your last ex: how did you two get together? We were set up by friends of ours.

Does your mom dye her hair? Yep, her hair is currently like a pinkish red xD I get my love of dying my hair from her.

What’s the best kind of video game? (Adventure, shooting, etc) I love Pokémon, adventure games, strategy games and those 'choices matter' games, plus games like Cyberpunk 2077 & LA Noire that is open world but has a storyline to follow.

Do you know anyone who has road rage? One of my friends lol, he swears constantly when he drives, we get into a small traffic jam and he's like "GET OUT MY WAY CUNT!" out the window lmao.

Have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend? No.

Have you ever tried to break up anyone because YOU liked the guy/girl? I don't do shit like that. I have had a crush on a friend's boyfriend before but I kept it to myself and didn't do anything about it cos I'm not an asshole.

Do you draw fanart of anything? No.

What was the last music video you watched? Did you like it? I watched Ladies Night by Atomic Kitten cos it's one of my faves and I hadn't seen it in ages.

What’s a condition you have that you haven’t been officially diagnosed with? Dunno.

Which one of your parents do you think is smarter? My Dad. My Mum is smart, but I think my Dad outdoes her.

Have you ever supported anyone’s Kickstarter? If so, what was it? Yes, I'm currently backing a Kickstarter for a Broken Sword remake! I can't wait to get my bonuses for it.

What band has the power to make you cry by splitting up? None of them, cos they've all split up and got back together so I'm used to it.

Would you feel funny if you kissed somebody of the same sex? No.

Can grills be sexy on a guy? No.

What’s your favorite comic book/graphic novel? That's not really my thing.

Do you prefer original or sour Skittles? I like both.

Do you find it easy to pass the time or do you get really bored? Depends.

Have you ever been in a Catholic confessional? No.

Who was the last non-relative you rode in a vehicle with? My boyfriend.

What was the title of the last song you listened to? "Bad Kind Of Butterflies" (by Camila Cabello)

Who is the lead singer of your favorite band? They're all the lead singer.

Do you expect to be married in the next 2 years? No.

Have you ever had an allergic reaction to an insect? No.

Who IMed you on Facebook last? My friend.

Is there an item that you bought on a whim, but now consider it a crucial part of your life and you would or have purchased it again? TBH, I decided out of the blue I wanted a FitBit and now I can't live without mine.

What flags do you have in your room, if any? None.

What was the last thing you ate? A banana.

What kind of natural disaster is most common where you live? Tornados.

Do you or your parents rake your yard? We don't have a yard.

If you’re not straight, who was the first person you came out to? Friends online.

What do you think of the ‘Healthy At Every Size’ movement/philosophy? It's stupid.

Where did you meet the last person you swapped numbers with? Work.

Who was the last person to add you as a friend on Facebook? Some random.

Did you enjoy high school? Yes, mostly.

What’s an unusual food combination you like? Hmm, not sure.

What’s the longest stretch of time you’ve spent completely alone? A few days over New Year's once, my Mum went to stay with my Grandma and I stayed at home, I didn't even go out lol.

Did your parents allow you to drink soda when you were a kid? Yes, but only on occasion.

Did you ever go through an emo or goth phase? No.

How many times have you stayed at a hotel in the past year, and where? None.

Do you take a walk every day? I try to.

Who was your favourite musical artist when you were 15? Do you still listen to them? Blue and Girls Aloud, and yep still a huge fan of them!

When was the last time you ate at a food court and what did you get? Last week, I had KFC haha.

How do you like your eggs cooked? Poached or fried.

What’s your favourite place to go on vacation? The USA, but I haven't been since 2019. Thanks Covid.

Have you ever done your own compost? No.

Would you ever get a tattoo on your hand or foot? Nah.

Do you open your doors and windows on warm days? Windows, yes. I feel like I'm suffocating in the warmer weather with them closed.

Are the blinds/curtains in the room open or closed right now? Open.

Were you mean to anyone in high school? No.

Have you ever accidentally started a fire? No, the closest I got was doing popcorn in the microwave and it exploded lol.

What is the last note you edited in your phone’s notes app? My shopping list of things I need to get.

Who is your favourite coworker? You can tell me about one from your past if you don’t have one right now. Hmm, probably Elaine, she's an older woman who is at the next desk to me when I do data entry. She's hilarious, she bakes a lot and always shares with me and doesn't mind swapping shifts with me - this week I wanted Monday off so she switched with me, I took her Friday shift and she took Monday.

Do you know anyone who’s adopted a child? No.

What was the last video game or board game you purchased? I bought a bunch off Steam a bit back.

Are any of your siblings taller than you? -

Name a song that reminds you of a past relationship: Hmm.

Have you ever seen a building on fire in real life? Yes, I remember in our last house, one of the houses down the street caught on fire and completely burnt down.

Have you kissed anyone and their first name started with an F, D, or L? Yes.

Have you ever been in therapy for anything? No.

Is there any part of your sexual/romantic history that you have not told your current significant other about or that you will not tell future partners about? No, my boyfriend knows everything.

Have you ever developed feelings for someone whose sexual orientation was incompatible with yours? Yes. One of my friends is sooooo damn hot, but he swings the other way lol.

How many relationships have you been in that actually got sexual? Most of them.

Who performs the most random acts of kindness out of everyone you know? Lynnette probably.

Who’s the most romantic person you ever went out with? My boyfriend.

Last person to tell you that you smell good? My boyfriend xD

Last person you told that they smell good? See above haha.

Who did you have your first kiss with? Do you remember what colour his/her eyes were? His name was Cameron, and I think they were blue but I'm not sure.

Which edible flowers have you tasted? None.

What was the last video you added to your favorites on YouTube? Not sure.

Do any of your family members have an upcoming birthday? Yep.

Is your favorite animal endangered? No, it's cats xD

What is the middle name of the last person you texted? Daniel.

Have you ever come close to drowning? No.

What’s the cutest thing your S/O does, but denies it’s cute in any way? He pouts, and then denies he pouts LOL.

Have you ever dined alone at a restaurant? Not a proper restaurant but at like cafes and stuff, yeah.

Have you ever changed in front of the last person you kissed? Yes.

Have you experienced any severe side effects of medications? Yes - I took antibiotics a few years ago and they gave me a super bad rash and diarrhoea. Found out I'm allergic to that kind!

Have you ever had a big YouTuber reply to a comment you left on their video? Yep.

Have you ever given a lap dance? Yes, as a joke xD

Do a lot of people tell you that you are funny? Not a lot, but on occasion people have said I am haha.

Have you gone to a tanning bed lately? No.

What did you do on the Fourth of July? I'm not American.

Do you have nice legs? I like to think so. I have a short torso so I'm mostly leg haha.

Have you ever been to Ohio? No.

Do you like The Goonies? Never seen it.

Do you prefer hardly toasted at all or burnt toast? Not burnt, but very toasted.

Do you have any unusual skills? Depends what you consider 'unusual'.

Do you have any bug bites right now? No.

Is there anything annoying you at the moment? Yes. I had caffeine in my Starbucks and now it's making me weird lol, I keep forgetting to ask them not to add any.

Are there any forms of art you personally find pointless? Nah, some of it isn't my thing but it means a lot to other people.

Do you have any projects on the go right now? No.

Are you a hat person? On occasion.

Has anyone ever approached you in the street and asked to take your picture? No haha.

What song’s stuck in your head? Cody Rhodes' entrance theme cos he was on SD earlier and it was playing for awhile haha.

Do your feelings get hurt easily? Not really.

Have you ever seen a cougar in the wild? No.

When was the last time you took a selfie? The other day.

Do you have any nieces or nephews? No.

Do you have a good relationship with your cousins? i don't see them much, but we did get along.

Are there any upcoming events for you to look forward to? Sure.

How many siblings does your significant other have? He has two brothers.

Have you ever done three or more shots in a row? Not in a row xD

What was the last zoo you visited? I think the one in Washington DC.

#survey #surveys #random survey #personal survey

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redrobin-detective · 3 years

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all is well

Death is nothing at all, I have only slipped into the next room I am I and you are you Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. ~ Henry Scott Hollard

AO3 link

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He hadn’t meant to say it, that much was clear. As much as she wanted to hate him for it, claim it was some sort of cruel manipulation; she knew he was just as distressed as she was. The ghost boy had covered his mouth, bright green eyes wide with panic as his misspoken words brought their battle to a screeching halt. Even the ghost the three hunters had been fighting stopped and stared before flying off. No one moved to stop them. Phantom looked at her fearfully, then over at her companion before vanishing without a trace.

It was a slip of the tongue, an accident, so why did the ghost boy calling her Mom make her blood run so cold?

“I’ve knew a kid who called the teacher Mom one time but I’ve never heard it from a ghost,” the Red Huntress said with a sarcastic chuckle. But her shoulders were tense and it was clear the situation made her uncomfortable too. “You okay, Mrs. Fenton?”

“My son isn’t dead,” Maddie said quietly. She would admit there were times where she’d look at Phantom and see Danny overlaid on top of him but those moments were becoming more and more rare. Maddie liked to think it’s because she could find more differences than similarities between the two but honestly, she couldn’t say who her son was anymore. She saw this damned ghost more than she saw the child living in her own house.

“I know, I’ve seen him around,” Huntress said with steady conviction. It made Maddie pause, as it always did, to wonder just how old Amity’s other human ghost hunter really was. Or how young rather. “It was a mistake, he’ll probably avoid you for a bit out of embarrassment but then things will go back to normal.”

“Yeah, a mistake,” Maddie muttered to herself, finally lowering the gun even though the fighting had ended several minutes ago. Why was this whole thing so unsettling to her? Phantom had said much worse things to her, called her a fake scientist and more obsessive than a ghost. He’d even called her a bad mother once when he’d been particularly riled up. She remembered how offended and angry his unnatural eyes had been as they’d glared accusingly into her.

“You know his parents are still alive,” Huntress said suddenly. “I found out by accident a little while ago.” She was still standing on her hoverboard about 3 feet off the ground, her gaze was trained away from Maddie. “They don’t know that he’s a ghost, that he’s Phantom,” the girl’s head was still turned away from Maddie but she had a feeling she was being watched none the less. “Maybe you remind him of his mother.”

Maddie felt liked she’d been slapped.

“And why does that matter to you?” she questioned defensively to cover how much the conversation was shaking her - they didn’t know how could they not know, how could they not miss - “I thought you hated him as much as we did.”

“I don’t like him,” the Huntress said vehemently. “He’s annoying and acts like he’s the only hunter in this town who can actually do the job. But I,” she paused, “I think I understand him, just a little bit. Enough that I’ve been combing through Amity’s missing children files in my spare time. Of course, it’s no good if no one reported him missing in the first place. Phantom doesn’t want me prying but it’s not right for a kid to die and no one to care.”

“He’s just a ghost,” Maddie said, her words weak even to her ears. Was that why Phantom was stuck here? Because he died forgotten and unmourned? The thought of one of her children, her babies, dying without her knowing... she was going to be sick.

“Yeah, he is,” Huntress nodded, “but he wasn’t always. And humans deserve to be remembered, even if they don’t want to be.” That said, the girl sped off into the setting sun, the varying shades of orange glinting off of her suit. Maddie stood in the middle of the street for a little while longer, gun pointed limply at the ground as her whole world spun.

She drove home slowly, taking the long way around to try and put her conflicting feelings into words before she talked to her husband. When she and Jack first began their research into ghosts, they told themselves that they had to divorce themselves from the people the ghosts had been before. If you focused on the lingering traces of humanity in every monster then they would never be put in their place. But she was human and she had kids around the ghost boy’s age, despite her attempts to stick to logic her heart ached with sympathy.

“And you call yourself a mother,” the Phantom in her memory spat at her, filled with hatred but underneath it all was grief. “Where are your kids now? All you care about is the dead but when are you going to care for the living?” Maddie tightened her grip on the steering wheel to keep her hands from shaking.

“Mads! You’re home!” Jack grinned enthusiastically as she quietly entered the house. “Jazzy has her nose in her books and you know Danny, in and up to his room without a word so I made us grilled cheese!” He held her a plate with a flourish, “they’re ghost shaped!” The world tilted itself a little more onto it’s proper axis, no matter how crazy things got, Jack would always be her true north.

“Gracias,” she said accepting the plate. “Can we talk, privately?” She gestured her head down to the basement. Conversations from the kitchen could easily be heard upstairs and she really didn’t want her children to overhear her asking if she was a bad mom. She didn’t want their confirmation that she was right.

Jack’s goofy grinned smoothed out into something softer and he put one hand gently on her back as they walked down to basement. He kicked her usual stool her way and they sat in silence while they ate their dinners, staring at the swirling vortex of the portal.

“You remember that time Phantom called me a neglectful mother?” Maddie asked quietly after a few minutes.

“Mads, you can’t let that sneaky spook get to you. Everyone knows you’re a great-”

“Jack,” she interrupted harsher than she needed to but she didn’t need comfort from a husband but the unbiased opinion of a fellow scientist. “He accidentally called me Mom while we were fighting today, I don’t - I don’t think he meant it, he looked more scared then I’ve ever seen him before he ran off. Huntress was there too, she said.” Maddie gripped her plate tightly in her hands. “She said that Phantom’s family is still alive, that they don’t know about him.”

“Not know? You mean about him being-”

“Apparently,” Maddie squeezed her eyes shut to fight off the unwanted sympathy she felt. “He’s always been the Ghost Boy, the Ghost Kid. I never - I never fully absorbed what that meant. He looks,” Maddie set the plate aside and dropped her head into her hands. “He’s about Danny’s age.”

“Maddie,” Jack said softly, setting aside his own plate and wheeling himself closer. “Whoever that boy was, he’s gone now and all that’s left is an echo, an obnoxious and powerful echo but he’s not... he’s not a child. Not anymore.”

“But he remembers,” Maddie gasped, angry she was letting herself get all worked up over a stupid ghost. “He called me Mom, Jack. Huntress, she said maybe I reminded him of her and,” her eyes filled with tears now. “He’s comparing me to someone who didn’t even notice that he’d died. What does that say about me? About my relationship with our children? I feel like all I do is argue with Jazz these days and god knows where Danny goes to half the time-”

“Maddie, don’t do that to yourself,” Jack said softly, tilting her face up towards him with a gloved hand. “Once you go down that rabbit hole, there’s no digging yourself out. I think it’s just part of being a parent, always worrying that you’re not doing things right. Sometimes,” Jack gaze dropped, troubled. “Sometimes I enter the room and Danny looks at me and freezes like he expects me to do something terrible... He’s just easily startled but it still hurts.”

“Phantom is an echo, not a child,” Maddie nodded quietly to herself, trying to fall back on her usual logic but it tasted wrong in her mouth. He was a ghost... but also a child. “I wonder what he was like when he was alive? His personality seems remarkably preserved, he must have been a vibrant young man.”

“Or his death was particularly traumatic,” Jack mumbled. “Painful deaths usually leave powerful ghosts. And most healthy teens don’t just drop dead for nothing.” A chill fell over the lab.

“How could they not notice?” Maddie whispered with horror. “What sort of parent wouldn’t see that their child was dead, what? Now two years in?”

“Not everyone is as good a mom as you are, Mads,” Jack said, pulling her into his chest. “Neglectful parents are a dime a dozen sadly. He could’ve been a runaway too, ran off and died leaving his folks still holding out hope that he’d come home. Or maybe...” he frowned, “maybe he’s pretending he’s still alive.”

“No, he couldn’t keep the charade for this long,” Maddie gasped but the horrible idea had been planted none the less. Phantom always seemed in such a hurry, like he had somewhere else to be. Was another woman tapping her feet as she waited for her boy to return like Maddie often did, not knowing her child was long gone?

“He’s a wily one, incredibly solid for a spirit. Sometimes I look at him and swear I see his chest moving like he’s breathing. Dampen his glow, dye the hair, change his clothes, he could probably pass as human so long as you didn’t look too close.”

“Jack,” she pulled back and looked at her husband in a panic. “Jack, if he’s pretending to be human when he’s not fighting then there’s a good chance he goes to Casper.” Her and Jack’s eyes widened with realization at the same time.

Their children’s high school has had an unprecedented amount of ghost attacks since the portal opened. They could never figure out why the ghosts targeted that school and ignored the other elementary, middle or even the other public high, Wendy. “What are we going to do, should we pull out Danny and Jazz? Even just until we figure this out.”

“That might tip the ghost off,” Jack said evenly but his teeth were biting into his cheek with worry. “We don’t want to set him off, who knows what he’d do if his cover was blown.” He might look like a harmless teen but Maddie had seen first hand how devastating Phantom could be when threatened. “I think we should tell the kids.”

“What? Why? You know they’re supportive of him!” Well Jazz certainly was, differing opinion on Phantom seemed to be the cause of half their arguments. Danny, truthfully, she didn’t really know his opinions on the ghost boy. He always looked so uncomfortable talking about ghosts with them so they just didn’t.

“Supportive maybe but they’re smart and observant,” Jack countered. “They could be our eyes and ears inside the school. They know better than to provoke a dangerous ghost,” Jack let his eyes drift over to the portal. “Besides, if the worst comes to pass, I want them to be prepared.”

“I don’t like it but you’re probably right,” Maddie grumbled. “If it keeps them safe then I’d do just about anything.” Jack smiled and leaned forward to kiss her gently, his lips a perfect match for her own.

“And this is why you could never be a bad mother,” he said. “Come on, let’s talk to them before they go to sleep.”

“Or Danny sneaks out again,” Maddie said to herself as she followed her husband up the stairs and heard him call for a Fenton family meeting.

It went about as well as Maddie had expected. Jazz alternated between being angry and anxious, telling them emphatically that Phantom wasn’t hiding among them at school and wasn’t a bad ghost to begin with. Maddie didn’t know what had come over her but she hardly recognized this irrational and emotional young lady as her daughter. She hoped it was just Senior year stress and hormones and not some ghostly influenced. Danny, as usual, sat there like he was a piece of the furniture and didn’t say much at all.

“Danno,” Jack said gently as he interrupted Jazz’s rant to engage their youngest. “You would tell us if you noticed anything unusual with one of your classmates, right? You know we’re telling you kids this because we trust you, love you and want to keep you safe.”

“Have you considered that keeping guns around the house, threatening to hunt and torture ghosts doesn’t make me feel very safe?” Danny said quietly, looking down at the table. “So what if he sometimes goes to school, maybe he wants to have something normal in his life. All I know is that if I was Phantom, maybe I would want to hide too. So people like you didn’t find me.” For the second time that night, the words of a teenage boy stopped her cold.

“Danny, what do you-” Danny didn’t elaborate and instead pushed his chair back and headed towards the door.

“Young Man, where are you going? It’s almost curfew and we’re not done here,” Maddie scolded even though she knew that neither her or Jack were in the control of the situation. Danny opened the door and didn’t look back.

“I won’t be long, just a lap around the block. I just, I just need some air, okay?” The house became quiet, no one quite knowing what to say. Jazz excused herself a moment later and walked back up to her room. She slammed her door shut. The ticking of the clock was the only sound to be heard in the suddenly silent kitchen.

“Is that how he sees us?” Jack asked quietly, looking down at his large hands. “Danny used to think what we did was so cool, when did that change?” When did he change? was the silent, unasked question. Or maybe they'd all changed, grown apart so slowly that no one had really noticed. Maddie stood up abruptly and stalked towards the door, strapping an ectogun to her hip as she went.

“Mads, maybe you should give him-”

“You know as well as I do that this is the peak time for ghosts. Danny, he might not trust us but I won’t let a disagreement get him killed.” It was full dark outside and she was halfway down the block before she realized she didn’t know which direction Danny had gone in. The night air was chill for mid-April as it shook off the last dregs of winter. She was feeling cold in her protective hazmat; Danny had left in short sleeves. Maybe she should run back and get his jacket for when she found him.

“Nice night for a walk,” Maddie jumped at the voice to find Phantom lazily floating in the air above her. His posture was casual but his eyes were sharp, searching as he always was. Green eyes glanced at her gun before meeting her eyes. “Looking for someone? Perhaps chasing someone who doesn’t want to found?” No way was she going to let him know her son was out here, alone and vulnerable.

“You actually,” she lied. He raised a disbelieving eyebrow but didn’t call her out. How could he be so expressive and so hard to read all at once? Against her better judgement, she thought again about the ghost as a human. “You called me Mom earlier, I want to know why.”

“What, you’ve never called someone something dumb by mistake?” Phantom flinched, crossing his arms defensively. “It was an accident, I’m just as upset as you are, believe me. Now if you don’t mind, I was trying to have a nice flight to clear my mind. Good luck finding whoever you were really looking for.”

“My husband thinks you’re pretending to be alive, that you’re lying to the town, going to school.” She searched his face for some sign that she was wrong but his expression was still as stone. “You’re putting people in jeopardy, I thought you wanted to play the hero!”

“I’m not doing anything,” He growled, his eyes flashing ominously in the dark. “I’m just doing the best I can, okay? If I go to the Nasty Burger or sit in on English Poetry when there’s no ghosts to fight then who’s hurt? Only me for trying to hang onto something real, something normal!”

“But the ghosts-”

“News flash! The ghosts would be here with or without me because of your stupid portal! I can’t even legally drive and yet you blame me for everything.” He scoffed and looked away, “you really are just like my mother.”

“So I do remind you of her,” she stated. “Your mother.”

“That’s a great thing to say to some kid you shoot at regularly,” Phantom said, icily, his green gaze boring into her over his shoulder. “What do you want me to say? Yeah, you do. It’s not just your voice or your face but the way you look at me like I’m nothing but a disappointment. How you make me feel like I’m some damaged child you need to hammer into shape.”

“You can’t - I’m not disappointed,” she said before she could think otherwise because how else could she react to such a charged statement? What kind of abusive, miserable home had he come from? Her heart clenched again to be compared to this woman.

“Yeah, I can tell,” Phantom snapped at her sarcastically but, like the time when he’d called her a bad mother, underneath the anger was sadness. “None of this matters, we’re both going to keep doing our own thing without each other’s approval. We’re enemies so let’s just forget this all happened and go back to you shooting at me while I beg for you just stop and listen for one second-”

“Alright, I’m listening!” Maddie shouted back, frustrated and sympathetic against her better judgement. “What is it you want to tell me so bad?” Phantom froze, like he hadn’t expected her to just stop like that. His shoulders hunched and his eyes were wide and he looked so much like a lost teenager that it pulled painfully at her heart. God, why did this one ghost bring out so many contradictory feelings in her?

“I want,” he stopped, swallowed and floated to the ground so they were near eye level. Sometime in the last year, he’d gotten taller than her. She hadn’t realized ghosts could grow, could age. Phantom was always the exception to every rule they had. “I want the same thing you want. I don’t like seeing ghosts coming through and hurting people. Before I was Phantom, I was nobody, I couldn’t help anyone. I can now and keeping people safe, it gives me a purpose I didn’t even have when I was human. Ghosts might just be the untethered remnants of dead people but we still love and feel and value things, just differently than you do. I want to keep ghosts from attacking people but without damaging them, we’re not all evil just... trying to find our own way to the finish line. If you’d just, not attack on sight, I could show you.”

It was perhaps the most she’d heard Phantom say all at once. He was rubbing his gloved fingers anxiously against his thigh and there was a desperate bit of want in his tragically young face. He wanted her to believe him, like a child looking to their mother for approval. As more time stretched on without her speaking, his hopeful look fell into a kind of sad acceptance. He looked like Danny had at the kitchen table not 15 minutes before.

“Okay,” she said finally. “We can give it a try for a bit. It’s not a truce exactly but so long as you’re not causing harm, Jack and I won’t shoot at you.” It wasn’t much but the boy looked like he’d handed her the moon and then some. He floated up a little, his boots jittered with excitement. She gaped when he reached forward and grasped her hand only to shake it enthusiastically. His hand was chilled but solid in her own.

“Yeah, you got a deal! Don’t worry, Mo- Ma’am you won’t have to worry about me, I’ll be a good little ghost, scouts honor! not that I was, uh, ever in the scouts. If things go well, I’d be happy to tell you more about ghosts and the Zone. I’ll even give you a tour if you’d like.” His smile was infectious and she bit her lip to resist the natural urge to smile back.

Maybe Phantom was a ghost, a sad child who’d died far too young but he was also someone’s son. That woman, however, hadn’t been able to protect him, to support him. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to give the ghost boy a chance and maybe Maddie could fill in something his other mother couldn’t. Perhaps she could even learn how to give her own children what they needed too.

“We’ll see,” Maddie hummed. “Now, you were going to go flying and I need to find my son before he catches his death, that is, if he’ll even talk to me.”

“He will,” Phantom said softly. “My mom messed up, hurt me sometimes but I knew she loved me and I love her. I don’t know your son but I do know what it’s like to be a son and your mom is... whether you’re living, dead or in-between, she’s always your mom. Maybe he’s worried you won’t love him, the things he’s done or believes in.” He looked away and rubbed the back of his neck, “Of course, I don’t really know you and your family. Usually try and avoid you guys, being ghost hunters and all. Even your daughter is pretty scary.”

“That would be pretty weird, a ghost surrounded by hunters,” her lips twitched upwards despite herself as she imagined Phantom chatting with Jack and Jazz in the living room. The image wasn’t quite as strange as she’d initially thought. Who knows where this shaky truce would lead them? Phantom took that as his excuse to leave and flew off into the night. Maddie watched him go, she started up the block when she got a series of texts a few minutes later.

Danny: I’m home, sorry for running off like that Danny: I don’t like the way you talk about ghosts the way some people talk about race or gender. I want to make opinions based on facts and understanding, not half baked theories Danny: I’d be willing to talk more, if you’d stop being so stubbornly certain you’re right and just listened for a change Danny: I love you, Mom I don’t think I say that enough. Sometimes I feel scared to, like you won’t understand Danny: Jazz came down and Dad brought out the special fudge Danny: Come home, its cold out

Maddie brought her phone to her lips, looking up in the sky as if she might see Phantom still flying around. That boy still loved his mother, the mother who’d hurt him. She didn’t want to be like Phantom’s mom: distant, cruel, unwilling to listen. If she could hold out an olive branch for her enemy, then she certainly could for her son.

Mom: I love you too, baby, never doubt that. I think I'm ready to listen now. Mom: I’m on my way home, save some fudge for me.

I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, Just around the corner. All is well.

#danny phantom #my writing #this seriously came out of nowhere #it took several twists as it just kind of unfurled underneath me #was halfheartedly searching poems about death when I foung this one #it just jumped out like lightning to me #that even though death and circumstance have seperate Maddie and Danny #they're still connected #still mother and son for good or ill #there's love there and a chance for renewal #idk Im just tired #this has been written for like 3 hours its just taken me this damn long to edit

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sif-the-tsunami · 3 years

Text

When I Was His Wife

“Well I was looking forward to/ staying here forever/ ‘cause you asked me to/ Didn’t think I could do better/ So I settled down/ in this ten cent town/ it’s about to break me.” These are the Best Years of my Life- Pistol Annies

This is the follow up to “When You Fall Apart” Which is one of my favorites that I’ve written.

(there is Sy just carrying the weight of all of my own internal chaos)

A/N thank you for everyone who encouraged me to write this, I adore Sy as a character. He seemed like someone who could pull off the impossible. I made some choices in here that not everyone will agree with. Tell me I’m wrong in the comments an we can discuss it there.

Pairing: Sy and Josephine

Warnings: again all of them. discussion of infidelity, Discussion of child loss, discussion of unprotected sexual intercourse, headbutting, day drinking, self medicating, therapy, swearing fealty on ones hunting knife, discussion of knife play, I’m probably missing something

Everything is going below the cut this time to save anyone who doesn’t like this kind of stuff from unpleasantness.

word count just shy of 7.5K

Thank you to @inlovewithhisblueeyes for letting me bounce ideas off of you, love you sweet girl

tagging: @oddsnendsfanfics @willkatfanfromasia @rocket44 @feralrunaway @littlewrenofrivia @summersong69 @coffeebooksandfandom @klaine-92 @nothingright @cavillsim @watery-lane @above-average-ass-bitch

unbeta’d

I slept for the next two days, Mama only woke me up long enough to drink some water once she started worrying about me. She managed to wrangle my out of my clothes and into one of Daddy’s shirts we got him that she left in the drawer. My phone was dead, but thankfully Mama and I had the same kind so I could charge it today. What fresh hell was going to be waiting for me on my digital leash? I lay there for a while, the murmur of conversation in the other room was comforting. Mama left a fresh glass of water some time recently, it was still chilly with only a little condensation forming around the sides. The ache in my chest was almost unbearable. The hole in my heart was Syverson sized, being sober made the edges of that abyss feel even more raw and pronounced. I don’t know if my liver could handle me drowning my sorrow much more, but I would give anything to not feel it. I need to make this feeling of worthlessness go away.

When I finally decided to rejoin the land of the living, Mama and my brother Teddy were talking at the kitchen table, discussing about if they should come with me to go get my things or if I should call the sheriff’s office to be monitored. I stayed behind the corner long enough to let them finish what they were going on about.

“If I know Jo well enough, she’s going to need someone to keep her from burning the whole house down with him in it tied to a chair,” my brother chuckled. “She’s been taking care of herself for years. You should have seen how she handled one of these girls who came up to us once on Post.

“Jo was loading up the car when this prissy little thing came walking up, she must have thought she was some kind of hot shit. You would have been so proud of her Mama, the girl said to her that she had been sleeping with James during their deployment. All Jo said back to her was ‘You’ve both been back for something like three months, right, have you seen him since?’ Little Miss Hot Shit stuttered and said ‘Well not yet,’ like she had been really holding out that he was going to. ‘He doesn’t have my new phone number.’ Jo just tiled her head to the side. Smiled at her real sweetly and told her, ‘Baby girl, he’s not going to. He knows how to find you. You were just a rental car to him, sweetie bell. Ford Fiestas are fun as hell to ride but let’s be honest, you aren’t going to pick a Fiesta over the Mercedes Benz you have at home. You aren’t the first and you sure as hell won’t be the last, now go on and get out of here before I ruin the rest of your day like you tried to ruin mine.’ One of the other officer’s wives came up to her and said she was amazed that she handled her so well without breaking Miss Prissy Pant’s face. She just said ‘I’m too pretty to go to prison, Kathy.’ And we hoped in the car. You raised one tough lady, Mama.”

“How many times has that happened, Theodore, I need to know.”

“She has only told me about four women meeting her face to face. The two pregnant girls who got knocked up to get out of their deployments, Prissy Pants, and one who thought that James was in love with her. She evidently broke down in tears on the tarmac when Josie jumped into his arms and he swung her around. But she would get letters tucked into the windshield of her car for months whenever he returned from deployment.”

“You two kept this from me for years, why?”

“Jo said that this was her problem, don’t you remember how you handled it when her first boyfriend ran out on her on prom night? She cried to you and Dad, and you just told her that no one is worth weeping over. She’s just been trying to make you proud, Mama. Daddy might have known because I know they had a really nasty fight about a month before he died.”

I walked out after that. Mama’s eyes were red, “Good morning, baby, do you want pancakes? Bacon and eggs? What do you want, Darlin’?”

“Coffee would be a good start.” I rasped. “Can I use your charger?”

“It’s right here. Cream and sugar?”

“Black as my sense of humor, please Mama.” I said, Teddy chuckled again. I reached over and squeezed my brother’s shoulder. “Hey, I’m glad you’re here.”

“I got to look after my little sissy.” He replied using what he called me growing up. “So what are we doing to get over Jimmy?”

“I was thinking tattoos and day drinking?”

“Atta’ girl, Josie. Fuck that douche canoe.”

As soon as my phone was able to turn on, it sat on the counter vibrating for the next five minutes. Six missed calls from James. And seventy text messages. A few from stores I shop at, but the majority were from my husband.

“Ugh, I just don’t feel like dealing with this right now.” I said as my mom put my coffee in front of me.

“Just leave him on read. I doubt he’s hurting for company.” Mama said, in almost a snarl. I looked through a few messages. The last one was from this morning. Sweetheart, I’m worried sick about you, I miss you. Please talk to me?

“Ted, do you want to go with me to Walmart so I can get a couple day’s worth of clothes, I am just not ready to go back and I can’t live in Daddy’s old shirts.”

“Of course, we can get some booze while we are there.”

“Get yourself a bathing suit while you are there, honey, its going to be beautiful today and you can go for a swim.” Mama added.

I texted James back finally as I finished my coffee. I’m sorry I worried you, Sy, I have literally been asleep since I got here. I’m not ready.

I understand. I’m sorry, I should have seen how much I’ve been hurting you. I swear to God, I really do love you. Please, let me know what I can do for you.

Yeah, you should have, James. You should have seen how bad you’ve been treating me. You can drop off the face of the earth, that’s what you can do for me, I think spitefully. Thankfully, Mama washed my yoga pants and tank top. It would have to be alright for now. My brother let me wear one of his extra flannel shirts he kept in the back of his car. An hour later, Ted and I were at the store, picking up chips, dip, and cheap champagne. Mama loved mimosas, so I thought it was the least I could do. I grabbed a couple of sun dresses and a bikini, if I was going to be gone for a few days, I was going to come back home looking refreshed, radiant even, and not like the hot pile of garbage I was feeling like. I made a small detour to the cosmetics department, got myself a couple of face masks, hair dye, and sun screen.

“Really? Dark brown, Josie?”

“That’s as close to my natural color as I can, I’m tired of the blonde highlights. I think after this I might just let it come in. Grays and all. Who ever loves me next is going to have to just deal with me as nature intended.”

“I’m proud of you. Do you think you will leave him for good?” He said, Ted has always been very protective of me.

“Well, I certainly can’t leave him for evil, can I?” Making him laugh. One the way outside there was a truck near the front of the store with a sign that read “Puppies for sale.”

“Teddy, we need to see these puppies.” I gasped. Walking up to the truck bed I saw the sweetest little German Shepard puppies. I reached in and they all started flopping all over the place trying to get pets and love. Maybe a puppy was exactly what my hurting heart needed. We haven’t had a dog since Aika passed away. It was looking like I would never have a baby but maybe this was the kind I needed. Puppy snuggles would definitely make that Syverson shaped hole less painful.

“I’ll buy you a puppy if you divorce James.” Ted said to me, half joking.

“Shit, I can afford the puppy, pay for the divorce.” I jest back. “How much for one of the precious babies?”

“$500 a pup, mom has a pedigree, but daddy was the neighbor’s sneaky bastard.” The woman also petting the puppies said. “Mama is in the front if you want to meet her, daddy is very friendly as well.”

I start laughing uncontrollably. With tears in my eyes, I ask if any of the puppies are girls, and she pulls out a beautiful little one with floppy ears and the biggest smile I had ever seen on a dog. Oh yeah, she was meant for me.

“I’ll take her, do you take checks?” I think I’m ready to start healing.

*****

“Josephine, that son of a bitch you call your husband is here to see you.” Mama shouts from the house. It’s Sunday afternoon now, Teddy and I have exhausted all the snacks and mimosas hours ago and now we were sobering up by the pool. My new baby girl is laying next to my sun chair, chewing on her bone, wearing a pretty pink collar.

“Well, might as well let him out here.” I shout back.

“Are you sure, I can kick his ass to the curb if you want me to, baby.”

“Its okay Mama, I can handle him myself.” Sy walks out in the back yard a couple minutes later. I’m guessing Mama threatened to stick him in a meat grinder.

“I deserved that.” He said, looking thoroughly admonished. “You changed your hair, it looks really good...

“Oh bless your heart, James. That’s not even half of what you deserve.” Ted spoke up before he could finish, not moving his face towards him. He lay there in his swim trunks and dark sunglasses.

“Oh great, all three of you have been drinking. I can tell this is going to go well...” James sighed. “Who is this cutie pie, did your Ma get a new dog?”

“She’s my dog, her name is Stella Rosa.”

“I don’t think anyone asked you to come, Colonel Sanders, what are you doing here?” Ted snapped.

“Hey, I got this, okay? I’m a big girl, please, go in the house. The fuck are you doing here James?” I lift my sun glasses up.

“She’s a very sweet pup. Yeah, you are a good girl for your mama, aren’t you? I came to see you. I want to bring you home, baby, I miss you.” He’s checking out my fresh tan in my new bikini. Subtly, but he does it.

“I’m not ready. I’m not even ready to talk to you. Why would you think that I even want to come home?”

“I don’t know, I asked myself that the entire drive here. I don’t know what I’m even going to do with myself when I go home alone. Pussycat, I can’t begin to think of life without you. I know I fucked up. And I know I can’t take that back. You asked me the other day what I kept that was special just between us. I should have answered you then. All those nights where you fell asleep with your head on my chest, the evenings laying in the back of the truck looking at the stars after driving around trying to find the best nachos in town. And, baby, no matter where we go, yours are always the best. No one else ever got moments like that. You are the only woman I want to slow dance with in the middle of the night.

“You are the only person in the world that I would wait four hours in the freezing cold to get the best brisket in Austin for because you were craving bbq when we were still, you know...” He paused. I don’t think he ever stopped blaming himself for what happened. His knees were never the same after that accident, and usually whenever he stood up from kneeling, they clicked and popped painfully. He leaned a little closer spreading his legs and reached down to pet Stella. She seemed a little leery of him. It is easy to be cynical given the circumstances, but there is something about the way he is talking to me, I haven’t heard him be this earnest in years.

“When was the last time you were with someone other than me?” I can’t bring myself to look at him. I keep my eyes anywhere but on him. My body aches so badly for him to just wrap his arms around me. I miss him.

“When I got held up in Kuwait for two weeks in December...”

“December? You mean when you missed my fucking birthday. Goddammit James...” And the ache is gone. My heart shattered again. He’s going to make me cry again.

“Hey, it was after your birthday, and it was a hate fuck because I was mad that I broke yet another promise to you.”

“That doesn’t make it better.” I snap. “How many that deployment?”

“Just the one. And she’s someone who I knew was more discreet because we had that arrangement before.”

“I swear on my Daddy’s grave that if you are lying to me right now, I will end you Syverson. You couldn’t have waited a few more days?”

“I had no idea when I was going home. We boarded that fucking plane three times and had to turn back because there was a problem with it. I was two seconds away from tearing apart the first Private that so much as looked at me sideways. It felt like, at the time, the less terrible choice.”

“They sound both pretty shitty to me. You are a fucking adult James, you have to be able to control yourself or at least be responsible for your actions. If this is what you think love is, I would rather you hate me.” I stand up. Stella wags her tail excited to get away.

“Josephine, please...” He grasps my wrist, not hard, but there wasn’t anyway I was going to be able to get out of his big hand.

“Please what? Please stay so you can keep treating me like this. There are some people in this world who have no problem playing second or third fiddle, they are just thankful they are in the band. But I deserve to be your first chair, or I don’t want to play at all.”

“Mama wants to know if the jackass is staying for dinner.” Ted shouts at us.

“He going!” “I’m staying!” we yell over each other. He’s not looking at me, he’s not even looking at the pup. His eyes are somewhere else, mentally for a second he is somewhere else also.

“Baby… I… You have always been my first chair. There is no one else on earth like you. I have never done anything with these women as an act of love. It was always been, and I mean always, just a way to scratch an itch. Every time I was gone, every time things got bad, getting to come home to you was the thing that keep me going, Jo. You have been my safe harbor for the worst parts of my life.”

“James… That doesn’t excuse what you’ve done. You aren’t the man I fell for anymore. This isn’t healthy.” He let go of my wrist, and rubs his face. Those beautiful eyes of his have seen so much. For the first time I think he actually looks… broken. Is this the remorse I have been wanting to see? I try not to keep scores, especially when it comes to my loved ones. But for the first time since things went sour, he looks like I hurt him as much as he has hurt me.

Maybe there was love between us once. However there are just two broken hearts for now.

“Come on in the house, I can at least feed you before I send you back.”

“I think I will just go,” he says it quietly. “I don’t want to be a burden on you.”

“Don’t be like that, I am still cooking like I’m making dinner for you, so its way too much for the three of us. Come on in, I made carnitas.”

“I’ll be in, I just need a minute.” He refuses to let me see him cry if he’s not waking up screaming, even after all this time. Whenever we could have a healing moment, he pushes me out. I went inside, and started setting the table.

“Are we poisoning his tacos?” Teddy asked me.

“That’s not the worst idea I’ve heard today.” Mama interjected.

“No, and don’t start anything. He’s eating dinner with us, don’t either of you make him feel bad. I already did that.” Sy walked in at that moment, those blue eyes of his rimmed with red. He looked defeated. The four of us ate our dinner in silence. There was a time where he would have made some kind of comment about eating me out when we had tacos. He looked at me once during the meal, I think he remembered it too. He offered to clear the plates when were all done and sat in uncomfortable silence. The cockiness I had grown accustomed to over the years was gone.

He carried himself like this when we lost our baby, he can’t take that kind of humility. At least not with me.

“Sy...” I waited until the others were out of the room. “Do you still want me to come home with you?”

“Not if it means all we are going to do is get a divorce. I can’t see you every day knowing that I will never get to be yours again. I let them do a lot of terrible things to me over the years, but that… that I can’t handle.” His voice cracked. “If you want out, I will give you everything you ask for. I won’t fight you. But please, give me a chance to fight for you.”

“I don’t think you are exactly in a position to make that that request.” I lean against the counter across the room from him.

“No, I’m not.” he half smirked, “I don’t deserve you.”

“Look, I’m not saying that this can’t still all explode in our faces. But I miss my best friend and that has always been the best part of us. It will never be the same as it was before, it can’t be. However, if you are willing to work with me, I am willing to see if we there is any salvageable. If nothing else, we both need therapy very badly. We can’t just shrug this off. The second that it goes back to where we were, I’m gone.”

“Okay. I’ll do it.” He sniffs hard, and his breath is broken up, tucking his arms against himself. Usually its in authority, this time hes just trying to hug himself. I gesture him to come over and I hug him. He wraps his arms around then envelopes me. Leaning his head on mine, he whispers “I’ll do whatever you want, my darlin.”

I told my mom that I would be going home, she sighed at me. “Do you think this is the best idea?”

“I don’t know, Mama. I think I just want some closure. I told him if he so much as sneezes out of line that I’m gone. Forever. There will be no more chances.”

“Well, baby, I trust you. You are always welcome back here if you need to get away.”

While I’m packing my stuff into the shopping bags I had, I hear a sudden crack and Sy groans then swears. “yeah, I deserved that too.”

“What the fuck did you just do, Theodore?” I yell coming out. Ted was still holding my husband’s hand, and Sy was holding his face. “Did you… just headbutt him?”

“Yes, I did. My sister my might be willing to move past your mistakes, but I’m not. However, I’ve always been the petty one in the family. Hurt her again, they will have to dig your nuts out of your chest cavity, do we understand each other?”

“Yep, perfectly.” Sy grimaced. There were very few men that he would not retaliate against. Teddy, at 6’5, and years of horse wrangling, was one of them. Sy was build like a brick shit house, but so was my big brother. I thought we were old enough to not resort to violence, I have been wrong before.

My probably, potentially, soon to be ex-husband put mine and Stella’s things in the back bench of his truck. I held her in the crook of my arm as I climbed up in the cab. He gently shut the door for me, I noticed his shiner was going to be pretty gnarly in the morning.

He climbed into the other side as I set little Stella down on the floor. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, it was a cheap shot, I’ll be fine. At this point, I don’t want to rock the boat with your brother and Ma. She tore me a new asshole before I got outside today.”

“I’m surprised you haven’t changed your mind, say to hell with me and that I’m not worth the hassle.”

“Josephine, I might not have made the appropriate effort to show you how much you mean to me, but you are worth it.” The Syverson shaped hole in my heart roared. Why couldn’t he have been this way all along?

We talked about the girl at the movies, and how she was one of his new officers. She might have come on to him, but he never engaged with her outside of work related things. He told her several times that he wasn’t interested but she was persistent. I halfway apologized for trying to decapitate him with a tequila bottle. He acknowledged that this was a long time coming. This was the most we had talked about anything deep for months. I don’t know if it was too little and too late though.

The rest of the drive home we made a plan of action. He would move into the office and would stay in there until I invited him back into my bed. We would start couple’s therapy as soon as we could. He would also start seeing a therapist individually. Before we got into town I also told him my final request for our reconciliation. I wanted to see other people. I had been with him since I was nineteen, I have never faltered in my devotion to him. I wanted to see if he was really the one for me.

When I got home, I poured out the rest of my alcohol, save for a bottle of champagne I was saving for our anniversary. He took Stella outside to go potty and came back singing her name “Stella bella, who is a good girl? Your Mama picks good puppies, yes she does. Good girl, Stella bella.”

Stella came prancing back to me with her tail wagging happily. He walked up behind me, and grazes the backs of my arms gently with his knuckles, leaning down to kiss my neck. “Not yet, Sy. I don’t want us to complicate things more than they already are.”

“Josie, what do you mean?”

“I don’t want to have sex with you until we start therapy.”

“So you want us to stop having sex, sleep in separate rooms and at some point you want to start seeing other men.” He starts nodding. He lets out a deep sigh and closes his eyes. “Okay, it that’s what you want to do. I was thinking about getting my stuff out of the bedroom so I can try to get some sleep. I love you, Pussycat. I’ll see you in the morning.” And with that, James went to bed. He was snoring on the couch in the office by the time I went to go lay down.

****

It took us three weeks to get into see a couples therapist. It felt a little validating about my decision that we shouldn’t sleep together until we have really decided to try or not. She had me stay behind and talk with her for another half an hour the first time we met. She asked me why I wanted to save my marriage with Sy if he’s hurt me for years.

“I don’t rightly know,” I told her. “Maybe its because when we are good we are so damn good. Before we were married, I was warned, I knew that things happened overseas and I shouldn’t take it personally, he’s just a man and not a saint. I never have had a doubt in my mind about if he’s been faithful when he’s been here until recently when a woman he knows started acting weird around me. The love we had was so passionate, like sometimes he thought that if he couldn’t put his hands on me I would disappear. I don’t think I will ever find someone who can love me like that again.”

The therapist suggested that he starts getting treated for PTSD and anger management while we all were working together. I would also have my own separate sessions to work on my own issues. It took a few months but I started seeing small differences in how he was handling things at work that pissed him off. He was able to defuse himself more easily. He became more open with his feelings. I think it helped that we both stopped drinking. We could be a little volatile when we had a pitcher (or three) of margaritas.

There were days with our sessions where we leave emotionally exhausted and not speak to each other the rest of the day, some of them ended in peals of laughter, others where I would cry for most of it. We discussed the infidelity at great lengths. I don’t want to rehash the details but it was definitely one of the bad days. But it seems that the root cause was him using the only the other women for comfort after fairly traumatic events. It’s why it only happened on deployments. He needed to feel something other than pain.

The lack sexual intimacy between the two of us made James start to get creative to initiate closeness between the two of us. He started helping me make dinner on the weekends, or he would bring me my coffee in the morning the way I like it. Mama and Teddy started coming over occasionally for suppers. It was nice to have the house filled with laughter. We started talking again like when we first started dating. He would take the time to go with me grocery shopping.

He started asking me out on dates again. Myself, him and Stella would drive out to the country, with a picnic basket that he would even prepare himself and we would go star gazing like we used to. I loved seeing the effort, but that hole still ached in my chest the whole time. The pieces should have all fit together, but here I was still not sure I could commit to him for the rest of my life.

On one of these dates, he asked me what I thought about him retiring. He had been in for almost nineteen years at this point and had far exceeded is expectations for being in the Army as an officer.

“I kind of just want to sell off all our extra shit and buy a really nice Air-stream. We can pull it with my truck. Just travel up and down the continent, I know you always have wanted to see the Northern Lights, we can just go anywhere. Me, you and Stella would visit where ever we could find a parking spot.”

“That sounds nice, Sy.” It came out a little half hearted.

“You don’t sound convinced, sweetheart.” He said, started sounding concerned.

“Hun, I don’t want to have a fight right now, so please just let me get this off my chest.” I sigh. And then I told him about the pain in my chest that I’ve had since my night in jail. That sometimes, like tonight, it was only a dull ache. That other times the edges are still so sharp that it feels like the pain was going to swallow me whole. He sits up, jaw dropped.

“Why haven’t you told me this before? I… Jo… son of a bitch.” He groans. He lays back down, the same defeated tone came back that I hadn’t heard since Mama’s house. “I’m trying my best, Josephine, but I feel like I have one hand tied behind my back… you will never love me again, will you? I can grovel, and beg. I don’t know what else I need to do. I know what I want to do, but it will just hurt you more.”

“What do you want to do, Sy?”

“I want to kiss every part of your skin, remind your body that I worship it. I want to pin you to the wall of our hallway and make love to you. I want to go to sleep with my nose buried in in your hair, and wake up sliding inside of you. I have since you came home. Hell, I always want to do that with you. But that can’t be the only thing that keeps us together.” He looked over at Stella sprawl out.

“I didn’t say this to hurt you, hun. I just wanted to be honest with you.”

“I know, I… just don’t want to cause you more misery. I really thought we were, you know, heading back in the right direction.”

“We have been, and honestly, I think if we threw in the towel now, it would cause more harm than good.” I say as the tears well up in my eyes. For the first time since I was taken away, I straddle his hips. He sits up and I place my hands on either side of his face, then lean in to kiss him. He kisses me back with the same hunger. I missed him. The ache dulled a little until he pulled away.

“Let’s get going, Jo, I want you so fucking bad. I want to take you here and now, I want to make you scream my name and damn anyone who catches us. We need to stop this, the agreement was that we wouldn’t. Fuck I’ve missed how you taste.” He said before stealing one more kiss.

*****

The next week was awkward to say the least, the therapist was pleased about the kissing and that I opened up. She said that it was possible that the pain would go away, but that he and I needed to remember that it was like I was grieving. In the mean time, we should continue to take it slowly because we both needed to be sure. The following few days he was distant, and the ache returned in full force.

With his PTSD treatments, he was having less nightmares. It was the best thing I could ask for. There were still times where he would yell in his sleep but they had become farther and farther apart. It was a night after he had his individual treatment, he had come home talking about how he felt the night of my breakdown. He came home and told me a little bit, how he had never seen me so angry before, thrashing about like a caged animal. He hated himself for pushing me there. That night, in the darkness of the small hours, I woke up from being dead asleep hearing him say my name in a panic. He then repeated sounding more and more scared. “Josie, oh my god, Josie, no. I’m sorry Jo, I didn’t mean to. JoJo!”

I rushed into the office, he was jerking violently in his sleep about on the couch. I turned on the light near his head. When these dreams happen, his eyes were usually opened, it creeps my out every time. I start to gently wake him up, saying his name and touching him as gently as possible. It took a few moments but he came back to me.

“Jo, Jesus fuck, you’re alright?”

“Of course I am, sweetheart, what happened? I’m right here, I’m okay, you are okay, everything is okay.”

“I dreamed we were back in the kitchen, you were under me. Screaming and whipping about. I had to restrain you more then I accidentally broke your neck and you died in my arms. It felt real, baby, I was holding your body and then the sheriff came and that’s when you woke me up. Oh my god. I fucking can’t. I can’t anymore. I need you, Josie. If something happens to you, oh fuck.” I have never seen James sob like this. He pawed at me until I was wrapped in his arms. I slipped my arms around his neck and held his head to mine. His sobs were hard. We sat there until he let it all out.

“Come on, big man, let’s get you into bed. Come with me. I’ll stay with you all night.” He nodded at me and followed me to the bed we used to share. I wrapped him up in our fluffy blankets. He snuggled into me and was asleep in moments. I stayed there in his arms until he woke up. The Syverson shaped hole hurt less that night.

When he woke up he started crying again. He held me and started kissing my face. “Thank god. I thought you coming to me last night was another dream.”

“No baby, I’m here.” He sniffed hard and squeezed me closer to him. We went back to sleep for a few more hours and when we got up for the day he moved his things back into our bedroom. We might not have started other marital acts but we both started sleeping better having the other person in bed. It had been almost six months we started trying to reconcile.

*****

It had been an interesting couple of months while we started the transition for him to retire. Soon it was only a matter of days. The dates had continued, the kissing had continued, but something was keeping me back from being able to say that the next step was what I wanted. Therapy continued, and we would be seeing her for the next few months. Before I left my private session she asked me if I had given myself a deadline. She was concerned that I might keep dragging it out and that would just make both of us miserable. I told her I had an idea and that I planned on pulling the trigger soon.

Sy’s superiors were setting up a retirement ceremony for him, followed by a dinner with the upper chain of command. He wasn’t looking forward to it, Sy just wanted to be out and done. He came home one day while I was watching a show based on a book series I had read when we first were married. The redheaded Scot swore fealty to his wife, offering to pierce his own heart with a dagger if he should ever rebel against her again.

“What’s this you’re watching?” He asked.

“Outlander, it just picked back up again from a season break. It’s pretty damn close to the book.”

“So is this what the ladies like these days, men in kilts offering to off themselves if they fuck up?”

“Women have liked men in kilts since I can remember. Why do you think we go to the Renn Faire every year.” I wink at him. “But yeah, I’m sure that does it for some people.”

“Well shit, Pussycat, it’s the only thing I haven’t done.” Sy walked out of the room and came back with his favorite hunting knife. It had been his dad’s once upon a time. The handle was made out of buck horn. In his warn and dusty uniform, he knelt in front of me on the living room floor. His beautiful blue eyes looking into mine, “Well, this isn’t iron, and it definitely isn’t holy. However, I will swear on it either way. Josephine, you are the only woman I have ever loved, you are my best friend, and I adore you. I will never do anything to make you doubt that love or loyalty again. If I ever do anything that makes you feel like you are less than the beautiful, smart, incredible, sexy creature that you are, you can sink this right in my heart. I will even hold it there for you so all you have to do is press it right in.” He finishes with a tongue click as an exclamation.

“James, you didn’t need to do this. You know I am weird about grand gestures.”

“No, I think I do. I said my vows to you on our wedding rings and I wasn’t able to keep it. But, I will never break this one. If I can earn your love back, I will never do anything to make you regret giving me this chance to be your man.” He still held the knife against his chest with one hand, and placed my hand over his with the other. “So what do you think, baby girl? We still have a long way to go, but I can’t think of anyone else I would rather struggle with.”

“I think you just put yourself in a position that I could just end you now if I wanted to.” I say with my usual sass.

“Yes, you could. I don’t think you will though.” He said smiling, his voice was husky and deep as usual. I love that easy smile of his.

“Is it wrong that I want to get on your lap and make out with you while I hold this against you.” His eyebrow raised. “Maybe more than just make out with you.”

“Oh, don’t you tease me now, sweet thing. I don’t want to start anything you won’t finish.”

“Who said I won’t finish it, Colonel Syverson?” His eyes grew as big as dinner plates.

“Wait, do you mean it?” He choked.

“Yeah, I do mean it.” I laughed. Before I could get up, he had hiked the skirt of the dress I was wearing up to my hips, pulling me to the edge of the sofa, revealing that I had skipped a certain garment that day. “I had an idea for after supper, but if you want we can do this now…. Oh fuck I’ve missed this.”

Before I can even finish my sentence, he was going to town with his tongue on his favorite part of my body. He remembered everything that made me squeal in delight. From the lack of sex on both of our ends, he was able to get me off easily. My body was desperate for his touch. He stopped once my body was trembling, kissing one of my thighs from my apex to my knee. He suddenly grunted and bit down on a tender part. He started panting and kissed the spot he bit.

“I’m sorry, sugar, I didn’t want to only last for two or three thrusts. Fuck, I have missed this pretty pussy. You taste so good.” He had a handful of his own cum and looked around for a tissue. Without a word, I grabbed his hand and licked it clean, keeping eye contact with him the entire time. He moaned out and then stood up. He took his shirt off, and lifted me up off the couch. I knew this hurt his back and knees but I wasn’t about to chastise him for wanting to be romantic. He carried me like we were on our honeymoon back to the bedroom. He lay me down as gently as possible then finished stripping himself. I took my dress off leaving myself exposed to him in a way that I haven’t in almost a year. Sy joined me on the bed, open and vulnerable to me. I loved those thick thighs and torso of his, he always eclipsed me.

“Hello ladies, nice to finally see you again.” He purred as he licked and sucked on my nipples. He leaned to one side and massaged my breasts with one of his hands. “Glad to see you that you missed me too.”

Before long, I could feel his erection pressing against my thigh. He spread my legs and rubbed himself against my opening. He leaned down and kissed my neck before sliding himself inside of me. I moan his name as he gently started making love to me. Bearing his weight on his elbows, he kissed and nipped at my neck.

Breathlessly, he told me how much he missed my body, how much he loved me, how lucky he was to have me. As his tempo increased, he started to whisper in me ear.

“Josephine, tell me what you are.” I looked at him confused. “You are my wife, I want you to tell me that you are my wife.”

“I’m your wife, James.” I tell him as lovingly as possible.

“Louder, baby.”

“I’m your wife.” I said loud and clearly. The Syverson shaped hole in my chest is gone, finally. Replaced with the warmth of knowing we were going to be able to survive this.

“Even louder, Jo.” I yell it out and he thrusts harder and deeper. “Keep going, beautiful, I want the whole neighborhood to know.”

I screamed it as he started pounding me harder, building his orgasm. As my own starts its crescendo, I screamed his name and arched my back as he pulls my hips down on himself and spilled into me. He lay down beside me, twitching and jerking a little. He kisses all the parts of my skin that is available to his reach.

“I think we should order a pizza for dinner tonight,” He says after a few minutes of catching his breath. “So we can stay in bed and make love again.”

“Or, and hear me out. I put my dress back on, you get dressed and we go out for sushi with your cum dripping down my thighs. What do you think about that?”

“Shit, I missed you being a damn freak like that. Do I we get to have more fun tonight if I say yes?” He chuckles, then kisses my hand, “I still want you to ride me with my knife pointed at me some time tonight.”

“Aren’t you scared I’m going to cut off a nipple or something.”

“You, with a knife? To be honest, cutting off my nipple is the least of my concerns. How do I know if this just isn’t a whole plan to lure me into complacency with sex and sushi, then you just murder me in my sleep.” He rolled onto his back and whined for a second, but got up. He put on a pair of khaki shorts and a black Metallica t-shirt as I got into my dress again.

“God damn woman, you are so fucking sexy.” He tells me as he opens the door on my side of the truck and leans down to kiss me again. As I climb up he give my butt a little tap just like he used to and closes the door for me. The ache I’ve been feeling these long months has subsided. Sitting across the cab from me, holding my hand, he asks if we want to go look at travel trailers this weekend. For the first time in a while, I feel like everything is going to be alright.

#henry cavill #henry cavill smut #henry cavill fanfic #my apologies to henry cavill #captain syverson

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thelowlysatsuma · 4 years

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y’all know what? fuck it. time for headcanons

so. SO. logan, patton, and janus being the Tired Adult Friends

they are. so fucking tired

they have two brain cells that they share between the three of them in order to keep the other sides in line. patton is least often seen in possession of them, but sometimes he’ll show up with them in hand

they do “boring adult shit” for fun like go drink wine together and talk shit about the others

they’ve each had turns having to stop the other two from getting too into something and doing something monumentally stupid. janus had to stop a sleepless marathon of sherlock holmes audiobooks. patton had to disarm MANY dangerous thought experiments. logan had to prevent the great puppy heist of 2020.

the all listen to the adventure zone together. logan and janus take turns awkwardly reassuring patton when the swearing/innuendos get too much. they all get a little weepy over lucretia. patton dresses up as magnus one day and forces the other two to cosplay with him. they go as john (jan goes ALL OUT with the eye imagery) and barry (logan allegedly didn’t wanna put in the effort, but actually did some very convincing skull makeup) respectively.

they have a group chat and all silently judge each others’ texting styles

patton: check out this cool meme I saw on Facebook!

janus, looking into the camera like he’s on the office before checking out the meme he’s seen 17272818272828 times before: you’re doing amazing, sweetie; I love it

PRANK WARS!!!! but lovingly!!!

patton and logan fill janus’ room with cats. logan denies being a part of the scheme, but he was VERY excited about it. janus walks into the common room covered in cat hair and ready to murder

logan and janus bonding over art theory and shit talking famous artists

logan and janus are science buddies!! it is terrifying! do not let these two be alone together because they will Wreak Havoc!

patton: *sticks up for someone who’s hurt*

logan: 👀👀👀👀👀😳

janus: 🙄

logan walks into a room and patton starts gushing abt how happy he is to see him and janus is done with this sappy feelings bullshit so he says “wow, glad to see you too, friends of mine” and patton immediately Pouts and does puppy dog eyes and goes in for a hug

*distant explosions* *roman screaming*

logan and janus, in unison: not it

any time patton understands or references a dirty joke/swear word, janus puts a quarter in a jar. it’s half full, but nobody will ever believe him

i would say cuddle piles, but knowing these three dipshits it’s more likely that logan passed out annotating papers on the couch, patton fell asleep beside logan waiting for him to wake back up so he could say hi, and janus just flopped down on top of both of them because he honestly doesn’t give a shit anymore

they do just. the most ridiculous competitions together. patton gets a visitor’s pass to the imagination so he can whip up a wipeout course for them. logan makes them games of jeopardy. janus hosts EXCELLENT murder mystery parties

patton may be bad at most board and card games, but if you try to beat him in uno, you will face death in the face. janus finds this hilarious up until it gets turned on him

in their group chat, patton will yell at the others for being up late, in spite of the fact that he himself is also up late

okay but if you think they don’t gossip about stupid fictional crushes together then You Are Wrong

janus is just as touchy feeley as patton, but he leans more towards arms around shoulders and back claps than hugs

patton, entering the common room, hands dripping red:

janus: oh my god he finally killed somebody

logan: absolutely not. the consistency is all wrong for blood. he stuck his hands in a bucket of kool aid

patton, who’d just returned from helping dye roman’s hair: guys, could you lighten up a little?

patton and janus cry together at 3am over that one time a cornsnake curled around thomas’ arm and it was very cute.

logan and janus shit talk discrepancies in popular media, especially doctor who. patton is generally just there for the good shows and the snacks.

janus: shut up, fives. a ten is talking.

logan: we all have the same face???

god save anyone on the receiving end of the combined powers of patton’s “i’m not mad, I’m just disappointed”, logan’s “explain what exactly you think you’re doing right now”, and janus’ “why are you like this you dumbass” glares

patton makes them friendship bracelets. logan and janus both hide theirs on their person but patton knows they keep them with them at all times

patton tries to convince the entire mindscape to go as the scoobies for halloween one year. he and janus divide and conquer with the core four and the others, and together, they manage to pull it off. remus is a truly horrifying scrappy doo

logan goes through a pirate kick for a little bit and teaches the other two how to duel. patton is surprisingly good at it, and logan dies a bit inside. janus thinks all this is fucking hysterical, and appreciates it immensely

they play calvinball together once. only once.

“sincerely meeeeeeEEEEEEE” “siNCERELY MEE”

yeah don’t even get started on all the musicals they do karaoke of. logan and janus insist it was patton’s idea, which it was, but they’re filthy liars who have just as much fun as patton

janus: *turns on anaconda*

logan: *plays phantom of the opera along to it*

when they get bored they just lie on top of one another, throw wads of paper at the walls of the commons, and play word association games

they fuckin Jam Out to schoolhouse rock. don’t tell me they wouldn’t

anyways I’m back on my sanders sides bullshit, y’all. please feel free to throw some more headcanons out there

( @coconut-cluster : 👀👀👀)

#sanders sides #ts spoilers #logicality #kinda #ts deceit #ts remus #janus sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #moceit friendship #logicality friendship #loceit friendship #platonic moceit #platonic loceit #platonic logicality #ts janus #ts patton #ts logan

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creativeashproductions · 3 years

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Faded Memories // Julie Molina

Summary: After the death of her mother more than music is dropped from Julie’s life. Julie breaks up with her best friend turned then girlfriend Ramona. When Ramona gets closure it causes Julie remembers that Ramona was more than a girlfriend. She was her best friend too.

Warning: Swearing, talk of death, break-up, angst (ain’t new here), Julie and Ramona are ex-girlfriends and no happy ending (oops)

Characters: ex!Julie Molina x ex!Ramona Monet (just worked better with an OC even when it will get less traction, sorry)

Words: 2.9k

A/N: So in my Charlie Gillespie imagine A Walk Down The Aisle the reader played a character Ramona Monet on the show. @leave-reality-behind wanted a fic off the tiny scene I wrote. So here you go.

Please ask to be tagged in my inbox because I can’t promise you will through commenting on the fics.

Masterlist

Ramona Monet’s deep burgundy lips manoeuvred into an ‘o’ as she released a deep breath of air sending her fringe flying. The last place she wanted to be was the spirit rally, but her Pops had banned for from the hidden gem in the older parts of LA. Ramona’s love of old movies stemmed from the many times her father had dropped her off at the movie theatre on his way to work. Being banned and her best friend performing at the rally is the only reason she would show her face.

Ramona had chosen a red tartan shirt with her fishnets that would more than likely land her in Principle Lessa’s office. As usual, she would fight ‘it broke dress code’ earing a little less respect from the adult but admiration for the quick retorts. Ramona made her way to the gym as the first beat of Carrie’s song played, her black ankle boots finding the way to the bleachers.

“Hey, Monet,” Nick spoke, leaning forward from his concealed position in the nest of jocks. The kind blonde had always been lovely to his girlfriend’s best friend.

“Nick.” Ramona nodded looking back as Carrie burst into the fast pace choreography that went with the pop song.

Dirty Candi’s music was not what Ramona listened to, but she couldn’t fault that it was a catchy song that would be in everyone’s head for days. From a distance, Carrie’s brown eyes finding Ramona wearing her self-made merch.

Ramona’s shirt sported the letters of Dirty Candi in the iconic colours Carrie had stressed over in the beginning. The black shirt was bleached in a tie-dye fashion, but it made Carrie’s heart flutter at the supportive friend she had.

“Whoo!” Ramona called over the loud background noise as Carrie gracefully dropped to perform the floor choreo. The words referencing to the band Queen made the teen girl knowing it was Carrie’s way of acknowledging the car karaoke.

Ramona’s attention was brought to the side where two girls were watching the performance. Flynn and Julie had been in the back of Ramona’s mind since the accident happened; Ramona’s heart dropped at the girl. Julie and Ramona had a good history tainted by tragic loss and teenage angst.

Ramona and Julie had been childhood best friends being a few houses from each other and that history was bittersweet. The two girls had nervously shared their first kisses in the now dilapidated treehouse in the Monet’s backyard. A relationship bloomed like a flower in the morning sun before the sun was concealed behind a storm cloud. Julie’s mom died, and Julie asked for a break.

Now everyone knows that a break is really a breakup and the naïve girlfriends had believed that. Then as Julie struggled with music, she struck out to the closest person, her girlfriend and Ramona found herself dumped. The dumping shattered Ramona’s heart, and the friend group divided. Flynn chose Julie and Carrie, disgusted by the cruel words, chose Ramona in a true Carrie fashion; Carrie and Ramona had initially only interacted together for their mutual friend/girlfriend. Then Ramona’s heart was obliterated when days later, she caught Julie staring at Nick with the same look Ramona used to get.

Ramona’s head turned to disregard the girl that had run out of music class the previous day during her performance. Rumours circulated by the end of the day that Julie Molina had been officially kicked out of the program; Ramona was both sad and relieved. Julie’s own head turned to catch the profile of her ex-girlfriend.

“Go Bobcats!” Carrie Wilson chimed strutting off to the girls change room for the dramatic exit. Needing a break from Julie, the Monet girl followed Dirty Candi into the change room.

“Nailed it,” Ramona spoke, revealing white teeth behind her dark lipstick gaining the pink-haired girl’s attention. Carrie’s face beamed at the compliment.

Ramona and Carrie Wilson couldn’t be farther in comparison with their different tastes and appearance. Carrie was all pink and glittery while Ramona was grunge and angst. Ramona was the one to push Carrie into making a YouTube channel, even promoting the group to Ramona’s followers without prompting.

“Oh! Thank you!” Carrie tugged her best friend into her arms, choking her taller friend with the tight embrace.

“So, I overheard Julie and Flynn when I walked by the music room. Julie’s going to perform for Mrs Harrison.” Ramona warned her best friend concerned as Carrie’s complexation changed to make the gaudy pink wig, “OH!”

Carrie’s French manicure gouged Ramona’s bare arm as she was tugged after the teenager back into the gym. A gasp fell from both their lips as Kayla, the purple dancer for Dirty Candi appeared. The three students rushed the stage where three guys popped out of nowhere on the stage.

“What the hell?” Ramona demanded watching her ex-girlfriend break out of her music shell, “Wow.”

“What do you mean ‘wow’ Ro?” Carrie asked in exasperation as her best friend stared at the stage, enjoying the music being played. Carrie scoffed only to soften when she saw the expression on Ramona, “Ro, she doesn’t deserve you. She never did.”

The sad smile appeared on Ramona’s face as her eyes met the bass player’s wink. Ramona flushed at the attention taken aback from the confidence. For a split-second, Ramona considered wiggling her way into the band to get back at Julie.

But while Ramona dressed like a confident badass, it was inside that she felt alone and hurt that Julie was doing so well without her. That sent rage flooding Carrie’s body so when Kayla fawned over the band Carrie glared at her. Kayla dropped her head at the glare.

“I’m gonna go,” Ramona spoke walking away from the stage and her ex who apparently, she still had feelings for. God help Ramona. Why was it when Ramona was shaking the feeling that Julie had to come back with a bang?

Ramona was striding out of the gym as the band disappeared, leaving the Molina girl alone to explain. Ramona leaned against the bathroom sink uncaring of the germs in carried staring at the teen in the mirror. The bubbling sadness faded down, remembering the changes that had happened, she was better without Julie.

Ramona walked back into the hall, catching the tail end of Julie’s conversation with absolutely no one near her. Ramona’s mossy green eyes rolled as she walked by the younger girl the bubble of anger reaching the surface. The sheepish smile on Julie’s face as a concerned custodian pushed his cart by.

“Oh, so does this girl.” Reggie spoke, watching as a rocker chick made a wide berth around his only remaining alive friend, “Ooh, she’s pretty.”

Julie watched the older girl walk by keeping her gaze ahead, “Hey Mona.”

Ramona cast a weird look at the other girl with a roll of her eyes, “Good on you for performing. Surprised someone other than Flynn survived Bitch Bomb 2019.”

Ramona turned around the corner of lockers leaving the Puerto Rican’s shoulders to deflate at the remind of Flynn running off. Sunset Curve watched the interaction with raised brows flicking between the very different girls.

“What was that about?” Alex wondered, viewing the sad expression of the gifted singer’s face. The utter sadness reminding him of when he broke up with his first boyfriend in ’93 and the lingering feeling.

“That was Ramona.” Julie sighed, picking at the braided bracelet on her wrist that had matched the one you used to wear.

Being fourteen without jobs and little allowance gifts had been mostly thrifted or homemade so for the six month anniversary they had braided bracelets. They had never come off their wrists until the breakup; Ramona had cut it off in a puddle of tears. Julie couldn’t bring herself to remove hers.

“When did Julie get smart enough to how about holograms?” Carrie scoffed as Ramona joined her at the lab table. The performance lingering like a bad taste of the girl’s tongue, “I worked weeks on that song! It was so hard getting Katy’s choreographer to help.”

“Carrie she-“

“She is so stupid! We’ve all lost someone, and we didn’t pull a Bitch Bomb 2019.” Carrie exclaimed referring to the first months of Julie’s grief-led wrath.

Carrie was both right and wrong in that sense because everyone grieved differently, Carrie would do retail shopping. Ramona’s way of dealing was locking herself in a room with a piano and lugging up water balloons to a roof; very Peyton Sawyer of her. Julie never reached out to apologize for her actions, but Ramona blocked her on everything.

“Car focus on the lab. You still have that bomb-ass song you’re working on.” Ramona sympathized with the teen. Carrie nodded her head, deciding to not focus on some girl with a fluke of a performance; Julie almost puked on the piano a few days ago, so her surprise band was probably a one-time thing.

“Don’t you have anything better than-“

“Carrie do you hear something?” Ramona pursed her lips, scanning the classroom with a feigned look of confusion. Carrie’s lips twitched at her best friend’s antics, “I swore I heard the voice of irrelevance.”

“Ooh and I swore I smelt gutter water perfume too.” Carrie flicked her hair over her shoulder, smirking at Flynn’s look of anger, “Mr. Taylor! Flynn threatened to burn me!”

Mr Taylor turned his attention from Kayla to Flynn’s expression of disbelief and the glare directed at the table ahead. Putting on a look of shock, Ramona appeared genuinely flabbergasted to the chemistry teacher.

“Flynn, that’s detention.” Mr Taylor spoke, turning back to Kayla.

“You bit-“Flynn was cut off by the bell ringing. Ramona and Carrie had already left the confident girl in the room. Flynn was fuming with both Julie’s lying and the unfair detention because of two popular vindictive girls.

One would expect Ramona Monet, as a member of the music program, to play guitar or drums. However, Ramona was a classically trained pianist with an affinity with stringed instruments as well. The Monet family had a footing in the music world with her mother taught in the same way, and her father a composer.

“Oh! Sorry.” Ramona’s intense focus on the music enchanting the room was pulled as the awkward form stood in the entrance.

“Seriously, Molina?” Ramona winced as her hands fell on the keys creating an ear gouging shriek. Her green eyes shining brighter with the bare face she had chosen with little motivation for makeup, “I’ve been using this room every day at the same time since freshman year. You should know that. Guess I really wasn’t even an afterthought.”

Ramona’s hand shoved soft top binder of her notes in her black bag covered in many pins and embroidered patches. Her bright pink nail polish surprising Julie but her eyes drowned in the form-fitting ripped black jeans with the wine red cable knit sweater. Cheeks flushing Julie stuttered.

“S-sorry. I just-“

“Whatever.” Ramona shoved passed her ex-girlfriend, “Why do you even wear that?”

Julie glanced at the meaningful bracelet that Ramona intensely stared at with the dark and light strings braided. Julie’s eyes fell to see Ramona no longer wore braided bracelets but a bracelet with a moon charm.

“It means a lot.”

“Just not the person.” Ramona darkly chuckled, “Kinda childish?”

Julie shuffled uncomfortably on her feet picking at her cuticle at the insult her antagonist ex threw at her. Three ghosts glared at the Monet girl pissed at the unfair treatment she was giving Julie.

“Hey! What the hell is your problem?” Luke snapped, stepping forward even as Alex made his input of it being unnecessary; they were dead. To Alex shock, the disgruntled girl shifted her gaze from Julie to the trio.

“My problem is none of your damn business Uncle Jesse.” Ramona spat earning raised brows at her reference.

“Did she die in the ’90s too?” Reggie stage whispered to his best friend staring the pretty brunette down. Ramona’s eyes rolled.

“Should have known. The only people Julie didn’t scare off would be the dead.” Ramona snarked twisting on her heel to storm off into the distance.

“I’m sorry!” Julie yelled, bringing the brunette to a dead stop with her foot not planted on the floor yet as the apology finally came.

All Ramona had ever wanted was Julie to apologize for her shitty decision to dump Ramona cruelly. Using bitter words on her personal life to drive the wedge but the final nail in the coffin was the slammed door in Ramona’s face.

“For what?” Ramona seethed, “For asking for space and screaming when I gave it? Dumping me and acting like I was the black plague? How about when you forgot about my audition? Burning the flowers, I sent for the funeral? Or making breaking off communication and Flynn completely ignoring me?”

“Oh damn.” Luke murmured, stepping back to the drummer and bassist floored at the confrontation. His heart dropped, finally understanding why Julie avoided all topics relating to Ramona.

“I was wrong.” Julie admitted, “I pushed you away. I got mad when you gave me what I wanted. I should have talked to you and not broke up with you that way I did.”

“She burnt funeral flowers. “Alex whispered to Reggie, surprised at the out of character action from his new friend.

“I chose you over my audition. I chose to offer support for my best friend, not just my then-girlfriend, on one of her worst days. I get to the funeral, and you refused to let me say goodbye to the woman that practically raised me as well.” Ramona calmed down, staring at the younger girl breaking apart in front of her.

It felt like a weight dropped off Ramona’s shoulders or the chains of heartbreak and confusion unlocked with the key of closure. The clouds disappeared, letting the sun help the flowers bloom after a year of rain. A genuine smile spread on the girls face as Julie’s dropped at the beautiful sight.

“I hope you well Birdie.” Julie’s heart fluttered at the pet name Ramona had coined for the teenager. It shortened from songbird to birdie, and Julie hadn’t heard in what felt like years, “I gotta go. It’s filming day.”

Julie went pushed into a memory.

Summer 2018

The camera was entirely set on Ramona in the treehouse that her Pop had built when she was five years old. Fourteen-year-old Ramona was relaxing as she fixed her white off-shoulder crop top to be straight once more. The cover of the song accompanied by her acoustic guitar was pretty to the years of the short girl at the entrance.

“I still think it’s cheesy to call it Music Monday.” Ramona told the camera with a shy smile after strumming the last note. Her eyes meeting the girl that tackled her in a hug, “Birdie!”

“Birdie?” Julie questioned leaning back from her kissing attacks on every inch of her dirty-blonde girlfriend.

“Songbird is a bit of a mouthful.” Ramona blushed hiding in Julie’s neck unaware of the camera still rolling. The blush deepened at the lingering kiss to Ramona’s hairline.

“I love it.” Julie softly spoke, leaning back to gaze into Ramona’s green eyes swimming in the soft feeling.

Julie Molina and Ramona Monet had been the classic best friends with hidden crushes that shattered one afternoon. Ramona was nervous about a date she had the next day, and she had never kissed anyone. Julie, awed by her best friend, admitted she’d never kissed anyone and so in a cliché, the girls decided to share their first kiss. Feelings were revealed, and the two started to date.

“So, what brings you here.” Ramona asked, stopping the camera from recording as her girlfriend shifted, “What’s up?”

“If you’re ready I’d like to have you over for dinner.” Julie shyly asked, avoiding Ramona’s gaze.

“That’s not new Birdie.” Ramona chuckled helping the shorter girl to her feet fingers caressing the bracelet that was a twin to her own. Julie’s eyes flicked down to the light pink shorts that matched the butterfly click in Ro’s hair.

“Not as my best friend. As my girlfriend.” Julie murmured fearing the response.

“Should I call your parents Mr and Mrs.” Ramona wondered, kissing Julie’s cheek as the other girl relaxed at the statement. Julie feared Ramona wasn’t ready or didn’t want to be at that stage in the relationship, “If you are ready, then so am I.”

“You’re the best thing to happen to me.” Julie beamed, “Oh! I wanna show you the song Mom, and I made!”

Julie tugged her pretty girlfriend to the front of the house to lead her to the Molina’s garage they renovated into a music studio. The girls’ laughter floating in the summer breeze, the relationship blooming under the sun as it developed further. Naïvely the two young teens believed nothing could rip them apart, if only they knew.

“So, I’m guessing she’s off-limits?” Reggie offered as he bounced on his heels, attempting to lighten the mood. The glare from Julie was enough to answer that question.

“Reg. Firstly, don’t date your friend’s ex. Secondly, you’re dead.” Alex deadpanned at his best friend to turn to Julie, “Are you okay?”

“No.” Julie honestly spoke, “I guess I never realized that losing my girlfriend also meant I would lose my best friend.”

On the other side of the school, Ramona Monet could finally smile as the memories with Julie regained the colour grief had erased. Ramona Monet was better than fine, she was happy.

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#julie molina imagines #julie molina x reader #julie molina x oc #julie and the phantoms imagines #julie and the phantoms #ex!julie molina x ex!girlfriend #angst #julie molina #jatp fanfic #caitsy and ash productions

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #322

“you will hear it when your god cries / you will see it when the sun dies / upon the altars of change”

What is your favorite nickname that you’ve had? "Bee," from my old best friend. I don't want others calling me it, though. Where did you go on the best date you’ve been on? A big arcade. It was a super fun double-date. Have you ever gotten a professional massage? No, and I don't want one. It'd be so awkward. What’s your favorite milkshake flavor? Chocolate. What act would you be most likely to perform in a talent show? I got nothin'. If you had braces, do you wear your retainers still? I don't. If you had braces, have your teeth moved since you got them off? Yep, because of the whole "not wearing my retainer" thing. Whose was the first baby shower you remember attending, and for what baby? I'm unsure. Possibly my sister's for her first daughter. Do you know anyone personally who’s lost a child? Many people. When was the last time you did something that felt like rebellion? So every now and again, I get a massive craving for soda at night, so I grab one from the kitchen and can hear my sleeping mother rightfully nagging me about it, haha... What is one present you got for your last birthday? Ashley got me this really cool skull bank that says "tattoo fund" on it, aha. I love it. What is one thing that you took to show and tell as a kid? I have a clear memory of bringing a Snorlax plushie one day. Do you remember losing your first tooth? Not my first, no. Are you afraid to pop a balloon? Not really, but it's kinda easy to make me jump just a lil bit when one is popped. When was the last time you laughed when you shouldn’t have? I don't know. Which was better: the first The Lion King or the second? That is fucking HARD. I adore both, but I think the original is slightly better. Do any of your grandparents have a tattoo? I'm pretty sure none of them did. Do you believe that your pets feel love towards you? My cat, definitely. As for my snake, I'm aware that snakes' brains simply aren't developed enough for love, but she clearly trusts me. Are you proud of your body? Fuck no. I'm humiliated by it every waking moment. Watermelon or cherries? I don't like either, but if I had to pick, watermelon. Favourite brand of cookies? I don't really have a favorite brand. Have you ever stuck gum under a desk/chair? No, that shit grosses me out. When shopping at a grocery store, do you return your cart or just leave it? Return your goddamn cart. What is one thing you’d never want your parents to find out? Uhhhh. I guess places I've "done it." When you were little, did you like Dr. Suess books? I did. Do you like eating out at restaurants? Yeah; at least, before Covid. What was your least favorite year of your life so far? Fuck 2016 into the next millenium. Do you like fried bologna? I haven't had it in so long that I don't really remember the taste. I think I would. Have you spent money on a game online? Yeah, very briefly with WoW. Mom was nice enough to refresh my subscription after the breakup (Jason paid for it prior), but from then on, I was rich enough in-game to use monthly game tokens to "pay." Do you put a line through your "7"s? Yes. What about your "Z"s? Also yes. Do you like cold pizza? Yeah, yummy. Do you like broccoli and cheese? Yessss. Toaster or toaster oven? We've always used a toaster oven. What are you most known for? Being artsy, I guess. Do you have any reputations? What are they? *shrug* What was the last thing to leave you speechless? No clue. What is the curviest part of your body? Well, I'm overweight, so it's difficult to tell where I'm naturally curvy... but I guess my hips. Even when I was at a perfectly healthy weight though, I don't think I was exceptionally curvy anywhere. What is your opinion on sex change? You are entirely deserving to feel comfortable in your own body. If you’re still a virgin, how important is your virginity to you? I'm not, though I thought I was when we were together, when we were really just using a loophole. It was a denial thing BECAUSE my virginity was so important to me. If you have lost it already, do you regret it? No. Would you take a break after graduating from high school (like, postpone going to college for a year or so)? I didn't. What regret keeps coming back to haunt you daily? Things I said to Jason. If you could cure yourself of one allergy, what would it be? Pollen. Would you ever post a picture of yourself crying on social media? No. Have you ever held a newborn baby? Yeah, my most recent niece I actually held. I don't THINK I held Aubree or Ryder as newborns because I was so afraid of not doing it right and hurting them. Do you know anyone who has twins? Yeah. Are you following in the career path of any family members? No. What is your favorite country in Europe? Germany. How many times have your comments been top comments on YouTube? A few times. I rarely ever comment, but if I do, it's because I feel like I really have something worth saying. Would you ever wear a wig? I'm not opposed to it. Do you like the moon or sun more? The moon. Do you like turkey or ham more? Ham. Have you ever slapped someone’s butt? Yes. Do you think dimples are ugly? I think they're cute, actually. Have you ever deleted Facebook friends for a significant other? No. Have you ever spent the night in jail? No. Do you consider yourself a good kisser? I assume I am from experiences. Do you watch Pewdiepie? Not anymore, no. His current content doesn't interest me. The most recent thing I watched was his playthrough of The Last of Us 2, because I adore the first game and definitely wanted to see him play the sequel. I think he's pretty funny and have no personal issues against him, though then again I am so uninvolved in the fandom that I have no idea if he's done something stupid again. Do you like "Despacito?" Haha, my mind went to The Dark Den's bearded dragon before the song... I'm not a fan of it, no. Did you ever color your hair pink? No, but I absolutely want to dye it pastel pink one day. :( I even edited a picture of me "testing" different hair colors out, and pastel pink looked suuuuper pretty. Do you drink energy drinks? No, they're too strong for my taste. Do you have any subscribers on YouTube? I don't now how many I have, but I know it's below 100. Do you have a Steam account? Yeah. Have you ever played Five Nights at Freddy’s? No, but I enjoy the franchise. I'm not totally clear on all the lore, though. Do you like religion? Quite honestly, no. Do you swear in front of children? No. What is the next craft you are going to make? There's no telling. I don't really do crafts. What was your favorite Backstreet Boys song? Maybe "The Call." Favorite *N Sync song? I don't remember enough of them, at least not right now. Which of those two bands did you like best? The BSB, baby. Do you learn choreography easily? When I danced, I'd say I learned at a fairly average pace. What’s your favorite candy to receive on Halloween? Reeseeeeeee's. <3 Do you have a bobblehead? No. Have you ever had a lead role in a play? No. Have you ever been insulted or called names by a significant other? No. I wouldn't tolerate that shit. What’s your favorite movie battle scene? Oh man, idk. Maybe something from Troy, though I honestly barely even remember the movie by now, haha. Have you ever been to a same-sex wedding? No, actually. Who takes care of your pet(s) when you’re out of town? Hypothetically, one of my sisters would come to feed and water Roman and clean his box. I'm certain I couldn't talk either into spraying Venus' cage, though... What was the last thing you wrote down on paper? Some group work during therapy. Did you have a Walkman when you were a kid? No. What’s your favorite recipe you’ve come up with? Oh dear, I don't make those. Do you like celery? Yuck, no. By what age could you swallow pills? I dunno. A normal age. Do you like to drink alot of water? I need to drink more. :/ I've gotten better, though. For years, I literally never drank water. How I even survived, idk. How many times have you gone fishing? Countless times. Ever been to a roller-skating rink? Yeah. I loved having bday parties there as a lil'un. What do you refer to your mother as? (Mom, momma, mommy) Mom, Ma, and Mama. Have you ever swam in the ocean? Yeah, multiple times. What is the last movie that made you cry? I think the remake of The Lion King. What would you like to swim in other than water? Nothing? If you could uninvent one thing what would you chose? Damn, just one? Maybe cigarettes? Have you ever read someone's diary? Absolutely not. I respect people's privacy. Have you ever played in a waterfall? No, but that'd be dope. Who has inspired you the most in your life? Probably Mark. Is there a place where everyone who lives near you tends to hang out? Idk. Teens sure do love to hang out at Sonic, though, reving their stupid fucking trucks. Does your alarm clock wake you with music, or with an annoying buzz sound? Music. Did you make it all the way through the Oregon Trail game? Yes; I was obsessed with those as a kid. Lions and tigers and bears, oh my! Which one are you more scared of? I feel like being alone with a tiger would scare me most. Though let's be real, I'd probably try to pet it. Have you ever changed your favorite color? From what to what? It was originally red, but then became pink when I actually understood it was its own color. Then it was maroon forever, and now it's back to pink. On a scale of 1-10, how competitive are you? Eh, 4-6? It depends on the situation, I guess. At what age did your have your most memorable birthday? My 21st, because I was in the psych hospital for it. Yes or no: Guys in skinny jeans? Yeah, man. Yes or no: Girls with dreads? Some people can pull it off. Have you ever attended a themed b-day party? What was the theme? Oh yeah, plenty. Do you have any Eminem on your iPod/MP3 player? I do. Has anybody ever given you a promise ring? No. What do you think about putting ‘spinners’ on cars? So long as they're not too distracting, I don't care. Do what you want with your car - again, so long as it is not disruptive. What celebrity do you wish would have a big comeback? I wish poor Britney Spears could catch a goddamn break and be happy again. She's a legend that doesn't deserve to feel like a puppet. Were you outdoors or indoors more as a kid? I'd say there was a pretty even split. Do you or have you ever owned a horse? No, but I LOVE horses. Have you ever had a relationship that began via text? (weird, I know, but it happens…) Most of my relationships started through a text message. Did you believe in unicorns as a small child? I don’t think so. Would you ever date a guy with longer hair than yourself? Yeah; I have short hair anyway, and I also like long hair on guys. Do you watch the show Wizards of Waverly Place? I used to love that show. Have you ever been to the rainforest? No; humidity aside though, that would be so amazing. Bats are not spooky or are they? I think they're precious. Do you like the song "Womanizer?" I sure do, actually. Do you like ice cream cake? Not really, but I'll eat it. Do you know how to change a tire? Nope. What kind of headphones do you have? Just cheap earplugs. Do you experiment a lot with new looks on yourself? No. What were some fun experiments you did in science class as a kid? Dissecting a frog was my favorite, and doing the same with an owl pellet was also very cool. What was the last strong emotion you felt? Guilt. I lied to get out of group therapy early because I was just NOT feeling it whatsoever that day, and I hate lying. Do you use dry shampoo between washes? No. Have you ever lived with someone you didn’t get along with? No. What types of animals have you had as pets? Jeez, what haven't we had... We've had cats, dogs, snakes, rats, gerbils, a rabbit, hamsters, lizards, fish, guinea pigs... Hell, I'm probably forgetting one or two. Can you name three good things about your most recent ex? She's so creative, a real advocate for proper reptile education and appreciation, and very kind. Name three bands/artists that you hate. Uhhh The Talking Heads, Bob Dylan, and The Police. What’s the best memory you have of your father? Playing softball with him in the front yard, and when he taught me to ride a bike. Should tattoos be meaningful? You get a tattoo for whatever reason you damn well want. I don't plan on all of mine to be meaningful. Some stuff I just want because I think it's cool. Are you afraid of the dark? No. Have you ever been through a trap door? No. What's the most recent good news you’ve heard? Hm. Who was the last person in your family to have a baby? My older sister. When’s the last time you used the microwave? Last night. What’s the worst thing in your life right now? Financial struggles. Have you ever owned a tire swing? No. Does anyone you know own a bird that can talk? No. Have you ever been someplace tropical? Yeah, Florida. Have Jehovah'ss witnessess ever called to your door? Yep. when was the last time you went to mass/church? I have no idea. It's been many years. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? Thank heavens no.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''altaer" by 3teeth

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chaotically-panaro · 3 years

Text

Not What You’d Think // A Solangelo Fanfiction

Lou Ellen dragged me out of her Jeep. I pulled my orange and green flannel closer to myself, and Lou's hair was the only thing I could see in the dark shadows of night as we walk across the . Her neon purple hair was glow-in-the-dark, although not on purpose. For Halloween, she had decided to dye her hair temporarily, and then had called me crying when she discovered it wouldn't wash out. Nonetheless, it fit her well. Very... witch-y.

Her hand closed around my wrist, leading me to Jason's front door. From the outside, we could already hear the music pounding and sweaty bodies slipping against each other.

It wasn't my idea, I swear. Every year, Jason Grace and the rest of the football team hosted an enormous party on the second to last day of spring break. I never went of course, not my crowd. Lou always did, and claimed that 'the booze was worth it.' For some unholy reason, this year, she had decided to drag me. I wasn't prepared at all. I'd never drunk in my life, and didn't plan to now.

"Will? Why are you stopping?" Lou Ellen glanced at me curiously. From her eagerness to go inside, I could tell that I would be manning the wheel tonight. "I'm just nervous, that's all."

I was trying to be 'nice,' at least a little. Lou tried to include me in her antics, and I rarely took up her offers. The one time I do, I might as well try to make her happy. Lou nods, and in her hesitation to twist the doorknob, I'm struck with the hopeless idea that maybe she's going to give up this idea and let me go home and watch Jeopardy reruns. To my dismay, she does twist the knob and reveals Jason Grace's enormous foyer.

"Stay with me?" I whisper to her, and her head of indigo hair turns to me. Her smile softens. "Of course." I breathe a sigh of relief, and clutch her hand. Her eyes drift to something behind me, and she drops my hand. Her black heels click on the marble floor as she runs to her boyfriend, Cecil, effectively leaving me alone.

I walk alone to the punch stand, and pour myself a lonely cup of water. Looking for an empty corner where I can reside for the rest of the night, I slip bast hordes of bodies. "William!" I turn to my left, and find Percy Jackson's intoxicated eyes in front of mine. I step back, stumbling a little on someone's discarded shoe. Percy and I aren't exactly friends, but his little sister and mine play together sometimes. He's obviously drunk, I wonder how long he's been here to be sloshed to quickly. He grabs my wrists, green eyes flicking towards mine.

"Have you seen Jason anywhere? I can't find him, which is very sad because I need to tell him how good he looks tonight..." Drunk Percy clearly has no qualms as to revealing details. He pales. "You weren't supposed to know that. It's just... he's so... kissable. You know?"

I nodd, and grab Percy by the shoulders. I guide him to a discarded couch. "I'll tell Jason where you are. Stay here." He holds onto his cup of undefined substances tighter, and his flushed cheeks nod. Jason is on the other side of the room, talking animatedly with Annabeth and her girlfriend, Piper. I slip between bodies again, trying to ignore the exposed flesh. I reach Jason, and he looks surprisingly sober. "Hey, uh, Percy's looking for you." I point to Percy's general direction, and Jason takes up the hint. He squeezes my hands gratefully, and he goes over to the swim team Captain.

I'm alone again, and I search for a corner. My cup of water is starting to slosh, and I find a french door leading to Jason's backyard. More people are out here, and I sit at the foot of a tree, and decide to simply wait for Lou to finish seducing Cecil. She'll collect me, sooner or later.

I swirl my cup's content, and sip it tentatively. It tastes weird, but that could just be me. Between the parting masses of bodies, someone I had previously overlooked slipped out. Nico di Angelo looks invisible in the dark, especially in his dark clothing. But someone had started flashing neon lights, and his pale skin was illuminated. He stumbled to Jason's wood fence, and I can see him start to trip on his own shoelaces. Bryce Lawrence, who was expelled from school for setting a trash can on fire, tries to help him to stand up. Nico looks up to him gratefully, and from my stance on the dirt ground, I can see Bryce's grip go souther than appropriate. Nico doesn't notice, and his sweat-thick hair clings to his forehead.

I can see Bryce's plan, even if Nico can't. I jump up, and jog over. "Hey! Stop it!" Nico turns to me, red eyes curious. "Stop what? I'm not doing anything." He starts to laugh, for reasons beyond me.

Bryce sighs, he knows he can't do anything. He glares at me, and tries to look for his next prey. I gesture to Reyna on the other side of the lawn, who usually comes to parties like these to stop exactly that from happening. Nico sags, and I catch his underarms in my palms. My hand jerks in Bryce's direction, and Reyna meets my eyes, understanding my point.

I pull Nico to my tree, and observe his cut hands from the fall. They're scraped, but nothing I can't try to heal. "You're cute," he says. I stifle a laugh. He's drunk, his thoughts are scrambled. I keep wrapping his hands, nonplussed. "Really, I mean it. I've been looking at you for a while now." I keep wrapping. "Did you know your eyes are really blue? Like very, very, blue. It's actually a little like a cat. Meow." He laughs, and I grow red. I tie the bandages together, and start to secure them. I try to keep bandages on me at all times, Lou is incredibly accident-prone.

Nico pushes his knees on my chest, and starts to kiss me. His mouth is warm and pink, and then I taste a little vodka. I push him off of me. "You're drunk." He frowns. "So what? I am the master of death, no amount of alcohol incapacitates me." I had my own reasons, beside the fact that it's common sense that someone cannot give consent when intoxicated. I'd had a crush on this guy since first grade, and confessed to him over a stupid game of truth of truth or dare in seventh grade. He said "that's gay," and then didn't talk to me for the rest of Middle School.

"Right now, you can't summon a wishbone, sunshine." Nico glared at me, lips plump and cheeks red from the contents of his cup on the grass. I put the rest of my bandages in my surprisingly large pockets, and Nico gets onto my lap. I push him off gently, trying not to jostle him. I think he's going to throw up soon, and I don't want to bring that moment forth any sooner. He pouts, and crosses his arms. His hair is dark, and looks even darker in the night. "I'm not as drunk as you think I am."

I snort. "You look like you're going to projectile vomit on me." His neck flushed, and his gaze lowered. "I do have a crush on you, it's not a lie."

I drop my cup on the grass, and it meets his. If this guy thinks he has the right to my heart, after he broke it to a thousand pieces, he's wrong. He notices the shift in my eyes, and frowns. He sits back on his heels, and cocks his head. "Do you not like me?" Before I can respond, tears start pooling in his eyes. I wrap my arms around him, trying to ignore the wetness blooming on my shirt. He clutches my flannel, and I look down at him. His throat starts to bob.

Nico vomited on my favorite flannel.

Well, today was bad enough. I didn't need the fates to curse me more, yet here we are. He hiccups, and I pat his head, not sure what I'm supposed to do. He seems to sober up a little, and he covers his eyes with his hand. "Oh my God. I can't believe I just did that. I'm so sorry, Will." I shake my head, and he buries his face in the crook of his elbow.

Nico glances at my flannel-less chest. His face pales. "Did we..." I glance down, and see what it must look like. "No! No, we didn't uh... yeah." We grow silent, and he rubs his forehead.

Lou Ellen pops out of the crowd. "Will! Drive us home?" She's holding Cecil's hand, and I guess they got tired of other people. I did too. I stand up, and brush dirt off of my pants, and wave to Nico. Lou throws me the keys, and we climb into her Jeep. Cecil and Lou are cozy in the backseat, and we leave the flashing lights and the music behind.

I hope Percy and Jason are happy. I hope Lou Ellen and Cecil are happy. I hope Annabeth and Piper are happy. Lou Ellen turns on the radio to fill the silence, and I flip it off angrily. As much as I love Girl in Red, my love life is fruitless. I clutch the steering wheel tighter. I wonder, if I would've said I had a crush on him too, if he hadn't been drunk.

#solangelo #nico di angelo #will solace #fanfiction #lonelyonvalentinesday

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fire-the-headcanons · 4 years

Text

Follow the Beacon Summer—What Happened

[Link to Masterpost]

The school slowly broke down into organized insanity as exams approached. Students worked through meals or fell asleep in the library as teachers gave more and more coursework for review. Teachers encouraged team leaders to make sure their comrades were ready.

Raven was being exactly as cooperative as usual.

"No." She almost growled, pulling the blanket over her head. "It's a stupid assignment. We already learned that."

"Which is why it's called review," Summer argued. "Come on. Our team could be top of our year! Just look over your notes again—"

"Go to sleep."

She raised an eyebrow. "It's only eight."

"Sun's down."

A badly-suppressed noise wafted past her ear, and she turned to scowl at Tai and Qrow. "What are you two snickering at?"

"Oh, nothing." Tai buried his face in his textbook. "What's a Goliath?"

Qrow didn't bother to look up. "Elephant Grimm."

"Oh, charming." He flipped to the index with a scowl. "Come on, Summer, let's just head to the library without her."

She scowled at the simmering lump of blankets. "Nope. We're going to study right here ." The quilt growled, a low rumble with enough snarl to make her hair stand on end. Raven could make a Beowolf jealous, in the right mood.

"Any chance they're smaller than the real thing?"

"Um… no."

"...Common in midwestern Sanus. Why haven't I heard of them?"

"Because they're smart enough to stay away from Vale," Qrow said, holding up his own textbook. A photograph took up most of the page, and the Grimm took up most of the photograph. The unlucky Huntress that had taken the picture had nearly been standing underneath it, and the edges were blurred like they'd been running. As always, the tender spots were identified with thin red arrows. The Goliath had one. Right under its chin, past the trunk. And the tusks. He set the book in his lap, continuing. "They're not very common in Anima, but if you ever see one in the wild, run in the opposite direction."

"No kidding," she muttered, leaning forward to look again. "That thing could flatten a bullhead."

"Size just makes them a bigger target. The real problem is they're one of the weird ones."

A shiver ran down Summer's back at the dark in his tone. "Weird—"

"—ones?" Tai squeaked.

"They can trumpet like regular elephants, except that when you hear it you're struck with paralyzing terror. Big cities use androids to fight 'em, and smaller towns pay the big cities to take care of it if one shows up. If they can afford it."

"...Have you ever seen one?" Summer asked.

A shadow fell over his face. "Once."

Tai swallowed. "...What happened?"

Qrow didn't meet either of their eyes. "People died." With the aura of someone trying to change the subject, he continued on with forced nonchalance. "Its trumpet won't affect you if you're drunk enough, but it makes it kind of hard to fight. …Don't put that on the test."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Summer said, tracing an X over her heart as she copied it down in her notes. Raven pulled her blanket down just enough to give him a scathing glare before disappearing again.

He glanced down at his notes, searching for another way to change the subject. "Uh, the collapse of Vacuo's government, was, um…"

"Well, if you ask some people the Dust companies were behind the whole thing," Tai said, still flipping through pages of tracks to be identified. "But Lionheart's probably looking for something more along the lines of 'Vacuo's people trusted Shade more than their council and it fell apart.'"

Qrow frowned at his notes. "What actually happened?"

"Depends who you ask."

"…But what actually happened?" he asked again, transferring his stare to Tai.

Tai just shrugged.

Qrow sighed, dumping the book back on his desk before getting up to rifle through his closet. "I've been going for hours, I'm gonna take a break. …Raven, where's the shampoo?"

"I used the last of it this morning. Sorry."

"Guess we're going into Vale tomorrow."

Summer leaned back on the hind legs of her chair, biting back a smile as she swiped her shampoo out of the closet. "Here, you can use mine tonight." The cap opened with a soft click and she sniffed at it. "If it's not too flowery."

He took it and gave it a shake. "Are you sure? You're almost out too."

"Yeah, how about I give you some Lien and you can pick mine up for me to pay me back? Tai and I still have to study for our history midterm too, we were going to do the reviews this weekend."

"Yeah, no problem. Thanks."

"Ehh, let's take a break too." He tossed his notes onto the bed and stood up, stretching. "Maybe the dragon will fall asleep while we're gone if we go on a walk."

"Takes one to know one, Xiao Long ."

"Goodnight, Raven," he said in an exaggerated whisper, gesturing for Summer to go through the door before him. Qrow pulled away, headed for the men's room, and Tai turned in the opposite direction.

"Wait, you're serious?" Summer asked as he started toward the stairs. "It's freezing out there."

"Use a little aura," he said, the humor gone from his voice. "We need to talk."

"...W-what…"

Tai shook his head, gesturing for her to follow, and as they stepped into the dark a shiver ran down her back that had nothing to do with the weather. A few flurries caught the light of a lamppost. First snow of the year, in the middle of exams. It figured.

"Qrow asked me not to talk about this," Tai muttered, and Summer snapped back to the moment. He rubbed his eyes. "I just…"

"What?"

"I walked in on him changing the other day…"

"Awkward. ...More awkward since you're telling me about it."

Tai shook his head, still not making eye contact. "That's not it. S… someone cut him."

Summer gritted her teeth. "He's hiding another injury? How low is his aura this ti—"

"No—not injuries. Scars. ...I've never seen anything like it," he mumbled, nausea stealing over his face. "Not in the first aid textbooks. None of the lines were parallel, they couldn't have been made by teeth or claws."

Summer's stomach turned over.

"I can't be sure but they looked recent."

"How recent?" she demanded, surprising herself with her voice's high pitch.

"I don't know. I asked him about it but he won't talk to me. All he said was that Raven didn't do it, but she couldn't know that I knew." His hands tightened on a book Summer hadn't noticed him holding as he held it up to glare at the cover. "...I've been reading about human trafficking."

"You don't think—"

"I don't know." Tai's hand dropped back to his side. "All I know for sure is, wherever they came from, they can't go back."

She nodded, wishing her stomach would untie itself or at least stop moving.

"Just… try to stay close to him, y'know? He's… he's terrified of me. He swears the skirt thing didn't bother him, but I can't think of any other reason for it—"

The knot in her gut tightened painfully. "Oh, fuck."

* * *

"Hey, Summer? Is your hair that color because of your soap?" Qrow asked, holding up the empty shampoo bottle. "City dwellers." He scraped a lock of hair between his nails and completely failed to remove the color. Slightly lighter than hers, now, but a similar deep red. "How the hell can anyone make soap complicated?"

"I put hydrogen peroxide in as a prank," Summer said, forcing a smile and fighting to keep her voice steady.

Comprehension dawned on his face. "Oh!"

"I'll get you some Lien for black dye so you can put it back to normal tomorrow."

"I dunno, I kinda like it," he said, examining his reflection in the mirror on the inside of his closet door. "…And I can spend the next few months telling everyone you're my twin."

"You can have him," Raven said instantly.

Qrow grabbed his pillow and casually tossed it on her face, ignoring the half-hearted squawk of protest. "Whatever. Let's get back to work."

Who could hurt him? He was kind to everyone—even Dan , for gods' sakes, with how unpleasant he'd been.

" ...Hey, this stuff isn't going to stain my pillow, is it?"

"It removes color from your hair, actually."

"Weird."

[A bit rushed, but it exists.]

Next Chapter: Qrow—Kill Me Yourself

#rwby #strq #team strq #summer rose #taiyang xiao long #qrow branwen #raven branwen #dan effuiller #follow the beacon #tw profanity

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therainroguefanfiction · 4 years

Text

🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 031 [Finals Begin!]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,786

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

〈“Some legends are told, some turn to dust or to gold. But you will remember me, remember me for centuries. And just one mistake is all it will take, we’ll go down in history.” Fall Out Boy, “Centuries”〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“Do you see him, kid?” I asked, holding his ankles in my hands.

Riku was sitting on my shoulders so he could look over the crowd. He crossed his arms, resting them on the top of my head. “Nope. There’s Mt. Lady, but my brother isn’t anywhere around. Where is that idiot?”

I hummed, approaching the blonde-haired hero. “Let’s gather some clues.”

“Like Scooby-Doo!” I could hear the smile in his voice and chuckled.

She noticed us approaching and lifted her chin, hand on her hip. “Did you finally come to apologize?”

“Not even on your life,” I deadpanned. “Oi, Riku.”

“Right! Have you see a teenage boy that’s really desperate for your attention?”

If I wasn’t holding his ankles to keep him from falling, I would have facepalmed.

She sweatdropped. “There’s a lot of those, you’re gonna have to be more specific.”

“Umm, well, he’s eighteen-years-old, never had a girlfriend that isn’t an anime character, got rejected from two different colleges, he’s a huge pervert with a large stack of dirty magazines under his bed and his favorite color on a girl is pink! Does that help?”

My eye twitched. Really starting to remember why I don’t fuck with little kids… I cleared my throat. “Maybe start with his name…”

“Yuki Reigen.”

“Okay. Now, what does he look like?”

He hummed thoughtfully. “He’s kinda short for his age and he dyes his hair blonde, but he’s really bad at it so it’s super streaky. He wears blue contacts but his eyes are actually brown like mine! His skin is kinda oily, especially his nose, even though he uses this weird smelling cream. He thinks it works but it doesn’t at all!”

Mt. Lady tilted her head, her finger on her chin. Her face suddenly lit up with recognition. “Oh yeah! He was so desperate for my number, he said he’d do anything for it, it was honestly pathetic. I was just about to tell him he could have it after being my slave for two years, but then he suddenly panicked and ran off.”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” I asked.

“Yeah, you’re a creepy old hag!” Riku added. “My brother will never be a slave to someone as ugly as you!”

“What did you just call me, you brat?!”

“Mt. Lady!” Woodsman came speed-walking up, putting his wooden arm between us before she could advance. “You’re supposed to be patrolling!”

Riku started to shake, his fingers curling around my short hair as he sniffled. “S-She’s so s-scary! She threatened to h-hit me!” His crying alerted the other people around us, who stopped to see what was going on. Hearing his words made a few of them glare at her, clutching their children closer.

The color drained from her face and she hastily tried to explain the situation. “W-What? No, I -”

Woodsman put his hands on his hips, glaring at her. “You made this child cry, now say you’re sorry!”

“But I didn’t -”

Riku started to cry louder.

“O-Okay! I’m sorry, just stop crying!”

His cries died down to soft sniffles. I swear if he gets snot in my fucking hair I’mma rage.

Woodsman turned to us with a sigh. “I’m really sorry about her, she has no filter. You really should be getting back, the finals will be starting soon.”

“I can’t.” I motioned toward the kid shoving his face onto my head. “He can’t find his brother and I’m trying to help find him.”

“Oh, I see. Here, let me take over.” He held his hands out and I bent down so he could gently grab Riku under the arms, lifting him up and over my head before bringing him into his arms. “Don’t worry, I promise I’ll find his brother.”

I nodded, ruffling Riku’s hair. “Don’t leave that idiot brother of yours again, okay? And no more jumping from the stands.”

He nodded, wiping at his wet eyes with the back of his hand. “Thank you, big sis.”

Woodsman nodded his head at me before walking away, Riku leaning over his shoulder. His sad expression morphed to a smug grin, all traces of his tears gone.

I exchanged a look with Mt. Lady and I knew we were thinking the same thing – children are fucking demons.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“Thank you, Cementoss! Hey, sports fans, are you ready?! After all the action you’ve already witnessed, it’s time for the real battle to begin! Can you feel the excitement?! Our competitors are on their own now! Sometimes heroes have only themselves to rely on! Heart, skill, strength, wisdom, courage – they’ll have to use all of these things to rise to the top!”

A bead of sweat rolled down my cheek as I took a deep breath. Why the fuck do I have to go first? Man, there’s gonna be so many fuckers watching me. Just the thought makes me want to die. Maybe I’ll just forfeit…

Strong hands landed on my shoulders. “You’re pretty tense, kid. Nervous?”

I turned around to face Snipe and Toshi. “I’m always tense, it’s a way of life.”

“Don’t worry, young Jen, you’ll do great.” Toshi gave me a thumbs up and a grin. “You fought against young Reggian a bit in the cavalry battle so you know a bit about his quirk already.”

“Somethin’ to do with air, I think?” I scratched my cheek.

“Just don’t kill ’em and you’ll be just fine,” Snipe put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me into a half hug. “We’ll be rootin’ for ya, kid.”

“Thanks, guys.” I grinned.

“Well, well, audience, let’s cut to the good stuff and not delay these finals any longer! Welcome our first fighters – with a potty mouth and an attitude to match, it’s Jen Winchester from the hero course!”

I stepped through the doorway, hands shoved into my pockets. My eyes squinted as the sudden bright light invading my vision. The crowd was screaming, but I did my best not to pay them any mind as I approached the arena.

“Versus! His sanity is seriously up for debate, it’s Regina Reggian from general studies!”

“Hey, I’m lucid sometimes, twatwaffle!”

“What did he just call me?!”

“A twatwaffle.”

“Don’t ever say that again, Eraser…”

I rolled my eyes before glancing across to the other doorway where Regina was exiting from, looking smug. Man, this guy really has a face I just wanna punch. With a fucking metal chair.

“The rules are simple – immobilize your opponent or force them out of the ring! You can also win by getting the other person to cry uncle! Bring on the injuries because we’ve got our very own Recovery Girl waiting on standby! So put your morals aside and don’t be afraid to play dirty, but of course, no life-threatening crap, folks, it’s not allowed! Real heroes use their powers to throw villains in jail, not kill them!”

“I’ll stop anyone that tries to get too rough,” Cementoss said calmly. He was sitting beside the ring, directly centered with it in a chair he had made with his quirk.

I scratched my cheek. Call me old-fashioned but should they really be encouraging teenagers to beat the ever-living shit out of each other? Sounds fucking suspect.

Regina grinned at me. “I’m gonna force you to give up, nerd!”

“Not even in your dreams, kid.” I grinned back. “Be careful, you don’t wanna get burnt.”

“Ready?!”

“You’re a magician’s red burnin’ chicken looking ass.”

“What the fuck does that even mean? Your taste sound like ass. I’m gonna fucking annihilate you like Kunimitsu Tezuka did to the dinosaurs.”

“Nani the fuck?”

“BEGIN!”

We both took our stances. He held his hands out like he were gripping a sword and the air around him started to solidify, forcing the hilt of a sword. The blade started to form… is that a fucking cactus? “Hey! This is my cactus and his name is Pablo!”

I sweatdropped. What is with this guy? “Oi -” I suddenly gagged as something solidified in my mouth. It tasted like if you took Kirishima’s dirty gym socks, wiped your ass with it, and then pureed it with rotten onions. My stomach turned as I spit it out, coughing violently as I tried to ignore the taste on my tongue. Is that… a mother fucking sock?!

“Winchester just spit up a sock! What is this sorcery we’re seeing, folks?!”

“Take this!” Taking advantage of the distracted he had created, he moved in close, swinging the sword above his head. My hand shot up, connecting with the translucent spikes of the cactus. They broke the skin, small drops of blood flowing from the holes.

“Reggian has successfully launched the first attack! How will Winchester respond?!”

“Am I a fucking joke to you?”

“No, you’re a nerd.”

“Hmph, can’t argue with that one, but you’re gonna have to die now, thanks!” I squeezed my hand, increasing the temperature of my skin until the cactus exploded. My hand was throbbing.

“PABLO, NO!!!”

I punched him in the stomach, sending him stumbling backward, clutching his stomach and coughing.

“You’ll pay… for killing Pablo… you thot!” He held his hand up and the air started to solidify. “Improvised special move, Pablo Jr!!” He threw the small, potted cactus at me and I grunted, smacking it away. As soon as my hand touched it, it exploded.

“It’s hard to see but if you look closely you can see a bunch of translucent spikes now stuck in Winchester’s body from that last attack!”

“Son of a bitch,” I grunted. He lifted his hands again and I dashed forward. I won’t even give him the chance to – smack. I fell face-first on the ground, the cold cement seeping through my clothes.

Silence fell over the stadium before a roar of laughter erupted.

“Oh my god!”

“Did you see her face?!”

“I’m so glad I came, this is hilarious!”

“What a classic move!!”

“I’m wheezing, someone help!”

“Ahahahaha! Class 1-A isn’t looking so cool now, is it?!”

“Shut up, Monoma!”

“No one can get past my second improvised special move – Banana Peel Field!!” Regina laughed loudly.

“I can’t believe it! In all my years, this is the first time I’ve ever seen anyone slip on a banana peel during the sports festival! This is great!!”

I slowly lifted my head, my teeth clenched in annoyance. I fucking slipped on a mother fucking banana peel made of goddamn air. This fucking brat is toying with me and it’s pissing me off. I pulled myself to my feet, my blood boiling as flames engulfed my hands. I thrust them out to the side and lines of fire shot out in all directions, swirling around the arena.

I clenched my fists, grinning when he took a step back. “I’m not gonna give you the chance to give up, but don’t worry bro, I will give you the chance to die!” I slammed both fists against the ground, the concrete splitting as fire snaked through it directly toward him.

“Ah, shit -”

The flames shot up from the ground, hitting him in the gut and lifting him off his feet. I teleported behind him, pulling my leg back before slamming my shin against his back and into the cement. He coughed, doing a somersault to avoid my boot. He breathed heavily, lifting his hands again, but I didn’t give him the chance, teleporting behind him again. Pain shot through my skull and I knew I needed to end it soon.

The flames raged on my arm as I cocked my arm, bringing my fist against his face. He flew backward and I stomped my foot, sending a wave of flame to propel him farther. It smacked into him like a spout of water, forcing his body out of bounds and pinning it against the wall. His eyes rolled back in his head as he lost consciousness, the flames dying out. The air spikes in my body disappeared.

“Reggian is out of bounds!” Midnight raised her hand, the metal cuff clanking from the movement. “Winchester advances to the next round!”

“Woah, that chick is kinda scary, don’t you think?”

“She told him to die!”

“That’s not a very heroic thing to say…”

“Reggian did really well!”

“He’s hilarious! Imagine having him as a sidekick.”

“Right? There’d never be a dull moment!”

“His power is pretty unique, too. If you think about it, the uses for his quirk are pretty limitless.”

“Right? Fire’s a pretty basic quirk, no creativity there.”

My eyes narrowed at my hand, watching the blood drip to the cement.

“Go see Recovery Girl.” Midnight ordered.

“Yeah, whateva.”

“And with that explosive display, we have the first victor of the finals! Class 1-A’s Jen Winchester! Ah yeah~ that was a pretty amusing first fight, kids! Both of you fought bravely, let’s show them some love!!”

I won the fucking match, but I feel like a fucking loser. I shoved my hands into my pockets as I approached the dark hallway. I wanna go home.

“Hey, big sis!”

I glanced up at Riku’s voice. He was leaning over the railing again, waving his hand like crazy. A taller boy stood behind him, gripping the back of his shirt to keep him in place. That must be his older brother. Good, I’m glad the Woodsman was able to find him.

“You were so cool out there! Your power is uber strong!” he grinned brightly, closing his eyes. “I wanna be just like you when I grow up!”

My heart skipped a beat as warmth flooded me, my lips twitching up as I released a breath I hadn’t realized I had been holding. Thanks, kid… I needed that.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“Gimme some sugar~” Gran pressed her lips to my cheek and patted my bandaged hand. “There, all better, deary.”

“Thanks, Gran.”

“Why the glum face? You won, after all.”

I sighed, falling back onto the bed and staring up at the ceiling. “I don’t know. I mean, I know I won the fight, but he won over the crowd. They totally hated me.”

She hummed. “There will always be times when people prefer one quirk over another. Don’t let it get you down, deary. You’ll always be number one in my heart.”

I smiled, turning onto my side and propping my cheek up against my palm. “Can I ask you somethin’?”

“Of course you may.”

“What does it mean… to be a hero?”

She sent me a surprised look before humming, her hand on her chin. “Well, everyone views it quite differently. At its very core, a hero is someone that wants to help others, but everyone has their own reasons, their own desires, to become a hero.”

“But I don’t,” I frowned, picking at the white sheet beneath me. “I don’t have that drive. I’ve thought about it a bunch of times, but I can’t think of a reason to fight. Besides… if people find out who my mother is, won’t that make them hate me, anyway? Bakugo told me not to tell anyone. He was dead serious about it. She was an A-Class villain turned pro hero. No one trusted her…”

Gran set her small hand over mine, her voice warm. “That may be true, but you are not your mother, deary. You’re your own person and if they view you differently, well, that’s their loss. No matter what happens in the future, you will always have a place here at U.A.”

My fingers wrapped around her hand. “Do you think… I’ll find a reason to be a hero?”

“I do, but you must remember that you grew up in a world where heroes are nothing more than fiction. It makes sense that you have no desire to be a hero because you grew up believing that such a dream simply wasn’t possible. I believe that, with time, you’ll find your reason to keep fighting. You just have to have some patience. These things can’t be rushed.”

I chuckled. “Patience has never been my strong suit. When I was a kid, the loading screen for my new game was taking too long so I kicked the TV.”

She laughed, patting my hand. “Yes, well, you are still young, deary.”

I glanced at Regina, who was unconscious on the bed across the room. “He gonna be okay?”

“He’ll be just fine. I’ve healed his wounds, now he just needs to recover his stamina. No need to worry.”

“Che, as if I’d worry about that idiot.” I rolled over onto my back, folding my hands behind my head. “Can I rest here for a bit?”

“Of course, deary.”

“Thanks, Gran.”

She pressed a kiss to my cheek before returning to her work, leaving me to mull over her words.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

▸ Forward

📜 Read more by checking out my masterlist 📜

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hehebread · 7 years

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i got tagged by the lovely @missbelgium to do this ask meme. Thank you so much!! this was a nice distraction for the evening! i promise to do the rest very soon.

LAST

1. Drink: just a glass of water

2. Phone call: my dad

3. Text message: “third wheeling intensifies” that or “YOU HAVE ALL MY LOVE”.

4. Song you listened to: Addicted To You by Avicii

5. Time you cried: Monday. you would think it was bc i had to go to work but no. it was “A Dog’s Purpose”. watched it late afternoon. made me cry like a baby.

HAVE YOU

6. Dated someone twice: nah cuz i never dated before.

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: i … dont think so…

8. Been cheated on: nah fam.

9. Lost someone special: yes, i have. more than i’d like to admit. sometimes it was my fault, sometimes it wasnt, but it all hurt the same.

10. Been depressed: i fall in and out of bad episodes. some days are more bearable than others.

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: i dont drink lol.

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS

12-14: uhhh thats a tough one. red and blue are my colors, but purple strikes a chord with me too.

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

15. Made new friends: yesss, many!! here and irl.

16. Fallen out of love: hhhh in a way i did. not with people but with ideas, concepts, and dreams.

17. Laughed until you cried: ye s tahnk god

18. Found out someone was talking about you: um yeah for sure, but its nothing im not used. it happens y’know.

19. Met someone who changed you: i did actually. in the most subtle and discreet way. the thing is, i got close to so many people in the past year and just started picking up on their little quirks and mannerisms. and suddenly im swearing in spanish. puta madre i outta be ashamed

20. Found out who your friends are: sadly yah. wasnt too thrilled.

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: my parents?????

GENERAL

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them. thats why i semi-ditched fb.

23. Do you have any pets: YESS!! three chickens and a rooster. two lovebirds. we used to have an african gray but we gave it away to grandma to keep her company. we also have this rat who’d been living in our garage for a while now. dunno if that counts.

24. Do you want to change your name: i kinda do. but i feel like i got too attached to it at this point.

25. What did you do for your last birthday: a few of my lovely flatmates and I went out for crepes. got many happy birthday wishes that day. I was on my own most of it but thats okay.

26. What time did you wake up: fucking 5:52am.

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: probably not sleeping. why u ask?

28. Name something you can’t wait for: …………………………………. havent looked forward to anything in a very long time. maybe deadpool. no clue.

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: a few hours ago.

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: if i could, i’d give myself a better childhood.

31. What are you listening to right now: Home We’ll Go by Walk off the Earth

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: probably. my memory is shit at remembering stuff like that tho.

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: some of my colleagues utter inability to communicate their feelings or concerns. my utter inability to communicate my feelings or concerns.

RANDOM INFO ABOUT YOURSELF

35. Mole/s: two on my right palm. one on my left palm. another on the back of my neck. one higher in my forehead, and two others in places that shall not be named.

36. Mark/s: stretch marks around my thighs.

37. Childhood dream: a younger (and much happier) version of me wanted to become a neurosurgeon or a heart surgeon. idk about that anymore tho.

38. Hair color: ver y dark black.

39. Long or short hair: pretty long. down to my lower back. two years ago it used to not reach down to my chin. i keep changing my hair style quite a lot.

40. Do you have a crush on someone: uuhhh yeah kinda but im hopeless everything is hopeless.

41. What do you like about yourself: umm tough one. my perseverance, probably.

42. Piercings: two in one ear and one in the other. might get more.

43. Blood type: O+

44. Nickname: Raz is actually my nickname, or rather, the english equivalent of it.

45. Relationship status: orders meal for two to have leftovers for later.

46. Zodiac: Aries

47. Pronouns: she/her or they/them but really it doesnt matter to me that much. anything goes.

48. Favorite TV Show: is this a good place to say i love drake&josh

49. Tattoos: nada

50. Right or left hand: right-handed

51. Surgery: on my gums. 5 yrs ago.

52. Hair dyed in different color: i used to dye it with henna.

53. Sport: track & field all the way. i dont do it anymore but id love to.

55. Vacation: yesss i love vacations. would love to travel around some more.

56. Pair of trainers: sketchers.

MORE GENERAL

57. Eating: nothin. i should go get some melon.

58. Drinking: water

59. I’m about to: go get melons. or go out for dinner in like two hours.

61. Waiting for: a sense of purpose or fulfillment in life… that or my fave author to update.

62. Want: my sister’s blueberry muffins.

63. Get married: maybe platonically but otherwise nah.

64. Career: im hoping to become a doctor. hoping.

WHICH IS BETTER

65. Hugs or kisses: HUGS. ALL KINDS OF THEM. but cheek/head/forehead kisses are also very very pleasant.

66. Lips or eyes: …eyes.

67. Shorter or taller: shorter. i dont like looking up.

68. Older or younger: than who?? than what??

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: nice muscular arms. on ladies. yes.

71. Sensitive or loud: loud for sure. i love people with energy.

72. Hook up or relationship: umm neither? but if i hadta choose then a relationship.

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker. life’s too short.

HAVE YOU EVER

74. Kissed a stranger: as a greeting. yes.

75. Drank hard liquor: oh, no.

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: to this day, no I have not, thank goodness.

77. Turned someone down: admittedly, yes.

78. Broken someone’s heart: i sure hope not.

79. Had your heart broken: yea </3

80. Been arrested: heavens no. not yet.

81. Cried when someone died: yes

82. Fallen for a friend: ……………………………………………..yea

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

83. Yourself: i try. i really do.

84. Miracles: ofc

85. Love at first sight: not really. that just doesnt happen. love needs time, patience, and hard work.

86. Santa Claus: hahaha nooooo. i dont celebrate the holidays.

87. Kiss on the first date: shrugs

OTHER:

89. Eye colour: dark brown

90. Favorite movie: for a very very long time, it was shrek, but then the memes happened so

I tag @wandschrankheld @awkwardslytherin and @snark-sniper and @of-pasta-and-potatoes. you guys dont have to do it ofc. but if you do, pls tage me!! i’d love to see it.

#i started this in two weeks ago and just now got around finishing it #im so ashamed #tage meme #long post

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mismatched-ideas · 7 years

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Tagged by the ever lovely @definitelynotadulting

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Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people. (I don’t have that many friends)

LAST… Drink: coffee Phone call: Mom Text message: Depending on what message app either a link or “we had some tstorms tonight but there might be some tomorrow” Song you listened to: Jack Campbell, Absentee Time you cried: Two days ago, having finally caught up to TAZ and boy did the end of lost century kill me HAVE YOU… Dated someone twice: Nope Kissed someone and regretted it: Not really Been cheated on: No Lost someone special: No Been depressed: Pft, just a tad bit Gotten drunk and thrown up: hahahaha, yep Made new friends: Lol yes Fallen out of love: Yes? I’m not sure I was ever in love so it’s hard to say. Laughed until you cried: Constantly Found out someone was talking about you: Yah, my mom to my sister b/c my parents don’t realize that when they talk to their kids about their other kids, we tell each other. Met someone who changed you: Yessssss (Susan/Alison/Caroline y’all are at the top of the list) Found out who your friends are: I guess? Kissed someone from your Facebook list: Lol no because we were dating and he never fucking took the time to friend me back on FB. I KNOW YOU DON’T USE IT BUT BRO. Kissed a stranger: Almost but no Drank hard liquor: Haha I started with hard liquor then realized I needed to be an adult and stopped doing that Lost glasses/contact lenses: I don’t think so but I’m not sure. Defs not glasses but contacts are so disposable. Turned someone down: Yeppppppp. It was also pretty bad cause I just like shouted NO! then stared at them because I’m an awkward muffin. Sex on the first date: No but tbh I’ve been only like probably less than 10 dates Broken someone’s heart: Maybe? Probably. But I was 18 and he was my brother’s age and like it was kinda weird. Had your heart broken: Lol yah but it was none of their faults Been arrested: No but my mom is convinced I will be at a protest Cried when someone died: no. I don’t... I’m one of those people who doesn’t cry for things like that, I don’t know why. Fallen for a friend: Yep, about 3/4 of my crushes from elementary school until now have been friends Kissed on the first date: Nah.

GENERAL List 3 favorite colors: Blue, red, black How many Facebook friends do you know in real life: All of them? I onlt friend people on FB I know irl because like I have 2 non-IRL friends cause, again, awkward muffin. Do you have any pets: I wish Do you want to change your name: Maybe? I havent’ decided... What time did you wake up: if my body hates me 6a if not 10a What were you watching at midnight last night: I was listening to music and writing so not watching anything Name something you can’t wait for: To start my new job in Nov When was the last time you saw your mum: Last Saturday What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: the face that I’ll have to be hella in the closet at my new job What are you listening to right now: AJJ, Children of God [music] Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Maybe? I think so... Oh, yah! My friend has a friend named Tom who I was trying to tell whether he was hitting on me or not when we met. Something that is getting on your nerves right now: Living with my parents Most visited website: AO3 or tumblr. Mole/s: No Mark/s: Some scars, but only a few small ones Childhood dream: I had a new dream every day I swear. Singer, artist (ha), writer, cool person who’s mentally stable and knows 5 languages. Oh, no, that’s my current dream. Do you have a crush on someone: Boy, howdy yes and it hurts. What do you like about yourself: The fact that I don’t get annoyed by small things [most of the time] Piercings: Just one in each ear, like the straight-laced person I am Blood type: Fuck, I know this. Nope, can’t remember. Nickname: I’ve got a lot. KEV, Katie, Captain Eitak Relationship status: Very single Zodiac: scorpio Pronouns: they/them Favorite TV show: Yuri on Ice because let’s be honest, that show changed my life Tattoos: None but maybe in the future Right or left hand: right Surgery: wisdom teeth Hair dyed in different color: For a while, it was dyed red but now I just dye it brown. Pair of trainers: gray and green. Very comfy. [Trainers are sneakers right?] Current and all-time best friend name: No! I can’t choose!!! I’ve got lots of best friends okay? There are at least 10 people who I’d call my best friends and I’d really say the number is more 13. Eye color: Blue Favorite movie: Urgh, I’m bad at favs... Mad Max: Fury Road, I think.

WHICH IS BETTER? Hugs or kisses: Hugs Lips or eyes: Eyes Shorter or taller: don’t really care Nice arms or stomach: arms Sensitive or loud: Neither? Hook up or relationship: for me? relationship. In general? don’t care. Troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant, I guess????

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… Yourself: Eh, debatable. Miracles: Not really Love at first sight: I believe in lust or infatuation at first sight. Santa Claus: I’m not convinced I ever believe in Santa. No joke, as a kid I was like “We don’t have a chimney and I refuse to believe in a man who breaks into my house even if he’s giving me gifts.” and people were surprised when I didn’t believe in god...

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I tag, hmmmmmmmmmm... @izzybee92 @zireale @scyleste @thoroughlymoderntheatrenerd @yuuriandviktorr and anyone else??????? I don’t know people ;__; and if I didn’t tag you it’s probably because I always second guess whether people really want to be tagged in stuff....

#questions #about me #text #long post

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skittles-pixie · 7 years

Text

85 statements

R U L E S : you must answer these eighty five statements and tag twenty people

I was tagged by the always wonderful @essentiallychaotic

I would like to tag: dude idk if I know 20 people to tag but ill try... if I tag you and you don't want me to please tell me @iridescentautistic @mybloodyplacemats @wanderer-and-muse @standswithpotatos @alaskanomad @melodychanges @happydance416 uuuuuuh idk that's 7? lol @everyone that works right?

Part 1: the last:

drink: Twist up its a lemon lime soda... idk I asked my boy for a drink and that's what he brought me

phone call: My mother she woke me up two days ago

text message: to me- my mother.... from me- my coworker

song you listened to: Brittany spears toxic started playing on the radio when I got home from work

time you cried: Last night... combination of hormones and touchy feely movie... hormones suck...

Part 2: Ever:

dated someone twice: uh ive been on more than one date with my boy... otherwise my dating history is a little unclear... several guys who acted like we were dating and then refused to actually call it a date... so yeah idk...

kissed someone and regretted it: ooooooooh yeah..... alcohol is bad for you kids......

been cheated on: nope... ive only been in the one relationship and I have a very loyal boy

lost someone special: yes... both in passing away and by loosing touch....

been depressed: been? as in passed tense... lol try still depressed... ive learned how to handle it though, and it helps to have an outlet that's not controlled by my mother, and people who care about me. and to not be told how terrible I am every 5 minutes.

gotten drunk and thrown up: I had a crazy 21st birthday.... after that I try not to get that drunk... but it happens on occasion... lol

Part 3: Favourite colours: ALL OF THEM!!! I really like colors.. though green, blue, and blood red are prolly my top colors...

Part 4: In the last year have you:

made new friends: yes.... more like my boy made friends and introduced me, but yeah I always meet new people

fallen out of love: Naw I love my boy too much

laughed until you cried: yeeeeah.... I laugh a lot lol....

found out someone was talking about you: yeah apparently people talk about me a lot “oh yeah I know who you are” is a phrase I hear a lot when meeting people... also I guess my boy talks about me? but from what I hear people usually say good things

met someone who changed you: yeah ive spent some time getting to know myself better

found out who your friends are: yeah.... and in the process ive lost almost all of them, but I'm done trying too hard to get people to like me. I want to be invited out not just kinda sorta included but only if somebody else takes me. So yeah... long story short I found out that my friends are simply not....lol... I do still have the good ones though....

kissed someone on your facebook list: don't have facebook.... if I did it would prolly be yes though lol....

Part 5: General:

how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: yeah still don't have facebook

do you have any pets: Theyre not really mine, but I live with 2 doggos

do you want to change your name: when I was little I wanted to change my name... I wanted something more pretty like rose or diamond.... but now I'm pretty happy with my name... would only change my last name if the occasion called for it....

what did you do for your last birthday: If I remember right I went to my physics class and then chilled in the empty cabin.... my boys aunt and uncle were visiting from Germany and got me a cake and a couple of presents... but on the actual day of my birthday I was pretty much alone... but birthdays are gross anyway

what time did you wake up: 1 pm lol... I'm too much of a night owl

what were you doing at midnight last night: I was finishing my movie and playing with my phone... I wanted to snap about how the sunlight in Alaska makes fireworks a bummer for the 4th, but I was too lazy lol

name something you can’t wait for: not having schoolwork.... I'm so glad to be done.....

when was the last time you saw your mom: may when she came up for my graduation... it wasn't too bad... she only put me down once....

what are you listening to right now: bobs burgers.... my boys watching it

have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yes.... I have a friend named tom.... we don't talk very often... but hes still my friend....

something that is getting on your nerves: my one coworker.... he pisses me off...

most visited website: tumblr.... or Netflix....

hair colour: blonde... which is kinda an ombre cause I dye it lighter and then let it grow out and then repeat so its always lightest on the bottem lol... though I'm trying to let it grow out for a bit...

do you have a crush on someone: my booooooooooooy (please read that in a super cheasy sappy sarcastic tone)

what do you like about yourself: that's a tough question... lol... But I like my ability to be stubborn... It helps me work hard to get what I want and be a better person.... and I get to prove people wrong which is great because so many people have told me that I would never really succeed because the odds were too stacked against me...

piercings: don't have any... have considered earings.. but nah....

blood type: yeah... no idea

nickname: cece ce Cebu skittles pixie.....

relationship status: dating and hopeful for the future cause this is a very good one...

zodiac: leo

pronouns: She/Her

favourite tv show: Gilmore Girls, buffy, charmed, x files.... idk I watch a lot of shows...

tattoos: I absolutely love them... but my fear of needles and my indecisiveness mean that I don't have any nor any plans to get one... but I love henna...

right or left handed: right handed when it comes to writing... but ambidextrous for just about anything else...

piercing: no.

sport: uuuuh I don't follow any major teams or anything... but I'm always down to watch baseball, basketball, hockey, or soccer... ill gladly play any sport but I'm sorely out of shape lol and I don't always know all the rules... football still confuses me...

vacation: everywhere lol.... but right now Germany, Ireland, las vagas, japan, or just taking time off to travel around Europe in general, are all at the top of my list.....

pair of trainers: ????? idk????

Part 6: more general :

eating: Most food is good... I will prolly die if you ever feed me spicy food tho

. drinking: water, iced tea, hot tea, coffee, some soda but not very much or very often, milk, alcohol...

I’m about to: prolly go to bed so I don't die working the morning shift tomorrow

waiting for: it to be dark at night again lol...

want: my degree, a job that utilizes that degree, my own place.

get married: one day. ive got some time before anything happens... but I found my person....

career: Chemistry.... in Alaska.... man I'm still piecing that one together.... but environmental chemistry is super cool... and id love to work with the Alaskan environment, to keep it safe and clean and to better understand how it works

hugs or kisses: both... but mainly hugs... I'm a very touch oriented person....

lips or eyes: lips... idk why cause I love eyes too... but I'm fascinated with how peoples lips look.... like I never understood those superhero masks that just cover their eyes because I always recognize people by their lips and how they talk

shorter or taller: taller....... when I'm around tall people I feel smaller and that makes me happy... plus like.. they can reach the shit that I cant lol...

older or younger: I'm sooo old...... not really but sometimes I feel like it so idk lol

nice arms or nice stomach: arms... always.... especially shoulders...

hook up or relationship: uh before my current relationship I was totally all for either though I focused mainly on hook ups... but now I'm content with the relationship thing....

troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker... definitely... but usually its a good thing.... I never much cared for rules...

kissed a stranger: oh yeah... many times...

drank hard liquor: yup... do it a lot... but life in Alaska....

lost glasses or contact lenses: forgot where I put them a few times... but always found them... break glasses a lot tho....

turned someone down: yeeeeah... guys usually don't respond well... I know... big surprise...

sex on the first date: yup... i love sex....

broken someone’s heart: yeah.... it was terrifying... i vaguely knew him through mutual friends and similar activities... he asked to be my valentine when id told him that id never had one before ... valentines was about two weeks away... we saw each other for like a week... he had my entire future planned out for me... and i couldn't get passed the fact that he was 14 years older than me.... when i told him things weren't gonna work he broke down bawling.... and our mutual friends told me how bad he was after the conversation....

had your heart broken: yeah... and then toyed with... it was fuuuuuun.......

been arrested: no I'm an good kid who can do nothing wrong... and anytime ive done anything illegal i was always with people who took all the attention off of me....

cried when someone died: yeah... ive known too many people that have died....

fallen for a friend: yup... it didn't work out

Part 7: do you believe in:

yourself: Its a work in progress lol.

miracles: yes. This world is not always as terrible as the people who inhabit it...

love at first sight: you know... i never used to believe in it... but then i met my boy and i swear to god it was like i saw the puzzle pieces of my life fall into place around me... we were pretty drunk but to this day i still cant explain why i had such a strong urge to meet this man. why i insisted that he had to play pool with us... we already had more than enough people to play... but he had to be there with us.... and from that moment on my life has just gotten better and better....

Santa Claus: I guess... more like i believe that once upon a time he exsisted....

kiss on the first date: yes... again I'm a very touch oriented person....

angels: I think theres a lot of things out there that we do not understand and we are not ment to... so yeah i think angels exist...

Part 8: Other:

current best friend’s name:

Mckenzi is my go to... but Daniel is also my best friend.... I have a few others too like maddi... but if i named everyone then id be naming like all my friends and that would make me sad because I'm too social to have such a small social group lol....

eye colour: blue....

Favourite movie: depends on my mood... but i can never really pick a favorite...

#personal #tagged #oh god this is long #lol #enjoy #long post

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writing-wyns · 7 years

Text

seven years

I had an idea, and then I did the idea. And then it spiraled out of control.

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!!!! Here’s some pointless fluff featuring your fave boys except they’re like almost 30 years old and still gross as ever.

Enjoy!

AO3

Bokuto swears that there is something definitely up about sci-fi movies. Not a bad something, but it whooshes around in his stomach, making it twist and knot and he wants the feeling gone. It’s makes him wiggle in his spot on the couch like he’s got a bad case of the ants in the pants and for all he knows, maybe he does. He’s happy, for sure, he’s happy because Kuroo is there, sitting on his feet like he always does and looks damn good in their home: the lights from the TV are soft on his form, contrasting the nightfall shadows, it highlights his angled nose and dyes his already dark hair with shades of pink and red.

His hands are clammy and he touches his fingers to the palms before wiping them on his tshirt with a look of mild disgust. It’s not a bad feeling he has, he knows this for a fact, but he’s positive his stomach just folded in on itself, and that is definitely not good. It’s when he wiggles his toes, where they’re wedged under Kuroo’s ass does he realize just what in the hell is up.

“What are you smiling for?” Kuroo asks, looking at him now. His eyes are squinted because of how dark it is, but the TV flashes onto his face for a quick second and all Bokuto can see is pure joy.

“I’m not smiling,” Bokuto says, but he knows it’s a lie as soon as he says it because his cheeks burn, like he’s been smiling all this time, and - holy hell - he has been.

Kuroo is smiling too now, it grows slowly, creeping up on his face like the morning’s sunrise. “Yes you are,” he singsongs.

He’s giggling -giggling of all things - like a fucking school girl, and he throws his head back on the armrest of the couch, slaps his hands over his face as a cover, and mumbles out around a laugh, “I am definitely not smiling.”

“You are clearly smiling you goober,” Kuroo’s laughing too now. Bokuto’s thinks they’ve caught some weird new disease. Where the symptoms include: spontaneous smiling, random outbursts of laughing, and in severe cases - like himself - not being able to look your boyfriend in the eye. “C’mon Kou, spill the beans,” Kuroo says, his hands are on Bokuto’s knees now and he’s shaking them, as if he could shake an answer right out of him.

“I’m not telling.” His cheeks ache now, and he’s one hundred percent positive that if you looked up ‘face splitting grin’ in the dictionary it would be a picture of him at that exact moment.

Bokuto can feel Kuroo crawl up his body, laying on top of him til they’re face to face, the only thing blocking them from looking at each other is the permanent fixture of his hands on his own face.

“I can’t believe you’re really gonna leave me hanging like this,” Kuroo says to his hands. Bokuto can feel him tug at his wrists and he presses his fingers to his face in resistance. “It can’t be that bad can it?”

Bokuto wants to scream. His heart is in his stomach, or maybe his stomach is at maximum whoosh, maybe his whole entire organ system has exploded, or - or something. “It really is that bad,” he mutters into his hands, “It is so so bad.”

“Like on a scale of one to ten, how bad is it?”

“Thirteen.”

Kuroo is laughing so hard at the admission that Bokuto can barely make out the “oh my god” he manages to choke out. It’s a pretty opportune time to sneak a peek at the man above him, Bokuto thinks, but dear god was he wrong,; because Kuroo’s face is bright and grinning, beaming that lopsided grin he does when he just can’t help himself. Where his eyes crinkle at the ends, and his teeth show, and his nose scrunches up ever so slightly; and Bokuto doesn’t know what the fuck his organs are doing, but it is so goddamn painful that all he can do is let out the weakest of groans as he slides his body even further across the armrest and off the couch.

Kuroo slides down his body with the movement, his chin coming to a rest on Bokuto’s chest, nothing but amusement in his voice when he asks, “What now?”

Bokuto huffs out a breath, his hands haven’t left his face for a single moment, and presses his fingers even harder to his skin, desperately trying to hide that stupid smile that just won’t go away. “You promise you won’t laugh?”

“I will not make a single sound,” Kuroo promises.

“Okay?” Bokuto breathes out the question to himself, and he hears Kuroo echo the word. He takes in a deep breath, filling his lungs, lets it go all in one breath, and says, “I like you so much, like a whole lot, and I am physically dying.”

There’s one whole second of silence til Bokuto tentatively moves his hands away from his face and chances a look at Kuroo, his hand flying back up immediately at the sight.

“You said you wouldn’t laugh!”

Kuroo’s lips are pressed so thin, mouth twisted off to the side, that he can barely manage an, “I’m not!” without completely losing it.

“You’re smiling,” Bokuto accuses.

Kuroo takes a deep breath, a sad attempt to smother the bubbles of laughter that are threatening to escape. “You didn’t say I couldn’t smile.”

Another pained groan makes its way out, and Bokuto’s face is so flushed and red he doesn’t think he’ll ever return to his normal state. “I can hear you laughing you know,” if Kuroo wasn’t laying on top of him, Bokuto would have kicked him. Off the couch, preferably.

“We’re already dating,” Kuroo can barely talk he’s laughing so hard, “for years!”

“I knoooooow,” he says dragging the word out like it hurts.

“I can not believe I am being confessed to seven years into a relationship,” Bokuto interjects with a ‘shut up’ but it doesn’t look like Kuroo wants to let this one go anytime soon. “And you’re embarrassed? Gotta admit it, that’s my favorite part.”

“I take it back, I don’t like you at all. You’re the worst.”

Kuroo wiggles back up, like a giggling little snake on a mission, til he’s right in Bokuto’s face, all smug smiles. “Seven years, and you ‘like’ me? Honestly Kou, I’m a little insulted.”

Bokuto lets his head fall back against the armrest, muttering “when will you stop?” under his breath, Kuroo ignoring his obvious suffering all the while.

“I mean, you’d think after seven fucking years, someone would be, oh I don’t know, in love? Is that what you meant? Don’t tell me you were too embarrassed to tell me you love me? I won’t judge you, ya know, I’m pretty irresistible.”

“That’s it!” And Bokuto is slapping a hand over his mouth because obviously Kuroo does not know how to shut up on his own. “What can I do to make you drop this?”

Kuroo pries the hand off his face, fixing Bokuto with a look that speaks trouble.

“Say it,” Kuroo demands, like he’s got Bokuto right where he wants him.

“Say what?

“Tell me you love me and I won’t mention any of this.”

Bokuto is trying his best to glare at him but he must be doing an awful job because the smile that was already on Kuroo’s face only grows bigger. He slaps a hand over his lips again, but he can feel the upward tilt of his lips in that signature grin of his, and if that wasn’t already enough, Kuroo had taken to wiggling his eyebrows. And it is both the worst and the cutest thing Bokuto has ever witnessed in his life.

I’m a goner, Bokuto thinks. He has died and gone to heaven because of this man, he’s been resurrected and only to die again because of him and he’ll do it a thousand times over. It’s something he knows for a fact, something that is indisputable, and it grinds his weak, fragile heart into a pulp. A small little pulp because the world’s biggest idiot is lying on top of him with a smile that has reached his eyes, a pulp because it’s been seven goddamn years and he’s still not over it.

And he never will be.

“Kuroo Tetsurou,” he moves the hand from Kuroo’s mouth to his cheek, cupping it gently, thumb stroking in small circles. There is nothing special about the way Kuroo looks in that moment, there’s a day old beard on his jaw, his age has long since started to show, and he’s wearing that same old ratty tshirt from college, and yet - Bokuto is positively melting at the sight. “Kuroo Tetsurou, I am positively and absolutely head over heels and disgustingly in love with you.”

“Disgustingly?” Kuroo asks, his own personal way of trying to keep cool.

“Disgustingly.” He affirms, and Kuroo is nuzzling his cheek into his hand at the word.

The happiest little sound filters out of him, bubbling over til it fills the entire room. Its contagious and Bokuto can’t stop himself from laughing too. “Lucky for you,” he says, scooching closer and closer, their eyes crossing, “I too am positively and absolutely head over heels and disgustingly in love with you.”

They’re giggling way too much to kiss properly, like a couple still stuck in their honeymoon phase, and maybe they are. Maybe they never learned how not to be in the honeymoon phase, still caught up in the whirlwind of crushes turned first dates and tentative kisses on their parent’s doorstep.

It’s been seven years, still stuck in their honeymoon phase, and Kuroo is smiling way too much when he tries to kiss him, his lips instead finding the bridge of Bokuto’s nose and it only makes them laugh even more. He is content and pleased and thrumming like he’s on cloud nine itself with Kuroo peppering kisses all over his face, their laughter never coming to an end.

“Seven years?” He says, kissing Bokuto on the cheek and snorting.

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” And Bokuto is squealing, pushing his face away but it’s been long seven years and he couldn’t be any happier if he tried.

#bokuro #bokuroo #Bokuto Koutarou #Kuroo Tetsurou #haikyuu!!#this is a queued post I'll still be in class when this thing posts #I honestly wasn't supposed to write this at all I have writing deadlines coming up but I shitted this out for vday so pls take it

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