#even lars who was probably dragged out there by sadie

[picturejasper20]

I was thinking about Sadie’s arc and how she changes in the series:

In season 1 and season 2, Sadie admited a few times to Steven that she had a delicate relationship with her mother. When she talked about Barbara, she refered to her as someone who was annoying and a bit overbearing.

In episode ¨Sadie’s song¨ Steven gets to know more about Sadie’s private life. After he insited her on singing at Beach-a-Palooza, he met Barbara and the two decided to help Sadie with her ¨makeover¨.

There multiple lines moments that show that Sadie didn’t want her mother to get involved in her plans.

-When Steven tries telling Barbara about the even, Sadie covers his mouth before he finishes the sentence. She wants to keep this a secret and doesn’t want Barbara to know.

Steven: ¨We're planning a stage show for-  (Sadie tries to cover Steven's mouth.) Beach-a-Palooza.¨

Barbara:¨... What was that?¨  

Sadie: ¨I'm... going to sing a song at Beach-a-Palooza.¨

-Another example is when Barbara is searching for outfits in the closet for Sadie to wear.

Barbara:¨Oh! Look, its your old ballet outfit!¨

Steven:¨You're a ballerina?¨

Sadie:¨When I was like, 10.¨

Barbara: ¨Oh! It's your swimsuit! She used to be a competitive swimmer.¨

Sadie: ¨For like a month, when I was 11¨

This hints that whenever Sadie wanted to start a new hobbie her mother would get carried away and push her daughter to the point Sadie would get uncomfortable and stopped doing the things she enjoyed just to avoid Barbara ¨helping her¨.

Because there’s a difference between getting support and getting too much support. In the first case you want the person to succeed, you help them by giving them a piece of advice and by giving them ideas.

In the second case getting too much support can make the person feel uncomfortable. If they are shy, it can become very overwhelming for them. They would feel that you are pushing them too much and make them even stopped what they wanted to do just so you leave them alone.

And Sadie is one of those types of people: She is sometimes is very shy and lets others take advantage of her. In ¨Joking Victim¨ Lars would pretend to be ill to skip his job at the Big Donut and hangout with the Cool Kids.

That’s why it was so hard for her to tell Barbara how she wanted to try new things without her helping her for once. She wanted to do this by herself.

"Yeah, I did! I did! I did, I did! Just like I say lots of things! Like, "Hey Mom, swimming looks fun," then bam, suddenly I'm anchoring a 400-meter relay for the Beach City Seals! "Hey Mom, I thought signing up for softball would be nice!" Six birthdays later, I'm still getting nothing but knee pads and batting helmets! "Hey Mom, I want to sing in this year's Beach-a-Palooza," and what do I get!? THIS! I just thought, for once, I'd get to do things my way, but you came in and took over everything like you always do!"

Once Sadie explained this to Barbara, she understood how she was making her daughter feel uncomfortable. Over time she started giving more space to Sadie and respecting her privacy.

In season 4 in the episode ¨The Good Lars¨ Sadie started hanging out with the Cool Kids. When Steven arrived, he noticed how Buck was playing the guitar while Sadie was singing. 

This was something rare for Sadie to do. Most of the time she would be with Lars but she didn't seem to have friends besides him. It's likely that their relationship was codependent as they had trouble growing as people before they were separated.

She becoming friends with the Cool Kids is further explored in the episode "Sadie Killer": She was really tired of her job in Big Donut and she knew it was making her feel miserable. She doesn't want to quit it because she had trouble moving on from Lars and she wasn’t sure of what she wanted to do with her life.

"Well, I worry about Lars being in space, and I hope he's safe and all, but... Ughh... Working all these shifts by myself has been a huge drag. I'm totally used to doing his work, but I'm used to at least having him here to talk to."

By the end of the episode she quits her job and joins the band.

But why she was so reluctant of singing in "Sadie's song" and now she wants to start her own band?

Because "Sadie's song", Sadie actually wanted to sing at the beginning before Barbara took over. The reason she was so uncomfortable was due to her mother and Steven making do something in a way she didn't like.They made her dress like a pop-star and sing a popular song that probably wasn't was what she usually listened to.

In "Sadie Killer", she was the one who came up with the lyrics, she dressed in a way she liked and nobody was telling her what she should be and what she should sing. Her style was inspired by horror movies she watched and how complicated her life had been until that moment.

Now that Barbara didn`t get too involved in her hobbies anymore, Sadie felt free of trying out new things. She knew that she didn’t need to worry about her mom.

The series later addressed this aspect of their relationship in "The big show"

Sadie:"The band is my thing, and I just want to be able to do it on my own."

Barbara: "Right, right. You need your space. I understand. You kids be safe and have a good show, huh?"

Sadie spent most of the time thinking her mother iwas going to show up and take over the band. She even suspected that Barbara was hiding between the crowd while she was singing.

However, Barbara never showed up and proved that she was trying to change and give her daughter more space.

Another reason i think was holding Sadie back was her relationship with Lars. She used to be with him all the time. They would do many things together.

When Lars couldn't return to Earth, Sadie felt she lost something really important and didn't know how to move on from that.

Her starting a band symbolized her accepting her loss. She acknowledged she needed to make some changes in her routine if she didn't want to feel bad forever.

In conclusion: I think Sadie's character arc is about her not letting other take advantage of her shy personality and becoming more assertive. She starts to realize how she can depend too much on certain people (Lars) and let others push her in doing things in a way she doesn't agree with. (Barbara)

By the end of the series, she has a much healthier relationship with her friends and she feels she can be herself.

Gifs and images source: Steven Universe wikia. 

#steven universe #sadie miller #barbara miller #lars barriga #the cool kids #character arc #sadie #thoughts

[starscheme]

Only You

Chapter Six: Planning, Perplexed, and Provoked.

 The next morning, Steven woke up alone, leaving him to wonder where Spinel had run off to so early. He had convinced her not to worry about Connie and finally get some sleep, but he was still a bit concerned that she wasn't going to let it go. He knew it was difficult for her to trust people after she felt used by his mother. Hopefully, she trusted him enough to believe his words. Its not like anything he said was a lie. Of course he still loved Connie very much, but his romantic feelings for her had all but gone.

Spinel had mentioned that she wanted to prepare for their trip as well. Yet another reason for Steven to be concerned. She was rather unpredictable, so he had no idea what she was thinking had to be prepared on her part

This was Stevens first time as a boyfriend and he was determined to play his role perfectly from here on out. However, that did require a few embarrassing tasks he would have to complete before the small vacation he had planned. One of which, meant he would need some advice from his dad and he was not looking forward to that conversation. With all this in mind, Steven dragged himself out of bed to get himself ready for the day. Hopefully, he'd be able to get the more awkward tasks done as soon as possible.

As Steven compiled his list of errands in his head, Spinel was already working on a few of her own. Last night, she realized that she was Stevens first official girlfriend and if that was the case, she needed to do her best to be his last. The only problem was, she had no idea what her job was as a girlfriend. Peridot had told her that she had to be affectionate with Steven, but that's all she said. Spinel was sure that she'd need a human’s advice on this. After all, Gem relationships were a lot different from human ones and surely Steven was looking for a more human experience as boyfriend and girlfriend.

Her biggest problem now was finding a human to ask for advice. Ideally, she would have liked to ask a human female, but the only one she knew well enough for this was Connie and surely it would be insulting to her for Spinel to ask advice like this so soon. So after scanning her brain, Spinel found herself walking into Lars' bakery, hoping that he would have some insight on this for her.

"Good morning," Lars greeted as he stepped out from the back, but surprised when he saw that Spinel was here alone. It was always unusual to see her about town with Steven. "Spinel, what brings you here so early? I told you that if you wanted to eat the batter, I'd just send some over."

Spinel shook her head, "I uh...came here for some advice. Do you have a minute?"

"Advice," repeated Lars curiously. "Well, I'm not sure what I could possibly help you with, but I guess I'll try?"

Spinel smiled now, "great! I need to know how to be the perfect girlfriend! Like, should I wear something specific? Am I supposed to match his clothes? Do I have to do anything specific when we are in bed? How do I—"

Lars had darted from the counter and clamped his hand over Spinels mouth before she could finish. "Hold up," he insisted before cautiously removed his hand. "Why are you asking me how to be a good girlfriend? Shouldn't you be asking, you know, a girl?!"

Spinels pigtails drooped lightly, "...I don't really know any human girls I can ask and I'm not very close to any other humans except for you."

"But Steven has lots of other friends that I've seen you talk to."

"I was only friendly with them because of Steven. Because I had Steven...I didn't really even think about making any other human friends."

Lars sighed, "I'm really the only one you can ask?"

Spinel nodded her head, "please help me."

Lars was not very comfortable giving advice like this. Though, maybe he could help with some generic information about relationships. "Okay, okay," he agreed as he rubbed the back of his neck. "I can probably help with some little things, but I really think you'd be better off finding a girl to talk to."

With that, Lars sat down with Spinel at a table and allowed her to ask her questions. While they began their awkward talk, Steven was on his way to have his own embarrassing conversation.

He had made his way to his father’s Van, which was normally parked beside the Carwash. Even after all these years with his money, Greg really didn't seem like he wanted to do anything with it.

"Hey, Dad, you in there?" Steven asked as he knocked on the back doors of the old vehicle. One of doors opened with a long metallic groan and he was greeted by his Father who had clearly just been woken up.

"Morn'n Schtu-ball," Greg began cheerfully. "Shouldn't you be at little Homeschool?"

"...not this morning. I uh, actually came to talk about my 18th birthday. Cause I know you—"

"—oh well already have a few things planned, but did you want to ask for something specific?"

"Uh...sort of," Steven continued. "I know you guys wanted to celebrate with me and we still can, I was just kinda hoping that maybe...we could cancel the party and...instead...Spinel and I could take a little...trip?" This should have been the least awkward part of the conversation, but he knew how much his dad was looking forward to this birthday. "I mean, we can all have a party or something afterwards. I just...I mean it's a big birthday and I wanted to..."

"You want to spend it with your girlfriend," Greg finished for his son with a nod. Truthfully, he was a little disappointed. His son was turning 18 and now that he had a girlfriend, he was spending less time with his old dad. Still, this was how things usually went and this was new to Steven. He certainly remembered what it felt like to be in love.

Steven blushed lightly and glanced down at the ground. "We-well, yeah. Just a small trip for some...time alone. It's a little awkward with the gems always around and Pearl is still circling us like a shark."

"Yeah, I've been there." Greg laughed. "Don't worry, son, I get it. Where are you planning to go?"

"Uh, well...I wanted to go somewhere that Spinel would have fun. A place with a big amusement park or something. She likes Funland a lot after all. I thought she would enjoy going on bigger rollercoasters and seeing the shows. She mentioned wanting to go once when she saw a commercial about a year ago. Everything was just so busy; we all had to tell her no."

Greg watched his son as he thought aloud, talking about the plans for his birthday as if it was all for Spinel. It was quite nostalgic. When he was with Rose, all he ever thought about was making her happy. It seemed that Steven was no different. "That sounds like a great time," Greg agreed, "but Spinel can be...excitable. I hope she doesn't break something or...someone if she gets startled."

"I think I can keep her calm," Steven added, even if he was little concerned over that as well.

"Soooo...will you two...be...staying overnight?" Greg finally asked while clearing his throat. Pearl had spoken with him about Steven and Spinel being a little intimate and he had been looking for an opportunity to have 'the talk.' Perhaps this was a good chance to guide the conversation that way.

"Yeah, a couple nights actually," answered Steven. "I didn't want to rush our time at the park or...anything."

Greg nodded his head, trying to remember everything he had practiced saying for the last couple of days. "Well you know, son, when a man and a Gem are in love—-"

Steven blushed and put out his hands to stop his father. "D-dad, wait! You don't have to go through the whole thing..."

Greg was clearly nervous, but he did appear slightly disappointed. Wasn't this one of the things a father was supposed to do? "Oh...yeah, I guess you wouldn't need me to explain too much. I mean...you know, the internet and all."

"Well...no, I did want to talk with you about...some things," Steven began awkwardly. "Cause this will be our first...um..." his voice trailed off and he wasn't sure how to finish. Sex was a natural thing when you loved someone and he knew that, but it was still embarrassing to talk about with his dad.

Greg took a deep breath and puffed up his chest before placing his hand on his sons shoulder. "Don't worry, Son. Your dads got this."

While Steven was dealing with the can of worms he had opened, Spinel and Lars had been talking about her own concerns. Luckily for Lars, she wasn't asking anything too difficult.

"So, what I'm saying is," Lars continued as Spinel listened eagerly from the seat across him. "You don't have to do anything for him specifically. Just be yourself."

"But...than what's the difference between me as his friend and me as his girlfriend? I've been trying to come up with my own answer...but besides the things we do in private, not much has changed..." said Spinel quietly, still worried she was doing all this wrong.

"A-and..." Lars started with a light blush, "...that's fine. Nothing has to change that much. Just...do what you've always done. I'm sure Steven would tell you the same."

"Do you really think so? I mean, Steven was saying how he wanted to prepare things for a trip he wanted us to take. Doesn't that mean I should prepare some stuff too? And what should I prepare? As a girlfriend, how am I supposed to make things special for him like he does for me?"

"Well now...this is where you would be better off talking to another girl," answered Lars with a nervous laugh. "Why don't you ask Pearl or something? Isn't she like, basically your mom or something?"

Spinel sighed miserably as she shrunk in her seat, "Pearl has never been with a human. Gems treat relationships a little different than humans do. So asking another Gem seems pointless."

"Oh, yeah I guess I can see that..." he trailed off, unsure how to help with this part. If only he had a sister to pawn this off on. Sadie wasn't in town and she'd probably be way too shy to talk about this stuff with Spinel. "Well...you know, there is nothing wrong with figuring this stuff out as you go. Though...haven't you been around humans for what, thousands of years? You didn't have any other human partners? In all that time?"

Spinel shook her head. "I came here with my friend and that's all I needed. Besides, we spent most of our time fighting corrupted gems. I did meet lots of humans because of Rose, but I never...felt anything for them like this."

Lars smiled a bit. Spinel’s naivety and innocence on these subjects made her seem so adorable. Like a bunny worried about coming out of its hole. It was odd since Spinel was thousands of years older than him, but he couldn't help seeing her as younger than he was. "I don't think you need to worry so much. Just the fact that you want to be a good girlfriend, will make you a good girlfriend. At least, that's what I think. Besides, you know that you could probably talk with Steven about all this. If you want to do things that make him happy, just ask him what makes him happy. You don't have to do stuff in secret."

"...I really hope so," replied Spinel with a small smile. "Thanks for talking with me about all this."

Lars stood from his seat and sighed, feeling a little accomplished. Maybe he was getting wiser? "No problem. I'm not sure I was able to help much, but hopefully you won't be worrying too much now."

Spinel stood up as well and gave Lars a quick hug as she expressed her thanks. Lars pat her head lightly in response, but in that moment, it felt as if something had stabbed him in the chest and his legs gave way from the pain.

"Lars?!" Spinel exclaimed as she knelt down with him to see what was wrong. She couldn't see anything physical, but for a moment, the whites of Lars eyes appeared to turn completely black. Though it went away so quickly that she wasn't really sure it had happened.

 "What did you do to him?!" Sodalite shouted in concern as she rushed into the bakery and hurried to Lars' side. "G-get away from him!"

"Wha-I didn't do anything!" Spinel insisted. "He just suddenly—"

Sodalite looked terrified, but she wrapped her arms around Lars shoulders in an attempt to block him from Spinel. "J-just wait a moment! I-I saw my Diamond just d-down the street. She will heal you..."

"You mean Steven?" Spinel asked hopefully. Who else would Sodalite mean? This was good timing. Whatever was hurting Lars, Steven could fix it. "Here, help me get him into a chair," insisted Spinel as she reached for Lars.

"N-no! You can't touch him!" Sodalite shouted with a shaky voice.

Spinel was silent, staring at Sodalite with a blank stare until her eyes became dark for a split second. Sodalite gasped and her whole body began to tremble. "Y-you're...—"

Spinel smiled, her eyes turning dark once more. "It's just a game, if you play nice, Lars won't be hurt." As Spinel Spoke, Lars woke up, his eyes blackened out as well.

Sodalite seemed like she was going to reply, but out of the corner of her eye she could see Steven approaching the store and she panicked even further. She let out a small gasp and everything around them became completely dark due to her fear.

Steven had barely noticed Spinel inside the store before the black out and he found himself panicking as well. Sodalite always freaked out like this, but more so around Spinel. He quickly opened the door and walked into the darkened store. "Sodalite, you need to calm down!" He called out into the void, unable to see where the others were. Luckily, it didn't take much more than that for the darkness to recede back towards Sodalite.

Steven was relieved, but only for a second until he saw something that stopped him cold. He and Sodalite were both staring wide eyed as Lars had a shocked Spinel pinned up against the wall, forcing a kiss on the pigtailed Gem.

"LARS!" Steven shouted furiously, his entire body turning a pink hue as a fragmented shield formed around Spinels body, a rush of force pushing Lars away from her.

Sodalite was quick enough to catch the pink human as he was thrown backward. Lars was a little disoriented from the blow, placing his hand on his aching head. "Wha...what hit me?" He asked in a daze.

"What the hell were you doing?!" Demanded Steven as the ground began to crack beneath them.

"Pl-please, my Diamond!" Sodalite began with tears in her eyes, horribly terrified that she would be cracked or shattered any moment in Pinks angry outburst. Still, she had let go of Lars and bowed down in front of Steven with trembling hands as she saluted him. "He-he didn't know what he was doing! It-must have been—"

"Huh? Hold on," Lars started, his thoughts finally becoming less hazy. "What's going on?! Steven, what are you doing? You're gonna wreck the place if you don't calm down!"

"SHUT UP!" Steven shouted in reply. This wasn't like when Spinel had been reset. He didn't have a real reason to be angry with Lars back then, but now, he was overwhelmed by the desire to crush something.

A/N: Once again, I apologize if there are a lot of mistakes. Sick brain still reigns supreme. Also, I’m really sorry Lars, you’re just a pawn in this terrible game that’s been started. >.>

#steven universe #stevinel #stevinel fanfic #su fanfic #only you #chapter 6 #lars #Spinel #cg spinel #pink steven #angry steven #fanfic #i'm sorry #please don't hate me

[fallen-gravity]

Change

All of Steven’s talk in the new pair of episode about how he’s afraid of being left behind and all this change being too overwhelming for him put the idea in my head that he could probably benefit from talking to Spinel a lot after the mess that was Prickly Pair, and I couldn’t let go of it until I wrote a fic about it. 

Summary:  Steven needs to talk to somebody, and he's quickly realizing that he's running out of options. 

AO3:

Or under the cut:

You’ve reached Connie Maheswaran, leave a message!

Beep.

…

You’ve reached Connie-

Beep.

....

You’ve reached Connie Maheswaran, leave a message!

“Hey, Connie” Steven murmurs, leaning back against the hood of the Dondai. “I guess I probably should leave a message. I just wanted to talk. It’s nothing serious,” he lies through his teeth, “I just...wanted to talk to you. It’s been a while, and I, uh, just wanted to see how things were going. Call me when you can. Don’t mind all the missed calls. I’m fine.” He pauses for a moment, gazing up at the twinkling stars. “I love you.” 

Beep. 

Steven clicks his phone off, and places his phone face down on his chest. He rests his hands behind his head and contemplates what he could possibly do now. 

Connie was his only resort. Lars already left, he can’t talk to Sadie after that embarrassing fiasco at the graduation ceremony, his poor dad’s already been through enough with Bluebird, and the gems wouldn’t understand. If he went to them he’s sure they’d just pat him on the head and try to tell him how proud they are, or try to offer some sort of advice of how to fix it.  Yeah, well, this time he can’t fix it. Maybe he doesn’t even want to fix it.

Who else is there to go to? If he can’t worry his dad or Connie, and the gems won’t be any help, where else could he go for help? It’s not like he can go to the barn anymore, since it got merged with Little Homeworld.

Actual Homeworld? Now there’s a thought. The Diamonds would love to have him, sure, but what help would they be? If Blue finds out that he’s feeling sad then she’s just going to start crying, and then everyone else on Homeworld is going to start crying, Yellow’s probably just going to try to “solve” everything with violence, and White’s probably going to turn it into another excuse to bring up the offer to live on Homeworld again. It’s a miracle Spinel survived living in the palace with them for more than ten minutes.

Wait a minute.

“Spinel!”  Steven thinks out loud. “Spinel would understand!”

He slides off the car’s hood and climbs into the driver’s seat. He starts the car, ejects Shep’s cassette tape before it can start playing, and makes his way back to Beach City. It’s ironic, really. One moment he’s singing praises about the wonders of change to Spinel, and the next he’s going to her because he can’t cope with change himself. He might as well warp in raising a huge white flag over his head. 

The lights are on in the house when his car pulls up, but word must’ve gotten around that the graduation after party was cancelled without him needing to say it, because there’s no other cars on the beach or any music coming from the house. That’s good. The less people home, the easier it’ll be to sneak out.

“Hey buddy,” Amethyst waves hello from the couch as he comes in, seated in the middle beside Garnet and Pearl. “Nobody saw where you went after the ceremony, you okay? You...want anything to eat?” 

Steven shakes his head as he hangs his jacket up on a hook. “I filled up on cake, thanks”

Pearl’s the next to speak up. “Would you like some tea? I know how tiring planning these things can be”

“No thanks” Steven replies, and fakes a yawn, stretching his arms above his head. “I think I’m just going to try getting some sleep. I’ll see you guys in the morning”. Without waiting for them to reply, he begins heading up the stairs towards his room, until he’s stopped halfway by the sound of Garnet calling his name. He freezes up. Oh no, did I get caught? Is she going to make me stay? Is she going to make me talk to her instead?

He turns to her, expecting to see her with her visor removed and ready to give him a long, powerful speech about family always being there for you, or something. But she’s not. She’s just standing there, one hand on the railing of the stairs. She’s looking at him, but her visor renders her expression unreadable. 

“Have a good night, Steven” she says, and nods very subtly at him. The gesture makes him smile, and he disappears up the stairs. He opens the door to his balcony as quietly as he can, and sneaks into the dome without closing the door behind him to make as little noise as he possibly can. He tentatively steps onto the warp pad, takes a deep breath, and warps away to Homeworld. Now all he needs to do is try to find a way to get Spinel away from the diamonds long enough to talk to her alone without them noticing. 

Not that they’d even mind, anyway, but Steven always has to take things the hard way, doesn’t he. He materializes into the palace, and before he has even a fraction of a second to look around- 

“Well, well, well!” Spinel shouts from Pink’s old throne. “Look what the warp pad dragged in!” She stretches her legs into springs, and projects herself off of the headrest to land beside him. “Mister Savior of the Universe himself!” 

“Hi Spinel”

“What are ya doin’ here? This some top secret diamond meeting I don’t know about? I can go grab ‘em for ya”  She’s about to leave, but Steven grabs her by the wrist before she can so as much take a single step away. 

“N-no, Spinel, that won’t be necessary. I’m here to see you.”

She blinks, and turns to look around her to make sure there’s nobody else in the room. “Me?” 

Steven nods. “Yes, you.”

Her expression changes from a blank stare to a face-splitting grin between one blink and another. “Well, why didn’t ya say so!” She snaps her fingers, and winds an arm around him and uses her other to spring them onto White’s throne. “What brings you out to see lil’ ol me? Didja miss me or something?” 

Steven frowns. “I’m not here to play games, Spinel”

“Oh.”  Her arm holding Steven in place deflates, and she sits down, dangling her legs over the edge. “Then what do you need me for?” She raises an eyebrow at him. “It doesn’t have anything to do with another injector, does it? Because it’s not mine this time”

Steven sighs, and sits down on White’s throne as well. “I just...wanted to talk” 

“Oh, well, then I’m all ears!” She stretches her hand into a megaphone and places it against the side of her head where her ear would be. “What’s on yer mind?” 

Steven twiddles with his thumbs and kicks his feet back and forth. “Everything”. 

“You’re gonna have to be more specific than that, Universe”

“I’m being serious!” he throws his arms into the air. “Everything! Everything is happening so quickly! I just got Lars back, we’ve barely had any time to talk since I’ve been running the school, and now he’s leaving again, Sadie and the Suspects broke up, Connie’s thinking about applying to a college halfway across the country, and I’m really proud of her and wish her nothing but the best  because she deserves the best, but I miss her, I miss talking to her, I miss going on dates with her, but she’s so busy studying that I’ve been seeing less and less of her since fall, and don’t even get me started on the gems, they think they know everything about me just because they’ve raised me my entire life, but-”

He’s suddenly cut off by the sound of Spinel laughing hysterically. Steven blushes heavily, and turns to her to see her wiping tears from her eyes. 

“Wow,” she bellows, barely trying to keep the laughter out of her voice. “Talk about irony” 

“Huh? What’s so funny?” Steven’s voice squeaks in embarrassment.

“You.” She replies, wiping tears from her eyes. “You sang this big inspirational number to me about changing for good this, and change is for the best that, and all that talk about how you need to embrace the bad change before you can earn the good, and now you’re coming to me about it?” 

Steven blinks. “I...don’t think I ever said that last part”

“Eh, you implied it” Spinel shrugs. “I guess what I’m trying to say is, if you’ve been through all of this dramatic change before and came out of it just fine, why is this any different?” 

Well that’s a pretty stupid question. “Didn’t you hear anything I said?” Steven scoffs. “It’s different because all of my friends are changing. They’re all moving on with their lives. I don’t have that option”

Spinel shrugs. “Well, why don’t you?” 

“Why don’t I what?”

“Why don’t you have that option?”

Steven blinks. “I don’t follow”. 

Spinel snorts. “You’re the one who told me that nobody could change how I felt except me, right? By that very same logic you told me, isn’t that true about you? Nobody can change how you feel either, Universe. If everyone is moving too fast for you, it isn’t up to them to tell you what pace you should be moving at. It’s not up to them how you work through your feelings about processing all this stuff”. 

“That...doesn’t seem like very sound advice coming from someone who tried to ‘process’ her feelings by trying to kill the earth”

“That’s not my point! My point is that I came to my senses on my own terms. I burnt myself out on anger and then I let myself begin to move on. If I’d forced myself to move on earlier, I neva’ would’ve stopped being angry. I coulda’ taken it out on the diamonds if I wasn’t careful.” She snorts, and takes a small step closer to him and places a hand on his shoulder. “The point is that I know betta than most what it feels like when everyone’s moving on without ya. S’matter of fact, I probably know betta than everyone what that’s like. And I also know that if you don’t take things at your own pace, or if you just leave things the way are, you’ll end up in a much worse place. If I’d left things be, I’d still be stuck in that gemforsaken garden, and if I hadn’t burnt myself out and let the planet die, I’d just be stuck on a dead Earth. If ya keep forcing yourself to change to keep up with your friends, you’re just gonna end up stuck somewhere too”. 

...She does have a point, but…

“What about my friends? I’m just supposed to...let them go? I just have to sit around and watch them move on without me?” 

“Well, have they let you go yet?”

“What do you mean? Lars just left for space the other day.”

Spinel shakes her head. “I mean, your friends who are leaving, did they say goodbye? Did they let you know they were leaving?” 

“Well, yeah, but-” 

“Then they haven’t left you behind. Pink never said goodbye to me, Steven. She never told me where she was going. This Lars person, whoever he is, telling you he’s going to space, that’s more than Pink ever told me about Earth. I may not know as much as I think I do about friendship, Steven, but friends come back. Look at you,” she gestures vaguely towards him with a hand. “I left with the diamonds seemingly “forever”, and you still came back.” She smirks. “And I’m guessing this Connie girl was the one I saw talking to you on Earth? She couldn’t keep her hands off of you, Universe, I wouldn’t worry about her ever leaving you behind, even if she does move halfway across the galaxy or whatever it was you said to me”.

Steven blushes. “Country”, he corrects. 

“Whatever. Point is, Universe, if your friends really are your friends, then they won’t leave you behind when they go through some big exciting change. They’ll take you with them, even if it’s only in spirit” 

Steven snorts.  “And since when are you such an expert on friendship?” 

Spinel smiles upon catching onto the playful nature of his tone, and reaches into her pocket and pulls out a diamond communication device. She smiles at it, fiddling with it in her hands. “As much as you say they’re hard to get along with, my time with the diamonds really has given me a new perspective on friendship.” She offers the communication device out to him, and he takes it from her. “They gave this to me when we got back from Earth. They told me that if I ever got lonely all I’d need to do was twist this device in my hands and they’d be there for me, no matter where they were in the galaxy.” 

She takes it back from him. “They taught me to love again, Steven. They taught me that if someone loves you, they aren’t going to run out on you. If they’re going too fast for you, they’ll slow down and wait for you to catch up so they can walk beside you”. 

Steven laughs. “I’m starting to think they taught you more than I know, Spinel” 

She laughs. “Me? More knowledgeable than Steven Universe, best friend of the galaxy?”  She brings a hand to her gem. “I’m honored”. 

Steven laughs again, but before he can say anything else, his phone starts buzzing in his pocket. He pulls it out, and Spinel stretches her head over his shoulder to read the caller I.D. on the screen. 

Connie.

“See? What’d I tell ya?” she grins at him, and gives him thumbs up. He rolls his eyes at her, and leaps from White’s throne and gently floats to the ground so he can have a bit more privacy. 

“Hello?”

“Steven?” Connie’s panicked voice replies. “Are you okay? I’m so sorry I missed your calls, I was going to call back as soon as I finished studying for the night, and then my parents took me out for a movie and I forgot, and-”

Steven chuckles. “Woah, whoa, Connie. It’s okay. Everything’s okay” he says, and begins to head towards the warp pad to go back home where the reception is decidedly better.  Just as he’s about to warp back out, he turns around to face White’s throne one last time. Spinel, still standing where she had been moments ago, stretches an arm into the air to wave goodbye. 

“Actually,” Steven admits as the warp stream begins to encompass him. “Everything’s not okay.” 

#my writing #suf #steven universe future #su #steven universe

[saltwatersweets]

I Could Even Learn How to Love Me

author’s note: it’s ya boi back on their bs. anyways this idea was based off a post i saw like a week ago but i’ve looked everywhere and just cannot find it. that’s tumblr for you i guess.

anyways, i don’t think there are a ton of warnings for this fic (unlike the last one, ho boy), but just in case, this has what’s certainly not a clean cut happy ending, but it’s more bittersweet and hopeful, so certainly not a sad ending either. also some hints to ptsd because steven. if i missed anything, please tell me! please.

also if i had a typo fucking drag me across the floor until i fix it. you are given full permission.

“Life is… well, life is really different these days.”

He got in his car, the keys jingling softly from his fingertips. Today, he drove alone.

“I’ve been trying to get used to everyone changing, but it still feels kind of wrong. It’s not nearly as bad as it was when the Off-Colors graduated from Little Homeschool, though, so that’s nice.”

There have actually been a few more graduations since then; he went to all of them. The second one involved Little Larimar, Snowflake, and a Nephrite, which Centi (after all these years, he had never really wanted to start calling her Nephrite. And after all these years, she had never corrected him.) seemed especially excited about, giving the recent graduate a big hug. The last one was newer, only happened about a week ago. Seeing the Heaven Beetles, Cherry, and Freckles (the Lapis he and, well, Lapis had convinced to join Little Homeschool) go had been especially sad, but it was made a softer blow by Freckles joining Garnet and combining a dance and yoga class. Cherry even bought herself a phone and got Pearl’s number!

“Oh! Speaking of the Off-Colors, Lars and his crew have been in space for a while, but I called them a couple days ago and he said he’d promise to visit Earth soon, so I’m excited about that!”

It’s not like Steven had only visited Lars once in the few months he’d been in space; he hadn’t! But the Off-Colors had been almost finished exploring the moon base that Stevonnie had been trapped on, so they agreed to go back to Earth for a few months. Lars seemed pretty excited to see his parents again, and considering the… strained relationship the family once had in the past, Steven was happy for him.

And even though the two had gone their separate ways, Steven knew that Lars wanted to see Sadie again.

“Sadie and Shep have made a few more songs and have been pretty successful, and I’m happy for them! I’ve so far gotten their songs for a really low price; I guess there’s a friends and family discount?”

The last time he had seen Sadie had been nearly a month ago, and she looked… really happy. Despite being nearly four years younger than her, he felt proud of her. Shep was chill as ever, giving him a pat on the back when they saw him, and letting him play their instruments. Their new songs are certainly different from Sadie’s past rock style, but they’re still a great listen.

The duo’s official “band name” (can it be called a full band with only two people?) is “The Daffodils”. He feels it fits.

“Connie’s checked out a few college campuses! She seems really excited to get enrolled somewhere, and I’m excited for her! 

I’m really going to miss her, though… but she promised she’d visit me every weekend, and we’re going to video chat a lot while she’s there! Plus, I’ve still got another year at least until I have to let go of… of this, I guess, so I should be able to pull myself together by then.”

She had toured a couple colleges before asking him if he wanted to come to one: Empire City University. He had been to Empire City a few times, sure, and had seen pictures, but no part of him was prepared for the sheer size of this college. Not even the hotel he and his dad (and Pearl) had stayed at all those years ago was as big as this college. It was bigger than Little Homeschool, and that place had to be huge in order to fit in every Gem’s needs! 

...And… it fit all of Connie’s needs, too.

He tried to ignore how awful it’ll feel in the future when she starts going to some college, and had no personal interest in asking Garnet how he’ll react.

Stars, he’s going to miss her. He’s going to miss her so much. He wondered if this is what the Diamonds felt like when he left to stay on Earth. He really hopes not, for everyone’s sake. The last thing he wants to do is become clingy to his girlfriend.

“But on the bright side! Connie and I have been officially dating as significant others for almost two months, and she says she’s always going to be there for me, so I believe her. I mean, she saved my life when I was basically dying, and… ohhhhh boy I’m not going to go into that now. That’s a whole bucket of worms to open and sort through at a later date."

He’s not quite sure when they began to fall in love. It may have been from the very moment they locked eyes (Lars, at the time, certainly seemed to think so), or perhaps it happened gradually, over time, as they became closer and closer. At least, it mostly seems to be the latter idea with how Steven fell for her, but he isn’t ruling out the former option just yet. He’s not certain how he really views her, whether it be as a romantic partner or a platonic partner. 

Neither of them care. It doesn’t really matter what they call each other, because they love each other all the same.

“Speaking of basically dying, heh, the Diamonds have been pretty great these past few months, what with them not… smothering me all the time. And I’m glad they haven’t smothered Spinel too much, either. I don’t think they should become too reliant on each other, but so far they seem… really happy. I’m happy for them, too. They visited Little Homeworld a couple months ago, and Spinel really loved all the meep-morp stations. The Diamonds were a liiiiiiittle too big to walk around though, heh.”

He’s visited them a few times in the past few months. It was… difficult, to say the least, to talk to White after he yelled about how he just wanted to fix everything, how he was supposed to make things better, because that was what he was for, wasn’t it? 

He hated the shocked yet horrified look on her face. It’s somehow even worse than the one she gave him after ripping his gem out, and that one is up there.

After a while, though, they were able to connect and he understood her a little bit more. She even apologized for removing his gem, which was… certainly good character development. Guess she can add “sorry” to saying “please” and “thank you” to everyone, even lower life forms, huh?

Blue and Yellow have been okay, too, if a little purposeless after not being in power anymore. (Boy, does he know that feeling.0 He hasn’t seen Blue cry once in months, and most Gems can actually talk to Yellow without cowering in fear. Also a start. Her large appearance is made slightly less terrifying due to the small, pink Gem who spends a good portion of her time on Yellow’s shoulder, he supposes.

He’s really proud of how happy Spinel seemed last time they talked to each other, which is a strange feeling, since she is over six-thousand years older than him. She’s really gotten along with Volleyball (and laughs every time she calls her that name), and a lot of Gems who remained on Homeworld really look like they enjoy her company. Heck, last time he saw her, she only mentioned Pink twice! Steven hopes she’s moved on. He hopes he will someday, too.

“Bismuth, Peridot, and Lapis have loved working at Little Homeschool this past year, and honestly it’s great to see them more often since they’re so much closer. Lapis managed to save a few things from the barn, like some of her meep-morps! Bismuth doesn’t like Camp Pining Hearts as much as the others do, but she still likes seeing them get so excited about new seasons. Oh, and Peridot has learned even more about Earth culture! Let’s hope she doesn’t find out about memes, huh?”

The last time he saw the trio was a few days ago. It was… nice, talking to them after everything that happened. Bismuth was a really good sport about repairing the construction to Little Homeworld after the damage he caused, and he’s grateful for that. 

Peridot and Lapis still have been pretty sad about Pumpkin, so much so that he almost wants to create a new sentient plant for them to hang around. But… considering what happened last time he tried that, it doesn’t seem like a good idea. They’ve so far busied themselves with making more meep-morps, talking about Camp Pining Hearts on Tweeter (when did Peridot get so many followers? He’s the savior of literally the entire universe, and yet he only has seventy-two), and teaching students about Earth.

One of the students happened to be Navy. That was… a very awkward reunion.

“Jasper and Curly - one of the Lapises who was terraforming what used to be a perfectly untouched planet - still haven’t joined Little Homeschool yet, which I’m kinda bummed about, but they seem happy doing their own thing. We even got Jasper to talk to a few of the Gems about channeling anger into expelling it out- well, that sort of thing. She hasn’t been so aggressive lately, and she’s a fun sparring partner to have!”

It’s not for lack of trying that she hasn’t joined the school yet; Steven’s been wanting her to at least try it ever since it was built. But she hasn’t, and he’s trying to learn to let that go. The part of him that wants to help, though, insists otherwise. If he can help her, then he should.

Maybe then he can be useful again.

No. Dad says he shouldn’t think like that anymore. He can’t. He doesn’t want to think that way anymore.

“Dad and the Gems have been… they’ve really been great. I just… they’re the ones who told me to go here, you know? Well, okay, it was mostly Dad, since Gems don’t really have this sort of stuff -though I can think of a few Gems who probably need it, but… you know what I mean. They really care about me, even though sometimes I probably don’t deserve it… But I really love them a lot. And I know they love me too. And I’m happy for that.”

And it’s true; they have been pretty great about all this, especially with everything that’s happened. Especially with everything that’s he’s done that’s probably his fault… They’ve been great at telling him that it’s not.

He thinks Dad still does love Rose despite everything she’s done, and to say Steven didn’t know how to react to that was an understatement. Of course, he wishes they didn’t have this conversation right before Steven accidentally crushed his van, but nonetheless they sort of talked it out. You know, eventually. Steg is still a fun fusion to form, even though he still misses the long hair.

Garnet has been enjoying “Yoga and Dance Class” (she’s not really good at names) with Freckles, and he’s even been to a few. Finding new corrupted Gems is always hard for him, especially with… recent events, but most really like doing yoga and jamming out to some tunes. Garnet even helped what used to be an Agate’s Pearl and a Lapis feel more comfortable regularly fusing. 

Amethyst still regularly hangs out with Steven at places like Fish Stew Pizza and Funland, and a couple of the Famethysts started helping around at Funland, too. Even a few Rose Quartzes came around once in a while, and the meetings were certainly… awkward, to say the least, but were enjoyable nonetheless. She really looks like she feels at home with the other Quartzes, and even has warmed up to Jasper a little bit. She really is mature now, but they still act childish sometimes. And maybe that’s okay. Maybe. He’s still getting used to this whole it’s okay to have interests thing.

Pearl has talked to the other Pearls quite a few times; they really get along. One Pearl, a cream colored one, had even been part of the rebellion before she was corrupted and the “terrifying renegade” had been very excited to see her again. Volleyball goes to Little Homeschool a lot. She’s not enrolled there, but loves the cheerfulness of the place and seeing how happy the other Pearls (especially Blue and Yellow Pearl, who still haven’t gotten a nickname from Steven) are. She’s surprisingly good at art (maybe juggling had given her good and steady hands), but not quite as good as Blue Pearl. She doesn’t seem to mind at all.

Oh, yeah, and Pearl finally got a license. He doesn’t want to be in the backseat with her speeding and breaking the law ever again, even if it is for a cute girl she likes.

Steven’s gotten a lot better at driving lately. He almost turned pink just pulling up about half an hour ago due to all the traffic, but aside from road-rage, he’s alright. When he stepped out from the Dondai, he looked up and sighed. 

He had to at least try and get better. For them. He’d do it for them.

And maybe one day, he’ll do it for himself, too.

“So, to answer your question, things have been… pretty good. A little stressful for sure, but the Gems and I have really started to understand each other and be on the same level. I’m really glad that they’re giving me my space while also being there when I need them. It’s… it’s really nice. It hurt to tell them about what White did while they were under her control, but they took it better than expected. I was so… scared to tell them that yeah, Mom’s gone, she’s been gone for eighteen years now. I thought they’d get angry at White for taking my Gem out, or… or me, for taking Rose away. But they weren’t. I guess they’d expected Mom to be gone for a while now?”

The room was getting smaller, and he tried to push on.

“But, yeah. I’m- well, I don’t think I’m okay right now, at least not yet. But I’m definitely better than I was before, and that’s a start, right?”

“That is a start.” His new therapist replied, checking the time for how long this session would be. Only six more minutes; they hoped that would be enough time to let the teen think about some things until next session, should he choose to attend. “I’m glad you’re not comparing how far you’ve grown with how far you should be. You’re already on the right track to becoming a healthier young adult. I do, however, hope you realize that I really have no idea who you’re talking about.”

Steven blushed, and they were happy to see that it seemed like a normal, human blush, a light pink across the cheeks instead of the neon glow they had heard about from the boy’s family. “Heh, that’s what Cherry said when I talked about what’s been going on since the Earth nearly died. Again. You should meet the Gems and humans; you’d probably like them. Plus, I’m pretty sure a lot of them need this sort of thing way more than I do…” His voice began to become quiet. 

“What makes you say that?” They asked, clicking their pen absentmindedly. He was tapping his foot rather loudly, though, so they assumed he didn’t mind it.

“I just… I know I’m messed up, you know? But I should be better about it by now. Other people have been through way worse, and I’ve been able to fix them, so why can’t I fix myself?”

If they had glasses, they would be pulling them down in disappointment. “Are you alright with me slightly insulting you?” They asked.

“Can’t be worse than what I’ve heard.” Steven replied, a little playfully, before taking a sip of his water. “Bring it on.” “Okay.” They began. “You absolute moron.”

They really should have expected him to spit out his drink.

“I take back what I said about you not comparing yourself to where you should be; that is literally what you just did. Right now.” They sighed. “There is no set place to how you should feel. Based on what your father described to me in his call, you have been through things no one should ever go through, much less a child to young adult. You are perfectly valid in not feeling okay, and you shouldn’t have to have the full responsibility of ‘fixing’ yourself or others.”

“I know.” He said, looking away. “Just… everyone’s relied on me to help them, and to be there for them, and just… guide them through their problems for them. And suddenly everyone’s able to do that on their own and don’t need me anymore. And suddenly I’m the one who’s got problems but just… sometimes it still feels like there’s no one there.”

“I’m there,” they smiled. “And I’m sure your family is too. They wanted to help you by sending you to me, you know. I’m sure they care about you just as much as you care about them, and they want to help you if they’re getting you help.”

Steven was silent for the rest of the session.

“Here is my phone number, should you come back next week.” They said, handing him a business looking card.

“Okay.” Steven said, putting the card in his jacket’s pocket for safekeeping and opening the door. “See you later?”

They smiled. “See you later.”

Moments after the door shut with a soft click, they began immediately looking anything and everything they could about Gem history.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The drive home is silent, music blasting in Steven’s ears so loudly he can’t think. He likes it that way. Personally, he doesn’t want to think about anything right now. He just wants to get home. It’s no Sadie Killer and the Suspects, but it’s good. It was written by the creator of Crying Breakfast Friends, too, so that’s probably the reason.

The house, now fully repaired after Cactus Steven’s rampage, is near silent, despite all three of the Gems looking at him. He goes to set the car keys on the counter, before sitting on the couch next to Garnet.

Amethyst is the first to speak. “Sooooo… how was it?”

He doesn’t really know what to say. Difficult? Emotionally taxing? He didn’t even do as much emotional talking that his therapist probably wanted him to, so he can’t say that one. Enlightening?

“...Sensible,” is what he chooses.

“Do you think you’ll go back sometime soon?” Pearl asks, worry thinly veiled in her voice. He looks up at her.

“...I think so. Yeah. Sometime in a few weeks.”

Immediately the Gems are crowding him, but he doesn’t quite feel suffocated. All three are saying nonsensical words of gratitude and love, and he loves them too.

Eventually, the talking dies down, and he is able to catch his breath a little bit. Garnet’s words are almost quiet, but he hears them with ease. “We’re so proud of you, Steven.”

A small, content smile half-tugs at the corners of his lips. “I know.”

And maybe one day, he can look back and be proud of himself, too.

#steven universe #su #original character #pearl su #pearl #cg pearl #amethyst su #amethyst #garnet su #garnet #everyone else is mentioned and i really don't feel like tagging all that #hints to ptsd #bittersweet ending #hopeful ending #the steven fucking gets therapy fic we all needed #atlantis scrolls

[e350tb]

Steven Universe: Marooned Together - Chapter Twenty-Eight

Chapter Twenty-Eight

“So, what’re you thinkin’, runt?”

Lars rolled his eyes as Jasper sat down next to him.

“I’m thinkin’ next time you call me ‘runt’, I’ll throw you out the airlock.”

“Not if I do it first.”

They chuckled, but Lars’ soon cut off as the young man stared down at the floor once more.

“...What do I do, Jas’?” he asked. “I know I’ve gotta do something but… I’ve gotta look after you guys too, right? I just… she can’t even stand to be around you, and… ugh, why’s being a captain gotta be so hard?”

“Well, if you don’t want to…” Jasper offered.

Lars glared at her for just a moment.

“And why would you wanna go back there? To Homeworld? To Yellow Diamond’s court?” asked Lars, “You told me what it was like! You were perfect, but they treated you like… like…”

“It wasn’t just them.”

Jasper frowned, staring at the engine, listening to its humming and watching the gentle vibration.

“On Homeworld, everything the Diamonds’ said was law,” she said, “They told me I wasn’t good enough, so… so I told myself I wasn’t good enough. Part of me still tells myself that.”

“Yeah, you’ve told me,” nodded Lars, “And I’ve told you it’s bullshit.”

“I know,” muttered Jasper.

“You didn’t answer my question, Jasper.”

Jasper bit her lip, and was silent for a little while longer.

“He never saw me as bad, you know?” she said at last, “Right up until the end, he tried to help me, and I just… spat on him, you know? So maybe I just want to let them know… well, I’m still a disaster, but…”

“Yeah, I get you.”

Jasper crossed her arms.

“What about you?” she asked, “What’s stopping you? I mean, really?”

Lars shrugged.

“I dunno,” he replied, “It just… seems too good to be true.”

He sat back, letting out a long breath.

“What if we get there, and they’re already dead?” he asked, “Like Mom and Dad? Like Sadie? What if… what if there’s no point?”

The two sat silently for a few minutes after the admission, the truth of his words hanging thickly in the air between them. Loss was one of the few common languages that bound them together, and yet, in this instance, further words seemed unnecessary.

Jasper put her hand on his shoulder.

“Well,” she said, “There’s only one way to find out.”

They shared a glance. Eventually, Lars nodded.

“Okay,” he said, “Just… gimme some time to think of a plan…”

Lapis stood by the door, looking towards the bridge. She could see Jasper in one of the seats near the helm, gazing out into the darkness of space. Just looking at the quartz made her shudder - everything they had been, everything she had been, ran back to her, a bad memory bursting out of the mental cupboard in which she’d been securely stowed away.

She shouldn’t say anything. She really shouldn’t. And yet, here they were. What else could she do?

Maybe - and this felt like an extraordinarily long shot - maybe she could help?

She took a deep breath - in and out - and stepped forward.

“I know you’re there, Lazuli.”

She instantly froze again, having taken only three steps onto the bridge. Slowly, Jasper turned her chair around. They stared at each other for some time, the tension in the air palpable. She looked over Jasper’s new form, the conspicuous lack of a Diamond, the strange casualty of it - something she’d never expect from the militaristic gem. She regarded the blue spots on Jasper’s form - the scars of corruption; strange, even sickening. She was so different - and yet despite everything, she still felt vaguely like she was looking at herself through a funhouse mirror, her own flaws reflected in the big, orange gem.

It was like a duel - who would draw first?

“How… how are you here?” Lapis asked at last.

Jasper shrugged slightly.

“When the Diamonds woke the Cluster,” she said, “They must’ve used the same… energy? Attack, maybe? It was like what they did with corruption, I mean. Just… the opposite. Instead of ruining minds and forms, it was… controlling the Cluster. And I guess they accidentally cured me.”

She looked down.

“I was in that bubble - that probably saved me from being ground into dust with the rest of the Earth,” she continued, “First thing I remember was waking up here.”

“And Lars… took you in?”

Jasper snorted.

“After I beat the crap out of him,” she replied, “Though I think he remembers it differently.”

She looked down at her hands, left index finger picking at a small, blue claw just below her knuckle.

“It took a long time to unlearn everything,” she said, “I guess I’m still unlearning it all. I mean, Rose Quartz? Pink Diamond? Every time I think about it, I just feel like… like strangling her. Or, him, I guess. ”

Lapis furrowed her brow.

“I won’t let you,” she said firmly.

Jasper chuckled humourlessly.

“I know that human boy isn’t Rose or Pink or whatever,” she said, “I think that was the hardest thing to get my head around. I had no enemy and no Diamond; I had to work out how to live for me.”

She leaned forward.

“But what did you really want to talk about, Lazuli?”

Lapis swallowed.

“You hurt me,” she said.

“You hurt me,” replied Jasper.

Lapis pursed her lips.

“I just… every time I look at you, you remind me of who we were,” she said, “Of who I was. And… and I tell myself I’m not that person anymore, but…”

“Just say it.”

Jasper’s expression was firm, unreadable.

“I… I still want to do it, Jasper,” replied Lapis, “I still want to hurt you. I still want to drag you into space and throw you into a sun, or bury you in molten lava, or… or so many things. And I thought I was past that for so long, but now I’m having these thoughts and…”

She looked down at her hands.

“Have I really changed?” she asked, her voice tired, “Or am I just good at pretending I’m not a monster?”

Jasper crossed her arms.

“You wanna know what I think?” she asked.

“Not really,” Lapis admitted, but she had initiated the conversation, so there was little she could do to stop her from speaking. “But go ahead.”

“I think you are a monster,” replied Jasper, “Just like I am. All we can do is put on a mask and hide it away from the world. Just… try to keep the darkness away from the people who are better than us.”

There was another bitter chuckle.

“Why do you think I’m out here? Why do you think Lars is out here?” she continued, “We’ve gotta keep ourselves contained, for the good of everyone. Because we don’t deserve to be out there.”

There was a long silence.

“Well, that was uplifting,” Lapis grunted.

“Tell me I’m wrong,” said Jasper.

Lapis closed her eyes, and remembered her breathing - in and out, in and out.

“I don’t know if you’re wrong about you,” she said at last, “Or Lars or whatever. But you’re wrong about me.”

“And what makes you think that?” asked Jasper.

“Because I’m going right up to Yellow Diamond,” replied Lapis, “I’m gonna find Stevonnie, and I’m gonna take them home. Even if nobody helps me, even if I have to fly over there myself - I’m gonna do it. Because… because I’m…”

She shook her head.

“Because it doesn’t matter what I am. Because I know, deep down, they love me anyway.”

“You do, huh?” Jasper raised an eyebrow.

Lapis rubbed the back of her head.

“I mean, I, uh, I hope they do.”

Jasper grunted, casually pressing a button on her console.

“Captain,” she said, “You got that plan ready of what?”

“Well, I’ve got… half a plan. That’s good, right?”

“Well, you’d better make it a full plan,” replied Jasper, “We got ourselves a dirty, rotten fusion to save.”

#steven universe #marooned together #lapis lazuli #lars barriga #jasper

[neoduskcomics]

If you didn't hear the news, 6 new episodes of Steven Universe were recently made available on the Cartoon Network app. Go watch them if you're able, and then come back here if you'd care to hear what I thought about them. SPOILERS. SPOILERS. SPOILERS.

Dewey Wins The plot in this episode is basically creating a parallel to Connie's heartbreak over Steven's actions in the last story arc and putting him in her shoes. It's not exactly the most gracefully or subtly executed story device, and I was a bit disappointed when, at the end, I realized that the entire point of it was simply to get Steven to understand why Connie was upset at the beginning of the episode (something that I'm sort of surprised wasn't immediately obvious to him).

That being said, I didn't dislike this episode. We're coming right of the heels of some of the most dramatic and loaded plot in the series, so a lot of it is really just winding down and getting everyone up to speed in the aftermath. It sort of subsists on carrying the momentum of what came before it. While the stuff with Dewey wasn't the most engaging, it was harmless, and they got a couple good jokes out of it.

I was hoping we'd see a bit more of Dewey actually dealing with the consequences of his lackluster-ness as a mayor, which we sort of did, but he didn't have a lot of time to process any of it, since the episode had to shift focus right back onto Steven's relationship issues with Connie. Hopefully, we'll see a future episode that features some actual character growth for Dewey so that this whole story wasn't just a means of getting from point A to point B. Gemcation What do you do when your son is clearly having some kind of personal problem, judging from the fact that he's constantly checking messages on his phone and all bummed out? You drag him to a vacation home that he's clearly disinterested in and try to force uncomfortable conversations about his traumatic space trip, of course. So much sound, emotional clarity going on in these episodes. Kidding aside, though, I did enjoy this one. It was amusing seeing the gems trying to figure out what was bugging Steven (and doing a comically terrible job of it). Pearl's antics got several laughs from me, and it made me feel like the comedy in this series was on point for the first time in a while. The plot wasn't outstanding, but it had a lot of good character moments. Seeing Garnet being awkward and out of her field of expertise was fun, and seeing Greg defer to the gems with helping Steven, only to reassert his role as father was nice to see. The whole cell-phone-reception-race ended predictably, but I do like that interpersonal issues in this show aren't resolved so quickly and easily. It's part of what helps the characters in this show feel like people and not just set pieces, and helps this series about magical gem warriors from outer space feel more grounded. Also, for real, though, that part with Pearl trying to talk to Steven and she kept covering her own mouth. The fuck was that. She totally killed Pink Diamond. Or she knows who killed her. Or she knows something. And someone cursed her or ordered her not to talk. Maybe Rose. Who the fuck knows. I'm sure everyone has already drawn up like fifty conspiracy theories about it. I'd prefer to just keep my mind open and let myself be surprised, but it's hard not to speculate when the show drops shit like that. Raising the Barn Say bye to Lapis, kids. I mean, you know, again. I'm sure she'll come back, but it is interesting to see such a status-quo-shifting departure happen on the show. Again, I like it when the show has these realistic turns of events. Connie's not gonna immediately make up with Steven. Lapis isn't necessarily going to stay just because Peridot wants to. Now, if I had an issue with all of this, it's probably that the way in which we arrive at these issues (or the resolutions thereof, but we'll get to that) isn't always the most interesting. Like, this episode was good, but it wasn't great. It could've done with more comedy or maybe more dialogue that was of consequence to the characters, rather than looping around the motions of Peridot very obviously avoiding the situation before finally and predictably confronting Lapis at the end. I'm not saying this episode was bad, just that it could've been better. I don't really have a whole lot to say about it other than that. Back to the Kindergarten While not one of my favorite episodes, this was a good episode for Peridot. I like seeing her really grapple with her newfound feelings of despair and distress, and trying to deal with it in an emotionally healthy way. While the sunflowers all dying was a tad predictable, it was still a well-executed plot device, and moving forward with the idea of understanding that while some parts of life will always be sad, there's always a whole world of potential happiness around you. Again, it's a more realistic message and, as a result, it feels more genuine. For there to be highs, there have to be lows. You have to work for your catharsis, and I think that's something this show mostly gets.

The last time we saw Amethyst, Peridot, and Steven hang out was the "shorty squad" episode, and I found this one to be far more interesting. Peridot doesn't simply spend the whole episode moping and then finally realizing some uplifting truth--there's an emotional mini-arc that she goes through: moving from despair to hopefullness, having that hope crushed, and then learning from the experience and finding that hope again in a different place. Moving through a range of different feelings is, I think, what makes for a more affective episode than having basically a single tone or conflict that leads you to an inevitable conclusion. Sadie Killer I think this is the first episode involving the cool kid crew that I genuinely enjoyed. There are a handful of episodes in the series are pretty much devoid of magical gem stuff, but out of all of those, this is definitely one of the better ones, if for no reason other than that it just has some great character development and progress for Sadie. For the first time, we really explore her as a person, not as she relates to Lars, but just herself. It was neat seeing her feel the weight of her monotonous and stressful life, and then finally break through and come out of her shell of her own volition—not because she was forced to in some contrived plot about how she doesn’t communicate well with her mom.

The musical number was fun and it was a great way to have Sadie let loose, doing something she enjoys and showing a side of her that you always sort of detected was there but she never just came out and expressed it. Sadie didn’t suddenly have a dark side for the sake of this episode; you’ve seen her deal with anxiety and stress and dealing with bullshit for five seasons. It’s good to finally see a culmination to all of that.

If I had an issue with this episode, it’s maybe that it just ends with her quitting the job. I would’ve liked to have seen her really deliberate over the situation, either prior to or in the aftermath of the decision, rather than simply using it as an ending revelation. But apart from that small gripe, it was a great character episode.

Kevin Party

I think this episode was a bit of a mixed bag. I think they really nailed the awkwardness of having Steven and Connie struggling to confront one another. The nervous tension is present in every scene of that episode, basically from the moment Kevin informs Steven that Connie would be at the party. Aside from that, though, the episode feels mostly like another one of those terrible “guy gets bad relationship advice from person he very obviously shouldn’t be taking relationship advice from and then inevitably screws things up before finally coming clean and being honest with himself which in return earns the trust/affection of the girl” plots. It’s played out and this story didn’t really offer anything new to the formula.

Not only that, but is Kevin just going to be a thing in every episode where Steven and Connie are having awkward relationship issues? I mean, we’ve already seen them embarrass/humiliate him for being a douche. I thought this time we might get something different. When he brings up that girl he apparently broke up with, I thought we might actually explore Kevin’s character and see why he is the way he is, and make him maybe a more complex character. But, no, we just saw him continue to be an asshat for self-gain before it blows up in his face.

Overall, I do like that we got to see Steven actually mess up in a personal matter and not just a magical destiny matter, and that’s something he really had to struggle with and learn from. At the same time, I feel like getting into that string of episodes and then leaving it was not the most gracefully executed. I’m glad that it happened, but I also sort of wish they went about it in a more interesting way, especially in a show that has frequently demonstrated, in the past, an ability to break the mold and go against the grain with its characters and storytelling.

But, you know. Connie has a cute haircut, now. So there’s that.

Overall

This was a nice chunk of episodes that left me feeling ultimately satisfied. I was expecting a string of episodes that leaned more toward the slice-of-life element of the show, but I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed them. To me, these were far superior to the slice-of-life episodes of Season 3 that I complained about. I found the plots more compelling, the characters were more engaging, and I even thought that the jokes were funnier (Steven’s oblivious napkin-stealing cracks me up).

Not to mention the fact that we’re seeing a lot of changes to the status quo. And not ones that feel like they were made just to switch things up. They all feel like logical outcomes based on what we know about the characters. Mayor Dewey was always ignorant and incompetent. Lapis was always against getting mixed up in Gem business, even Peridot at first. Sadie was always having her patience and tolerance for bullshit tested. It’s a good feeling when you have developments in your story that feel less like arbitrary sources of conflict and more like payoff to what we’ve known and felt all along.

I hope we get more episodes soon. Even if the “main plot” doesn’t advance, I just miss being in this world with these characters. This last Steven Bomb reminded me a bit of why I like the series so much in the first place. I hope we don’t end up like Steven, waiting fruitlessly for an update for days on end.

#steven universe #review #season 5

[stevenuniversallyreviews]

Episode 56: Love Letters

“Three’s a crowd.”

So, it turns out time passes in Beach City! Its residents aren’t in a Springfield Limbo where seasons change but ages stay the same, and this opens a whole new realm of possibilities to expand the ongoing narrative of Steven growing up by having him actually grow up. We really shouldn’t take this for granted, considering how easy it is for a cartoon to freeze characters (especially child characters) in time, and honestly my biggest initial takeaway from Love Letters is that it’s the first episode that deals with how the passage of time by itself, rather than a series of events like Steven’s adventures, affects the show and its characters. This is a show where Steven, Lars, and Sadie disappeared for a week and nobody seemed to notice, so yeah, it matters.

The reason time alone is a factor is because we focus on the all-but-forgotten Jamie the Mailman. After a cameo in Mirror Gem/Ocean Gem, Jamie disappears without a trace for thirty episodes. This isn’t remarkable for a side character, especially one whose only other appearance is the first scene of the third episode. Jamie may be sweet and funny in Cheeseburger Backpack, but on a show full of sweet and funny characters he was easily lost in the background.

Well, it turns out his absence for the latter half of Season 1 has an in-universe explanation, one that allows the show to hang a quick lampshade on the common trope of vanishing characters while reintroducing him to those of us that forgot he existed: Jamie was literally gone, looking for his big break in the bright lights and busy streets of the Sunflower State, the big KS itself, home of Dorothy Gale and the Rockin’ Chalkin’ Jayhawks, that’s right, Kansas.

I’m really glad he’s back! Jamie is similar to Ronaldo in his role as a background character and occasional lead whose cluelessness is played for laughs and occasional drama. Both are passionate about self-expression (Jamie through acting, Ronaldo through blogging and the occasional documentary) and show some skill at it, but think themselves masters. However, where Ronaldo fluctuates between funny and grating at the drop of a fedora, Jamie is a consistent force for entertainment; he never reaches the comedic highs of Ronaldo’s A-game, but we never suffer any lows.

The secret, I think, is that Jamie’s core kindness evokes empathy instead of annoyance when he goes off the rails. His silliness doesn’t hurt anyone, and in an episode where he could’ve turned bitter and nasty over romantic rejection, he handles it surprisingly well considering his maturity level in other regards. This reaction may be a thematic necessity to teach Steven and Connie and the audience a generic “honesty is good” lesson, but it sets the tone for Jamie’s fascinating ability to be self-important without being a jerk.

Jamie’s overacting always benefits from Eugene Cordero’s veteran comedy chops, but is amped up even further by Lamar Abrams and Hellen Jo’s delightful brand of hypersilliness (see: Steven and Garnet’s workout in Future Vision, Amethyst’s burial service in Watermelon Steven, all of Rising Tides, Crashing Skies). Jamie’s love letter is zany enough, but actually seeing him write it does wonders to enhance what could have been a simple letter-reading sequence. Even if Jamie didn’t literally write the letter this way, it’s a nice peek into his ridiculous self-image, complete with anime twinkles.

Steven and Connie are classic theatrical meddlers in a classic farce, where love letters gone awry and easily avoidable misunderstandings create melodramatic tension. It’s a nifty twist that they aren’t playing matchmakers despite their resemblance to middlemen like Don Pedro or Dolly Levi, but just want to spare Jamie’s feelings. And I love that Steven, a hero with a weakness for schmaltz, rejects the idea of Jamie and Garnet as a couple even before Garnet does, solidifying that neither the show nor our well-meaning but misguided kids are going in that direction.

(Love Letters also don’t drag out secret of who wrote “Garnet’s” response letter, which further subverts typical farce tropes but probably has more to do with the eleven minute runtime.)

As Jamie says, Steven and Connie are super cute. It’s nice to have them as supporting characters (albeit the characters with the most screen time); we get snippets of them just hanging out in most of their episodes, but this time it doesn’t contrast with more serious drama like Connie’s replacement by a doppelganger or the possible end of their friendship. This is the first full episode of the two kids just being kids since Winter Forecast (oh look, another Jo/Abrams episode), and it’s soon to be followed by Connie’s temporary indoctrination; heavy episodes like Full Disclosure and Sworn to the Sword may be great, but a respite is appreciated.

Fortunately, a calmer (if wackier) tone doesn’t mean Love Letters lacks good character moments. Connie gets a quiet display of her growing emotional intelligence in the back-to-back scenes of Jamie’s admission of multiple rejections and the rewrite of Garnet’s letter. In the first scene, after hearing all about Jamie’s emotionally vulnerable state, she sees no issue with handing him another rejection and has to be stopped by Steven; whether or not ripping off the bandage is the right course of action, Connie’s reaction shows a distinct lack of tact. But in the second scene, she’s the head writer of the revamped letter (using the power of torrid soap opera know-how); even if she and Steven are way off-track in terms of how romance works here, she understands the problem and wants to help.

Little slip-ups and corrections like these do a great job of showing how far Connie has come from Bubble Buddies without losing the realistic awkwardness that makes her so endearing. Her disadvantage to Steven on the emotional intelligence front also continues to even out their relationship, as she schools him in book smarts throughout the series and will soon become a far more capable tactical fighter to his natural talent, a la Katara and Aang. Just because Steven isn’t an idiot and Connie isn’t emotionless doesn’t mean their differences have to go away, and Love Letters is a great example of her lower-key foil duty in action.

Garnet is mostly great as the oblivious, then apathetic subject of Jamie’s affection. Her sexualized emergence from the sea is played for laughs thanks to over-the-top visual effects and Estelle’s exaggerated sultriness. Visually, while her introduction may evoke classic Birth of Venus imagery, the more amusing sight gag can be found in the, erm, interesting positioning of Jamie’s mailsack malebag mailbag as he’s filled with sudden lust:

But back to Garnet. Her instant and insistent dismissal of Jamie may be cold, but it’s fair and faithful to her character: Garnet is locked down on the relationship front, and we’ve seen how little she cares about the feelings of human strangers from her interactions with Kofi (and her general demeanor). She benefits from having little to do with Steven and Connie’s scheming, which makes her another victim of poor communication who gets fed up with what she perceives to be a pushy admirer instead of doubling down on her bluntness to a point that might make her seem mean; it also reinforces how important is to take the feelings of both people involved in a crush into account.

Even so, my biggest/only issue with Love Letters is her final conversation with Jamie, where she dismisses his infatuation as a performance. I guess I get that she’s trying to let him down easier than before and is putting things in a way he understands, but there’s a much better way to differentiate between love and a crush than essentially saying his crush is delusional. As someone who’s had crushes and has been in love, sure, the latter is strong enough to make the former look tame in retrospect. But that doesn’t make infatuation an act, and for a show that’s all about feelings, Steven Universe could do way better at explaining Garnet’s point of view without being condescending about someone’s emotions (especially the emotions of a young audience).

That said, Jamie’s response is somewhat true: local theater, at least, is really solid advice.

Future Vision!

Beyond local theater being in the future, Love Letters gets a nice resolution in Jamie insisting that he’s moved on in I Am My Mom. And then we get to see that, uh, nope, he’s still holding the torch as of Reunited.

Our introduction to Barb is a long time coming, and the fact that she knows Greg telegraphs their low-key and largely off-screen friendship.

If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have inconsistencies…

Despite Garnet proclaiming that love at first sight doesn’t exist, The Answer more or less shows Ruby and Sapphire’s relationship to be just that. Maybe they spent more time on the surface getting to know each other than it seems, but as per its fairy tale nature, love springs up pretty much immediately. (And it’s great! But maybe don’t have that person be against the notion of instant love.)

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

I enjoy the goofiness here and the dedication to a farcical format for a theatrical character, and as I said, the acknowledgment that time is an actual factor for this show earns some points. But beyond not sticking the landing, and it’s honestly just a little too broad to be a favorite.

Top Fifteen

Steven and the Stevens

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

The Return

Jailbreak

Rose’s Scabbard

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Winter Forecast

On the Run

Warp Tour

Maximum Capacity

The Test

Ocean Gem

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Future Vision

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

No Thanks!

     4. Horror Club      3. Fusion Cuisine      2. House Guest      1. Island Adventure

#love letters #steven universe #su #steven universally #review

[a-vast-horizon]

The Return - Lion and Lars

Oh gosh, I didn’t realize it had been a month since the last update. This one’s longer and took longer to write too, ha.

This time: Lars spends some time with Steven’s Lion.

Read more of The Return [here].

Read on Fanfiction.net [here]/ Read on AO3 [here]

Lars knocked on the door to Steven’s house a bit nervously. He’d been there before, but that was after Steven had possessed him and walked his body in without his awareness—he had been inside, but never really entered.

“Lars! You’re here!” Steven called, and Lars could see him scrambling to open the door through the screen.

“Sure I am,” Lars said. “You said there was someone you wanted me to meet?”

Lars didn’t have a clue who would be at Steven’s house that he’d need to meet; the Off-Colors were staying here, but he already knew them all, and he’d met the Crystal Gems before.

“I wanted you to meet Lion!” Steven beamed, gesturing up to the loft above them, where sure enough, there was a sleeping lion. A lion in a very familiar shade of pink.

“Steven, is this the lion you were talking about on Homeworld? The one with the-“ Lars gestured at his own hair, still unsure how exactly to describe exactly what it was now.

“Yep!” Steven said cheerfully. “I don’t know anyone else that’s, well, been through the same stuff, and since Lion has, I figured you could learn some things from him!”

Lars looked up at Lion, who was sprawled across the floor at the foot of Steven’s bed, one back leg twitching in his sleep.

“Steven, he’s a lion. He can’t talk, can he?”

“No,” Steven said, obviously growing a bit dejected. “Or at least if he can talk, he hasn’t talked to me yet.”

“So what am I supposed to learn from him if he can’t talk? You know about all his powers and stuff, right? Why don’t you just teach me instead?”

“It’s not that simple,” Steven sighed. “Lion’s always doing things I don’t know he can, and even the stuff I do know about, I don’t know how he does it. If I tried to tell you about it, I’d probably wind up leaving out something I didn’t know was important, or explaining it the wrong way, or something. Lion can’t tell you how he does any of this stuff, but I figured you’d probably have a better chance learning it by watching him do it than listening to me tell you about it.”

Steven might have a point there. He was a great kid, but not always the best at explaining things. Lars took another look at Lion, at the fur the same shade of pink as his own skin, the mane the same candyfloss color. If there really was no one else on Earth the same as the two of them, he had to give it a try, right?

“Steven, he’s asleep,” Lars said. Steven, recognizing it as a concession, perked back up.

“Yeah, he naps a lot, but I’m sure he’s gonna wake up soon! Wait, there’s something we can try, give me a sec!”

Steven pulled away from Lars and ran to the kitchen, and Lars took the chance to walk further into the living room. Lion seemed pretty dead to the world. If he learned nothing else here, at least Lars was pretty sure he’d still be able to sleep if he wanted to. He didn’t need sleep anymore, but sometimes it was nice to just block everything out for a few hours. Nice to know he hadn’t lost the ability to do it.

“Steven!” a third voice called. Lars turned to see the Crystal Gems emerging from a glowing door in the rock wall, and honestly, if he hadn’t seen all kinds of stuff like it on Homeworld already, he’d be freaking out a bit right now.

“Steven are you ready for the mission – oh, hello Lars!” Pearl called, noticing the teen in the living room only at the end of her sentence. Lars nodded in recognition, but didn’t talk – Pearl seemed to be a Gem in a hurry right now.

“Oh shoot!” Steven said, a box of those ridiculous Lion Lickers in his hands. “I just invited Lars over! Can’t it wait like, an hour?”

“Nope,” Garnet said, and Steven sighed. He stuck the box back into the freezer and began walking towards the launch pad.

“Wait, where are you going?” Lars asked, confused.

“On a Gem mission,” Steven sighed. “We gotta stabilize some Gem wreckage in the jungle before it crashes with enough force to cause an earthquake. I’m not sure why we’re doing it right now though, I thought it was safe for another couple days?”

The last question was directed at the Gems more than it was at Lars.

“Yes, well, we may have been a bit less careful disrupting the wreckage to pull the ship out than I thought,” Pearl said. “We were very worried about you, Steven.”

Her voice sounded so much like his mother’s had, when he’d first made it back to Earth. Quiet and achingly full of sadness.

“So should I come back another day?” Lars asked.

“If you want to, I guess, but this should be pretty quick. You can just, um, sit on the couch and wait! We’ll be back really soon.” Steven smiled anxiously and patted Lars’s shoulder on his way to the warp pad. Before Lars could even figure out what to say to that, the Gems were gone.

“Well, that just happened,” Lars said, still trying to figure out how he’d come to be in Steven’s living room when Steven wasn’t there but a lion was.

Speaking of the lion, Lars took another look up to the loft, where sure enough, Lion was lying in the same position.

But his eyes were open now.

In a flash, Lion jumped down from the loft and landed in front of Lars, eying the teen in what seemed like a curious manner.

“Gah! Geez, don’t do that to a guy!” Lars complained. Lion just leaned forward to sniff at him, then sat back on his hind legs and continued eying him.

“Heh, I guess you’re a lot like a cat, huh? I guess technically lions are cats. Dunno what Steven was thinking I’d be able to learn from a big fuzzball like you.”

Lars reached forward to attempt petting Lion, but as he did, Lion moved faster than he thought was possible and quickly grabbed Lars’s shirt collar in his teeth, lifting the teen off the ground as he startled.

“Hey! Put me down!” Lars protested, but Lion swung his head to the side, throwing Lars roughly onto Lion’s own back, where Lars clung for dear life. The second Lars seemed to be getting some balance, Lion roared, and something about the roar struck a nerve deep inside Lars. He couldn’t put it in words, but some part of him was almost resonating with the roar.

Lars was so busy being confused by this that he didn’t notice the glowing pink portal that Lion had opened until the two were already through it.

The place where Lars now found himself was like a place from a kid’s storybook, or a dream. It was an enormous field of strawberry plants—huge strawberry plants. In between the enormous leaves, Lars could see flashes and glints of other colors reflecting the sunlight: swords, spears, an enormous mace.

“What is this place?” Lars asked Lion, who only began running through the field. This time, Lars could tell Lion was about to roar a split second before he did: that strange buzzing, pulling, singing sensation fizzled in his core as Lion roared again, and this time Lars watched as a portal sprang into existence in the direction Lion had roared.

This was the kind of thing Lion could do? Was this a power Lars could learn somehow? And if so, how? There was no noise a human could make with the same power as a lion’s roar.

Lars watched in rapt attention as Lion opened a handful more portals to incredible locations (including the island where he and Steven and Sadie had been ‘stranded’ for some time, where he swore he saw a person made of watermelon), finally portalling the two of them back to Beach City.

Several hundred meters from the shore.

Lars flinched and covered his face with his arms, bracing for the impact of salt water, but it never came. Lion continued running, and Lars opened his eyes to see what the deal was.

They were still far from the shore. And Lion was still running. On top of the water.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” Lars cried. “You can freaking walk on water and Steven didn’t think to even mention it?”

With the pace Lion was running, the two reached the shore quickly, and Lion plopped down onto the sand. Lars took the opportunity to slide off Lion’s back and onto the sand before Lion could decide to drag him through another portal and stay there instead, but he didn’t head home yet.

Steven had been right. Lars wanted desperately to learn how to do the incredible things that Lion was able to do. He’d been useful mostly as one end of a doorway so far; he wanted to be able to be helpful even when Steven wasn’t there to access his hair-dimension.

Lion blinked at Lars, looking at the teen expectantly.

“What?” Lars asked.

Lion turned his head to look out at the ocean, in the direction they’d just come from. Where Lion had just run on top of the water.

Did he want Lars to try it, too?

Lars glanced around the beach—old habits die hard, and being self-conscious was a tough one to break. The sun was beginning to set, and there was hardly anyone around. No one seemed to have noticed Lion arriving, either. Even if Lars made a spectacle of himself, there was no one around to gawk.

“Worth a try, I guess,” Lars said, walking nervously toward the edge of the water. He placed one foot forward, as if he was just taking another step, and cautiously brought it down.

His foot slipped below the surface of the water, as anyone else would have expected it to, and Lars stumbled back as seawater soaked through his shoe and into his sock. Homeworld had some nasty things to offer, but wearing a cold, wet sock was still extremely unpleasant.

Lars heard shuffling in the sand beside him, and Lion came to stand next to him. Lion fixed his gaze on Lars for a few moments, and then walked forward to the edge of the water and carefully dipped a paw in. It, too, breached the surface of the water and got wet. Lion backed up and shook the water off of his paw, then took off running without warning, bounding straight for the water, and this time he stayed on the surface. Lion ran in a small circle before coming back into shore, and only a moment after Lion’s feet hit the shore, Lars could feel his nose digging into Lars’s back, pushing him towards the water.

“So, what? I just . . . gotta go fast?” Lars asked. Lion nudged his back again.

“Okay,” Lars said, shifting into a running position. “Let’s try this again.”

Lars took off for the water, taking a few running strides before he reached the waterline again, and he forced himself not to flinch or alter his pace as he reached the water that should have slowed him.

Instead, he was able to keep running, the waves underneath his feet. The feeling of running on water was strange—the ground was constantly shifting, and there was so much give to the surface, like walking on the top of one of those foam pits at a gymnastics studio. It was surreal, and Lars had to force himself to concentrate on keeping his legs moving instead of on the feeling of the surface of the water. He had reached a deeper part of the water, now, and it would be pretty bad if he fell in and had to swim back to shore.

With that thought, Lars turned and started running back towards the shore, carving a wide arc. Back on the beach, Lion was watching him with what he’d call satisfaction, if he had to guess at a lion’s emotions.

He was really doing this. He was running on water.

“LARS!” came a gleeful shout from the beach, and Lars stumbled and splashed into the water—thankfully shallow, only a foot or so deep. He turned to see Steven rushing down to the water from the direction of the Temple, wearing a grin that threatened to split his face in half.

Lars got to his feet and made it to shore by the time Steven reached him and swept him into a practically bone-crushing hug.

“Oh, Lars! I knew you’d be able to learn something!” Steven said, and Lars couldn’t help but smile and feel a little proud of himself. After all, he’d just been able to do something that, as far as he knew, no other human had ever accomplished.

“So what else did he show you? Did you learn anything else?” Steven asked, pulling back to watch Lars’s face, glee clearly spread across his own. Lars nervously ruffled his hair. He could feel the soft heat of a blush spreading across his face, though he wasn’t sure if it was visible given how pink the rest of him already was.

“Well, he did make a whole bunch of portals by roaring,” Lars said. “But I think it’s gonna take me a while to figure that one out.”

“Don’t worry! I know you’ll be able to figure it out!” Steven beamed.

“Yeah,” Lars said. He didn’t doubt the younger boy; this was just the start of what he’d be able to do, he was certain of it.

#lars barriga #pink lars #steven universe #steven universe fanfiction #steven universe lion #zen talks #zen writes #su #su spoilers #wanted #wanted spoilers #lars

[fascinatedhelix]

Me bitching about SU Cr/tical and other parts of the community below:

If you guys don’t like how the crewniverse does their own show, maybe you should put some energy into making your own thing instead of ruining it for others. It’s a miracle we even have a show with canonical wlw on it that aren’t censored, edited into being cousins, or killed off for cheap angst fuel. Push for more diverse stuff if you don’t like what little we have now. And by god, try not to send death threats and racial slurs to the folks who at least have the balls to try and accommodate everyone, as impossible as it is. You have a right to be offended and not take apologies, but for fucks sake the least you could do is be civil about it!

I hate it when people post ship hate on the tag of the ship they’re complaining about, or any big tag that’ll get lots of views. Tags are there so people have the option of not looking at your bullshit you obnoxious assholes, use them properly! People also like to accuse those who like certain characters or ships of being abusers, even though a lot of them have been abused themselves. What the fuck is up with that? I have as much of a right to ship J/spis to get over my own trauma as you do with your Lap/dot.

I find it tragic and irritating how much lap/dot content on AO3 depends on using Jasper to generate angst and conflict. A lot of it also includes gigantic amounts of butchphobia and transphobia, by making the hard butch the evil abuser and the transsexual a rapist just to give Lapis and Peridot a baby to have as a subject of future fluff. They also like to blend Lapis’s trauma from the mirror with her bad relationship with Jasper, even though they were clearly separate events in canon, only to yet again make Jasper a convenient angst-generator and punching bag for the author’s beef against what they perceive as men in woman’s skin/clothing. Seriously, if you have to blatantly attack a canonically complex character just to have some angst fuel for your ship, what does that say about your ship? To be fair, I am apathetic to Am/dot too. On the other hand, I’ve seen people do that sort of butchphobia and transphobia bullshit on Bismuth too.

I also find it ridiculous how some people are convinced Malachite was even partially Jasper’s fault. Jasper, desperate not to lose to an enemy that clearly had the upper hand over her, reached out to the closest thing to an ally she had at the time: Lapis. Lapis, with her gem healed and no worse for wear than Jasper, could have easily subdued the Quartz with the nearby ocean, but chose instead to drag her fellow gem into it instead. Jasper did not imprison Lapis, because why would she? All Jasper wanted was to fight the Crystal Gems, in her admittedly awful attempt at getting closure after the war. Lapis had used Jasper as her emotional punching bag, and considering Jasper has been a soldier to “No such thing as therapy” Homeworld, she probably had no idea how awful that really was (like many lifelong victims of abuse).

Ultimately, Jasper was not the origin of Lapis’ main trauma, the mirror; that was Homeworld’s doing. Malachite was traumatic, alright, but it’s not the only reason she’s depressed (kind of like someone who had experienced abuse becoming an abuser to another before being forcefully separated from their victim). Lapis still hasn’t apologized for all the awful crap she’s done to anybody in canon; all she does is go “You actually forgive me for that?” which comes off as her way of avoiding responsibility for her actions. It’s like how saying “I’m sorry for hurting your feelings” is a fake apology that puts the wrongdoing into the victim’s hands, unlike “I’m sorry I did (X).” Lashing out is no excuse for abusive behavior, regardless of how brutish or masculine the victim is.

Also, how in the world is Lars/die pedophilia? I always imagined Sadie as being 20 and Lars 19, with Lars being a highschool Senior who got held back a year and Sadie having graduated on time. Sadie still lives with her mom, much like kids who have only just gotten out of highschool or can’t afford to leave just yet (my older siblings have to deal with this problem). It’s one thing to call a ship between a 15 year old and a 20 year old pedophilia, but Lars almost definitely isn’t that young. I‘m pretty sure the crewniverse would make sure to avoid blatant pedo crap from the get go.

And unlike a lot of these thinly veiled TERFs and other folks with no chill, I am being careful to make sure whomever doesn’t want to see this, doesn’t.

#fandom critical #so so much discourse #vent

[horrible-monstrosity]

pool herpes episode -opens with a friendly reminder that mayor mayor's been shat to death on and small minority strong feeeeemale is in charge now thanks i hate it this... is about being random. lolsporkz it's actually an interesting concept interacting with Garnet's visions but fuck that line is dumb and then garnet destroys the donut shop's clothes property and leaves its customers hanging. what an asshole then steven dabbles in wasting food and wasting the time of the people who made it... except then they just communism it out to people, which is... just boringly saccharine now. then we bring up the fact that lars is in spess nd his parents must be fucked up as shit without even mentioning lars and the forget about it good fucking shit

This episode is something like, a good concept with a mediocre/dumb execution. Garnet starts fucking around because the previous episodes left her upset, and for her specifically there's the future vision thing to play into it... but she never showed any of that in the previous episodes since those previous episodes, and the "random" thing is just so... low-level, babyish, unoriginal, uninteresting. Like, she goes to the donut shop, and then just spills coffee everywhere like a fucking asshole, then she and Steven just walk out and spout off the next source of food in their line of sight. Why not try leaving the fucking city? You're just going through the fucking bullet list of minor characters on the SU wiki and reminding us they have hobbies or employment that comprise almost the entirety of their miserable existences. And then she just spouts "iDoN'tkNoWAnYthInGAnYmOrE" over... some fucking kittens. It's never even really been established she relies on her future sight to this degree- we just hear about it for one episode occasionally, basically. And again, she previously showed no signs of being upset over her ability to see Steven's future being fucked with. Nor was it established that this is how her vision worked, that she focused on something like "I expect Steven to act like a child" and went from there. Basically it's dumb

"let's just pick the thing we want to happen and do that" no fucking shit why does anyone need to be told this. not even garnet should need to be told this. I thought Garnet was a character who was supposed to be decisive and "never question yourself" n shiet?

garnet informs us steven totally don't act like a child no more. ... I mean I guess that's actually true, sometimes, kinda, but you shouldn't just fucking tell people what the development has been.

ofc the one garnet picks to keep is gril. ... I don't even know why that's an "of course" thing, but it feels like it is. That they would make sure to push it into our faces that new cat character is feeeeemale. and then they call her steven because muh genders donut realll stephen just cut off your balls already

and then vidalia painted steven naked. i feel like i need an adult

lars episode "everyone misses you soooo much! since sadie's busy with the band-" this is exactly the order of sentences steven wrote. "everyone totally misses you" followed up immediately by "have I mentioned sadie and the cool kids have completely entirely moved on lol". man remember when lars really wanted to be a part of that social group and was really fucked up over it? remember when things mattered? rmemeber we're supposed to hate Ronaldo for not thinking Lars is in space when he's just told it with no context and clearly he just thinks it sounds like bullshit. man remember when ronald and lars were some kind of friends? then ronald acts like even more of a dumbass for the entertainment of the audience. it's bad. mayor guy is empty inside. yeps, we get it, men are just sad failures and midget minority women are belelglrlblelgllrlelblelglrlb;e, even when the man is also a minority of some kind. then sadie gets mad at mayor for trying to be involved in his son's life. It's never explained whose bedsheets those even are, either- if it's his own then Sadie is just being an presumptuous abusive asshole, if it's hers then that would be so stupid of him I'd think it'd be impossible to have actually happened unless the writers were warping reality to create yet another scenario to shit on sad empty minority man. the beach city laughtards when the fuck did peridop join a fucking comedy troupe when did this even become a thing what is this shit then the actor man attempts to show his actual prowess at doing the things and everyone shits on him and dewey is sad again. at least actor man is supportive. maybe those two can just move the fuck out of this shit city and find something actually worthwhile to do with their lives away from these assholes.

BEING RICH HAS MADE YOU WEAK and then dewey gets hit in the fuck face we geeeetttt itttttttt fuckin commies then pedey shits on dewey too! his mayormobile is just trash! potatoes! well of course everyone's done with you~~ people grew up, lollllll aaaaand finally he's demoted to working at the fucking donut shop. ... I feel like the show has done something like this before. Put someone (most likely a man) in a completely sad and demeaning position and because they've been shit on so much prior they're happy with this sad scrap of life and it's supposed to be a good thing. It was probably Greg. Steven does a donut named after Lars, and this is supposed to mean the town cares about and is thinking of him, buuut... the selling point is that it's pink. That's just... no. Wh- where do I even start with this? The pink thing is a recent development. That in itself isn't the problem, but... the townsies did not know Lars as the pink guy. Him being pink is the mark of him having been dragged into space and having his old life irrevocably removed from his grasp. So Steven is telling the townsies to appreciate, and telling Lars he's being appreciated for, something the townsies never saw in him. Steven is basically telling Lars nothing the townies knew about him was worth anything. His personality? Him as a friend? Naw, go fuck yourself! Now that you're pink and in space we're all so much happier and have donuts and shit! The "who the heck is peridot" line is supposed to be a joke and is almost actually funny, but its inclusion here makes it seem like everyone else in the letter who did know him doesn't necessarily give a goddamn, leaving us to infer from their actions that they indeed do not give a goddamn. Maybe his parents care, but we barely fucking see them, instead we get Garnet babbling about Onion's parents and dodging the issue entirely.

#succ #steven pooniverse