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#Im just happy I finally found out this for me so I can actually get work done!
subarashiihibi · 2 days
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEAUTIFUL ANGEL WIFE IZAYA ORIHARA!!!!!!! 🥰😘👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨😭😎🔥🫶🩷
i can't quite put into words what exactly izaya has meant to me over the past 8 years. one, it sounds really corny and i go off into at least 30 different tangents about all the little things that make him so endearing to me, but also i just dont really know how to sound eloquent and stuff. that being said, a lot of the person i am today is (for better or for worse) thanks to izaya, so i think if i leave it at that you can at least get it a little bit. ^_^
i was really excited to set this year's display up. i changed the room i used this time, since i got a new desk, and it was...kind of a challenge at first, but after moving around a bunch of furniture and whatnot, i made it work...!
i had to forego putting up a few other things... namely the rest of my bromides and postcards, but also all my shikishi. i need to invest in some way to display them... i also had two(!!) dakimakura... i had to leave out this year. </3 and the cardboard cutout i made when i was 16. 😭
as usual, i have a lot of stuff to say about this entire thing and the stuff around it, so i... will leave my rambling under the cut. (^□^)
my god putting this thing together was hell. i said 'challenge' earlier no this shit was like a fucking war omfg. the clear files kept falling i was miserable and praying to god (im not even religious). and then i had to tape behind the big izaya balloon poster cause it's covering my doorway and it kept getting pulled back to the door...? and it looked stupid. 🤦‍♂️ i wasn't originally gonna put the tables in here either. i really wanted to be able to fit the bed sheets on the walls. but i couldn't... and i needed more room to put the pillows and stuff, so it ended up working out perfectly.
(the only reason i didn't want to use tables was cause i didn't want something covering up izaya's sexy exposed feet in the china poster... 😟)
i was (finally) gonna get a cake this year, but after having the stress of two exams back to back this week and exams next week, i...was too exhausted lol. hopefully next year i won't have an awful overnight job or school making me miserable. (as if i'm not still gonna be a student next year☠)
the amount of durarara merch that's come out the past few years has left me feeling so spoiled... i hope they do a mail order for the 20th anni merch... i want all the izaya stuff without the crazy markups from resellers online🤬
also plz don't judge my toploader deco skills too much... i am not very experienced... and i also don't have a lot of stickers to work with... 🥺
at any rate... at this exact time last year, i was suffering inside the confines of my local walmart... i was working overnight, and my break was at 12am, so as soon as it hit, i ran out to my car to excitedly celebrate the date changing to may 4th...!
and then during my lunch break, i drove to the whataburger next door and did another 10-pull on the izaya birthday kuji while in the drivethru.
i didn't realize this until i started taking stuff down in my room (this is my bedroom... i can't realistically keep two large tables in here and a poster covering my doorway. i had to crawl under the table just to get in and out. my knees still hurt.), but... i actually forgot something i wanted to include... my izaya lightstick... 💔💔💔 it's okay. i will live. i'm happy with my setup as a whole so i have no qualms with this. i just need to make sure i don't make the same mistake next year.
on a (slightly) unrelated note, yesterday (may 3) was the 19th birthday of my favorite album ever from my favorite band ever, fall out boy's from under the cork tree! i was so happy when i found out it's right before izaya's birthday cause fall out boy as a whole has so many izaya coded lyrics it's crazy. (btw, their debut album tttyg came out on the 6th as well...!)
and then tomorrow is cinco de mayo... it's not a coincidence... latina izaya truthers rise up...
anyways...! i'm finally learning how to draw properly. the reason i was always so miserable when i tried before was cause i never knew what i was doing. i didn't know where to start from. because...i didn't use references...so hopefully i can draw something cute for izaya's birthday next year. ^_^
that's all i have to say...! i woke up early this (yesterday) morning at 9am so i could be there at 10am when midnight hit in japan, and it's already 3am on the 4th, so i'm exhausted lol...
i was so excited seeing all the izaya bday fanart on twitter though. all the beautiful artists making beautiful art...
but i've spoken too much now. sorry. i'm going to spend the rest of my night listening to fall out boy before i eventually pass out. bye bye !!!! ^_^
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swarmfly · 1 year
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I finally caught one of the livestreams last night (I'm in Canada so it's at like ass o'clock in the morning for me) and it made me so fuckin happy. Every time I catch clips of them on stage I'm reminded of just how much MCR means to me. I've carried them with me for over half of my life, their art has impacted me in ways I can't fully explain. I'm just so greatful to be here and to be alive to experience this alongside so many people who feel the same.
I just took my meds and also had coffee so It's Real Kvelling Hours™️ over here so ignore me if you find this sappy shit boring-
I used to get so embarrassed about saying shit like "This band saved my life" because I was scared of sounding cringey or obsessive, but they really did and I'm so fucking thankful. They helped me save myself, this community helped me save myself, and thanks to that I'm living a life I could have never imagined.
I remember being 12 years old, making my first emo little tumblr account and finding the MCR community. My friends and I making matching URLs and blog themes, sharing memes and making edits and just having so much fun. Throughout all the terrible, scary times I've been able to come back here and have a safe place to just engage in my special interest and find some peace. I might have grown apart from those friends, but this community has always felt like home to me so I don't exactly feel alone in it.
It's because of this community, as well as MCR's loud acceptance, support and welcoming of queer people that I've really learned how to be proud and unashamed of my queer identity. When I was in situations where I wasn't being accepted or treated fairly, it made that shit hurt far less knowing that there were so many good people out there like me, and that would support me. Now with all the scary shit going on in the world it's been really comforting to know that I still have this to turn to.
So basically thank you MCR for making art that's shaped me in ways I hold so close to my heart and will forever, Thank you MCR Community for existing alongside me and sharing this beautiful experience, we might not be perfect but I've felt safer here than I have any other fan space, and thank you Autism Brain for slapping me in the face repeatedly with this special interest for over a decade without a moment's rest you're the real MVP.
#lmao sorry for the ramble im just euphoric about being alive right now and after i caught the stream i was like#this is why#i really didnt intend to live this long but im extremely greatful that i did because after years and years of back to back trauma#and painful recovery#im finally living the best life i ever had#im about to go pick up my girlfriend who is the best partner ive ever had and also one of my best friends#yesterday i made a handful of new friends and connections at shul and ive found a wonderful jewish community in this city#ive made friends with someone who went through the same trauma as me at the hands of the same person and have found support and validation#as well as a really good friendship there#my friends are getting married and having kids and making beautiful art and sharing it with me#im making beautiful art and sharing it with my friends#ive also found a home in the local punk community and have been going to shows at sketchy little dive bars and basements and backyards#or just in parks downtown#im getting the surgeries i want for my transition and health and ive got a great medical team behind me and a new therapist and meds#that actually work for me#also my cat has just been such a clingy happy baby lately and is just the Sweetest little guy#life is good life is so fucking good and im so glad i decided to stay alive#if you needed a sign to stay alive this is it please#life can be so scary and awful and traumatic but there are beautiful things out there i promise#and sometimes they take a while and some effort to reach but its so fucking worth the wait and the work it takes to get here#community has played a huge part in that for me#humans can be really beautiful when they're loving and kind to others#anyway if you read all this congratulations we're best friends now thanks for watchinf me dissect my brain u can take some of it#and put it in a jar with some isopropyl alcohol :)
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von-karmas-a-bitch · 7 months
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you’ve got this!!
girl help i have no context ghskfhskbf thanks for whatever it is you're trying to pep talk me abt
#if i had to guess it's probably abt me rambling in the tags abt how i've been stuck in a mental illness tar pit#that caused me to run out of meds and subsequently get worse and ghost my found family grandparents for like 5 months fhsjhfjsgf#i am indeed on the verge of breaking my failgirl streak so i do got this you're right anon#the plan is to go to the farm and apologise for my disappearing act tomorrow around noon#since i feel like i can finally start volunteering consistently now bc im this close 👌 to getting back on top of shit#i actually did so much today im proud of myself#deep cleaned the degus' cages and gave them fresh bedding and they are very happy now bc making their nests is like their fave activity#especially sam he would honestly rather you give him a piece of toilet paper than a treat one man's trash truly is another man's treasure#and i took my laundry down (will put it away after I've done the other stuff i need to do) and hung my sister's up for her#(she batch cooked a bunch of meals for us and also does the bulk of housework as well as work work bc my ass is unemployed so like#it's older sibling reparations yknow. i gotta do stuff for her sometimes to lighten the load a bit lmao)#and i helped her take the bins out#and bc i have been living in my pajamas for an embarrassingly long while i have no more laundry to do aside from my bedsheets#which i am just abt to change#and THEN im gonna put my laundry away and answer that other ask#then im gonna be all caught up on Stuff I Need To Do and then volunteering at the farm will be the only thing i have to do#which will thus make it doable bc it won't make me too exhausted to do other stuff bc there is no other stuff to do#and then i will resume the usual thing where i don't go in on weekends and get the other stuff done then#i will of course inevitably burn out again but such is life when you have mental illness up the wazoo#honestly if the doctors were open on weekends that would solve a lot of my problems bc i keep forgetting to order my meds#and then i remember on the weekend but then they're closed and im like ok on monday then#and then by the time monday rolls around i forget rinse and repeat#im on the verge of running out again but fuck it we ball#i will figure this out somehow#im on top of literally everything else at least so. here's to hoping i can make it in on monday#apologies to my sister in advance for the 5 million alarms i must set but i am a very heavy sleeper#asks
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knifehandsgf · 10 months
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Can it be sad posting hours rn
#im gonna make it sad posting hours#as much as im happy i found out I'm autistic#it's led to such an even more isolating experience#i finally got tests run and found out im probably just going to be disabled for the rest of my life#ive had horrid knee pain that just aches and throbe#i cant cook anymore or do dishes or bend over to pick anything up#I've been living off microwavable and ready made food because i cant handle the pain anymore#and all i can do for it is get braces/physical therapy/painkillers/take care of myself as best as i can.#and i dont feel like i can talk about it#i dint feel like i have anyone that will actually sit down and feel emotionally vulnerable with me#or understand me#i feel like my symptoms and what I've already been tested for are being dismissed by everyone#no one believed i was autistic either.#i had friends and famiky immediately dismiss it every time i would talk about it#same with the pain#told to take ibuprofen and just eat better#as if that's going to fix this fast enough so i can function again#i can't afford anything right now because all of money went to needs this paycheck#i just feel lonely and isolated#I've been feeling apart emotionally mourning this finding#i just keep finding all the signs that were missed and ignored by my parents and told how lazy i am#and now im finally getting disability diagnosis and im completely alone in it#it sucks when you've been the one to listen to others your whole life#and not question any friends or loved ones when they think there's something wrong with them#but then be told it could be so many other things when i have concerns#or be treated like im not smart enough to know my body#i dont feel like i get the support i give out ever.#I'm more alone and more disabked than ever
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osachiyo · 6 months
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love, love, what do you think about a reader who has really thick thighs :0 how would the bsd men react to it >:0 I feel like Nikolai/Dazai would like to force the reader to sit on their face lol (it’s a thirst just in case!!)
˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱ note. . . AAAAAA this ask made me so insane tysm for this nonnie. . . (mdni) not proofread sorry im a lazy fuck </3
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dazai would love them, maybe so much so that its a little concerning— only a little though ! he'd lovee to lay his head on your plush thighs, whining for you to sing him to sleep— its the only way he can get some rest, y'know? he already loves your thighs so much but if you like wearing booty shorts, tights or even stockings? this man is a goner. just a heads up though, they're gonna be ripped to shreds by the time he's done with you. and no, he's not gonna buy you new ones (he's too broke ya'll)
he's definitely gonna beg you to sit on his face— at least do it once for him, won't you? oh but when you actually give in, he's so fucking happy he could basically die. he'd even say it to you— pretty brown lashes fluttering as he slurs out muffled words like— "god, bella. i could just— could just suffocate between these thighs," and if you know him, you know he's being dead serious. but you can't bring yourself to complain when he's practically making out with your pussy so fuckin' good, making you drool and sputter your words as he runs his tongue up and down your slick folds. filthy slurping noises escaping his lips while his fingers dig into the fat of your thighs— they're definitely gonna bruise later..♡
chuuya would find them adorable. he just loves to bury his face between them. not even in a dirty or suggestive way— he just found it so comforting, y'know? but also would be downright mesmerized by the way your thighs jiggle and spill out of your tights— blood rushing to his face and he can't help but sneak a couple glances at your plump thighs. shit, did they look good but he just wanted to rip them off as soon as possible.
and rip them off he did— blunt nails easily ripping the fabric of your mesh tights as he continues lapping at your soaked cunt. he only chuckled when you gasped and whined about how those were your last pair! he'd peak his head from between your spread thighs— tongue running over his swollen lips and god, did he look like a total fucking mess. his eyes were glazed over with pure lust and love for you— twinkling with delight as you moaned and clutched onto the bedframe, holding on for dear life as chuuya ate you out like a fucking animal. a sloppy grin graced his features, hand moving from your thigh to reach between your legs— pushing two gloved fingers in with ease. "relax, doll. I'll buy you all the tights you need. jus' lemme enjoy my fuckin' meal." and with that, he dived right back in..♡
fyodor found the contrast between your body and his own adorable. he was tall, lanky and slim. you, on the otherhand, were plush, soft and just....so enticing to him. he loved each and every part of your body, of course but your thighs— god, your thighs. he'd love to just bury his face between them and stay there for hours. not that he'd ever admit it, though. his pride wouldn't allow it. that doesn't mean he wouldn't show his adoration for them in a...different way, of course.
he'd lay you down gently on your shared bed, kissing every part of your body from head to those delicious thighs of yours. and after he's finally done— he'd press them together before sliding his cock in between. what? why're you looking at him with those pitiful eyes of yours? what better way to showcase his love for your plush thighs than to fuck them, no? he'd shudder at the way the flushed head of his pretty cock would catch against your clit with every drag of his hips. he'd only laugh cruelly at your whining and begging for him to just put it in! oh well, he's not stopping anytime soon until he gets to cum all over your pussy and those pretty thighs of yours so..goodluck..♡
nikolai would just.. keep his hands on you all the damn time. i mean, how could he not? when you're practically asking him for it! that's why you decided to wear those tight stockings, didn't you? to show off your mouth-watering thighs to the world? he just couldn't keep his eyes off them the entire fucking day. the way the fabric clung and dug into the meat of your thighs and fuck. how could he not get rock hard?
and that's how you ended up seated on his pretty fuckin' face. eager tongue exploring your insides as guttural groans and growls left his parted lips. he was soaked— head getting squeezed by your thighs and he could almost cum from the feeling. his hands were also busy— occasionally slapping and pinching the soft fat on your thighs and snickering at your high pitched squeals. he'd also lift you a little by grabbing the back of your thighs just to look at you with those drunk-dazed eyes. and fuck, he was practically pussy drunk. he wasn't at fault though! it's all your fault for having such nice fucking thighs..♡
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©sachiyoh— do not copy, plagiarize and repost my works to any platform, reblogs are very appreciated♡
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1-800-kami · 8 months
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R U MINE? feat gojo satoru (II)
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gojo satoru has got to be the picture definition of a stereotypical college frat boy. he’s cocky, loaded with his daddy’s money, and dangerously handsome. it seems like common sense to stay away from him since you’ll never get more than a one-night stand out of it. 
that’s why you choose to turn a blind eye once you’ve come to the horrific realization: you’re in love with him. and you’re just itching to ask…
“are you mine tomorrow? or just mine tonight?”
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IMPORTANT: this is part TWO (and the final part) of the r u mine? mini series. make sure to read part one of this fic before proceeding! :)
content: 5.4k words, afab!reader, rich college frat boy gojo, SMUT (fingering & unprotected sex.. wrap it before u tap it kids!) ANGST, (i listened to deftones while writing the breakup era LMAOO i was in my feels 😔) gojo "everything reminds me of her" satoru is really going thru it, idk how to feel about the ending tbh, cheating implications, kinda proofread ig, more emo gojo (u luv to see it)
author's note: guys. where do i even start?? first of all, thank u for all the support on the first part of this mini series!! we also hit 100 followers on this blog so tysm for supporting me n my writing <3 here's the long awaited part two (n also the finale) as i promised that i would get it out over the weekend! just a quick announcement that i may be a little bit more inactive from here on out.. mainly because classes r starting again nd im starting to get busier. i do have more fic plans though, (and a geto smut in my drafts? 👀) so i'll make time to write when i can! happy reading and thank u for all the support on this silly little series :)
tags: @soley613 @feariteriu @bear-likes-mushrooms @96jnie @keilaq1 @whydohumansss @luftyluft @fatbootymuncher (bold = i'm unable to tag u)
reblog and interact for a kiss ;)
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everything’s been hazy.
you don’t really remember how you got home– you either waved down a cab or walked until you somehow found your house. either way, the alcohol is worsening the pounding in your ears. the straps of your dress are clinging terribly against your skin–you want to take it off, you want to wear something more comfortable, you want to just go to sleep, preferably forever… but you can’t bring yourself to.
you can’t even bring yourself to move.
so the rumors really were true? but why did gojo pursue so far just for you? why did gojo say those words to you when you spent the night together? why did gojo try so hard to convince you that night that he wanted to have sex with you because he loved you–and not solely because he wanted to have sex?
why did gojo lie to you?
another series of pings sound throughout the room, and you finally move to silence your phone. the noise is all so overwhelming. why the hell is your phone blowing up?
you check your notifications–mostly dms from people you don’t know, either asking if you and satoru were dating, or questioning you about what the hell happened at the party. you know that you’re gonna be the subject of gossip once you’re back at campus, and you hate it.
you were surprised at the numbers once you scrolled down your notification list a little further. ten missed calls from satoru, accompanied by a series of fifteen panicked messages. you open it, and you stare sadly at his contact photo and name, remembering the fond memory behind it. once you two actually started dating, you were merciful enough to add a heart next to his name, and even updated it to “toru”. he was elated at that.
you think you can barely even call him gojo now.
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the most recent message was barely sent a minute ago. like it was on cue, you see the bright headlights pull up outside of your door. you wanted to sink into your couch and never resurface ever again.
you hear suguru’s car door open and close, and then frantic knocking outside. you walk to the door while sniffling, looking through the peephole just to confirm your suspicions. it was satoru.
“i can hear you crying through the door, y/n. i know you’re there.” he takes a deep inhale, and the tears start rolling down your cheeks again once you hear the complete and utter vulnerability in his voice. you just don’t know what to believe anymore. “shit, i’m crying too. well, i’m gonna explain myself even if you don’t care enough to listen to me. uhm, believe it or not, what happened at the party wasn’t my doing… at all. when you went to use the bathroom, this girl went up to me and started flirting with me, like she was waiting for you to leave or somethin’. i was g’na tell her to go fuck off but she pushed herself on my lap and before i could do anything about it you walked in and it was just all horrible timing and- god. i know it sounds unbelievable, right? you must think i’m terrible right now.”
“you don’t have to believe me. if i were in your shoes i wouldn’t know what to think either. i’m just… explaining what happened.”
there’s a long period of silence between you and satoru, aside from the occasional sniffling on both ends. you don’t know what to say. you want to believe him. you want to do nothing more than to open the door and let him hold you in his arms again, but you just don’t know what to think anymore. you poured your entire heart out to a man who you knew you shouldn’t be messing with, and now you don’t know who or what to believe. you feel like a fool, and you’re just tired. so damn tired. the silence feels asphyxiating, like it's tearing your relationship with satoru further and further apart the longer it draws on.
satoru is the first one to break the silence. “i’m guessing from the silent treatment that you don’t believe me. it’s okay, y/n. i’ll wait an eternity for you to forgive me because i’ll always choose you- fuck… over anything, and i hope you know that.”
your mind is a mess, and satoru’s words make it even messier.
i’ll wait an eternity for you
i’ll always choose you over anything
you put your head in your hands and sob. it hurts.
a minute passes–gojo hears you get up from where you’re sitting behind the door, and his heart fills with hope.
“i just… i just don’t know how to believe you, gojo.”
his heart breaks when he hears the door–presumably to your bedroom–open and close, leaving him alone with his shattered heart. his heart breaks when he takes in your voice, noticing how weak and exhausted you sounded. he wonders how much you’ve cried just from this past hour alone. his heart breaks once he realizes that he’s alone with his thoughts again, alone with the voice in his head that was berating him for not being able to prevent all of this if he hadn’t frozen up and just pushed her away the second that girl started flirting with him. finally, his heart breaks once it registers that you called him gojo–the last name that he shares with his corrupt and money-crazy family… the family he tries so hard to get away from. it was also the name you called him during the days that you barely trusted him.
now, he’s back to square one, and he has none of your trust again. this time, satoru swears that he’ll do anything in his power to get it back once more.
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you didn’t come to school today.
there’s been nothing but radio silence on your end. gojo has sent you countless messages over the weekend asking how you’ve been, with the occasional desperate voicemail where he tells you that he loves and misses you. you’ve turned off your read receipts, so gojo doesn’t even know if you’ve seen his texts or listened to his voicemails. he’s concerned for you, even though he knows that he’s the reason behind all of this. he was hoping to talk things out with you today.. but you weren’t even here.
one thing gojo knew about you is that you cared deeply about your academics, and you wouldn’t miss attendance even if you were sick. it pains him to know that he was the reason that you weren’t here today. you were avoiding him, and he felt helpless.
he’s talked to geto—and the best advice that his best friend could offer was to “find proof that you didn’t cheat on her.” he’s right, though. the last thing you had said to gojo was that you don’t know how to believe if he’s telling the truth or not. gojo has absolutely no idea how to prove his fidelity to you, since words clearly weren’t enough. it frustrates him to no end.
gojo now knows that he feels absolutely lost. all when he’s not with you.
it feels nerve-wracking to walk the halls. 
he remembers telling you the night that you slept together that he’d learned over time to drown out the rumors about him. he learned not to care about what other people thought about him, and he eventually became unaffected by the school’s gossip. 
however, this time was different.
this time, he finds it difficult to drown out the rumors when he hears your name in them. he flinches every time someone whispers your name and his as he walks the halls, feeling that all eyes are on him. “i heard y/n and gojo broke up…” “they were dating?!” “yeah.. i didn’t believe it at first, either! apparently he…”
he doesn’t want to hear it, so he walks a little faster. it hasn’t felt this suffocating to be on campus in a while.
maybe that’s partially why you didn’t show up. rumors are hard to ignore if you don’t know how to shun them out. 
gojo lets out a sigh. he decides that he’s going to ditch the rest of class. you weren’t here, he couldn’t talk to you, and he felt he was gonna go mad if he heard your name spoken by someone again, so he turns to leave, but flinches as he feels a hand lightly tap his shoulder.
“gojo-san?”
he turns around, with a girl that he’s never seen before standing in front of him… not that he pays attention to them in the first place, though. he raises his eyebrow in question, and the girl looks so nervous she might pass out. “i have to tell you something-“
“if it’s a love confession or whatever, i don’t want to hear it-“
“-no!” she flushes a deep shade of red, and he fights the urge to roll his eyes. she coughs awkwardly at his expression. “um, no.. it’s not that. please, just give me two minutes in the library. i have something to tell you.”
he decides to entertain this girl for a bit. he’d be lying if he said that he wasn’t curious about what she had to talk to him for. gojo sighs and says, “two minutes. that’s all you’re getting.”
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“this is about the party last friday, no?” he says while taking a seat near one of the tables. he feels sick just being here. he’d never gone to the library before meeting you–as he had no reason to go here at all. then, he started accompanying you everywhere as he tried to win your heart. “study dates” were frequent here, and he even remembers forcefully changing his contact name and number on your phone during one of your dates.
gosh, everything literally reminds him of you. he can barely live like this.
she takes a seat across from him, and she shamefully nods at his words. “i went to the party on friday, and i just want to say i’m sorry-”
gojo gets up to leave. he can’t do this. he doesn’t need anyone’s pity. pity can’t change the fact that you still won’t talk to him. she panics as gojo is about to walk away. “wait!”
the librarian tells her to quiet down, and she mutters an apology. still, she persists. “please, just wait for two minutes… i need two minutes to explain myself. you promised you’d give me that.”
she stares at gojo, who hasn’t left yet, and takes that as her opportunity to speak. “i was a friend of… her,” he doesn’t need an explanation to know who she was talking about. “the reason why she came up to you was because of a dare i told her to do. she’s had a crush on you for a while now, so of course she was willing to flirt with you.”
“um, that was the dare, by the way. my friend told me to record it, because we were all drunk, and we thought it would be funny. just another memory to laugh at in the future, right? we didn’t know you were dating the girl you were with at the party. sorry but, we assumed she was just a fling… or something… we didn’t know she was your girlfriend.”
“yeah, i was dating the girl at the party.” gojo scoffs, and he feels his anger bubbling up again. “then your friend had to do that stupid dare, and she won’t fuckin’ talk to me now.”
“i’m sorry-”
“i don’t need your apologies. is that why you came up to me? to apologize so you don’t feel guilty about what happened anymore?” gojo sneers. he was right, though. guilt is ridden all over her face, and she can’t even meet his eyes. he’s about to leave, thinking that this entire conversation was useless, but gojo thinks back on what she said earlier.
“...my friend told me to record it…”
he turns back to look at her, which surprises her, to say the least. “hey, you said you recorded the dare, right?”
“uhm, yes.”
“so you still have the video?”
“it should be in my camera roll somewhere-”
“if you came here to apologize to me, then you should send me that video.” she looked a little horrified at his words, and gojo could almost laugh. “what? i’m not gonna do anything bad with it, god.”
she thinks about what gojo’s intentions could be with that video, and her eyes light up in recognition as she connects the dots from what he said beforehand. i was dating the girl at the party… then your friend had to do that stupid dare… and she won’t fuckin’ talk to me now.
she nods in understanding. this is the least she could do for him. she pulls out her phone, looking for the video, and says, “i hope you two make up soon, gojo-san.”
gojo satoru walks- no, runs out of that library with determination. determination as he finally has the video evidence of what happened at the party–his saving grace so he could finally get you to forgive him.
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you miss him.
you miss him like hell, actually, and you blink at the messages he just sent you in complete disbelief.
you didn’t show up to class today because you were afraid. you were afraid to see satoru again, yes, but you were also afraid of what everyone else would say about you. the party was one thing, but the after-effects and the rumors were something completely different. you didn’t have the mental capacity to deal with that, unlike satoru, so you stayed home. all because you were afraid of what would happen on campus.
you just wish things would go back to how they were before… all of this happened. you didn’t want to admit it, but you’ve read all of satoru’s messages, and you’ve listened to all of his voicemails. you’ve cried to them. and it hurts because you’re still torn apart in the midst of your own feelings. and now, satoru wants to talk to you, because he’s been wanting to do nothing but fix everything between the two of you.
the doorbell rings, and you almost jump out of your skin. 
you didn’t even know if you would open the door or not. despite that, you felt your body moving on its own, like you were relying on your own instincts. you washed your face to get rid of the dried tears on your cheeks, brushed the tangles out of your hair, and dressed into something more presentable. the next thing you know, you’re leaning against the wall next to the front entrance. your shadow is visible underneath the door, so satoru knows that you’re here.
“hi, y/n..” he sounded so nervous that you almost laughed, but you felt equally as terrified as him. “i have something to show you… uh, on my phone. if you don’t want to see me, it’s fine, i’ll just send it to you, but i’d really prefer if you open the door and we’ll talk about this inside-”
your hand is already reaching the door knob before you can even think about it. it’s such an impulse decision that you look at him in surprise once you open the door. it’s the first time you’ve seen him ever since you were at the party. it’s only been three days, but you can’t help but notice how his eyebags are more prominent, his eyes are a little redder, and he looks nothing short of exhausted.
“hey,” he manages to breathe out, his eyes meeting yours. “can i come in? please?”
you nod, too stunned to say anything, and he exhales in relief as he walks in. the two of you sit on the couch, and gojo notices how you’re keeping your distance from him. it breaks his heart a little.
he looks for the video on his phone and gets ready to show it to you. this is it. his last ditch effort for your forgiveness. he’s really fuckin’ hoping that this works. “i got this video from a girl who came to the party. it’s a recording of, um, what happened.”
he hands the phone over to you, and you take it skeptically, still choosing to keep silent. you press play, and you watch the recording. a shaky hand holds the camera, and the person behind it says, “holy shit, she’s actually doing it!” they're presumably talking to their friend, and the camera focuses on a girl walking over to gojo. your heart is pounding, eyes widening in recognition as you stare at her... the one who caused all of this in the first place.
the all too familiar girl comes up to him, saying something out of earshot. when gojo looks at her, completely uninterested, she pulls that move. the scene you saw at the party before you ran out. tears fill your eyes again, and you almost want to stop the video, but your interest is piqued at the next part.
..this… this part was something that you didn’t see. gojo angrily reacts at the girl’s move, with her falling on the floor as she looks at him, stunned at how furious he looks. the person behind the camera gasps, continuing to record out of shock as a crowd of people turn to stare at the two. geto eventually comes into the frame and takes gojo away from all the chaos. the video ends there, and you grip gojo’s phone shakily.
holy shit.
tears roll down your face, but this time, they’re tears of relief. you waste no time in hugging satoru, crying your heart out as you bury your face in his neck. you’re happy. you’re so fucking happy, and so relieved knowing that he didn’t lie to you. of course he didn’t.
“m’sorry-” you sniffle into his shoulder. gojo is so shocked at what was happening that it takes him a second to hug you back, but when he does, he starts crying. “m’so fucking sorry i didn’t believe you-”
“shh, it’s okay, it’s okay…” he says, and you only hug him tighter. “m’so tired, you know that? these past three days fucking sucked. i’m just so glad you’re in my arms again, fuck-”
“-i love you, i love you, i love you so fucking much, toru.” you repeat, laughing as you kiss him all over his face. it’s been a while since you said that to someone. you wipe his never-ending tears away, still in disbelief, and whisper, “you’re real. right? you’re actually here with me right now ‘nd i’m not dreaming, right?
“i’m very much real, baby.” he says, putting his forehead against yours as you take in his features again. “god, i missed that pretty face so much.”
he finally closes the gap between you two, pulling you into a much needed kiss. it’s a kiss filled with so many emotions–desperation, happiness, relief. satoru thinks his heart is finally whole again. he’s missed you. he’s missed you so fucking much, and you’ve missed him too. 
you’re like an anchor to satoru. the light of his life that keeps him grounded. and god, he’s been apart from you for too long. 
you reposition yourself as you’re deepening the kiss. you’re on his lap now, and you wrap your arms around his neck, tugging on his hair in desperation. “oh yeah? ‘y gonna do anything about it?"
“of course i am,” he says, hands roaming underneath your shirt as he caresses your bare waist. fuck. he needs you. right now. especially after thinking that he was about to lose you forever–for something that he didn’t even do. “i’m gonna show you just how much i missed you, baby.”
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gojo can’t let you go.
you’re in your bedroom, and both of you waste no time undressing each other. he takes you in–all of you, in awe of every crevice of your body as he trails his hands further down your waist.
god, you’re so beautiful. “i can’t believe i almost lost you.”
his words are shaky, like he’s still uncertain that you’re real and you’re in his arms again. he can’t seem to break himself away from you, almost like you’ll disappear if he lets you go. “but i’m here now, toru.”
“i’m here to stay, and i’ll never let you go again… ‘m yours,” you whisper, and your words set a fire in him, fueling his body with nothing but desperation. desperation to have you right here, and right now. 
he wastes no time in plunging two of his fingers in your cunt, and he groans at just how wet you are. “satoru-”
“fuck, you’re so wet… and it’s all for me,” he mutters, spreading your legs effortlessly when you try to close them, thighs shaking in pure pleasure. he adds another finger, and you already feel stretched to the brim, and you haven’t even taken him in yet. the thought of his cock inside of you makes you even wetter than you already are, and you look up at satoru with eyes full of lust and desire. “missed you so much, baby. missed you and your pretty little cunny,”
his fingers are long, and you whine at how full you feel right now. you’re so loud, and you don’t even care. right now, it’s just you and satoru finally feeling each other again. it’s only been three days, but it feels like you’ve been apart for years.
everything about this was filthy. from your erotic moans and the way your cunt squelched against his fingers… not to mention the vice grip you had on them- fuck, satoru thinks he can cum untouched just from watching you like this.
“haa-” you whimper when his fingers curl and hit that spot in your cunt that you can barely seem to reach on your own. it’s exhilarating, and only fuels the growing heat in your stomach. “toru- don’t stop- please, i’m close-”
“really?” he taunts, and it feels so fucking good–your head is numb, and the only thoughts filling your head are thoughts of satoru. the pleasure is too much, and you try to get away from him, but he keeps you in place, curling his fingers faster as punishment. “don’t run away from me, baby… be a good girl and just take it, yeah?”
“toru- fuck- i’m gonna cum, please-” you’re on the brink of release, but suddenly, he stops, ruining your orgasm. “no- wait-”
he pulls his fingers out, and you whine at the loss of stimulation. you were so close–why did he take that away from you? you try and swat at his hands, but he just takes his fingers and puts them in his mouth, locking his eyes with yours with a sly smile. “you taste so sweet, i can’t help it,”
“aww, is my baby mad ‘cause she didn’t get to cum?” he coos sarcastically, caging you in between his arms as he tilts your face up with his finger. “too bad… the only thing you’re cumming on tonight is on my cock.”
and with that, he eases his painfully hard member into your walls. your insides hugged him perfectly–it was like you were made just for him. you gasp once he’s fully sheathed himself inside of you. his fingers were already a lot to take in, but his cock was something completely different. he moans your name, barely keeping his cool. “fuck- you’re squeezing me so tight,”
“missed everything about you, baby. i need to hold you, please,” he pleads desperately, clasping your small hands against his. the size difference alone between the two of you almost makes him cum, but he holds himself back, choosing to bask in this intimate moment. he’s missed every part about this. “you ready f’me?-”
“-just fuck me, satoru, please-” he doesn’t need another confirmation from you.
he can’t bring himself to hold back. next thing you know, he’s fucking you into the mattress, and you feel the headboard shake at how fast satoru is going. fuck–you feel every part of him, every part of his cock as it slams against your tight hole. he’s so big, you feel yourself gasping for breath, and you moan out loud as you notice the prominent bulge forming in your stomach. it’s him, it’s all him, and it’s driving you mad.
satoru follows your eyes in the midst of all of this, and he watches everything in fascination. he decides to be a little mean, and presses his free hand against your stomach–it feels so good, you could almost scream at the pleasure. “you feel that, baby? that’s all me inside of you, hmm?”
“please-” the onset of pleasure feels so overwhelming, and tears fill your eyes. you feel an oncoming orgasm coming, and you know your release will hit you like a tidal wave. your heart is pounding, but satoru only grips your hand tighter and fucks you even harder. “oh, fuck!”
“m close, baby. are you g’na cum too?” he manages to say between pants, and you somehow nod, mind hazy and your release only coming closer. you feel your eyes rolling to the back of your head. “cum inside of me, toru- please- i need to feel you-”
gojo groans at your words, and you both cum together. you ride out your high, screaming as you spasm around his cock, the pleasure overfilling your senses until you’re trembling from it. he fills you up, staying inside of you as the two of you catch your breath. everything’s hazy, and you’re barely aware of your surroundings… it takes you a few minutes to recover. 
“angel, are you with me?”
“yeah, fuck, just… give me a second.” you say, and gojo thinks that he would gladly give you all the time in the world if you needed it. he pulls out of you with a hiss, and his warm seed drips out of your cunny. it makes his cock twitch, but he knows that you’re probably not considering a round two right now.
when you come to your senses, you notice satoru–who put his clothes back on already, wiping your legs down with a rag. his touch is so soft, like he’s afraid to break you, unlike how he handled you just a moment ago. you look down and notice the bruises starting to form on your legs and waist. satoru looks guilty as he stares. “i didn’t go too rough with you, did i?”
“not at all,” you reassure him, and you see him soften up a little. “it felt really good, actually… thank you, toru.”
“s nothing. you know my girl only gets the best,” he teases, and you laugh. “i’m gonna go get you some new clothes and some water… i’ll be back, okay?”
you nod, closing your eyes again as satoru leaves the room. he’s back in two minutes, and he’s gently changing you into new clothes that he found in your drawer. you’re so tired that you can hardly move, so you let satoru do all the work. he caresses all of your bruises, apologizing again even if you already said that it was okay. he’s so gentle, a swift juxtaposition to what just happened beforehand, and so soft with you. once you’re clothed again, he brings a glass of water against your lips, and you greedily gulp it down as he keeps a hand on your back. he places it on the nightstand once you’re finished, and you grab his wrist after, tugging him back to the bed. “lay with me for a bit, toru.”
satoru doesn’t hesitate, laying down next to you on the bed and placing your head against his chest. your breathing is back to normal, and you feel his heart thumping against your ear. you wrap your arms around him, and satoru thinks that this moment is so domestic that he can’t help but daydream. he looks at your face, memorizing every feature about you with a lovesick look in his eyes. you’re so beautiful, so perfect, and he’s just so fucking glad that he didn’t lose you. 
satoru thinks he could wake up to this everyday.
“you’re starin.” you say with an amused look on your face. gojo doesn’t even try to play it off. “what’s on your mind?”
“nothing. i just… love you so much, y/n.” he says, pulling you closer and kissing your forehead. satoru would trade anything if it meant that this moment wouldn’t end. “m so glad you chose me.”
“i think it’s the other way around,” you tease. “you chose me. ever since you saw me at the party, you’ve done nothing but try to win my heart.”
“how could i not? there was just something different about you compared to everyone else.” he reminisces about that night at the party, and how far he’s come with his relationship with you. he remembers that night like it just happened yesterday.
you sigh, almost like you were thinking about that night too. you pull him into a kiss, finally finding the courage within you to say a proper “i love you.” to the man who meant the world to you.
“i love you too, angel.” he says, and you snuggle into him tighter. “you know i’ll always choose you…”
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“..from this life and into the next. i’m so glad you gave me a chance, y/n. i’ll forever be grateful to now be called your husband. i’m the luckiest man ever knowing that you let me into your life, and i’m the one who gets to read these vows to marry you. i cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you. i love you so much, y/n gojo.” he’s crying. gojo satoru is crying, and he’s hardly ever cried before. though, that changed after he met you.
the last time he cried was during pre-k, and now he’s done it time and time again… all because of you. he cried once during your first argument with him, another during the night he thought he’d lost you forever, and then another when he finally had you in his arms again once he proved his innocence… and now, during his wedding, when he finally gets to call you his wife.
and when you share your kiss at the end of the ceremony to symbolize your togetherness, you hear all your friends cheering. mainly shoko, utahime, and geto. if you showed this very scene to shoko during your university years, she’d call you crazy, saying this would never happen. gojo satoru was once a man who’d never willingly committed in a relationship before, but you came into his life and you changed everything about him. it was like magic.
you pull away from the kiss, wiping his tears away and whispering against his lips, drowning out the crowd, “thank you.”
for memorizing all my favorite foods so you could buy them for me. for walking me to class every day. for making me fall in love with you that one day at the park. for waiting for me to slowly love you even when i was scared to love. for waiting for me even if i didn’t trust you. for loving me. for proving those rumors wrong. for proving that satoru gojo is actually capable of falling in love and pouring his heart out to the one he loves the most.
for everything that you have done to love me.
it was like gojo could hear all of your unspoken words. he smiles, letting one more tear roll down his cheek, and says, “it’s all worth it if it’s for you.”
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thanks for reading <3 -kami.
2K notes · View notes
cordeliawhohung · 4 months
Note
omg. imagine coming home from a day of work, grumbling about how bad it was, not knowing that mafia!simon's actually home. when you see him you try to be silent about it but nuh uh! he already heard you. btw im in love with him your honor im so happy i found your account first thing in 2024. i hope the rest of the year treats you well even if it doesnt during its first few weeks
!!! you're so sweet ): thank you so much, and i'm so glad you're having fun with these idiots as much as i am!!! i wish you nothing but the best for 2024
work was long, brutal, and tiring. five reservations, 150 customers rushing in and out, and two screaming matches in the kitchen that could be heard from the front of house later and you were finally home. your feet ached something fierce and you haphazardly kicked your shoes off at the door to the flat as soon as you came in before meandering into the kitchen like a zombie.
"need to find a new job this is getting ridiculous," you grumbled. eyes glazed over, you mindlessly searched through the cupboards, unsure of what you were even looking for until you found a plastic cup. "who just talks to someone like that?"
the sound of running water filled the mostly silent kitchen as you poured yourself a cup of water from the sink. you shut it off with a heavy sigh before raising the cup to your lips and leaving it there for a moment before bowing your head.
"maybe i should just quit, but i'm useless at everything else i do and i don't know who else would hire me..." you admitted to yourself with a trembling bottom lip.
"what's goin' on, sweetheart?"
Simon's voice came as such a surprise you nearly spilled water on yourself when you turned around to face him. he stood in the doorway, eyes tired yet still examining you and your mussed uniform all the same. with shaky hands, you placed your cup on the counter next to the sink before attempting to smooth down your clothes.
"n-nothing just, tired from work is all," you excused. but it was too late for that. he had been standing there for much too long to not have heard your ramblings.
"someone buggin' you at work?" he inquired further.
"no, no just-" you attempted to reply, but your voice cracked and a sudden pressure built up behind your eyes.
it didn't take long for Simon to close the distance between you two. solid and grounding arms wrapped around you before he gently pulled you into his chest and kissed the top of your head. "c'mon. let's run you a bath, yeah? you can tell me all about those cunts at work."
also, is now a bad time to tell you guys that Simon's mom is alive in this universe or?
645 notes · View notes
elletheactualmenace · 5 months
Text
Amazing
Pairing: 10th Doctor x Fem!reader
Summary: Uhh…No plot smut…?
Warnings: Smut, breeding kink, light hearted teasing, tit!play, fem!reader
Word Count: 2.7k
a/n: @abbygraceasd Im done!! Thanks for the request! Also first time smut writer so, uh, sorry if it’s horrible😭 Also, also The Doctor might be a little ooc. Anyways enjoy!
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“You are amazing,” the Doctor mumbles against your lips. He leans his body closer to yours, stopping you from escaping his touch.
Your body is squished between The Doctor and your bedroom door. But, you aren’t mad at the situation you have found yourself in. In fact you're happy, as the Doctor moves the hand against the door to trail up and down your clothed body. 
You could stay like this forever, you think as your arms wrap around his coat to the back of his neck to grasp at the hairs there. He groans as you tug.
“How was I amazing?” You tease trying to get him riled up more. He leans back slightly smirking at the question.
“You were bold, and brave and you looked so sexy in that outfit you picked out.” He leans in kissing your neck, leaving wet patches on your skin. “And don’t get me started on the touchiness. You knew what you were doing.”
You chuckle out, amused.
“Oh? And what was that?” You ask running your fingers through his brown hair. He hums as he pulls away from a kiss to your shoulder. “You wanted to get me in here.” He pauses, not sure if he should say what he's thinking. 
“In you,” He finally whispers, but the second you smirk at his shyness he regrets his tone of voice.
“You’re not wrong,” You purse your lips waiting for his next move. He looks down at you for a moment, taking in your face and the parts of your body he can see at this angle. Oh, how he wants to see you under him, begging for him to cum inside you, to make a mess of you.
The Doctor can feel his already tight pants tighten. He squeezes his eyes shut as he takes a deep breath trying to calm down and take it slow. Just how he knows you like it.
“Okay, enough talking,” He decides and bends down to pick you up into his arms. You let out a gasp of amusement as he pulls you into a heated kiss. You wrap your legs around his waist as he carries you over to your shared bed.
“Sometimes I forget that you are strong.” You smile into the kiss. The comment causes him to pull back and give you a very offended look. You quickly apologize with a kiss to his cheek.
“I’ll have you know that I am a lot tougher than any bodybuilder you can find on Earth.” The Doctor sticks his head up high with pride. “And,” He adds, “I don’t want to hear it from you, you didn’t lift a finger when I asked for help fixing the console,” He's not actually annoyed, he's just messing with you. You know because of the way he rolls his eyes with a smirk.
“Please! It was 4 am and we had been up all night because of you,” The Doctor feels his cheeks heat up at the memory. You couldn’t handle another round, but the Doctor still had loads or energy to get out. So he went to fiddle with the console, and you refused to get up from bed. So, It was a fair point on your part.
“Right…” He says with a grumpy pout. You smirk again.
“That’s what I thought-“ He cuts you off, pressing his lips against yours, letting his tongue run along your bottom lip before diving in. His tongue rolls against yours and he can taste the gum you were chewing earlier. He hums, almost moans, into your mouth as he runs his tongue along every inch of your mouth he can reach.
Your legs tighten around him. You tug on his coat attempting to get it off. And then suddenly you’re dropped onto your soft mattress, gasping for air.
Before the Doctor does anything more, he lets his coat fall to the floor. He loosens his tie, and unbuttons and pulls off his suit jacket and shirt, leaving his tie on.
Your eyes trail over his body slowly, making sure he knows you're doing it. You bite back a groan as his hands brush the bare skin on your hips. He pulls down your pants leaving you in your panties, they are tardis blue and the Doctor smirks. You roll your eyes pulling him by his tie against your lips.
This kiss is soft, slow, and you can really feel the tingle of his warm lips. It makes your stomach tighten in excitement. You can feel the build up of wet heat in your blue panties. 
Lord how you want him right here right now.
“Take these off,” you mummer against him, pulling at his trousers. But the Doctor shakes his head pulling away from your reach.
“Oh, no no no,” The Doctor tuts, “I'm in charge here,” his eyes get dark with want and need. The look in his chocolate eyes makes your breath hitch. He leans in again, but this time targeting your thighs.
His mouth meets your soft skin, and he begins sucking gently, looking up at you through his lashes. He runs his hands up and under your shirt, making you squeak at his cold touch. His hands make their way up to your covered breasts. He kneads your chest with his large hands, and you finally throw your head back when you feel his wet tongue press against the fabric of your panties. The only thing separating his needy drooling mouth from your hot wet cunt is a thin piece of fabric.
“Take your top off.” The Doctor demands with a whisper. You comply ripping off your top and throwing it to the floor. The Doctor looks up with lustful eyes.
“Bra too.” You roll your eyes at him as you reach back to unclip it.
“Good.” He smirks.
The Doctor moves to grab hold of the edge of your painties with his teeth. Once he knows his grip is firm he pulls them down. He uses only teeth to pull your underwear all the way down to your feet.
You laugh at his idiotic antics and when he successfully throws your panties to the floor he smiles too.
The Doctor crawls back up your body, and stops when he meets face to face with your bare cunt.
“You look so fucking pretty right now.” You breathlessly whisper as his breath feathers over your slit.
“Mmm” He hums taking in your alluring scent. “But not as pretty as you,” he loops his arm around your thigh giving each a kiss before pulling you flush against his awaiting mouth.
The Doctor moves quickly, spreading your arousal with his tongue. Your breath gets caught in your throat as you feel his lips wrap around your clit, leaving just enough room for his tongue to poke out between his lips and swirl around your clitt.
You fight a groan as his lips suck and his tongue circles. Your body quivers and the Doctor has to use the arms around your thighs to keep you down. 
He moves back down to your opening and sticks his tongue in as far as he can get it to go. A growl bubbles up in his throat at the way you squeeze around him. The slurping noises further fuel The Doctor. He doesn’t know how much longer he can go without being balls deep in your drenched hole.
He laps at your cunt a while longer before he pulls back, licking his lips of your arousal. He uses the back of his hand to wipe the excess mess on his chin. All while keeping eye contact with you. It makes your head spin, and you haven't even cum yet.
“Think you're ready for me?” The Doctor asks as he climbs up your body making sure to eye your perky nipples longer then he should.
You only whine and nod in response. The Doctor smiles leaning in to peck your soft lips.
“Say it,” He insists nipping at your neck. “Out loud,” He sighs as he feels your hands run through his hair, the gesture making him lean into your touch with a soft noise of content.
“Y-yeah ‘m ready,” You whisper just loud enough for him to pick up. He smiles, and then pries your mouth open with his tongue. Once he's in, your tongues glide against each other. Moving as softly and swiftly as silk.
The Doctor groans as he pulls back and says, “Good,” with a smirk. He then dips his long fingers into you, where just a few moments ago his mouth was. He streches your tight cunt, trying to loosen you up before he shoves himself in you.
You can feel his bulge against your leg, and you swear on every dalek you ever have and ever will come across that you can feel it growing. You whimper and reach down to undo his pants, desperate for the agonizingly sweet stretch of his cock in you. 
“Okay darling,” He chuckles out at your eagerness. “Im working on it,” He tugs his pants down and with them his boxer briefs. His cock springs up, hitting his stomach in excitement.
“Come on, come on, come on,” you ramble out quickly in an attempt to get him faster.
“You need to calm down, or I won’t fuck you.” The Doctor threatens. “And I know how much you want me to.” He whispers the last part in your ear making your checks burn in embarrassment. But, you nod stilling your body, and even through your embarrassment you look up at him with desperate eyes. 
The Doctor moves to line up with your entrance and you hold your breath, waiting. As his tip sinks in you. The Doctor lets out a gasp he didn’t know he had in him. And then slowly the rest of his hard cock. 
The stretch stings, but it feels so good at the same time. And it is addicting. It’s like fire, so beautiful and welcoming yet it can be lethal if not used with precaution. But oh, how you wanted to swim in the fire. You both slot together like two pieces of a puzzle. So snug, so warm, and so perfect. You never want to leave, even if you end up burning yourself.
“What did I say? Amazing.” The Doctor moans out shuddering at the tight squeeze. You have limited vocabulary at the moment, but you manage to squeak out, “Another to add to-'' You get caught off guard when he pulls out of you almost fully before slamming right back into you. “T-the list, oh fu-fuck,” You studder out, finishing the thought he cut off.
He pulled out again this time faster, and he didn’t wait for as long before pushing in once again. The squelching sounds leave you a babbling mess. You're at The Doctors will. And he knows it just as much as you.
“Please, faster,” You say and The Doctor doesn’t falter in his response, “Why? Do you want me to fill you nice and full with my babies?” He asks, quickening his pace, per your request. You whimper at the idea of bearing his kids. You would be so swollen and full, and he would baby you, fuss about you. 
The Doctor's own words fuel his need for you even more than he thought possible. He would love to see your stomach swollen and huge with his heir. He would love to suck on your squishy, fat, breast as he fingers you. He would love to take care of you with his mouth, to help rest your aching body.
“Yes,” You spurt out, “Please,” You choke on your saliva as you watch his body move with yours. The bead of sweat on his forehead. The way his eyebrows scrunch with every movement he makes. His hips hitting yours with enough force to break the bed if he isn’t careful.
You grab hold of his swinging tie tugging it, bringing him lips to meet yours in a passionate, loving kiss. The stretch of his dick in you leaves you whimpering and whining into his mouth.
“Mhhhm,” you moan, you try to move your hand down to your clit. Needing the extra bit of stimulation to get to the beautiful edge sooner. Before you can reach in between the two of you The Doctor snatches your hand, pulling away from your lips.
“Oh, you really are greedy,” he tuts keeping his pace. “Tell me what you want and then I might give it to you.” The Doctor's hand reaches to grope your breast and flick your nipple as he continues to push in and out of you mercilessly.
You whimper and squirm as your eyes water. Your body tingles so close yet so far from where you want to be. 
“Please-,” you whine, grasping at his bare shoulders. 
“Just make me c-cum,” you babble out quietly. Desperate. Needy.
“How?” The Doctor teases, making you groan in annoyance and pleasure. When you don’t respond, he stops his thrusting completely. 
“W-why did you-“ 
“Use your words or I’ll stop.” He growled out, with his eyes glaring at you. You breathe heavily blinking to get your thoughts straight. The look on his face telling you this was just as hard for him as it is for you.
“Use your fingers,” you pause as he runs his finger against your perched nipple. He raised a brow waiting for you to continue. “On my cli-“
You don’t even have to finish the sentence before he begins pounding you, faster this time. He kiss you cheeks sloppily and whispers into your ear,
“As you wish,” he moves his hand down to your clit, wetting the tips of his fingers with your slick. He runs his fingers up to your swollen, awaiting bud. 
He twirls his fingers as his cock stretches you open. He pinches your clit and pounds your cunt, and you swear you can see stars.
“You're perfect.” The Doctor states breathlessly. “So beautiful, so tight and so perfect.” Your hips thrust up to meet him as his words. His voice and body are a song you can’t stop yourself from turning up.
“I'm going to fill you up so beautifully,” he moans out quietly, his heavy balls slapping your ass.
“Fuck-“ you cry, so near your peak. His thrust only gets faster with the sounds you make. His fingers move in quicker circles. The tingle of finishing so close.
“Go on,” he prompts, dipping his head down to suck on your neck. “Cum, for me.” 
His words are the final push into the pulsing pleasure. Your body shakes and twitches as he pounds you through your high. He moans softly as you pulse so tightly around him.
“Oh,” he moans, shuddering, “right there,” he grunts not far behind.
You can feel his hips falter and his pace slow. He moans so loud and so beautiful, it carries your high on longer than you thought possible. 
“Doctor,” You moan into his ear.
“Milk me sweetheart,” he groans as his hips thrust slower than before. His cum spurts into you, the warmth making you whimper for the hundredth time. You pull rope after rope after rope from his cock.
“So good, so fucking goo-“ he cuts himself off with a soft moan of your name as his eyes roll back. The Doctor's breathing gets jagged as your high turns into a fading buzz. 
You feel him come to a slow stop on his wobbly arms. His softened cock slowly pulls out of you. You both hiss as the loss or closeness, and The Doctor finally collapses onto the bed, right next to you. Your naked bodies pull the other one close.
You sigh, contently into his hair. His face squished against your boobs, just how he loves it. He chuckles as he helps you pull the blankets up and over your bodies. 
“You're right,” He comments, his breathing slowing down. You don’t respond for a moment, trying to think of what he means.
“Well of course I am,” you scoff softly. “But, just for the sake of the conversation, what am I right about?”
“There is one more thing to add to the list,” he replies simply, nuzzling into your chest.
“What?” You joke, “Being a good fuck?”
“No,” he says slightly taken aback, but the slight smile gives his true intentions away.
“Being a good wife.” He states calmly.
You chuckle and place a kiss on his messy head of hair.
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normansnt · 3 months
Note
Could I request a third part of the prince? I love it!
YES OMG YOU ARE MY FIRST REQUEST HIIII THANK YOU SM IM HAPPY YOU LIKE IT🧡🧡
Yeah I might have forgot to mention I do in fact take requests😎
Actually ya'll have been loving the prince series and I was wondering if you want me to making it into like a full blown story like following the series events and what not, or like just a little series of cute scenarios?
Let me know.
Warnings:
The prince (part 3)
(Alastor x male reader)
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Currently you were arguing with your father. Since the moment he found out you are dating Alastor he was not happy, to say the least.
"Why the sudden urge to leave? Is it not good here anymore because I can clean up the rubber ducks-"
"No dad thats not the point I just think I'm old enough to move out and Charlie has her hotel with a lot of rooms, and I mean I guess her dream is not that impossible-"
"Yeah right, like I'm going to believe that you just want to move in with that bambi of yours" he scoffed
"Dont call him- thats not- ok fine yeah, I want to move in with Alastor why is that such a problem I am a grown ass adult I can do as I please." And with that you left the room to pack.
--------------------------------------------------------------
"I swear, he still thinks I am a kid." You were pacing in Alastor's room while he was sitting on a couch and calmly drinking tea.
"He let Charlie go?? Why not me why cant I do what I want with my life" you continued your angry ranting while unpacking you clothes.
At this point you were basically moved in with Alastor. You had all your stuff there you just needed to unpack, which he solved with a flick of his wrist. You could have done that too, but your father raised both you and your sister to not be careless with the amount of power you have, also you were busy rambling.
"*sigh*...thank you honey." You said quietly as you took a seat next to him slumping into the couch.
Alastor looked at you. Till now he was just half listening to you ramble and he thought you would feel better once you let it out and you two could cuddle but right now you looked even more sad, defeated even.
This did not sit right with him. If there was anything he hated most was seeing you sad or hurt.
He took a hold of your hand and put his other one on your cheek to guide your head to look at him.
"My dear, this issue will be resolved just as any other, you will make up with your father." He reassured you with a smile.
"I know but than it will start again, and I'm starting to feel like he will never accept you even though you are so important to me and... it's just too much right now, I'm sorry I need to be alone." And with that you left.
There it was again. That stinging feeling in his chest. Alastor had to take matters into his own hands.
--------------------------------------------------------------
You walked down the stairs and took a seat by the bar.
"Damn kid, rough day?" Asked Husk as you put your head into your hands and groaned.
"Thats one way to put it, can you please get me a whisky on the rocks" you said in your ever so kind voice.
Husk liked you. On contrary to your father and older sister you were calm, quiet and well spoken. All this while still having the heart of gold they have as well.
He never understood how a charming young man such as yourself would find himself in a relationship with a demon like Alastor.
During your numerous visits to the Hotel you have talked to Husk a lot and you two became really good friends. The same went for Angel who usually joined you guys. You three usually sat by the bar chatting for hours.
"Hi (Y/N)," you heard Angels voice approaching as you sipped on your whisky. He took a seat next to you and shared a quick kiss with Husk. You chuckled to yourself quietly, you have been rooting for the two from the very beginning and when they finally got together you were so happy you shedded a few tears.
"Hi Angel" you gave him a small smile but he saw through it.
"Aww, toots hard times?" He asked as Husk handed him his drink.
"It's a long story" you answered.
"We got time" said Husk encouragingly.
You smiled a little than started telling the story.
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Alastor was on his way to find Charlie. He needed to solve the situation or he had to gauge his own eyes out so he doesn't have to see you sad.
He figured if he got your father to come to the hotel you can talk things out. As well as, he is going to try and make an effort not to be a complete ass with him but Lucifer has to try and be nice as well, for your sake.
He needed Charlie for this because if Alastor asked Lucifer to come he would not. However if Charlie asked, he'd be there in a second.
"Oh Charlie?" He wondered into the princess's room.
"Yes? OH Alastor HI how is my brother doing?" She asked with excitement. She was more than thrilled that her little brother is going to move into her hotel.
"Not so well I'm afraid I acquire your assistance to make him feel better"
"What? Whats the problem is he ok? Did you hurt him? Alastor I do not care how helpful you are around here if you hurt my little brother-" Her eyes started glowing red as her hair was swept into the air and her horns started to show.
Before this could go any further Alastor cut her off.
"My dear, rest assured I would kill hell's entire population and my self before causing any harm to your darling brother." He said calmly.
"Oh, then whats the problem?" Asked Charlie now calm.
And so Alastor explained everything to Charlie.
When Alastor and Charlie knocked on her father's door there was no answer. They looked at one another and Charlie checked if it was open. It was, so they could go in without problems.
"Hello? Dad?" Yelled Charlie as her voice echoed in the huge mansion.
"YOU, It's your fault you took them away from me" they heard as they looked to their right.
In seconds Alastor was tackled to the floor with a very angry Lucifer on top.
When Charlie registered what she was seeing she started to pull her father off of the Radio demon to almost no avail. The devil wouldn't budge.
"YOU TOOK BOTH OF MY CHILDREN AWAY FROM ME ARE YOU HAPPY NOW IS THAT ENOUGH?"
Lucifer was not happy. He was yelling in his demon form wings out and fire spewing from his mouth.
"DAD"
Everyone stopped. You were standing in the door looking at the scene before you, baffled.
You rarely raised your voice, so to hear it this loud and clear shocked most people in the room.
You cleared your throat. And said in your normal calm voice again.
"Can we talk in private."
Lucifer calmed down and followed you into the room you left to.
When he entered the room to his surprise, you hugged him.
"Listen dad, I understand that both of your kids growing up is hard for you, and I'm sorry for leaving you alone but I need my space I'm starting to live my life and its with Alastor because I love him."
You said in a very gentle tone.
Your dad looked at you for some time then hugged you again.
"You really love him, kiddo?" He looked at you with understanding eyes as he let go.
"I do, dad I really do." You answered.
Your dad sighed. He took a hold of your hands.
"All that matters to me is that you are happy. I'm sorry I have been such a jerk about it but...it's so hard to let you kids go, you will always be my babies" He sniffed lightly.
You chuckled at that and squeezed his hands.
"Can you please make an effort to not hate Alastor?" You tried.
He groaned.
"Yeah, yeah I'll see what I can do but he needs to be cooperative"
You walked out of the room.
Charlie stood up with tears in her eyes and hugged you both.
"Oh...the walls are thin here aren't they?" You asked as you looked at your dad.
"Yeaaah, forgot to mention that."
"You guys, I'm so happy you made up are we ok now?" She asked between sniffles.
"Yeah, we are ok" you smiled at your dad.
After your sister let you go from her crushing embrace Alastor walked up to you.
"I- listen no pressure about saying-" he cut you off by swapping you off your feet into a breathtaking kiss.
"I...I love you too, darling" he said quietly, without the radio statics, he said it in his real voice, as he put his forehead on yours.
"OK, see, I promised to be nice but there is no need to rub it in my face" your father said as he dragged you away.
Alastor straightened up and, with the static back in his voice and an eye twitching, he held his hand out to your father.
"I promise to make an effort to not murder you" he smiled eerily at your dad.
Lucifer had a brooding expression on his face but shook the radio demons hand none the less.
"Thank you." You said at last as you hugged both of them. They hugged you back. While glaring at each other behind your back.
Sure they are gonna make an effort. When you're looking.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TADA
I really hope you like it again thank you for the request.
Also please let me know if y'all want any of what I mentioned in the beginning.
When Alastor's staff broke and he started talking w/o the statics I was ON MY KNEES.
I WANNA THANK EVERY SINGLE ON OF YOU WHO LIKE MY STORIES THEY HAVE RECEIVED A LOT OF LOVE AND IM THANKFUL BEYOND IMAGINATION THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU💗💗
OK LOVE YOU HAVE A NICE DAY/NIGHT/MORNING WHATEVER MWUAH💋
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imtryingbuck · 8 months
Text
Affair
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~ gif not mine credit to owner ~
Affair
Summary: Y/n founds out about her husband’s affair.
Word count: 1207
Warnings: Angst, Bucky is not good in this im sorry. Sad yet strong reader. Infidelity. Sharon and Steve. Little teeny tiny bit of body hate. Swear words.
A/n: there’s a line from my favourite song of Adeles.
Masterlist
Part 2
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The day she found out her husband was having an affair it felt like time had stopped. Thousands of questions sworn inside her head, she didn’t blame her husband or the other woman nope she blamed herself. It was her fault her husband was unfaithful, it was her fault she had not been enough for him, it was her fault for not satisfying his needs. It was her fault. 
After the self-blaming and self-hating she moved on to anger. Angry at her husband betraying her, angry at the other woman - a woman she had called a friend for 15 years - angry at herself, just unadulterated anger. 
Then came the self-pity party, where all she did was cry and cry and cry. She would stand in front of the full body mirror just in her underwear, picking at every single detail on her skin hating what she saw in the reflection. Then she would cry even more due to the fact that after finally loving and being kind to her own body, she was back to hating it. However, she didn’t just feel sorry for herself, no, no she felt sorry for her husband, her children, her husband’s mistress and the husband of her husband’s mistress.
Oh and then there was denial - but that went straight out of her head pretty quickly, after all she did catch them going at it with her own two eyes.
And finally came acceptance. She accepted her husband’s extra marital affair, she accepted that she had been betrayed by two people close to her. Completely aware that her marriage was over and dead.
Her heart remained broken though, that would never change.
~~~
The sound of the door opening use to bring a smile on Y/ns face, sending her straight to the door awaiting him like a goddamn lapdog. Now though all it did was make her wonder which excuse she was going to be given. 
Sitting on the sofa with her knees pulled up staring at the tv screen, chuckling quietly to herself as Peter Griffin continues his antics, wondering to herself why Lois puts up with him. Already smelling the mistress’s perfume on him makes her roll her eyes. 
“Hey bab-“
“I filed for divorce.”
He actually has the audacity to act shocked “w-what do you mean? Bab-“
“Stop. Just stop. I know about your affair, I know you’ve been sleeping with Sharon for the past six months, probably longer I don’t know” mumbling the last part quietly “but all that matters is that I know so now we’re getting divorced.”
She sees him in her peripheral nervously shifting foot to foot, colour completely drained from his face, is that tears? Gross. Before he can even get a good enough excuse for his betrayal straight, she continues.
“Don’t say anything it’s not going to change my mind or decision. I spoke with my lawyer who thinks I’m being to kind - his words not mine - anyway I told him in don’t want money or the house from you. Custody will be split between us evenly” standing up wrapping her arms around herself “you know at first I wanted so many answers but now I just want to know one thing, do you think you can be honest for once? Do you actually think Sharon is going to want you know that I’m leaving you? Think you both can run off into the sunset and live happily ever after?” Using a baby like voice at the end she chuckles at his expression, she can’t tell if it’s heartbreak that she’s leaving him or heartbreak that his mistress isn’t going to want him anymore - laughable. 
“The answer is no by the way. I feel bad though, you both deserve each other. Both so wrapped up in your own selflessness that you were happy to ruin two marriages, two families! To betray, lie and deceive your spouses who happen to be friends! All for what? Sex?” Stepping back when he tries to reach out “don’t fucking touch me! Don’t you dare try and touch me AFTER you’ve been with her! What the actual fuck is wrong with you? And don’t you dare stand there and cry! You did this, you both did. Oh and Steve knows” Literally as she said that his phone started ringing “Go ahead and answer it’s probably your best friend or your mistress, go ahead James and answer” at the sound of his first name he flinched, he pulled his phone out and sighed, declining the call he looked back at the woman who he had the privilege of calling his wife. The mother of his children, the woman who he has loved from the moment he was introduced to her. The woman who he cheated on.
“I’m sorry” is all he could say, he really didn’t remember how the affair started or why on earth he continued it, he has this perfect wife at home, his other half his soulmate and he cheated, he couldn’t even give her a good enough excuse. His guilt was hitting like a ton of bricks, he betrayed his wife and his best friend all for a quick fuck that wasn’t even good.
“You’re sorry? I’m sorry too. I’m sorry that when the morning comes, you’re going to have no one. I feel for you James honestly - stop swaying you’re making me feel seasick, sit down.” Watching him sit on the chair she moves to sit where she was originally sat before.
“Listen I just want to get this off my chest before I go to bed okay, I have loved you so deeply that I honestly don’t think I’d ever stop loving you but James I can’t forgive you, maybe one day in the future I will but not right now. I have been stood by your side through every single thing that has happened to you, and yet you betray me. I don’t know what went wrong with us but whatever I did I’m sorry-“ when he tries to intervene she puts her hand up “Just listen! I’m sorry that our story has ended this way but i can’t trust you anymore or even stand the sight of you if I’m being honest. You have given me something that I can't live without, you mustn't underestimate that when you are in doubt. But this is where our story ends.” 
Wiping her tears with the sleeve of her jumper, she stands up stronger and taller than ever before. 
“You can sleep on the sofa or head to Sharon’s I know Steve said he’d be staying with Sam and Nat. Tomorrow I’ll be taking the kids to our new house and then I guess we’ll go from there” Shrugging her shoulders as she doesn’t know what else to say to him. “Goodnight James, I truly hope you all the best”
Once in the comfort of her bedroom she listens to hear his movements but all she can hear are his cries. Smiling sadly, she climbs into the bed, she fears the unknowing of what her future holds whilst also excited for it.
For the first time since she found out about her husband’s affair she sleeps peacefully.
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~ banners credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~
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tastesousweet · 2 months
Text
⭒ the girl with the tattoo (viii) - pt 1 pt 2 p3 p4 p5 p6 p7
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matt sturniolo x fem!oc / reader
summary : the triplets' birthday party is a perfect place for flirting, tension, and... well, matt and y/n's forte.
warnings : use of alcohol, weed and smut ( just a lil flithy icl ), beware that the word count on this ho is crazy - meaning i did not proofread!
mickey speaks : this took a MINUTE to get out im sawrryyyy. i tried to fit everything into one part and ended up rewriting almost the entire part last minute (which is most of the reason why this is very delayed), sooo hope you love??? bc i dont lmfao also the triplets r a couple yrs older in this (turning 23)
THIS IS PART EIGHT GO READ THE OTHERS FIRST!!!
"JESUS, matt. can you take this seriously, please?" chris scoffs, taking the dry-erase marker cap from its awkward spot between his teeth.
matt's not one to continue adding his opinion knowing it won't be listened to. he prefers to leave the impossible-to-get-a-word-in debating to nick and chris who have no problem yelling over each other to the point that they don't even know what the issue ever was.
so he's found comfort in sitting at the dining room table with his eyes firmly closed and arms used as a pillow for his head, leaving nothing but a dollop of his hair to be shown, or as he told chris "attempting to find peace for myself while living with you chaotic fucks."
"what could you possibly want from me?" matt asks without moving from his face down position, voice muffled and strained.
"i want you to fight for your opinion! don't you care about what we do for our birthday?!" chris stresses while nick rolls his eyes and falls into a bored stance, leaning against the dark marble counter.
matt finally raises his head causing his face to scrunch up and eyes to squint due to the sudden and bright change in lighting, "no? i actually don't give a shit, chris."
chris first feels the instigator within him sighing in defeat only for his pride to take center. he figures if nick has practically given up and matt cares so little, that gives him all of the creative action for birthday plans. exactly what he wanted.
his lips form a tight line to hide his satisfaction as he shakes his head slowly, unevenly wiping his hand across the magnetic white board (that he used to write the many ideas thrown around in his head, mistakenly thinking a visual would narrow things down for him and nick). “‘kay. then i’m getting nate to help plan us a house party and it'll be fucking perfect. because i care.”
౨ৎ
you've never been so grateful of your front door's placement this close to the kitchen. but carrying three cake boxes and a tote bag the size of your torso, desperately needing to put them down after traveling up three flights of stairs, will surely be the task that brings that gratitude out of you.
though when you arrive, your scrunched eyebrows and pouted lips are an apparent contrast to the enthusiastic vibe of your kitchen- with andrea moving her hips to the lines of spanish dancing in the air, waiting patiently for the sizzling indication of her fried egg's tenderness, and the use of pink lemonade-colored towels or handles on utensils (that made you and andrea way too happy during one of your first target runs as roommates) scattered around.
drea finally notices you when your metal keychain clanks against the countertop, "y/n!" her excitement slightly dulls with her widened eyes when she gets a better view of your face, turning the stove off and coming closer to hug you. "hi, good morning-ish. are you feeling okay? ...or, like, sad?" you silently accept her gesture and tuck your head in her neck while she caresses your hair with a sigh, "or both at the same time...?"
your response is a breathy sigh and pause before the words tumble out, "m'fine, i think. just overestimated myself a little with staying up so late." you remove your head from her neck and move backwards to lean against the countertop, fanning your hands to create a much needed breeze, "and i'm so hot, it's making me feel gross."
andrea peers into the clear plastic cutout on top of one of the boxes, "at least the cakes look nice."
a week ago you set your mind on gifting the triplets their own cakes for their birthday (thinking that sharing a day was already enough, no way would you want them to have to share and agree on only one cake). you easily gathered their cake preferences by sneaking it into any random conversations you'd have with each of them.
and after a week of planning and preparing, was it so bad if you wanted a fun night in with your roomie? andrea warned you several times to go to bed considering you'd be up at 5:30 the next morning, but you insisted that you'd be fine and asked her to help you clear the rest of the box-wine in the fridge.
you could tell matt was a little irritated that you chose rewatching episodes of a sitcom and "cheap ass box-wine" over sex with him (of course throwing the fact that his birthday would be arriving in only a few hours right in your face) but you pioneered and assured him that you'll make time for him the next day, while also sweetly reminding him that you too have a life outside of this exchange.
at midnight you sent the triplets a group message to congratulate. and a few minutes later you left andrea on the couch for your room, sending matt a birthday text of his own (because you did feel the tiniest bit guilty for rejecting him earlier) paired with a picture with your shirt lifted, hem tucked behind your teeth, and your boobs sat in a sheer bra with decorative white trimming and a bow in the center.
he didn't respond for almost an hour and you tried to not feel embarrassed or overthink his reaction at all.
you couldn't stand the giddiness that came over you (you'd blame it on being the slightest bit tipsy) when you finally got into bed to find his response gentle, in his own matt-kind-of-way, with your image loved and a grayed bubble text reading: "Very pretty, thank you"
"thanks, drea. they were a bitch to make." water drowns out your voice as you start to wash your hands in the deep sink. you run your soapy fingers over a small cut you got when dealing with an irritating cardboard box earlier, finding the stinging of the hot water a wonderful kind of bitter that further plays into your foul mood.
"mmm... i'm sure. but it's not like you can even tell. they almost look store-bought," she attempts to flatter you, turning her head from the packaged desserts to offer a smile.
when you're sweet you're the most ripe, juicy peach, eveyone knows this. but god, when you're feeling down you really are the most cranky, green apple that could force a pucker onto even the most undaunted. your face is dragged of any aloofness or sunshine with your dry response as she turns to resume her breakfast, "uh huh. you don't have to coddle me. i'll get over myself soon, i promise." you dry your hands.
andrea would argue she's not coddling only looking out for your well being- because she wants to and knows if she were neglecting her needs you'd be right on her ass as well, "okay...and did you eat?"
"just like, a bagel before i left," you open the fridge and let the door hang open as you walk across the kitchen to grab the cake boxes and set them inside. you make sure to mind your feet, noticing figaro nosily has his furry face lifted to sniff into the side door.
she strings some sarcasm into her sentiment, "oh yum." she pauses, letting the sizzle of the egg and (now faint) music linger in the air before she speaks again, "how about you go take a shower or do something that'll make you feel a little better?"
"you know i would but being around my favorite roommate is already making me feel sooo much better!" you deliver the dry joke with a smile and pick up figaro when you shut the fridge door with an accidental slam.
she turns to look at you over her shoulder as she grabs two glass plates for the both of you, scolding you like a mother (as she tended to transform into at times like this due to her essentially parenting her younger siblings) "y/n, you're only fighting yourself, go ahead now."
౨ৎ
matt can hear chris' voice only grow louder and pound against the hallway walls but assumes he is heading anywhere but the space that matt's in, deciding to continue brushing his teeth instead.
he'd only be so lucky on his birthday.
"but yeah-" chris interrupts himself to knock and barely wait for an answer before he walks into matt's sleek bathroom. "matt's here!" his phone is carelessly thrown in front of matt's face (with a frothing mouth and irritated eyes) before he has truly registered anything that has happened.
he truly wants to roll his eyes infinitely but when he sees his mother is the one on the phone, his grumpy front is quickly wilted and a glimmer kisses his spirit in a way only she could produce.
it's clear she hadn't expected matt to be in the middle of something as personal as brushing his teeth when she first sees him, "oh, hi matt!" she understands him well enough to know he absolutely hates this (this being chris unnecessarily close to him as he hunches over to keep matt's face in the camera) so she attempts to amuse him, "wow, you're really showing your age now, aren't you? just looking so put together and nice." she laughs to herself as matt tries to not smile whilst brushing, holding his index finger up to indicate that he would address her with words in only a moment.
"chris, honey, why'd you bring me to your brother when he's busy, anyway?! now we're just watchin' him brush his teeth and the angles you're givin' me are so awkward," she emphasizes her sentence as it goes on.
chris turns the phone back to himself, "because you told me to show him?!"
"no, i said 'where's matt?'" she corrects him in jest.
"okay, so am i incorrect in saying that there was an implication-?"
matt dries his face with a towel and grabs the phone scolding chris, "hey we get it, smartass-" he turns to look at her again with a smile, "sorry mom."
"mhm," she dismisses, "when's this party of yours starting?"
"soon i think," matt moves around chris to exit the bathroom, leaving chris (literally) in the dark.
"okay and how's your birthday been so far?" he smiles knowing how excited she's always been about these things.
"good, i don't feel any different. just doin' the same stuff, except today there's way more people sending me texts and pretending the care about me." matt places the phone against a bowl full of chips in the kitchen, waving when he notices chris followed him.
"get down here nick, mom's on the phone!" chris yells, coming into frame and leaning on the counter. "jeez, matt's masochism can't give any of us a break even on days literally made for our happiness. you hearin' this kid ma?"
matt shakes his head, pointing to chris with his handful of chips, "spell masochism."
chris' eyes pinch and before their mother or chris himself reply, nick is running over to them with a smile and yell of "im heree!!"
she's has the much-expected motherly urge to cry seeing her three sons (whom she rarely sees anymore) all in the same frame, "aw, hi nicky! just look at you boys...so sweet."
it only takes another second before she's crumbling in tears. their smiles drop as chris grabs his phone. they all begin spilling out the most comforting phrases they know to cheer her up.
౨ৎ
"okay people! cake is coming through! everyone move. move, move...precious cargo right here and your ass is in the way!" asha yells and shines her phone's flashlight into the faces in the crowded living room as she ushers the girls to the kitchen.
she earns a few glares that she happily dishes back and a few mumbles of "bitch" once she's walked past that has remi "accidentally" stepping on a certain people's shoes while following asha's lead.
the modern open kitchen hosts plenty of drinks and snacks as well as a worried nathan, who's shirt is barely on his torso from the amount of buttons he's undone since stepping foot in the wild space. "oh thank god the cake's are here," he sighs with a throw of his head before frantically moving a platter of chips and guac (that someone was actively eating from) and a few six packs from the island to the opposite counter, encouraging the girls to place them down with an awkward nod of his head and harsh blink of his eyes.
asha holds back a laugh at nate's odd vibe as she moves next to him, nudging his shoulder, "what's wrong with you?"
"nothing," his head whips to look at her, "well, i mean, think 'm just nervous." he starts slow but it seems he needed someone to finally prompt him to share such a frustrated rant, "like- chris comes to me and asks me to throw him the best party. yet he doesn't give me shit to work with besides his home to host it in-" he breathes, "and 'm feelin' all the pressure of planning a party right now but, you know, i just need things to go smooth and then i'll be fine..." he runs a hand through his hair, "you ladies don't worry about me." he fakes a smile and gives a small wave of his wrist to show just how "fine" he is.
coinciding with nate's rant, you've began to pour a hefty amount of vodka and lemon juice (you absolutely scoured the fridge for) into a large glass. you hand it off to andrea with a pleading "mix" as you lick the remaining lemon juice from your thumb and open cabinets to search for shot glasses.
you line up a multitude of shot glasses with various cities labeled on them as andrea pours the mixture in carefully. you immediately bring one up to nathan, "lemon drop?"
"yes, please. no way your a fucking bartender and baker?" nate's eyes widen as he receives the small glass.
"no, definitely not. just live with a girl whois always making her own drinks at home," you smile and grab your own glass as the rest of the girls follow suit.
"i need this right now," remi starts, "let's cheers to drea's DIY shit and nathan making it through the rest of the night!" she woops and the group all let out various chuckles.
"a-fuckin'-men!" nate leans to clink the small glasses softly before taking the shot quickly. he barely recovers from the shot before he's pouring more vodka into his glass and taking a second.
you get the best view of chris turning the corner and seeing you all (his reaction is more specifically for andrea) have arrived. his jaw hangs dramatically as he walks over but quickly turns to a big smile when the group all start to sing happy birthday to him. "stop it! stop it!" he jokes and begins to give out hugs and thank each of you for coming. he stops and squeezes you extra tight, bringing up the cakes sat nearby, "i know that bakery anywhere. thank you for my cake."
"of course, i had to," you smile.
"no seriously, you're fuckin' awesome, girl." you can tell he's already a little buzzed from the look in his eyes but you also know he's almost more truthful than ever when drunk.
you notice that when he leaves you to finally greet your roommate, it's very clear he's purposely left andrea last to ensure there would be no rush on his interaction.
the rest of the group leave them to their own world for a moment; as the two hug chris gives her a soft kiss on her forehead, whispering "hi, mi cariña (my darling)" an inside joke between the two of them as chris' struggle with speaking spanish never fails to make andrea laugh.
౨ৎ
"okay, okay, i'll do it," matt finally gives in, lifting himself off of the black couch with people piled on top of it. he hands his drink over to elijah smoothly and begins to playfully rub his hands together.
"'hold my beer' headass," elijah jokes placing the cup off on a side table next to him. matt stops any movement, turning his torso to look back at the boy and start to laugh while holding both middle fingers up.
"matt," erin taps him with the side of her arm twice to get his attention again, handing him the second wii remote in her hands. the screen appears extra bright in contrast to the dimness of the room which causes matt to wonder how the fuck anyone has managed to play just dance in this space without getting a sudden head rush or worse.
"okay, let's do timber because it's classic," she suggests.
"let's not," matt opposes, his hand covering his mouth to hide a grin before running his cursor over the other choices.
erin looks over to him with a blank expression, "i mean i don't care that much you can-"
"'m joking, we'll do timber," matt looks from her to the colorful screen to find the song once more.
when he notices she's stiil looking over at him with an unreadable expression, matt smiles big attempting to not laugh, causing his already-slim eyes to pinch a little extra as he turns to her, "hey e, the screen's right up there, you won't be getting much direction from starin' at me-" he breaks into obnoxious laughter mid-way through his sentence which earns him a small smack on the arm.
erin laughs a little now, "would you stop it? just click 'a' on your fucking remote."
he does as she says and looks to her as the screen loads, "thereee we go, you can cool down now, sweetheart."
as the two dance both matt and his friends make one-off comments and jokes about the many times matt almost fell (and would make sure to blame it on the rug or his shoes). they seem to be having such a great time that you don't know if you only being there for the final few lines of the song, watching erin ride matt's back as they spin in circles laughing, is fortunate or unfortunate.
the claps and whistles are wild when the two finish with a bow, the crowd around them only getting louder when matt teases that he's so hot he might have to take off his shirt, lifting it slightly then putting it back down and calling them pervs. you only shake your head and bite back a smile, hating how fucking charming he is when he allows himself to be completely lost in a good time.
matt would say you snuck onto the sectional couch- because a minute ago you weren't there and now here you are talking elijah's ear off and taking repeated hits of his blunt.
but you wouldn't say you snuck into his area, rather walked in a manner in which you'd be out of his and erin's way- of course not taking away from the birthday boy and his...good friend. so you're a bit surprised he slumps on the couch next to you and not in his original spot on the opposite side of eli, "sunnnyy," he huffs and leans his head back against the couch, "when'd you get here, huh?"
you turn to look at him and he smiles at you then looks up to the ceiling, "think an hour ago? maybe?" you hand him the blunt.
"cool, cool, cool..." matt repeats cutting himself off by placing it in his mouth. he's dressed so stylish and attractive you can't help but scan over him with your eyes; his jersey-style shirt showing off his armfuls of tattoos, baggy jeans, car keys hanging on a cheetah print clip attached to his belt loop, shoes that look straight out of the box, a matching hat that you honestly wish he'd take off, and his signature silver jewelry brightening his attributes in the otherwise dark room.
he makes the slightest "tsss" sound when breathing in the drug before speaking with smoke plummeting from his mouth, "you should dance next," he brings it back to his mouth for a final hit.
"mmm maybe...if lucas is up for it," you play with the metal can of a wine cooler that you hold on your bare knee as matt leans over you to hand an occupied eli his blunt back, his laugh trails smoke out of his mouth and into your face as he slouches back next to you.
"forgot you're fuckin, hilarious! holy shit." his hand makes its way up his own shirt to rest on his stomach as he giggles.
a smile grows on your face, "no seriously is he here?" you lift yourself up a little and pretend to look for the familiar face.
"stop that." matt chuckles and tugs your wrist gently. you almost get nervous this time when you look him in the eyes. when he's drunk, matt is so carefree and giggly in a way you rarely get to see. and now you’re starting to notice how the poor lighting makes his features appear arched and his face look carved into, yet the jagged becomes soft and fuzzy whenever the gumdrop-colored lights of the wii game hit his face with the beat of the song. he notices your staring and lets go of your wrist, "what's up?"
"nothing."
"excuse me everyone! i would like to give a speech! hello, i am giving a speechhh! everyone shut up, please!" nick projects his voice into the microphone- he stole from the karaoke machine -while standing on a dining room chair.
as people start to calm down nick speaks, "right, so, it's my fuckin' birthday!” he raises his arms and dances his fingers before pointing out matt, “and it's matt's fuckin' birthday, right over there! let's get some flashlights pointing over to my brother please!" matt’s face flushes as he covers his eyes from the sudden bright lights. you squint your own eyes from next to him and move closer to eli to avoid the flashes.
"and it's chris' fuckin' birthday..." nick looks around, "i couldn't tell you where exactly he is, just know that he is also here tonight!” the crowd roars, “anyway... i'm so- so happy to have you all with us tonight to celebrate. we turn twenty fucking three and... that feels so old saying it out loud. holy shit." nick cringes obnoxiously, slurring his next few words, "but i love my two best friends in the whole world: chris and matt, i wouldn’t wish to share a birthday with anyone else… and i love all of you thank you again. oh! and shout out nathan for holding this shit down! if you see nathan give him something... i don't know- money? a kiss? a drink? fuck if i know." as nick speaks cameron nudges him with a shot glass which he finally acknowledges, "and apparently this is a toast now so, you know, here's to getting older and having the most fun forever!" he raises the glass in the air and drinks it without further thought, inviting everyone to do the same while cheering and applauding him in excitement.
you raise your wine cooler and let out many cheers along with the rest, but of course matt ridicules you a little in jest, "really? you sit here and 'woo' while i'm going blind?!" he’s still wiping at his eyes, dealing with the aftermath of bright lights shining in his eyes; his vision tainted with faint blue and red splotches only for a second. you lean closer to him, attempting to see his eyes better while uncontrollably laughing.
"are you crying?!"
matt thinks you look really pretty even when you're quite literally pointing and laughing in his face. you move his hands away from his face and he widens his eyes dramatically, "look, no 'm not!” you shake your head in response, “does really it look like it?"
you notice his bottom eyelashes are slightly clumped and you move your hand closer, placing your thumb under his eye, "baby, that's damp!" you giggle and pull his hand close, using your thumb to draw a wet line across his tattooed wrist to prove your point.
he drags out his first word, "alrighttt. whatever! you got me, sweet girl. ‘cause god forbid i have the ability to cry?!” pulling away from you with a smile as he dries his eyes by rubbing them gently.
matt excuses himself with a quick "gonna go grab another drink or somethin'" before he does something irrational like kiss you in front of all these fucking people.
౨ৎ
you carefully open each of the packaged cakes, each revealing the boys' full names written in cursive with the uniquely styled and colored buttercream frosting you made that very morning. you used the same shades to make the puffed frosting border of the cakes, for an easy, soft garnish. remi follows behind you, lighting candles on the cakes as you go.
there's a chaos that comes with trying to gather this many (drunk) people in one area and capture their attention long enough to sing then cut cakes. it doesn’t help that the hosts are at their most unserious themselves; matt and nick both snickering and making jokes while holding onto each other while chris talks to one of his friends off to the side with his obnoxiously loud voice without regard for anyone around him.
“okay, people we’re singing!” nathan attempts to yell over the loudness of the crowded room. you and remi are then in the position of getting the attention of the birthday boys who can’t focus on the task at hand, leaving you both to snap your fingers and call them as if you were attempting to take photos of a stubborn baby.
you truly wish it didn’t irk you so terribly but you can’t help your annoyance when matt looks over to erin after she shouts from next to you, “matt, can you pay attention? your cake’s ready,” and he listens, moving nick off of him with a shoulder nudge and laugh as he approaches the row of cakes.
you recover quickly with a smile once both matt and nick’s eyes widen and mouths hang open in awe of your hard work, “s’perfect,” matt whispers to himself, now adjusting his hat to fit backwards.
“oh my god, the wax got in my cake! what the fuck,” nick whines and that cues drea to tug chris’ arm softly and urge him with a hushed, “chris ven aquí (come here)!”
and he's is down so terribly that he moves to where she wants him immediately.
chris is a known sap, especially when wasted, so he’s stood fighting the urge to cry when taking in the scene in front of him: his brothers and friends gathered together to celebrate their twenty three years of life together.
he tucks his lip into his mouth and looks down at the burning flame, slowly smiling when everyone around them begin to sing a rendition of happy birthday with all the charmingly bad high notes and run on “you”s but not forgetting to crunch all three names into a single line.
midway through the song, chris leans to hug matt in comfort while sneaking a reach into matt’s back pocket to grab the slim joint he just knew would be there. he grins to himself, “sweet! free j and free light,” placing it into his mouth as he leans over his cake to spark the joint hanging in his mouth with as much precision as possible. andrea shakes her head in confusion while filming on her phone beside to you.
“dude,” matt lets out a breathy laugh while waving his hand to clear the atmosphere of the potent smoke. sudden applause recognizing the end of the song and leading the three to blow out their candles.
matt gave up on birthday wishes a while into his teen years and nothing changes this year; he blows his candles out and claps along with the crowd before accepting his joint from chris for a few puffs of celebration.
you watch in amusement as nathan distracts the boys with shots to get them away from the cakes as andrea begins to cut. except no shot could beat the view of andrea bent over the counter like she is now, so chris is practically on top of drea with annoying whines of “i wanna see,” when she asks him to be careful and wait a second.
you, however, are actively searching for the spiked punch that elijah recommended when you run into erin and matt talking. they both look to you with different expressions as you squeeze yourself by them to get to the punch bowl.
you remind yourself that erin is your friend, not your enemy. nor your competition. meaning you also have to remind yourself that matt is some guy you fuck around with, not your boyfriend.
you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding in while grabbing a plastic cup and using a small ladle to pour the peach colored liquid for yourself. instead of flat-out staring at the two, you take turns looking from them to your cup. you watch as they pose for a picture; erin taking his hat to place on her own head and matt smiling next to her. and another with her kissing his cheek as he laughs.
it’s upsetting- no, humiliating to you. and how especially humiliating that your first thought is whether he’ll dismiss you for erin when you ask him to fuck you later tonight? you blame the weed for getting you so worked up over minutiae interactions.
you’re brought out of your daze in the most humbling of ways: a sudden splash hits your bare foot and covers your black kitten heels in the sticky juice. “fuck,” you groan and place the ladle back into the punch bowl, taking a large sip of your overflowing drink as you look down at the puddle of pink you’re standing in.
you find a towel laying nearby and lower yourself to fumble and wipe your shoe.
“damn y/n, you like my punch that much?” a voice asks from next to you.
you look up and see lucas smiling down at you, “you made it?” you ask genuinely as he helps you rise to standing again.
“no,” he smiles and you roll your eyes, “but im wondering how you managed to spill any with this itty bitty fucking ladle?” he jokes, lifting the ladle and watching it pour the small bit of juice it managed to gather back into the bowl.
“i just wasn’t paying attention,” you laugh and sip your drink again.
“mhm…why’s that?” he squints his eyes down at you.
you tap two of your french tip fingernails against your skull, “so much is happening up here.”
“like what?”
“i don’t knowww,” you smirk and look away to take another sip of your drink.
“well, i know you look sexy as fuck in this dress right now. look at you,” he wets his lips and offers his hand to you with a grin, showing off a few of his shining tooth gems.
you try to maintain your composure and not smile too big but it’s a challenge when he playfully gets you to spin slowly for him and show off the tiny strapless dress you have on as he “oouu”s and whistles to hype you up.
“mm, you like that?” you look up at him, blinking slowly.
he nods and chuckles, “you know damn well-” looking off to the side then gaining your eye contact once more as he wipes over his mouth with his hand, glancing over your body, “‘course i do.”
"good. we should dance then," you guide him to the living room with his hand still in yours.
౨ৎ
you hate to be the bitch on her phone at a party but you can’t stop staring at it. you tap past the story then go back to look again. you even rewatch it in the perspective of someone who hadn’t been there to see the photo taken to see how it would be perceived. hurting your own feelings knowing they could very well assume matt to be erin’s boyfriend with how close they’re standing and her lips against his face.
it’s very dizzying and ruining your high quite a bit, especially paired with andrea who continues to look to you to celebrate after every ping pong ball she throws whether she makes it or not.
you go to rewatch the story once more, only this time a text from matt slides down on your screen to interrupt your sulking:
MATT
Hey come here
Y/N
where???
MATT
Outside youll see me
you let andrea know you’re going outside for air before walking over to a glass sliding door to let yourself out.
you see matt holding a stick while looking down at his phone, fire pit radiating next to him, a mass of people surrounding it.
your arms wrap and hold onto your shoulders as you walk closer, feeling the breeze rack through your body despite the internal heat from the many drinks you've had over the course of the night.
as you approach, asha gets up from her spot on nick's lap to give you a hug, "y/n! hiii." she pulls away and her hands remain on your shoulders, "your cake was so delicious, i tried a bite of each."
"oh good, 'm glad." you smile.
she feels your hands, "are you cold, babe? come sit." she guides you over to the group of people sat around the fire. "you can take my spot, i'll stand," she insists and nick agrees smiling kindly.
you interrupt matt's texting to figure out why he wanted you here, cupping your hands to shout, "matt!" across the lawn from your spot atop nick.
he looks over and quips his head while moving closer, "hey, was just wonderin' if you'd try my s'more? nick thinks he makes them best." he smiles but you can't help but feel that there's a catch to this.
"always gotta prove someone wrong. yeah, i'll do it." you agree as he moves to grab the snack he'd apparently already prepared.
nick mutters, "don't let him bully you into liking his, and don't forget who's acting as your chair currently!" from behind you as you giggle into the bite that matt gives you, holding the smore in his hand up to your mouth.
you chew slowly and matt watches, chatter and crinkles of the fire filling the heated space. you finally nod your head and matt smirks, "so good, right?" matt asks and brings his hand to hold your face and wipe around the corner of your mouth, looking to his right with a smile then back to you.
you feel awkwardly and unnaturally sensual, moving his hand away from your face and searching for what he's looked over to, catching the eye of lucas, standing with a group of guys lighting up near a fence. so that is the fucking catch.
you lick your lips of any remaining marshmallow and shake your head, annoyed, "i don't know, it tastes normal and graham cracker is fucking stale." you look up at him and his face is adorned with confusion on your change of heart.
you feel too fucking weird about this. you wish you couldn't believe that he'd use your feelings towards him for some weird shit like claiming you from lucas, but it's not surprising in the slightest; matt wants his cake yet he'll always want to eat it too.
"yeah, nick wins." you pat the side of nick's thigh to grab his attention and tell him the news, making him cheer and bring you into his chest for a small hug.
matt's lips form the smallest pucker as he watches you get up and walk towards the house without further conversation.
"bye, y/n!" asha yells.
౨ৎ
matt lays flat on his bed, staring up at the ceiling to try and organize his many thoughts when his door creaks slightly, allowing a roar of party chatter into his space before it shuts again.
he lifts only his head up to see erin stood with a small smile before letting himself fall back into his plush comforter, "hey, i got your shit in the first drawer over there." he points to a tall dresser across the room.
he listens to her shuffle around before finding a large bag of weed, coming close to him and placing a few folded bills in his front pocket slowly. she then moves so that she hovers over his dazed face, "thank you, are you sure you don't need anything else from me? it is your birthday..." she grins and runs a hand over his chest. he mimics her smile (intended in more of a mocking way than she takes it) and laughs softly.
"no, i'm good on that, e. you enjoy your doobies and shit," he continues to softly laugh, eyes crinkling at the sides before she thanks him again and gives him a small peck.
"happy birthday, matty!" she sings before closing the door to his room and heading straight to his bathroom next door to pee.
matt would say it hasn't even been four minutes since erin left him when you're stumbling into his room. he repeats his look up, only to soften a bit when he sees you make effort to move some of his shoes out of the walkway so that you don't trip, "hi, baby" he waves you over with his fingers and welcomes you as if you'll be staying for long, "lock that door for me." he figures if you came to see him after storming away like that at the fire pit you're either gonna spit your thoughts in his face or sit on his face, there's no in between.
"i found you," you smile and twist the smaller knob to lock the door from the rowdiness. you then make your way over to sit at the end of his bed and begin to fiddle with the straps on your tiny heels, "my feet have been achin' so bad," you look at him as you complain.
"mm, i'm sure."
when your feet are finally free from your shoes you place them on the ground and adjust yourself on the bed. you silently grimace seeing matt with his shoes remaining on his feet despite being on his bed.
he giggles when you begin to unlace them, "feel like a fuckin' princess."
you roll your eyes and begin to pull them off, "with the way you act you might as well be one."
"ouch? it's my birthday," he holds his heart while looking to you playfully.
you tilt your head and drop his second shoe right on the floor as you stare back at him, "oh, i know."
"right. what's wrong now?"
you run your hands along his legs as you inch up his body and hover yourself over his crotch, "nothing. everything's fine, right?" you adjust your hair away from your face.
"sure, uh huh," matt looks up at you and bites his lower lip while moving his hands to hold and squeeze your full thighs. he silently admires the way you fill that tiny dress and look down at him from this angle.
you look away for a moment then decide to put your full weight onto matt, muffled groan leaving his mouth. your lips curve up as you pull his bottom lip from his mouth with your thumb to replace it with your mouth, sucking and kissing it. your tongue runs over his lips a few times before matt takes hold of your head and pulls you impossibly closer to capture your mouth messily with his own.
the kiss is a filthy, drunken sight: noses meshing and colliding, tongues playing and licking, and moans escaping and ringing into the air desperately.
you pull away with a wet smack and whisper into his lips, "i've got another present for you..."
"mmm?" his eyes widen and he squeezes your neck gently, kissing you once more, "for real? like, more than this?!" his hand feathers over your ass, insinuating the way you're sat on top of him right now could easily be his best gift tonight.
"yes," you breathe then begin to giggle, "you're gonna lose your shit, i think."
his mind can think of a lot of things you could do to make him lose his shit, "damn, okay. well, show me. you got my stomach dancin' and shit." he holds you so that you stay put as he lifts himself to rest on his elbows.
your smile bites over your bottom lip now as you raise yourself from his lap once more. your nail taps against your upper thigh as you look down at him, "kiss, please?"
he doesn't have to move much, as your leg is already so close to his face. he keeps heated eye contact with you when he kisses and marks the skin you'd point to, causing small mindless noises to fall from your mouth as you play with his soft hair (that you unfortunately hadn't seen much of tonight).
when he's finished he looks up to you with his red, puffy eyes and wet lips as you thank him, "now...pay attention." you gently demand as you slowly move your dress up your body.
matt studies your movement in awe, eventually catching your gift in his line of sight. he knows you must think you're so sneaky when you only show a glimmer of your lacy white panties, with a cursive red "M" embroidered near the waistband, before quickly pushing your dress back down with an uncontrollable laugh.
matt's face morphs to express a million different emotions and he doesn't realize how loud his voice is when he speaks, "what the fuck?!" he looks up at you- with your head thrown back laughing -then back to your covered lower half. "what was that? hold the fuck on," you body is so loose with laughter that he easily grabs you and flips you onto the bed so that you lay underneath him, still squirming in your own giggles (yelling a few "matt!"s or "matt wait i can't breathe!"s).
his face is full of amusement when he firmly lifts your dress to get a better look at what you've done for him. "oh my god, 'm gonna pass the fuck out. look at you, sunny!" he rubs his eyes dramatically and shakes his head. "no, you're so bad."
"you like it?" you ask, licking over your lips and reaching your hands up to trace the small hairs prickling on matt's jawline.
"course i do, the fuck type of question is that?!" he turns his face to kiss your inner palm before bending closer to kiss your lips once more.
"happy birthday, matt." you say in between kisses, "there's somethin' else if you look a little more."
"really?" he immediately splits from you and looks to your panties once more, running his hands over your lower stomach. the cherry red joint laying against your hip and tucked into your underwear catches him by surprise but the stoner in him nearly cums on the spot.
he removes it from it's place and kisses you mumbling a reminder that "you're so hot" and "the marijuana bug must've bit you real bad" before he gets up to store it in his bedside table, patting the closed drawer and joking, "for when i miss you."
he stands above you for an extra second to shake his head slowly with a tut, but when you whine "c'mereee," he's hushing you and removing his shirt before crawling back on top of you.
your hands run across every inch of his warm torso as you both sloppily kiss, and matt's own hands curiously make their way into your underwear for a proper feel of your wet core.
he allows you to desperately grind your hips against his hand until he eventually decides he needs to taste you. he lowers himself to face your clothed pussy, tracing the "M" with a finger as he places his tongue flat against you and places pressure on your most sensitive area.
his finger once tracing, now moves to pull the tiny piece of fabric off of you. he looks into your eyes as he easily stuffs the cloth in his back pocket, mumbling "mine now" while moving his fingers through your sticky folds.
you cry out when he dips two fingers into you teasingly, over and over again, and another series of moans leaves your mouth when he begins to lick over your clit eagerly.
matt continues his efforts, spitting on your clit a few times to watch it drip down to where his fingers harshly move inside of you; his movements quickening while he watches.
and just before you cum you dumbly warn him, which makes him stop entirely. "no, matt. stop, please come back. please."
"shhh. don't start that shit, you'll cum twice on your day..." he unbuttons his pants, "plus, you know it feels so much better when you wait and have to chase it a few times." he smirks and nudges your clit with his finger once more making you breathe out a moan and close your legs around his hand.
he pulls away from you to finish undressing before laying back dowm in his tight boxers, "come take care of me, sunny. i need you."
"hm...and i needed you too..." you lift yourself up and pout as you climb off the bed and get closer to where he lies, turning and moving your hair away for your back, "unzip me, please?"
he does just as you say and watches you finish removing your dress in only one movement. when you climb on top of him he now gets a view of your tits directly in his face that has him humming and immediately feeling you up.
he kisses and licks the skin while you scratch at his scalp in the most sensual way. you reach behind you to dip your hand into his boxers, immediately coming in contact with his sensitive and slightly sticky tip. he tilts his head back with a groan as soon as you begin to stroke him beneath the fabric making a sinical smile form on your face.
you push the boxers further down his thighs to fully expose him as you bring your lips down to him again. his moans flow into your mouth when you repeatedly rush your movements then slowly circle his head.
eventually matt's eyebrows pinch in terribly tight and he grabs your hand, sighing, "god damn, baby. chill or i'll be cummin' before i'm inside you."
you roll your eyes playfully, "okay?" as you adjust yourself to align over his length, before sinking down on top of him.
"mmm, fuck." he encourages when you lift yourself and slam back down on top of him. you move his hands to hold your hips then spread your hands over his chest as you continue.
matt can't help but slap your ass a few times after discovering the way your muscles flutter around him so perfectly each time. but one smack in particular aids you to practically fall onto his chest whining, "matt i can't, please just-."
he immediately lifts your face to give him a much needed kiss before reaching to realign himself and hold onto you as he thrusts rhythmically into you.
moans sneak from your mouth and interrupt you from kissing and holding onto matt's neck, which only encourage matt until he's completely flustered and drilling into you sloppily.
matt can tell you're cumming by your all too and familiar broken moans. and once you harshly kiss him and ask him to let go in return he finally stills inside of you and groans into your soft shoulder.
a silence coats the room, leaving the overpowering music and talking of the party to linger through the air in a cloudy murmur.
matt keeps his arms around you while you recover from your high, staring at the ceiling of his faintly lit room in questionable thought.
and he assumes you must be doing the same; only he mistakes the wetness of your tears for his own sweat as you turn your head away from him to dissolve your embarrassingly shaky breaths.
꩜⋆ ˚。⋆🎱˚
tag list is in the replies ily!!!!
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factual-fantasy · 1 month
Note
RRRRRAH IT CANT BE I MISSED AN ASK TO RANT ABOUT HOW MICH I LOVE TUNA NOOOOO
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this has been a week huh? I got sick an all 🫡 BUT
LOUIS HAVING A CRUSH ON ELLIE WOULD BE THE SWEETEST RHING EVERRRRRR
LIKE HE WOULD BE ALL:
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AND SHELL IGNORE HIM BECAUSE HES SO- WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
WOULD HE BE LIKE TOM?? FROM TOM AND JERRY?? WITH THAT ONE FEMALE CAT?? ALL IDIOT AND JALEUS IN AN IDIOT WAY????? IM SO CURIOUSSSSSS
what romantic kind is Luois? The akward one? The winner spirit? The handsome prince? The actually decent? The in denial? The not in any way obvious? The quiet? I feel like he wouldn't say a word, but he'll be obvious (Ellie would see him acting nicely to her and be like: "finally some respect")
If Ellie found out what would she do? Probably nothing if I think of it, maybe she'll be like: "it's a phase, you'll grow our of ir if I'm lucky". She's so done with everyone but fish (he loves the crew but fish are fish)
tell me about them, I know probably Luois is a decent cookie being with his feelings and doesn't do much because "getting attached like this to a coworker isn't that much of a great idea", but tell me PLEAAAASEEEEEE
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRHHHHAAAAAA
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TUNAAAAAA I MISS MY BOY HOW'S HE BEEN DOINGGGGG DID HE ATE? DID HE DRINK? DID HE SLEEP? DID HE WOKE UP FROM A NIGHTMARE OR FROM THE TUNATASTIC DREAM EVER?
I don't know if you have told me before, but how is his relationship with Urchin? She seems like someone he can mess up with and then she'll mess him up way worse (in a sibling way if you get me)
XD hey you can ramble on about how much you love Tuna whenever! There's no set time XDD and I'm sorry to hear that you've been sick. :( I hope you feel better soon! :}
As for Louis and Ellie, I haven't really thought it through a whole lot.. would Ellie feel the same way? What kind of romantic is Louis? I'm not sure of much of that.. but this ask did give me a drawing idea. XD
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Perhaps Louis is very confident and charismatic in most areas of his life. But when he's met with romantic interest in a woman? And being unsure if said woman feels the same?? Suddenly he's shaking in his boots and keeping his feelings locked up all over again. It's probably a similar situation to Blue and Seafoam. He's unsure if Ellie feels the same and doesn't want to risk damaging or altering their current friendship.
And don't be mistaken about Ellie. She isn't heartless or cold, her body language is just hard to read! She really is a sweetheart and loves her crew to bits. That's why Louis is interested in the first place- he knows that underneath that grumpy exterior she's a real catch. It just so happens that her grumpy exterior makes it hard to tell if she feels the same! <XD
As for Tuna, he's been doing well I'm sure! Eating, drinking, sleeping and all that XD Now his relationship with Urchin.. hmm.. well, Urchin is really chill and easy going. I imagine she has a fair bit of patience to deal with any of Tunas shenanigans. Perhaps they'd be good friends! Especially when Tuna eventually lightens up around the crew :}
Thank you once again for the ask and interest in my ocs!! :DD It makes me heart very happi :}} 💞💞
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crezz-star · 6 months
Note
I can't help but wonder about your One Piece OC! I know you've mentioned that he's a mature person in the crew, but do you see him as more of a sibling/parental role to Luffy, or is he part of the shenanigans with usopp/chopper/luffy, or is he like tired uncle like Jinbei (or secretly amused like zoro) ? I am eager to hear about where he meshes in with crew especially luffy
I also can't help but wonder if our first mate gets jealous of him often. You mentioned that you do, but I think about like what if some days luffy just misses Ace, and luff will stare at Jean a lot more sometimes or just hover around him just to relive being with his brother *cries*
✨Kira kira yoho!✨
Hello!
Ahhh!! Im so happy and excited every time I get question about my OCs (❤´艸`❤) Thank you for taking interest and being curious about Jean!
To answer. He is more of big brother type. Not just to Luffy but to everyone. Even the older mature straw hats. Jean just have so much love to give, growing up not knowing much about the world, isolated and thinking himself to be a slave until death. It really is Luffy and the strawhats who saved him and his fellow slaves so, he's enthusiastic in showing them how much he cares for them. how thankful he is to them for saving him, and along with that, his life. So he spoils everyone like this cool doting brother.
I'm actually planning to make one paged comic series ( kind of like 4 koma? ) in his interactions with the strawhats. As well as discovering more of the world. little sneak peek with Sanji ( ignore the cross. i changed that to a locket )
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Here, Jean becomes the big brother Sanji dreamed and should have had. At first it annoys Sanji to no end even saying stuff like " gross, dont touch me. its weird! " but Jean is so gentle towards the crew, even helping Sanji wash the dishes, even cleaning the kitchen at night to surprise Sanji that eventually, Sanji accepts Jean. And finally allows himself to be spoiled. Even bringing out that side of Sanji that longs for a caring brother. One he only dreamed back then.
Jean has that ability to let everyone's hidden side of wanting to be spoiled and Jean is all to happy to do so. He is just so happy to be there with everyone. That he never really asks for anything in return.
--------------
As for Zoro being made Jealous by Jean. Yes he does that. but there is a moment only the three of them knows. Its when Luffy gets nightmares about Ace every now and then. most of the time he can deal with it, but there are times he's so shaken. When Jean wasn't around yet, it's Zoro trying to calm him down. But when jean arrived, the three of them found out that, despite being freaked out by jean and Ace looking alike, Jean helps Luffy calm down due to his voice being exactly like Ace's. Along with it, Jean's hugs is just one of the best. Even beating hugs from Jinbei. There's a strange therapeutic effect.
Here is a comic I doodled quickly just now to show that.
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I still wanted to emphasize the eerie feeling from Jean and Ace's similarities are so the comic ended up a bit off. (laughs) please forgive me!
Every time this happens, Luffy does apologize to Jean for asking him to 'talk' like Ace. He knows it's wrong, but honestly, Jean would do anything to calm Luffy. and He knows Luffy doesn't mean it and that he's just suffering, So Jean is very patient with him and never really feels offended at all.
And that is all the answers I have!
Thank you for being interested in Jean!! 💖💖
✨Have a sparkling day!✨
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diqnbaus · 11 months
Text
Let You Break My Heart Again (Part 2)
Paring: Miles Morales x fem!reader
Summary: Your attempts to avoid Miles have worked. Until it’s time for his dad’s promotion party. That’s it lowkey. The next part will have more I promise. This is also at the beginning of ATSV so you’ve been warned.
Category: Not sad but not happy??
A/n: im soryr im so tired and I wasn’t even planning on writing another part but I felt badly. Also ik think chapter isnt as good as the first but I’ve rewritten in three thousand times and have two drafts. This is the one I like more.
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No matter how upset you were, no matter hard you tried to ignore Miles; there was no getting out of this. You had to go to Miles’ dad’s promotion party. Worst case scenario, you saw Miles and he tried to talk to you again. Best case scenario, you don’t see him and get free pizza from the party.
Either way, you were going. After all, you were mad at Miles. Not his dad.
So that was how you found yourself here, on the roof that was filled with people you didn’t know, trying to fit as much free food onto your plate while simultaneously trying to avoid eye contact with anyone who might start a conversation.
Unfortunately, you were unsuccessful in your attempts. Mrs. Morales soon approached you, just as you were stuffing your face with one of the cookies from your plate.
“I know the cookies are good, but please don’t choke,” Mrs. Morales says, smiling softly.
“Mhsis Mowawwes,” you swallow the cookie before trying again. “Mrs. Morales! This party is wonderful, and so are the cookies, obviously.”
“Thank you, I bought them myself,” she chuckles. “Have you seen Miles anywhere? He was supposed to be here ten minutes ago. He has the cake.”
“The cake? That’s the most important part of a party. No I haven’t seen him, sorry.”
She sighs, “that’s okay. That boy is always late to everything. I need to start telling him to get there twenty minutes before they actually start, then maybe he’d be on time.”
“Maybe you’ll only have to tell him to get there,” you check your watch, “thirteen minutes before it starts. He’s walking in right now.”
“Ugh, y/n you’re a lifesaver! I’m going to talk some sense into that boy,” she says while heading in his direction.
“Yep,” you mumble to yourself before eating another cookie and finding a quieter corner that you could sit in.
Your peacefulness didn’t last long, as after the fight Miles had with his parents, they went to find you.
“Y/n! Just the person we needed!” Mr. Davis said as they approached you.
“We were wondering if you would go talk to Miles. I’m sure you heard what happened earlier,” Mrs. Morales said.
“It was kind of hard not to,” Mr. Davis mumbled.
Ignoring her husband, she continued, “We really think something is bothering him, and he won’t talk to us. So maybe he would talk to you?”
“Oh I don’t really know, he didn’t really seem in the mood to talk to anyone,” you reply awkwardly, trying to get out of the conversation. The aforementioned worst case scenario was upon you.
“Please? It would double as my promotion present; as you didn’t get me one,” Mr. David said, confrontationally.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know I had to get you one,” you replied, panicked.
“I’ll only forgive you if you go talk to Miles,” he says sweetly before his wife turns him around and harshly whispers to him. Something about “manipulating” and “poor girl,” while you just sat there confused.
Finally when they turned back toward you, you told them you would do it.
“Thank you so much y/n,” Mrs. Morales says while ushering you towards the exit of the roof.
“Yes, thank you. The door should be unlocked. But if it isn’t, there’s a spare key under the mat,” Mr. Davis says as you reach the exit.
“That’s not very safe,” you reply, a little unnerved. You have to talk to Miles about that later. Maybe. If you felt like it.
“Oh please! I’m not the police chief yet, I can still be a little crazy now and then. Plus I change up the spot every other year, so we should be fine,” he says, ushering you out the door.
“Thanks again!” They say in unison, just before the door closes. You sigh before making your way down the many stairs, to the apartment.
Sure enough, the door is unlocked. But just to make sure he wasn’t joking, you checked under the mat and found the key. Huffing, you stand back up and make your way into the apartment towards Miles’ room.
“Miles! We need to talk about a few things. Starting with your dad’s key placement…” you trail off after opening the door to Miles’ room to see him and Gwen looking at his shelf full of his ‘action figures.’ This was the worser case scenario. Worster? Worsest? It doesn’t matter. This was bad.
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buckyalpine · 1 year
Note
Hi! I hope you feel better soon 💜 I have funny lil request if you are at all interested. So Bucky has a lil crush on the reader, and one day walks by their room and hears something that makes him a bit jealous. He hears the reader giggling, and saying stuff jokingly like "Stop Charlie, that tickles!" or "You're so handsome," and Bucky becomes sad because he thinks the reader has found someone. But then he later finds out that the reader was actually dog sitting for a friend. What happens next is up to you, and feel free to change anything to make it more interesting! I chose Charlie as a random dog name that's also human, but its just an example. If you find any inspiration from this, I encourage you to take it in absolutely any direction you want! (as long as it has a happy ending, bc Im a sucker for happy endings hehe)
okay what I find hilarious and amazing about this is I HAVE HAD THIS EXAAACT SAME IDEA, WHY DID I NEVER WRITE IT. THIS IS SO ADORABLE. This is a sign. From the universe.
The only thing I'm changing here is the name because I find it hilarious when dogs have more common people names. 
It started off with your sweet smiles, they’re so contagious, he can’t help but smile back. He starts to find his heart jumping a little whenever you’re around, he almost goes to Bruce to get a medical check up cause why is his heart doing that. Stop that. He can’t control the way you make him blush and he realizes he likes you. Likes you likes you. Its a cute little crush he has that he tries to keep a secret because its just a little crush, nothing to get worked up over. 
He’s too scared to ask you out, he gets tongue tied the second he tries to attempt anything. 
It all goes sideways he walks by your room one day. 
"Daniel, bubba you're too heavy to be lying on me like this!"
He stopped dead in his tracks. Maybe he heard wrong. 
"Baby, stop that tickles"
Baby? You never mentioned dating anyone before.
"Hey! You can't get away with that just because you're so handsome"
Bucky blinked, his jaw clenching, who the fuck was this Daniel, and why he with you. He wanted to know exactly how “handsome” this punk was, making you giggle and laugh, he should be the one doing that. 
"Hmmm, you know you're so handsome don't you baby"
Bucky shook his head, huffing to his room to pout, he had to find out who the hell this guy was. Or not. If was sure he’d probably punch the guy in the neck. 
Imagine his surprise when he over hears the team just casually talking to you about Daniel. 
With Sam
Sam: So how's Daniel doing? You: He's good, I'm going to see him later today if I have some time, we might go for a walk in the park
Sam: Aww, the weather’s supposed to be nice out, maybe you can even stop by the lake!
With Tony
You: Daniel's coming over later, is that okay?
Tony: Sure, just don't make a mess in the living room like last time
You: Sorry, I'll keep him in check
Tony: He’s great otherwise, you should bring him around more often
Bucky nearly saw stars with that conversation, the last thing he needed was more of you and Daniel. The final straw was when he heard you talking to Steve. 
Steve: You think I can steal Daniel from you
You: I’m sure he’d love that, he loves going on runs with you, I can’t keep up with his energy 
Steve: He’s great, wish he was around more often, let me know when he’s coming by next
Okay, stealing his crush was one thing, but Bucky drew the boundary at this clown moving in on his best friend too. 
*****
“Can you tell me what the hell is so great about Daniel” Bucky huffed, fidgeting with his fingers, sitting on the couch while Sam tinkered with redwing. 
“What do you mean what’s so great, he’s amazing! He’s friendly, he’s great with kids, he’s super sweet, gets along with everyone. You haven’t met him?” 
“No” Bucky rolled his eyes, every time he thought it was bad, it got worse. Now the guy was great with kids too. Fantastic. Before Sam could respond, Bucky hear you call for him. 
“Oh my God Bucky!! You have to meet Daniel!” You ran up to him, bouncing on your feet. Every time Daniel had come by, Bucky had either been called away on a mission or busy with something. You’d been dying for him to meet your favorite baby in the whole world. 
“I was busy y/n” Bucky tried to sound grumpy but he just couldn’t with you, pouting like a kicked puppy instead. He might as well meet the guy that seemed to have your heart. 
“You were just sitting with Sam, please?” You gave him your best pout and Bucky melted instantly, nodding while you ran back again to show your favorite soldier your best fur baby. 
Bucky’s eyes widened at the massive golden retriever that came bounding in, immediately pouncing on him and attacking him with kisses. 
“Daniel!!” You tried to pull him off but he wasn’t having it, trying to snuggle himself into Bucky, keeping him pinned on the floor. “Baby, get off him, I told you you’re too big!”
“This-this is Daniel?” Bucky blinked between getting his face licked, too stunned to say much else
“Yeah! Why, who did you think it was” 
“Your boyfriend” Sam snorted, watching the scene unfold in front of him, wiggling his eye brows at Bucky. 
“I-no-” Bucky blushed, while sitting up slightly, petting the fluffy baby behind the ears, allowing him to sit in his lap. 
“Man, shut up, just admit you were jealous over y/n 4 legged boyfriend” 
“Did you think Daniel was my boyfriend?” you giggled, sitting down beside him, your heart beating a little faster when he bit his lip. Did he like you back? “Were you jealous?” you whispered, inching a little closer to him, while he smiled softly not meeting your eyes. 
“Maybe a little” 
You both inched closer and closer until your hand was brushing his, his fingers hesitantly intertwining with yours while Daniel happily made himself comfortable across your laps, his head resting on Bucky’s thigh. Tony and Steve entered the living room looking pleased when they saw how close the two of you were sitting. 
“Ah, I see you met y/n’s boyfriend” Tony snorted while Bucky groaned, covering his face. “Cheating on Daniel now are we?” He nodded at your hand in Bucky’s while you laughed, kissing his cheek, making him blush more. 
“Hmm, Bucky doesn’t mind a little competition” 
“I hate all of you” 
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luveline · 11 months
Note
if you’re ever in the mood to write for kbd again i’d love to ask for an argument fic! i’m a huge hurt/comfort fan and i feel like the arguments you write always feel so realistic and healthy(?) in a way? ily
thank you for your request! im glad u like how i write arguments bcos i find it so difficult, I hope this fills your hurt/comfort needs! kbd | dad!steve x mom!reader
You're tapping your foot on the kitchen floor, annoyed and upset and not sure if you should say anything about it. 
Dove said her first words today. And you found out through Avery, who sits on the kitchen table in front of you with her legs dancing over the edge, clearly unhappy that you're unhappy, her hands stroking your cheeks affectionately. She's only six. You feel terrible that she can tell you're upset. 
"Mom, how can I make you happy?" she asks.
It's something you've said to her a thousand times. She cries, and she's finally at the age where you can ask her what solution she needs. 
You love her, but your patience isn't very strong today. You remove her hands from your face gently and give her a weak smile. 
"I just need to talk to daddy, that's all." 
"I'll go get him!" she says, clambering onto your legs and down onto the ground. 
You don't really like the idea of summoning him for a scolding, and you've been with him long enough to know how to navigate a disagreement without a fuss. But you aren't perfect, and neither is he. When he arrives in the kitchen with a broken baby doll in his hands, he looks so comely, so homespun, and you're still mad. 
"Why didn't you tell me Dove said her first words?" 
His eyes light up, but he swiftly fixes his expression into a more neutral one. "I– sorry, yeah, she said daddy." He grins like he can't help it. He probably can't. "Oh, you should've heard it, she couldn't have sounded less excited to say it, what a doll." 
"But why didn't you tell me?" 
Steve seems to clock where this is heading, then, and puts the doll down on the kitchen counter. "It slipped my mind." 
"Really? Her very first words slipped your mind? Like, that's not extremely important to you?" 
"Of course it's important to me." Steve's eyes narrow, and his eyebrows start to rise. It's not an angry look nor is it cruel, but it rubs you the wrong way. It's sceptical. "But I'm busy all of the time. Which you know."
You're getting more and more irate. It's not his fault, but it feels like his fault in the moment, and you don't like how he's talking to you, and your head hurts. 
"I didn't say you're not busy, but I still think you should've told me when I came in."
"I just– I don't know, I had to give Bethie a bath, and then Dove was fussing. And now her doll's broken. I was busy." 
You sigh. "Sometimes," you say, more depressed than mad, "you act like they're not even mine. You act like they're just your girls. I'm their mom." 
"Do I do that?" he asks, incredulity leaching into his words.
"Steve, you should've told me straight away. She's my baby, I should've found out from you, and not Avery, like an afterthought." 
"I told you, I forgot." 
"I don't care if you forgot– actually, I do, because that's the problem. You shouldn't forget to tell me when my own daughter starts talking–" 
"You're acting like I chose not to tell you. I wasn't not going to tell you, but I have other things on mind! I have a lot to do, in case you forgot!" 
"Like I'm not busy too?" you ask. "Like I don't work all day every day to come home to you. To make sure there's a home to come home to." 
"You're throwing that in my face?" he asks, crossing his arms over his chest.
"No! No, I'm just saying that I'm busy too, you're not the only one who has to do things, Steve, but the difference is that I would never forget to tell you something like that!" 
"Maybe if you were home, you wouldn't need to shout at me about it. You feel guilty and you're taking it out on me." 
You don't see red or anything so aggressive —no. You just feel like he's slapped you, like he's reached right into the centre of your chest and said the thing that's going to hurt you the most. 
You don't want to cry. You know how it looks, like you're losing, so you're crying, so he'll feel sorry and make you feel better. Steve has known you and loved you for years and he knows the look on your face before tears have even welled up. You twist away from him and cover your face with your hands, your skin hot as a burning hearth. 
And the tears are pathetic. Sniffling, quiet, high-pitched in the back of your throat. It's not fair. It's not fair, you want to stay home too, you want to see their first moments, and you don't get to do it and he's shouting at you and you just want to shrink into nothing right then and there. You're tired, and you're embarrassed at yourself for speaking to him like that. He doesn't deserve it.
"Honey," Steve says, all malice gone. "Honey, don't. It's okay." 
"I'm fine." 
"No, it's okay," he says, putting his hand on your shoulder. 
"Ignore me," you say, "I'm not crying to– I'm just mad." 
"Don't cry," he murmurs, pressing his lips to your crown. "Don't. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry." 
Love is so unfortunate, sometimes. He's the only one who you want comfort from, but you're so mad at him. Even if he's right. The anger is as illogical as the love; you want him to go away and you need him to rub your back as you snuffle. 
"It's not fair, Steve. You can't just say that."
"I know. I'm sorry. I know you can't be home. I know I'm the lucky one. I know how much you've given away to let me have what I want," he says, moving so he's face to face with you. 
"Now you'll think I'm crying just to be the one upset," you say with a sob. 
"Only a little bit." He laughs fondly at your frown. "I'm kidding!"
You cry so much he has to wrap his arms around you to keep you together. It's not his fault, but suddenly everything breaks the surface, how guilty you feel for missing out, how annoyed you are at him for knowing that and still giving you a hard time, how annoyed you are at yourself for shouting at him over something he can't control. You cry because you miss the girls, you miss him, and you're tired. There's hundreds of tiny reasons. 
Steve sounds a little emotional himself when he says, "God, I'm sorry." His cheek pressed hard to your ear, his hug tightening. "I'm a dick, making you cry." 
"I'm a dick. I'm sorry," you say, head heavy, tears slowed. 
"It's okay. I know why you're upset. I promise I know. I shouldn't have got so defensive… but I really did forget, honey. I'm sorry, but I did." 
"I know. I'm sorry for being a bitch about it." 
He laughs and pulls back to cup your cheek. "You are not a bitch. You got upset, you're not the antichrist." 
You sniff. Steve pulls the corner of your mouth into an uneven smile and then, slowly, leans in to dot a kiss there. When he moves back, his face is slack. An unhappiness lingers in his lips and his eyes where they're trained on your tacky cheek. 
He moves in for a second kiss. This one is firmer, longer, and you reciprocate with relief. 
"Do you really think that? That I act like they're just my girls?" he asks when he pulls away. 
You duck your head so you don't have to look at him, or face the mean things you'd said. Not just mean, either, but the things you're embarrassed to have thought. 
"Not really. Sometimes I feel like…" You don't want to say it aloud. You rub the skin of his wrist in a fidget. 
"Go on," he says. 
"I worry I'm not choosing the right thing. I would never ask you to give this up… I really wouldn't. But I worry I'll regret not being here."  
Steve wraps his hands in your t-shirt and pulls it toward him. You're becoming more and more intertwined as the conversation progresses, your faces much too close. 
"We've always said," he says slowly, "that you could change your mind. That you could come home, and that I would work. We've always said that. You don't have to be afraid to tell me you've been thinking about it." 
"I haven't." You sniff. "I don't even think I could do it." 
"Are you kidding?" Steve asks. 
A rogue tear races down your cheek. If you speak, you'll sob, so you shake your head and hold onto his wrist for dear life. 
"You're the best mom they ever made," he says, easing closer still, his face imploring, pleading with you, "why would you ever think you can't do it? It’s different to when you’re home, being alone with them, it's fucking hard, and I think you'd struggle to get used to it at first because I still struggle now, but you could do it. I know you could. You could stay at home and look after them if you want to, I want you to do that if it's what you need." 
"This is silly," you say. 
"It's not silly." 
"I've made this all about me. I was angry at you and now you're comforting me." You stroke his cheek with your knuckle. "I'm the one who should be comforting you. You race after the kids all day and then the wife comes home and grabs you by the ear."
"I think I'd kinda like it if you did," he says. 
You both laugh. 
"I'm sorry," you say. 
Steve nods. "Yeah, me too." 
You bite back everything that's hurting. It's only a temporary pain. You'll figure out what you want, and you have your best friend in the world kneeling in front of you, willing to do anything if it'll help. 
"I should be nicer to you," you murmur. 
"You're plenty nice. But if you're still feeling guilty, I'd die for a kiss, sweetheart." 
You wipe your face with your sleeves, wet cheeks, snotty nose, and brush your hair away so you look like someone worth kissing. "Do I look okay?" 
"You look beautiful," Steve says fondly, leaning in for a kiss. His hands bracelet your wrists. "So pretty," he says between kisses. 
"Don't," you chastise lightly, "this is why I keep getting knocked up." 
"In that case," he says against your lips. He deepens the kiss against your charmed laughter, his hand sliding to the back of your neck, holding you still in the face of his ardency. 
You part before things can get heated and he lets you apologise again, though he insists it isn't necessary, your arms over his shoulders, your nose in his hair. He's always been so good like that —Steve doesn't hold a grudge with you (though others may not be so lucky). He stands you up, brushes you down, even wipes your cheeks with a washcloth. It's why you could never send him to work. He's a caretaker down to the bone. 
Bethie, sweet girl as she is, appears as he's wiping your puffy eyes. She's almost three and a half, and she's the cutest girl in existence if Steve is to be believed. He visibly softens at her entrance alone. 
"Hello, Bethie-baby," he says, "we were wondering where you were. Did you finish your crackers?" 
She's a daddy's girl and she always has been, so it surprises you when she pretty much ignores him and holds her hands up to you. You pick her up, let her settle against your chest. 
"Hey, Beth." 
"Missed you," she says. 
"Oh, you did?" you ask, overjoyed. You sniffle the last of your upset away and lock it down tight. 
She's a quiet baby. You worried she had developmental issues at first (which wouldn't have mattered in terms of love, but worried all the same), though these days your theory is that she doesn't want to speak very much. She likes to communicate in other ways, namely affection, and her face brushes yours as she hugs you. 
You pat her back like she knows she likes. Steve smiles at you from over his shoulders. You wear twin expressions —I'm sorry, I love you, isn't she lovely?
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