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jalluzas-ferney · 1 day

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OK VERY VERY UNPOPULAR OPINION

Look, I LOVE KOKO (from the Ninjago movie) I REALLY DO

but I feel like Misako haters who in the same breath adore Koko forget the fact that Koko literally dated and LAYED THE evil warlord that destroys everything and harms innocent lives - all while you know, being Lady Iron Dragon….a warrior who’s supposed to protect the innocent and what not….

AND THEN when she’s raising Lloyd, according to her, she would always tell him to not be ashamed of who his father is…..?

LIKE GIRL LMAO IM SORRY BUT THIS WOMANS MORALS WENT ALL THE WAY OUT THE WINDOW 😭😭😭😭 LIKE WDYM YOU FELL IN LOVE AND DID THE DEVILS TANGO W THE MAN WHO DECIMATES CIVILIZATION AND DESTROYS FAMILIES?!() SHE REALLY THOUGHT SHE COULD FIX HIM?!?) GIRL WHERE ARE YOUR MORLAS THIS MAN IS EVIIILLL😭😭😭 AND THEENNN WHEN THIS MAN CINTINUES TO BE A TERRIBLE FATHER AND CONTINUES TO TERRORIZE AND DESTROY THE CITY- ACTIVELY PUTTING HER AND LLOYD IN DANGER- SHE STILL TELLS LLOYD TO NOT BE ASHAMED?!??

KOKO. YOU CANNOT BE FR RN 😭😭😭😭 WHY TF WOULD SHE WANT HIM TO NOT BE ASHAMED OF HIS AWFUL FATHER- JUST TELL HIM “YEAH YOUR DAD SUCKS NEVER BE LIKE HIM-“ LIKE LMAOO

And where I’m going w this is that yall despise misako for leaving Lloyd at Darkleys and paint her as a terrible mother and what not - but then turn around and praise and adore Koko like yalll Koko is NOT perfect either 😭 this woman also did awful mistakes and acted dumb by tellling Lloyd to not be ashamed of who his EVIL FUCKING father is 😭😭😭

And Ik like maybe shes saying that to comfort him and make him feel like Garmadon being evil isn’t his fault, cuz if you say “YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF WHO YOUR FATHER IS” sounds very harsh and makes it sound like Lloyd has fault in that. But the way Koko phrases it sounds like she spent her life trying to convince Lloyd to not hate his father or smth and only then snapped at Garmadon when he took over the city. Like if my husband is some evil warlord taht constantly puts my city and friends in danger I wouldn’t try to convince my son to not hate his father bruh 😭 I will not defend that man just because he’s my sons dad 💀 a bad person is a bad person Koko you should have been mad from the start bruh 😭😭

So again- my point is- I love both missko and Koko but the amount of hate misako gets compared to Koko is super annoying and I feel like I need to remind yall that Koko isn’t the perfect angel yall act like she is 😨

so stop contradicting yourselves!!!

#I feel like I’m gonna get attacked by this #but someone had to say it #cuz when I watched the Lego movie recently I noticed this and I was like #WAIT😭#your lady iron dragon #trying to defend innocent people and protect the land but your folding for this man right here ?!😔#WHERE R UR MORALS 😃#and you know #the rest I mentioned #do stop acting like missko is the worst or whatever for sending her kid to a boarding school in order to protect him☹️#none of them are perfect!!!#they are both flawed in their own strange ways #ninjago #lego ninjago #Ninjago movie #ninjago misako #misako ninjago #koko ninjago #ninjago koko #lego ninjago movie #the lego ninjago movie #AND YEAH IK THE NINJAGO MOVIE IS GOOFY AS HELL BUT SO IS NINJAGO ESPECIALLY EARLY SEASONS SO LET ME TAKE ITS NONESENSE SRS #like Misako fell in love before Garmadon was super evil and stuff #and left when he became evil and all #sooooo #she gets a point for that at least

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duskbats · 2 years

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eden became a vampire & moved to moonwood mill for the drama.

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orchideae · 6 months

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You know you're an adult when every once in a while, when you inevitably need to go out to the store for just one thing, because no matter how old you get, you'll always forget something you can't be without (toiler paper). And you go through your wallet in the most dedicated hunt of your life (ever) for all of your coins to see if this is the moment, where you become the old lady and/or man at the cash register that we all complained about to our mothers when we were little.

#[ ooc. ] don't try to make it logical or edit your soul according to the fashion. rather; follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.#[ yeah. i became that lady. ]#[ but i did it; i paid for my toilet paper with just coins. ]#[ i know every young person (listen i'm only 34) is sitting at their desk groaning at me. ]#[ but i also know all of you 28+ people are sitting there-- tell me you haven't done exactly this before. ]#[ tell me that when you become eventually overtly aware of the weight of your coins in your wallet. ]#[ or like me-- keep eyeing a little dish i have on a shelf (don't ask) to hold my coins because i refuse to keep that bs in my wallet. ]#[ but also toilet paper. it'll get me every time. ]#[ also i swear more writing today-- i know this bronchitis is kicking my ass but i'm hoping the antibiotics will kick it harder. ]#[ ALSO PLEASE GIVE ME WRIOTHESLEY. i lost the 50/50 and i'm pulling every ounce of energy i have left to-- ]#[ get him. i have 48 more wishes to go at max. kill me. i will never farm again in my life ever after this. ]

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dootznbootz · 5 months

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I love historical buildings made into something new! We got the Bookstore that used to be a bank from the 1900s! We got the Souvenir gift shop that used to be a cheese shop! And finally, we got the homemade candy, coffee, and ice cream shop that used to be a bar/brothel from the 1890s!

✨History ✨

#fanfuckingtastic sweets. like holy shit. they have EVERYTHING and most their own recipe!! but yeah...upstairs???#it's usually used for Art shows and fancy shindigs now. but you can TELL what it used be 👀 The walls were VELVET and all the little rooms #it also kept the name but luckily “The Pearl” is vague so it can stay! :D #The fact that a cheese shop became a souvenir shop is IRONIC as we're “America's Dairyland”. They KNEW what they were doing.#“ladies' room” is still labeled as the “powder room” in some of these places! (they're updated and renovated but a lot of hte building is #the same for the history) IT'S NEAT #I love the history! HATE THE DRIVING. >:( people drive STUPID there!#Mad rambles

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milkiedimitrescu · 1 year

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Get this post to at least 20 like's and I will make this a comic series. 🙂 I know it won't, but at least try to pls 🥺

This is a dumb AU but I come up with random things ok

#Been thinking of this AU ever since SU ended almost 3 year's ago #What if there was a resident evil 8 cross over with Steven universe? And instead of the diamond's grieving over pink's shattering #They literally search every planet including earth to find a replacement #But they actually do find Lady Dimitrescu in the village and took her without her own daughter's and partner knowing #And they keep her as a replacement of pink because of her height and the fact that she is not like any other human but infact a #Immortal human #The other reason why is because she actually reminds them of pink is with her temper and need to be special #YALL SEE WHERE I AM GOING WITH THIS?#alcina dimitrescu #pink diamond #steven universe #resident evil #resident evil 8 #lady dimitrescu #So much tags #nostalgia shit #looking back on old fandoms and making random aus with my current fandom #Also yeah Alcina was just a immortal human until she became a diamond in this but still has the same name #It is on her chest like blue and yellow #The diamonds implanted a diamond in alcina 's chest to give her diamond abilities.🙃#REPLACEMENT AU COMIC #Ill reveal her diamond abilities either in the actual comic or in a future post

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the-jam-to-the-unicorn · 3 months

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Olena gave an interview to BBC

youtube

#this interview was so good and had some great answers #and our queen destroyed klitschko and his bullshit with a small and like two sentences #not on my bingo card but here for it #love how you can see all the answers running through her head and she has to fight herself to stop herself from saying too much 😂#“you talked with vova about this ... your are the first lady ... you talked ... first lady ... be nice olena ...”#THAT LITTLE SMIRK AND WINK ENDED ME 😂😂😂#and taking a sip of her water to swollow down everything else 😂#i felt the deep sigh after the “hAs ThE wAr ChAnGeD yOuR hUsBaNd” question #if she would get money for everytime someone asks her her foundation wourld be swimming in money #i also dont know why almost eeeevery journalist has to ask #like ... other journalists asked before #she answered so many times #what do you all expect??????#that she suddenly is like “Oh fucking yeah is now dancing tango and became a moon lover” or something like that????????#and even if he has changed in a notable / bigger way...she wouldnt tell you she is going to proect her man #loved the christmas question at the end #and how olena dodged the part about the typical ze christmas traditions 😅#Youtube

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lovedeluxe92 · 7 months

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my great great uncle’s name was kermit how fucking legendary

#ahead of his time #apparently he was in ww2 and met this italian lady but over time she just became insane but they had kids and she wore him down basically #i wanna know more about this mf tbh i need to call my grandpa and ask. i think that was his dads only uncle #fun fact my great grandpa gordon actually died due to a tractor mower accident where he was decapitated. yeah. fun family trauma fact lmao #but kermit lay is the funniest fucking name ever

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victorluvsalice · 9 months

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However, there are only so many puzzles you can do, as my family found out during the height of the pandemic. So it wasn't long before the gang started doing their own things again -- Smiler hopped back on their laptop to start modding Blicblock; Alice got back on the old travel easel and started painting again (first another surreal painting, then a flirty painting), and Victor went out in the rain to practice his Mischief magic -- and immediately learned Burgliate, the spell that lets you steal stuff. XD Welp then! Unsure what to do with him after that, and not wanting him to stay out in the rain (or, accurately, out in the THUNDERSTORM -- as you can see by that picture of the poor fried snorkeler, things were getting dangerous out there!), I had him go inside to use the toilet, then upgrade that and the sink because, hell, we already did the bed. *shrug* It's all Handiness skill! He then went to join Smiler at the kitchen table with some leftover fish for breakfast, and the two shared a few cute flirts as Alice finished up her flirty painting and discovered it was a masterpiece! :) Only a 5K one, though, so I decided she could keep that one to display rather than selling it. :p I was just having her go in and hit the toilet while Victor cleaned up his breakfast dishes --

When who should show up but one Leila Illes, to ask Smiler AGAIN if they wanted to be best friends. O.O WTF -- we established this yesterday, Leila! You're too new a friend to get that label! Smiler sent her packing a little more tersely this time, and she slumped out, all dejected. I can't say I feel too sorry for her, though -- I've never had a Sim who, after getting rejected for best friendship the previous day, and with the negative sentiments still active, showed up the following day to try again! O.o What the hell, game...

ANYWAY -- with Leila having learned a few things about boundaries (we hope), the cuteness continued with Alice getting her breakfast (some nice crumpets) and she and Victor chatting at the table while Smiler finished up their mods. Smiler, feeling peckish themselves at this point, then asked for a drink from Victor, which he was happy to give...

And then I was like "well, it IS their honeymoon" and sent them to woohoo again. XD What, it kept them busy! Much like showering in the rain kept Alice busy. *sigh* I got her dressed again, then -- once Victor and Smiler were done with their woohoo -- sent her in to have a nice makeout with Victor while Smiler tested their Blickblock mods with a game. Victor then settled in for a nap while Alice went outside to dance...

And once Victor's energy was mostly full, I was like "oh screw this -- I kind of wanted them home for Spookfest anyway" and had the gang end the vacation early and head home.

...and then I had to reload the save I had fortunately made right before that decision (right about when Victor went to bed) because I was like "oh shit, I left all their fish and leftovers and stuff in the fridge!" So I quickly grabbed all that and THEN sent them home. *whew* There have been a lot of moments in this game lately that emphasizes the importance of saving at key moments, haven't there? Save often, people! You never know when it'll save you!

#sims 4 #the lazy save #victor van dort #alice liddell #smiler always #yeah my family did a looot of puzzles during the worst years of the pandemic #mostly because Mom had gotten Dad one as a Christmas present right before and we all kind of became addicted #we haven't done one in a while though #maybe one day!#but yes some cute flirty times from the gang #Victor doing more upgrading because well why the hell not #and Leila being a bit on the stalkery side #like what the hell I thought for SURE after getting rejected once Sims didn't try again #Lady Smiler told you no YESTERDAY #this system is a liiiittle bit broken I must admit #but then again you can say that about a lot of things in Sims 4 #and while the woohoo was as much about giving them something to DO on the miserable rainy day #it DOES make sense for a couple on their honeymoon to woohoo more than once :P #I could have tried for different locations if it had been nicer out #maybe in the future #and yes got back to the house saw the notice saying Smiler had gotten their laptop back #and was like 'shit the stuff in the fridge!'#SAVE OFTEN EVERYONE #queued

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david-watts · 1 year

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whilst putting the big books back on the shelf, I stumbled across a book of photographs from the collections of a particular photographer from where I live. ignoring the fact that the compilers didn’t know how to date photographs (like did they REALLY think a picture with a horse-drawn taxi and women in lingerie dresses were from the 1930s???) and I found a picture of one of the old k-class garratts on the north-east dundas tramway. love that

#the 'knows a little about historical fashion' in me knows that there were quite a few misdated pictures in it #and I think it's because they might've been developed at a later time or reprinted at a later time #because they had perfectly 1917 era fashion in a picture dated 1917.#but yeah like not until the popularisation of mobile phones and the internet did we here have the same fashion as on the mainland #yet alone the fashions coming out of the uk and america #so give about two or maybe even three years before things come and go out of style and maybe more for that since you didn't chuck #an old dress once it became unfashionable you'd usually alter it to be fashionable again #but like. for a regatta you'd want to wear your best. that's usually more up-to-date than say your not-leaving-the-house-today dress #and this picture was dated 1920s. meaning that it's likely later than 1920 on the dot which if it were I could see #but honestly every single lady in that picture was wearing a white dress and the ones you could see had a coloured belt #not that you could tell since. black and white.#and the hat styles said what #I looked it up to double-check and those hats matched mid-1900s perfectly AND SO DID THE MEN'S HATS #so I'd say... late 1900s? maybe even 1910 or 11? y'know. A DECADE EARLIER?#like come on you were paid to write this book #and dear fucking god the picture I mentioned in the post body. dates 1930s. it probably was taken around 1909 when that building was new #it couldn't be after 1911 for reasons that would be obvious if you know a little about where I live #and it's really only on these few photographs. and I know it was 1987 so they couldn't like. google the fashion era or anything #which tbh is the best bet at dating this stuff because looking up online stuff about where I live is. tricky #like c'mon I wanna look up creepy little-known stuff about where I live. I don't wanna rely on a seemingly abandoned wordpress page

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eka-paige · 2 years

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Thinking about the end of amphibia

Specifically in the second last ep when yunaan and olivia showed up and I went "ha gay" and my friend went "are they?" And I said "its Disney so I doubt it" AND THEN I WAS RIGHT AND THEY WERE?

I cant remember the name for it but this was a ship I started shipping more as a joke cause I didnt think it would be cannon BUT IT FUCKING IS

#fuck yeah #i still have to point that out to him #like when they got together #i was like #cause my shit ship became cannon #and i shipped it as a joke until i actually shipped it #amphibia the hardest thing #amphibia ending #amphibia spoilers #amphibia #general yunan #lady olivia #yunaan x Olivia

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hellafluff · 2 years

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just had a d&d session where im the lone elf in a group of cat furries

#it was fun but one of the characters kept reacting to every decision with Lesbian Brain and trying to find a lady npc to hit on #so that was a bit annoying #but its fine im playing the grounded character in a group of funny characters its expected that im gonna be like GUYS THIS IS SERIOUS #every ten minutes #but yeah they're all anthro cats and im an elf i dont know how we became a group because we started level 3 and didnt talk backstory before #the game #crazee talk #d&d #dnd

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doli-nemae · 2 years

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Can I watch at least ONE movie with good vs evil plot wITHOUT FEELING DEJA VU??

#this lady watched yesterday Star Wars Episode 1 AND THE LEVEL OF USELESNESS OF REPUBLIC IN WAR CONFLICT IS INCREDIBLE #like. the invasion was stopped because of union of people of that planet + 2 jedies #and small kid that was fecking able to blow up whole enemy starship #but Daryna Republic has sent Jedies #YEAH AWESOME MAYBE ANOTHER TIME THEY SHOULD SEND MORE THAN TWO COOL DUDES TO FREE OCCUPIED TERITORIES #JUST SAYIN`#ALSO JAR JAR BINGS IS THE WORST CHARACTER #IF I WAS A JEDI AND WATCHED THIS FILM I WOULD`VE BECAME SITH IMMEDIATELY BECAUSE OF HATE AND ANGER I FELT

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tvonq · 2 years

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i dream way too much

#had like 2939842 dreams it felt like #think it started with me walking in a shoppint centre but i had to run back somewhere cuz i left my money on the floor #then i ran back and stood in line to use this change machine cuz i needed chinese 15 notes??#so i was next but the lady behind me put her money in and when her change came out i threw it on the floor #i couldnt even use the machine cuz i had english money #then smth about baking cookies and then using this shower head to clean a car but i got it on everyone #then gumball became sentient and did whatever cuz he knew he was a cartoon #then this zoo keeper ate an apple that was meant for the monkeys cuz it had stuff and then EYE was the zoo keeer and right behind me was a #glass wall for the monkeys and every single one broke oht and tried to grab me so i just flew out over the river #and yeah idk #🦀#☁️

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bluerosefox · 9 months

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Assassin Heir? Crime Fighting Furry? NOPE NO THANK YOU!

"Danyal, its time to end this game and return with me."

Danny should had known Clockwork had something in mind when he sent him on this mission. He knew he should had been suspicious of the time keeper when he noticed the little 'this is going to be fun' smile on his face when he sent Danny off into the portal.

"Get back here you demon spawn 2.0!"

But how was he supposed to know that he'd wake up in this world version of himself in a pit full of corrupted (AND NASTY) ectoplasim at the tender age of five or that when he swam up to the surface he'd be meeting face to face with what was apparently a cult.

"-O just spotted him a block away! I'll try to cut itty bitty bridie off!"

An Assassins Cult his, new to him, loving yet a little insane mother was in charge of (though during the few months he stayed in the compound he heard rumors and gossip from maids and others alike that if his grandfather returned from the dead he'll take over once again, no doubt punish Talia for creating another heir after the failure of the last one, most likely was going to kill Danny and that... that was can of worms Danny didn't wanna deal with yet)

"Ten bucks says they try to stab RR when we get the feral thing home"

"...Losers bet...."

Danny had lived with his mother for a while after being brought back from the 'dead' for apparently the first time, it turned out training a five year old with an actual sword and a dumbass hidden revenge seeking teacher was a terrible idea.

"I swear if this one tries to murder me like the others I'm asking Zatanna if there is a curse on me."

He dealt with her high demands of perfection, the endless training, and the constant comparisons to his apparent older brother Damain... Who didn't know Danny, or rather Danyal existed.

Nor did his father (when Danny, using his powers he's kept hidden since 'waking' up in this Realm, he sneaked his way around the base and discovered how he came into the world. And tbh he couldn't blame his mom how she made him, she was an assassin first and foremost, being naturally pregnant would had painted a target on her for to long... but he also felt it was unfair and an asshole move on his unsuspecting father as well)

"As your elder brother I demand you to stop running!"

Now don't get him wrong, he did like his new mother (total badass assassin lady and all that) and he knew she loved him in her own... deadly way. But yeah, she really shouldn't be taking care of kids. He could tell she struggled with wanting to be a normal mother but her first instinct after so many years was to be an assassin first.

Something she was trying to engrave into Danny with as well.

"Ah, hello Beloved. I see you've learned of our Danyal."

"Talia. Back away from him and leave Gotham now."

"I can not do that. The League needs an heir and since Damian refuses to return... I have decided to create a new one and I shall not be leaving until he returns with me."

"Talia."

Hence why when Danny, or rather Danyal al Ghul had gotten decent control over his powers he decided to leave the League. Again nothing wrong with the life his mom leads, to each their own, but he... really, really didnt want to be an assassin. Or an assassin heir.

So here he was, after almost a year on the run, using his powers and training to out smart and out maneuver his mother and her many band of Assassins, in Gotham. One of the last places he ever wanted to run to cause he knew his father and brother lived here.

It was just his luck that his mother had managed to intercept his train ride that passed into Gotham for a few hours and forced him to run into the city...

Add her assassins into the mix and running into Robin, who heard from Oracle his mother had been spotted chasing a young boy across the city, that same night.

After that it became a full on "catch me if you can" chase for not only his mother but for the batclan as well.

And after two whole days of chase, it seemed like the final showdown was about to begin because everyone was on top of this rooftop, his mother and her assassins on one side, his father and the batclan on the other and Danny well... he was right in the middle of all of it.

He just had to hope no one would notice him once the fighting started...

#danny phantom #danny fenton #dp x dc #blue rambles #crossover #writing ideas #random idea #danny phantom dc #basicly Danny is sent on a mission by CW #he wakes up in the DC version of himself in the pits after being killed and Talia tossing him in #he was created by Talia since shes head of the LOA now and needs her own heir #but she once again wants Bruce's bloodline in it so she used some leftover dna she still had #so no one knows Danny was created until he left about a year later #danny has his ghost powers since he took a dip in the pits #but had to relearn some control and kept it secret #he knows his mom would see it as 'the pits granted my heir its powers.' mindset #so hes been on the run #and didnt wanna go to Gotham cause... his dad dresses as a gaint bat #and dont get him started on the rest of the batfam #he doesnt wanna be an assassin or a crime fighting furry #in case some people didnt get it. the words being spoken happen when Danny is running all across Gotham away from those after him #guess who said what lol #i want danny to be completely independent and trying to take care of himself tbh #but hes still baby to everyone else #talia is slowy becoming a little unhinged due to being the Demon Head now #maybe due to the stress of it all? or maybe due to a curse? idk

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weaselle · 1 year

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i wanna do a thing where i lay out studies that show things in different primates that show us parts of ourselves as humans. Call it Primates: Through the Looking Glass or The Monkey in the Mirror or something

There are studies and documentaries that show things about Gorillas, Chimpanzees, Bonobos, Baboons, Macaques... that just make sense to me. That if shown right would make sense to a lot of people, i think.

like... they were studying this one group of gorillas --

okay wait. First of all, you know a silverback (the Big Male) of the group is not the leader or in charge or anything, right? He has a role, and it includes a certain amount of control, which i’ll explain briefly, but he’s not, like, in charge.

wait, you know all that Dominance/Alpha theory about wolves is all wrong, right?

wait wait wait, and also that like, the bull or the stag or whatever in a herd is not in charge of anything, right? right?

hold on. the wolves is it’s own post, the herd thing i might get back to, we’re on gorillas, okay. Silverback is basically just the male head of an extended family in which plenty of the leadership is handled by the women of the family.

There are often 2-4 silverbacks, but one, usually the largest, will clearly be senior to the others who are often his sons or brothers. Silverbacks have three main roles

1: defend the group from all physical threats aside from people, these threats are mostly random male gorillas, chimpanzee baby-snatching gangs, and the occasional leopard. Just his alert presence handles most scenarios, and then maybe a few times a year he has to risk his life fulfilling this responsibility. It is this role that provides most of whatever actual power he has over the group, namely this: while he isn’t necessarily the one deciding when and where the group goes on a daily basis, if the most powerful/capable silverback does decide to travel a direction, they pretty much have to go with him, the family isn’t safe without him.

2: make babies. And this is one area where the ladies of the group will sometimes sort of vote with their ovaries, and favor a silverback that isn’t the main one, like “yeah, Frank, you are the biggest, but honestly you’re a dick and we’re going to make sure the next generation of silverbacks isn’t another one of you.” When you see a main large silverback in a group of gorillas, it isn’t, like, his blindly loyal harem, they have to approve of him. Also gorilla females move between groups, and sometimes they take members with them or start new groups and stuff. Anyway i’m getting off track, one of the silverbacks jobs is making babies

3. keep the peace This functions a lot like being in the back seat with your siblings with your parents up front. Basically any disputes within the group have to be handled within a certain parameter of decorum, because if it gets too out of hand HE’s going to come over, and He’ll be upset, which is low-key terrifying because He’s huge, and there’s no telling who He’ll decide is at fault or what he’ll do about it, so letting a situation get out of hand is a losing scenario for everyone involved really. Tho typically he will favor senior females in disputes, in a “don’t you talk that way to your mom” kind of way.

one last thing, silverbacks don’t actually transfer power between silverbacks via battle every time.

Like i was just reading accounts from a multi-generational observational study of some wild gorillas that featured one big silverback just straight up taking over by performing the silverback duties better and becoming preferred by everyone else in the group. There was no fight, it just became, i do the job better, everyone likes me better, kicking my ass can’t change that, and boom, he was the primary silverback. And the other silverback might have been a bit dull, or a bit of a bully, but like us their species’ success is largely dependent on social intelligence; once he saw the writing on the wall, that other, slightly larger sivlerback didn’t even bother trying to change the situation with a physical fight, he understood what had happened.

okay so all that was just to tell you all this story. lol. Here’s what i saw in one documentary:

This very big, getting old silverback, who was hugely popular and successful, with a very large and tightly bonded family group, and a couple of his hulking adult sons backing him up. Everybody in his group seemed to love him a lot, he was particularly calm in that gentle giant sort of way, a safe, emotionally steady presence, happy to help raise his sons and daughters with kindness, and who could become a raging nightmare if pressed by a leopard ... exactly what a band of gorillas wants in a silverback.

But one of his adult sons had plenty of silver on his own back, and was getting itchier and itchier to be main man of the group, and this is where we start our little drama

It seems to be coming to a head, and the observers are nervous about a fight for the position. The silverback and his son are both are huge, probably approaching 400lbs, mostly muscle, with long thick fangs and skulls topped with jaw muscles as big as human biceps to wield those teeth, which nature has given them primarily to fight other gorillas with.

But then the next day, the old man leads the fam up the mountain.

it’s winter, which is why they have come down the mountain in the first place. But as we discussed, if he goes somewhere, they have to go, so they all follow behind.

up he goes, and then he sits. And waits. It’s cold and there is much less food up here at this time of year. There’s nothing to do but sit hungry in the cold. His size and metabolism makes him the most able to withstand the cold, but even he is pretty uncomfortable.

And so he sits. And his family, perhaps confused, but loyal, sits around him.

But his son, the other huge silverback, with years of training even as an adult under his wise father, is ready and able to go off on his own. Finally, he stands up, makes clear his intentions to leave this uncomfortable place. A small handful of the other gorillas stand with him -- if he goes down the mountain, then they can safely leave as well. He turns and heads down the mountain. After a moment, a few more gorillas leave the main group to follow. All in all it winds up being nearly half.

The wise older silverback thoughtfully watches his son leave with about half the group. He sits a while longer in the cold, in the company of those most loyal to him, and then takes them along a different path down the mountain

And those two groups still ran into each other sometimes, and were friendly. And sometimes a couple gorillas would change between the two groups. They were still close.

But i just thought that was such an elegant, meaningful way for that gorilla to handle that whole situation. And it makes a completely human sort of sense to me.

#science and nature #gorillas #primates

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vanwritesfan-fiction · 4 months

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Liar, Liar

Joe finds out you've faked it in the bedroom before, and he's determined to make sure you never lie to him again

Warnings: smut (thigh riding, intercourse), language, fluff at the end

"I mean", Sarah paused as she topped off her glass of red wine, the bottle hitting your coffee table with a thump, "there's this expectation that we're just supposed to be at the ready whenever they get home, and sometimes I'm too tired." She sunk into the couch dramatically, her confession earning a couple of hums and nods in agreement from the group.

"Exactly! Like just because you have the stamina of an athlete, doesn't mean I do!", Rebecca chimed in, raising her glass to the group, a few intoxicated chuckles echoing through the living room.

You were tight lipped as you tucked your legs underneath you on the couch, taking a big gulp of your wine as you nervously played with the hem of your sweater.

It was your turn to host the monthly Bengals WAGS get together. It started out as a book club, but quickly became a gossip and venting session where everyone would reveal the things that bothered them about being married or dating a professional athlete. It wasn't really your scene to air out your dirty laundry to anyone outside of your relationship, but you wanted to make friends in the organization, so you offered to bring the alcohol.

"Y/N, you're awfully quiet tonight." All eyes were on you now, and you shrunk under the scrutiny. "Spill it girl, everyone's dying to know how Joe is in bed." Tiffany, the most senior wife on the team, she'd been married to her husband for over a decade, scooted forward towards you. Desperate to change the conversation, you pivoted. "Uh, can I get anyone more wine?" You quickly lifted to your feet and scurried to through the house before anyone could stop you.

"Yeah, baby, how am I in bed?" Joe's voice startled you as you collided with him in the kitchen, Joe catching you at the waist. "Oh my god, don't even start." You playfully slapped him on the chest before pulling away, making him chuckle. You disappeared into the pantry and reemerged with a couple of bottles of wine.

"Where is the bottle opener, babe?" You searched the usual drawer, coming up empty. "Here." Joe approached you from behind, his crotch pressing against your ass as he reached above you to grab the bottle opener. "You better have nothing but good things to say about me", he teased you, a whisper in your ear sending a shiver down your spine.

"That doesn't bother you, that people are asking about something so intimate?" You asked, furrowing your brow as you looked at Joe, who simply shrugged. "I mean, not really. As long as you're not getting too detailed", he smirked at you, making your stomach flutter, "its just your version of locker room talk. Its harmless in my eyes."

You removed the cork from one of the bottles with a large with a loud pop. "So I shouldn't tell them about how you like to-", you gestured at your chest suggestively. "Hey! Those are details." Joe wagged a finger at you, playfully patting your butt as you walked back to the living room.

"Y/N! You're just in time!", one of the other wives perked up as you reentered the room, filling up the glasses before you sat back down. "Oh really?" You weren't sure you wanted to hear what they were talking about to be honest. 'Yes! We've been talking about whether or not we've ever faked it with our guys." She wiggled her eyebrows at you, "you know, in the bedroom."

You choked on your wine, letting out a couple of forced coughs to catch your breath. "I, uh-", you were feeling the pressure to say something memorable. You really hadn't ever faked an orgasm with Joe, but you really wanted to make friends with the other wives, they were your lifeline when you spent a lot of weeks alone. "I'm sure I've done it once before, I just really can't remember." You immediately regretted saying that, your throat going dry.

****

Once all of the ladies had left and you had cleaned up the living room and kitchen, you headed upstairs to get ready for bed. Joe had disappeared at some point during the night upstairs to watch game tape, but when you checked his office, it was empty. You followed the sound of the shower to your bedroom, spotting Joe's pajamas laid out on the bed.

"Remind me to never host a party again", you chuckled, "The wives are something else." Joe barely acknowledged your presence as he walked out of the bathroom, a towel tied at his waist. "I was thinking we could go to brunch at this new place Sarah mentioned." Joe was silent as he slipped a t-shirt over his head. "Joe?"

"I have practice tomorrow", he finally bit out with a sigh.

"I know. I mean after practice. Maybe we could run a couple errands together? Its been a while since we've done that."

"After practice, I have meetings." Even if you didn't know your husband well, anyone could tell that Joe was upset about something.

"Babe, what's wrong?"

Joe let out a curt laugh, louder than intended. "I don't know. You're the one faking orgasms, why don't you tell me?" Joe wasn't boastful, neither in his private life or on the field, but he did have pride, and it was wounded tonight when he heard you telling all the wives how unsatisfied you were with him in the bedroom.

"Joe, listen, I can explain that-"

"How long have you been lying to me?" You knew you had to tread carefully here and make sure you didn't say the wrong thing. "I haven't been lying to you, Joe. You said it yourself, its just "locker room" talk."

"And we agreed, no details! I don't talk to the guys about you like that." Joe sat at the edge of the bed, his brow furrowed in anger. You straddled his lap, raking your hands through his wet hair. "You're right. I crossed a line, it won't happen again, okay? But really, babe, it was nothing." You teased him with a quick peck on the lips, Joe deepening the kiss as he held you in place by the back of the head. You moaned as you felt his tongue roam your mouth, gasping for breath as the two of you made out.

You broke apart out of necessity, your chest heaving as you looked at Joe's baby blue eyes, your faces inches from each other.

"Show me."

You held his face in your hands. "Show you what?"

"When I'm fucking you. Where you're faking it." You groaned as you lifted yourself off of his lap. "Joe, let it go, please." Joe hated losing, always had, and this admission felt like a loss to him. He grabbed your wrist as you tried to walk away, pulling you to stand between his legs. His fingers toyed with the zipper of your jeans before he unbuttoned them, pushing them past your hips and exposing your lace panties. He pressed a kiss just below your belly button, his lips lingering against your skin as you shivered. You stepped out of your jeans, kicking them off to the side.

"If you're not lying, and this is just locker room talk, let me fix whatever's wrong."

The thought of you faking an orgasm truly did upset him, and as much as he hides behind his male bravado, there's something incredibly intimate about being able to truly release for your partner, no holds barred. A level of trust he's worked hard for, and you so easily revealed to be false.

You opened your mouth to speak, but could only let out a gasp as he quickly had you mount one of his large, muscular thighs, his hands holding you down at your hips. You instinctively ground yourself against him, the friction of your panties rubbing against your clit overwhelming. "Joe, I-" you mumbled against his lips as he pulled you in for another kiss, your fingertips digging into his shoulders as you quickened the pace of your hips, alternating between moving back and forth and in lazy circles as your orgasm built in your core.

"It can't be this, baby", he whispered, taking in your face as it contorted with pleasure, "that doesn't look like the face of someone faking it."

"I promise you, I'm not faking it." You bit out, throwing your head back. You pulled your shirt off over your head, your breasts at eye level with Joe. His nose trailed down your front, nestling between your breasts as he laid wet kisses between them. You were quickly coming undone, frantically moving on top of him. He could feel you getting close, your thighs clenching around his leg. "Get on the bed."

You climbed around Joe, lying on your back as he stood, the towel around his waist falling to his feet. The tip of his cock was bright pink and leaking with pre-cum as it rested against his lower stomach. You were salivating at the thought of feeling him on your tongue, but Joe had other plans for you. You felt the mattress dip as he pressed a knee into the bed, moving to position himself between your legs.

He let out a dark chuckle as he stroked himself, watching you wriggle on the bed uncomfortably, desperate to reach your climax. "Were you lying about this part, baby?" You let out a squeal as he drug the head of his cock through your drenched folds, teasing your entrance before pulling away.

"Joe, please", you begged, very aware of how desperate you sounded. You shifted yourself down towards him, growing impatient. "Joe, what?" At this point he was just enjoying toying with you. "Joe, please stop playing around." You could fake with your words all you wanted, but your body gave you away. You were no actor; there was no faking the shaking legs and the heaving chest.

He moaned out as he sunk deep into you, bottoming out as you adjusted to his size, slowly moving your hips around his pelvis. He leaned over, framing your head with his forearms. "You know, I could never fake this with you." He moved to your throat, grazing his teeth against your skin. At this point you were just cockwarming him as Joe pressed kisses to your jawline.

"Joe, please, move. Fuck me, please." You whined in his ear, digging your nails into his back, but he continued to hold you there with his body weight. There's nothing you can do but submit to him and you want nothing more than for him to ravish you, but you can tell he's holding back.

"The way you feel when I'm so deep inside of you." He slowly pulled out before slamming his hips back into you, all of the breath leaving your chest. "All of this is real. Always has been, always will be." He pulls out again, this time pushing himself to the hilt agonizingly slow, so you feel every inch of him.

The pace he set was relentless, his thrusts audible in the room as you coated his cock with your slick, hurdling toward your orgasm. "Fuck, Joe. Fuck, don't stop", you breathed out, your eyes shut tight. You tried to reach down to pleasure yourself, but Joe pounded so roughly into you, you couldn't focus, the circles around your clit erratic, your moans vibrating in your chest. "I'm- I'm, Joe-" you stuttered, gasping for breath, tears welling in your eyes from the intense pleasure. "I've got you, baby. I've got you", he reassured you, seeing you grasp at the sheets to steady yourself.

He studied your face, looking for the sign that you were close. There it was: you scrunched your face tightly, your nose wiggling as your release washed over you, your cushiony walls clenching down around him. He remembered how cute your orgasming face was the first time he saw it, an innocent juxtaposition to the explicit actions happening below.

"Such a good girl. So good, baby." He praised, as each pulse of your muscles pulled him in deeper, making his hips stutter, warmth pooling in his stomach. He continued to fuck you so you could ride your high as long as possible, but you were overstimulated. Joe nestled his face in the crook of your neck, groans leaving his mouth as he felt you tighten around him, and in within seconds he was cuming inside of you, "Oh, fuck, fuck", he cried out as you milked him for every drop of his release.

You pulled him in tight, cradling his head and drawling lazy circles on his back as you both came down from your high. His pants in your ear made you shiver, a giggle slipping from your lips as his cock grazed against your sensitive bud when he pulled out. He pushed away from the bed, resting on his hands, laying to the side of you. He took his time admiring your perfect body, his fingertips dragging along your sensitive skin, your face blissed out and euphoric.

"You know I'd never lie to you, right?", you stroked his cheek with your thumb as he looked down at you. "I love you, Joe."

"I know. I never should have doubted you." He gave you a small smile as he rested his chin on your chest. "Just no more bedroom talk with the wives. Deal?"

"Deal, baby."

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@wonderlandiswhereitsatyo

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#joe burrow #joey burrow #joey b #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow fanfiction #joe burrow smut #joe burrow imagine #nfl imagine #nfl fanfic #nfl fanfiction #nfl smut

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