#but making this really helped me cope

[alpineshepherdbadboy]

bcs x seinfeld

#merry christmas :) #fun fact: i haven't watched this scene since it air and i had to mute it while getting the screengrabs bc it was just too painful #but making this really helped me cope #i think whenever i watch this scene i can just imagine nacho as frank costanza to make it a little easier #nacho varga #gus fring #hector salamanca #leonel salamanca #marco salamanca #tyrus kitt #victor brba #better call saul #bcs edit #source: seinfeld

[autisticaradiamegido]

thoughts on dave and aradia (<>)?

day 356

BIG fan tbh. in this house we love and respect timerails

truly yall read this log and tell me theyre not cute

#day 356 #year 4 #dave strider #aradia megido #aradave #homestuck #she really saw this kid and was like OH YOU HAVE ISSUES WITH YOUR MORTALITY?? :D #boy do i have some relevant life experience and wisdom to impart on THAT ISSUE SPECIFICALLY #and then she just. very gently and kindly makes the subject more approachable for ghostdave #the pesterlog i linked is literally my FAVORITE aradia moment. to me it is THE character defining moment for god tier aradia #yes she is being kind of ominous and trickstery at first #but it VERY quickly becomes clear shes got genuine concern for this kid she's had very little to do with up until this point #she really wants to connect with him over their shared time aspect stuff #and she really DOES care about how he feels about everything. she wants to help and she wants to put him at ease #because she KNOWS from experience that being dead and having to cope with what that means for you is like VERY UPSETTING AND TRAUMATIC #shes not just like. 'hee hee i think death is great and awesome because im edgy' #shes like 'no dude being dead is scary if you dont have anybody to explain this shit to you. so im going to explain it-' #'-and hopefully by the end of this conversation you will have some new things to feel relief and maybe even joy and excitement about' #'not just in spite of the death thing but BECAUSE of it' #i know shes spooky and has weirdgirl swag and we all love that about her but like #at her core she is a very KIND person. she may occasionally struggle to connect to people through the Death Special Interest Haze #but she WANTS to and when she DOES she is like. a genuinely very warm and comforting presence for her friends #ANYWAY. if andrew hussie or i guess james roach now want to give me an honorary doctorate for my 12+ years of intensive aradia studies #i will be here waiting patiently

[bootyful-seventeen]

Oh gosh okay so I went back to marinating more on long haired Jihoon, but specifically long haired Jihoon getting pegged has me chewing on the bars of my enclosure to get out

Like just think of how pretty he'd look when he's on all fours and your fucking into him!! His chest blushed and heaving from how needy he is for you and the way your touch just feels so good and electric running along your skin! Your fingers then threading through his hair to pull his head up to see his thoroughly fucked out and flushed face in the mirror you placed in front of the bed. His eyes rolling back into his skull as cute little whimpers and cries slip from his lips when you brush your lips along his shoulder and licking up his neck before nibbling on his earlobe. Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh and even the louder moans he'd make if you gripped his cheeks in your hands and pounded him into the mattress, his back arching so nicely that you can't help but run a hand up his spine and wrap his long hair around your fist while he trembled underneath you whimpering about how he's gonna cum. Your eyes dropping down to watch his slick hole swallowing your strap on with ease from being played with for so long before getting bent over. Jihoon's whines getting louder from hand slipping between his thighs to jerk off his leaky cock until he's releasing spurts onto the sheets under him. Tears springing from his eyes as you fuck him at a harder and faster pace until he was left gasping for air, his thighs shaking from keeping his ass up when your strap slips out of his trembling hole and a relieved smile on his face as you cooed about how good he was for you, and how he looks so pretty all fucked out like this between kisses along his spine

#seventeen smut #woozi smut #jihoon smut #i'm sorry i'm back in my geto jihoon thoughts of him with some long hair. like long ass hair like him and this started cuz #i saw a post on ig from the alley saying that they'll have more jjk merch coming soon and i really wanna get the keychains #especially since my slutty little toji is included too like oh my god #but yeah i think i might be good enough to try writing again but bit by bit #mostly cuz the ways i've been coping with stress and anxiety hasn't been as effective but writing this has helped me calm down a bit #and get me focused on something else cuz i've had too many peer reviews that i think i should probably get assessed by a doctor soon #but yee ya girl sammy is making baby steps of a return rn since writing this didn't feel draining at all and it made me so happy!!! #this shit has me feeling like austin powers when he got his mojo back lmaooooo #m:jihoon

[mosstrades]

Oh wait this is fucked up actually. Marcy grew up around Simon while he was actually already under the effects of the crown (both physically and mentally). He was already unraveling by the time they found each other, even if he still felt like he was 'himself', so Simon as we know him, regular-ass Simon, would be in ways a kind of stranger to her. Physically, in his appearance and presence decoupled from the effects of the crown; situationally, what with them not being in a barren wasteland and whatnot; emotionally and personally, with Simon maybe doing things or showing himself to be things that Marcy didn't know to expect. And add to that how much they've both changed over the course of their lives since they separated...

While Simon managed to see her life through Ice King's eyes for a while, I like to imagine the memory is fuzzy at best and entirely unreliable at worst, so — in a way, truly, their reunion is them getting to know each other all over again, in a new dynamic, but with the base of that same old, foundational relationship; that same old, old love.

And I'm so normal about it.

#(the reconnection of a grown up kid and her dad who she only knew as an active user after he gets out of rehab) who said that #<- projecting hard #adventure time #nick.txt #marceline abadeer #simon petrikov #fionna and cake #Do you think Simon has a strained relationship with self-expression and silliness after being IK. Do you think it makes Marcy think about #the Simon who raised her - always cracking jokes to help them both cope? #You ever think Marcy gets a bit weirded out by how... normal... post-canon Simon is. #Do you ever think Simon gets bouts of 'madness'* and she's like 'oh hey I know this guy'. #Do you ever think she tells childhood anecdotes from that time he wasn't there and he gets this heavy look of regret he cant quite hide-- #(at this point i have been shot with a tranquilizer dart) #*I think the relationship AT has with the complicated-ass concept of altered consciousness/'madness'/mental illness is really interesting #and has a lot of potential for expansion in fic #What with themes alienation from yourself and from others. What with the portrayal of what your being 'mad' 'does' to you/those around you. #What with themes of guilt and forgiveness and acceptance and responsibility and healing. #Like. If youre like me and you hc Simon as having a litany of mental struggles. At what point does that differ from #the magic-induced altered state? #and what does that look like and feel like? How does that affect himself and his connection to others? #I think its a very easily dismissed concept bc of how it brushes some pretty stank ableist tropes #but I also think it could be incredibly #resonant if treated skillfully and compassionately and realistically #to put it crassly #local man finally free of crazy-crown-curse discovers he has severe mental illness. like. the normal person kind. #has to deal with that. #tldr simon my friend simon my favorite he/she grandma who experiences psychosis <3 #and marcy my friend marcy my favorite she/they mitski stan who just wants love to surround her #the tags in this post are like three other posts. im right tho

[ransomdemands]

yknow sometimes the way trans women talk about testosterone and being on estrogen is indistinguishable from the way terfs try to convince afab people not to start hrt

this is not a criticism mind you, their experiences are their own and completely legitimate, it's just a matter of competing needs - they need a safe space to talk about their dysphoria and how testosterone makes them feel and i need to not hear about how i am destroying my body with hrt

ordinarily these things are pretty insular to transfem circles but since instagram has been feeding me transfem content i'm seeing it more and more and yet again the algorithm is fucking me

#ransomrambles #like a friend of mine in absolute genuineness told me how my skin was gonna stop being soft and my hair was gonna thin out #and she obviously wasn't trying to dissuade me from hrt .... but like ..... thanks for leading with that mate #with estrogen it's the - no downsides- people often say there aren't many downsides to taking e - save some erectile dysfunction #but when it's the other way it's - make sure you're really sure cause you're permanently ruining your body forever #like i get that - my skin feels so soft now - is an estrogen experience ..... but the reverse framing is not helping anyone here #that's just all you hear about testosterone hrt - a list of downsides you'll have to cope with #idk this isn't a fully constructed thought #like i said trans girls deserve the space to have that conversation #i just need to not be in that space cause it obviously hits me differently #but man the sheer volume of trans girls talking about the /damage/ t has done to them .... in dis tinguishable #the aside to this is also a lot of girls being like i realized i was a girl cause of xyzq #and the list is the same as the one my mother used to be like - see you must be a girl #so it's just tough #competing access needs are hard to manage #and that's why life is best on the curate your own experience webbed site

[spoonyruncible]

I’ve had a lot of infuriating shit happen to me over the course of my silly little life, but I do think I’ve pinned down the single most impossibly frustrating thing in the whole world.

“Wow, you have amazing coping mechanisms. This is remarkable, you've compensated for your disability so well that you're not even disabled really. I don't think you need medicine or help for it at all since you do so well!”

I’m not saying that abusing neurodivergent children works, but it does insomuch as the ones that survive the process turn out capable of functioning at levels no one should ever expect of anything ever. I can absolutely operate at 200% efficiency, sometimes for weeks, but it is illogical and cruel to expect that from me as the baseline. 

#o thx they're so good on account of i'm alive #if i didn't have them i would be dead already #also it turns out my OCD is not subclinical #it is just pure o #which uh does not really show so it's rarely diagnosed #and like not to make my notes a primer on how ocd works but ocd works bad #compulsions look kinda weird and scary but they help #like compulsions are actually coping mechanisms #and my one actual compulsive behavior is so nice #see i got hit by a car once at a crosswalk #not super bad or nothing #i bruised up my hip and elbow real bad but i was fine #the car did not even stop to check on me #so now i have to hit the crosswalk button three times #or tap three times before crossing the street #i can do it six if i have to #nine is the best #seven is only if i'm praying for something #but the point is when i do that weird thing i do? #i'm no longer full of obsessive thoughts about cars hitting me #i'm safe because i did the ritual #it is compulsive behavior #it isn't bad or disruptive #i'm also terrified of movie theatres now #because my mom died when my phone was off for a prescreened movie #so i just don't go in theatres #if i do then my sibling will get cancer #which thank you so much covid 19 #now i don't even have to think about this one #but the other ones?

[dowagersqueen]

book fans love to talk about how sweet was rhaenyra that when she heard laena was pregnant she flew to her to attend the birth of her twins and that they should have shown their bond in the show. i do wonder what these people think of rhaenyra not speaking to alicent for 3 whole years over viserys choosing her as wife after she was groomed into it by two men and had to handle her first pregnancy and birth alone, with no friends, with no people who genuinely cared about her well being, just her 16 year old self giving birth all alone in those castle walls where rhaenyra knew she was imprisoned because she made a comment to alicent about how miserable that life is. 

#alicent hightower #it's things like these that make it really hard for me to see their friendship or relationship develop well #she didn't speak to her supposed best friend for 3 whole years #she never condemned her father #she never tried to help alicent cope with her situation which rhaenyra knew was miserable because rhaenyra herself said she doesn't want #that life

[dotterelly]

[This is entirely stream of consciousness and I know only a small corner of the lore so forgive my ignorance]

There are 9 keys, but only 4 were present for the meeting. At least one cucurucho was murdered just before they got sent to prison. I'm curious how close they'll weave the creators personal lore to the over arching qsmp lore? Will some of the personal lore villains turn out to be in that group of 9 that have keys? Richarlyson told Philza the mission to purgatory to rescue Celbit and Baghera would be in a week or two, and I wondered a little why Richars picked Phil specifically for that, and seemingly only Phil of all the adults? When he does have other people about who he could asked. Like Etoiles would have been so down, he lives for that kind of adventure and he'd do anything for Pomme. So I was thinking maybe there's a plan for Philza (as leader of Bolas) to encounter purgatory lore and maybe come face to face with the watcher? Or maybe I'm overthinking it, maybe it's just that he's the only one Celbit and Baghera would trust and follow in their probably fragile state of mind? But heck knows how they'll prepare for that mission now. It's unclear how much of their stuff will survive the upheaval. I really hope Missa is there when Phil leaves for that because he's definitely not telling Chayanne and Tallulah where he's going and why because they'd never let him go alone. A lot is uncertain about the effects of the reset, but Rose's sanctuary is for sure saved. Like it makes absolutely no sense to the lore if a sanctuary protected by a demi Goddess would get destroyed by something that isn't world ending. On the other hand this is definitely going to significantly sap her strength and I wouldn't be surprised if the sanctuary were to be compromised in the not too distant future.

OK I'm going to shut up now.

#qsmp #sorry i only recently got into this as a hyperfixation while going through a month long anxiety attack #on the plus side I'm basically caught up on all of Philza's vods #even if it was at the expense of my sleep #but to be fair i wasn't really sleeping anyways because anxiety so #wooooo unhealthy coping mechanisms #but i haven't had anyone really to talk to about this crap #none of my friends are in it and though they listen to me ramble i know none of it makes sense with the lack of context #please help me I'm dying for people to screech with #Tumblr don't let me down!

[malikselfindulgence]

Sorry for the uptick in system stuff Im lowkey struggling and need to see system positivity posts or I'll explode

#malik's rambles #okay i know my ass is gonna vent in tags rn so . tw for that !! #iwill never shut up i missed tumblr tags so much wow #itsnot their fault and like . like i dont want to blame them . but its so isolating being and living this way #ill always be grateful for them and I know its just my brain trying to cope and like !! its not their fault but this sucks so bad like wow #also doesnt help that besides how scared I am and how I just . wanna be normal . I feel like I sound insane to other people #it constantly feels like everyone is laughing at us and is just playing along with our “roleplay thing” because they dont wanna bother #and like !! im trying really really hard to be positive about it and just live as well as I can . all of us are !! but it makes me feel like #ridiculous . it feels like everyone'll laugh and think we're playing pretend. which shouldnt matter people will always be assholes !! #I dunno aough im rantingso hard rn . and masa2 wont share which is fine but imscared and worried and scared and aauahhggggggggg #ik the point of the disorder is to hide memories from me so i can function but like . man this suckss9 bad #okay enough of this . Imgonna watch monsters inc i love monsters inc

[mars-ipan]

i do miss being a little kid and creating the most vividly fucked up stories with my toys that i could

#i would say it was one of my fav little girl things but i did it with my brother mostly #and he sometimes got more into it than me #it’s great we had stories of abuse kidnapping murder #i thought up a looooot of kidnapping stories. i think it was how i coped with the intrusive thoughts of break-ins i’d get lmao #but this isn’t abt my GAD this is about my creative bloodlust #what even was a sleepover if you and ur best friend weren’t roleplaying an evil torture dungeon with her lps toys #or pretending to be foxes in the wild and getting mauled by bears #<- i was not a warrior cats kid but was friends with them. we all liked foxes so we were usually foxes #honestly i think a lot of my artistic energy is spent trying to return to that level of raw creative energy and power #it was always either violent or everyone was having sex with each other #to the kid with internalized homophobia who would jokingly torment me with ‘lesbian’ barbies in daycare (which we later got in trouble for): #thanks for helping me make the connection that lesbians were just girls who liked girls (like my aunts #also really funny that we’re both gay now #hey friends and mutuals who wants to play barbies with me and have them cannibalize each other #girlish whimsy. for free. cmon it’ll be so much fun

[bastetwastaken]

Okay, I NEED to share this with you all. It's taken me like, 5 hours to work out how to speak normally about this and not just scream incoherently into the void.

@artofnovagenesis made a wonderful cover art for Double Exposure and it's just so perfect and wonderful and lovely, I am beyond happy to have friends who do such amazing things.

My love, you did so wonderfully with this, you captured Atems smugness and Yugis softness and their shadows smooching is just the cutest fucking thing in the world okay. It's adorable. It's everything. Everyone please thank Nova for blessing us with this.

Oh, and I guess if you lovely people want to read the fic, just click here. but ART.

#puzzleshipping #i can't cope with how lovely people are pls send help #atem #fanfic #fanfiction #yugi mutou #I'm just someone who writes stupid things but you all make me feel so loved and so special #and I don't quite know how to cope with that because I'm not very good with accepting people being nice because I have issues #But I'm really trying and thank you to everyone who is nice to me #I would like to offer hugs to everyone who wants them

[naamahdarling]

.

#oh god it's bad brain times right now #im crawling out of my skin with how terrible everything is #I'm ao restless and pent up and angry and lonely and confused and just ...all bad things #this feels So Bad guys #i want to just scream to let it out but my throat hurts #oh this sucks so bad #im just. not coping. #I'm trying so hard i really am #but most of the things that help me or make my life better are unavailable right now and i can't find help to fix the things that are bad #ill be fine in a few hours but this is so unpleasant

[grey-has-rusted]

what they don't tell you about life is that it's hard. woe is me

#ramblings #yes. i logged onto tumblr just to complain. #i have not been having a good time irl </3 #guys am i cooked? i wake up everyday with a heavy sorrow in my heart. #i am sad all the time even though i enjoy the wonders of life. #i laugh and smile and talk and learn. but im still sad. #it also doesn't help that i have psychotic tendencies and episodes #'go for a walk. that's a healthy coping mechanism' bro i can't even go outside bc i will get lost and walk for hours and almost- #unintentionally kill myself #it sucks. it all sucks and i say things that don't make sense either. apparently. allegedly. #i just want a functional brain. i would be so unstoppable if it weren't from my brain maybe i could actually function like a normal person #and hold down a job and be consistent with my hobbies and passions and actually maintain friendships #ong ive been so lonely too #i haven't bothered making friends anymore bc i know i won't be consistent and i dont wanna waste anyone's time #that's just really unfair #and i rely so heavily on videogames and fiction to get me through the day #bc it makes me feel less lonely. yeah i know i sound lame 💀 #anyways- see y'all in another year when i remember tumblr exists

[parvuls]

now I need an au where bitty starts dating jack before meeting the smh gang and unlike every other fic it DOESN'T go well. maybe bitty met jack in the library, or an event, so his first impression of him wasn't of a jock, and then meeting a room full of big energetic hockey jocks is really not the most comfortable of situations to an alternate universe bitty who hadn't been on smh for four years.

so on the ride home jack keeps giving him these anxious glances while bitty just stares in horror at his violated empty pie pan. jack doesn't know what to say, and eventually he just mumbles "I... they'll behave next time, I promise," and bitty sort of swallows and says, "it's okay, honey. I guess it just takes time to click with people after they do unspeakable things to your pies."

#omgcp #omgcheckplease #that line KILLS me #zimbits #anyway give me an au where it isn't the found family trope but rather that bitty's trauma makes him really uncomfortable in jack's world #and jack's social anxiety makes him really uncomfortable in bitty's world #and they have to either help each other learn how to cope or walk away #me @ outside conflict be like: 😍 #text #jack x bitty

[dazais-guardian-angel]

kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....

#bungou stray dogs #been thinking a lot about chuuya lately (shocking for me i know (said with no sarcasm truly lmao it is rare for me)) #cause of the 15 manga and also playing the fucking jeht quest in genshin impact ugh (where's the one dual genshin bsd fan who Understands) #but like this pressure has been building up for chuuya for so long due to being used and manipulated by all these people #first the sheep then mori then verlaine then still mori now #he was groomed since childhood just like dazai #but unlike dazai he didn't have an oda to help him get out of the mafia........ he's still stuck there #and his personality is different from dazai's. dazai was more self-aware imo (but still a groomed emotionally abused kid don't get me wrong #but chuuya's whole thing is needing to belong and wanting a leader to be loyal to but ending up in positions of leadership himself #which makes him feel pressured but he accepts and stifles any negative feelings just because he wants to belong #and all this crushed him with the events in the light novels and yeah he went through character growth but he's...... Still In The Mafia... #and that fucking scene asagiri added to the cannibalism stage play i don't think hardly anyone even knows about bc IT'S NOT DISCUSSED ANYMO #where mori emotionally manipulates him with the flags!!! and it deeply hurts him!!! and he presumably deals with that shit all the time!!! #it is WORRISOME. it WORRIES ME okay. #chuuya doesn't have anyone who can save him from the mafia (dazai is in no position to okay; it's all he can do just to try to save himself #and it's so so scary. it spells awful things for him. #didn't asagiri say he'd have a rough path or something??? and he added that fucking scene in the play!!! it haunts me!! #i fully expected this shit to hit a turning point in the meursault arc but we can't have nice things i guess #and as for kunikida a;lskdfl (took me this long to get to him oop) literally the ending of Entrance Exam (the novel) is just #One Big Foreshadowing for Kunikida's downfall #he's compared to the azure king for a reason. Sasaki saw the azure king in him for a reason. it's fucking worrying!!!!! #there hasn't really been anything like that since in the manga (just like for chuuya lol ugh) but he's TERRIBLE at coping with his trauma #and it only gets more apparent once shit hit the fan in the doa/hunting dogs/meursault arc #it's not good!!! i'm worried for kunikida too!!!! #even if the manga isn't focusing on this these worries are always in the back of my mind man #both kunikida and chuuya are doomed to hit some kind of breaking point eventually and i await those moments with dread yet anticipation #i want dazai to be able to save kunikida from the despair being too good a person brings the way he couldn't save oda #and chuuya.... if we get a scene with him & mori mirroring the one in dark era where dazai finds out that mori orchestrated the kids' death #oh man i think i'll fucking die (give it to me i need to cry)

[newfeeling77]

i love my friends so much my connection with other ppl makes my life worth living. i love finding common ground and understanding with regular people and understanding im part of something bigger than ill ever truly comprehend, because human relationships (to me) are another plane of understanding and love, from short once in a lifetime interactions to lifelong friendships, because its about memories and how much of a wonderful scrapbook you can make of your experiences… im grateful for every second no matter how painful or scary because i know its my only shot at living which means so much to me because i wasnt always sure id make it… i was going to just put this in my notes app out of embarrassment for sincerity but everyone i interact with gives me this feeling and that includes you people on here. its really incredible

#not sure if this makes sense bc im super drunk but im just saying. #i love my close friends old friends new friends everybody i know because it feels so good to know people. #ive been so depressed lately but i never cross over because i truly love life. experiencing new or old art all the time. #meeting new people and feeling love for humanity #learning and feeling better about myself #loving the people around me #it really is worth it despite my pain. #and i hope i never have to go to the psych ward again #and i can learn to cope… depression is a disease i suffer from but not a death sentence #and i need to believe in myself and my abilities #ill be alright… if only i felt like this when i was sober :( lets go substance abuse #anyway i wish my therapist was more helpful n not telling me its okay to pursue relationships with 40yo men