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#I hate the reality of it honestly
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Please let Astarion meet Tav's family and have a younger sibling like 6 be like im gonna marry the prince points at Astarion.
Tav : Sorry, im married to the prince
NO IM GONNA MARRY THE PRINCE
That's so fucking cute kill me. But I just realized AFTER I finished it I read this wrong 😭😭 I read it as "marry" instead of "married" so whoops now it's an asking for your hand in marriage fic.
Also, I'm going to make this a weird little, unofficial, alternate reality, off shoot of this fic to explain away why Astarion can be in the sun without ascending because I am ~lazy~
Quick summary if you didn't read it, Tav serves Selune, gets a blessing for all the good work, and uses it to cure the anti-light issue of the vampirism (but not all of it). It's not a literal extension of that fic but I'm stealing my own plot explanations. That's it! Now here we go:
~
Astarion wasn't nervous per se. He was just... on edge. And the two-week journey it took to get here wasn't helping things, not when it gave him so much time to ruminate in his thoughts. He never expected to be in the position of "meeting the family," let alone in anticipation for asking for someone's hand in marriage.
Astarion wasn't even quite sure how his life got here. He had always fantasized that a life without Cazador would be one of selfish hedonism, not one where he would be legitimately concerned about a damn six year old sibling's first impression of him.
But then you came along, effortlessly shattering all of his grandiose plans with a batt of your eyelashes. Perhaps the entire journey of falling in love was more complicated, but it felt like it was that simple. In hindsight, he never stood a chance against you, but it was hilarious that there was a time he ever thought he did.
All of his prior dreams and fantasies felt like nothing in comparison to just being with you. It had been a year since you both saved the Sword Coast, a beautiful, fantastic year. That had ended with him somehow more in love with you now than when he first confessed. Selune's blessing had certainly helped with that he was sure. He still couldn't quite believe that you would use a god's blessing on him of all people, but gods, was he appreciative. Because being able to walk in the sun again meant that he could live the life he wanted, with no restrictions. He could be the partner you deserved, the kind that a father would happily say yes to when asking for your hand.
Which brought him back to his current dilemma. Perhaps he hadn't seen any of your family members in the time you'd been together, but he had heard plenty. You loved them all to death, especially your little sister. You wrote to them constantly, the mere sight of a letter from your parents enough to put you in a great mood for the rest of the day. He was aware that your mother was supposedly a saint, a fact that your own father had instilled in you often. He knew that they had a wonderful, loving marriage and were both higher ups in the Church of Selune. A fact that Astarion didn't particularly enjoy.
As grateful to the moon goddess as he was, he was aware that you were an expectation to the very normal belief that vampires were bad. And that marrying one was one of the stupidest things you could ever do from an average person's perspective, let alone a Selunite.
Why you hadn't done the smart thing and lied about what he was, Astarion would never know. But he did know that the thought of their rejection over his admittedly sordid history was putting him in a tailspin.
"They're going to love you," You said for the hundredth time, giving his hand a squeeze as you led him up the steps to your childhood home, "You have nothing to worry about sweetheart. I promise."
Astarion highly doubted that, but you were already knocking on the front door before he had a chance to argue. The door instantly slammed open, a beaming child already launching themselves at you before Astarion could process what was happening.
But you were more prepared them he was. You effortlessly caught them in your arms, laughing at their excited shouting, "Titi! You're late!"
So this was the famous Arabeth.
"No, I'm not!" You laughed as you settled her on your hip, "And what happened to my little girl's manners huh? You haven't even introduced yourself yet."
The child glanced over at him, like she was just realizing for the first time that someone else was standing over there. She looked a little shocked at the sight of him, staring at him with wide eyes. Wide enough for Astarion to start to wonder if something was on his face.
He gave her a little wave only for her to bury her face into your shoulder, peeking out at him with her lips pursed. Which was not the best start to the whole making his darling's family actually like him plan.
"Well, as you've probably guessed this is Arabeth. She's just a little shy," You reassured as you stepped inside, muttering a quick invitation inside under your breath. He appreciated that, he didn't need the whole house to be reminded of his... limitations.
"But she'll get over it soon enough," You continued as you called into the house, "Mom? Dad? We're here!"
And just like that they were rushing into the room, acting just as excited as your sister had been. Your mother wasted no time in smothering your face with kisses while your father swept you up into a hug. It was a rather impressive display of coordination, considering how they hadn't managed to knock you and your sister to the floor in the process. Astarion was pretty sure they were both saying something along the lines of We missed you! But it was hard to tell with all of you so tangled up in each other.
It was heartwarming to see, in all honestly. Of course such a loving person would come from an equally loving family, what else would he expect?
Though he certainly hadn't been expecting for your mother to throw her arms around him next. She brought him into a tight hug before looking him up and down, "So you're Astarion huh?"
She turned back to you, grinning ear to ear with her hands set on Astarion's shoulders, "He's so handsome! Selune help us, do you remember the last boy you brought home? He had a nose the length of my arm-"
"And that's enough of that," You said with a strained laugh, pulling your eccentric mother back a few inches, "And we've talked about the impromptu hugs. What happened to asking for permission?"
"Sorry, sorry!" She said with a wave of her hand, "Let me try again. I'm Seliras, and this is my husband-"
"Marcoul," Your father interrupted, putting his hand out for Astarion to shake, "It's been awhile since we've met a boyfriend."
"He's a little more than that," You said with a sigh as everyone exchanged pleasantries.
"We'll be the judge of that," Marcoul said with a sharp but friendly grin, the grip he had on Astarion's hand briefly tightening before he let go, "From what we've heard, you're quite the character aren't you?"
Ah, so the interrogating was starting early then. It was nothing that Astarion hadn't expected. Besides, turning up the charm was his strong suit, even when he was uncharacteristically nervous.
Astarion smiled back at him, "You've heard right. And I'm more than happy to answer any questions you might have."
"Oh gods please don't say that," You groaned, but it was too late. Your parents were already leading him to sit, rapid-fire questions coming out of their mouth.
Where are you from? How did you meet? Are you serious about our Tav? What's your religion? Where's your family? What are your plans?
But Astarion answered them all, with only mild censorship for the child's sake. The child who suddenly couldn't stop staring at him. It wasn't exactly easy to sell himself as a future husband when he was a vampiric ex-slave, but he made do.
It was an overwhelming experience to say the least, but not necessarily an unpleasant one. That was one good thing about trying to marry into a family of zealots, it was a lot easier to convince them of your virtue when you received a personal blessing from their goddess.
By the end of the night, they were all throughly appeased, enough so to get off the topic of him for a moment.
"You look a little young to have a thirty-year old child," Astarion said to your mother. He was actively trying to compliment her for obvious reasons, but he was also genuinely curious. She barely looked a day over 40.
"Oh we breed young," She said with a laugh, "We had Tav in our teenage years. Arabeth came much, much later. Our favorite little surprise. Gods, I can't think of a single person in our family who didn't have kids young. Our little Tav is the only exception to the rule."
"But maybe not for much longer, huh?" Marcoul added with a grin, yelping when you lightly smacked him over the head for the comment.
"Do not start the kid talk again!" You hissed out, cheeks red, "We've talked about this!"
Astarion couldn't help but grin at your reaction, charmed by your embarrassment. Though... the idea of the two of you having children together sure was an interesting thought.
Astarion felt a tug on his sleeve while you were distracted arguing with your parents. He turned, smiling when he saw your little sister standing there, still staring at him with wide-eyes.
She took a deep breath before blurting out, "You look like a prince. Are you?"
"Not exactly," Astarion said with a small laugh. That couldn't be further from the truth, "There's no blue blood in my veins."
She frowned, cocking her head at him like he wasn't making any sense. But then an idea obviously struck her as she excitedly asked, "But if you married a princess, then you'd become a prince too. Right?"
"I suppose?" Astarion answered with a shrug.
"So if I become a princess, and I marry you, then you'll be a prince?"
This conversation was quickly becoming out of his depth. But luckily enough for him you were swooping in to save him.
You laughed at her question, turning your attention back to the two of them, "No offense Bethy, but I'm going to be the one marrying this particular prince."
But Arabeth wasn't having it. She crossed her arms, looking at you like she was the one talking to a child, "You can't. Because if I don't marry him, he won't be a prince. So there. I have to do it."
She looked so serious, her facial expressions incredibly similar to your own. Astarion was holding back a loud laugh as you tried and failed to reason with her, "I can marry him without the royal status-"
"No! I'm marrying the prince!"
Your parents were doing a much worse job at hiding their reactions, both of them opening giggling behind their hands as you came up with a compromise.
"Okay, okay," You said with a sigh, kneeling down to look the small girl in the eye, "How about this? I marry him first. But only until you become a princess. Then he's all yours. Sound fair?"
She thought about it for a moment before nodding to herself, "Sounds fair."
Well Astarion wasn't going to get a better set-up then that. He turned to your father, his nerves coming back for a brief appearance, "I'm assuming now might be a good time to ask what I came here to ask. Though I do promise I only intending on asking for one of your children's hand in marriage."
Marcoul nodded slowly, his face unreadable as he spoke, "I mean no offense when I say this Astarion, but you aren't exactly who I imagined for my daughter."
"Dad don't-"
"Darling, let him finish," Astarion gently interrupted, his eyes still locked with your father's.
He took a deep breathe before continuing, "That said, I've never seen her so... herself with someone else before. So yes. The two of you can marry. On one condition."
"Anything," Astarion said instantly, nearly giddy at the fact that he was so close to the official yes, "Just name it."
"You have to have the wedding here," Seliras answered for him, a massive smile on her face, "No ifs, ands, or buts."
"And I get to be flower girl!" Arabeth chimed in, her past indignation completely forgotten as she climbed all over you, "And there has to be chocolate cake!"
"Oh gods, help us," You groaned, but Astarion was already nodding along. He couldn't give less than two shits where it happened or who was involved. He could scarcely believe that it was happening at all. But that was the last thing he had needed.
He already had the ring, the most amazing person he could ever fathom being with. Who actually wanted him back.
Now all he had to do was ask.
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priceofreedom · 3 months
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funny how everyone seemed to adore Zack until he started having more screentime...
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hacked-wtsdz · 2 months
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So tired of jk rowling demonisation. Yeah the woman hates trans people. She also spent amounts most of y’all have never seen on humanitarian causes and charities. She is not a one hundred percent horrible person deserving of shunning. Are people allergic to nuance
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i don't know how to put this into words exactly but I'm not really happy where i'm at job wise rn. it feels like pulling teeth for me to work right now. and that's kind of the opposite of who i am as a person - i'm an overworker usually. and that's probably a good thing to get a break from that aspect of my personality (bc why overwork for the boss man amirite) but also...... i'm just not happy?
and i can't tell what exactly it's stemming from - if it's the people (tbh doubtful, i like everyone but i also have no super bestie work friend like i've had at prev jobs), or the work itself (which I used to love doing), or the industry (i have been in it a long time), or maybe it is where i work (which tbh is a pretty good place to work so again doubtful?) - or if it's nothing to do with my job and all to do with other stuff going on in my life?
idk i'm just..... I feel kind of bored and over it. like i usually hit this wall when I feel like there's nothing more to learn at where i'm at but that's not quite what's happening. there's still a lot to learn - but I'm just not sure i want to learn it.
and until i know what the hell the exact issue(s) are here i don't feel confident to go looking for the next job. because I would likely end up in a worse place until i know what is up.
anyhow any advice isn't necessary but appreciated because i'm feeling odd about the whole thing.
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nooks-cranny-mogai · 2 months
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Anyway, as an alloaro, greyromantic, aceflux and non-communal Aro: Happy Valentine's day. You are not "Aro/ace/Aroacephobic" for celebrating your love. You are not doing Valentine's Day wrong if your celebrating your platonic love or love for yourself instead of a romantic and/or sexual partner. You're not hurting fellow LGBT people by enjoying your love and celebrating it. Valentine's Day can mean many things for many people.
And for those who will spend today tearing them down, trauma dumping, complaining, calling people aphobes or other insults for celebrating or trying to claim this day is unnecessary and exclusionary.... I hope you heal. I hope you can learn to love yourself.
And when your done healing, I hope you learn that some things just arnt about you and just because they arnt, doesn't make them bad. It sucks to not feel personally included in a wildly celebrated holiday but many people survive st. Patrick's without being Irish, Easter without being Christian and the 4th of July without being American or having American pride. This isn't any different and you don't have to like Valentine's Day, but understand for many gay couples, interracial couples, trans couples, interfaith couples, polycules and so many other people whose love is oppressed and destroyed, this day is a day for them to show their love.
No one likes a Grinch.
#clover speaks#im trying to be so nice but my fellow aroaces act like fucking christians during halloween or when hannakah is mentioned#it all dosent sound as deep as you think it is and its abit lowkey annoying#they try and pull up thanksgiving to natives and i want to scream as an aro native#not even lowkey high key fucking annoying#i understand your struggles but fr? its not even offensive to us it just dosent include us#and my whole community turns into but what about meeee 🥺🥺🥺#it aint about us and that dosent make it bad or exclusionary#if valentines day makes you hate yourself thats a sekf hate problem not others#get your shit together in therapy aint no body elses problem#just one block of the reasons why im non communal and its so irritating#you sound self centered and hostile and nothing they put forward as reasons to why the holiday is supposedly#problematic are actual reasons other than it hurty their fweelings they arnt incwuded#grow the fuck up yall act like toddlers at a kissing scene like 90% of the time and its so fuckin annoying#not even in a cringe way just in a completely disconnected from reality not seen the sun in 5 years way#its not cute and you make no sense at best and at worst come off so terminally online i cant stand it#anti fuck anti Valentine's day people all my aro homies hate their pretentious victim complex asses#this blog is pro Valentine's day#honestly im making a bigger deal out of it than it is but the thin veil some aros aces and aroaces wear to hide their#boiling hate for allos in their lives and for love and for other aros aces and aroaces who like love is some puritan ass shit#i see you in there :)#ur being fukin weird :)#you look like you said some questionable shit to lesbians in 2018 :) /neg#the type that think a lesbian icon equals terf or all lesbians are aphobes type shit#i remember that era but i aint gettin into it#no thank you 💀#that was traumatizing#clover vents#clover hates#i will turn this post into a block chain if need be dont test me
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piplupod · 25 days
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i need to lie down and curl into a ball and tuck myself into a box and be gently lowered into the earth i think. and just stay there for a few days... years... however long it needs to be until i can exist without feeling like i am a prey animal being hunted for sport every day !!!!!!!
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colorful-horses · 1 year
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Seriously got so heated thinking about High Guardian Spice again that I wrote a whole video essay script about it. A whole script about a show that nobody cares about anymore. I've got brainrot
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unboundpower · 7 months
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❝ Seeing more and more people actually think that dating isn't meant to last, it "only ever ends in marriage or just ends", makes me pretty thankful Vegito isn't ignorant like that. ❞
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spring-lxcked · 5 months
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wait coming back just to add that i was thinking abt the generational element of the af.tons just being a fucked up family line and i'm. fine. i swear i'm f
#—— ✧ ooc »#˖ ✧ headcanon » ( the demon to his demons )#william's partially a shitty father because of who he is but also partially because of his own upbringing#tries to escape it but either overcorrects or falls into it anyway#terrified of becoming his parents and both passes and fails to escape becoming them#geninely honestly despite everything wants to be better then them and can't and won't#and his parents were shit to him and jayne because they were following social roles#didn't necessarily want kids but It's Expected & although william would never admit it they instilled that in him#& he DID want kids but in many ways the family he tries to build initially is The Stereotypical American Dream#suburb house white picket fence small town wife and three children both sons and a daughter etc etc etc#doesn't let this idea go until late-stage and by that point he's already unintentionally destroying it anyway#i know i made a haha funny joke abt his ideal fam of henry & the son he loves/hates & 2 robot children#but unironically him realizing that he can & should choose what/who he wants BECAUSE he wants it/them#would have solved so many problems if he'd realized it earlier#not all of them but lmao#(not implying that he didn't love elise/mrs. af.ton but he didn't go into or HANDLE the marriage how he should have)#(everything was about appearances not abt actually being prepared for like. Married Life.)#(very much thinks 'okay i'm married. hard part's over. no more effort required' & obv ends up divorced because of it)#(which to be clear he is prone to in ANY ship if they're not willing to beat him over the head w/ reality HARD)#there's SO much more to say abt this like it's very complex but i'm gonna go chill and then go to sleep lmao
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broflovski-brah · 6 months
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legitimate question
am i good enough?
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luckyfailure · 2 years
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matilda and mob psycho 100 are the only works of art ever about gifted children. i'm not interested about the rest.
#i love how their powers do carry the narrative but in a way that is so them#to pursue the things that are right to them#i also love how the adults in there are portrayed for different reasons#matilda is like yeah kids it is right to hate your parents. a power fantasy for me honestly#and mp100 has reigen fucking arataka. who is also shown to be in the wrong but has genuine love for this kid AND shows it#their messages are also opposite but not exactly?#matilda calls for rebellion against unfair adults from a kid standpoint. something i feel gifted kids perceive even more deeply#but it ends with her making a genuine connection with someone who sees her and gets her the accomodations she needs#making her quote unquote normal#and mob psycho 100 is explicitly about a gifted neurodivergent kid who got really lucky#his family supports his weirdness and never pushed the special one title on him#reigen also does this and also teaches him to see it as just one thing he happens to be good at#and yet he hides it bc he's aware it's not just superpowers what he has#in the same way gifted kids aren't only just smart a lot of the time. it's also a difference in perception of reality#and his character arc is insanely compassionate bc of this luck he had#and also filling in the aspects of himself that were hard for him to explore and grow in bc of what makes him different#this wholesomeness can only happen bc the ppl surrounding him are mostly kind#matilda's revenge is the only way she can fight to protect herself due to the environment she's in#they are both very close to me <3
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system-of-a-feather · 10 months
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Man, since we are hard reset back to our brain power being allocated to XIV and I more than "the big picture" I actually have brain power to think on my shit again and man
XIV doesnt let me* have SHIT** in this house
*Doesn't let me = Allows me as long as I want and lets me hide in my corner and run as long as I want on the understanding that I have to admit Im hiding, choosing to ignore it, being a coward and accept that he will always peanut gallery me until I get tired of hearing the same thing over and over and give up on running
**Shit = A perpetual and forever state of avoiding and running away from things about myself and the reality of my complex existence due to factually having been through trauma and thus allowing said avoidance to control, restrain and stagnate any growth to my happiest and best self even if said thing I am running from I could factually easily handle if I JUST STOPPED RUNNING
But damn it I'll admit it here so
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frogcoded · 8 months
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that shit fucks with your brain so much though like the other day i was out with some people from uni and one of my friends made a comment about how i was the only girl out of a dozen people and i'm just like so used to this shit that i hadn't even noticed ???? like that's just how i exist when i'm at uni
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pyromaniac-cyndaquil · 8 months
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pmd chatot for blorbo bingo? ^^
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He's a silly rabbit. I love him
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hyunebear · 11 months
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my top 3 rn are: collision, get lit, & hall of fame
#adri.fav#skz's#5-star#fnf and item are two close calls#no honestly this whole album is a no-skip like what they've put out since#i have so many favorite parts in each song that just tickles my brain in a very unique and distinct way#first of all. the TRUMPETS in collision han jisung u are fucking insane i need to kiss his brain and him on the mouth#also ever since the unveil for get lit i have never stopped obsessing w that bass drop i can't wait to own big ass speakers#so i can get mad w that track#hyunjin's SWERVE SWERVE part i HATE him#hall of fame. what more can i say the chorus sold me immediately#but the entire concept of it is just so genius and the fact that it's the intro?????? we love her i love her#so many lines and parts in that song are my favorite bc why is felix singing “Shaking the industry Quaking reality”#is the exact representation of what they've been doing now.#now we're gonna talk abt s-class. jisung's verse. the dance break. i have more. i needed a few days to recover from that and#it's actually the perfect tt for this cb#item. it's a song where no other group can recreate or do. period.#THE BINSUNG PART?????????? pussy part thank u i lost my shit entirely#superbowl. no i'm not gonna talk abt this song. NEXT#topline has met and exceeded all my expectations it's incredible. they way they talked abt multiple kinds of lines and#incorporating it into the song????????? god their lyricism is always on point#i had to like go back to see where was tiger jk in that song bc the transition from him to jisung was so smooth they sounded like one perso#dlc. changbin i love u#this song makes me wanna just be gay and do crimes. literally#fnf i love her so much she's a blessing#reading the lyrics to this was so bittersweet and like i watched the intro and having multiple interpretations to it#makes it even more heartbreaking#the bit towards the end w minho singing is sososososo beautiful#youtiful. my skz.................... she's such a pretty and healing song and so straightforward and sincere#nah it's no big deal i definitely did not cry over her like a baby
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