#all of the options would work very well

[mossycobblestonewrites]

DC X DP PROMPT #25

Amity Park is seen as a tourist trap, like the whole town. No one in Amity is aware of this. All tourists think the townees are just really into the act.

One (or multiple) super families have decided to go on a Classic American Road Trip™. Which means they simply must visit all the tourist traps they see!

While in Amity, on a guided bus tour, there is a ghost attack. While the other passengers are thrilled with the commitment to the bit, the superfamily starts to become suspicious.

#dc x dp #dpxdc #dats it #i have drafts yall #and the college semester just finished >:) #i have some written out versions of my prompts in the works #you can use any family btw #i didnt specify because i couldnt choose lol #all of the options would work very well #if multiple families are going i expect maximum hijinks #like they all planned these roadtrips independently #im personally partial to either the superman fam or martians #for personal reasons #amity park is a tourist trap #to tourists

[hal-o-ween]

Sweet Dreams <3

#my art #pokemon #galarian ponyta #digital art #hiiii everyone hello please look at my darling angel Amalthea. shes my partner pokemon in pokednd <3 #most of our pokemon went missing so Mia (my character) took our remaining pokemon to get their pictures taken in case they go missing #i did in fact draw all three of them. am going to work on doing digital versions of the other two #its all of our partner pokemons :3 ponyta. impidimp. and mankey <3 #the sketches i did for the other two are so fun i cant wait to draw them #impidimp's made my cousins all laugh so hard they almost cried #this session was so fun and we also talked afterwards about pokemon we may want on our teams in the future #and honestly my potential line up for Mia feels so good #her next pokemon she gets is very possibly going to be a bewear. absolutely out of left field choice but it works so beautifully #im also thinking good options for her would be breloom. grumpig. wyrdeer. maybe mimikyu. #grumpig and breloom are honestly the top of the list. they suit her so beautifully #wyrdeer is also really good. mimikyu would be up to roleplay #mimikyu and bewear would both play into her animal handling skill #mimikyu would also end up disguised as a sylveon #probably play that as mimikyu wanting to fit in with Mia's team since she's really nice to it and it wants her to be its trainer #bewear on the other hand would 1. work well aesthetically for her and 2. would be fantastic roleplay material what with it being a giant #aggro bear and mia is just this gentle giant who is so fucking good with pokemon so its like well. #the nice girl wants me to be nice so i wont kill you because i like her. she gives me snacks and pets me and treats me well

[sergle]

so sorry if this is too invasive of a question but did you ever start an antidepressant that didnt affect your ability to nut or did you just discontinue your meds entirely ? asking bc i started a new antidepressant recently and have been afflicted with the same condition but im like so embarrassed to bring it up to my doctor idk if theres even anything they can do or another medication that wont do this 😭

OH Man yeah okay, I haven't been Thoroughly cataloging my medication journey but like... first of all, I Did Not Tell my doctor about the nut curse. I just didn't. so you can definitely get around that if you don't want to bring it up as vehemently as I did. but, after I went off lexy, I started on bupropion. which does not impede my ability to nut. in fact, ever since my dose on it got raised, it's doing the opposite of that.

#I think it's bc SSRIs have the potential for the Nut Curse and most antidepressants are That #but bupropion isn't. it's a (tabs away to google) #NDRI. #so the list of side effects seems to be different #I can't in good conscience Recommend bupropion to you bc I'm not your doctor but it Is a medication that (for me) doesn't Nut Curse. #but yes!! there are in fact medications that don't do that!! #or I am pretty sure that if you are on an antidepressant that's WORKING very well for you- BUT- it's giving you a nut curse #then you can stay on those meds but maybe take some other thang to counteract the undesired side effect. butttt that would require #having a conversation with your doctor about specifically your ability to bust a big one. which... #some ppl are stronger than others. i am weak. i did not wanna have a conversation like that #and also lexapro didn't work for me AT ALL it actually made me worse. so just switching meds was the smarter option #sergle answers

[moe-broey]

I've never been a "born in the wrong generation" type of guy because for So Many reasons I would be dead. Full stop like I would have died during childbirth I would have died of appendicitis age 8 and that's not even factoring in my queerness and neurodivergency and ultimately my mental health (carefully maintained thanks to support/modern advances in medicine and treatment). On Top Of That my hobbies include The Video Game and many such things that are of modern invention (adjacently: including The Device I'm typing this out on right now which has become my main avenue of communication to the outside world)

But I'm just saying that. It WOULD be nice. To exist in a world where fluorescent lighting doesn't exist and everything is possibly 99% less overstimulating all of the time forever.

#and like. a little less capitalist dystopia. i could do with less of that. #but focusing primarily on my own struggle. it's just a bummer sometimes like #i genuinely had fun!!! w my sisters and friends!!! esp at the arcade w ddr that is ALWAYS so fun #but man you can't even take me to your own damn house unless if you're ready to accept vampire rules. #my sister can/does dim the lights if i ask and i don't mind asking it's just fucking crazy to me like #damn uoy guys live like this. bright ass lights ten diff convos at once music in the bg. what if i died on this beanbag #BUT. THAT IS. one thing that is very nice i AM allowed to die on the beanbag!!!!!!! i'm allowed to cozy up and rest #while everyone does their own thing and i can listen in and chime in every now and again. severely underrated tbh #i really only feel a little hopeless when i think about like. public spaces where the only thing i can control is myself #IF i am ever employable again my requirements would be. no florescent lighting. i will die. #which like. kind of limits my prospects. #i do enjoy outdoors/physical work actually though so. i'm just limited bc i have to bind. #i am. so severely. banking on top surgery working out. it won't be a cure-all but by god it WILL open up my options #plus the. constant fatigue. of binding. but not binding is even worse. i need divine intervention (surgery) #SAD. well there are other people in yhe world #but man rhat is like my fave joke to make but i feel so much sadness attached to it. the world will move on without me. #there are a million other people who are far more capable. much 'easier'. ect. #and i know the answer is well there's only one me and there are a handful of people who love me. who keep me and include me #i am very thankful for that. #it's just a bit of a bummer sometimes. i stay silly and have the most fun i can but i am a little sad about it.

[jayswing101]

#hello i just watched this video and started crying when they said the original sculptor's finger prints are preserved in the bronze casting #this is so cool and i love this sculpture so much #im also thinking i need to start looking into archaeology in turtle island and see if there's any Indigenous archaeologists to work with.. #bc ive always wanted to do archaeology but archaeology in turtle island has such a bad past #and is very closely associated with theft and disrespectful practices for Indigenous peoples past and present #so i never really considered doing archaeology here as an option #thought the only way to do archaeology in a way that honoured and respected the people of the past would be to go abroad #but this video and the care that was taken when recreating the pots in bronze makes it clear that no #it is possible to do archaeology in a good way here too #i just have to find other Indigenous people who are the ones leading the research teams #anyway. this is a v cool video and it made me emotional so here. for you all to see as well! #indigenous #indigenous art #sculpture #experimental archaeology #archeology #video

[munamania]

i dont wanna be a dick and act like i have no responsibility in this but after a point dont u think if all you ever say to ur friend is Omg you never make it out why dont you ever come out with us you bail all the time youre such a flake etc. dont u think that person (me) is like. not gonna feel so inclined to. be there

#like. yeah i was bad last semester i get it. and probably i shouldve tried at least once or twice to push thru #but i was so exhausted. and every time they would bring up hanging out it was on my longest days #and when i casually brought this up they were just like Well we have long days too. Okay! #and i love and miss these friends and i know for the most part. or at least think. theyre just teasing #i hate being seen as the flake like any time i do have to be like Oh i cant make that or Shit im sorry i have to bail #i try to offer an alternative???? and they never compromise on that. how is that fair like im not just outright rejecting u all the time #not to mention most of the time last semester it was always gonna be somewhere super easy for them to get home and far from me #im not like constantly holding this against them btw but i feel like they're holding it against me and i dont have any more apologies in me #anyway. that said. if theyre somewhere really expensive and far from me tn and i get out of work early #i. probably will not make it. lol! if theyd be willing to come a little closer to my place to one of the dives or some shit thatd be great #and like im not doing much today until class and work so really like. i WILL try. but i think they could sometimes not go for the most #expensive and inconvenient option as well. and these r all things ill say if it becomes like a problem problem or smth #but rn im not gonna be a dickhead and shit on their plans #but also! ok whatever im not gonna keep going on i just feel shitty im not 100% better from being sick and im just frustrated #about having to fuckign grovel over and over and over. i meant it the first few times now im just like #u could try not to be an asshole to me for five seconds too. like. i am very clearly not someone trying to secretly stop being friends #w yall. things happen #abby talks #and maybe this is an esp sore spot bc like ive certainly had some of you bail on me or be flaky or whatever before. and i didnt throw #a fucking fit to your face about it. probably bc it actually did feel more mean spirited sometimes #OK im sorry im not trying to make my friends sound evil and its mostly just the one and like im working on forgiving her for it cause it #was years ago but also like christ!

[waywardsalt]

Hi! I hope you’re doing good in life.

What do you think of a phantom hourglass remake? Tbh I don’t know how they could remake it without basically remaking it from the ground-up. It would probably play more like windwaker, which I see as a both a good and bad thing. On the one hand, if it was more like windwaker a lot more people would probably play and it would be more popular since I know the touch controls were a turn off for most people for both Spirit Tracks and Phantom hourglass. But on the other hand, remaking it to be more like windwaker would make the game lose some of it’s previous identity. Like, Phantom hourglass was so unique because of the touch controls and the puzzles you can make and solve by having two screens and touch controls. And it was so nifty and handy to be able to write notes on your map. Idk, I still would like it to be remade in general even if it ends up a basically different game, but I wouldn’t change the story or the characters, especially Linebeck. The only other change I would make is the music. Phantom hourglass had rather weak themes, mainly because they re-used the same theme for the islands and the dungeons. The only songs that were really good were the few orginal tracks made for the game, so Linebeck’s theme, Oshus’s theme, both Bellum boss battle themes and the and that music that plays when you first follow the Ghost Ship. But what would you want out of a phantom hourglass remake?

Hey, I’m doing good, and I hope you are too!

I’ve thought a bit about a possible Phantom Hourglass remake, but not too much recently. I don’t really know if I’d want one, since you’d lose a lot of what really makes it special, and you can still play it through other means. I’m personally fond of the graphics and the music- yes, even the dungeon theme has grown on me- so I don’t really want a remake too badly, especially since I fear any additions/changes they might make with story or characters in a remake. The touch controls make it, and playing it on pc recreates that feeling decently well, but I don't think it'll be just the same if you had to control it with joysticks or anything.

Not to mention, there's so much emphasis on having the two screens, too, not just for map stuff, but almost every single boss had a mechanic related to the top screen! I have no fucking clue how you'd replicate that very well on something like the switch without just fucking with the mechanics altogether.

I would kill to hear some of Phantom Hourglasses tracks be orchestrated or otherwise rearranged in a higher quality. I wouldn't want any of the more notable themes altered in any way, no adding or removing of melodies and only very very small changes to the instrumentation, but I think it'd be neat to see what could be done with dungeon themes. I think a while back I had a fleeting desire to write some short tracks for each dungeon, with some ideas like mostly using instruments heard in Bellum's themes for the dungeons while each individual one gets a leading instrument unique to and reflective of the dungeon, while the Ghost Ship maybe gets a song that's a bit of a expanded version of the fog theme, while the Temple of the Ocean King could have slightly different themes the further in you got, starting with instruments more common to Oshus's theme or the great sea theme, while the further in you got the more instruments from Bellum's theme would be heard, plus some harpsichord thrown in for the hell of it.

Leave the original dungeon theme for stuff like the minor pyramids and some larger cave areas, idk. It's grown on me.

I think the only story rearranging I'd want is mayyyyybe unfridging Tetra? You could very easily shuffle some things around with her and just not damsel her for the whole game and honestly it'd still go off perfectly without a hitch. But you'd still have to deal with the World of the Ocean King being a whole other world, so either bring her and her crew in and have them as wandering ship npcs (the better idea) or just leave them out (not a good idea) but either way it's better than what they actually did. I just don't think I'd want it to switch to Tetra being a major reoccurring character tbh, the main character dynamics in PH are good as they are.

I think I like Phantom Hourglass too much as it is to really want a remake at all. I'd rather we get something like an anime adaptation. That's what I think about more. Give me animated Phantom Hourglass with some fun takes on the dungeons and fights and some fun slice of life stuff with the group between the islands what I want is a Phantom Hourglass anime

#asks #zeldanamikaze #salty talks #loz #legend of zelda #phantom hourglass #kinda just boils down to like. i kinda want it to remain untouched with nothing added or removed if that makes sense #different themes for the dungeons would be rlly cool. harpsichord for deeper ocean king temple floors bc its where you meet linebeck #also vague foreshadowing? as an aside how many other loz songs have harpsichord in it im very curious to know #also. i say i dont mind the dungeon theme while also not really minding my tinnitus so also take that in mind maybe. brain go brrrrrr #i think adding tetra in to the main crew of ph would kinda be a bit much and also maybe not add very much. fyi i have not played ww #but i feel like it'd almost be adding another ciela cuz shed support link and be more barbed and bold with a side of less morally upstandin #so i dont really think she'd being much new to the ph crew table and i wouldnt want her there in a remake cuz they might pull the #goddess blood card and i really really like how ph has fuck all to do with hyrule or any of that nonsense #sorry this took so long btw. i dont think much abt a ph remake so i dont have a lot of notes #additions? idk add more rooms to linebecks ship. let us poke around in a few areas. maybe potion storage. give link a room #let us poke around in linebeck's room when possible. put smth fun in there. pull a wilds era and give him a journal for us to check out #what they did with tetra kills me (but not too much since i dont rlly have thoughts on tetra) bc you could just remove her entirely #and the story would still work really well anyways. holy character fridging batman #idfk. give us a silly loz dating game. make linebeck an option. thats what i wanna see

[mitamicah]

.

#I have thoughts about the new tour yet I am not sure if I should share (given why I do so in tags) #I am not surprised to see denmark is absent #I am a bit surprised to see no scandinavian country AT ALL #not surprised to see germany and the uk have most dates (that's sadly something I've seen a lot from bands/artists I like) #a little befundled with the route he has scheduled for both germany and the uk dates #glad to see other countries like switzerland france and the netherlands get their debut #not surprised it is in october since that seems to be around the same time for his europe antics last year as well #all this said I am a bit conflicted what to do myself #I'd like to go to gigs on this tour #yet I've already run out of the country four times these past upcoming five months (three times to finland) #since it is quite expensive and maybe not something I will have time for given I hopefully get an internship in august #with that in mind I feel like I should probably go for only a few dates #and yet last time I felt very much like I was missing out and overlooked because I didn't go to “more than two shows” #and here is where I feel like my thoughts are probably not great #i was thinking about maybe going for hamburg as first priority since it is the closest (4 hours in train) #then have frankfurt and munich as second priorities making it a little mini tour #I am not sure if I'd physically and mentally be able to do more than three gigs in a row #yet if I am I sort of want to go to zurich too because I've never been there #two days to decide is not very long #I feel very stressed tbh #and I hope noone will take this in any wrong way #please I really dont want to feel shit again #I know my last concert related take was on the fence #(even though as it turned out the venue did worse than me in that regard) #but this one is really just me thinking about what would be the smartest plan #other possible options would be to go for zurich since it is in a weekend (sunday) and then - depending on whether or not I have work #either go home or follow jere to amsterdam (then maybe paris and brussels) #another option is berlin then hamburg and then to home from there (so two shows) #or london and bristol since its the weekend (maybe manchester as well if it is not far - so up to three shows) #the latter I am a bit concerned about since being trans in the uk is not great atm

[slippery-minghus]

hmm. had an actual conversation with nightmare coworker today that seemed mutually productive. she apologized for saying some bullshit that hurt my feelings and i clarified that my intentions are to help not to undermine her, and we both agreed that there's no competition against each other and that it's the lack of growth in our role that's the problem. it was...productive.

and further cementing for me that it is time to begin making my Exit. i will be sending out my resume to a few places this weekend.

i'm still processing the conversation, and am struggling to place myself in where i am responsible to better my behavior. because i genuinely don't want to be an ass, even though i really don't like this lady and will jump for joy the day i never have to see her again. she stated that she knows my intentions aren't to hurt her, and that she thinks i'm very kind. i apologized for if my behavior came off as undermining her, and said that my intentions are only to better my own growth—and that i know she's trying to succeed too. i validated her feelings, and complemented the effort she is putting in.

where i'm struggling with is: am i in the wrong/causing harm and needing to change if the issue is that her feelings are incongruent with what she knows of my intentions? her feelings are her responsibility (WOW i almost typed "her feelings are my responsibility". i feel like that's a freudian slip) and she states that she knows i don't mean to hurt her. i'm going to try to be more clear in wording my intentions with her (she feels like me trying to take work off her plate is to undermine her. when really, i'm caught up and see her getting overwhelmed, and i want to help and also have something to do since i'm bored).

but i'm really struggling to look at my role in this and pass judgement on myself. i can and want to do better, and i don't think i did anything wrong, but i'm always so hesitant to say it's not my fault or i didn't do something bad. like i can't trust my judgement on that. my intentions were good, her bad feelings are ones caused by her insecurities, which she more or less has expressed to be aware that they are not true—the hurtful thing she said to me, she acknowledged was said out of hurt and not what she actually thinks. so, is it fair to say i'm not the bad guy? i'm not in the wrong? i know good intentions that still result in harm don't absolve anyone, but when the things that are clashing are insufficient communication and reactive insecurities... i'm not a monster, am i?

#well. i AM probably a monster for how much i dislike this lady #but i don't ACT on it #and i genuinely couldn't care less about her. i participate in decent human pleasantries because i am a decent human. #and at work we're stuck together #the thing that's irked me so much about this conversation is just.. her self centeredness #that she thinks everyone is out to get her. to undermine her. whatever. #bitch nobody cares about you enough one way or the other to put in that kind of effort. i sure don't #i empathize but i do not sympathize. to feel that pit that makes you feel like the worst kind of center of attention #i get it. but genuinely you are not the main character and no one is going to spend their limited time and energy to slowly attack you #you are not the cat with all the knives pointed at it #it's a terrible feeling to feel like you are! but when it influences your behavior to the point that you are making snide comments #to people who have no option not to interact with you then uh. then you're in the wrong buddy #and the people around you (who cannot easily leave! bc work!) should not have to bend over backwards to assure you #that they're not pointing knives at you. to protect themselves from your feelings making you say mean shit #like yes. i can be more clear with my intentions. i'm generally not the greatest at that. but my baseline that i want to #modify my behavior from is NOT one that a regular well adjusted person would take as anything but kind #and if a regular well adjusted person got a little offput by me volunteering to take work off their hands we would've had a very chill #3 sentence conversation about it MONTHS AGO. #i understand and respect (even if i find it annoying and overbearing) the need for me to announce my intentions like im working in a kitchen #and saying 'hot water' or 'knife' as i move around other people but we shouldn't have reached this conclusion this way #and frankly who's to fucking say me being more clear with my intentions will only feed the flames of her thinking i'm out to get her! #'i caught up on my stuff and your plate looks full. i'm bored. anything i can do to help?' could be a pointed knife for all i know!! #and if it is- and my actions still hurt her in that scenario- am i still responsible for the hurt caused?? #like WHERE DOES IT FUCKING E N D ? #personal #*exhales* okay i feel better now #i just hate talking about my interactions with her bc i just want NOTHING to do with it. i want her out of my head!! #but until i process it i can't let go #and i'm still going to have to go over all of this with my shrink tomorrow #it just makes me mad how much of my time this bitch takes up. i'm not getting paid to think about work right now!!!!

[robotic-maid]

How things are going again… update I guess? Still can’t figure out how to read more on mobile. I’m just typing this out so it can leave my head.

#nights are really hard for me #mornings are also really hard for me #I think my jobs burning me out #and I haven’t been able to sleep very well much at all #I’ve only been getting 3-5 hours if I’m lucky because my nightmares are really bad so I usually just stay awake #I mean I have to get up at 4am anyway so what’s the point #do you know how it feels to be in pain but you can’t cry because your body’s grown so used to it? #so it feels like crying because it’s Wednesday again #which I can’t justify because tommorrow is Thursday and that is your new normal #your new normal is working so hard you don’t have the time to see your dog and your cars ac is out and you spend all your money on the room #you sleep in 15 minutes away from the office you are stuck at more than 11hoirs a day #you ask your job to adjust your schedule and they say they can’t without cutting your hours and you need the money to survive #it’s too much #but feeling this way or not feeling this way won’t make a difference because the only other options will make your living situation harder #I’m so tired but I don’t have any better options right now so I have to keep waking up and working #I feel horrible spending time with me friends because I get tired after an hour and I worry that I’ve become #too flaky or something #I can’t stay up late and I’m already stressed out so I just can’t keep up with everyone and I don’t want to be a drain #I wish my heart would just stop some times #my meds stop me from hurting myself or crying or sleeping too long but these feelings always come to me when I wake up #I’m disappointed I woke up again #I don’t want to keep doing this I don’t know how long I can keep going #my body is breaking down like my car is breaking down #I don’t want to keep doing this I need more than a day off work a week I want to see my dog I don’t want to be poor but I don’t want to #wake up just to spend all day in an office getting yelled at while my coworkers come in and leave before me #I know I can do this I know I need to keep doing this I know there’s nothing better for me than this #I shouldn’t say these horrible things out loud because they’ll just wear me down faster #there’s nothing that will help me I need to help myself #this is en endurance test and I need to keep it up because if I fail I will lose so much more than I have #I wish I could cry I wish I could break down and scream but what would be the point? it won’t help it won’t fix anything m

[seenthisepisode]

~~~

#i am close to tears - beware there is a rant about my life in the tags ahead so watch out - it's nothing VERY serious but it's... well #also this is literally about supernatural convention so it's not like a serious problem but it is a problem for me personally #so anyway last year when they announced misha for purgatory con 8 in dusseldorf i was like yes yes yes and i bought the tickets because: #1. i had a whole year to plan a trip 2. going to spn con was this little dream of mine because i've been in this fandom for years so #so i thought hey i deserve a little treat. i want to and deserve to go to a con and they just announced misha and i'd love to go #(and then they also announced jensen. and then jared too so like all 3 main guys will be there so !! a Treat !! yay!) and also Why Not #because it's in germany so it's the closest i would ever get a convention because i am from poland [*] no conventions here sorry #so i was like yeah the stars seem to have alligned yeah AND I BOUGHT THE TICKET. and the thing is SOLD OUT. and 3 main actor men are there #and a lot of mutuals that i'd finally love to meet maybe if they feel like it or whatever but i'd love to meet tumblr people so there's tha #and now. i just spent 3 hours after work looking for flights and everything. and. the conclusion. after 3 hours of looking at every possibl #way for me to get to Dusseldorf at the days of the con. well. the conclusion is i have no way to get there. and i am stuck. #and there are flights and they are not even that expensive. but the HOURS are horrible. i checked different airports and even looked at #flights to dortmund and i literally have no way to get there in a way that makes any sense... because arriving at 4pm on saturday is #too late. and the other option is being there at 8 am - cool - but i have no way of getting to the airport at 4 am. i'd have to take #additional day off from work (not an option). and i literally don't know what to do. it's almost 1 am and i should be happily asleep and i #am trying to solve this problem lmao because on one hand i really want to go and i want to figure out a way to get there 1. on time 2. in a #way that won't cost me 1/3 of my paycheck ; and on the other hand i just want to email the organizer to return the ticket or resell it to #someone because i know there will be someone who wants to go because the event is sold out #WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE THIS HARD...... #AS I WRITE THIS I AM FULLY AWARE THIS IS SUCH A FIRST WORLD PROBLEM i know!!!!!! fully aware!!!! #but i just :(( really wanted to go :((( but i am slowly leaning towards the option of not going :((( because money and time :(( #and the kilometers between me and the con place :((((( #personal

[collegeoflore]

god but watching all the ascension stuff w/ramza last night has me so insane about xarrastarion. because like the thing is he never really Stops wanting to manipulate them up until the ritual happens (there is some nuance to what’s happening After that if i get into now i’ll get nothing done at work today at all lol) but just instead of “how can i keep myself safe” it’s “how can i keep them mine” and it’s not about possessiveness (deeply not a thing for the two of them) it’s about well. that one fucking line after you ascend him. “he will always see you as degrading yourself if you continue to be with him.” and it’s not about being insecure or whatever like idk it would be very easy to woobify him here and to be like “poor baby is insecure and sad etc etc etc” and yeah there’s an element here of like. feeling unworthy or whatever. but he’s not really wallowing in that? it’s not the tear filled “why would you ever love someone like me :((((((“ conversations i think people want to see with characters like this it’s very much like. i’m going to do everything i can to Make you love me. i know you said you care for me but the clock is ticking and eventually my burdens will be too much to bear and i have to make the value proposition of my being in your life sound appealing despite all that. he feels that way regardless, but once you get to the ritual the difference between ascended and spawn endings is that for ascended it’s “maybe you like degrading yourself” and spawn recognizes that they don’t see it as degrading at all.

and i think with xarrai specifically like. he believes they care for him. he believes they intend to help him kill cazador come hell or high water. but he also believes them to be someone who is calculating and always aware of the cost and benefit of keeping people around (whether he’s 100% right about that is a different story tho) and so he feels like. idk. the stakes feel high no matter how honestly they try to show him they care for him and need and want nothing else from him. i feel like that line after the spawn ambush that’s like “i’m doing this for you too, you know. to make sure we’re both safe.” is exactly the heart of it - it’s a very valid interpretation to say that’s more manipulation and is entirely a lie but i think there’s something compelling in seeing it as true. manipulative to an extent, but true. xarrai could tell him honestly and plainly that they absolutely want nothing more than his companionship and he would Still be trying to find a way to keep them his because i think the idea of losing what they have, of losing whatever “something real” means is like. unthinkable. and drives him to consider ascension the only option because it would allow him to keep hold of the things he wants and loves; power, sunlight, and them.

#had a whole conversation with a united states congressman in the middle of writing this post btw #shoutouts to earl blumenauer i guess #ANYWAY this is rambly and all over the place but i’m like. so so so compelled by like #idk. neither of them know what something real is. #but as long as power is on the table it is an Option and it’s not until xarrai lays out plainly what they know he’s thinking #that astarion recognizes that making them his spawn would. not be something real. #but there are 100% other factors and also by the time they’re talking about it it is Very late in the game for him to change his mind #IDK i think the manipulation that continues to happen even After he decides to stop manipulating them is soooo interesting #because like. he doesn’t know how to do anything without manipulation #and like. well. he can’t be certain they’re not still manipulating him. #he’s in love with them and he trusts them but he also knows. because they are mirrors of one another. that they’re still a manipulator #how can either of them ever be anything else? #i like them. is thing. #and do not want to be working rn #i need to put my phone away before mr congressman comes back goodbye #漫言 #oc. xarrai #r. hold me like a knife

[coquelicoq]

yessssss we have arrived at the night before the count's duel with albert! mercédès is here! she's calling him edmond! she's begging him to spare her son's life!! she's saying shit like "avenge yourself, edmond! but avenge yourself on the guilty; avenge yourself on fernand, avenge yourself on me, but don't avenge yourself on my son!" and he's roaring in despair and seizing handfuls of his hair and AGREEING TO IT even though it means HE will have to die instead (because albert threw a glove in his face in full view of everyone at the opera a couple hours ago and men are such babies about that) and he will be dying without having achieved his vengeance, which in his mind is akin to god making all of creation and then on the seventh day "extinguishing the sun and pushing the world back into eternal night" (this is literally how he talks btw) and she's thanking him and telling him she still loves him and two little tears are coming to his eyes (but they disappear because, and i quote, "no doubt god had sent an angel to collect them") and then she's leaving and he's sitting there head in hands ("as if his brow alone could no longer support the weight of his thoughts") saying to himself "i was mad not to tear out my heart the day i swore revenge"! YES! YES! YESSSSSSSSS!!!!

#THIS IS THE SHIT WE HAVE COME TO SEE!!! #when she called him edmond i would have gasped but i was reading aloud so instead i just made the count's response very emotional #which it was supposed to be anyway so that worked out #because i'm reading this one chapter per day i knew yesterday that this was gonna happen today #and all day yesterday i was imagining how the conversation would go #i've read it before so i do remember the result of the conversation but i didn't remember the details #and like. it's SO good. it completely lived up to my expectations #he tells her fernand put him in jail! she tells him she's been dreaming EVERY NIGHT for the last TEN YEARS that he escaped from prison #by disguising himself as a dead body (which is actually what happened!!) but then was killed when the jailers threw the body #into the ocean!!!! #he's saying you want your son to live? okay. he'll live. and she's saying yes yes there's the edmond i love!! #and he's saying well you won't have much longer to love him because tomorrow morning HE'LL BE DEAD!! #because your son insulted me publicly and the thing i love most in the world after you (!!!!) is my dignity #so if i can't kill him then the only other option is to DIE BY HIS HAND #because that was the most dramatic possible way he could have relayed that information. fucking superb you funky little drama queen #the count of monte cristo #my posts

[rohirric-hunter]

The other good news is that I was able to afford enough LP to get the Gondor Renewed quest pack and some mithril coins (to buy houses in Lyndelby)

#lotro #cycling through the hairstyles like a carousel tho #the ones ive been using make me very uncomfortable #because neither leonys nor me would go around adventuring or fighting in hair that long without braiding it or tying it back #theres no braided hair option for human women (there is for elves) #and the only sort of medium length tied back option is like. well im using it on my helena pc so obviously i cant use it on leonys too #its also just not her #ive cycled through the very short ones again and im giving number 8 a try #when i first built leonys i recall rejecting it because it was too flat #but its got a bit of volume with the recent update #i still dont care for the way it sweeps forward at the cheeks but weve got to make sacrifices #and i cant see that all the time #not like the way number 2 only looks stupid from the back somehow #(to be entirely fair. i also recall when i first built leonys i hated number 2) #(i picked it because it was the closest to what i envisioned but i didnt really like it) #(obviously i came to love it) #but yeah head on and from the back im liking number 8 #its just from the side that its not working for me #idk ill keep looking #im starting to get calm enough about it that i trust myself to make another post about it on the forums

[giantkillerjack]

Oh I have consumed too much Christian discourse I need to have gay sex immediately

#it is an ecclesiastical emergency #original #i got more or less the answers i needed and a good deal more i didn't need. it all comes down to faith now. #which is to say faith is rather hard to debate and so i am politely excusing myself now #it was a cult i grew up in too much discourse is bad for the belly #at least the christian kind anyway. i doubt I'd have such a reaction to buddhist discourse but either way all the religions appear to have #the same amount of conclusive evidence. which is to say they are faiths so they don't work on an evidence based system #but the REAL point here is i feel kinda gross now and my immediate instinct is to suck a thousand dicks #boy i really have changed huh #hmmmmmmm #i have limited options because i am very sick but I'll just have to like. suck a dick for the devil later i guess. #dicks.... #i tried to take in more of the densely philosophical responses - which to their credit were apparently well made and with good will #but my brain started shutting down and was like i need my tongue to be. in a cunt. NOW. #fuckin A #shitpost #anyway i still think if there is a god then he is a real bastard. which i think is actually what Gnosticism is! #but as interesting as that would be i think there are enough cruel and powerful beings to explain things as is #man i miss sucking cock i need to work on getting healthier just for that. it's not that it's hard to find cock it's that i would rather #something something funny joke than go on grindr again. yipes. not my bag personally

[loverboybrightsideghost]

god i love being a musician

#it's funny to me how i'm literally Anxiety McGee but in auditions i'm like audition? no problem 👌🏼 #I LOVE BEING A MUSICIAN BRO ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ #it's fun. it's cathartic. sometimes it's very frustrating. #you'll have periods of time where you're like 'aw hell yeah i'm improving so much i'm so good >:D' #and there will be other points where you'll feel like shit and all you can do is push through #well not push through but you have to remind yourself why you do what you do #and you have to remind yourself that when you're being challenged you have two options: complain and quit or you can work hard at it #and go through it and come out an even better musician on the other side when you've passed #it's crazy how much i've changed as a musician and as a person in the past ten months. it's really crazy #LIKE THATS THE POWER OF MUSIC BABY! #i am lucky to have very supportive people in my everyday and musical life. and it's a good thing that from what i can tell #the music world is becoming kinder too #we're more aware of problems and pain and being like 'hey this isn't right' #i'm not sure if this is viola-specific but at least in the viola world there seems to be a lot more people with a focus on the body #and how to play without hurting yourself #which you'd think would be a given but nope! a lot of people are like This Is The Best Wy To Play #and that's not true for everyone #some people have big hands someone people have small hands some people are short some people have long-ass necks #everyone has to be comfortable when they play because that's when they'll play their best #ANYWAYS #i fucking love being a musician this is brought to you by yesterday i was practicing how to perform which is so cool and fun :)