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#(i shan't be elaborating at this time)
esdyre · 6 months
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proposing this thought exercise to the friends at the table fandom: describe your gender using friends at the table characters (feel free to elaborate at your leisure)
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ckret2 · 21 days
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In this theoretical scenario you postured a while ago, would Bill help with the transition?
(above screenshot from this post.)
I'm gonna be frank with you I have no idea how a triangle would help a human transition into a hexagon.
Would you know how to help a rhombus transition into a female-in-a-human-way? I'm assuming that a rhombus who wants human-female gender isn't asking to become human species. Species and gender are totally separate.
So, what are our options. The rhombus doesn't wear clothing or makeup. Her biology is completely incompatible with human hormones, estrogen included. Can't even help her learn to walk more femininely, she floats everywhere. Her voice is at a weird pitch that doesn't come across to humans quite so much "androgynous" as it does "somehow outside what humans think gendered voices sound like," so like, I guess you could maybe help her find some vocal training? But since she's an alien that might be a moot point??
What kind of a transition CAN you help with except using her new pronouns and helping her pick a new name?
It's just as impossible the other way around. I'm assuming that Ford deciding he's shape-hexagon gender doesn't mean he's asking to become shape species, so Bill can't even like,, magically poof him into a shape. What's he gonna do for Ford besides maybe help him pick out a name that human vocal cords can't even pronounce.
Having said all that: friendly reminder that the post quoted above was a joke, Ford's gender is not hexagon, and this will never happen.
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chiropteracupola · 9 months
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many thanks to jon @dxppercxdxver for letting me make many contextless nonsensical sharpe statements at him tonight
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mndvx · 11 days
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like dangling keys in front of my face
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salithemage · 7 months
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isn't it neat how tumblr's fixation on time loops is an artistic response to the pandemic
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dykethang · 12 days
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:)
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evilblot · 2 years
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Just finished the RE Village DLC.
I'm.
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formula1neverleft · 2 years
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finally have some time to write tonight..gonna be another felipe one shot bc I am still so unwell about him ✋🏼🧎🏼‍♀️
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zerodaryls · 2 years
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me, eyeing the “cishet” characters in a show i’ve never seen before: alright what flavor of queer are YOU gonna be? 📝👀
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pauls1967moustache · 1 year
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Okay but which Beatles are WWDITS characters? And why is it Paul is Nandor?
john is laszlo bc of his love for silly (cursed) hats and the fact that he just like adopts a guy to be his special friend every now and then.
idk the rest i haven't caught up.
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hartmannyoukaigirl · 4 months
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bangs my head aganist the wall. let the horror stop Please
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silkscream · 3 months
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CHAPTER 8: TERMINAL PARADISE
ੈ✩ gojo satoru x reader, geto suguru x reader
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He likes to braid your hair while you braid Suguru’s. He thinks of bringing the bed from his room into yours, pushing the two twins together to fit the three of you. Looks at you both with puppy eyes.
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ੈ✩ chapter cw/tags: explicit content (18+ mdni) , unprotected sex, high/drunk sex, dubcon, somnophilia, oral sex, threesome, the boys being........ evil?
ੈ✩ wc: 7.7k
ੈ✩ a/n: what's upppPP i'm a little tipsy rn but. here is chapter eight. title from the adrianne lenker song. anyways this chapter is very self-indulgent but as i read it back it makes me like. sad. i shan't elaborate. it's very stupid olympic sex i'll tell u that. belligerent fucking if u will
playlist ✸ read on ao3 ✸ series masterlist
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June, 2009
Heat sticks onto you like a leech. You’ve started to think you’ve become one, what with the dark side of your technique. You walked the halls feeling like a white deer that failed to blend into a thicket.
You latch onto your boys like a leech, too. Fighting for space in the same sky in between the sun and the moon. Suguru likes to tell you you’re the stars in small ways, always a gleam in your eye despite mostly feeling dim. There isn’t much time for moping anymore, Satoru tells you. It’s the summer, after all. 
It’s quiet on Onjuku Beach. Well, quiet enough, save for the occasional splashing and the sound of Satoru’s cackles as he swims underwater and pulls Utahime’s ankle. You hold back laughter, watching her lash out like she usually does, Satoru running away like a little kid.
You take a bite of watermelon, the juice dripping out of the corner of your mouth. When you feel Suguru’s weight on the blanket next to you, you give him a slice. He wipes your mouth with the pad of his finger and tastes it on his tongue. He’d gotten accustomed to grooming you like that. Braiding your hair and sticking petals in it in the spring. Rubbing your shoulders with suntan lotion.
You glance at him afterward, when he’s not looking, grappling with the urge to bite him on the shoulder. You think that maybe Satoru would. You aren’t sure if you have the same privilege.
The afternoon drags on, barely changing the summer sky as the tide stays consistent between you and the moon. Shoko and Utahime had headed back an hour before, leaving Satoru’s head in your lap and Suguru seemingly napping underneath a Murakami novel. 
You’d scrunched your nose up at the sight of it—Norwegian Wood. You’d teased Suguru about it, accusing him of being pretentious with a secret love for hollow female characters. He’d rolled his eyes, tipping back a beer, teasing you for bringing No Longer Human.
“Talk about dysfunctional and sad,” he sneered. 
Satoru’s damp hair isn’t helping the shiver of your thighs, the sheen of your smooth skin now riddled with goosebumps. He’d teased you for taking the time to shave every part of your body before the mission, something you never did. Keeping up your appearance when you didn’t need to for him. Suguru likes a bush, too, you know. 
You flushed when he said that, like your face was on fire.
Being day drunk is fun, you decide. Haziness suits the three of you.
You’re sweltering, to say the least, considering the late afternoon sun is setting in a place that hits you directly. Suguru stirs. You feel his warm breath on the side of your thigh as he rises, rubbing his eyes. 
“You think I tanned unevenly?” he asks, squinting at you.
You shake your head, smiling. He smiles back, yawning just before he snaps the side of your bikini bottom without warning. You wince in surprise, blushing.
“Wanna wake up the prince?”
“But he looks so sweet when he’s asleep,” you sigh. “And so quiet.”
“Real fuckin’ quiet,” Suguru laughs. He pauses as he looks at Satoru, as if skimming his face for something. He flicks his nose with his finger, making Satoru flinch and whine.
“C’mon, Satoru. Up.”
He mumbles something in between a whimper and a slurred mutter, nuzzling his nose into your lap until you feel his hot breath fanning your cunt. He whines even more when you shift, attempting to get to your feet and put on your cover-up when he latches onto your wrists with his hands. 
“We gotta go,” you coo softly. 
He obliges with a pout. Satoru had rented a house with an ocean view for the three of you to stay in, much too luxurious for a mission that would only last a few days. But he had the expendable funds, and he refused to stay in a hostel like you had suggested. 
He continues his petulant attitude, his stride like that of a child on vacation. It did feel like a vacation, if you had to be honest. The curses you’d exorcised the day before were hardly exhausting.
It’s only been three days in Onjuku, but you think that the boys are plotting against you.
It’d started the first day, Thursday, after a few exorcisms and one Special Grade made of tongues that they were able to kill in record time. Satoru had insisted on showing as much skin as possible, citing the heat. He was wearing your favorite shirt of his, unbuttoned to show off his alabaster skin, unblemished by anything at all, not even the hot sun. 
He’d also insisted on dessert for breakfast, pointing out the novelty shops along the coast of the local town with the titillation of a real tourist, as if he hadn’t spent weekends there as a child. That’s how the three of you ended up eating popsicles for breakfast.
He was being annoyingly sly, pinching and prodding at you all morning like a little boy. He’d insisted on mimosas before noon, Suguru oddly going along with his antics at your expense. You’d had popsicles at the beach after. Satoru wouldn’t stop staring at you, blinking through the brain freeze as his mouth went to work on something strawberry-flavored. He was obscene with it, his tongue moving in languid movements, disgusting you but burning your skin at the same time.
His lips were stained bright red for the rest of the afternoon, but it looked so beguiling that it had you distracted for the rest of the day. You knew you could have him — he had never played hard to get — but something would gnaw at you telling you the opposite. Made him like forbidden fruit, deluding you.
For one, he was either missing your signals or feigning oblivion, a game that you willingly became a pawn to. He had always taken up too much space, but now he was tugging at your hair like you were twelve again despite your protests. 
And then, when you were brave enough to sneak a hand on his thigh underneath the dinner table or cuddled a bit closer to him in bed, he did nothing. 
Suguru was less obvious about teasing, which made you feel like you were crazy. 
It started with small grocery runs. Suguru accompanied you after Satoru refused to go on the principle of having enough money to dine out for every meal. It felt domestic to pick vegetables with him. Both times, he’d thrown in a treat or a drink that he knew you would like without asking. He’d praise you after the day’s work in ways that set your guts on fire.
He had also, it seemed, picked up the same habit as Satoru of tugging your hair to get your attention. There had been fleeting touches to your waist, too, when he would simply be passing by you after you were done showering. Absent-mindedly, as light as an apparition. Shifting bodies as casually as two people passing in a crowded bar, yet it felt like a car crash to you.
He’d continue that for the second day. Even yesterday, when you had been using the outdoor shower to rinse off after the beach, Suguru had walked in with a drink to offer. Despite still being in your bathing suit, you had felt scandalized by his gaze alone. 
Now, on Saturday evening, you’re alone with him in the beach house while Satoru attends a meeting in Shinjuku against his will. 
Suguru lays on the couch lazily, his tongue jutting out to lick the side of a joint in between tea-flavored papers. You walk into the living room with a yawn, having just woken up from a short nap after reading on the porch. At twilight, the sky flushes pink and purple above the horizon. 
You think about what to eat for dinner, thinking about the prospect of cooking with Suguru alone, which should come as a wholesome, harmless daydream, but truthfully makes your face warm. There are plenty of restaurants down the street, some that even delivered, you recall from a brochure left on the counter. You were intrigued by a seafood restaurant that Satoru had promised to take you to—
“Want a hit?” Suguru’s voice interrupts your ruminating.
“Oh,” you blink. “Um, sure.”
He chuckles as you join him on the couch as if he can read your mind. “It’s like Shoko’s cigarettes, I promise.”
“I know,” you frown, pouting. “I’ve smoked weed before.”
“Last time we passed a blunt around, you kept talking about how it’s against the law.”
“It is!” you mumble, shrugging.
“Yes,” Suguru grins. “And we’re sorcerers that wield magic and kill monsters.”
You roll your eyes, taking the joint from his fingers. He hands you a Zippo, the very one that you had gifted to Shoko months before. You’d have to remember to pocket it afterward to give back to her. 
Suguru chuckles when you take a hit and inevitably cough. When he takes it back, he huffs and exhales a cloud towards your face, grinning with ivory teeth as his Adam’s apple rolls back. You can’t help but fixate your gaze on it.
He taps your knees in a rhythmic pattern with his fingers when you take the next hit. Already, your vision is vignetted with hazy white, but every movement between the two of you feels incredibly sharp, as if you’re wielding the Six Eyes in a dream. Your mouth feels dry, your lips bitten down by your teeth. 
Suguru had been too lazy to change after the beach, barely in the mood to shower until the dampness of his swim trunks had gotten to him. He’d changed to another pair of shorts, the inseam short enough to allow exposure of his tanned thighs, and not bothering with a shirt because of the humidity. Even this close to him, he still smells like sea salt. His long hair was slightly textured, naturally tousled by the ocean.
You sink into the couch, sighing. You feel as though you're overheating. Despite this, Suguru is next to you, thigh to thigh, the spot in between you burning. 
His lips feel chapped, his tongue dry from cotton mouth. He thinks about sticking it down your throat.
The radio that comes with the house is old as shit, something inexplicably adorable enough to be in a vintage shop but not practical enough to own considering it would buzz every few minutes. The signal is weak, crackling as Tatsuro Yamashita plays at a low volume. 
Suguru throws his legs over your lap as he inhales, passing the joint to you but not releasing it. Instead, he merely holds it to your mouth himself, lighting it with Shoko’s Zippo.
Normally, you’d shake yourself after a session, splash your face with cold water before you would start imagining things. You were addicted to the feeling of his fingertips, the sensation exacerbated by your high. The last time you were like this, you’d pictured Suguru’s mouth on your cunt, the image bombarding your mind throughout the night. You numbed the urge with alcohol, still taking bong rips until you threw up in Shoko’s trash can.
You don’t think you’re hallucinating this time. His fox eyes point at you and descend down your face and jaw. 
“No more,” he says.
“Why not?” you whine.
“Your eyes are glazing over,” Suguru chuckles. “So fucking gone.”
“I'm not,” you sigh, pushing his legs off of you and leaning into his shoulder. 
He welcomes you with open arms, allowing you to lay your head on his chest. He smells like his sunscreen, coconut from his fragrance, salt from his body. His skin is incredibly warm too, but so is your entire body, particularly your chest. You can feel your heart beating. You can feel his palm on your thigh. Scorching.
So touchy with you. You wonder if he’s high on anything else. Maybe that was why he was so affectionate today.
Suguru stretches his legs across the couch, your body like a doll’s in between his thighs. He cracks open the can of beer beside him—when had he gotten up to get one?
It’s more humid at night. Or maybe it was the slick of his skin. Either way, you think your hair must be matted with sweat, a messy braid loosening at the back of your head. Strands spin in between Suguru’s fingers like loose threads of a sweater.
“You’re excited.”
“What?” you squeak out, surprised. His voice interrupts a miasma of inebriated thought loops, dripping desire bombarding the forefront of your mind. 
“Your heart’s beating fast,” he observes. “And you get real horny when you're high.”
"I don't—”
"Don't think Shoko and I don't notice Satoru stealing you away when we smoke," he laughs.
His fingers curl around your jaw, lowering to feel the quickening pulse of the right side of your neck. You’d surely smell like him by the time you shower tonight. Coconut and sea salt and beer.
You shake your head.
Suguru had been at a deficit with you for the past six months. He would dream about your cunt sometimes, the sight of you on New Year’s permanently etched into his brain. He and Satoru still looked at the same magazines they’d collected in adolescence, spilling ropes of white to the same pages that had always gotten him going, but you were still more prominent in his head.
He would think of your mouth parting from the sensation of his fingers pushing through the slick of your pussy. Your tongue exploring the underside of his neck.
Satoru has been overly possessive ever since the school year started. Suguru had started to believe that he would never have you again and that he should accept it. He didn't feel particularly entitled to you. The Six-eyed sorcerer had his claim on you since he was a child, anyway—Suguru would learn to get over it.
But now, here you are, in his lap. Your breath quickens at the feeling of his hand on your thigh. Suguru could bet that you were soaking through your panties, perhaps from the moment you found yourself alone with him.
Lately, Suguru wants you more than he wants Satoru.
He loved Satoru so much, more than he thought he was ever capable of since he’d met him at fifteen, but he constantly dreams of the softness of your skin instead. He liked that you were pliant, desperate. It’d be easy to coax a reaction out of you, letting him in the crux of your thighs with just the tiniest amount of teasing. Suguru knew that you would say yes to him as eagerly as you would to Satoru, your mouth already watering. It made him feel insane.
Your cheeks heat up when you feel his dick hardening beneath you. Prodding at the small of your back, the only thing separating you is a thin piece of nylon. 
“Aw,” he purrs. “You have a freckle right here.”
“Do I?” you breathe, your eyes lowering down to where Suguru’s finger strokes the inside of your thigh, the tip of it caressing a dot of dark brown. So tiny that you hadn’t even noticed it yourself. 
“S’cute,” he whispers. You shiver, then. His hot breath all over your neck is intoxicating. When his fingers skim your collarbone, he notices it’s hot to the touch, your pulse twitching the same as it does when he’d called you princess. 
You swallow thickly, turning to face him in his lap. He says your name with a heaviness that has your heart sinking to your feet.
“Can I kiss you?”
You don’t answer, merely turning your head to melt into him. High out of your mind.
He’s careful with you. His lips are soft despite being a bit chapped, his aftershave prominent in the air with notes of sandalwood. There’s intent to it, something you didn’t often feel with Satoru over the past few weeks. 
Your hands cup his jaw almost immediately, while his own hands cup the flesh of your thighs. They slide up to squeeze your ass, which forces a mewl out of your mouth. 
He didn’t think his cock could get any harder, wanting to burst from his shorts. It hurt.
“You’re so warm. You got a fever or something?”
“No,” you breathe.
“Your skin is burning. Wanna take this off?” he grins. A shark smile. His fingers skim the hem of your dress.
You do it without him begging. He doesn’t even have to convince you — you’re peeling it off, exhaling at the feeling of the thick air around you. Even with the slip of fabric off, you still feel so fucking warm against him.
You yelp when he grabs your breast, squeezing it along with his tongue on your nipple.
“Suguru—”
Your whine falls flat. You don't remember if you were meaning to scold him or to beg for more. He smiles with his forehead pressed to yours, his hands smoothing up and down the skin of your sides.
“Pretty,” he muses. 
“Pretty,” you repeat. He’s beautiful underneath you. 
A beat passes. You don't know who closes the distance first.
It’s a gnash of limbs, of lips, of teeth. Devouring each other. The weed made you so fucking wet, dripping into his lap through your panties. He doesn’t bother with them, pulling them to the side to fuck into you without a warning. You don’t even recall him taking out his dick.
The feeling of him makes you want to cry.
He groans at the bulge of your lower stomach, his cock carving out the gooey parts of you for him to nest in. The flush of your cheeks makes you look like a flower. Your cunt blooming for him, hot and tight.
You feel like you’re being split apart, like the skin of a mandarin orange unfurling beneath his hands.
“You’re so fucking wet,” he sighs, gaining control of his voice. Humming instead of growling, like he’s sinking into a warm bath.
You think it would burn if you weren’t so wet, his girth thicker than Satoru’s. 
He holds you by the hips, thrusting into you at a slow pace, breaking you open. Making a mess of your insides. 
“Does Satoru fuck you this good?” he grins.
You’re too breathless to reply. As if you even could, your face feverish at his taunting. You didn’t think you could survive a grip harder than Satoru’s, but despite Suguru’s gentle demeanor, his hands on you are brutish. 
You kiss him, licking up the taste of beer and weed, slightly herbal from the papers. He moans into your mouth when you grip his hair. It’s soft in between your fingers. Like real silk. 
Suguru had dreamt about this for months.
“You look so pretty,” he grunts, teeth bared. “Fuck. Thought about this for so long.”
You whine at his admission. His cock is impossibly deep inside you, coupled with the sensation of your limbs melting like boiled sugar. You roll your hips, cunt spasming around him already. Your nails make crescent-shaped marks on the meat of his broad shoulders, mirroring the same ones that he had made from gripping your waist.
Suguru’s hand holds the crux of your neck, tipping your face upward to look at him dead in the eye. Everything in your body is cloying heat, making it difficult to keep your eyes wide open, but he forces it from you with deeper thrusts. His fingers coax your mouth open for you to suck on, making you whimper, making you choke on his digits. 
There’s a flash in Suguru’s eyes, the smallest gleam that you had recognized in Satoru. Something predatory.
“Knew you’d be a good girl,” he whispers in your ear. “You think about me like this, don’t you?”
“Yes,” you whimper.
He pulls back, leaning back on the couch to let you have your rut, your pace eager like a starved puppy. Part of him wanted to mark you up just to piss Satoru off, though he knew the bastard would probably like it anyway. 
“How do you think about me?”
“I—Suguru—”
“Tell me,” he teases, his smile serpentine. He pulls out to flip you over, your tits pressed against the arm of the couch. “Like this? Pulling your hair?”
"I think about your mouth. About your cock inside me," you say. Mindless. Under his spell.
The stretch from behind feels somehow deeper than before. He groans at the way your back arches, your hair in his fist. Your knees are already chafing from the leather beneath you, the back of your thighs burning from slapping against his skin.
“Close,” you choke out.
“Yeah,” he sighs, biting your shoulder. “Cum on my cock, princess.”
You could pass out like this, you think. Your vision is already spotty, air stolen out of your lungs from the brevity of his movements. Your mouth hangs, wide open and slack as a pitchy moan rolls out.
Suguru follows soon after you — he can’t help it when you sound like that. He’s addicted. Desperate to live inside you like this, high in every earthly sense. He has half a mind to pull out before he spills, but he can’t pry himself from you.
Still dizzy, you lay on him while he cleans up the mess in between your thighs, his cum nearly leaking onto the couch. You’re surprised when he grabs the back of your neck to kiss you again. Neither of you keep track of how much time passes as you make out like teenagers. You feel almost faint in his arms.
“Fuck, you’re still high as shit, aren’t you?” Suguru says, squishing your face in between his hands. He slides his dick back into his shorts, light soiled from precum. If he hadn’t put them on again, he probably would’ve been too tempted for another round. Even with your hand palming him while you made out, you were clearly in another dimension.
Looking at him makes you feel raw. Like letting him fuck you was the same as volunteering your heart on a pulpit.
“Dinner.” It feels strange to use your voice. Swapping spit with Suguru wasn’t doing much for hydration.
“Yes,” he chuckles. “Want to go to that restaurant?”
“Mm,” you whine, slinging an arm around his neck. “Let’s do takeout.”
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Satoru manages to slip back late at night, long past the time you and Suguru had fallen asleep on the couch with the television on. He smirks at the sight, hovering over the two of you like the Grim Reaper. Suguru would surely snap at him if he was awake, but for now, the Six Eyes examine every contour of each of your bodies fit together like clasped palms. 
The room smells like sex. Or maybe Satoru is projecting, his jaw only now relaxing after keeping his teeth so gritted during that stupid fucking meeting with the higher-ups. He kept thinking about you, distracted by the sight of you at the beach, your bare legs splayed out on the sand. 
Suguru probably got to you first. Of course, he would. It makes Satoru bite his cheek, but it also makes the butterflies in his stomach feel like daggers.
He stills when he hears you hum, mumbling something unintelligible as you bury yourself in Suguru’s chest. It’s so soft, so innocent, yet Satoru has to excuse himself to your shared room so he can wrap his hand around his cock.
He thinks about your mouth when he’s close and decides not to finish. He’d rather feel you against him instead, skin to skin.
The sound of you mewling in your sleep is adorable to him — you do so in his arms as he lifts you bridal style, prying your body from Suguru’s grasp. When he puts you down in the bed, you look angelic.
Satoru rubs your thigh, prying your legs apart gently so he can suck kisses into the skin. You twitch, your breath heavy. Indulging in your dreams while Satoru indulges in his. 
You squirm, stirring when you feel his tongue in your cunt. You’re already so wet for him, pliable and ripe for him even in your sleep. He tastes salt, the aftermath of his best friend’s release, and he laughs.
“Satoru,” you mumble, your voice still in a dream-like haze.
“I’m right here, baby,” he murmurs, licking a stripe from your clit to your belly button. “Missed me?”
“Mm.”
The air is thick with tension as he rises to slot his body behind yours. Satoru pumps his cock once before he slides into you without much warning. Despite being wet, your cunt burns.
“Sator—” He covers your mouth. 
“So fucking tight,” he groans. “Thought Sugu would’ve loosened you up, huh?”
“Hurts,” you whimper. 
“Take it,” he sighs. “Take it for me.”
His teeth on your shoulder make you dizzy. You still feel like you’re dreaming, but the stretch he has in between your walls makes it all too real. Satoru knows he doesn’t deserve you like this, but he’d decided the moment he stepped into the house that he would be selfish tonight. 
He fucks you like he’s starved. 
Even in the wine-dark night, he senses his best friend all over you with his Six Eyes. You’re covered in him. 
You pant into his palm until he descends his hand to your throat, pulling you taut against him so that your back arches. He doesn’t bother with making you cum, mostly circling your clit to get you wetter. Inside you, he feels boneless, washed away of his irritation. 
“Fuck,” he grunts. “Oh, fuck. ‘m sorry, baby.”
“Too much,” you whine.
He shoves his fingers into your mouth the same way Suguru had done hours before.
With a mean cant of the hips, you can feel his body slacken after warmth fills up your cunt. Your voice is high and needy on the comedown. You taste blood in your mouth from biting down on your lip too hard, chapped from all the kissing of today. 
“Love you,” he mumbles, his mouth on the nape of your neck.
He falls asleep soon after, leaving you with your thoughts, still half-drunk on him, barely lucid. It makes you sick, the way you want him, the way you let him use you. But you liked it. You liked his violence and possessiveness as if his actions were love letters.
Satoru had you weaned on something so saccharine that you stopped caring about the possibility of it spoiling. You welcomed the rot anyway. You had your own to wield with your bare hands.
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August, 2009
You dream about them sometimes. You were shocked that the boys didn’t have any more games to play with you during that weekend, the two of them collectively ignoring the smell of sex in the air and the casual touches. They still touched you in their own ways. Reminding you of yourself. Your role as a toy.
Sometimes, you dream about them together with you as the voyeur. You’d see their broad backs, sweat pooling into a navel. Tongue-kissing. They were both too large to fit on the dorm bed together, you’d imagine. 
Satoru gets clingier. If that was even possible. He sleeps in your room instead of his more often now, leaving his clothes tucked messily in your bottom drawer. It’s almost domestic, the way he starts sweeping the floor like it’s a shared house, the way his toothbrush kisses yours in the chipped mug on the bathroom sink.
Even when he's not physically in your room, his presence always lingers. The amount of belongings left behind that are Satoru's continues to increase. Video games he forces you to play with him. Manga piled up on the corner of your desk.
He likes to braid your hair while you braid Suguru’s. He thinks of bringing the bed from his room into yours, pushing the two twins together to fit the three of you. Looks at you both with puppy eyes.
It’s during this time that you realize how touch-starved Satoru must’ve been as a child. He had clung to you then, too—always playing too rough, always finding a part of you to hold whether it had been your hand or your braids to pull. From an early age, he’d always needed that relief. Something to sink his teeth in fully.
He’s more than willing to wear his heart on his sleeve for you, which you find endlessly amusing. It makes him dopey, almost stupid in his affection for you. You’d consider yourself a girlfriend if either of you would say it out loud. Neither of you do.
Suguru likes to sneak up on you in small ways that evade Satoru’s watchful eyes. Like the times he sleeps in your dorm when Satoru is busy on a mission. Suguru will indulge your interest in movies that are more cerebral—psychological thrillers and slow cinema. Satoru doesn’t have the patience for it, always opting for a slasher horror or an action film. Suguru likes to be quiet with you in these instances. Likes to stroke your hair when you rest your head in his lap. Likes to fall asleep in your tiny bed, his larger body engulfing yours.
You’re being shared between them, though you aren’t sure of the conditions. You don’t have the guts to ask. You don’t even notice a significant change. Being attuned to the boys in physical and emotional ways is almost second nature to you, now.
Between July and August, the three of you are a set. 
A crowded bed. Weed-induced makeouts. Someone’s hand snapping the waistband of your shorts and slinking downwards. Sometimes, you can’t distinguish their touches. You don’t care to.
August is golden light waking you from sweet slumber. August is liquid gold in the sky reflecting on smooth skin. Bare knees hanging from rooftops. 
The summer loosens you up, much to Satoru’s delight. Enough to convince you to be more social, at least.
One night, your dorm is crowded—Shoko supplies the weed and Utahime supplies the alcohol.
Strip poker again. A unanimous decision because the school had poor ventilation and there were too many of you for your single box fan to air out the room. Shoko calls the game off knowingly—Satoru’s making his eyes at you again, drunk and high off his ass while you’re occupied with conversation. Any more clothing items stripped off and the rest of them would be kicked out of the room. 
You all settle on a movie drinking game, then. Something stupid, something American that Yuki picks out. You think it’s funny that she hangs out given her anarchist values on sorcery.
Satoru is, of course, annoyingly clingy and annoyingly cute. Hogging up all your attention the second you lean into Suguru in the slightest bit. You almost want to scold him, maybe spray him with a bottle like he’s a cat.
He doesn’t bother to put his clothes back on—not all of them, at least. He leaves his shorts on, though you think they must be a size too small given the inseam. You’re still clad in shorts and a crop top, giving Satoru any excuse to touch any expanse of skin between your hips and ribcage despite the number of times you complain about being too warm.
The girls get too drunk too fast. Yuki falls asleep in Suguru’s lap while Shoko and Utahime end up making out without caring about who’s looking. 
The minute the three of them are out your door, Satoru’s lips are on yours. Teeth adamant on biting into the flesh of your bottom lip like a predator. He tastes like strawberries this time. You can barely keep up before you register that Suguru is behind you, laughing, cursed energy flickering.
Despite everyone’s departure, the room feels smaller. 
Satoru has never been so eager to show off like this, believe it or not. He usually waits until the two of you are alone, though your reaction time is always too slow and the flippant speed that he takes you the millisecond you get privacy together is always too fast.
Maybe sometimes, Suguru would be asleep nearby while Satoru would tease you to sleep, but he’d never be a part of it. Certainly not in the same room.
So it has you deeply flustered now, just like it had been those many months ago in the late hours of New Year’s Day. Rushed and torrid. Two pairs of snake eyes on you. Getting torn apart by two sets of hands.
It seems that your suspicions on that beach weekend were correct.
Satoru’s been bringing up Suguru when he fucks you lately, asking you if you think his other half is more attractive. If you’re thinking about Suguru while he’s inside of you. 
Of course, you don’t answer—you never do. But Suguru seems to be in on it, given the amount of times he bumps into you, the way he’s started to call you Twigs. He seems to be everywhere, all the time, the exact second Satoru isn’t around. Like a scab that won’t heal. 
He buys you lunch often, likes to treat you after studying the more practical parts of Jujutsu. Plays with your hair absentmindedly just like Satoru does.
He’s doing it now, making your scalp tingle as he presses his mouth gently at the nape of your neck—a stark contrast to Satoru’s tongue in your mouth. 
“You gonna let Suguru watch, baby?” Satoru mumbles against your jaw, his breath hot. “Or d’you want him to join?”
You nod dumbly, barely aware of yourself. It’s how Suguru manages to get your shorts off so swiftly. His hands caress your shoulder blades with palms outstretched underneath your shirt. Your own pair of wings. 
It’s too easy—like picking apart petals off a rose. Rough as the boys are, they don’t need to be. You’d fold over for them without much convincing. You can tell how much they love that about you, how Satoru probably whispers about it to Suguru in between classes when you aren’t watching.
So sensitive every time I touch her. Like it’s her first time all over again.
“Suguru,” you whine. “Kiss me.”
He laughs and looks at you like a shiny new toy. Precious. Suguru is somehow more boyish when he’s high, his cat-like smile as lazy as his slurred movements. He’s always graceful despite the posture problem he shares with Satoru. When he smokes, there’s a lightness within him. Rolls off the shoulders like water falling.
He’s perfect.
Satoru preps your cunt with his mouth. You cry out immediately, feeling the vibration of him beneath you. It was good that they cut you off from the joint considering how many beers you and Utahime were passing back and forth. You’re light enough now to feel every lick and suck so acutely, Satoru’s mouth making a mess of you. 
Suguru works on your neck, then takes your nipple in his mouth. You swallow a moan. Kitten licks from both of them and you’re already convulsing.
“Think you broke a record, princess,” Suguru grins.
“Best girl,” Satoru sighs, biting into the meat of your thigh. 
“C’mere. Let me taste her.”
You expect Satoru to huff in protest or move out of the way, but he doesn’t. He leans over your body and presses his mouth to Suguru’s, licking into it obscenely with a small groan. Your eyes widen with fascination, cheeks blooming.
“How is she?” Satoru smirks.
“Perfect. Just like always.”
You whimper in response. They both smile at you; God and the devil. You swear their faces blur into each other.
“That turn you on, baby?”
“She’s so cute,” Suguru muses. “All fucked out already.”
Something divine awakens in your blood. You want to indulge in them, be their pet. It’s like your brain is melting into a pool of desire, dripping out of you. You blink slowly, feeling a pressure in your stomach that bleeds of desperation.
“Want you both,” you pant. Your lashes flutter when Suguru feels the slippery plushness of your walls with his fingers. “Fuck, want it so bad. Need it.”
“So fucking wet, holy shit,” he groans. “All this for me?”
“You?” Satoru frowns. “I’m the one who made her cum.”
“And I’ll make her cum on my cock.”
“Dude—”
“You need to learn how to share, Satoru,” Suguru chuckles. His fingers are incessantly scissoring into you, yet the two of them bicker as if you aren’t there. “You owe me for getting us in trouble last week.”
“Oh, so it’s my fault that we both forgot to put up a veil—”
“Shut him up, will you, sweetheart?” Suguru interjects. “Shit, he’s hard as a rock.”
You whine when Suguru removes his fingers, but he’s quick to fuck into you. It’s whiplash, the stretch of him. Satoru rolls his eyes and leans in to cup your face with his hand, kissing you while his other hand pumps up and down his cock.
“Oh,” you gasp.”S-Suguru…”
“Does it hurt, pretty?”
“N-no. Feels too good.”
“Feels better than Satoru? Yeah?” he sneers.
Satoru glares at him, exhaling a groan in between annoyance and desperation as he palms himself. 
“You know, I was gonna fuck her face but now I think that’s your job.”
“I’ll fuck you after, relax,” Suguru chides. “I wanna kiss her.”
He leans down. His messy bun has fallen out of its scrunchie — it’s one of yours. Even when he has his usual hairstyle, he keeps it around his wrist sometimes. Now, his hair tickles your face as he kisses you, hand to your throat to hold you in place while your hips quiver at the sheer girth of him. 
“Satoru, c’mere,” you whimper.
He kisses you deeply before kneeling in front of you, his cock hovering over your face. You take him in your mouth, the flushed skin of his dick tight and throbbing underneath your tongue. You like the way he groans and pulls your hair, mirroring the way you were just pulling on Suguru’s hair when his face was buried in your neck. 
“Holy fuck,” Satoru moans. His thighs twitch. Suguru’s right – you look fucked out, eyes rolling backward. Must be the drugs. Then again, Suguru’s hitting every sensitive spot inside of you at a relentless pace.
“Such a good mouth, Twigs.”
If you weren’t getting fucked, you would’ve cringed at that. You hate when Satoru calls you that in bed. 
“Good cunt, too,” Suguru rasps. “Perfect cunt. Fuck, do you feel that, baby? Feel me up to your stomach?”
You moan around Satoru’s cock.
Satoru’s eyes are blown wide, a drop of blue expanding against the stark white of his sclera. He used to dream about this. His two favorite people in the world. It had occurred to him just then how much he wanted you both in the back of his mind. Wanted to consume you both in one bite.
He pulls out of your mouth, stroking his cock slowly as he watches. 
You whine something unintelligible. Begging, mumbling. “Faster.”
“Any faster and I’ll cum, baby,” Suguru groans. 
“Don’t cum inside her,” Satoru warns. “I’m still pissed at you for the last time.”
Suguru merely laughs. “Come over here and open your mouth then, pretty boy.”
His thrusts are getting sloppier but rougher. The impact of him is dizzying, the hand he has wrapped around your throat making you lightheaded. You can only stare with a parted mouth, fascinated by the succulent pink of his lips as he focuses on making you cum. You’re too out of breath to even tell him when it happens. 
It turns you inside out. Liquefying your body like treacle.
“You’re so cute when you cum, baby,” Satoru coos, squeezing your breast.
“Fuck, fuck, Satoru, c’mere,” Suguru slurs. He pulls out of you then, pumping himself over Satoru’s tongue until his cum spills onto it. He swallows and scrunches his nose.
“Battery acid.”
Suguru laughs, then looks back at you. “You’ll have to weigh in on who tastes better, princess.”
“My turn,” Satoru grins, his eyes a bit feral. 
You yelp when he manhandles you and gets you into his lap. He starts marking you up. Bites you a little too hard as if he’s trying to wake you up. When he thrusts into your cunt, you gasp, feeling him all the way into your guts. You spasm around him, still sensitive from Suguru.
He holds your hips and fucks into you at a steady pace while Suguru comes to caress your back, licking over your shoulder blades. 
“Satoru, you’re going to make her look like a domestic violence victim with the marks you’re making.”
“She likes it,” Satoru pouts.
“Fuck, ‘m hard again,” Suguru groans. “Lay her down.”
“No, I want her like this.”
“Too fucking bad, I want you like this.” Suguru pulls at you until your back hits the mattress and Satoru rolls his eyes, gripping your hips with bruising force as he drapes your legs over his shoulders. 
Suguru bites Satoru’s neck, peppering it with kisses. Watching them in front of you is tantalizing, makes you clench around Satoru harder. 
“Shit, you like that, baby? You like looking at us?” Satoru moans.
“Y-yes.”
Suguru spits in his hand as he preps Satoru from behind. It’s minimal, given how impatient he is. He reaches over to your bedside table, fumbling with a bottle of lube. It doesn’t take long until his cock fills Satoru to the brim. 
“Jesus.”
“Shut up and take it.”
Satoru feels too hot, too full. The feeling of Suguru’s cock in his ass inadvertently makes him bury himself even deeper into you, and he’s already on the brink. Suguru reaches over Satoru’s body to press a thumb to your aching clit until you cum with a strangled cry. 
The boys try to time their stuttering hips at a similar rhythm, but Satoru feels like he’s losing his mind. Caught up in between both of you, melting, barely lucid. Eyes squeezed shut with his mouth falling open. 
“Tell me you love me.”
You blink at him, wondering who he’s asking. The flush in his cheeks makes him look exhausted, spent. Drunk over the bacchanalian mess of it all.
“Love you, Satoru,” you whimper anyway. “I love you.”
He moans at that. Gasps when he feels the stretch of his hole split open on Suguru’s cock.
You watch with tears in your eyes, overstimulated from your orgasm. Over Satoru’s shoulder, Suguru locks eyes with you and smirks, not letting up eye contact nor the stimulation of your clit with his fingers. He doesn’t care that you’re convulsing underneath them, doesn’t care that hot tears are streaming down your face. He always thought you looked beautiful when you cried. It’s sick of him, maybe, but he wants to be the one to make you do it, even when it’s not his cock inside of you.
“Shit— Sugu—”
Satoru hits his peak, filling you with his cum when Suguru hits the perfect spot inside him. He’s whimpering. His eyes are glassy.
“Fucking shit, you’re tight,” Suguru mutters. “Gonna cum.”
“Not inside,” Satoru whines.
“You’re a fucking brat,” Suguru chuckles. 
Of course, Suguru disobeys, cumming inside Satoru with a guttural groan. Once he pulls out, Satoru collapses on top of your body, face buried in your hair.
You whine. You’re overheated, smothered. Your body feels as though it’s been rearranged multiple times like malleable clay in each of their hands. It’s a miracle that Satoru pulls his dick out of you at all.
“The hell was that?” he asks Suguru, out of breath. Suguru simply smiles, ignoring him.
“Let’s run her a bath. Poor baby looks like she’s gonna pass out.”
He’s right, admittedly. You aren’t even sure if you could get up if you wanted to, which is why Satoru scoops you in his arms. 
“We can’t all fit in the tub,” you mumble.
Satoru laughs. “Yes, we can. But fine, we’ll just shower after you.”
The two of them handle you like glass. The swapping of washcloths and soap bottles makes the ordeal ritualistic. Suguru runs his fingers through your wet hair while Satoru lifts one of your legs to scrub. 
“Little princess,” Suguru says.
“You guys treat me like a pet.”
The two of them exchange a glance. Unreadable. But there’s something of a knowing smile in Satoru’s expression.
“You’re just precious s’all. Perfect girl.”
You sigh, sinking into the water. Something turns over in your stomach, but you’re soothed by the sound of Suguru lightly humming behind you. They’re gentle with you. It’s ironic.’
Suguru kneads your spine and presses kisses to your wet skin. The smell of sex dissipates and the scent of Suguru’s shampoo wafts under your nose instead—he’d left it in your bathroom one weekend when Satoru was out on a mission. You have a suspicion he did it on purpose to get a rise out of Satoru or to make you smell like him. You didn’t mind either way. 
Every touch feels blistering as much as it feels soothing, somehow. White-hot, too noticeable, yet the feeling of their hands lets you exhale. Maybe it was the sex. You couldn’t even really look Satoru in the eye, not really. Something in the face was constantly changing, as if he was slowly transforming whenever you were joined together in ways that were beyond you.
He’d gotten rougher. Meaner in the hips, even if his kisses were meant to cherish. He’d get too eager. He always was, to be fair, but it’s been ferocious from him. Bruising your hips with the force of his hands, handprints adorning your ass. It would be Suguru to pick up the pieces, to soothe you with sweet nothings despite his cock splitting you open. It was only a few times since the beach trip, but it was as if they planned it together.
You realize this now in your post-sex haze. Steam in the air as heavy as your lids. They wanted to take care of you so badly. They just had to ruin you a little beforehand.
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bowtiepastabitch · 7 months
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Let's talk costuming: Angelic Robes and The Unreliable Narrator
It's two am, I have to be up at six, but this has been fermenting in the back of my head for the past five hours I've spent doing homework and if I don't get it out I shan't sleep.
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The costumes we see representing angelic character in Season Two are VASTLY different from those we see in Season One. (See my post on Aziraphale's Job Robe for an in-depth art history analysis of this individual costume piece.) In season one, the angelic flashback clothing we see is rather humble and uncomplicated. As all things in this show, this serves a very important narrative purpose.
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Let's first compare these gorgeous gorgeous girls to their S1 counterparts, shall we?
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Just look at the collar on that robe! In S1, we're introduced to Aziraphale in a very plain tunic-style robe with an unfinished neckline. Aside from a slight gold decoration and draping on the shoulders, this could easily be mistaken for rather primitive human garb. S2, by comparison, introduces angelic costume as non-ostentatious but still refined with a gold-trimmed gathered neckline and wide sleeves. The fabric itself, on a textile level, is much finer and softer. Overall, the robes give an air of innocence and angelic purity that is lacking from Aziraphale's S1 'fit. Let's look at another example:
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Their Rome costumes are strewn with so many incredible details (check out this incredible post from 2019) but they still retain a bit of that historical ruggedness. Same for these:
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The argument could be made for pure historical compliance, sure, but to claim a lack of anachronisms in this show would be a flat-out lie. No, S1 Crowley and Aziraphale are very distinctively human in their dress. The cloth has a wider weave, the ornamentation is minimal, all around it serves to highlight their fitting-in with humans and the humanization of their characters. They're 'going native,' as it were, no doubt about it.
So why, in S2, is Aziraphale suddenly showing up looking like he just popped out of a renaissance painter's wet dream?
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Simple. Suddenly, Aziraphale isn't an angel among humans acting human, he's an angel being an angel doing angel things. We get to see the rest of the heaven gang in full angelic decadence as well, a bold departure from the starkness of 'modern' heaven. If this is, as many of you lovely folk have speculated, a series of flashbacks from Aziraphale's memory, the design choices designate very clearly Aziraphale's perception of himself as an angel. A perception which, mind you, would likely be influenced by later human ideas of angelic and heavenly aesthetics. As an unreliable narrator, Aziraphale is showing us not his actual wardrobe as an angelic being but his perception of his past self.
Crowley, too, is affected by this shift in dress. Bildad the Shuhite is everything S1 flashback Crowley is not: fashion-forward, smooth-talking, and impeccably well-dressed. We've got three different fabric textures (that's three times as many as any of his biblical S1 robing) and a definable silhouette. He's practically a fashionista.
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If this were all taken as an objective narrative, the shift back to billowing-void peasant Crowley at Golgotha, where we next see her chronologically, would be strange to say the least.
So why is the costuming of the S2 pre-modern flashbacks so much more elaborate? There's three possibilities I can imagine for a change in costume design for any show:
Budget: this is highly unlikely an instant rule-out for me. I've seen what costumers can do on a shoestring budget, and besides the later period costumes make this demonstrably false.
Change in production design team: Technically possible, yes, but if there's one thing Good Omens does well between seasons it's continuity. I mean, they burned the fucking bookshop and then hand-painted tiles to recreate it exactly for the second season. This is not Harry Potter. This isn't it.
An intentional design: Everything, and I mean everything, in this show is intentional. While not everything the wardrobe team does is easily decodable (see Crowley's shapeshifting sunglasses) we've got a pretty comfortable bit of time to figure such things out. This is the only option that makes a lick of sense.
Wonderful, so we've established that this is a narrative choice.
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So if it's a narrative choice, and it's distinct from the stylistic choices of Season One, then someone is lying to us. Or rather, we have an unreliable narrator somewhere along the way.
Most of the buzz on ye olde tumblr focuses on the idea of Aziraphale as narrator and memory-holder for S2, and that would certainly make sense from both a story and design. Of course he would see Angel Crowley as adorable and innocent and angelic (the hair is not helping his case either omg I love her), and of course he would see himself as grandly, exaggeratedly, almost dissonantly angelic at the major turning point in his faith.
If Crowley is narrating, then it calls into question why he would choose to remember himself this way. It holds a sort of nostalgic sadness, a memory of a joyful innocence permanently lost to God's cruelty. When we see Aziraphale in angelic splendor later, we're reminded again of what Crowley has lost. It echoes the aesthetic of his former angel self, the gathering and gold trim and bright white fabric, but also introduces a much more elaborate silhouette that reflects the shift toward heaven's new high-and-mighty attitude.
Finally, I'd like to point out that by contrast Season One focuses heavily on themes of humanity rather than ethereality. Narrated by God, no less, who probably has thoughts on their assimilation. While I think we can assume God to be a more reliable narrator than Crowley or Aziraphale, it's not out of the question that She would have her own story to spin about our Ineffable Idiots' shared history.
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Ultimately, I think it's safe to say that whatever's going on in costume design is a Clue to the story we're being told in S2 and the one we will be told in S3.
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visualtaehyun · 3 months
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Pronouns, my beloved!
Disclaimer: not a native Thai speaker, still learning 🙏
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นี่คุณจะไม่เลือกผมจริง ๆ ใช่ไหม /nee, khun ja mai leuuak pom jing jing chai mai?/
-> คุณ /khun/ = polite, formal 2nd pers. pronoun -> ผม /pom/ = polite, formal, respectful male 1st pers. pronoun
As Mahasamut is the younger one, he might just keep using ผม /pom/ throughout the entire show, just as Sky did in LITA. What he calls Tongrak is surely gonna change though! คุณ /khun/ feels too distant for P'May characters - even LomNuea in Wedding Plan, who met in a professional context and long kept using คุณ /khun/, ended up switching to the more familiar and informal พี่ /phi/ to refer to Lom.
So my predictions include:
a variation on his name, e.g. Rak, instead of any pronoun (like Prapai calling Sky just Sky, no pronouns), or later down the line maybe just ที่รัก /thee rak/ (= lit. beloved, comparable to darling, honey etc.) as it's sweet and would be a lovely switcheroo from Tongrak ต้องรัก /dtawng rak/ (= have to love)
a more intimate pronoun like เธอ /ter/ (based on YiwaMarine from Wedding Plan foregoing seniority by having younger Rine call her older girlfriend เธอ /ter/ for most of the show)
or simply พี่ /phi/ (as a 2nd pers. pronoun) which- I was just considering how that might not be sweet enough for a P'May top but then the sheer potential of P'Rak พี่รัก /phi rak/ sounding so close to ที่รัก /thee rak/ occurred to me and now I'm gonna need that to happen!!
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ต่อให้ผู้ชายทั้งโลกเหลือแค่นายคนเดียวอะ ฉัน ก็ ไม่ เอา /dtaaw hai phuu chaai thang lohk leuua khaae naai khohn diiao a- chan. gaaw. mai. ao./)
-> นาย /naai/ = informal male 2nd pers. pronoun (it's kind of filed away as the male equivalent to เธอ /ter/ in my head, even though เธอ /ter/ is perfectly usable regardless of gender but might sound too flirty to Tongrak, maybe?) -> ฉัน /chan/ = informal, familiar 1st pers. pronoun, not respectful or polite but also not impolite; used when speaking to someone younger/of lower status or between equals, is used predominantly by women, and in turn by men when talking to women
I love this choice so much! 1) Because both ฉัน /chan/ and นาย /naai/ rarely make an appearance in BL, from male characters, even though they delight me every time I do hear it in a BL (e.g. NuerSyn in Cutie Pie calling each other นาย /naai/ for a good long while), and 2) because ฉัน /chan/ can give both Mafia Boss (as can นาย /naai/) as well as Sassy and no, I shan't elaborate 5555
My prediction is that these too might change. ฉัน /chan/ here feels like- attitude? almost? Like both a level of self-confidence as well as some sass so I'd wager that mellows out into:
พี่ /phi/ (as a 1st pers. pronoun)
or he might just as well keep using ฉัน /chan/ (if paired with เธอ /ter/ for example that's like prime romance trope right there lol)
or, which I think is most likely, he'll just use his own name or variation thereof, e.g. Rak.
I remember seeing Peat tweet something aaaages ago when the announcement for Love Sea first dropped where he called Fort 'Mut' -
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/diiao juuhr gan loei, ai moot/ = See you then, Ai'Mut!
Except this is spelled differently from Mahasamut's name because หมุด /moot/ (= pin/needle) is the phonemic spelling of the last syllable in มหาสมุทร /ma haa sa moot/. So! I think it's entirely possible that Tongrak's gonna call him Mut หมุด or Nong Mut น้องหมุด in the future.
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คุณต้องรักมหาสมุทร /khun dtawng rak mahaa samoot/
= Khun Tongrak Mahasamut = You have to love the ocean. = You have to love me.
The Thai title is ต้องรักมหาสมุทร /dtawng rak mahaa samoot/ = TongrakMahasamut; Gotta Love the Sea; Gotta Love Mahasamut
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blond-jerk-tourney · 8 months
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Platinum Bracket: Round 1, Poll 15
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Propaganda from submitters Under Cut
Dee Reynolds
She is a menace to everyone she has ever met. She digs holes in her friends' lives for fun. Seeker of pity, pity revenge. Makes men's lives insufferable. Has tried multiple times to kill her twin brother, burned her college roommate, had a male stripper unknowingly strip on his estranged daughter just because he insinuated that she was his rock bottom. She grew up rich, so has moments of being snarky and spoiled. Her favorite word is 'c*cksucker'. She says she feels special because she is the only woman in her friend group and says she hates other women and the only way for women to thrive is if they race against each other (all this sexism is because of her friend group and family but i shan't elaborate lest i won't stop) She lies to her therapist about her life constantly just to see if she will believe it, also broke a lot of plates and glasses in said therapist's office. Her wiki page for crimes committed speaks for itself, but she is just more of an asshole and a prick.
Ankh
He stole a cop's body and refused to give it back, he steals ice cream from kids and eats it in front of them, he endangers random bank tellers by letting the monster loose in their building run rampant without letting his lackey fight it. Pretty much the worst Birb you've ever seen. Oh yeah 800 years ago he betrayed all his friends and he'll do it again :) I forgot abt his threats to the other main characters' lives bc he does that so often but yeah he does that too! Ankh is 3 edgy 5 u or w/e the kids say. But he is the gayest
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19thcenturyfuck · 4 days
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time lords = shuckles. i shan't elaborate
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