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slow-motionlovepotion · 1 year

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𝒅𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒄𝒂𝒕𝒆 | 𝒋.𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒓

𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈: Joel Miller x f!Reader

𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕: 4.6K - this was not meant to be this long, oops.

𝒂/𝒏: I'm feral for Joel Miller and I won't apologise for that. This ended up so much softer than I planned but Joel Miller deserves to be loved, goddmit. part two is already in progress ~ no beta, we die like men

𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: 18+ - smut, post-apocalypse, pre-Ellie, age gap (mid/late 20s!reader x early 40s!Joel), first time, loss of virginity, fingering, oral (f!receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it kids), Joel Miller has a big dick, risky creampie, multiple orgasms, dirty talk, manhandling, angst, implications of rape (does not involve reader or Joel), soft!Joel, fluff, idiots in love, innocence kink, Joel Miller is down bad. - minors do not interact.

𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚: Sometimes when I look into your eyes, I pretend you're mine, all the damn time

Joel had found you cowering in the corner of a store in some godforsaken town somewhere in deep Texas, the twitching body of an infected splayed in front of you. He’d eyed you cautiously, keeping his distance, gun pointed directly at you, not afraid to pull the trigger.

“No, please, no. I’m okay, I’m fine, not bitten. I promise. Please” you were frantic, begging for your life.

“Just the one?” He’d asked, voice gruff and dark, he exuded danger.

You nodded “It was out the back, I checked but I didn’t see it, then it just came out of nowhere”

He nods once “You alone?”

“Yeah, it’s just me” you hadn’t moved from your spot on the floor, hands raised in surrender, shaking in fear.

“Christ” the man mutters more to himself than to you, giving you the once over he lowers the gun “C’mon, I’m not leaving you here”

Your time together was meant to be brief, Joel had planned to find you somewhere safe to stay, people you could live your life with, some sense of normality. Life would never be like it was before the outbreak but maybe he could find you a new version of living.

It took two months to find the first group of settlers but Joel didn’t even let you near them, he’d checked them out alone, swiftly deciding it wasn’t a safe place for you, he didn’t say why. Another six months until the next group, they initially seemed better but the cries echoing outside the commune at night told Joel all he needed to know.

It’s been exactly 2 years since he found you in that abandoned store, you’d managed to survive for six months, barely, living in a constant state of fight or flight. And then Joel came, Joel who took a chance on you, who shared his supplies and taught you to survive. Joel, who stood watch and let you sleep despite being exhausted himself, who bandaged your wounds, and made his own life harder just to make yours a little bit easier.

Joel, who would watch the world burn just to make sure you were safe.

You could still to this day, pinpoint the exact moment you fell in love with Joel Miller. You watched the world burn. Well not the world, just a decrepit cabin on the side of a road somewhere in Texas. He'd thought it was safe, he’d checked and double checked, the place was free of infected, or so he thought. The thick knit of your scarf was the first thing that saved your life that night, when the infected had come at you from behind, jumping out of the dark and going for your neck. Joel hadn’t even hesitated, gun drawn and a bullet in its skull before you could even cry out for help. He’d reached for you, entwining his fingers with yours as he dragged you out of the building, kicking the cap off a gas canister as he went and throwing a lighter behind him as the door had shut. He pushed you ahead of him, protecting your body from the flames licking at the dry timber frame behind him.

You realised you loved him, were in love with him, laying on the dusty ground, with Joel’s imposing body shielded yours. You felt safe, he was firm behind you, chest heaving with laboured breaths, arms wrapped around you, keeping you close, muttering softly into your ear, “it’s okay, it’s okay, I got ya”.

So by the time you came across the third group you’d become quite the survivor. Joel had taught you to defend yourself, how to shoot a gun, how to actually use a knife, the weak spots of a man. You’d wondered why he was teaching you this, why you needed to know how to break the grasp of hands around your throat, how to use his body weight against him. When you’d stumbled across a group of men, animals really, surrounding a woman on her knees, her sobs echoed in your ears and you’d immediately searched for Joel, hands shaking as you grasped at his arms, eyes wide and terrified, you finally understood.

“They… they. Shit Joel, they were…” He didn’t need you to finish, he knew what they were doing. Within 20 minutes he had you both packed and on the road.

You felt like you’d been walking for weeks, in reality it had only been three days but you were exhausted. You were heading East, Joel had heard about a group of women that had settled just across the state border. You trudged slowly behind Joel, the unseasonable heat making you sweat, boots kicking up dust with every step, lost in your own thoughts.

“What’s bugging you?” Joel’s voice pulled you from your thoughts

“We should’ve helped her,” you confessed. It didn’t sit right, that you just left her there for those men to take what they wanted

“There’s nothing we could’ve done, no guarantee she’d be safe in the next place” he’d explained softly

“Is that why you’ve not left me?” The question slips from your lips before you can stop it.

Joel stops, his eyes meet yours but he doesn’t answer, he can’t, can’t admit that he won’t leave you, can’t admit why he won’t leave you. He can’t admit that he loves you.

Darkness has fallen by the time you reach a safe house, a favour from a friend, he’d said. The house was neat, tidy and clean, if not a bit dusty. Joel clears downstairs first, checks upstairs and calls you up to the bedroom. A small puff of dust is released from the bed as he drops your bags. One bed. There’s two of you and more than one bedroom, but you know he won’t let you out of his sight. He won’t risk it.

“Joel?” you croak, voice trembling as you sit on the end of the bed.

“Hmm?” He’s stood by the dresser opposite the bed, removing his jacket and boots.

“I… there’s something- uhh, shit” you pause, taking a shaky breath “listen, please don’t make a big deal of this but I want you to fuck me”

“Darlin’, I’m not gonna do that” he responds almost immediately, doesn’t give himself time to even think about it, doesn’t let himself indulge in the possibility.

Not that he’s not thought about it, God knows he has. He’s wanted you, wanted to feel your lips on his, feel your nails claw at his back as he takes you. But you never gave any indication you wanted it too, so he stayed respectful, well, as respectful as he could. There’d been nights he’d fisted his cock, your name a whisper on his lips as he came into his hand, while your sleeping body lay just inches away.

“Please” you barely whisper, he goes to speak, to reject you again, but you cut him off, “Joel, please. I don’t- I want it to be you, I don’t want it to be like that” your eyes are pleading, silently begging “please”

“You’ve not…? There’s not been anyone?” He asks tentatively, hoping he’s misunderstood, that you’re not actually asking that of him, he crosses the room, sitting next to you on the end of the bed.

“I’ve been kinda busy, what with the end of the world and all that” you try and make a joke but it falls flat, sobering, shining a light on all the ways your life has been taken away from you, all the experiences you’ve missed out on.

It shouldn’t be him, he knows it shouldn’t, he’s so much older, he’s cruel and ruthless and angry. You deserve something else, soft, gentle, loving. He can’t give you that.

But if he doesn’t, if he says no and doesn’t do this for you, there’s no guarantee the next guy is going to love you, no guarantee that he won’t hurt you. For Joel, that decides it, he can’t give you what you deserve but he can give you something better than what’s out there.

Cautious fingers on his leg startle him out of his thoughts, “Just once, just this once” His agreement doesn’t soothe you, it ignites something, butterflies rolling in your belly; you want this.

You’d seen other men on your travels, the way they treated women, both good and bad. You’d thought, naively, that Joel might be like that too, that Joel might take you to his bed, fuck himself into you then roll over, pretend it never happened. But he never did, always respectful, barely ever touching you unless he had to, you’d shared beds, and bandaged each other up, but he’d never touched, never taken it further. “All right?” He nudges when you don’t respond

You nod tightly and whisper a “thank you”, sitting quietly in awkward silence, you don’t know what to do next, you’ve read books, you knew how to do this before but you didn’t know how to deal with an arrangement like this.

Joel breaks the silence first “Do you want to… tonight or would you rather w-?”

“Tonight,” your response is a bit quick and Joel huffs an almost laugh “tonight is good”

You don’t know how to phrase ‘lets just get it over and done with’ when you’re about to fuck someone for the first time. He stands then, grabbing something from his bag then dropping it to the floor. Liquid sloshes as Joel brings the flask to his lips, drawing in three times, brow furrowed. He hands the flask to you “Drink” and the look in his eyes tells you not to question him.

You take a sip and nearly retch, the taste burning your throat and nose, eyes watering. You hadn’t liked whiskey much before and while it’s rare to find anything else these days, you still hadn’t got used to the taste. You take another sip, stomaching this one better. You hold the flask back out to Joel and he takes another drag before placing it on the dresser with slightly more force than he meant.

In two steps he’s back across the room, his hands finding your face, calloused fingers dragging along the skin of your jaw, bringing you to meet his lips. The kiss is bruising and feverish, hot lips pressing to yours, he licks into your mouth and you moan, it’s sinful and sweet and Joel wants more. He wants to pull more pretty noises from you, wants to hear you scream his name. His cock responds eagerly, hardening in his jeans, he’s not felt desire like this in years, it’s burning through his blood, overwhelming his senses.

Joel stands between your legs, tilting your chin up, bringing a knee to rest on the mattress between your thighs. One of his large hands moves to support your neck, the other tracing the line of your throat, gripping gently. The kiss has grown sloppy, Joel is breathing hard, nipping at your lips. His knee between your legs moves to press into your clothed core and despite the layers of fabric you can feel the heat of his thick thigh, your hips roll, chasing more pleasure and a groan escapes your throat unexpectedly.

Joel’s hand drops from your throat, following the neckline of your shirt, down between your breasts, flicking the buttons open, exposing you to the humid air. He pushes the flannel off your shoulders, taking the straps of your bra with it, reaching behind you to unclasp it, inwardly pleased he managed the first try.

You slide your hands to his waist, dragging his shirt with you, brushing your fingers across bare skin. Your fingers trace the waistband of his jeans but he reaches for your hands, wrapping a large hand around your wrists he pushes you flat, pinning your arms above your head. The other hand joins his knee between your legs, fingers teasing the seam of your jeans.

“You asked me to fuck you,” he pulls a nipple into his mouth, teeth nibbling at the sensitive bud “n’ I will” It may have been a while but it’s really just second nature to him and he feels you shiver beneath him “gonna make you feel good darlin’”

“Joel” Your throat is dry and your voice cracks but it’s enough, his hands reach for the button of your jeans, working them down your legs while his mouth assaults your breasts. You can’t focus, it’s too much, his mouth, hands, the feel of his body, large and imposing over yours. He finally gets your jeans off, discarding them to the floor.

You reach for him, finding the buttons of his shirt, tugging gently but making your intentions clear, he allows your trembling fingers to fumble with the buttons for a minute before helping you, making quick work of the buttons, all but ripping the shirt down his arms, throwing it to the floor behind him before positioning himself between your thighs.

Joel’s hand runs up your outer thigh, fingers digging into the flesh of your bum. He trails kisses over your skin, behind your ear, down your jaw, across each of your breasts, fingers playing with the nipple neglected by his mouth. He moves his head down your exposed torso, tongue tasting the salty sweat on your skin you gasp softly as he reaches the waistband of your underwear, black lace, a little luxury that makes you feel pretty and feminine. He nudges the fabric with his nose, breath ghosting over your skin and you shiver,

“You don’t have to” you whisper into the darkness.

A soft “yeah I do” is mumbled into your skin. He makes quick work of removing your underwear, dragging the lace down your legs and dropping them to the floor in a rather obscene gesture.

His mouth is back on your hips working his way to nuzzle at your folds, leaving open mouthed kisses and grazes of his teeth on your skin. His hands press against the back of your thighs, pushing your knees up to your chest, spreading you wide. Joel’s eyes roll back in his head at the sight of you, pussy glistening in the dim light, the low growl that sounds in his chest shakes the bed and it takes all his restraint to take it slow, make it good for you.

“This all for me?” He rubs his thumb through your folds, gathering your wetness and spreading it up to your clit, circling the little bundle. You look down at him between your spread thighs and nod.

The sound you make when Joel flattens his tongue and licks a stripe up your cunt is unholy, and when he flicks his tongue against your clit you can’t help the way a hand reaches for his hair and tugs, nor can you help the sharp cry of his name.

Languid, is the word you’d use to describe the way Joel works at your cunt. Long, slow, lazy circles around your swollen clit, soft passes over the entrance to your cunt, not giving you more than that for what feels like hours. You catch on, quite quickly, that this is as much for Joel as it is for you, and you think he might be enjoying it the most.

Joel hums around your clit, sucking it into his mouth, and the arch of your back is violent, a stark contrast to Joel’s gentle movements, biting down on the fleshy part of your thumb to muffle your scream.

“Don’t do that” a hand reaches up in the dark to pull your fist from your mouth, “wanna hear you” his breath is hot against your core, tongue lapping at you like a man starved.

You’re hot, skin prickly with a layer of sweat, hips rolling, pushing your soaked pussy into Joel’s face, your clit catching on his nose as he teases your entrance with his tongue.

“Jo-el” your voice is whiny to your own ears and your face heats at the sound “more, please more”

Joel lets out a hum at your request, bringing two thick fingers to slide into you and already you feel the intoxicating spark of your orgasm approaching. Your cunt clenches around his fingers and the feeling shoots straight to his cock.

“I’m gonna cum,” you breathe, your grip in his hair painful even to you. “Fuck, fuck, I’m gonna cum, Joel”

You’re so close that when Joel crooks his fingers and continues his assault on your clit, your orgasm tears through you. You stiffen, hissing a “Yesss”through gritted teeth, hands clawing at the sheets and Joel’s hair.

“‘Atta girl” he coos around your clit “tha’s it baby” The sound of Joel’s voice is muffled by the ringing in your ears and when you open your eyes all you can see is stars, flashes of white clouding your vision.

Sensing his movement, you open your eyes and when they’ve adjusted to the darkness again, you can see the burly outline of Joel kneeling between your legs, his eyes drag down your body, fingers of his left hand gently caressing the bend of your knee. You sit up, reaching for his belt, tugging at the buckle. Joel watches as you pull his belt free, fingers ghosting over his length confined in the denim as you pull down the zip.

When your fingers dip inside to grasp him he can’t stop the choked “fuck” that escapes his throat. Pulling him free of his boxers, your jaw drops at the size, fuck he’s thick, so thick, and swaying heavily between his legs, dripping with precum. With hesitant fingers you run the pad of your thumb down his slit, smearing the fluid, stopping to rub your thumb on the underside of his head. Joel can’t help the jerky twitch of his hips at the stimulation. You take that as a positive, repeating the action once, twice more, before calloused hands still your movements. You look up to Joel, confusion clear on your face.

“Won’t last if you keep that up” Joel explains, his voice a whisper, vulnerability evident even in his low tone.

You release his length from your grasp, bringing your thumb coated in his arousal to your mouth, sucking tentatively. You don’t notice Joel watching you through hooded eyes, but he makes quick work of his jeans and boxers, kicking the offending fabric off as quick as his aching bones will let him.

Experienced hands lift your legs to hook over his hips as he settles himself between your thighs again. You can feel the thick length of Joel’s cock pressed firmly against you, sliding through the wetness left by his mouth and your orgasm as he ruts against you. It takes the entirety of Joel’s willpower to not fuck into you, coming back to himself, he remembers why he’s doing this.

“Gotta tell me if y’need to stop” he slurs against your temple and he feels you nod as he presses a soft kiss to your clammy skin. Joel rests the heavy weight of his cock against your entrance, running the head between your folds, bumping your clit and soaking himself with your wetness. He presses himself in to your tight heat and you feel like you’re being split open, wincing at the burn “I know, ‘m sorry darlin’, it won’t hurt for long promise”

Joel pushes your sweat-damp hair out of your face, big hands cupping your face, open mouth dragging against yours. He tries to distract you with wet kisses to your jaw but when he pushes himself deeper you cry out, hands flying to claw at his hips, stopping him from moving any further.

“We can stop” Joel mutters into your open mouth but you give a quick shake of your head

“No. I’m okay, I’ll be okay” The feeling is foreign, neither his fingers or tongue could’ve prepared you for the stretch of his cock, nor the desperate ache that settled deep inside you, the one you know only Joel can satisfy.

You can feel him throbbing inside you, and it’s taking everything in him to hold still

“Eyes on me darlin’” Joel orders as he pries your hand off his hip, entwines his fingers with yours, and pins your hand to the mattress. Your eyes meet through the darkness and there’s a softness in Joel’s eyes you wish you could bottle and keep.

You tense up in anticipation of Joel’s next movement, squeezing your cunt around Joel’s cock

“Fuckin’ Christ darlin’, y’gotta relax, just relax” you will your body to relax, to release the squeezing of your core, “that’s it, doin’ so good, you’re doin’ so good. Takin me so well” and yes, you keen at his praise, the throb of arousal in your stretched cunt is heavenly and Joel takes your moment of distraction to sink the rest of his length into you.

“Fuck” you whimper, the sharp stretch shocks you, eyes widening.

He shudders a breath above you, “‘m sorry, ‘m so sorry”

“So big Joel. ‘T hurts” you practically sob and the sound breaks his heart in ways he didn’t expect. Joel breaks eye contact first, fixing his eyes on where you’re currently impaled on his cock. He moves to pull out but you tighten your thighs, keeping him still “No, don’t. Don’t wanna stop. Just give me a minute” you close your eyes and breath in deep through your nose, letting a shaky breath out.

“Touch yourself,” Joel orders, bringing your hand still clutching his to his mouth, wetting your fingers with his tongue before pressing your fingers against your clit “‘t’ll make you feel better”

You obey, stroking your bundle of nerves, still sensitive from your previous orgasm “that feel good?” He asks as you tighten involuntarily around him.

“Yes,” you pause for a moment, continuing to stroke at your clit. Warmth blooms under your fingers, arousal spreading through your body, loosening your muscles, the discomfort subsides, leaving behind a different kind of ache “can you move? Please”

The way you ask him, with your pleases and thank yous, still so polite despite the harsh world you live in, it’s innocent and sweet, and he loves it. It activates something primal in him, some deep desire to protect you, to please you. To pleasure you.

Joel settles his knees wide on the mattress, pulling his cock from your depths before pushing back in slowly, when you don’t stop him he repeats the action. “shit darlin’, so fuckin’ tight”, and he’s not wrong, the girth of his cock is stretching you in ways you’ve never been before, you can feel every vein, every ridge, every goddamn fucking inch as he works himself in and out of you. It’s steady, controlled, almost gentle, the way he rolls his hips, leaving enough space between you for your fingers to continue working your clit, not that you need the distraction anymore.

He could cum right there, your aching cunt absolute bliss around him. The whine that leaves your throat is of pleasure not pain and the tightness in his chest borders on uncomfortable. He’s done this before, he’s experienced, he’s had women screaming his name but nothing compares to the breathy sound of his name leaving your lips. You’re so sweet, eyes fluttering, fingers ghosting across the skin of his hips, the softness of his belly, the firm muscles of his chest and his broad shoulders.

You could pretend, wrapped up in Joel like this, that it’s not the end of the world, that this comfy bed in this nicely decorated house is yours and Joel’s. You pretend, just for a minute, as he’s fucking himself into you, that he’s yours. Your hands reaching to wrap around his back, nails scratching at the muscles working beneath the skin, it’s intimate.

You feel his pace falter, “‘m close darlin’” he mumbles into the thick air above you, “fuck, y’gotta come for me baby, come on” it sounds like he’s begging and you find that you quite like the sound of Joel begging, especially when he’s begging you to cum for him.

He can see you’re close, legs twitching, breathing heavy, he can feel the tell-tale flutters in your cunt and he knows “what d’ya need?” He pants, chasing your high, no care or regard for his own anymore, he just wants you to get there.

“Joel, I need mo-” he drives himself into you deeper, tilting his hips to rub his cock against your sweet spot. With fluttering eyes and heaving chest you whine a tight “that’s it” fingers working furiously at your clit, hips rocking down as you meet his thrusts “Joel, yes” you groan, the sound reverberating in your chest.

He feels your cunt squeeze him “tha’s it, good girl”, he needs to stop or he’ll cum but you don’t care, continuing to rock your hips, thrusting down forcefully against him, cock reaching deeper than you thought possible and you tense, muttering a “fuck” as you cum hard around him. You can’t comprehend that this is what it feels like, the violent quivering of your muscles, tight and squeezing. Fuck, you don’t want to let this feeling go, Joel’s cock buried so deep inside you it hurts, you never want to cum without this ever again.

Joel gives a few tight thrusts, “Shit, what a sight” He has to pull out, he can’t cum inside you, can’t take the risk but the rhythmic pulsing of your walls is dragging him kicking and screaming to the edge. You let out a breathy “inside Joel, inside,” the way you say his name sends a shiver down his spine, but the way you moan the softest “please” has him cumming, cock twitching violently, hips rocking, pushing his release deeper.

His mouth meets yours roughly, ragged groans escaping between harsh kisses as he continues to pump inside you. He can’t remember the last time he came this hard, beyond satisfied and completely drained but he still can’t break his lips from yours. The kiss is soft now, tender and lazy, something close to loving. His sweaty weight above you is grounding, bringing you back to reality.

Joel groans and drops his forehead to your chest, cock still buried deep you can sense his reluctance to part from you, you tangle your fingers in his hair, allowing him to rest against you. He stays for a minute or two before groaning, aging knees and shoulders protesting as he hovers over you.

He moves slowly, dragging his softening cock out from your over sensitive heat and you moan low in the back of your throat as he disappears, returning from the en-suite with a damp towel,

“There’s warm water” he mumbles as he wipes the towel gently between your legs. You hum contentedly, your tired body drowsy and dopamine drunk. You briefly think about the long hot shower you’re going to take in the morning when the bed dips next to you and Joel reaches for you, rolling you into his side, your head on his chest. If you had more energy you’d say something but the gentle caress of Joel’s thumb behind your ear and the slow thump of his heartbeat quickly has your eyes closing and your breath steadying.

“Was that” Joel pauses, what, good? All right? Just okay? he thinks it’ll kill him if it was bad for you

“Good, it was good” you offer him a soft smile “thank you”

“Christ darlin’ so fuckin’ polite” he can feel himself stirring again beneath the sheets, and fuck he’s depraved, he’s convinced you could make him cum just by saying please.

Joel must think you’re asleep and you feel it more than you hear it, his whispered admission of “love you” spoken into your hair as he presses soft kisses to the top of your head.

𝐉𝐎𝐄𝐋 𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐑 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

#joel miller fanfiction #joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller #tlou fanfiction #tlou smut #joel tlou #joel miller one shot #delicate | j miller #love potion writes #love potions writing #han writes

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octuscle · 2 months

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Being a Gogo boy looks fun… but it’s definitely a certain kind of body you need for it.

Did you know that the basic Chronivac package does not include individual support? But I'd be happy to make an exception for you. Perhaps also to avoid further unnecessary support cases.

The be-all and end-all of a good transformation is a sensible prompt that you enter for the transformation. For example, the desired result could be "A twenty-year-old athletic go-go boy with excellent dancing skills in erotic leather clothing". You should perhaps add what and where your new self is. I'm assuming that you don't suddenly want to be sitting at your grandma's coffee table in high leather boots. So let's add "On the dance floor of a dimly lit nightclub at 02:00 in the morning". If the journey is the destination for you, you have to describe that too. For example, "Immediately beginning a steady transformation that ends in 48 hours." To summarize: "Immediately beginning uniform transformation into a twenty-year-old athletic go-go boy with excellent dancing skills in erotic leather clothing, ending in 48 hours on the dance floor of a dimly lit nightclub at 02:00 in the morning." Attention, the AI only implements what you write, so the dance floor will be where it is in 48 hours at 02:00 in the morning.

It is 13:00 in Amsterdam when you press "Enter". Congratulations! The nightclub where you're whipping up the masses is obviously in Honolulu. However, you look like anything but a gogo boy. Slightly overweight office worker in his mid-40s… I'm curious. The change in your routines starts right at lunchtime. No quick stop at the burger joint across the street. Instead, three quarters of an hour on the cross trainer in the company gym. And then a small salad. No dressing. And a liter and a half of still mineral water. You've been taking almost manic care of your body for six months now. And it shows. You've really lost weight. Your skin is much better. And your taste in clothes has also improved. Nice suit!

You listen to music at work during the afternoon. Unusual for you. You actually need peace and quiet. Now you can only concentrate with music… Well… Concentrate… Actually, you surf the Internet more. And checking out horny guys on Grindr. You have your first date right after work at 5 pm. Just before that, a quick check in the toilet. Yes, for a man in his early 40s, you're pretty darn tight. Bright smile, always slightly tanned. And a tight butt. That's what you're known for in your department.

A hot fuck like this on the way home is a great way to switch off after work. When you get home, you quickly get changed and then it's off to the gym. Boxing arobics is on the schedule today. Perfect training for strength, muscle building and fitness. And most of the participants are to your taste. After the workout, you spend some time on the free weights. And then in the sauna. It's almost 10 p.m. by the time you're in the shower. Fortunately, you're not alone. Time to drop the soap.

The alarm clock rings at 11:00. Still, it was a short night… Since you work as a bartender in the club, you're one of the last to call it a night. In your mid-30s, you're too old for a job on stage or at the pole bars. But you're definitely a looker. Says the guest whose bed you've just woken up in. Awesome apartment with a view of the beach and the sea. And even if it's a really old geezer: Great morning wood! You'll be happy to let him fuck you and then put a few dollar bills in your panties. Yes, you are a whore. But a very successful one!

Unfortunately, even the hottest guy in Honolulu has to do things like laundry or shopping and cooking dinner. Especially when you're on such a strict diet as you are. Luckily you got the last appointment for a manicure and eyebrow correction at Agnes. Nothing stands in the way of a successful evening.

The time from 22:00, when the club opens, to 24:00, when you have your first gig, is usually the most lucrative. The men who are there that early are usually very solvent and very generous. Especially with the king of lap dancing. But your real hour is when all the spotlights are on you. For the first few minutes, the dance floor is all yours. And then you'll bring the club on fire!

#male tf #muscle tf #reality change #chronivac #age reduction #leather tf #ai image

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meandmyechoes · 9 months

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Kingohger ep24

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERICA~!!!!

LOTS happened IRL and I'm near my fking limit. dpeending on kingoh to keep me going at this point

big big shame the kyoto event is cancelled because of the typhoon😭😭 but at least 14/8 Kyushuu is safe so we'll still find out if they let Rita have short hair

--- episode ----

Gira awakened the giant robot "with the people" 😭😭

kamejim still lives huh. a split in opinion in the villains... destroy the earth vs. rule the earth 🤔🤔

wait this is the same global warming plot as g-rosso 😂😐 /jk

is there deeper meaning zooming in on Gokkan…? (like where exactly IS the bugnarok base and how that lead to 27-30?)

Gerojim following up with each sentence after Jeramie cuuute

Jeramie my dear, if you keep up with the "protecting the young is the duty of the elders" I'm gonna be really afraid for you near the 40s

(edit: glad I misheard this: he said "disciplining the young" ok boomer)

busy man fighting and narrating for the show

ohhh he changed the narration "the story of Hell's King and another who'd become king" it's entirely about him now

he's even taken over his teammates' OP shots

the kings asking gira to validate their treaty and. rita. rita-sama. how does moffun marathon help with the melting of your glaciers

dead stare rita 💜

OI does Caucasus Kabuto-jou even HAVE a security if a nine-year-old can get in or is the orphanage some kind of ninja academy instead

ah… Boon... Gira can you just adopt him otherwise the first policy you make as king should've been improving the orphange's welfare huh 😢 but yes more personal vs. duty conflict

it hurts them both for Gira to say "the evil king is not your nii-chan" 🥺

Yanma looking sideways when in fact the other kings are in front of him in his phone

Yanma你嫁過去啦好無😂 賢內助

不満を発散しないと爆発しる

Rita: "If one cannot disperse thier dissatisfaction, they will explode." perfect. 100% what someone who screams random would say

AHHHH Geroujim-chan helping!! Good boy! Jeramie defending him!! Geroujim refuse to leave him alone!!

Takada Masahi being the busiest person running both A & B plot this ep 😂😂

stopping mid-fight to talk... what a jeramie thing to do

ah they really are a shooting stand told you Yanma looks like a scammer lol. Why are the prizes his personal merch...

New Fry Noodle dance just dropped

as a person i'm fulfilled. to be able to hear Rita singing* Moffun's Song on record

what privledge to have the Sovereign/Chief Justice make you shaved ice…

the ice machine making chibi moffun chirps

"chimidoro" + red syrup 😂

Takada-san has a close-up too!

lamp post… smol. helpless. the evil king.

Speaking of which these three aren't royal blood (rita quantum as always but)

The team care about Gira as a person before he is king 😭

this may not be the best storytelling or my fan filter is too heavy at this point but. i really love how the team has this unsaid understanding and respect of each other's position on the (equal!) ground that they are both leaders of their country and had to face the same struggle of duty vs. self

and that kizuna is often reflected in action (instead of words)!

taking Jeramie's speech about "what's written in the past cannot be changed, but the present and the future is still in my hand" with Gira's conversation with Rainoir… the theme of creating your own future ne.

Like, I feel like this episode is Jeramie's movie (where his character exploration was sacrificed for screentime in the actual one)

the cameras! can you be more obvious! the eventual Red-Sixth heart-to-heart is gonna kill me

Gira repeating his philosophy of "I protect the people, the people protect those around them" as echoes to his brother (ep18) and movie's "living in this world is hell (re:ep23)" huh

Jeramie kneeling down below his sight line when Boon is all offenseive 😭😭

Boon, you're both Ohsama Sentai 😭

Jeramie is "The Prophet" not because he actually has prophetic power but the current animosity/ignorance is created by his stories and choice of words 😭😭

Jeramie thinking his wordings is just a statment of fact while others interpret it as an opinion is peak autistic behaviour

his disillusionment *heart hurts* Masahi's acting and also the cameras closing in + replicating 11's angles. He put his bug hand over his face like the spider mask that he stayed behind all those years. the mask that was a gift from his parents. maybe as if to hide, maybe as now he truly understands the bugnarok. whyyy is jerami's character so tragic!! (talk about being named after greek myth characters)!

ah Gira immediately covering Boon!

exclusive full team transform!

ooh Boon held onto his cape!

the gattai took too long and the monster ran away 😂 (FALSE)

minatures my love!!

red gira i missed you

minatures my love!!

ahh high five!!

history repeats itself...

formation fights formation fights!!

Souchou are you flying with tonbo wings !?!

the b&w shippers!

(but Kaguragi's movie scene about betrayal!)

His middle name is Idomonarak?? (namesake)

(edit: with Himeno having one as well, are the kings' middle name gonna be a story? or had a story but not included to save screentime?)

I'm really glad they kept Jeramie's weakness in family matters (not as much a "lack of strength" but something that can easily persuade him since he values it) because i'm also very weak in family matters… that's one of the reason i grew a liking to him

i objected to yanma at the same time as gira. thank you gira 😭

"I'll do it all by myself. Only then can I be the King who Rules Over All." STOP YOU'RE IN A SENTAI S.E.N.T.A.I we join forces and have NAKAMA didn't we went through with this whole arc with rita (at least in my head) 😭

but that's a very Sixth thing to do. um *nods*.

Eighth-chan!!! NOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOO there's no way back once you go giant!

I salute you. You are a good villain.

Jeramie reaching out with his bug hand

"Akarui" any connection to Deathnarok's comment looking into Gira's eyes in ep10?

bro I love this episode but I didn't expect it would be because of the main plot part and not the silly matsuri part?!?

they are furthering the angle that everyone involved in ep20's relief operation is a member of the Taskforce 😭

totally forgot to take note of earcuff-chan. too distracted by plot and expecting tomorrow

+ if they have the whole supporting cast here is this is probably what they shot on Yuhei-san's birthday (19 July)

ep25:

KABE... KABE... KABEDON??!?!!?!?!?!?!

#kingohger #kolb #kingohger spoilers #kingoh meta

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vacantgodling · 1 year

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tit for tat: the character from witch noir i'm most obsessed with right now is angel. he just sucks so bad, but at the last minute he decides to try really hard!! for love!!! he's a cancer sun pisces moon pisces rising he's so sad and pathetic and full of love. he cries big ghibli tears and changes reality through sheer force of he believes in it so hard. he can't drive and his best friend is a cat. and he looks like oscar isaac.

now you 🔁

thank you for doing this i’m also now???? obsessed with him. cancer x pisces baby he’s so TINY idk i’m holding him i am kissing on the head i am giving him hot chocolate 😭 i’d love to know more about him?? how does he suck? how does he manage to turn things around? what’s his cats name??? i need to knowww

(also he looks like oscar isaac? i’m 👀 looking)

i randomly get into moods for stuff so like earlier i was going through my google drive with all my nonsense and looked back over my stuff for NAD and man i wish this plot would better reveal itself to me bc i love these characters. so much!!!

NAD rn is an acronym placeholder title for the actual wip itself (hopefully it’ll name itself… one day…) standing for the 3 povs that the story’s gonna switch through.

N is for Nyseah Nicoletti. she’s a trans femme nurse who is so. fucking. tired. she’s so damn tired. let her sleep. in her 30s and works the midnight shift most nights of the week and hardly takes time for herself, chain smokes to keep the edge off of how tired and irritable she always is. she wants better for herself but like ? how. getting the boob job was hard enough lmao. anyway tho, she’s given a respite from her misery one rare night off and she decides (for once) to go out. gets all dressed up, goes to a bar and WOW? a handsome man is actually?? flirting with her???? this doesn’t happen every day, what’s the occasion? they end up going back to a motel, fuck, and then nyseah wakes up alone. everything’s cool… until she opens her left eye. then SUDDEN PAIN!!! (i posted that excerpt here but she’s not having a god time). and well, come to find out she’s psychic now. but not in a good way. in a if you even think about using your powers blood is pouring from your eye type of way. ends up meeting some “escaped experiment” kids that she immediately adopts who are able to help her but her whole story is kinda. revenge for this dude who fucked her over like this bc it’s definitely one-night-stand dude’s fault (and this ain’t just a funny like. he literally caused this lol,,)

A is for Alona. a sweet, little air headed but doing her best! college student in her early 20s. she picks up a job at the largest and most famous (infamous probably) company in the city as a part time secretary and is living the good life, or is trying to! her coworkers are a bit standoffish at times but she’s pretty chill with the whole thing until one day for the first time she’s asked to stay on for the night shift. that night goes well, but she notices what looks to be a trail of blood coming from one of the back rooms she’s told not to go into and while she doesn’t that night the thought doesn’t leave her mind. she just can’t help but want to know more? somethings not right and well. she’s curious! (let’s just hope the cat phrase doesn’t come to fruition shall we).

finally, D is for PI Donte MacBride, the oldest of the bunch in his mid 40s. he really should retire from doing pi work but he has no other prospects or savings, so he just lives out his days in his little rickety shop/turned upstairs apartment (since he lost the last real place he had), shooing away those with hopes of him facing the cruel justice system on their behalf. he won’t, not anymore, he’s done with that circus. and he’s all but stopped taking on cases too until one day a very. very famous guest decides to drop by; an actor known only by his first name leonine. he comes by to request his services, claiming its only for closure as per don’s policy: find out who killed recently killed rising star, the singer roxanne davis, one of his dearest friends. and he makes don a monetary offer he can’t refuse—one that would set him for the rest of his life. so… despite the red flags about touching this case going off in his head, don finds himself taking on one last case.

as you can probably guess, these three stories intersect and the three of them are going to meet and realize they’re all on the same path to… whatever the fuck is going on here. but !! i have yet to figure out truly what it is aside from lil bits and pieces. fjfjfj i’m sorry this was so long haha.

#s: nad #just thinking about the True Found Family Dynamic

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let-us-meet-aga1n · 9 months

Text

I'M BACK WITH: 100 questions about tremolo answered because he deserves more appreciation after the whole clover thing (#fuckyouclover)

part 1/2!!

1. Are they a man or a woman? man. the father figure, if you will

2. Do you know how old they are? If yes, what’s the age gap? he's in his mid 40s, i'm 15. approximately 30 years lmao

3. What subject do they teach? orchestraaaaa let's go

4. Do you like the subject they are teaching? if i didn't, i would not still be taking this class!! yes! i love orchestra! so much so that i want to be an orchestral composer! crazy right?

5. What are your grades like for their subject? he genuinely doesn't have the heart to give anyone below an a+ soooooo

6. What is your favorite assignment they’ve set so far? since he doesn't give out "assignments" per se, i'm gonna say a piece of music! dives and lazarus from northumbrian suite (ian david coleman) was the first thing that came to mind. sure, it was an easy piece, but god did it invoke emotion...

7. What is your least favorite assignment they’ve set so far? front porch jam. it's a fiddle piece with straight 16th notes for the 1sts (me) played at 140 and it's literally all over the place... WE'RE AN ORCHESTRA TREMOLO NO FIDDLES IN SIGHT HERE THEY'RE CALLED VIOLINSSSSSS

8. Do they set homework often? like, normal homework? no. he only ever does that when he's not there for the day. but but but, he does give us at least 3 new pieces every 9 weeks, and we have to learn them by the end of it, so he does expect us to practice.

9. Is your TC generally liked as a teacher by their students? yes!! everyone loves him because he's such a dad and very kind and approachable

10. Is your TC close to any other students? so, the kids younger than me? idk, but my orchestra from last year, there was only one other person he was close to, and that was a senior 'cellist who graduated to go study music, so, as far as i know, i'm the last survivor heheheheh

11. How often do you have them for lessons? every other day during the school year

12. How long have you been taught by them? since 5th grade! (11)

13. What do they look like? white, bald man. very long beard. basically think of a stereotypical middle aged white man dad, and boom that's my orch teacher.

14. Do you typically find people who look like your TC attractive? no, because i don't find middle aged men attractive, let alone my teachers 🥰 it's literally 100% platonic and in a "i wish he were my dad :(" kinda way

15. What is your favorite feature of theirs? i mean, i don't really pay attention to physical features, but he has green eyes and the only reason i know that is the unbelievably high amount of times i have tried to communicate through blinking to him.

16. What is their hair like? What color and style is it? bald. just bald. BUT HE DID HAVE A MULLET DURING COVID AHAHAHAHAHAH- dark dark dark brown hair. borderline black.

17. What is their eye color? a swampy kinda green, but like not brown enough to be hazel if you know what i mean.

18. What would you describe their body type as being? middle aged white man.

19. How would you describe their style? again, middle aged white man. EXCEPT HE DOES WEAR A BOW TIE ALL THE DAMN TIME AND BEFORE I KNEW WHO HE WAS I CALLED HIM MR. BOW TIE.

20. Are there any clothes you think they look their best in? idk i've only seen him in casual wear and formal wear because that's all he ever wears???? only reason i've seen him in casual wear is because of NASHVILLE YAHOO!!!!

21. Would they be considered by most people to be physically attractive? he's a middle aged white man. next question.

22. Do they have any tattoos which you know about? nope!

23. Do they have any piercings which you know about? also nope!

24. Do they have any scars which you know about? not that i know about, but i do suspect he has sh-ed in the past because he said, and i quote, it's a "very familiar thing" for him... 🤨 he did NOT report me though so xoxo for valuing my privacy and NOT telling people without me knowing (ahem CLOVER ahem (fuck you you could've at least told me you bitch))

25. Which is the most attractive to you, the way they look or who they are inside? INSIDE DUH IT'S PLATONIC‼️ I CANNOT EMPHASIZE THIS ENOUGH IT'S A PLATONIC TC!!

26. What is their teaching style? (Eg. Strict or caring) very, very caring. he's always been student first, school later.

27. Do you like their teaching style? yes!!! he's the best 🥺

28. How would you describe their personality? very calm. he's very chill and i'm surprised at the amount of patience he has.

29. Do you usually find people with their personality type attractive? in boys my own age? yes. in men his age? i find it endearing and funny in a way

30. Do other people like your TCs personality? yes! everyone loves mr. bow tie!!!!

31. What is their sense of humor like? Do you think they’re funny? dad humor if you made it more millennial. he knows too much tbh. like, we tried hiding a word meaning from him (BFFR) and he went "okay, since y'all won't tell me i'm looking it up on urban dictionary." AND THE ENTIRE CLASS SCREAMED "NOOOOOO"

32. If you could change one thing about your TC, what would it be? i would change him to be my dad. :/

33. What’s a song that always makes you think of them? hmmm good question! because you're here - hatsune miku

34. What was your first impression of them? he intimidated the shit out of me, and i could not tell you why. i just remember he wanted to hear us all play solo at least once, and he came to the seat next to mine to listen to me, and i was literally QUIVERING in fear and he goes "do i scare you? you're shaking a lot..." and my 6th grade ass goes "i'm not shaking!" and he grabs my hands and says "calm down... trust me, it's not that big of a deal. i'm not grading you for it, i just want to hear you play, okay?" and i was like "....fine."

35. How long did it take you to fall for your TC? Was it instant attraction or did it take you getting close to them to realize you had a crush on them? again, absolutely no romantic attraction to this man at all. but, PLATONICALLY, it was around 7th grade when things started to get rough, and i knew his class was a safe space, so i just had to get to the fine arts hall, and at the end of it, he was always there in the orchestra room. so it took around 2 years.

36. What happened to make you realize you had a crush on them? again, not romantically, platonically, BUT it was when i started opening up and being vulnerable with him. after siren, i hadn't been able to do that with ANYONE. and you know what? he didn't yell at me for being a human, he didn't criticize, and he didn't even take pity on me, which i appreciated. he sat and listened. that was all i ever wanted. he never betrayed that trust, and that's when i realized i looked up to him a lot.

37. When you first met them, could you have ever imagined that your feelings would become so deep? no lmao if i told 5th grade me that in the span of 4 years you'd be able to open up about things like suicide and self-harm to him, she would've dropped out of his class SO FAST.

38. Did you ever think you’d have a crush on a teacher? no because i still don't! xoxo 🥰

39. Have you ever had any TCs before? platonic? yes. romantic? never. never ever ever.

40. Do you know anyone else who has a crush on your TC? i mean his wife is the only one that likes him in THAT way does that count

41. Do you know their relationship status? Are they married, in a relationship or single? married with children! that's why he's such a dad... because he literally IS on e😭

42. If they’re married or in a relationship, does this bother you? NOT ONE BIT. AGAIN, 100% PLATONIC.

43. Do they have any children? yes! 2 or 3 i can't remember how many...

44. What do you think they’d be like as a parent? SOBBING THE BEST PARENT EVER HE SEEMS SO SUPPORTIVE AND DOWN TO EARTH AND SWEET AS A PARENT

45. Do they have any pets you know about? YES he has a dog

46. Are your feelings for your TC platonic or romantic? PLATONIC I CANNOT OVERSTATE THIS ENOUGH

47. How would you describe your feelings for your TC? 3 words: the father figure.

48. If you had the chance to marry them tomorrow, would you take it? absolutely not <3

49. If they weren’t your teacher and the same age as you, do you think you’d be dating them? idk if he was my age.... i might fall for the nerdy geeky orchestra kid lmao

#🎼.mp3 #tc community #tcc feelings #tcc tumblr #tccblr #tcc struggles #tcc thoughts #platonic teacher crush #platonic tc #tc blog

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allmightluver · 3 years

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**bnha spoilers** I'm just sat here with renewed realisation of what All Might is going through. 40 years. /40 years/ he held and refined that power and dedicated his every waking (and sleeping if Vigilantes is anything to go by) moment towards the goal of defeating AfO and creating a society in which people could feel happy and safe. And now as it turns out AfO is still alive, society is broken and he has given a literal piece of his soul to this young boy leaving himself with only phantoms

Yes. I don’t think people quite grasp what all he’s going through.

It’s been shown recently to us that some, if not most, heroes have underlying ambitions in becoming a hero. Whether for money, glory, fame, popularity, doesn’t matter. They’re ultimately in it for themselves. Toshinori’s intentions from the beginning have been the most pure- he wanted to be a symbol that people can look to and know things will be ok. A symbol of hope. This boy was only around 14 years old when he decided this. What kind of 14 year old sees the world that clearly? Sees that people have no hope, that a veil of darkness covers them. The only thing I can think of is- Toshinori did not have a good childhood. Something had to have happened to a boy that young to stop seeing the joy in life so early, and see the world’s flaws. Truthfully, I believe he was an outcast- due to his quirklessness. Most likely an orphan, perhaps abandoned by his parents, as we’ve never seen him have any family. I do truly believe Toshinori has been alone all his life. I don’t doubt more could have happened to him as a child before he met Nana.

Some may argue that Izuku is the same age, and therefore it shouldn’t be that hard to see why Toshinori wanted to be a hero at such a young age. BUT, Izuku had someone to look up to, ever since he was a child of four years old, to inspire him to be a hero his whole life *cough cough* All Might. Izuku also was quirkless, much like Toshinori, and an outcast because of it (hence where I assume Toshinori was much the same). But ultimately, Izuku wanted to save people because he saw his hero do it. It really wasn’t until Izuku was a bit older, has been in UA, has been on rescue missions, has seen what the heroes see, that I think he’s truly realized how dark the world really is. Toshinori didn’t have that. He didn’t have someone to inspire him as a child, someone to look up to, a hero to inspire him to help others. At that time, heroes hadn’t become as popular as they are in present times. Toshinori saw the world for what it was, on his own, at a tender age. I think that day Nana ran into this blonde hair kid, she eyed him up, noticed his scraggly form, looked into those captivating blue eyes, and saw a man who’s lived through the world’s horrors- experienced the worst it has to offer-, and wants to save everyone he can from the same fate, all in a 14 year old boy.

Then after only a few short years with the woman he saw as his mother, she’s killed in front of him because of his own weakness- he wasn’t strong enough yet to protect her. The only other person his life, Gran Torino, literally abused him. He beat him to a pulp, taking his own emotions out on a teenager, and I doubt Toshinori said anything of it. He probably thought he deserved it. He’s still afraid of Gran Torino to this day, remembering the beatings and expecting more for his failures- even if he doesn’t know what they are surely he’s at fault for something, but he’s the only person who’s stood by his side for this long. Even while at a distance, and spouting nothing but criticisms along the way. But Toshinori had to put aside his own emotions to be that hope for everyone. He left everything he knew to go to a new country on his own, to learn how to be a hero, to be that hope for someone.

Vigilantes showed us just how hard he worked. Toshinori literally stayed awake with no sleep for days on end- 3 in the chapter I’m referencing- because people needed help, people needed saving, and no one else stepped up. He fought villains, rescued civilians, repaired damage, cleared rubble, (even accept and eat food that was against his dietary restrictions after his injury) whatever the public needed, all while draining himself further. He worked himself to the point of exhaustion because he had no help, once literally falling asleep while mid-leap across the city because he simply could go no further.

^^These happen in succession of each other^^

No one stepped up to say “Hey, Mr. Number 1, you’ve been working hard lately. Let me help you!” No one tried to take over his position. Even the Number 2 hero, Endeavor, never tried to take some of his burden. His only goal was to try to be better than All Might in terms of power- he was never trying to be the hero that the people relied on All Might for. Everyone relied on him when things looked grim. He was the back up plan. And all of this happened before Toshinori’s injury.

The only thing he ever wanted to do- help people- he can’t do (at least the way he’s always known how to). The ability to save people has been taken from him in the most gruesome way. He was finally able to fight the man that killed Nana, and in a rage that I’m sure echoed with all of the emotions of the previous users, he smashed that man’s head like a grape. But not without consequence. Several organs are gone. The pain is excruciating. He wears that man’s mark on his body for the rest of his life, never truly able to rid himself of the filth.

Then we have Nighteye’s betrayal. The man that helped him as a sidekick, the man that grew to be his only friend. Now some people may ask why Toshinori flipped like he did to Nighteye looking into his future when he was concerned about him making it through his injury. What I believe is Toshinori didn’t want to know when he would die (and really, who does). Now he knows he’s on a time limit, knows the clock is ticking. Time is running out to keep the world at peace, and with him as he is now, how long can this go on?

I think the betrayal, doing something that Toshinori specifically asked him not to do, is what hurt the most. How can he trust Nighteye anymore? He already can only count on one hand the people he can trust, let alone befriend.

He’s wasted away into a skeleton, a shell of the man he used to be. He can’t over exert himself without his only lung bleeding in protest. It’s canon in the side books that he really doesn’t eat much, which isn’t good for his diet without a stomach now (he’s supposed to have several small meals a day). He is quite literally punishing himself by starving. (Granted, he doesn’t feel hunger anymore.) He’s a sick man, beyond medical help at this point. They can only stabilize him and hope for the best. For five years now he’s in constant pain, every day. He loses blood like sweat. Surely his veins are bruised and collapsed with how many times he would have needed to be hospitalized. Whether from losing too much blood, being too dehydrated or starved from “forgetting” to eat, or an organ failing as body continues to fall apart. “...even as my body rots and grows frail...” - Toshinori People are bound to stare at him as he walks down the street. A tall, willowy, skeleton with a grimace on his face and blood stains on his clothes as he coughs up more into his own hands. There would be the ones who outright ignore him when they walk by, the people who offer pitying smiles and sympathetic glances or just outright stare, and then ones who are afraid of his appearance- children screaming at the mere sight of him and running to their parents to hide from the monster. Each one is another knife in Toshinori’s side, an ache in his chest. If only they knew who I really am.

Losing Nighteye took a toll on his hero work as well. Mirai was a huge help in the past, and took care of all Toshinori’s paperwork, while also reminding him to take care of himself. Without him, Toshinori was even more buried beneath his responsibilities. Plus, now he was on a time limit. He even snapped briefly in his first meeting with Tsukauchi, accidentally revealing himself as All Might because he was under too much pressure, and telling the detective he literally couldn’t handle doing everything by himself (who graciously took over the paperwork side of things for him).

He was living a double life now, having to lie to people left and right about who he was while in his small form, about how he became so sickly, why he was here in the first place who the heck is this skinny old guy. Surely he had multiple visits to the doctor while continuing to repair the damage done by AFO (there’s a limit to how much the body can handle at once. And things I’m sure continued to fail as time went on). Then he would be bedridden for as long as the doctors could keep him strapped to a bed, until he couldn’t take the people’s cries for help any longer, and would jump into action. (It’s also revealed he has something of a super hearing- able to hear danger- which may have been a form of danger sense of OFA that was never fully unlocked?. Either way, he surly could sense disasters happening while he could only lay and heal from his latest surgery. Those poor doctors must have had to re-stitch him several times). People blame him for not preparing society for his retirement, that he failed in passing on the torch so to speak, but in reality he did everything possible to keep society from falling for 40 years, doing all within his power just to keep things afloat. He is only one person. One human being, he can’t do everything despite trying to. Society failed All Might.

People blame him for not being a good teacher. He didn’t exactly have the greatest teacher himself to learn from. He’s never had to teach anyone anything, he just punches! He’s learning. And for his own credit, he’s an incredibly wise man, he has years of experience under his belt, and an intelligence score of 6/6, scoring up there with Nezu! He may not always have the right way to bring something up, but he’s doing his best. Yet even he blames himself for Izuku not being able to control his quirk better. Every time the boy hurts himself, it’s just another tally on the chalkboard of Toshinori’s failures. He himself knows the boy deserves better, better than him. Useless. Pathetic.

Then his friend from America, Dave, essentially became a villain trying to preserve Toshinori’s legacy after Toshinori told him about his injury. Dave went behind his back, threatened people, injured people (pretty sure people died), all for Toshinori’s sake. Something he didn’t want to begin with. Having to put your only other friend in jail for trying to help you surely couldn’t have been easy.

Oh, by the way? All For One isn’t dead. All Might will fight him again, publicly, have his weakened form exposed to the world, and have his own emotions toyed with as he finds out about his master’s grandson in the villain’s hands. Would Nana hate him for leaving her son alone like she’d asked, and dooming her grandchild to be raised by the greatest villain? Could he have done anything to save him? But Toshinori isn’t allowed to feel, he has to smile and push his own feelings aside once again, because there’s a villain to be fought, and only he can fight him. Despite coming out on top, he’ll have suffered severe head trauma, broken left arm, destroyed right arm, and several cuts and bruises that are sure to scar. And then, his quirk, the only thing that’s been allowing him to help people, the gift given to him that he carefully held for 40 years and molded into his own until his very consciousness was permanently carved into it, blows out like a match in the wind. And he’s done. Used up. Empty. Broken. Hollow. Alone, again.

He overhears his student, Bakugo, admit that he blames himself for All Might’s retirement. If he hadn’t been captured, All Might wouldn’t have had to save him, and he wouldn’t have had to fight AFO. Of course Toshinori knows that’s not true, his time was about to run out anyway. It would have happened one way or another. But how can he explain to this child that he wasn’t the cause of his hero, the world’s greatest hero, fighting for his sake, bleeding for his sake, being forced into retirement to keep him safe. Every time Bakugo sees the bandages covering Toshinori’s body is another reminder of the pain and sacrifice Toshinori willingly gave to keep him safe. Toshinori wasn’t held when his mentor died. He wasn’t told it was ok to be sad, that grief and mourning was a natural process, that it takes time to heal. He wasn’t told it was ok to cry. Instead his feelings were beaten out of him as he wondered if Gran Torino blamed him for Nana’s death. He already blamed himself How then, does he comfort a child mourning for him? For what he lost.

And then he gets the call to come to the hospital. Mirai, Nighteye, his old sidekick friend, has been gravely injured, much like he himself was only a few years ago, and most likely won’t survive the night. And to his horror, Nighteye is happy to see him, smiles at him, says he doesn’t hate him for what happened, only wants Toshinori to be happy. He can’t accept that, at least let him apologize, reconcile his sins before it’s too late! But it is. Another fractured piece of his heart gone.

Of course, seeing your students beat up and their arms completely destroyed must have hurt. Instead of being able to save these kids, they’re the ones that hurt themselves to save everyone else. And if Bakugo had kept OFA, things could have been very different (especially with what we know now of OFA and people with quirks). Toshinori wasn’t mad at Izuku for transferring it away, he’d never regret choosing Izuku, and I believe he still would have stayed by Izuku and Bakugo’s side should it have stayed in Bakugo, doing whatever he could to help.

As he tells Aizawa, “I’ve decided to live,” -that statement seems so melancholy, besides obvious reasons. It sounds more like another task he has to accomplish. He didn’t die he was supposed to die with the AFO fight, and now the whole life he lived is over. The world has no use for him anymore. If not for Izuku, he’d have nothing left keeping him here. But because his boy made him promise to live, he’ll do so. Though it almost seems like he says those words with regret. “I’ve decided to live.” Not, “I’m going to live!” “Nothing can kill me!” “I won’t go down without a fight!” No. “I’ll live if I have to, only because you asked me to.” The man is obviously and outwardly depressed. He has so many things against him. No doubt has severe PTSD, anxiety, among others. Not to mention his own physical health. Every day hurts. It’s painful to be alive. Why would he torture himself if he doesn’t have to? For you, my boy. You’re the only thing keeping me here. The only light in my dark world.

He tries to help Izuku find out the previous holder’s quirks, to help his boy in any way he can now that he’s worthless, and goes days on end without sleep, running his body into the ground. He even forgets Christmas. Only to find that by giving the boy the same gift he had received, he may have just doomed him to an early death, among psychological torture (danger detection). (Granted, he really doesn’t know how everything works, and he’s afraid to talk to anyone about it). His boy could live only half a life.

It’s only been a few months since he retired, and society has fallen into shambles. People are blaming him. People are dying. He watches helplessly as his colleague fight his fight for him, and end up battered, bruised, crippled, dead. He students, his boy, battle the monster he should have killed. Children are bleeding. This shouldn’t happen. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Is everything he worked for, everything he fought to protect, to build up, to inspire, is all for naught?! Did he live a foolish dream and doom the world? Was all the the friends he lost, tears he shed, the organs he destroyed, the pain he endures on a daily basis from the hole in his side, and the blood he continues to bleed every day, for nothing? The public, the ones he protected for so long, mourn his absence, but surely there are those among them who also blame him. The statue from his last fight in Kamino one that he never asked for was decimated in a mock of his catch phrase- the one that was supposed to give hope.

Now he can feel his own vestige speaking with Izuku in the OFA realm, even with out OFA in his own body anymore. His clock as nearly reached it’s limit, Nighteye’s prediction is due any day now. The only thing he wants is to see his boy smile at him, to give him some shred of hope. Yet the child remains unconscious, and Toshinori can’t even hold his hand from the bandages covering his arms. Will he still be able to fight? Is there any coming back from this now? Did I break him?

With all Toshinori has been through, I’m honestly surprised we haven’t seen him just outright break down. Anyone, anyone, else should have crumbled under the pressure of holding up the world for 40 years alone. And instead of being able to pass it on to someone when he can no longer bear its weight, it simply falls to into the abyss. People don’t credit All Might enough for everything he’s done. Most don’t realize the sacrifices he’s made. His character is so unbelievably profound and deep, it’s more than just the “I am here!” people focus on. He’s a deeply troubled, layered, complex character. And I can’t find fault within him.

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sortasirius · 3 years

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What the Fuck Happened to the SPN Finale?

Okay so here it is, my Charlie Kelly style manifesto.

Before I get into it, I recognize that I will look like this to many of you, and that’s okay, I understand:

Secondly, your personal Takes about the writers don’t interest me, I don’t need to hear them. This, as I’ll explain, is going to remain a writer positive blog, and that’s the end of it.

Third, and most importantly: some of what I’m going to talk about is fact, and some is highly educated speculation. I will notate what is speculation, just so there’s no confusion or hot takes in my inbox that I’m a conspiracy theorist or stirring shit up for no reason.

A list of what I’ll be discussing

The episode in regards to the rest of the season

The episode issues: length, editing

Scene placement and speculation of scenes cut

The scrubbing of Jack, Cas, Eileen

Network involvement and general timeline of when things were cut

Misha: theories on where he was, official company line, why we can’t expect to hear anything directly

The silence of the cast post episode (in Misha’s case, mid episode) and what this might mean

Jensen speaking with Kripke about the ending: why it doesn’t mean what you might think (also why kripke remained positive on the ending)

Walker, and why this episode had a major shift

Why the network would do this or get involved

Why the writers of the show simply aren’t the bad guys here, and what I “want” out of this post, since I know it’ll get asked

This is very long and under a cut, but I hope you’ll give it a read.

The Episode In Regards to the Rest of the Season

So, I’ve discussed this already here, but it’s the most obvious thing to me, and that’s the way this episode simply doesn’t fit with the rest of the season.

These people in this room have, truly, been nothing but consistent when it comes to their arcs, especially this season, and the marked dropoff in quality for the finale episode is just too sus to discount to me. Dabb’s whole focus has been character-based. In his seasons, we’ve moved far away from MOTW and bro-codependency, the found family taking it’s place. Does it really sit right to anyone that that was all thrown away in literally the last episode of the entire show?

This is speculation on my part, but as a writer myself, there is no way I would be happy or willing to stamp my name on something that I didn’t think would, at the very least, wrap up the season+ character arcs that I and my team had been crafting.

And before anyone comes in here saying, “well GOT did that!” Bruh. The writing was on the wall for GOT long before the final episode. You could tell that the showrunners just wanted to be done (not only from the plot, but from the fact that they lobbied for a shorter season). Miss me with that, it doesn’t apply here. Andrew has, besides Singer and J2, been with the show longer than anyone. He cares, he is meticulous and detailed, and this ending feels worse than anything Bucklemming has ever written, let alone Dabb.

Additionally, I’ve seen a lot of people say that Dabb was never behind Destiel, that it was all Bobo and Meredith and no one else. That is reductive to the point of insult of the work Dabb has done to get this greenlit. This man did not write the s13 Dean grief arc to be slandered like this. That being said, YES, Bobo and Meredith were the leads on the DeanCas arc this season, but ANDREW IS THE SHOWRUNNER, TO GET EVEN THE CONFESSION APPROVED BY THE NETWORK HE WOULD HAVE TO HAVE THEIR BACKS. AND HE DID.

Finale Issues

So, now that we’ve gotten the fact that this episode doesn’t hit on any of the major themes the show was barrelling towards all season, let’s discuss the fact that the episode is just...weird.

Not only is it shorter than any other episode (I think with the intro and the credits/crew thing at the end, it was around 38 mins), but it was also...idk, 90% filler?

One of the lovely humans in the POLOL server did the legwork here, and broke it down:

This is weird, y’all. Most series finales are LONGER than normal (Lost, SOA, Longmire are the ones I can think of off the top of my head), and for the final episode to be this? I saw more than one person point out that we only really needed 19 episodes, what was the point of 20? AND THAT’S EXACTLY IT? WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS FINAL EPISODE IF THIS WAS ALL WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GET?

It simply doesn’t make any sense, the first half of the episode was rushed, a final monster hunt gone wrong, but in the second half? Nothing really happened? Sam lived his entire life and Dean just drove around. It doesn’t make sense to have all the emotional arcs left unaddressed in an episode that definitely needed some kind of spark.

Here’s the speculation I have: the episode seemingly went through a lot of changes between the initial inception of the final season and when we actually got it, but I think it would have been passable (as in, we wouldn’t be sitting here asking each other why each arc feels incomplete) until the editing room got ahold of it. The only think that makes this episode make sense is network fuckery. Truly, that is the only thing. It explains the weird, cuts, the rushed pacing of the first half followed by nothing in the second half, the double montages of “Wayward Son” back to back, and Dean just...driving around for the last half of the episode.

Scene Placement and Speculation of Scenes Cut

Before I get into this section, the info of the shots in the episode I have come from a source that @occamshipper got a week or so before the finale. She’s talked about this here.

So here’s what Min was given:

1-5: 1 INT MEN OF LETTERS – DEAN’S ROOM Dean is greeted by Miracle

6-10: 6 INT MEN OF LETTERS – HALLWAY/SAM’S ROOM Sam has his routine

D1 1 11-15: 15 EXT FARM HOUSE Establishing

N1 1/8 16-20: 19 Dad’s journal, marker, drawing of masked man in journal.

21-25: 23 INT IMPALA – PMP Driver picks the music

N2 1 3/8 1,2 26-30: 28pt2 INT BARN: A face from the past

28pt3 Sam and Dean say goodbye

28pt4 Shot early for technical reasons, presumably the overhead shot

N2 31-45: 41 INT MEN OF LETTERS – SAM’S ROOM Sam’s alarm goes off D4 1/8 1 46-60: 56 INT N7glasses for Sam, laptop.

So...it all fits right? It all tracks with the actual episode, where it lands, etc. The issue is between shots 29-40 which were apparently “too big to spoil.” Uh. Where are they? And where’s 28 pt4?

After Dean dies, the next scene is Sam burning him, then shot 31, the shot of his alarm going off.

So. Where are those 11ish shots?

PLUS we have the boards, which are scenes we KNOW were actually shot:

As well as scenes for 20 that were shot in 19.

It’s just...weird, it’s weird and again hits on the fact that the episode is so short and like 80% montage.

The Scrubbing of Jack, Cas, and Eileen

So now we have to reckon with the fact that Eileen was last mentioned by Sam after she got snapped by Chuck, Jack’s last mention is that he’s off being God somewhere, and Cas’ last mention is a ~knowing look~ between Dean and Bobby.

I’m sorry, make it make sense:

???????? That’s the end if it? They don’t need to be discussed after this??? It’s just simply not something a writer would do, they would not introduce these characters, these arcs, without thinking there’s going to be some kind of follow through here.

So not only were three major characters (including two leads and both of the original characters’ love interests) completely wiped from the finale episode, it was as though Sam and Dean never even needed them, which just...ain’t it.

So why Eileen and Jack too? Why not just take Cas out of it if they were afraid of the gay? Because, ultimately, the episode went back to Kripke’s original story: just the bros, they only need each other and no one else. They don’t want anyone else, they don’t need anyone else. Easier to go back to something they knew was successful than trust the writers and their audience and take a big leap.

Alex even said he shot for 20 with “some of the guys” here. What happened to that footage?

The complete 180 of it all still shocks me, I still cannot believe that we were essentially at the finish line, and the network just stopped short, and decided to go run another race, at the expense of the arc of this fifteen year legacy show.

Network Involvement and When Things Were Cut

Okay, now into the juicy stuff.

So I’ve pretty well established that network fuckery is clear, but how much did they get involved, what was the original intent?

Well again, we may never actually know what Andrew’s original script was, but I think, at the least, it would involve Dean speaking his truth to Cas and Sam living a life with Eileen.

Now, it seems today, that Misha said that Jimmy Novak was supposed to be in the finale in one iteration of the script, and while initially my brain was like “that truly makes no sense and he’s either straight up lying or telling a half truth,” I think what may be happening is Misha talking about as much as he can right now.

So Jimmy right. Weird as fuck. Why would he been in the Roadhouse and not Cas? My current thought (this is about as reachy as I’ll get) is that Jimmy had no lines, could he have been in the Roadhouse as a red herring, like it said “Jimmy” in the script but it was just Cas in human clothes, a way to get around the network saying Cas couldn’t be in the final scene. Also, you’ll notice that Misha didn’t say that Cas wasn’t supposed to be in the ep at all, just Jimmy in the last scene.

All this to say, there have clearly been multiple versions of the script, getting lighter and lighter with Cas and Eileen as the network pulled further and further back. Remember, Dabb has to get things approved before they get shot, and if the network kept asking and asking and asking to cut Cas and Eileen, he had to find a way to work around it. Granted, I still think that if we had been able to get a Dabb script that wasn’t torn to shreds in editing, it wouldn’t be so bad. It may not be what a lot of us wanted (Dean speaking his truth to Cas and a reciprocation), but doing everything he could to give it to us in subtext or visual clues.

Plus, in all honesty, my man can’t keep his story straight anyway. He said twice in his panel that the Empty and offscreen Heaven ending weren’t his original ending either.

In addition, remember that Jensen did ADR post episode 18, AND said in a meet and greet last weekend that Dean’s reaction to Cas’ confession was “cut down.” (Source here). Many of us clowns got excited when we first heard about ADR, because we thought it would be upping the ante on Dean’s reaction, but I remember being a little sus when it was just crying. My speculation on that is that they cut out Dean actually SAYING something, @winchestersingerautorepair spoke about that here.

The biggest sins were, in my opinion, committed during editing, where the network got too gun shy and sliced the episode until it was nothing but a heartless bro-fest of a finale, not mentioning anything about the other major characters that we all love, and letting the boys just suffer in separation until Sam died and finally joined Dean in Heaven. The editing came by cutting all the major emotional beats between anyone other than Dean and Sam, leaving the skeleton of the story intact, just shorter and less...poignant than it was ever supposed to be.

Misha

We know Misha was in Vancouver, we know he quarantined, but we also know he wasn’t in the final scene, when he spoke about being in the last moment of the show months ago. We were not crazy, he was there, he quarantined, and, in all likelihood (speculation but fitting with the timeline), he actually may have shot something (not much, but something).

I have sources here, here, here, and here showing where Misha was at that time.

Remember, the man was completely open about coming back until they finished shooting (look at this thread). The switch happened, just like everything else, halfway through them shooting.

Please also remember Jake Abel posting his “Where’s Misha” video here. Jake isn’t malicious, he isn’t being nasty here. Misha was there, and everyone that’s trying to convince people he’s wasn’t just...isn’t telling the truth about it.

This is one of the things that makes me really mad, because they’re literally attempting to gaslight people into thinking, “oh we were totally wrong he was never supposed to be there” WHEN HE WAS THERE, WE KNOW HE WAS THERE.

So we’ve already heard from several people (Meghan Fitzmartin, Jay, a PA on the set of 19 (WHO WAS NOT WORKING FOR 20), Misha himself) that this was all down to Covid restrictions. Ultimately, as this post says, we’ve heard FIVE versions of where Misha was. None of it makes sense, but the Covid protocol seems to be the company line that others are repeating.

You may ask: why? Why lie to all of us when we have questions? Why, in Jay’s case, say that we’re all spreading false lies to stir up trouble, when we just have questions and things that do not make sense. Simply? Warner Brothers is absolutely massive. These people have their careers to protect and are likely all under NDAs. They want to work for WB again and don’t want to burn bridges, including Misha. It sucks, but that’s why it’s unlikely that we’ll hear someone come out and say, “yeah we’re lying to you.”

Silence of the Cast Post Episode

So this is...probably the worst part of all this, at least in my opinion.

The guys had all been pretty excited about the end of the show (especially Jared, but Jensen’s panel last week was Jensen as happy and jokey and positive as I’ve ever seen him. He was so excited about episode 18, about what it meant for Dean and for Cas, and I just cannot buy that he would have been that excited unless he thought there was something more in the episode.

Misha live-tweeted the episode, and was watching it with his kids. It’s well known that Misha and the kids don’t watch the show because it’s too scary, and let’s ask ourselves, why would he have them watch an episode that he’s barely even mentioned in?

He also stopped live-tweeting at a very specific point in the episode (Dean’s death) and has not mentioned Supernatural since then.

None of them, not Jared, Jensen, Misha, or even Alex, said anything about the episode for nearly 36 hours, when Jensen posted a salty photo on instagram. It’s just...not what you’d expect for the end of a 15 year show, when the cast and crew are so close to the fans, so close to each other.

My theory? They didn’t know. They thought Misha was, at least, going to be in the episode in some way, and when he wasn’t, they decided not to say anything.

You really think that Jensen “Heller” Ackles would have been so excited about the end of the show last week if he thought Cas wasn’t going to be in it at all? Nah son, doesn’t make any sense.

Even today, in Jared and Misha’s panels, they seemed sad and...more than a little careful, both saying that there were things they couldn’t say, both talking around things that we all have questions on.

Jensen Speaking with Kripke

So this is where a lot of people are getting fodder to take shots at the writers, saying that Jensen hated it from the beginning, but I don’t think so. I actually think I know what Jensen went to him about, and it wasn’t the lack of Cas or the weird pacing or the montages (which I don’t think were there when Jensen got the script); I think it was the manner of Dean’s death.

I know a lot of people were upset about that, upset with how...normal it was, coming off an episode where they literally beat God. I actually didn’t mind it, I thought it was an interesting thematic take to be like: you can be a hero all your life, but sometimes shit happens, and you just die.

But imagine how hard that was for Jensen to read. He would run to Kripke for that, because for him, Dean dying by being impaled by a piece of rebar had to be tough to swallow.

So, why didn’t Kripke say that? Why didn’t he say, “oh well he had a problem with Dean’s death, none of that other stuff was in the script.”

Guys. Why would he get involved? He’s not going to burn bridges any more than anyone else is. He said the ending was good because it’s the easy thing to do, it’s simple, will cause him no problems in his career, and he can just ignore the people trying to engage with him on it.

Walker

Something else to talk about is the major shift this episode had from the rest of the season: the shift from Dean to Sam. I am NOT saying that Sam isn’t important, he definitely, absolutely is, but it was DEAN who really needed to wrap up his arc, Sam just needed to move on, get married to Eileen, become the leader he was always meant to. So what changed? What was with the shirtless scene, the Austin number and random case there, most of the episode being heavily Sam focused, going through his entire life in a montage?

Anyone else notice the 375 Walker promos, or Jared’s little spiel about Walker and how he hoped SPN fans would “come along for the ride.”

It’s...kinda obvious? CW wanted to appeal to who they think the key demographic of SPN and Walker is: rural areas in the South. It would explain a lot, why so much editing, why so Sam focused, the Austin number, the number of Walker promos, all of it.

I’m not saying this is fact, I don’t know that it is, but it is a little suspicious that even in Jared’s panel today, he talked A LOT about Walker and how he hopes SPN fans will watch it.

Why Would the Network Get Involved?

Simply put: $$$

If they think Walker can be the new SPN, and that those crazy SPN fans liked it originally, it’s a lot safer to go with the “original intent” of the show than do something risky (like making one of your two original leads queer).

And? They don’t care. They don’t care that the episode didn’t make sense, they don’t care that all the emotional arcs were left hanging, they don’t care by (potentially) smashing together two of Dean’s monologues (one to Sam, one to Cas) that it came of as...gross. ( @curioussubjects wrote a beautiful post showing how part of that death speech was likely meant for Dean here). They don’t care, they never have, they just want to make their money and move on from the too-loud fandom that fought for representation too hard for too long.

It can’t help but feel insidious, which, honestly, it might be, but it really all comes down to the next cash cow, which, they think, is Walker, even at the cost of the fifteen year legacy show.

The Writers and What I Want

So here it is, all this weird, sus shit laid out on the line. And you know what? To me, there is no way to blame the writers, because they didn’t want this.

I don’t think Dabb and Bobo would have gone ahead with the confession in 18 without thinking that there would be some closure to that arc, they wouldn’t have done that not only to the fans, but for the sake of their own story as well: no writer wants to start something that they can’t finish. (And this applies to both Cas and Eileen).

Here’s a basic rundown of what I think happened: they had a clear arc from 18-20, ending in reciprocation at some level from Dean, Sam marrying Eileen, Hunter Sam as the new Bobby, Dean in heaven with Cas and big roadhouse reunion at the end. Covid prevented a good amount of that. Network had to stare at big gay 18 for six months, got cold feet. Thought about Walker, target audience and alienation of the rural areas if it went full gay. Misha quarantined and likely shot something (not much), he was then cut by execs and went home. They likely added in lines referencing Eileen and Cas to make it clear but more subtextual. They wrap, editing gets it and hacks it to pieces, so we get a shorter episode that’s mostly montages and jarringly bro-centric with nothing else. Arcs are left hanging. Dabb gets episode but it’s too late, there’s nothing he can do. Actors aren’t told so they can continue to do positive PR for the ending, they all found out at the same time we did: hence almost complete silence about the finale.

And you know what? They warned us. I talked about it here, but they’ve been telling us all season that Chuck wasn’t the writer, he’s the network. I don’t think, still, that they thought it would be cut up like this, into something so unsalvageable that it’s been panned by almost everyone, even people who didn’t care much about Dean and Cas.

Finally, a masterpiece can be ruined by editing, and while I’m not sure even the script they ended up shooting on was a masterpiece (due to the network meddling already), but to me it’s blatantly obvious that it’s no one but the network that caused this, that took away closure for Dean, Cas, and even Sam.

So what do I want? Nothing really, there’s nothing we can do, but I wrote this mostly to show people that the writers are not your enemy. In fact, to the people trashing them? You’re doing exactly what the CW wants you to: blame the obvious targets, blame Misha, blame Jensen and Jared, blame Dabb. Scream and yell at them on Twitter and about how the show is ruined because of them. The network keeps their engagement levels high, they don’t get as targeted for their behavior, and just keep moving along.

Just, please, think about who did this, Mourn the show, be angry, but not at the people who fought tooth and nail for this for literal years, not the people who wanted it more than we did, not the people who cannot say anything because of their careers and the NDAs they’re bound by.

Someone is going to spill eventually, but until then, we just have to wait, and continue to be loud.

#my writing #my meta #supernatural #spn #spn finale trash fire #MY MANIFESTO IS DONE

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ugh-againwiththenames · 3 years

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more cursed thoughts...

Hey, so I totally love that we’re all losing our collective minds about the Jensen “solo gold panel on Saturday” Ackles recently…but…has anyone stopped to consider how much of a train-wreck that’s going to be?!

(Below the cut for my long winded thoughts on this...)

The man hasn’t done a solo panel in a while – not in front of a live audience, and he’s not good at them to start with (again, this is nothing against my boy, it’s simply a fact), at least not when he’s sober (and in most cases, even when he’s not!). He doesn’t like being thrown to the wolves on his own, and you’re fucking lying if you don’t consider yourself a wolf…He gets bitchy when he's asked stupid questions, or questions he can’t or isn’t allowed to answer, and he doesn't handle it well - and he’s going to shut down so fast the moment someone gets through with a Post-Confession question – he’s still not going to choose a side, if you think the boy will alienate a whole side of the fandom to choose a side, you’re wrong. From a PR standpoint alone, that would be suicide. I know that we like to live in our little bubble over here (and I will gladly sit in it and manifest along with you) but, regardless of how you cut this, a solo panel is going to be torturous for him. Everyone is over here, ‘we’re gonna get answers out of Jackles’, my dudes, my friends, my people….no, you’re not, and then you’re going to be even MORE MAD – please please do me a favour and do not HOPE for Jackles to take a stand... It’s not cowardly, and it’s not meant as a slight to either side of the fandom – it’s simply in his best interest to NOT Draw the utter Vitriolic Hatred he would receive by definitively throwing down on either side (even though I’m pretty certain we all know what side that would be). I understand we want a definitive answer, I really really do, but I cannot bear the idea of him being utterly bastardized if he doesn’t say “yes, it’s reciprocated, Dean loves Cas, you weren’t fucking crazy” verbatim...

More bits and pieces I feel crazy about:

- Him not speaking about Destiel at cons is NOT his fault, it is Creation’s, please lay your blame in the right place, he’s simply following the rules; and you can be sore about that, but you can’t deny it. The fact that Misha has been talking about it recently is great, but they have not been Creation cons, so let’s all hold our thoughts on that until then...

- If you think that Jensen is unaware of Misha’s chaos, you are nuts, he knows, he approves, and he’s happy to let Misha carry it out. He’s still liking social media posts, he’s clearly not mad at Misha, which to me, specifically, speaks to the fact that he knows about these posts prior to them being made. Misha would never antagonize Jensen - never intentionally place him in a situation he wouldn’t be comfortable with...please remember that...

- Jackles SM silence speaks louder than words - guys, we know this; it always has - he is CALCULATED - he is NOT ACTIVE on SM!! (AND) He specifically stays away from the thirst traps (the fact that he liked Misha’s bloody shirt post was a shocking anomaly not the norm), and let’s be fair - Misha also does not partake in liking the JA traps (however few and far between they are...3am bathroom selfies for example?). I would bet my -(ok i have nothing of value, but if i did, I would bet it)- that this is also something that they agreed on together...because it’s actually SO LOUD.

- I said that it would be PR suicide for him to choose a side, and I understand that people are like “so what? he needs to decide where he stands here, and his PR should not take precedence over this” - why?...Because I guarantee you’re about to sound very childish. He is an actor, in his mid-40′s, trying to accelerate his career after spending 15 years dedicating his life to one show (!) - his SM following (which nearly doubles the following of JPad or Misha, if we look at IG), and his public image are INSANELY important to him. Especially now...Drama is NOT what he needs right now - launching a new production company, acting in a new role, planning a new SPN related show...PR suicide would be disastrous. Chaos? absolutely, Drama? no.

- We are NOT J2 fans...but guys, HE is part of that side (whether or not he WANTS to be, doesn’t change the fact), regardless of how you break it down. He is the only member of the group that is SOLIDLY in both sides of the fandom (which, let’s be honest, probably plays a major role in his higher SM following), and he will be utterly CRUCIFIED by one side of the fandom REGARDLESS of where he comes down. It will be bloody, and it will be awful. Misha has the freedom to say and do what he wants without risking ANY of his fans...and we love him for it, and so does J...*shrug* please do the math here...

Look, I get that no one wants to hear that, and I would LOVE NOTHING MORE than for him to walk out on stage, say – “Yes, it’s reciprocated, now that that’s out of the way, let’s get this fucking show on the road, who’s up?” I want it so badly I can taste it, and I do think that he has hinted at that particular stance a number of times, but I’m soooooo gun-shy about hoping for that possibility to become reality, I cannot in any universe believe that it will happen. He’s naturally sooooo careful, so pointedly silent on the topic (outside of a few slips over the years), I’m certain that expecting anything less than that would be the definition of insanity for the fandom at this stage. I will drop dead right here if he ends it spectacularly – I will GLADLY be proven wrong (please, please prove me wrong - get Mish on stage and lay one on him - DO IT), I just don’t want to see Jackles hate if he doesn’t…and that’s the piece I’m scared of, because I can already see the train heading for the brick wall on this...

#jensen #jensen ackles #jackles #thoughts #personal opinions #ranting is my favourite passtime #begging jackles to prove me wrong #spn #spn con #denvercon #misha #misha collins #cockles #shellfish #cursed thoughts

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yoditorian · 2 years

Note

the real question is does din consult rebel or does he buy it without their knowledge and return home like a man truly too deep into a midlife crisis knowing they can’t do anything about it and he’ll just have to bear the consequences

he’d never admit it but din djarin is a man in his 40s and this starfighter is his ferrari

about this post i made about the book of boba fett

hello this is months old and i’m only just posting it leave me alone

lacuna’s masterlist for context

“What the fuck is that?”

“Hi.” He’s still got the helmet on, the shutters to the workshop are still flung wide open to welcome the last of the afternoon sun, but he knows the set of his shoulders gives him away.

Din Djarin is nervous.

He watches carefully as you narrow your eyes at the starfighter on the landing pad behind him, scanning the smooth edges of the ship for - well, he’s not sure what. But you’re obviously looking for something.

“Where did you find a piece of shit like this?” Your eyes are wide, clouded with disbelief. It’s clear this can only go one way or another.

He considers his answer carefully, folding his hands in front of him and stepping aside as you wipe the grease from your own on the rag hanging from your pocket. You move slowly, purposefully, and maybe it’s not a great time to admire the way you poke at the mechanics behind panels like they’re speaking to you. But hey, he married you. He’s allowed to fawn a little.

Your gaze pierces his visor over the open canopy, eyebrows raised as you wait for his answer.

“Tatooine.”

And there’s the eye roll, he knew it was coming.

“You’re joking.”

“Peli found it for me.”

“Fucking Peli,” you run a hand over your face in exasperation, “How much did she take you for?”

Okay, that’s something Din really doesn’t want to tell you. He knows he gave her more credits than this bucket of bolts is worth, not even counting the sweat he put into getting it together - and he doesn’t even want to think the amount of maintenance it’s going to take to keep the thing running. Maintenance that’ll land on you, because if you can’t go with him you’ll insist on at least making sure the thing won’t blow up mid flight.

His silence is enough of an answer for you to aim a halfhearted kick at the nose in frustration, at least none of the panels fall off with the jolt. It’s not like you’ve never flown on fumes and prayers alone, though Din knows you’d call desperate times and pull the rebellion card on that one. He can practically hear your defence already, how you’re a responsible adult with their own workshop now. You don’t have to snatch up the first thing that looks like it has half a chance to get you almost wherever you’re going, you have options. And so does he, though he’s always hard pressed to admit it. You’re convinced it’s a Mandalorian thing.

“What about your bounties?” You grunt as you pry off a panel over the left thruster, “Unless you’re planning on strapping them to the roof.”

“Fett has a job for me. Wanted to visit you and the kid before I head back there in a couple of days.”

You raise your eyes from the open panel, nimble hands paused in their delicate work.

“How is he?”

Din tilts his head in confusion.

“Fett?”

“You got a brain in there, oh great Mand’alor?”

He huffs a laugh, you have to make light of the situation. Neither of you can handle the sinking feeling in your stomachs at the sight of the empty chair at the dinner table alone. So he spares you the pain of knowing the truth, spares himself the guilt of being so close only to turn away.

“Terrorising every frog he can find, but he’s doing well. I think he misses you, the masters say he won’t leave his room in the mornings until someone’s tied that shawl around his waist.”

“That ratty thing, I can’t believe you let him take it back with him.”

“He loves it because you made it, cyar’ika.”

“Hardly,” You snort, “But until I find someone who can teach me to sew, that’s all I’ve got.”

Din rounds the pointed nose of the ship to hover over your shoulder. You’re focused on the wires, checking connections and tugging on joints to make sure the thing won’t fall apart in the sky. And he knows it isn’t because you don’t trust his work, he knows it isn't because you think it was actually a bad decision. It's about the number of pilots you've watched come crashing down to earth, its about the second empty chair that now sits at the table. So he lets you tinker.

Your shoulders deflate with a heavy sigh as you turn to him, tapping on his k’arta beskar with a pilex driver.

“Take the yellow dish in the fridge over to the farm, and I’ll start pulling this apart. I want to get a good look at it.”

“What?”

“You heard me." You step away to lever another access panel from the ship.

“I flew it here, it’s fine.”

“Get gone, Djarin.”

He moves to crouch over where you’re hunched in the dust, pulling at the hyperdrive motivator release, and lifts his helmet just enough to press a kiss against your sweaty temple.

“I love you.” Din’s words are a whisper by your ear, but never less sincere than the first time you heard them.

You turn your face up and away from the engine, just quick enough to catch his lips before they disappear back under the lowering helmet.

“I love you. Come back so I can tell you again.”

#this is weirdly kind of from din’s pov bc i’ve missed being in his head #i’m not saying peli n rebel have a history of daylight robbery n spare parts but #also i accidentally made it a little bit sad i’m sorry in advance #lacuna #din djarin x reader #the mandalorian #liz does words #ellie tag💛

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vrisrezis · 3 years

Text

Aot crush and relationship hcs

Tw as I talk about suicide for reiners bit

- liking you makes him guilty (if you’re a soldier that is) and he doesn’t completely know what to even do about the situation

- as stares at you quite a bit and is self aware it’s obvious and tries not to too much

- you’re special to him

- probably tries to bring you along home with him and bertholdt before he even confesses he likes you but it probably works in his favor

- he honestly wants to marry you, a thought in his head before he even confesses his feelings

- not a blushy boy all the time but whos to say he can’t? You can totally make him blush

- when he finally decides to confess, he’s quite nervous about it but hey.. he’s lost a lot that was important you guys don’t have much time left

- a part of him wished he never became the armored titan so he’d have a longer time with you but at the same time if it weren’t for that he wouldn’t have met you (again if you’re a soldier but ok)

- if not hey it’s fine, he got to know you growing up and had a bigass crush on you that was so obvious that porco would purposelessly flirt with you to piss him off

- in a relationship, hugs and cuddles are quite often from Reiner you make him all soft and he’s such a cuddly man look at them big arms

- he’s the best hugger and cuddler tbh

- even if it looks weird, he likes to be the small spoon sometimes, just to be held and feel safe and protected for once

- he’s just so used to protecting you, which he loves and insists on doing but sometimes just wants to feel safe and protected by you

- likes patting your head

- gabi adores you so much, you guys are besties at this point

- gabis just really happy Reiner could find somebody to care and love for, it’s about damn time

- does not like you fighting, but if you have to then you have to

- will spoil you and buy you whatever you want, he does it cause he wants to spoil you though...

- when gabi finds this out you know she’s coming along for your dates more often to just get something

- dates are as often as you and Reiner can have them, which is more than most of the characters I’ve written for already

- you being with Reiner comes with a lot of emotional baggage that he doesn’t wanna put on you, he’s put it on a lot of people and he’s gotten a lot of people killed (who died in order to protect him such as bertholdt and ymir and etc)

- just be there for him, he doesn’t need you to understand he just needs somebody to not see him as a complete piece of shit so he can feel less guilty about it

- he has so much guilt :(

- so much to the point he doesn’t wanna live in this life anymore, but you being there makes it easier for him to have a will to live, for you

- at this point in his life he goes along with whatever you want

- he hates the idea of being separated from you at all

- yeah he’s a clingy boy in his adult years because he knows his time is coming up

- when he dies he says he wants you to look after gabi

- while the idea of dying sooner makes him feel better, can’t say he likes the idea of leaving you though he is constantly at a conflict between whether he’s happy to be the armored titan because he gets to protect you, die sooner etc or if he hates it cuz he can’t live longer to be with you and actually grow old with you

- even with his short life span, he wants to marry you

- it’s his final wish

- deep down Reiner wishes you could’ve started a family ;(

- he tells you to forget about him when he dies and start a family though tbh

- he loves you so much

(S4 eren does not exist, the reason for that is the whole reason he became a shit head, I won’t spoil for the non manga readers or those that aren’t caught up with the manga, but yeah)

- this blushy boy can’t help the nervousness he feels around you and doesn’t always know what to say around you

- you make him at a loss for words honestly which isn’t like him

- he thinks about approaching you often, but he gets so tongue tied

- mikasa usually has to do the talking and we all know she isn’t the most talkative gal ever

- he might try to impress you, even in his titan form he tries to impress you

- especially if it’s early on and it’s a new development he’s gonna wanna show it off

- doesn’t like being babied (as shown with mikasa) so he might wanna be the one to protect you and do things for you

- would die at being complimented or touched in anyway by you

- people don’t give him enough credit, he’s lost his mother, he has lost other people he grew to care for, he’s a protective boy and is scared to lose you or fail you

- he is oblivious to any feelings that might be returned

- he is usually one to cling around often as well

- he feels comfortable being vulnerable and crying in front of you

- but he still wants to seem like he at least knows what to do and he can protect you and whatnot but truth is he’s really scared he’ll fail you like he did with his mother and hannes

- this will be a slowburn for a longtime unless you say something eren is a loser with this shit

- even with armin and mikasas encouragements he is scared to tell you

- so he simply asks you questions to see if he can get any indication that you love him back, or at the very least like him

- it takes awhile since he’s dumb but when he gets an answer he wants, he asks you out

- being in a relationship with eren means him constantly being at your side and attached to you at the hip

- if not soulmates why always together ??

- FR though

- he likes having an arm around you if you’re shorter, let’s not forget as an adult he’s 6’0

- kisses your cheek often

- jealousy is also often, he has a lack of confidence compared to others sometimes but it’s nothing that’s an issue or anything

- you teach him what freedom really is, the freedom to love somebody in full, unconditionally, the freedom to have that feeling and it being the most amazing feeling

- play with his hair, he loves it

- not so much when it starts to get really long just cuz it gets knots sometimes but brushing his hair and putting it up it always nice and he appreciates it

- can we all agree he looks better with his hair up

- forehead kisses if he’s taller, it’s likely to be a newer development since he was quite shorter/average height back then

- while he hates being babied, he will let you take care of him if he really needed it

- but mainly likes taking care of you

- neck kisses don’t have to be a sexual giving hickeys thing and eren is living proof since he loves giving cute neck kisses

- likes to grab your hands and just kiss em

- first of all, keep in mind this man is like in his early/mid 30s and now like almost 40

- he’s not gonna have this schoolboy crush, he thinks it’s childish

- at least that’s what he says

- he can be caught staring at you often, very often

- like he’s so obvious damn, but it looks like he’s glaring at you

- only hange and Erwin can tell that he likes you with his stares gonna be real!

- finds excuses for you to be around him, maybe that’s having you in his squad now, maybe it’s helping him clean, whatever it is he’s getting you

- so maybe in his own way clingy

- he often talks to you in a similar fashion that he does with Erwin and hange, somewhat more “casual” in Levi’s terms, or kinda “teasing” as teasing as a levi can be and it not sounding like teasing

- deep down worries for you often and is protective, eren is already protective enough because of who he has lost just think about Levi he literally loses everyone

- tries not to be overwhelmingly protective, it can be annoying and would make him obvious

- also if you think it’s impossible to make him blush think again all you gotta do is hug him, he doesn’t even hug back but still!

- eventually decides you could die at any moment, life is short, especially in this world

- so he just asks you out and gets it over with

- so now you date!

- it’s hard not to worry for Levi with the constant bullshit he goes through, but it does feel nice to have somebody worry about him so he takes it

- he just doesn’t like the idea of you worrying about him too much since he’s supposed to be humanity’s strongest, he wants you to have some hope/faith

- likes patting your head, doesn’t matter how tall you are compared to him

- nobody would have the balls to call him short except for you

- we all know he isn’t good at his emotions but he will allow himself to be soft and vulnerable when y’all are alone

- doesn’t tolerate pda

- he also keeps the relationship mainly secretive because you could become a target, he doesn’t care if eren and the others know though

- likes kissing your hand a lot, or your neck/collarbone

- totally into pressing your foreheads together he finds it nice

- he at least can hug back now but that takes a long time lol

- Yes. you can squish his cheeks. Will he be extremely annoyed? Yes. Will he do anything about it? No.

- he’s so soft for you? God

- has nightmares about losing you often, so you share the same room so he feels better knowing you’re alive next to him

- or you comforting him back to sleep works

- will buy you things if he can, likes spoiling you when he can but not toooo much

- if you suggest turning into a titan he says no

- while a part of him is like yeah a guaranteed 13 yrs he also is like no he wanna spend the rest of his days with you he cannot allow it

- yeahhhh so maybe he’s got some naive hopes, but this time he thinks he can achieve them and finish this shit ... he can only hope

- not enough people write for my best boy, sad day ;(

- him with a crush though? Let’s be real he blushes quite a bit it annoys him though especially if you ever comment on it

- you just make him all mushy and god he loves you so much

- hand on his smushed cheek with a goofy smile and just stares at you, this happens all the time

- Sasha loves to remind him of that like everytime he does it

- very defensive of you, if anyone disrespects you they are catching these hands

- so it is likely fights with Jean bc he disrespected you (even if he was joking) are often

- he always tries to make you laugh, especially when you’re going through a rough time. He wants to see you smile and laugh and hates seeing you sad at all

- probably flirts with you, but he makes it sound like a joke so it’s hard to take him seriously

- he’s protective if he has to be, he’s not as strong as others but he can hold his own very well. (He’s canonly the fastest or at least one of the fastest, so he can get you out of situations fast)

- is overall even more goofy around you than he normally is because he just wants you laughing

- he can be clingy even while just being friends, often finds excuses to hang around you

- gets teased a lot by Sasha and Jean about his rather obvious crush

- sometimes he just daydreams about you so if anyone hears him sigh dreamily or zone out they know it’s cuz he’s thinking about you

- like seriously daydreams about you so much, the only time he isn’t is when he’s around you (which even then it still happens sometimes) or during like fights where he could die at any moment

- would die at being touched physically, or being complimented

- he will be like “yeah ofc I am haha ;D” in a joking way, but he is dying on the inside

- gonna be real confessing takes a longer time than anyone on this list like even eren and Reiner because he is so scared of rejection and losing the friendship you have he holds it so close to him

- it’s extremely important since it’s not often he ever likes somebody? Plus you make him feel the happiest he’s ever felt like? Honestly he cannot do without you man

- when he finally does (thanks to Jean and Sasha pushing him to do so) he’s a blushing mess

- dating him though is wonderful, he’s attached to you at the hip, you guys are always together he hates being separated

- it’s annoying for everyone else though

- if you’re not around for some reason he doesn’t stfu about you

- he gets sad when you guys are apart ;(

- cheek kisses are often since they’re easy to give (it’s likely he’s shorter than you so just... easy cheek kiss... or because of the huge burst of height he gets as he ages he’s extremely taller and again cheek kisses are easy)

- loves hugging you, or just having his arms engulfed around you in some way

- terrible pickup lines? Absolutely. He’s mainly joking but sometimes he’s being serious

- before he’d do anything to make you laugh it’s even moreso now that you’re dating

- hand holding is often

- he is good at comforting you if need it

- would like to just be held after a tough day

- likes to hug you from behind

- loves kissing your hands <3

- my god if anyone is blushy it is Jean but I think we know this based off his interaction with mikasa

- cannot stop staring at you, at least Connie has some control and is just not aware of it. Jean is aware of his staring but has no self control.

- unlike Connie who has the confidence to jokingly flirt Jean doesn’t have that confidence. Acts like a cocky bastard but actually isn’t.

- probably says he made a move, or that he’s going to but hasnt and everyone knows it

- gets extremely nervous around you, palms sweaty, knees weak (arms are heavy)

- if you ever got hurt, protective mode (especially if it was to protect him cuz Christ he will lose it)

- scared to lose you, he lost Marco he doesn’t wanna lose you too

- he loves you so much, its come to the point where he can’t live without you. If you died he wouldn’t know what to do and he would probably go crazy without you around

- he’s always worried about you and watching out for you

- probably really jealous even before dating you, he’s constantly worried other people will have a better chance with you (if he noticed somebody else likes you he is all on that, he knows)

- he will try to impress you, also because of his jealousy but still. He wants to prove he can be good for you romantically

- so he’s constantly playing up how strong he is until you kick his ass in a fight

- however despite how nervous he gets around you, after some time he eventually is kinda himself. He doesn’t wanna seem like a dick around you so he acts overly nice but eventually you get close enough to where he can be himself

- likes to tease you sometimes

- probably calls you an idiot, especially if you are one or act like one at all. He don’t mean it but you know that.

- eventually will confess, because he’s sick of Sasha and connies teasing and lame attempts to be wingmen

- they’re so obvious abt it btw Sasha will just be there like “hey Jean y/n looks very cute today don’t you think so?” And Connie just nudges him, “yeah tell them how cute they are today, I think they look adoraaable” and he’s like “yes you’re very cute today” and then they just leave and make it awkward for you both

- when he tells you how he feels he’s stuttering so much, it’s painful

- dating Jean is still awkward, he’s still nervous but moreso that he might fuck up somehow and you’ll break it off with him

- eventually yeah, cuddlebug

- loves hugs

- clingy af

- mans can cook, you already know he cooking you something as much as he can

- loves giving you forehead kisses if you’re shorter, if not then cheek kisses are cool too

- before you dated he’d probably try to nervously compliment you and just stutter and die inside, in fact there was a time he didn’t talk to you at all because he never knew what to say

- he tries not to impress you as much but still does and is a jealous boy but less jealous cuz you’re dating him

- he needs constant reassurance

- he’s such a sweetheart deep down he is willing to do so much for you

- still calls you an idiot or any other nickname but more comfortable with it now that you’re dating and likes teasing you

- also eventually tells you how much he loves and cares for you, and tells you the extents of his love

- he loves always being around you and gets annoyed when Sasha and Connie tag along but you probably don’t mind

- he loves you though so he’s like . Ok

- he’ll follow you wherever you go tbh

- he’s also a blushy boy at times, especially if you’re in close proximity in some way

- complimenting him? Do you want him to pass out?

- I feel like people act like he’s overly mean to his crush but I don’t think he’d be mean. He’d try really hard to get along with them to the point where he might act like he likes the same stuff they do

- he’s clingy in general w/ you. Honestly not being around you for even a little feels like forever. Sometimes it’s just months before he can see you again, that hurts him ;(

- he’s such a softie deep down I can’t

- super protective as well (again I think everyone in aot is but mannn porco is so protective)

- he has seen some shit he knows what happens to people and he doesn’t want it happening to you

- very loyal to you tbh

- will find any excuse to touch you physically even if it puts a blush on his face, the first time he did he died but still... he liked the feeling and doesn’t ever wanna miss that feeling

- wraps an arm around you “casually” and “friendly” like all the time

- since him and pieck are pretty much always together, now it’s the three of you that are always together

- pieck finds it sweet though, and loves that he has somebody he could care for as much as he does

- ofc she tries to wingman, whenever he’s not around she asks you what you think of him. If you think of him as something more or what

- it’s because of one of your talks with pieck about porco does she finally encourage porco to tell you how he feels

- it takes awhile, he’s mainly worried of rejection or that he’ll lose you while you’re dating

- when you’re dating though, an arm around you at all times. If not holding your hand. (Ofc if you’re not currently discussing important matters)

- but yeah doesn’t mind pda, just not too much

- holds your hand if he is not having an arm around you

- kisses you like a lot, ofc when nobody else is around (or just pieck is around) but yknow

- he’s clingy, likes spending alone time w/ you but again wouldn’t mind if pieck was there

- gabi loves aww’ing at you guys and tbh so does pieck

- it does embarrass him sometimes but he loves you so he deals with it

- speaking of love he loves to remind you how much you mean to him and how much he loves you, he is not making the mistake of not letting you know how much he adores you

- teases tf outta you, like Jean would call you nicknames like idiot or something but he adores you too much for mean nicknames

- to make up for it he has pet names

- he’s also pretty jealous too btw

- make him feel better with lots of smooches

- he likes squishing your cheeks, surprisingly doesn’t mind if you do the same to him =)

- when cuddling he puts his face in either your chest or neck and peppers little kisses there

- pickup lines .. yeah they’re so bad he doesn’t care as long as they make you either blush or laugh

- low key just ... gently holds you, he loves u so much he’s so soft

#aot #aot x reader #attack on Titan #attack on Titan x reader #snk #snk x reader #porco galliard #porco x reader #porco galliard x reader #jean kirschstein #jean kirschtein headcanons #jean kirschtein x reader #connie springer #Connie x reader #Reiner x reader #levi ackerman #Levi x reader #eren yeager #Eren x reader

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butwhyduh · 3 years

Text

The maid

Part 2

Warning: attempted mugging, guns, briefly blood.

You might have worked in one of the nicest homes in all of Gotham, but your own place was much more modest. It was on the edge of the bad areas of Gotham but not quite labeled as unsafe. But then again, it’s Gotham. Is there a safe place here?

A second story walk up that had a fairly nice view of the park. If you stood in the left corner and stared just right. Okay, it was just fine but you were proud of your first roommate-free place. The Waynes paid well.

You had just gone to the grocery store and was queen of only-one-trip. So your arms were currently full. They might have been a little too full as you tried to pull out your key to the front door. You leaned a bag with your hip against the brownstone and tried to yank your key ring from your pocket. You had a distinct feeling that you weren’t alone. This made your hands shake a little and you tried harder to get at your key.

You weren’t alone.

There was approximately 2 people watching you. A mugger on the corner. His last 40 ounce drink of malt liquor was starting to wear off and he had a pounding headache from cursing out the mother of his children. How dare she try to force the brats on him on a Saturday night? He needed a few bucks because he was out of beer and he needed a cigarette. You looked like a perfect target.

The second was someone who could be even more dangerous. In black tactical pants, a black shirt with a red bat symbol, brown leather jacket, and a shiny red helmet, the Red Hood could easily be described as intimidating. And he was watching you. He’d been watching you for over a week.

Famous on the news, he had taken over part of Gotham’s underground and shook up other parts. He was known for shooting anyone who attacked children, women, or in any sexual way. If they were lucky, it was just in the kneecap. Currently Batman’s number one who-the-fuck-is-that-guy and a high priority. Was he a vigilante or a villain? All Batman knew was that the Red Hood was shaking everything up and targeting his Robin.

If it wasn’t for the bulletproof fabric that Alfred had just added to Robin’s costume, Tim Drake would be 6 feet under. As it was, he was out of commission for 2 weeks healing bruised ribs.

Red Hood watched you passively. Were you going to be fast enough to get inside before the mugger? He’d hate to have to save you. He would. You were a valuable commodity to him. You were the new maid for the Wayne Manor. If there was any way in, it was through you. The most likely weak link in security.

You dropped your keys and cursed quietly. It wasn’t quiet enough as it seemed to call the mugger to you. He started walking towards you. A box cutter in his pocket was pulled out and he yelled at you to stop. You made a sound that was somewhere between a yelp and a whimper and bent quickly to scoop up your keys. Items from your bag fell out in your haste.

Red Hood pulled out one of his backup guns. It was loaded with rubber bullets, one of the few non-lethal weapons he had. The man was almost on top of you before Jason pulled the trigger. The thug fell before he even touched you. You shrieked and looked around. You saw a flash of red on a roof top before it left. You hurried to open your door. Once in your apartment, you locked the door and put a chair in front of the door.

Over the next week, you had a really difficult time staying on task as you were barely sleeping. But seeing a certain member of the household had you hiding a smile as you worked.

You really did try to avoid Mr Timothy Drake-Wayne but he seemed to always walk down the hall that you were working in. You had long since laundered and returned his shirt. He would flash you the tiniest of smiles before continuing on his way. He was 3 years younger than you but somehow seemed worlds older.

One day you were helping Alfred cut up fruit in the kitchen. It was a calming task in the quiet room. A big plate of apples and oranges was quickly dispatched into slices.

“Hi,” Tim said suddenly beside you causing you to look up mid slice and jump.

“Shit,” you said holding your finger. You grabbed a paper towel and wrapped it up.

“I’m sorry! Is it bad?” Tim said. You held your finger over the sink to look at the cut. Blood welled quickly but it didn’t look super deep or long.

“It’s okay. It’s not too bad,” you told him. Tim dug in a drawer and pulled out a bandaid.

“Here, let me see your hand,” he said. He held your finger as he wrapped the bandage around it. You looked at his long dark eyelashes and small pieces of shiny black hair that fell in his eyes. He was certainly pretty.

“All better,” Tim said dropping your hand. You flushed at his closeness.

“Thanks,” you said looking at him. “Your shoulder, What happened?”

Tim had a large rectangular bandage over his left shoulder and you noticed a bruise under his right eye. He smiled awkwardly before gulping.

“I’ve been taking Brazilian Jui Jitsu classes and had a bit of the accident. I’m fine. Just a nasty bruise,” he said, glossing it over. “Probably should have stuck to CrossFit.”

“Maybe. Looks painful,” you said. You moved over to continue cutting fruit.

“You’re being careful when you go home, right?” He said suddenly. You looked at him confused.

“Yeah, why?”

“Just that there’s a new guy out there. Someone called the Red Hood. He’s been seen all over the city. Nobody really knows anything about him. I just- we just want to make sure you’re safe. We can provide a you with a ride home,” Tim suggested.

Yes you had heard about him. Killed drug dealers and rapists. He delivered a bag of heads to a crime family, rumors said. He had even attacked Batman and Robin a few times. Red Hood sounded terrifying. But you should be fine since you had nothing to do with any of Gotham’s underworld.

“I should be fine. But thank you, Mr Wayne,” you answered.

“Call me Tim. It wouldn’t be a hassle at all-“

“I’m fine. Thank you,” you said with finality. He nodded.

“Understood. I must get back to work. Sorry about your hand.”

“It’s okay.”

———————————

On one of your days off you decided to hit a used bookstore that was just down the road from your apartment. It was a cute little hidden gem. Books haphazardly piled on shelves to the ceiling. Tiny little rooms connected in a maze for each genre.

The bookstore was usually pretty empty and was the kinda place where you could sit and read on one of the hidden plush chairs they hide in various corners of the store. You could buy a cup of coffee from the front and spend an hour looking and reading. It was a pretty cozy place.

The prices were pretty cheap and after checking out your favorite section, you had a little stacks in one arm. In the other hand, you had a fresh iced coffee. You walked toward your favorite hidden chair in the back classics section. As you turned the corner, your coffee almost smashed into a body that quickly caught your hand and preventing the spill.

“Sorry! I wasn’t watching where I was going,” he said. You got a look of him. Tall and extremely fit. Wavy black hair and blue eyes with a little apologetic smile on his lips. He was hot as hell.

“It’s fine. I should have looked too,” you said and you both moved to the same side of the walkway. “Sorry,” you said with a smile.

“Nah, don’t be,” he said standing against the wall to let you slip by. “By the way,” he said as you squeezed past him. You stopped and looked at him.

“Can I ask your name?”

“Oh, sure,” you said before saying your name. He had a kind smile. Despite his large figure, his soft mannerisms and cozy sweater made him seem... safe.

“I’m Jason. That book in your hand is based on one of Shakespeare’s play. 12th Night. I saw a copy over here if you want to look at it,” he offered.

“Yeah, that’s interesting. You’re into classics?” You said. You watched as he reached up to grab the book from the top shelf. His sweater rose to show a strip of very tone skin.

“I’m kind of a sucker for them. The only problem is that they don’t really put out many new books,” Jason said with a shy smirk.

“That does sound like a problem,” you smiled back at him.

“I hope I’m not too forward, but can I have your number,” he asked playing with the spine of his book. You smiled and flushed. Did he really not know how hot he was? Because he acted like a nerd but looked like a snack.

“Yeah,” you said putting you number in his phone. “Then I can hit you up for more book recommendations.”

“I’d like that. I hate to go but I’ve got to get ready for work. That’s why I was in a hurry,” he admitted.

“I hope you aren’t late because of me.”

“Worth it. But I’ll be fine. See you around,” he said leaving.

“Yeah,” you called after him. Did you just give your number to an absolute 10? You had a little smile on your face for the rest of the afternoon.

#Tim drake x reader #Red Robin x reader #robin x reader #batboy x reader #the maid

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natromanxoff · 3 years

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Queen live at Forest National in Brussels, Belgium - August 24, 1984

Some parts of the Hammer To Fall promo video were filmed during this show - the camera was filming the audience reactions during TYMD, Radio Ga Ga and Hammer To Fall. On the next day 20 fans from the Dutch fan club were invited to come again to the filming of the promo video.

At the gig, the band asked the audience to return the following day for the shoot. However, most likely assuming it was all a joke, the vast majority stayed away; in fact only a dozen fans turned up. Undeterred, the shoot went ahead anyway, with the band's performance that day interspersed with footage shot the previous night.

(x)

This is the first show of The Works tour.

According to the July '89 issue of Record Collector, Queen ran through about 40 songs during rehearsals. This list of songs rehearsed that didn't end up in the setlist comes from someone who worked on the tour:

Great King Rat (longer version), Brighton Rock (full song), I'm In Love With My Car, Sweet Lady, White Man, We Will Rock You (fast), Play The Game, Need Your Loving Tonight, Put Out The Fire, Las Palabras de Amor, Life Is Real (both Freddie solo piano and Freddie/Brian acoustic duet versions)

The keyboardist for this tour (and also the '86 Magic tour) is session musician Spike Edney. He would also lend some vocals to many songs and play rhythm guitar in Hammer To Fall. He and Roger Taylor would form a band called "The Cross" in 1987 which spawned three albums, and he would return to Queen in the 21st century to play on the tours with Paul Rodgers and Adam Lambert.

Spike was recruited in a very informal way by a Queen associate. He went to Munich for their first rehearsal in early August, wound up partying for most of the first night, and missed the first day's rehearsal. It later transpired that everyone else had. He recalls, "The next day, we all managed to get to it eventually, to the first rehearsal, and all the gear was set up. The stage was huge, and I thought "Oh well, here we go then" and we got to the first song , and what I'd forgotten was that they hadn't actually played together for two years. So they said, OK, let's try one of the new songs, I think it was Radio Ga Ga, and we started playing it, and course, I knew it, I'd been studying it for weeks. You know, 1,2,3,4 and we start and we get about a minute into the song and the whole thing collapses. And they all look at each other, you know, very sheepishly, and they say, "Anyone know how it goes?" and I say "well, actually, I know. I know how it goes" and they said "Ah". And so I started showing them the chords and everything and Fred looked at me and said "You don't know the words, do you?" and "Well, yeah I do actually" so then they all came round the piano and we spent the whole day just going through songs, and I thought, "I'm gonna be all right here, this'll be OK"!"

The show started very late, as the band were still doing soundcheck when they were supposed to go on. Apparently over the previous week there were few occasions when all four band members actually showed up for rehearsal. Many songs (likely those listed above) never made the setlist, and soundcheck was an extensive cramming session, particularly for the older material that they hadn't played in years.

Roger Taylor later reflected that this European tour was one of his favourites, and many fans cite the early Works setlist as their favourite ever played by the band. Three medleys are now played, two of which have revived many old songs: Killer Queen, Seven Seas Of Rhye, Keep Yourself Alive, Liar, Stone Cold Crazy and Great King Rat. Staying Power from Hot Space returns to the set, as does Sheer Heart Attack from News Of The World. Only half of Staying Power is played, and it runs into Dragon Attack, followed by an improvisation running into a more compact version of Now I'm Here compared to previous tours.

Many people who attended shows on this tour recall Queen having a very heavy sound, especially on songs like Liar and Stone Cold Crazy. By 1984 they had gained a reputation as being one of the best live rock acts in the business.

Six songs from The Works are performed each night, and the introduction tape is from the album track "Machines". After the heavy G chords are heard on the tape twice, the band walk on stage in the darkness to play the chords the third time, which leads into the brand new "Tear It Up". This is yet another effective opening to a Queen show, something they would perfect time and time again.

I Want To Break Free is performed each night in 1984-85 as the first encore, with Freddie coming on stage sporting a pair of huge plastic breasts under a pink shirt. Part way through the song, he would remove the breasts and twirl them around for a while before finally throwing them into the audience. Some souvenir! As a result of this gag, Another One Bites The Dust has been moved from the encore to be earlier in the set.

This tour showcases an incredible lighting rig and an overall setup mimics the movie Metropolis, from which scenes were used for the promo video of Radio Ga Ga last year. The huge wheels behind the stage (modelled after the ones on The Works album cover) rotate at mostly random times - usually because they are turned manually by various crew members such as Roger's tech Chris "Crystal" Taylor whenever they have a free moment (Freddie Mercury's assistant Peter Freestone told the tale in 2021):

“Yeah, I mean Rio was… amazing. The feeling from that crowd… you know, something like 350,000 people. Oh, you can’t beat that. And when you’re flying in a helicopter over that crowd, it was stunning. But the thing is, I know this sounds really, really stupid but [laughs]… one thing I will always, always remember from that tour was, remember, in the back of the stage you had these wheels that turned every now and then, not constantly but just every now and then. That was because there was… the guy looking after Roger’s drums and me who actually turned those wheels. And there was no set cue or anything that, “Oh, it has to start on this bar, on this song.” No, it was when he wasn’t doing anything and I wasn’t doing anything, we’d say “Ok, let’s go and do it.” And we turned the wheels for a couple of minutes and then left them alone. He had then to do something for Roger and I would just sit there like I always did. And then you’d go back and you’d turn the wheels, like a hamster. We were like hamsters…”

However, a crew member who worked on the tour recalls otherwise: "I do know local crew members were used on the UK shows and certainly (a number of) European gigs. The other thing is that Radio Ga Ga had a set piece with the cogs and lighting, using low ambient lighting and strobes to emphasise mechanical motion of the cogs during the instrumental break. Would Roger Taylor be happy with no one covering him/his kit during a show? Possibly Peter Freestone is remembering production rehearsals when any spare bodies might have been asked to operate the cogs?"

During vocal improvisations on this tour, Freddie would often include bits of "Foolin' Around" and "Living On My Own" from his pending first solo album, which he had been working on during this period.

Freddie now plays a Telecaster for Crazy Little Thing Called Love. It would remain like this through the Magic tour.

The band no longer bring a gong with them on the road. Roger now does a cymbal roll at the end of Bohemian Rhapsody.

A fan recalls hearing the band running through Tear It Up whilst queuing up to enter the venue.

Freddie's voice is in superb shape for this show, but it will quickly weaken as the tour progresses. As incredible as Freddie Mercury was, he certainly did not take care of his voice at times, especially in the mid-80s. After a couple years of heavy smoking, Freddie's voice now sounds a lot deeper and raspier overall.

Before It's A Hard Life, Freddie says, "I think tonight we're gonna do songs from just about every album that we've ever made. You heard some very early stuff from the first album. Right now I think we're gonna do something very new, and we'll see what you think of it."

Freddie does a vocal exchange with the audience before Staying Power, singing "Get Down Make Love" and "Gimme Some Lovin" a few times. The band would improvise bits of the latter a couple times in 1986.

This is the only show on the entire Works tour where Roger plays regular acoustic drums on Another One Bites The Dust (before which Freddie teases the audience with a bit of Mustapha). For the rest of the tour, he'd play electronic drums. He'd also integrate the electronic drum kit into a few other songs, like at the beginning of Hammer To Fall, where one might argue that his sounds don't appropriately complement the guitar to create the intense, heavy sound.

The band sound very tight on this opening night of the tour, with the only exception being the rough transition from Stone Cold Crazy to Great King Rat. The keyboard and guitar solos are integrated together for the first few shows of the tour, during which Brian plays a few bits from Machines. Spike Edney uses his vocoder (a Roland VP-330) for the "machines" and "back to humans" lines heard throughout the tour during this spot (he would use his vocoder for the "radio" lines in Radio Ga Ga as well). After this segment, Brian then gets a few minutes to play on his own as usual.

Parts of the promo video for Hammer To Fall were filmed during this show. Claims from some (even official) sources state that Freddie invited the audience back for (what would actually be "additional") filming the following day aren't true. Here is all that Freddie had to say before the song: "This next song we're gonna use in our next video. So everybody just go mad and maybe later you'll see one of you guys inside the video one day. Oh, just go crazy, take your clothes off. It's called Hammer To Fall." After the song, he simply says, "Good night, you guys!" as that was the last song of the set.

Here is a fan's recollection: "On the night of the gig, there was a camera mounted on an arm that would swing over the front rows of the audience during a few songs. These audience shots were taken during Tie Your Mother Down, Radio Ga Ga, and Hammer To Fall itself. I guess they also had a camera up in the box at the back of the hall [as there are a few shots of both the audience and the band]. I don't remember any cameras onstage during the gig - just the one mounted on the arm."

The Dutch fan club invited only about twenty of its members to attend the video shoot the next day. They were instructed by a roadie to sit quietly on a chair and not to move or approach the band members. After a few hours, Brian came over and had a chat with them, checking to see if they were enjoying themselves and if they were hungry. He then promptly ordered them some take-out!

A minute of Tie Your Mother Down from this show was later broadcast on the Belgian TV station "RTBF" (x) (x). An audience-shot video allegedly exists as well, containing five songs.

After years of speculation, the existence of more footage from this show was proven when bits of it were included in the promo video for Let Me In Your Heart Again in 2014. About 30 seconds of Somebody To Love (largely crowd shots) were seen. There is, however, no accompanying audio. (x)

The first photo is from the autumn 1984 Queen fan club magazine. Brian is seen with a watchful eye over the proceedings. Tour manager Gerry Stickells and his wife are also in the shot.

Pics 2 through 6 were submitted by Alessio Rizzitelli, and the seventh pic was taken by Dave Matkin.

(x)

#queen #queen band #roger taylor #freddie mercury #brian may #john deacon #queen concerts

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jobean12-blog · 4 years

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Fool in the Rain

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 1,429

Summary: Bucky comes to your rescue or maybe you come to his.

Author’s Note: This is for the HBC’s @the-ss-horniest-book-club continuation of drunk drabbles and the lovely prompt below from @buckys-henley Thank you for sending it in and to all the people on the west coast experiencing these fires, I’m sending my love to you always and please stay safe and be well and reach out if you need, I’m here! I had this idea while driving home yesterday and the prompt came in and I thought it would work well. Thank you all for reading and much love always! ❤❤❤

Warnings: Soft and shy Bucky, protective Bucky, sweet fluffy goodness, blushes and soft touches, kisses in the rain :)

“Hey Buck, what are you staring at?” Steve asks, trying to follow his line of sight but there are too many people in the bar. Sam leans back in his chair and looks around, finding you seated by the bar. “Oh, the lady in red. I can see why she has your attention Barnes.” Bucky drops his eyes to his beer, ignoring Sam. Steve’s elbow nudges Bucky’s and some of the beer spills over, “why don’t you go say hi. I don’t see a boyfriend around.”

Bucky looks up at his two friends, eyes wide and his cheeks already turning pink. “I think I’ll just have another beer,” he mumbles, standing quickly and walking to the other end of the bar. “He has a full beer right in front of him,” Sam says, shaking his head. “It’s funny to see him like this, he was quite the ladies’ man back in the 40’s.” Both Sam and Steve laugh, trying to cover it up when they see Bucky returning.

“What’s so funny?” Sam presses his lips together but can’t stop the words, “Steve said you were a ladies man way back when. What the hell happened?” Bucky scoffs, letting his eyes drift over to you once again. “Shit” he grinds out, watching as you talk animatedly with some tall guy. “Too slow, Pal, told ya you should have went to say hi.”

Bucky glares at Steve, about to tell him off when his super solider hearing picks up on a distressed voice. He swings his head your way to see you push off the stool and back away from the guy. Your face is scrunched up in anger and you’re clearly upset. Bucky rushes over, picking up on a few words as he gets closer. “Hey asshole, I said no thank you. Can you please leave me alone?” The guy inches closer, his hand reaching out to touch you.

You swat it away, “I didn’t say you could touch me, take a hint!” Before the guy can make another stupid move, Bucky has him by the shirt collar, easily lifting him off the floor with his metal arm. “Hey dickhead, do you not understand what no means?” The guy starts to kick his feet and try to find footing and you giggle behind Bucky. He smiles, dropping the guy to the floor and turning to you.

“Are you ok?” You meet his eyes with an appreciative smile, “I am, thank you.” Your eyes quickly shift over Bucky’s shoulder and you open your mouth to scream and tell him to look out because the guy is about to throw a punch but Bucky turns just in time and stops him mid swing, twisting his hand awkwardly until the guy yells and flinches away. “What the fuck?”

The guy stares at Bucky’s metal arm while he rubs his wrist, “I guess you’re into freaks.” You slide up next to Bucky and take his metal hand in yours, holding it tightly and kissing his cheek. “Well I’m definitely not into douchebags.” With that you spin and walk from the bar, dragging Bucky behind you.

When the cool night air hits your skin you sigh in relief, not letting go of Bucky’s hand and smiling up at him. “Thank you again. I appreciate you coming to my rescue…” You motion for more, hoping he’ll give you a name. He shuffles on his feet, rubbing the back of his neck with his other hand, “James Barnes, but you can call me Bucky.”

You stand on your tippy toes and kiss his cheek again, finally releasing his hand. “Thank you again Bucky. It’s nice to meet you, I’m y/n.” Bucky’s mouth opens and closes like a fish, his blush hard to hide even behind the scruff that lines his cheeks. “It’s really nice to meet you too and you’re welcome,” He finally manages to say, audibly swallowing while he stares at you. “You looked like you were handling him just fine but then he had to get touchy and I couldn’t let that happen.”

You grab his hand again and start walking down the street. “Well, maybe but you handled it better. So, I hope I’m not keeping you from your friends back there” He looks at your intertwined hands in astonishment before answering, “nah, they’re fine. I’m not uh, keeping you from anyone or a date or um a guy or a friend or maybe you wanna be alone.” He keeps rambling, fumbling over his words and slowly squeezing your hand tighter.

You stop walking and trace your fingers along his jaw, “no, none of those things, looks like you’re stuck with me.” He gives you a lopsided grin, “I’m pretty sure it’s me you’re stuck with.” Beaming, you start swinging your arm, taking his along with it. “Sounds good to me, you did rescue me after all. And just for the record, Bucky, I don’t think you’re a freak. I’m sorry he said that to you.” He’s quiet for a moment, slowing his pace, “thanks, I’m glad you don’t.”

“I’m happy you were there,” you say sweetly, your eyes widening when an idea hits you. “Hey!” you shout, turning to face him, “wanna get some ice cream!?” He laughs, a real genuine laugh where his eyes crinkle at the corners and his nose scrunches up and you can’t help but smile, silently thanking the d-bag at the bar for bringing you Bucky.

“That sounds perfect, doll.” You squeal in happiness and keep walking down the street, chatting away about everything and nothing. The next two hours fly by in a flurry of yumminess, lots of smiles and soft touches. You try to touch him every chance you get, loving how his cheeks are permanently pink.

“So, what do we do now?” you ask, licking the last of your ice cream from the spoon and throwing it in the garbage. A cool wind blows and you involuntarily shiver, rubbing your hands up and down your arms. Bucky quickly takes off his denim jacket and drapes it over your shoulders, pulling it tight around your chest. “Thanks,” you whisper, standing in place and swinging your hips back and forth to make the arms fly out.

He grabs them and starts to tie them together, the both of you laughing way too loud for 1 am. When he finally gets you cocooned in the jacket, he looks you over, smiling smugly at his work. The first raindrop hits his nose and rolls off, the two of you looking upward just as more drops start to fall, the sky opening up moments later in a downpour.

You’re shrieking and trying to get the arms of his jacket untied so you can drape it over your head. Bucky is trying to help but neither of you can stop laughing and by the time you’re free you’re both soaked. Still smiling he takes a step closer and pushes some wet hair from your face. You watch the droplets of water collect on his long lashes and meet him halfway, closing the gap between your bodies.

He doesn’t speak and takes your hand in his, resting it against his chest while the other curls around your waist. He starts to slowly sway back and forth in the street, the sounds of the rain and the city beating in rhythm with your heart. “Are you cold?” he leans in to ask, bringing his lips close to your ear. “No, I’m very warm actually, thank you.”

He nods and starts to pull away, but you reach up to cup his cheek, gently tugging his face closer. A drop of rain runs down your face and settles on your upper lip. Your tongue darts out to lick it off and Bucky’s eyes darken, his thumb swiping over the spot. His touch leaves fire in its wake and you need him to kiss you, tilting your head and barely touching his lips in a silent invitation.

It’s all the encouragement he needs to press his lips to yours, the rain all but forgotten as he holds you in his arms, dancing under the soft glow of the streetlight. The rain doesn’t stop and neither does Bucky, his tongue exploring your mouth and his hands combing through your hair. When you finally come up for air, your hands circle his neck and you rest your forehead to his. He nuzzles your nose and kisses along your jawline and up to you ear, sending shivers down your spine with his whispered words, “can we do that again?”

@aesthetical-bucky @auro-ora @bugsbucky @bucky-on-my-mind @buckys-henley @buckstaybucky @breezy1415 @buckys-broody-muffin @buckys-minty-breath @book-dragon-13 @chuuulip @eurynome827 @hiddles-rose @hailmary-yramliah @hawksmagnolia @ikaris-whore @imgaril-lindru @itsunclebucky @jhangelface0523 @jewels2876 @loricameback @lorilane33 @addikted-2-dopamine @lokilvrr @littledarlinhavefaithinme @littleredstarfish @mushyjellybeans @marvelandotherfandomimagines @marvelgirl7 @nano--raptor @pinkdiamond1016 @randomfandompenguin @sallycanwait68 @softpeachbarnes @tuiccim @this-kitten-is-smitten @the-wayward-robot @yansi1923

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silverarmedassassin · 3 years

Text

Clandestine Meetings - One

Actor!Bucky x Reader | Word Count: 2488 | Warnings: None

A/N: Listen, I know I said this would be posted in "about an hour," but I have no self-control and it must be posted NOW.

Sorry for the delay in getting this out! I was having a bit of block. Thank you for reading and, if you feel so inclined, please let me know what you think!❤️ If you want to be tagged, please send me a message or enter your url here!

Dividers by the lovely @firefly-graphics

[ Previous | Masterlist | Next ]

It’s 10:30 by the time your boss stumbles into the office. Pepper Potts is usually the embodiment of poised and put together - sleek strawberry blonde hair either falling over her shoulders in beautiful waves or tied in a high ponytail; black pencil skirts and white blouses tucked neatly inside. But not today.

While the ponytail still sits high on her head, dark circles taint her usually smooth, pristine complexion. She’s fisting a to-go mug in one hand and her office mug in the other, already steaming with a fresh round of caffeine.

You hated days like these; mornings after Tony keeps her out late - either business or pleasure, you never know as you prefer not to pry into your bosses’ personal lives - were always interesting, to say the least. Pepper was never mean, and you were almost positive there wasn’t an unkind bone in her body. She was just off. And if she was off, it means you were off, resulting in your job being about one hundred times harder as you often had to play the roles of both assistant and editor.

“Good morning, Ms. Potts,” you finally greet as she sits down at her desk. She’s rummaging through her bag, growing more irritable as the seconds pass. She sighs before stopping to look up at you.

“Y/N, please. It’s been six months. Just call me Pepper.” You internally scoff at the insistence of being anything less than professional towards one of the smartest women you’ve ever encountered in your life, and she turns back to her treasure hunt. “Don’t tell me I left my laptop at home,” she whines to herself as she slumps down into her large executive chair.

You clear your throat as you shuffle forward, computer in hand. “You had me take down to IT to get your files backed up, remember?” you smile as you deposit the device on the cherry-oak desk.

Pepper returns the smile and shakes her head. “Honestly, I don’t understand how I functioned before you.” She slides the laptop across the desk and opens it. While she waits for the software to boot up, she starts her typical morning rapid-fire session. “Did I miss any calls before I came in?”

“No, it’s been pretty q-word this morning.” You vowed never to say “quiet” while in the office. It somehow always jinxed your days, resulting in everyone and their mother calling within twenty minutes.

“E-mails?”

“The chef you’ve been in contact with sent over his schedule for the next few months. It’s looking like the best time to meet is early next month if you want to get the feature done in time for the winter edition.” Pepper opens her mouth to fire another question, but you’re one step ahead of her. “I’ve already blocked out a date in your calendar and sent the invite to his team.”

A soft smile graces the woman’s face as she scribbles notes in her daybook. “And what does my schedule look like for today?”

You sort through the mental files that contain minute-to-minute information regarding your boss’s workday. “You’re pretty booked. You have that photoshop with James Barnes at noon, and after-”

“Shit,” Pepper mummers, cutting you off. Panic quickly settles into her features. “Why does Tony do this? Barnes is impossible to book for anything. I can’t miss this….”

“Uh, no, you can’t,” you practically screech as you fix your boss with a wild look. “This photoshoot has been on your schedule since before I even started. And the time you have set up with him next week doesn’t allow for a full interview, photoshoot, and get material for the short online feature.” You try not to let the panic come out in your voice, but this is precisely the kind of incident you were hired to prevent.

Pepper gently closes her laptop and sets her features in a serious look. “Listen, I think you’re doing a great job here, and you’ve grown so much within the few months you’ve been on the team.” You eye her suspiciously, wondering if this was your ‘you’re fired’ speech. If so, it was definitely coming out of left field. “Why don’t you take my place at the shoot today? If Tony hadn’t promised I’d be in attendance for this investor meeting today, I’d have you go to that instead. But,” the blonde sighs deeply before continuing, “Tony has no regard for anyone’s schedule, and this is an important meeting.”

Your stomach drops from the 44th floor you’re currently on down to ground level. You’d never been on a set before, let alone one with someone as big as James. Plus, you’d only been on a handful of mid-sized interviews. How did she expect you to do this by yourself?

“Pepper, I…”

“I know what you’re going to say. You’re going to try and tell me that you’re not ready and that you can’t possibly clear your schedule for the afternoon. But if I didn’t think you were capable of holding your own, you wouldn’t even be sitting here with ‘assistant editor’ in front of your name. You have the skillset; you just need to show that you can use it. I know you don’t want to be an assistant forever.”

You anxiously bite your lip, feelings of inadequacy and anxiousness filling your senses.

“I don’t even know this James guy…” you say, defeated.

“Well, the car doesn’t arrive for another,” she looks down at her phone, “forty-five minutes. You better get reading.”

“We really need to bring you into the twenty-first century,” Natasha, Bucky’s manager, says as the first notes of My Funny Valentine start dancing through today’s set.

Following the too-bright flash of the camera, Bucky blinks the starbursts out of his eyes and tries to set the redhead with as stern of a look as possible. “Don’t you dare diss Mr. Sinatra. He’s a classic. A legend!” He watches as a stylist runs up and begins fussing with his hair.

Natasha just rolls her eyes and goes back to scrolling through her phone. As much as she acts annoyed with him - and his insistence of having at least two dozen 40’s songs on every photoshoot playlist - he knew she wouldn’t trade him for the world. They had a long history pre-dating the entertainment industry, and she was damn good at her job. If it wasn’t for Nat, Bucky’s not sure his current agency would have even signed him.

As the stylist finishes up her poking and prodding, the photographer - who Bucky has already forgotten the name of - begins shouting out directions from behind the camera. Pose this way. Turn that way. Make it look like you want to be here. It takes everything in Bucky not to grimace - both at the consistent reconfiguring he has to do to his body and the loud rumble that echoes through his stomach. The shirtless pictures they were shooting today caused him - against his better judgment - to forgo breakfast and, with nothing but too-weak black coffee in his system, Bucky couldn’t help but feel a little agitated.

“Just a few more shots, and then we can break for lunch,” he hears the man behind the camera shout before dragging the camera back up to his face.

Bucky contorts himself into a position that shows off the abs he’s worked incredibly hard to achieve and maintain and masks his face in the perfect moody smolder these magazines love so much. Three more pops of the shutter, some grumbling and direction by the photographer, and one more position change, and he’s finally free.

As he’s looking at the pictures and throwing a robe over his bare torso and boxer-clad bottom, Bucky’s attention is pulled from the camera’s tiny screen to the back of the spacious room by Natasha’s stern, Russian-lilted voice. The accent only came out when she was agitated, so the sound alone is often used as a warning sign to those closest to her to stay away.

“How did you even get up here? Is there no security in place? I swear-”

Bucky turns to find his manager - all five-foot-three inches of her - standing defensively in front of whomever she’s cornered by the elevator.

“As I said, I’m here in place of Ms. Potts.” Bucky perks up at the second voice; is almost positive he recognizes the sweet melody despite having only encountered it once several months before. “Here, look, I have my badge.”

Sure enough, as Bucky scurries over to the duo, he sees a familiar face anxiously looking at his manager. He might be terrible with names, but Bucky Barnes rarely forgets a face.

“Natasha, why do you insist on harassing every person who sets foot within a five-foot radius of me while on the job?” Bucky jokes as he approaches the women.

He watches as your attention shifts from the annoyed redhead to him; a look of shock and maybe a hint of mortification flashes across your face.

“I wasn’t harassing. This is a closed set, and randos from the street can’t just walk on up,” Natasha rolls her eyes. “And it’s not you I’m worried about. It’s...you. But you know what I mean!”

He does. After all, protecting his privacy and work is one of Bucky’s most significant concerns. That doesn't mean he isn’t going to tease Natasha any chance he gets. He playfully scoffs and turns his attention to you. “I see you got the job. I told you everything was going to work out.”

Bucky can’t help but preen at the way you anxiously tuck a non-existent stray hair behind your ear and bite your lip. “You were right. Mr. Stark isn’t as intimidating as I thought. Although,” you playfully roll your eyes, “he is a menace. He promised Pepper’s attendance at a meeting, so now you’re stuck with an inexperienced interviewer rather than the queen of journalism.”

“Bah!” Bucky exclaims. “I’m sure you’ll do great. Plus, you’re not the one half-naked in the situation. If anyone embarrasses themselves, it’ll be me.”

Natasha chortles at the comment, mumbling something the sounds a lot like, “ever the charmer,” before walking away. At the same time, Bucky doesn’t miss the way your gaze slowly skims down his cotton-clade body before snapping back up to his face.

“Come on. We just broke for lunch, and Stark spares no expense when it comes to the spreads.”

It’s well past six-thirty in the evening when you finally make it back to your building. Despite the exhaustion flowing through your veins and the grumble in your stomach reminding you every five minutes that you haven’t eaten since lunchtime, there’s a festive air to your being, a proverbial pep to your step that could only be the result of a successful first interview experience.

Yeah, you were a nervous wreck before and during the interview, but you walked away feeling amazing about yourself - and with three pages worth of phenomenal, touching, and personal quotes from the one and only Bucky Barnes.

You try to ignore the butterflies that erupt low in your belly at the thought of the blue-eyed god of a man. Despite having no other experience interviewing someone with as large of a celebrity as he, you’ve concluded that Bucky is an angel of an interviewee. He was polite, answered all of your questions, and flirted just a little. Or, at least that’s what you would call it if you were anyone but a lowly editorial assistant who still purchased from bargain bins because that’s all you could afford. In all reality, Bucky was a very smooth talker with the confidence to back it up. It explained the incomprehensible hype surrounding the man you had no idea was such a big deal less than twelve hours prior.

The rumble of your stomach pulls you back to reality as you unlock your apartment door. You push the thoughts of Bucky to the back of your mind, settle for finishing unpacking the day for when you’re unwinding for bed. Right now, all you want to focus on is fo-

“Uh, hello!” your roommate Wanda screeches as you push open the door. The redhead is standing, arms crossed, in your entry, a look of disdain on her face. “When were you going to tell me, your best friend and roommate, who pays half the rent and utilities, mind you, that Bucky Barnes followed you on Instagram. James Bucky Barnes, Y/N!”

You freeze at the mention of the man who has taken up every inch of your mind since you left the shoot earlier that day. You deposit your keys onto the small table next to the door and try to act as nonchalant as possible. “What are you talking about, Wanda?”

Your roommate starts wagging her phone in front of your face before pulling it back so she can read off her screen. “Well, I follow these gossip blogs - just for fun, of course. I like to stay up-to-date with all the celebrity goings-on.” You fix Wanda with an unamused look as you pass by on the way to the kitchen. “And I was scrolling through, catching up on today’s gossip, and all of a sudden, I see a screenshot of your Instagram account!”

You freeze mid-reach for a saucepan and turn to look at her. “What?”

“Yea, see,” Wanda holds her phone out so you can see the screen. Low and behold, there your account is; questionably composed landscape shots of the city and poorly-lit food pics in all their glory. “It started to circulate this afternoon after someone saw he followed you! Why did he follow you?”

You slowly resume your task of reheating last night’s spaghetti as you answer her. “I...I don’t know? I met him at work this afternoon. He probably just followed me because of Stark.” You shrug despite the thrill that runs through your body.

You halfheartedly listen as Wanda blabs on about the crush she’s apparently had for years despite never having once mentioned it to you, too focused on running through the day’s events to care much about how she’s seen every single one of his films at least a dozen times.

Maybe he had been flirting with you? His manager did mention he flirts with anything with a heartbeat, so it was most likely just part of his personality. Or at least the role he played in public. You weren’t naive enough to think that who Bucky presented himself as to the media, fans, and others not in his inner circle was the real Bucky. After all, he was likely just trying to win you over so you’d write something good about him.

Still, you can’t help the giddy smile that creeps across your face as, when you finally lie down for the night, you open the Instagram app to find Bucky’s name and verified status among the several notifications awaiting you.

@redbarn1995 @juenenfeu

#bucky x reader #actor!bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #actor au #bucky barnes au #bucky x you #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfic

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doloresdraws · 3 years

Photo

| time-lapse of the painting on my youtube |

❤ I wrote these for Twitter, but decided to post them here as well ❤

Werner Adler, Nosferatu residing in San Francisco, Embraced in 1970 in his mid 30s.

1. Werner is pretty chill most of the time, more than angry he gets frustrated from not being satisfied with his writing or when he says something that makes complete sense, yet the other person still fails to acknowledge it, especially when it is about something important.

2. I think he never believed in soulmates, until he met Leslie. Now when she is gone, a part of him is gone too.

3. His pet peeves: When people call themselves stupid or speak about themselves in a degrading way, especially women and children. Also when he sees grammar mistakes like they're/their, etc.

4. Unfortunately, what used to be his happy place now brings him a lot of pain, so he rarely allows his thoughts to venture there. When Leslie was still alive and he thought she was living a happy, fulfilled life somewhere, he often thought about their life together.

5. He has suffered from depression since his teens, but his happiest time was when Leslie said yes to his clumsy proposal, they got married and were planning their future together. Despite his coming and going depression and some bad days, she made him very happy.

6. His least happy time: Finding out that Leslie was dead, running to the hospital morgue and seeing and holding her lifeless body in his arms.

7. I think he is neither. He would sit at the bar minding his own business.

8. As a mortal, he never had any serious physical injuries (mainly because he was at home most of the time) As a vampire he got his wrist broken by the Gangrel who had found him after the Embrace, Werner didn't understand anything and wanted to just run away.

9. He doesn't really remember his Embrace as he was passed out sleeping, so the Embrace itself isn't a traumatic experience for him. There is a lot he would rather forget during his Kindred existence, but nothing tops his desperate attempt of Embracing Leslie's dead body.

10. His childhood wasn't exactly filled with many good memories. His parents argued a lot and it ended up in divorce that left him living with his quite overprotective mother. His fav memory would probably be time he spent hanging out with his best friend, a neighbor kid Mike.

11. Honestly, no, he doesn't have a type. He was seriously in love only with Leslie. They had a connection right away as she as an artist understood his need to be sometimes left alone with his writing and at the same time possessed quite a different, more positive outlook in life.

12. A pen that he bought from his first salary. Lucky for him, he was able to keep it even after his Embrace. Also his and Leslie's wedding rings and her journal that he stole after sneaking into her husband's hotel room and going through her things.

13. +14. No tattoos or piercings, even if he wasn't a Kindred/Nosferatu he wouldn't even consider it. He is quite old school, he doesn't really like them.

15. He had his dream house already. Not long before he got Embraced, he and Leslie had bought a house in a small town in Maine. It wasn't much, but they had so many plans for the garden and for the kid's rooms.

16. I think others, especially Kindred of other clans wouldn't probably expect him to be so well-mannered, gentle and well-spoken considering his dishevelled, unclean looks. He just sees no point in showering or caring for his look when he isn't really socializing with anyone anyway.

17. He is very thoughtful when it comes to gifts. He is that kind of person that would give you a present out of the blue, just because he would see something that he thinks you would enjoy.

18. He has a love-hate relationship with his writing. Some days he thinks he is really good at capturing the right mood with his words, other days he is questioning his writing skills and if he should even continue. He isn't proud of anything that he does, unfortunately.

19. A stranger would probably describe him as a sad man who desperately needs a bath and new clothes.

20. A close friend (Kayley) would describe him as kind & caring, but broken man who is trying his best and tries to do the right things.

21. He actually isn't concerned about his looks at all, he didn't care much about his looks even when he looked normal. His biggest insecurity is fear that somehow deep inside he is a bad person and that he somehow deserves what happened.

22. Physical: dexterity, non-physical: Intelligence.

23. If he knew that the lie was for his own good, he would actually appreciate the thought. If it was a lie to spare him from fear (I am looking at you Kayley) he would get upset at the sheer irresponsibility and the harm that could have happened and you would be in for a lecture.

24. He doesn't care much for the weather when he's spending most of his nights alone in his sewer haven, but he finds rainy nights inspiring and accurate to his own feelings of despair. He sometimes goes to the cemetery when it pours, stands in the rain and allows himself to cry.

25. He has no problems saying I love you to the people that he cares about when it feels right and appropriate to the situation. Though he usually never says it first, but more as a response :)

26. He doesn't like to talk about his worries - like when he was a mortal he really didn't like to talk about his fear of not having enough skill to make it as a writer, as he felt like he was failing Leslie to not make enough money for them to be able to raise a family.

27. He murdered a man that was a threat to Kayley and Jane. He really thought that there wasn't another way, but he sent the children away while he did it, so they didn't have to see. He was on the verge of frenzy and part of him could justify the murder as the man was a scumbag.

28. He isn't ticklish, but he would probably try to stop you tickling him anyway.

29. As a mortal, he had pretty low pain tolerance, but as a Nosferatu and after Leslie's death he realized that any amount of physical pain was nothing compared to the crippling pain and guilt that he feels inside everytime his mind slips and he thinks about what happened.

30. He wishes he had the courage to walk up to Kyle (Leslie's then husband) and tell him that he was sorry, that he was weak, selfish and negligent and that it was his fault that Kyle lost his wife and his unborn child. But of course, he never did it, and now Kyle is an old man.

31. Messy: feeding is a very stressful ordeal for him, he only feeds on the homeless men from his herd and he gives them money for it. It's always a terrible time for him, it takes him a while to actually bite down and then he wants to be done with it as soon as possible.

32. When 14 yo Kayley made him bite her after she found out the truth about what he was and she wanted a proof that it didn’t hurt when he fed on people, despite him reassuring her it didn’t. He was deeply hurt by this request, but he forgave her, he realized she was just a curious child, she didn't know how much pain this was causing him.

33. When Leslie found him and despite seeing how he changed, she still told him she loved him and was willing to stay with him. And maybe even more when they had met a few years later and despite the time, he could still see love for him in her eyes like nothing had changed…

34. Hard choice between vision & touch. Both would hinder his ability to write and that is that is the only thing that keeps him somehow sane. Well, together with caring for Kayley, but as she is growing older it is better she sees less of him and has a normal life.

35. He can hold on small talks pretty well,it's actually the only kind of talk he is willing to have with other Kindred after Leslie's death. Mirabelle especially noticed the change in his behavior, but she understands that they weren't really friends and she has no right to pry.

36. He would ask Leslie if she can forgive him for what happened to her and her unborn child. But the truth also is that he is absolutely terrified at the idea as he fears that the truth is that wherever she is, she hates him.

37. The past-so he would have never traveled to San Francisco, or at least he would have traveled to the night when Leslie came to him and this time he would be stronger and pushed her away, not letting her touch him... The future is pointless, there is nothing left there for him.

38. Positive - Leslie made him feel understood, Kayley - gave him some will to live back, Jane - made him feel like he made a difference in her life by persuading her to own her mistakes.

Negative - His Sire who made him question why he deserved this fate for his kindness.

39. He was used to live alone, then he met Leslie and then he was alone again. He was always a solitary person, so the solitude and isolation actually didn't even bother him after the Embrace.

40. The worst had already happened to him, so for a time there wasn't really anything that would make him terrified. But then he met Kayley and of course he fears for her safety as he feels responsible for her. He's afraid that her compassion will one day cost her her life.

#OC Werner #clan nosferatu #vampire the requiem #vampire the masquerade #World Of Darkness #my art #doloresdrawsocs #digital painting #vtr #VTM #nossies #vamily #nWod #chronicles of darkness #ocs #digital portrait #clip paint studio #digital paintings

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