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pupcuck · 1 month

Text

ASKING FOR IT !

ft. og4 leon s. kennedy x fem!reader

tags. p in v, smut, cheating (not on reader), ooc leon sorry, he’s mean, negging, misogyny, reference to past rape/non-con, unresolved trauma, suicidal thoughts duhhh, he calls reader ugly a lot, leon subs for his gf but doms reader, non-con to consensual sex, manipulation, some .. uh waterboarding? he dunks your head in water, opioid addiction but it’s minor LMFAOO

note. haii… um feedback whether it’s good or bad appreciated really forced myself to write this so im like ack. hating everything i write but! ignore typos :3 it’s not as fleshed out as i wanted .. soooo it reads pretty jolty but yah 😭 and the smut is like not. IDK I’m ugh not into it just couldn’t bring myself to extend stuff that I really wanted to develop n he’s ooc. BUT!! again ignore typos or I’ll cry n feedback/constructive criticism appreciated <3

Leon has a girlfriend. He can never hold down a girl, his ability to scare women away is preternatural, so it’s a big deal. And she’s fucking hot. Not like model hot, but pornstar hot. She’s got tits so firm they might as well be bulletproof. Bottle blonde with eyes that swallow up her whole face. Her stomach doesn’t crease when she sits. It’s the type of beauty that takes its form in slashes of red lace and nylon. Not many women are out of his league, but she is.

They have hot sex like attractive people tend to do, and it goes something along the lines of this.

He goes:

Is that dick good, baby? You like it? Right there, baby?

And she goes:

Fuck, yes, baby! Harder, deeper— Oh, right there!

And then she doesn’t cum.

So there’s that, but he’s working on it.

Leon doesn’t take well to tips on how to fuck. Reading advice columns in the Men’s Health magazine leaves a funny taste in his mouth. It might be the blood from the castrated image of his masculinity. Who knows.

He struggles with that sort of thing. A nice face does nothing for a man who doesn’t actually like anything about himself. Leon’s still that wimpy self-hating loser he was all those years ago. In all fairness to God, there are a few added tweaks here and there. Some bug fixes. Now he’s drunk and shallow too! Misanthropic when he’s at his very best.

As a kid, mom told Leon to be a nice boy so he was a nice boy. Not because he was ever a particularly nice boy, but for her sake. So instead of acting out he would go and crush ants beneath his thumb in the front yard because there is this mean part of Leon that splinters inside of him like cooked bones.

Life to Leon is being fucked into apologising for being alive so it’s no wonder he’s still harbouring the insecurities of a boy he isn't.

When he was eighteen it was by ugly old men who abhorred him for being the embodiment of whatever it was they were hiding from their wives. His legs looked nice thrown over a pair of big shoulders. They were so thin back then, model-type shit. All of those men mildly resembled his dad, but that’s something he wouldn’t quite like to crack down on yet. Leon’s being open enough as it is.

When he was twenty-one it was his headache of a first girlfriend. It was the bullet wound in his shoulder. When he was twenty-two it was being passed around boot camp like a dirty needle. When he was twenty-seven it was Luis who was nothing and everything in between. It was a picture book princess like Ashley. The scar on his shoulder. Stigmata. Glory Be. Whatever.

(And Jack, it was always Jack. Pale all over like a healed scar.)

What Leon is trying to get across, he’s not quite sure. Maybe that he's nice in theory and the reality is he’s a self-confessed charlatan of niceness. Or that he can’t fuck. He can’t fuck because he is deeply traumatised. Yeah. Maybe that’s what he’s trying to say. It’s an excuse, sure, doesn’t make it the truth though. Leon can’t fuck ‘cause he’s useless at most things that don’t include guns. He can’t fuck ‘cause he was unattractive as a teenager and that solidified the way he feels about himself now.

Leon’s got one thing going for him - he fingers her pussy till his fingers prune. Eats her out till he gets lockjaw.

“Oh, you’re so good at that,” she says, kissing his slicked-up lips.

Then her eyes flit to his hard dick and she gives him that strange half-smile. One that seems to say: Not with that. His dick. Obviously.

His shit is big enough, it’s long enough— It’s enough. And it’s pretty. Could put a bow on to make it real cute. Could manufacture a dildo inspired by it. So Leon cannot for the life of him wrap his head around her problem. It’s not his dicks fault her pussy is fucking broken. Her broken pussy doesn’t get to make his dick sad. Doesn’t get to lay devastating blows on his gone-with-the-wind ego.

Another thing is, her sister is an ugly bitch. That upsets Leon and his dick in tow. You’re a student, taking a break for some reason Leon has not bothered to fathom. He couldn’t care less. Go do it someplace else. In this house, you’re nothing more than a cockblock. Leon could forgive you for being a cockblock if you weren’t ugly. Or vice versa.

It would be okay if Leon wasn’t stuck at home with you for hours at a time. Work fucked up his back, so he’s staying here in his girlfriend’s apartment eating her food, running her taps, fucking her badly and shitting on her sister.

You’re sat on the other end of the table with a soggy bowl of cereal while he nurses a juice box like a real man. What do ugly little things like you think about anyway?

When Leon was ugly he thought about forcing his dick into the cute girl next door between his more regular thoughts of what to eat for dinner and whether he stocked up on toilet paper or not.

When he was ugly, his day was made simply by a pretty girl looking in his general direction. So Leon makes sure to look in yours. Y’know, to fuel your perverted wet dreams. Your rape fantasies. What freaks think about when they’re near hot guys. Well, it’s strange actually. You tend to totally ignore him. When the two of you make brief eye contact, you don’t flounder or duck or bow your head like you’re shy— You just move on with your life. That bothers him. Leon’s hot now. He’s not the type of man you just brush over like that. He’s the type you gawk at in broad daylight, he’s the sort of guy you see in soft porn magazines.

“Good morning,” his girlfriend greets, “have a good sleep, sweetie?” She bumps your hip when you stand up to hug her.

She’s wearing stockings today. Oh, he loves stockings. He loves pencil skirts. He loves— He loves office wear. He wants to be put over her lap and spanked raw perhaps.

“Yeah, it’d be nice if your boyfriend stopped moaning like a girl though.” It’s said into her ear, but Leon hears it.

“I’m going now, honey,” his girlfriend tells him.

Like a good boy, Leon stands to bid her goodbye. Her blouse is sheer, shows off her black bra and he eyes it with distaste.

“What’s wrong, Leon?”

He doesn’t speak. Just glares at her perfect set of tits like a baby weaned off milk.

“I can’t take them off,” she snorts.

Leon wishes she could. Hang ‘em up in the closet and pop them back on when it’s time to play. Tits are for the bedroom. Otherwise, they’re too much of a distraction. Instead, he settles on slipping his hand up her skirt to check if she’s wearing panties. (There’s no panty line showing through her pencil skirt and that’s always a bad sign.) She shoos him away.

So Leon leans in for a kiss, and she says, “Nuh-uh, honey, you’ll ruin my makeup.” Then she gives in ‘cause Leon can be kinda cute when he tries hard enough. “Just one, okay?”

“Yeah.” Leon nods. Her kisses are analgesic. Which is unfortunate considering he has an opioid addiction. Almost an addiction.

“One,” she counts, Leon kisses her again, “two, three, four.”

She’s teasing him now.

“Okay, well, keep an eye on her, Leon.”

“I’m not twelve,” you say, exiting the kitchen to spare yourself the sight of him groping your older sister.

Yeah, and Leon’s not a bang nanny.

He wipes the red from his lips, takes his juice box from the table where you’re no longer and decides jerking off in the shower will make him feel better. Leon does. He finishes. Watches his seed wash down the drain and wonders if that was wasteful. A short intermission is taken, then he jerks off in front of her full-body mirror. His biceps flex and his abs tighten, and he looks fucking good.

Why isn’t she cumming? What’s wrong with her? Is she getting too old? Is menopause hitting already? She’s only thirty-something. It can’t be that, and she asked Leon to pick up tampons last week— Unless they were for you.

Nobody in this house tells Leon anything. Another shower is what he needs. No, he needs a smoke. Leon doesn’t smoke. He does the next best thing, rests idly against the railings of her balcony, observing the ballet of D.C. life. Man, he could throw himself over right now. Splat against the asphalt and that would be it. It’d all be over. Hauling his weight over would be no problem. Catastrophizing to pass the time. Men used to do this for a living in Ancient Greece. What happened to philosophising? Leon could be a philosopher, all they did was spout nonsense and he is good at that. Not at fucking, however.

Beer. Yeah. Beer. That’s what he needs. Leon ransacks the fridge to no avail. Health-conscious living is the reason for misery, he believes. See, very insightful, modern-day Socrates right here. Lean proteins, vegan substitutes, low-fat yoghurt— It’s so girly it makes him sick.

“She’s still on a health kick,” you say from behind him, “I thought it was a New Years thing, but she’s still, like, super into it.”

Why are you talking to him? Leon blinks at you owlishly. “Right,” he says.

You give him a funny look, turning back to the counter to use the coffee machine. Don’t you want him? You’re not shy. Why aren’t you shy? Shouldn’t you be shy? Ugly Leon was mute around girls whether they were short, fat, ugly or pretty. Shit, he is clucking for a beer.

“There's Chardonnay under the sink.” Well, that’s unhelpful.

“Yeah, I don’t- I don’t drink that.” He would like to finish his sentence off with ‘girly shit’ but you seem like the type to find that offensive.

“Figured.” The coffee machine whirs. A lobotomised silence ensues. “Good talk.”

You’re so ugly you’re asking for it. Perfect subject for the ‘I can’t make my girlfriend cum, is her pussy broken?’ experiment. Ugly girls don’t count as a fuck, right? Not when they’re sent to the very back of your mind after said fuck. He wonders how many girls counted the uglier him as an official lay.

You’re on your tummy reading a book. The Beautiful and Damned. Leon had no idea they wrote a book about him. The door creaking exposes his creeping against his will.

“Do you need something?” you ask without batting an eye.

The swell of your ass is nice. “Uh, yeah, I do.”

Rolling over and sitting up to face him, you tilt your head to the side. “Go on.”

“I want to have sex with you.” Woah. Okay. That’s a genie he can’t put back in the bottle. Fuck, why does he do this stupid shit? Leon should just kill himself. All roads lead to suicide. Every sign points towards suicide and he is still holding on for dear life.

Think about Sherry. Sherry won’t care, kids hit sixteen and don’t give a fuck about much, he reasons with the voice in his head. How about Claire? Oh, she’ll think good fucking riddance. Redfield? No way. You are truly out of options, Kennedy.

“I’m sorry?”

Oh, god no, Leon’s the one that should be sorry. “You heard me.” The apology comes out incredibly wrong. “I’m helping you out.”

“Helping me out with what? I’m sorry, Leon, I didn’t… I didn’t think I— I don’t know what made you think I wanted this from you, but I don’t like you—“

You don’t like him? Why not? He’d like a list of reasons with a page-long explanation. What’s not to like? The hair. It’s the hair. Blond is too girly. That’s what it is.

“—I mean, you’re with my sister, did you really think I would say yes? I’m sorry, I’m just a little confused, where is this coming from? Gosh, I really… I don’t know what to say.”

“I’m helping you out,” Leon repeats, using his hands to gesture at your face, at your body. “No one else is gonna do it.” This apology has gone way out of bounds. A simple sorry would have sufficed.

“What..?” Something doleful crosses your face, then it twists unpleasantly. “You think I want to have sex with you… ‘cause I’m not cute? Like, you think I’m…”

Ugly, yes. He does. Only a little. Can you turn over? He wants to make you cum. “You’re a virgin, yeah?”

“Oh my god, there’s, like, something wrong with you!” You stand to your full height in a pitiful attempt to appear frightening. That face is enough to scare a man away already. “Get out— And I am so telling her when she gets back home, I told her I didn’t like you, I told her and now you just-“

Leon grabs you by the jaw, squeezes you so tight it clicks. “Okay, sweetheart, here’s how this is going to go,” he starts, taking both your wrists in a single hand, “we’re going to start over, and you’re going to be a good little girl and apologise to me like you really mean it.”

“Apologise for what?” It comes out muffled through your forced pout so he chooses to ignore you.

“I don’t know what you fuckin’ said.” Leon should just end it here, he should let go of you and check into the nearest asylum. He’s hot. Leon is box blond. He’s tall enough to dwarf most girls. His face is nice. His body is nicer. So he doesn’t know what his problem is. Once pinned down, you shrink away from him, expression so sour your skin looks ready to melt off your skull.

And then he fucks you till you stop screaming. He leaves you in a withered heap, heads back to his room to take a well-deserved nap, hides his face in the pillows. They smell like her. He should think about killing himself some more. That gun looks awfully shiny. Nth time could be the charm.

She gets home in the evening, drops her bag on the floor to alert him of her entrance.

“I missed you.” Leon noses at her neck.

“You were sleeping.” She ruffles his hair like he’s a child.

“I still missed you.”

“Even when you’re sleeping?”

In the least creepy way possible, he wants to wear her skin as a suit, and she thinks his body doesn’t yearn for her at every sleeping second?

“The most when I’m sleeping, have bad dreams without you,” Leon mumbles groggily.

“How cute,” she muses, “good day?”

“Great day.” Leon nods. “Real productive.”

“Oh yeah? What’d you get up to?” A singular red nail strokes along his spine.

“Thought about you,” he answers, leaving out the part where he spent half of his time jerking off. Oh, and the part where he fucked her sister into submission. He raped you. He did. Leon doesn’t like that word. Far too harsh.

“Now, don’t push it, mister.” When she smiles there’s a lack of wrinkles— Not even smile lines, it’s artificial almost.

Leon’s good at pushing buttons. He should get paid for it. “It’s true, if you said jump I’d ask how high.”

“You’re so funny, Leon.” She kisses his head and laughs all prim and proper.

“Serious, babe, I’m super partial to jumping,” he says to hear her laugh again. He’s more partial to suicide. It’s great. A one-way ticket off of God’s green inferno. Who would he even be without suicide ideation?

“Alright, but I’d like you all in one piece.” She kisses his cheek. “No jumping, okay, honey?” She kisses his neck and his collarbones and his Adam’s apple and he’s unable to breathe.

“Okay,” Leon says. He gets it now. She’s mommying him. Maybe this is what Leon needs. To play house. A daddy to fuck his throat and a mommy to sit on his dick and tell him that he’s a good boy and he’s needed and he won’t have to think if he has a mommy and daddy to do that for him.

Can he backtrack on the rape thing? Trust Leon to take a good thing and ruin it in the worst way possible. If he kissed you he could’ve wormed his way out of it. Told her it was the medication he’s on, that he had a mental breakdown, a midlife crisis.

At dinner, your silence slips under the radar like cumstains on motel bedsheets. You pick at your food, and when Leon’s knee brushes yours under the table, you excuse yourself. Sometimes he thinks that he is a bad person, this can be backed up by many things. Violating you might outweigh saving the world.

In bed, he thinks about changing, about calling his therapist in the morning, he might take a leap off that balcony, cleaning up his act sounds terribly hard. Leon does this all with his head tucked into the hollow of his girlfriend’s neck. The thinking has killed his boner and now he can’t get it up. So he pretends to fall asleep. It’s an unconvincing performance ‘cause the moment she swipes a hand over his ass he lets out a disgruntled noise. Leon clenches so quickly his stomach caves in.

“You don’t like that, honey?”

He shakes his head, overgrown bangs falling in his eyes. Leon has a nice ass. It’s no wonder she wants to touch it, leg presses have done him wonders, but still, it’s off-limits. She can’t sweet talk her way into this anytime soon.

“Why, Leon?” She’s cupping his ass like he’s a girl. Leon’s not a girl. “You’d look so cute.”

“No,” he whines, and it sounds kind of sexy. He gets it. He can see the appeal.

“I think you just need some encouragement, baby.” She’s taking him apart like a gun. Folding him like laundry. Milks his prostate so well he sleeps like a baby. Not even a shadow of an orgasm to be seen from her side.

She leaves early the next morning and he’s left alone to ruminate. What he finds out today is that you’re pretty diligent at sucking dick when forced.

Leon thinks he would like to break you in a way that only he can fix.

He pushes your head down on his dick till your lips are stretched so far they split at the corners, you gag wetly each time the fat tip knocks the back of your throat, heavy balls slapping against your chin.

“Aww, look at you,” Leon coos, “little girl taking big things.”

Fat tears well in your eyes, a faint tremor betrays your effort to hold them back, a single blink and they roll down your cheeks like dewdrops. It might be the dick lodged in your throat, pulsing under your tongue— Yeah, no, it’s his dick in your mouth. That’s why you're upset. No other reason for it. Leon finds you a little ungrateful. A lot of women would pay for this, to drain his balls. Hell, your sister loves to do it.

“One at a time, sweetheart,” he says as he guides you to his balls, “can’t have you choking, can we?” You look up at him blankly. Leon thought he was funny and that’s all that matters. “Go on, spit on ‘em, get me nice and wet.” The drool pooling beneath your tongue drizzles his balls in clear strings, his drippy tip bumps the bridge of your nose, rests comfy on your brow ridge.

You’re struggling real bad. He’ll take it as a compliment. The thing is, you refuse to just lick them, pulling off each ball with a wet pop! and a dry cough. Leon starts to zone out so he shoves you off and quite pathetically, you fall flat on your back.

“You didn’t shave,” Leon notes in distaste, he was going to do you a favour too.

“No— Not for you.” You squirm like a fish on the docks when he hovers over you.

“Not for me, right.”

“Anyone but you.”

“You're not gonna do it for anyone, sweetheart, know why?” Leon clicks his tongue when you dodge his kiss, twisting your neck to keep a distance.

“Why?”

“No one else wants you,” he states, “you’re lucky that I want you.”

“Well, that’s not true.” You’re stubborn amongst all your other undesirable traits.

Leon scoffs. “What, so you ever had a boyfriend?” He runs his index finger along your slit. Bone dry. Serious? He assumes you’re still sore from yesterday.

“That’s none of your fucking business.”

“Don’t get mad at me, honey, I’m just helping you out.” Leon spits on your pussy, then on his thick cock for good measure, jerks his shaft and presses a thumb to his tip to guide it into you. Your lips fold inwards around him as he breaches your tiny hole. There’s too much resistance for it to be a smooth sailing journey, and you’re new to cock, cunt pushing him out as your body tenses. “I’m being nice to you, so you should say thank you.”

“Oh, god,” you mutter, brows knit in what might be pain or pleasure.

“Yeah, that’s what you’re calling me now?” The look you give him is priceless, small hands settling on his chest as you push at him weakly. “No, baby, you don’t get to do that.” Leon bottoms out, he rolls his hips forward to grind the head of his dick into your cervix, the fleshly opening moulds to his tip and you cry out. He can never tell if you’re enjoying it.

Leon sticks his fingers in your mouth to coat them in spit, you retch and he rubs figure eights on your clit, only then does your cunt loosen up its hold on him. It’s a quick process, the quicker he rubs you raw, the wetter you get, biting down on your tongue to keep quiet, but low groans slip past your cracked lips.

“Oh, there we go, baby, that’s it,” Leon coos, his cock slicked up by your wet pussy, sliding in and out with ease. His hips snap forward, forcing himself deeper into your messy little pussy, so wet you’re dripping down his balls, wetness stuck to your inner thighs.

“Fuck— I can’t, I can’t do it, ‘s too big,” you whimper, a hand slipping between your bodies to lay on your stomach. What you don’t understand is that he is big, yeah, but your pussy just needs to be broken in. Like a new pair of shoes.

“You’re doing it, baby,” Leon says, ‘cause you are doing it. You’re taking it. Body going rigid with each brutal thrust into your sopping wet hole. Whether you can take it or not isn’t for you to decide anyway. “I’m going to stuff your little pussy full,” he tells you.

“No,” you choke out, scratching at his chest, nails too blunt to do any sort of damage. Thank fuck. His girlfriend would go nuts.

It’s a satisfying victory, he covers your mouth to concentrate all his energy into this creampie, fills you to the brim, seed thick enough to stick to your insides. The original aim of his ‘experiment’ is forgotten, Leon doesn’t care if you cum or cry or pass out on his dick.

“I’m tellin’ her when she comes home.” Your threat is weak. He feared the consequences of yesterday, but you said nothing.

“You’re not telling her, you like me too much,” Leon decides, “I know you do, baby.”

“I don’t like you at all.” Your bottom lip trembles, fists balled up by your sides. The contempt only turns him on.

“No, but I think you know I’m right, don’t you?” No one else wants you, and you know that. Leon knows you know that. He’s the only one that is ever going to fuck you.

“Right about what? You’re a fucking psycho— I could get you locked up, I should get you locked up.”

“You should, so what're you waiting for?” If you did report him, Leon would just kill himself, going to prison sounds like a bore. “I think, sweetheart, that secretly, you really like it when I rape you.”

And your silence proves him right.

That report never comes. Duh. You love his dick. You like being roughed up. You know you’re deserving of it. Jesus Christ, Leon needs to call his shrink. Honestly, being around you is hard. It’s like his guilty conscience has developed a human body, shambling around the apartment in the shape of a malformed ghost girl, reminding him of the shit he’s said and done to you. You’re spinning in his necrosed brain like one of those music box ballerinas.

“Leon, be a doll and do me up,” his girlfriend is facing away from him, the smooth skin of her back and shoulders bared to him.

Leon only hears the ‘do me’ part, kissing the nape of her neck, reaching round to grab at her fat tits. “I love you…”

“I love you too, baby, but what do you think you’re doing?”

Leon makes a motion with his fingers, she sees it in the mirror.

“What is that, sign language?”

“No, I want to finger you.”

“Oh, well, that’s lovely, baby, but it’s not the time for that. I asked you to zip me up, Leon.” He zips her up while wondering how she can be so unaffected by him being so stupid.

“Hey, are you ready to go?” You knock on the door, you keep hiding your face from him today. His girlfriend said it’s ‘cause you have makeup on. Apparently that changes things. It’s sort of cute. Like, are you shy? You should be shy.

“Oh, no one likes cliffhangers, honey,” she says, forcing you to swap out some open-toe sandals for a pair of her heels. “Okay, Leon, I’ve left your dinner in the fridge, yes?”

Yes, mommy. “Yeah, babe.”

“And there’s snacks in the cupboard now, oh, and don’t use the tap water, it tastes strange so I stocked up— Leon, will you stop doing that with your jaw?”

Sorry, mommy. “Sorry, babe.”

“He’s totally fucking gurning,” you inform her in a way that screams playground snitch. He’ll choke you out for that.

“Gurning, what’s that?” His girlfriend asks cluelessly. This bitch is in her early thirties, Leon has no idea why she acts fifty. Whatever, it’s hot, he gets a girl with all the traits of an older lady without the sagging.

“Like, y’know, ‘cause he’s on meds.” What a little shit. Is this you getting back at him? Some petty fucking act of revenge? Getting his medication taken away from him by his health freak girlfriend?

“Medication? I didn’t know about this, Leon.” She looks at him like he’s killed her mother. Or raped her sister. If only she knew.

“Yeah, for my back, my back hurts, babe— Th-That’s why I’m on leave. My back hurts.” What a compelling act. Totally not a dude that’s two minutes away from injecting black tar heroin.

“Who prescribed them, a doctor or a vet?” You cock your head to the side. Fine. You fucking got him.

“Same thing.” Leon shrugs.

She makes him empty the bedside desk of pills. “Leon, good boys don’t do this. We don’t take drugs in this household, let me take them off your hands.”

“They’re- Babe, they’re not drugs, they’re for my back— I hurt my back.” Granted, his back stopped aching a few days back, he’s just taking advantage of the break. Also, he’s not a child.

“Your back, honey, I know it hurts.” She waves him off. “We can fix it, huh? I can book you in for acupuncture or cupping— Oh, what about a chiropractor?”

“Fine,” Leon says, voice cracking, watching in devastation as she takes his pills in a black garbage bag.

“Bye, Leon, see you later, honey.” She blows him a kiss and he catches it. He has to catch it.

“Yeah, bye, Leon!” You wave at him, looking happier than you have in days.

The door opens an hour later and Leon takes his hand out of his pants. You stand in front of him with red eyes and messy makeup. Leon, being the gentleman he is, takes you into his arms and rubs your back to soothe you as he tells you, more than a little cruel, I fucking told you so.

At least now you know that some guys aren’t as nice as Leon. Some men will spit in your face without considering how tight your pussy is, they won’t even think about how good your tits look in that push-up bra. See? That’s what the real world is like.

The bath fills as he bends you over the sofa. You’re prettier from behind, dress hiked up, soaked panties around your ankles. His hand smooths down the front of your stomach to cup your puffy cunt, prodding at your swollen clit. You shaved. Funny. Thought you were going to get a dick that wasn’t his.

Leon kneels, he spreads your ass cheeks to lick into your pussy from behind, tongue lapping up the beads of arousal that dribble down the seam of your cunt like sticky honey. He laps at your hole and you arch your back to push into him, his tongue fucking your pussy so well, sloppy sounds fill his ears.

“Been wanting to do this,” Leon says into your cunt, tongue making its way back up the centrefold of your fat pussy, he blows spit bubbles on your clit and then he nips at it until you cry out, startled by the jolt of pain. His dick kicks in his sweats. You taste good to make up for that face of yours.

You cream in his mouth so sweetly, toes curling against the wooden floor. Leon wipes his mouth on his forearm, then he wraps it around your neck, pulling your body flush to his. In his chest, his heart flutters when you press a delicate kiss to his bicep. He feels it and you can’t unfeel that.

“I’m sorry, Leon,” you get out through shaky moans as he sandwiches his shaft between your chubby pussy lips, bumping the tip into your clit as his hips move back and forth. “I’m sorry… Didn’t know-“

“It’s okay, baby.” He kisses behind your ear. “It’s alright ‘cause you know now, huh?”

“Yeah,” you agree tearfully, tilting your head so it rests on his broad chest, he gives your pout some wet kisses.

“Let’s get you cleaned up, hm, baby?” Leon nudges you with his nose.

Your idea of cleaning up might be far from what Leon’s is. He doesn’t think you were expecting something so extreme. But it’s for thinking you’re worth something— For thinking that anyone else would do as little as touch you. It’s to wash off that pitiful attempt at makeup.

He bends you in half over the tub. Your tits hang low enough to be squashed against the edge painfully as Leon dunks your head into lukewarm water. Holy shit. Tomorrow will be the day he overdoses. Why is he doing this?

A strangled noise passes your lips as he lets up, and you re-emerge, Leon wipes a hand over your face to rid you of the streaky mascara and sticky gloss.

“There we go, sweetheart, nice and clean.” He presses the tip into your leaking cunt, it catches on your hole, and you flail, water spilling over the edge, surface tension broken as it ripples.

Honest to god, Leon hasn’t fucked a pussy tighter than yours, and when he holds you beneath the surface? Man, you might deglove his dick. He works his cock into you, and when he’s balls deep in your sloppy cunt, Leon allows you to lift your head to which you pant and gasp and cough. All the shit a drowning person does when they’re tossed a lifesaver.

Your body sags, hanging limp with only Leon to hold you up as he roughly fucks in and out of your poor hole, heavy balls slapping against your skin.

“I love you, Leon,” you tell him, rubbing at your stinging nose with your fist, pussy tightening when he pinches your throbbing clit.

“Aw, do you, baby? You love me?” Leon laughs, the mean smile on his face hidden in your shoulder, “That’s so cute.” He rocks back and forth, shallow thrusts that are more for him than they are for you, rabbiting his dick into your squelching pussy until his balls pulse and his shaft twitches inside of you. “Real— Real fuckin’ cute,” he grits out as he buries himself to the hilt, shooting his load in your willing little pussy.

“I think so,” you whimper, thighs trembling as the knot in your stomach snaps and you coat his cock in your slick. Hey, his dick isn't a problem then.

Leon thinks about calling his shrink. The bad shit he does won’t fix itself like he wants. “Clean up,” he tells you, looking at the wet ground. The soaked rug. Your face.

“What… Leon, where are you going?” You use your palms to mop the excess water from your face. “Seriously, Leon? I just… I told you that…”

He has things to do - Leon’s going to call his shrink and very promptly throw himself over the balcony when she doesn’t answer his call.

#leon s kennedy x reader #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy angst #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy smut #leon s kennedy x you #leon s kennedy angst #leon s kennedy smut #resident evil x you #resident evil angst #resident evil x reader #resident evil smut

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ravewing · 3 months

Text

cambrian period dashboard simulator

redlichiida-realdeactivated0645589142

petition to ban anomalocarises from the local sandbar. theyre so fucking big and it's freaking everyone out and me personally ion want a trilobite muncher looming over me when im trying to have a drink.

🪲 trillybite17 Follow

they dont call them the ABNORMAL shrimp for nothing, they're fucking weird

🎸 punkrock-halluci Follow

No, you know what petition needs to be started? One to get rid of ignorant bigots like you. Have you ever SEEN an Anomalocaris ever eat, let alone ATTACK a trilobite? No, you haven't. Because they DON'T EAT TRILOBITES. Do some fucking research before you say shit like this.

⚜️ splendidmarrella Follow

fyi if you get rid of anomalocarises from public spaces then you will quite literally starve. you know those dead soft-bodied organisms yall scavenge and eat? yeah anomalocaris is the one providing those for you. as a scavenger myself i have been personally impacted by loss of food due to unfair treatment of anomalocarises that have forced them to leave the shallows that i live in and let me tell you eating detritus and nothing else is literally awful. please think twice before you post something prejudiced like this.

🩶 pleurae71 Follow

common hallucigenia + marrella W

ignore the OP, i promise most of us trilobites aren't like them- i don't even know why this is a debate. i guarantee they've never stepped outside of their little rock cave in their life

🌀 xXcorynexospikesXx Follow

LMFAOO they deactivated☠️

32,354 notes

🫧 cambripuns Follow

What do you call a Hurdiidae without any eyes? A Hurddae!

♟️vampeytoia Follow

actually you'd call it 'uncle maximilien' because my uncle maximilien was hatched with no eyes

💼 stanley-shrimp Follow

Valerie, you and I both know damn well that you do not have an "Uncle Maximilien," let alone one with no eyes. Stop lying on the internet and stop leaving your soft-bodied organism carcasses on my front sandbed. It smells putrid.

♟️ vampeytoia Follow

wow ok mr fun police. just go and piss on my parade like that

51,039 notes

👾 fiveeyedcoolguy Follow

giys i.m tripping bals rn lol. shuld not hv eaten tge 'detritus " browni e from the hallucigna.. i saw thr magic anomllcrais

🪱 pinkpikaiapage Follow

What?? Elaborate

👾 fiveeyedcoolguy Follow

He told me a prophecy

6,211 notes

🦐 apexshrimpy Follow

she cambrian on my period till i explosion

#anomalo talks #misc tag #is this hash tag funny or no?

211 notes

🎸 punkrock-halluci Follow

thinking about dying my spikes again. what color should i get?

🍢 leancho852 Follow

Do magenta to match your skateboard!!

🎸 punkrock-halluci Follow

ohh that's actually really smart thanks🙏

17 notes

🪨 shalesifters Follow

🧽 the-odontogriphus767 Follow

yo wtf. none of these fuck the landmasses. we're all in the ocean for a REASON

🦪 biofilmer08 Follow

Hey, actually, a few other molluscs and I browse on the microbial biofilm :)

♟️ vampeytoia Follow

🤓

9,761 notes

🕸️ arthropodstemz Follow

reblog if u get around by undulating ur lateral lobes

21,006 notes

📜 g-wiwaxia Follow

Did anyone else happen to see @shalesifters poll on the landmasses (followed by the reblog of the mollusc)? I think that I was simply born in the wrong generation, that I should have been able to experience the joys of being a land-dweller. I may just have grown tired of being in the ocean every day; quite frankly I just want some sort of change or reform (especially considering the incredulous prices of jellyfish nowadays...)

#Rant #I hope you guys get the idea. I expect some (likely a copious amount of, actually) hate for this one, but regardless I thought that I'd share my thoughts here #I'd like to move to Laurentia

1,732 notes

📸 daily-cambrian-pics Follow

⚜️ splendidmarrella Follow

omg thats me on the bottom in the middle! @romip51212 @kookykootenia look its us from earlier today

🫑 kookykootenia Follow

Woah whatt this is actually crazy

🍤 romip51212 Follow

yo i look rad in that.. changing my header immediately

8,121 notes

🦂 radiodont-radiostatic Follow

DNI if you support any of the anti-anomalocaris propaganda that's circling around. Sick and tired of the twisted lies that are being spread on here. I won't stand for the slandering of my brethren.

#static speaks #dni #will not hesitate to block and report any of you bigoted assholes

93 notes

🪼 jlyfsgh224256 Follow

79,343 notes

🍌 nectocarisking69420 Follow

I FUCKING LOVE DETRITUS

🍌 nectocarisking69420 Follow

Yo wtf was i on last night

🍢 leancho852 Follow

You were just speaking your truth king!!

755 notes

🪸 see-you-lagerstatte Follow

thought too long about the big white orb beyond the surface and broke down crying. What to do about this?

#why is it there?????? what is it???? #please im going insane over this

23 notes

🐾 catboycanadaspis Follow

born to say "nya!" and meow. forced to consume the coarse particles found on the sediment surface

886 notes

🌊 tidal-trilobite Follow

hey has anyone else noticed that it's been harder to breathe lately or is it just me? can't afford to go to the doctor for an exam rn

🦀 clackyappendages Follow

I thought that it was just me! I might sound crazy but have there been less archaeocyathids lately??

🐚 sand-muncher-757 Follow

i've had TWO neighbors pass away from hypoxia in the past month, definitely have noticed the breathing issues too. also i havent seen an archaeocyathid in so long either. so weird😬😬

682 notes

#cambrian period #cambrian explosion #cambrian #paleozoic #paleontology #paleoblr #dashboard simulator #anomalocaris #anomalopost #opabinia #trilobite #hallucigenia #wiwaxia #canadaspis #pikaia #possible amrev reference

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zepskies · 9 months

Note

Okay, I loved the reader smacking Ben's ass, so can we do an uno reverse of the situation, but lmao it would probably not end well because knowing Ben it probably would've been done during a terribly inappropriate time like a meeting or something, also I know that you didn't explicitly say it was BMD ben and reader but I did read it as such, lmao - salvadoreña anon (lmao it feels a little weird to call myself that because Im also desi lol)

Hello my Latina Lovely! 😘 (Wow! Love that you're also Desi. ❤️)

Aw, hell, you done uno-reversed me…

See this imagine for context: Repaying Soldier Boy for a job well done.

(And yes, I had Break Me Down-verse SB x Reader in my head writing that one as well lol. They're ingrained in me. 😂)

Word Count: 350

Imagine: Ben gets a little payback.

Your heels clacked on the tile floor brusquely as you made your way back to your office, over in Surveillance. You carried a stack of paperwork that had to be sorted through—and on Grace Mallory’s desk by end of day today.

Your hair was falling out of its loosening bun, and you tried in vain to blow a piece of it out of your face. The elevator on the opposite end of the hall dinged. The doors opened, and out came your boyfriend, strutting into the hall in his supe suit.

You smiled. “Wow, that was quick. You caught Metallo?”

“Being booked with bendy straws for arms as we speak,” Ben replied with a cocky smile. He headed toward you down the hall. “Gonna grab a bite to eat. Care to join?”

You raised a brow at bendy straws for arms. He really needed to work on how badly he roughed up these supes when bringing them into custody.

“Can’t right now,” you said, gesturing with your eyes to your workload. “But I’ll let you know when I’m ready to head home, if you want to wait for me.”

While you spoke, Ben was busy taking in your white blouse, the dark red lipstick, the pencil skirt, the sexy little heels. It was straight out of one of his fantasies…

Maybe you’d be down for a round of sexcretary after work. His lips curved at the thought.

But then, he remembered how you’d got him to accidentally shatter a nice crystal wine glass the other night, and it got him contemplating some retribution.

“All right. See you then, baby doll,” he said mildly.

When he finally reached you, he gave you a nice smack on the ass as he passed by.

You jolted with a wide-eyed yelp. Ben smirked at the sound.

He’d gotten you with a little more force than he thought though, as it made you lose your grip on your files. They flew from your hands and scattered onto the floor.

You twisted back to meet him with a glare. Ben’s hand clenched and curled back…

Then he gave you a sly grin.

“Payback’s a bitch, ain’t it?”

AN: So I don't typically post two new fics within the same day (sorry for the spam), but this one was short and essentially a sequel to the other imagine lol. (And my weird brain doesn't like a packed drafts folder. 😉)

I have at least one more SB imagine coming this week. I got a ton of requests this weekend, so thank you all! I really am so flattered. 🥰🥰

Soldier Boy Masterlist

Main Masterlist

SB Tag List:

@melancholictearz @katherineann83 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @tipthejar @ajjustice @thewritersaddictions @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @deanwanddamons @antisocialcorrupt @adoringanakin @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman

@mrshalverson2021 @iprobablyshipit91 @agalliasi @venicesem @waters-2567 @deans-spinster-witch @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @mimaria420 @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @ultrahviolentart @skyesthebomb @this-is-me19 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore

@agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesdeanvessel @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer @emily-winchester @tearsfortheyouth @solo-pitstop-vibes @romaka344 @dope-trope-105 @liuope @beautyvaliant @xxlaynaxx @ades106 @chernayawidow @beskarfilms

#ask me stuff #soldier boy #slapping dat ass #uno reverse #Soldier Boy imagine #the boys #soldier boy/ben #soldier boy x reader #soldier boy x female reader #soldier boy x you #soldier boy headcanon #zepskies answers

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pluralthey · 8 months

Note

is there a good place to start if we want to learn about idletry? im very interested in the story and all the bits and pieces revealed so far but i dont know if youve like, stated the basics both about the characters-in-story and how you’re releasing the comic

hi there. unfortunately, idletry became a passion project very abruptly and many details were added very quickly without regard for how long the project would take. once i did realize how large the project was, i decided that i would not even kid myself on the idea of holding in spoilers for the next 5 years, and those two factors combined make the information available very chaotic and slapdash -- somewhat intentionally.

i don't even have the comics tagged separately for easier access among the idletry content -- although, i could go back and give them a separate tag.

i can summarize the story and say that it's about a funny little talking honey badger/tasmanian devil named jessie gaylord who has for the last 10 years of her life been on heavy psychiatric medication in an attempt to mitigate a pervasive delusion that the world is a fictional story. she also has a notorious aggressive streak. these medications work primarily by leaving her so tired that she sleeps most of the time.

the story begins when her medical team has run out of typical medications to try, and they must order an older, more aggressive type of drug which is not commonly used anymore, and has a lengthier process to manufacturing and approving the drug. during this time, she is not on any medication, and she becomes more urgently fixated on convincing people that the delusion is true.

she ends up attempting to contact the writer, who is referred to as God, and she receives a response. she immediately attempts to write the story herself, and she's granted the ability to do anything within the story so long as she can write it out. (the intricacies and limitations of this power have been elaborated upon in a bunch of fragmentary posts, so i won't try to condense it here)

at the end of the first act, she kills the first writer and becomes the new God of her world. the rest of the story is about what she does after acquiring omnipotence, and it heavily features a character named fate -- or shiloh, as jessie calls her -- with whom she enters an intimate relationship.

she has a happy loving family composed of a father named adam, a mother named evelyn, and an older sister named emily. there is a later minor subplot about a cult following who worships her after she becomes God, and this cult is initially organized by an ant called samanthuel -- or samwich, as jessie calls them. these are usually the other characters i mention and i am too lazy to link them right now

the comic itself is currently being written. the script stands at around 51,000 words at the time of writing this as i work on the second act. after it's written, i will let it simmer for a few months and then write a second draft to start to relieve the story of its bloat. depending on its length at that point, i will either need to write a third draft, or i will start drawing the comic.

chances are, during the second draft, i will start to thumbnail or sketch scenes which receive little to no editing, as i know they will likely remain relatively unchanged even through multiple drafts.

the sketch strips are to tide me and an eager audience over in the meantime, but they've sort of dried up as i focus all of my attention on finishing the first draft and taking care of a puppy that was kind of just forced onto me.

i've made a couple of full-length comics before and they have taken years. it is, unfortunately, just the nature of the process. for idletry, i plan to self-publish the comic. i've never published something in print before, so that is the most daunting part for me.

the plan at the moment is to crowdfund this, but, to be frank with you, i no longer pay rent, and i care very much about having this comic as a printed book. i have no issue with paying the cost of printing out of my own pocket by the time it's done and am even anticipating that outcome ahead of time, despite having a pretty reliable audience by now.

i'm on the fence about releasing a digital book version, as i very much want to retain digital color versions of the pages that are more vibrant, but due to the explicit adult content of the story, i don't want it to be free-access.

tl;dr: it's about a lesbian incel with anger issues who's given omnipotence.

i'm still working on the story because i want it to be good.

i'm planning on printing it as a physical comic book once it's done.

#idletry #not art #ask #asks #as a frame of reference your average actual words-on-paper novel is 60k words

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just-some-random-blogger · 10 months

Note

Hi! How are you??

Can I request a Kylo Ren x Reader, where the reader has telekinesis (very powerful) and protects him from all the people who are after him but over use them and pass out but release a energy blast but he catches the reader in his arms and places them his bed and waits till they wake up (you can add the rest)

Thnk u :)

Stupid Kid

Kylo Ren x Reader

Summary: In which Kylo Ren is most certainly not worried about you passing out.

Word Count: >700

Warnings: gender neutral!reader, whipped!kylo, fluff, typos, etc.

A/N: hello nonnie its been a REALLY long time and im sorry. im doing well but i just cant seem to write fr ): i ended up writing after effects of yn passing out because it made sense to me. I hope you like it (: Tagging: @pinksirensong @aralezinspace @sloanexx @generalkenobee

There was an unmissable sensation that reverberated through his insides. Whatever vexation Kylo Ren felt as he battled scum rebels and struck down whirring droids and ships, mangled into dread, into fear when he felt you in that moment.

You had pushed the limit. He felt it. It pierced through his belly like a laser beam. He felt your body cave under the force of your own power. He turns and reaches out to you, keeping you up with his Force.

Whatever stood before him, between him and you, was most unfortunately placed. There was nothing left alive in the trail of where he was to where he was now, holding you in his arms.

He gathered your body, hot with sweat and blood seeping through cut and tattered clothing, and retreated. He was glad nothing tried to hinder him because he would have destroyed them with his mind for it.

And now you laid on a bed in front of him, unconscious and connected to a machine that was taking your pulse, making sure you were stable through your current state. He dropped the towel he used to clean you up in a bowl and took a look at his work. He fixed the new shirt he put on you and tucked you in.

Kylo leaned on the chair, positioned right by your side, and watched you breathe. He crossed his arms and tilted his head. He watched as his Force moved the blanket on your form more snugly.

"Stupid kid," he mutters, "I told you not to do this to yourself."

Kylo does not garner a response.

He does nothing but look at you and watch you breathe while waiting for you to wake. When a nurse comes to check up on you, he watches closely as she checks your vitals and scribbles something in her clipboard.

The nurse turns to him and offers a smile, "the patient is stable. You don't have to worry. Everything is fine."

"I'm not worried," Kylo retorts, turning from her to you, "I know."

The nurse takes a moment to respond, "if you like, I can have someone come and watc-"

"No," Kylo turns to her, "no one else," he tilts his head to the door, "you may leave. I will be staying."

The nurse takes in his rigid form and purses her lips. She nods in regard and walks out of the room.

Kylo slumps in his chair.

He dozes off. It lasts only a little while. Before you can even move, Kylo senses it and wakes, eyelids riping open, posture straightening out.

You groan as you shuffle in your spot, eyes fluttering open.

Kylo drags his chair forward and peers down at you, "you fainted."

"Ergh- what?"

"I told you not to use your stupid powers like that."

You look at Kylo, confused by the sudden warmth on your cheek. He lifts your head and fluffs your pillow. He gently brings your head back down. "You're not even a strong telekinetic," he fibs, "I could have handled it myself."

Your eyes focus on Kylo's face. You see that he is mangy and evidently tired. You raise your hand and use your powers to bring his face close to touch, but he senses it and repels. He grabs your hand and shakes his head, "don't."

"You sh-"

"You shouldn't be doing anything that can further strain you," he says, leaning towards you, eyeing you seriously. Your stomach rolls when he places your palm on his cheek, knowing it was your intention. He senses your response to it. He clears his throat, "once you're better, you'll working overtime to practice your abilities."

He tenses when your thumb rubs his skin.

You mutter, "I thought I shouldn't be doing anything that can further strain me."

He takes a moment to respond, "you'll be better by then."

"Hmm," you counter, "will I?"

Kylo's brows furrow slightly. He furrows them completely, "why wouldn't you be?"

You stare at him for a second. Your lips curve into a smile. You chuckle softly, bringing your hand to his brows, rubbing the line between them, "I was teasing. Don't worry-"

"I'm not worried," he says before you even finish.

You pull your hand back and bury it in the covers. Kylo straightens up and watches as you do this. His eyes dart back to your face when you chuckle, "of course you're not."

330 notes · View notes

enduringmoth · 6 months

Text

thoughts on marvin's abuse, care's existence and paul's transness

taking a break from my usual bg3 posting to talk a little bit about my newer hyperfixation through the lens of queer allegory

necessary author's note: i am an afab transmasculine nonbinary person. obviously, while i do believe my transness does lend my opinion authenticity, at the same time, being trans myself does not mean i can't be transphobic -- so if any of the contents of this post set off alarm bells, please tell me.

trigger & content warnings: child abuse, kidnapping, torture, general petscop badness. obvious spoilers for petscop in its entirety, as well as references to the recent youtube deepdive by nexpo.

TL;DR -- perpetuating the idea that someone can force someone else to be a different gender than they are is harmful to trans people. however, all things involve considerable nuance. to pretend that marvin's actions could not have influenced paul's sense of self in the slightest discredits paul's lived experiences, and i believe a more trauma-informed dialogue about paul could be worth exploring as a community.

my preferred theory explaining petscop is that marvin tried to make care more like lina through abuse and "failed". after this, care would eventually end up in lina's home, and transition to paul.

(simply to make all of this less confusing, i'm going to call paul pretransition "care", though i will avoid pronouns. this is not me trying to invalidate paul, it's just so i don't have to keep saying "paul before he transitioned" or similar phrases.)

it is not a result of marvin's "failure" that care transitioned to paul. but i do believe there is a link between paul's perceptions of self and the trauma he endured pretransition -- and discussing these things gives us a deeper understanding of paul and his history.

obviously there is no "canon" answer to petscop. but im seeing this theory discussed a lot within the tags, and i personally agree with it -- i just feel some of those who are saying we cannot consider marvin's actions are not necessarily accurate, either.

what i am positing is that while marvin certainly did not make paul trans and i would never claim that he did, we understand that marvin's abuse of care -- his cruelty towards care, his warping of care's perception of appearance and self-worth -- is certainly a factor in how paul must see himself.

marvin's treatment of care was poor enough that paul struggles to recall that time of his life. he thinks they are different people -- and in a way, they certainly are (and i've seen DID theories for them which i also enjoy because of this) -- and has clearly repressed what it meant to be marvin's child.

marvin locked care in a basement for six months. that is no small amount of time, and it likely had no small amount of affect on paul. we can assume based on the implications of some school scenes that marvin was trying to convince care to be more like lina during this time. care escaped, and returned home -- though eventually, we know from belle's dialogue that paul would find his way to lina.

"do you remember the day you were born?"

paul's "birth" occurred after marvin's abuse, and though it was not a result of it, there is something almost poetic about following the thread of paul's life from care to his authentic self that plays as a foil to the heinous rebirthing practiced by marvin and rainer.

contrasted with what happened to belle (and seemingly others), paul chose (a form of) rebirth -- transition. marvin tried to make lina be reborn through care. instead, care resisted -- and he would eventually become paul, and that strikes me as so narratively compelling. it's not to spite marvin and please don't think i'm saying that, as care was naturally always paul -- it is simply self-discovery at its most raw and beautiful, and i love it.

the above is why i love petscop as a queer allegory. taking ownership of one's future and selfhood, even when others are trying to tell you who to be.

and that's why i think saying marvin made his afab child transition in rejection of martin's quest for lina -- or that marvin tried to make his amab child transition to care/lina, as nexpo posited -- is so wrong, and harmful.

yet, paul's trauma is real. it happened. and it's a part of him that should be able to be discussed for what it is.

as someone with extensive trauma history, i can tell you that my gender expression and personal identity are in some way connected to pieces of trauma, because those pieces are part of me. i am not trans because of my trauma, but my gender and my trauma are parts of me at the same time -- i am not each of my pieces, but a sum of my whole.

the point i'm trying to make here is that while i think nexpo genuinely missed the mark here with this whole "care never existed, marvin tried to make paul a girl" thing, i do think there needs to be room for a trauma-informed discussion around paul.

i hope that all made sense. if any of this is harmful/transphobic, please let me know. i genuinely love this game and i think it's so fascinating to discuss. /gen

#petscop #paul leskowitz #carrie mark #petscop paul #petscop care #paul is trans theory

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mirrorballhughes · 6 months

Text

I MISS YOU IM SORRY

luke hughes x adelaide hunter

starting us off with a good old instagram edit, some text messages and a lil in real life !! so enjoy :)

adelaidehunter

liked by stormallen, jackhughes, _quinnhughes and 115,130 others

adelaidehunter AHHH. words can not express how excited i am to say MY DEBUT ALBUM “good riddance” is out june 21st!!! ALSO “where do we go now?” is out TONIGHT AT MIDNIGHT!!

its difficult to imagine these songs living anywhere other than my most secret places, but rutger is my biggest supporter and reminded me that holding space for brutal honesty in songwriting is kind of the whole point.

i feel an unbelievable amount of gratitude for the opportunity to have made this album. writing this record allowed me to grow up in ways i needed to. it forced me to reflect and be accountable. it allowed me to walk away from versions of myself that i no longer recognize. it allowed me to let go.

also a big shoutout to my sister thats not blood, storm. shes one of the few people in this world capable of making others feel safe to their core when they are exploring the parts of themselves that are most raw. storm is rare and generous. im so glad you are my roommate, but fuck the canes btw!! ;)

thank you all for the support!!! im so nervous. im so relieved. i hope with my whole heart that theres something in here that makes you feel less alone. ill be thanking you all for the rest of my life for taking this record and making it yours!!! JUNE TWENTY FIRST!! AHHH see you at midnight!! <3

tagged: stormallen, rutgermcgroarty

COMMENTS

_quinnhughes Della!! I’m so proud of you! Cant waif to celebrate with you :)

adelaidehunter QUNNIIE!! thank you. see u soon

jackhughes Adds so proud of you.

adelaidehunter thx jacks. see u soon :)

user2 this album is gonna be so good.

user5 anyone think its gonna be about luke…

user6 u might be on to something..

user10 but his brothers commented??

user13 they are family friends, grew up together.

User30 Oh ik that tension in their summer lake house is gonna go CRAZY.

rutgermcgroarty STAR IS SHINNING !!

adelaidehunter thx!

stormallen MY GIRL!! I CANF WAIT TO LISTEN ( already have)

rutgermcgroarty yeah me too u arent special!

edwards.73 HEY I HEARD IT ASWELL!!

umichhockey i think we all heard it🙄

adelaidehunter I LOVE U STORMY!!

mackie.samo are we ignoring the fact that adel went out of her way to reply using the umich account?

luca.fantilli its lemonade she can do what she wants!

adamfantilli mackie dont be a hater now, ur just mad that u missed the listening party!!

umichhockey thx you fantilli twins!! :)

luca.fantilli we arent twins lemonade

adamfantilli last time i stick up for you.

adelaidehunter NOOO IM SORRY🙁💔

dylanduke25 good riddance: said to express relief at being free of a troublesome or unwanted person or thing.

user5 DYLAN???

adelaidehunter LMAOOO. duker thats crazy

seamuscasey26 DUDE THATS FOUL.

markestapa addieeeee LETS GO?? Im screaming at u

adelaidehunter IM NOT even WITH U??

markestapa okay.. u might be

user1303 WHAT.

lhughes_06 cant wait to listen. proud of you adelaide.

user3343 THE “ADELAIDE” HURT ME.

user559 shes definitely not replying to this!

caleb.hunter um im ur biggest supporter???

adelaidehunter thats true! i love u

user34 IM GGIGLING AHE TOTALLY SKIPPED OVER LUJES COMMENT.

user32 UR SO RIGHT OH MY GOD SHE DEFINITELY SAW IT

hughes hunter moment !!

quinn: caleb just got here. now where are u della??

jack: YEAAAH. where are u missy???

quinn: jack. we arent playing bad cop good cop.

jack: i know that??

quinn: god ur annoying

adelaide: im pulling in right now.

enough fighting please.

IN REAL LIFE!!

adelaide just parked her car, grabbing her bags from her car. she took in her surroundings, taking a deep breath in and out. the hughes hunter lake house was always her favorite place to be. something about this time seems different. the blonde let go of the negative energy before walking to the door. she opened the door, backing up feeling the door handle opening up from the inside.

“oh. hey adelaide. thought u were the pizza guy.” the youngest hughes brother was standing at the door, causing adelaide to go mute. “QUINN MOVE! IM TRYING TO GET TO THE DOOR. CALEB STOP HIM!” she heard the middle hughes brother say. “here do you want me to help you-“ the curly haired boy asked, “no its fine thanks.” the blonde spoke quietly walking into the house carrying her stuff in. “ADDS!! move LUKE!” jack said causing luke to move out of his way, the youngest brother was stood there admiring the girl.

luke checked up on adelaide a lot. always watching her stories, seeing her posts just never reached out. luke noticed how her hair still had little bits of brown in it from when she dyed her hair right after the two broke up. luke watched the two interact hugging each other and smiling. luke wished that was him. “shes my sister, why didnt i get the first hug?” caleb spoke as him and quinn finally moved over to where the group was. “she likes me more thats why cal.” jack said causing adelaide to roll her eyes, giving her brother a hug then hugged quinn. her and luke locked eyes, the three guys standing there noticed the love spark that were still there between the two.

the blonde girl broke the eye contact, “ill be back down. i gotta get unpacked.” she said shooting a small smile to the group of guys who nodded. there was a knock at the door, “great timing! the pizza here as well!” quinn smiled pushing luke to get the door as he was impatiently waiting for it. addie made her way upstairs smiling trying to make this lake house vacation will as best as she could.

caleb was at her door, seeing as though she finished packing. “you okay?” that caught adelaides attention, “im fine why wouldnt i be?” she said sitting down on her bed caleb following after her. “um i dont know, maybe its because of some certain boy downstairs? who you have been friends with since forever and then ended up to-“ “okay enough!” she said causing her older brother to laugh. “okay fine sorry! but if you ever wanna talk just let me know. im here for you, a.” the glasses wearing boy said, as the two hugged each other.

the hunter siblings went downstairs sitting at the bar with the hughes brothers already digging into the pizza. “so della how excited are you for your album and song release?” the oldest hughes brother asked, causing luke to feel smaller and tense. he was there when adelaide was writing the music, she told him about some of the songs. but once they brought up, luke knew she had to have some gut wrenching song written about him. sure he was nervous, but he would always be proud of her for any and all of her accomplishments.

“oh! im so excited, but nervous. it does feel good to have it released out to the world instead of being stuck inside with just me.” she said looking over at luke whos head was low, then brought her attention to grabbing some pizza. “so “where do we go now?”whats that gonna be about?” jack asked knowing most of her songs had meaning, jack always adored adds music he has to be her biggest supporter. “its basically me reflecting back on all the little white lies in a one-sided love that beamed as bright red flags, finally leading to ending things. and the question of where they should go, start afresh or not, looms over this delicate ballad, though remains unanswered.” she said causing luke to look up and then quickly brought his head down. “oh well i cant wait to hear it! any songs about our good man luke here?” jack asked causing luke to look up and glare at the older boy. adelaids face flushed, “you dont need to answer that a. jack is just picking.” caleb said sending the boy a wtf look.

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dsaf-confessions · 2 months

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yeah, im sorry this is so long. its not meant against you, mod, respect ya for all that you have to put up with here... yeah.

i think a lot of the people coming on here to complain about other peoples opinions need to take a deep breath. you don't have to agree with them. but bashing people in the tags, anonymously sending in that someone's opinion on a fucking rpg maker game that, at its core, is a massive shitpost.

suicide jokes, especially when you dont know the person saying it at all, are not funny. if it isnt a joke and youre really about to kill yourself over a fun little tumblr blog, get help. seriously. i hope you get better and feel okay one day.

somebody who probably lives 12 to 24 hours away from you, by plane, saying they self-ship or ship an oc with a character you find irredeemable is not the end of the fucking world. sure, you may see it as weird, but at the end of the day a surprising amount of this fandom is around about 13, and thats what 13 year olds do. no shade to yall. those of you that i know are great.

i myself am a minor, i only got into the games, and months later, the fandom around my 15th birthday. its easier than some of you want to admit to stay away from the parts of the fandom that arent child appropriate. i dont mean the drugs. drugs arent anyone-appropriate. theyre fucking illegal. shoving an eggplant up someones urethra is also totally outlandish and sounds like it was written by a 5th grader

lets all respect each other for a bit. nobody fucking deserved to get the colossal amounts of anon hate that ive seen soley because of a harmless opinion.

to the adults here who churn out high-quality comics and fics and ask blogs, that i so joyously read, hell yeah! keep doing that, do what you want with it.

to the children, and by that i mean minors okay we are in fact legally considered children, you keep it up too. keep up your ask blogs and fics and fanart and shit that is sometimes so high-quality i assume youre fucking 30 until i check your bio.

yall, collectively, need to learn that at the end of the day people are gonna do what they want with these characters. it doesnt matter if someone draws henry miller in fucking cat ears because hes a fictional guy. have you seen what they do to steve raglan out there, man? its a fucking warzone but instead of explosives everyones firing out furry edits! it doesnt matter if someone ships something you dont like. im not a proshipper, theres lines i personally refuse to cross, but can i do anything about the people who do? no. ive come to terms with that.

ship your weird rarepair who never met in canon. draw your genderswap fanart. make your au askblog. write that fic you think wont be good enough. someone, somewhere, probably loves what youre creating.

the anons here saying shit like "oh im gonna kms over this" and "thats a fucking weird character to like", yall are the same. im sure you arent all vanilla ice-cream on a summers day level basic. youve got your unusual headcanons too.

we really have to let the minors in this fandom be. they arent going anywhere, myself included, because they dont want to. you cant force people out. so be fucking nice instead of making someone feel ashamed because they make jake a she/they or whatever.

holy fuckin shit that is. long. i am so sorry mod. if its too long you dont have to post it lmao

#SPEAK UR TRUTH #dsaf confessions #dsaf #dayshift at freddy's

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caseythebunnyboy · 1 year

Text

! MINORS, HOMO/TRANSPHOBES, TERFS/RADFEM, PRO-ANA, DETRANS/MISGENDER KINK, STRAIGHT MEN, STRAIGHT WOMEN & LESBIAN ONLY BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT !

!! WARNING !! this blog will contain hardcore kinks. please don't scroll through my blog if you are sensitive to these things, prioritize yourself.

hello, my name is casey! iam an 18 y/o, 5'4, south-east asian trans boy (he/him exclusively) that is going to be running this tumblr blog! im a bottom switch, which means that i prefer to be the one getting penetrated, but i can be both dom and/or sub while doing so.

taken emoji anons: 🗝️ || 🚂 || 🧸 || 🍅 || 👁️ || 🐺 || 🐦 || 🏹 || 🥀 || 🍡 || 🎸 || 👑🖤 ||

what i will be posting: mainly kinky text posts, nsfw art of myself, and sometimes ill show off my body in a nice outfit when im feeling more confident!

rules & info:

if you cross my boundaries 3 times, i will block you, no exceptions. depending on the severity of the crossing, i might block you instantly with no second chances.

if your blog makes me uncomfortable or i get a bad feeling from it, im blocking you.

sexting and roleplaying with me in my dms is allowed, but i will not send photos to you in dms! i dont feel comfortable doing that. so only strictly texting! i am fine with people sending me videos and photos though, but it depends on what you'll send me.

atleast say hi before chatting me, had someone say "worthless cunt" as their first dm and i blocked them lmao, its not hot to me. greeting me first would be nice.

if you are going to sext and/or rp with me, please keep my kink and no-no lists in mind, i have boundaries too.

only those that arent women and arent exclusively attracted to only women are allowed to sext with me. sorry to the women out there who wanted to, but im not attracted to you... but im sure you're still very pretty, and theres many other people who'd want to chat with you!

what to call my genitals: cock, dick, boy cunt, cunt, cunny, boypussy, bunny pussy, wet hole, front hole, little/small/tight hole, needy hole, bunny hole! (please dont call it a vagina, clit or just "pussy" by itself. only calling it a "pussy" without my preferred additions is something i can excuse sometimes, but i dont like it. vagina and clit will get u straight up blocked.)

what to call my chest area: chest. thats it. if you call it tits, boobs, or anything like that i will block you. even if you say "boy tits" or "man boobs" you are still getting blocked. its either you only refer to it as a chest or you never refer to it at all.

inbox and asks are always open! please send me threats of what you'll do to me if you find me, what you want to do to me, and if you got off to anything i post 💜

my kinks: cnc, somno, teacher/student, power imbalance/dynamic, roleplaying, voice kink, degrading and/or praising me, dry humping/grinding, humiliation, free use, gangbang, overstim, edging, orgasm control/denial, impact play, begging, namecalling, pet play, watersports, monsterfucking, tentacles, breeding (no preg, makes me dysphoric), creampie (also no preg, same reason), cum dump, bondage, shibari, being punished, manhandling, size kink, treating me like your toy, making me into a sex slave, being protective/possessive, dumbification, claiming, jealous/angry sex, rough sex, and teasing. (theres prob alot more but theres so many that i forget lol)

kinks that are hard no's: feet, knife/gunplay, feeder/feedee, ed, choking, scat, vomit, age play, misgendering kink, detrans kink, calling me any term mainly used for women (good girl, queen, princess, babygirl, using she/her for me), drug play, bioessentialism, pregnancy, forced feminization, and gore.

things i like being called: baby boy, bunny boy, little bunny, little boy, cunt boy, bunny, bun bun

tags: #casey ★ grumbling for little (often nsfw) text posts/rambles/thoughts that i dont think are interesting enough to be in other tags, #casey ★ mumbling for text posts, #casey ★ answering for ask posts, #casey ★ doodling for drawings, #casey ★ peeking for body pictures, #casey ★ speaking for important announcements/posts, and #casey ★ sharing for reblogs!

also! this is all a fantasy, i do not actually want this to happen to me. consent and safety is very important in kink, sex and bdsm. i do not condone these actions being done unconsensually.

thats all! i hope my blog can make your dicks throb 💜

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lustale · 8 months

Text

Hello everyone! Thank you all for almost 50 followers!! :3c All activity has been on my main account @morguemaw, so if you want more direct content of Lusttale shoot me a ask about it!!!!

So, abit has changed over the few months and i have a update, coupled with info for all you new guys who found this blog!

1) AU is decided to be 16+. Its suggestive, no NSFW will be posted/shown as i want whatever content i MYSELF to post to be accessible to everyone within a comfortable range! There will be light sexual jokes, however if at any point it reaches too much, please tell me! I know the AU itself should obviously be considered a Explicit Rated AU, however i know there are people who enjoy the AU without the sexual aspects.

2) This AU is not a fan AU OR variant: This AU was made with the plan to 100% rewrite Underlust, i will explain below!!

Why the rewrite?:

I've loved Underlust since i joined the Undertale community, and others have too! However, the owner WAS involved and DID create content involving fontcest, a nazi Chara, Frans content, and was friends/mutuals with others who also created gross content like BlogTheGreatRogue and Lizherubones. This disgusted me and made alot of others feel the same. The AU was left off on a confusing as shit note, from the disgusting writing of Lust MTT to the messed up relationship between the brothers. I want to erase this the best i can. Alot of characters have also 0 content (Such as Lust Alphys) and although i will mostly focus on Sans/Papyrus/Frisk still, i WILL be creating content for mostly every character to again ensure the AU is fully fleshed out for as much enjoyment as possible.

Wheres the creator/owner?:

Awhile back, the owner, NSFWshamecave/Niel, left the internet and the AU for personal and mental reasons and bounced between owning and not owning the Au. They have since been MIA(Missing In Action) from the internet and AU, i doubt they will return or be involved at this point. The AU is considered fandom owned, which if you prefer that i support it, but do not interact with my blog as im basing everything on a rewritten POV with the entire intent to overhaul the AU without being too different or too similar.

What about the Underlust domain name?:

Lusttale CAN be called Underlust, BUT i prefer Lusttale to separate it as its alot easier, HOWEVER i have no issue with it being called Underlust! (Just still please credit/tag me, id love to see any content!)

What about fan AUs or others who make their own Variants?:

Keep going! I support these ten fold. Ive seen so many creative AUs overall, including a recent aroace one that has such adorable designs and is why i want to refresh myself and explain this blog to anyone new who might mistake me as a fan account. If you want to consider your variant a version/variant of my Rewritten AU, please tag me! Id love to see your AUs, your Varaints, EVERYTHING!!

HOWEVER. I do NOT support a single soul who ever uses my AU for Frans, Fontcest, or akin. Dont tag me OR interact with me, its public knowledge how the community feels about those, and im one of the many who don't like that content and wish for my AU to not be used in it. Self inserts, OC/Y/N x Lusttale, or etc is the same, id love to see it!!

What about Swaplust/Lustfell/AUs?:

Swaplust is also inactive: I have had my own interpretation of Swaplust since i found the AU when it was first made, Lustfell however i dont know, if its requested i will create something but i dont want to just claim every Lust AU out there. Not saying im claiming ownership of Swaplust, im saying that the Swaplust i want to make will be considered canon AU and it will be the ONLY Underlust AU i will ever claim, Swaplust has the same exact permissions. (Swaplust too had a very close Frans suggested ship, that is my reason for it)

To clarify if needed, im not forcing the view of me owning the AU onto every Underlust created content, im just saying if you yourself, the community, support what i do, i will continue, hence why i say tag me! I love to see it!

What about headcanons/outdated info like Sans being shorter?:

RN, Sans is the same size as Gaster Sans (i think 5' something?) however im fine with people drawing him short! ^^

Head-canons are also fully fine!!! Tell me any you think of, id love to hear. As long as you respect that i have my own plans, id be overjoyed to read whatever you guys think of or have.

So, to sum it up, Underlust has had a MIA owner since 2019/2020. Because of the history, and the way its loved, its a massive honor if i could step up and help give the community a AU with a solid backstory, solid characters with fleshed out personalities, and a structured plot that will replace something that was/is beloved. The best i can explain it, is my goal is to structure the AU but still keep support for the community as the AU was indeed considered Fandom Owned, again, you do not have to support me wanting to claim it, just do not bash me for it, as im absolutely not considering Lusttale a variant or AU, im considering Lusttale canon.

Questions are welcomed, if you have any concerns i can also explain! (Anon/Off Anon preferred so i can have it be public accessible incase others have the same questions)

#lustale #lusttale #underlust

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haejjoon · 1 year

Note

I just finished Royal and I've been really enjoying the swap au, and your take on the characters!

You said you had lots of thoughts about Yusuke too? 👀

WE REALLY ARE TAKING TURNS WITH CHARACTER ANALYSIS i should just make it a tag at this point. ykw im gonna do that.

okay, onto yusuke:

I adore him. completely and utterly. he’s my favorite boy apart from akeshu and for WILDLY obvious reasons: he’s fun, SUCH a character, and his story arc feels whimsy but not so out there that it feels unrealistic. adding onto the fact that i’m an artist myself, gunning to go pro, and he’s so relatable it hurts. straps yusuke onto the operating table let’s do this

1) his struggles relating to madarame

one thing that i’ll say right off the bat is that i HATE how the pts approached him. its nonsensical. even if ryuji and ann aren’t the sharpest tools in the shed how the hell did they think that approaching a stranger and saying “YOU’RE BEING ABUSED WE CAN HELP YOU FIGHT YOUR ABUSER” was going to turn out well in any way possible?? the writing suffers from something similar during ryuji’s run with akiren to question the volleyball team members. ryuji and ann, as dull as they may be, are abuse victims themselves; surely they’d understand why abuse victims would be hesitant to say anything? especially when a stranger gets all up in your face about it.

but apart from that: i love how yusuke dealt with all of it. i’m not saying that him becoming defensive over madarame was a good thing, but in terms of realism, it just Makes Sense. children raised by abusive guardians often aren’t aware how they’re taken advantage of, and when they’re as isolated from society as yusuke is, their obvious first instinct is to defend those who raised them. it’s like rapunzel about mother gothel from disney’s tangled. of course yusuke defended madarame’s ‘love’; he never knew what love was.

it isn’t even only that. yusuke and madarame are both branded as very traditionally japanese, from how they speak to how they dress. it’s even shown in their primary art medium—traditional painting and japanese oil work. i’m not japanese, but i am korean, and if there’s anything i’ve learned while growing up in a traditional asian household: it’s very suffocating. the filial piety you learn from high school history class isn’t just a far-off tradition in the old ages, it’s EXTREMELY prevalent even today. i can’t even count the amount of times i was put down or chastised for simply speaking out of turn, and that was with my parents trying to adapt to the american standards of respect.

in this context, it makes even more sense for yusuke to defend madarame so vehemently. it’s literally been ingrained into him growing up. the entire “parents are right, children are wrong” mentality is SO strong with the Growing Up Asian experience, and that’s coming from a korean-american. i can’t even imagine the kind of shit yusuke’s had to go through.

and it’s with all that that i find it so cathartic and admirable that yusuke finally managed to recognize madarame for the shitbag he is. genuinely, the amount of brainwashing he’d been forced through should have made it impossible for him to fight back, but my boy did it—and in the most stylish way possible, might i add!!! he stuck it to madarame and finally recognized his own worth. that’s incredible. i’m so proud of him.

but what makes all that even BETTER is his CONFIDANT STORY, and OH MY GOD I’M NEVER SHUTTING UP ABOUT HOW AMAZING IT IS MOVING ON TO POINT TWO

2. HIS CONFIDANT STORY OHHHH MY GOD

one of the biggest opinions ive heard about yusuke’s confidant story is that it doesn’t make sense or that it’s in his own head. SLAMS ATTORNEY DESK. OBJECTION YOUR HONOR ITS TIME FOR THE CROSS EXAMINATION

of COURSE it’s all in his own head. his confidant begins after madarame’s arrested and he finally, finally gets to be his own person and live on his own. the physical threat is gone!! but one of the most amazing things about his story arc is the depiction that childhood trauma never truly goes away. madarame being gone for good doesn’t automatically mean that yusuke’s mentally safe and sound. in fact, it fucks with him even more that he’s free—he doesn’t know how to live on his own, or how to make art for himself.

he’s literally lived his entire life for someone else; how can you expect him to suddenly go out and do whatever he wants? until this point in time, yusuke’s wants didn’t matter. he didn’t matter. the only important thing to him was pumping out art for madarame to display at his next show JUST TO SURVIVE. to EAT. i’m gonna get into his whole thing with eating in a second but i’m just putting that out there: it’s all in his own head because it has to be. he has to grow mentally in order for him to to do anything.

with that point out of the way: yusuke doesn’t forgive madarame for what he’s done, especially with his mother, but he also just has no idea what to feel about him in general? there’s two clashing images: one, of the teacher who (in yusuke’s view) loved and raised him, and one, of the monster who let his mother die in cold blood to get his hands on her personal artwork. and you might say “oh well yusuke’s being delusional again because madarame never truly loved him.” no. it isn’t delusion. it’s how yusuke’s been raised. he didn’t recognize madarame’s abuse because he never registered it as abuse. he was never taught that it was abuse. unlike shiho and ann who knew that what kamoshida was doing was wrong, yusuke never had anyone to tell him that madarame was taking advantage of him.

yusuke didn’t have anyone.

throughout his confidant story, he agonizes over his purpose for creating art at all—it makes sense, as his only purpose thus far was to put food on the table and to avoid verbal abuse from his father figure. yes, he said that his only purpose for creating art in the past was because he wished to put beauty in the world like his mother did with sayuri, but is that really all there was to it? i don’t think so. yusuke created art to survive, and coped with it by staring at his “sensei”’s magnum opus and telling himself that he was creating things for the sake of creation, not to give in to his survivalist instinct. it was a coping mechanism. i’ll live and die by this.

and this is also why he crumbles so much over that art director coming to him to monetize his work. he’s now aware that what he was striving for in the past was fake. he wants to truly pursue that goal again, to create something beautiful just for the sake of creating, but now he’s been thrust into the real world—one of capitalism, one where corruption thrives. the pure art he wants to make just doesn’t exist here. it never did. and that realization destroys him.

now if you Didn’t Know, i’m also an artist. i’m literally the same age as yusuke is (if not a little older), and that truth hurts. the fact that i have to make art in order to feed and clothe and keep myself warm hurts. there’s nothing i’d like better than to just make things i want to make, but i can’t, not in this world. his struggle is so realistic, and it rings so deep. every time i experience his story it always leaves me feeling bittersweet.

but then!!! at the end of his story!!!! he comes to a very important realization.

all of that’s okay.

it’s okay to profit off of your work. it’s okay to make things other people like. it doesn’t make you any less of a person to seek compensation for your work. it’s doesn’t make you any less of a human to seek praise for the amazing things you create. it’s okay.

and to the non-artists out there who might not understand why this is such a groundbreaking revelation: artists are constantly being put down in this capitalistic society. art is literally everywhere you look—it’s in the buildings you occupy, in the subways you ride, in the words you read, in the shows you consume. art is one of the cornerstones for what makes humans human, and those who create such beautiful things are never given credit.

just look at the ai discourse happening recently. look at how artists are treated when they stress about having art stolen or watermarks erased. to people like us, our creations are proof of us being alive. it’s our living mark on the world, one that will remain (physically or digitally) long after we ourselves pass away. but we’re constantly, constantly told that “it’s not that deep”, “you’re being selfish”, yadda yadda yadda. we’re shit on simply because we want to survive in this hellish fucking world. and that builds up.

so many aspiring artists out there give up too soon because of this. because art isn’t profitable, because we have to survive, because no one appreciates what you do no matter how beautiful it is or how much work you put in.

but then, persona 5 finally turned around, and told an entire generation of aspiring artists that their work was important. you are important. it’s okay to profit off of what you do.

that’s fucking incredible. it’s also a really, REALLY low bar, but it’s something. yusuke coming to the realization that creating art for himself is okay, whether it be for monetization or praise, was so cathartic to me. i’m sure other artists feel the same way.

his story arc is a fucking fantastic depiction of how much artists suffer, no matter what medium or era.

…….. and then people turn around and shit on it because they don’t understand its intricacies. as expected.

sigh.

3. the theme of going hungry

throughout the entirety of the game, yusuke’s depicted as the quintessential ‘starving artist’. he’s always hungry, and never knows how to budget his money, and that shit’s hilarious but also really, really fucking sad.

i remember reading a fantastic yusuke study on ao3 a couple years back—forgot who the author was, but it’s called “the emperor”—and it said something along the lines of this: “you have to eat in order to starve.”

like.

oh my GOD.

and it plays in so terrifically with the experience of creating art, as well. you have to eat in order to starve; you have to taste in order to crave. you have to experience praise in order to want it more. i’ve gone through dry spells where no one saw what i made, and it only made me go hungry for that appreciation again—and then i get it, just a little taste of it. i keep making content. i keep on going and going and going just to get the smallest bit of acknowledgement.

for those who’ve ever gone hungry before: would you be able to turn down a feast, if offered? would you be able to pace yourself, or would you inhale it quick as you can? if you’ve ever eaten a large meal after being hungry for a day or two, you’d know that it would immediately come back to bite you in the ass. you’d stop eating for a bit, you’d get hungry again, and then you’d scarf down another gigantic meal, rinse and repeat.

the correct choice here is to moderate yourself. take it slow. eat enough to be full, and pace yourself so that you won’t have to go horribly hungry to eat again.

yusuke, starved for appreciation, suddenly finds himself with the offer of his life. he’ll be sponsored by one of the most influential art directors in all of japan. he’ll be successful; he’ll have a scholarship, he’ll never, ever have to go hungry again—

and then he turns it down.

because this entire time, the hunger allegory was about success. you get the opportunity of a lifetime, and you invest everything you have into it—you eat and you eat and you eat until you can’t anymore, and then you find that that the satisfaction of finally feeling full has long since gone, and now you’re hungry again. you’re still a nobody. no one remembers your one-off success.

yusuke refuses the incredible offer, and decides to build his success slowly. he won’t take it all in stride. he’ll pace himself until he doesn’t have to be starving to eat.

that’s FUCKING brilliant.

i have so much more to say about yusuke than just this—how i feel about him (being, in my opinion, incredibly autistic-coded) as an artist with adhd, how his behavior is treated by the phantom thieves, how he plays into the phantom thieves as the sole creative mind of the group—but if i get into all that i’ll literally be typing on my ipad forever. i’ve already been sitting here for thirty minutes instead of finishing up chapter 5 of ex machina. oh god i love yusuke so much.

if you somehow came across this gigantic character dissection on your tl, hey hello hi, i also write stories! currently working on a swap au in my spare time, you might’ve heard of it. ex machina by hhaeyeun on ao3. check it out <3

thanks for the opportunity anon i’m So Sorry to have filled your inbox with this absolute beefcake of a reply. have a lovely day <3

#yusuke kitagawa #character study #persona 5 royal #p5r

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