#* fans myself INTENSELY *

[variousqueerthings]

my cute post about fourteen with the noble family is flying off the shelves, but not enough people interested in the queerness contained within the deeply intimate erotic implications of fourteen/fifteen being consciously inside one another? no fans of science fiction premises queering the visceral physical nature of knowing someone/oneself deeper than anyone else? the queerness of asexual reproduction depicting an intense connection with the self that is nigh-indescribable but is canonically beautiful and loving? the queerness inherent in fourteen's and fifteen's relationship with one another retroactively stretching back to encompass every single iteration of the doctor? the queer ideas encapsulated through depicting one being with oneself like that? the queerness that is pushing the limits of thinking up language about how we relate to our own/others bodies in space/time that is possible in science fiction? nobody think bi-regeneration is very sexy queer-coded?

#doctor who #dw #the doctor #the fifteenth doctors #the fourteenth doctor #dw spoilers #doctor who spoilers #where are all my weirdo scifi concept fans at... psstpssstpsssst #i do enjoy a bit of cuteness myself but really im here for the scifi fuckery -- the good and the evil #thinking about fucked up toymaker fic if he'd taken the doctor's suggestion #or what he was saying about killing the doctor over and over #also thinking about no-thing tardis with the doctor inside #and also ofc fourteen and fifteen having this intense connection #there will be More feelings once fifteen gets going esp if/when (ok we know it's when) the master returns #ohhh and the doctor and gods! its gonna be great #bi-generation

[joeytime]

Maxiel Hogwarts Au...

If you asked Max what he thought of Hogwarts, he would likely make a joke about pigs and insult their quidditch teams.

He isn't sure it's smart to do that now, in the middle of the Hogwarts' grand hall, completely surrounded by Hogwarts' students and staff. He isn't sure he could escape even if he had his broom.

"Wow, you really hate Hogwarts." The dreaded hat says atop his hair.

Shut up! Max thinks furiously at it. Get out of my head!

Everyone stares intensely at Max, not daring to breathe while the fate of the member of the national quidditch team is being decided. Even the teachers are at the edge of their seats, other than Dumbledore, he seems to know where Max will inevitably end up.

"Little quidditch champion. Everyone is expecting" The hat says, as if it's life of forever moving from head to head to call one of four words is somehow a greater destiny than Max's.

It's not. Max knows he will go on to succeed in life, and win as many quidditch championships as he wants and then retire on an island in The Maldives with a butt load of cash while the hat is left in a dusty room, waiting for it's yearly use. Max wants to reach to rip it up but it would not be wise to do so in front of Dumbledore himself. His hands stay in his lap, frown etched on his face.

"Impatient. Immature." Max's fingers twitch slightly. There is only so much backtalk one can take from a hat.

"Violent and uncaring, wherever will I put you?" Max doesn't agree with that description, he cares plenty, about winning that is.

"Foolish. Foolish boy." It doesn't hurt, Max has heard those words plenty of times.

Max sulks.

It's a beat of silence before the suspense reaches its climax. "Hufflepuff! " The hat hollers, not bothering to consult Max on it's decision. Which is very rude and impolite.

The entire room erupts into chaos, screams of "What! " and "No way! No way!" echo throughout the hall.

Max can't help but agree, he thought he might end up in Gryffindor or Slytherin, maybe Ravenclaw if he was super unlucky. But Hufflepuff? His father was going to disown him. The media are going to have a field day. Well they were going to already, regardless of which house Max was put in.

Dumbledore moves to pull the hat off of Max, the treacherous thing whispers one last time: "Things will make sense in time. Be patient. Do not mope."

Max doesn't mope. Verstappens can't mope, so he doesn't.

Dumbledore gently guides a slightly speechless Max to the Hufflepuff table, pushing him into the seat before winking and walking off.

Max wants to burn down this school.

Cheers erupt from the Hufflepuff table, hands coming to pat him on the back and fawn over him.

The other tables seem miserable at the prospect of losing out on a quidditch champion.

"Oh my god! Hi! Hi! Oh my god! It's you!" A boy excitedly chatters to his left, other students crowd around him and Max suddenly finds that he can't breathe. It's like he's small again, after being knocked off his broom by an overly excited big kid. He had fallen to the ground, too exhausted and overwhelmed to get back up.

His father had been mad, really mad. He hadn't slept well again after that.

"Guys! Guys! He doesn't look so good. " Whoever that is, is definitely right, Max can hardly breathe, he tries to use the breathing technique his father taught him after his first match, control his breathing. It doesn't work, it only causes the panic and urgency in his veins to surge. It did work, it's purpose was to put him on guard, not calm down.

He curls into himself, hands around his ears to protect from the deafening sound of crowds cheering. His bubble of personal space is of course pried and poked at. Fans never had any self awareness when it came to these matters and his father never did have sympathy for personal space.

Hands are pried away from him, he can hear outraged screeching at the action. His own quidditch team's screams when he was 6 years old and pulled away to join the older kids. They thought it wasn't fair that a small boy climbed the ranks faster than they did.

"Hey! Hey! Everyone back up right now!" The entire opposing team bombarding him in an attempt to stop him. The referee's reprimand that fell on deaf ears.

The people at his sides are replaced and gentle hands hold him back up, out of the ball he curled himself into.

Max doesn't dare look up, too afraid at the thought of seeing his father's judgemental look.

"Hey, are you okay? " Max turns his head, soft, gentle, warm eyes, concerned. Jos was never concerned, he was the uncaring one! Not Max!

"I'm fine. " A repeated response, practiced again and again every time he came home to his mother.

The teen with the soft eyes gestures for another boy to sit on Max's other side. The boy opposite Max looks on in concern.

"Hello. I'm Daniel Riccardo, I'm a prefect of Hufflepuff, it's nice to meet you." The gentle boy says, eyes still filled with concern.

"Max Verstappen. " Max manages to choke out.

"The boy on your left is Yuki Tsunoda and that's Lando Norris." Daniel gestures to the boy sitting opposite Max, who waves shyly.

The ruckus Max's sorting caused calms down and everyone settles down to listen to Dumbledore's welcome back speech which luckily does not mention Max.

Max feels strange between Riccardo and Tsunoda, like dread wrapped in false cotton. Norris also peers at him from time to time, creep.

They're sent back to their dorms. Max tells Riccardo that he can get there on his own but the older boy frowns and insists that he takes Max. Max thinks his father would be disappointed at his complacency but he doesn't have the strength to fight it.

Riccardo leads him to the kitchen, Max wants to snap some insult about him being a goody two shoes and how this is none of his business. He holds his tongue.

Riccardo gestures to a specific barrel, looking more worn out than the ones around it. He taps a certain beat, perhaps it's a secret code. That's childish, Max decides, they are not children playing in a fort.

The barrel swings open.

Max grimaces at the small tunnel.

"Here, you try tapping it." Riccardo puts Max's hand to the barrel.

Max repeats the rhythm perfectly. Memory exercises were part of his training.

Once Riccardo is satisfied, he points at the tunnel, almost as if he wants Max to crawl through it.

Max scrunches his nose, seriously? The older boy points more urgently and Max relents, shoving himself through the tunnel.

Well, not shoving, he's not really big, a fact his father loathed, putting him on diets with large sums of proteins and even attempting to use transfiguration spells before it was put to a stop by his mother.

Max wished his mother had not stopped his father. Maybe he would have an excuse not to join this god forsaken house.

It's an agonizing 5 second crawl before he pops out the other end right in front of Lando Norris, the boy before.

Daniel appears behind him, putting a hand on Max's shoulder.

"So Max, this is the Hufflepuff house. You know Yuki and Lando. That's Oscar, Nico and Valtteri." Riccardo urges the boys to come forward.

"It's Verstappen. " Max declares, Riccardo quirks an eyebrow and the rest of the boys look equally confused.

"Hi! I'm Lando! I'm like a huge fan, do you mind signing this for me? " The boy's yellow robes are somehow orange.

Max's PR training kicks in and he smiles one of those sickly sweet smiles that his father loves to wipe off his face before ordering him to smile again. His posture straightens and he reaches a hand around the younger boy's shoulders, patting him on his back once, twice. Just like he rehearsed.

"Sure! " His tone is so obviously a faux sweet as he reaches to retrieve the black marker from his back pocket. The boy has stars in his eyes and Max feels guilty, he always does. He's a fraud.

He signs the hat from his national team, the one he left behind.

He wishes he didn't.

"Hey, are you okay Max? " Riccardo asks, looking weird again.

"I'm doing great, how are you? " His PR trainer said asking back these questions were endearing, cute. Max's father had mocked him for that act, his trainer had been fired after that.

"How about I bring you to your room? Would you like that?" Riccardo asks, Max smiles again, nodding.

"Sure." Norris waves enthusiastically as Riccardo leads him out of the common room and into his private room.

"Are you alright? Max?"

"Call me Verstappen."

"Verstappen. Are you alright?"

"You can go, Riccardo. "

"... Call if you need anything."

When the prefect leaves, Max wants nothing but to burst into tears. He flops onto the bed.

The next day he drags himself out of bed. Even if classes don't start till 9 and the sun hasn't risen yet.

Jos expected him to continue his strict training regime. He was almost tempted to skip it and lie to his father but he thought he better not after his humiliating sorting from yesterday.

Now, alone, Max can see the Hufflepuff room properly. It's... It's all gentle lighting, none of the bright fluorescent lights his room had. The chairs looked comfy and the many plants lazing around the common room tempts him to join them.

Perhaps that would be a better fate, turning into a plant to live the rest of his life in the common room. His hand lingers on his wand, mind on a spell his professor taught him when he was just 9. He didn't.

When he had crawled out of the Hufflepuff room, fully dressed, broom in hand, the sun was just peaking from the horizon.

The halls are empty, some portraits mutter as he walks by. His father's portraits never moved, other than those instructed to. For example, a painter that never stopped moving his brush or a surfer never to take a break from the sea.

Making his way to the Hogwarts field, he stretched, slow and patient. His bones crack from the exhausting day he had before.

The field is decent sized, not as big as the one he played in during national championships, bigger than the one his father made him run laps around till he fainted.

He glides through the air easily, flying comes easily to him. If he were to be given his own time and freedom he thinks he would likely still be a top player in the school leagues.

It's better that he was hurled up though. Better to have reached the top by sheer force of his father's training.

He thinks about his national team, he's a reserve, too young to play officially but the team has him in some practices and he attends smaller competitions for them. Max suspects it's more about having a claim on Max when he comes of age.

He's 15, he still has 3 years to choose which team he wants to go to. By then, he will make his own choice. He will not do whatever pleases his father anymore.

The golden snitch twinkles near the end of the field. Max pretends not to see it.

It is fun, sometimes, tricking the golden snitch, allowing it a false sense of security. Like a tiger cub playing with a cricket.

His father would get mad at him if he did it for too long, he was upset his son couldn't catch it at once. Which Max could, he just didn't see the fun of it.

The fluttering golden ball is in his hands before it can even think of escaping.

Max briefly wonders if the snitch can possibly think, he lets it flutter away, repeating his game once again.

In the golden light of the sun and shaded path of the clouds, the wind whizzes past his ears, he falls into the familiar rhythm of flying, sometimes he makes his own obstacle courses, weaving through imaginary hoops.

By the time the sun reveals itself fully to watch Max fly, he realizes that a crowd has gathered around under him, star-struck Hogwarts students watching, mouths open and everything.

He flushes slightly, he may have had many adoring fans due to his membership in the national team and young age but come on! These were his peers.

Max lowers down, checking his watch to see that it is indeed 8.30am and he has to run if he wants to get to class not drenched in sweat.

He waves slightly to the crowd, zipping to the house dorm even though he's probably breaking several school rules.

He knocks the tune and enters quickly, still high from the adrenaline of flying.

He climbs out of the tunnel only to come face to face with Daniel Riccardo, his face stern and stony.

"Verstappen! You can't just sneak out like that!" Daniel's expression softens when he sees Max.

Max knows he feels pity even if Riccardo knows nothing about his life.

"I of course did not sneak out, I left my room and went to the field." Max doesn't think early hour training counts as sneaking out, going to parties in the dead of the night is sneaking out.

"Max, we were worried. I went into your room and you weren't there. Thought you'd been kidnapped by the other houses to play quidditch for them or something... "

Max considers this briefly, Riccardo knocking on his door gleefully, freezing when he doesn't get an answer. Did his blood pressure spike? Did he throw Max's door open in desperation only to find the room empty?

Max grimaces.

"I went to go training... Sorry..." Max stands awkwardly, hands by his side like a child being punished by a parent.

Riccardo sighs. Max wants to cry.

"Please forgive me, I'm of course sorry, I will do anything!" Max cringes inside, begging with someone other than his father is a foreign concept.

Riccardo has a cheeky smile on his face, Max is almost scared.

"I'll forgive you... Only if you call me Daniel!"

Max groans inwardly, well he's also partly relieved but Daniel doesn't need to know that.

"What will it be Max? Will you call me the d word? Or will you suffer in my never ending spite! "Daniel's grin grows.

" Fine. "

" Fine, who? "

"Fine. Daniel."

Max flushes, weird.

Daniel looks elated.

#max verstappen #daniel ricciardo #maxiel #harry potter au #hogwarts au #my writing #baby's first fic #i am baby btw #I will accept criticism but if you raise your voice I will cry #Christian is obviously the head Hufflepuff teacher and loves all his children #Toto is the Ravenclaw teacher and they have intense quidditch matches every year #no rights for the lion and snake house #writing my Lando is/was a fan of Max agenda #Im not sure why i included Dumbledore though the image of him standing next to any of the F1 boys is hilarious #I wrote this a year ago and beta read it myself yay #did not get an A for English #The last name to first name pipeline is real #F1=quidditch #okay enough yapping #i posted this once and it didnt work so this is the second attempt sorry

[ialwaysknewyouwerepunk]

.

#so... are there any ts fans out there who wanna talk with me about the album #(as a fan myself just not.. an intense one. havent been in the loop with the release so far) #in a way that isn't “everything's perfect i love her” #i need to get some things off my chest #things ive been feeling ever since i saw the tracklist #taylor swift

[mariesoliver]

Every episode of Beef i'm like these ppl sure are making decisions

#all of them worse than the one before god bless #this is strangely such a soothing show to me like #it's making me confront some repressed feelings and also confronts me with a life i'm afraid of making for myself #where you feel so intensely lonely and live mostly out of spite and sense of responsibility #and omg when their lives FINALLY seem alright when everything eventualy seems to fall into place and satisfaction is just within reach #shit hits the fan #beef netflix

[morrigan-sims]

Year In Review - 2023

Thanks for sticking with me through this year. I can't wait to see what next year brings for me!

January / February / March April / May / June July / August / September October / November / December

Honorable Mentions:

One / Two / Three Four / Five / Six Seven / Eight

#ts4 #the sims 4 #my year in review #I posted four whole story posts this year!!! I'm trying to be proud of myself for that. #as you can see this year was the year that DnD took over my life. #from critical role fan sims to the dnd cas challenge and then Rook taking over my brain. #I also feel like I improved a lot with my edits. #specifically the two tarot card edits are amazing. some of my best work to date. #and I feel like my cinematography with Nora's story posts was a step up from where it was before. #apparently black red and green were the colors of the year lmao. #I'm glad I made at least 4 really intensive edits to put on here. #and also glad that I posted 4 story poses this year. #that's almost nothing compared to last year but it's still progress!

[teex]

#tyler seguin #jamie benn #nhl #dallas stars #oyb gifs #i dont know how to concisely explain why i am putting content that includes jamie benn on my blog #i guess its because he is such a big part of the team and so important to the guys #i love tyler and tyler loves him and that means this moment is still cute to me #tbc i think the post he liked in 2020? 2021? was gross and the opinions shared were fucked #trans girls are girls and they should be in every space we have in society for girls including sports #was that like more ignorance driven vs hateful?? idk we have so little insight into most players and ignorance is still dangerous #i understand that a lot of ppl are upset by and just dislike him intensely and for very valid reasons and will always tag for filtering #(im not all that fond myself but there are moments interacting w other players i wanna save on my blog) #sorry idk why im typing this i just know hes a sensitive subject and has hurt so many stars fans #ok

[haunted-xander]

So because I have ADHD and love making things hard for myself, I've decided I'm gonna draw every character I obtain in hsr

Am I expecting to completely go through with it without art block or ADHD stopping me? Not really but I will sure as hell try!

(HSR gacha illust. 1/??)

#granted i dont have THAT many characters rn #14 illustrations is still a lot #but i think ill be able to do it #am i overconfident in saying that? probably #but whatever ive set myself this goal and im not gonna give up prematurely! #besides i did manage to make like. 28 illustrations for my chiaki au #(which was slightly less than initially planned but still) #and those had character interactions intense lighting and fucking actual BACKGROUNDS #so i think ill manage 14 single character illusts lol #stelle #trailblazer #honkai star rail #hsr #art #my art #xanders art #digital art #fan art

[good-beans]

I’ve talked about media that “has a character for everyone” and I think that’s one of the things that’s really effective for Milgram’s emotional impact on the audience – especially because it does it in a unique way from other media. 

Though I discovered it recently, I’ve already seen many “if you forgive x you’re a horrible person,” “if you condemn x it’s on sight” type posts for all characters. (Which, yeah, are bad, but also) I find it deliciously entertaining to see that Milgram spread their cast out enough to reach any audience. 

It’s not just “oh I also have murderous thoughts so I’m projecting onto this murderer :)”, it’s “I was a victim and this character gives me catharsis and had the strength for the revenge that I craved.” It’s “I, too, would be pushed to great lengths for the one I love out of desperation.” It’s “there was a time I was young and didn’t know better, I did some shit too.” And so on – It covers so many character types that even people who have never been in the same situations find traits/symbols to relate to. Maybe you’re nothing like Fuuta, but could think “I was online during the pandemic and felt crushed by injustice, all I craved was justice and belonging.” Maybe you’re nothing like Mahiru, but could think “(even if it wasn't romantic love,) I’ve been blinded by the bliss of finally getting a taste of something I’ve wanted my whole life and lost sight as it consumed me.” 

And this isn’t a traditional case of getting attached to characters in media, because you actually have to watch this person, that some part of you identifies with and finds reassurance/catharsis in, as they are judged black-and-white by the public.

Milgram packs such a punch because we feel parts of ourselves getting judged by the public, as well.

#milgram #milgram project #of course this is a generalization - im sure not every single fan sees themselves on trial #but i think an already emotional practice of attacking/defending characters has become even more intense #and honestly im here for it #its such an interesting and unique experience for a piece of anime media adfsdds #its also really cool to see what others see in different characters #i love hearing people passionately defend characters i originally disliked #i always get a new perspective on how they could reflect people i know/even myself #idk maybe this is dumb but i think its super cool #rose posts

[skinnypaleangryperson]

I don't know if it's just me, but are they gradually dumbing down Rick's character for the sake of keeping the show popular?

I got extreme Peter Griffin vibes from this episode, and I feel like in general he's a lot less sharp and cool gritty and witty and "unconventional" the way that he was the first couple of seasons. He wasn't an easy character to "swallow" in a lot of ways so to speak, and I feel like he's gradually getting dumber, more cloudy around the edges, less sharp and more conventional and shallow with a lot of the things that he says. He feels extremely typical sometimes this season-like more of the character that people would watch because the character doesn't challenge their headspace in any kind of way, and is someone that encourages their complacent drunk dead personality.

The character used to say things that was really unpopular, or at the very least would occasionally say things that would make people uncomfortable (just things like "if you know how you're going to die because of how boring your life is then you're not even alive" and just things that challenged at the boring drunk complacent status quo that most American sitcom characters are), was an extreme breath of fresh air in terms of how sharp he was and how he wasn't afraid to challenge everything even if it was just in a TV show character kind of way, and it's one of the things that stuck out about me about him the most, especially as someone who is mentally ill and feels detached from most of American culture.

I might just be in a bad mood, but I genuinely feel like Rick feels less sharp and "unconventional"and is starting to feel increasingly more dumb, dopey and easy to swallow as a character.

I still love him and I always will, and sometimes I find it endearing, but this episode in particular felt like he was just being a dumb genuine and boring drunk (really just in terms of the scene with Beth, but considering that the episodes are only about 22 minutes, there isn't a lot of elbow room to work with, especially considering most of this episode was summer screen time).

The only reason why I care so much is because of Rick is one of the very few characters I've ever been genuinely connected with, so I'm just worried that Rick as a character is going down to gradual slippery slope of just becoming an American extremely overly dumbed it down product. The show was so gritty and real and raw and a lot of ways for the first three to four seasons and kept that touch up to season 6, but this season just feels like they're gradually going into "American Dad" type feeling territory, and I'm vaguely worried a little bit about my connection to the show. Especially as someone that does not connect to things easily or ever at all really. And partially because everything is so dumbed down and doesn't seem to have any and genuine philosophy behind it except of being another brainless thing for people to consume to pass the time.

#I'm just complaining to myself #because I don't like talking to people on Reddit #lol #rick and morty #if anybody thinks that I'm being melodramatic then I am because there is such thing as being mentally ill because of real life #problems and being deeply in love with characters because for whatever reason that's what makes sense to my brain #I have no friends in this fandom so I can post as obnoxiously as I want anyway lol #Rick is one of the very few things that means enough to me to bring out this passionate side of me #when it comes to consumption #literally not even kidding but my attachment to Rick is so deep #that even just having a certain kind of dopey looked his expression after being confronted in a certain way from being caught drunk can put #me off #for the record I am aware of the fact that my attachment to Rick is unhealthy #and therefore how passionate I am about him is vaguely off-putting or a lot off putting depending on who you are #but I am a self-aware unhealthy person #and I'm also wear the fact that literally nobody has to put up with somebody else's posts if they don't like how intense or mentally ill #they are #fans like me would be better off at this point if the show was canceled #not because I want it to be but because I've become so specifically attached in my extreme labretentious way from other way that Rick was #presented the first six or so seasons that I feel like at this point I've become almost too picky #and obviously it's not about what I think #but I am saying this as someone that is more than content to be fixated on a canceled TV show because of how perfect it already was #like bj #literally the strongest relationship I've ever had with a character #and it's from a canceled TV show of literally 4 years lol

[illiana-mystery]

Still cleaning out my old phone's SD card and still enjoying the fine wine. 🍷

#goddamn #i have to fan myself #because that heat #is strong #the hotness #is intense #🥵🥵🥵🥵 #he aged like fine wine #beautiful man #my sweet alfredo #my heart #❤️❤️❤️❤️ #alfred molina

[soldier-poet-king]

Hope is CANCELLED the horrors have returned

#the duality of fran #the horrors this time being. loneliness. existential dread. WANTING and hating myself for WANTING #i need to go eat lunch and maybe I'll calm down #work is so boring rn and theres SO much background noise bc fans and repairs #it is not doing me any sensory favours #but yeah. maybe. maybe love love and devotion and it doesnt have to be romantic #but it has to be intense and deeply intertwined and permanent and just. more. it needs to be more #maybe its about the deep unending hunger of it all! #wish there was a way to want without being cringe embarassing i should light myself on fire bad

[fagmoans]

musk lovers everywhere will be delighted to know that despite the fact i just showered 20 mins ago my natural musk is so strong that my bush already stinks good again

#not a musk fan myself but as a dog i can still appreciate a good Smell. #being on T has made it so much more intense. jesus christ #certified fag post

[billfarrah]

The intensity of Wille’s gaze toward Simon

I’m not sure how Simon is going to be able to avoid pouncing on him especially after the growth spurt and dapper new hair cut; combined with these looks I’d be a goner, but good luck to our boy

#young royals #yr season 2 spoilers #wilmon #Wille is so intense #I’m fanning myself just looking at these

[marsixm]

ep 7 is just weird bc i dont think any of the Things that happened were out of character i just feel like a lot of the dialogue absolutely was

#like not just for ed and stede but everybody #maybe im wrong but idkkkkk #i know ‘oh thats ooc’ coming from a fan is always a biased topic but i never felt that way before #imma zip it about this subject now tho bc i dont want it to be one of those sticky ocd points for me #but i do still feel quite unfuckable about the whole thing #idc if myself and everybody else absolutely despised an episode baby aint nothing gonna break my stride anymore #its wild seeing some of the more intense younger fans on twitter being intense about it the way i used to be abt things…. #like ships passing in the night… #i Get It but also the joy is more important 2 me now

[monarchisms]

It's nearly been what, a year now? Your time as the RTAH "expert" has passed and I'm begging someone to take that torch for you bestie.

1. “expert” in quotes is extremely funny because it’s true. most of what i knew/know was from google, and the rest is from what watching their content since i was 13 does to a mf

2. considering the batshit questions i got during whatever was the “peak” of the fandom, no one in their right mind would want this torch. i didn’t even want this torch, especially after experiencing god know how many controversies the company went through in the past year alone

#suffering from success.png #mexicocitywildwings #ask box 360 #my relationship with rt now is how it was when i considered myself a fan #in that i am almost exclusively a Huge hater with nearly the same intensity as always

[vampirecatprince]

The way my autistic ass is absolutely obsessed with almost anything horror related (minus zombies) for basically my whole fucking life and I ONLY JUST NOW REALIZED THAT HORROR IS A SPECIAL INTEREST OF MINE🧍

#it's funny because I am one of the most easily startled people I know #my default state is anxious and scared #so why tf do i intentionally seek this shit out 💀 #its funny bc i get those moments of Genuine Fear still and my first reaction is almost always 'oh boy new favorite thing!!!' #like Skinamarink briefly revived my fear of the dark for almost A MONTH and i still think it's Great and I Like It A Lot #it's also funny because I wouldn't have considered myself a horror fan as a child #but i watched some intense shit? like- i was 11 and watching shit like 13 Ghosts