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euphoricsunflowers · 3 years

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steal me with a kiss — lee hoseok/wonho

a/n: this was the most self-indulgent thing i’ve ever written and believe me, as someone who’s masterlist is like half wonho, mostly everything i write is self indulgent. this fic has consumed so much of my soul, it’s probably my favorite thing i’ve ever written honestly so pls enjoy 👀👀 also big thank you to leila, jazzy, nae, and rosie for listening to me while i was writing this when i would not shut up about it <33

word count: 4.0k (i kNOW)

content: sub!wonho, dom!fem!reader, lots of kissing, hickeys and marks, oral (f receiving), fingering (m receiving), pegging, dacryphilia/crying, aftercare scene, some angst, he’s a bit different than i usually write him, not exactly bratty but up until the end he’s not the sweet bunny that i usually write him as :,)

summary: so pull me closer and kiss me hard, i’m gonna pop your bubblegum heart.

in short: wonho is a daydream and a nightmare all wrapped up with a pretty little bow. he’s the cutest thing to ever exist, his body is impossible to take your gaze off of, his smile wrecks your heart and his smirk makes you lose your mind. he’s an unforgettable beauty, and the worst thing is: he knows it.

you’re not sure what exactly you are with him, whether you’re dating or you’re just friends with benefits or if you’re just so wrapped around his finger that it’s impossible to escape.

you remember the moment you got hooked on the pink-haired beauty.

the scene is set at minhyuk’s party last year. you remember how minhyuk even warned you. he warmed you how the pretty boy with the muscles and the pink hair picks his target and steals their heart ruthlessly, sucking them in with cute smiles and dark smirks. it’s like he doesn’t even have a heart of his own.

you remember the way he pulled you away to a room where you were alone.

you remember how his hands wandered as you dragged your nails against his skin and wrapped your hands around his neck, feeling satisfaction from how you could feel his pulse, feel his breaths in and out even if you weren’t actually choking him yet. however, there wasn’t a single bit of fear in those dark brown eyes. you kissed him while he smiled against your lips with you still holding his neck. he tasted like the sweetest liquor and you wanted nothing more than to get drunk on this pretty thing, “you’re so pretty with my hands around your neck.”

you remember how he still smirked and winked when you murmured how you’d love to ruin him. his touch kept you just as locked against him as you kissed him until you were satisfied, pulling back to simply stare at him, his pretty lips all parted and puffy from your bites, eyes half-lidded giving him the impression of both the predator and the prey.

you remember how his hands wandered under your clothes, holding your waist against him, and you remember how perfect his body looked up close, how you’d kill just to get your teeth on his neck and chest, how you were already imagining him shivering before you even knew what this boy’s presence would do to you.

and you distinctly remember how he pulled away from it all so easily, left a kiss on your cheek, and disappeared out the door without a trace. ever since that moment, it’s been him in your head, his smile and his eyes and his lips and his body that floods your thoughts.

and you can tell that he loves it, he thrives off of the attention. he’s constantly flirting, sending you sweet messages just to keep you thinking about him (there’s really no need to, you already are most of the time), etc. it’s enough to drive you mad.

most of your interactions are just his teasing words, his pretty smile, and/or his intoxicatingly beautiful body, leaving you starstruck. it’s either that or he drags you away to make out. maybe you’ll wrap your hands around his neck or maybe you’ll bite his lip and taste the blood or maybe something else entirely and then disappear right from under your grasp once again. he’s an enigma.

and then he calls you one day, saying all the sweet nothings he always says before getting to what he actually wants you for, “you should come over, baby.”

“i’m busy, wonho, maybe next week,” you murmur, but it’s a lie. you know it’s a lie and, perceptive as he is, he knows it too.

“but you said that last week! are you avoiding me?” he pouts. you can’t see it but you know he does, he makes the kind of voice he does when he pouts.

“what? no, i’m not avoiding you—,” bullshit, you absolutely were, “— but i have things to do. i’m sorry the world doesn’t revolve around you.”

“yours does,” he mumbles under his breath jokingly (though he’s not wrong), “c’mon, i just want a little bit of your time! don’t you miss kissing me?” yes, yes you absolutely do. take away all of his smirkings and teasing words and he’s absolutely heavenly to kiss, perfectly melting against you in a way that’ll make your head spin. his bruised lips haunt your memories, his soft, dazed eyes are all you want to see.

“i- wonho, please,” you plead, but knowing he’d already won you over, “don’t talk like that. you’re playing so dirty.”

he giggles, “hmmm, but don’t you wanna kiss me? bite my lips? kiss me until i’m aching? leave bruises on my hips from how tightly you hold me-?”

you hang up the phone on him.

god, why did he have to talk like that? it makes your cheeks flush, so flustered from his words, so wrapped around the idea of doing all those things to him it makes your head spin.

wonho. the boy with the softest giggles and sweetest eye smile and the smirks that drive you wild and the body that would make anyone’s knees weak. maybe he’s so used to people wanting to be ruined by him and that’s why you interest him so much because there’s no other reason he’d give you so much of his attention.

he doesn’t exactly give it out to you freely, but it’s so much more than anyone else gets. you’re sure it’s because he adores the attention, so he doesn’t mind if you’re a bit more dominant than he’s used to (he might even like it).

it’s so obvious how much you’ve fallen for the pretty boy with pink hair, the lovesick feeling in your heart never quite dissipating. it’s obvious because even after all the attempts at trying to avoid him today, you’re there knocking at his door, and he’s pulling you in quickly as he shuts the door and pins you to the wall as fast as he can, keeping himself as close as possible to you as he murmurs, “hi, baby.”

it’s incredible how breathless it leaves you, but you pull yourself together almost instantly, pulling him closer by his waist, humming in contentment as your hands rub up and down his waist, feeling the muscles that drive you so desperately crazy, “hello there, my pink prince.”

he giggles, “you like my hair a lot, don’t you?”

“guilty as charged,” you murmur, raising one of your hands to grip him by the back of the neck, giving him no chance of escape as you press a kiss to his lips. he smiles because fuck he’s always smiling like the cheeky bitch he is. his smile is so beautiful but it’s always laced with the right amount of cocky energy to keep you on edge.

he pulls back just to murmur, teasing in the way he speaks, “you can kiss me harder than that,” and so you do. you grip his jaw so tightly you just hope it hurts, kissing him with the intention of leaving his lips aching with cuts and bruises. he moans as you kiss him, knowing it’ll drive you insane, and of course, it does.

once you’re done with his lips, having sufficiently bruised them up, you start to kiss down his jaw, bringing your hands back down to his waist to keep him against you, before pulling away, “was that hard enough for you, baby?” you ask with a mocking tone when you say the pet name he loves so much.

“nothing’s enough for me, baby,” he breathes a bit heavily, still with that stupid grin on his face, and you roll your eyes, “you know you love me.”

you sigh, because god he’s right but you want to wipe that smirk off of his face. ‘of course i do but god you really love to watch me suffer don’t you?’ your head is so clouded with feelings of him you can’t exactly boil down to one word. is it love? or do you just want to see him break, see all of his act break down? “you're going to drive me insane,” you mumble under your breath, “you can’t bring me here just to taunt me.”

“i can do what i want, baby, your heart is mine to break,” he murmurs, but you’ve had enough of his attitude.

it’s your turn to smirk, pulling him in by the collar of his shirt, whispering, “just like how your body mine to wreck, right, baby?” he whimpers. god, it’s barely audible, but he whimpers and it’s everything you’ve been wanting this whole time. you don’t say anything about it because he’d obviously pretend it didn’t happen. but it did, and it was the most satisfying thing you’ve ever heard.

his break in composure doesn’t last long at all, “well there’s a bright pink strap-on in the closet calling your name,” he murmurs, leaning in just to taunt you, “so why don’t you ruin me?”

it’s startling because the furthest you’ve ever gone was make out until your lips hurt and touch each other, groaning and moaning as your lips made messes out of each other, but he doesn’t look even a bit hesitant, so you decide you might as well take the opportunity. maybe he’s got you wrapped around his finger, but you’ll have your thighs wrapped around his head soon enough, “hm, how about instead you get on your knees and earn it?”

he slips for a second time, somewhat startled and almost flustered by your words, but he recovers just as fast as the first time, “of course, i’d love to,” he murmurs, sinking to his knees like it’s where he’s meant to be, his place being before you. he looks up at you with half-lidded eyes and a smirk, and all you want is to see him fall apart, it’s everything your soul craves, “can i?”

“if you say please? maybe,” you see the way he rolls his eyes at your words, still with that grin on his face, but he plays your game.

“can i please take off your pants and panties so i can pleasure you so when you’re satisfied enough you fuck me until i see stars?”

you groan, “that attitude isn’t gonna get you far, baby, but go ahead,” he fumbles with the zipper of your jeans, pulling them down along with your underwear so he could get them off of you. still up against the wall, you let him pull them off, watch him as he sets them next to his bed.

he crawls even closer to you until he’s so close to your cunt that if he leaned in just a little bit more he could give it a lick. he looks up for permission one last time, so oddly obedient even when he’s so cocky.

you nod, giving him the go-ahead to go in and lick up and down, fucking you with his tongue, sucking on your clit gently but increasing the intensity once it’s not enough. he holds the sides of your thighs to balance himself and to also be able to touch you, but what if you....“hands behind your back, wonho.”

“oh, you say my name like it’s a weapon, baby,” he leans back with a smirk to whisper while looking you in the eye. you force his head back to your heat with your hand, though you can feel him smile even more. despite this, he does keep his hands behind his back for the duration he spends on his knees eating you out. he’s cute with his hands behind his back, you muse. he’s incredibly skilled at it, and you wonder just how many times he’s been in between a girl’s legs. the thought makes you jealous in a way it absolutely shouldn’t.

“make me cum, sweetheart, and i’ll fuck you as hard as you want,” you mumble, gripping the bubblegum pink hair on his head as he works even harder to help you reach that high.

the second it hits, your moans halt for just a moment before becoming louder as you start to heavily grind against his face, using him for every last bit of pleasure you can before letting him go. he falls back onto the ground, breathing even more heavily than you, “sorry if that was too much.”

“don’t be, i like being useful,” he murmurs, before getting back onto his knees once he recovers somewhat, that stupid smile back on his face, “do you want me to keep going, baby?”

“stand up,” you order, and the second he’s up you’ve got his jaw in your hand, pulling him close, “go get that strap-on you were talking about, undress, and get on the bed. you’ve got lube right?”

he pulls your hand away from his face, pressing a teasing kiss to your palm, “of course i do, babe, don’t worry about it,” he winks before disappearing into his closet only to reappear with exactly what you asked for. he does what you ask, having a somewhat shy moment as you throw off your shirt and watch him undress, but he decides to make a show of it, sexily throwing off his shirt. he keeps that lust-filled, seductive eye contact throughout him taking off the rest of them, leaving his perfect body in all its glory as he sits on his bed, docile just like you asked.

you move from your spot in front of the wall for the first time, and without any conscious thoughts, your hands are already on him, rubbing his chest before you press kisses to it, “how about i mark you up? would you like that?”

“y/n,” he breathes with that same smile, “you can do whatever you please with me,” every word out of his mouth is enough to wreck any chance of this just being an innocent hook-up because god you need him to be yours. as much as you’re already his, he needs to be yours.

“but do you want me to leave marks?” you ask again.

“i want you to ruin me, baby, of course i do,” he groans as you make your choice to bite down on his collarbone, settling on just leaving one mark for now. you suck on the freshly-bitten skin and kiss it one last time as an apology before moving on, but you can tell from the way his breath picked up that he loves it just as much as you do.

“your body is so perfect, i just want to leave endless love bites, but we’d never get to the main event,” you say as he licks his lips in excitement, “and i can tell by your hard cock that you wanna get there sooner rather than later.”

“what can i say? i’m made to be loved and ruined,” his words once again leave you wrecked. how he always knew exactly what to say to someone like you (who’s not exactly a submissive person) is beyond you.

“and ruined you’ll be, now spread your legs, rest one on my shoulder,” he does as told, placing his right leg on your shoulder and keeping his legs spread wide for you.

you put some lube on your fingers, and glance over at him, just to make sure he’s ready. you work your first finger in there as he makes a face of discomfort, but the second you were about to pull out and try to comfort him, he starts moaning so, so softly, begging under his breath for more.

it’s a bit startling of a change, but it disappears somewhat quickly (not as quick as the first two times) when he gets himself together, “baby,” he murmurs softly, “more.”

“you’re so demanding,” you laugh endearingly, but the change of pace is deceptive; he’s still smirking even with a finger in his ass. you press another finger in, and his breath hitches, but he still manages to recover his composure rather quickly.

your movements are gentle and small at first, but you gradually pick it up, especially when he murmurs, “come on, you can do it harder than that,” he bites but there’s barely any venom in his words. he then has to hold a hand against his mouth to hold back the moan that followed you moving a bit more roughly. you don’t stop him nor do you call him out, but you can see him slipping away. It feels incredible.

“don’t you wanna fuck me now? drag your nails against my skin? pull my hair and make it hurt?”

“be patient,” is all you murmur back in return.

he groans in annoyance this time, pulling himself as close as he can to you, holding onto you to keep himself upright, “why are you trying to resist me? god, you know you want to ruin me, why are you holding back? what do you have to lose by giving in and giving me hell?”

his words leave you shuddering, wrecked with thoughts of him and only him. why were you holding back? because you wanted to not be the only one that’s a complete and utter mess, you wanted to watch him crumble to pieces because you didn’t want to think about how he’s got you so bad, but you’re as compliant with his demands as he is obedient with your orders, “flip over, get on all fours.”

you cover the strap in lube, careful (somewhat) in the way you enter him, slightly enjoying the strained look on his face even if you don’t say a word about it, “you can move now, don’t be gentle with me,” he mumbles, and you’re more than happy to fulfill that request even if he’s still so demanding for someone in his place.

you start to move and his whines become gentle moans as he gets more comfortable with the pace, but you try to be a bit harder and rougher and you also reach your hand around to jerk him off lazily, just for the added stimulation.

“you look so pretty,” the words leave your mouth absentmindedly, and it’s precious to see how everything is starting to affect him more, how he tries desperately to keep himself composed, but his cheeks are flushed and he bites his lip to try and hold back. he’s remarkably good at keeping his cool, but you’ll break him sooner or later. you just have to be patient.

“a-ah, fuck, you can be rougher, i want more, please,” he admits, pushing back onto your strap slightly.

“you’re gonna have to beg for that, baby,” you prompted.

“please! i-i’m pretty when i cry, so make me! i know you think about being so rough with me until i break and j-just sob, just make it happen already! please!” it’s not exactly begging, more just trying to tempt you, but that’s exactly what this boy is: tempting. every part of him naturally pulls you in, keeps you locked against him no matter who’s in control, it’s just something about him that makes him irresistible and it’s infuriating.

but you give in, like always, fucking him harder until you can faintly hear his cries under the sounds of skin hitting skin. even still, he’s not satisfied, “pull my hair,” he breathes, “hurt me.”

you groan but reach your hand out to pull his hair, loving the way he yelps, crying out as you mutter, “my perfect little bubblegum slut, aren’t you, wonho?”

“y-yes!” he whines, shouting out the words you’ve been aching to hear, “fuck, god, i’m yours!”

“then cum for me, baby,” you mumble as his body almost gives in as he pleasure crests and he cums, moaning like the pretty pink whore he is while his tears stain the white pillowcase and he grips the white sheets like his life depends on it. he cries out moans while his cum gets all over your hand and some on the bedsheets.

his body just completely gives in when he cums though, and he can’t hold himself up on his elbows and knees any longer, so he just falls against the bed as you pull out of him, leaving an absolutely wrecked version of the heartbreaking boy that once inhabited that body.

he’s shaking and reeling from his high as you get back on the bed with him, pulling him close to press kisses to his forehead and hoping to provide some sense of comfort as aftercare. his head rests against your chest as he tentatively wraps his arm around your waist.

you whisper, “you’re okay, angel, i’ll take care of you. whatever you want, now,” and though he was already crying, you can tell he starts crying harder, burying his face into your chest so he doesn’t have to face you, “what’s wrong? wonho? are you okay?”

he doesn’t hold back the second he doesn’t have to, “fuck, i think i’m in love with you,” he murmurs, so soft it’s hard to catch. the air is quiet and tense for a few moments, “i think i love you, y/n, i don’t know what to do.”

his confession leaves you speechless. after all this time of pining after the cruel-hearted boy with pink hair and a cute smile, learning that it wasn’t all one-sided feels like a dream.

“i, uhm, i guess you don’t feel the same,” he raises his head to smile at you one last time, but it’s not like the other ones. this one makes you so sad, aching to protect the vulnerable heart of the boy in front of you, “thats... okay. i guess my charms didn’t work as well on you. bummer...”

“i- no, wonho, i do. i do feel the same,” you bring your hand up to run through his hair, and he leans into your touch, “you’ve got me, angel, you had me from the first kiss.”

“at min’s party last year?” he smiles half-heartedly when you nod, “god, i really thought you’d just be another one, but i got so wrapped up in it all myself, so i kept just trying to keep you at arm’s length, but you just persisted and i don’t- i don’t know what to do anymore,” he sighs, adjusting to rest his head on your chest but looking at you this time, “do you, uhm, do you really mean that? you really feel the same? this isn’t just some way to get back at me, right?”

“i’ve spent too much of my time thinking about you and your lips and your body not mean that,” you hear him giggle, and it brings your heart a sense of peace to hear that, “genuinely, i’ve never met someone like you, wonho. you’re so confident and sure of yourself, but you easily became exactly what i wanted and i just didn’t know what hit me.”

“i didn’t know what to expect at minhyuk’s party, when your hands were around my neck, i didn’t expect to love it so much. everyone always wanted me in control, so that’s what i did,” he explains. it feels like he's just babbling at this point, but you still listen to his babbled as you play with his hair, “but i loved how it felt to say those things and to see it all unfold in your eyes, i wanted you to be unable to resist me.”

“well i suppose you were successful in that,” you murmur, holding him close as you, “but, you do realize that i only know that act, right? i’ve fallen for what i can see, but at some point, you’re gonna have to let me fall in love with you.”

he sighs, and you can see the most adorable of pouts on his lips (ah, you’re falling for him already), but he concedes, “i- please don’t break my heart-,” a strong demand coming from him of all people, “-promise me.”

“i promise,” you echo, “i promise.”

—

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bellakitse · 3 years

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You know, when you get all lovey and concerned. Soulful, big brown eyes, it - absolutely wrecks people.

TK ‘the person wrecked by the Carlos’ cow eyes’ Strand

Put this on my tombstone, for I have expired after this scene.

#911 lone star #tarlos #tk x carlos #911 lone star spoilers

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queenielacy · 3 years

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“Soulful, big brown eyes, it - absolutely wrecks people.”

TK means him. He’s the people wrecked by Carlos’s cow eyes

#tarlos #911 lone star #carlos reyes #tk strand

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arse-crack-thistle · 3 years

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quality time

rwrb and the five love languages | part four

in which bea nearly crashes from the stress of party-planning (aroace rep)

Princess Beatrice buzzes around The Masquerade, double-checking place cards, straightening table settings, and pulling dried rose petals from the centerpieces. She rented the concert venue for the night to throw a modern Valentine’s gala to benefit Henry’s queer youth center in London. He and Alex are around here somewhere, probably hooking up in a broom cupboard and definitely not nitpicking every detail like Bea is. Her assistant follows her with a clipboard and updates her on the schedule: t-minus three hours until guests arrive and, in the meantime, she needs to give final approval, soundcheck with the band, and get dressed up. Jeans and a blazer, while royal casual, are not party-appropriate, and tonight needs to be perfect.

She usually hates royal events like galas, but this one is special. Not because it’s Valentine’s Day—Bea could not give two fucks about the holiday—but because ever since coming out as asexual around Christmas, she’s been looking for an opportunity to help other queer people, or at least give them a public figure they could point to and say, “See Mum and Dad, she’s like me.” Henry and Alex got their chance, and now this time, it’s hers.

The stage lights up with pink and red; it’s cheesy, but Bea digs it. The concert was the one thing she would not budge on with her royal event planner. Did she want to reach into wealthy pockets? Yes. Did she still want to have a good time? Hell yes. And the band she’s joining for one night only happens to be just as queer as the charity they’re supporting.

Permanent Record, local to London, tune their instruments on stage. Bea has met them dozens of times over the last month and vibed with them instantly. Margot, the too-cool lead singer always decked out in a leather jacket and Docs, is ace like her, and as much as Bea has wanted to get to know them, there’s been no time. Turns out, party-planning and party-executing steals the host away from all meaningful human connection. She’s only been able to keep up with Henry because he’s partly responsible for this event.

The pit, full of tables covered in pink and gold, finally looks perfect enough for Bea to hand-off any other minute fixes to the planner and finally have her soundcheck with the band. But then, a large crash comes from the back of the venue, and she hears a loud shriek coming from a familiar voice, the one that’s been shrill and disapproving for the last month. When Bea runs up, she sees hundreds of shattered champaign flutes and her planner on the floor, blood oozing from her hands.

This cannot be happening. The only reason Bea kept this woman around was to take most of the day-of duties off her plate. But she’s in the back of an ambulance now, and Henry is nowhere to be found. Bea’s stress levels go from tolerable to unbearable as she orders her assistant to track down replacement flutes. The staff are quick to fill her other requests: a couple of people start sweeping, someone runs off to find her co-host, another tells the band Bea’s soundcheck will be postponed, and a brave soul steps up as a temporary assistant and follows her around the back tables to check for broken glass. Bea knows she doesn’t have to be the one to do this, but it seems like the success of this event lies solely one her shoulders. If something goes wrongs, it’s her face—not Henry’s—in the papers the next day. Powder Princess Crashes and Burns at Gay Ball. Christ.

After an hour, everything is sorted. There’s no glass. The planner is getting stiches. Permanent Record has started their soundcheck and sound amazing. But even their chill indie tunes can’t calm the princess. She needs to get on stage, but her stylist specifically requested she have at least two hours to work his magic, which is not going to happen.

Bea tells her assistant to get her stylist and his team to the venue, because she won’t be able to leave, and warn him he’ll only have an hour at best. Henry and Alex have already taken off to get ready, and she has to remind herself to smack them later for abandoning her.

She tugs off her blazer, drapes it over a chair, and rolls up her sleeves. If she does get her hands on a guitar, she’ll explode. It’s all she can think of to stop her from raiding the bar at the back.

“Better late than never, eh, Princess?” Margot says as she huffs on stage.

One of the stagehands gives Bea her beautiful sleek, black Fender Stratocaster, and her anxiety reduces itself to a hum. Music can’t cure all, but it certainly keeps her from wrecking every good thing in her life.

“Let’s just play,” she says.

But it’s anything but perfect. Whatever chemistry she had with Permanent Record somehow jumped into the Thames between their last rehearsal and now because this is an absolute travesty and she’s only playing two songs with them tonight. She’s forgotten measures of one song and can’t find the chords fast enough in her solo of the other. Utter shit.

Why does she even fucking bother?

She always fucks everything up. Always. Why did she think she could put this on? Sure, she’s chaired these events before, but not ones she actually cares about, not ones she’s actually put her heart into. Christ, no wonder. She should’ve known it would turn out like this. She’s the anti-Midas; everything she touches turns to shit.

No kid will ever see her as a queer role model. She’s the girl they point to and say, “See Mum and Dad, what a waste.”

She needs a hit so fucking bad.

Which is why she has to get out of here ASAP. Before she does anything she’ll regret. She won’t slip again, and she won’t be the reason this gala fails. Henry can handle it without her.

So when Margot calls for a five-minute break, Bea excuses herself and hands off her guitar. On her way out the door, she tells the stagehand to find her assistant and tell her to have Henry take over. The hard part is over thanks to the planner actually being brilliant at her job, even if she and Bea would never get along.

No doubt, cameras are already lined up outside, so she hides in one of the green rooms and locks the door behind her. If she just takes a deep breath and calms down, she can bring herself back from the edge.

Five things she can see: The 1975, Arctic Monkeys, Oasis, Solange, and Fiona Apple’s signatures on the artist wall.

Four things she can feel: the worn leather on a crusty couch, the chipped-paint walls, her toes in her shoes, and her fingers through her light brown hair.

Three things she can hear: the ticking from the clock, the click of her heels as she paces, and a knock at the door.

Two things she can smell: decades-old musk from artists past—no doubt coming from the couch—and her light perfume on her wrist.

One thing she can taste: a hint of coffee from earlier.

She breathes in and out, and the knock on the door continues.

“Bea, are you in there? Could you let me in?” Margot. Essentially a stranger. She supposes it’s better than facing a disappointed Henry, so she opens the door and promptly relocks it as soon as they’re inside.

“Christ, this place is legendary, isn’t it? Everyone’s played here—is that Bob Dylan? Fucking nuts,” Margot says, pointing to the wall.

“I’ve seen loads of people here. Always wanted to play here myself,” Bea tells them. She traces Lizzo’s signature. That was a fun night; Nora and June flew out for a girls’ night, which was ultimately crashed by Pez.

“Me too, and the rest of band as well, I suppose.” Margot looks at Bea and smiles. They’re brown eyes crinkle in the corner, and it reminds her of Alex. “And now we get to, eh, Princess? Couldn’t’ve gotten here without you. The whole world knows Permanent Record now.”

“You could’ve done it without me,” she says. “You will tonight anyway.”

“Hey.” They reach for Bea’s hand. “Everyone has some hiccups before a big gig. It’ll be grand, but only if you’re there. This is your night as much as it is ours or the youth center’s. You have no idea how important it is for your lot to shine a light on causes people shy away from.”

That makes Bea smile. For so long she wanted to hide from her position. She wanted freedom to do whatever she pleased, but now she understands the power she has, even if people still see her as “The Powder Princess.” No matter what she wears, millions of fashion influencers share links to her clothes. If she walks into a restaurant, their yearly profits skyrocket. When she told the world she was ace, thousands of people messaged her and said the same. One of them was Margot, telling her about their undiscovered band from South London.

She tells Margot how that was one of the first times she really felt like herself. Completely at peace with who she is. How that peace got away from her and turned this gala into a near-panic-attack-inducing event, she doesn’t know.

“Have you let on how stressed you’ve been to anyone?” Margot asks. The two sit together on the couch after Margot bravely plopped themself down on the dirty, old thing.

“Hadn’t the time,” she says. Truthfully, Bea doesn’t think she’s had a genuine conversation with anyone since the gala’s conception.

Margot throws their hands in the air. “Well, there you go then! You’ve got to take the time! To take care of yourself. To hang out with your mates. Just to have some goddamn fun, Bea! Come on! You think I’d be a functioning human if I didn’t let loose with my mates every now and then? This—” They gesture to their body, covered in tattoos and tattered black clothing. “Doesn’t happen on its own.”

Bea laughs. It’s been so long since she’s laughed from anything other than stress. “Right, so how does this all happen then?” She swirls her hand in Margot’s direction.

As they chat, Bea relaxes. They talk about their families and uni and music and coming out. Bea tells Margot about the time she and the gang went to the karaoke bar where Henry got wasted and sang Queen horrifically. Margot tells her about the time in year twelve when they got dared to try out for the school play and ended up playing an old man in the most unbelievable bald cap.

Eventually, the two of them pull out their phones and play a few games of Among Us until Bea’s desperate assistant finds her and pleads for her to get ready though the door. They only have an hour before guests arrive.

“You all right?” Margot asks. “Want to go out there and try again?”

Funny how it doesn’t seem so scary anymore. How it only took a short break, a nice chat, and a little pink astronaut to put Bea at ease. She smiles. The notes come back to her fingertips.

check out the rest of my rwrb and the five love languages series: part one, part two, part three, and part five. (links to come as they’re released)

listen, my permanent headcanon is aroace bea and you will never convince me otherwise and i will never write her as anything else bc i love her so much!! (that being said, if you ship her with anyone, i totally understand). also, i reference a fic of mine i wrote for winterfest so if you want to check out my version of bea’s coming out, you can do that here! and finally, i know this wasn’t a romantic fic for romance week but like i said in part one, valentine’s day is different for everyone. <3

rwrb romance week | @rwrb-fests

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britonell · 4 years

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For @inukag-week 2020!

A short and sweet follow-up to Hermit’s Haven, and this time Inuyasha encounters a different kind of visitor...

Rated T for Inuyasha’s swearing.

Hermit’s Dilemma

Inuyasha stared at the cub, trying to ignore the distinct sense of déjà vu.

The Ezo brown bears were pretty common around these parts, at least enough to be a minor nuisance during deer hunting season, but they were almost always adult males. The only time he had come this close to a cub was when he had followed the village fishermen to the waterfalls and a female and her cubs had joined their group, apparently using the men’s presence to shake off a hostile male bear. This time there was no mama bear, just a lone cub.

Said bear cub sat on his furry little haunches, peering up at the dog-eared man.

Wasn’t this the same place where he first spotted Hachi?

More importantly, what the hell was a bear cub doing all on his own, and so damn close to his house? Shouldn’t this scrawny little guy be in a cozy den with his mother, dozing off until spring?

Inuyasha looked around once more, ears flicking back. Nope, no other bears nearby. Perhaps the mother had gone out to scavenge for acorns one last time and had been struck by a vehicle, or wandered into some other residential area and met the business end of a rifle.

Well fuck-a-doodle-doo.

That was how Inuyasha found himself crossing the icy bridge with a bear cub in his arms, making his way to—

Wait a minute, there’s no way the dogs would stay calm if he showed up with a squirming bear cub. Maybe he could hand him off to Miroku, that guy probably knew more about bears. Crap, was it even legal to bring a bear cub indoors? His residence was technically a shelter, would his non-profit get in trouble? It’s not like he was going to keep the cub. He should head to the agricultural school ASAP, there had to be staff members with experience in handling wild animals.

He froze mid-step and the curious cub glanced up at him.

Shit, shit, shit, he couldn’t go to the school now, Kagome was picking up her mother and grandfather from the airport and she had made him promise, multiple times, that he would be in the village to greet them when they arrived.

He would stay put, he had assured her. He knew how important this was for her, considering she hadn’t gone back to Tokyo for Christmas. He wasn’t gonna disappear like a coward. Not like he cared if city folks visited his village. It’s not like they were the same people that drove him and his mother out of their old apartment. It wasn’t a problem.

Really.

The bear cub let loose a shrill squeal and Inuyasha nearly flung the cub up into the air before stopping himself. Instead, he held the cub in front of him like a ticking bomb.

Did he need milk? Could bears drink cow milk? Maybe he was cold. Did he need to put him in his jacket? Maybe the cub was scared. Should he swaddle him? Kagome did say he had a knack for swaddling the dogs. The chihuahuas usually liked it. And once the bear quieted down he could hide him in a spare room until morning. Right, this would work. Absolutely. Totally.

Mind made up, he went up to Miroku’s house and slid the kitchen window open.

“Yo, keep an eye on the dogs, will ya?” Inuyasha shouted, making sure to keep the bear out of sight. If what he was doing was against the law, he wasn’t going to drag anyone else into legal trouble.

Miroku poked his head into the hallway. “Gotcha! And for goodness’s sake, use the front door.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Inuyasha grumbled. They both knew that wasn’t going to happen. Miroku could just as easily install a lock on the old window, but Inuyasha had a feeling he never would. Miroku had been insistent on not altering the original design of the house.

That was...nice.

“Hi Inuyasha!” Sango called from somewhere down the hall. “We made yakidango earlier. Do you want some?”

“Uh...maybe later. Thanks.” Inuyasha gingerly closed the window and stepped back.

Yeah. That was nice too. The elderly villagers used to offer him food. They were being neighborly, or so they claimed.

Not that Sango was a neighbor. Yet. He knew she was looking at a couple of houses. That fox demon from the agricultural school, Shippo, was probably going to move in soon.

The bear squealed again, prompting Inuyasha to quicken his pace.

Kagome’s front door was unlocked, as usual. He had told her to start locking the door but no one here really worried about security, what with him and all the dogs running around. She had at least promised to lock the door...after making a key for him.

Fuck, he was not blushing at the thought.

He stomped into the living room and rummaged through her dresser until he pulled out a fluffy pink blanket.

Wrap the blanket around like this, tuck the paws in here, rub his head like so, pat his tummy to soothe him, and voila. Inuyasha examined his handiwork with a satisfied grin, which wilted a little at the realization that he was too adept at this.

The bear peeked up over the edge of the blanket and eyed him, as if waiting for something. Inuyasha hoped he wasn’t expecting a lullaby. Then again, Kagome did say music can calm down dogs in stressful situations.

He reached for Kagome’s iPad and scrolled for a while. Hmm, this would do.

Kuma Sanbiki

He sat down cross-legged on the floor and held the bear burrito close to his chest, mumbling the same lyrics that he used to sing with his mother.

Kuma sanbiki issho ni sunde,

Papa kuma, mama kuma, akachan kuma—

“Eep!”

Inuyasha froze and slowly looked up. Kagome was doubled over, shoulders trembling, hands covering her face. He would’ve thought she was in pain if he didn’t catch a delighted giggle. A woman who was clearly her mother stood by the entrance, one hand resting on a suitcase and the other over her heart, watching the bundle in his arms with dewy eyes.

“What’s all this then?” An elderly man walked in, kicking his shoes off in a huff. “Don’t just stand there, we need to—young man, you’re holding the baby wrong.”

Inuyasha could do nothing but sit still and watch the elderly man saunter up to him.

“Now see here, if you want to calm a young one—that’s a bear.”

“What?” the woman, henceforth known as Mama Higurashi in his head, said.

“A bear?” Kagome chortled, her face still red.

Busted.

“Err…” Three sets of eyes were on him. “I found a bear cub,” he finally confessed.

Word got out pretty quickly, mainly because Kagome ran out to get Miroku’s expensive camera equipment “for that money shot,” and both Miroku and Sango came over to greet the guests as well as take a look at the bear cub.

“I can’t believe you swaddled a bear!” Kagome giggled, hours after the fact.

“Bear cub,” Inuyasha corrected, his forehead firmly planted on his kotatsu. It had been decided that Sango would watch the cub for the night and bring the bear to the school in the morning, because apparently the school’s resident bear expert was her uncle.

Stupid, Inuyasha thought. Stupid, stupid, stupid, he should’ve just brought the cub to Sango in the first place. Stupid.

“I can’t wait to get those pictures on my laptop.”

He lifted his head to glare at her. “So you can laugh at me some more?”

“I wasn’t laughing at you!”

“Uh-huh.”

She scooted over to snuggle up to him, ignoring his sputtering protests and unflattering comparisons to Pen-Pen. “I was losing it because it was too adorable for my little ol’ heart. You’re gonna make a girl faint with your paternal instincts.”

He tried really, really hard not to let her words, or the way she was twirling his forelock, affect him. “Yeah, sure. OK.”

“But you know,” she said with a coy smile. “I do have a confession.”

Inuyasha glanced at her suspiciously.

“I would’ve preferred seeing you holding a baby. My baby.”

He didn’t remember much after that because his brain short-circuited and he went on autopilot.

(Kagome inwardly cursed. Asking Miroku on how to confess like a wrecking ball had not been one of her best ideas.)

The bombshells didn’t end there, though. The next morning, after joining the Higurashi family for breakfast, he was helping Mama Higurashi wash the dishes when she nonchalantly proved just how much her daughter took after her.

“You should’ve joined us for dinner last night. Grandpa and I had a question and Kagome had no idea what the answer was.”

“Oh,” was Inuyasha’s reply.

“I’m sure it’s something my daughter has been wondering about for a while.”

“Ah.” Not freaking out, Inuyasha mentally repeated over and over again.

“And, I must admit, I would like to know as well. This is a good time to ask, don’t you think? No need to be modest when you answer.”

“Umm…” Sirens blared in his head.

“Which do you prefer,” she said airily, “small weddings or big weddings?”

~*~

AN: The Higurashi women sure love to drop bombshells. Inuyasha’s soul temporarily left the mortal plane of existence. He’ll be fine.

For the children’s song I had to decide between what Inuyasha ultimately chose or this one: Mori no Kuma-san. I’m more familiar with the latter but I figured the song about the bear family was more appropriate for the situation.

Also, Inuyasha waiting for Kagome is essentially the Patrick waiting for SpongeBob scene. Oh Inuyasha, you poor, hopeless puppy.

#inukag week day 3 #inuyasha #inukag #kagome #inukag week #fanfic #fanart #my fic #my art #fanfic au

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lonestarpost · 3 years

Text

May 10, 2021~ Masterlist ~ Issue 14

The Edits Edit

Some of the best edits this week that deserve all the love.

I’M NOT LIVING WITH MY DAD, LIKE, PERMANENTLY, AM I? by @pendragonsandbuckleys is an amazing gifset that shows the best of TK and Owen’s relationship. It’s beautifully done!

You think they’re soulful? Shut up by @futures-tense is amazing fanart of Carlos “Cow Eyes” Reyes, and he really does have cow eyes, huh?

duality by @tarlosstrand really shows Tarlos being tended in a way that makes me heart flutter.

#appreciation post for carlos and this Look in 2.11 feat. Arms by @rafasilvas is a gifset of Carlos that I’m sure we’re all looking respectfully at.

2.01 x 2.11 → for anon by @strandtk shows Tarlos trying to deal with their forgetfulness and group gatherings!

CARLOS REYES and TK STRAND in 9-1-1: Lone Star l 2x11 by @bucktks shows competitive duo, TK and Carlos, so well. Also, check out this one featuring Carlos’ parents or this one with Marjan and Paul.

And to be an impartial witness in case this goes sideways. by @shoenaerts showcases a great Paul and Marjan moment that just feels so good, and the gifs are so wonderfully done. This Nancy one is also amazing.

Whatever you do, do not give her the Carlos cow eyes. The Carlos cow eyes? You know when you get all lovey and concerned. Soulful, big, brown eyes, it… absolutely wrecks people. You think they’re soulful? Shut up. by @devildrusje is one of the most breathtaking gifsets I’ve seen.

Marjan Marwani by @reyeslonestar is a gorgeous sketch of Marjan, and I love it dearly.

tk & carlos || temporary love [+2x08] by @parawhotai is a great Tarlos video!

Charles is thinking about putting it on the menu.Oh! Ok, you said menu, what menu? by @911dawnstar is a great moment from the dinner between the Ryders and Vegas. Also check out this one that showcases the family bond of the 126.

Oh, my God, they’re going to win again! by @audreyhrnes is a lovely Tarlos gifset that shows the romantic nuances of their relationship.

Nancy: It’s all over anyways. Unless Marjan draws another knight card, and what are the odds of that?Marjan: *proceeds to draw another knight card* by @yusufsalkaysanis shows some of the things that make me love Marjan so much.

MARJAN MARWANI in 9-1-1: Lone Star Season 2 — SLOW BURN by @buckleys-diaz shows some important Marjan Marwani moments, and it is amazing.

Fic Recs

Some of the best fics of the week.

i’ve got you by @thatnerdemryn ( thatnerdemryn )

Word Count: 936

Chapters: 1/1

“Marj, what’s going on?” Nancy said softly as she finally reached Marjan. When she was close enough, she took the risk, grabbing for Marjan’s shaking hands and pulling them to her chest. Marjan opened her eyes at the contact and when she finally caught sight of Nancy, a choked sob escaped her perfectly painted lips.

guide me back (I’m lost without your light) by @rafasilvas ( boneswrites )

Word Count: 10128

Chapters: 1/1

“All available units respond to a 10-50 at the intersection of Sixth and North Lamar Boulevard. Multiple vehicle pile up.” “Dispatch, this is 363-H-20 responding. ETA three minutes.” When Carlos and Mitchell respond to the call, the last thing Carlos expects is to find TK in the middle of the wreck. He races against time to keep TK awake and stable until fire and medical arrive, while sending out prayer after prayer that his time with TK hasn’t been cut short. That they haven’t run out of time.

the gravity in between us by @lire-casander ( Lire_Casander )

Word Count: 1582

Chapters: 1/1

once captain strand leaves, they go back to unpacking, but an unexpected memory throws tk off kilter

if every breath is sacred by @morganaspendragonss ( hollyhobbit101 )

Word Count: 2104

Chapters: 1/1

When Carlos wakes up, flames and smoke are filling the room, but TK is nowhere to be seen. He knows the protocols for being in a fire: sit tight, stay low to the ground, wait for help to arrive. But, it’s TK. Protocols have always gone straight out of the window when it comes to TK. So, Carlos— Well, Carlos does probably the stupidest thing he’s ever done in his life. He grabs two t-shirts from a drawer, holds one over his mouth and nose, and plunges into the inferno.

Fandom News

Hosting events? Have important announcements? You’re welcome to bring them here to keep people in the know.

Events

911 & 911 Lone Star AU Weekend

From June 25-28, 2021 there will be an AU weekend for 911 and 911 Lone Star!

Prompts for Fic Writers:

June 25, 2021 - Day 1: “This is the job I was meant to do.” - Different career path

June 26, 2021 - Day 2: “I didn’t expect to see someone like you here.” - Different first meeting

June 27, 2021 - Day 3: It didn’t have to end up like this - change a situation in canon

June 28, 2021 Day 4: Writer’s choice

Prompts for Artists:

June 25, 2021 - Day 1: First Meeting

June 26, 2021 - Day 2: Soulmate AU

June 27, 2021 - Day 3: Break a canon event

June 28, 2021 Day 4: Artists choice

#911 lone star #lone star post #issue 14

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thewalkingfanfictions · 4 years

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Teddy Bears and Memories -- Sam Winchester x Male!Reader

Teddy Bears and Memories — Sam Winchester x Male!reader

Description: (name) and his little sister are partnering with the Winchester brothers on a case. Everything's fine and dandy, they've already killed the creature and are hanging out at the motel for the night, when Maddie ((names) sister) decides to pull a prank on her brother, resulting in aggressive flashbacks, intense PTSD and a moose ready to comfort a crying friend.

⚠Warning⚠: IF YOU GET TRIGGERED EASILY, DO NOT READ THIS. This deals with descriptions of rape, (though I tried to keep it vague) PTSD, flashbacks, and a kinda sorta mental breakdown. Cursing, grammar errors, and also quite a lot of negative and toxic thoughts.

Genre: angst, hurt/comfort

Pairing: Sam Winchester x sexually abused!male!reader

A/N: this is... kinda awful. Like, it made me cold reading this. Seriously don't read it if you get triggered easily. Also, the first, like, quarter, I wrote in a huge hurry, so ignore how trash it is. And its kinda writen shitily, but whatever.

Words without A/N: 4382

Masterlist

<—————————————>

"You gotta watch this," it was my sister. I would recognize her voice anywhere, even though she was whispering and clearly trying to keep me from hearing her. "He's terrified of them, its hilarious."

I wonder who she's dragging with her this time.

Deciding to let her continue to think she was sneaking up on me, I kept quiet and never moved my eyes from the lore book that I'd been studying for the past half hour. Though the case was over now, I still figured it would be a good idea to learn as much as I could about the Leeds' Devil, that way I'd know how to deal with it if we ever ran into another.

I could hear her creeping up on me, thinking I still didn't know she was there. There was another pair of footsteps with her. One of the brothers, no doubt.

It was quiet for just half a second, and I figured she'd be popping up in just a moment to try and jump scare me or something. You know, typical younger sibling style.

"He's terrified of them, its hilarious."

Wait.

There was a quiet, girlish giggle, and I'm sure my eyes grew double their size as I figured out exactly what she was doing.

I flung my head to the side to see if she was going to do the thing I thought she was going to do (and desperately hoped she wasn't going to do), and immediately choked on air.

Tiny, beady eyes set high on soft brown fur. Little, round ears on top of a fluffy head.

No.

Rancid, green breath, so-brown-they're-almost-black eyes, sticky fingers touching places they should never be allowed to touch. Bookshelves full of teddy bears looking down on me with empty eyes and sown-on smiles.

I felt my entire body seize up, and before I could make myself come back down to earth, I was hurling the book in my hands at the furry little demon-bear in my little sisters hands and rolling off of the bed and to the floor. Flight-or-fight reflexes kicking in, I shoved myself back to my feet and fled towards the doorway. Away from the sound of heavy breathing and old-people BO that suddenly overwhelmed me.

And then it was in front of me, too.

Maddie, with that little ball of fluff and nightmare fuel in her hands, had darted ahead of me, between me and the only exit from the hotel room.

No.

Callased, rough hands, man-handeling me and shoving me onto my knees. Cold cuffs digging into my small wrists. Boiling breath ghosting over my too-cold skin. Hundreds of eyes staring at me from the shelves around us, none willing to help.

Fucking no.

Fighting past the urge to break into tears, I swatted the thing away from me, and (maybe a little too harshly) shoved my sister out of the way of the door.

"(Name)?" She called, like she didn't know what she was doing to me.

I locked eyes with someone for half a second, Sam, I think before I was out the door and down the sidewalk, towards my (favorite color) Chevrolet.

I heard Maddie call out for me one more time before the car door slammed closed, and I was taking off parallel to the sunset.

Before I even left the parking lot, I clicked on the radio and turned it up to its max volume. If I couldn't hear myself think, then I couldn't see the little black, beetly-like eyes boring into me as my youth died.

I don't exactly know how long I was driving, but somehow I found myself parked at a view point above the town, and the sky was now completely black, not even a hint of the sunset that had shined what felt like just a moment ago.

There were no lights to pollute the darkness of the sky, and the stars shown more brightly than I'd seen in a very long time. Shutting off the Chevrolet's engine, I pulled myself out of the door, and drug my body atop it's hood to look up at the sky. It's amazing how little I'd payed attention to how gorgeous the stars could be before now.

I settled back into the windshield and exhaled, forcing myself not to think for once. It only felt like moments, but it had to have been at least an hour I had sat there, and my arms were beginning to grow goosebumps from the cold. Wrapping them around me, I continued to study the sky; I didn't want to have to go back to the real world just yet.

Emotions were hard. They're difficult to understand, and even more difficult to explain. But something I had realized, I'm not entirely sure when, was that you can suffer from more than one emotion at a time, and that made life so, so much worse. Because, right now, I felt incredibly heavy. I was mourning the death of an innocence I never had the chance to get to know, and I felt completely devastated. Wrecked to my very core. But, underneath all of that, some stupid, small bubble of something resembling happiness, a feeling that had absolutely no right to be present now, grew just under my ribcage, and weaseled its way passed the smog of memories as the gravel behind me shifted with the wheels of a car, and the purring of the Impala's engine broke the relative quiet of the night.

I doubted it was Dean, he's never been very good at emotions, and it was definitely not my sibling, she knew to leave me alone when I needed quiet. That left Sam, and the thought of seeing the ridiculously tall man made my insides flutter cliché-ly.

I closed my eyes and followed the sound of the drivers side door opening, his feet planting on the pine needle-layden gravel. The soft close of the door, his steps growing, ever, nearer. Soon enough he was right by the drivers side of my car, and I could feel his eyes boring into the side of my face. I knew he had questions, but I just wasn't ready to tell.

"(Name)?" His voice was quiet, gentle. Barely a whisper. Like if he spoke to loudly he might shatter me like glass.

"Hey, you okay?" His steps were now right beside me, I could almost feel the warmth fluttering off of him.

'Not even a little.'

I nodded in response, not really trusting my voice to work without breaking. Finally opening my eyes, I refused to look over at him, instead opting to stare up at Ursa and her cub.

"Your sister," he started. Here we go. "She's worried about you. When you didn't pick up your cell, she was afraid something'd happened to you."

"Something did," I wanted to say. I wanted to scream, rant, and sob. But, of course, "I'm fine" was what passed my lips instead. The words sounded fake, even to my own ears.

I heard him sigh as he leaned closer, settling his hip against the hood of the car and staring down at me. I clenched my eyes closed; this is usually right around the time that someone would start asking questions with answers I didn't want to think about, or comment something snide about my stupid, irrational fear.

That bubble of happiness at his being there shrank.

"What do you want?" I asked, barely loud enough to be heard. I didn't care if I sounded rude.

It was silent for a second, like he was debating his answer, or just didn't have one.

"I," he paused, "I guess I just want to help you," his tone matched mine. "I saw the look in your eyes, (name), I know whatever it is, it's more than just a fear. I want to help you."

I was actually, truly speechless for once. He sounded so sincere, it was more than even my sister had expressed. Not that she'd ever actually shown any concern, she just thought it was funny that her big bro was terrified of teddy bears.

I couldn't tell him, of course, he'd just think me even weaker than he probably already assumed after seeing me have a meltdown over a fucking stuffed carnival toy. I shook my head.

"I'm fine."

"(Name)," he trailed off, his voice somehow even softer than it was before.

I wanted to tell him. I wanted to scream it at the top of my lungs just to get it off of my chest. It's a secret I've held since I was barely fourteen. Nobody knew, and I needed it to stay that way, but desperately wanted the pressure to come off of my chest. I don't know how much longer I can keep my silence.

I trusted him, that was never a problem. I trusted him with my life, and I knew he'd never hurt me with the knowledge, but it was still a huge risk. What if Maddie ever found out? I'd be devastated. She didn't need to know how pathetic her big brother was.

I felt words bubble up in my throat without my consent, spilling from my lips like molten rock.

"If," I started, clearing my throat to hide the break in my voice, "if I, uh, if I were to tell you somethin', would you promise me that you'll never tell another soul?" I sounded nothing like myself, even to me. "You can't...my sister can't ever know. She's-she's-she... she wouldn't understand." My voice was barely above a whisper, and cracked on every other note.

"Of-of course!" Sam said earnestly, moving to sit atop the hood beside me. I could see his hand move to grasp my shoulder, but pulled back at the last minute, afraid to touch me lest I break. I didn't blame him.

"Promise?"

I turned my head to look at him and wrapped my arms tighter around my body; whether it was to ward off the cold, or the oncoming pain, I didn't even know.

"Of course, (name), I wouldn't tell anybody, I promise."

Only after searching his eyes for his honesty did I let myself relax some. I trusted that he'd keep his word.

He looked slightly uncomfortable with the way his lanky frame was leant over the edge of the cars hood, like he was stuck on the fence between moving to comfort me and giving me my space. I sarcastically rolled my eyes, scooting over enough for him to climb on more comfortably. He warily pushed himself further up, then lay on his back to look up at the stars like I was. I finally turned my gaze away from him and focused back on the night sky.

They really were pretty out here.

"When I was," I gulped and paused. Not even the person I trusted the most in this world knew; I still can't grasp why I'm about to do what I'm about to do. Maybe it was the bubbling in my gut that told me that he'd understand, maybe I was just weak, maybe I just didn't want to be the only one with this secret anymore.

I made myself start again.

"When I was about fourteen, I was on a hunt with my father. There had been multiple disappearances of children around this one little area in Minnesota, and we had gone to check it out. It was terrible. The youngest kid was nine, and the oldest was fifteen and they'd all disappeared without a trace. No signs of struggle, no witnesses, nothing. Just, poof," I moved my hands to mimic an explosion, for some reason, "and they were gone.

"The local authorities believed it was a person kidnapping them, dad thought it was something else, understandably. Most of the evidence pointed towards something less-than normal. For once, the popo's were right." I laughed ruefully at myself, biting my tongue to keep the whimper that threatened to fight its way up my throat from escaping.

"I don't know how it happened," I cleared my throat and continued. "I don't remember getting split up from dad, I don't remember hi-him grabbing me, I don't even remember the drive there, but when I woke up, I," I choked, pulling my arms closer around me and trying in vain to hold back the burning in my eyes.

"I, uhm, I was," I tried again, with no more luck than before. Strong arms hesitantly wrapped around my shoulders, pulling me into a warm side and gently petting my hair. I cleared my throat again.

"I was completely naked, tie-tied to a bench in a room with shelves from floor to ceiling completely," I choked on my words again, turning to bury myself into Sam's chest. I could still see the room if I closed my eyes. "entirely covered in, in, in, those things. Teddy bears. Their beady little black eyes looking down at me as I struggled against the ropes. I was so-so helpless, I couldn't move, or scream, or-or-or–" he pulled me tighter into him, his hand playing in the strands of my hair. I sucked in a deep breath and held it for a second before letting it out, trying to calm myself.

Why couldn't I just stop talking? He didn't want to hear any of this. I'm just annoying him, he'd rather be back at the warm motel with a book and slightly more mentally stable people. And yet I keep going.

"He... he raped me, Sammy, he fucking raped me and all of those teddy bears sat there with their beady little black eyes staring at me." I felt him tense against me, somehow pulling me even closer still. A small, ragged gasp came from the man. "Nobody found me for three days. He had raped and beaten and-and-and hurt me for three fucking days before he tried to take me out to kill me and dump my body, and dad found us. Three fu-fucking days," I was all but sobbing at this point, clinging on to him as I saw the walls covered in children's toys closing in on me. If I let my mind wander, I could still feel his hands groping me. I felt so small.

"(Name)," Sam shuddered against me, gently petting my shoulder as he held my quaking body. "(Name), I had no idea, I'm so–"

"Don't say you're sorry. Please don't say you're sorry. It's not like its somehow your fault. It sounds like pity, and I don't want your pity," I ground out into his warm chest, not letting go of him.

I didn't need anyone's pity, and I sure as hell didn't want anyone's pity. I felt him nod his head above me, before his long body turned on the hood of the car, and he pulled me tightly into his chest as the rest of him curled around my shaking frame.

I couldn't quite tell if the pressure in my chest was good or not.

I'm not sure how long we sat like that, cuddled on the hood of my car, but eventually, once my sobs subsided and I was brought back into the real world for a minute, I came to realize quite how cold it had gotten. It was still only March, and the nights were still cold, and the goosebumps told me I needed to get inside and get warm, but my mind wanted to stay there for just a bit longer. I didn't want to have to let go of the warmth and comfort that billowed off of Sam like hot air, and I don't think I could have forced myself to let go even if I wanted to. So, in all reality, it shouldn't have come as so much of a surprise when I felt my sleep-heavy body being picked up off of the cold metal of my Chevy.

"Sam?" My voice was low and hoarse from spending so long choked full of emotion, and I felt a little jolt of embarrassment run over my body.

Looking up, I could see it was him, but he didn't say a word, simply shooting a soft smile at me before looking back up to watch where he was walking. Not having the energy to try and determine what was going on, I buried my face in his chest and let my body relax farther in his grip. It was only when I felt him open a door that I looked up. Gently setting me in the passenger seat of his brothers Impala, he threw his coat over me before smiling again. Reaching out hesitantly, he ran the tips of his fingers over the side of my face, an action which I immediately found myself leaning into. His brows squinted tightly like he was thinking hard about something. Without even thinking about it, I reached out and smoothed the wrinkles between his brows with the pad of my thumb.

Locking eyes, I finally took notice to just how gorgeous his iris' were. Green and brown and hazel and gold swirling together like liquid fire. Said eyes darted away suddenly, and I somehow knew he was looking at my lips. Mine darted down to his for a moment as well.

I wanted that. Gol, I wanted that.

He leaned forward slightly, and I actually thought he would go for it. He drug his bottom lip between his teeth in debate before moving his eyes to focus somewhere behind my head and stood back up.

Fucking really?

Smiling down at me again, this time making it look almost sad, he tucked the jacket he had previously thrown over my body around me tighter. As he stood and moved himself around to the other side of the car to get in, my gaze tracked him all the way.

He didn't look at me as he started the car and shifted into gear, and the profile of his face held worry. Had I done something wrong somehow? He probably thinks you're weak for what you told him.

As he pulled away from the view point, I watched the back end of my car get farther and farther away.

"My car..." I whispered pitifully, I didn't want to leave it. I didn't actually think Sam had heard me, but evidently, he did.

"I'll pick it up tomorrow. It'll be safe 'till then."

And then he went quiet again. How did I manage to fuck this up, too?

Biting my lip, I curled in on myself, cuddled Sam's jacket to my chest, and let the purr of the engine lul me to sleep.

This time when I woke up in his arms, I made a point of keeping my eyes closed and my breathing steady. We were through the doors before I realized where we were.

The hotel smelled just the same as it had before. Beer nuts, sex, and mothballs. It certainly didn't help the painful rolling in my stomach.

I'd managed to ruin this relationship, too. How was I so good at that? I shouldn't have told him, he didn't need to hear, didn't want to hear. Now he thinks I'm some pathetic little wimp who couldn't so much as protect himself from a human. You fuck everything up, (name).

Somewhere in the back of my self-piteous mind, I was vaguely aware of someone speaking.

The more I tuned in, the more I wished I hadn't.

"—uck happened!? Is he okay?! What'd you do!" Came the accusational voice of my little sister.

Of course she'd have to see you like this. Pathetic. Now she'll surely think as badly of you as Sam does. What the fuck is wrong with you? Can you at least try not to break something for more than ten seconds?

"He's fine," rumbled Sam's voice from beneath my ear, "just tired. He fell asleep on the way here. Just– just leave him to himself for a bit, okay? He's had a rough night."

His tone was somber. His tone conveyed sadness and sadness meant pity and pity meant uncomfortable glances and tense silence and hesitant avoidance of touching. Of course you had to fuck up one of the only good things going for you. Good fucking job. Pathetic.

He was moving again (or maybe he'd never stopped in the first place) and I immediately felt the drop in temperature as he walked with me through the joint door to him and his brothers room. Dean must have been out somewhere, as I didn't hear his voice or feel his stare.

There was a bit more shuffling as he carried me to the bed, and I just don't understand how his arms aren't tired out yet. Soon, he's gently setting me down on the bed, and I'm so grateful that I'd managed to keep myself passing as asleep, because I don't know if I could handle the awkward not-conversation that was sure to follow.

I follow the sound of his feet leaving the room, and wait for the soft closing of the door before I let myself fall apart again. I put a hand over my mouth to muffle the sobs and curl into myself, wrapping one arm around my chest to try and hold off the pressure that's filling my ribcage.

Pathetic.

Weak.

Are you really crying right now?

You're such a pussy.

Why did you have to tell him that shit?

Now he thinks you're even more of a quivering quim than he thought before.

You can't go a day without destroying at least one relationship, can you?

How sad.

I don't really know how long I sat there and cried pathetically into my fist, but at some point my sobs turned to cries, which morphed into sniffles, and eventually evened into silent, hot, tears.

I was almost fading off again when I heard the door open again.

The hunter side of me wanted to immediately reach for a gun, but the realistic side of me told me that it was just one of the Winchester's coming to grab something from the room, or maybe Sam coming to check on me. Hah. Funny. However, when I felt the bed dip beside me, I couldn't help but tense up and open my eyes.

They were on the other side of my body, my back was to them. I was just on the verge of flipping around and sucker punching whoever it was, when a sudden, soft heat draped over me. A blanket.

Somehow, I knew it was Sammy.

For few quiet moments, we sat in companionable silence. I could feel his eyes on me the entire time, though I couldn't quite tell if it was the judging glare that I expected or not. After a good couple of minutes, I felt the bed shift again as he stood up, and I thought I heard him mumble something under his breath as he did, but I couldn't quite make out his words.

I immediately missed his presence as he moved back towards the door.

Why had I said anything in the first place? He didn't care, he didn't need to care. He probably feels so uncomfortable now. I probably made him so uncomfortable hugging him like I did, crying into his shirt. He probably hates me.

As the door cracked open, I found myself sitting up suddenly, "I'm sorry," I blurted.

He paused in the doorway, and turned to look back at me. I immediately averted my gaze, instead choosing to stare at his boots as I wiped my face of any remaining tears.

"I'm sorry," this time it was softer, a bit more broken.

The door clicked closed, and he was walking back towards me. Seating himself at the edge of the mattress, close enough that I knew he was there, but far enough away that he wasn't making me uncomfortable, he reached out and gently held one of my hands in both of his large ones. I guess he probably expected me to look up at him at that point, but I couldn't make myself look him in the eye, knowing that I'd only see that godawful pity, or worse, he'd see the tears that still threatened my eyes.

It wasn't until his hands left mine, and traveled up to my face that I looked at him, and was met with an expression I definitely wasn't expecting. His eyes were so, so soft. His face not full of pity, as I'd expected, but instead, some gentle version of understanding. A caring, almost loving look came to him as he wiped away the tear that managed to escape, soothing the red tenderness that came from the last however-long of crying.

As if he knew what I had been thinking a few moments before, his face again morphed expressions. A small, sad smile pulled at his lips, and he shook his head softly, "you aren't that at all," I could almost hear him say, though his lips never parted for the words.

His eyes once again glanced down, and, once again, I imediately knew he was looking at my lips. He leaned forward slightly, as he had in the Impala, but this time, instead of pulling away, he chose to look further into my eyes, like he was seeking permission.

A small nod, a painfully slow movement, soft, warm lips pressed gently against mine.

I sighed contentedly and leaned farther into him. The kiss was but a close-lipped peck, really, but somehow it spoke more than I'm sure a full kiss would have.

After a moment, he pulled away, thumbs grazing slightly at my cheekbones, and I found that I couldn't bring myself to open my eyes once again, but this time, for an entirely different reason.

~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours later, Dean Winchester walked into his and his brothers shared room, only to find said brother's long body curled up tightly beside (name)'s.

A quiet "finally" echoed through the air as the eldest brother turned back and left the room, deciding he could handle sleeping on the couch in the other room if it meant his brother could have at least one good night of rest.

*fin*

#Sam Winchester #Sam Winchester x reader #Sam Winchester x Male reader #Sam Winchester x Male reader angst #Sam Winchester x male reader hurt/comfort #Sam Winchester x reader angst #Sam Winchester x reader hurt/comfort #Reader needs a hug #abused reader #victim reader #Sam comforting reader #angst to fluff #this is just kinda really sad #rape trigger warning #Teddy Bears and Memories

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clareisa · 5 years

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Monsta X Reaction: Things you do that turn him on (M)

Awww, I’m really happy that you liked the Ateez post, and I’m thankful for your request. Hope you’ll like this one too♥

- gifs are not mine, credits to rightful owners

- English is not my first language, so please let me kindly know if I did a mistake

Shownu:

Your ladylike behaviour. I mean that Hyunwoo loves when you are just walking and acting with grace and confidence. You are not afraid of anyone insulting you or you care less about uneducated people’s opinions. He loves how can you be so elegant and look so powerful. He is speechless when your strong aura could turn everyone's heads.

You were going to an award show tonight and your boyfriend Hyunwoo decided to take you with him. When Hyunwoo saw you in full glam he couldn’t believe that this is his partner.

“You are divine.” he sighed and couldn’t stop looking at you. You thanked him with a wide smile on your face and you both get into the car. When you get off you was already sucked in the atmosphere and you were enjoying this event like no one other. You cheered for the boys from the side while they were on the red carpet. When they come back one photographer asked if you and Hyunwoo could pose together on the carper as well.

“You don’t need to do that babe.” Hyunwoo said as he already saw some fans frowning at you and he thought that would make you sad.

“And why not? Let them see that I have the most perfect man.” you chuckled, took his hand and with a big smile, you two walked on the red carpet. Photographer loved you and you were just smiling so stunningly that he was looking at you the whole time.

After that, he took you to the side and suddenly kissed you deeply. “What was that about?” you smirked. “I have the sexiest person ever as my love. You don’t know how hot you are. You are so powerful. I think I got into your trap and I never want to get out.” he said and walked with you to one of the rooms in the back ;)

Wonho:

You in his clothes. Let’s be honest here, Hoseok’s clothes would be the most comfortable thing you would wear. And you stole some pieces without him knowing. When you invited him over for movie nights he doesn’t know that you would come out of the bathroom in his hoodie and just panties. He would be shocked, will try to hide it but he will fail.

You just came out of the bathroom. Fresh, clean, with no makeup on but in your boyfriend’s clothes. To be honest? You did this on purpose because you know Hoseok and you knew this would be his breaking point.

You heard a little gasp but you didn’t look up at him since you knew he would be embarrassed by you would catch him. You went to grab snacks and you purposely bent down so he could see that you are only wearing panties underneath. You could hear another quiet gasp but you just smiled in your head, turned and walked to him to the couch.

You were looking throught movies you could watch and then finally when you chose the one you came to sit on Hoseok’s lab and brought a blanket over you both. You could feel that he was frozen on the spot. When you moved a little on his lap something started brushing over your bottoms... something hard.

“Something’s a wrong, baby?” you asked innocently but you started stroking him throught the pants. His eyes widened.

“I think we should screw the movie. Am I right?” you asked and he just nodded his head still amazed by your boldness.

Minhyuk:

Licking your lips. Minhyuk is a very affectionate boyfriend and since you first kissed he was obsessed with your lips. Even when you are talking he will get lost and just stare at your lips. You will break him by licking your lips. When he’ll see how plump and moisturized your lips will become, he won’t be able to hold himself.

You were in the studio with your boyfriend. It was a recording day and since Minhyuk knew it will be a long session he wanted you to be there with him so you two could accompany each other. Minhyuk was currently behind the glass and trying his best. His vocals were so angelic that it was slowly making you feel sleepy. Soon you fell asleep on the couch while Minhyuk was singing a sweet melody.

When you woke up you noticed that you are laying on someone’s lap. You quickly looked up and saw your boyfriend smiling at you.

“Good morning sleepy head.” he said in a cute voice.

“Good morning, love.” you said and rubbed your eyes.

You felt your lips were dry so you instinctively licked them trying to moisturize them. It was just an automatic innocent act for you but not for your boyfriend.

You felt how his thighs underneath you flexed and he moved a little. You looked up and him. He was biting his bottom lip looking at you intensively. “Are you okay, Minhyuk? You are so stiff.” you said and tilted your head a little.

“Your lips are causing me a problem.” he whispered and put your hand on his private area. “And those lips should handle the problem as well.”

Kihyun:

Neck kisses. You kissing his neck or him kissing your neck. It doesn’t matter but it will get him going. If you don’t wanna really long foreplay just kiss his neck couple of times and he’ll be all ready for you and for wrecking your body and soul in on night. Well, good luck ;)

Kihyun should today come back from his tour finally and you couldn’t be more excited. You missed him so much. Months without him was torture. Of course, you were calling but it wasn’t the same as when he is next to you.

You’ve heard the sound of keys and you jumped out of your seat and ran to the door. The first thing you saw was his pretty, new dyed honey brown hair and the second thing you saw was his stunning smile when he spotted you.

You ran right to his arms and he spun you around. “Welcome home, baby.” you whispered to his neck.

“Hey, princess. I’m so happy that I’m home.” he said and kissed the top of your head. “I’m so tired.” he whined, “let’s go sleep. “ he whispered.

You were sad. You knew he was tired but were hoping that he will spend some time with you after he’ll arrive. So you did the only thing you knew that will work and wake him up real quick. You started gently kissing his smooth neck slowly adding more pressure with every kiss.

“You little fox.” he chuckled. His voice sounded more clear than a minute ago.

He took your chin and made you face him. He had the biggest smirk and his eyes were dark as onyx. “You should say you miss me THAT much.”

Hyungwon:

Praise. Hyungwon knows that he is handsome but like every other human being he has his worries and his insecurities about himself. When you started praising him for his body and how sexy he looks he wouldn’t believe you at first. He thought that you are making fun of him. But once he’ll learn that you are genuine and his body really gets you going he couldn’t hold himself.

“Wow, darling! That shirt looks so good on you. Gosh, your proportions are just perfect. I have the most perfect boyfriend.” you said as you saw your boyfriend dressing up. You were laying on the bed on your tummy. Your head was in your hands and you were looking at him with a smile as if he was the most stunning being you’ve ever seen.

“Don’t make fun of me, Y/N. It’s not nice.” he huffed. Your feeling was hurt. How could he think you were making fun of him?

“How could you say that? I would never lie to you, prince.” you stood up, You came to him and hugged him with a pout on your lips. “It’s just don’t sound believable when there are men out there like Shownu or Wonho.” he mumbled sadly.

“Yah! Stop it!” you lightly tapped his bum which made you both giggle. “You are the most handsome” you started saying and placing kisses on his neck, “the sexiest,” you continued down on his neck, “ most attractive men I’ve ever seen in my life.” you finished and kissed his collarbones.

You looked to his eyes, “Your body is the most attractive body for me. I would worship you all night and day if you let me.” you said and he suddenly kissed you deeply. His kiss was fast, passionate, needy and his hands gropped your hips tightly. You let slip a moan.

“Then I’ll let you worship me princess.” he said and you happily responded with a kiss.

Jooheon:

Lingerie. Not only that you looked absolutely stunning in lace, velvet, silk. You also took the time and effort to look good... for HIM! The thought about that you did all of that just for his pleasure drove him crazy.

It was your first vacation together. You were finally alone, just with each other. You two couldn’t keep the hands for yourself the whole day. You were always hugging, holding hands, kissing or feeding each other food.

You got a perfect idea for the evening. You and Jooheon lately didn’t have time to pleasure each other and spend a hot night together in bed because of his work. You always took care of him and you weren’t mad but at this vacation,, you decided that you will catch up everything you weren’t able to do.

You got into your burgundy lace underwear set and walked out. “Babe, what are we going to, “ he stopped as he saw you leaning on the wall, “...do?” he finished the sentence with widened eyes.

“Do you think it’s pretty, honey? I wasn’t sur-” you couldn't even finish when he lifted you up and threw you on the bed. He quickly got on top of your and you could already see the bulge in his boxers forming as he was biting his lips looking at your whole form.

“So pretty.” he growled. “Is this all for me, baby?” he asked and finally looked at you.

“All yours, honey.” you raised your eyebrow and bit your bottom lip.

“Then be ready for a long night in paradise, babe.” he said in a low tone and attacked your neck.

Changkyun:

Your smell. Since the time you met, you didn’t capture his heart just with your pretty face and amazing personality. You caught his attention with your smell as well. You always smelled so sweet, so natural and fresh. So when you come from the shower he would always hug you from the back and inhales your sweet scent.

You went to the practice room. You wanted surprise Changkyun with homemade lunch and your presence. And also you had a new perfume and you wanted to see how he would react.

“Hey, guys! Surprise!” you yelled happily with bags of food in your hands. Everyone helped you, hugged you and thanked you. These boys were always hungry so in their eyes, you were an angel.

“Thank you for lunch, cutie. You really didn’t need to.” Changkyun said.

“I didn’t need to but I wanted to see you.” you smiled.

“Here I’m. I’m all yours.” he smiled and hugged you tightly. As always he buried his face to your neck and inhales your smell.

“New perfume?” he whispered and kissed gently your neck.

“Yes. You like it?” you asked innocently.

“It gets perfect with your natural scent. Well... they will survive a couple of minutes without us, right?” he winked at you, took your hand and slowly walked out of the practice room.

#Monsta X #monsta x reactions #monsta x requests #monsta x imagines #monsta x scenarios #monsta x smut #monsta x shownu #monsta x wonho #monsta x minhyuk #monsta x kihyun #monsta x hyungwon #monsta x jooheon #monsta x changkyun #monsta x writing

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