#because it was like reading an onlookers pov of what happened with me today | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

halfelven · 3 years

Text

I just love so much that one of the first things we see Aragorn do is have a ptsd flashback, with a panic attack during their initial meeting in Bree

‘You can do as you like about my reward: take me as a guide or not. But I may say that I know all the lands between the Shire and Misty Mountains, for I have wandered the over them for many years. I am older than I look. I might prove useful. You will have to leave the open road after tonight; for the horsemen will watch it night and day. You may escape from Bree, and be allowed to go forward while the Sun is up; but you won’t go far. They will come on you in the wild, in some dark place where there is no help. Do you wish them to find you? They are terrible!’

The hobbits looked at him, and saw with surprise that his face was drawn as if in pain, and his hands clenched the arms of his chair. The room was very quiet and still, and the light seemed to have grown dim. For a while he sat with unseeing eyes as if walking in distant memory or listening to sounds in the Night far away.

‘There!’ he he cried after a moment, drawing his hand across his brow. ‘Perhaps I know more about these pursuers than you do. You fear them, but you do not fear them enough, yet.’

which is like, he is having a flashback so bad that he is feeling the pain again, he grips the chair tightly to ground himself/it’s a reaction to the adrenaline, and then disassociates hard enough that the hobbits/onlookers can see that he’s not seeing them/isn’t mentally there. he breaks himself out of it, but at that point has panicked hard enough that he has to wipe (presumably sweat off of) his brow.

and, like, yes this is what a panic attack can look like to onlookers because it is often very tight/restrained/drawn inward and while you feel like your heart is racing so fast you might die you might look like you’re just gripping your chair/yourself/the wall/your bag and your eyes are distant

and for that to happen in the second chapter of meeting Aragorn means so much to me because here is a tall, strong man with years of experience, one of the best fighters in Middle-earth, and he’s having a panic attack as one of his introductory actions

and it’s like so nice to read that after today when I had a panic attack bad enough that I had to take medication so strong that my friends go oh hmm be careful with that because no one seems to understand what is happening inside of me because it looks like that outside. I’m clinging to my own arms and staring at the wall but it feels like I’m dying again

it just means so much to me. like look at Aragorn he’s so brave and strong, right? he has ptsd flashbacks and panic attacks, and he’s still brave and strong. because breaking down doesn’t make you weak

#tolkien #lotr #aragorn #tolkien meta #ptsd #mental health #panic attacks #jr2t #lord of the rings #character study #sort of #started crying when I read that #because it was like reading an onlookers pov of what happened with me today #before I pulled myself together enough to take a valium #because I didn't want to have a complete breakdown #medication #I hope I tagged everything #I'm still a bit of a mess today #okay to reblog

3K notes · View notes

dngrs-untld-hrshps-unnmbrd · 7 years

Text

Before the Fall (Pt 1)

Destiny fic. A Dead Orbit scavenger is resurrected as a Guardian hundreds of cycles after her death but can remember everything from her old life. While she struggles to understand why another new Guardian brings back memories of a time Zavala wishes he could forget.

Set in two time periods: during the events of Destiny pre-Red Legion and just before the Battle of Six Fronts.

Author’s Note

Bear with me, I know this first chapter and author’s note are long. Future installments will be pithier.

This is a companion story to After the Fall but can be read as a standalone. It features my OCs Andara, an Awoken Voidwalker Warlock, and Piax, a human Sunbreaker Titan. It’s primarily Andara’s story but will feature chapters in Piax’s POV (point of view) exploring her early days of being a Guardian and why she’s so devoted to Zavala. It will also explore a lot of Zavala’s back story through his POV, including his romantic history. Because I’m allergic to stories without kissing.

OK, so, the lore. This is probably the longest Author’s Note I’ve ever written! Thanks Destiny for your confusing, vague lore XD For those interested, I’ll set out what we know that’s relevant to this story as well as the assumptions I’ve made.

You can totally skip this and start the story if you prefer. I’ll explain things in the story as I go along.

This fic is set during what I’ll call the Early City Age, just before the Battle of Six Fronts, and the Late City Age, just before the Red Legion Attack in D2. Six Fronts was the first big battle to defend the Last City and marked a turning point in the way the City was run. (In Zavala’s Origins trailer it’s the battle he, Shaxx and Saladin are street-fighting in.)

At the time of the Battle of Six Fronts, the Last City was at the mercy of the Faction Wars, there was no Consensus and it seems the Vanguard didn’t exist as it did today. The Wall had been built by the Titans. The Iron Lords were probably already dead so there was a power vacuum in the Last City.

One assumption I’m making is that the Exo Titan Saint-14 and Lord Saladin worked with the Speaker to govern the Last City, but in some sort of unofficial capacity. Saint-14 must have been in an important leadership role because after Six Fronts he vouches for the Warlock Osiris’s elevation to Vanguard Leader.

Another assumption is that because Saladin mentored Zavala and Shaxx and the early days of the Last City were kind of YAY TITANS, Saladin brought his boys into important discussions and decisions. This is long before the rift between Saladin and Shaxx, which happened after Twilight Gap.

The Crucible was founded after Twilight Gap but as Guardians love to fight each other I’ve made up a thing called Skirmishes. Shaxx runs these and they function in a similar but scaled down way to the Crucible.

Thank you to @littleshebear for letting me use her Zavala/Lyssa the Lighthearted relationship headcanons, and for all our endless discussions about lore and the Vanguard and Guardians. Lyssa is a real character in the grimoire, a Sunsinger Warlock like Osiris.

Tl;dr?

Early City Age = the City has a Wall and the Guardians are just starting to venture out beyond it

Late City Age = the setting of Destiny the game

Chapter One

Master Rahool, Late City Age

The little silver Ghost lay silently on the table where the Cryptarch had left it. A Hunter had brought it in a few hours earlier along with a stack of engrams that she’d found on Mercury.

Couldn’t revive it. Looked like it had been there for years, almost buried by a broken Vex gateway. Think you can fix it?

Now he had a few minutes to spare Rahool picked up the Ghost and examined it. Could he? Sometimes he performed maintenance on Ghosts that had received knocks on the battlefield, but they were more cosmetic adjustments. This Ghost could be beyond help, drained of Light and unable to seek out the Guardian it had once belonged to. He or she could be long dead, or perhaps the Ghost had never even found them.

There was a lot of gunk in its seams and Rahool worked at them with a thin silver tool. The Ghost was starting to look clean, but still very dead, when suddenly it lit up and made a whirring noise.

‘Ah, so you’re not dead. How long have you been sleeping?’

The Ghost began spinning urgently and a moment later shot out of his hands. Rahool watched it zoom across the courtyard and then over the Tower railings and out of sight.

He laid down his silver tool and smiled to himself. ‘Goodbye, Little Light. Looks like you’ve got someplace to be.’

Zavala, Early City Age

Twilight was descending and the gates were being readied for closure. The Wall cast its long shadow over the Last City, a sprawling thing of low stone buildings and wooden huts. The Traveler hung in the sky, bright white and silent.

Zavala remembered when the Last City was merely a motley collection of tents and had no Wall to protect it. That they’d managed to cling on in those early days was a miracle. With the Wall to protect them and new Guardians arriving in the City almost every day they could only grow stronger. There was hard work ahead of them and there was hope, and he found himself welcoming both equally.

A pulse rifle in his hands and a stack of other weapons on a trestle table before him, Zavala watched the thin stream of Guardians returning from the Cosmodrome. Two Titans, laughing loudly with their helmets under their arms, greeted Zavala before heading for the Guardians’ Hall behind him.

He’d be out there himself tomorrow but today he had duties for Saint-14, attending to the stockpile of new weapons that the Faction scavengers had traded with them. In the last few years they’d begun venturing outside the Wall, the Guardians clearing out enclaves of Fallen while the Factions looked for supplies.

A slight figure in black armour streaked past Zavala, pulled one of the Titans round and punched him in the face. He reeled, and blood began pouring down his chin. The scavenger started screaming at both of them.

‘How could you? Do you even understand what you’ve done? We’ll never be able to replace the tech that you –’

The bigger Titan, the one who hadn’t been punched, narrowed his eyes and reached for his gun.

Zavala threw down the pulse rifle he was holding and lunged for the Guardian’s arm. He didn’t recognise this woman but she wore a Dead Orbit insignia on her chest plate. If they shot her she would stay fatally, permanently dead. There were already enough tensions between the Factions and the Guardians and the last thing the Speaker needed was a murdered scavenger.

‘Hey. Hey. That’s enough,’ he called, trying to be heard over her screaming. But she wasn’t listening to him and a crowd was gathering.

Turning to the bigger Titan he said, ‘Go and report in to Saint-14. Both of you. Now.’ The Titan with the bloodied lip needed some persuading but finally the two of them headed into the hall.

The woman tried to follow them, still shouting, but Zavala hooked an arm about her waist and pulled her back. ‘No you don’t. I want a word with you.’

She was like him, an Awoken, with knotted purple hair and dusty black armour. A bag was slung over her shoulders and inside he could see it was stuffed with Golden Age tech. Good tech. Things the City needed. There was an auto-rifle holstered on her back and a knife at her hip, though even in anger she hadn’t drawn them. She didn’t want to fight, she wanted to be heard.

‘Want to tell me what that was about?’ Over his shoulder he could sense onlookers, but ignored them.

The Awoken finally seemed to realise he was there and spoke in a tight voice, her fists clenching. ‘I spent two hours clearing all the Fallen off a Warsat and those … those knuckleheads jumped in and destroyed it. I want to fucking kill them.’

A Warsat. They were precious to Dead Orbit and their mission to get a fleet off the ground. The Guardians needed them too if they were ever to reconnect a communications network. At the moment they were living blind and that was dangerous.

‘It’s a terrible waste. But things happen in the field –’

‘They destroyed it on purpose.’

Zavala pressed his lips together. They wouldn’t have. Would they? ‘If that’s true then it’s unforgivable. I’m sorry.’

‘It is true.’

Then I’m going to need to talk to Saint-14 and Saladin about this. The chain of command between the Speaker and the Factions and Guardians was blurred with all groups feeling like they knew what was best for the City, but if Titans had screwed up then it was clear what needed to be done.

He reached for his datapad. ‘One of the Hunters came back to the City with a suspected Warsat sighting yesterday. I know it won’t make up for the time you spent on the other one, but it’s something.’

It was quite a lot, actually. They could have swapped this intel with the factions for more weapons or tech.

She examined the coordinates, her expression tight but mollified. ‘I know the place. Thank you.’

‘Be careful. That place is infested with Fallen.’

But the young woman was already striding away, her hand tight around her bag strap. ‘I can handle myself. You handle those numb-nuts.’

Zavala grimaced. Something to look forward to. If he had his way he’d send the two Titans who’d destroyed the Warsat with the scavenger to help her get the new one, but Saint-14 was wary of getting too involved with the Factions. They do their thing and we do ours, and keep our people strictly separate lest we start bleeding Guardians to their causes.

It was true that the Factions’ aims were vastly different theirs, and each others, but they had to think in terms of the next few hundred cycles. Pushing back the Fallen from the Cosmodrome, getting airborne again and protecting this City was going to take everyone’s efforts, no matter their loyalties.

He turned back to the pile of weapons and saw that the cluster of onlookers had dispersed except for an exceptionally large Titan and a Warlock in canary yellow robes. Shaxx and Lyssa the Lighthearted. Lyssa was looking at Zavala with the smallest of smiles on her lips.

Shaxx watched the scavenger disappear into a side street on the far side of the square. ‘That was a good punch she threw. Shame she’s fallen in with those scrounging bastards.’

Traveler’s light, he was getting sick of this sort of talk. ‘We need Dead Orbit. The supplies they bring in are helping the City get off the ground. We don’t have time to scavenge ourselves.’ And if the scavengers were willing to risk their one life in the Cosmodrome they deserved respect for that, at the very least.

‘Not far enough off the ground for them though, is it?’ Shaxx grunted. ‘You handled her well.’

‘I didn’t handle her. I just did what needed to be done.’ Zavala turned his attention back to the weapons. He’d finish up here and go and talk to Saint. No, he’d talk to Saladin first. His mentor always had something sensible to say. He wished the Iron Lord would lead the Titans instead of the Exo, but Saladin had said many times that he was an old wolf and didn’t have it in him. Not anymore.

‘I’m going to get something to eat if either of you need a break,’ Lyssa announced.

Zavala pushed the pile of weapons to one side, sorting through them. Only two auto rifles, and in terrible condition. Later tonight he’d strip them back and see whether he could fix them.

‘Zavala.’

There was an edge to Shaxx’s voice and he looked up. ‘What? Oh, goodbye Lyssa.’

The Sunsinger headed for the hall with a flick of her yellow robes, and Shaxx sighed. ‘You are an ass sometimes.’

Three pulse rifles. Five sidearms. ‘Am I?’

‘Lyssa. She wants to get to know you better.’

He’d heard that before. Guardians wanted to get to know him into order to grill him about his fighting techniques. Or at least that’s what it felt like. ‘She’s already bested me in the Skirmishes.’

The look of shock on the Titan’s face was comical. ‘She did? When?’

It had been about a year ago, and the Sunsinger had burned through him like he was nothing. When he finally felled her she’d leapt up again before he’d got his breath back and knocked his legs out from beneath him. Aiming an empty sidearm at his head she’d whispered ‘pew, pew,’ and he couldn’t help but grin up at her.

‘It didn’t show on the tally. She was out of bullets.’ But they knew, and ever since when she overheard him talking about the Skirmishes he thought he saw a secretive, pleased smile on her lips. But she hadn’t told anyone, so neither had he. ‘Shaxx, move. I want to get this finished.’

The larger Titan folded his arms and looked at his friend. ‘I wasn’t talking about the Skirmishes. Why is everything about fighting with you?’

‘That’s rich,’ Zavala murmured at his datapad.

Shaxx grinned. ‘I know how to have fun. And Lyssa wasn’t thinking about besting you. Not in the Skirmishes at least.’

Zavala finally looked up. ‘Then why did she …’ But the knowing grin on Shaxx’s face made him trail off. Oh, like that.

‘Bald, blue and apparently pretty thick. I don’t know why she’s interested either, but I’ve never wasted much energy trying to understand women.’ Shaxx clouted him on the shoulder and said as he walked away, ‘Go and talk to her.’

Finally distracted from the pile of weapons Zavala looked toward the hall. Was he hungry?

He could eat.

He was just putting down his datapad when Osiris appeared across the square, the Warlock’s long, thin figure upright and haughty. He walked past Zavala and entered the hall.

A cloud passed over Zavala’s good mood and he suddenly remembered why he didn’t see much of Lyssa. Everywhere she went her mentor seemed to be, crooning at her like she was a pet. Something about the man got Zavala’s hackles up and he turned back to the weapons with a frown, finding that he wasn’t hungry after all.

You made it to the end, thank you! I hope you’re enjoying it so far. Leave me a comments and let me know what you think. Huge thanks to @littleshebear for beta-ing and checking my lore.

#destiny fanfiction #destiny the game #destiny 2 #commander zavala #lord shaxx #oc: piax #oc: andara #commander zavala x female Guardian #before the fall

19 notes · View notes

imaginethemkmusic · 7 years

Text

Trophy Girlfriend Jay Park x Reader [Requested]

Request: Annyeong! If the requests are still open? Can I ask for a Jay Park scenario? If yes then, I’d like it if you are best friends acting like a couple. Thank you so much and sorry If they aren’t open♡ I’ll support you!!

Hello! Requests are still open so you’re okay! And please do support us! We appreciate it! I hope you like it! I rushed a bit at the end so if you want it fixed I can!

*******

Pairing: Jay Park x Reader

Word Count: 2525

Genres: Angst, Romance, Fluff

Warnings: None (unless you count sasaengs)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N PoV:

Damn, where is he? You awkwardly looked around the airport with the stack of your luggage piled next to you. You were visiting your good friend Jay in Korea, and he was supposed to be here to pick you up.

Bzzt. Bzzt.

You looked down at your phone, he had sent you a text apologizing for being late.

You rolled your eyes, of course he was running late. But that was Jay, and even though you acted like this, you couldn’t deny the attraction you felt towards him. But how could he not be late when his fangirl stalkers were watching him. What were they called again?

Ah that’s right, sasaengs.

You had definitely heard about the hardcore fandoms of the K-hip hop and K-pop world from Jay before.

It’s a good thing I wore sunglasses and a face mask.

You thought to yourself. Who knew what would happen to you and Jay if paparazzi and sasaengs caught a sight of your face.

“Turn around.”

You yelped at the male voice in your ear, completely knowing who the suspect was.

“Jay!” you exclaimed glaring at his also sunglassed and masked face, “were you really running late or were you sneaking up on me the whole time!?”

He shrugged, “Little of both. How could I resist a view from the back?” he jokingly smirked.

You slapped his arm hard, “Stop being such a perv jackass.”

“Son of a bitch!” he cussed, “we’ve been best friends for years but I still can’t get over that pack a punch strength you have.”

“Wow, I forgot how much of a bitch you were,” You laughed.

“Why are we even friends, again?” he muttered.

You raised an eyebrow, “I heard that. Now hurry, I’m getting tired!”

He mock bowed before loading your stuff into the car. The cockiness was on fire today, you thought. You felt an itch behind your mask so you quickly unhitched it from behind your ears when a gust of wind blew it away.

“Shit!” you cussed, trying to catch it, knocking into Jay.

“Y/N?” he asked, confused.

He moved to stand, accidentally smacking your sunglasses off your face. The wind continued to blow and you dropped to catch your sunglasses, moving Jay’s sunglasses.

“Achoo!” Jay sneezed and his mask came off.

You both froze.

“Oh shit,” you whispered, realizing that both of you had no protection against the paparazzi.

“Y/N,” he said, voice low in case onlookers were listening, “Get into the car… now.” Judging my his tone, you both needed to jet fast. You hopped into the shotgun seat forgetting about your sunglasses while Jay closed the trunk and hopped in.

Flash. Flash.

You winced, paparazzi and sasaengs were not a force to be messed with here in South Korea.

“Fuck, hurry up Jay!” you yelled.

“There’s a load of fangirls in front of us! What am supposed to do? Run them over like ‘sorry, I need to save my sorry ass in exchange for your shitty life!?” he yelled back.

You narrowed your eyes before reaching over and slamming your hand down the steering wheel to startle the surrounding people.

“I don’t care,” you said lowly, “GO!”

Not even caring, he stepped on the petal, making the onlookers jump out of the way. It was silent until-

“Well I was glad you were staying at my place for another reason,” he said suggestively, “but now it’s even better because now you’re under my protection.”

You groaned, “The sasaengs are going to try and kill me aren’t they?”

Jay shrugged, but you already knew the answer. You were glad all your social media was private, or by now you would be receiving so much hate mail. Jay soon pulled to a stop at a tall building.

“We need to talk to Kiseok,” he explained, “here’s another face mask.”

You caught the one he threw at you and hooked it behind your ear, following him into the building. He was already talking to another attractive male, eyes widening when the latter showed him something on his phone.

“Shit,” Jay muttered, walking up, “this was supposed to be a bestfriend visit type of thing,” he sighed, “but now it’s blown out of proportions.

“What happened?” you inquired.

“Well obviously,” Jay said, “the paparazzi is going to spin some dating scandal. But what’s worse is a girl got your sunglasses and your face mask that you dropped earlier. She said that she’s the one who was with me and using them as evidence. She’s claiming that I just had a one night stand with her…she’s not even my type.”

“Jay!” you hit him over the head, “be serious here!”

“Yea…she’s saying that I lead her on for weeks only to break her heart and humiliate her in front of all her friends and that I was bad in bed and kept verbally saying vulgar things,” he said.

You bit your lip, “Wow, is she an anti?”

Jay nodded, “Yea probably. And the only way to fix it is to find someone to actually stand in as a girlfriend to prove her wrong.”

You faltered a little… who would he choose?

“Ah okay…” you said.

“So I have to find someone who would fit what the girl looks like,” he showed you his phone.

You studied the picture, she had Y/E/C eyes and Y/H/C hair. She almost looked familiar…. No wait, extremely familiar! She looked like you!

“Wha?” you wondered.

“Y/N,” he said seriously (for once), “will you please stand in as my fake girlfriend? It might be awkward as hell and a pain in the ass, but I really need-”

You gave him a quick smile, “Of course!” you smiled, “what are best friends for?”

“Well…” he said, “there are special type of friends-”

You rolled your eyes trying to suppress the heat from your cheeks, “don’t even think about it Jay.”

“No harm in trying!”

*********

Your palms were sweaty, and quite clammy as well, as you waited for Jay. The press conference had seemed too terrifying…. Until now. Although you and Jay had practiced multiple times together already over the span of 3 days, you were afraid you were going to forget everything.

“Breathe,” Jay said, coming up to you, “just like we practiced. Oh- you look good too,” he winked at you.

You laughed, feeling a lot calmer already, “Thanks.” You felt a little over dressed from your usual attire, seeing as you had to make a good impression for the sake of Jay.

“The press conference will now start.”

Almost instantly, you are bombarded with questions. There were cameras going off, in hopes to catch a good image of you two with all the pushing going on. To be honest, you were feeling quite overwhelmed again.

“U-uh,” you stutter a bit, “one at a time please!”

They ignored you, ticking Jay off a bit. He might jokingly insult you from time to time, but he at least respected your requests.

“You heard her!” he raised his voice, “one at a time!”

You smiled gratefully at him, as the reporters listened to him.

“So it was you pictured with Jay Park and not the other girl?” a woman asked you.

You shook your head, smiling like you had practiced, “Yes, it was me. The girl was an anti, and so when we ran off, she grabbed my dropped objects to use it as false evidence.”

“I see…” reporters scribbled your words down on their notepads.

“How come we’ve never seen you?”

“How long have you-”

You continued to answer the continuous stream of questions they had for you. You were a little stiff at first, but as time dragged on, you felt yourself relax. Sooner than expected, the press conference ended.

You sank down in your chair, “Hah…that was tiring.”

“You did good,” Jay said, drinking a bottle of water, “just like we had practiced.”

You narrowed your eyes, “Just like we had practiced my ass! What was all of that!? Kissing my cheek and putting your hands all over me like that!”

“Well,” he said teasingly, “if you’re going to be my fake girlfriend, might as well take the chance! And with that little display, they didn’t doubt our story!”

“That is true…” you mused, “but next time you gotta tell me.”

He put his hands up in mock surrender, “Whatever you say. Let’s go, I don’t know about you but I want to sleep.”

“Same,” You yawned.

“We can always sleep together-”

“Don’t even think about it,” you interrupted, cheeks suddenly blazing. Why was your face hot? Surely by now, you would know Jay’s perverted ways already.

“Alright,” he said, defeated, “let’s go.”

You let him take your arm as you both walked to the car. Almost instantly, you felt your eyes close, heavy with sleep as you sat shotgun.

Bzzt. Bzzt.

You felt your phone buzz and you looked down. You had received a text from an unknown number.

“Stupid bitchy whore, taking Jay.”

You’re eyes narrowed, how had they found out your number? You watched as your phone collected more and more messages, most likely from sasaengs.

Bitch

Go die!

Kill yourself!

You’re not good enough!

Ugly!

Fake ass plastic barbie!

You felt your mood decline, and your wanting of sleep slip away as you read the messages. You suddenly felt paranoid, if they could find your number, they could find and do almost anything!

“Hey…” Jay said, noticing your silence, “are you okay?”

You didn’t want him to worry anymore than he did, “Yea!” you forced yourself to say, “just tired, that’s all.”

He didn’t seem to believe you, but didn’t press it. You blocked the numbers and turned your notifications off to keep you from showing any signs of abnormal behavior. You looked out the car window and let the steady rhythm lull you to sleep.

Jay’s PoV:

We pulled up at the house and Y/N was sleeping peacefully. I looked at her face and stared, it was rare that I ever got to see her with her guard down. I picked her up and carried her to the bedroom, but I noticed her phone kept flashing.

“Mmm,” she stirred in her sleep.

I set her down on the bed, before grabbing her phone. She said she was just tired but… we were best friends. I can tell when she’s lying. In fact, I’m a bit insulted that she didn’t think I’d notice.

‘What’s her password again?’

I thought about it for a bit. Y/N would put her password as something only people who really knew her well would know. I typed in (your password) and her phone unlocked. I frowned at what I saw.

You better watch your back!

We’re going to get you!

Your death will be my happiest day

Some messages were downright insulting, while others were just plain threatening. I frowned and started blocking all the numbers. When I was finished I clenched my free hand into a fist.

Don’t worry… I’ll protect you.

I stood up and went to close the door. I would protect from from everyone and everything… including me and my damn thoughts.

Y/N’s PoV

I fluttered my eyes open, trying to suppress my blush from when Jay carried me. The power of a long term crush…. is frightening. But could I take this as a sign that he liked me back?

Bzzt.

I let out a frustrated groan, remembering that Jay had found about the hate messages. No matter how hard I had tried to not worry him, it ended in the opposite.

I can’t just receive… I’ve gotta give too…

I stared at my phone. And I could start with deleting all my social media.

~Time Skip~

I threw my phone back onto the bed after finishing making my whole life private. If I had no social media I could do nothing to harm Jay.

“You awake?”

I jumped a little when I heard Jay’s voice from outside the door. Taking my silence for an answer, he opened the door.

“Hey wake up- oh,” he stared a little, “you’re awake.”

I nodded, “Yea, just woke up a little while ago. Did you need something?”

“Do I need a reason to talk to my best friend?” he smirked at me cockily at me, looking crazily sexy.

I returned his smirk with a raised eyebrow, “Yes you should, it’s a privilege to be able to talk to the queen!” I joked.

He laughed and sat on the edge of he bed, “Wow, I see your lame sense of humor hasn’t changed.”

“Lame? If I remember correctly it was you who snorted milk out of your nose laughing at my jokes!” you cried out.

This caused both of you to break out into laughter. It felt good to laugh, seeing all the craziness that has happened in such a short matter of time.

Jay ceased to laugh first, “But in all seriousness… I saw the messages you were getting from the sasaengs.”

“Oh,” you fiddled with your thumbs, “I didn’t want to stress you out anymore than you already were-”

“Bullshit,” he spat, “we’re best friends Y/N. That means no matter what, we can share shit with each other. And the moment you agreed to this it meant you could confide with me.”

You sat in silence for a while, stunned at his little speech. You felt your heart melting at his words. Could the man in front of you get any more perfect in your eyes?

“Jay…” you started, “How uncharacteristically gentleman like you were just now!”

He groaned, “Y/N I’m serious! You can talk to me about anything, even the weirdest shit. Because you didn’t have to do this. I know it’s going to be awkward and that you hate it and I don’t deserve you fake or real platonic or not but-”

You widened your eyes at the unsuspecting confession. You saw that Jay was surprised too.

“I mean that-”

You processed the words… he liked you? Your heat beat faster and you began to lightly hit yourself.

“I’m dreaming,” you said to yourself, “this is just a good dream and he doesn’t like me.”

Jay paused at his attempt to salvage his pride, “A good dream? Doesn’t like you?” he slowly processed the words before taking your hands, “no, this is real. Don’t like you!? Are you kidding!? I’ve waited years! And my thoughts were so…. so…. so dirty!”

You blushed, “But you flirt with everyone!”

“To hide the fact that I like you! Y/N, it’s been you!”

You sat in shock, not believing what you heard. One last time, you pinched yourself to make sure you were awake.

“Don’t hurt your beautiful self,” Jay said, taking your hands, “this is real.”

You buried your face into his shirt, wrapping your arms around his waist, “It’s been you for years too,” you mumble embarrassed.

Smiling, Jay rested his chin on your head, hugging back, “I’m glad.”

You smiled as well, I guess you were his girlfriend now…. for real.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Admin H (with help from Admin G) (Thanks for requesting! Hope you all enjoyed!)

#Jay #park #jaebeom #amog #ceo #romance #reader #x #khiphop #fluff #sasaengs #fake #text #imaginethemkhh #trophy #girlfriend #requested #asked #khh #scenarios #jay park

287 notes · View notes