#this isn’t talking about the way romance is used in fiction or the way relationship arcs work or anything

[daisyachain]

This is generalization but it does make me feel like I’m losing my mind. Anglo-American romance novels aimed at women—‘what if you, a normal person, were forced into proximity with the smuggest most self-satisfied person who physically invades your space, insults you, acts like an attention whore at best, borderline sexually assaults you, isn’t that great’ and then you go to romance manga aimed at young women—‘what if you, a normal person, we’re forced into proximity with a two faced bitch who tries to control your every move and also refuses to speak or engage with you unless it’s to isolate you from your peers or get mad at you for talking to another living person’

#obviously there are variants but it drives me insane how even stuff aimed at women is like. isn’t it nice when men treat women horribly. #wouldn’t you love to be treated horribly except the horrible guy in question is hot #literally the extent of straight women’s fantasies is that they get some enjoyment out of looking at men who hate them #aim higher! aim anywhere other than the floor! read yuri for crying out loud #can we not get women to fantasize about getting along with someone and having a good time with them. #save me LoveCom you’re my only hope #kelsey rambles #romcom discourse was dead five years ago but the point remains that if the male lead of your average love interest existed in real life #he should not be allowed within 10 ft of any woman but his grandmother #this isn’t talking about the way romance is used in fiction or the way relationship arcs work or anything #this post is strictly limited to romance as a projection of women’s fantasies out into the world to be consumed for pure self-indulgence #if you’re having a cheat day you shouldn’t be eating stale chips ahoy. #if you’re indulging why not have a crème brûlée! have the world’s densest chocolate cake! #have an almond slice with cream and strawberries. self-indulgence ought to feel good. #I have a sister who likes men so I am assured that the despicable shoujo love interests of the world are attractive in some arcane way #I just can’t fathom it. if a man even half hinted at me that treatment like that was on the table I’d move cities.

[tragedybunny]

Hey there, saw you were so short requests for Astarion. I'll make it short and simple for ideas. How about either; autistic-coded, plus size or shorter! Tav relationship with Astarion headcanon ideas?

Thanks for the ask. I decided to go with autistic Tav since I actually have an idea for a plus size Tav rolling around my idea doc.

Astarion x Autistic GN!Reader Headcanons

Astarion is so pretty, he intimidates you. You’ve always been an outsider, and the people that put you down the most are always the pretty, perfect, definitely not weird people. 

Despite this, you start to find him nice enough, even letting him feed on you. 

When Astarion starts flirting with you, you absolutely do not notice, much to his frustration.

When he eventually bluntly asks you for sex, it makes you so sad. Being the town oddball, you’re used to being propositioned as a joke. You quietly turn him down and decide Astarion isn’t your friend after all. 

You keep feeding him though when he needs it. Mostly because you’re not sure how to tell him about how it made you feel.

Astarion is stunned you turned him down, sure you haven’t been responsive to his flirting, but you get along well enough. And he’s afraid, you need to be on his side since everyone looks up to you. 

He tries to flirt a few more times, but he finds it hurts a little more each time you don’t reciprocate. Even worse, he starts thinking about how nice it would be if you did, even if it was just a smile thrown his way. 

It’s so confusing, he stops even feeding from you, worried one night he’ll ask to just stay, to be allowed to even be in your presence for a few hours. 

You’re always so quiet and reserved around him, but he starts to notice how there’s certain people you just bloom around. Karlach for example, you seem to have no problem chatting the large Tiefling’s ear off. 

It would seem you just don’t like him. 

One day the two of you are rummaging through a ruined house and end up in an old library. A shout from you makes him turn and ask if you’re alright. 

You explain you’re excited because you found a book from this series you love. It’s these biographies of old nobles, heroes, etc., fictionalized but really fun. 

You’re smiling and your eyes are so bright. Astarion’s never seen anything so beautiful. 

Then it all dies in an instant. “I’m sorry, this is silly. I’m probably bothering you.” 

Astarion wants to gut every person who ever made you feel that way. And he can tell there were many. 

He hurries to assure you that you are not boring him, and this is not silly. 

With a little prodding, you continue until the sound of Gnolls in the distance makes you both realize it’s time to go. 

At the last second, he recalls he saw the author’s name in another pile that had fallen from the shelf. He plucks it out and hands it to you. “Now you have two.”

That night, you shyly turn up at his tent, asking if he’d like to borrow one. 

At this point, he’d read a book Gale wrote on Tressyms just to talk with you about it. 

“If you’ll stay and read with me.” He’s shocked you agree.

It’s becomes a ritual, you read together at night, and talk about it on the road during the day. 

You’re finally all bright and cheerful with him, and it takes his breath away. 

One night, he can’t resist and leans in to steal a kiss while you’re chatting. 

You’re stunned. Normally you’d think he was making fun of you again, but now that you’ve gotten closer, it’s just confusing.

You finally have the courage to ask, and Astarion confesses how long he’s liked you. 

You’re overwhelmed and take a while to speak, making Astarion afraid he’s just ruined everything.

When you do, everything spills out, as you hurriedly explain why you kept your distance. 

Astarion really can’t believe that a kind, gorgeous person like yourself was some sort of strange outcast. But he is a Vampire so maybe he’s skewed. 

The two of you take things slow, you don’t exactly have much experience in romance. 

Which is nice, it let’s Astarion figure himself out a bit more. 

He realizes that sometimes you get in over your head in social situations, and he’s always there to back you up or take over.

The first time you had a meltdown, you were both scared, Astarion that he'd caused it somehow and you that he'd see how abnormal you were.

Afterwards, he starts to open up more about disassociating and his nightmares.

You learn how to take care of each other when these things happen. 

Astarion will admit he doesn't always follow the thought process that's going on in that lovely head of yours, but it makes you even more fascinating, not frustrating like you worry. 

You call yourself strange and again he reminds you he's a literal blood sucking, undead, creature of the night. Who's the strange one? 

When you talk about something you're passionate about, you're amazing to watch. 

Astarion doesn't come with ingrained expectations you can never meet. He just wants you to be you. 

You've never felt more comfortable and safe around anyone. 

Astarion often threatens to head back to your hometown to teach a few people a lesson. You tell him it doesn't matter anymore, you're so happy right now, today 

The two of you argue constantly about who's luckier to have ended up in this relationship. But it feels like you were made to be together. 

Tag list, to be added comment or dm me

@micropoe10 @spacebarbarianweird @writingmysanity @mxxny-lupin @azu21

@tallymonster @dependsonthedream

@sunfire-ancunin @bambamwolf87 @fayeriess

@lumienyx @elora-the-slutty-songstress

@astariongf @satanicspinosaurus @lisrelly

#Astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x gn reader #x reader #astarion x tav #astarion x gn!tav #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #my writing #my fanfic #astarion headcanons

[messiahzzz]

thank you sm for the ask!! 💕 i’m glad you enjoy my posts and it is not a strange request by any means!

note: this is merely my read on gale’s sexual preferences/kinks. i don’t want to police anyone on their headcanons or claim they are “incorrect”. since the game doesn’t provide too much detail, many things remain up to interpretation. (and lest we forget fanfiction has always encouraged the exploration of dynamics that may not be present in canon.)

gale is a character who isn’t interested in walking the straight and narrow route. he is all about new experiences, favoring non-traditional means, putting his own spin on things, and the thrill of seeking the forbidden. the sheer romance of the uncharted and the unknown. he is enthusiastic in almost every aspect and possesses an infectious zest for life. in regards to his sexual preferences, this translates into an eagerness to explore, witness new sensations, and reach new heights together. while approaching the topic of sexuality with a generally playful, adventurous attitude.

if you’re looking for harder kinks, however — i don’t believe gale is the character for you. and in case it needs to be said again: there is nothing wrong with being vanilla.

initially, i see gale as a switch, who gravitates more towards assuming a dominant role, due to his ever-present desire to give and to impress. i do think he enjoys giving up control, yet you still have to actively convince him to let himself go and be spoiled for once. his first focus will always be to fulfill his partner's needs and drown them in his all-encompassing love and adoration. i also believe that gale will grow more comfortable with being the center of attention, once their relationship has reached a point of total security (and he had ample opportunities to show in just how many ways he can wow them). gale is not a strict dom, nor a sub. in his ideal relationship roles would be discarded entirely, deeming them too restrictive in his expression of intimacy with a trusted partner. it’s all about variety and ridding oneself of the shackles of the worldly, after all. melting into one perfect whole, not knowing where he ends and his partner begins.

gale: we are all sensual vessels. illusory magic lets us sail farther, and feel more deeply.

gale: [..] i could use the weave to make us feel sensations beyond reckoning.

based on what we know about gale, these could be some of his kinks:

lots of praise (this is non-negotiable), sensation/temperature play (waxplay, electrostimulation/all the many perks magic has to offer), sensory deprivation, light restrictions and bondage, the occasional roleplay, katoptronophilia (self-explanatory), altered mental-states (hypnosis, psychedelics), orgasm control & denial, body worship, olfactophilia and given his propensity towards verbosity: narratophilia and some very inventive dirty talk. as for my own self-indulgent take: due to the recurring emphasis on hands during his romance, as well as his being the main tool in how he shapes and navigates the world: quirofilia.

nodecontext: flustered, standing in front of his romance partner in bondage gear. not necessarily uncomfortable with the bondage aspect, just trying to stay focused.

now, what are gale’s hard-limits?

gale, after the player received loviatar's blessing: your hide, your choice. not quite my cup of tea though.

while projecting your own kinks and fantasies onto fictional characters is fine and well, disregarding and ignoring the source material (and the character's stated boundaries) is another matter entirely. fanon!gale is rather ooc and very different from his canon portrayal, which is something that tends to irk me. although this remains a common fandom phenomenon.

personally, i don’t see gale as someone who enjoys pain of any kind, be it giving or receiving (with the exception of spanking and light choking, if a certain mood strikes. although it is kept mostly playful). contrary to what fandom may claim, having self-worth issues, being loquacious, emotionally expressive, and vulnerability-seeking (as well as being commonly perceived as arrogant and insufferable) doesn't automatically equal having repressed masochistic tendencies. he could be convinced to dip a toe into sadism, but only upon his partner’s insistence. although i doubt he himself would find enjoyment in that.

the same applies to degradation/humiliation. i doubt that a character who is still very much struggling with inherent self-worth issues and a general feeling of being defective/not worthy would derive sexual gratification from being degraded. yes, it can certainly be healing for some, but gale doesn’t strike me as someone who would find particular enjoyment in that. quite the contrary, actually. nor would he like to do the degrading for that matter (he would vehemently refuse. all he wants to do is sing your praises.) gale wouldn’t enjoy being leashed and/or collared in any way either. the prospect of being tied up or restricted is rather intriguing, cause it serves to center one’s vulnerability while also allowing for more intense sensations. anything that taps into the puppy play/slave territory tho? he would find it demeaning… and, quite frankly, silly.

gale is also not a voyeur, nor a cuck. the entire scene with the drow twins leans way too much into dub-con territory for my tastes. the only way you can get him to participate at all is by rolling a persuasion check with DC 25. in every other dialogue option, he immediately (and explicitly) declines. even if you do manage to pass the persuasion check, he is still very hesitant about participating.

gale: i might enjoy watching you tangled up with the drow, as long as i was five paces back.

he then immediately runs from the room, because sending a simulacrum in his place was the only way to somewhat remove himself from the situation while still being able to please tav. because of course he wants to please and clearly this is important to tav so he might just… have to discard his reservations and... just go through with it?!

gale: well i suppose it would do no good to back out now. let us begin this little anthropological study, if we must.

i am aware that fandom uses the fact that his “orb lit up in telltale excitement” as a justification that persuading him was the right choice, as well as confirmation that he was secretly into it and “just needed a little push" to explore his desires/get out of his comfort zone. that implication alone is very suspect and goes straight into the sort of logic abusers often use. you can be physically aroused by certain scenes, images, or sounds, even while being visibly uncomfortable with the presented scenario. it is a natural response that you can’t often control. which is what he is showing throughout the entire scene: discomfort. he was coerced into this situation, without any prior discussion or an opportunity to talk about his boundaries. furthermore, this is what he has to say if you approach him after the threesome:

gale: ahem. i hope you're not here to ask about our recent, erm, activities. i'd rather those were consigned to the footnotes of our romance, if it's all the same with you.

since he is strictly monogamous, any arrangement involving another person is also a no. he made this rather clear when tav sought him out after receiving halsin's proposal. him being monogamous isn't solely rooted in his trauma, it isn't something he has to “overcome” in order to heal, nor does it mean that their relationship is any less fulfilling. call him greedy, stubborn, or old-fashioned, but he cannot comfortably agree to that.

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #bg3 meta #now what do i even tag this as? #coercion cw #degradation tw #humiliation tw #will have to do some more thinking about the whole “gale has a breeding kink” take #as of now i don't believe that it is a kink nor a squick of his #as long as there's no actual risk of pregnancy involved that is #btw guys i love answering these #if you enjoy reading my long ass posts feel free to clutter my inbox #it speaks

[eyeofhurakana]

Title: “Unlike Fiction” Chapter: 1/1? Pairing: Sampo x Reader, Gepard x Reader Reader: Gender Neutral / Illegal Underworlder living in Overworld Relationship Level: Sampo - Ex-Beau / Gepard - Current Beau   Trust: Sampo - Low / Gepard - Moderate Summary: You decide to show up for Gepard’s celebration for becoming Captain of the Silvermane guard at Serval’s request. However, things don’t go as expected… Warning!: Cursing, Thoughts of Self-Harm (No harm though!)

Glimmering glass chandeliers, bubbling champagne, and a cast of incredibly wealthy persons that all seem to know one another only skin deep… 

This scenery is straight out of any romance novel conveying star-crossed lovers of opposing social classes. Though you had to admit, the authors really nailed it. You always thought that at least some of it had to be a little embellished. Yet just as they say, even the ceiling of this immense manor is painted with glorious recounts of Belobog’s long history with awe-inspiring detail. 

Your fingers squeeze around the stem of your champagne glass.  

The nobles that have gathered are all dressed to the nines. Some even go so far as to wear flowers that are worth at least six years of your own pay. You gulp when you catch sight of a few of the noble ladies standing off to the side in a huddled corner with handheld fans up, covering the lower part of their faces. Quickly, you avert your gaze.  

You already know they’re talking about you. Not that it matters. Gossip is a game for the small-minded and weak-willed. 

Though you can’t help a certain thought that keeps besieging your mind. 

Should you really be here?

“There you are!” Serval calls excitedly with no bother to maintain the rules of decorum as she hurries over to you.

Thank Qlipoth… 

Her outfit fits the atmosphere but you feel a sense of pride to see that she never took out her punk rock highlights. It gives you a sense of solidarity as there were a few things in your own look that you refused to change just for a single event. 

She definitely gets a few irksome looks, for the mere sin of existing. But like the magnificent storm queen that she is, she doesn’t even care. Immediately, you feel like you’ve found refuge the second she hooks her arm around yours. 

“Ugh, thank goodness that you’re here. I was about to lose my head just a moment ago,” she huffs lightly before leaning into you with a relieved smile, “Seriously. I’m really glad you came. I know this isn’t what you’re used to… but if I know Geppie, he’s going to love it that you're here.”

“You really think so?” you ask, still feeling a bit apprehensive. 

“Of course! Oh god. You should see how he lights up whenever he mentions you. I swear, you’re like his favorite subject to talk about these days. He barely mentions work anymore. Thank you, by the way. That subject was getting a bit tiresome, but I never really knew how to break it to him, you know? I’m just still sore after the whole… Well… You know.” 

Her cerulean eyes drift downwards. 

Serval’s sudden termination from the Architects was definitely a huge blow. It was still fresh in her mind despite it happening over a few months ago. Even so, you could still see the cracks it left in her. 

It was a miracle that she didn’t give up hope on everything entirely… 

You squeeze her arm a little to bring her back to the present before she can drown herself in the past. 

“Hey, let’s just enjoy ourselves then. We’ve been through hell. It’s the least we can do, right? We can even see this as, I dunno, reparations for stupid bullshit?” 

“Reparations for Stupid Bullshit. RSB. I like it,” Serval laughs with a delighted nod, gladly going with the flow, “Yeah. Let’s do that.” 

She squeezes you back. An appreciative thank you. 

The two of you end up tearing up the tables filled with fancy cocktails and hors d'oeuvres while chatting about everything and nothing. By the time the great big announcement comes around, both you and Serval are incredibly - and happily - drunk. Restraint isn’t exactly a strong suit for either of you. It’s probably why you get along so well.

When Gepard is announced as the next Captain of the Guard, you both end up hooting and hollering like fools. You get a few glances from those surrounding you and even Gepard breaches the usual protocol to peek. 

But he doesn’t smile when he sees you. 

Instead, his eyes widen, brows flying up. Then he turns to face front and center like the soldier he’s trained to be. 

“...” 

A sudden sick, sinking feel forms in your chest. 

What was that? 

It doesn’t help that you’re intoxicated. The wall that usually keeps the worst thoughts out suddenly isn’t there anymore. Worries flood you without hindrance. 

The dam of reason isn’t there to protect you. 

“The hell was that?” Serval says, only escalating your worries, “He saw us, right?” 

You purse your lips tightly, unable to reply. 

Gepard receives praise from both of his parents as well as a few renowned dignitaries. It takes everything you have to keep Serval from breaking into tears at the sight of Cocolia. Serval ends up holding your hand with such a tight grip that her fingernails dig into your skin. But you let it happen. You know how deep those emotional wounds have cut… 

She’s barely holding herself together. 

“Serval…” 

“Don’t tell me we should go. I-I deserve to be here too,” she insists shakily which is remarkably perceptive for own so heavily inebriated, “If anything… she’s the one that doesn’t belong here… This is my home. My home.”  

The pain in her voice pulls at every heartstring inside of you. But you have to be the least drunk between you. …Since sobriety is long, long gone. 

“I… need to use the bathroom,” you say. 

It’s not a lie entirely. Besides, she won’t question it. You don’t know your way around this place like she does. 

“Oh shit. Sorry. Yeah, of course. Come on. I’ll take you… woah. Um… Let me hang onto you.” 

It takes a little while to find a washroom. It seems Serval’s mind keeps getting muddled from having seen Cocolia. But you keep your patience. It’s what you’d want from your friend if this ever happened to you… 

By the time you get to a nearby empty washroom, you barely shut the door when you hear Serval breaking into tears. Your heart becomes heavier than you’re used to. Maybe because you’re pretty sure that you’re bound for one more heartbreak today. 

Gepard’s face the moment he saw you in the crowd has yet to leave your mind. 

As much as you’d like to hope… you feel that you already know.

He didn’t tell them… 

You sit there on the closed toilet for barely a moment before breaking out into silent tears. 

This… always… happens. 

You try to keep quiet as best you can. You don’t like expressing your pain to others. Your upbringing discouraged showing weakness of any kind. To those around you at that time… you were an incessant inconvenience. 

Even still, you hear a soft knock on the door. 

Serval sniffles just behind it. 

“Are you crying?” she asks with a genuine sweetness behind it, despite her own anguish, that just makes something inside of you crumble to dust.

A sob escapes despite your damnedest attempts to keep it in. 

You don’t want to be a burden. 

Yet before you know it, she’s already come in and hugs you tightly without reservation. You don’t remember how long the two of you bawl your eyes out, but it’s enough that Serval has to reapply both her and your makeup. 

 Every noble wears makeup and she’ll be damned if she lets one of her few closest friends walk around shabby.  

“Hey, hey. I know you’re worried…” she says while gently applying another coat of foundation on your cheeks, “But I’m telling you, my brother would never ever do that to you. Ugh… He’s nothing like that con man. Ugh… I’m so sorry that I even introduced you to that jerk. He just… He didn’t seem like that, you know?” 

She popped her foundation away back into her hidden dress pocket before pulling out some eyeliner to fix the mess under your eyes. 

“Geppie is different. I swear. I’ve never heard him tell a lie in his whole life.” Her motions slow as she remembers the look he gave both of you during the celebration of his promotion. “I… I’m sure he had his reasons for reacting so weird. Maybe he was just really surprised?” 

You smile weakly despite not believing that. 

“You’re probably right,” you fib. 

Damn. You were already exhibiting bad habits from said someone… 

“Don’t worry. We’ll talk to him soon.” 

And just like that, the two of you return to the party though it’s mostly over and done with. Only a few of the major boozehounds stay for the free alcohol while others try some last minute attempts to schmooze with those of higher standing. 

Eventually, Serval learns where Gepard retreated off to in search of some solace. 

“This’ll be great. I’m sure of it,” she says as she pulls you along. 

But with every step, you feel like you’re nearing an execution. The type that can tear the very soul in half while keeping the physical body intact. 

“Stay here,” she whispers to you, leaving you just outside the doors before dramatically shoving them open, “Little bro!” 

You can hear the shifting of his armor along with his footsteps as he turns to face his older sister. 

“Serval…” 

Gepard's voice sounds heavy. No matter how much you rewind it in your head, there’s no mirth in it. 

“Surprised?” she asks as she hugs him suddenly, “Didn’t think I’d miss your big day, did you?”

“...” 

“Gepard?” she asks before leaning back to eye him better.

“You shouldn’t have brought them…” he murmurs but it’s not low enough that you can’t catch it. 

The ground beneath you becomes like thin ice over a frigid lake. Each word he says produces a fresh crack, branching out to assure your inevitable destruction. 

“What? What do you mean? Aren’t you glad to see them? Gepard, you two are dating. Of course, I’d-” Serval then suddenly stops.

You drop your head as you feel an uncomfortable heat rising along your neck and ears. 

Mortification. 

She takes a step back. 

“You didn’t tell them?” she asks but she’s not really asking.

Her tone sounds utterly appalled.  

“I-I was working on it!” 

“Gepard! You said-!”

“I know what I said!” 

You can’t take anymore. 

Removing your shoes, your footfalls become nearly silent as you make a desperate retreat for the nearest open balcony. The freezing air greets you the moment you step out. With a shudder, you make it to the nearest portable heater, switching it on. With time, it glows a gentle orange that reminds you of the Geomarrow where you’re really from… 

The place that you should feel ashamed of… 

A tear escapes you but you quickly wipe it away, refusing to cry any longer. 

Then… in just that moment…

A crazy thought invades your mind.

This is very high up. 

…Anything could happen.

A despairing croak escapes you as you grip onto yourself tightly. 

No, no, no. Not these thoughts. 

Anything but these thoughts!!

It’s like fighting against the blinding cold winds of the Great Freeze. There’s no escape and before you know it, you’re completely lost within its windchill. 

If only you hadn’t left… Being alone and disturbed with far too much alcohol always makes for a tragedy waiting to happen… 

Please… Someone…  I don’t… I don’t want…

And then the improbable happens.

A light flickering in the distance. 

At first, it seems random until you realize it remarkably seems like the code that-

No bloody way. 

‘Hey there, friend.’ 

That’s what it says. 

Your eyes widen. 

No way, no way, no way. 

Quickly, you pull out the pocket mirror Serval had lent you. Well, given you, but it was way too expensive to keep on your person. You would sneak it back into the untouched mounds within her workshop later. 

For now, you pop it open and use the mirror to reflect the light to message back. 

‘Friend or foe?’

You wait with great anticipation for the next reply. At first, you think it might not come, but it does.

‘Friend?’

A desperate laugh escapes you as you can tell right away who this is. 

‘Idiot.’

He doesn’t miss a beat. 

‘Your idiot.’ 

You frown. 

‘Not mine.’ You correct firmly. 

Then nothing. A part of you gets tense. 

Did you ruin it? If so, then was it for the best? 

But those thoughts vanish when you finally see the light flash again. 

‘Are you okay?’  

Now it was your turn to give pause. Were you okay? 

Your hands trembled around the mirrors as fresh tears fell. This was a pivotal moment. You could feel it. 

The air felt like it had been sealed in an invisible vacuum. Static silently building within…  

You look toward where you came from.

Neither Landau has come for you… 

Too busy bickering, no doubt. 

You lightly bite down on your tongue to try and stop the tears but it’s futile. 

‘Not okay.’

The next response is so quick that you nearly miss it.

‘SOS?’

You tense. 

Your next response will be huge for what happens next… 

‘SOS?’ He asks again. “...” 

No. The pain is too much. You want out. 

‘SOS.’ 

You wait a few minutes there for a response or anything… but there’s nothing. Your shoulders drop with regret at showing even a hint of your vulnerability to an ex of all people. He probably just found your pain entertaining. Maybe he was taking pictures on his phone right now.

Well, might as well give him the best shot. 

You weep quietly from where you lean against the railing… only to feel a sudden rumble from the west side of the manor. It… felt like the kind of shockwaves a bomb gives. 

Did he just-?! 

The clanking of metallic armor stomping down the halls fills your ears as commands are shouted at length. You debate leaving the balcony but now you’re scared. What if you’ve been lured into a trap? What if you’ll be made the scapegoat? What if-

“Hey there.” 

You turn to see the dual dagger-wielding rogue lifting himself with ease over the railing. You were at least three stories high… Had he really just scaled all of that on his own? 

Those enchanting green eyes capture you in an instant as they seem equally mesmerized to see you again. A relieved smile spreads across his face as he tilts his head. 

“Heard you wanted a swift exit?” 

AN: *sipping on Bicardi* Wow. I did not expect to write this… Thank you magic bat. 

For those of you that made it this far, thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it! 

This could continue but we'll see. Love Triangles are pretty fun though, eh?

#sampo #sampo koski #hsr #honkai star rail #hsr x reader #sampo koski x reader #sampo x reader #hurakana fic #star rail #sampo simping #gepard landau #gepard #serval landau #gepard x reader

[valyrfia]

RE: this ask

Sorry about to go off on one, gender studies and online fan culture from an academic standpoint is a special interest of mine because being film and literature student wasn't annoying enough (participatory culture studies my beloved) 

From a general standpoint, I think the reason M/M ships in fiction have always been more popular is because male characters are historically more developed and complex. I think it’s only in recent years have their been an influx of popular F/F ships, with the added development of women on screen (e.g Clarke and Lexa, Kara and Lena, Regina and Emma, Nancy and Robin) - I think there is also a point to be made this has coincided with gender expression, genderqueerness and more general knowledge of being outside the typical gender spectrum. 

I can’t explicitly say that being in M/M fandom spaces encouraged my personal discovery of being transmasc but it certainly helped to have an avenue where I could project onto these “male” characters and see myself in them. I was so uncomfortable in my own body and what I didn’t know at the time as dysphoria, I can see why I didn’t go for F/F ships. 

There are of course a lot of “fandom elders” but young (early to late teens) afab people do make up a large bulk of it and I get why  it may be easier for them to fixate on M/M ships as a, sort of method of exploring their own sexuality and gender expression. F/F ships may hit too close to home and F/M ships are what they are trying to escape from so it leaves M/M ships to project onto. Which, unfortunately then can become warped by the persons own comphet and/or binary ideas about gender. 

A male character may have more stereotypically “feminine” traits (in terms of interests or emotional reactions) and I can see why people who also have those traits would project there own insecurities onto them, reinforcing the feminisation of the male character but not being comfortable enough in your own gender expression to genderbend the character or write them as trans. 

It’s the same reason I think mafia romance, dark romance etc etc is so popular with cishet women because they can read about a fantasy where instead of the very real every day misogyny and violence they face leading to abuse, assault and death, it brings “positives” ; protected, loved, a happy relationship. 

Which, side note. I think this has A Lot to do with y/n, self insert fics becoming “cringe”. Because, I think a lot of people just want to fuck/date a character and feel like they can’t write a self insert anymore, so just project massively onto one character, leading to a lot of these issues. I don’t think Tony Stark/Peter Parker would be as popular as it is if people just let young women write their self insert fic about being Tony Stark’s sugar baby and then we wouldn’t have the wildly mischaracterised version of Peter Parker that we do! 

But, all this being said. I’m talking about fiction. Dean Winchester isn’t actually affected if people online only talk about him in a stereotypically “female” way. 

RPF is a different kettle of fish (and I’m not going in RPF ethics that’s different - I have no issues with rpf creators/consumers to be clear, I am one) because a real person does become affected. Even if you are keeping your fan works and discussions to private spaces, it can leach over into how you speak about the actual person. That’s where it becomes so incredibly important to remember that your RPF version of celebrities are just as fictional as Dean Winchester is. 

sorry I used mr. supernatural as an example, 13 year old me is still alive and kicking in my head somewhere. 

I love to hear your perspective on it with a trans worldview (and academic credentials), and I do agree that that might be a big driver of some young people only wanting to engage with MLM fic and feeling uncomfortable with WLW fic. You've brought up so many great points so I'll try and address them all.

I can add the perspective of a lesbian who was closeted for the first two decades of my life, came out less than five years ago, and still struggles on and off with comphet now. MLM fics in my teens were a way to consume queer content and relationships without having to think about the implications of enjoying consuming WLW content, and I think that's true for a lot of young closeted teens so it's no surprise that some comphet/hetnorm/cisnorm stuff bleeds through there because it's a framework the authors haven't managed to detach themselves from yet.

But yeah, I agree the issue lies with people wanting characters to be self-inserts partially so that they can experience sex, sexuality, and romance without any of the hang ups of thinking about patriarchy. And I agree with your solution: make y/n fics cool again! The ability we have to hallucinate while we read is magic! You can put YOURSELF in as a character's love interest, how cool is that?

Ultimately, yeah. There's nothing wrong with RPF as long as it isn't actually affecting the person that the RPF is based off, but I've seen a lot of takes escaping containment so to say (ie. leaving this website) with takes about the actual racers so obviously picked up through RPF. The main culprits are Charles, Lando, Max in my experience.

#You always send the longest and most thought out asks and I really don't know how to answer them because you're so eloquent #thank you for your POV! #enigmabird #asks #charles in makeup and lace discourse #hate it slightly too late to change it now

[thranduel]

if mike and el stay together and byler isn’t endgame, the writers would be sending the most awful message.

firstly, a little girl escapes a lab she grew up in after being abused and traumatised, and starts dating the first person that shows her kindness after spending less than a week with him?? really? she gets kissed when she's 12 years old after a few days of knowing him when she can’t communicate at the same level as the other characters (there’s a line where lucas says mike’s 3 year old sister talks more and this was included to prove that el was definitely NOT ready to be shoved into a relationship) and she doesn’t even understand the concept of romance at all. she doesn’t even know who she is as an individual person (her likes, her dislikes, her fashion sense, her type when it comes to crushes, her favourite foods, how the world outside the lab works, literally nothing about herself at all) and she doesn't even know the meaning of the word "friend" and has to be taught what it means. yet she still gets forced into a romantic relationship with someone she didn’t even have time to develop a friendship with first while still basically being strangers? HOW is that healthy? how are people seriously okay with that?! (and before anyone starts, i’m NOT saying that she couldn’t eventually get into a relationship. of course she could. but it happened WAY too quickly when she wasn’t ready at all and people need to acknowledge this).

secondly, another abused and traumatised child is gay and in love with his best friend, and they’ve made him suffer the entire show while thinking he’ll never be loved back?? even when all the other kids were happy in season 3 and getting into romantic relationships, will didn’t have that. he got absolutely nothing, except being excluded and shoved to the side. what kind of message are they sending to only do this to the main gay character? why do all the other kids get to be happy and experience love? especially after how they included homophobic slurs in season 1 about will, it would be absolutely disgusting to leave him with unrequited love. gay people go through enough pain and suffering in real life, so why would anyone want to be reminded of that while watching a fictional show with a character that they relate to and find comfort in? shawn levy said their show is an anthem for the marginalised. how is making the gay kid suffer sending a good message for those who are outcasted and oppressed in society? it’s just hurting people. it’s making them think they’ll never find happiness and it’s also allowing the homophobes to win. it goes against everything this show has fought for and why it was created in the first place.

another thing that’s absolutely ridiculous is the massive difference between mike’s relationship with el vs his relationship with will. mike and el’s relationship lacks trust, honesty, communication and understanding, while mike and will’s relationship has all of those things and more. what kind of message are they sending if they keep mike and el together but keep mike and will apart? why are they telling people that it’s okay to stay in a relationship with extreme emotional attachment and codependency due to shared trauma when you don’t even feel like an equal to your partner? mike and el literally admitted they don’t feel like equals. they’re both insecure in this relationship and they feel inferior to each other. they’ve made each other feel like shit in every season (except s2 since they didn’t even see each other until the end). how is it okay to tell people to stay in a relationship like this?

and finally, why would the writers think it’s okay to use will as a plot device to force mike and el back together while he continues to suffer? mike is will’s best friend. he’s his safe place and the boy he loves most. and yet the writers have made will sit back and watch him with someone else while he suffers alone. they literally put him in almost every mike and el scene in season 4 just to rub it in even more. then they had the audacity to turn a very personal and meaningful scene that was supposed to be about mike and will ONLY and made it about el, because of course they did. it’s like mike and will can’t have anything for themselves anymore. will’s painting and his feelings for mike were something extremely personal and they made it about el in order to mislead mike and push him into telling her he loves her. it’s messed up on so many levels and i don’t understand how anyone thinks it’s okay.

#byler

[cto10121]

How Romance in Fiction Works

For this Valentine’s Day I dedicate this to all the “Romeo and Juliet/Twilight/[insert X] isn’t a romance!!1!1” clownery out there, because now I have to contend with the depressing fact that people—and not just illiterate randos, actual bookish people perhaps too used to the Hero’s Journey template—have no clue what romance in fiction (as the main plot) works. And no, it has nothing to do with ~fantasy or ~wish fulfillment or ~everyone is nice and in love and nobody’s mean or cheats ever!!!1!1 It has to do with the goals of a romance. I’ll be focusing largely on literature, but technically this can also apply to TV, movies, and other dramatic mediums.

(Disclaimer: I will not be talking about romance as a genre, either the knight/damsel tradition or the HEA conventions of modern American romance fiction. The former has nothing to do with romantic love and the latter has nothing to do with the art of fiction but what sells, so don’t @me. It should also go without saying that I won’t be talking about romance as a subplot to the main plot. You lot already know too much about that already.)

Romance IRL vs. Fiction

So romance in real life can be literally anything and occur anywhere and at any time. No duh. That is true for *waves hand vaguely* everything in reality. Fiction, however, is a different story. It must, in short, make sense. There is plot, character, tone, as well as your literary techniques and devices. Otherwise the romance will not work or be implausible. So far, the same as most any other fiction.

Where romance differs from most fiction, however, lies in its purpose. I like it to call it The Romance Novel Paradox. To whit: Romance in fiction functions on the premise that the couple cannot be together because of X reasons. As soon as the couple resolve all of their issues and be together fully, that’s when the romantic story is over.

Thus, the task of the romance writer is to prevent the couple from getting together before the point where they absolutely need to be. So in a way, writing a romance…is fundamentally writing an anti-romance.

Sounds crazy and weird and hard? It is. That’s exactly why writing romance is so hard in the first place. You have to juggle these two separate and opposite tensions tugging and tearing at the work. You literally have to do two things at the same time along with all the other things required of writing a romance.

The Goals

So with all this in mind, the goals of the romance is as follows:

That the couple meet and fall in love

That the couple enjoy and even consummate their love

That the couple overcome any obstacles that threaten their relationship

That the couple be successful in being true to their love and the first 3 goals.

The Plot(s)

Romances actually have two kinds of plot. I’ll just call them the Courtship Plot and the Love Story Plot respectfully.

The Courtship Plot essentially deals with the inner conflicts/obstacles that prevent the couple from being in love or falling for each other. This could be as short as a scene or two or as long as a whole book/movie/TV show, depending on the medium and intentions.

Beginning/Set Up: Establishes both the world, its stakes, and/or the romantic couple. Oftentimes, though, a romance does start with a different character(s) entirely who talk about the couple before they appear.

Inciting Incident: This is when the couple first meet. This could range anywhere from love at first sight (instalove) to absolute abhorrence (rivals/enemies to lovers).

Courtship/Investigation: Even if the couple does do instalove, they must first get an understanding of each other’s intentions, the depth of love/attraction, personality, etc. This time also includes Proofs of Love, in which the lovers each provide proof of their love for each other through words, acts of service, etc.

Internal Conflicts/Obstacles: These relate to the couple’s inner conflicts/hangups that prevent them from entering a relationship and what they must do to overcome those. In this type of plot they will mostly be internal but there can be some external obstacles as well.

Separation of the Lovers: Most often because of misunderstandings/internal hangups, but it can also be because of actual external shit beyond their control.

Resolution: These inner conflicts are resolved and the couple can get together properly. Traditionally this is shown through marriage (Cheers, bells, and Hymen the God of Marriage arrives to officiate your wedding. Congrats!). Or simply living together/dating.

This is more or less the plot of a romantic comedy, but this can be the plot of romantic drama as well, especially if those internal conflicts are truly heavy. There may also be some external conflict happening, but it’s usually not as significant as the internal ones.

The Love Plot, or Love Story, is concerned with the the love/relationship of a couple as well. However, it is less focused on the courtship side and more on the external conflicts/obstacles that threaten their love. To whit:

Courtship (Abridged): Some Love Plots may include this, but it is not strictly necessary. If they, it’s mostly in abridged form, quick montage, small flashback, or simply just as Proofs of Love.

Couple Is In Love (Status Quo): Most Love Plots begin with the lovers already together and in love.

External Conflicts/Obstacles: These include anything that prevents the lovers from getting together or keeps them apart. Family doesn’t approve, society doesn’t approve, natural events occur, personal enemies, other love interests, etc. Sometimes the couple has an internal conflict going on, but mostly not for this

Separation of the Lovers: Almost always temporarily and literally, due to above External Conflicts and, on occasion, Internal Conflicts. Very rarely metaphorically.

The Lovers Reunite: Almost always, although some media may skip this part.

Couple Triumphs (Or Not): The couple succeeds in vanquishing all obstacles and they come out stronger than ever, yay! Or they don’t and they die and/or their love dies, oh no! Yes, the latter is definitely an option and actually not an uncommon one with these plots.

The Love Story Plot does have its downside in that it can be harder for the audience to care very much for the couple if they haven’t spent at least some time getting to know them and their love. However, it is preferred traditionally if just because of the dramatic and much-clearer stakes involved. The lovers’ characters are also revealed/developed through adversity, which is always a plus.

So all romances are effectively love stories. However, not all romances are love stories. Most romances tend to have both, mostly in one or two books. In Epic Romance this is stretched to three or four at the most. Beyond four the book/TV show/thing turns from a romance into a full-blown soap opera (coughOutlandercough).

So here are a few examples of romances often classified as such and why they count as romances. I’ll start with two works people most insist are not romances: Romeo and Juliet and Twilight.

Example 1: Romeo and Juliet

Though tons of Internet clowns insist to this day that Romeo and Juliet is not a romance and is a comedy/satire/what have you, it skews closely to the Romance plot as outlined.

Romeo and Juliet:

Courtship Plot: Two families in a patriarchal, violent, and conservative society hate each other (Beginning/Set Up). They meet at a ball and fall in love (Inciting Incident). But of course they are heirs of two feuding families (Obstacle 1). However, Juliet is worried that Romeo is just playing with her (Internal Conflict) while Romeo is worried Juliet might choose to refuse him after all (Internal Conflict). As proof Juliet asks Romeo to arrange for their marriage and Romeo agrees right away (Resolution). Romeo pretends he is over Rosaline with Mercutio and Benvolio and meets with the Nurse to arrange the marriage (Proof of Love). They then get married and renew their commitment to each other (Couple Triumphs).

Love Story: This is the latter half of the play. Tybalt kills Mercutio, so Romeo kills Tybalt and gets banished (Obstacle 2), Juliet forgives him (Proof of Love), they make love (Proof of Love), and say goodbye to each other (Separation of the Lovers). Juliet is then forced to marry Paris by her parents (Obstacle 3) and so with the help of the Friar she fakes her death (Resolution). But Romeo doesn’t get the news in time due to plague (Obstacle 4), and so goes to her tomb and kills himself; Juliet wakes up and does the same (Couple Defeated…Triumphs?).

So obviously Romeo and Juliet is a love story in just plot alone. But is it also a romance? As you can see, they end up dead and do not succeed in having a full relationship.

That said. Romeo and Juliet do succeed in keeping their love for each other true and pure. They do not cheat each other, think about cheating on each other, or decide not to pursue their relationship. And that, I feel, is more important than the fact that they could not be together in life. So yes, I do think theirs is a romance too, and why most people consider it to be one.

Example 2: Twilight

Speaking of another work that gets a lot of hate for no good reason, Twilight! And of course you have the antis insist this isn’t a romance either. Unfortunately for them the plot hews even more closer to the romance plot and even has more of a Courtship Arc. To whit:

Twilight:

Courtship Plot: Bella goes to Forks to please her narcissistic mother and worries about fitting in (Beginning/Set Up). She meets Edward on the first day of her new school (Inciting Incident). Unfortunately Edward wants to eat her (Obstacle 1) and leaves for three days later. They meet again and talk about each other (Courtship). Edward then saves Bella from the van the next day (Obstacle 2). This, however, does not bring them together and they don’t speak for one month until Edward gets jealous of Mike Newton (Obstacle 3). Edward and Bella become tentative friends and Edward takes Bella to the nurse’s office when she gets dizzy smelling blood (Obstacle 4). He insists on driving her home and they talk (Courtship). Bella and Edward spend the weekend apart but still thinking about each other; Bella learns what he is (Courtship). Bella then goes to Port Angeles with friends and Edward rescues her from rapists (Obstacle 4). They then talk (Courtship) and Edward admits he is a vampire. The next day Bella and Edward go public about their situation (Courtship) and they talk at lunch, clarifying their feelings for each other; Edward invites Bella to the meadow on the weekend. Billy Black learns of their relationship and tries to warn Bella (Obstacle 5). Edward and Bella meet in the meadow and confess their love for each other (Courtship). Edward successfully resists his bloodlust all for his love for Bella (Resolution of Obstacle 1).

Love Story: This is basically the latter half of Twilight and the rest of the series. Edward saves Bella from James (Obstacle 1) and the lovers are together again (Lovers Triumph).

New Moon:

Love Story: Bella and Edward are in love (Status Quo), but then Jasper tries to eat her and Edward’s self-loathing and desire for Bella to have a regular human life kicks in (Obstacle 2). Edward lies to Bella and tells her he doesn’t want to be with her and she accepts it (Separation of the Couple). For six months the two are barely functional. Eventually Bella’s need for adrenaline leads her to a friendship with Jacob (Obstacle 3–yes, this counts) and starts to love him despite herself. Laurent arrives and tries to eat Bella (Obstacle 4) and tells her that Victoria is out there trying to hunt her as revenge (Obstacle 5). But then Alice comes and Jacob unintentionally tells Edward that Bella is dead; Edward decides to commit suicide (Obstacle 6). Bella saves Edward from the Volturi (Obstacle 7) and they are reunited (Reunion of the Lovers).

Eclipse:

Love Story: Bella and Edward are in love (Status Quo), but Bella wants to keep her friendship with Jacob (Obstacle 3). Jacob is also opposed to Bella being with Edward for both ethical and personal reasons (Obstacle 3 again). Victoria is still hunting Bella but now she is making a whole new army (Obstacle 5 again). Bella realizes she loves Jacob in a potential-love-interest-way (Obstacle 3) but still chooses Edward (Resolution). The lovers decide to get marries (Couple Triumphs).

Breaking Dawn:

Bella and Edward get married (Status Quo). Bella and Edward make love, leaving Bella happy but bruised, which pains Edward so much he refuses to make love to her again (Obstacle 1). Bella seduces him successfully (Resolution) but then falls pregnant (Obstacle 2). The pregnancy is high risk, causing dissension between the two (Obstacle 3) but Bella convinces Edward to go along with her plan (Resolution). Bella delivers her baby and turns into a vampire (Resolution). She learns the ropes of vampirism (Obstacle 4) and harbors no romantic feelings for Jacob anymore; Jacob imprinted on Renesmee so he has no more love for Bella (Resolution). Irina finds out about Renesmee and think she is an immortal child, and tells the Volturi (Obstacle 5). This leads the Cullens to call their friends and prepare for any eventuality, and Bella learns to use her power (Obstacle 6). The Volturi come and try various excuses to execute the Cullens (Obstacle 7) but they are able to defend themselves aptly. The Volturi leave and Bella and Edward can finally be together with their little family (Couple Triumphs).

As you can see, a lot of Twilight's Obstacles double as Proofs of Love what with Edward and Bella saving each other constantly. That is perfectly acceptable and in fact a very common doubling in romance.

What Is Not A Romance?

Romances do have to have some provisos, a couple of quid pro quos. Again, though, there are some exceptions and writers can and will break the rules successfully.

They must be requited. Unrequited love on either side does not a main romance plot make. Unrequited love is mostly a romance subplot if that or as part of a love triangle.

They cannot be abusive (to each other). The lovers of a romance do not have to be good people at all. In fact, they (yes, it has to be both) can be bad or villainous…to other people. That said, their love must be actually mutual and good for each other, even redemptive. A couple who is bad for the world and each other defeats the point of a romance. Mutual enmity does not count (see: Enemies to Lovers).

Their love must be main plot. If the couple is not the focus of the plot, then it’s not a romance but a romance subplot. Subplots can be as complete or incomplete as they like, developed or underdeveloped, but they are subplots for a reason.

Can a romance focus on a beta couple as well? Generally no. In American romance novels, authors do set up the couple for the next installment, but that is not quite the same as page time and development. Romances focus on one couple at a time—once that couple’s love story is done, writers can move on to another couple’s romance. Stories that have more than one couple tend to be something else entirely.

What about second chance romance? Second chance romance is essentially the same as the Courtship Plot, since the work very rarely talks about the lovers’ relationship before they separated. So in plotwise it’s basically just like meeting each other for the first time.

What about love triangles? Unless Character C is framed as an obstacle in the overarching narrative, then love triangles do not really count; they are more for coming-of-age or slice-of-life fodder. Polyamorous couples, however, should count in theory if their story has the romance plot. But of course, that is the rarest kind of all.

Keep Calm and Love On

There are some unconventional romances out there, for sure. But they are ultimately rare; the standard romance plot should fit most works accepted as such. As always, romantic tropes and dynamics are neither good or bad—they all largely depend on the the execution.

The only plot that may be confusable with the romance is the marriage plot, which is something different. Marriage Plots are essentially comedies of manners and they may or may not include romantic love or attraction as a major plot element. They are less about the couple’s erotic compatibility and more about their social compatibility. Austen’s works come the readiest to mind; a contemporary example would probably be Crazy Rich Asians. Otherwise Marriage Plots have much of the same beats as a romance.

So if you’re not sure if X is a romance, see how it fits within this plot. Nine times out of ten, you should get your answer.

#romance #fiction #literature #valentine’s day #love stories #i swear i didn’t plan on publishing it this valentine’s day #i was just writing it when i suddenly realized #sometimes the forces of the universe are in my favor #romeo and juliet #twilight #should i have talked about bodice rippers? #those are basically rom coms with actual sex

[sleepychailatte-blog]

When I was in school, there seem to be a camp of two types of girls when it came to literary choices. You had the Twilight/vampire romance girlies and the Hunger Games/dystopian gals, and you would have thought these two groups were the two families from Romeo and Juliet. Yours truly was part of the Hunger Games camp, and middle-school me was obsessed. I’m talking book and movie premieres, Team Peeta shirts from Hot Topic, wearing a mocking jay pin publicly, the whole gambit. God forbid if you read Twilight, that poorly written, low-brow, dumb, vampire romance. We were the readers of dystopian fiction, which was superior because it made you FEEL things about capitalism, broken societies, being true to yourself, etc. etc. etc.

It’s been over a decade since 2008. To all my Twilight girlies, I would like to offer you my most sincere apologies. I should not have judged you so harshly.

Recently I watched Twilight for the very first time as an adult. A friend of mine came over for a painting/movie night, and Twilight was our featured film. I knew the memes, I knew roughly what the plot was, but I wasn’t ready for the experience that was to come.

So without further ado, I’d like to offer my thoughts and review on the 2008 masterpiece, Twilight. If you aren’t familiar with the Twilight story, go read a quick synopsis and then come back.

🌘So, did you like it?

I had an absolute blast watching this movie. Would I say it’s a good movie? Probably not. Did it age well? Nope. But it was delightfully cringey, as you had to suspend all believe of realism. You couldn’t take this movie too seriously, because this movie took ITSELF way too seriously. It’s like they cranked the drama/teen angst meter up to 100 and everything seems so life-or-death…even though the main characters, Bella and Edward, are 17 year old juniors (ok so Edward actually isn’t 17 because he’s an old vampire but you get what I’m saying). It was very much that kind of relationship where “they can’t even bear to be apart or they will DIE” oh no how tragic (I think we now call that co-dependency).

When I was 17, I sure as heck didn’t know what love was. But again, this story is based in absolute fantasy, not realism, and that’s the fun part. Oh to be swept off your feet by a mysterious, handsome, brooding vampire that you met in your biology class!

🌓Favorite part of the film?

The script for this movie is pretty bad, I’m not gonna lie, and that’s part of the charm. It’s so bad, that it’s kinda good. Here’s some of my favorite quotes:

“You better hold on tight, spider monkey." -Edward to Bella because he can jump really high and run really fast. I about peed my pants from laughing when Edward said this.

“This is the skin of a killer, Bella." -Edward to Bella because vampire skin *literally sparkles* in direct sunlight. Again, almost peed my pants.

I will say that I love Edward’s family, the Cullens, as a whole. This vampire family tries to cook a regular meal for Bella, Edward’s human girlfriend, and oh my heart. Vampires don’t cook because they don’t eat normal food; the Cullen family had never used the kitchen in their house. The fact that they would go out of their way and attempt to do something so foreign to them in order to make the human girlfriend feel comfortable? Um, wow that’s actually really sweet.

Also, shout out to Bella‘s dad, Charlie for actually trying to connect with his daughter. Bella and Charlie have a bit of an awkward and tense relationship but this doesn’t stop Charlie from trying to be a good dad. I will say that one of my other favorite scenes was when Bella asked her dad if he wanted to meet her boyfriend Edward… while he was cleaning his shotgun. When he said, “sure, send (your boyfriend) in” and loudly snapped his shotgun shut, I about lost it. What a dad move! A national treasure.

🌒Would you watch it again?

Under the right circumstances. I would need either anesthesia or a large sangria. If I ever showed this film to my children, it would be for a study of what not to do in a relationship. If your significant other says “I can’t live without you” when you’re 17…that’s some big creepy co-decency energy.

🌑Team Edward or Team Jacob?

Um Team Charlie all the way. Hands down the best and most sane character in this whole film. We love to see a dad do his best and love his daughter…even when she starts dating a super weird pale dude.

🌘Conclusion

Watching this film made me think about guilty pleasures. We all have them, and they all look different at unique stages of our life. One of my favorite guilty pleasures is watching Judge Judy. My 70 year-old grandmother used to watch the Bachelor. For a friend of mine, it’s those cheesy Hallmark Channel movies. Others enjoy vampire romance novels. Are these things high-quality and sophisticated? No. Are they of good taste? Meh. But they are meant to be enjoyed, and that’s the whole point.

Twilight is the same way. Is it good? Not really. But that doesn’t matter, because it’s a cringey/angsty teen fantasy that’s meant to be enjoyed.

You can be both a Twilight girlie and a Hunger Games gal, and still have a pretty darn good time 🖤

#twilight saga #twilight meme #edward cullen #bella swan #movie review #twilight movies #spider monkey

[best--dress]

This post was prompted by a very thoughtful post, by a gay man, about women who write fanfic (and original fiction) about gay men - I’m not responding on top of his post bc I cannot find it for the life of me, but also because I don't want this in any way to be interpreted as "yes, but". I'm going off on tangents of my own, different directions, talking about my own experiences that aren't necessarily related, and I don't want to take away from his words ~ but I do mention it for context as to where my tangent started.

---

I've noticed a lot of fic writers & artists in the Carry On/Simon Snow fandom are lesbians or bi women (I'm a bi cis woman, and writing this solely from that perspective). [sidenote - is this fandom inherently different because the Simon/Baz pairing is canon? (although for a lot of us, it serves as wish fulfillment for a Harry/Draco pairing)]

The author of the post mentioned above said that women writing m/m slash are engaging in a form of fetishism. I'm not going to argue against this! But I am going to go in a different direction and examine my own experiences -

I'm curious about where we see ourselves in Simon/Baz and similar pairings. What am I getting out of this? These words from adrienne marie brown resonate with me here:

are you, or people who look like you, included in your fantasies? (pleasure activism, pg 224)

I can’t remember where I read this - please send me the reference if you know it! - but there's an idea that adolescent girls have such ardent love for boy bands and male idols because loving them is a safe way to live out romantic impulses, without getting hurt. An adolescent girl engaging in a romantic relationship with an adolescent boy introduces a power dynamic - boys hold more power than girls in the real world. An adolescent girl engaging in a one-sided idolization of a male celebrity is (maybe?) engaging in romance with herself.

So this leads me to entertain the idea that writing and generally swooning over fictional m/m relationships is a way for women to explore a different power dynamic, one that isn’t available to them in the real world, a power dynamic in which the subjects have equal power in the realm of gender to each other and MORE power in the realm of gender than women do. (this is super simplified and doesn’t take into account intersectional identities; race disability etc; but hopefully you get the general idea of what i’m saying :)

And then I ALSO question, for me personally, why isn't there a f/f pairing that captures my heart as ardently as Simon/Baz? Outside of the Carry On universe, the one thing that comes to mind is Emily and Sue from apple tv's Dickinson. (I mean, I'm glad at least I came up with something! But they don't have my whole heart the way Simon and Baz do.) I think part of the answer here is internalized homophobia (let's not forget those times the word "lesbian" was used against me as a slur on the playground in middle school).

what do you want to be turned on by? can you even imagine it? (also pleasure activism, pg 224)

&& quick disclaimer that this shouldn't be taken as criticism of anyone. this fandom is superbly kind; I think you're all gorgeous. <3

#mildly incoherent rambling #i know i'm not the first person to write about this #i'm mainly writing to myself #snowbaz #my writing

[beep3]

So spoilers for X-Men #30 ahead

Talon died as she lived, doing pretty much nothing other than existing to serve Synch’s development as a character.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m almost happy she’s gone, I hated Talon and pretty much everything she stood for. From the very beginning the idea of splitting Laura into two characters is just dumb. The only reasoning I can identify is that Marvel wanted to satisfy the fans that wanted Laura to stay as Wolverine and keep her character development from years of comics, and the ‘fans’ that insist she should go back to being X-23, both in title and personality.

Which of course is inherently dumb, anyone who wants Laura to go back to using that name clearly doesn’t understand the character in the slightest, and probably hasn’t read many of her comics either. It’s beyond easy to say that she would *despise* having to go by X-23 again, it goes against pretty much every aspect of her character arc, anyone who insists she should return to being X-23 almost definitely doesn’t actually care about Laura’s personality or character, they just don’t want her to have the Wolverine mantle, feel free to fill in the blanks for why that is. Although I’m sure they’ll insist they wouldn’t mind if she went by another mantle instead, like talon.

Regardless, Talon always felt like a low-effort way of making Laura act like she did as X-23 again, with the added effect of tying her entirely to a random relationship of one-sided character development.

So I can’t say I’m too choked up that Talon died, but the realisation that this is the ‘original’ Laura Kinney that we watched escape the Facility, make human connections for the first time, progress and learn to be more than a weapon, to learn that she’s a real person who is valued and loved, the character we saw grow for over twenty years of comics in such an insanely well-executed character arc, the idea that *this* is how she died, doing nothing other than serving Synch’s development is just outright sickening. Or at least it is to me, someone who is way too invested in a fictional comic character for their own good lmao.

Not enough people talk about how random their relationship is, Laura and Everett interacted maybe *once* in their entire publication histories before the Vault, and randomly over one issue they end up in a relationship, no setup, no real interaction, they just apparently decided to start dating because they were trapped in the vault for hundreds of years?

I’ve always believed Laura was queer, Craig Kyle has stated a desire to write a story about it, Marjorie Liu even supposedly intended it in Laura’s solo series, I don’t mind if she’s bi, a lesbian, trans, etc, but even outside of a queer relationship there were *countless* other characters Laura has formed bonds with over the years that would of made more sense than just randomly deciding to have her date a completely random character out of nowhere.

Of course this isn’t the first time it’s happened, Laura has a weird history of romance that pretty much constantly caused that to happen. Angel did the same, and even practically abused Laura, mocking her for cutting herself, and generally mistreating her throughout their relationship.

Throughout New X-Men her relationship was pretty similar, focusing a lot more on Julian’s/Hellion’s development more than her own, of course in Marjorie Liu’s X-23 series the tables got turned and the inverse happened, so I guess that evens things out?

Regardless, the relationship with Synch feels especially creepy, trapping Laura in a vault for years and basically forcing a relationship is dodgy enough, but the way it’s phrased in this panel is just even creepier.

Is there really a message to take from all of this? Not one that I can find. Maybe that Laura just has bad luck with the number 30? Pretty sure All-New X-Men #30 is when Laura’s creepy relationship with Angel started. It’s interesting that Talon or Wolvie-Laura didn’t die like how she was foreshadowed to in the Infinity Comics.

I guess the real potential message you can take is that Talon isn’t *really* dead? My best guess is that they’re going to telepathically fuse both Laura’s together again, which I guess is the best case scenario, I can only hope the Synch relationship doesn’t follow…

#Laura Kinney #wolverine #x-23 #x23 #x-men #xmen #marvel comics #dumb rant by someone too invested into fictional comic characters #xspoilers #x-spoilers #x-men 30 spoilers

[weiner-enjoyer]

welcome to my ted talk.

this is a post about romances that are written and viewed through the lense of a partner being a deity. mostly talking about fictional characters. this is also me being an anthropology nerd

the earliest example of this that i can think of is greek mythology. as is with most things. in greek mythology, there are likely hundreds of examples of gods courting animals and humans alike, though not always consensually. for the purpose of this post i’ll only be looking at the consensual ones. specifically, we can use the example of ariadne and dionysus.

ariadne and dionysus have one of those princess-in-a-dungeon love stories. king minos, a scary bull, put ariadne in a labyrinth, and dionysus saves her because she’s beautiful. to my knowledge, whether or not ariadne loved him isn’t fully explained. the reason i include this example is that it specifically shows a sort of weakness of the gods; love. almost all gods, in almost all mythologies, are capable of love, and it is almost always their downfall.

this idea of love as a downfall is different from what we usually think of with god-complex relationships. usually, one person is so delusional and in love that they view a partner as a god. but in most ancient examples, these stories are told in relation to the god and not the mortal. so why are gods, especially in greek mythology, so attracted to mortals?

there’s an aspect of rebellion to it. gods and humans are meant to be separated, as demonstrated by titanomachy, the war between humans and gods. but after several thousand years, you would get tired of having affairs with your cousins, right?

that brings me to my next conclusion; it’s simply because love happens. even nephthys, the ancient egyptian goddess, is capable of love; she was depicted as lesbian or bisexual in order to function as being unable to have kids. love is a force that not even the gods themselves can escape, though they often find solace in it.

gods who have affairs with humans are typically not well off. take zeus for example. sure, he’s the king of kings, god of gods, but his life is a mess. everyone hates him, including his wife, and he’s kind of a tyrant. but humans view him as mighty as ever, fearing and loving him just as ever. he finds that power he lost in the humans, so he harvests it.

so where do we get the stereotypical yandere god-loving romances? humans in relationships with gods are never treated with dignity, if they get to live in the first place. why is it so desirable?

i think, in some ways, gods sometimes see us above them in the same way we see them above us. lets go back to the idea of gods finding solace in human relationships; you could argue that the gods would be zealous of humans. we have much less to worry about. in the same way, humans honor gods for many reasons, but in the very core of their supernatural being; the fact that they can just generally handle more, be better, be perfect, even.

the yandere god-loving romance, without doing too much research, may just come from that dynamic. that, as humans, we should worship that which is better than us, and maybe we’ll get some kind recognition in return.

i should note that i have done zero research and i just like talking.

thank you for listening to my ted talk.

#i dont expect anyone to read this #im just autistic #anthropology #archaeology #zeus #greek mythology #dionysus #ariadne #nephthys #ancient egyptians #ancient egypt #ancient egyptian mythology #im a nerd #gods #religion

[kjmsupremacist]

pink (like the holes in your heart) (ryujin/yeji)

Yeji leads a completely ordinary life—she works in a cafe by day, and dances at a club by night. She has friends, and her life is good. For the most part, she’s content. But one night, she meets a hot older woman, and opens a new world full of new dangers and new delights.

Chapter 2   |   prev   next   mlist

Characters: Yeji, Ryujin, the rest of itzy

Genre: romance, fluff, angst, smut, age gap, stripper!au

Pairing: Ryujin/Yeji

Warnings: AGE GAP (older ryujin, younger yeji), d/s themes, mommy kink, bdsm and general rough treatment, alcohol mentions, sex work (nothing wild)

Rating: Explicit

Length: 9.9k

I put this disclaimer on all my age gaps - I don’t condone large age gaps in real life as these relationships tend to have an imbalanced power dynamic. However, because this is fiction, I can warp the world to my liking and guarantee everything is the way I want. Also, it’s fiction, and we’re all just here to have fun. If you don’t think you’re going to have fun, you can leave the way you came. I promise it’ll be fine.

listen to the official playlist here!

The haze lasts through the following morning, but dissipates by the afternoon. Yeji takes Yuna and Chaeryeong out to a fancy dinner, paying with a couple of the hundred dollar bills that the woman tipped her with. They all giggle when the waiter’s eyes nearly pop out of his head at the sight of them.

The next afternoon sees Yeji and Yuna at their cafe, Yuna on the register and Yeji at the bar making drinks. It’s the middle of the week, so not horribly busy, which means they can gossip between waves of customers. Yuna tells her about the professor who’s being investigated for a multitude of Title IX violations, each worse than the last. Yeji makes faces and offers snide commentary as she cleans their tools off.

They’re getting near the end of their shift when the bell on the door rings. Yeji doesn’t look up at first, intent on getting a stain out of a mug.

“Welcome in, how can I help you today?” Yuna chirps.

“Could I get a medium latte, please? To go.” The voice is familiar, and Yeji snaps her head up.

It’s the woman from that night. She’s in professional wear this time, a stylish grey pantsuit with a crisp white button-down underneath. She has a sleek black shoulder bag and a silver watch; it flashes in the light as she taps her card to the reader. Yeji didn’t even realize she’d completed the transaction. Her ears are full of ringing.

Yeji ducks her head, heart racing, accepting the cup from Yuna and getting started on the espresso shots. Maybe she doesn’t recognize me, Yeji thinks wildly. I’ll just pretend I don’t know her. It was dark in the club, anyway, and I was wearing lots of makeup. 

And not much of anything else, a different voice in her head supplies unhelpfully. 

She turns the cup over in her hands. Ryujin. Her name is Ryujin. It sticks in Yeji’s brain without her even trying, but she repeats it anyway. Ryujin. She steams the milk, taps the pitcher on the counter, then pours it carefully into the cup. She considers a heart for the latte art, but decides that’s a little too forward and goes with a swan instead. 

“Latte for Ryujin,” Yeji calls, setting the drink on the pickup counter and hoping her voice doesn’t shake.

Ryujin strolls up, and it takes Yeji one look to know she’s completely busted. She’s smirking, and her gaze pins Yeji to the spot. She reaches for her drink but doesn’t pick it up. “Hi,” she says softly.

“Hi,” Yeji manages.

“Now the club I could understand, but what’s a pretty girl like you doing in a cafe?” Ryujin picks up the latte, studying the art; Yeji thinks she sees amusement flash across her face. “You’re far too talented to spend your life making coffee.” She takes a sip and nods. “As good as your coffee is.” 

Yeji doesn’t know what to say. Thank you? Or sorry my job isn’t prestigious enough for you, some of us are poor? “We really shouldn’t be talking to each other,” she says instead. “Privacy is important.”

“Indeed.” Ryujin reaches into her pocket and produces a business card. “Well, since I know about your day job, it’s only fair that you know about mine.” She slides it across the counter to Yeji. “Mutually assured destruction, hm?”

Yeji takes it, unsure. “You really want to give this to me?”

“You don’t seem malicious,” Ryujin says with a smile. “Working tonight?”

“Ah, no,” Yeji says, truthfully. “Later this week, though.”

“Then I’ll see you around.” Ryujin’s eyes linger on her; there’s nothing too intense about it, but Yeji gets the distinct feeling that she’s being carefully observed. “Yeji.”

And with that, she’s gone, leaving behind the faint scent of cologne.

Yeji looks down at the business card. It’s a matte black with gold lettering. Shin Ryujin. A & R Director. All In Entertainment. There’s an address, an email, and a list of phone numbers. Yeji zeroes in on the one labeled “c.” Is this her way of giving me her number?

“Was that her?” Yuna’s speaking just above a whisper, even though they’re alone in the shop. 

“Hm?” Yeji looks up and sees Yuna looking back at her intently.

“Your sugar mommy from the club,” Yuna says, and Yeji groans.

“She’s not my—yes, that was the woman from a couple days ago.” She holds up the business card. “She gave me this.”

“Ooh, lemme see!”

“No.” Yeji pockets it. “It would be bad practice to give out my client’s personal information.”

“You’re no fun,” Yuna complains.

“I don’t want to get fired,” Yeji says, giving her an exasperated look.

“I know.” Yuna blinks. “So are you gonna call her?”

“What, on her work cell? Or the front desk?” Yeji shakes her head, cringing at the thought. “What would I even say? No, if she wants to see me again, she can come back to the club. She knows where to find me.”

* * *

Yeji heads to Chaeryeong’s place for dinner that night. She decides to leave the business card at home—what she said to Yuna was true, and it should go double for someone else who works at Crown, even if that someone is her best friend.

“You said you had news,” Chaeryeong says when she opens the door.

“Hello to you too,” Yeji says, slipping inside.

“Yes, hello.” To her credit, Chaeryeong does give her a hug and usher her into her living room. “Sorry, I’m just nosy! Sit. Do you want something to drink?”

“I’ll drink after I eat,” Yeji says, settling on the couch and opening a pair of chopsticks.

Chaeryeong sits too, untying the takeout bags. “Okay, so what happened?”

“The woman from the other night,” Yeji says. “She stopped by the cafe.”

Chaeryeong freezes. “What the fuck? How did she know you were there?”

“I don’t think she did,” Yeji defends. “We are near the business district, I think she just popped by for a coffee. It sounded like she’d been there before, she knew exactly what she was ordering.”

“Yeah, and you’ve been working there for how long?” Chaeryeong argues. “You’ve never seen her before.”

“I usually don’t work afternoons,” Yeji points out, which is true. “Maybe it’s her afternoon stop.”

“Right.” Chaeryeong sounds entirely unconvinced. “So what did she say?”

“Something about how my talent is wasted in a cafe,” Yeji begins. Chaeryeong makes a noise of protest. “No, I know. I don’t think she meant it to be so condescending, though.”

“Why are you giving her so much benefit of the doubt?” Chaeryeong asks. “Just because she’s hot? You don’t even like women.”

Yeji chews on her lower lip. “I dunno, maybe I do,” she says slowly. Chaeryeong raises her eyebrows. “The dance I gave her—there was something there! I’m usually really prudent with my customers, you know that. But…” She shakes her head. “There was something about her. I think… I’d like to chase that, find out what it was, exactly.”

Chaeryeong’s eyes soften. “That’s fair,” she agrees.

“Anyway,” Yeji says, deciding not to have a sexuality crisis in Chaeryeong’s living room, “she gave me her business card, saying, like, if she knows my day job then it’s only fair I know hers so we both have blackmail material?”

“Where does she work?” Chaeryeong asks immediately.

“You know I can’t tell you that,” Yeji replies. “Crown’s all about discretion. Mom would have kittens.”

“I know, but just this once?” Chaeryeong pouts at her, but Yeji knows she’s joking.

“No,” Yeji says, swatting her anyway. “What I will tell you is that she’s a director at some big, fancy company.”

“You better be careful,” Chaeryeong says, sobering and pointing her chopsticks at her. “Those exec types are not to be messed with.”

“I’m not messing! I told her I was working later this week, and she said she’d see me around. That’s all.” Yeji shoves a piece of broccoli into her mouth decisively.

“Well,” Chaeryeong says, “just remember that it’s best to milk her of all the money you can get, and then leave it at that. Don’t get involved, and definitely don’t let her do you any favors. Because then you’ll belong to her, and that’s too dangerous.”

“I just don’t think she’s like that,” Yeji says.

“Well, there has to be something in it for her,” Chaeryeong points out. “For her to be giving you this kind of attention.”

Yeji rolls her eyes. “Yeah, that I’m young and hot, duh.”

Chaeryeong shoves her, and Yeji laughs. 

Yeji knows Chaeryeong’s right, but she can’t help but think about Ryujin throughout the week. She likes the way she feels when Ryujin’s eyes are on her. It’s scary, but it’s also exhilarating, and Yeji doesn’t know what to do with that. 

Thursday and Friday pass. Yeji works a full shift both nights, and though she keeps an eye out, she doesn’t catch a single glimpse of Ryujin. Either she’s really good at hiding, or she’s just busy. Yeji has a feeling it’s the latter—it might be self-centered of her, but she has to imagine that if Ryujin were there, she would seek Yeji out. Still, she can’t help but feel a little disappointed. She doesn’t know what to do with that, either.

Saturday night comes, and Yeji has another solo dance scheduled. She leafs through her wardrobe carefully. Her hope that Ryujin will be there has started to dwindle, but she wants to look extra nice just in case. After a lot of contemplating, she settles on a gold set with black detailing—a pretty bra with black lacing up the center and the straps, and a matching thong that has cutouts in the waistband. The bottom half of the waistband she lets settle naturally; the elastic strings on the top she hooks on her waist above her hip bones. She twists in the mirror, adds a lacy black thigh garter with some gold jewelry, and plucks up a pair of flashy gold pumps. If Ryujin is there tonight, she won’t be able to miss her. 

“Oh wow, Lucy,” a girl named Winter gushes when Yeji steps out of her cargo pants backstage. “I love that set! It’s so pretty on you.”

“Thank you,” Yeji replies, smoothing the straps of the waistband. “I wanted to stand out tonight.”

“You look like C-3PO,” Chaeryeong says, but she bends down to kiss the top of Yeji’s head, grinning. “Kidding. I love the way that bra makes your tits look. Everybody’s gonna want you.”

“You think?” Yeji asks.

“Yes,” Chaeryeong says quietly. “Even her, if she ever shows up.”

“It’s not for her,” Yeji lies. “It’s for me.”

“Okay,” Chaeryeong says mildly.

Yeji finishes getting ready early, says hi to Mom, and then goes to wait in the wings so she can watch the other girls perform. She smiles, watching Karina and Winter’s duet. Maybe she and Chaeryeong should do something like that; though Yeji can’t see the audience, she hears cheers go up. They seem quite popular. She files it away to pitch to Chaeryeong later. 

Karina and Winter are waving to the crowd. Yeji stands, whispering, “Great job!” when they pass her in the wings. Karina squeezes her arm and mouths thank you in response.

The lights change, and Yeji straightens her back and strolls out onto the stage, offering the crowd a smirk and a wave, taking her position in the center of the stage. It’s a choreography she’s practiced for a while, so it comes easily, her limbs already familiar with the moves. 

She tells herself not to search through the audience, but she finds her eyes flitting from face to face as she dances. There’s something to be said for eye contact—it makes the dance feel more personal—but that’s not Yeji’s end goal.

And then she lands on a familiar face, and nearly freezes. 

It’s Ryujin, alone in the crowd. She’s wearing an oversized black suit jacket and what looks like a cropped leather tank top. Her nails are a glossy black; Yeji can see them against the vibrant blue of the drink she’s holding in one hand. Their eyes meet, and Ryujin raises the martini glass to her lips, holding Yeji’s gaze over the rim.

Yeji tears her eyes away, refocusing on her performance, but it would be a lie to say she doesn’t think of Ryujin with every move she makes. Yes, she’s in front of an audience, but this dance has become for Ryujin, and Ryujin alone. She knows Ryujin knows it, can feel her eyes following her even though she doesn’t look back once.

At last, her song is over. She blows a few kisses and hurries backstage to do a couple of touch-ups. Chaeryeong is there, fighting with one of the straps on her bra.

“Lemme help,” Yeji says, coming up behind her. She adjusts it carefully, then looks up over Chaeryeong’s shoulder and catches her eye in the mirror. “She’s here,” she says softly. “She saw me.”

Chaeryeong smiles, turning around and brushing a strand of Yeji’s hair out of her face. “Good. Go get the fattest paycheck of your life,” she says.

Yeji swallows. “What if I don’t want her to pay me?” she whispers. “What if I just want her?” 

Chaeryeong sighs, but she doesn’t lose her smile. “Then go get her,” she says softly. Yeji blinks in surprise. “Look,” she says. “I’m not saying it’s smart. But this is bigger than money, and bigger than her. You think you like her? You think you can learn something about yourself in the process?” Yeji nods. “Then just be safe. That’s all I can ask.” She squeezes Yeji’s hand.

Yeji squeezes back. “Thanks,” she manages. 

“You look hot,” Chaeryeong continues. “She’ll be stupid to say no.” She nudges Yeji. “Go,” she says. “I need to fix my makeup.”

“Okay.” Yeji lets go of her hand and walks out the door and onto the floor. She weaves between people, nodding hello to a few regulars, but not pausing as she heads to where she saw Ryujin when she was onstage. 

She’s still there, waiting for her. Her black slacks are carefully tailored; they fit perfectly around her waist, and Yeji tries not to stare at the curve of her hips, her thighs. Ryujin smiles when she sees her, purple lipstick in stark contrast against her perfect white teeth, and everything around Yeji seems to fall away. Even the music seems faint. All Yeji can hear is the pounding of her heart. The lights strobe overhead, and Yeji has to watch Ryujin’s mouth to make out what she says.

“Hey, babygirl.”

Yeji tries not to melt. She gets closer, so they can actually hear each other, and then says, “Where’s your girlfriend? Or did you not bring her this time?”

Ryujin blinks, startled, but then understanding dawns and she laughs. “Getting jealous already?” she teases. “But all I did was give you my number.”

“You gave me your business card,” Yeji retorts. “What was I supposed to do, call and leave a message with your secretary as ‘Lucy from the club’?”

Ryujin laughs again. “I guess that’s fair,” she says. “No, the woman with me last time isn’t my girlfriend. She’s a good friend of mine, that’s all.”

“Noted,” Yeji says, somewhat placated.

“I meant what I said, though,” Ryujin continues. “Your talent is wasted at that cafe. And—it’s wasted here.”

Yeji bristles. The coffee shop is one thing—making lattes has nothing to do with dancing. Her job here, though, is another matter. “Being a stripper is a perfectly valid profession, and the only reason society considers it indecent is because of puritanical culture and sexism, and it’s really rich of you to look down on my job when you’re literally a customer h—”

 “That’s not what I meant,” Ryujin cuts in gently. “I meant you could go professional. Today. If you wanted. You’re not just good at shaking your ass, you can actually, really dance. You know what I do for a living. I would know.” Yeji quiets, surprised. “I have a great deal of respect for dancers and sex workers, but it’s just a different kind of work. And you have the skill to be a performer on an international stage. You’re right, it would be hypocritical of me to have something against your job here. But I don’t.”

Yeji feels clumsy as she tries to find the words to respond. “Oh. Thank you, then. But…” She thinks about all her dance lessons as a kid, all her big dreams, her crushed hopes. She’d wanted to be a singer once upon a time, hadn’t she? And she’d failed. “If I was that good, I would already have a job somewhere else,” she says. “And besides, I have friends here now. And the money’s good. I don’t want to abandon this.”

Ryujin nods. “I can understand that,” she agrees. “Then—do you have time for another dance? For me?”

Yeji presses her lips together. Then go get her, Chaeryeong’s voice echoes in her brain. Yeji wants more. Yeji wants her. It feels wrong for Ryujin to pay her for a dance when they could be doing something else instead. 

She shakes her head, looking up at Ryujin, and sees disappointment flicker across her face. “I don’t want to dance for you,” she says. “I think I want—I want something else.” The disappointment clears, replaced by sharp interest. “And I don’t want you to pay me for it. Be-because I want it.”

Ryujin’s lips stretch into a lazy smile. Yeji almost feels like a mouse in the jaws of a cat—caught, death imminent and inevitable. But where there should be fear, there’s something else. Oh. Desire.

“I see,” Ryujin says slowly. “That sounds good, too.”

“Can you wait until the end of my shift?” Yeji asks, feeling a little stupid. “It’ll be around three, I know it’s late.”

“Not a problem, baby,” Ryujin says, and Yeji has to suppress a shiver. “It’s a Saturday, I can stay up late.” She turns, points at a booth near the bar. “Make lots of money, okay? I’ll be right there, watching you. Come get me when you’re done.”

“Okay,” Yeji agrees dizzily. 

The rest of the night passes slow and excruciating. Yeji tries to keep her focus, but she knows her customers can tell she’s a little distracted. She feels Ryujin’s eyes on her wherever she goes, can picture her expression even when she’s not looking—eyes half-lidded, but gaze clear and full of intent. Whenever she checks to see if Ryujin really is still there, she finds her staring back, same as always. 

Finally, Yeji’s shift ends and she waves to Ryujin to let her know she’ll be out in a minute. Ryujin nods, and Yeji ducks into the dressing room. The club stays open until five on the weekends, but Yeji rarely works the latest shift—Mom doesn’t like the younger girls to be out super late. 

Chaeryeong’s taking her makeup off the mirror, and her eyes snap to Yeji as soon as she enters.

“I think I’m going home with her,” Yeji whispers when she sits down.

“Keep your location on,” Chaeryeong replies. “Women can be murderers too.”

“That’s it? You’re not going to tell me not to?” Yeji asks as she unclasps her bra. “Thank god. I forgot how itchy the glitter is.” She puts on a simple, comfy bra instead. Ryujin’s already seen her dressed up. She doesn’t need to keep the lingerie. 

“I know there’s no stopping you,” Chaeryeong says. “And if something happens, I’ll just ask Yuna for the CCTV footage from the cafe.”

“You listen to too much true crime,” Yeji replies, stepping into a clean pair of plain cotton undies and then shimmying her cargo pants up. “I’ll be fine. I won’t get murdered. I promise.”

“You better not.” Chaeryeong waits for Yeji to finish pulling her shirt on, then reaches out for a hug. “Text me when you get there, okay?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Yeji salutes, then zips up her bag and slings it over her shoulder, bending to adjust her shoes. “Okay, I’m off. Have a good night. Get home safe.”

“Thank you,” Chaeryeong says.

Yeji stops by Mom’s office to punch out and hear her total. Less than usual for a Saturday night, but Yeji’s about to go meet the reason why, so she thanks Mom with a smile and a wave, and heads back out to the bar.

Ryujin is exactly where she left her, and she stands when she sees her approaching, tapping away at her phone. She looks up when Yeji reaches her table. “Ordered us an Uber,” she says. “All set?”

Yeji nods. “I think so.”

“Then c’mon. It’ll be here in a few minutes.” Ryujin sets down a few bills next to her empty glass and leads them to the door. 

It’s a little chilly out, but not unbearable, so Yeji doesn’t bother trying to find her jacket. Ryujin takes them to the curb, leaning up against a signpost. She seems content with not talking, staring out at the street. Yeji follows her gaze and sees nothing in particular—just neon lights and the occasional car. It’s late, nearing four at this point, and the city is quieting.

“I have a confession,” Yeji blurts.

“Yeah?” Ryujin gazes back at her, calm and a little amused.

“You’re going to be the first woman I’ve ever been with,” Yeji says, heart hammering. “I mean, you’re the first woman I’ve ever been interested in.”

Ryujin smiles. “I could tell,” she says gently. “I don’t mind. I don’t care about your history, as long as you’re sure you’re interested in me.”

Yeji nods emphatically. It’s confusing, and she can unpack what it all means and figure out exactly how she feels later, but what is crystal clear in her head is that she likes Ryujin. A lot. “I’m sure,” she says.

“That’s good, then.” Ryujin’s phone buzzes in her hand, and she peels herself off the pole. A sleek black car pulls up to the curb. “This is us.”

Yeji tries her hardest not to look surprised. The driver gets out and opens the door for them, taking Yeji’s bag and placing it in the trunk. It must be the luxury service, Yeji thinks to herself as she ducks into the car. She’d heard of it, but considering she can barely afford a regular Uber, she doesn’t even know the name. She glances sideways at Ryujin, who’s clicking her seatbelt into place. She knew she was rich, but somehow it hadn’t really hit her until right now. I wonder what her place looks like.

“Are you hungry?” Ryujin asks softly once they pull away and head down the street.

“A little,” Yeji admits. 

“Good, me too,” Ryujin replies. “I have some leftovers we can heat up when we get home.”

“Sounds good,” Yeji agrees. When we get home. Suddenly, Yeji’s life seems small and lonely. Imagine if she had someone she could come home to every night after work! Sure, she has her friends, but they’re all their own people, and though they love each other very much, and spend what is probably an inordinate amount of time together, there’s still plenty of time leftover where it’s just Yeji, by herself.

And it’s not that she can’t stand her own company. She doesn’t mind being alone; solitude is good, necessary. But… She watches Ryujin out of the corner of her eye. The idea that tomorrow, and for many, many more days of her life, she’ll be going back to her empty apartment feels a little miserable. 

But that’s not tonight. Yeji gives herself a little shake. Tonight she has an entirely separate set of problems to worry about, and they start and end with the woman sitting next to her. Though Ryujin told her not to worry, Yeji can’t help but be a little anxious. She’s not a virgin, but sex with a woman has to be different, right? She’d never really considered it before, so she’d never even thought about what the rules were, what she needed to keep in mind, what she didn’t need to worry about.

It’s almost like Ryujin can feel her building herself up into a panic. She reaches out and places a hand on Yeji’s knee, rubbing her thumb back and forth, gentle and comforting. Yeji looks up at her, and Ryujin smiles. It’s okay, baby, she mouths, and Yeji finds herself relaxing into the seat.

Ryujin keeps her hand on Yeji’s knee until the car rolls to a stop outside a very tall and very fancy-looking apartment building. They step out of the car, retrieve Yeji’s bag, thank the driver. Ryujin offers Yeji her arm again, and Yeji takes it, feeling a thrill of excitement run through her whole body. 

They head into the elevator, and Ryujin punches the 13 button. “You’re not superstitious, are you?” she asks, grinning at Yeji.

Yeji giggles and shakes her head. “Not at all.”

“I always thought it was so silly, skipping certain numbers and pretending that does anything,” Ryujin says, still grinning. “I mean, you skip thirteen and go straight to fourteen, there’s still a thirteenth floor, it just has a different name. It bothered me a lot as a kid because it didn’t make any sense.” She shrugs one shoulder. “Though I suppose I’ve always been one for staring a problem right in the teeth instead of dressing it up.”

Yeji smiles. “I’m the same way,” she agrees. The elevator dings and the doors slide open. “But I think there’s room for harmless make-believe. Skipping the thirteenth floor is harmless, right?”

Ryujin nods as she leads Yeji down the hall to the only door on this side of the building, keys jingling in her hand. “That’s true, too.” She pushes the door open and enters, holding it for Yeji. “Shoes off, if you would.”

Yeji is already bending down to unzip her boots, and makes a face. “Please, I’m not an animal,” she says, and Ryujin laughs. Yeji savors the sound. It’s sweet and melodic and surprisingly bright. “At least, not about things like this.”

Ryujin laughs again as she closes the door, locking it and toeing her white sneakers off, nudging them into line against the wall. “Good,” she says simply. “Here, put your bag by the stairs, we can take it up later.”

Yeji does as she’s told and then follows Ryujin around the corner and into her kitchen. Ryujin turns on some lights and then pulls open her fridge. “We can heat up some tteokbokki, if that’s ok?”

“Yes please,” Yeji says, hovering by the counter. 

Ryujin sets a container on the counter and then sticks her head back in the fridge. “Anything to drink?”

“Just water, please,” Yeji replies.

Ryujin emerges with a yuja tea bottle, grinning. “So polite,” she teases. She uncovers the container and sticks it in the microwave, then gets a glass and fills it with water for Yeji, strolling up and handing it to her. “Cheers,” she says, clinking her unopened bottle of tea against the glass.

“Cheers,” Yeji giggles back, charmed, and takes a sip.

Ryujin sets her bottle down, and then shrugs off her suit jacket, draping it over the back of one of the chairs at the breakfast bar. She holds out her hand. “Dance with me.”

Yeji sets her glass down too, a little flustered but pleased, accepting Ryujin’s hand and letting her pull her closer. Ryujin wraps her other arm around her waist, bracing her hand against the small of Yeji’s back, and Yeji lets her other hand settle on Ryujin’s shoulder. Ryujin leads them in a little two-step sway around the kitchen, smiling at Yeji, and Yeji finds herself grinning back, unable to school her expression at all. 

“Ready, and twirl,” Ryujin says, extending her arm. Yeji laughs, twirling a little clumsily. Ryujin dips her, and then brings her back up, much closer than before. “You’re a natural,” she says, and Yeji giggles again, breathless.

“Mm, it’s almost like I dance for a living,” she says.

Ryujin’s smile grows wider. “Hm,” she hums in agreement. “Good thing, too. Or we would’ve never met.”

Yeji’s heart rate jumps. “Yeah,” she replies. “Good thing.”

Ryujin tilts her head, still swaying them. “I wanted to kiss you that night. Last week. You’re so pretty, baby.”

“You could kiss me now,” Yeji blurts.

“Oh, could I?” Ryujin’s tone is teasing and playful; she leans closer still. 

Yeji’s pretty sure she’s shaking, but she holds her ground. “Mm-hm,” she says, and Ryujin leans in and kisses her.

Her lips are soft and warm against Yeji’s. She’s gentle but firm, and Yeji kisses back almost hungrily, pressing closer. Heat floods her whole body, and any reservations she might have had dissipate instantly. Yeji wants. She’s never wanted like this before, and she’s dizzy with it now, head spinning—

And then the microwave beeps, and she almost screams. Ryujin pulls away, laughing. Her lipstick is just a little messy, but it almost makes her more beautiful. Yeji gasps softly, trying to slow her heart, trying to come back down to earth. 

“That scared me so bad,” she admits, and Ryujin laughs even harder as she opens the microwave and extracts the leftovers. 

“Sorry,” she says, setting the container now and kissing Yeji’s temple before going to find some chopsticks. “Sit, baby.”

Yeji sits, accepting the chopsticks that Ryujin passes to her and picking up a rice cake, blowing on it so she doesn’t scorch her mouth. Ryujin does the same, watching Yeji take her first bite.

“Oh my god, it’s so good,” Yeji gasps.

Ryujin grins. “It’s my friend’s restaurant,” she says. “She’s one of the best cooks I know.” She takes a bite. “Maybe we can go sometime. She’ll get us a private room if you’re worried.”

“I’d like that,” Yeji manages. “If it’s this good reheated, I can’t imagine what her food is like fresh.”

They finish eating quickly with minimal chitchat, both clearly more interested in what comes next. Ryujin throws their chopsticks in the sink, rinsing out the takeout container and throwing it in the recycling. Yeji sips at her water as she waits, feeling a little useless. 

Finally, Ryujin dries off her hands and turns to Yeji with a smile. “Alright, baby. Come with me.”

Yeji retrieves her bag and follows Ryujin up the stairs to her room. It’s only now that she really takes in her surroundings. Ryujin’s apartment is huge, and gorgeous. There are beautiful windows that look out over the city in almost every room. The floors are sleek hardwood, the walls painted a pristine white, the doorknobs all a flawless metal. Ryujin opens her bedroom door, turning on a lamp, and Yeji’s eyes grow wide.

She has a huge, beautiful black dresser along one wall, next to a small door that Yeji assumes leads to her closet. There’s a big jewelry organizer on top of the dresser, and a bunch of skincare products filed neatly in a box on the other side. Behind the dresser is a big, circular mirror with a brushed gold frame. Ryujin’s bed is simple, but sturdy. It looks like it’s made of bamboo, with a set of sheets in varying shades of muted blue. There’s a big window here, too; Ryujin goes to it and taps a panel on the wall, and blinds whir into place, giving them privacy from the neighbors across the street. There’s another door on the other side of the bed that’s been left ajar, and Yeji can make out pristine marble counters in the dark—it must be her bathroom.

“This place is stunning,” Yeji says softly, and Ryujin smiles.

“Thank you,” she says. “It helps that I don’t have kids. More money to spend on myself, you know. Go ahead and put your bag down by my dresser.”

Yeji drops her bag on the floor, still gazing around. There’s a huge art piece on the wall opposite the window, some pretty abstract painting in blues and golds. She startles when she feels a hand on her wrist.

“I’m going to take my makeup off,” Ryujin says. “Would you like to as well? You’re probably gonna get messy.”

Yeji almost shivers, snapping her eyes back to Ryujin. “Oh! Yes, please.” Maybe with a man she would’ve been nervous to reveal her bare face so quickly, but Ryujin will have to reveal hers, too. Besides, Yeji has a feeling Ryujin won’t think any differently of her, makeup or no makeup.

They head into the bathroom; Ryujin flicks on a light over the vanity. She has a gorgeous recessed tub in one corner, and a huge standing shower in the other. The tub is made of the same black marble as her counters; the floor is some kind of white tile, and it goes all the way up the walls of the shower, too. Ryujin pops open a container and pulls out a couple of cotton pads, pumping them on top of some kind of micellar water, and then handing a couple to Yeji.

Together, they take their makeup off, side by side and silent in front of the mirror. There’s something so sweet and intimate about it—two women, carefully wiping away the faces they show the public and letting each other see what’s underneath. Yeji rinses her face off and then straightens to find Ryujin already offering her a soft hand towel to pat her skin dry. 

“Moisturizer,” Ryujin murmurs, holding out a bottle and squeezing a pump out onto Yeji’s palm. Yeji smiles as she warms it between her hands and then taps it into her skin. There’s a comfort in this, an understanding Yeji has never had with any other partner.

“Thanks,” she says belatedly.

“Lemme see you, pretty girl,” Ryujin murmurs, and Yeji turns.

Ryujin looks less severe now, gentler and more subtle, but still just as attractive. The fine lines on her face are a little more prominent, but Yeji finds that she likes them, likes that Ryujin looks a little more mature. It makes her feel safe. 

“You have a freckle on the tip of your nose,” Ryujin whispers, smiling.

Yeji touches it, giggling. “Yeah,” she says. “Have had it since I was a kid.”

Ryujin leans forward, coaxing Yeji’s hand out of the way with a finger, and places a soft kiss on the spot. Yeji giggles. “It’s cute,” she says. “Okay, c’mon.” She takes one of Yeji’s hands, pulling her back out into the bedroom and turning the bathroom light off as she goes. “Get comfy,” she says, dropping Yeji’s hand and nodding her towards the bed.

Yeji sits, pulling her socks off and tossing them underhand into the corner while Ryujin goes to the lamp she turned on when they first came in and dims it. Satisfied, she returns to the bed, pausing to slip her socks off as well, one hand braced on the mattress, before climbing up to join Yeji.

“Hi, baby,” she says softly, crawling up next to her and giving her a kiss.

“Hi, mommy,” Yeji whispers back, and Ryujin’s smile turns a little darker. 

“Now that you mention it, we should probably talk about that,” Ryujin says.

“What?” Yeji asks, surprised.

“We’ve already established that we both like when you call me mommy,” Ryujin says. “So what else? What do you like, baby?”

Yeji considers it, thinking back to her past relationships. Her sex life has always been rather vanilla, she supposes. It’s not that she’s unaware of the options, it’s just that she never really knew how to bring it up. But now Ryujin is here, asking, and…

“I’m not sure,” Yeji admits softly. “I’ve never really—explored like that before.”

Ryujin remains unfazed. “But you want to,” she says.

Yeji’s breath hitches in her throat. “Yes.”

“Lucky for you, I have plenty of experience,” Ryujin says, corners of her lips curling up dangerously. “We can try things out, see what you like. The important thing is you make sure to tell me if something feels good or bad. Okay?” Yeji nods. “If something is bad, I want you to say red. Like stop. Even if I don’t ask you, okay?”

“Okay,” Yeji agrees. 

“I’ll check in from time to time, though, just in case. If everything is good, then you can say green,” Ryujin continues. “Yellow is somewhere in the middle—just that you’re not sure, that you want to slow down, maybe change something and then keep going, or maybe stop.”

“Like a traffic light,” Yeji giggles.

“Yes,” Ryujin says. “Now, is there anything you’ve been curious about?”

A thousand dirty things pop into Yeji’s head at once. She thinks Ryujin could do just about anything to her and she’d like it, but she should probably start small. “I like calling you mommy because I like—I think I like giving up control. I like the idea of you doing whatever you want with me.” 

“Mm, that’s good,” Ryujin says, tone almost blithe. “That’s what I want, too.” Her hands have found their way to Yeji’s waist, touches light and teasing. Yeji realizes she’s leaned back against the headboard, has let Ryujin corner her. “You want to give yourself over to me, baby?” 

“Yes,” Yeji breathes. She imagines it, imagines lying pliant, on her back or on her knees, following Ryujin’s every word. She imagines Ryujin sticking a couple of fingers in her mouth and making her gag on them, not letting her speak even when tears gather in her eyes. She imagines Ryujin making her come again and again, with her fingers or her tongue or a toy, or making her ride her thigh and not letting her stop, even when she gets tired and her legs shake. She imagines Ryujin tying her up and grabbing her hair and holding Yeji’s face against her pussy, and—

“What are you thinking about, babygirl?” Ryujin asks, pinching her waist and making her squeak. “You gotta tell me, or we won’t be able to make it happen.”

“I, I—” Yeji’s head already feels a little foggy. She doesn’t know the words to say what she wants. “I don’t know how to explain,” she says finally, sending Ryujin a helpless look.

Ryujin, luckily, shows mercy. “That’s okay, baby,” she soothes. “How about I suggest a few things, and you can tell me yes or no?”

“Okay,” Yeji agrees, settling. 

“You liked it when I pinched you,” Ryujin says. “Yes or no?”

“Yes,” Yeji says.

“You think you like pain?” Ryujin asks. Her hands have traveled down to the button of Yeji’s pants. “Can I?” She taps the button.

“Yes,” Yeji agrees. Suddenly, she wants nothing more than for both of them to be completely naked. Their clothes are just in the way, and she wants to see everything, to show Ryujin everything. “And—yes to pain.”

“Want mommy to spank you?” Ryujin is focused on getting Yeji out of her pants, but her voice is still measured and attentive.

“Yes,” Yeji agrees, lifting her hips so Ryujin can pull her pants down. She does it easily, unhooking the fabric from Yeji’s ankles and dropping her pants somewhere on the floor.

Ryujin bends down and kisses the soft skin of her inner thigh. For all the rough intent of her words, her touch is still gentle. Another kiss, higher this time, close to where Yeji can feel heat and wetness building, close to where Yeji wants so badly for Ryujin to touch her. Another kiss, over the tendon there that’s pulled taut. And then Ryujin raises her head, self-satisfied smirk only growing when Yeji whines. 

“And you like that I’m older than you,” Ryujin says softly. “Yes or no?”

Yeji swallows. “Yes,” she whispers. “I like it a lot.”

“Mm.” Ryujin comes back up to Yeji, gives her a quick kiss on the point of her jaw. “Why?”

“I don’t know,” Yeji says truthfully. There’s just something about it—maybe it’s the same sort of thing that makes her want to submit. Ryujin has all the power, all the control, and Yeji likes that. “I want—” The words are in her brain before she can even think of where they came from, but they’re true. “I want you to take advantage of me, mommy.”

Ryujin kisses the hollow of her throat with a low hum. “Does it make me a bad person if that’s what I want, too?” she murmurs.

Yeji shakes her head. “I don’t think so,” she says. “I’ve come to you willingly, haven’t I?”

“That’s true,” Ryujin says, her voice gaining a hard sort of edge to it. “Practically threw yourself at me tonight, what was I supposed to do?”

“Couldn’t help it,” Yeji says, truthful once again. “Haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.”

“What a coincidence.” Ryujin’s voice is soft and dangerous. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you, either.” She toys with the hem of Yeji’s shirt. “We can talk about the rest later,” she says decisively. “Let’s get the rest of your clothes off so I can eat you out.”

Yeji nods, almost frantically. “Yes, please.” 

Ryujin smiles and helps her out of her shirt, then goes to work on her pants while Yeji unclasps her bra. Ryujin’s tiny tank top goes next, and Yeji watches, rapt, as her bra falls away, too, and they’re both left in just their underwear. 

Yeji’s seen plenty of tits before—she works in a club, she’s seen it all—but it's never really occurred to her that she likes tits, until now. Ryujin leans in, pressing a kiss to Yeji’s sternum, and Yeji brings a hand up to cup one of them, running her thumb over Ryujin’s nipple and nearly giggling when a tremor passes through her body. 

“What was that about never being with a woman before?” Ryujin says, half amusement, half something else. “You seem to know exactly what you’re doing.”

Yeji does it again, flicks her thumb back and forth a couple times. “I’m just doing what I know I like,” she says softly, and Ryujin closes her mouth around one of Yeji’s nipples in response, tongue quick and skilled and so good. Yeji gasps, pleasure flooding her body. She can’t wait to find out how that’s going to feel against her clit. 

It seems like Ryujin is thinking the same thing. After a few seconds, she pulls off, sitting back on her heels and out of Yeji’s reach. “More time for that later,” she says when Yeji pouts. “I want to eat you out first.”

“Okay,” Yeji agrees breathlessly. “Yeah, okay.”

“Scoot down a little,” Ryujin says. “Get comfortable.”

Yeji slides down the bed just enough that she ends up half-reclined against Ryujin’s pillows. Ryujin gets situated between her legs, running her hands down the tops of her thighs and leaving goosebumps scattering across Yeji’s skin in their wake. And then she reaches out and finally touches Yeji, palm overturned and fingers gentle, brushing over the fabric of Yeji’s panties.

“You’re so wet already, babygirl,” Ryujin comments, almost offhand. “Already soaked through your panties.”

“Your fault,” Yeji accuses, and Ryujin just laughs.

“Let’s call it a team effort, hm?” She doesn’t need an answer; she hooks her index fingers on the waistband of Yeji’s underwear and pulls them down. Yeji extracts her legs, giggling when Ryujin chucks them over her shoulder. “That’s better. Ready?” She looks up, finds Yeji’s eyes. Yeji nods.

Ryujin slings one of Yeji’s thighs over her shoulder and bends over. Yeji has about a half a second to admire the contours of her back before she can’t think at all, because Ryujin’s tongue is against her clit. She moves it in circles, almost teasing, and then goes in with rough back-and-forth movements. She hardly gives Yeji a chance to adjust, picking up the pace, pressing her face closer. 

Yeji’s mouth has dropped open into a silent scream. She shakes, hands whispering across the sheets, trying and failing to find purchase there, something to anchor her. “Mommy,” she gasps, and Ryujin only hums. 

Yeji has been eaten out before. But never this well, this quickly. Maybe it’s Ryujin’s age, or maybe it’s that she’s a woman, too, but there’s hardly a learning curve for her. Yeji almost feels embarrassed. She knows she won’t be nearly as good, and she considers apologizing right now. But she can’t, because she can hardly form words. Ryujin slips a finger in her—easy now that she’s practically dripping onto her sheets—and Yeji moans, letting her head loll to the side.

“Mommy,” she whimpers. “More.”

Ryujin doesn’t respond, just adds a second finger and works them in and out of Yeji tirelessly, curling them up as she pulls them out to press against the spot inside her that makes her legs shake. Yeji alternates between rolling her hips up to meet her and trying to squirm away. It’s almost too much, but she wants more, and she realizes that it’s because she’s close already. 

She can feel the heat of Ryujin’s breath against her entrance. It’s almost reassuring—at least it’s hard work for Ryujin to make her feel like this. If it were easy, Yeji thinks she’d probably die of embarrassment.

But only after she comes, because everything feels so fucking good, and in the back of her mind, she finds herself almost remorseful. Why had she let herself suffer without sex this good for so many years? The answer, she knows, is just that she didn’t know it was possible to feel like this. It’s not that her past partners had left her unsatisfied, but she has a feeling that this is going to all but ruin her for everyone else. 

“Feels so good,” she stutters. “Oh, fuck, Ryujin, mommy, I-I’m close.”

Ryujin raises her head as she adds a third finger. Her lips and chin are slick, glistening with Yeji, and her eyes are bright and happy. “Good, baby?” she asks. Yeji hardly hears her, thinks maybe she manages a nod. The next thing she feels is pain, sharp enough to make her gasp. Ryujin has struck the back of one of her thighs. “I asked you a question.”

Yeji moans, high and broken. “Y-yes, it’s good,” she says. Ryujin doesn’t slow her fingers once; actually, Yeji’s pretty sure she’s sped up. 

“Feeling okay?” Ryujin’s voice is the same, but Yeji registers something softer underneath. “Can you give me a color?”

“Green,” Yeji replies immediately. “Please, mommy, hit me again.” There’s a small part of her that balks at the words—she never imagined she’d beg to be hurt. But, then again, it’s different with women. She can trust Ryujin. She’s safe here. “Make me come.”

“Of course, baby,” Ryujin says, tone almost indulgent. She dips her head again, and it takes everything in Yeji not to buck her hips up to meet Ryujin’s mouth. Ryujin hollows her cheeks a little, sucking as she swipes her tongue, back and forth and then around and around, fingers still pumping, other Han soothing over the spot where she struck here, where the tingles of pain are rapidly fading. 

Yeji barely realizes Ryujin’s raised her hand before she strikes her again, the pain blooming hot and sweet across her skin. Yeji lets out a shaky moan, and Ryujin hums against her clit and then Yeji is coming, one hand flying to the back of Ryujin’s head, holding her in place as her whole body goes tight. She convulses around Ryujin’s fingers, gasping out whimpers that sound something like mommy, mommy please, and Ryujin doesn’t stop. Yeji’s heart is pounding, her head; pleasure sweeps her whole body in staggering wave after staggering wave. She feels it washing down her legs to her fucking toes, her fingertips, followed by near numbness as Ryujin finally relents, pulling away and crawling up the bed to lavish Yeji with attention.

She feels lips brushing her own and kisses back blindly. Ryujin pushes her tongue past Yeji’s teeth, and Yeji can taste herself. Another tremor runs through her body, and even though she’s still going through the aftershocks of her orgasm, she thinks she could maybe come again. Ryujin hums softly into her mouth, clean hand coming up to stroke her cheek as she pulls back.

“Look at me, baby,” Ryujin whispers. Yeji blinks her eyes open shyly, and finds Ryujin staring back. “Did so good for me,” she murmurs and Yeji preens, fluttering her eyelashes and letting out a soft giggle.

“I don’t think I’ve come that hard in my life,” she admits, and Ryujin chuckles.

“Good,” she says. “Can’t have anybody else making you feel like I do.” She raises her other hand, fingers glistening in the low light. “Help me clean up?”

Yeji leans forward, parting her lips and letting her tongue poke out a little in response. Ryujin smiles, offering her her ring and pinky fingers, dipping her head to take her index and middle fingers herself. Yeji pushes her tongue between the two fingers, licking them clean. Her forehead brushes against Ryujin’s, and when they both pull off, they’re laughing softly. Yeji follows Ryujin with her eyes, rapt, tracing over her smile lines, as Ryujin wipes their spit off on her thigh.

Ryujin brushes some of Yeji’s hair off her forehead with her other hand. “I like when you look at me like that,” she says.

Yeji leans into the touch, not breaking eye contact. “Like what?” she asks.

“Like you have stars in your eyes,” Ryujin says, smiling.

Yeji smiles, too. “I can’t help it,” she says truthfully. She sits up a little straighter, leaning into Ryujin’s space to steal another kiss. “Okay,” she says. “Your turn now. But you’re gonna have to help me.”

Ryujin exhales soft laughter. “Okay,” she replies. “What do you want, baby? You wanna eat me out too?” She tips her head just a little. “You don’t have to.”

Yeji rolls her eyes. “Are you nuts?” she asks. “Yes, I wanna eat you out.”

“Okay, let me see something,” Ryujin says. “Stick your tongue out.” Yeji obeys. “You can go around in circles, right?” Yeji nods, demonstrating, feeling a pleased flush rise to her cheeks when Ryujin’s eyes darken. “Good girl. How ‘bout side to side?” Ryujin demonstrates, sticking her own tongue out and wiggling it back and forth in a perfect line. Yeji hesitates, then tries it too, going slow at first but picking up speed once she gets the hang of it. Ryujin grins. “So talented,” she teases, and Yeji giggles. “Try it like that, like I did with you. Switch it up a little. I’ll tell you if you need to change anything.”

They switch places carefully. There’s something so purposeful about it; one action doesn’t naturally flow into the next, and Yeji used to think that might be kind of unsexy. But she appreciates now that they’re taking it slow, that Ryujin is giving her time to set herself up. Besides, there’s something to be said about being deliberate, about choosing.

Ryujin lies back against her pillows, letting her legs drop open. “Let’s see what you can do, pretty girl,” she murmurs, and Yeji feels something flare in her, a drive to be good, a drive to prove herself.

She bends over Ryujin’s body, pausing to kiss her stomach, first between her ribs and then at the seat of it, the pretty curved line where her belly meets her hips, then lower. She hesitates for a split second, then pushes on. The last thing she sees before she gets too close is pink and pink and pink, dusky and pretty and enticing. Yeji’s nerves slip away. She knows what to do, mostly, and where she doesn’t, Ryujin will help her.

Yeji can smell her, the wet heat of it. It’s earthy and a little sharp, different from Yeji, different from anything she knows. It might be a little gross of her, but it smells good. The short hairs tickle against Yeji’s nose and upper lip as she opens her mouth and presses her tongue against Ryujin’s clit. She takes Ryujin’s hips in her hands to hold herself upright, then circles her tongue around her clit, long, slow movements, building up to an easy rhythm and giving herself a chance to adjust. There’s not much to adjust to, though. She’s not choking on anything, and she doesn’t have to be so careful with her teeth. Sucking dick has its merits to be sure, but this—Yeji pushes her face closer, switching to the side-to-side movements Ryujin just taught her, and is rewarded with a breathy moan.

She raises her gaze and finds Ryujin watching through half-lidded eyes, head lolled to the side. “That’s it, baby,” Ryujin says when she sees Yeji looking. “So good. You’re a natural.” There’s a hint of humor nestled there in the desire, and Yeji smiles against Ryujin’s pussy, swiping her tongue faster. She tastes mild, a little salty, a little bitter, and Yeji makes a mental note to ask Ryujin if she can tongue-fuck her next time so she can have more. 

One of Ryujin’s hands comes down to cup the base of her skull. Yeji hums softly, delighted to find it sends shivers through Ryujin’s whole body.

“Don’t even need me to help you,” Ryujin says lowly. “Doing so good. You can go a little slower. Think you can give me one of your fingers, baby? Want you inside.”

Yeji scrambles to obey, planting one hand on the mattress to stabilize herself and fitting her other arm under her body so she can work a finger into Ryujin. This, too, comes easy; she knows what feels good, what doesn’t. Ryujin is so wet, dripping down her knuckles as she begins to move her finger in and out, slow and stuttering as she tries to keep up with her tongue, too. It takes a few minutes of awkward, jerky movements, but Ryujin is patient, murmuring praise. Yeji doesn’t back down, determined to find the right rhythm, and eventually she does, tongue pushed flat and wiggling side to side against Ryujin’’s swollen clit as she pumps her finger in and out. She’s glad she’s not wearing nails, that she clipped them just yesterday and filed them down to let them recover, glad there’s nothing stopping her from giving Ryujin everything.

As Ryujin gets louder, Yeji gets bolder, scraping gently with her teeth to see what will happen. Ryujin moans, nails digging into Yeji’s scalp. “Who taught you that, baby?” Ryujin asks. “Fuck, do it again for me.” Yeji obeys, staying gentle, warmth settling over her body and gathering in her belly when Ryujin shakes.

She adds a second finger, and she’s able to get deeper like this, curling her fingers up and moaning again Ryujin’s clit when Ryujin rolls her hips up to meet her, when she groans low and gravelly in the back of her throat and says, “There, right there, baby.” Yeji’s tongue is getting sore, her lips puffy and probably bruised, her chin covered with seat and spit and Ryujin, her fingers tiring, but she keeps going because Ryujin sounds so good, tastes so good, feels so good. She thinks she could do this forever, maybe, face buried between Ryujin’s thighs, Ryujin’s moans filling the air, Ryujin clenching tight around her fingers, pulling her in.

“Fuck, oh fuck,” Ryujin gasps, and then Yeji feels her pulsing around her fingers as she arches off the bed, bumping Yeji’s nose almost painfully. Yeji doesn’t care, does her best to move with her, keeps circling her tongue and moving her fingers as best she can as Ryujin comes with a moan. Yeji thinks dizzily that maybe it’s the best thing she’s ever heard. She thinks she’s gonna remember it forever, the sound playing and replaying in her mind whenever she gets off next.

After a little while, Ryujin stills and pushes her away, gentle but firm. “Okay, okay,” she gasps and Yeji raises her head, drawing in a huge breath. She realizes now how tired she is, how her body aches, how tight her lungs.

“Was it good, mommy?” she asks breathlessly, crawling to the side and then scooting up towards the pillows.

Ryujin nods, giving her a lazy, satisfied smile. “Yes, baby,” she says, and her voice is all sugar. “You did very good. C’mere.” She holds out her arms and Yeji goes happily, nestling close. “Kiss me.” And Yeji does, pressing her lips to Ryujin’s, kissing her softly, letting her eyes fall shut, letting Ryujin wrap her up in her arms until she’s surrounded, until the whole world is just Ryujin and her lips and her taste and her soft, soft skin. 

They break apart after a few moments and just lay there, breathing. Yeji rests her head on Ryujin’s shoulder. She wonders what time it is. Maybe the sun is already on the rise. Maybe it’s been hours. She’s not sure, but she doesn’t care. She could stay here forever, she thinks. She would stay, if Ryujin asked.

“Doing okay?” Ryujin asks finally.

Yeji giggles a little deliriously. It feels like such a silly question. “God, yeah,” she says. “I had fun. Is that weird? I had so much fun, I didn’t know it could be so fun.”

Ryujin laughs, too, the delight rich and clear. “Good,” she says. “I’m glad. I had fun, too.”

They lay together a few minutes more, pressing soft kisses to each other’s palms and letting their laughter ebb away. At last, Ryujin drags them both from the bed. Together they pull the sheets off, throwing them in a heap with their clothes, and then head to the bathroom for a shower. Ryujin has earthy-scented body wash, and Yeji tries to hide how pleased she is to share, happy that the smell will linger on her skin tomorrow, a secret reminder.

Yeji has a few spare pairs of clean underwear in her bag, so she pulls on a pair once they’re both dry, then goes to Ryujin for a shirt. Ryujin has her top drawer open, picking out a pair for herself, and Yeji’s eyes land on a row of dildos in the back, along with a harness.

“You own a strap?” she gasps, swatting Ryujin’s arm. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Didn’t want to scare you,” Ryujin replies, plucking up a pair of underwear and pushing the drawer shut.

“Next time?” Yeji all but demands, pouting. “Want you to fuck me, mommy.”

“God, you’re insatiable,” Ryujin accuses, but she’s grinning. She leans in and kisses Yeji’s forehead. “Yes,” she adds. “Next time.”

They get sleep shirts, then put on fresh sheets together, fluffing the pillows, and climb into bed. Yeji yawns widely, and Ryujin covers her mouth for her, laughing as they both settle down against the pillows.

Yeji curls closer, slotting one of her legs between Ryujin’s. Ryujin runs a hand down her back, touch warm and reassuring, eyes on Yeji, watching her. Yeji blinks back, some joyous feeling bubbling up in her chest. She’s never felt so wanted. She’s never felt so safe.

“G’night,” she whispers.

“It’s already seven a.m.,” Ryujin whispers back.

“Oops,” Yeji says softly, closing her eyes, and Ryujin laughs. The sound washes her into sleep, Ryujin’s hand is still warm on Yeji’s back.

#works #itzy #ryeji #yeji #ryujin #ryeji fanfic #ryeji fanfiction #ryeji smut #shin ryujin #hwang yeji #yeji fanfic #yeji fanfiction #yeji smut #ryujin fanfic #ryujin fanfiction #ryujin smut #itzy fanfic #itzy smut #itzy fanfiction #itzy yeji #itzy ryujin #itzy yeji smut #itzy ryujin smut #itzy yeji fanfiction #itzy ryujin fanfiction #yeji x ryujin #ryujin x yeji #yeji x ryujin fanfic #yeji x ryujin fanfiction #yeji x ryujin smut

[bleachbleachbleach]

Hi! I don't know whether you're interested with the topic I'm about to discuss, it's about the relationship between Kyouraku and Nanao. Lol. All we know until the end of TYBW is Kyoraku and Nanao are officially revealed as uncle and niece. Only to that point, no more no less. But yesterday I scrolled over Instagram and found somebody commented in a post about Kyoraku, asking 'Kyoraku and Nanao are married right?'. Of course, people are denying it (some even said he's married to his zanpakutou lol). Later, there's this one guy went 'YES THEY'RE CANONICALLY MARRIED AND YOU PEOPLE JUST DON'T ADMIT IT'. Then he got himself explaining about the moment in chapter 651 (when Nanao asked Kyoraku to gave her sword back, when she said something about 'The man I adore will laugh at the curse'), there's a kanji word on that scene that defining Nanao's love confession to Kyoraku that leading into their marriage (sorry I forgot which word, but it's on the exact scene I wrote before). At first I was certainly sure this guy most likely misinterpreted the situation. But later on, I asked myself, what if I'm the one who didn't understand what I read? What if they're actually married and I didn't realize it. Idk, but if it's true I feel like it somehow ruin the atmosphere of the story (plus I'm sure both of them never thought about marrying each other because WHY SHOULD I MARRY MY OWN UNCLE/NIECE??). That's why I wanna ask for your opinion since you're indeed a thorough reader of Bleach, are they indeed married? Or is there any indication they cross the path and begin as husband and wife? I'm sure none of us wanted it, imagine marrying our own uncle lol. Your analysis lighten up my soul as a die-hard fan of Bleach who loved to contemplating every simple detail of the story lol. Thanks before!

I’ll begin by admitting that I am not someone who is bothered by fictional cartoon ghost incest, so if Kyouraku and Nanao want to be married, sure, go be married! I’m 1000% certain weirder marriages have and will continue to happen in the Seireitei. But the part about this conversation that’s interesting to me is—

Well, let’s start from the beginning!

"Marriage" is on the table here as a thematic concept because of the Ise Curse, wherein Ise women marry men, and the men always die (and their children are always women). Nanao’s mom tried to cheat the system by marrying out of the Ise Clan and into the Kyouraku Clan, but her husband still died anyway.

Nanao’s line isn’t inherently about marriage—she uses the phrase お慕いする人 (oshitaisuru hito). お慕い (oshitai) is an honorific way of expressing admiration/respect/adoration/pining. But, especially with those last two, you can see the valid potential to read the line romantically. However, it can also be used in reference to a grandparent, a teacher, or other non-romantic partners for whom you feel deep admiration.

Bleach 651

Given that the context is Nanao’s mother’s love life, and a curse that governs the love lives (and/or marriages) of Ise women, I think it’s reasonable to read that context into Nanao’s line, as well as into Kyouraku’s response (a small but witting smile), and to understand this exchange as romantic.

She's definitely talking about Kyouraku to Kyouraku here. But is she talking SOLELY about Kyouraku, or is she also referencing some future hypothetical man? I think that’s more open to interpretation.

As far as her message to Kyouraku, I’d personally read it less as a confession of love than as an assertion of agency. This is the part love so much about this scene: She and Kyouraku are losing this fight. Soul Society is losing this war. They’re probably all gonna die and it’s all beginning to feel a little preordained, a little like just deserts, a little like past romances being crushed by a cruel and inescapable family curse. For Nanao to say this now, in this moment, is to ask Kyouraku to stop protecting her and to let her join this fight―no matter the odds, no matter the sense of inevitable and pre-governed fates. Because the Kyouraku SHE knows doesn’t take shit from "fate"! He laughs at such things, and he believes, in the deepest core of his being, in a mutable world. This is what Nanao loves and admires about him. 

She reminds him of this, and he smiles. They did not come here to die at the hands of the Wandenreich, or to fall to punishments meted out for crimes that are and are not theirs. If they have crimes to answer for, the answer is not death. There’s other work that must be done, on the other side of this. If Kyouraku can believe that about the Ise Curse (and Nanao's future love life with this future hypothetical man) and give Nanao her sword, then he can believe that about this Thousand-Year Blood War.

Can that faith and devotion also be read romantically? Yeah, sure go for it. Can it be read entirely platonically? I’d say yes, that too!

Personally, I think Nanao probably dodges the Ise Curse by being Extremely Lesbian, but whatever she ends up doing I’m pretty sure it involves a lot of sex and even more forms of love than that amount of sex that don’t have anything to do with sex OR romance. But that’s all beyond the purview of this scene. XD

#thank you for the ask! #uhhhh two months ago but again i promise our tardiness is not for lack of interest! just stress and time #but my shame at how tardy these are is greater than my stress about the work i should be doing rn lol #kyouraku shunsui #ise nanao #bleach tybw #bleach manga #bleach カラー #bleach meta #no brain just bleach #asks

[teutaranaway]

you aren’t being annoying at all don’t worry!! i’m glad you’re having fun ^_^ you’re one of the mutuals that makes me consider making my own selfship blog tbh!

i thought the route was good! it’s a bit sad to hear that crow isn’t taken seriously in other routes since his character goes way deeper than what’s touched on in the first few chapters. but i thought the piano scene was sooooo cutes <3

it’s funny that you mention thinking he’s the best with teuta as a character, because i didn’t realize that the personality quiz thingy was tied to the routes at first and just answered how i thought she would answer based on canon personality traits haha

AHHH im planning on making my own selfship blog too !!!!

this is a bit long uh oh

although he contributes a lot to the story in other routes hes mostly there to be funny + be a punchline, which is like. you kinda learn that hes doing that on purpose after u played his route anyway (like he talks about how he wants to be seen as goofy funny and have people love him that way bc he doesnt think they would love him if he wasnt funny, didnt have a lot of money, wasnt contributing to the team with his smarts etc. he basically thinks he wont be loved if hes not the butt monkey or is useful somehow) AMD THE PIANO SCENE IS SO SO SO CUTE I HAD IT AS MY WALLPAPER FOR A STRAIGHT YEAR my favorite type of romance in fiction is one that just happens naturally and i think that scene captured it perfectly AND he was so cute there AND he got to be vulnerable with teuta about his dad playing that for him (and later on him getting even more vulnerable with her too UGHHH PUNCHES THE SCREEN)

also yea the personality test + the swimsuit scene + the cat naming scene are the ones where they lock you on an LI's route but when i said that i meant that. ive played all of the routes and i personally believe teucrow to be the healthiest relationship in the game bc of their capability to be vulnerable and understanding with each other, and even tho crow is really emotionally immature hes trying so hard with her so i feel like if there were smth that would go wrong with their relationship then they would put actual effort to fix it

i like teumozu too but obviously its second place + i like teuhelv friendship a lot but not as a couple + i feel like the power imbalance in limbo and shu's routes really made teuta ooc bc its established in the common route that shes this hot headed argumentative woman but with them its like her role has become smaller. and to nurture these two basically . like that one post that was going on thats like making fun of "big guy x nurturing woman" i see it as like that basically. teutas argumentative personality while would make teulimbo friendship very fun i find it really hard to actually see them romantically, and i HATE HATE HATE teuta with shu romantically and i barely see them as friends bc shu makes it so hard to actually like him (which is like. his nature but anyway). shu on his own is fine and when hes interacting with the team as a whole hes really fun, he has some really good #brothers moments with crow that i love and i love his relationship with [SPOILERS!!!!] but i dont really enjoy him as a character. i feel like hes only popular bc hes a bad boy headhunter and he has the dorito body

UM. YEAH ❤️

#ask #anon

[raayllum]

Yes, please, write the rayllum aspec meta. Aspec rayllum is one of my favorite head canons.

Will happily do so as it's one of my favourite headcanons. I'm also going to be talking about TDP and how it does romance in general in a way that I think is very refreshing and consistent, which is to say:

TDP Doesn't Rely on Blushing, And It Does Wonders

Now, I love blushing in my fiction as much as the next person. I am very fond of those pink circles or six italicized vaguely squiggly lines. It can be cute, adorable, and downright exciting. I’m also not saying that blushing and aspec people are like, exclusive — we can and do blush! So can aspec characters.

However, what I am saying is that blushing is one of the most prominent signs of feelings — physical feelings — characters will display towards each other. Yet until 3x02, Rayla and Callum never blush at each other, but many of us aw their romance coming well ahead of time (for reasons unrelated to “lead boy lead girl” trope, thank you very much). 

Also fun fact: originally this was going to be longer and I was going to talk more about Callum/Claudia as well as Janai/Amaya, so for once, I am actually shortening a meta response rather than lengthening it (although I’m sure this’ll also be plenty long). Mostly because I realized I’d rather focus on just Rayllum, as I have many thoughts on how this works for the other two couples, but not enough interest (at least right now) to write it down. So here we go!

However, we are still going to touch on Callum and Claudia when it comes to Callum’s body language, so they will factor in. After all, Callum’s crush on Claudia is made clear in her introduction scene — staring, smiling at her, wanting to impress her. Soren provides context clues as well. But even then, blushing isn’t a large part of their relationship. In 1x02, they share one of only two (2) blushing scenes the pairing has, both on Callum’s behalf.

We see this continued theme when Claudia and Callum cross paths again at the Moon Nexus. Callum is nervous and staring and even hyperventilating, wanting to impress her, holding hands, etc. But he never blushes. His flustered nature is shown in other ways, mostly in nervous gestures with his hands, like twisting his bag strap or even clasping his hands together.

There was also other body language, like rubbing the back of his head (in 1x02), gesturing to himself and pointing (2x02 both about Claudia and to Claudia about Rayla), etc. Obviously there are the big parallels, like Callum drawing both of them and seeing Rayla’s drawing in 2x07, the way Callum ultimately chooses to trust Rayla over Claudia, twice (1x03, 2x03), seeking out comfort from Rayla when he’s grieving on screen > Claudia (which either happened off screen or didn’t happen at all). 

However, the main thing the lack of blushing between TDP couples in general allows for there to be ambiguous feelings. Blushing can be an indication or confirmation, but we know Callum clearly likes Claudia in 2x02 even if he doesn’t blush at her at all in the episode and even if we (the casual viewer) doesn’t remember he even blushed at her in almost a season ago. 

What this does is give space for the audience to read between the lines and infer their own meaning onto more scnees. It’s why even two seasons (and three years later) Claudia’s ‘feelings’ for Callum in S2 still feel ambiguous. She certainly likes spending time with him and cares about him, but that doesn’t automatically translate into romantic affection. We can make an argument for her feelings for Callum (tucking away her hair, rubbing the side of her neck, enjoying his moon-eyed gazes and attention) but it’s also very easy, due to her lack of vested reciprocity, to dismiss those feelings as friendship and partial manipulation. 

But what does any of this have to do with aspec Rayllum? Well: Rayla almost confesses her love for Callum in 2x09, without ever blushing at him once, and with still almost two whole episodes to go before she’s going to blush in front of him in general. 

Think of this way — and spoilers for the comparison show / warning for personal preference regarding Luz and Amity from “The Owl House.” The first hints of feelings are on Amity’s side with blushing. There’s more than a few episodes where Amity, and only Amity, regularly blushes around Luz even outside of other flustered behaviour. Luz blushes at a couple of people before hand, but never around Amity until in very early S2.

Thus, the show convinces me that Luz catches feelings for Amity in early S2 — but no sooner, and certainly that Amity had an actual crush for far longer. Yes, Luz worked to befriend Amity, and enjoyed her company, but the wiggle room the show had to indicate Luz catching feelings any earlier feels moot because well — the show does rely on blushing to indicate romantic feelings, and Luz never blushed around her for multiple episodes. Amity has been blushing since episode 12/19, so almost 8 episodes go by with no reciprocal feelings indicated. And it works — it’s not a flaw, and I say be blatant with your queer rep, especially now that we can! — but it is a very different vibe.

All of this being a very long winded way to say that because TDP doesn’t rely on blushing for romantic feelings, it’s very easy to read romantic feelings and interest into Rayllum’s earlier scenes — and we know Rayla, at the very least, is catching strong feelings all through S2. This development is more subtle but definitely consistent on both sides, and I think it’s why so few people found the love confession out of left field in 2x09, because they’d been picking up (largely unprompted) on those vibes for a while now. 

If the show did rely on blushing, their dynamic would look very different. For starters, rather than a gradual (i.e subtle) buildup to those feelings, it would feel very fast very quickly (if Rayla had been blushing since 2x04, for example, or even sooner). Even though Callum is clearly also catching feelings in S1 and S2, leaving blushing out means that his Romantic feelings for Rayla don’t get factored in as an aspect of his decision of who to trust in 2x03, even if his overall bond with Rayla, does.

Which also plays into how the lack of blushing allows for Callum and Rayla to have sometimes flirty vibes, yes, but it also allows for their bond to feel deeper than Crush feelings. It gives them a strong platonic basis that would lend well to romance instead of a “I like you but we’re just friends for a while first” plot arc that many friends-to-lovers plotlines get handed. (Which I also like, but doesn’t give as much of an aspec vibe, y’know?) 

It also lends itself well to a slightly less physical vibe, particularly for Rayla, which also just encourages the demisexual headcanon I and many other aspec people have for her. After all, she falls head over heels for Callum without ever once being flustered or blushing around him (as that only happens when her confession gets interrupted). Yes, she’s touchy-feely with him and thinks he’s very cute/handsome, but she falls for him mostly because he’s sweet and brave and always gets back up again every time he fails. 

Her calling him her best friend is treated with the same swelling music, importance, and framing as either of their first kisses. She also still blushes less than Callum does, too (she has two, Callum has three). But at the same time, I think both Callum and Rayla blushing at each other is important for their relationship, particularly on Callum’s side. Now, his blushing operates as confirmation / reaffirmation of his feelings, as they were mostly heavily hinted until that point from 2x07 through to 3x01 (arguably starting in earnest in 2x04). 

But again, we know he’s been admiring and interested in Rayla for a while now. He thinks she’s awesome, he’s worrying about her, taking care of her, hugging her and grabbing her hand even when he doesn’t need to, choosing her over Claudia, etc. And again, none of this has to be read as romantic, but that flexible interpretation means that, just as he says in 3x04, he doesn’t think or do those things because he’s pursuing her or because he Likes her. He likes her because of all those things, and thinks just as highly of her regardless of whether or not she likes him back (see: Callum’s feelings in 3x04). 

However, I think Rayla blushing is more important to their romance arc than him blushing, which is to say: if the crew had wanted Claudia to blush at Callum at any point in their relationship, she would have. But Claudia’s feelings are purposefully more ambiguous, as we’ve touched on, and she definitely has less of them than Callum does. And one of the best narrative things about Rayllum is that Rayla’s feelings for Callum are even more intense than his for Claudia, and Claudia’s for him; she pursues and courts and kisses Callum, blushes around him and gets flustered, too. They have an equal interest in each other, and it does wonders.

TLDR;

By not relying on blushing as a way to show romantic feelings, the show creates a state of Alterousness / Ambiguity of both overlapping platonic and romantic affection for Rayla and Callum to exist in. Their affection is then primarily built on emotional intimacy and physical gestures of reassurance (hugs, shoulder touches, hands, etc.) as well as a certain amount of maturity. They may be teenagers, but theirs is not a high school romance built on infatuation or a lack of self and emotional awareness of themselves, each other, and the world. Even when one blushes (i.e. 3x03) the other may not, perpetuating this Alterous / Friendship first even throughout their more overt romantic development. All of this allows for the ship to feel as though it is built strongly on a foundation of friendship above all else, lending itself well to aspec headcanons and subsequently creating an aspec heavy shipping community. 

And I love it very very much.

#rayllum #tdp #the dragon prince #callum x claudia #parallels #tdp meta #analysis series #aspec rayllum #thanks for asking #anonymous #requests

[thebirdofthechapel]

I felt a little bothered over a particular discourse of aroace Saiki; how he can’t be interested in Teruhashi and that aroaces can’t be in relationships… I’ve always known that existed in the Saiki K fandom and have avoided it until that one time. It’s fine to look for representation in fictional characters, but sexual identity is a journey of self-discovery. Boxing people into one experience is damaging to the concept of the diversity we queer people stand for. It isn’t “Saiki is straight or aroace” but “Saiki is aroace or maybe he’s gay in varying ways” - at the very least, that was what I was trying to say in the context of the discourse. I get we’re starved of representation, but it’s very weird that people become obsessed over the sexual identities of fictional characters... In anime, no less. The worst place to expect any representation.

But what bothers me the most was how, for all their claim of aroace erasure in the show, is how they themselves are doing it by believing there is only one type of aroace exp. Being aroace doesn’t necessarily mean you hate romance or/and sex. There are those that don’t want partners. There are those that do. There are those willing to do things for their partner if it makes them happy, and there are those that don’t. They’re all valid.  Aro/ace folks have different preferences as well. 

And they said no one comes close to Saiki as an aroace icon and I’m like....there’s Mera? She’s the true aroace icon!

This is why I never talked about pairings in RoH. For a coming-of-age story, I want the characters to grow and learn about themselves. I sort of have vague ideas for them but I’m mostly leaving it up to air and seeing where it goes. So far, there have been mentions of boys liking girls - Ritsu’s claim that he prefers energetic girls, swapped!Saiki having a puppy crush on Tsubomi back when they were kids, Momozou being obviously into Hitomi - but in case it isn’t clear, the setting has a very heteronormative culture. Having pink hair has already made things tricky for the Kageyama brothers. I avoid using “X is Y identity” to advertise this fic but LGBTQ+ themes are definitely a big part of what can be expected.

Well, I guess I can say there are definitely more gays than straights haha. Everyone being a lil gay is more believable, honestly.

#Saiki Kusuo no PSI Nan #the disastrous life of saiki k. #saiki k #saiki no psi nan #saiki kusuo #teruhashi kokomi #mera chisato #no ototo no ani #roh #tbotc posts