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#because if this ends the way i'm terrified it will
wolfythewitch · 1 day
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Pspspsps Wolfy, I'm very curious what your thoughts are on the differences between Homeric vs Epic Odysseus. This is an invite to infodump/ramble if you have strong opinions on this
I think the main difference is that it took EPIC!odysseus an entire act to get to where homeric Odysseus is, if that makes sense? Then again iliad odysseus and odyssey odysseus are also pretty different in their own right, but that's probably what you get when putting a man in war (ancient war, where honor and traditions were still upheld) and spooky monster situations (it's apparent from the encounter with polyphemus that this is already Vastly different from home and from troy. the cyclops do not follow xenia, what's to say the others do?)
But again, morality and tradition are still separate things, especially when bringing the gods into it. The law of hospitality is definitely one to respect (iirc it's also a major thing in norse myths) regardless of your philosophy in the importance of human life. It's why the monsters throughout the odyssey are so terrifying, because it present the concept of xenia but all wrong. it takes the rules they live by and bends it every which way. but I digress,
Point is, Odysseus can hold up certain virtues not because they're the moral, kind thing to do, but because it's a way of life (and the best way to not get him or his men killed). He is not immune to murder. In fact, he will murder if the situation calls for it. A lot of his instincts are actually to murder, it's just that he often restrains himself because of consequences. He doesn't derive joy from slaughter (I'd say the war haunts him severely) but it would be wrong to say that he doesn't want to kill, or that he isn't the same as any other soldier on the field in pursuit of glory or fame. He is in fact ruthless in pursuit of his goals. Whatever it takes to win the war. whatever it takes to get him home. whatever it takes to keep him alive. whatever it takes to win him his homecoming and his glory both. He is not a good person. (re: the odyssey)
I'm not saying he doesn't have a shred of goodness in him (he's human after all) but I am saying that it can coexist with his end serves the means attitude. He is human and he wants everything and he gets kicked around island to island for wanting and i love that for him
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ashwhowrites · 2 days
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AHHHH IVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOUR REQUESTS TO OPEN UP!!!!! I’m obsessed with your writing 😩 (I apologize in advanced for my gibberish below for I am VERY high 😂)
Anywho (and you can totally ignore this if it’s not your cup of tea):
Would you possibly do an angst to fluff Eddie x reader fic where maybe instead of reader being the popular one, it was Eddie instead? Like instead of everyone hating on hellfire, they think it’s super cool and so Eddie is super popular and reader is like a quiet nerd. And like reader has a big crush on Eddie and Eddie knows but always makes fun of her for it because of his reputation but he secretly likes her too and then the events of the upside down happen? Like maybe it’s reader who lures the bats away instead of Eddie but Eddie saves the reader before she dies from the bats and he admits that he likes her back and they start dating?
Again, if it’s not your cup of tea you can totally ignore it but you’re the only person I feel like would do something magical with this.
I'm honored you believe I can do something magical with this. I hope I won you over.
I think this might be my favorite Eddie fic to date. I hope everyone enjoys this as much as I do! Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻
⚠️it ends happy and I like the ending. So don't complain in the comments about "she shouldn't have taken him back" it's fiction and sometimes we just want things to work out so for this fic, leave that opinion to yourself. Saying that in the kindest way I can❤️
To die for
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Y/N wasn't the type to hang out with the popular crowd. She kept her distance and didn't interact with anyone. She focused on her studies and getting into the best school offered. No one wanted to stay in Hawkins, and she worked to get her ticket out.
Then she got a little distracted, and she hated to admit it.
Eddie Munson, the leader of hellfire. He was a punk, loved music, and caught the eyes of every girl. Y/N didn't see the attraction until they got paired to do an assignment in music class.
She twiddled her thumbs nervously when he walked over. She inhaled his cologne as he pulled out the chair next to her, his bright smile flashed her way as his cheeks scrunched. He was the only popular kid in music, and she was terrified to be paired with him.
But as they worked together, they talked about themselves. It turned out they had a lot in common. While the assignment was boring research, she couldn't help but be excited to go to music every day. The assignment was a huge part of their grade so the teacher gave them a month's worth of class to work on it. It didn't take more than one class for Y/N to be just as smitten with Eddie.
~~~
"I hate that we couldn't pick which musician to research. Like why can't we do Dio?" Y/N mumbled as she began to write down notes.
Eddie never lifted his head so fast, he looked away from the computer towards Y/N. Her eyes were on her paper.
"You listen to Dio?" Eddie let out a breathy laugh. He was shocked, to say the least. He never thought the cute nerd would listen to a band like that.
"Who doesn't," Y/N laughed, she finished writing the sentence and looked up. She gulped when she noticed Eddie's warm eyes staring at her. A smile of adoration on his face, it made her stomach flip.
"Damn, there's more than just brains and beauty to you, huh?" Eddie joked as he went back to the computer. His words repeated in Y/N's head as she sat stunned. Did he just admit she was pretty?
~~~
Y/N cleaned her room at a rapid pace. Eddie was going to be over any minute and she was terrified. She was positive Eddie had seen the inside of many girl's bedrooms and she did not want to leave a bad impression compared to the rest.
~
"Can we take a break? My eyes hurt." Eddie groaned as he fell back against her soft bed.
"Sure, I'll grab us some water." Y/N offered, as she went out of the room. Eddie stood up, and his socks landed on the soft carpet. He walked around her room. He took in her huge collection of books, many he never heard of before. He looked at her wall of music. Band posters were on the walls and cassettes were neatly placed on a shelf. He had to admit, she had great music taste.
Her closet was cracked open, and Eddie couldn't fight the urge. He cringed as the door creaked as he opened it.
"Pretty girl," Eddie smiled as he grabbed the acoustic guitar that leaned against the wall.
"What are you doing?"
Eddie jumped but kept a tight grip on the neck of the guitar.
"Uh, sorry. I was snooping." Eddie confessed, "You play?"
Y/N blushed at the thought of him snooping, embarrassed of what he found and thought.
"I've always wanted to, but I'm not very good. One of the things I couldn't teach myself." Y/N laughed sadly.
"Sit, I'll teach you," Eddie said, he sat on her bed
"Um, are you sure?"
"Pretty girl in my lap as I teach her the thing I love? Yeah, I'm sure." He smirked as she slowly walked over. She sat the water down on her side table.
She coughed as she sat on the bed, next to him.
"Can't teach you all the way over there," he teased, she swallowed her nerves when he moved behind her. He placed the guitar in her lap and wrapped his arms around her.
"You smell nice," Eddie said against her ear. Y/N felt her tongue go numb, too nervous to respond.
She placed her fingers on the guitar and Eddie's ghosted over hers. She tried to focus on his directions and movements, but his breath hitting her neck sent her somewhere down south.
After an hour, she successfully could play a few chords.
"That a girl," Eddie praised as he placed the guitar to the side. "Unfortunately, I have to go home."
"Oh um yeah, thanks for teaching me," Y/N said shyly as Eddie put on his jacket.
"Pleasure is all mine," Eddie winked.
Y/N stared at the spot where he once stood for what felt like hours.
~~~
After spending a full month together, Y/N didn't want it to end. Their assignment was turned in, and now they didn't have a reason to see each other.
Y/N found a way. She sat on the phone all night trying to win tickets to the Dio concert, on Friday night. She scored the tickets and couldn't wait to tell Eddie the exciting news. She raced through the halls spotted his curly hair and headed his way.
"Eddie!" She said excitedly as she bounced on her feet. She ignored all the friends surrounding him. Her eyes were on his. She felt her excitement dissolve when Eddie's eyes looked panicked. He looked at her and his friends, she swore he looked like he was going to throw up.
"Yo dude, who's this?" one of his friends said as the group laughed and nudged Eddie's arm.
"Some type of little girlfriend?" Another one was added on
Y/N blushed at the thought of being Eddie's girlfriend. It wasn't like she didn't think about it with all the flirting and soft touches.
But Y/N ignored in and continued.
"I scored tickets to Dio! This Friday night, you and me?" She was proud of herself for making it through the sentence without shaking.
Eddie's friends laughed....loud
Their screeches could be heard blocks down from the school. But she kept her focus on Eddie. He stood frozen. He didn't say a word as he stared back at her.
"Oh, how cute. Little nerd has a crush on ya, Munson!"
"Looks like someone has a date on Friday."
"Atta boy, another one on the list."
"I uh..uh" Eddie stuttered
"Do you think he's actually going to say yes?"
The crowd around them got bigger as the school watched.
Y/N felt his friend's words stab her in the chest. Now she felt like she wanted to throw up. Her eyes watered as she looked around, everyone was staring and waiting for Eddie's reaction.
"Are you going to say something?" She meant it as a question, but it sounded like a plea. Like she was pleading him to tell them they were wrong and that they had something. That their moments meant something to him.
Y/N saw the Eddie she knew disappear in his eyes, and she knew he was going to land the final blow. She stepped back as she tried to brace herself.
"Do I know you?" Eddie asked, he pretended to look confused as his friends laughed.
"Eddie, don't," she whimpered, but it didn't matter. It was popularity or her, and she knew it wasn't a fighting chance.
"Look, sweetheart. I am flattered, but there is no way in hell I'd ever go out with you." Eddie smirked as his friends nudged him and they all fist-bumped behind his back.
Y/N didn't say a word, she nodded sadly and turned around. She pushed through the crowd as the tears slipped down.
"Oh, poor baby is even crying!" A girl's voice announced, then laughs followed.
Y/N shoved the tickets in the trash before she ran out.
Eddie was dead to her.
~
Eddie gulped as she raced off. His friends still hyped him up as he felt the hallways closing in on him. He stepped forward as she threw the tickets in the trash, but he stopped.
He felt guilty, he felt so fucking guilty. He wanted more than anything to spend his Friday night singing along to his favorite band with the cutest girl he'd ever met. To hold her hand as they walked in, to dance like idiots during their favorite song, and to talk about it for days after.
But he panicked. He wasn't supposed to like someone like her.
~~~
After Y/N embarrassed herself in front of the whole school, her life went to hell.
She couldn't walk in the halls without people laughing and pointing.
She dreaded music class. She kept her head down whenever she walked in, she felt his eyes burn into her. But she refused to look in his direction. She should have known Eddie would only like her behind her bedroom door. She should have known he was incapable of liking her shamelessly.
The cafeteria was loud as Y/N walked to her table, Robin was already sitting and picking at her lunch.
"Hey Y/N!"
Y/N looked over her shoulder, she groaned when she realized it was coming from Eddie's table.
"Turns out Eddie does wanna see Dio!"
Y/N looked to Eddie who kept his head down. She looked back at his friend confused.
"Just with a hot cheerleader, not you!"
The table erupted in laughter as she bit her lip. She knew Eddie wouldn't speak up so she turned around and walked to her table.
"I'm sorry they are dicks," Robin said as Y/N sat down.
"It's whatever." Y/N shrugged
"Um Y/N?"
Y/N looked up and was shocked to see Eddie standing there. She looked behind him and noticed his table was watching.
"Yeah?" She asked quietly, it hurt to even look at him.
"I'm so sorry for everything," he whispered.
"Is it like a trap?" she asked confused, as she suspiciously looked back at his table.
"No, I just re-"
"Whatcha doing here, lover boy?" Eddie's friend appeared next to him.
"I was...umm" Eddie nervously stuttered, the panic in his body again. He looked at Y/N's sad face and back to his friend's accusing one.
"Not trying to talk her up, are you?" His friend asked with a chuckle.
"No, of course not! I was just telling her to stop calling me. Chick won't leave me alone." Eddie faked laughed. His friend seemed to believe him, laughing with him, as they walked back to their table.
Eddie looked over his shoulder and mouthed "Sorry" but Y/N rolled her eyes.
~~~
Even if Eddie agreed to go to the concert, he wouldn't have been able to go.
Instead of sulking in his room about his poor decisions, he was stuck in the upside down.
"Dustin and Eddie you go to the trailer and lure them to you. Then the second the bats come, get back inside the trailer. Do not come out!" Steve said, his finger pointed at Dustin.
The group went to their positions and prayed their plan would work.
~
"QUICK WE NEED TO CREATE MORE NOISE TO LURE THE BATS AWAY FROM EDDIE AND DUSTIN!" Steve screamed.
"I KNOW WHAT TO DO!" Robin yelled as she grabbed the radio.
~
A panicked Dustin screamed over the radio as the bats began to chip parts of the trailer away. Eddie tried to swallow his fear but he knew this was it. He lived his life, did he have any regrets? So damn many.
He hated that he couldn't fix things with Y/N. He hated that she wouldn't get the closure she deserved, she wouldn't get the apology Eddie had been practicing for weeks.
If he knew his life was going to end so short, he wouldn't have wasted it on popularity. He would have picked her.
Eddie closed his eyes as he felt the cold air rush in, the bats were loud as they began to swarm into the trailer. He cried out as the bats clawed and nipped at his skin. He yelled for Dustin to run and not stop.
Eddie wasn't sure who to pray to but he did. He prayed as his clothes were torn and he felt blood rushing down his chest.
Then suddenly, the bats stopped.
A loud ring of music began to blast, Eddie knew he left his guitar on the top, and the sound wasn't coming from it.
The bats raced out and chased the sound.
"Who's doing that?" Dustin asked
"I have no idea. You okay?" Eddie asked, checking on him before he grabbed his weapons.
"Yes. Let's go!" Dustin said as he climbed out of the trailer.
Along with the bats, Eddie and Dustin raced. Eddie ran as fast as he could and Dustin jumped on his bike.
Eddie ignored all the pain he felt as he kept running. As he got closer, he realized it wasn't a song. It was the same few chords over and over.
And Eddie knew those chords.
Eddie felt even more panic in his chest as he guessed who was playing it. In a selfish way, he hoped it was someone else. It was wrong but he prayed it was someone in the group, and not her.
"WHO IS THAT?" Dustin screamed as he threw down his bike and prepared his weapons.
"It's Y/N," Eddie gulped as his eyes took in the sight of Y/N playing the guitar. She didn't have any protection, simply standing in her normal clothes as she risked herself for everyone stuck in the upside down.
For a second, everything was silent. The guitar stopped. Eddie's eyes caught hers. Both stared at each other as time slowed.
"I FORGIVE YOU!" Y/N screamed, the tears flowed down her cheeks as she threw the guitar to the ground.
"NO!" Eddie screamed, but it was too late. The bats already found her. Her body was taken to the ground as she screamed in horror.
"GET HELP!" Eddie screamed at Dustin, he didn't look back at him. He just ran to her.
He started swinging everywhere, he heard thuds and screeches. Eddie used every ounce of anger and hurt that his body held as motivation to swing the shit out of these blood suckers. The agony screams coming from Y/N's lips made him move faster.
Dustin called for help on the radio, he wasn't going to leave them alone. He quickly joined Eddie and began to swing.
Eddie didn't have time to yell at him, in the moment he was grateful the kid didn't listen to him. Together they cleared the path towards her. Eddie thought he felt the greatest amount of fear, but when her screams stopped he knew he was wrong.
~
Y/N felt like she finally caught her breath. She gasped as her eyes opened. Bright white lights shined above her that caused her to shut them again.
"Y/N?" She heard a relieved voice say then a warm hand intertwined with hers.
She slowly opened her eyes, a familiar brown eyes looked back at her. He was covered in dirt, blood stained clothes but he still was the prettiest man she'd ever seen.
"Hm, even in heaven you look the same." She said, her voice cracking with every word.
Eddie laughed and grabbed some water. He softly put it against her lips and helped her lift her head to drink.
"Well you haven't made it there yet." Eddie joked. "You had all of us scared."
Y/N looked around the room, but no one else was there. "You are the only one here."
Eddie scratched his head, "they were, but the nurse said only one person at a time, and well I called dibs for six hours." He said as he looked at his watch.
"Why?" She asked, from what she's learned he wanted nothing to do with her.
"I know it's incredibly hard to believe, but I have feelings for you. I know I've been a dick to you and I'm sorry for all the pain I caused. It's pathetic that it took you nearly dying to grow balls and be honest. But before you showed up, I was positive I was going to die. And all I thought about in that moment was how you deserved an apology and that I regretted not taking my chance with you." Eddie confessed. His hands were still in hers as he sat on the chair next to her bed. His eyes were red, and his cheeks were wet.
"It is pathetic, Munson." Y/N snapped, but she kept her hands in his. His touch was warm and soft, a feeling that reminded her she was still alive.
Her heart wanted to hug him and cry. But her head wanted her to keep her pride and tell him to fuck off.
"Did you mean it? When you said you forgave me?" Eddie choked out, sniffling back his tears.
"I prepared to die and I didn't want to ruin your life even more." Y/N confessed, sadness flood through her body as she remembered how worthless she felt because of him. He was the only person in her life that made her feel loved, but hated at the same time. In the end, that was the only experience she had with love and she was okay to die with that in mind because at least it was someone she'd die for.
"You never ruined my life!" Eddie promised, his wet lips kissed her hand as he sobbed. "You are a gift in my life, okay? I've never felt so happy around someone and so alive. I'm an idiot and I made all the wrong decisions. But I swear on my life, I'll make this up to you if you give me a chance. I love you."
Y/N snapped her head as she felt her heart race. The machine gave it away as it beeped.
"You love me?" She whispered, tears flowing down her face as she looked into his eyes.
The Eddie she knew was behind them.
"So damn much. I know I don't deserve anything and I definitely don't deserve you. But I'll do it all right this time. It'll be us and that's all I want."
"Is that why you saved me?" She choked out, she remembered his arms carrying her as he screamed for help. The fear in his eyes and the panic in his voice. He didn't have to come save her, but he did.
"The second I heard those chords, my heart fell out of my chest and my only goal was to get to you before the bats did. I'm very angry with Robin for putting you in that position, but she knew you'd do it to save me. And you deserve someone who'd save you back."
Y/N didn't say anything, she unlaced her hand from Eddie's. He tried to ignore the disappointment he felt.
She sat up slowly then placed her hands on Eddie's cheeks, before he knew it, she leaned in and smashed her lips on his. He felt his stomach flip a thousand times as he reached forward to hold her waist. He kissed her back with everything he had left in him. The kiss tasted of blood and dirt, but it was the best kiss he's ever had.
After a few moments, she pulled away and gasped for air. Eddie leaned his forehead against hers, his eyes still closed as he tried to memorize the feeling of her lips on his.
"I love you too." She whispered, before her lips attached to his again.
Eddie meant everything he said. He was going to prove he was worthy of her and her love.
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662607015 · 2 days
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i've been too busy to post about it lately but the current situation surrounding disability rights in the uk is horrifying in a way that most people have zero awareness of. i would appreciate it if more people could spread awareness of this, because the situation is dire to the point that the united nations have officially recognised it as a human rights violation, and there is still little to no discussion about this present online that i'm aware of.
on march 22 this year, the united nations published a follow-up report - found here - on its 2016 inquiry into the human rights of disabled people in the uk. the original inquiry found "grave and systemic violations" of the human rights of disabled people, and the follow-up concludes that no significant progress has been made concerning the situation. the report details "deep poverty" becoming increasingly common for disabled people; media rhetoric "aimed at raising hostility against welfare claimants, including disabled people"; increasing rates of institutionalisation of disabled people; concern about ai tools being used to automate fraud detection in social security with little oversight; and reports of "benefit deaths": the phenomenon of disabled people resorting to suicide after having their social security removed by the state, which has evidently become so common that they have a name for it.
on april 19, just 28 days after the un's official condemnation, the uk government published a new press release announcing a "moral mission" to "reform" our disability welfare system - meaning plans to even further reduce or entirely remove what little finanical support is available to disabled people, in addition to removing the ability of gps to issue sick notes and the introduction of a "fraud bill" which would enable warrants for seizes, searches and arrests in addition to increased digital surveillance of any welfare claimant suspected of fraud. again, this comes less than a month after the un announced that the uk has taken no action to address human rights abuses of disabled people - and the only action they're taking on this is to actively make the situation worse. i don't know how to end this post other than that it's legitimately terrifying to be a disabled person here at present, and this is made even worse by how little media attention the situation is getting - if you're able to speak out about this, please do. the human rights of disabled people are being violated and our government needs to be held accountable.
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rayshippouuchiha · 1 day
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So, I keep thinking about the Kyouya-nii AU (which is starting to take up residence in my mind), and I keep thinking about two specific things in particular
One - I am unable to think about it without imagining the sunniest, most joyful littol child walking behind his "Awesome Kyouya-nii!" during patrol and thinking (or talking) about how he's the "Coolest brother ever!" while Kyouya has that scowl. Just, the contrast. Scary, and the adorable that's secretly scary
Two - I keep wondering how Kyouya met Izuku, because unless he has some internal feral potential detector (which, I would not put it past him) he probably would have needed to see something that showed off that potential. Like, you know how in the first episode of MHA we see kiddie Izuku getting between those bully brats and the kid they were bullying? I'm wondering if it was something like that.
Also, you have gotten me obsessed with KHR even though I'm very likely never gonna watch or read it
See no this is exactly what I'm going for with this AU.
Hibari sees Izuku stand up to some bullies and is like "nice' and then he sees Izuku spear tackle someone and he's like "Nice" and then the kid gets up all bloody and bruised after getting his ass kicked and just pats himself on the cheeks all "next time I'll go for the knees cause his quirk makes his joints weak" and he's like "Wao" and decides that this small animal is adorable and obviously needs a stronger predator to help it grow into its fangs.
And, well, what better carnivore is there out there than him?
Which of course means that Hibari basically grabs Izuku by the back of his shirt, drags him to ta clearing, and starts educating him in the fine art of ass-kicking. Which then ends up with Izuku crying all over him when Hibari gives him his very own training tonfa and decides that Izuku's obviously far enough along to come with him to hunt down rule breakers on his patrols.
So everyone gets treated to the terrifying sight of Hibari strolling through town with the most adorable little green child trailing after him, spouting praise and just chattering on and on. And there are a few people who are Big Worried about this kid because it's Hibari, ya know?
But then someone sees Hibari beat a thug only halfway down and then step back and nudge the Izuku forward. And before anyone can stop him, because holy shit dude what the fuck that's an entire BABY, Izuku whips out his training tonfa and finishes fucking this thug all the way up.
And Hibari just kind of smiles with his body but not his face, pats the kid on the head 1 time, and then they move on.
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shuttershocky · 2 days
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What do you think of Nasu basically spoiling Mahoyo 2 in FGO, even though Mahoyo 2 doesn't exist (yet)?
lol
lmao even
I will make an even better call.
He did not stop at spoiling Mahoyo 2, a VN that doesn't exist in any way, shape, or form yet. No. In fact, Nasu has gone above and beyond, also spoiling a critical new story element for the Tsukihime Remake's Red Garden, hidden inside the Mahoyo event.
Why do I say this? There's a scene in the collab event where the gang discusses the matter of reviving the dead. Aoko's little incident at the end of Mahoyo inevitably gets brought up, but Alice shuts down the notion that Aoko can revive the dead, because what Aoko does is time fraud, essentially running a scam, and therefore does not count.
If you are killed, but Aoko makes it so you don't die, she does so by taking the time you were killed and propelling it into the far future, way after you would die of old age anyway. In Mahoyo, Touko is aghast at the methodology because messing with time would absolutely incur some kind of terrible debt to the fabric of reality that will have to be paid eventually, while in FGO, Alice believes it doesn't count as reviving the dead, probably because you never died (because the time that you died is far, far sway).
What does this have to do with Tsukihime?
Now, in the original Tsukihime, Shiki was basically a dead man walking; his body was animated by Akiha's life-force / soul after saving her from an inverting SHIKI, and while it's never explained beyond "Akiha has powers no one else in her oni family has", no mage has been able to revive the dead, or keep a body that can no longer live on its own moving by making it a parasite on their own life. Others that cheat death such as Touko or Roa (or Meltryllis in FGO) move bodies instead, they cannot save a body that has been damaged beyond saving.
Only Aoko and Akiha have done that.
Now, we know due to some bad ends in the Tsukihime Remake that Shiki is still unknowingly dependent on Akiha, because she's able to control his life and even make him pass out by cutting him off (at least until he gets possessed by Roa), BUT we don't know if the accident with SHIKI was the only thing that happened in the past.
The Tsukihime Remake no longer takes place in Misaki town like the original did. This means that Shiki no longer encounters Aoko walking around her home town. She would have had to go to a hospital in Souya town, and coincidentally run into 9 year old Shiki terrified of seeing death everywhere.
I don't buy that their meeting was a coincidence anymore. I think Aoko knew he would be there.
There is now an unexplained gap between when Roa was Elesia, and when he was SHIKI. In the original timeline, Elesia would have been born around 1975 and fully overwritten by Roa when she was 16, or at 1991. If Arcueid killed her quickly, Roa would have had to find a new host fast, and the incident with SHIKI happened in 1992, 8 years before the events of Tsukihime. No gap.
But now, Arcueid defeats the possessed Elesia in 2001, and the incident with SHIKI doesn't happen until 2006 (8 years before the events of the Tsukihime Remake in 2014). There's now a 5 year gap.
Now, Nasu might just be really bad at mathing out his timeline, but based on entirely no evidence whatsoever, I'm gonna say the 5 year gap between Roa's victims is intentional.
Roa had one more victim in between Elesia and SHIKI, which would be Shiki himself, way before Shiki would gain the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception.
Roa got confused. He meant to target Tohno SHIKI, heir to the powerful Tohno family, and instead got Tohno Shiki, their child slave whose family name got replaced. Roa goes wild inside a Nanaya's body, but ends up running into Aoko (who we know due to Melty Blood Type-Lumina that she has orders from the Clock Tower to defeat and interrogate Roa), who gives him the fuck you laser and incinerates Roa in an instant. Roa gets told by Dr Arach (who is obviously a fucking vampire) that he had the wrong Shiki all this time, while Aoko uses her bullshit to restore Shiki himself.
Unlike with Ciel, whose soul is now "Roa" and thus became immortal because she cannot die while Roa is still recognized by the World as alive, Aoko's method of reviving the dead doesn't heal them of death, she just magics all that shit away.
This makes Shiki avoid the magic loophole that Ciel gets trapped in, becoming an ordinary boy again with no vampiric connection (because Aoko made the whole incident never happen).
That distinction is important, because not dying when being killed is why Shiki has the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception in the first place. He experienced death and his mind now comprehends its true nature. Aoko reviving him doesn't trigger it because like Alice says, Aoko doesn't revive the dead.
Akiha on the other hand, triggers it because Shiki was mortally wounded and his life can no longer move his body, instead relying on Akiha's life force to survive. This makes Shiki dead but functionally alive, manifesting the mystic eyes of death perception.
When Aoko heard that the little boy she unkilled somehow managed to die again just a little later only to reawaken at the hospital, she had to come and see him for herself, leading to that fateful meeting outside the hospital.
TL;DR - Mahoyo event spoils that Roa in the Remake timeline switches it up, possessing Shiki first before ever touching SHIKI, which Aoko deals with.
_____
I have zero proof about any of this by the way which is why it sounds like complete bullshit, because it is. I just saw an opportunity to post Tsukihime Remake speculation on a barely related topic and ran away with it.
BUT, consider this: I correctly predicted that in the Remake Arcueid route, Roa would see a skull staring at him when he finally realizes Shiki is "Death". I know what Nasu plans for Tsukihime, it is all revealed to me in my dreams.
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mothandpidgeon · 1 day
Text
While the Baby Sleeps (demon!Ezra x f!reader)
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pairing: demon!Ezra x f!reader (mom!reader)
rating: E! 18+!
wc: 2.6k
summary: The only way to get your baby to sleep through the night is making a deal with an unholy creature. But, of course, there are consequences...
tags: dark fic, Dub/non con (making a deal with a demon), breastfeeding, nursing, lactation kink, mommy kink? (but not like that), stretch marks, oral sex, unprotected p in v, overstimulation, horns, Ezra is a sex demon, moth never uses y/n
an: Here is my submission to #MothandBirdMothersDayChallenge! Actually this fic is the reason why I wanted to do this challenge. Sometimes when I'm in the dark nursery in the middle of the night, I have fun intrusive thoughts like 'What if there was a shadowy figure in the doorway?' To combat how terrifying that thought is, I took it and made it horny. Thank you @ezrasbirdie for betaing this, helping me do this Mother's Day Challenge, and all around being a cool auntie to my fics and baby Moth.
 ...
He wakes you every night. It doesn’t matter what you try. Your son hasn't let you have more than three consecutive hours of sleep since he was born. 
You’re at your wit’s end. 
Every time you look in the mirror you see a hollowed out version of yourself with dark bags under your eyes. You make yourself coffee without putting grounds into the filter. You fly into a tearful rage when you spill a bottle of precious milk. You don’t know who you are anymore. 
Tonight’s no different. You lift your crying baby from his crib. Rock him, shush him. You sit with him in the glider and try to nurse him back to sleep. It’s all done bleary-eyed, half asleep. Everything is these days. 
You’d give anything for this baby to sleep. 
Just as the thought crosses your mind, you look up to see a figure standing just outside the nursery. It’s shadowy against the dark of the hallway, shades of gray on black. From the height and broad shoulders, it could be a man. He stands abnormally still. Silent, watching. You think it’s just a trick of your sleep deprived mind until he moves just slightly and a patch of silver hair is caught in the moonlight. 
You must be dreaming because if there was a man in your baby’s room, you’d be terrified. And you’re not. You feel calm like you’re floating on steady waters. 
“Who are you?” you ask. Your voice drifts like a lullaby. 
He doesn’t respond, just leans in the doorway. All that you can make out is that blonde hair and two eyes that glint at you.
“I’ve come to help you, petal,” he finally says. His voice is warm and melodic.
You feel yourself nodding off for a moment. When you blink yourself awake, he’s by your side.
You can make out his features better now. Dark stubble covers a handsome face. The sharp angles of his nose and jaw are silhouetted in the dim. You smell woodsmoke and frankincense as he comes near. He kneels beside the chair and his brow furrows as he looks up at you.
“You need that child to rest,” he says. 
You nod pathetically. You can feel familiar tears well in your eyes. Hopeless, helpless. Desperate. 
“I can be of assistance,” he says. 
“Don’t hurt him,” you say, holding your son a bit closer to your chest.  Your baby might be torturing you in the night but you love him. You won’t let anything happen to him. Even though you’re sure you’re dreaming, you remember old fairy tales, creatures that try to trick and deceive. This man isn’t human, you know that somewhere deep inside you. 
“Wouldn’t dream of it. I won’t even touch him. It’s not the babe that’s piqued my interest. It’s his mother,” he explains. His obsidian eyes are on your lips, pink tongue darts out to lick his own. 
“Don’t hurt me either,” you say, though there’s no fight in your words. 
“That’s not my intention at all. Quite the opposite. You’re so beautiful, petal,” he coos, brushing his knuckles across your jawline. 
It must be a dream because you haven’t felt beautiful in a long time. Your body’s been stretched and broken, engorged and swollen. Your hair falls out by the handful. Your breasts reek of sweat and milk, a sickly funk. 
“I want you. Carnally,” he says.  
The growl in his voice makes warmth pool between your thighs. He looks at you like something divine, an awe over his features. His light touch moves down your neck and over your collarbone sending goosebumps over your skin. You’ve forgotten what it’s like to feel anything other than exhausted, touched in a way that isn’t a demand for food or comfort. 
“Let me have that and that boy will slumber like an angel,” he promises. He watches your baby suckling himself back to sleep.
It sounds so good. Suddenly the only thing you want more than a a night’s sleep is for this stranger to pleasure you, to be inside of you. You haven’t felt desire in just about as long as you haven’t slept. You’ve barely been able to shower and feed yourself let alone take care of your own needs.
“Put the child in his cot and go to bed. Tomorrow I’ll come for you and you’ll see,” he says.
“Who are you?” you ask again.
“I’m Ezra,” he whispers.
You wake up in your bed the next morning and you’ve slept like the dead.
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That strange dream haunts you but you think of it as nothing more than that. When you put your son down to sleep the next night, you don’t expect any miracles. He goes down easily enough, a nice little fluke, and you decide to turn in early yourself. 
Its nearly midnight when you wake up but you realize it’s quiet. The baby isn’t crying for you. You glance at the monitor and see that he’s sleeping soundly, sucking away at this pacifier. Just as Ezra promised. 
Relief floods your veins. You put your head back against the pillow and your eyes drift close. As you begin to return to sleep, there’s a shift in the bed and you catch that earthy scent again. You gasp when you see Ezra’s black eyes. He’s beside you, the pad of his thumb tracing the plump of your lower lip. His chest is a wide golden plane littered with white scars, dusted with dark hairs. 
“Hush, petal,” he says. “I’ve kept my promise. And now I’ve come to ravish you.”
You want to tell him that you’re tired. You finally have the opportunity to go back to sleep and you shouldn’t let anything come between you and that sweet rest. But the same, strong want that you felt the night before is calling you. An ache runs between your legs up to where Ezra’s hand glides over the delicate skin on your pulse. You're powerless to stop your own desire from sabotaging the one thing you’ve wanted.
A languid sigh leaves you as you melt into his touch. 
Ezra sucks at your neck. You’ll have a black and blue mark from his teeth but the sensation is so delicious, you can’t bring yourself to care. 
He opens your legs and notches his hips between yours. The friction of his hard cock against your panties makes your back arch. 
“I want to taste you,” he says. 
He rucks up the ratty old t-shirt that you sleep in along with the nursing bra that’s constantly saturated with leaking milk. He takes a long moment to savor the sight of you so exposed, a smile twitching on his lips. A long, low growl leaves him as he slithers down your body, gathering your breasts in his big hands and bringing his face to nuzzle in your skin.
You hear him inhale deeply, taking in your scent. The stubble of his cheek scratches at your sensitive flesh. One thick finger circles your peaked nipple nice and slow. Your body responds— a bead of milk seeps out and rolls down to the valley between your breasts.
Your breath catches at the mix of sensations. Your cheeks heat and you can’t help the embarrassment that creeps up your spine. Much to your surprise, Ezra’s eyes widen with interest. He lowers himself and  traces the wet trail with the flat of his tongue. You can only imagine what he tastes– the musk of your sweat beneath sweet milk. It seems that he likes it. He closes his lips around your nipple and lavishes it with his tongue, groaning into your flesh. 
“Shit,” you gasp. 
You feel the tingle of letdown behind your breasts, his ministrations summoning more milk. Soon Ezra is drinking from you, grunting and rutting his hips against you. The other, neglected nipple weeps milk and he pauses to lap it up greedily. You tangle your hand into his hair and that’s when you feel it. There’s a raised bump amidst his curls but it’s hard as bone. It sits just above his forehead and stands only an inch high. As your fingers rake through his hair, you find another. Horns.
The terror you expect never comes. He might be something ungodly and all you feel is a building excitement. Everything about this is wrong but the world feels upside down. 
He comes away, his plush bottom lip glistening with pearlescent milk. It’s a sight that should repulse you but in the delirium of sleeplessness and lust, it just makes you hungry.
“You are an exquisite creature,” he purrs. 
His flat palm skates down your belly where you’re middle still holds baby weight, a reminder that your body is no longer your own. He peels your panties down your thighs. You feel the fine edges of his teeth against your skin. He penetrates you with two exquisitely thick fingers. No warning but you hardly need it— you’re already slick. 
You keen, back arching off of the mattress, and the sensation is doubled when he puts his lips to your clit and sucks with the same enthusiasm he had at your breast. His wide shoulders spread your knees to make room for his body. You drown in pleasure, a heady mixture of fire doused in the thick pool of sleepiness. Floating, sinking, cresting on a wave as he licks and spreads you open, presses in deep and coils you tight. It’s hard to believe your body can have such strong responses when you’re barely function in your waking life. Something primal drives you on and Ezra knows just how to unlock it. 
“Such a delicacy. To sup on milk and cunt,” he says, barely taking his lips from you. 
The swirls and undulations of his tongue and the sweet pressure inside works you into a frenzy. Your breath shortens and then stops altogether, your thighs tighten and you hold your eyes shut, listening to the whimpers and moans between your legs. It’s too much and not enough. 
When you come undone, it’s a rush of ecstasy that you want to live in forever. Rolling and gushing and sighing. You choke and arch, your entire body convulsing. Your spine clenches up like you’ve been struck by lighting and the electricity runs out through your fingertips and toes. 
“Such a glorious vision,” he muses as you come down, panting and shivering. 
Ezra’s eyes are fixated on you, pupils blown so wide they’re nearly black. He looks like he wants to devour you. 
You share his hunger. You want more already. You’ve just had a feast and yet you’re starving again. 
You see Ezra’s cock now for the first time. Thick and upright, it’s tip, flushed and red. He takes it in his fist, glazing his shaft in your release. There’s something animalistic about it that floods you with another wave of arousal. 
“More,” you manage to say. 
“Not too tired?” he teases with a wicked smile. 
You shake your head. How can you sleep when your body is on fire with lust?
“I’ll fill each needy hole,” he says. 
You whine. He lines himself at your entrance. 
“You’re a goddess. And I’m going to defile you.”
You're filled to the hilt. The noise that escapes him is animalistic and his eyes lose focus. You’re already fluttering around him, already so close to another climax. He fucks you, the stretch and rhythm making you dizzy. 
“This is the closest I’ll get to heaven, I fear,” he revels. “But what could be more divine than this sweet cunt?”
Each word that falls from his lips seems to stroke at your core. His hips drive into you, hands greedily paw at every soft part of your body. 
The only thing that quiets his debauched ramblings is suckling at your breast. Your senses are completely overwhelmed. Tears prick in your eyes as your insides tighten, another orgasm shattering through you. You bite down on his shoulder to keep yourself quiet. 
“Let me hear,” he demands. “He won’t wake.”
And so you do, crying out as you clench around his thickness, losing all control of your body. 
“That’s it, petal. That’s it,” he says. 
He goes on thrusting and pins you down, torturing that exquisite spot deep inside of you over and over again. You’re not sure where one climax ends and another begins but you’re possessed. 
“If only I could fill that womb, sire one after the other to keep you round,” he grunts. 
Ezra swears. He hisses out words in a language you don’t recognize. It sounds like an incantation. 
You hardly have time to make sense of it. He’s pulling out of you, grinding his wet length against your thigh and spilling hot ropes onto your mound. 
You lay beneath him, boneless and dazed. The exhaustion flushes over your weak body. You sense Ezra at your breast again as your eyes drift closed. 
The next thing you know, your baby is crying and it’s morning. 
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It must be a dream. There’s no other way to explain it— a horned creature slipping in and out of your bedroom in the middle of the night, fucking you senseless when you have no energy left. But you wake up with come drying where he marked you. 
That night, he’s back again. 
And again after that. 
“Ezra, I’m exhausted," you breathe. "Please.”
“Isn’t this what you wanted, petal?”
Now your son sleeps soundly through the night while you are awake, debauched for hours without end. 
He’s insatiable and somehow you are, too. 
He fucks you until you’re raw. Your legs quiver and burn from being parted so wide. Your pussy feels battered and bruised. You beg him to fuck your ass just to give your cunt some rest. 
And although your body feels like it can’t take another second of pleasure, though it begs for a moment’s peace, every time he comes to you, you’re flooded with arousal. 
When you try to steal an afternoon nap, he’s there, cock already standing in his fist. 
Spittle dribbles from the corners of your lips as he fucks your mouth. It runs down your chest, your knees already bruised from the hours you’ve spent on them. You try to chase your own relief, grinding your hips against the floor. He pulls you by the ears to sink deeper down your throat. 
He grunts and moans and howls as he comes between your lips. 
He doesn’t always take. 
The next time he makes you come four times. 
“Again, again,” he chants into your ear. His words are hot breath as his fingers press inside of you overwhelming that ridge that sends you reeling. Your bodies are pressed together, sticky with perspiration and release and drool and milk. 
“I can’t,” you sob, your body sore and stretched to its limit. 
You’re so spent, so overstimulated, each orgasm takes more and more effort. But Ezra refuses to quit, punishing you until you reach a fearsome crescendo. 
“Oh, my petal, but I know you are more than capable.”
He’s right. You can feel the weak muscles in your core begin to twist. You hold your breath and focus on the brutal sensations Ezra gives you. 
“Besides, your ability is immaterial,” he goes on. “These were the terms of our deal. This cunt. Is. Mine.”
Despite the fact that you’re so exhausted you can barely remember your own name, hardly able to stand on your own two feel, the climax that hits you is just as monumental as the very first. 
“Have you endured enough tonight, petal?” he asks, sucking the gush of slick off of his fingers. 
“Please,” you whimper. “Please.”
You’re not sure if you’re begging him to stop or to keep going. 
“Tomorrow, petal,” he promises. “Now get some rest.”
He wakes you. Every night. 
...
Comments and reblogs are appreciated! My asks are always open and I don't bite (unless you're into that).
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WIBTA for not telling my partner about the other people I'm with when I plan to break up with him soon?
I (19) and my partner (18) have been together for a few years. We are polyamorous, to be clear. His only thing is that he wanted me to let him know & let him meet any new partners of mine. However, for the past year and a half or so, he's barely been around. I'm lucky if I get to talk to him for maybe an hour per month. So in the past 4-ish months since I have had other people ask me out, I haven't gotten to tell him much more than letting him meet 1 of them and telling him there was others I wanted him to meet. And even there, I'm not entirely sure he got the memo that these were my *partners* and not just people I was close to.
However, I know this relationship isn't going to last longer. From the beginning, my friends, other partners (not the same as the ones I am currently with, although my other current partners also hate him) , and family + therapist have said my relationship is not healthy or even abusive and want me to leave him. But I never had the strength to walk away. I loved, and still love him, too much. He's made it clear that if I left, he would be completely alone, and feel isolated. That's not something I want to do to him. On top of that, although he hasn't done it in several years now, at the beginning of our relationship he would regularly tell me how finding me saved him from suicide, how he would be gone without having found me. Treated me like I was his reason for surviving. I know he didn't mean that in a bad way, but it still stuck with me, and a part of me worries for what will happen if I leave. Plus, he knows everything about me. I don't believe he would, but I know if he wanted to he could easily make my life hell, and that makes it terrifying to try to walk away from him.
So I'm not sure when we actually will break up. Just that we will. He's talked about breaking up himself before, but when I suggested we just get it over with since clearly neither of us where happy in this relationship, he said it "wasn't time yet". So I'm just kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Which makes me worry I'll be the asshole and cheating on him if I avoid telling him about my other relationships because I know ours is going to end. It feels heavy to tell him, between knowing we aren't going to keep being together, and the fact that he never reacts well to my other partners. Despite insisting he's okay with my polyamory and my relationships when I ask, he seems to almost always act aggressively when he meets my other partners. He acts rude towards them, and very possessive about me, often even siting how he was "here first". That's not something I want to put my partners through, especially not for someone I know is going to break up with me. Plus, a part of me feels guilty. Even though it's not going against boundaries, and I do really love all the people I'm with and do everything I can to make sure they all know that and feel loved and respected by me, it feels like I'm doing something wrong by being with so many people at once. It makes me feel ashamed to face my partner and go "hey so I'm with all these people too now! They all asked me out within the past 4-5 ish months yeah!" and like I'll have to find a way to justify it otherwise it'll look like I don't take our relationship seriously and am cheating.
WIBTA?
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comradekatara · 3 days
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i read somewhere that, after the war, zuko at least hands hama over to the swt instead of keeping her in fire nation prisons 'till the end of her life. Which is nice, I think. But I'm also curious as to how that would work out.
Most notably: how do you think it'd go down if she were to meet Pakku? given they both have some sort of connection to kanna's life, the idea of them being forced to interact even once entertains me very much. like, old waterbending master pakku—white lotus member—who has grown up in a patriarchal society and actively forbidden women from training to fight, under the precedent they are somehow ontologically weaker, fragile, and belonging in the healing huts... THAT guy, meeting his former fiancé's old friend: (or current wife's if you go by canon, which, eugh) A woman who not only fought in the front lines but ended up becoming one of the most skilled, creative, and deadly waterbenders in history. How would he react when finding out that a woman came up with blood bending? How badly would Hama mind-fuck him?? Because I'm confident they'd hate each other's guts-- no way she'd tolerate him,,,
And on a similar note—how would Kanna feel upon reuniting wirh Hama and discovering what she put Katata through, in your opinion? Idk, I'm just full of puppetmaster thoughts today. Hama is incredibly interesting and I wish she wasn't handled so much like a Halloween Specisl creepy witch, (even though katara herself is handled and written pretty well in this episode, i think. but i digress.)
i mean obviously i think about this all the time. i personally think that zuko hands hama over to the swt upon katara's request, and she and aang personally deliver her on appa (sokka is not there, for the very deliberate reason that if he knew what they were doing he would very vocally disapprove). and so katara is sort of retraumatizing herself by doing this, but she also feels like it's necessary specifically because she needs to be able to look hama in the eye and tell her why they're not actually the same (especially now that she actually did bloodbend someone in cold blood). katara has the love and support and safety to step back from her anger and her pain and her grief and hang onto her own humanity and allow herself to be the bigger person even in moments of abject rage and acute trauma, and hama doesn't. hama is a victim of her circumstance, and that's part of what makes her so uniquely terrifying to katara, because katara has that same capacity to make people hurt, she has the same tools at her disposal, and she has the same justifications to exercise that power. but unlike hama, she hasn't actually been pushed past her limits. sometimes she can see the cliff's edge, and sometime she even teeters on the line, but hama was fully just shoved off without a parachute, and that's really what separates them above all. i think katara should be allowed to acknowledge that and forgive herself for that, even if hama doesn't directly apologize to her (although in my mind she does, and it's not enough, but it's also so much more than katara ever expected to hear). even if it is too late for hama, katara deserves to heal.
frankly, i don't really give a shit about pakku or his reaction to hama. i also don't actually think that he thinks woman are ontologically incapable of being talented waterbenders of whatever; he's a pretty worldly guy, the reason he clings to these traditions isn't born of the belief that they're grounded in logical evidence like sokka's is, it's because he believes in the preservation of a system that benefits and valorizes him. pakku thinks katara belongs in the healing huts because he comes from a culture that dictates that women belong in the healing huts. like, he might also subscribe to the bioessentialist logic that women are better healers and men are being fighters, but that honestly doesn't really matter, because (unlike sokka) his epiphany lies not in the fact that woman can fight, but in the fact that his role in upholding these systems has actively driven his loved ones away due to his cruelty. he decides to be kinder, to women and in general, because he realizes that being an asshole has negative consequences. but frankly, who cares what he thinks of hama. realizing that your sister tribe in the south deserves aid and protection after being subjected to a century of genocide is kind of too little too late imo. unlike katara, sokka, aang, or kanna, who can approach this situation from the perspective of being a genocide survivor who even remotely understands hama's trauma, pakku really has no place in this conversation to me.
as for kanna...... god. hama/kanna reunion is genuinely one of the most heart-wrenching concepts to me in all of atla. as a sidenote, hama/kanna fanfic goes so hard every time. there's a total of like 15 fanfics for them on ao3 (last i checked) but they're all sooooooo. fucking delicious. tide locked........... ugh. anyway. i cannot fathom kanna's reaction upon learning that her closest friend once upon a time is not only alive, but also a convicted felon, for crimes including but not limited to manipulating her granddaughter, violating her (and sokka's) bodily autonomy in cruel and perverse ways, and forcing her to participate in that mode of violence in a way that traumatized her forever. even if you don't read them as former lovers (although it is indubitably better that way) it's so gut-churning. kanna lost so many people over the course of her life, and to learn that one of them has returned but in the worst way possible must be mind-boggling and distinctly unreal. like how do you even process that. first, how do you process how much pain she must have went through to become the kind of person who is capable of doing this, and then, how do you process the knowledge that the person you once loved most in the world irreparably hurt the person you now love most in the world? obviously she would always prioritize katara's safety over anyone else's no matter what, but god. kanna has led such a fascinating and impossibly difficult life, and it's not over yet.
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cemeterything · 7 hours
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This isn't a gotcha, so please don't take it as such, but would yuou be willing to explain what it is about VAL that makes her such a favourite of yours? I can't stand her myself, she comes across to me as a bully given god-like power that she abuses for her own amusement, and I've seen you acknowledge as much, but we draw completely different conclusions from that. I just want to understand your perspective.
i've been anticipating a question like this for a while now, so i'm more than happy to answer for you!
you're right, VAL is in some ways a "bully given godlike power" as you put it, and there's no avoiding that (nor do i want to). and yeah, i do like her in part because of that, because i have a fondness for horrible fictional characters and in particular "bad victim" archetypes, of which VAL certainly is one. but i think what makes her compelling to me, rather than repulsive, is that she is fundamentally a cautionary tale and a tragedy. in-universe, she's the scapegoat. the example. the "make the right choices or this could be you". she's inescapably, heartbreakingly human in her awfulness, and that makes her terrifying, but it also makes her deeply sad (at least to me).
i also strongly believe in rehabilitative/restorative justice, so for me, wanting better for VAL is about my real-world principles to a degree. i can't and won't argue that VAL doesn't function as an uncomfortable allusion to a lot of atrocious crimes against humanity (by humanity) within the narative, and that anyone who finds her upsetting or even hateful for these reasons is absolutely justified in doing so. however, she's still a fantasy entity at the end of the day. she's not a 1:1 stand-in for real-world abuses any more than, say, a vampire or werewolf, which plenty of people are more than happy to explore the nuances of. and there's also the question of what punitive measures would even achieve in her case, beyond personal satisfaction for the one administering or spectating them (which is not to say that wanting to punch VAL makes you as bad as she is, just that her arc is, among other things, about how cycles of abuse and violence perpetuate). the worst that could possibly happen to her has already happened. she's been tortured. she's been taken advantage of for her mistaken belief that working for and with the system has the opportunity to benefit her, and died for it. there's nothing to be "learned" from her punishment that hasn't already been shown to us. that she hasn't already internalised. if she were ever to develop a stable conscience, that would be punishment enough in my opinion.
despite being a victim of people not entirely unlike VAL, i personally am not her victim, so treating her with sympathy and kindness whilst acknowledging the elephant in the room that is her many (fictional) war crimes is not something that requires any cognitive dissonance on my behalf. i would cautiously argue that the narrative agrees with me somewhat in this regard - the few times VAL is treated to a genuine act of kindness with no ulterior motives, it shatters her composure and outward conviction that what she's doing is necessary for her personal satisfaction, and even prompts her to reconsider on occasion (sparing the woodsman comes to mind). i'm not saying anyone needs to hug her and tell her she's valid, but if all it takes is some genuine good intent to get her to engage in introspection, i'm willing to be the person to offer it.
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shares-a-vest · 4 hours
Text
Part 1
"Oh my god!" Eddie exclaims, "The gas station is closed!"
"What?" Steve leans forward, squinting out through the front windshield.
"Can you not see that it is?" Eddie asks, his voice laced with sheer panic, "Jesus Christ, you need a pair of glasses," he reaches for the steering wheel, "Pull over. I'll drive."
"Get off!" Steve shrieks, elbowing him out of the way.
The car momentarily swerves to the centre line but thankfully, there are no cars about – the world's most obvious sign that the gas station is indeed, closed.
He purses his lips as he slows the car to a crawl as they move through the crossroad and past Ernie's, a cheap gas station that is the go-to place for scoring some booze without being carded and procuring condoms without judgment.
He has no idea why the gas station would be closed but, considering the universe hasn't exactly been on their side today, Steve checks his mirrors and turns the Beemer around, resigned to an afternoon of everything but sex.
"Wait!" Eddie says, slapping him on the shoulder, the chain of his leather jacket tinkling with each motion.
Steve looks over and they both nod at the same time.
"Melvad's."
– 🍌🍌🍌 –
"Steve," Eddie spits through gritted teeth.
"No."
"Stevie!"
"Dude, you go."
"Steve..." Eddie steps in front of him and raises his hand, balling up his fist with frustration – he even throws in a nose scrunch in an attempt to make his point, "After everything that has happened over the past six months, there is no way in hell I am walking up to that pharmacy counter and buying a box of condoms in full view of half of Hawkins' housewives."
Steve folds his arms, "And I'm not buying condoms right in front of Claudia Henderson!"
He glances at the woman browsing three aisles over, terrified she will soon feel her ears burning and look up from the overpriced tomatoes.
Eddie scoffs, "Oh please, everyone knows you saunter that tight ass all over town. Anyway, I'm sure she'll find it 'so responsible' you use protection."
He uses air quotations and rolls his eyes with such condescension that Steve can't help but reach forward to snatch at his boyfriend's ringless hand and squeeze.
"Come on," he says, tugging him back in the direction of the entrance – they need to get a move on before anyone sees them.
He's sure Dustin will be lurking somewhere, ready to pounce and ask questions and be a goddamn nightmare and do everything he possibly can to make their afternoon even worse.
– 🍌🍌🍌 –
"Forget it," Eddie sighs as he slams his car door shut.
Steve is about to chide him but Eddie's shoulders slump and he sucks back a sniffle.
"What's wrong?" he asks, already knowing the answer.
"Let's just..." Eddie begins, looking forlornly out at the street, "I dunno – go back to your castle and I'll suck you off, or some shit."
"Wow, such a romantic," Steve quips as he fires up the car, feeling a flush creep up his neck nonetheless.
Eddie remains silent, flitting between huffing and sighing as he peels out and heads down the street, ready to scour the town in search of a solution.
The sun is setting now. A warm afternoon perfect for ahem, fucking one's boyfriend for the first time gone – wasted!
"What if I just..." Steve begins, distracted by the large sign showcasing several stores one street over from Melvad's, "I could just ask someone to buy them for us?"
He blinks up at the green and orange Family Video sign and smiles.
"Jesus Christ," Eddie mutters, sinking in his seat.
– 🍌🍌🍌 –
"Absolutely not."
"But Rob!"
"This is why you called in sick today?"
Steve runs a hand through his hair. He knows it's no use lying, or avoiding eye contact with his best friend because Robin knows that he is finally going to do it with Eddie.
... It's just that he had failed to mention that they set a date that also ended up being a perfect summer's day.
He looks around the empty store – it's not like he is needed here, anyway.
"Why could you just – " she makes a scissors motion with her fingers, " – Cut the wrapper open?"
Steve's jaw drops.
"Oh..." he hums barely above a whisper, "I didn't... we..."
He can feel Eddie shrug next to him and murmur, "We didn't... think of that. I... I don't even think Steve owns... a pair of scissors... His... Y'know his desk is pretty... bare."
Steve slowly turns his head as Eddie rambles, catching him making some weird swish motion he supposes is supposed to represent his empty student desk.
But soon they make eye contact and –
Eddie moves first, turning on his heel at break-neck speed. Steve quickly follows, the two of them scrambling for the front glass door with such force that the bell sounds like it could knock straight off its hinges.
"Hey, at least you kiddos seemed to have paid attention in health class!"
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vidavalor · 22 hours
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Hey Vida, I have some milk chocolate sea salt caramels to share. *Passes the canister*
Have you written about this moment yet? I'm guessing it has come up but I can't recall specifics.
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The time loop hypothesis that includes the idea that Crowley figures out what is happening and starts actively trying to influence things helps me understand why Crowley would say this - that he would despair after having been unsuccessful in every attempt he'd made to change the final outcome, to save Aziraphale's life. I know Crowley has some timey-wimey stuff going on generally, like his knowing the future and making all sorts of references to things that don't exist yet... I am very curious to know what you think Crowley's deal is and what is happening for him here.
...
Also, do you think Aziraphale knows from the beginning of S2 that he has fallen? I mean, the other angels refer to Aziraphale as a former angel and principality right to his face, don't they? I remember wondering about this the first time I watched the second series. I kept waiting for the show to clarify just what exactly Aziraphale's status was...
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Well, this is a more oddly worded question than I remembered. One cannot simply be "a bit of" a fallen angel wtf game are you guys (gn) playing at? Leave that perfectly frosted cinnamon roll alone!
...
Also, I am still full of so much anticipation wondering what I asked you last time! I am positive it had to do with innuendo lol
Hello to you, my fave @iammyownproblematicfave! 💕I am SO sorry about the other Ask-- I determined you asked about the innuendo in the "very nice" scene & I'm going to whip you up a batch of etymology around the insanely complicated history of the word "nice." It got lost in my Drafts folder for a little while there and I overlooked it-- will remedy that shortly! Here's thoughts on these questions and thanks for asking.
On Crowley, time & "too late" and Aziraphale, fallen angels & heavenly rank under the cut.
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First, time loop idea and Crowley's "too late" comments... So, anything is possible, right? That said, I don't think it's a time loop because I think there are scenes that explain why Crowley says "too late" at the end of that episode. I wrote about how it ties to unicorns & Wee Morag a bit in another post and I'll link it at the bottom of this one.
Basically, Crowley's anxious in that scene where he threatens Gabriel and then says that "it's always too late." Crowley's memory is iffy-- he admits as much to Gabriel later in S2-- and even if he was lying to Saraqael and/or Furfur about not remembering them, we know he struggles to recall all of his memories from when he was an angel. One memory that he felt confident about was the one he told Beez earlier in the season-- that The Book of Life is bunk that he and Beez made up to tease some of the more innocent angels. It is likely that this memory of Crowley's is correct. I say that because Beez seemed to think it possible when they heard it-- but then Beez felt like a fool at the thought that they'd been threatened by Heaven with something that didn't exist and that they themselves and Crowley made up. They doubled-down and insisted to Crowley that The Book of Life was real.
Crowley suddenly thought that Beez might be right because, hey, they'd run Hell for so long, they'd know more than he would, right? He starts to doubt his own recollection and he rushes back to the bookshop to help protect Gabriel as a way of protecting Aziraphale because he now is terrified that Aziraphale could be erased from existence if he is caught helping Gabriel. He doesn't want to tell Aziraphale that Beez reached out to him because he knows Aziraphale is sensitive about the fact that none of the angels have talked to Aziraphale in years and that their only source of intel is a demon with a thing for Crowley (Shax) so Crowley doesn't ever tell Aziraphale how scared he is about The Book of Life. Meanwhile, even though Gabriel is basically on their side now, Crowley can't exactly ask him if it's real or not because dude only knows Buddy Holly songs for basically the whole season lol.
So, in addition to worrying that Aziraphale is spiraling (because he is) and that helping Gabriel could mean that Aziraphale is risking his mental health and a fall, Crowley is also now terrified that Aziraphale could be made to have never existed. It's on his mind so much that he growls at Gabriel in that episode-ending scene that Aziraphale could be "risking his existence" for Gabriel and then muses about how it might be "too late-- it's always too late..." I don't think this is a time loop indication. I think it's a reference to other times Crowley has said "too late" in the past, like the unicorns and when Wee Morag died. It's about how it might be too late for him and Aziraphale and they might be running out of time and be on a collision course with death while not knowing it-- like how Elspeth never saw the fact that it was her last night with Wee Morag coming. It's Crowley's anxiety talking. Crowley thinks it's too late to turn back now because they're already helping Gabriel and Shax is sniffing around and they might be nearly out of time.
Crowley does have some time-related stuff happening in his story and the ability to control it but it seems to me more likely that Crowley's ability to remember that he has control of it has been taken from him in the present in S2 than it is that he's in a time loop. In the disaster kiss scene with Aziraphale, Aziraphale is really obviously signaling to Crowley a request that he freeze time. (It's obvious to us, I mean-- Aziraphale hid it from The Metatron by curving his hand.) He was trying to get Crowley to do what he did on the tarmac in S1 when he stopped everything and took them and Adam to a little time out cloud to help Adam figure out how to deal with Satan.
Crowley, though, just kind of stares at Aziraphale, even though this is literally one of the most recognizable hand signals on the planet. He also didn't just do it himself at the start of the conversation. If I were the villains, I'd be damn sure that Crowley didn't remember that he could freeze time after S1 and Crowley was gone all night before this scene (which he also doesn't seem to totally realize, no matter how many people around him keep commenting on how it's now morning.) The story, to me, seems to be suggesting that the Crowley & time stuff in S2 is that he doesn't recall that he can control it.
re: Aziraphale and what his angelic status/rank is in S1-- the cherub/principality/"you've been a bit of a fallen angel" bit...
When Michael and the other angels corner Aziraphale in S1 and Michael says that they've been learning some "disturbing things" about Aziraphale and that he's "been a bit of a fallen angel", the disturbing things are, imo, the photos of Aziraphale and Crowley that Michael has dug up. (Hypocritical much on Michael's part? Their phone chats with Ligur? That Gabriel knows about and lets them get away with but Michael wants to go after Aziraphale for having a relationship with Crowley? Yeah. Gross.) Michael and Uriel are threatening Aziraphale with a fall in the scene when they corner him. Uriel says "and don't think your boyfriend in the dark sunglasses will get you special treatment in Hell." They're using their power to threaten to cast him out as a way of trying to intimidate Aziraphale, which is another way of showing how political falling is and how it's all kind of b.s..
A demon is a fallen angel, by definition. That's the definition of a demon. Heaven has socialized angels to believe that the demons are all evil-- that they're devout followers of Satan and horrible people and to associate with them is to sully yourself with their satanicness and all that lol. In reality, there are some evil demons-- Satan is evil, Ligur was pretty bad-- but there are also some evil as fuck angels... The Metatron at the top of that list. In reality, the demons are the angels who put notes in the metaphorical suggestion box. They stood up and spoke out and questioned things. They're the curious, free-thinking "troublemakers" whose questioning of authority threatened to crumble The Metatron's power so he reacted by ostracizing them. He made a sense of the demons being "other" and evil. He invented Hell and banished them all to it-- lumping curious rebels like Crowley in with evil like Lucifer/Satan and using them as examples of what happens to those who dare to question. There really is no such thing as "a demon"-- there are just angels who have been told they're no good and that they've been cast out and are part of the collective owned by and working for Satan.
In S2, we get another bit of info about a fall when Gabriel falls. The Metatron can't send Gabriel to Hell like he would other angels because he did that once with Lucifer/Satan-- the last one to have Gabriel's job before Gabriel-- and once is "a good story" (meaning, once is a cautionary tale that keeps angels in line) but twice would suggest "an institutional problem"... twice would cause a rebellion. Twice would show that the problem is really Heaven. But, The Metatron has to do something with Gabriel, so he's going to erase Gabriel's memories (he tries to before Gabriel enacts Operation Fly and saves his memories thanks to Beez) and cast him down to a new rank of angel that they've just added to the bottom of the pile-- just for Gabriel lol. It's all political, which is how Crowley and Beez fell back in the day as well. They were caught up with Lucifer and held up as examples of evil when it seems that they really were just looking for others who were questioning things, too.
Does Aziraphale realize he's falling in S2? I think there's some language in the kiss disaster scene that indicates he suspects he might be and that he doesn't fully trust in what The Metatron is offering him-- or that that's really The Metatron. I don't think he realized he was falling until that point. It's a question, though, of what a fall really is. There are many ways to fall. You can literally fall from a great height. You can fall in rank. Both of these things happen during a fall from Heaven, in Good Omens, from what we've been told, but there are other types of fall. You can also fall in love. You can fall into despair. These ones? Aziraphale knew about. He fell in love with Crowley a long time ago and despair is always something he's working at keeping at bay, sometimes more successfully than others. In the end, his fall from Heaven is tied to both of those other kinds of falls.
But is Aziraphale already something of a fallen angel, like you asked? What of the fact that he was a cherub at one point and is a principality? Which is higher rank? We are told in the book that people "make jokes" about the fact that Aziraphale has both of those ranks. The word 'joke' comes from the Latin jocus, which literally means 'wordplay' and I think maybe looking at the different kinds of rank in Heaven through that angle might be worth a look. (Me? Taking a wordplay angle? Who would've ever thought? lol)
Who outranks who can be shown to us by how the characters behave in the scenes but the ranks of angels are more about what the words mean than about exactly which level that rank is, I think. For instance, there is some evidence that a throne and a dominion are the same level of rank-- that an angel can be both at once... which makes more sense when you consider the power aspects of those words and that here's our throne/dominion leaving his chair to dominate his plants in S1:
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People are complex and need more words than one title might allow.
Aziraphale can be a cherub and a principality because once you start to get into the meanings of all of these words, you can see that which ones are given to Crowley and Aziraphale are done because of how they support who the characters are-- and how they overlap. I have a meta that I've been playing with from time to time about the different meanings of principality/dominion/throne and how Crowley and Aziraphale are both really all of them. I'll try to finish that one up soon. If you look at wordplay around the word "rank" itself, though...
...a rank is a placement or a position in military order, yeah, but it's also a bad smell. Something that is rank is something that is foul and offensive. One of the themes of the show to me seems to be that, whether you're an angel or a demon or a human, you possess your own power and no one can take that away from you unless you let them. Empowerment and freedom is the realization of that. We're all equal beings. The characters who are the least interested with power systems-- the ones who have freed themselves from concern about it and live as independently as they are able-- are the ones who view others as autonomous beings and do not support oppression of others. They are the least rank because they are dismissive of the idea of rank itself.
So, while we're having fun with words here... those who are the least rank are also probably not rank in the scent sense of the word, too lol. This would be why we have a multiple scenes devoted to how everyone is in a faint over how great Crowley smells. He's the least rank of them all-- in every way possible. 😉
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The other "too late"-related meta:
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noneorother · 22 hours
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The art director & the Good Omens book cover tier list of doom, part 2
Part 1 l Part 2
I am your resident Art Director/Good Omens enthusiast, and welcome to my completely meta-free book cover tier list. Listen, making a book cover is HARD. I should know. But while we salute these artists for their hard work and time, I think we can all admit that once in a while, the vision is just not on. And on very rare occasions, publishers seemed to have managed to commission the cover art directly from hell... here's where we left off last time:
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Onwards and upwards, as they say. 11. International paperbacks, Goda Omen
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It is inexplicable to me but I LOVE this cover art. It's so sweet and innocent, the colours are contrasty and fun, and the layout leaves enough room for the text. Maybe I would call it slightly inaccurate to have our boys dancing on Greenland while the UK has drowned in a great flood, but hey. It's charming. The international cover gets a thwack with a ruler for trying to fit "creator of Discworld" in between the two wings like that, though. Tier: Great
12. Italian Cover, Buona Apocalisse à tutti!
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The Italian translation of Good Omens into "Happy Apocalypse to All!" really tickles my funny bone. Unlike this cover which is trying to scrape at it with a dull knife until I'm screaming on the floor. I know demons can only dance badly, but does Crowley *really* have to fracture both ankles while trying? Aziraphale pelvic thrusting his way into heaven is a visual I didn't think I'd ever want. Minus so many points for random murder alley where this is all occurring. At least the designer managed to wrangle the type into one of the best proportional layouts I've seen thus far? Tier: Bad
13. Italian Cover, Good Omens
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A truly valiant attempt here to rectify a terrifying situation with that earlier Italian version. While this one actually seems much more interesting at a glance, the details kinda get to me. The Bentley's steering being on the wrong side, the word Omens kindasortanotfquite fitting on the black wing, the motorcycles with no drivers... TIMES NEW ROMAN FOR THE AUTHORS NAMES. I don't think it can even be redeemed by the most powerfully rendered Sacred Heart/Cardi B W.A.P. imagery I've ever seen. Tier: Good (Omens)
14. Japanese cover, Good Omens
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Look, this designer GETS IT. Crowley and Aziraphale are a pair, a group of the two of us. Do not separate. It's also the only cover I've seen that uses shades of grey! The woodcut vibes are STRONG AND POWERFUL. The type is well placed! I should love this, except the end result kinda looks like a manual for clinical depression in the workplace? It's ending up higher on the list than it deserves, frankly.
Tier: Good (Omens)
15. Japanese cover, Good Omens
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This cover might as well be an Ethereal/Occult firemen's calendar. Someone wanted teens to cut off this cover and tape it to their bedroom wall. I can't even judge the typography or the symbolism because I'm just getting hit with waves of pheromones and angst. I can't even tell if it's good but it's going in the Good pile because I can't look at it anymore...
Tier: Good (Omens)
16. Japanese covers, Good Omens
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Other people have assured me that this is, in fact, a dual Good omens cover. Alas, I cannot tell. I don't possess compound eyes or even an exoskeleton, and as such lack the ability to decipher these decisions.
Tier: WTF
16. Japanese cover, Good Omens
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Holy overlap, Batman! I can’t fault this designer for wanting to reuse the wonderful dual illustrations in a Ying-Yang layout, all the elements are there, but there’s a clinginess to the type and positioning that makes me feel like someone is trying to hurt the letters? Is this designer okay? Do they need a hug?
Tier: Does the Job
18. Chinese cover, Good Omens
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Can I say how charming it is they’ve managed to conserve the halo and devils tale on the Chinese title, as well as the woodcut detailing? However, the simplicity of the cute, contrasting wing design is sadly swallowed by the intense, New-York taxi cab vibes coming off the yellow and checkerboard text block. It could have been so good! Chinese readers: I am mad on your behalf!
Tier: Not so good (Omens)
19. UK 1991 paperback, Good Omens
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What are we doing here, people. I think I've stepped into a Jungian analysis of what it feels like to have read Good Omens. It's dreamy yet unsettling. Right yet very wrong. And Ol' "Tiny Hands" Aziraphale up there is really judging me for what they found inside my mind. In less upsetting news, we've kept the improved typography and layout of the authors and book title. All is not lost to the nightmare.
Tier: Not so good (Omens)
20. 50 Shades of Gray rip-off cover, Good Omens
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*panic* WHAT ARE WE DOING HERE, PEOPLE...?! Bonus : the guardian quote is almost as much of a mystery as the cover it’s on.
Tier: WTF
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End of round 2.
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zerobaselove · 3 days
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an arm's length | kim taerae
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pairing: taerae x reader
genre: angst, fluff
word count: 951
warnings: some minor swearing. lowercase intended, not proofread
notes: loooooove me some angst into fluff. i feel like this is still kinda rough but i got a couple angst with a fluff ending requests for taerae so i thought i'd fulfill those :D i hope u all enjoy <3
close, but not close enough to burn. that was your rule. never let anyone close enough to burn you, don't let yourself get hurt. you had lived by those words for as long as you could remember, and you were pretty good at sticking to them; until kim taerae came along. and now you find yourself basking in the warmth, not worrying about the flames.
that would be your downfall, you just knew it. but you couldn't help it, couldn't help but getting close. keeping an arm's length turned into keeping yourself in his arms, and you didn't know how to handle it. didn't know how to go back to being cold.
sure, the two of you weren't anything official. nothing more than two friends.
two friends who kissed behind closed doors. two friends who fell asleep together more often than not. two friends who danced around the word love as if it would suddenly make everything too real, too fast. as if it would ignite and burn everything you had done, just like it burnt the walls you had built up.
even just the thought of love, the prospect of it all; of loving him, and the potential of him loving you back. the feeling tore at the walls of your heart brick by brick. years of hard work crumbling before your very eyes.
you were falling, you knew that. whether you meant for him, or falling apart, nobody would ever know. was there even really a difference?
fight or flight. a human's innate response to dealing with a threat. even if that threat was on your heart. and what would save you from falling? flying.
so you couldn't have been too surprised at the pounding at the door one night, opening the door slowly to reveal a disheveled and worried taerae. the one who had shown you what it meant to love, who made you face the fear of falling.
taerae was looking how you were feeling; a mess. out of breath from presumably running up the stairs to your front door, hair disheveled and glasses askew on his face.
"i have't heard from you in days," he panted out, "and when i tried to call you it wouldn't even ring through, i thought something happened." his voice was laced with worry, and you couldn't stop your heart from beating out of your chest. he cared. he really cared.
you opened the door wider, ushering him inside to take a seat in the familiar living room. "sorry about that," you muttered, remembering why you were ignoring him in the first place, "my phone's been dead and i just forgot to charge it." only a partial lie. your phone really was dead, but not for the last week or so that you hadn't messaged him.
"that's bullshit and you know it," he shook his head, "just talk to me."
talking. easier said than done with a heart seemingly beating in your throat. it didn't leave much room for the words to push past, now did it?
sitting opposite of him on the couch, the two of you sat in silence. the tension was so thick you felt like you were choking on it, trying not to breathe it in; your chest tightened, clawing for a breath of air. and so, you stopped holding your breath. you let yourself be vulnerable, even for a moment.
"i'm scared," you breathed out, not knowing what else to say. you hadn't thought this far ahead, but the softened eyes and small, urging smile seemed to help the words form.
"i just," another deep breath, "i'm scared because, i've never felt this way about someone. i've never let myself be vulnerable, and it's terrifying." you don't know when his hand found it's way to yours, but you were thankful for it, for the way it tethered you back to the earth and away from your mind. "i love what we are, and i want it, want you, permanently. but i can't get past the voice in the back of my head saying that i'm going to ruin it, or that i'm gonna get hurt again."
you felt like you were running out of breath, taking a moment for another inhale and exhale before letting the words continue to spill.
"kim taerae, i don't know how you did it but you got past the walls that i had built up, the ones meant to keep you out, meant to keep my feelings locked away. and now you're here, and i want you here," you choked on the tears now rolling down your face, "but i'm scared."
taerae gently lifted his free hand to wipe the tears from your cheeks, looking at you with more fondness than you were even sure was possible. "i'm scared too y/n," he pressed his lips together, "every day i am terrified that maybe you don't want me beyond our bedroom doors, that beyond the threshold, i'm just another friendly face to you."
he lightly squeezed your hand as the tears threatened to spill from his own eyes. how long had his eyes been so glossy? so full of stars, and yet so full of the fear of a sky without them.
he took a moment to collect himself, now holding both of your hands in his. "but it's a lot less scary alone," he smiled gently, "you don't have to be scared alone, not anymore"
the tears had begun rolling again as you leaned in to press a chaste kiss to his lips, feeling his own tears on your cheeks, mixing with your own.
maybe falling wasn't so bad, as long as you had a partner to do it with.
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rayshippouuchiha · 18 hours
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was reading through the bait au so... how long does it take Izuku to pick Nezu's habit of climbing up people and have them cart him about (mostly Aizawa because he has a scarf that satisfies his burrowing instincts). 'Cause I'm imagining a tiny Izuku popping out of Aizawa's scarf one day. (extra points if he keeps the habit of perching on shoulders all the way to adulthood like a demented massive parrot)
Honestly, it'd take Izuku a while to get that level of comfort with anyone outside of Nedzu. But! the first person he would hit that level with would absolutely be Aizawa at Nedzu's recommendation.
And Izuku is adorable and terrifying so of course he ends up winning the UA staff over pretty fucking quickly. And if that includes all the piggyback rides and scarf privileges he could want? Well it's what he deserves.
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mrs-theirin · 3 months
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i am going. to throw up
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bonefall · 5 months
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I’m rereading Po3 and despite its flaws I really enjoyed the introduction to the three. Jaykit isn’t mentioned to be blind in the first few chapters and instead they chose to show how much MORE capable he is compared to his littermates; until at the end of chapter 3, he brings up his blindness on his own. It makes forcing him to be a medicine cat SO much more frustrating because it really feels like they’re setting him up to be a warrior and choose his own fate (note i haven’t finished the reread this is just my first impression)
I like how you seem to take that path in BB regardless! It makes his arc so much more enjoyable
His arc in canon is super frustrating because he's such an independent character who clearly wants to make his own decisions in life, but then he just gets shoved into the medcat den. I LIKE that he ultimately goes there and that he enjoys it; but it was still really fucked up that they stripped away his autonomy in the process.
Re: they are not real, they are writing choices. Taking away the choices a disabled character can make over their own life, forcing them into a celibate nun role, and then going "awwwww dont worry see? he likes it! This was the best thing for him :)" was fucked up.
And imo it didn't have to be that way! You wouldn't have to go the FULL route I did with big changes, he could just be more involved in the descision to stop being a warrior apprentice and it would be fine. Minor change that would make a world of difference.
I do also have to interject to say though... blindness should really not be an extremely severe impairment for a ThunderClan cat.
I'm dead serious.
Whiskers are built-in sensors that tell you the exact position of everything within several inches of your head, ears swerve to pick up sound, and the jacobson's organ provides a sense of smell so keen that I have an entire Clanmew expansion draft because I needed to make WORDS describing the power of this sense that humans do not have. I cannot stress enough how delicate their other senses are, felines do not rely on their sight like primates do
ThunderClan lives in a mixed-oak woodland, where sight is already often obscured by foliage, objects are close together (for whiskers to feel), and nearly every movement makes noise against the leaf litter. RiverClan and (moor-running) WindClan cats would have a harder time with this disability than Thunder or Shadow.
Cat sight SUCKS to begin with. It sucks BADDD. They don't have color vision, they're significantly nearsighted, and they can't track up-and-down movements well. WC doesn't write realistic cats (more like small fuzzy people really) and I also work with more humanesque eyesight, but the only thing Jay should really lose is an ability to rapidly track a small animal swerving fast. Blind cats are often still excellent hunters in spite of that!
So it's an extra big waste that they railroaded him into a position he didn't choose, saying he couldn't be a warrior. This is the perfect disability to write, if you want to explore how ableism can impact the characters in this society who ARE legitimately still capable of nearly full independence, but still need to find accommodations for what they can't do.
In the same arc they're doing the dumb Cinder Reincarnation Plotline, no less!! Where SHE is also feeling like she has no choice over her "destiny," and gets a conflict over a potentially disabling injury
"Oh nooo if cinderpaw breaks her leg she wont be a warrior!"
"What the f-- Im Jaypaw and im reporting live from the scene where a Category 1 Idiot Moment is taking place. Woman breaks leg, suddenly everyone believes she is a horse, more at 11."
One of these days I should really make "herb guides" just covering how various sensory disabilities impact the lives of Clan cats and some tips for writing them as warriors, especially between Clans. Stuff you wouldn't usually consider, like how much noise deaf cats tend to make, how RiverClan would get a ton of sinus infections and lose their sense of smell, being blind in Sky vs Thunder, etc.
#I once saw someone say offhandedly 'well what if someone snuck up on jay from behind and attacked him. No whiskers there'#NEWSFLASH! YOU ALSO DONT HAVE EYES IN THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD#He doesn't have short whiskers either they're normally sized#Something like 4 - 5 inches on a cat like him. About double the size of the head foward and sideways#Once you're talking about close combat like the cats usually do there's no way that you can stay back far enough to avoid them#I want to rewrite owl and jay's fight or make a rematch where jay realizes owl is being a coward#Hanging just out of his range and jabbing at him#But once he realizes it's just a coward's strategy it clicks that the counter is to be aggressive#And not let his opponent out of his 'range'#Also give him a neat little scene where they're grappling next to Black's dam project where it's super muddy#And Jay is like 'YOU WANT TO PLAY DIRTY? LETS GET FILTHY' and dunks Owl's face down into the mud#Because Jay can fight without his sight but Owl doesn't know how to continue while there's stinging gunk in his eyes and nose#I like thinking about what I'm going to do for BB!Jay's matches because his fighting style is really fun to write#1. Be aggressive and proactive 2. Don't let them out of range 3. SCARE THEM#From the Mud Match he learns that the best way to end a fight quickly is to absolutely terrify them#Because they're usually not expecting the fight to be difficult nor are they expecting to feel like theyre in danger#So if you surprise them it breaks their willpower real fast#And as he gains a reputation for brutality he faces less opponents until he's practically known as the Cleric Without Mercy#Bone babble
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