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deep-hearts-core · 2 years

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reviewing the 2022 eurovision songs

going purely off my first impressions of the videos on youtube.

Ukraine: Stefania by Kalush took me a minute to get into this. i like it once it settles in. equal parts monatik and go_a in a way that is really satisfying to my own personal tastes. i don't think this is a contender, though. will probably qualify but no matter what the obnoxious fans say on twitter i do not believe for a second that this will win because of the war. if it were a peace ballad then maybe.

Austria: Halo by Lumix it's fine, i guess? has the feel of some of the kpop girl group songs that i've liked recently. but i have a feeling this won't translate well to stage.

Netherlands: De Diepte by s10 it's pretty! at first i was like "eh, too folksy for my taste" but then the chorus hit and now i'm into it. i really hope this gets staged well, would love to see it place left side.

Albania: Sekret by Ronela Hajati not for me. i don't like this style of music.

UK: Spaceman by Sam Ryder He has a funny vibrato that I don't like much. it's really like every other uk song recently. bottom five for sure. chorus isn't good enough.

Sweden: Hold Me Closer by Cornelia Jakobs i??? don't like it??? and honestly i don't think it's going to hold up well against the other songs. it's better once the beat kicks in in the second verse but still not nearly what i expect from sweden. also the staging with the green light is really weird.

France: Fulenn by Alvan and Ahez a refreshing french take on a genre that i usually associate with the caucasus countries. big kudos to them for singing in breton. i don't like the drop, but the vocals are really well blended and haunting, especially at the beginning. i hope this does well.

Serbia: In Corpore Sano by Konstrakta not exactly sure what's going on here. it's about... not having health insurance? or something? either way it's too artsy and weird for me to like it.

Armenia: Snap by Rosa Linn not a genre we usually see from Armenia. i'm a little underwhelmed by it. but i don't hate it.

Spain: Slo-mo by Chanel extremely spanish, generically latin american, not sure how this is gonna do, not sure how i feel about it, lol.

Italy: Brividi by Mahmood and Blanco a lot of autotune going on here. doesn't have what excited me about soldi and i've heard through the grapevine that there's some transphobia circulating from one of the artists. overall i'm bored and i think this might place pretty low. a big upset for italy.

Romania: Llamame by WRS peak camp Eurovision masculinity. someday i'll make a post about this. nah but i don't like it. the staging from the nf is good but it's just not my style of song.

Belgium: Miss You by Jeremie Makiese I have faith in the live vocals of this song but there's not enough going for it in the instrumental. Belgium has definitely had worse entries and this might qualify if the staging is good.

Cyprus: Ela by Andromache Cyprus sticking to their guns. This is typical of the Greek and Cypriot entries for the past, like, decade I think? From Aphrodisiac and La La Love to Replay this is something I've heard a lot before. For this reason I'm not so into it. There are other songs that have done this concept better.

Greece: Die Together by Amanda Georgiadi Tenfjord Uncertain how they'll execute those close harmonies in the beginning. It's just so... empty for a while? Also, what the fuck are these lyrics lol is she advertising double suicide to save their relationship. I. Decent build to the final chorus I Guess but these lyrics turn me off the song.

Azerbaijan: Fade to Black by Nadir Rustamli Azerbaijan continuing their flop era, I think. This bored me to tears from the very start.

Lithuania: Sentimentai by Monika Liu loooooving the retro feel of this and Monika's voice suits it pretty well. I think this will do badly but I, personally, like it a lot.

Israel: IM by Michael Ben David at first i was like "im not going to review this song at all because i don't condone israel's participation in the contest". but i feel like it's worth saying how much this song sucks. it's eurovision masculinity again but worse than romania. strong start I Guess but like. the legitimization of Israel via ESC is its whole other paper and the song is just bad.

Portugal: Saudade Saudade by Maro once the harmonies hit, it's really nice! but has a slow start. Maro's voice doesn't stand out enough on its own.

Montenegro: Breathe by Vladana I'm bored and I don't like her voice. No universe in which this qualifies. I feel bad because this is apparently about her mom who died from Covid but I just don't see Montenegro pulling this off.

Australia: Not the Same by Sheldon Riley he's got a very strong voice and this is a song that i really relate to. I don't have a lot of coherent thoughts about it but I like this quite a bit. what's up with his outfit though.

San Marino: Stripper by Achille Lauro better than I usually expect from San Marino, and the first song I've heard so far that really seems to be following Maneskin's lead in terms of genre. i could see this qualifying????

Bulgaria: Intention by Intelligent Music Project oh okay, all the rock songs are in the second half of the playlist. this is fine I guess. i'm not into it, the mv is weird, idk it's just not grabbing my attention and (as weird as it is to say) San Marino did better with the genre.

Poland: River by Ochman i like his voice a lot. transitions are overall really clumsy but this isn't a bad choice for poland. although it definitely isn't the most interesting ballad of the year.

Moldova: Trenuletul by Zdob si Zdub is this song about.... unifying with Romania???? no but this is so fun i like it a lot. fun little folklore stuff, moldova has been leaning into the fun stuff recently and they actually do it pretty well nowadays! definitely one of my favorites so far.

Norway: Give That Wolf a Banana by Subwoolfer a lot of people following after Discoteque this year, huh. That's fine - sometimes the weird is good. This is catchy and Norway being Norway I'm curious to see how they'll stage this. Definitely loses points for the lyrics, I'm sorry, what? Wolves don't eat bananas.

North Macedonia: Circles by Andrea Not their worst, not the worst ballad this year I don't think, good build. Not a fan of how the second verse is just the first verse, but again.

Switzerland: Boys Do Cry by Marius Bear Deeply bored by this, musically, but in terms of the meaning... important. Which helps the song for me. But only a little.

Malta: I Am What I Am by Emma Muscat Catchy. I think I like it? I think my overall opinion of the song is positive and I could see this potentially being staged well.

Ireland: That's Rich by Brooke this is fun! fun and angry! love a good angry song! this is decent production, better than we usually see out of the british isles. ireland is taking this seriously. i hope the staging reflects this too.

Finland: Jezebel by The Rasmus damn most of the rock isn't nearly living up to Maneskin. chorus moves too quickly in the transitions in. instrumental is pretty alright, but i don't like the singer's voice, and the key change into the second chorus is weird, and also the "girl who looks like a boy" lyric is a little. questionable. from my position as a trans person dating a trans woman and who is well aware of predatory stereotypes around transfem people.

Czechia: Lights Off by We Are Domi decent Euroclub song. i like the verses.

Iceland: Medh Haekkandi Sol by Systur i had high hopes for this one, and i'm feeling inexplicably let down. it's TOO quiet, and the harmonies aren't mixed well enough in the nf performance. staging here is good, though. i can't see it qualifying which sucks because i so often like the icelandic entries. also i'm not vibing with the major chord at the end.

Estonia: Hope by Stefan weirdly, i find myself liking this. it's a decent take on euro-country that doesn't feel too tryhard the way the dutch versions often do. hopefully he sounds good live and the staging is good. live, this could go either way, estonia's a little hit or miss in that regard. but i'm hoping it does well.

Germany: Rockstars by Malik Harris god ok i hate his voice. incredibly radio friendly song and i think with a different singer i would feel better about it but as it is it's the same boring shit germany has become known for.

Denmark: The Show by Reddi the beginning feels very 90s ESC. i like it more once the beat kicks in, i could see this qualifying or otherwise doing alright but i'm not liking the vocalist. not my least favorite song from this year, I guess?

Latvia: Eat Your Salad by Citi Zeni killer first line aside, this is a good song musically. no comment on the lyrics. sorry, latvia. no but they're okay rappers, at least from the mv, the background track is good? this is better than i was expecting?

Georgia: Lock Me In by Circus Mircus it's weird, but it's okay. will definitely be memorable but not sure if that'll be for the better or for worse. georgia historically has great staging so there's a future where i can see this qualifying.

Slovenia: Disko by LPS this is a song by teenagers and it feels like a song by teenagers. sorry, slovenia. it's okay, it's cute, it doesn't stand out.

Croatia: Guilty Pleasure by Mia Dimsic it's pretty good, it's cute, it isn't necessarily suited for eurovision but i could see myself listening to this post-contest. really interesting (affectionate) things happening in the instrumental.

overall this is a really weak year, i think. not super vibing with any of these. i'll drop my top 10, though (thanks as always to the gerbear esc sorter, keeping us all alive): Netherlands, Moldova, Ireland, Australia, Estonia, Lithuania, Sweden, Latvia, Croatia, Ukraine.

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