#YOU’RE JOKING

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

More random Nimona headcanons

Bal is one of those people who isn’t allergic to anything except one random medication that no one uses 

Ambrosius calls him a lucky bastard every time it’s brought up because he’s allergic to everything 

His allergy list is at least three pages long and he doesn’t remember a single thing on that list 

Whenever they go out to eat Bal has to remind him “No you can’t eat that it has olives” “Not that either love it’s got lemon” and so on 

Most of his allergic reactions are pretty tame so he’ll eat it anyway

And it gives Bal and Nimona so much fucking anxiety 

One time Bal walked in on Nimona chasing Ambrosius around the kitchen yelling “Spit out the carrots Nemesis you don’t even like them that much!!” 

Whenever he eats alone he refers to it as a game of Russian roulette 

Bal refers to it as the reason he has high blood pressure

Because Bal and Ambrosius grew up in the limelight (for very different reasons) there are a million pictures of them through the years 

And they use those videos to bully the hell out of each other 

Bal can quote the video from the beginning of the movie not because it was an important moment in his childhood 

But because Ambrosius will quote it at the most random times throughout the day

Bal will do something small like kill a bug or chase out an animal that Nimona brought in

And he’ll hear Ambrosius mumble “I’m here to slay monsters and protect our kingdom”

He was a little worried Nimona would react badly to this habit but he started joining in 

One time he killed a spider and Ambrosius asks “Are you slaying monsters moonbeam?” Nimona yells from the other room “I’m so proud of him he’s truly protecting our kingdom” 

There are a million photos of baby Ambrosius on the internet 

And Bal made a PowerPoint presentation ranking their cuteness factor out of 10 (100 was the lowest score he got and it was a picture of him with the ugliest bowl cut you’ve ever seen)

And made Ambrosius sit through it 

That was the most loved and mortified he had felt in a long time

Nimona uses low-quality pictures of them as reaction photos 

There have been times when Nimona asks “Can we eat out tonight” and Bal tells her no and she sends him this 

He’ll text back “Is that my fucking wanted poster?!” 

She asked Ambrosius if there was any ice cream left and he said no he expected her to call him and complain he didn’t expect this 

He calls her yelling “When the fuck did that happen?!” 

And she hangs up immediately to let Bal deal with it

#nimona 2023 #Nimona movie #nimona headcanon #nimona #ballister boldheart #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister x ambrosius #goldenheart #im dedicated to destroying Ambrosius cool guy image #that man is a dork #a feral fucking loser #and I’m in love with him #when they were tricking the director Bal records it all #you can here him rewinding the video #which means he has a video of Nimona disguised as Ambrosius getting stabbed #and you think she wouldn’t use that as a meme? #you’re joking #someone take this movie away from me #they've invaded every part of my life #I cant even listen to music #I was listening to Hozier's new album and thought wow this is like Bal and Ambrosius #I just know Ambrosius was the sick kid growing up #I could write so much angst about that #I might do that next

[runwayblues]

you have got to be kidding me

#this is so so bad for me #his HAIR #you’re joking #you’re joking!!!! #samuel… #sir please #another day another sammy slay #sam kiszka #sam gvf #greta van fleet #gvf #jake kiszka #jake gvf #josh kiszka #josh gvf #danny wagner #danny gvf

[pleasejustletpercyrest]

Constantly thinking about quest deadlines. Like, I understand there needs to be not only the danger of monsters and gods and such, but also the clock ticking for the storyline to be so compelling, but also like DAMN you’re choosing 12 year olds to TRAVEL ACROSS THE COUNTRY and you’re giving them what? A week? 10 days? It varies, but every time WITHOUT FAIL the gods are like “oh yeah btw you know this life threatening journey? Be back on Monday”.

Additionally, they do this to kids, 12-15 year olds who have DISABILITIES!!! Bro can get an extra 30 minutes on a standardized test with an open book policy but GOD FORBID he gets more than seven days to fulfill a heroes quest. You can’t look at me and tell me this is not just another “tee hee fuck you” from the gods, like less than three days into their journey in the Lightning Thief, Percy, Annabeth and Grover were like “hey we have time, let’s go completely off track and go see the Gateway Arch! Let’s not take this margin of free time to try and get ahead, I wanna see some cool shit!” And I support them, I adore them, but really? You’re looking at Mr. Jackoff and his ragtag band of hyperactive, vaguely autistic preteens and you’re like “yeah they’re gonna get there on time”. Be SO FR right now.

#percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #heroes of olympus #memes #annabeth chase #grover underwood #adhd #autism #percy jackson adhd #percy jackson and the lightning thief #the lightning theif #Annabeth is autistic and her special interest is architecture #make it make sense #the gods need to be giving their kid’s accommodations #I think that legally they have to #catch my hands zeus istg you’re gonna get it #A WEEK?!???? #YOU’RE JOKING #kay’s headcanons #kay rants #my thoughts

[sirjacobthomaskiszka]

i’m going to need so much time to process this, JACOB ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME RN??? THE HAIR THE HAT THE FIT THE ASS ON THIS MAN. I AM SO FUCKING UNWELL.

via Ide Mae’s insta story!!!

#jacob thomas kiszka #you’re joking #jake kiszka #greta van fleet #josh kiszka #danny wagner #sam kiszka #ida mae #long gone and heartworn

[yujikuna]

#you’re joking #ur absolutely joking #my boy #cries #totk #tears of the kingdom #i have tears in my eyes as j type that #legend of zelda #totk link #new link tag let me just dioeneowodjdosndkd 🥹 #loz #botw 2 #breath of the wild 2 #botw link #loz totk

[shutupdevvie]

this jumpsuit was a different level honestly. that thing was TAILORED.

#the HIPS #the NECKLINE #you’re joking

[aestheticpearl]

THIS BLOG IS 8 YEARS OLD???

#ITS BEEN 8 YEARS?? #you’re joking #i’ve been writing for that long? #oh my god #i started this blog when i was like #13 #PAUSE #i made this when i was 13?! #now what the hell

[barzyhughes]

QUEEN ELLEN IS ON THE RED CARPET

#jack hughes #nj devils #this is so cute #oh my god #you’re joking #new jersey devils

[1-800-pogosticks]

I haven’t seen anything ab this yet so can I please just point out that Ted has a PHONE ALERT set for 11:11

#what kind of magical sunshine creature ass #you’re joking #the man has a SET REMINDER #WITH SOUND #for his designated bi-daily Wish Time #I would kill for you Theodore Lasso #Ted Lasso #Ted Lasso season 3 #3x2 #Ted Lasso 3x2 #Ted Lasso spoilers #spoilers

[alonsoings]

FERNANDO WHAT

#you’re joking #aston when i catch you. #f1 #fernando alonso #fa14 #imola gp 2024

[gorypizza]

THERE’S A RENFIELD 2023 GAME??

#renfield 2023 #renfield bring your own blood #you’re joking #why has nobody told me

[baura-bear]

I am so unwell oh my gosh Batman begins returns to theaters on September 16 but the closest one to me is an hour away and I have a mandatory dinner with one of my classes that day so I won’t be able to go are you kidding

#screaming crying throwing up #you’re joking #you’re actually joking #this is fine #not newsies

[dorianwolfforest]

Whoever decided we’d need to level up our horse to do the special movements and gaits that you already made people spend extra sc for, just know I am coming for you and my 560 horses will stomp on you with their hooves. How the fuck am I gonna get. How. Bro. What the fuck. I’m going to hippity hop off a cliff.

I’m going to make whoever is responsible train all of them or I’m going to sue for emotional damage

#you’re JOKING #I’m ill. #sso #ssoblr

[rushmanatalie]

there’s no way what if episode five has peggy asking nat to go revisit her childhood trauma hellsite for the sake of steggy

#you’re joking #please say sike #marvels what if #natasha romanoff

[nostalgiabones]

end up here on the dice 5sos I am in your walls 😭

#you’re JOKING #can someone pls confirm if luke was wearing. a tie #me and Crystal need to know #THANKS

[sparrowofthedawn]

UHHHH I WITNESSED BLACK SMOKE RISING ACOUSTIC FROM LIKE 50 FEET AWAY

#you’re JOKING #I LOVE THEM SO BAD ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY #greta van fleet