#I'm just very tired of everything rn lol

[tardis--dreams]

There's silverfish in this apartment so the only chance for my body to get some rest would be collapsing from exhaustion otherwise i will not sleep for a While

#how long does it take to get rid of them? #ages probably #and i have only one room (+ a tiny bathroom) so i cannot avoid them #they're in my bedroom therefore the bed isn't safe #god i hate it here #i had them in my first apartment too for a short time and i hoped to never experience this again #well #also the guy living here before me apparently has never cleaned the shower or the toilet in his lifetime #the shower is filthy and I've been cleaning it for 3 hours in total already #I'll have to scrub it everyday in order to get a chance to get rid of these years of dirt and limescale #(like scrub it for 30 minutes using cleaning supplies and all. not just clean it after showering like usually #which would have prevented this from happening in the first place if that guy had done this even just once a week) #also cannot fathom how my landlord accepted this bathroom to be left like this #there was literally still toilet paper in the toilet and there is dirt so bad i haven't gotten rid of it after scrubbing for hours #but yeah #the insects are the worst #i mean in korea i had actual bugs but there weren't as many and i think they couldn't climb the walls so i felt less #disgusted by my bed and everything i touch #(there was one in my bag and in the kitchen sink and in my blanket once and #I'm not exactly scared by them but actually disgusted #i guess this is what some people mean when they say they aren't scared of spiders but don't like them anyway #it's just gross and i don't want to see them) #and i will tell my landlord about it and ask if he can at least fix the bathroom silicom so maybe some of their hiding spots are gone #I'm just very tired of everything rn lol #still not using that extra time i have during the night to work for university so that's great #not getting anywhere #void screams

[ferberus-skull]

quick sketch of Renwick (he/they), the not-cat nestor gave me today :]

#not fr #pce #pixel cat's end #my art #sketch #pce: renwick #i've only had renwick for about 5 hours but i am Obsessed with him #he's the world's biggest gothic literature enthusiast <3 #also hi. i'm alive lol #just not being very active rn. i am. So Tired. #and btw i'm changing the way i tag my not-cats #just in case i end up getting a dragon with the same name as a not-cat or vice versa #honestly i'd do the same for my dragons with a fr: name format #but uh. i'm. i'm not doing that. that's too much work to change everything #sure i have xkit and can do the tag replacer #but i still have too many dragons #it would still take a while

[piplupod]

juno thinking they're being stupid for being stressed all the time in certain online spaces and I take a quick scroll stroll through the spaces they inhabit daily and nah man. that shit is fucking insane. people say the boldest bullshit you've ever seen in the most inflammatory aggressive way; no wonder you're on the verge of a nervous breakdown constantly, especially if this is your main source of social interaction holy shit dude how do you deal with that on a daily basis

#chase on the mic #rewriting my tags because I don't like the way I was wording things #this isn't vaguing anything specifically lol it's like... a bunch of things that i'm bundling into one pissy post rn #maybe this is stupid of me (esp for ME to say lmao) but I think the better way of handling a lot of this shit is to just surround yourself- #-with better people lmao #angry ranting is great and all but you're not going to get very far with that #its just going to make spaces turn a lot more hostile in a few different ways #people get suspicious of each other and start snapping at each other and pointing fingers in random directions #what is a lot more effective is to make a well worded post and then display the behaviour you're wanting to see more of #yknow what actually. maybe that's not even true lmfao that's some cheesy ass shit #I don't know what I'm fucking talking about. that sounds like some shit juno would think up christ i'm going soft LMAO #maybe people do need to yell and bitch about things to get anywhere with certain communities #I think maybe this is another scenario of black and white thinking lmao there's a time and place for everything #i WILL say though. that the yelling and snarling is tiring when it comes from ppl who want interaction #and then have a really stupid thing on their DNI. lmao. lol even. I guess I can't rb your posts because you're shitty towards bigender ppl #your loss 🤷‍♂️

[corpsoir]

i think i might take a few days off from tumblr 👍 dont worry i'm fine and i'm still here i just need a short break

#whatever #i'll be back with more things soon maybe?? just give me a couple of days i'm feeling kinda blue rn lol #it'll pass i promise i know how to deal with myself #also had a really fucked up blog interact with my art and now i feel super super weird about everything and i want to burn everything #hhhujghghh. sorry #i really do like posting my art here but i lose the motivation to do so because so many just. dont reblog stuff #and i dont want to sound whiny and annoying about it but i just feel like stuff i make just. idk whatever #i'll be back shortly lol i couldn't leave if i wanted to #i just uuuuhhhh need a moment. im very tired and stressed and sick of gross people showing up here #both in my notes and on friends blogs and whatever #like. i shouldnt let things get to me but it does #there was a n/azi blog liking my art the other day and it made me feel so sick i dont even know what to say #i just. you know i think i need a break from feeling like i gotta check tumblr all the time #im constantly on edge on here because i dont want yucky people on here #and i feel horrible about it idk. #sorry for the 5000 miles of tags here

[keeps-ache]

ouhhhrh i'm hongry ouhuhuhuhuhruhg

#just me hi #girl help the only thing i've eaten today i a flour tortilla and it tasted like plastic #the taste isn't that important to what i'm saying here but it was crucial to the experience #/'m in the Shaky phase rn lol #waiting for ma to get back with food but until then i guess i'll die lol #//also we're moving soon which is cool !! #so i'll prolly have even less time to do fun things hvshbfhj #i hate moving so much so so much but that's ok. only a couple more times and i'm never going to live anywhere else again. lollll #i need a home base again or i'm going to explode and blow up the sun #//but anyway guess who's written 3 chapters in their new thingamabob!!! i'm so proud of myself :DD #i wish i could work on p1nk or even b1ue space but that's ok lol‚ step by step #//actually i take that back i need a home base that i can lock every other person on the planet out of #i'm so tired hvbhfhjhdsj #maybe a bunker! that'd be nice #oh but there'd be no sun :( i hate the sun but i like light so #so maybe like a tower! but i'm scared of heights so maybe not lol #maybe just a house :) 1 story cuz i don't like stairs very much hhhfv #//i'm hungry and i just deleted like 5 tags rn hhvfbjbfaf #i should prolly also have wortor but also. yo quiero comedo fvfhvbhsfsjd #i'm gonna explode into tons of tiny shreds of metal that get into Everything #not glitter. splinters of metal #/hongry :/

[vimbry]

drains collapsed. under house

#we've had on and off plumbing issues for like 2 months now & this is why. so #no clear reason why probably just. you know age and wear. uk sewer system's old and garbage #my parent & I have had flu also which I still have a lingering cough/feel tired from #anddd we haven't been speaking to my grandparents (who we prev saw like. once a week) for about the same length as the plumbing issue #after they did something pretty selfish and thoughtless and are the type too proud to apologise/want everyone to move on #so now we're at a stalemate bc we're still hurt and it's like. even if we do move past it #I still view them differently now. you know? family disappointing you really leaves you feeling empty #I already went nc with my other parent in 2019 cause they suck and then my dog died in 2020 #just feel like I'm slowly running out of people in my immediate circle esp with pandemic limitations #and this is just like. a whole thing now on top of the existing energy crisis to worry about #also someone stole our recycling bin LMAO like I put it out for collection a few days ago and now it's just gone dk where it is #which is not that big a deal you can just order another for free but it's like. why'd you have to do that man #I want to be grateful for what I've got knowing people are living through warzones and famine rn but like #I'm very weak and things mess me up easily I won't lie #that information only makes things worse. I mean each year everything just gets worse around the world. #it's already blisteringly hot each summer I just don't feel very. hopeful about anything anymore #I've just been really depressed #I guess the good thing is not caring about anything means I don't even particularly care about venting this online lol #it's hard to feel any cringeworthiness or insecurity over anything when you're not feeling anything at all

[noxtivagus]

PEOPLE ARE SO INTERESTING

#🌙.rambles #hi 2 am rambles but tonight i am loving life #dear diary (lol) i am tired n i have lost a lot of energy after this very good day n i will sleep soon #bro idk what i'm writing rn i just ate a cookie n thought about people #cookie.... i am so full rn it's a big cookie 😭😭 it's so delicious though. i really want to learn how to bake someday #but i wonder. i was wondering how you all perceive me here #bcs looking at a mix of who i am in discord. tumblr. twitter. spotify. all those have differences imo #discord you'd see the way i text with others? the things i share. the things i send. the words i say #personally for me reflecting on the things i often say to ppl n it serves as a reaffirmation honestly that i genuinely am kind at heart #i love telling others kind things. that makes me happy. saying good morning n good night n take care n sleep well n rest well #i just find it so interesting. everything. i think about so much things in life on a daily basis #and if anyone were to really. reach close enough to the deepest parts of me #there's a lot of pain definitely but i think someone would see a girl filled with so much love for life #i'm getting off-topic but god i am constantly so confused n lost but i still am strong. i'm proud of who i am. of my mindset #i love who i am. i love the things i desire. and the way i work towards my goals #and not just me. for everyone else. i'm gna cry #i already am 🥹 it often hurts bcs i'm really so. i feel very deeply #so when i. when i struggle n feel so alone it hurts me so much because at times it gets so hard to break out of that even tho i know better #there's so much to love about life but there's so little time too #maybe in my head i can be a little too idealistic at times but. at the same time i know i've gone through so much pain already #that feeling of betrayal. of being forgotten. left behind. god i'm crying even more remembering about all those nights #so. as long as i hold unto myself. unto everything i have ever loved. that will spur me onwards. that i may forge ahead unto tomorrow #the same things i analyze of myself like. the things i said at first here. i think of everyone else as well #how would it be like to live life through your own eyes? with your thoughts and experiences and emotions? #you see. there's really so much to life. and that's what i always remember when i feel like dying #like genuinely i have. felt so. down and sad that i have thought about it. wishing i could just. but i don't want. anyone to worry #my love for the people in my life kept me going when i hated myself so much #god n i. i'm crying so much wait. that's why i want to give so much kindness to others too #i'm crying. i love the night so much bcs i love being open and authentic like this so much but most of the time i get afraid honestly

[the-s1lly-corner]

Platonic tadc cast with a child reader Who is like :

"hey, wanna see me do a cartwheel :D"

Basically very spontaneous and chaotic in the adventures lol

Ty!! (and remember to drink water) ;3

TADC cast x chaotic!kid!reader ! (Platonic)

Guys I'm literally so tired I just got done baking a ton of stuff, like I'm talking 12ish hours of non stop cooking and baking I'm going insane im trying so hard not to fall asleep rn because I kinda. Feel bad for not really answering requests today

Anywahs

Hope you enjoy anon!

Written on mobile

CAINE:

Well well how the turn tables (writing caines portion last for once)

Very similar to kinger and ragatha in that he supports everything you do; in fact he encourages your behavior as long as no one is getting hurt. Very loudly (and sometimes obnoxiously) cheers for you

While kinger can only cheer and clap, I think Caine sets off sparkles and fireworks... probably has a whole group of bubbles cheering you on too , assuming there can be multiple bubbles at any given time (I personally think there can be, and they all share a hivemind of sorts)

So what was the occasion that prompted that?

A wonky cartwheel, of which you excited called "a sideways front flip"

(Fun fact from the admin, I called my first cartwheel that bc I didnt know it was called a cartwheel yet)

POMNI:

Anxious parental figure and hyper child, a dynamic that's hit or miss at least for me. Really it depends on how its executed

That said I think she struggles to keep up with you

Constantly scrambling around you make sure you dont fall into any danger. Literally and figuratively...

Her attempts to get you to sit down for more than five minutes fail

Your ass is failing the marshmallow test/j

RAGATHA:

No thoughts only that one clip from adventure time where BMO pretends to be a wheathervane before trying to nose dive off the roof, all while calling for finns attention. Thats you and ragatha, basically (in essence, not exact scenario though)... maybe zooble too, but we'll get there when we get there (I am currently having a brain blast)

Says things like "what am I gonna do with you" everyday, always lightheartedly of course and usually accompanied by a tired chuckle

Generally very supportive of you though, just so long as you're not hurting yourself! Sure, this is the digital world and injuries dont really stick, but still! The pain is still there

JAX:

I mentioned the marshmallow test in pomnis part and I feel like jax would do something similar with you. Except the test is rigged and the candy (which he uses in place of the marshmallow( is actually for him and not for you. So if you actually earn the extra candy you dont even get it

That said I do think jax would feel bad when you get upset about the joke

Anyways

I think he finds it funny, as long as you're not tugging on his overalls and screaming at him for something, or interfering with his plans

Hes not a neglectful rolemodel/familial figure, he just has a short fuse with the above I think, regardless of who it is, kid or not

That said he fully embraces your spontaneous nature

KINGER:

Peepaw and his grandchild, that's it that's literally the dynamic

"Kinger is only 48-"

Hush♡

"Oh that's so lovely, (reader)" when you run up to him with your hands full of god knows what

Eagerly claps and cheers when you show him a new trick you learned

Bonus if you try to recreate or one up his embellished stories in order to make him proud of you (hes always proud of you)

ZOOBLE:

As mentioned in ragathas part, the wheathervane BMO thing is basically in essence you guys' dynamic. Except where I think ragatha would be quicker to pay attention to you, zooble may be a little slower. Not because they dont care about whatever you're trying to display to them, but because I think a lot of the times they kind of mentally check out (me too honestly)

Tries to scold you if you do something too dangerous or out of line, may come across as way angrier or upset than they actually are though thanks to their voice being kinda

You know

Zooble gives off "cool older sibling who doesnt care about nothing" energy

GANGLE:

Meekly tries to get you to calm down for a few minutes, especially if theres an IHA going on because she doesnt want you to run off and potentially get hurt. Tries to keep you occupied with arts and crafts. Watches in horror as you impulsively eat the glue

Tends to wrap one of her ribbon hands around yours so she knows you're not running off.. this is more so when theres an IHA going on

As per usual not many ideas for gangle <\3

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #digital circus x reader #caine x reader #pomni x reader #ragatha x reader #jax x reader #kinger x reader #zooble x reader #gangle x reader

[ughgoaway]

Potential conflicts for the I love you blurb/fic

1. Annie gets injured at school. Proper injured and has to be taken to hospital. Matty loses it completely, snapping at everything and everyone, including reader. He snaps at her and reader starts to cry (she feels like absolute shit and Matty is clearly not helping) and goes to hide in the bathroom. Once Matty is told that Annie will be alright, he goes and tries to talk to reader, but she's still shaken and doesn't wanna talk to him. He tries to apologise, and in his apology, he says that he loves her.

2. Reader starts hanging out with an old friend of her, maybe a high-school friend or something like that. Matty gets jealous but doesn't say anything at first. Then Annie tells him how reader brought her friend to class and he thought them about whatever it is that he does (maybe he's a firefighter or something that kids think is cool). Matty, like the little shit that he is, instead of communicating his discomfort, he starts distancing himself from reader. When she, tired and confused by his antics, approaches him to ask for an explanation, things get heated, and they start going at each other. When Matty suggests that she's cheating on him, she says something like: Are you stupid? Why would I cheat on you if I love you?

both of these are very, very good. I love them!!! I wanna give my thoughts on both, but I only have the energy for one rn, so here that is! and when I come back and add more, I'll reblog this lol <3

(no proofreading, just vibes)

okay, I'm gonna alter the first one a lil' and maybe make it sadder... apologies, but I promise it ends nice <3

I can see Annie falling off a swing at school and breaking her arm. matty gets the phone call and drops EVERYTHING.

he gets to school and the nurses office and sees you sat with Annie and she's sniffling and holding her arm, her eyes red from crying.

matty runs in, and as soon as Annie sees him, she days, "Daddy?" and then bursts into tears, matty actually feels his heart splinter into 1000 pieces and comes rushing over and holding her, shushing her and stroking her head as it rests against his chest.

"What happened?" he says it kind of angrily, but you brush it off just assuming he's stressed.

"Oh, don't worry too much," you can see matty is annoyed at your words, but you still shake it off and contuine. "Annie was just swinging a little too high and fell off the swing. the nurse says her arm might be broken, so you need to take a little trip to a&e. you'll be okay though, won't you Annie?" As you ask you stretch your arm to stroke her head, but matty jerks her away from you, and you shoot your head up to look at him questioningly.

mattys jaw ticks before he sighs and starts angrily whispering, and if Annie wasn't there, you're sure he'd be shouting. "she'll be okay? where were you? aren't you meant to be watching her? " he hissed.

you're a little taken aback and say, "Well, I was on the playground, but I can't be everywhere all at once, you know that"

matty immediately jumps down your throat and says, "It's your job to keep her safe, and look what's happened? just- go away. I'm taking her to a&e now." he sighs angrily and scoffs at the tears brewing in your eyes and walks off.

as soon as the door clicks shut, you start sobbing, sitting down on the chair with your head in your hands. I'm talking like full snot bubbles aggressive crying.

hurting Annie is your worst fucking nightmare, and you felt guilty enough before matty came in here acting like a dick. you try to be mad at him but you can't help but just blame yourself.

it was your fault she fell. it was your fault she's hurt. you're to blame.

cut to hours later, Annie has a new cast and a lollypop in her mouth and quite honestly couldn't be happier. she got to choose the colour (stereotypical pink but she loves it) and all the staff signed it. she got a sticker and her favourite flavour of Lolly, as well as lots of fuss from everyone, so she's pretty chuffed.

she's looking forward to going to school tomorrow and getting everyone to sign her cast and ask lots of questions, "Did it hurt really bad???"No, but that's because my daddy says I'm really brave, so it would probably hurt you"

(she was crying for a good 45 mins from the pain, but he lets her live in delusion)

and once Annie is asleep in bed and matty is sat on the sofa left with only his own thoughts, he realises he was a fucking dick.

he says, "fuck" out loud and hangs his head down, he wants nothing more than to call you but he knows he should wait until he sees you in person. you haven't moved in yet, but you've been together a while so he could just go over to your place and beg for an apology but he can't bring himself to do it.

him and annie show up early to school. He leaves Annie in the library, showing all the librarians her cast and recounting her story. he sneaks off to your room to apologise.

he walks in, you look up and roll your eyes before going back to your work. overnight, you had gone from guilty to pissed off.

matty knew how much you love Annie, and yet he still treated you like you had personally thrown her off the swing.

"Look, I deserve that, I know. I was a dick yesterday, and I'm so sorry. " matty sighs as he walks over and leans on your desk beside you on your chair. you spin around with your arms cross and nod for him to contuine.

"Please forgive me, baby. I'm so sorry. seeing Annie hurt just broke my heart, and"

"And it didn't break mine? God matty you're such a fucking dick. you know I love her."

he waited for you to scream and shout more, just take it out on him, but you stay silent and stare.

matty was stressing out at your silence, so he did what he did best when stressed. He rambled.

"Please, you have to accept my apology. I've been killing myself the whole night. the way I spoke to you was just- awful. inexcusable. I know you love her, I love her too. and I love you so much. but the whole situation got on top of me and-" matty stopped when he felt your hand on his arm, and he finally had the guts to look you in your eyes and he once again saw them brimming with tears.

before he could stutter another apology, you stand up and hug him. Whilst he's confused, he just wraps his arms around you and hugs you.

he feels you mumble against him but can't quite make it out, "what was that, sweetheart?"

you pull back and give him a teary but happy smile and say, "I forgive you. and I love you too"

it's only then that matty realises what he said, and the look on his face has you giggling immediately. you bring your hands up and rest them on his cheeks.

"Love you," you say, making his eyes look at yours.

you see them soften before he says, "Love you too."

more blurbs from this au here :)

#also ross tears up when matty tells him annie broke her arm #“ITS SAD OKAY. SHES HURT.” #the boys all sign it and add some 75 stickers #this is as angsty as i get lol #i am fragile okay #teacher au! #anon!

[bluebellhairpin]

i need to talk about this rn i'm sorry but i've been having baby fever and been thinking so much about erwin as a dad 😞🩷 (cw pregnancy)

firstly, he suspects you're pregnancy before you do. he's so observant and knows you so well, so when you start to look tired, or have cravings/aversions to certain foods you didn't before, he takes note. what seals it for him is when he notices your pet (let's say a dog) clinging to you. of course they like you, but now it seems they don't want you out of their sight, might even growl whenever he tries to touch you in their presence. and of course, he notices if you haven't yet had your period (he doesn't even need an app he just remembers your usual time of month) but of course he is considerate that you may want to surprise him, and he is gracious enough to be surprised and over the moon with you when you tell him because of course the confirmation is better than the suspicion. he does admit to knowing already later on, but how can you be mad that he pays attention so well??

and when you get rounder, you learn quickly the baby has a preference for his voice. if the baby is hiding from you in the belly or keeps kicking when you want to rest, they only listen to his voice, he'll say something like "Be kind to your mother," and the child will literally stop and you're just like " •_•"

also he will absolutely hire someone to help with cleaning and cooking while you recover postpartum, make sure you don't have to lift a finger for anything besides the baby and your own wellness. even after the first couple weeks and the person he hired is gone, he'll still do most of the cleaning and cooking while you recover because he understands that while you focus on cariny for the baby, he has to focus on caring for you. he will also want to be involved with learning about how to best care for the baby as much as possible (he becomes a master at burping 😌)

and the first time you guys drop the child off at daycare, he's pretty straightfaced and serious to anyone looking at him, gives a quick hug and a kiss to his little one but mainly focuses on making sure everything is accounted for in their bag and lunchkit. the staff might think he's too cold and aloof to be so unemotional about his child's first day at daycare, but what they don't know is that the second he gets in the car and out of the kiddo's sight he puts his hand over his face and starts weeping softly, holding your hand so tightly with the other because his baby is getting so big so fast and he's proud but also sad after hearing them cry as soon as you both walked out.

he just becomes the most wonderful father and husband and loves his family with everything he has ☺️🩷

ik I told u like two days ago I was letting this cook and I'd answers that night but OOF i forgot. however i've enjoyed being reminded each time I went into my ask box! I read though it each time! loved it so much! anyway i'm gonna pop som thoughts below so this doesn't get too long for the poor people who don't wanna be Erwin's baby mama's lol <3

cw pregnancy for below

I very much headcanon Erwin as an observant man, so I 100% agree with the notion that he notices you're pregnant before you do. the food tastes changing, the sickness (the dog! (in my little world there's a dog! (his name is Atticus))) - the notes it all away but the little shit says nothing. he might partially be being considerate and letting you tell him, but i also think he isn't above waiting how long it take you to figure it out after he does. it's like a little bet he has with himself lol

AND THE BABY LIKING HIS VOICE ofc my child would only listen to Erwin smh. that's kinda so funny to me though, I love that idea. maybe Erwin spoke quietly for a while and the baby was real still, you kind of panicked a little, but as soon as Erwin went "oh my god, What?!" the babe went wild as if to say "oh, daddy is here! yay! he didn't leave us alone!" bc yk. the baby is a little shit too just like it's dad.

He also totally doesn't like the idea of you lifting a finger. he says your body is busy making a whole human being, don't you dare make him dinner too, making it himself is the least he can do. I also firmly believe afterwards he's a very hands on dad. yeah perhaps he'll keep some hired help around for the days where e's not there, but when he is there? you're surprised he isn't run off his feet. the man has so much energy for being so chill and stoic. he'd be out here being dad, mum, housekeeper, cook, taxi AND CEO, and still cuddle up to you at the end of the day and wanna attempt to ENTHUSIASTICALY put ANOTHER baby in you.

thEN the picture of him breaking after dropping your kid off for their first day! my heart! he is such a softie. big fucking teddy bear. full of marshmallows and clouds. he can look cold and aloof all he likes but we know the truth. we've seen him cry while watching both The Good Dinosaur and Bluey. he can't hide from us.

#cw pregnancy #thank u for giving me your baby fever. i don't need it or want it. but it's alrought when it's with erwin. #nemo answers #bnuyy <3 #erwin smith x reader

[unorcadox]

UNORCADOX

howdy, i'm mabel! it's the 3 year anniversary of unorcadox today, so i've prepared a decent bit of surprises. (and yes that means i started this blog in 2020, which is terrifying to think about.) i'll go into those new things under the cut, but first... check out the carrd linked in the header text of this post :3c

sooo soo so so so where on earth do i begin. uhh honestly let me just break down the new stuff first since i can talk about that more easily.

THE NEW LOOK! ok so like truth be told, i've been a faceless blog on purpose up until now. it wasn't until this summer where i actually liked how i looked or had any solid sense of my own aesthetic or what i wanted to look like. it also made it easier to protect against dysphoria and transphobes in the same breath, as no one could ever comment on any aspect of my appearance, or even the mere suggestion i even had one to begin with! but that all changes now, i'm going to actually have a presence on this blog, as it is MY blog and tbh i'm tired of being so faceless on here. that's why i've been doing more asks and non-edit posts recently, and those will increase in frequency. check out the carrd for more info, my sona's ref, and art credits for assets on here <3

mondays -> MUSIC MONDAYS! so it might come as a shock i'm actually a musician in addition to making stuff on here! i've promoted my music a couple of times by now, but nothing all that substantial. sooo, considering that, i'm going to be replacing monday oc posts with a music post! just a link to a song on my bandcamp and a little description about it. i don't really care if these perform particularly well, but i want to give people a chance to actually hear it without having to deep dive through my entire internet history to get it. i also will be releasing more soon-- whether via compilations of older work or new stuff altogether :3

MORE IN THE FUTURE! i have a couple other ideas up my sleeve, we'll see how they pan out but i wanna keep trying new possibilities on here. i think at this point i've proven my consistency, and it's about time i let myself have a little fun and explore my options. these will be announced individually but probably added here over time as this is the new pinned post lol.

----- ----- -----

ok so anyways, i do wanna have the mandatory sappy segment because of course i do. i want to say a couple of things but i'll split them into bullet points again bc yeah i do that.

this year has been really good for me and the blog, in most ways it's been the straight up best year of my life uncontested. not everything has gone perfectly, i had other plans that fell through, but hey that's just how life goes huh. at one point, i was easily projected to hit 20k by the end of the year, and now i'll be happy if i hit 17k lol. tumblr has not been that kind to my blog's growth this year and it's making me consider other options in the future, but everything's so scary rn i don't wanna commit to anything.

as for the blog itself, i've kinda been in a weird spot with it for a while. i've been scraping by on here intermittently for the entire year on and off, and i might have some ways to help keep me on top of the ball during the next year, but i also do wonder how long i can really keep doing this, and how long people will still like weirdcore and my work in particular. i've been considering branching out in terms of my presentation, or format, or style, but i feel incredibly weird about doing so.

in my personal life, this is the year i finally started transitioning and seeking treatment for my most pressing issues. i've finally started dating the love of my life, my best friend of 10 years, and despite some interpersonal turmoil all around me, i think i'm finally finding safe ground and knowing what i wanna do next. i don't really talk about it on here because i'm very private about it, but i've been kinda slowly becoming like a Real Adult Person this year. i didn't really have much of a chance to prior and i still am struggling a lot, but hey i know what i want now!

it's really silly to say but this blog still means a lot to me! it's seen me through the craziest times in my entire life, it's brought me so much perspective and knowledge and opportunities i wouldn't've had otherwise. i wake up every day and go on here and never stop feeling starstruck that people chose to follow me. i know tumblr success means nothing but to me it's the only community i've ever actually belonged to, so thank you all.

ok so like i really just don't have much else to say anymore, so i think i'll end it there! thank you all again, i can't wait for year 4 as it's going to definitely be a crazy one lol. let's hope it's a good one too!

#not edits

[piplupod]

the brain better figure out a way to fix this shit real quick or idk what is going to happen honestly. i feel very sick

#counseling appt tomorrow (well today now lol.) and it is very hard for me to not ask to be put in psych ward #i would be free from spiders there. they would feed me meals. i would be given sleep meds #i would still be able to kill myself or hurt myself bc they're so shitty abt safeguarding things there but I'd at least have ppl around #i feel really sick and really awful #i just cannot stop having my heart pounding from anxiety and its been all day and I'm so tired #i dont want to do this anymore #i feel like im going to die from all this honestly even if i dont kill myself fjfkdl like this has to be taking a toll on the body #idk ! i would honestly go to psych ward tomorrow if i could but unfortunately my mother is an issue lmao #i hate that the ward feels like the safest place rn i hate that i dont have a safe home i hate this house I want out of here #im trapped and stuck and even if i filled out all the applications for everything possible tonight i would still be stuck here for weeks #at least weeks lmao its more likely months to even potentially like... 2+ years #and theres no way out !!!!! i dont know what to do. im very scared #sorry im just. really reaching the end of my rope and ik I've said that a lot lately but this isnt even pmdd rn #this is just me rn fjfldl no fucked up hormones at play #im very afraid and i feel very sick and i cannot sleep and i just feel like i want to go home and when i question myself on that- #-i think of the psych ward as the place i want to go and thats rly bad fjfldl thats rly rly bad that that is what my brain wants #okay I'll stop now sorry #i hope everyone else is doing okay fjfkdl i am glad ppl exist and live their lives and have ppl around them #it makes me very happy that other ppl are real and alive and are doing okay #idk . im tired. i hope i can sleep soon and i hope my heart stops acting up. i hope the holter monitor on thurs can get me help for this #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #suicide tw

[sammyboyimagines]

Heeeeeeey~ its me again, but now I have a request for you :3

Can you please make headcanons of Billy Hargrove married with the reader?~ maybe some sfw and some nsfw?~ pretty pleaaaaaase? *puppy eyes*

//hi of course of course!! I'm so sorry this took so long I've had very confusing week and I love this request. Also thank you again for the kind words a few days ago! I'd love to write more for you anytime if you want to request, absolutely no pressure though! <3 I'm listening to my romantic playlist so this should be fun, also it's 1 am sorry for any errors, I think there are many lol

warnings: established relationship, oral, unprotected sex, fluff, smut, MINORS GO AWAY ON THE SECOND HALF OF IT, rough sex, idk what else

alright, first I'm gonna start off with the SFW stuff!

now, obviously the minute you are alone on your honeymoon, he is all over you. Kissing all over your face and neck, cuddling you for hours, etc.

Billy enjoys letting everyone know you're his, your name might as well be "my wife" because he introduces you as his wife to everyone that will listen.

I like to think that Billy settling down might make his father make an effort, I think that seeing him be so loving with you makes his father want to be a better father.

Adding onto that, I think it would also bring his sister closer to him, as she definitely hangs out with you a lot whenever she's not with her friends.

Billy is a very touchy husband, holding your hand as he speeds down the freeway, holding your thigh during dinners with your parents, and pulling you close to him any chance he gets.

He gave you a fancy ring when he proposed to let everyone know you were taken.

Billy doesn't know much about love and committed relationships, but you take everything day by day, and it makes him much more comfortable with the idea of building a life together with you.

I think he would stay awake some nights just thinking about the fact that it really happened. You're his wife.

It took him forever to really let it sink in, but he was excited nonetheless.

I think deep down, Billy was worried that he would never fall in love with someone and really tie the knot. Commitment used to scare him until he found you, someone who didn't care about superficial things like money, looks, etc.

Billy definitely saved up for the proposal in advance. It took him a while to propose because he wanted the scene to be perfect, with nobody interrupting.

The wedding was fairly small, the less the better in his opinion. Just a few family members from each side.

Billy would never come out and say it, but he loves spending holidays and domestic things with you. Exchanging gifts even though you were the best gift he ever could have received.

Though you'd disagree, Billy was constantly worried about being a good husband.

Coming from a broken home, he was terrified that his marriage would end up in shambles like his parents.

It took many sleepless nights and comforting talks for Billy to realize that some things last forever. He wanted it to last forever. (I'm listening to Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls rn sorry if it gets sad)

One thing he had to come to terms with was SHARING. Sharing everything, clothing, feelings, etc. He never learned to give and get back, and he adored every single one of these life lessons from his darling wife.

That reminds me, he stops calling you pet names in public and just starts calling you his beautiful wife. For example, shopping, he'll get your attention with a quick, "Come here, my beautiful wife."

He learns to love the little things. Your tired face in the mornings when he wakes you up from a dead sleep, the way you stare at the ring on your finger for at least 10 minutes every day, the way you looked when saying your vows. He wanted to keep these memories forever.

In conclusion, married life frightened Billy, but with his beautiful wife by his side, he felt better every passing day.

Ugh so sweet and fluffy, time for some NSFW headcanons! NO MINORS BEYOND THIS POINT OR I'M GONNA TELL UR MOM, SHE'S IN BED WITH ME RN

Minors I really mean it, istg she's right here

She's literally right here.

If you don't have a mom, I will tell your dad, I have him on the phone rn

Go away minors, last warning.

Okay onto the content, Billy absolutely revels in the fact that you are his, his baby, his wife, his little slut. He fucking loves it.

Your honeymoon was WILD. He tried positions all over your vacation spot. Against the wall or bending you over was his favorite though, classic and intimate.

The looks he gives you in public places, he definitely undresses you with his eyes whenever he gets the chance.

The ring always gets him hard, knowing that he's yours and you are his for forever makes him long to show you just how much love he has for you. He has A LOT apparently.

Billy loves to hold hands when he's fucking you. Feeling the ring as a loving reminder while he roughly drills into you until you're a moaning mess underneath him.

Billy was very soft on his wedding day. The way he swayed and spun you around as you two danced made your heart flutter. But the honeymoon? He was a beast. You'd get home from a nice dinner and within 2 minutes, he'd have ripped your dress and bent you over whatever surface was closest.

Except for your first night as husband and wife. It was the first time he was gentle. He made love to you, and took his time to make sure he watched his wife's face contort in pleasure as he ate you out or fucked you gently.

That first night, it was the first time he came before you. He was so worked up he had lost control from just teasing you, so when he finally slid inside you, it only took him about a minute to let go. He was extremely upset until you convinced him that he could try again next round.

Adding to that, now that you're married, Billy feels like he has all the time in the world to shower you with love. On weekends, you're never out of bed without your legs shaking and a fucked out smile adorning your face. Billy thought it was the best way to wake up, and how could you refuse morning sex?

Billy hadn't considered children yet in all honesty, but he was opening up about the fact that marriages could work without constant arguing and compensating. He was in the moment.

That being said, he fucked you raw practically every time. You were on birth control (or not, whatever you wanna do), and he couldn't resist the feeling of your soft warm walls on his dick, it was like heaven.

After several rounds, Billy loves to either draw you a nice hot bath to make up for his roughness or cuddle up to you.

Billy was accidentally the little spoon for one night and now he likes to be the little spoon every now and then.

Being, his wife, you got used to his hands on you all the time. You couldn't pass by him without a loud slap on the ass or a kiss on the head.

He loves to kiss your collarbone and your neck, to leave marks, and hickeys all over. The first time you talked to Robin and Steve after the honeymoon, they were disgusted by the blatantly obvious hickeys covering your neck, collarbone, chest, and under your clothes.

High sex drive, he loves quickies, blow jobs, and fingering you under the table. He loved fucking your throat, watching you struggle to take him as you gag on his cock.

Hair-pulling kink. He pulls your hair while fucking you from behind, pulling your body back to whisper, "my good little slut, taking me so well" into your ear. He loves when you pull his hair too, the first time you did it he audibly moaned. It shocked the both of you.

Never lets you get off alone. He was visibly upset when he found out that you still masturbated when you two were married. He felt that there was no reason to do that when he was always there to help you out. He was offended.

Billy explored many kinks with you as the marriage went forward. He has a daddy kink for sure. This was discovered when you mumbled in during sex and he lost control in like 30 seconds.

Billy likes to think that he's the man of the house, you're his. That's what he tells other people. However, he is absolutely whipped for you. Whatever you need, whatever you want to do, he's right there doing it for you. Whether its eating your out or making dinner.

He can hardly stand in the kitchen cooking with you, he'll get carried away and before you know it, the food is burnt and you've been making out on the couch for an hour.

Car sex is a must, before hanging out with friends, before dinner, before anything, you aren't leaving until he's had his way with you.

//okay i think i'm done, i really hope you liked it!! <3

#billy hargove imagine #billy hargove x reader #billy x reader #billy hargove smut #billy hargrove #stranger things netflix #stranger things #robin buckley #steve harrington #billy headcanons

[gunmetal-ring]

anon again. i'm sorry that i keep coming to you with this depressing messages but you seem like one of the few sane ppl in this fandom and i appreciate your honesty.

truth is im feeling really disillusioned with hellcheer lately. we don't have a lot of "canon" content so after a while, it gets tiring going thru the same 2 scenes over and over again (especially when one of them involves chrissy's death). ive been relying on fandom but it seems like it's slowed down. fics arent updated as frequently, not a lot of new artwork.

heck, even joe and grace have moved on. joe's career is taking off. grace is leaving acting. it just feels like everything that happened last summer has come to an end :(

Aw anon thats okay. Ty for thinking of my feelings though 💓 (and also im flattered that you think im sane lmao)

Unfortunately its the way things go, especially with small ships, especially especially in a fandom as hostile as this one is. People come together and build community and share their love for characters and then g(r)o(w) their separate ways again.

But not everybody does! You and me, for example. And ive got plenty of hellcheer mutuals that seem perfectly content to draw, write, and rb their little hearts out.

I for one am absolutely astounded that theres even a fandom for hellcheer, let alone one with such talent and breadth and depth of love! Our characters had 2 scenes. Our girl was killed just as it all began. Our boy died with her name on his lips. In all likelihood we will never see them together on our screens again.

But somehow. Those ~10 minutes managed to foster an entire community of people and keep us engaged and in love w the characters for almost a year at this point! With no dangling promises or false hope or anything! Like we all know the score and we still go hard for hellcheer. Incredible.

Idk maybe it's just bc ive only had brainworms like this for 2 other ships and 1 of them is even smaller and the other one is a clusterfuck of unimaginable proportions, so im a little biased in terms of community/fandom, but im just like... idk. I think its really incredible thats all. And a testament to the very real power and truth of hellcheer 🥰

All i can say anon is that the best way to keep a fandom/ship going is engagement. Likes on tumblr and kudos on ao3 are great. But whats even better and more motivating (and i say this as a fic writer/meme shitposter so im speaking the total truth lol) is reblogs and comments. Tell people how much you love their work and how much it means to you, it goes a very long way. And on the flip side of that - stay out of the infighting. All it does is sap your mental energy and the fandom infighting bullshit is a major contributor to why people leave. The negativity and bitterness warp your perspective and make it really hard to remember what we're here for - it's not anti-st*ddie or anti-qu*nn stans or anti-anti-hellcheer or what the fuck ever. We're here for hellcheer!

Sorry my $0.02 is now $2.00 bc i ramble lol its a fatal flaw of mine. Anyway im sorry if this is annoyingly positive or dismissive but im in a strangely upbeat mood rn so there you have it

#im not getting into the whole joe/grace career stuff bc ive talked abt it a million times and i dont want to invite more bad faith anons #op #hellcheer #ask #anon

[skyward-floored]

Hey peg, got a non tri force heroes related ask (woah!, shocking!, unprecedented!) whats your opinion on my favorite lil guys; ravio, yuga, and hilda. since ALBW is also my second favorite zelda game. which weirdly enough is also the ONLY other zelda game I've played (to competition) weird how that works ya know? also, hows the youse? I'm pretty good rn, on my mid winter break so I'm feelin nice and practically useless.

Oooooogggghhhh albw makes me feel so many things it's one of my favorite zelda games even though I rarely talk about it (I also haven't played it in a hot minute so if I get details wrong here that's why and I'm not proofreading so hehe this might be a disaster)

(also spoiler warning if anyone hasn't played albw)

I LOVE Ravio. So much. He's goofy and silly and a has a little pet bird and has a rabbit hood and dances when he makes money but also he's more or less a refugee trying to save his doomed home in the only way he can think of. He's a buisness man and his prices are ridiculous but he has concern for Link as well, and is actually his counterpart and their dynamic and everything makes me crazy. Also he's a coward and I relate to that so much. I feel like a coward so often, and I know a lot of people feel inspired by Link's brand of courage but honestly Ravio's is just as important to me if not more. Cause yeah he's a coward. But he has enough courage to leave his home (go to another WORLD) to find somebody who isn't cowardly and who can help fix things and stop Hilda from making a huge mistake. And it pays off. Ravio is a hero in my eyes and I love him.

Yuga I don't have a huge opinion about, but he's an interesting villain. I do like how he merged himself with Ganon, that was a gutsy move I did NOT expect the first time. Plus his whole thing about being obsessed with beauty and paintings and things, it's creepy and stuff, but makes him stick out more in my mind then some other villains. Other then that I don't have a lot to say about him lol, but his whole thing with manipulating Hilda and stuff was interesting too. I'd love to see more of his and Ravio and Hilda's background/story. also his weapon is neat.

Hilda is great <3 Her turning out to be the bad guy was REALLY unexpected (like I maybe suspected her a bit but I was so busy with her encouragment and saving the world and everything I wrote it off), and her motivations were SO interesting. She's making horrible manipulative decisions, but she's trying to save her people, her home. It's the only option that's really left to her and she's desperate to do something to help them, but Ravio helps her see that destroying another world isn't the way. And like, she just seems so scared to me. She's trying to pull together a kingdom that's literally falling apart, Yuga is whispering poison in her ear, but she's so determined to save her people, at any cost. She's an awesome character, and her face at the ending after Link and Zelda restore Lorule's triforce just about makes me cry. That's the face of somebody who lost her hope and thought she deserved nothing, and got everything. She can't believe it. I love albw.

...Also you asked how I'm doing, the answer is not bad! Swimming in too many AUs at the moment, but it happens. Trying to get reasonable amounts of sleep and failing recently lol. I've just been really tired and it's very annoying. But aside from that, pretty good.

#holy crap this got long sorry aboutt hat #apparently i had a lot to say #answers from the floor #lovely guy made of bees #a link between worlds #ravio #princess hilda #yuga #legend of zelda #also I don't like what the fandom has generally done to Ravio but that's a rant for another day

[crow-the-unknown]

ok i think there's something very interesting about talking the five best forwards in this league... and this is in no way me actually ranking them 1-5, i'm just pointing out something curious about their play so here i go

starting with mcdavid: connor plays a fast, smooth game. mostly offensive. he doesn't need to barrel through guys, he just cuts through them like a hot knife through butter and it's highly effective. he also doesn't need to play a gritty, defensive game. all his power can and does go into being the best offensive player out there and it's because of his speed

now we pan over to matthews: similar to mcdavid, auston seems to play more quickly offensively like connor does. he isn't nearly as fast, but he's very effective anyway. he plays slightly grittier, but still plays more of a connor-eque game than the people i'm going to mention next.

draisaitl: leon is a pretty good mix of fast versus strong offense. he leans more to the fast side, but when it's needed he'll barrel through you with pretty much no problem. he isn't afraid to get into a bit of a scrum, but it's rare that we really see him bother with fighting especially since he often doesn't need to. he plays everywhere more evenly than i think connor does. so the main difference would be that leon plays a bit better defensively than connor needs to.

mackinnon: nate is the best mix of speed and strength paired with a rounded game. this doesn't mean he's better than connor, but for me it places him pretty firmly in that second spot even though leon's still very close. i just think nate plays the well-rounded approach better than leon. he has that fire in him, and he will more willingly start or finish a fight than some people give him credit for. nate can also just as easily pick your pocket and cut through you as he can use brute force to split the defenders and score. he works pretty well in the defensive zone, too, which makes him a perfect blend. i know i'm more biased since the avs are my first team, but i do find myself blown away at everything he does. sorry for the essay lol

and finally, our beloved rat king, tkachuk: matthew is frankly wild to me because it doesn't make sense how he can be so gritty and get under guys skin while being such a star player. but that seems to just be the tkachuk thing. he'll chirp you into the sun or take a penalty or even get ejected and then he makes up for it by leaving you in the dust and scoring something beautiful. it's pretty impressive, and it's very rare to see in the league anymore. he never seems to tire and he's one of those players you need on a team. matthew actually uses his dirty style of game and pays it forward into his sheer talent. i'm super glad more people are starting to recognize his brilliance this year, cos it's been super fun to watch honestly.

basically. it's just cool too analyze the similarities and differences between the (mostly agreed on) top five forwards rn. personally my list goes; connor, nate, leon, matthew, and then auston :3

#colorado avalanche #edmonton oilers #toronto maple leafs #florida panthers #nathan mackinnon #connor mcdavid #leon draisaitl #auston matthews #matthew tkachuk