#Dignity Boston

[bosguy]

Making friends in Boston LGBTQ social groups

Looking to connect and make some new friends? Whether you're new to #Boston or been here for years, these groups are here to help you make friends and meet people.

With the influx  of so many new residents at the start of each academic year, I like to update and share this post. If you are new to the area or looking to meet more people outside of a bar setting, the groups listed below might be a good first step.  If you don’t see relevant or up-to-date information in the links shared below, contact me, and I can help find a contact for that group to learn…

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#BAGLY #Boston Gay Men&039;s Book Club #Boston Gay Men&039;s Chorus #Boston Gaymers #Boston LesBiGay Urban Foundation #Boston Prime Timers #Boston Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence #Boston Sober Gay Sundays #Dignity Boston #Fenway Health #Gay Beer Club #Gays for Patsy #Mass Bears & Cubs #OUTbreath #Queer Boston Board Gamers #Yankee Cruising Club

[gwydionmisha]

#Boston #Marriage Licenses #Dignity #LGBTQIA+ #News

[scarletlizzard]

For what it’s worth, you’d make a very, very pretty puddle. And I know you’re well-mannered, honey, you’ve been nothing but the best girl since your performative spell of bad behaviour early on, and we soon had you remembering your place, didn’t we?

Awww baby, blushing over such simple truths? I’m yet to even say what you call me…where do you think you would place in your little kink rankings, hmm? Do you think your anons would suspect you of being so utterly depraved? Adorable, and you know I love it when such a clever girl is rendered dumb and speechless.

-🫖

Stop making me smile at my phone!! (Pretty puddle turned me into a puddle, so words have become reality thanks a lot)

Hmm, no comment? My place being in charge of this blog and everyone on it, right, right exactly!

😳😳😳😳

I call you little Brit, of course! 👀 Everyone knows that haha 👀 no worries. Anons, LOOK AWAY for the love of God.

Utterly depraved? Me? Little Brit, I could never!

(I think we all know by now I'm a disaster)

Call me clever again and I will be booking a flight. Did you think about that? I bet not. You might want to think next time before you type!

#scarletlizzard asks #🫖 anon #ohhhh little Brit #each ask i post i feel my dignity being stripped away #but then again thats how you want it dont you #so much for the boston tea party

[aspirinqs]

but why does it say boston. i have tried to be cool about this because mostly i have genuinely felt indifferent to kelsey grammer’s “i am bringing back frasier without any other cast member” hill, and am weary of reboots —— but why does it say boston. i am too nd for that detail of it

#mobile. #why does it say boston #you so much as mention diane chambers - #do not dare try to tarnish her dignity again

[spacelazarwolf]

apparently a bunch of ppl on social media are trying to call for a boycott of rick riordan because of this statement in a blog post:

Becky and I are just back from a busy weekend with events at the Boston Book Festival and New York Comic-Con.

Before I get into that, however, some words to acknowledge the ongoing horrors in Israel and Gaza. As many of you may know, I am no longer on social media. My accounts post only updates on my books and related projects. I do not read posts, reply to posts, or share my thoughts about world events on those forums. That doesn’t mean I don’t have strong feelings and reactions. It means I am offline as completely as possible, except for the occasional blog post like this one.

I will say this: Over the last eighteen years, I have received many fan letters from young readers, both Israeli and Palestinian, who often told me that my books helped them escape the fear, grief and anxiety they were dealing with at the time. Some had lost family members to violence. Some were writing while in the distance they could hear explosions, gunfire, and the launching of rockets. They used my books as a way to escape into another world, where the monsters were fictional, and where demigods usually saved the day. While I am always glad that my books can help young readers find joy during difficult times, my heart breaks every time I hear about the things they have to deal with. I am grief-stricken by the horrific events now unfolding, especially because I know that they are part of a long historic pattern that has been robbing too many children of their childhood and perpetuating hatred for far too long.

I am also quite aware that when anyone, myself included, tries to speak about this issue, the reader is waiting to pounce, thinking, “Yes, but whose side are you on?” That is exactly the wrong question. If there are two sides to this issue, those sides are not Palestinian/Israeli or Muslim/Jewish. The two sides are humanitarian and dehumanizing. Dehumanizing has a long evil history. It is appealing and easy to buy into, because humans are tribal animals. We are hardwired to think in terms of ‘us’ versus ‘them.’ We are the real humans, the good guys, the ones with God on our side. Those other people are evil monsters who don’t deserve empathy. Hate mongers have thrived on dehumanizing for as long as there have been humans. It provides them with a purpose, a way to rally support, power, and scapegoats. It is easy to point to atrocities committed by our enemies, while justifying or minimizing the atrocities committed by ourselves or our allies.

Humanitarianism is a much harder sell. It requires us to empathize, to see other groups of people as equally deserving of dignity and quality of life. It requires not always putting ourselves and our needs first. But in the long run, humanitarianism is our only hope. If violence could end violence, if we could put an end to “those other people” once and for all, human history would read very differently than it does.

So yes, I am appalled by the Hamas attacks on Israeli civilians. I am appalled by the suffering of Palestinian civilians in Gaza. Both things can be true. Both things must be true. My thoughts are with all the people who have died, who have lost loved ones, who have had their worlds and their lives shattered, especially the children. More death and violence will not break this cycle, which has been going on for generations. There is no military solution. Even since I first wrote the post, only twenty-four hours ago, the Israeli government’s brutal retaliation against the entire population of Gaza has reached genocidal proportions. This is not only an atrocity. It is folly. Answering misery with misery only creates more fertile ground for extremism, dehumanizing the “other side,” letting hate mongers thrive, stay in power, and reduce us all to our most monstrous impulses. The only real solution is treating each other like equally worthy human beings, and negotiating a peace that allows all parties a chance to live in security and dignity, with hopes for a future that does not include bombs and rockets and gunfire. This means security and support for Israel, yes. It also means a secure Palestine which is allowed to get the international aid and recognition it needs to build a viable state.

Do I think that will happen? Unfortunately, no. Humans are simply too selfish, too ready to blame “the other” for all their problems, too ready to dehumanize, though I also believe, perhaps paradoxically, that most people just want to live their lives in peace and have a chance for their children to have a brighter future. The problem is when we don’t allow other people to have those same hopes and dreams — when it becomes a false choice of us versus them.

What can I do? I will continue to write books that I hope will give young readers some joy. I will resist the urge to demonize entire groups of people. I will call for less violence, not more violence. And when asked whose side I am on, I will tell you I am on the side of humanitarianism.

So with that said, I return to the world of books . . .

honestly, if you have a problem with this statement, it’s probably because he’s talking about you. this is exactly what legitimate activists (as in not just random westerners who share social media posts but on-the-ground activists who are doing real work) have been saying for decades. and i think all this really speaks to just how disconnected a lot of westerners who claim to be pro palestinian are from those activists.

if you can’t read a statement that says “i am on the side of humanitarianism and less violence” without immediately jumping to cancel them, you are the problem being discussed in the above statement.

#ip

[thechanelmuse]

Juneteenth is a Black American holiday. 

We call Juneteenth many things: Black Independence Day, Freedom Day, Emancipation Day, Jubilee Day. We celebrate and honor our ancestors. 

December 31 is recognized as Watch Night or Freedom’s Eve in Black American churches because it marks the day our enslaved ancestors were awaiting news of their freedom going into 1863. On January 1, 1863, President Lincoln issued the Emancipation Proclamation. But all of the ancestors wouldn’t be freed until June 19, 1865 for those in Galveston, Texas and even January 23, 1866 for those in New Jersey (the last slave state). (It’s also worth noting that our people under the Choctaw and Chickasaw Nations wouldn’t be freed until April 28, 1866 and June 14, 1866 for those under the Cherokee Nation by way of the Treaties.)

Since 1866, Black Americans in Texas have been commemorating the emancipation of our people by way of reading the Emancipation Proclamation and coming together to have parades, free festivities, and later on pageants. Thereafter, it spread to select states as an annual day of commemoration of our people in our homeland. 

Here’s a short silent video filmed during the 1925 Juneteenth celebration in Beaumont, Texas:

(It’s also worth noting that the Mascogos tribe in Coahuila, Mexico celebrate Juneteenth over there as well. Quick history lesson: A total of 305,326 Africans were shipped to the US to be enslaved alongside of American Indians who were already or would become enslaved as prisoners of war, as well as those who stayed behind refusing to leave and walk the Trail of Tears to Oklahoma. In the United States, you were either enslaved under the English territories, the Dutch, the French, the Spanish, or under the Nations of what would called the Five “Civilized” Native American Tribes: Cherokee, Creek (Muscogee), Chickasaw, Choctaw, and Seminoles. Mascogos descend from the Seminoles who escaped slavery during the Seminole Wars, or the Gullah Wars that lasted for more than 100 years if you will, and then settled at El Nacimiento in 1852.)

We largely wave our red, white and blue flags on Juneteenth. These are the only colors that represent Juneteenth. But sometimes you may see others wave our Black American Heritage flag (red, black, and gold).

Juneteenth is a day of respect. It has nothing to do with Africa, diversity, inclusion, immigration, your Pan-African flag, your cashapps, nor your commerce businesses. It is not a day of “what about” isms. It is not a day to tap into your inner colonizer and attempt to wipe out our existence. That is ethnocide and anti-Black American. If you can’t attend a Black American (centered) event that’s filled with education on the day, our music, our food and other centered activities because it’s not centered around yours…that is a you problem. Respect our day for what and whom it stands for in our homeland. 

Juneteenth flag creator: “Boston Ben” Haith 

It was created in 1997. The red, white and blue colors represent the American flag. The five-point star represents the Lone State (Texas). The white burst around the star represents a nova, the beginning of a new star. The new beginning for Black Americans. 

Black American Heritage Flag creators: Melvin Charles & Gleason T. Jackson

It was created in 1967, our Civil Rights era. The color black represents the ethnic pride for who we are. Red represents the blood shed for freedom, equality, justice and human dignity. Gold fig wreath represents intellect, prosperity, and peace. The sword represents the strength and authority exhibited by a Black culture that made many contributions to the world in mathematics, art, medicine, and physical science, heralding the contributions that Black Americans would make in these and other fields. 

SN: While we’re talking about flags, I should note that Grace Wisher, a 13-year-old free Black girl from Baltimore helped stitched the Star Spangled flag, which would inspire the national anthem during her six years of service to Mary Pickersgill. I ain’t even gon hold you. I never looked too far into it, but she prob sewed that whole American flag her damn self. They love lying about history here until you start unearthing them old documents. 

In conclusion, Juneteenth is a Black American holiday. Respect us and our ancestors.

#juneteenth #juneteenth flag #black american history #black american culture #ben haith #black american heritage flag #melvin charles #gleason t jackson #grace wisher #american flag #mascogos #juneteenth 2023

[bird-inacage]

Only Friends: Sand's crushing reality 'It's never about me'

I've noticed a lot of comments wishing Sand could be open about his feelings for Ray. Though that's a fair assessment and would save us a tonne of agony, I've attempted to delve into why this isn't so simple.

The Weight of Dignity & Mutual Respect

Sand comes across as someone who highly values dignity. Everyone deserves to be treated with due respect, and this is seen through how he interacts with others. Sand gets upset when someone questions his integrity, such as when Ray insinuates him to be a thief or questions him for bootlegging alcohol. He gets angry when someone tries to hurt Ray whilst his back is turned. Sand lives his life by an honourable and respectful philosophy, and the least he expects is for others to treat him the same way.

Therefore it's understandable that he hates being treated like a fool (whether that's being taken advantage of, humiliated or subjected to unwarranted judgement).

Ray has consistently maintained that he doesn't see Sand as a boyfriend. Said so himself, repeatedly. (Despite his actions indicating otherwise but that's another post in itself). So if Sand were to reveal his feelings, when he has no definitive confirmation that Ray is taking any of this seriously, he's going to risk feeling incredibly exposed and ridiculous. One of the reasons why rejection is so painful is due to the shame that comes with it. A hit of crippling inadequacy and embarrassment. Being confronted with: 'You're not good enough for me. You don't meet my standards. You're not what I want'.

Sand has probably had to experience a fair amount of falling short. To be lesser than, but largely due to means outside his control. He's been able to rise above those things. However, with Ray, he's not comfortable being in a position where he may be stripped of his dignity.

Boston being the one who dropped the bombshell is what made Sand feel incredibly stupid. For not knowing. For not being told. Which was arguably 100% times worse than hearing it from Ray himself. To be treated with respect is hoping someone will see you as an equal. Regardless of whether they are more than friends - even just between friends, Ray has never alluded to this. (To be fair, he may have been close, but now we'll never know). In that moment, it dawns on Sand how little he knows of Ray.

My belief is that if he were aware of Ray still being in love with Mew, he wouldn't make a move. Because that wouldn't be the honourable or respectful thing to do. So he’s been led to indulge in a fantasy that was never going to materialise. He wasn't in the loop. No one clued him in. He's not been treated equal. He feels like the butt of a bad joke. How could he possibly open up to Ray after that?

The 'Brave Face' of a Caretaker

Sand is a man defined by responsibility. Due to having only one parent in his life, he's learnt to be his mother's rock; resilient and steadfast. The sacrifice of having a caretaker mentality is that your own wellbeing is often an afterthought. How frequently do these types of people in our lives get asked how they feel. How are they doing? They're so busy taking care of everyone else or taking care of 'business', that no one ever thinks to ask. Their cries for help are much quieter, much less obvious and go undetected.

Though Sand is not the best at hiding it, he'll quickly distract others from his own disappointment, upset and hurt for the sake of greater harmony or in consideration of someone else's feelings. 'It's not about me', he seems to remind himself. 'I've got to keep it together. I've got be strong. There's a lot resting on me'.

Caretakers need others to take notice of them. To see past their seemingly infallible façade. They need others to initiate care and concern because they won’t put themselves first. Though Sand's mother evidently adores him, he’s clearly established a dynamic where he takes care of her. So who takes care of Sand? No one. He's on his own. He has no choice but to suck it up when things get tough and move forward as best he can. Life isn't going to stop for him.

Though hugely rattled, Sand immediately diffuses the fight. No questions, no demands that Ray explain himself. He’s still protective of Ray. No matter what happens, he comes second.

The Fault is Yours

Sand really desires someone to see him as 'special', as extraordinary. His life often revolves around others, so if he’s someone else’s priority, that will be a sign. This is why Sand was so affected by Ray passing him up for someone else - he felt expendable.

The gut-wrenching thing about Sand is he doesn't target blame onto others. He doesn't resent his father (who has no idea of his existence). He doesn't resent his mother (who wasn't able to give him a good start in life). He doesn't even resent Ray when he finds out about Mew (because Ray knew Mew first). Instead Sand internalises hardship as a reflection on himself. The reason why Ray can't see him as a boyfriend must be a product of his own shortcomings. Perhaps he's unworthy of someone like Ray to begin with. Boston makes a passing comment that men with Ray's looks and wealth are hard to come by. Sand doesn't need to be reminded that Ray has options. Access to more options besides him.

Things were never handed to Sand on a silver platter, and so he isn't one to assume anything. Don't assume Ray's feelings even if you have a hunch. Don't assume that Ray will fight for you. Don't assume that when push comes to shove, Ray will choose you. Because who are you to assume those things?

It's one thing to be told you can't have something. But it's another to feel like you don't deserve something. As if you never had the right. Never had a chance.

The fault is yours for thinking you did.

Because you're simply not that special.

(Note: So I'm going to need to see a situation where Ray takes care of Sand please. The boy needs it. He needs someone to fight for him for a change. Bear in mind this is just an analysis of what Sand may be feeling. A lot of these assumptions are untrue as Ray does care. But Sand doesn't know what to think anymore.)

#only friends #only friends the series #ofts #only friends meta #ray x sand #sand x ray #sand #firstkhao #khaofirst #first kanaphan #khaotung thanawat #protect him please #god sand absolutely broke my heart this episode #he needs a hug #sand really doesn't have anyone to lean on #he carries so much on his own shoulders

[nansheonearth]

 A Boston shelter tried a new approach to finding women stable housing. Three years later, its success is clear.

Since launching its stabilization program in July 2020, Women’s Lunch Place says that 97 percent of women who found housing are still living in their homes.

By Alysa Guffey Globe Correspondent,Updated August 30, 2023, 5:51 a.m.

Nancy Edwards in her apartment.SUZANNE KREITER/GLOBE STAFF

Two years ago, Nancy Edwards fell into homelessness after being priced out of rent in Southern California. With her two dogs, Roo and Tink, in tow, she decided to drive across the country with all her belongings packed in her small sedan. Her final destination would be Boston, the home of her only child and the last place she says she received adequate mental health care.

She arrived in Boston in September 2021, and later that month met Lianne O’Reilly, a behavioral health and stabilization clinician at Women’s Lunch Place, a daytime shelter and advocacy center serving people who identify as female.

With help from O’Reilly and Women’s Lunch Place, Edwards, 65, was able to receive the mental health care she needed and took the first steps in applying for housing in the city.

“I was able to make heads or tails out of life and rescue myself from being homeless,” Edwards said.

Edwards is one of 173 clients who Women’s Lunch Place has helped to secure housing since the organization launched its housing stabilization program in July 2020. Three years later, the organizaton reports that 97 percent, or 167, of the women are still living in their new homes.

At Pine Street Inn shelter, a mother and daughter persevere and find communityNew housing strategy behind Mass. and Cass cleanup offers ‘hope, dignity’ — and may be a solution to homelessness, officials say‘Permanent supportive housing’ may be controversial to would-be neighbors, but it’s been beneficial to those who live in it

Located on Newbury Street in Back Bay, the stabilization program is designed to provide clients at Women’s Lunch Place with wraparound services before and after they receive keys for an apartment, said Doris Romero, the center’s housing and stabilization manager. Often times, women who walk through the doors have a steep learning curve when living on their own and can be evicted if they do not have continuous support.

“The last thing that I want is after getting someone into housing is for them to lose their housing,” Romero said.

Romero facilitates conversations with landlords, property managers, leasing officers, and even other tenants to ease the burden on clients. Each woman seeking housing is paired with a full-time advocate from the organization, and the team has doubled in size since its inception, she added.

For some, the housing search can take years, with some guests only moving into homes now after originally starting a housing application five years ago, said Romero. Other times, partnerships and applications with the city can speed up the process for those who really need housing. For instance, Edwards submitted an application to the Elders Living At Home Program through Boston Medical Center.

“In the application you have to explain why this person needs housing, and as soon as I met [Edwards,] I knew that housing was really key to her stability and moving forward,” O’Reilly said.

As a result, Edwards moved in to her new home about seven months after connecting with Women’s Lunch Place.

“It’s nice and quiet and I feel secure,” Edwards said on a recent Friday in her one-bedroom apartment in the South End.

Nancy Edwards in her apartment.SUZANNE KREITER/GLOBE STAFF

While stabilization programs are not necessarily a new invention, Women’s Lunch Place’s method of keeping tabs on and tracking women it helps find housing is encouraging, because it shows “obvious and dramatic evidence that it works,” said Susan Sered, professor of sociology at Suffolk University.

For the past 15 years, Sered has been following a group of about 50 women in Boston who fall in and out of homelessness. In her research, she has seen women lose housing because of substandard living conditions or abusive men in their life who visit homes and cause trouble — issues that can often be prevented with robust stabilization services.

“A lot of these problems are dealt with before they get out of control,” she said of the system in place at Women’s Lunch Place. “They can provide this kind of really intensive support that can help people get through that difficult period or a difficult incident and hold on to their housing.”

Romero said she poses as many questions as possible to find a strong fit for each individual client.

“Do they want to stay in Boston? Do they want roommates or their own space?”

However, even though the program is run through the shelter, women who seek the stabilization services have their own agency throughout the process, choosing where, when, and what they apply to.

“We can provide them options of different opportunities, but they get to choose where they want to apply to,” Romero said.

Most of the clients would prefer to stay in Boston, Romero said, but that doesn’t always work out. Sometimes, after looking at options in Boston, she encourages clients to look elsewhere, such as the North or South Shore, to set realistic expectations. Romero added that the center has had luck stabilizing people in Medford and Watertown homes.

The stabilization program is unique since it doesn’t end once women get the keys to their new place.

“People really assume like everything’s like sunshine and flowers once you get housed,” O’Reilly said. “And it can be, but for a lot of people it can be traumatic in many ways.”

The length of stabilization looks different for each client, Romero said. Advocates visit the homes of their clients as much as they need to help with everything from setting up cable to finding a church community nearby.

Women’s Lunch Place also assists clients facing possible eviction — a vital component of stabilization services, staff members say.

Estella Green, 55, credits the program for her finding stable housing and avoiding eviction after she had been sleeping on the streets or couch surfing for almost three years.

“I was in a place where I was about to go downhill, but I came here and I asked for help and they helped me,” Green said.

With help from her advocate, Christina Labossiere, Green has lived in a one-bedroom apartment in Brighton for more than two years. Since March, the organization has assisted Green in applying to the city’s Residential Assistance for Families in Transition program, which helps keep households in stable housing situations when facing eviction, loss of utilities, and other housing emergencies.

Green said she loves the apartment, especially the bed to sleep in, but still comes to Women’s Lunch Place almost daily because that — not Brighton — is her community.

“You can relax, be comfortable, and you can always find someone to talk to,” Green said.

Alysa Guffey can be reached at [email protected]. Follow her @AlysaGuffeyNews.

Edit:

Here's a link to donate to Women's Lunch Place

Follow them on ig

If you reblogged the previous version, reblog with the donate link.

#radfem #alysa guffey #women's lunch place #boston #massachusetts #new england #housing #sisterhood #solidarity #resources #welfare #ideas #to do #o #boston globe

[liyazaki]

“the opposite of love is not hate; it is use. use is the abuse of love- in fact, it betrays love. when we use another person, we place their needs below our own- but worse yet? we place their value & dignity below ours.” -L. Darrow

it's one thing to be a fuckboi. there's no shame in sleeping around, as long all parties are being safe, sane & consensual about it. they're typically pretty cut & dry arrangements- like I've said before, you know what you're getting into (or at least you should).

but Boston & Top- they're a third (worse) secret thing: parasites. their characters make me think of anglerfish, using any lure at their disposal to draw their prey to them- & they're good at it.

Boston's lure: a no-strings-attached situationship, but oh wait- is it? "could you be the one to change my cold, cold ways? 🥺👉👈" it's classic college-age douchebag behavior, with a calculated, cruel helping of emotional leading-on. Boston's lying & he knows he's lying. he's a piece of shit, but he's a relatively transparent piece of shit.

Top is much more insidious. I'm convinced the man fully believes his own lies. he starts with a goal, methodically creates a persona, then becomes it in order to achieve said goal.

when he's gazing lovingly at Mew, when he's fussing over him, when he's being considerate & thoughtful & remembering the little things- I think he means it, at least until his goal is achieved. it'll be interesting to see where he goes from here now that he got what he wanted.

the thing with Boston & Top is that they can eat & eat & eat & they will never, ever be full.

whether it's fleeting emotional connection, sex that's out of their reach (until it's not), attention (negative included- look at Boston's outburst today while they were drinking) or whatever else- these men are hungry; always hungry.

they're missing something fundamental, & everyone in their vicinity is at constant risk of being left in their wake.

though they're different in their approach, the end result is the same: a slow leeching of other people's energy, emotions, time & resources, leaving them with less than what they started with.

of course, the ultimate comeuppance for both of them would be to fall madly in love with Mew & Nick respectively, only to have a) their own game played on them or b) have that emotional leverage weaponized against them- i.e. "oh, you're in love with me? aww- too fucking bad."

I'm not holding out major hope for either because I don't think Mew or Nick are brutal enough (although Nick gives me pause sometimes), but even just a little dose of either would make me one satisfied viewer.

#only friends #only friends the series #ofts #only friends meta #this reads a lot less poetic than it sounded in my head but #cest la vie

[copperbadge]

Sam, because you lived in Boston, I assume you have walked pat the statue of Mary Dyer on the Statehouse grounds. I don’t know if you were aware that the statue commemorates her hanging for being a Friend (Quaker).

I lived in Boston for a summer and I get out there at least once a year and I knew about Mary Dyer already and I made a special trip to see the monument to anesthesia on Boston Commons, and I still never managed to see this haunting motherfucker.

I have never seen such a terrifying Friend in all my days. I'm sure she was a perfectly normal-looking human in life, no judgement on Mary. And really no judgement on the sculptor, Sylvia Shaw Judson, either, she's a very good artist. It's just. What the fuck.

[ID: A photograph of the sculpture of Mary Dyer, one of Boston's "four martyrs"; her body is mostly in proportion as she sits on a bench wearing a plain dress and head covering. Her neck, however, is extremely long, as is her face, and something about the shape of the cheekbones above extremely deep-sunk eyes gives her a very Uncanny Valley aura.]

Mary Dyer's story is pretty interesting if you can stomach it. I'm perpetually surprised, though I shouldn't be, by how persecuted early Quakers were for the heresy of *checks notes* Believing in the dignity of all humanity, saying that being able to legally own another person was a bad thing, and being mostly very quiet while praying.

Like I do get it, Quaker belief tends to be in direct opposition to authority, but authority mostly sucks! The sheer terror they inspired through, basically, the act of being thoughtful, decent people seems deeply out of proportion.

(Amusingly, evangelicals still don't know what to do with Quakers much of the time. I've never seen a Baptist bluescreen as hard as the one who asked me if I'd like to come to his church and got the response "No thank you, I attend Quaker meetings." He just didn't know where to put that.)

That said, if someone who looked like this statue confronted me about bad behavior after a Meeting, I would flip the fuck out.

#mary dyer #boston history #quaker history #religion

[shortpplfedup]

Only Friends Character Rankings Episode 10

We're in the final act now, as Jojo n'em focus on 'Redemption'. Last week y'all tapped Nick as the most honest in reckoning with himself, and now it's everybody else's turn for a reckoning.

🔺1. Boeing (2)

You're totally his type. Like an upgraded version of me.

Walk in, fuck shit up, that's the Boeing way, and I am GAGGING for it. I don't have a clue who the target is or what his game is or exactly but he is playing it EXPERTLY. Is he trying to get Top back? Is he trying to get back at Top? Where does next week's Sand diversion fit in? DID HE AND MEW REVENGE FUCK I NEED TO KNOW?! (I ALSO NEED TO SEE!).

🔻2. Nick (1)

Don't we deserve each other?

Nikolai my stalker baby, why did my heart swell three sizes when you got your man? Honesty remains the best policy, and owning your own shit is a fast track to understanding and accepting others. Nick tried, he genuinely gave Daddy Dan an honest and fair chance, and it COULD have been something, but the heart wants what it wants and Nick's heart wants Boston. The look on his face when he saw his photo as Boston's lockscreen, the way he BAWLED when Boston admitted he missed him...peak romance I tell you.

🔺3. Boston (4)

I don't usually take good care of what I own.

I'm not really meta-ing about this show, but the PRECISION with which Jojo n'em sliced and diced the audience's slut-shaming ways via this character got me. I am INCANDESCENT on Boston's behalf that his so-called friends were so willing to believe Atom's nasty little lies. Because Boston might be a slut, and he might have gone a little Top crazy, and he might stir up some drama when he's feeling some typa way, but he's not a sexual predator, and HE DOESN'T LIE. And despite it all people who call themselves friends to him SHOULD know that. He shouldn't have fucked Atom yes, but Atom straight up asked to get fucked. Boston DOES have lessons to learn about controlling his impulses and filtering the things that come out of his mouth, but these hypocrites ain't the ones to teach him. I'm glad that Nick got over himself last week just in time to be there when Boston truly needed him, and I hope that if they decide to try a relationship that Nick keeps the letting-Boston-be-Boston energy he's discovered.

⭐4. Ray's Dad

Ray's Dad in his one prior appearance seemed like a man at the end of his rope, and I'm glad my thinking was borne out. This story keeps telling us that nobody is a monster, nobody is a villain, everybody is just a person, and Ray's dad is a person like all the rest of them: he cared about his wife, he's watched helplessly and increasingly angrily as his son went down the same path, but he didn't know how to get through to him because he's limited, as we all are, so he did a lot of the wrong thing. I don't think paying Sand to get Ray into rehab was the wrong thing though, that was the act of a desperate man. Him giving Ray the straight dope about how to treat people was a long overdue fatherly lesson. Has he been neglectful? Indubitably. But I'm rooting for him.

🔻5. Sand (3)

Do you think I’m a man with no dignity?

Sand is the beneficiary of me being salty about Mew and Ray joining the 'I saw Goodie Proctor with the devil' mini-mob, but I could have TOLD him that a man who continuously and repeatedly calls you a whore is going to believe the absolute worst about you when the chips are down. I'm lowkey mad he gave back the money, because Ray is gonna call him a whore whether or not he's getting paid. I know Sand lives for the drama sparkle Ray brings to his otherwise dull life, but come ON dude.

🔺6. Mew (7)

If you blow it again this time, I'll blame myself for being dumb enough to trust you.

Mew joining in the fun with Boeing is probably gonna bite him somehow but right now I am LIVINGGGGG. Mew keeping Top up at night staring at the ceiling on a regular basis is the only way I'm gonna truly enjoy them being together, because game recognising game is my favourite brand of toxic relationship. If these two spend the next 50 years trying to get one over on each other I will be so satisfied.

🔻7. Ray (5)

I'm not addicted to alcohol. I can stop whenever I want.

Ray spending the entire episode in various stages of denial, his irritation with the idea of rehab and refusal to take it seriously, that explosion that was ALWAYS coming at Sand, and his final, quiet realisation that he has a fucking problem and he needs to fix it to stop hurting the people around him was phenomenal television, anchored by a bravura performance by Khaotung. Ray is gonna have a lot of amends to make once he starts drying out, including saying everything he said to his therapist directly to Sand. Can he truly change? Let's see.

🔻8. Top (6)

I'm sure if he stops being mad at me, we can make it long-term.

I finally figured out why no matter what I'll NEVER like Top and he doesn't pass the vibe check: his instincts and reactions are to lie, hide and cheat when he doesn't feel on top of things. He and Boeing may not be fuckin', but whatever is going on there smells like deceit and mendacity, and he is DESPERATE to hide it from Mew. The look on his face when Boeing is around is exactly how he looked around Boston after that car. Give me an honest slut over whatever this is any day of the week and twice on Sundays. I keep saying that Mew is part of Top's self-actualization, and the way he talks about him with Boeing in this ep just adds fuel to my fire. Is that enough to sustain a long-lasting and successful relationship, absolutely, so many couples are JUST like this.

🔺9. Cheum (12)

Find your own way to graduate. And we will forget we were once friends with you.

OOH this girl pisses me off. Having finally decided to mind the business that pays her, mostly because she's annoyed Atom seems to prefer talking to Boston than talking to her, she's all too willing to believe Atom's lies about Boston and run up pointing her j'accuse finger. I genuinely can't get over how UGLY that scene at Boston's was, how Cheum pulled out some of the same shit that gets levelled at queer men, promiscuous or not, and threw it all at Boston. When she said she didn't believe that Atom was the aggressor because he likes girls, that hit me in the fucking chest. Boston must have done something to Atom. He must have coerced him, blackmailed him, forced him, right? It's so grotesque.

🔻10. Atom (9)

Getting my heart broken by a girl won't kill me.

Speaking of grotesque, what a nasty bit of business this was. Hurt people hurt people, that's kind of the whole ethos of this show, and the lies Atom told were designed to ruin Boston's life like he feels Boston ruined his by GIVING HIM EXACTLY WHAT HE ASKED FOR. I very much doubt Atom is gonna stop at Cheum too, he's out to destroy, and spreading around this kind of shit about somebody who's already judged for being 1) queer and 2) promiscuous is absolutely destructive. This shit was the vilest thing anybody has done on this show by a country mile.

#only friends the series #bless this mess #only friends weekly character rankings #i support gay wrongs #only friends #only friends series #bl meta series

[bosguy]

Making friends: Boston LGBTQ social groups

Looking to get out to make new friends or just be more active? Did you know Boston has 30+ LGBTQ+ social groups? Find one that sounds interesting and check'em out. They'd love to get to know you. #gayBoston

With the influx  of so many new residents at the start of each academic year, I like to update and share this post. If you are new to the area or looking to meet more people outside of a bar setting, the groups listed below might be a good first step.  If you don’t see relevant or up-to-date information in the links shared below, contact me, and I can help find a contact for that group to learn…

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#BAGLY. Boston Gay Men&039;s Chorus #Boston Gaymers #Boston LesBiGay Urban Foundation #Boston Prime Timers #Boston Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence #Boston Sober Gay Sundays #Dignity Boston #Fenway Health #Gay Beer Club #Gay for Good #Gays for Patsy #History Project #Keshet #LGBT Elders of Color #Mass Asian & Pacific Islanders #Mass Bears & Cubs #men of melanin magic #Mountain Tops #Naked Yoga for Men #Opus Affair #OUTbreath #Queer Boston Board Gamers #Yankee Cruising Club

[jimmyspades]

"My best friend has Alzheimer's... He is a grand lover of life, and will be for some time. I believe even when his mind starts to really go he'll still fish, he'll laugh and love. And as it progresses, he'll still want to live—because there'll be value for him in a friendship, in a cigar. The truth is, I don't think he'll ever come to me and say, 'This is the day I want to die.'

"But the day is coming. And he won't know it. This is perhaps the most insidious thing about Alzheimer's. But you see, he trusts me to know when that day has arrived. He trusts me to safeguard his dignity, his legacy and self-respect. He trusts me to prevent his end from becoming a mindless piece of mush. And I will. It will be an unbearably painful thing for me—but I will do it because I love him. I will end his suffering. Because it's the only decent, humane, and loving thing a person can do."

BOSTON LEGAL 4.16 "The Mighty Rogues"

#he trusts me he trusts me he trusts me and I will end his suffering because I love him #and so it goes #🦩 #james spader #alan shore #boston legal #* #william shatner #denny crane #this show is so much more than it needed to be #one of james’ best scenes ever. I love the SCOTUS ep but they should’ve submitted this as his emmy episode

[catominor]

a selection of scholarship about L. furius and C. martinus:

Station, Jessica. "'A dignity separate from the common crowd': Plutarch's Lucius Furius Camillus." Roman History 178, no. 4 (2000): 43-67.

Toast, John C. "Lucius Furius Camillus: A Prosopological Study." Classical Biannually 34, no. 1 (2005): 135-68.

Stone, Lydia. "Stoicism in the Age of Sulla: The Philosophical Fragmenta of Lucius Furius Camillus Revisited" in Studies in Roman Philosophy in the Republican Period, eds. Gary Boring and Harold Dairy, 450-521. (Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 2017)

Smithson, Christian. "Queering the Republic: Lucius Furius Camillus and Gaius Martinus." The Online Journal of LGBT Studies 10, no. 4 (2021): 89-104.

Dageurrotype, Stephen. "The Mind of an Ambitious Man: A Psychoanalytical Study of Gaius Martinus." Freudian Studies Daily 435, no. 7 (1976): 34-48.

Hartlewood, C.B.T. "The Work and Life of a Scholar and Nobleman: Lucius Camillus and the Republic." The Yearly Classical Journal of the Wavendon Gentleman's Club 13 (1914): 76-98.

Daquiri-Smith, Janet. "Reading Lucius Furius Camillus in Seneca's Epistulae Morales: A Complicated Legacy." in A Companion to Seneca's Epistulae Morales, 2nd ed. eds. Janet Daquiri-Smith and Ben Daiquiri, 480-503. (Newark: John Wiley & Sons, 2009)

Tank, John. "The Military Strategy of Gaius Martinus." in The Roman Republican Army, ed. William H. Conical, 256-304. (Boston: Brill, 2013)

#i love making things up. underrated pastime #there will be more of these (threat) also :) #ficposting

[liaromancewriter]

What Could Have Been

Series Premise: When Ethan breaks his promise, Cassie is forced to accept they’re not inevitable after all.

Book: Open Heart Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Cassie Valentine) Rating/Category: Teen. Angst Words: 680

Chapter 1: Promises Made. Promises Broken A return and the end of something special before it could begin.

A/N1: This series doesn’t follow my headcanon and is closer to book 2 canon. Like my hc, Ethan and Cassie are together briefly before he leaves for the Amazon. However in Lia Land, what happens after his return is always the divergence point.

A/N2: I'm using @choicesflashfics week 41, prompt 2

Her heart was broken, shattered like glass by his disdain. The words delivered in a cold, emotionless tone, sounding so unlike the man she’d fallen in love with.

For one second, Cassie Valentine wondered if it was a bad dream, like the kind she’d had while he was in the Amazon. All the doubts she tried to push away during the busy daylight hours had returned tenfold to haunt her dreams.

Where Ethan Ramsey falls for another woman, someone more beautiful and smarter than her. His equal in every way that she wasn’t. Despite their promises to each other in the departure hall of Boston’s Logan Airport and the night before in his bed.

“Consider us reset. I won’t cross boundaries with you again.”

But it wasn’t a dream. Ethan was deadly serious. Those blue eyes that had glittered with passion and laughter two months ago now stared at her so full of ice she shivered despite the warm summer night.

Everything he said tonight was logical. His concern for her career. His doubts about being able to push her to excel if they were involved romantically.

This was wrong, she thought, her heart rate accelerating as panic set in. This was not how their love story was supposed to be. They couldn’t just end before they’d had a chance to truly begin.

She’d promised to wait for him, and he’d vowed to come back to her. Only he hadn’t. He was breaking his promise as cruelly as he destroyed their love.

Cassie wanted to lean in, kiss his lips, remind him of what they meant to each other. But she held back. He had closed himself off from her. The distance in his stance was a slap in the face after everything they’d been through.

She felt the tears prick her eyes and knew she was close to breaking down. To beg Ethan to change his mind. Take her back.

But Ethan looked away from her, turning back to his drink.

Her gaze zigzagged across the empty beer garden, taking in every detail. The persistent flicker of a single light bulb. The sad tune of a country song drifting from the jukebox inside.

She needed to leave. To walk away with her dignity intact. They said love and hate were two sides of the same coin. And now she knew how true that was.

“Okay,” she said, clearing her throat. Her voice was gruff from unshed tears. “I get it. I’ll see you tomorrow, Dr. Ramsey.”

Cassie forced herself to slide off the bench, turn around and walk back inside.

She had no idea how she made it as far as the T station before the tears began to fall. Functioning on autopilot, she stepped inside the subway car that pulled into the platform and stepped off when she reached her station.

She wrapped her arms around herself and began the two-block walk home.

Home. She just had to get home, and everything would be fine.

She put one step before the other until she ran up the brownstone steps and into the elevator.

Quietly unlocking the apartment door, she breathed a sigh of relief at the silence and low light in the hallway. It meant everyone else had gone to bed, and she was saved from having to explain the state she was in.

Cassie shuffled to her bedroom and closed the door, leaning against it for a few seconds. She took deep breaths, but a low wailing sound escaped her lips. An indescribable grief descended upon her like a shadow, and tears cascaded hotly down her cheeks.

She believed they were inevitable, destined to be together despite the odds. But now she knew it was as false as his promises to her.

Not everything can be butterflies and rainbows. Things get hard sometimes. That’s just how it is, she thought, hardening her heart.

She stretched out on the bed and willed herself to dream of what was because tomorrow was the first day of the rest of her life without Ethan and what could’ve been.

-----------------

All Fics & Edits: @annfg8 @bluebelle08 @coffeeheartaddict2 @crazy-loca-blog @doriopenheart @genevievemd @headoverheelsforramsey @lucy-268 @jamespotterthefirst @jerzwriter @lady-calypso @mainstreetreader @peonierose @potionsprefect @queencarb @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @socalwriterbee @takemyopenheart @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction

Submissions: @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

Ethan & Cassie only: @cariantha @custaroonie @hopelessromantic1352 @mrs-ramsey

#open heart #open heart choices #ethan ramsey #ethan ramsey x mc #choices open heart #playchoices #choices fic writers creations #cfwc fics of the week #open heart fanfics #open heart fanfiction #choices fanfiction #writers on tumblr #choices fanfics #ethan ramsey x cassie valentine

[sgiandubh]

Jottings: Season 7, Episode 4. Well then, best not die

As Tom Christie would say, "the Lord does answer prayer, you know": this week has been indeed bigger, better, brighter and more. Tissues might or might not be needed - it's up to you to decide (fun fact, I almost did), but ice cream is a must (steamy moments ahead, ahem).

Back at Lallybroch the pixies broke the alarm clock-cum-radio, while someone is wiping his nauseous mouth with the Declaration of Independence in Wilmington. And there can be no greater contrast when it comes to casting, than the one between SS and Vandervaart. She is trying, bless her heart she does, and it shows a lot. Yet no matter how hard she does it, she will never overcome, I am afraid, that stilted delivery and that genuine uneasiness that make you feel alternatively dismissive and sorry for her. In the economy of Outlander, SS is more than a waste: she is a casualty, because she managed to unwillingly kill Bree, a character with a difficult, often unsympathetic design to start with.

For his first substantial on-screen appearance, Vandervaart passed my scrutiny with flying colors. Now I might be biased, because I am a documented victim of this particular Boston Brahmin charm, that screams old money and boat shoes and Ivy League and effortless sophistication. But it's more than this, of course, and I suspect solid brains and a great deal of preparatory work. This kid has managed to impress me, with his subtle nods to the mannerisms of JAMMF and LJG. The scene with Young Ian and Rollo is flawless. The diction is perfect. He cares for William enough to become William and this is something to behold and applaud.

Both Hunters are quintessential. There is a sort of steel butterfly quality to Rachel and Denzell Hunter's kindness could melt my B&J's Chocolatey Love A-Fair bucket on the spot. Their likeability index will probably increase with time, and not only in this fandom, but also in the silent majority of casuals.

Which brings me to Tom Christie brilliantly showing us that, as my beloved Wilde once said with perfect clarity, "every saint has a past and every sinner has a future". This is the moment when I almost reached for the tissues, because I once was Tom Christie, and I know how damn hard is to keep your dignity in a hope against hope situation. And I could have done without that burlesque kiss altogether: but that is just me.

We've been waiting for this one since the trailer was released or even since I Am Not Alone. At last some bedroom maneuvers that are not: a) scampered; b) implied; c) muted and faded to cheesiness. I didn't even ask for much, did I?

Spoiler: "The thing about Tom is he wants you. Badly." That golden light. That serene grace. That perfect dialogue of bodies and souls. That cheeky raspiness. Not about Tom and not exactly JAMMF. I almost shivered, it was just like the good old times. And then, BAM!

A PLAGUE ON YOUR HOUSE, INTIMACY COORDINATOR VANESSA WOMAN, WHOSE NAME I DO NOT EVEN BOTHER TO GOOGLE AT 03:55 AM LOCAL TIME.

YOU SET OUR HOPES HIGH, PUSHED US TO THE EDGE AND THEN HAD THEM FADE TO THAT TOTALLY CLICHE MIRROR TRANSITION. HELLO? YOU FEEL OK WHEN YOU LOOK AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR, WHILE YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH?

Enough said. And the next lost soul who darts out of Mordor with rumors of body doubles can go directly to jail, not pass GO (heh), not collect $200.

Is next week the Singapore (Sling) one? Lucky I am still in town, then. That is a mystery in the waiting. Onwards.

(Gif taken from @divineandmajesticinone, credits given accordingly - great work!)

#jottings