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angldelight · 3 months

Text

i know its for the better.

oscar x merc!fem!reader. | max x fem!reader.

summary. controversy sparks your name after you make a cruel comment about another driver — who made a sexist comment — and you know your career is in danger. your beloved was supposed to fight for you. supposed to, anyway.

warnings. happy ending KINDA?. so much angst, why do I do this. depression. unnamed driver is sexist. breakups. kissing. fighting, swearing. suicide as symbolism, misogyny. reader is mean im sorry

loving oscar was like putting a gun between my lips and praying the chamber was empty when I pulled the trigger.

his mouth is cold and his kisses are hollow against my skin, my heart no longer fond as I push him away.

a driver had called me a waste of time, claiming that I was no good for the sport because I was a woman — the video leaked and oscar did nothing.

nothing. no comment of anger. nothing at all.

watching my rival — max verstappen — come to my defence instead of the man who laid between my legs most nights was like having a full chamber and a suicidal urge.

it tipped me over the edge when he brushed off being asked by someone about the comment, he claimed it was none of his business.

my break up text was cold, cruel and mean. ‘don’t ever fucking contact me again.’

max’s mouth is hot on my skin and I have to resist the urge to moan. three long cold weeks of silence from the man I had loved and I turned to abusing max’s love.

a man devoted to devotion — my hand stills in his hair when his mouth goes down my stomach — and a man who is known to be no more than cruel on the track, is somehow sweet.

I know, sweet, is such a silly word but there is no other way for me to describe.

max’s interview plays over and over in my head, he calls the driver stupid and downright fucking pathetic. the heat between my legs blooms.

oscar, to give him his dues, doesn’t contact me again. no matter how many holidays passed, no matter how many years I grew older, nothing at all.

it isn’t until I see the video of oscar and that driver, shaking hands with a smile after a race, together like some form of sad poetry do I know its for the better.

when I win a race and max kisses me, hot and senseless, on the mouth, when he takes me out passed after hours to get me food I desire. when he wishes me a happy birthday every five minutes on my birthday because he’s so excited.

that’s when I know it’s for the better — when I reveal our engagement a week after oscar does.

I know it’s for the better, but sometimes I wish it was me looking up at him, his pretty ring on my finger.

#f1 x reader #max verstappen x reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x you #max verstappen #max verstappen x you #max verstappen imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 smut #f1 x driver!reader #oscar piastri #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri x female reader

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artsyannierose · 7 months

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Nene’s Dead Corpse and her ghost bf

randomly made a crap ton more sense to me

why?

fricking school (screw school I hate you (no not rly I’m just stressed))

Anyway I’m a biomed class where unit 1 is studying medical investigations forensic science style

and one of the things is like, what happens to a person after the body has been dead for a while (post mortem or sum, see im learning :D)

Things like algor mortis, livor mortis, I’ve heard of. In fact I’ve even studied the clouding of the corneas before, but it never got to me till today

maybe it’s cause I cannot for the life of me study forensics without my wild imagination giving me nightmares or just panicking when I’m alone but aNyWays

I tend to imagine characters associated with death in these scenarios so I don’t lose it in class💀

*cough* Nene *cough cough*

So as I was taking notes on the slideshow, some of the images of clouded corneas reminded me strangely of something familiar, but at that point I couldn’t tell. There’s something haunting about the eyes (or maybe it’s just my over-analytical brain loving small details like this) they’re GORGEOUS

IDK THEYRE PRETTY

Maybe it’s ‘cause the true color of the iris is completely visible in all its glory, without the pupil obscuring it

(something like this?? A little vivid tho lol)

but like

there’s no

life

no reflection, no emotion…nothing (which is so hauntingly beautiful leave me alone I’m a sucker for this now)

it’s literally just an eye with nothing but color

and then it hit me…it’s exactly the look Nene had when Mirai fast-forwarded her time

you can see in the image it’s just her plain magenta eyes with a fuzzy de-saturated blob in the center…aka clouded corneas

And that honestly made me realize that in this scene she’s not—she’s not even unconscious

No she’s literally, physiologically dead

THAT IS A CORPSE HE IS HOLDING

she is literally a dead body this hits me so hard😭😭

and I can imagine algor mortis kicked in by then, her body was probably cold to the touch

so imagine how he felt, and I’m aware people have analyzed his emotions but just think about it

he’s always seen her so full of life and hope, and now all he has left is an empty shell of her, cold and dead with no life left inside

…just like him

the more I think about it Hanako is just an animated corpse

he has no reflection in his eyes most of the time because he is ✨dead✨

I mean Mei, Mitsuba, and Hanako don’t have a little white reflection dot like Nene and Kou

Or maybe I’m overthinking it and Nene’s eyes are just super reflective

even for someone who presumably took his own life, he probably never saw tsukasa’s body start postmortem and actually feel dead bc it looked extremely bloody ngl (I’m guessing he killed himself right after 💔)

and now he’s holding someone he cares about like this for the first time and I’ll bet that scarred him

and he figured out that never, never ever did he ever want to see his sweet assistant like this again, lifeless in his arms

and so after that, cue Hanako in his villain era who basically became a yandere the entire picture perfect lmao

and he was unbelievably adamant about it too

I mean honestly if I held anybody I knew lifeless like that I’d be scarred for life and crying for days

seeing the light drained from someone’s eyes is so interestingly sad to me

Look at the difference:

Happy

vs Sad/Determined

vs Depressed (ig??)

vs Dead

She still has so much emotion in her eyes

and then d e a d

literally looks like a porcelain doll

wait she looks so pale in the last image compared to the others now that I think about it

I love aidairo’s eye for detail it’s so fun to figure out

Well anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk essay atp-

IT’S PAST 1 AM AND I SHOULD BE STUDYING FOR SAID BIOMED CLASS AND HERE I AN GOING ON A TANGENT ABOUT A FICTIONAL CHARACTER’S EYES

send help

anyways excuse me while I grab a box of strawberries to munch on and cry my eyes out all over my homework before I sleep-

#hananene #tbhk #jshk #hanako kun #toilet bound hanako-kun #yashiro nene #tbhk manga spoilers #aidairo #my ramblings #my rambles #i literally have to wake up in 3 hours what am I doing #Yknow screw school Hananene is more important #i love angst #they’re so bittersweet #and beautiful

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aerkame · 10 months

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Im curious,, since the puppets are in the real world but what about home? Do home feel betrayed or sad that the puppets suddenly dissappear from him.

Or home know about this and let wally do his own thing or...? (Alive au)

At first, Home was heartbroken.

He knew Wally had figured out how to visit the other world, the world outside their own, the one they were made in. But the little fellow would always come back to the neighborhood after a short visit to see what was happening on the outside. He didn't come back this time.

And when Home woke up one day, he found all of the neighbors had left. Not a single soul was in the now empty neighborhood. It hurt, it hurt so much that he was alone. But the silence was the worst part of it all. There were no jokes, no laughter, no "Hello" or "Goodnight", just silence.

Home was growing weary, depressed. The days kept going and Home found it was best to just sleep and dream. There was nothing left here to see anyways.

It came suddenly and out of nowhere. Wally's voice called out for Home in his dreams.

Wally found a way to reach back into the neighborhood again. He admits, it's been difficult recently to get back in ever since they've gone through physical changes. But he needed to get Home out.

"Home! It's so good to finally see you again, I was starting to worry I might never be able to reach you." Wally looked up at Home, now being back to his usual short height as a puppet.

The eyes looked down, if they could cry, they would.

"Wally...it's been so long. Where have you and the others been? I've been so worried...so sad without you."

The puppet patted the side of the wall before sitting down. "I'm sorry about that Home. I tried getting back several times, but it's been difficult recently. We've started to change in the other place. We don't quite look like this." He gestured to his own body.

"And..."Wally paused, peering out to the neighborhood, the colors were fading and there was no longer a forest outside. "I think this world might be dying. Or, it might be moving somewhere else, somewhere in the real world."

Home wanted to question Wally's choice of words, but chose to stay quiet and let him finish.

"But I know how to take you with us now." The windows widened in shock.

"It'll leave me drained for a bit, I might end up sleeping for a long time even, but I know someone who will be of great help. They're the one who has been letting us stay in their house. And, I think our host is the one who brought us to life there." Wally was now pacing back and forth in the house thinking. "I need you to trust them, please. I know they aren't a neighbor, but they have a heart of gold and the magic touch to help you get out of here."

The floors creaked as Home thought long and hard. He never really trusted people. Especially knowing that it was people, humans, who made them. Humans who made this world that they lived in. Humans...who trapped them in a bubble of a world. But, Wally was never one to bluff or exaggerate. Wally was also not as naive as the others so he knew a bad human when he saw one.

"Alright." The windows narrowed as Home closed his eyes. "I trust you Darling."

Am I implying that the Neighborhood is coming to the real world and the reader really does have magic? Maybe. :)

#welcome home #welcome home home #alive au #welcome home alive au #welcome home au #magic reader #wally darling #welcome home wally darling

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tilvcei · 1 year

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hi angel. i absolutely love your writing and i was wondering if you could write something fitting this trope with ethan landry and black!fem reader. maybe them getting in a fight bc ethan is drunk and her just being tired of the shit bc he does this every time. i think you have the skill to write this with the emotional depth it needs based on what i’ve seen. love you ! x

feel free to ignore this if you’re not accepting requests! i couldn’t find an faq or anything before i sent this so i’m sorry just in case <3

► 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐓

⭢ In which: you haven’t been on the best path and try to hold everything in at once, but one person you care deeply for starts to notice. so, you just let the tears fall.

☆ | warning(s): angst, language, abusive household, alcohol,

☆ | note: request are open, actually! also thank you for the request because my inbox is empty 😭 also yes i made this very sad and I’m being truthful I cried myself while writing this, let me know if you want me to change it! thanks for requesting sweetheart <3 I can also relate to this one, I put some things that have happened to me in this writing— but other than that lemme stop rambling, enjoy :) [im not in college lol, that’s just an insert so the story makes sense] THIS IS SHORT, IM SORRY

☆ | gender: she/her (black!reader)

tagging 🏷: @ncllcraines

Today was rather a normal day. no killings or anything- well, not yet at least. you’ve been dealing with a lot. school, home, basically everything all together.

Not just that, you’ve been falling behind on college too. one of the teachers suggested you may need a tutor, which you lied and said you didn’t but they gave you one anyways.

And that tutor was Ethan thankfully. having to take care of your siblings was the only thing on your mind at the time. your mom is barely home cause of work. so being the big sister that you are you decided to step in and help.

you had stayed up overnight, working on everything without taking a break. this was a real struggle, your mom and step-dad were alcoholics at once, but then stopped when they realized what damages were happening since your step-dad had a mini stroke.

But other than that everything has been good, but for you? therapy was suggested from your mom.

on some days you were happy, some days sad. randomly out of nowhere you started feeling depressed.

Sleeping habits started changing, you started going asleep around 1:00/3:00 at night and when you’d wake up you’d still feel tired.

Working late shifts, just all of that was bothering you. and you were behind on exams, right now ethan was in your dorm, helping you with your work.

"So, do you know how many bones were fractured? it shows it on…let’s see, page 27. if we go back, we can find the answer on page 20." Ethan said, you sat there sulking.

You really didn’t understand the point of this, "do we have to do this? I understand this is important for my future but-" you were cut off by ethan.

"(Y/n). if you don’t want to finish this oh well, I’m going to help you. you’re going to be successful." Ethan said, you groaned in annoyance and looked back down at the sheet.

A sigh came from his lips, the only thing he wanted was the best for you. he could see how much you were struggling, he could see what you were trying to do.

"Are you sure everything is okay? you’ve been distant lately." Ethan said, when he asked that question you stiffened.

Why was he bringing that up now? nothing was wrong you were just extremely frustrated at the moment.

"I-I’m sorry. did I say something wrong?" asked ethan, you rubbed a tired hand over your face. the stress was evident on your face.

"I think I’m at my breaking point. you know how you just get tired of having to hold everything down all at once? if I’m being honest: I can’t- I…" you trailed off, as much as you were trying to hold your composure.

Then the tears started to fall, ethan wasn’t really shocked though, he knew what you were going through but waited for you to open up about it.

"You’re crying." Ethan said with a frown, he was startled when you wrapped him in a hug, "I’m just tired, ethan. of everything." you told him while sobbing.

"I know, I know. but it’s okay sweetheart, we could just put this to the side and lay down for a bit? if you want." Ethan suggested.

"Actually, that’s a great idea. I need a break anyways." You agreed, Ethan nodded and placed some of the books and sheets on the table.

Arms found themselves wrapping around your waist, maybe this was what you needed, some type of comfort. after all you’ve been dealing with a lot lately.

"Thank you, ethan. for being here." you said, he didn’t reply and instead placed a kiss on your cheek, "Anytime, love."

He was your safe place.

Im so sorry this was short, it was horrible also ik 😭 and this also felt rushed. I might fix some things up here, also if anyone would like to send request go ahead!! my inbox is open :D

#black reader #scream 6 #scream 6 x reader #scream vi #scream vi x reader

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grink · 3 months

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local live music has the capacity to make me so so so sad cuz i kinda just left it all behind. its all i used to think about, i couldve never left ohio, i could still be playing music trying my hardest to make it all work, but i decided to leave and go to college and get a stupid corporate job and move to a big city and live out my 18 year old boy dream and this shit is so depressing like. i live right next to the club. every friday they play 2010s throwbacks. most of the time its empty and all i hear outside my window is occasional screaming and shouting from the extremely hotheaded people walking by. theres no place sadder than the club. and god theres nothing worse to be surrounded by than concrete. i dont just wanna see a few trees that fit between buildings, i wanna see a forest. i havent seen a fucking forest in years. we like dont even have bugs here. i wanna walk in the river and get my shoes wet. i wanna look for the rocks that arent too slippery to stand on. maybe fuck up a bit and slip anyways and get some little cuts or scrapes that'll scar and be stories for me forever. i wanna climb a tree. i wanna see stars. i wanna feel like im at home somewhere. dont get me wrong this city is my home now and i have a few things to really love here, i guess im just venting some totally non-actionable emotions cuz its friday again for the millionth week in a row and im sitting here crying cuz its what i do best. grass is always greener etc etc

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naveries · 7 months

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august? — I ADORE HER!

PAIRING: non-idol!beomgyu × fem!reader, implied crushes + possible other pairings

STATUS. ongoing!

SYNOPSIS. YL/N Y/N, the delivery girl to her small town not too far from the City finds herself around town, taking many odd jobs and contributing to her community in more ways than one. But now she finds it hard to say no these approaching her final days of High School. On top of that, her true love & passion for music catches up with her as too as her band, finding herself taking on the role of lead singer once again. Can she handle it?

WARNINGS. swearing but not too heavy, kys joke, mentions of abusive parental guardians, mentions of depression, anxiety (might go into detail) & unaliving. possible sensual comments here and there, im not one to write those things but who knows, there will be a warning if so. y/n is a mess mentally and only at a certain point in the story, physically, financially, academically & socially. characters can be immature at times but who isn’t! possible mentions injuries & scars. a whole lot of sad and mad and happy.

The upstairs of Wonyoung’s restaurant has always been closed off from the public, simply because it wasn’t always in their budget to finance more decor and furniture to fill the space, nor the customers. But Wonyoung always thought it was important to clean the space from time to time anyway. You agreed with her on that. It just felt better working in a place, especially with food, where the upstairs room above you was also just as well kept and clean. No dust flying around, no rodents, and no mold or rust. Hopefully anyway, you really hate mold.

And it was a nice space too, the way it was built let them sunlight seep in from the window just right and the antique chandelier from the previous owners of building from 8 years ago (they never took it back, they just left it) dangling in the middle of the empty room just made it feel very picturesque. You all take turns cleaning it too of course. (Wonyoung said it was fine, but you all wouldn’t have it since all of you together spent time in the room)

Because of the fact Wonyoung was really the only one who kept the room clean, and insisted her parents on keeping it that way. She made the decisions regarding the room. And her second decision — after the decision of her being the only one in charge of to maintain the unoccupied second floor. The only one out of her and her parents wanting to keep the upstairs — was to show you Hyunjin around. To other people, it was an empty dusty room, but luckily to the three of you- as soon as you three finished cleaning the place together- you all found it to be a spacious and comfortable hideaway.

It became a really special place. Times like practicing for your audition with two best friend's and the Jang Family coaching you, or the many times the three of you blast music from the tiny speaker sitting in the middle of the room, as you all dance around for fun. (And — of course — come high school, the addition of Sunghoon and Jungwon)

The five of you were upstairs often, if you all needed the space to study, if you and Wonyoung are still working a shift and the boys are upstairs studying or playing board games (board games; kept on the singular shelf you all keep in the room), when one of you have a bad day and you all just wanna be in privacy together, or sometimes your grandfather would bring you guys some food for dinner together, as if you were all a one big happy family.

Fast forward to led to your head lying in Wonyoung's lap alone here on the second level of the restaurant, under the off chandelier, the fairy lights by the windows (You and Hyunjin set up with Wonyoung’s parents for Wonyoung on her 14th birthday. In which she never wanted to take them down) splayed the room in a warm eerie tone.

She nor Hyunjin doesn’t know why you’re reacting like this, why him being here is such an issue. Did something ever happen between you and Beomgyu? They never knew because you never brought him up or answered them clearly enough to figure out a single clue.

“Was this recently?” Wonyoung keeps her voice gentle and comforting as ever, whilst she combs through the tangles in your hair.

"No, I've been feeling like this for a while now" you say while lying in her lap, a blank expression on your face as you stare blankly at a spot on the wooden floors.

“But there’s a this to talk about?” she suggests, trying to piece things together with the little vague bits of information you’re giving her. She continues runs her hands through the silky strands of your hair as you lie in silence. You don't know what or how to say how weird things have been for you recently.

“What’s on your mind baby?” she ask, carefully treading on this topic for the umpteenth time. Not wanting to press on the topic too hard in fear of scaring you away once again.

“Nothing, I’m fine” something very far from the truth, shifting uncomfortably in her lap

“You’re lying to me again...” she sighs disappointedly, but her continuous strokes through your hair don't falter, she knows your desperately wracking through your brain to give her a clear answer. But your stomach still turns in guilt as you can hear the calmness of her voice slowly being invaded by her disappointment. However, an inhale and exhale later, she's calm again. She knows better than anyone how much you're going through and decides to keep her head and hold her ground in case you do decide to spill.

You lie there silent, frustration growing through your insides as you can recall so many other moments of people wanting to be there for you but you stand there unable to grasp an edge. You hate how much it feels like these feelings of tease your senses. As much as you dislike many things about yourself, is mending the endless amount of pain and guilt in your life really such a selfish thing to do?

You close your eyes, pressing your lips together, inhaling, then exhaling out the nerves. “There's a lot happening and I don't wanna jinx the possibilities by talking about this" you blink anxiously as you make a conscious decision to move past your nerves and instead, forward.

Staring down at your head resting in her lap, she smiles, “Your mind works as if you’re living a bad movie storyline" chuckling as she successfully unties a knot in your hair and continues to comb through "That's terrible thinking you know"

“Well television were my only source from my childhood when it came to looking at healthy human behaviour” you argue.

She just laughs "That's fair"

And as lighthearted laughter begins to fill the room, you hear the pattern of familiar footsteps making its way over to you and Wonyoung. Bless the old and squeaky floorboards from keeping anyone from sneaking up on any of you.

“So how’re you feeling now then? Something tells me you might not need a hug anymore” Jungwon asks concerned as he takes a seat in front of you and Wonyoung.

"While I am feeling better, but I hope you know I would never turn down a hug from you" you say smittenly as you smile up to him.

He wears a plain blank expression but to anyone who knew Jungwon better, he was hiding a lot more. Something you've come to admire him for, his ability to keep his emotions in check regardless on how hard reality came to take shots at his dreams and deepest wishes.

You notice him staring at your hand. Realizing that the look in his eyes means he's contemplating whether or not it's okay to soothe you the way Wonyoung is doing right now or give you the space you deserve. And as your stomach fills with warmth from his mindfulness, you reassure him of his worries as you reach out your hand for his. And as soon as his eyes catch sight of your hand floating towards his he carefully takes your hand in his. Drawing circles on the dorsal side of your hand.

The three of you sit there in silence for a while as you close your eyes taking it all in. Before you could've maybe watched on TV on how kids your age would find their way around their problems with their friends and endless amount of wit, as you watched envious. But here you are now in between two very important people in your life and you can't help but feel nothing but grateful to have them here, wanting to savour this feeling forever.

"You know you walk past a lot of people you went to your old middle school with, like Yeosang hyung or Yeji noona" Jungwon says, still holding your hand.

"But?" you retort, knowing there's more.

"But you don't usually spook the way you did downstairs a few moments ago" he says carefully. You can tell by the way his eyes are barely leaving his hands holding yours that he's afraid you might try and run away & avoid the topic of, what you like to call, your bad feelings. Courtesy of your bad conditioning from your parents.

Wonyoung, out of no where, pinches his side and he yelps in surprise. You turn your head to look up at Wonyoung confused, as you find her glaring at Jungwon, and a pout sitting on her face.

"Ow?! What was that for?" he winces as he uses his other hand to rub his side.

"Real subtle Yang!" She spits in frustration, you wonder how her voice is still as elegant and as honey-like as ever, "Here I am, trying to be as gentle and patient with Y/N as possible. Aaand you just jump right on in to the problem! No warning!" she says as she pinches him again.

"Ow! I'm sorry! I'm not as good at this as you are!" he says, wincing in pain while still rubbing the side Wonyoung pinched him twice in.

You chuckle "Hey, no hurting each other on my account please, or off for that matter" you say, your voice sounding a bit croaky and drowsy from lying down all this time.

Letting go of Jungwon's hand, you slowly get up from Wonyoung's lap and let out small sighs while you stretch your arms a bit. Turning your head back to them as your finally sitting upright, you smile endearingly at them.

"And I'm fine okay? Nothing to worry about" You say chipper, yet breathy, voice your body can offer. The same one you use to charm customers from your grandfather's shop into buying furniture they could use.

And well- you're not fine, but you didn't even know yourself what reason, or why you were reacting this way around him. Why your head and chest felt heavy around him or what kind of voodoo sign this meant. Not that you believed in things like that anyway.

And thinking about it now, you don't like the idea of you going through, maybe the next few days or weeks, debating whether or not this means more than the simple relationship status of ex-bandmates you share with him now.

And you most certainly don't like the idea of looking dumb as you struggle to annunciate vowels like a baby learning to talk, trying to describe this all for Wonyoung and Jungwon.

They both look at each other confused, then back at you, watchin as you pick up yourself from the floor and dust off your apron and tie your hair back up.

"Sorry for scare, but I'm okay. Let's just get back to the customers downstairs, yeah?" you say cheerily as you point a finger over at the staircase and begin to make your way over there in a hurry.

"Could've sworn I saw more people coming in from earlier!" and your voice fades out from the distance. Leaving the two Won's feeling like they missed something.

Exchanging a final look between each other, and with Wonyoung helping Jungwon find his footing again, they both decide to start to follow your direction and head downstairs.

Walking side by side Wonyoung lets out an exasperated sigh, looking down at the floor as she treads her feet over to the staircase.

Looking over at her for moment, Jungwon sighs as he lifts his arm to pull her closer to him and caresses her shoulder as they both walk downstairs.

previous / masterlist / next / playlist

(send asks or comment to be added to permanent/taglist)

permanent taglist: @h00nerz @jjunis

taglist: @grl-wndr @h00nerz @txtaetertots @toiletfeet68 @woncheecks @destairea

#— august?#beomgyu x reader #beomgyu #beomgyu fanfic #beomgyu fluff #choi beomgyu #choi beomgyu x reader #beomgyu smau #beomgyu x y/n #txt smau #txt x reader

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mikeyelistsukasa · 2 years

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How about a idol/famous? (Idk) au where Mitsuba, Kou, and Teru who loves to spoil their shy s/o to death, but they have a hard time smiling due to their past? And they will try anything to make their s/o smile no matter what, so they went to this random event where they finally smiled for the first time (hopefully this made sense 🥲)

(ALSO I LOVED THE DRAWINGS YOU MADE 🥺💖)

I can’t believe i needed a month for it. Mitsuba’s is so short because i lost the files for him 6TIMES i struggled w the request so i had to change it a bit so sorry abt that.not proofread

How the hell did u two end up together ??????

Srsly HOW

Ohhhhh you were sakura’s/tsukasa’s/kou’s friend how classssiccc🙄

Anyway-

Since we talk about Mitsuba it’s obvious that he would first say some nasty remarks every time he saw you sad

But that didn’t help(well obviously what did you expect)

Thats why he tried ACTUALLY offered to listen to your struggles

Wdym u don’t need noone to talk??? Then stop being sad>:(

Buying your favourites also didn’t help you awe :(

So he decided to do something he thought he would never do

Bring you to his favourite secret place

„Can i finally open my eyes?“

You say in a exhausting voice

„Not yet so stop nagging“

You mentally rolled your eyes

„Alright we are here“

„Finally! It’s about….time“

„I introduce you! My hiding spot✨“

„Mitsuba…this…this is amazing!“

„Ofc its amazing! My taste in places was always…beautiful…“

His mind was empty when he saw your face.your smile.

It was so beautiful!

„Thank you mitsuba! You’re the best“

After you gave him a small kiss on the cheek he promised himself one thing

He’d promise to make you smile like that more often

Now you two together make more sense 🤝

He also found out about by someone else (aka yashiro or teru)

This poor boy was kind of nervous approaching you

You thought he was nervous to talk to you because he found out who you are but-

That wasn’t the case

Like AT ALL

its just that he is sorta shy around new people(mostly girls)

And you kind of looked sad so he thought maybe it was a bad timing to approach you

You were relieved that it wasn’t the first thing you thought

As you two started talking more and more you two developed feelings for eachother

You liked how kou gave his best to make you smile

You two enjoyed baking together

But one day

You felt comfortable enough around him to reveal yourself as an idol/singer

The exorcist was too stunned to speak

This dude started treating you like you’re a queen and he went back to his shy self

Like a celebrity? Hanging out with HIM?

„Im probably dreaming“

*pinch*

…

He wasn’t dreaming at all

His crush a celebrity wow

Lord have mercy when you two started dating

Him being a bit insecure always thought that you don’t like being with him

Thats why he was bringing you lots of gift in some hopes

„S/o-san/kun! I baked you these heart shaped mini cakes! Please take them!!!“

„Oh thank you kou you didn’t had to…“

T-T mission failed you didn’t smile

More like the opposite you looked even more depressed

Its not that you didn’t like the gift its just it feels as if he made you these just because of who you are

God were you wrong

He came home disappointed when suddenly his brother teru popped up

„Yo kou. Look ive got 2 tickets from a secret admirer at school. Probably another fan.I don’t feel like going so i thought maybe you might want them?“

💡💡💡

„YES PLEASE GIVE ME“

„Haha calm down here“

It was 2 tickets for a… carnival?

Nonetheless he thought it was worth a shot

He looked at the data of the tickets and asked you if you could come to *address* at *idk insert some time*

You messaged back with a yes since you got curious on why he wants to see you so badly.

You dressed up not too fancy and went on your way

„Hey! So where are we going?“

„TO Aaaaaaa CARNIVAL!“

„Carn-? Woah hey no need to pull im coming im coming“

You two only took one step into the carnival and your eyes were already glowing from excitement

„Woah…“

„Follow me!“

Lets just say you had lots of fun on all those rides

Kou even won you a huge white rabbit! How adorable

Before you guys went home you two decided to go on the ferry wheel

When you two got on top of it you were able to see everything from up there.

Thats when you smile.

„Look! It’s that trashy ride that made me throw up hahahah…“

It felt like the whole time froze when he saw your smile

I mean you were so happy what else could you want more other than being on a top of a ferry wheel with your beloved one and a huge stuffed animal.

You looked into kou‘s direction

„thank you kou. I owe you one“

That smile was weak but it was a genuine soft smile

„I-uh uhm well no wait- it’s alright no problem hah-„

He will definitely cook teru his favourite meal after this ends

You two met at cooking class(let’s pretend tbhk has this)

„S/o L/n and teru minamoto“

Suddenly you felt like everyone was staring at you

Which they were

„Hey! Im teru nice to meet you. Im gonna be your partner for today. Im bad at cooking though so i will just try to assist you“

„I- uhm no Worries“

He cant be THAT bad at cooking right?

„WHY IS THE OVEN TURNED ON SUCH A HIGH DEGREE IT BURNED THE BUNS“

„Ah sorry my bad haha“

„why you little-„

*death stares around the room*

„Hah its alright we can make new ones“

It was fun to hangout with you so he decided to secretly keep having contact with you

*cough cough cuz of fans cough*

As much as he enjoyed your company he noticed that he never saw you genuinely smile.

He did question at least once

„Hey um are you alright?“

If you won’t tell him he would be concerned on what is going on but won’t push you into telling him

He is honestly the only one that won’t put lots of effort into making you smile

Buuut he will try eventually

But to no luck just like the other two

But one day one of his fans gave him 2 tickets to a show to look at the dolphins. As a thank you for helping them yesterday

The two tickets were meant for him and his brother kou and well

The thing is kou has detention

„i warned him. You will get caught in the girls bathroom eventually“

He laughed to himself remembering the scene

Thats when it hit him that he could invite you

You ofc not having anything to do exept be prepared for the next concert agreed

You didn’t know the tickets were given to him

So you eventually took your seats and waited for the show to start.

It was fun. But not fun enough to make you smile

He already lost all his hopes while standing in a line with you to pet the dolphins

Thats when a miracle happened

You smiled to yourself when the dolphin made a sound from your touch

„Do you think he likes it teru?“

„Hm? Oh yeah i gue𝚜𝚜...’’

Woah

So is that how you like when you smile?

Ngl this made the boy blush a little

Its like he fell for you again.

He sat down next to you to pet the dolphin with you.

“You know…”

“?”

“You should smile more often.it looks good on you sweetheart”

0///0

Thank you for your request sorry it took so long🥲 have a nice day and visit again!

#tbhk x reader #x reader #tbhk x y/n #jshk x reader #mitsuba x reader #tbhk mitsuba #tbhk kou #tbhk teru #teru x reader #kou x reader

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sadautis96 · 1 year

Text

TW SUI IDEATION

We all die in the end ,so why wait for the inevitable ? I hate myself so much ,feel so sad n empty ,i just want to die ,im tired and exhausted. Tired of this life. Every time i look in the mirror i see someone ugly. I wish things couldve turned out differently ,but 26 years of my life is a bit much. Why do i keep living when my mind just wants to die ? I know what i must do ,but im in constant doubts at this moment.. should i ,shouldn't i ? Im scared of death but ,at the same time ,i just want this all to end ,no matter how much i try.. you may think im giving up or a coward ,but so what ? Call me selfish ,idgaf anymore ,im too sad ,depressed ,and yet ,i walk outside pretending that everythings fine when in actuality ,theyre not. I dont always understand everything. Who cares. Whatever. It's like i feel completely indifferent while writing all of this... i know im sad.. but idk ,kinda feels like im not even here.. all i can think of is seeing my blood.. seeing myself in hospital ,dying.. im not right at all.. who i am i anyways ,pathetic ,maybe she's right after all :(

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thegroundsofbrooklyn · 11 months

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I MISSED YOU TOO TUMBLR IS AGAINST ME IT KEEPS EATING MY ASKS THOUGH IT SAID THEY SENT

OKAY SO THE PEOPLE FROM YOUR CORNER OF THE WORLD ONE DIRECTION I love Louis tomlinson so much. I loved him in 1d and loce him now. We had lots of pride stuff at our shows because well do you know the story of Larry stylinson? -Louis probably isn't straight (I mean being in love with your male best friend would suggest) but he has never specifically said what he is also he's so support of his LGBT fans and we love and support him so so much. He's so sweet and his music is great and real and he writes about sad things too!

soooooo I drove 3 hours to Ohio to see him on Thursday after work. I almost got heat exhaustion so hot. They did not have plain water for sale at like 80%of the vendors it was just beer and cocktails (yuck and also NOT HELPFUL IN 90 DEGREE HEAT), got upgraded for free Cuz they had empty seats closer (oh my fucking gosh I almost died of excitement l) IT WAS AMAZING HE WAS GREAT. I then proceeded to drive back and go to work on literally an hour or 2 of sleep and since the pandemic no where's open late anymore so I didn't eat for a day and a half opps.

I went to his Detroit show yesterday and it was lit. He literally said we were fucking unbelieveable a minimum of 4 times and thanked us and called Ohio then michigan(both of which I was at) the best shows his entire tour. I just wanted to hug him like a bazillion times.

#one directioner forever sorry to ramble about my lifelong love for 5 boys from the UK. I just love things veryyyyyyy intensely. Maybe not the normal amount but hey

The staff wouldnt let us get streamers from off the ground :( I know that's probably an odd thing to want what can I say it's a memory. Although I didnt basically sleep for 3 days it was so amazing and completely worth it. I wish I could live it a million times over. Everyone was happy, and Louis was happy:) I am not social, but the atmosphere of concerts and to a different degree professional theater is just something else. We're all there for one thing, and it's so Beautiful. It's one of those times that for me personally my depression anxiety and borderline are far from my mind. I feel euphoric on top of the world and being happy is very nice. Being happy with others; seeing two friends dance or shout words to each other or smile it makes you happy too. Even when I don't know them. So I guess I am social in liking to be around people but just not good at speaking to them.

I also lost my car in a field because they have no signage and in a sea of cars where the fuck did I park. Who knows I wandered for 20 minutes until I finally stumbled upon it. I can't even imagine those people who drink then look for cars like my human you bad decisioned.

My most unfavorite part of concerts is just getting out of the traffic jam afterword. I've learned to get to your car and sit there until there is no line of cars waiting and you're golden. (That usually takes a while bit is worth the headache and wasted gas. )

THAT IS SUPER EXCITING!! I wish you were going next month, lol. I hope you have the most fun!!!! Ahhhh boo tests BUT YAY CONCLUSION!!! That means in a few weeks I can annoy you with all the newsies thoughts xD

I WILL SEND MY FIC IDEA IN A DIFFERENT ASK BECAUSE IM SORRY THIS IS LONG. I kind of apologize for that but you did say tell you all the shenanigans xD

oh my god that sounds incredible and also so chaotic 😭 six year old me had the BIGGEST crush on all of one direction smdmdj i'm so happy you had a great time anon :))

i am going to west endsies next month, but only closing night because i'm away in the usa for about the first half of it anyway ... but i can always buy more tickets ...... 👀

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everyman0 · 1 year

Text

touching base

here i am...standing in front of the house again.

i havent been here in months. i didnt exactly intend on coming back but it turns out theres some things i may have missed. information i didnt know i needed until very recently.

however, im not ready to go back in there just yet.

first id like to back track a little to what happened after i got that safe open, and how this has led me to returning to the house. ive summarized my conclusions in the previous entry...this is the full scoop. buckle in.

so, i went dark for a while after finding the safe. i wandered from abandoned house to abandoned house, mulling over my situation all the while. i kept an eye out for anything suspicious or interesting, but there was nothing. no ghost jeff, no cat, even the empty apparitions populating the stores in town seemed to be getting bored somehow. and neither evan nor habit showed up, of course.

i didnt stop posting because i was sad and giving up; instead, more so than anything else...i was becoming very, very angry.

at first i didnt fully understand why i was so mad, just that i no longer felt like crying over everything i'd already cried about. that well was drying up fast. i knew i had plenty of reasons to be angry, but each of them on their own couldnt truly encapsulate the raging flame of fury that was growing within me.

the thing is, i decided to leave the house to be better than the vinny i saw in the mirror, to find the answers for myself instead of waiting around for habit to finalize my fate for me. i wanted to take my control back because another version of me never did.

instead, i spent so long just...staring at that gun. i wondered what it could be used for, besides killing myself anyways. i read the papers about the house about a hundred times over and still, none of it was particularly relevant to me. it wouldnt have been relevant to anyone else either, which is why i decided not to share it - riveting, right? and the fireworks? i simply left them with the safe. what else was i supposed to do with those?

all of that was pretty useless shit on its own, shit a more depressed and inattentive me from a few months ago simply accepted. the real spit in the face came from the symbol on the bullets.

habit wanted me to see it, but why? it doesnt mean anything to me, to my knowledge. it probably should though, and theres some reason why i cant pick up on its power. its just another cruel reminder of how little i actually know about anything, despite this "true sight" i have.

why was no progress being made? because these tid-bits of information habit left behind arent puzzles, they are just crumbs to keep me distracted while hes perfecting his own plans. and all this time ive been thinking i was the one who was going to get ahead in the game.

i am furious, because i let him distract me again.

i let him waste my time, again.

i let him have months and months to plan my demise while ive been stuck on one stupid clue, again.

i let him scare me.

hurt me.

kill me.

even lose to me in another life. and in his own defeat, habit still won in a way. he gave up and i let him off scot free, just like that. im humiliated by it.

...

my plan begins at the house. habit's shit is probably still inside - i mean his actual belongings, not whatever he's been feeding me. im going to go through his stuff as well as check out the library. theres gotta be something more to find there.

i am ending this the way i want to.

#evrymn0 #phase4

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friesian · 2 years

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In case you're unable to sleep, it is my turn to show up with questions for a blorbo that spins in my head like a rotisserie chicken!!!

Marwyd is such a delight, love him dearly, how does he react to crushes or confessions of love from fans of The Commander?

Also how'd he react to Aurene as a whole? First egg thoughts? Reactions to suddenly having a daughter? Years down the line for EoD?

@mystery-salad

ur on the NOSE with me not being able to sleep.... this shall keep me entertained tho!!!

SO. LOVE CONFESSIONS HUH??? especially from random folks. hoo boy. well, honestly i think he's VERY caught off guard that anyone would be his 'fan'. he very much only thinks of himself as 'some guy with a lot on his shoulders'. he understands his importance but not really like... how that importance gets around socially. so if someone just came up and tried to confess their love (especially feminine aligned folk) i think he'd literally just reply "why?????" LOL.

if masculine folk started doing it however he'd similiarly be like "why??" but also keep your voice down. stop it. "im not uh-- like that. i guess." he'd say, shooing them away. "i appreciate it but you gotta go, aight?" he's VERY odd about masculine folk doing it moreso than anything else. ESPECIALLY sylvari who are masculine and smaller than him that have short hair. he lives in a hell world created by his own talent.

so the short answer? doesnt get crushes and why anyone would crush on him. he doesn't percieve himself as anything attractive or special. he's just A Guy.

NOW. AURENE. my god thats a can of worms. initially the egg was conflicting for him. chosen by something like that? probably a fluke. was probably made for caithe. she is a pale tree firstborne and they're the big dogs. they know their dreams and their hunt. not marwyd. so whatever this is would PROBABLY be temporary.

however when aurene hatched, combined with the loss of trahearne. it was. something new for him.

to be honest aurene was one of the only things keeping him going mentally between LWS3 and PoF. he took being a dad VERY seriously and with so much love and care. he'd visit ALL the time. new toys. new food he made. he started coming up with lullabys on his banjo (which i know EXACTLY what song he sang. i use it in his playlist at the end. bc. you know). he really stepped up. though near the end his depression and trauma after all he went through really ended up getting to him. i would have a WHOLE thing about PoF marwyd bc that is a SPECIAL flavor of cowboy but i will not do that here.

anyways, near the end he will STILL father her like a baby. he still comes with new toys he invented. he will still cook her dinners. he still loves to play her lullaby on his banjo. at EoD i have a feeling that he's pretty sad. all his "kids" have grown up. they're adults with relationships, jobs, work, you name it. he's got an empty nest and now he just fills it with constant work. he's going back to keep helping elonia, or he's in cantha working on conceptualizing more ways to help dragon jade have an extended lifespan with yao. he's all work even when he's supposed to be vacationing or taking a break, but he's just sad he can't hold that little dragon in his arms anymore and it shows.

#I PROBABLY WOULDVE GONE LONGER. BUT. im on my phone and im being brief #pof marwyd is. good god.#it is BAD. in a good way.#even LWS3 marwyd is kinda bad.#either way. GOD HE LOVES HIS DAUGHTER.#marwyd is the dad i want. i want him.#eod spoilers #end of dragons spoilers

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borderline-vents · 1 month

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//fp issues, v light mention of sh/suicidal thoughts, extreme splitting idk

been having the worst fucking time .am graduating soon . the senior party we'regoing to a theme park. decided oh my gods . I've never been to one before .i want so fucking badly to go w/ my fp(who graduated last year) i start daydreaming im on a high im so fucking happy and excited. i sign up . then i find out i cant bring my fp . start breaking down. complain to my mother . she says 'i see I'm not enough for you. ok.' because idk me saying i want to make memories with my friend at a theme park means shes a failure of a mother? idk. shes like that. my fp calls and im upset. i explain the situation to her and almost start crying. (i was crying but not audibly) im so fucking miserable . she says ok ill ask my stepdad to help. im out here crashing hard so miserable everything is pointless maybe i should kill myself to make the organizers regret not letting me bring her. any ways the stepfather says ok so fp needs 2 get a license and a car and drive 6 hrs , or get a plane, but it's possible . he gets off call. (fuck im still on call with her and her attempts to comfort me are making me split hard . im apathy rn shes saying 'im not leaving u alone when ur sad'im not sad im not anything. im transmasc and she asked if i was having a girlboss moment bc mental health or whatever. 'i can tell youre upset about it' shut up shut up shut up) she says she doesn't want to drive all the way there and a plane would be miserable and she doesnt like theme parks anyways. well now i dont care abt anything. she didnt even want to go she wouldn't even be happy. it wouldn't even be worth it it doesn't matter cuz she doesn't wanna go so now i don't care. its pointless. i want to go because its something to do and it sounds like a nice break from my family but its not gonna be a magical memorable day it never would be because my daydreaming about making jokes on the carousel or admiring the view together on the ferris wheel or winning her a prize are all stupid and pointless. i was an idiot to hope and even stupider to think that anyone would make it happen. im empty rn i don't care really. its been a rollercoaster(hah) of being on top of the world because things would be perfect to being severely depressed because this is pointless and won't work to oh. it didn't matter in the first place. it was never going to be special. it never will be. if i went with my fp and everything was perfect together she wouldn't be comfortable so it's all worthless anyways. she should cancel her trip to see me its a waste of her time and money shes got better things to do and i should go [various sh/suicidal things] . this fucking sucks and im stuck wobbling between apathy and misery and that joy is dead. if i hurt ill at least feel something and ill deserve it. she doesn't even want to go

#borderline vent #fp vent #tw sh #tw self harm #tw suicide

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galaxyies · 2 months

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…

cant fucking sleep tossing and turning multiple nights in a row seething and fuming and so fucking Angry. just pure anger. i havent been remotely this angry in so long, but at least i know what i deserve apparently, because my anger comes from all my frustration of trying to be a good friend and just getting slapped across the face in the end

wanting to kill myself and wanting help, not knowing the right words to say, not Knowing how to ask for help because i never learned that from anyone. and oh right, just remember if you ever feel suicidal, dont tell your friends, because the internet will tell you youre manipulative for it. not only that, but youre just an ungrateful friend if you cant see all the Good Good things. its not like clinical depression will make you lose touch with the things that make you happy or anything. and lets just be real with myself, its always been clinical bud. this darkness has been there since about as long as i can even remember

i was in distress and thats all i could articulate. the loneliness, the frustration, the emptiness day after day, of no one taking me seriously at home. of constantly being ridiculed, mocked, made fun, in the space meant to be comfortable… to be Safe. just sinking further and further into depression. no one caring to ask me how i was, why i was so sad. no one caring about my summer spent learning about conservation, but more importantly, about myself, and about what i want out of life, and out of friendships. no one saying “we missed you!” everyone was nicer while i was away, when things were easy

being told i can stick out the job that was exhausting all of my social and mental capacity. god, if only i could! but i cant, i couldnt. at least not without destroying myself and accepting the husk of a person i was becoming in the process. im lucky my sister is as kind as she is and she took me in. i think i would have stolen my roommates sleeping pills otherwise. i thought about it so many many times

but at least i know now, when things get hard, youll leave. of course, im just too much, too emotional, too volatile while obviously in a state of pure crisis and pain. what i needed was a friend, not a fucking therapist. i needed someone to metaphorically grab my face and say i’ll be okay, things will be okay. its okay to feel lost and empty, but youll be here as my friend. just like i myself had always been there. but no… its too late for that now anyway

#and its okay now #im thankful

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