#: to the extent that you naturally would

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Question about Lights Out, and you don't have to answer if it holds spoilers ofc! But does anyone else know Frank is slowly dying? Or is he just kinda dealing with the whole thing on his own?? (I'm gonna eat up any angst you throw at me-)

well, of course Wally and Home know. i mean, all three of them are dying - technically everyone is - Frank's just going faster. and i have an idea that when the others start waking up, Frank makes Wally agree to stay hush-hush on the matter as to not Freak Anyone Out... that will backfire!

#wally knows from the start but im not sure how i want others to find out.... #i mean its going to become Obvious that something is very wrong with him #(and to a slightly lesser extent - wally & home) #one option is eddie overhears wally and frank talking about it #and is like 'wait what do you mean youre Fuckign Dying-' #or they all just figure it out #i dont frank to just randomly keel over #theyre gonna know ahead of time. theyre gonna have some Warning. #im not gonna blindside anyone like that.... #it takes away emotional impact! #knowing its coming is Infinitely more painful and emotional than it happening suddenly! #frank is haunting the narrative before he even dies! he's already a ghost! #rambles from the bog #wh lights out au #theres a uh... Mechanic to how and why everyone is slowly dying #why frank dies after only a few years while wally survives decades #why the others aren't quite in as much immediate 'natural' danger #and why home would be the last to go had things not changed #it has to do with the Pit and it has to do with the Goop™️

[soph-skies]

i think one of the reasons i’m so drawn to xue yang (besides Hot. and Vaguely Evil) is that every time i see him i’m staring at an alternate universe wei wuxian. he and wwx are absolutely each other’s ‘what could have been’ and watching them interact is so fascinating

#you can so clearly see how despite beginning in the same situation their paths diverged so early on in life #and then we get into the nurture vs nature debate #i’m willing to argue a bit of both here #wwx is so fundamentally justice oriented and we see what lengths he will go to to defend that #literally with his life #i don’t think you could ever change that but i do think the (limited) care of the jiangs certainly shaped him #xue yang seems so fundamentally drawn to cruelty #but it’s hard to see where the pain of abandonment and thirst for revenge separates from his nature #i think he would have always been interested in cruelty i think that aspect of him cannot be changed #if he just wanted revenge he would have stopped at harming those who abandoned him #yet he continued to extremes and murdered entire clans seemingly for fun #i would argue even if he had a loving upbringing that innate cruelty would have still manifested itself somehow #HOWEVER #xue yang with a loving upbringing is still harmful but certainly not to the extent he is without it #i see that version of him as a more twisted wwx type who is into experimentation but ultimately is drawn back to society by his loved ones #they are so fundamentally opposed in their values #and yet on some level they are both that scared abandoned child #mdzs #the untamed #cql #wei wuxian #wei ying #wwx #xue yang #xy #cql meta #the untamed meta #i love 2 am philosophy

[milfygerard]

to this day the perfect transition, both musically and thematically, from drugstore perfume to get the gang together on hesalien makes me insane. Its like one long story, the loneliness and dysphoria and boredom that comes with being a teen trapped in their hometown with no escape and no prospects and then flash forwarding to your 20 year high school reunion after you ran away and found some sort of happiness and seeing how the people and the place have has only festered and rotted the connections you did feel you had, revealing itself as somewhere that was never very kind or safe for you. It's closure on that nostalgia that grows as you get older, a stark reminder that you were right to leave, and just because you miss something doesn't mean you should go back to it

#barry.txt #ppl swore for years gtgt was an mcr song but its definitely not #mcrs breakup caused a lot of this introspection and looking back but i think people just saw the title and wanted it to be about mcr #im not the first person to say this im just like #aughhhh hesitant alien you are my every thing #like the pointed transphobia from the characters in gtgt is a natural extention of the examining gerard was doing surrounding their gender- #identity and expression and probably a lot of the actual stuff they would hear from people around them esp if they were reconnecting w old- #-friends which can be...painful #i remember gerard defending this writing choice on twitter bc it was 2014 and people did Not get it #aughhh. i #aughhhhhhhh #hesitant alien the woman you are #its also a sequel to the 10 year reunion of kill all your friends gtgt and kill all ur friends are literally the same song

[strangerpsychofficeparks]

Oh I forgot to mention both also rely on twerking as a source of humor because that's what the kids think is funny these days, right?

#listen i know they're not the same level of bad. #as it is i would FAR rather watch she-hulk than velma as it at least tries to respect the nature and tone of its source material #whereas velma basically puts the original characters' names and outfits on unrecognizable garbage #but I'm just saying #i'm sick of shoddy one dimensional representation being used to cover up bad writing and selfish characters #if you liked she-hulk i am sorry #it isn't nearly as bad as velma from what i gather #but the girlbossification of velma and she-hulk #as though they weren't already strong female characters in the source material #is not something i personally find appealing #also i know jameela and mindy have different roles and extents of influence on these shows #i just thought both coming from nbc backgrounds and being involved in these projects was a strange coincidence #velma #scooby doo #scooby-doo #velma dinkley #mindy kaling #she hulk #anti disney #anti hbo max #anti hbo #hbo max #ps i am a woman so don't come at me saying my critique of she hulk is sexist or some bs like that #i WANT strong female and minority representation. #but this... is not that.

[gaytranszoro]

sorry okay im rewatching whole cake w a friend and got obsessed with the vinsmokes this time around okay. sorry. however i am a liker of themes and motifs and doomed characters. sorrey.

#i just looovvee the ways the different families this arc are portrayed. big moms as an empire to be expanded. #beges as a loyal bond and structured organization #and ofcourse the vinsmokes as an army bound only by blood and not by love. and a commodity to be used/force to be strengthened #like sure they're all related but like. they do not act like a family even in the slightest. they don't even seem to really like each other #LOL just even w the charlottes you get the feeling they care about each other to an extent (ie katakuri and brulee or chiffon and lola) #but we rarely see any of the vinsmokes hold a conversation with each other let alone act like siblings. #(unless you count them like. abusing sanji as sibling bonding) #which i why i OBSESSSS over when reiju gets hurt you see one of them call out in concern. #n the (admittedly anime only) scene of yonji like helping a little. bear guy get a fruit off a tree. that shit cute as hell. #you get these like. moments of humanity with them that seep through the cracks of the carefully-constructed image of the Evil Germa Army yk #the way all the siblings turned out and the ways they compliment and contrast each other makes me think ab what could have been you know. #iirc reiju wound up how she is because her mother encourgaged her emptions and instilled a sense of humanity in her. proving they are all #capable of having that sense of morality the others just...didnt get it 1) bc sora died when they were so young and #2) bc judge had a VICE GRIP on them. #so they were doomed from the start. #their father wanted a perfect unfeeling obedient army of soldiers and he was going to get it by any means necessary #even if said soldiers are supposed to be his children #i do think the vinsmokes are deeply unforgivable but i also recognize tht like...they were victims of circumstance. #smthn smthn nature vs nurture #in another life i think they would have kicked ass together #idk im fuuucked upp off the green tea rn yk how it goes..... #.txt #idk how to be coherent abt them they just make me feel like pacing around my room with my head in my hands #its been said better by ppl with better grasps on character analysis than me but. abuse victims who suck. and are also assholes. #you mean everything to meeee

[suncaptor]

there's something specifically inside my head that is closing up that makes trusting anything so hard. i have to manually keep my mind open to the potential of anything being significant. i am so used to things being bad and things hurting and things not working and being powerless that it takes an exorbitant amount of mental energy to make sure I don't let myself shut down possibility. and I do it because I never want a certainty inside of me besides love to rule anything. but I want my brain elastic again. i want it open like breathing. it doesn't erase the unfairness or the critique or any of the bitter-built philosophy.

#it's so hard to describe what I mean. i think it's the combo of the like. specific part of my brain's development + the amount of trauma #I have endured + the degree of which that has been taking place on a backdrop of the world being incredibly injust no matter what I do #this is very very silly but the extent of how much this impacts me was made clear by how like. closed off I was to even liking an album by #my favourite singer. like obviously I am obsessively keeping myself open I would never let my preconceived sense of doom and stubbornness #control my willingness to let things in #but it shouldn't be so hard to keep my mind open to things like... liking my favourite musician of most of my life's music........... #and that's a VERY silly example but that's why it's easier to talk about. it takes so much work to be open enough for things like therapy #or religion because they've damaged me so much #how am i supposed to handle this on a backdrop of constant constant helplessness in the face of living insecurity and illness and trauma? #the problem is if you try so so so hard again and again and remain hopeful regardless of how illogical that hope is #but you get let down so constantly since you're never stop trying ever even when systems fail you again and again #and you're watching horrible things happen and everything that shapes you is horror #then regardless of how much you try it's so hard to let yourself let go of the very realistic lived experience of doubt and critique #and I DO. do NOT get me wrong. I am obsessive and refuse to be my own problem #but the act of doing so shouldn't be like this. it's in everything i do. from simple things like listening to new music to even the mere #possibility of a future #i am very worried this one is going to be misinterpreted bc I AM NOT saying I'm stubborn in the face of systems that have repeatedly failed #me. I AM NOT. I am saying to not be shouldn't take this work when it envelops the rest of my life. #if anyone reads this far please please acknowledge the degree of which I almost pathologically try again and again when I can guarantee #nearly everyone wouldn't and still fight to keep myself open to hope because that's just something in me that is like that. but BEING like #that is. repeatedly putting yourself in situations where you are powerless already and helpless to get better and then are hurt more and #there's no way to escape it's just the repeated nature of it and then trying to not be the issue. #it's the problem in itself. #my ambition SHOULD be smarter. #god I'll go into this when I fully understand it another time. i don't think i have this phrased in a way to make all the dots of what i #mean correlate in the significant ways to anyone but me #but hey i guess i'm expecting anyone to read this in a light to misperceive me in the first place instead of accept maybe I'm not explainin #well or giving me the benefit of the doubt. see. #delete

[wickershells]

Few theologies (I know of) are more depressing and self-loathing than side b christianity. Your masochistic punitive desire for purity does nothing but hurt you; and you're made in divine image, are you not? What makes you think god wants your misery more than your love? So sad

#I think it's pretty interesting though; christianity is rooted in the very nature of suffering. christ as saviour means there is need to be #saved. the christian symbol is the very cross he died and was pierced on. acts of self-harm and suicide are sacralised here #it only makes sense for I would even argue the majority of western christians (can only speak to western) to focus so much on #hamartiology and to an extent eschatology. to think an innate quality of your existence is there to test/tempt you rather than a simple #and morally neutral aspect of your creation. as if kisses change kismet. faith born out of pain will always circle back to it #not to mention that it is a self-caused suffering; both rooted in and directed at You. christianity should be fundamentally about others #mine

[multishipper-baby]

Thinking about the Goldami kids turning out kind of evil like their momma and how that would be for Golden...

#myocs #golden and fucked up evil magical children is quite the concept imo #I imagine cami would be reformed to some extent by them getting married? but she still has many old habits that aren't good #like you know. mind controlling people for her own ends #she teaches the kids to do that too because she wants them to succed and be in control of their lives #but she doesn't tell golden. he wouldn't get it she thinks. he's too good natured to understand how the real world works #she just wants what's best for their children and what he doesn't know won't hurt him #BOY would golden feel horrible if he ever finds out #goldami

[thelostboys87]

don’t even know how to structure the bobby novella bc I’m not sure where his arc would end in that context because overall his arc ends with dying which is not something i would write in his pov, it’s hard to create an arc within his larger arc when it ends like That, and also i have visions from when he’s in his hometown before his diagnosis to the weeks after his diagnosis to when he’s in the middle of it, which all feel like separate parts to me of something and i can’t tell if that means multiple bobby novellas or one bobby beast of a novella spanning months. all i know is i will write that weird gay little dude and make sure he’s loved from all angles

#like I suppose his arc can end when he like. naturally resigns himself to it #which is hard to explain but the best way I can is like I can’t imagine writing bobby as narrator when he’s like. in hospice #at the end etc cause his ass is just sleeping and watching the muppets and busy getting ready to. you know #in the prettiest star Brian’s narration naturally fades as he closes in on dying so I’d like to reflect that #it’s just knowing when that would be for my best friend who I am so sad abt all the things I willingly did to him #he eventually gets to a point where he doesn’t want to think too hard abt anything and quite honestly he can’t #he just wants to chill out and rest…so that I think is the extent a pov of his could go #but idk if I want to write that far #we will find out though!!!! my biggest fear /pos is all of this culminating into bobby novel #thinking about this srsly fixing my trauma about earth it’s so fascinating and makes me feel more compassionate and considerate!!!!!

[forevercloudnine]

“Whatever he is now, we all know he was a criminal. And he knows Batman.”

Batman (2016) #52

#bruce wayne #mr. freeze #victor fries #love any comic that goes into how batman's villains 'know' him in a way no one else does #since they're familiar with him through years of interactions #but the side of him they interact with isn't the same one he shows to friends and family #not that he ISN'T capable of being cruel to friends and family #but y'know. he didn't dedicate his entire life to taking out his trauma on them #'cold days' is one of my all time favorite batman stories because it really gets into the consequences of bruce's anger #it's a very common thing in batman comics to demonstrate bruce's emotional state by how brutal he is #like his torturing of scarecrow in heart of hush #or his torturing of victor specifically in batman eternal #or his torture of the entire maximum security wing in arkham in mythology #it's interesting to think about how that would affect his villains in the long term #like yes on a logical level they know that batman is a 'good person' who would never kill them #and has repeatedly demonstrated that he does care about them to some extent #but if you've been framed for something and you hear that batman is furious and coming to get you #are you really going to expect him to be reasonable and help you? #or are you going to remember the dozens of times he's tortured you as punishment #this plus the cyclical nature of how often they purposefully provoke him to get his attention #tends to make the batman&villain relationship feel like a mutually toxic abusive relationship (to me anyway) #anyway this story always makes me think of victor telling bruce 'all i've ever really wanted is to be your friend' in urban legends #when he's drugged and describing how he & batman & nora could work great together #and year of the villain when nora hears that victor is helping batman #and she calls him a 'hopeless romantic always trying to find new ways to be loved' #anyway i've put enough tags in now right no one's reading down this far #so #freezebat

[silphilis]

i hate knowing why i do things thats so fucked. i have medical brainrot and its still not enough to erase the comprehensive collection of data i have on why ive done and felt everything that i have done and felt for my whole life. ruins the fun of it. buzzkill. cockblock. etcetera. shawties that cant even fuck up their own life in peace because they are painfully aware of why they want to act up and how to fix it. fuck you

#stupid silly interweb posts . last post related . #me outwardly : i dont follow up or chase people because im being normal and chill abt the fuck of it all #me internally immediately after : this is because last time you did repeatedly remind someone every time u had plans because they ditched u #for someone else every single time u did not and when u reminded them they did in fact. forget again and then when u expressed ur feelings #about it they chewed you out for not being upset constructively enough. after this u never saw them again #alternatively there was That Other Event . for this reason u are afraid to ever express excessive pursuance of anyone because they might #actually just not care about you at all and u will end up knitting sweaters and driving 100 miles to see someone who would not even help u #off the floor if they were right next to u . u are also afraid the extent of your ability to care for someone is something that is not #possible for you to experience in return and are choosing to in response refuse your natural instinct to be really nice to everyone and #remember their favorite color to spend 6 months knitting them the most perfect sweater they have ever beheld . u actually never cared if #they gave u anything back u just want like . basic decency . it would be enough if we could just sit together again . anyways fuck this . #im going to start barking and howling like a bad dog just to say i can do something wrong even when i know that it is

[fideidefenswhore]

Your thoughts on the prolific author Jean Plaidy? Did you read any of her books? Do you have favorite/most hated? What do you think about her view on the Tudors, Boleyn's, Yorks, Stuarts, Hapsburgs, etc?

I have found them very dull, paint by the numbers, etc. Honestly I find most of the novels from that era of that era that way, though, it's part of why I can't stand Weir's, hers just feel like a complete emulation of Norah Loft's which are also that way for me. I feel like newer authors of the genre are more likely to take risks, even if all their creative decisions are not my favorite, I can respect that (Suzannah Dunn, Christopher Rae, etc).

To be more specific, as a Henry VIII Enjoyer, these novels miss the mark for me. He's always very one-dimensional, sadistic satyr meets bluff hail-fellow-well-met, extremely pliable and easy to manipulate; it's just very boring and not satisfying to read.

#anon #very unpopular but to some degree i would even say philippa gregory > jean plaidy #(just as far as...entertainment? her depiction of henry is also like that. altho the film adaptation somehow made it even worse) #and philippa gregory > alison weir again very limitedly and only pertaining to fiction #(bcus honestly i think weir's depiction of henry might be even worse than pgreg) #(maybe even worse than margaret george's which is saying A LOTTT) #(probably as bad as norah loft's. but she's a fan. so) #i actually have some sliding door theories on pgreg tho #i basically think that her books were the gateway for weir gaining credibility #bcus they were so outrageous (a very hateful and homophobic interpretation of a slightly less but still homophobic theory from warnicke) #they made weir seem moderate and credible in comparison #and we have been stuck with that albatross ever since. god hates us every one. #i also believe weir segued to mantel's popularity to some extent #it demonstrated the popularity and marketability of that sort of portrayal of AB #cerebral ; cold; calculating and very fun to hate #of course that began earlier but while LiT is more sympathetic than some of her later works; #you definitely get the sense AW is having a lottt of fun hating her in certain sections #(earlier with TOBG i should say) #whatever tf pgreg said about her #'of criminal nature' agrewafrhdsijfs

[musical-chick-13]

Maybe I’ve just been Thinking Too Much About the Concept of Justice due to...currently watching....something (Idon’twannatalkaboutit)..........but GENUINELY the way most of y’all talk about the death penalty and about ANYONE who decides to go through law school for ANY reason is terrifying.

#like. aside from the fact that y'all think thoughtcrime is real (to the extent that it's the Same Thing as actually committing a heinous #crime that affects real people) and would thus be punishable by death (fuck you if you think this btw) #I simply don't think anybody should have the power to decide who lives and who dies #that is a level of absolute and (in the case of death) irreversible power that I believe NO ONE is entitled to #and like. idk. maybe this is just the result of The OCD™ always telling me that because of [unrelated innocuous thing] I'm a terrible human #and should kill myself for the good of society. but. uh. given the inherent fallibility of human nature #and the fact that the justice system is fucked up in the first place #and the fact that marginalized people of any kind are ALWAYS demonized for being marginalized by the oppressors in power #I don't think it's worth risking all those innocent lives for what YOU consider a personally-satisfying idea of justice that could be #achieved through other means #idk man when your brain (inaccurately but still significantly) is always convincing you that you are an Irredeemably Evil™ person #it makes you scared to just. exist as a person in society when people talk like this all the time about people they believe don't deserve #human rights or who should ALWAYS be executed in bloody painful gruesome ways with NO chance of anything else #because you're gonna think that they mean you! that you are included in that!! even if that's not their intention #!!!!! aside from EVERYTHING ELSE I've mentioned that is gonna fuck up people's mental health SO much #(ESPECIALLY if they're stuck in a terrible church environment that condemns them for innocuous things!!!!) #I understand that we're all angry and the world is terrible but maybe consolidating ALL major decisions within One Justice Person or #One Organization is bad actually!!!! even if that person/group is you and you mean well!!!!!!! #tw: suicidal ideation #tw: death #my god I hope this doesn't breach containment I do NOT need people telling me I need to reevaluate my stance that 'human rights' #includes 'all humans' #this blog does not support capital punishment if that's a dealbreaker for you then...don't interact with me I guess??? #also every single lawyer ever is not your inherent enemy it's not like cops

[kindaorangey]

thinkingggg about loser geek whatever again

#bmc #thunder rambles #ok so basically the numbers in be more chill are all written with the fact that theyre sung by teenagers in mind #(barring the parts sung by adults lolol) #which means theres a lot of slang and silliness and it's to the point where it's almost a charade of what the song would have been w adults #e.g. do you wanna ride is a seduction song but because of stuff like the fact brooke is borrowing her mother's car and the ridiculousness #of pinkberry being the final blow of her flirting with jeremy #it lands very firmly on the side of 'these 16/17 y/os are awkward' and it comes across as them Acting Like adults and failing at it #all of the traditional 'i want' songs and character songs are kind of undermined by the silly nature of the lyrics but that is a good thing #bc its very charming #AND #in loser geek whatever #it means that even though it's like a 'turning point' number #the decision is rooted in indecision and by extention low self esteem and by extension the years of bullying and ostracisation #jeremy has faced #which in turn ADDS to the decision he makes #and firmly cements it as the wrong one like even he knows its not a good decision he just cant NOT do it and i believe him 100% #and basically it's reflected in the awkwardness of the song. the 'woah-oh-oh's and 'i'm... the cool guy' #and most of all. the note change in the final 'im not the loser the geek or whatever ever again' because it starts triumphant #then goes sad and tragic #and then perseveres to go higher again #like the final notes of the song fool you for a second that this is being played for a morally flawed decision but good from a certain pers #pective #but then the note changes and youre like oh shit oh yeah this is him willingly walking into the open mouth of the monster #idk IDK #its like. with all of the traditional musical number story beats. not a SINGLE ONE can commit fully to being that thing cuz its entrenched #in the awkwardness of the characters #loser geek whatever in this way cannot commit itself to being the 'turning point' questionably triumphant musical number #BECAUSE it is jeremy being a shell of a human being that has brought him to this point. #AND 'this point' is him signing away his agency and isolating himself.

[uiruu]

one way to tell the difference between black metal and death metal is that death metal is less occult-themed and more just like burly toughguys lol. on average anyway, of course there are exceptions and crossovers between the two. 

but in general, black metal is like a shrill wintery spiteful goblin spurning the world, death metal is more like a big orc bludgeoning people with a big club. black metal is mysticism and curses and depression, death metal is violence and catharsis and anger. black metal is like a solitary gremlin holed up in a cave, alone, scorning all outsiders, whereas death metal is like a gore-filled slasher movie lol. i mean there are also the death metal people who are like dnd nerds, or people who just like the musicianship, or whatever else, but generally speaking these are the sorts of archetypes imo.

#tbh death metal musicians are probably much more well adjusted as a result lol it’s probably a better outlet for that shit... #cause at the end youre just like ''ah okay. thats out of my system'' #i mean thats true of both to an extent #and they channel different but definitely similar emotions #i kinda like black metal more though lol. what does that say about me? #i mean i like when it gets a little more atmospheric and stuff especially #o #also you can see how the things i listed about black metal would appeal to fascists. scorning all outsiders? that's their thing #however there's actually a rather large amount of leftist black metal that channels that same sort of scorned feeling differently #like at capitalism or at fascism directly or just in a non political way at depression and anxiety and all sorts of things #a lot of black metal is nature themed and so lends itself to an environmentalist message #though maybe a somewhat pessimistic one

[eruhamster]

not to be annoying but i do think a lot of people mischaracterize falin. shes got the most drastic canon v fanon thing going on. which i guess makes sense bc 1. we dont see much of her and 2. lot of the fan stuff are anime-onlies that have seen even less

but i think like a good 90% of the time i see falin-centric art or posts im like hrm hrm hrm thats all wrong no nope no-siree

she's just a cool chick that takes life as it comes, doesn't hold grudges even against a mother that apparently was trying to beat the magic outta her, finds her older brother the coolest person in the world, and has autism about observing life (and death, she loves the ghosts she has a connection to) and nature and taking care of things (including taking care of her brother, which is why she's even in the dungeons; she saw her scrawny mess of a brother and decided she had to fix that).

and i think my favorite part that people don't talk about is... she would have done the same for marcille or laios if it were one of them that was eaten. you could see it in her eyes:

it's what shuro misunderstands about her. it's easy to see her feminine, cute, good girl pieces and forget the rest of her. but she loves things to an ends-of-the-earth extent; the kind of caring that makes you a little insane. and that's how I think she and laios end up on the same page with their weirdness. they have different interests, but they are the same level of committed to those interests.

it's easy to love her, because she probably loves you just as much, if not more.

EDIT: for the love of god stop reblogging this only to add some comment or tag or reply saying 'op you forgot [BLATANTLY FANON INTERPRETATION]'. falin as we know her is not a pushover/people pleaser/infantilized, see this version of my post. also stuff like 'female shuro was in love with laios in the genderbent comic' and 'falin was going to marry shuro because she felt bad' are just things you made up in your head

#idk i love her #dont take this as insulting i like when people do anything with her i just wanna vomit my feelings #dungeon meshi #another example of this is how she takes the dragon with her when she's resurrected #it isn't like her to leave that little thing behind #wriggling helplessly in the grass #she picked that little thing up and took it with her without a second thought